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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:42,475 Lucy, for goodness' sakes, aren't you ready yet? 2 00:00:42,475 --> 00:00:44,477 I'll be ready in a minute, dear. 3 00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:46,479 Hurry up, we're going to miss 4 00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:47,981 the start of the movie. 5 00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:50,984 I'll be ready in a minute, dear. 6 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,486 I wonder what time that feature starts. 7 00:00:53,486 --> 00:00:55,488 What did you do with the paper? 8 00:00:55,488 --> 00:00:57,490 I'll be ready in a minute, dear. 9 00:00:57,490 --> 00:00:59,993 "I'll be ready in a minute, dear." 10 00:00:59,993 --> 00:01:01,995 "I'll be ready in a minute, dear." 11 00:01:01,995 --> 00:01:02,996 Ay-ay-ay. 12 00:01:02,996 --> 00:01:04,497 Oh, there it is. 13 00:01:08,501 --> 00:01:12,005 High Noon, Gary Cooper... 14 00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:14,007 8:23! 15 00:01:14,007 --> 00:01:16,009 I'll be ready in a minute, dear. 16 00:01:16,009 --> 00:01:17,510 Ay-ay-ay. 17 00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:21,514 Lucy, you haven't even got your dress on yet. 18 00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:23,516 You were supposed to be ready an hour ago. 19 00:01:23,516 --> 00:01:25,018 Well, it's all your fault. 20 00:01:25,018 --> 00:01:26,019 My fault? 21 00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:27,520 Yes, I wasted an hour 22 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:29,022 telling you I'd be ready in a minute. 23 00:01:29,522 --> 00:01:31,024 Oh, now, come on, what are you doing? 24 00:01:31,024 --> 00:01:33,526 Now, honey, I'm almost ready and you're not helping any. 25 00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:35,528 If you want to make yourself useful 26 00:01:35,528 --> 00:01:37,030 get a dress out for me to put on. 27 00:01:37,030 --> 00:01:38,531 All right, all right. 28 00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,036 Which dress you want to wear? 29 00:01:44,537 --> 00:01:46,039 Well, which dress you want to put on? 30 00:01:46,539 --> 00:01:47,040 I'm thinking. 31 00:01:47,540 --> 00:01:48,541 I can't make up my mind. 32 00:01:49,042 --> 00:01:50,043 Put on any dress, honey. 33 00:01:50,043 --> 00:01:51,544 The Mertzes will be here in a minute. 34 00:01:51,544 --> 00:01:52,545 What makes you think so? 35 00:01:52,545 --> 00:01:54,047 I talked to Ethel ten minutes ago. 36 00:01:54,047 --> 00:01:55,548 She wasn't anywhere near ready. 37 00:01:55,548 --> 00:01:56,549 She'll be here. 38 00:01:57,050 --> 00:02:00,053 Fred told me that tonight she's going to be here 39 00:02:00,053 --> 00:02:03,556 ready to go, with her coat on, at 8:00, no matter what. 40 00:02:03,556 --> 00:02:04,557 Hah! If I know Ethel 41 00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:06,559 she's just about getting out of the tub. 42 00:02:06,559 --> 00:02:08,561 Well, look, just in case 43 00:02:08,561 --> 00:02:10,063 they happen to be on time 44 00:02:10,063 --> 00:02:13,066 would you please decide which dress you want to put on? 45 00:02:13,066 --> 00:02:15,068 Well, what dress would you like me to wear? 46 00:02:18,071 --> 00:02:19,572 How about this one, eh? 47 00:02:19,572 --> 00:02:20,573 You like that dress? 48 00:02:21,074 --> 00:02:23,576 Yeah, sure, I like it, it's beautiful, fine. 49 00:02:23,576 --> 00:02:26,079 No, Ethel's seen me in that so much. 50 00:02:29,582 --> 00:02:30,583 How about this one? 51 00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:33,586 Oh, honey, everybody's seen me in that. 52 00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:40,593 Oh, I wouldn't wear that to a movie. 53 00:02:40,593 --> 00:02:42,095 Why not? 54 00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:44,097 Don't tell me Gary Cooper has seen you in it. 55 00:02:46,099 --> 00:02:47,600 No, it's too tight. 56 00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:49,102 Ay-ay-ay. 57 00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:51,104 FRED: Hi, Rick, here we are! 58 00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:52,105 You folks ready? 59 00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:54,607 We'll be ready in a minute, dear. 60 00:02:57,610 --> 00:02:59,112 Now you got me doing it. 61 00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:01,114 You see, he's got Ethel up here, ready to go 62 00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:02,115 just like he said he would. 63 00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:03,616 You go out and talk to them, dear. 64 00:03:03,616 --> 00:03:04,617 I'll be right out. 65 00:03:04,617 --> 00:03:05,618 Okay. 66 00:03:05,618 --> 00:03:07,620 Now, look, if you're not ready in five minutes 67 00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:08,621 we're going to go without you. 68 00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,123 Yes, dear. 69 00:03:10,123 --> 00:03:11,124 All right. 70 00:03:13,126 --> 00:03:14,627 Hiya, Fred, hi, Ethel. 71 00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:15,628 Hi, Rick. 72 00:03:15,628 --> 00:03:17,130 You did better than I did. 73 00:03:17,130 --> 00:03:18,131 Lucy's still dressing. 74 00:03:18,631 --> 00:03:19,632 You're not firm enough. 75 00:03:19,632 --> 00:03:22,135 Well, I'll be firm enough tomorrow night, boy. 76 00:03:22,635 --> 00:03:25,138 We're going to have dinner with the new buss. 77 00:03:25,138 --> 00:03:27,640 You're having dinner with a bus? 78 00:03:29,642 --> 00:03:33,146 Mr. Littlefield-- the fellow that bought the nightclub-- 79 00:03:33,146 --> 00:03:35,148 I work for him now; he's my buss. 80 00:03:35,148 --> 00:03:37,650 Oh, I thought you meant bus 81 00:03:37,650 --> 00:03:40,653 like they have at the boss station. 82 00:03:40,653 --> 00:03:41,654 Oh. 83 00:03:41,654 --> 00:03:43,156 Yeah. 84 00:03:43,156 --> 00:03:45,158 Well, she better be on time tomorrow night 85 00:03:45,158 --> 00:03:46,659 or she'll really be known 86 00:03:46,659 --> 00:03:48,661 as the late Mrs. Ricardo. 87 00:03:48,661 --> 00:03:49,662 I heard that remark. 88 00:03:49,662 --> 00:03:50,663 Hi, Fred. Hi, Lucy. 89 00:03:50,663 --> 00:03:51,664 Hi, Ethel. 90 00:03:51,664 --> 00:03:53,666 Oh, gee, do you look pretty! 91 00:03:53,666 --> 00:03:55,168 Is that new? 92 00:03:55,168 --> 00:03:57,170 What's the matter with you? 93 00:03:57,170 --> 00:03:58,671 Oh, she's mad at me. 94 00:03:58,671 --> 00:04:01,174 When I say 8:00, ready or not, I mean it. 95 00:04:01,674 --> 00:04:03,176 I don't get it. 96 00:04:14,804 --> 00:04:17,307 Lucy, it's one minute to 7:00 97 00:04:17,307 --> 00:04:19,809 and we're supposed to be there at 7:30. 98 00:04:20,310 --> 00:04:22,312 I'll be ready in a minute, dear. 99 00:04:22,812 --> 00:04:24,314 Lucy, I'm telling you 100 00:04:24,314 --> 00:04:27,317 I don't want anything to go wrong tonight. 101 00:04:27,317 --> 00:04:29,319 I'm talking to Mr. Littlefield 102 00:04:29,319 --> 00:04:31,821 about making me the manager of the club. 103 00:04:31,821 --> 00:04:35,325 Now, I'm going to give you 25 seconds... 104 00:04:35,825 --> 00:04:37,327 20 seconds... 105 00:04:37,327 --> 00:04:39,329 What were you saying, dear? 106 00:04:41,331 --> 00:04:45,335 Lucy, you're all dressed and ready to go. 107 00:04:45,835 --> 00:04:47,337 Naturally. 108 00:04:47,337 --> 00:04:50,840 Well, I apologize for everything I ever said. 109 00:04:51,841 --> 00:04:52,842 How did you do it? 110 00:04:53,343 --> 00:04:54,844 I played a little trick on myself. 111 00:04:54,844 --> 00:04:55,845 What do you mean? 112 00:04:55,845 --> 00:04:57,347 Well, knowing my own weakness 113 00:04:57,347 --> 00:04:59,349 I wanted to make sure that I'd be on time 114 00:04:59,349 --> 00:05:00,850 so I turned the clock back 115 00:05:00,850 --> 00:05:02,352 so I'd have an extra hour. 116 00:05:02,352 --> 00:05:04,354 it's only 6:00, instead of 7:00. 117 00:05:04,354 --> 00:05:05,855 Why, honey, that's wonderful. 118 00:05:05,855 --> 00:05:06,856 I'm proud of you. 119 00:05:07,357 --> 00:05:08,358 Thank you. 120 00:05:08,358 --> 00:05:10,360 You know, I can really get things done 121 00:05:10,360 --> 00:05:12,362 if I just put my mind to it. 122 00:05:12,362 --> 00:05:13,863 Oh, gee, I hope the Littlefields 123 00:05:14,364 --> 00:05:15,365 have a good dinner. 124 00:05:15,365 --> 00:05:16,366 I'm starved. 125 00:05:16,366 --> 00:05:18,368 Me, too-- I didn't have any lunch. 126 00:05:18,868 --> 00:05:21,371 You know, that clock idea is real clever. 127 00:05:21,371 --> 00:05:24,374 I should have thought of that a long time ago. 128 00:05:24,374 --> 00:05:25,375 Come on, honey. 129 00:05:25,375 --> 00:05:26,876 Okay, dear. 130 00:05:28,878 --> 00:05:31,881 Gee, look how dark it is, and it's only 6:00. 131 00:05:32,382 --> 00:05:34,884 Yeah, well, the days are getting shorter. 132 00:05:34,884 --> 00:05:37,387 No, they're not, they're getting longer. 133 00:05:43,393 --> 00:05:44,394 Lucy? 134 00:05:44,394 --> 00:05:45,395 What? 135 00:05:45,395 --> 00:05:47,897 Which way did you turn this clock? 136 00:05:49,899 --> 00:05:51,901 Forward or backwards? 137 00:05:51,901 --> 00:05:53,903 Backwards, so I'd get an extra hour. 138 00:05:54,404 --> 00:05:55,405 Oh, no! 139 00:05:55,405 --> 00:05:57,407 You should have turned it forward. 140 00:05:57,407 --> 00:05:58,408 Forward? 141 00:05:58,408 --> 00:06:00,410 Sure, then when it said 7:00 142 00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:01,911 it would only be 6:00. 143 00:06:01,911 --> 00:06:02,912 It's now 8:00. 144 00:06:02,912 --> 00:06:04,414 Eww... 145 00:06:05,915 --> 00:06:07,917 We'll be an hour late for dinner. 146 00:06:07,917 --> 00:06:09,419 Come on, will you? 147 00:06:09,419 --> 00:06:10,420 Oh, no! 148 00:06:13,806 --> 00:06:15,308 Alvin, what do you suppose 149 00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:17,810 could have happened to the Ricardos? 150 00:06:17,810 --> 00:06:18,811 I can't imagine. 151 00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:21,314 I told them dinner at 7:30. 152 00:06:21,314 --> 00:06:22,315 It's nearly 8:30 now. 153 00:06:22,815 --> 00:06:25,318 Really, when I realize how you rushed me. 154 00:06:25,318 --> 00:06:26,819 "Have it ready on time." 155 00:06:26,819 --> 00:06:28,821 "Have it ready on time." 156 00:06:28,821 --> 00:06:30,823 "Be sure it's ready on time." 157 00:06:30,823 --> 00:06:33,826 Phoebe, you know I consider tardiness a major sin. 158 00:06:33,826 --> 00:06:37,330 I wish I could get you to feel that way. 159 00:06:37,330 --> 00:06:42,335 Oh, darling, why do you persist in sneaking these in here? 160 00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:44,337 They're so cheap-looking. 161 00:06:46,339 --> 00:06:48,341 We can afford real fruit, you know. 162 00:06:48,341 --> 00:06:49,342 Alvin... 163 00:06:49,342 --> 00:06:50,843 Mama gave us that wax fruit 164 00:06:50,843 --> 00:06:51,844 for our wedding anniversary. 165 00:06:51,844 --> 00:06:52,845 You put it right back... 166 00:06:52,845 --> 00:06:53,846 I don't care, Phoebe... 167 00:06:54,347 --> 00:06:56,349 (doorbell buzzes) 168 00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:58,851 Oh, there they are now. 169 00:07:07,860 --> 00:07:09,362 Well, come in, come in, come in. 170 00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:11,364 I don't believe you've met Mrs. Littlefield. 171 00:07:11,364 --> 00:07:12,365 Phoebe, may I present 172 00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:13,366 Mrs. Ricardo, Mr. Ricardo. 173 00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:14,867 How do you do? How do you do? 174 00:07:14,867 --> 00:07:15,868 Pleasure. 175 00:07:15,868 --> 00:07:17,870 I'm so sorry that we're late. 176 00:07:17,870 --> 00:07:18,871 It's just disgraceful. 177 00:07:19,372 --> 00:07:19,872 It's quite all... 178 00:07:20,373 --> 00:07:21,374 Won't you sit down? 179 00:07:21,374 --> 00:07:22,375 Mr. Ricardo 180 00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:24,877 you come and sit here next to me. 181 00:07:24,877 --> 00:07:25,878 Thank you, thank you. 182 00:07:25,878 --> 00:07:28,881 Gee, I hope we haven't ruined your dinner. 183 00:07:28,881 --> 00:07:30,383 Oh, not at all. 184 00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:31,384 Of course not. 185 00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:32,385 Oh, that's good. 186 00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:35,388 It was delicious. 187 00:07:37,390 --> 00:07:39,892 You mean you finished dinner? 188 00:07:39,892 --> 00:07:41,394 Oh, some time ago. 189 00:07:41,394 --> 00:07:44,397 When I say 7:30, I mean 7:30. 190 00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:45,398 Oh. 191 00:07:45,398 --> 00:07:47,400 Of course, I could fix you something 192 00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:49,402 even though everything has been put away 193 00:07:49,402 --> 00:07:50,903 and the dishes are all washed. 194 00:07:50,903 --> 00:07:55,408 Oh, well, I hate to bother you, but, gee, I'm so darn hungry... 195 00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:57,410 No, thank you, Mrs. Littlefield, we've eaten. 196 00:07:57,410 --> 00:07:58,911 But Ricky... 197 00:07:58,911 --> 00:08:00,413 We've eaten. 198 00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:03,916 (audience laughing) 199 00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:04,917 See, when we saw 200 00:08:04,917 --> 00:08:06,919 that we couldn't get a cab right away 201 00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:08,421 we had a little snack. 202 00:08:08,421 --> 00:08:10,923 MRS. LITTLEFIELD: Oh, well, if you're quite sure. 203 00:08:10,923 --> 00:08:13,926 It's too bad you couldn't make it for dinner. 204 00:08:13,926 --> 00:08:15,428 Phoebe outdid herself. 205 00:08:15,428 --> 00:08:16,929 It wasn't anything special. 206 00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:18,431 Just pork chops. 207 00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:19,432 Pork chops? 208 00:08:19,932 --> 00:08:21,434 Oh, they're my favorite. 209 00:08:21,934 --> 00:08:23,936 Oh, then you would have loved these. 210 00:08:23,936 --> 00:08:25,438 They were stuffed 211 00:08:25,438 --> 00:08:28,941 and about that thick. 212 00:08:28,941 --> 00:08:29,942 About that thick? 213 00:08:30,443 --> 00:08:32,445 And the potatoes were a masterpiece. 214 00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:33,946 Now, Alvin! 215 00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:36,449 But they were, my dear, they were-- 216 00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:39,952 baked, and with big globs of cheese... 217 00:08:41,454 --> 00:08:43,456 and butter. 218 00:08:43,456 --> 00:08:45,958 Big globs of cheese and butter? 219 00:08:45,958 --> 00:08:47,960 I must have gained five pounds 220 00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:49,962 what, with all that cheese and butter 221 00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:51,964 and the hollandaise sauce. 222 00:08:51,964 --> 00:08:52,965 Hollandaise sauce? 223 00:08:52,965 --> 00:08:53,966 What was it on? 224 00:08:53,966 --> 00:08:54,967 Asparagus tips-- 225 00:08:55,468 --> 00:08:58,471 fresh, tender asparagus tips. 226 00:09:02,975 --> 00:09:06,479 Are you sure you've both had dinner? 227 00:09:06,479 --> 00:09:07,980 Oh, yes, we had plenty. 228 00:09:07,980 --> 00:09:08,981 Didn't we, Lucy? 229 00:09:08,981 --> 00:09:10,983 Hollandaise sauce, huh? 230 00:09:10,983 --> 00:09:13,986 Perhaps you'd like an after-dinner mint. 231 00:09:13,986 --> 00:09:15,488 Oh, where are they? Where are they? 232 00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:20,493 (clears throat) 233 00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:23,496 Well, I think I have room 234 00:09:23,496 --> 00:09:26,499 for just one teensy- weensy mint. 235 00:09:26,499 --> 00:09:27,500 I always say 236 00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:30,503 there's nothing quite... 237 00:09:30,503 --> 00:09:35,007 (audience laughing) 238 00:09:44,016 --> 00:09:45,518 There's nothing 239 00:09:45,518 --> 00:09:48,521 quite like a good after-dinner mint, is there? 240 00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:52,024 Oh! 241 00:09:52,024 --> 00:09:54,026 (mumbles) 242 00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:57,530 I'll get some more. 243 00:09:59,532 --> 00:10:01,534 (clears throat) 244 00:10:03,035 --> 00:10:04,537 I must say, Mr. Ricardo 245 00:10:04,537 --> 00:10:07,540 I hope this being late isn't a habit with you. 246 00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:09,041 I like punctuality 247 00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:11,043 in the people who work for me. 248 00:10:11,043 --> 00:10:12,044 Oh, yes, I know. 249 00:10:12,044 --> 00:10:14,046 This was just an accident, sir. 250 00:10:14,046 --> 00:10:16,048 LITTLEFIELD: Well, I hope it was. 251 00:10:22,054 --> 00:10:24,056 (screams:) Mrs. Ricardo! 252 00:10:25,057 --> 00:10:26,058 RICKY: Lucy! 253 00:10:26,058 --> 00:10:28,060 Lucy! 254 00:10:28,060 --> 00:10:29,562 (all yelling) 255 00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:45,277 Honey, I don't know what you're so upset about. 256 00:10:45,778 --> 00:10:49,281 The Littlefields understood when we explained the clock business. 257 00:10:49,281 --> 00:10:52,284 Mrs. Littlefield cooked dinner for us, didn't she? 258 00:10:52,284 --> 00:10:53,285 It doesn't matter. 259 00:10:53,285 --> 00:10:54,787 It was very embarrassing. 260 00:10:54,787 --> 00:10:57,790 She wouldn't have had to go through all that trouble 261 00:10:57,790 --> 00:10:59,291 if you would have been on time. 262 00:10:59,291 --> 00:11:01,794 Now, how long does it take you in the bathtub? 263 00:11:02,294 --> 00:11:04,296 To do what? 264 00:11:06,298 --> 00:11:08,300 What are you writing there? 265 00:11:09,301 --> 00:11:10,803 "Lucy's schedule"? 266 00:11:10,803 --> 00:11:11,804 Lucy who? 267 00:11:11,804 --> 00:11:13,305 Lucy you, that's who. 268 00:11:13,305 --> 00:11:14,807 Let me see this. 269 00:11:14,807 --> 00:11:16,308 I'm making out a schedule 270 00:11:16,308 --> 00:11:18,310 so you can budget your time. 271 00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:19,311 Budget my time? 272 00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:20,813 You mean like I budget my money? 273 00:11:20,813 --> 00:11:21,814 Heaven forbid. 274 00:11:21,814 --> 00:11:22,815 Give me that. 275 00:11:22,815 --> 00:11:24,316 Now, Ricky, listen... 276 00:11:24,316 --> 00:11:25,317 You listen to me. 277 00:11:25,317 --> 00:11:26,819 Now, I'm sick and tired 278 00:11:26,819 --> 00:11:28,320 of you being late all the time. 279 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:30,322 It's obvious you cannot budget your time 280 00:11:30,823 --> 00:11:32,324 so somebody has to do it for you. 281 00:11:32,324 --> 00:11:34,827 Well, I don't think I'm going to like this. 282 00:11:34,827 --> 00:11:35,828 How does it go? 283 00:11:35,828 --> 00:11:38,831 Well, we'll write down everything that you do 284 00:11:38,831 --> 00:11:41,834 and we'll allow so much time for each thing-- 285 00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:44,336 ten minutes for this, 15 minutes for that... 286 00:11:44,336 --> 00:11:48,340 Oh, I'm going to need more than 15 minutes for that. 287 00:11:50,342 --> 00:11:51,844 Never mind. 288 00:11:51,844 --> 00:11:53,846 You're going to go on this schedule 289 00:11:53,846 --> 00:11:56,849 and you're starting tomorrow morning, understand? 290 00:12:16,635 --> 00:12:17,636 Good morning, dear. 291 00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:19,138 Good morning. 292 00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:21,140 How about a good-morning kiss? 293 00:12:22,641 --> 00:12:24,643 Sorry, it's not on the schedule. 294 00:12:30,149 --> 00:12:32,151 You know, as a matter of fact I want to congratulate you 295 00:12:32,151 --> 00:12:34,153 on the way you've been budgeting your time 296 00:12:34,153 --> 00:12:35,154 in the last few days. 297 00:12:35,154 --> 00:12:36,655 Well, as much as I hate to admit it, 298 00:12:36,655 --> 00:12:38,157 this thing does seem to work. 299 00:12:38,157 --> 00:12:39,158 Good. 300 00:12:39,158 --> 00:12:40,159 Is breakfast ready? 301 00:12:40,159 --> 00:12:41,160 Yep, all set. 302 00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,161 There's nothing on the stove. 303 00:12:42,161 --> 00:12:43,662 Where is it? 304 00:12:43,662 --> 00:12:45,164 Well, I knew I wouldn't have time 305 00:12:45,664 --> 00:12:46,665 to cook it this morning. 306 00:12:46,665 --> 00:12:49,168 So, I had some time left over last night 307 00:12:49,168 --> 00:12:51,170 so I cooked breakfast last night. 308 00:12:54,173 --> 00:12:55,174 You did what? 309 00:12:55,174 --> 00:12:56,675 Don't worry about it spoiling. 310 00:12:56,675 --> 00:12:58,177 It's all in the freezer. 311 00:13:12,691 --> 00:13:14,693 Lucy, I can't eat this egg. 312 00:13:14,693 --> 00:13:15,694 Why not? 313 00:13:15,694 --> 00:13:17,696 It's too salty. 314 00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:21,700 Well, I'd cook you another one 315 00:13:22,201 --> 00:13:23,702 but it would throw me off schedule. 316 00:13:23,702 --> 00:13:26,205 Never mind, I have an appointment with Mr. Littlefield. 317 00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:27,706 Just give me some coffee, huh? 318 00:13:27,706 --> 00:13:28,707 Yes, sir. 319 00:13:28,707 --> 00:13:29,708 Thank you. 320 00:13:56,735 --> 00:13:57,736 Lucy... 321 00:13:57,736 --> 00:13:58,737 What's the matter? 322 00:13:58,737 --> 00:14:01,240 You always like iced coffee. 323 00:14:26,682 --> 00:14:28,684 More coffee, Ricky? 324 00:14:28,684 --> 00:14:30,686 Oh, yes, thank you. 325 00:14:31,186 --> 00:14:32,187 Another roll? 326 00:14:32,688 --> 00:14:33,689 Don't mind if I do. 327 00:14:37,192 --> 00:14:40,195 Don't you people ever eat at your house? 328 00:14:40,195 --> 00:14:41,697 Yes, sir. 329 00:14:41,697 --> 00:14:44,700 It's just that I have a very big appetite. 330 00:14:44,700 --> 00:14:46,201 Oh. Oh, I see. 331 00:14:46,201 --> 00:14:48,704 Well, let's get down to business. 332 00:14:48,704 --> 00:14:50,706 I've been thinking over your suggestion 333 00:14:50,706 --> 00:14:52,708 about being the manager of the club 334 00:14:52,708 --> 00:14:54,209 and I'd like to talk to you about it. 335 00:14:54,710 --> 00:14:55,210 Well, certainly. 336 00:14:55,711 --> 00:14:56,712 I've been watching you 337 00:14:56,712 --> 00:14:58,714 and I like the way you handle things. 338 00:14:58,714 --> 00:14:59,715 Oh, thank you. 339 00:14:59,715 --> 00:15:01,216 In fact, you have all the qualifications 340 00:15:01,717 --> 00:15:02,718 to be manager of the Tropicana. 341 00:15:02,718 --> 00:15:05,721 Oh, well, then can I... can I get the job? 342 00:15:06,221 --> 00:15:07,723 No. 343 00:15:07,723 --> 00:15:09,224 Oh. 344 00:15:09,224 --> 00:15:12,728 I'd say yes, except for one little thing-- 345 00:15:12,728 --> 00:15:16,732 that business about being late for dinner the other night. 346 00:15:16,732 --> 00:15:18,734 Oh, but that was my wife's fault. 347 00:15:18,734 --> 00:15:19,735 Oh, that's just it. 348 00:15:19,735 --> 00:15:21,236 If a man can't run his own home 349 00:15:21,236 --> 00:15:23,739 I certainly can't give him a nightclub to manage. 350 00:15:24,239 --> 00:15:25,240 Uh, cigarette? 351 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:26,742 Yes, thank you. 352 00:15:27,242 --> 00:15:29,244 You can appreciate my position, of course. 353 00:15:29,244 --> 00:15:31,747 Oh, yes, sir, I do, of course I do. 354 00:15:33,749 --> 00:15:35,751 Uh... 355 00:15:36,251 --> 00:15:38,754 You see, Mr. Littlefield, you don't understand. 356 00:15:39,254 --> 00:15:40,255 That was before. 357 00:15:40,255 --> 00:15:42,758 Things are all different now. 358 00:15:42,758 --> 00:15:43,759 Oh? 359 00:15:43,759 --> 00:15:44,760 Oh, yes, sir. 360 00:15:45,260 --> 00:15:47,763 The other night when I got home, I laid down the law. 361 00:15:47,763 --> 00:15:50,766 I made out a schedule and I'm making her stick to it. 362 00:15:50,766 --> 00:15:51,767 And? 363 00:15:52,267 --> 00:15:53,769 It's working fine. 364 00:15:53,769 --> 00:15:56,271 She's really doing what you say? 365 00:15:56,271 --> 00:15:57,773 Oh, sir, I got her jumping around 366 00:15:57,773 --> 00:15:59,274 like a trained seal. 367 00:15:59,274 --> 00:16:00,776 A trained seal. 368 00:16:00,776 --> 00:16:01,777 (chuckles) 369 00:16:01,777 --> 00:16:03,779 (chuckles) 370 00:16:03,779 --> 00:16:07,783 Oh, I sure would like to see a thing like that. 371 00:16:08,283 --> 00:16:09,785 Well, why don't you come for dinner tonight 372 00:16:10,285 --> 00:16:11,787 and you can see how the schedule works? 373 00:16:11,787 --> 00:16:12,788 May I bring my wife? 374 00:16:13,288 --> 00:16:14,289 Certainly. 375 00:16:14,289 --> 00:16:15,290 Then she can see 376 00:16:15,290 --> 00:16:17,292 that a house can be run on schedule. 377 00:16:17,292 --> 00:16:19,294 If it works the way you say it does, 378 00:16:19,294 --> 00:16:20,295 you can be the new manager. 379 00:16:20,796 --> 00:16:21,797 Thank you very much. 380 00:16:24,550 --> 00:16:25,050 ETHEL: Hi. 381 00:16:25,551 --> 00:16:26,552 Oh, oh! 382 00:16:26,552 --> 00:16:28,053 Hi, Ethel. 383 00:16:28,053 --> 00:16:29,555 Uh... sit down. 384 00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:31,557 I have three and a half minutes to spare. 385 00:16:31,557 --> 00:16:34,059 Listen, Lucy, you're going to have to cut out 386 00:16:34,059 --> 00:16:35,060 this schedule business. 387 00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:36,562 Why? 388 00:16:36,562 --> 00:16:38,564 'Cause Fred thinks it's a wonderful idea. 389 00:16:38,564 --> 00:16:41,066 If it works out, he's going to put me on one. 390 00:16:41,066 --> 00:16:42,568 Well, truthfully, Ethel 391 00:16:42,568 --> 00:16:44,069 I find that I get everything done 392 00:16:44,069 --> 00:16:45,571 and I have time left over. 393 00:16:45,571 --> 00:16:48,073 Of course, I cheated a little bit. 394 00:16:48,073 --> 00:16:50,576 What do you mean, you cheated a little bit? 395 00:16:50,576 --> 00:16:53,078 I drew in an extra hour at the bottom of the chart. 396 00:16:53,078 --> 00:16:55,581 Where did you get the extra hour? 397 00:16:55,581 --> 00:16:58,584 From the next day. 398 00:16:58,584 --> 00:17:00,085 From the next day? 399 00:17:00,085 --> 00:17:03,589 Yeah, it'll work out fine till the end of the year 400 00:17:03,589 --> 00:17:06,091 and then I'll be two weeks short. 401 00:17:06,091 --> 00:17:07,593 (doorbell buzzes) 402 00:17:08,093 --> 00:17:09,094 Who can that be? 403 00:17:12,097 --> 00:17:14,099 Oh, Mrs. Littlefield! 404 00:17:14,099 --> 00:17:15,100 How do you do? 405 00:17:15,100 --> 00:17:16,101 Come in, won't you? 406 00:17:16,101 --> 00:17:18,604 Uh, this is my neighbor Ethel Mertz. 407 00:17:18,604 --> 00:17:20,606 This is Mrs. Littlefield. 408 00:17:20,606 --> 00:17:21,607 Sit down, won't you? 409 00:17:21,607 --> 00:17:22,608 Thank you. 410 00:17:23,108 --> 00:17:25,110 Well, I... I didn't expect you until tonight. 411 00:17:25,611 --> 00:17:27,613 Mrs. Ricardo, what are you trying to do 412 00:17:28,113 --> 00:17:29,615 to the wives of America? 413 00:17:29,615 --> 00:17:31,617 I beg your pardon? 414 00:17:31,617 --> 00:17:33,118 Your husband told my husband 415 00:17:33,619 --> 00:17:36,622 that you're running this house on a time schedule. 416 00:17:36,622 --> 00:17:37,122 That's right. 417 00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:39,124 You Benedict Arnold. 418 00:17:39,124 --> 00:17:40,626 What do you mean? 419 00:17:40,626 --> 00:17:43,629 We wives have spent years persuading our husbands 420 00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:45,631 that we haven't time to do our work. 421 00:17:46,131 --> 00:17:47,633 Now, if you go through with this 422 00:17:48,133 --> 00:17:49,635 you'll louse it up for all of us. 423 00:17:50,135 --> 00:17:51,136 You're darned right. 424 00:17:51,136 --> 00:17:53,138 My husband wants to put me 425 00:17:53,138 --> 00:17:54,139 on a schedule, too. 426 00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:56,141 If my Alvin sees what he likes 427 00:17:56,642 --> 00:17:57,643 here at dinner tonight 428 00:17:57,643 --> 00:18:00,646 I start punching a time clock tomorrow. 429 00:18:00,646 --> 00:18:02,147 Well, I can't let Ricky down. 430 00:18:02,147 --> 00:18:03,649 He's asked you here tonight 431 00:18:04,149 --> 00:18:05,651 to show you how proud he is of me. 432 00:18:06,151 --> 00:18:07,152 Oh, yes? 433 00:18:07,152 --> 00:18:09,655 Well, I overheard him tell my husband 434 00:18:09,655 --> 00:18:12,157 that he had you hopping around 435 00:18:12,157 --> 00:18:13,659 like a trained seal. 436 00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:17,162 Oh, he didn't mean it like that. 437 00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:20,165 No, of course not. 438 00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:22,668 Trained seal, huh? 439 00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:23,669 It was probably 440 00:18:24,169 --> 00:18:26,171 just an unfortunate choice of words 441 00:18:26,672 --> 00:18:28,674 when he invited us here tonight 442 00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:30,175 to "watch you perform." 443 00:18:30,175 --> 00:18:32,177 "Watch me perform"? 444 00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:34,680 Well, I'm sorry, but you're not going to see me 445 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,682 balance a ball on my nose tonight. 446 00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:37,683 Good girl! 447 00:18:37,683 --> 00:18:39,184 Lucy, what are you going to do? 448 00:18:39,184 --> 00:18:41,186 Will you and Fred come to dinner tonight? 449 00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:42,187 Sure. 450 00:18:42,187 --> 00:18:43,689 This is no time for formality. 451 00:18:43,689 --> 00:18:44,690 Phoebe, will you help me? 452 00:18:44,690 --> 00:18:45,691 Lucy, I'll do anything. 453 00:18:46,191 --> 00:18:47,192 Thank you. 454 00:18:47,192 --> 00:18:48,193 Me, too. 455 00:18:48,193 --> 00:18:49,194 Thank you. 456 00:18:49,194 --> 00:18:51,196 Trained seals of the world, unite! 457 00:18:51,697 --> 00:18:53,699 (barking) 458 00:18:55,584 --> 00:18:56,084 Lucy? 459 00:18:56,585 --> 00:18:58,086 Yes, dear? 460 00:18:58,086 --> 00:18:59,588 Are you sure dinner is going to be ready 461 00:18:59,588 --> 00:19:01,089 when the Littlefields get here? 462 00:19:01,089 --> 00:19:02,090 Now, don't worry, dear. 463 00:19:02,591 --> 00:19:04,092 Everything will come off right on schedule. 464 00:19:04,092 --> 00:19:05,093 Good girl. 465 00:19:05,093 --> 00:19:06,595 I got to hand it to you-- 466 00:19:06,595 --> 00:19:09,097 that schedule idea was a real brainstorm. 467 00:19:09,097 --> 00:19:11,099 I'm putting Ethel on one tomorrow. 468 00:19:11,099 --> 00:19:12,601 RICKY: Attaboy! 469 00:19:12,601 --> 00:19:15,604 You know, that little idea is going to make me 470 00:19:15,604 --> 00:19:16,605 a nightclub manager. 471 00:19:17,105 --> 00:19:17,606 Good. 472 00:19:18,106 --> 00:19:19,107 (doorbell buzzes) 473 00:19:19,107 --> 00:19:20,108 Here they are. 474 00:19:23,111 --> 00:19:24,112 Come on in, come on in. 475 00:19:24,112 --> 00:19:26,114 Hello, good evening, Mr. Littlefield. 476 00:19:26,114 --> 00:19:27,115 How are you? 477 00:19:27,115 --> 00:19:28,116 Oh! 478 00:19:30,118 --> 00:19:31,620 Sit right down here, Mr. Littlefield. 479 00:19:31,620 --> 00:19:33,121 Oh, I'd like you to meet Mr. Mertz. 480 00:19:33,622 --> 00:19:34,623 Mr. Littlefield. 481 00:19:34,623 --> 00:19:36,124 How do you do? Sit right down. 482 00:19:36,124 --> 00:19:37,626 Come in, Mrs. Littlefield. 483 00:19:37,626 --> 00:19:39,127 Right over in here. 484 00:19:40,629 --> 00:19:41,630 Lucy. 485 00:19:42,130 --> 00:19:42,631 What? 486 00:19:43,131 --> 00:19:43,632 What is this? 487 00:19:44,132 --> 00:19:45,133 Well, can't waste time. 488 00:19:45,133 --> 00:19:47,135 Got to keep on schedule, you know. 489 00:19:47,135 --> 00:19:48,136 Oh, oh. 490 00:19:48,136 --> 00:19:49,137 Oh, Mr. Little... 491 00:19:49,137 --> 00:19:49,638 the schedule, you know, 492 00:19:50,138 --> 00:19:51,139 Mr. Littlefield, the schedule. 493 00:19:51,139 --> 00:19:52,641 Oh. Oh, yeah, very interesting. 494 00:19:52,641 --> 00:19:53,642 Well, let's talk. 495 00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:55,143 How have you been, Mr. Littlefield? 496 00:19:55,644 --> 00:19:56,645 Oh, fine, fine. 497 00:19:56,645 --> 00:19:58,146 I had a cold, but I went to the doctor. 498 00:19:58,146 --> 00:19:59,147 He gave me a shot. 499 00:19:59,147 --> 00:20:00,649 It went right away. 500 00:20:00,649 --> 00:20:03,151 Of course, there's been a lot of colds going around... 501 00:20:03,151 --> 00:20:04,152 Time's up! 502 00:20:04,152 --> 00:20:05,654 How are you, Fred? 503 00:20:08,156 --> 00:20:09,658 Not so good-- I got kind of a hitch... 504 00:20:09,658 --> 00:20:12,661 Sorry. Mr. Littlefield used up all your time. 505 00:20:12,661 --> 00:20:13,662 How about a drink? 506 00:20:13,662 --> 00:20:14,663 Yeah, that's a good idea. 507 00:20:14,663 --> 00:20:15,664 I'd love one! 508 00:20:15,664 --> 00:20:17,165 Yeah, so would I; had a hard day. 509 00:20:17,165 --> 00:20:18,667 A drink would just hit the spot. 510 00:20:18,667 --> 00:20:20,669 Well, it's too bad we don't have time for one. 511 00:20:21,169 --> 00:20:22,170 Well, let's sit down and eat. 512 00:20:22,170 --> 00:20:23,672 You sit right here, Mr. Littlefield. 513 00:20:24,172 --> 00:20:26,174 Fred, you're right across from Mr. Littlefield. 514 00:20:26,174 --> 00:20:28,176 Mrs. Littlefield, would you help me in the kitchen? 515 00:20:28,176 --> 00:20:29,177 I'd love to. 516 00:20:29,678 --> 00:20:31,179 Lucy, Mrs. Littlefield is a guest. 517 00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:32,180 I don't mind. 518 00:20:32,681 --> 00:20:33,682 She doesn't mind. 519 00:20:37,185 --> 00:20:39,688 Well, I'm really hungry. 520 00:20:39,688 --> 00:20:40,689 Me, too. 521 00:20:40,689 --> 00:20:41,690 Well, that's good 522 00:20:42,190 --> 00:20:45,193 because Lucy's a wonderful little cook, you know. 523 00:20:45,193 --> 00:20:46,695 RICKY: Yes, sir! 524 00:20:46,695 --> 00:20:47,696 Soup. 525 00:20:47,696 --> 00:20:48,697 Soup! 526 00:20:48,697 --> 00:20:50,699 Oh, and doesn't that look good. 527 00:20:50,699 --> 00:20:52,200 RICKY: Isn't that nice? 528 00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:54,202 LUCY: Well, dig in, everybody. 529 00:20:58,707 --> 00:21:00,709 Lucy, where are you going? 530 00:21:00,709 --> 00:21:02,711 It's all the time we had for soup. 531 00:21:02,711 --> 00:21:04,713 Got to stick to the schedule, you know. 532 00:21:04,713 --> 00:21:05,714 The schedule. 533 00:21:05,714 --> 00:21:06,715 The schedule. 534 00:21:14,222 --> 00:21:17,225 I didn't have time to taste it. 535 00:21:17,225 --> 00:21:18,226 (audience laughing) 536 00:21:18,226 --> 00:21:20,228 Too bad. It was delicious. 537 00:21:20,228 --> 00:21:24,733 I wonder what kind it was. 538 00:21:25,734 --> 00:21:27,235 Split pea, I think. 539 00:21:31,239 --> 00:21:33,241 Split pea, yep. 540 00:21:37,245 --> 00:21:38,246 Salad. 541 00:21:38,246 --> 00:21:39,247 Salad! 542 00:21:39,247 --> 00:21:40,248 Well, this is a nice salad. 543 00:21:40,248 --> 00:21:41,249 Looks fine. 544 00:21:41,249 --> 00:21:42,250 Doesn't that look good. 545 00:21:42,751 --> 00:21:43,752 That is really... 546 00:21:43,752 --> 00:21:45,253 (audience laughing) 547 00:21:59,501 --> 00:22:01,470 Did you get any? 548 00:22:02,971 --> 00:22:03,972 Me, either. 549 00:22:07,476 --> 00:22:08,477 Look, look. 550 00:22:08,977 --> 00:22:10,979 There's a radish. 551 00:22:10,979 --> 00:22:11,980 Ah! 552 00:22:14,983 --> 00:22:16,985 (chortles) 553 00:22:22,491 --> 00:22:24,493 RICKY: Lucy! 554 00:22:24,493 --> 00:22:25,994 What are you trying to do? 555 00:22:25,994 --> 00:22:27,996 Just trying to stay on schedule. 556 00:22:28,497 --> 00:22:29,498 I'll talk to you later. 557 00:22:29,498 --> 00:22:30,999 Well, okay. 558 00:22:30,999 --> 00:22:34,002 I think I have some free time at 11:43 tonight. 559 00:22:36,004 --> 00:22:38,507 What's the matter, Mr. Littlefield? 560 00:22:38,507 --> 00:22:41,009 There's a shirt button in my water glass! 561 00:22:41,009 --> 00:22:42,010 Lucy! 562 00:22:42,010 --> 00:22:43,512 LUCY: Yes, dear? 563 00:22:44,012 --> 00:22:46,798 There's a shirt button in Mr. Littlefield's water glass! 564 00:22:46,798 --> 00:22:48,650 Oh, well, I know how that happened. 565 00:22:48,650 --> 00:22:50,652 You see, I found that I could save time 566 00:22:50,652 --> 00:22:53,155 by washing the dishes and the clothes together. 567 00:23:06,668 --> 00:23:08,170 What is this? 568 00:23:08,170 --> 00:23:10,172 Steak and peas. 569 00:23:10,172 --> 00:23:11,173 They look frozen. 570 00:23:11,173 --> 00:23:12,674 They are. 571 00:23:12,674 --> 00:23:15,677 You see, there's no time on the schedule for defrosting. 572 00:23:15,677 --> 00:23:17,179 But don't worry. 573 00:23:17,179 --> 00:23:19,681 We have some nice hot biscuits. 574 00:23:19,681 --> 00:23:22,184 Ethel, let's have those biscuits! 575 00:23:22,184 --> 00:23:23,685 Here we go, girl! 576 00:23:23,685 --> 00:23:25,187 LUCY: Right smack through the middle! 577 00:23:25,187 --> 00:23:26,688 There we go, yes, sir! 578 00:23:26,688 --> 00:23:27,689 Pass them right along. 579 00:23:27,689 --> 00:23:28,690 That a girl! 580 00:23:28,690 --> 00:23:31,193 Come on, Ethel, that's it, kid! 581 00:23:31,193 --> 00:23:32,194 Faster, faster. 582 00:23:32,194 --> 00:23:33,195 There we go. 583 00:23:33,195 --> 00:23:34,196 Come on, a little faster! 584 00:23:34,196 --> 00:23:35,197 That a girl, kid. 585 00:23:35,197 --> 00:23:37,199 Right straight through the middle! 586 00:23:37,199 --> 00:23:38,200 That a girl, very good. 587 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:39,701 Just... 588 00:23:39,701 --> 00:23:40,702 Just a minute! 589 00:23:40,702 --> 00:23:42,204 I've had enough of this. 590 00:23:42,204 --> 00:23:43,705 I tell you... 591 00:23:43,705 --> 00:23:45,707 (audience laughing) 592 00:23:48,210 --> 00:23:49,211 Mr. Littlefield, please. 593 00:23:49,211 --> 00:23:50,212 Please, Mr. Littlefield. 594 00:23:50,712 --> 00:23:52,714 I think I can explain this, Mr. Littlefield. 595 00:23:52,714 --> 00:23:53,715 So can I! 596 00:23:53,715 --> 00:23:55,217 You've got this poor girl terrified. 597 00:23:55,217 --> 00:23:56,718 She's scared to death of you. 598 00:23:56,718 --> 00:23:58,220 She's afraid of losing a second. 599 00:23:58,220 --> 00:23:59,221 Anyone can see that. 600 00:23:59,221 --> 00:24:00,222 Yeah! 601 00:24:00,222 --> 00:24:01,223 What a temper you must have. 602 00:24:01,723 --> 00:24:02,724 Yeah. 603 00:24:02,724 --> 00:24:05,727 It's one thing wearing the trousers in the family 604 00:24:05,727 --> 00:24:07,729 but it's another being a Simon Legree 605 00:24:07,729 --> 00:24:09,231 an ogre, a... a... 606 00:24:09,231 --> 00:24:10,232 Monster. 607 00:24:10,232 --> 00:24:11,233 Yeah. 608 00:24:11,233 --> 00:24:12,234 Yeah. 609 00:24:15,237 --> 00:24:17,239 Well, maybe I have been cracking down 610 00:24:17,239 --> 00:24:18,240 a little bit too hard. 611 00:24:18,740 --> 00:24:20,242 MR. LITTLEFIELD: I should say you have. 612 00:24:20,242 --> 00:24:23,745 Now, first, we're going to get rid of this nonsense! 613 00:24:31,253 --> 00:24:32,254 RICKY: Yes, sir. 614 00:24:32,754 --> 00:24:36,258 Being a slave driver is no way to run a home. 615 00:24:36,258 --> 00:24:37,259 No, sir. 616 00:24:37,259 --> 00:24:38,760 But... it's the only way 617 00:24:39,261 --> 00:24:42,764 to run a nightclub, Mr. Manager. 618 00:24:42,764 --> 00:24:44,266 Mr. Manager! 619 00:24:44,266 --> 00:24:45,767 Mr. Manager! 620 00:24:54,759 --> 00:24:57,679 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 621 00:25:03,185 --> 00:25:05,187 Mr. Littlefield was played by Gale Gordon 622 00:25:05,687 --> 00:25:08,190 and Mrs. Littlefield was played by Edith Meiser. 40905

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