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1
00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:16,141
I just hope it doesn't cause any
permanent damage.
2
00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:25,734
- How long have you been here, anyway?
- A while.
3
00:00:27,611 --> 00:00:30,405
- You missed your prom?
- Yeah.
4
00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:39,790
The thing is, when I made that bet--
5
00:00:40,332 --> 00:00:44,503
There he is. It's Freddie.
He's wearing a tux.
6
00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:48,507
What's up? I met a whole other
person inside of you.
7
00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:53,095
There's a whole other person
inside of both of us.
8
00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,414
Would the whole other person...
9
00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:23,667
...like to dance?
10
00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:27,504
Yes.
11
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:31,091
- Morning, sweetie!
- Daddy!
12
00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:34,136
- Why are you in here?
- Why am I in here?
13
00:01:34,386 --> 00:01:36,305
It's her birthday, Dad.
14
00:01:36,555 --> 00:01:39,182
Happy birthday, sweetie.
15
00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:46,690
- What's that buzzing sound?
- I just need a minute, here.
16
00:01:46,898 --> 00:01:48,900
Maybe it's that construction.
17
00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:51,320
Where's my little angel?
18
00:01:51,528 --> 00:01:53,196
Happy birthday, honey.
19
00:01:53,405 --> 00:01:54,573
Grandma? Grandpa?
20
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,241
Rosco!
21
00:01:59,536 --> 00:02:01,538
Rosco, go.
22
00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,416
- Hello.
- Father O'Flannagan?
23
00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:07,878
I brought your special friends
from the center!
24
00:02:08,086 --> 00:02:10,589
- Happy birthday!
- Janey's making faces.
25
00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:12,633
It smells in here.
26
00:02:13,008 --> 00:02:14,885
Okay, make a wish, dear.
27
00:02:15,844 --> 00:02:17,095
No.
28
00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:33,528
Let's begin now.
29
00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:47,042
This isn't a typical high school.
30
00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:51,880
At John Hughes, there are no cliques,
no exclusive social groups.
31
00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:55,550
You're accepted for you,
not who you hang outwith.
32
00:02:55,801 --> 00:02:59,930
We'll divide into groups
so you can get to know your peers.
33
00:03:00,138 --> 00:03:03,433
Let's get all you jocks
in one group...
34
00:03:03,642 --> 00:03:07,187
...and get you slutty girls
over here by me.
35
00:03:07,396 --> 00:03:09,606
Hey, how you doing?
Welcome.
36
00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:12,651
You losers should
hang out in the back.
37
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:16,446
That clearly includes you.
Come on, get back there.
38
00:03:16,655 --> 00:03:19,449
Take a look at the kid
standing beside you.
39
00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:24,705
They're your only friends
for the next four years.
40
00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:27,207
Okay, let's move it, people!
41
00:03:38,635 --> 00:03:41,513
- You need to start dating.
- I don't date. You know that.
42
00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:43,598
Janey, you know Dad's rule.
43
00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:45,642
I can't have sex before you.
44
00:03:45,851 --> 00:03:49,062
I don't conform to
typical high-school norms.
45
00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:53,608
I read Sylvia Plath,
listen to Bikini Kill and eat tofu.
46
00:03:53,817 --> 00:03:57,320
- I'm a unique rebel.
- More like you're a lesbo.
47
00:03:57,529 --> 00:03:59,948
Mitch, leave your sister alone.
48
00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:01,533
Thank you, Daddy.
49
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:04,745
If Janey wants to be a rug-muncher,
that's her decision.
50
00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:10,500
Go! Fight! Win!
51
00:04:16,298 --> 00:04:19,050
Nice combination, Crissy!
52
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:26,558
I've been meaning to get that fixed.
53
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,186
Later, Dad.
54
00:04:29,644 --> 00:04:33,315
Hey, I'll be late to pick you up.
55
00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:35,484
Why? A job interview?
56
00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:39,154
No, honey.
I'll probably just be way too drunk.
57
00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:41,907
That's good.
No drinking and driving.
58
00:04:42,157 --> 00:04:45,994
Oh, I'll be driving.
I'll just be too drunk to remember.
59
00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:48,705
Okay. Bye, DaddV-
60
00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:51,041
Bye, pumpkin-head.
61
00:04:56,588 --> 00:04:59,049
- Oh, my God!
- Get out of the road!
62
00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,568
Oh, my God, it's Jake.
63
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:22,239
- Hi, stud.
- Hi, Jake.
64
00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:26,326
- I love that thing with his eyebrows.
- Those sideburns.
65
00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:30,038
Oh, my God, there's Jake.
He's so popular.
66
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:32,707
He just looked at me.
67
00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:35,585
- Here. You can keep it.
- Tiff.
68
00:05:35,794 --> 00:05:38,547
Hi, Jake. It's all wet.
69
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:40,590
Melanie.
70
00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:42,801
Hey, Jake.
71
00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:44,719
Hey, Arthur.
72
00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:56,106
Here's Ricky!
73
00:05:56,314 --> 00:05:58,316
Hey, Ricky.
How was your weekend?
74
00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:03,154
Friday night I stood
outside your window in the rain...
75
00:06:03,405 --> 00:06:04,948
...screaming your name.
76
00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:09,327
Then I spent Saturday and Sunday
making you this great...
77
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:13,832
...I've-been-desperately-trying-
to-tell-you-that...
78
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:16,334
...I'm-madly-in-love-with-you...
79
00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:18,587
...mix tape for your birthday.
80
00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:22,173
A mix tape?
That's so sweet, Ricky.
81
00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:25,343
See you in English.
82
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:30,515
Catch you guy later.
83
00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:35,520
What happening?
84
00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:39,232
Damn, Shorty, Dog is pretending
to be Asian and shit.
85
00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:44,195
That cracker is white!
Can't he see that, yo?
86
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,157
Did you get any action this weekend?
87
00:06:47,365 --> 00:06:50,952
- I visit grandfather.
- I played with my sisters.
88
00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:52,537
We're pathetic.
89
00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:56,499
How will we ever lose our virginity
by graduation?
90
00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:59,377
- We're freshmen.
- What's with the attitude?
91
00:06:59,628 --> 00:07:03,214
- Not easy to get lucky here.
- Girls are sensitive.
92
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:07,552
They're not looking for sex.
They're looking for love.
93
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,221
Love me! Harder!
94
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,730
Amanda Becker.
95
00:07:20,398 --> 00:07:23,652
She is so perfect.
96
00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:35,121
Keep dreaming.
97
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,832
What's up, Reggie Ray?
98
00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:40,418
I can't wait until Friday's game.
99
00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:45,173
What about your head? You have
a blood clot the size of a grapefruit.
100
00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:49,469
Five more concussions and you'll die.
You should take it easy.
101
00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:52,722
- Don't listen to him.
- Austin.
102
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:57,936
Mr. Not-First-String-Anymore,
isn't first-string anymore.
103
00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:02,482
We know what happened last time
Jake called the plays.
104
00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:05,860
And now, our hometown hero...
105
00:08:06,069 --> 00:08:09,406
...first-string quarterback,
Jake Wyler!
106
00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:12,993
Malik, could you hold these books?
107
00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:16,037
Sure. Why not?
I am the token black guy.
108
00:08:16,246 --> 00:08:18,748
I smile, stay out of
the conversation...
109
00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:24,462
...and say things like "Damn,"
"Shit," and "That is whack!"
110
00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:44,983
What's she doing here?
She graduated four years ago.
111
00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:48,570
- Hi, Jake.
- Catherine.
112
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:50,447
Can I ask you a question?
113
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:53,950
Why is it when I tell a guy
to put it anywhere...
114
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:57,162
-...they always stick it in my ass?
- Damn!
115
00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:59,539
Way too much information.
116
00:08:59,748 --> 00:09:04,085
Oh, no. Too much information
would be telling you...
117
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:07,255
...that after they're done
I take a huge dump.
118
00:09:07,422 --> 00:09:08,465
Shit!
119
00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:12,343
On their chest.
120
00:09:12,802 --> 00:09:14,763
Oh, that is whack!
121
00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,614
Priscilla, there you are.
122
00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:34,949
Jake, I need some
T-to-the-fourth-power-Y.
123
00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:39,746
Some time to talk to you.
124
00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:44,292
God.
125
00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:47,754
It made sense to me, Priscilla.
126
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:53,760
You're leaving me for this guy?
127
00:09:53,968 --> 00:09:57,263
I'm sorry, Jake.
We met over spring break.
128
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,019
I'm not ordinary.
129
00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:06,356
You're leaving me for this guy?
130
00:10:06,564 --> 00:10:08,525
His name is Les...
131
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:12,320
...and he's the most beautiful thing
I've ever seen.
132
00:10:15,323 --> 00:10:17,033
And so is his bag.
133
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:50,024
Janey Briggs,
please report to the office.
134
00:10:50,191 --> 00:10:52,318
Janey Briggs,
please report to the office.
135
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:58,533
Being a foreign exchange student
is scary...
136
00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:01,536
...adjusting to a new school,
a new country.
137
00:11:01,744 --> 00:11:05,373
But you'll find that the students
are very accepting.
138
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,336
You have a sunny disposition.
139
00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:13,673
You got your schedule?
140
00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,642
Well, isn't that wonderful?
141
00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:27,103
Janey, come in.
142
00:11:27,645 --> 00:11:30,773
This is Areola,
our foreign exchange student.
143
00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:33,943
Janey will show you
to your first class.
144
00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:36,487
Hi.
145
00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:43,870
I like your backpack.
146
00:11:49,834 --> 00:11:54,505
Dude, I heard there's an undercover
reporter posing as a student.
147
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:56,799
Dude, no way, dude.
148
00:11:57,008 --> 00:12:00,345
Do you know where
Mr. Keller's English class is?
149
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:03,890
- Down the hall, on your left.
- Sweet, dude.
150
00:12:04,682 --> 00:12:08,519
For the thousandth time, I said,
"Swallow that thing."
151
00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,563
Am I right?
152
00:12:14,817 --> 00:12:18,112
How could Priscilla dump me,
Jake Wyler?
153
00:12:18,321 --> 00:12:20,281
Who does she think she is?
154
00:12:20,490 --> 00:12:22,742
I got two words for you, Jake:
155
00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:26,246
Prom queen, material.
156
00:12:27,372 --> 00:12:29,624
Austin, she's an illusion.
157
00:12:29,832 --> 00:12:33,127
You take away the makeup,
the clothes...
158
00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:37,215
...the way she wears her hair,
the smell of her perfume...
159
00:12:37,465 --> 00:12:40,551
...that cute face she makes
when she's tonguing my balls...
160
00:12:43,721 --> 00:12:45,306
Look, she's replaceable.
161
00:12:45,515 --> 00:12:48,643
Given the right look,
the right boyfriend...
162
00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:52,313
-...any girl could be prom queen.
- I smell a bet.
163
00:12:52,522 --> 00:12:55,191
Jakey,Jakey,
about to make a big...
164
00:12:55,733 --> 00:12:57,527
...mistakey.
165
00:12:57,735 --> 00:13:01,239
I'll pick the most
hopeless girl at this school...
166
00:13:01,447 --> 00:13:05,076
...and I'll bet that you
can't turn her into prom queen.
167
00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:06,911
You're on, Austin.
168
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,080
I'll bet you lose that bet...
169
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:12,917
...but learn a much more
valuable lesson, and win.
170
00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:14,377
In life, that is.
171
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:16,921
You're both on.
172
00:13:17,672 --> 00:13:19,048
All right.
173
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:23,886
Let's find you a prom queen,
Mr. Let's-Find-Me-A-Prom-Queen.
174
00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:26,014
What about her?
175
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:28,266
Baby's got back.
Hunch, that is.
176
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:31,060
No, way too easy.
177
00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:33,896
I have no pigment
178
00:13:34,063 --> 00:13:35,773
Any girl with a guitar is hot.
179
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,525
I need sunscreen
180
00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:40,987
Even a hippie albino.
She could be prom queen.
181
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:43,406
What about the Fratelli sisters?
182
00:13:43,990 --> 00:13:46,909
So they're slightly disfigured
and connected.
183
00:13:47,118 --> 00:13:51,039
But combined, those two make up
one pretty decent chick.
184
00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:53,416
- I'd do them!
- I know, Reggie Ray.
185
00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:56,961
I'm looking for somebody
really messed up.
186
00:13:57,170 --> 00:14:00,006
I'm talking about a real shitbomb.
187
00:14:04,260 --> 00:14:07,680
Well, bombs away.
188
00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:12,810
No, no, no, anyone but her!
Not Janey Briggs.
189
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:16,606
Guys, she's got glasses
and a ponytail.
190
00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:19,984
She's got paint on her overalls!
What is that?
191
00:14:20,151 --> 00:14:22,653
There's no way
she could be prom queen.
192
00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:26,324
Damn, that shit's whack.
193
00:14:27,742 --> 00:14:29,494
Aim for the head!
194
00:14:43,674 --> 00:14:46,594
Can you imagine
what they do in there?
195
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:48,262
Holy cow.
196
00:14:48,471 --> 00:14:51,808
Guys, get your heads
out of the gutter.
197
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:55,144
It's a locker room.
It's no sexier in there...
198
00:14:55,353 --> 00:14:56,979
...than it is in here.
199
00:14:57,271 --> 00:15:00,525
Molly, can you help me
take off my panties?
200
00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:03,945
Hold on, I've got lotion
on my hands.
201
00:15:04,153 --> 00:15:07,240
That's okay.
You can just use your mouth.
202
00:15:15,581 --> 00:15:17,041
Thanks, Miss Peters.
203
00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:18,751
So...
204
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:22,839
...who would like to share their poem
with the class?
205
00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:28,136
Mr. Keller? Over here.
Right here. Please.
206
00:15:28,344 --> 00:15:29,387
Anyone?
207
00:15:29,595 --> 00:15:31,973
Please pick me.
I'm the one.
208
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,349
Yes...
209
00:15:34,058 --> 00:15:35,518
...Ricky.
210
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:47,572
-"Ten Things I Love About Janey."
- Oh, not again.
211
00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,240
By Ricky Lipman.
212
00:15:50,575 --> 00:15:54,662
I love it when Janey talks
I love it when Janey walks
213
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:59,625
I love it when Janey drinks
I love it when Janey blinks
214
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:02,628
I love it when Janey says hi
215
00:16:03,045 --> 00:16:06,924
I love it when Janey says
"See you in English"
216
00:16:10,428 --> 00:16:12,972
I love following Janey to the mall
217
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:20,104
And I love collecting strands
218
00:16:20,271 --> 00:16:21,856
Of Janey's hair
219
00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:24,567
And rolling them up
220
00:16:24,734 --> 00:16:29,489
Into little Janey hairballs
221
00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:45,546
Thank you, Ricky,
for that interesting poem.
222
00:16:47,089 --> 00:16:51,135
- I'm not sure we should be doing this.
- Quiet. I hear them.
223
00:16:51,761 --> 00:16:54,555
I can't believe
what we just did, Molly.
224
00:16:54,764 --> 00:16:59,602
It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience
that will never happen again.
225
00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:00,978
Shit, we missed it.
226
00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:02,188
Let's keep going.
227
00:17:04,106 --> 00:17:07,109
Hey, I found a buffalo nickel!
228
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:14,116
Jackpot
229
00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:17,578
Girl go pee-pee
not what I want to see-see.
230
00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:18,955
I agree-gree.
231
00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:23,000
Would you two please try and be
a little open-minded?
232
00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:28,923
Class, let's open our books
and continue with our poetry lesson.
233
00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:30,550
You know what I think about poetry?
234
00:17:34,679 --> 00:17:37,890
Oh, is that amusing?
235
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:41,644
Is that what your generation
considers humor?
236
00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:52,655
This make me kind of happy in pants.
237
00:17:58,619 --> 00:17:59,954
Goodness.
238
00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:03,332
That make me kind of sad in pants.
239
00:18:04,208 --> 00:18:07,086
Shakespeare, Moliere...
240
00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:10,006
...Oscar Wilde.
241
00:18:10,214 --> 00:18:11,882
These were humorists.
242
00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:15,803
I'm gonna be sick.
243
00:18:16,012 --> 00:18:20,516
The sublime poetic genius
of a clever turn of phrase.
244
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,685
That is true comedy.
245
00:18:23,394 --> 00:18:24,854
Heavens to Betsy.
246
00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:32,445
Your modern, moronic, feeble-minded,
sophomoric excuse for wit...
247
00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,575
...is merely a parade of nasty...
248
00:18:38,993 --> 00:18:40,161
...filthy, vulgar...
249
00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:44,248
...human excrement!
250
00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:00,389
Excuse me.
251
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:16,113
- Hey, Janey. What's up?
- Excuse me?
252
00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:20,117
Ever want to be
the most popular girl in school?
253
00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:22,328
Anorexic, superficial?
254
00:19:22,536 --> 00:19:24,664
A whore who lacks any real
long-term goals?
255
00:19:26,290 --> 00:19:27,750
Exactly.
256
00:19:27,958 --> 00:19:31,712
If you're interested,
I thought we could go out sometime.
257
00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:33,214
Be seen in public.
258
00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:37,760
- We haven't spoken in four years.
- Actually, more like six.
259
00:19:38,094 --> 00:19:41,347
That time when we were
in line at that theater...
260
00:19:41,555 --> 00:19:44,225
...I was actually saying "hey"
to the person behind you.
261
00:19:52,316 --> 00:19:56,028
We're down a cheerleader for Friday's
game against North Compton...
262
00:19:56,237 --> 00:19:58,406
...and that squad always tries
to bring it.
263
00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:01,742
- Bring what, Priscilla?
- Bring it.
264
00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,202
Right, but What is "it"?
265
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:04,495
Right, but What is "it"?
266
00:20:04,870 --> 00:20:07,331
It's just what they bring, okay?
267
00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:21,554
New girl.
268
00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:27,351
I'm Sandy Sue.
It is simply swell to meet all of you.
269
00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:30,438
Peachy.
You brought a routine?
270
00:20:30,646 --> 00:20:31,939
Oh, you bet.
271
00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:35,985
Give me an H
Give me a U
272
00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:40,740
Give me a giant pussy-licking,
ass-fucker cock shit!
273
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:47,830
I'm sorry.
That was my Tourette's.
274
00:20:49,123 --> 00:20:50,875
I don't know about her.
275
00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:55,880
Okay. Let's get one thing straight.
This isn't a cheerocracy.
276
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:57,590
I am the cheertator.
277
00:20:57,798 --> 00:21:01,719
I make the cheercisions,
I will deal with the cheeronsequences.
278
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:06,599
If there are no more cheeruptions,
we can cheertinue.
279
00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:08,893
Thank you.
280
00:21:12,563 --> 00:21:15,524
Grandpa stuck a finger in my ass!
Cum face!
281
00:21:17,526 --> 00:21:20,321
She'll cheer do.
Great.
282
00:21:21,822 --> 00:21:24,617
Goddamn it, let's go now!
Thirty-two draw!
283
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:28,287
Goddamn it!
Let's show some goddamn hustle!
284
00:21:28,496 --> 00:21:32,041
Look alive out there!
This isn't a goddamn tryout!
285
00:21:32,249 --> 00:21:34,627
- Goddamn it!
- Blue 21! Hut!
286
00:21:34,835 --> 00:21:36,337
What the hell?
287
00:21:36,587 --> 00:21:39,006
Nobody's covering that hole!
288
00:21:39,215 --> 00:21:42,051
Goddamn it!
Let's do it again!
289
00:21:43,427 --> 00:21:46,388
Marty! Marty! Marty!
290
00:21:47,139 --> 00:21:49,391
All right, Marty.
291
00:21:51,393 --> 00:21:53,896
- Get your ass in there.
- You sure?
292
00:21:54,104 --> 00:21:56,524
Just go, goddamn it.
293
00:21:56,732 --> 00:21:58,943
Wyler, we got this wrapped up.
294
00:21:59,151 --> 00:22:02,446
All you gotta do is run out the clock.
295
00:22:05,199 --> 00:22:08,035
For God's sakes,
don't try anything fancy!
296
00:22:08,244 --> 00:22:09,787
Goddamn it.
297
00:22:12,623 --> 00:22:14,416
Listen, boys.
298
00:22:14,625 --> 00:22:17,086
We got time for one more play.
299
00:22:17,294 --> 00:22:20,589
- I say we get the ball to Marty.
- Damn.
300
00:22:20,798 --> 00:22:23,592
No, I'm just happy
being on the field.
301
00:22:23,801 --> 00:22:28,222
Coach reckons we should take a knee.
We're up 42-0.
302
00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:30,599
I don't care what coach reckons.
303
00:22:30,850 --> 00:22:33,394
You can't go through life
being scared.
304
00:22:33,602 --> 00:22:36,939
If you do, you'll always wonder,
"What if?"
305
00:22:37,606 --> 00:22:41,402
But if you go out there
and you give it your all...
306
00:22:41,777 --> 00:22:42,862
...that's heroic.
307
00:22:45,948 --> 00:22:47,950
Guys, I appreciate this, but--
308
00:22:48,158 --> 00:22:50,452
That's the spirit! Ready?
309
00:22:56,041 --> 00:22:58,752
What are you doing?
Get out of here.
310
00:22:59,003 --> 00:23:00,588
Not here. Down there.
311
00:23:00,796 --> 00:23:01,881
Over here?
312
00:23:02,089 --> 00:23:04,174
What are you doing?
Over here!
313
00:23:04,717 --> 00:23:05,801
Here?
314
00:23:06,927 --> 00:23:08,345
We love you, Marty!
315
00:23:08,554 --> 00:23:10,139
Set, hut!
316
00:23:20,983 --> 00:23:22,026
No. No.
317
00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:25,487
No, don't throw it to me.
318
00:23:26,989 --> 00:23:28,365
No!
319
00:23:54,391 --> 00:23:57,895
- Nice hands, Marty!
- I did it.
320
00:23:58,771 --> 00:24:00,773
- I'm a hero!
- Walk it off!
321
00:24:02,066 --> 00:24:05,694
All right, goddamn it!
Hit the showers, goddamn it!
322
00:24:06,195 --> 00:24:09,156
Bunch of candy-asses.
Lousy practice!
323
00:24:09,365 --> 00:24:12,117
We'll get our asses kicked Friday!
324
00:24:12,326 --> 00:24:15,663
What about fourth-string?
I didn't get to practice.
325
00:24:15,871 --> 00:24:19,708
After all the shenanigans
you pulled last season...
326
00:24:19,917 --> 00:24:24,171
...thank God you're still
in goddamn uniform, goddamn it!
327
00:24:48,779 --> 00:24:53,033
If my parents hear I got detention,
no dessert for a week.
328
00:24:53,242 --> 00:24:55,327
We've disgraced ourselves
and our families.
329
00:24:55,536 --> 00:25:01,583
Guys, guys, guys. I sense the morale's
a little low. I say we make a pact...
330
00:25:02,084 --> 00:25:04,003
...right here, right now.
331
00:25:04,211 --> 00:25:07,464
Before the end of the year,
we all get laid!
332
00:25:08,048 --> 00:25:09,883
We always make that pact.
333
00:25:10,092 --> 00:25:13,012
We've been waiting for this
since puberty.
334
00:25:13,220 --> 00:25:16,640
- Two weeks ago!
- I just got first hair on ball.
335
00:25:17,224 --> 00:25:19,768
I don't think you understand.
336
00:25:20,227 --> 00:25:23,564
We'll become the masters of our
sexualdesfiny.
337
00:25:23,772 --> 00:25:26,942
No longer will our penises remain
flaccid and unused.
338
00:25:28,110 --> 00:25:30,279
No longer steal Grandfather's porn.
339
00:25:30,487 --> 00:25:34,658
No longer will we use blindfolds
when we jerk each other off.
340
00:25:35,117 --> 00:25:36,952
All right, that's it.
341
00:25:40,914 --> 00:25:42,708
What in God's name is going on?
342
00:25:43,667 --> 00:25:46,045
- What was that ruckus?
- I no hear ruckus.
343
00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:50,424
- I heard a ruckus.
- Can you describe this ruckus, sir?
344
00:25:50,632 --> 00:25:53,385
You better watch your tongue,
young man!
345
00:25:53,594 --> 00:25:55,471
We were just sitting here.
346
00:25:55,679 --> 00:25:58,724
You just bought yourself
another detention.
347
00:25:58,932 --> 00:26:01,769
- That's not fair.
- Cry me a river, dickface.
348
00:26:01,977 --> 00:26:04,855
- You bought another one.
- Eat my shorts.
349
00:26:05,397 --> 00:26:06,732
What was that?
350
00:26:06,940 --> 00:26:10,152
Eat my shorts!
351
00:26:10,360 --> 00:26:13,113
- Don't mess with a bull.
- I'm shaking.
352
00:26:13,322 --> 00:26:14,990
- You got another.
- Good!
353
00:26:15,199 --> 00:26:17,785
- You through?
- Not even close, bud.
354
00:26:17,993 --> 00:26:19,787
- Want another one?
- Yes.
355
00:26:19,995 --> 00:26:21,997
- You got it!
- Good.
356
00:26:22,247 --> 00:26:24,166
- Another one. Had enough?
- No.
357
00:26:24,416 --> 00:26:25,626
- Another one.
- So?
358
00:26:25,834 --> 00:26:27,795
- I can keep going.
- Go!
359
00:26:28,003 --> 00:26:30,172
- Eenie, meenie, minie--
- Mo.
360
00:26:30,380 --> 00:26:31,673
- Your morn was a--
- Ho.
361
00:26:31,882 --> 00:26:33,509
- He was a famous clown.
- Bobo.
362
00:26:33,759 --> 00:26:36,053
Mitch, cut it out.
363
00:26:38,222 --> 00:26:40,182
- Another one.
- But I was--
364
00:26:40,390 --> 00:26:41,683
That's another one!
365
00:26:41,892 --> 00:26:44,686
- One more for Ox or for Mitch?
- Another.
366
00:26:45,312 --> 00:26:47,606
- I confused.
- Shut your hole, Wang Chung.
367
00:26:47,815 --> 00:26:51,735
I got you for the rest of your lives.
You're mine.
368
00:26:52,152 --> 00:26:54,279
- Next time, I'm cracking skulls.
- I'm cracking skulls.
369
00:27:10,379 --> 00:27:14,174
How many times have I said
I'm not going to Princeton?
370
00:27:14,424 --> 00:27:16,260
I'm not pressuring you.
371
00:27:16,718 --> 00:27:18,387
Just give it four years.
372
00:27:18,595 --> 00:27:21,932
If you don't like it,
you can work at my firm.
373
00:27:22,141 --> 00:27:24,935
I don't want your life!
374
00:27:25,519 --> 00:27:26,770
That's okay, son.
375
00:27:26,979 --> 00:27:29,439
I heard about what happened
with Priscilla.
376
00:27:30,023 --> 00:27:31,275
The good news is...
377
00:27:31,483 --> 00:27:34,027
...I've got the perfect rebound girl.
378
00:27:34,278 --> 00:27:35,571
Really?
379
00:27:36,864 --> 00:27:39,616
Beverly! Could you come in here?
380
00:27:45,873 --> 00:27:46,999
That's Mom!
381
00:27:47,207 --> 00:27:48,250
What do you say, kiddo?
382
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:52,337
I'm gonna leave you two alone.
383
00:27:55,549 --> 00:27:56,967
Make me proud, son.
384
00:27:57,676 --> 00:27:59,761
So you in love?
385
00:28:02,347 --> 00:28:06,101
- Yeah, I think I am.
- Well, who is this guy?
386
00:28:06,310 --> 00:28:10,272
His name is Blane. He's a senior.
He's so beautiful.
387
00:28:16,028 --> 00:28:18,530
Janey? Sweetheart?
388
00:28:21,867 --> 00:28:23,202
Hi, Daddy.
389
00:28:23,410 --> 00:28:26,079
Is something wrong?
You were quiet at dinner.
390
00:28:26,622 --> 00:28:28,582
You were passed out on the table.
391
00:28:34,796 --> 00:28:36,381
Listen, honey...
392
00:28:37,007 --> 00:28:41,011
...I may not always be coherent
or conscious...
393
00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:45,390
...but I know when my girl's
got something on her mind.
394
00:28:46,058 --> 00:28:48,185
Well, there is this popular boy,
Jakenu
395
00:28:48,936 --> 00:28:52,147
Oh, sweetie.
396
00:28:54,191 --> 00:28:55,943
Jake knocked you up, didn't he?
397
00:28:56,902 --> 00:28:58,654
No, he asked me out.
398
00:29:00,489 --> 00:29:03,617
Do you like him?
Are you attracted to him?
399
00:29:04,159 --> 00:29:06,620
I mean, would you give him head?
400
00:29:06,828 --> 00:29:09,665
He is kind of cute, but...
401
00:29:09,873 --> 00:29:12,251
...he's always been a total jerk.
402
00:29:12,459 --> 00:29:14,962
It's weird that he's
talking to me now.
403
00:29:15,170 --> 00:29:19,007
Especially after you've packed on
a couple of pounds.
404
00:29:23,178 --> 00:29:24,972
What do you think I should do?
405
00:29:25,889 --> 00:29:27,557
Look, sweetie.
406
00:29:27,766 --> 00:29:32,312
I never want you to do anything
that compromises who you are...
407
00:29:32,521 --> 00:29:35,857
...because you're very,
very special to me.
408
00:29:36,066 --> 00:29:40,028
If Jake is only asking you out
to get into your pants...
409
00:29:40,529 --> 00:29:41,989
...well, then I'd say...
410
00:29:42,864 --> 00:29:43,949
...go out with him.
411
00:29:44,825 --> 00:29:48,370
You could certainly use
the popularity points.
412
00:29:48,787 --> 00:29:50,580
And if Jake likes you...
413
00:29:50,831 --> 00:29:55,294
...then maybe those kids will quit
throwing bags of shit on the porch.
414
00:30:01,508 --> 00:30:03,176
I feel better.
415
00:30:05,762 --> 00:30:07,306
Thanks for the advice, Daddy.
416
00:30:09,391 --> 00:30:11,935
That's what I'm here for,
pumpkin-tits.
417
00:30:19,693 --> 00:30:22,779
- I need to ask you a favor.
- It's about time.
418
00:30:23,238 --> 00:30:24,364
No, not that.
419
00:30:27,034 --> 00:30:29,995
You're the cruelest girl
in high school.
420
00:30:30,203 --> 00:30:32,706
You're the only one who can help
trick Janey into liking me.
421
00:30:34,624 --> 00:30:38,170
That girl with the glasses
and the ponytail?
422
00:30:38,378 --> 00:30:40,797
Don't forget
the paint-covered overalls.
423
00:30:42,507 --> 00:30:43,884
Well...
424
00:30:45,010 --> 00:30:47,763
...it's going to be difficult.
425
00:30:48,305 --> 00:30:50,265
But I think I can help you.
426
00:30:50,974 --> 00:30:52,476
Sit.
427
00:30:55,687 --> 00:30:57,314
For a price.
428
00:30:59,483 --> 00:31:02,277
And this time,
I don't want your car.
429
00:31:04,404 --> 00:31:06,114
I want you.
430
00:31:06,406 --> 00:31:09,951
Catherine, that's disgusting.
You're my sister.
431
00:31:10,202 --> 00:31:11,870
Only by blood.
432
00:31:12,913 --> 00:31:18,460
- What is wrong with this family?
- Hey, do you want my help or not?
433
00:31:31,264 --> 00:31:33,892
There are three things
you need to do...
434
00:31:34,059 --> 00:31:36,478
...to have Janey
eating out of your hand.
435
00:31:38,397 --> 00:31:40,315
First, you earn her trust.
436
00:31:40,524 --> 00:31:42,067
Come on, leave him alone!
437
00:31:42,442 --> 00:31:46,822
Hey! Come on, guys, back off.
That's enough, okay?
438
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:51,952
You little shit.
439
00:32:03,547 --> 00:32:05,298
Don't you guys mess with him again.
440
00:32:06,466 --> 00:32:10,846
Once you've got her trust,
it's time to make her feel special.
441
00:32:11,930 --> 00:32:15,517
Pick a song with her name in it.
That always works.
442
00:32:33,535 --> 00:32:35,579
Janey's got a gun
443
00:32:36,830 --> 00:32:38,373
Janey Briggs' got a gun
444
00:32:38,540 --> 00:32:41,418
She's got a gun!
JaneYs- got a gun!
445
00:32:41,877 --> 00:32:43,336
What?
446
00:32:44,921 --> 00:32:46,965
Janey Briggs' got a gun
447
00:32:47,632 --> 00:32:51,845
So run away
Run away from the pain
448
00:32:52,429 --> 00:32:53,597
Take it easy, miss.
449
00:32:53,805 --> 00:32:56,266
- Wait.
- Get back here!
450
00:32:56,933 --> 00:32:59,311
Run away from the pain
451
00:32:59,936 --> 00:33:01,188
Hold her down.
452
00:33:03,899 --> 00:33:07,152
- Give me your hand!
- Just give us the gun, Janey.
453
00:33:07,986 --> 00:33:10,489
After you've made her feel special...
454
00:33:11,448 --> 00:33:14,451
...it's time to put the icing
on the cake.
455
00:33:14,659 --> 00:33:17,245
I'm really glad you showed up, Janey.
456
00:33:17,454 --> 00:33:22,250
The only reason I came here
was to tell you to leave me alone.
457
00:33:22,501 --> 00:33:25,504
You know, I was just making a snack.
458
00:33:25,754 --> 00:33:27,464
You want one?
459
00:33:28,131 --> 00:33:32,010
- No. Listen, Jake--
- I'll be right back.
460
00:33:32,802 --> 00:33:33,845
But I--
461
00:34:09,381 --> 00:34:10,799
HurlQW?
462
00:34:13,927 --> 00:34:15,387
I don't like sundaes.
463
00:34:15,637 --> 00:34:19,057
It's not a sundae,
it's a banana split.
464
00:34:21,685 --> 00:34:25,230
I don't like those, either.
Goodbye, Jake.
465
00:34:40,453 --> 00:34:43,415
I left some money
on the kitchen counter.
466
00:34:43,623 --> 00:34:46,042
Emergency numbers are by the phone.
467
00:34:46,251 --> 00:34:48,753
And remember, son:
No parties.
468
00:34:49,004 --> 00:34:50,213
I know, Dad.
469
00:34:50,589 --> 00:34:52,382
Keg coming through.
Hey.
470
00:34:53,091 --> 00:34:54,384
What's up, man?
471
00:34:54,593 --> 00:34:56,595
We're trusting you, Preston.
472
00:34:56,803 --> 00:35:01,057
- Where do you want the speakers?
- In the dining room.
473
00:35:01,266 --> 00:35:03,518
You guys should hit the road.
474
00:35:03,727 --> 00:35:06,313
I'm taking your Ferrari
to buy hookers.
475
00:35:06,521 --> 00:35:09,149
We'll call you later to check in.
476
00:35:09,357 --> 00:35:11,943
I'll be so high,
I won't know where the phone is.
477
00:35:12,569 --> 00:35:14,362
That's my boy.
478
00:35:17,741 --> 00:35:19,993
Jake, what are you doing here?
479
00:35:20,201 --> 00:35:22,871
I'm taking you to Preston's big party.
480
00:35:23,455 --> 00:35:24,539
I can't.
481
00:35:24,748 --> 00:35:28,918
I'm not dressed to go to a party.
I'm a complete mess.
482
00:35:29,127 --> 00:35:32,714
I'd say you're one big fucking
train wreck.
483
00:35:36,801 --> 00:35:38,345
Do I know you?
484
00:35:54,235 --> 00:35:56,863
That's it. I've got it.
485
00:35:57,989 --> 00:35:59,199
What?
486
00:35:59,407 --> 00:36:02,410
It might seem crazy,
but you'll have to trust me.
487
00:36:31,231 --> 00:36:32,524
That's it.
488
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:35,527
I did it. I'm a miracle worker.
489
00:36:39,030 --> 00:36:40,657
Gentlemen...
490
00:36:40,865 --> 00:36:43,993
...may I present to you
the new and improved...
491
00:36:44,452 --> 00:36:45,537
...Janey Briggs-
492
00:37:21,406 --> 00:37:25,577
Congratulations. You just got
your first slow-motion entrance.
493
00:37:47,932 --> 00:37:49,392
I'm okay!
494
00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:51,561
Janey?
495
00:37:53,563 --> 00:37:57,192
Come on out of there, honey.
Quit farting around.
496
00:38:06,075 --> 00:38:08,953
- Got your mom's car keys?
- Check.
497
00:38:11,122 --> 00:38:12,749
- Sleeping bags.
- Check.
498
00:38:12,957 --> 00:38:14,000
- Condoms.
- Check.
499
00:38:14,167 --> 00:38:19,339
Three pubescent libidos to take us
on a series of wild adventures.
500
00:38:19,547 --> 00:38:21,883
Check! Road trip!
501
00:38:37,273 --> 00:38:38,483
We here.
502
00:38:38,983 --> 00:38:42,987
Gentlemen, tonight we go to our
first high-school party.
503
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:46,783
This is the place to buzz the Brillo.
504
00:38:46,991 --> 00:38:49,077
How you plan on buzzing Brillo?
505
00:38:49,953 --> 00:38:54,123
With this letter.
Amanda Becker will know the truth:
506
00:38:54,332 --> 00:38:57,043
I've loved her since I first saw her.
507
00:38:58,253 --> 00:38:59,587
Welcome to the party.
508
00:38:59,796 --> 00:39:03,299
If you're going to have sex,
do it in my parents' bedroom.
509
00:39:05,176 --> 00:39:09,556
- Does she go to our school?
- It's not even the same person.
510
00:39:09,764 --> 00:39:12,475
Janey-stainey-stained-pants-overalls?
511
00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:14,936
How did you talk me into this?
512
00:39:15,144 --> 00:39:19,858
Priscilla's freaking out now that Janey's
lost her glasses and her ponytail.
513
00:39:20,024 --> 00:39:23,236
I'm going to go fuck
a complete stranger.
514
00:39:23,444 --> 00:39:26,322
- Hey, I'm a complete stranger.
- I'm a complete stranger.
515
00:39:28,825 --> 00:39:32,328
Relax, all right?
It's going to be okay.
516
00:39:32,871 --> 00:39:33,913
Nice turtleneck.
517
00:39:34,122 --> 00:39:36,040
What's your name?
518
00:39:36,249 --> 00:39:39,586
I'm Sandy Sue.
Limp-dick fag fucker!
519
00:39:39,794 --> 00:39:41,838
Who told you that?
Alison?
520
00:39:42,088 --> 00:39:44,799
Alison was bitter when we broke up.
521
00:39:45,008 --> 00:39:49,512
- Completely fake.
- Yeah, that's not her real hair color.
522
00:39:49,721 --> 00:39:53,892
- She's wearing the same outfit as me.
- It looks much better on you.
523
00:39:54,601 --> 00:39:56,978
Where is she?
I thought she'd be here by now.
524
00:40:06,696 --> 00:40:08,364
What's going on?
525
00:40:09,449 --> 00:40:14,579
We can't talk
until she starts moving again.
526
00:40:19,542 --> 00:40:21,336
She took forever this time.
527
00:40:30,762 --> 00:40:32,513
What are you doing here?
528
00:40:35,224 --> 00:40:36,476
What do you mean?
529
00:40:36,684 --> 00:40:40,438
I'm supposed to be the only black guy
at this party.
530
00:40:41,606 --> 00:40:45,401
- Damn. Shit.
- Yeah, I know.
531
00:40:45,568 --> 00:40:46,694
- It's whack.
- It's whack.
532
00:40:46,861 --> 00:40:47,904
Hey, man, my bad.
533
00:40:48,112 --> 00:40:49,906
- Take this.
- Thanks.
534
00:40:50,114 --> 00:40:51,491
Do your thing.
535
00:40:52,116 --> 00:40:55,370
- Peace out, brother.
- Honest mistake.
536
00:41:03,336 --> 00:41:06,089
Hi, my name is Catherine.
537
00:41:06,756 --> 00:41:11,094
Yeah, I know.
We just had sex five minutes ago.
538
00:41:15,723 --> 00:41:17,976
Not scoring any cock, either?
539
00:41:18,184 --> 00:41:22,230
Cock? I've never even been kissed.
540
00:41:25,441 --> 00:41:29,862
What up, my yellow brothers?
Chinks in the house!
541
00:41:39,872 --> 00:41:44,043
Reggie Ray, have you
seen Janey anywhere?
542
00:41:44,961 --> 00:41:47,839
It's a good night for smoking.
543
00:41:48,047 --> 00:41:50,299
Ain't that right, Sausage?
544
00:41:57,932 --> 00:42:01,602
Okay, now close your eyes
and wet your lips.
545
00:42:01,853 --> 00:42:05,440
- Are you for real?
- Do you want to learn or not?
546
00:42:06,983 --> 00:42:08,568
I guess.
547
00:42:19,871 --> 00:42:25,209
- See? That wasn't so scary.
- It was nothing.
548
00:42:26,627 --> 00:42:28,046
0K8)'-
549
00:42:29,172 --> 00:42:31,174
Let's try again.
550
00:42:31,883 --> 00:42:35,470
Only this time, I'm gonna
stick my tongue in your mouth.
551
00:42:36,512 --> 00:42:41,059
And when I do that, I want you
to massage my tongue with yours.
552
00:42:41,267 --> 00:42:45,688
- And that's what first base is.
- Okay.
553
00:42:45,980 --> 00:42:47,690
Eyes closed.
554
00:43:13,049 --> 00:43:15,218
That was cool.
555
00:43:17,512 --> 00:43:18,554
Now...
556
00:43:19,388 --> 00:43:21,974
...have you ever eaten pussy before?
557
00:43:25,228 --> 00:43:28,147
You call this a party?
558
00:43:28,356 --> 00:43:30,942
I'm a golden goddess!
559
00:43:31,150 --> 00:43:34,028
- Show us how drunk you are!
- Go for it!
560
00:43:40,451 --> 00:43:42,662
You're a unique rebel, Janey!
561
00:43:43,412 --> 00:43:45,289
Janey, are you all right?
562
00:43:46,207 --> 00:43:51,295
- I told you not to let me drink.
- I gave you a nonalcoholic beer.
563
00:43:55,758 --> 00:43:57,385
What the hell are you doing here?
564
00:43:57,593 --> 00:43:59,887
L-- I was invited.
565
00:44:00,096 --> 00:44:04,934
Look, you may have lost those glasses
and that ponytail thing...
566
00:44:05,143 --> 00:44:08,104
...but you're still a loser.
567
00:44:13,818 --> 00:44:17,029
Look at that. Oh, my God.
568
00:44:17,280 --> 00:44:19,490
That's going to stain.
569
00:44:24,620 --> 00:44:26,789
You're not going to cry now, are you?
570
00:45:09,916 --> 00:45:14,045
Look, you can't just start
a slow clap at any old time.
571
00:45:14,253 --> 00:45:15,755
You gotta wait for the right moment.
572
00:45:16,214 --> 00:45:19,967
But how am I going to know
when it's the right moment?
573
00:45:22,803 --> 00:45:23,971
You'll know.
574
00:45:37,068 --> 00:45:39,237
Nobody's allowed down here.
575
00:45:39,737 --> 00:45:41,447
Janey, I just thought--
576
00:45:41,656 --> 00:45:44,909
How did you get in here?
I deadbolted the door.
577
00:45:46,410 --> 00:45:48,371
There's a hole in the side
of your house.
578
00:45:54,377 --> 00:45:55,419
Who's that?
579
00:45:56,504 --> 00:45:59,924
- It's my mother.
- You have her eyes.
580
00:46:02,176 --> 00:46:03,594
She died when I was 6.
581
00:46:05,972 --> 00:46:07,014
I'm sorry.
582
00:46:08,057 --> 00:46:10,309
I remember it like it was yesterday.
583
00:46:11,143 --> 00:46:16,816
Christmas, 1989. Dad had been
fired from the zipper factory.
584
00:46:17,191 --> 00:46:20,069
Mom was pulling in tricks
to make ends meet.
585
00:46:20,319 --> 00:46:22,488
Daniel Day-Lewis won an Oscar
for My Left Foot.
586
00:46:23,906 --> 00:46:27,243
And all I wanted was
a little Betsy Wetsy doll.
587
00:46:27,702 --> 00:46:32,039
I remember those. Push her belly,
she'd piss all over herself.
588
00:46:32,873 --> 00:46:36,085
She said she was going out
to get my dad a bottle of gin...
589
00:46:37,128 --> 00:46:39,547
...but I knew she was going
to get me that present.
590
00:46:41,090 --> 00:46:45,094
It was raining really hard
that night...
591
00:46:45,261 --> 00:46:48,097
...and the roads were slippery.
592
00:46:48,597 --> 00:46:51,934
Oh, God, Janey.
A car accident.
593
00:46:52,143 --> 00:46:54,270
No. Cancer.
594
00:46:57,982 --> 00:47:01,527
I had to take on
all of her responsibilities:
595
00:47:01,736 --> 00:47:05,281
Cooking and cleaning
and breast-feeding Mitch.
596
00:47:05,489 --> 00:47:08,659
It's in the past.
Think about your future.
597
00:47:08,868 --> 00:47:10,536
Look how talented you are.
598
00:47:11,495 --> 00:47:16,083
I have this dream of just hopping
on a plane and going to Paris.
599
00:47:16,292 --> 00:47:19,295
There's an art school,
but I can't afford it.
600
00:47:19,670 --> 00:47:24,050
Unless I raise $26,000
before the admissions cutoff.
601
00:47:24,258 --> 00:47:29,638
My parents give a scholarship to girls
who can't get into art school.
602
00:47:29,930 --> 00:47:31,766
Really? That's amazing.
603
00:47:31,974 --> 00:47:36,312
This year we gave it to Lupe,
the Mexican finger painter.
604
00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:38,564
I think you'd really like her work.
605
00:47:40,191 --> 00:47:43,903
Sometimes I wish my life
was a fairy tale...
606
00:47:44,111 --> 00:47:47,323
...and some guy would come
and take me away.
607
00:48:11,972 --> 00:48:13,432
- I was-- My--
- Yeah--
608
00:48:13,599 --> 00:48:17,978
- My eyes were shut.
- And we couldn't even-- Yeah. Totally.
609
00:48:25,486 --> 00:48:27,905
I'm gonna-- I'm gonna--
610
00:48:28,114 --> 00:48:29,949
- I'm going to g0.
- Okay.
611
00:48:30,866 --> 00:48:33,661
Congratulations to the men
and women nominated for prom queen.
612
00:48:44,588 --> 00:48:48,634
Think you'll be prom queen?
Well, think again, Janey.
613
00:48:48,843 --> 00:48:52,721
You put the "ass" in "embarrassment."
The "boo" in "taboo."
614
00:48:52,888 --> 00:48:55,933
And the "suck" in "liposuction."
615
00:48:59,478 --> 00:49:01,188
Is that the best you can do?
616
00:49:02,648 --> 00:49:03,816
No.
617
00:49:04,567 --> 00:49:07,528
You also put the "brat"
in "bratwurst."
618
00:49:07,945 --> 00:49:10,698
And the "eew" in "jujitsu."
619
00:49:10,865 --> 00:49:15,870
And the "ism" in "This is all
just a defense mechanism."
620
00:49:17,997 --> 00:49:22,376
So I told her, "Take the old lady and
send your mama back."
621
00:49:24,128 --> 00:49:28,924
So you asked your four-eyed
circus freak to the prom yet?
622
00:49:29,175 --> 00:49:31,302
We resent that!
623
00:49:32,595 --> 00:49:34,472
Why don't you just drop it, Austin?
624
00:49:35,890 --> 00:49:40,811
Jake made a few paint stains
in his pants thinking about Janey.
625
00:49:41,604 --> 00:49:43,689
It's just a bet. Okay, man?
626
00:49:45,024 --> 00:49:47,735
You always had a thing
for ugly girls...
627
00:49:47,985 --> 00:49:50,738
...Mr. I-Have-
a-Thing-For-Ugly-Girls.
628
00:49:53,908 --> 00:49:55,409
You mean Janey?
629
00:49:55,618 --> 00:49:59,163
She looks as good
as a dumpster full of gristles.
630
00:49:59,371 --> 00:50:01,081
Bling-bling.
631
00:50:03,501 --> 00:50:05,294
Janey Briggs...
632
00:50:06,086 --> 00:50:07,713
...is hot.
633
00:50:24,813 --> 00:50:27,650
- Hey, Janey.
- Hey, Jake.
634
00:50:27,858 --> 00:50:30,778
I've been doing a lot of thinking...
635
00:50:30,986 --> 00:50:34,281
...and there's something
I want to ask you.
636
00:50:35,991 --> 00:50:38,827
I don't want to make
a big deal of it...
637
00:50:39,078 --> 00:50:42,206
...so I'm just gonna lay it out there,
okay?
638
00:50:44,250 --> 00:50:46,168
Here it is.
639
00:50:48,170 --> 00:50:51,298
See, I don't like making big speeches.
640
00:50:51,549 --> 00:50:55,219
I'm a straight shooter.
I call them like I see them.
641
00:50:55,678 --> 00:50:57,638
What you see is what you get.
642
00:50:58,305 --> 00:51:02,518
Ain't nobody gonna break my stride.
Ain't nobody gonna slow me down.
643
00:51:03,602 --> 00:51:06,939
Jake, are you trying
to ask me to the...?
644
00:51:07,147 --> 00:51:08,190
Yeah.
645
00:51:09,483 --> 00:51:11,569
I'd love to go with you.
646
00:51:16,240 --> 00:51:18,701
Great. Great.
647
00:51:21,829 --> 00:51:23,038
I'll see you in English.
648
00:51:27,710 --> 00:51:30,462
It's time to play some football!
649
00:51:30,879 --> 00:51:35,926
The John Hughes Wasps defend their
title against the North Compton Wildcats.
650
00:51:53,777 --> 00:51:55,404
Goddamn!
651
00:52:02,911 --> 00:52:05,914
That was the fastest first half
of football I've ever seen.
652
00:52:10,878 --> 00:52:14,590
We saw you at our practice.
I know you stole our routine.
653
00:52:14,798 --> 00:52:19,553
I don't know what you mean.
We do our own cheers. Right, girls?
654
00:52:19,762 --> 00:52:20,804
That's right.
655
00:52:21,138 --> 00:52:24,099
Well, then, you better bring it.
656
00:52:24,350 --> 00:52:26,602
Oh, it's already been broughten.
657
00:52:27,144 --> 00:52:29,647
Nice comeback, Priscilla! Yeah!
658
00:52:29,813 --> 00:52:33,108
We are the North Compton Wildcats
659
00:52:33,317 --> 00:52:34,985
We're black, we know it
660
00:52:35,194 --> 00:52:37,321
We shake our big booties and show it
661
00:52:37,529 --> 00:52:39,531
We ain't white
We ain't white
662
00:52:39,782 --> 00:52:42,910
We definitely ain't white
Break it down, niggas
663
00:52:48,749 --> 00:52:51,627
Damn, those bitches represent!
664
00:53:01,720 --> 00:53:03,681
- Reggie Ray.
- I smell a bet.
665
00:53:04,807 --> 00:53:06,183
You all right?
666
00:53:06,517 --> 00:53:09,520
Coach says it's okay
to bleed from the ears.
667
00:53:14,900 --> 00:53:16,652
I got to go back out on the field.
668
00:53:19,363 --> 00:53:22,366
All right. Be careful.
You only have three--
669
00:53:23,325 --> 00:53:26,829
Two concussions left. Reggie Ray.
670
00:53:27,037 --> 00:53:28,622
And we're back.
671
00:53:30,541 --> 00:53:32,418
Let's g0, Wasps!
672
00:53:39,007 --> 00:53:40,759
Blue 33! Set!
673
00:53:43,011 --> 00:53:44,680
That's defense right there.
674
00:53:45,931 --> 00:53:48,058
Say "good day" to Reggie Ray.
675
00:53:50,561 --> 00:53:53,647
Sit down. He got the wind
knocked out of him.
676
00:53:54,273 --> 00:53:57,317
- Come on, Reggie Ray, 96'! up!
- Reggie Ray.
677
00:53:57,484 --> 00:53:59,737
You still have another concussion!
678
00:54:02,948 --> 00:54:03,991
Come on, dog!
679
00:54:04,700 --> 00:54:05,993
It doesn't look good, coach.
680
00:54:07,244 --> 00:54:09,413
- Can he play?
- He's in a coma.
681
00:54:09,580 --> 00:54:12,708
Answer my question! Can he play?
682
00:54:12,916 --> 00:54:15,711
He can't breathe.
We gotta get him to a hospital.
683
00:54:15,878 --> 00:54:17,087
Listen to me right now!
684
00:54:17,504 --> 00:54:22,843
I don't care what you have to do!
He stays in the game, goddamn it!
685
00:54:34,772 --> 00:54:37,733
Holy shit, this motherfucker's heavy.
686
00:54:38,192 --> 00:54:39,485
Blue 15!
687
00:54:42,279 --> 00:54:43,781
Set! Hut!
688
00:54:47,743 --> 00:54:49,870
Goddamn it, Reggie Ray!
689
00:54:50,829 --> 00:54:52,206
Oh, shit.
690
00:55:11,433 --> 00:55:14,478
Wham, barn!
What the fuck just happened?
691
00:55:17,606 --> 00:55:22,319
Okay, Wyler, I've got no choice.
You're the only quarterback I've got.
692
00:55:23,821 --> 00:55:28,075
- I say give the ball to Marty.
- I'm just happy being on the field.
693
00:55:29,034 --> 00:55:32,538
- You'll always wonder, "What if?"
- I'm a hero!
694
00:55:35,374 --> 00:55:37,584
Goddamn it! Get in the game!
695
00:55:37,793 --> 00:55:39,419
You're our only chance!
696
00:55:40,796 --> 00:55:44,842
- You're a pussy, Wyler!
- Do it for Marty's torso!
697
00:55:48,470 --> 00:55:50,180
You got butterflies, huh?
698
00:55:50,556 --> 00:55:51,640
Who are you?
699
00:55:59,398 --> 00:56:00,566
I'm the wise janitor.
700
00:56:01,191 --> 00:56:04,319
I impart knowledge and help
youngsters overcome their fears.
701
00:56:04,528 --> 00:56:06,697
I also replace the urinal cakes.
702
00:56:06,905 --> 00:56:09,616
I'm here to help you
get your throw back.
703
00:56:10,409 --> 00:56:12,327
- How did you--?
- I've been watching.
704
00:56:12,494 --> 00:56:17,207
During practice, in the hallways,
in the lockers, taking a shower...
705
00:56:17,416 --> 00:56:19,293
...whipping boys with a wet towel.
706
00:56:20,294 --> 00:56:25,173
- Can tell you kind of like that.
- Hey! Let's get back to the throw.
707
00:56:25,382 --> 00:56:28,135
What happened to Marty
wasn't your fault.
708
00:56:28,302 --> 00:56:29,344
Really?
709
00:56:29,720 --> 00:56:32,806
Okay, it was.
But you got to get over it.
710
00:56:33,015 --> 00:56:34,516
It could've happened to anybody.
711
00:56:35,559 --> 00:56:38,979
Anybody that disobeyed the coach
and the team...
712
00:56:39,187 --> 00:56:44,151
...and threw to a 90-pound kid
who shouldn't have been on the field.
713
00:56:44,359 --> 00:56:48,238
Stop! How is any of this
supposed to be helping me?
714
00:56:48,447 --> 00:56:50,532
Right. Forget what I said.
715
00:56:50,741 --> 00:56:55,412
You got to go out there, believe
in the ball and throw yourself.
716
00:56:55,746 --> 00:56:57,539
You can do it.
717
00:57:02,419 --> 00:57:04,212
I'm going out there.
718
00:57:10,969 --> 00:57:14,514
Only 25 seconds remaining,
and the fate of the season...
719
00:57:14,723 --> 00:57:19,019
...rests in the hands of fourth-string
quarterback Jake Wyler.
720
00:57:19,227 --> 00:57:22,356
Translation: We're shit out of luck.
721
00:57:22,522 --> 00:57:24,900
- Give me a W!
- W!
722
00:57:25,067 --> 00:57:27,194
- Give me a Y!
- Y!
723
00:57:27,402 --> 00:57:30,656
Give me a--
Lick my pussy ass cock shit!
724
00:57:31,448 --> 00:57:34,076
Lick my pussy ass cock shit!
725
00:57:38,372 --> 00:57:39,539
Blue 83!
726
00:57:39,790 --> 00:57:41,249
Blue 83!
727
00:57:42,459 --> 00:57:44,294
I reckon I'm feeling better.
728
00:57:44,544 --> 00:57:45,879
Set! Hut!
729
00:58:29,840 --> 00:58:31,508
Oh, shit.
730
00:58:45,772 --> 00:58:50,277
That has to be the worst pass
I've ever seen, ever.
731
00:58:52,487 --> 00:58:54,448
What the hell was that?
732
00:59:22,559 --> 00:59:24,311
Jake?
733
00:59:26,396 --> 00:59:27,939
Jake.
734
00:59:29,566 --> 00:59:30,776
Hey-
735
00:59:31,526 --> 00:59:34,863
- You did great out there.
- I blew the game, Janey.
736
00:59:35,072 --> 00:59:36,490
I let everyone down.
737
00:59:36,698 --> 00:59:41,578
It's just a football game, Jake.
Besides...
738
00:59:42,704 --> 00:59:44,623
...you didn't let me down.
739
00:59:45,207 --> 00:59:46,458
Really?
740
00:59:47,751 --> 00:59:50,545
Jake, you've taught me to be myself.
741
00:59:50,712 --> 00:59:53,757
You never saw me as the girl
in glasses.
742
00:59:53,965 --> 00:59:55,842
Don't forget
the paint-covered overalls.
743
00:59:56,718 --> 00:59:59,429
Right, you never noticed those either.
744
01:00:00,430 --> 01:00:02,974
You taught me a lot about myself too.
745
01:00:03,350 --> 01:00:07,604
Oh, Jake. Nothing could
ever come between us now.
746
01:00:07,813 --> 01:00:09,106
Jake Wyler.
747
01:00:10,899 --> 01:00:14,319
Congratulations.
You blew my perfect season.
748
01:00:14,528 --> 01:00:18,490
- Sefior You-Blew-My-Perfect-Season.
- What do you want, Austin?
749
01:00:18,740 --> 01:00:19,783
A life.
750
01:00:21,493 --> 01:00:22,869
And payback.
751
01:00:23,286 --> 01:00:26,456
- Come on, don't do this.
- No, I'll hang around.
752
01:00:26,665 --> 01:00:31,628
Maybe tell Janey a little
S-E-C-R-A-T-P...
753
01:00:35,048 --> 01:00:36,842
What's going on?
754
01:00:37,008 --> 01:00:38,760
Austin.
755
01:00:38,927 --> 01:00:40,011
This isn't funny!
756
01:00:41,388 --> 01:00:42,514
No.
757
01:00:44,015 --> 01:00:45,183
I don't believe it.
758
01:00:45,392 --> 01:00:50,105
I said I'd turn you into prom queen
when I thought you were ugly...
759
01:00:50,313 --> 01:00:55,110
...the girl with no friends who was
dirt poor and smelled a little funky.
760
01:00:55,986 --> 01:00:58,405
Look, I made a mistake.
761
01:00:58,989 --> 01:01:02,868
If I could go back, I never would've
made that stupid bet.
762
01:01:06,037 --> 01:01:07,122
What bet?
763
01:01:11,084 --> 01:01:13,795
I never said anything about a bet.
764
01:01:24,639 --> 01:01:25,807
All I said was:
765
01:01:26,016 --> 01:01:27,809
"I'm pretending to whisper a big secret...
766
01:01:28,018 --> 01:01:30,061
...so Jake thinks
I'm telling you a secret...
767
01:01:30,228 --> 01:01:32,731
...that will cause him
to break into a hysterical confession...
768
01:01:32,898 --> 01:01:38,153
...revealing a secret and confirming
everything I whispered in your ear."
769
01:02:04,721 --> 01:02:08,099
I wish I didn't make that bet
770
01:02:08,308 --> 01:02:11,895
That's not the guy I want to be
771
01:02:12,103 --> 01:02:15,607
If I could just turn back the clock
772
01:02:15,815 --> 01:02:20,779
Then Janey would still be with me
773
01:02:23,615 --> 01:02:26,785
Tell me, Mom, what should I do?
774
01:02:27,118 --> 01:02:28,453
I love this boy
775
01:02:28,620 --> 01:02:35,460
But he has been untrue
776
01:02:36,461 --> 01:02:39,381
I'll do my best to make things right
777
01:02:40,465 --> 01:02:44,094
I wish we could resolve this fight
778
01:02:44,970 --> 01:02:46,721
It could happen
779
01:02:46,888 --> 01:02:48,431
It could happen
780
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:52,769
- At the prom tonight
- At the prom tonight
781
01:02:58,358 --> 01:03:01,319
I'm getting pussy no matter what
782
01:03:01,528 --> 01:03:04,281
Even if it with dirty slut
783
01:03:04,489 --> 01:03:07,117
True love is what I want the most
784
01:03:07,325 --> 01:03:10,912
I just jerked off in your French toast
785
01:03:11,454 --> 01:03:17,210
So what if we have the same mother
786
01:03:17,377 --> 01:03:22,757
Tonight I'm going to fuck my brother
787
01:03:22,924 --> 01:03:25,760
In a few hours
I'll be queen of the prom
788
01:03:28,680 --> 01:03:32,309
I've been an alcoholic
Since my first tour in 'Nam
789
01:03:34,686 --> 01:03:38,356
I asked Janey to the prom
And she doesn't know why
790
01:03:40,734 --> 01:03:44,904
I'm only in the song
Because I'm a black guy
791
01:03:47,782 --> 01:03:52,579
I have no money
I have to make my own dress
792
01:03:54,372 --> 01:04:00,086
Look at me
My breasts are perky, yes
793
01:04:00,253 --> 01:04:03,214
I'm gonna win her back
No matter what it takes
794
01:04:03,423 --> 01:04:09,679
Here I go
I'm gonna forget about Jake
795
01:04:11,431 --> 01:04:13,350
Prom tonight
796
01:04:15,352 --> 01:04:17,228
Prom tonight
797
01:04:18,730 --> 01:04:20,106
Prom tonight
798
01:04:25,612 --> 01:04:28,281
It's gonna happen
Gonna happen
799
01:04:31,951 --> 01:04:38,750
At the prom
800
01:04:38,917 --> 01:04:39,959
Tonight
801
01:04:59,145 --> 01:05:05,193
When I was a freshman,
I threw 176 touchdown passes.
802
01:05:05,443 --> 01:05:10,782
My sophomore year, I ran 14 in
on my own with a sprained ankle...
803
01:05:10,990 --> 01:05:15,286
...a broken phalange, a ruptured
duodenum and a subdermal hematoma.
804
01:05:32,387 --> 01:05:34,472
I bet she great bonk.
805
01:05:34,681 --> 01:05:38,101
Excuse me, Bruce? No.
You don't bonk Amanda Becker.
806
01:05:38,685 --> 01:05:42,480
You make sweet, sweet love to her.
807
01:05:43,189 --> 01:05:45,400
Amanda Becker's like a flower.
808
01:05:46,067 --> 01:05:47,527
You smell her.
809
01:05:47,735 --> 01:05:49,696
You touch her gently.
810
01:05:50,113 --> 01:05:54,742
You admire the beauty.
You watch it blossom.
811
01:05:55,326 --> 01:05:59,914
And you thank God he created
something so perfect.
812
01:06:02,584 --> 01:06:04,085
Go to her.
813
01:06:16,681 --> 01:06:18,725
Be strong, Mitch!
814
01:06:31,779 --> 01:06:33,239
What do you expect from me?
815
01:06:35,200 --> 01:06:39,704
- Do you think I'll have sex with you?
- No! You don't understand.
816
01:06:39,913 --> 01:06:42,040
Because I am not a cheap slut.
817
01:06:42,248 --> 01:06:45,251
I don't screw every pathetic guy
that gives me a letter.
818
01:06:48,880 --> 01:06:50,173
I give them handjobs.
819
01:06:59,349 --> 01:07:02,769
- Want to dance?
- Only if we're horizontal.
820
01:07:03,269 --> 01:07:05,396
I totally heard that.
821
01:07:19,494 --> 01:07:21,371
We're dancing.
822
01:07:42,642 --> 01:07:43,726
It's funny.
823
01:07:43,893 --> 01:07:47,647
You'd never suspect everyone
here is a professional dancer.
824
01:08:02,078 --> 01:08:03,413
Oh, God. No.
825
01:08:03,621 --> 01:08:05,790
I want to do it right here
on the dance floor.
826
01:08:05,957 --> 01:08:07,125
Janey.
827
01:08:07,333 --> 01:08:10,587
Don't you forget our deal.
She wins, you're mine.
828
01:08:22,849 --> 01:08:26,978
And now the moment every popular guy
who's made a bet...
829
01:08:27,186 --> 01:08:31,774
...to turn a uniquely rebellious girl
into prom queen has been waiting for:
830
01:08:31,941 --> 01:08:35,320
The announcement
of the prom king and queen.
831
01:08:35,528 --> 01:08:38,031
This year's prom king is...
832
01:08:38,698 --> 01:08:39,741
Marty!
833
01:08:40,491 --> 01:08:41,659
...Jake Wyler!
834
01:08:57,133 --> 01:08:58,551
Way to go, Jake!
835
01:08:59,177 --> 01:09:02,013
This year's prom queen is...
836
01:09:02,221 --> 01:09:03,514
You got it, Priscilla!
837
01:09:03,681 --> 01:09:07,310
- It's in the bag, Priscilla.
- I don't believe it. It's a tie.
838
01:09:07,810 --> 01:09:08,853
A tie?
839
01:09:09,020 --> 01:09:10,730
- Holy shit!
- Oh, my God.
840
01:09:12,357 --> 01:09:14,692
Your new prom queens are...
841
01:09:16,110 --> 01:09:19,572
-...Kara and Sara Fratelli.
- Fuck.
842
01:09:20,615 --> 01:09:24,452
- Oh, my God!
- They deserve it.
843
01:09:26,871 --> 01:09:28,206
Congratulations!
844
01:09:30,500 --> 01:09:34,212
There we go! Your king and queen.
845
01:09:40,218 --> 01:09:43,596
I say we make like a tree
and branch...
846
01:09:44,389 --> 01:09:46,140
...out of here.
847
01:09:47,892 --> 01:09:49,769
All right, Kara and Sara.
848
01:09:49,936 --> 01:09:53,564
Now, it is traditional
for the king and queen...
849
01:09:53,773 --> 01:09:56,776
-...to share a ceremonial dance.
- Come here.
850
01:10:07,787 --> 01:10:09,372
You smell good.
851
01:10:22,927 --> 01:10:24,971
Janey.
852
01:10:29,016 --> 01:10:31,227
Do you know where Austin went?
853
01:10:31,436 --> 01:10:35,440
I know he rented a room at
the Sunrise Motel. Room number six.
854
01:10:35,648 --> 01:10:38,818
Past the ice dispenser.
Hit the Pepsi machine, you went too far.
855
01:10:39,861 --> 01:10:42,530
Oh, and the door will not be locked.
856
01:10:45,116 --> 01:10:46,617
That's all I know.
857
01:10:47,702 --> 01:10:48,995
Thanks, Malik.
858
01:10:50,037 --> 01:10:56,252
You know, you're intelligent and insightful.
You don't get the respect you deserve.
859
01:10:58,838 --> 01:11:00,131
You really mean that, Jake?
860
01:11:00,840 --> 01:11:04,594
That's great! I've always wanted
to discuss with you the repercussions--
861
01:11:04,761 --> 01:11:06,679
I actually got to go. Sorry.
862
01:11:07,430 --> 01:11:08,473
Motherfucker.
863
01:11:08,681 --> 01:11:10,600
Hold it right there, mister.
864
01:11:10,933 --> 01:11:16,189
I am not going to let you hurt Janey
again, okay? Besides, I love her.
865
01:11:16,397 --> 01:11:17,565
Well, so do I.
866
01:11:18,524 --> 01:11:23,196
But I'm the best friend, and I've
been in front of her the whole time...
867
01:11:23,404 --> 01:11:27,533
...and she just doesn't realize it yet,
but she will.
868
01:11:28,284 --> 01:11:31,537
I'm the cool guy who's learned
the error of his ways.
869
01:11:31,871 --> 01:11:35,249
She'll forgive my mistakes
and realize I love her.
870
01:11:37,043 --> 01:11:38,628
Damn it. That's true.
871
01:11:53,559 --> 01:11:56,521
Why's this door locked?
It's a fire hazard!
872
01:12:12,078 --> 01:12:14,121
Get out of the road!
873
01:12:14,330 --> 01:12:15,748
Hey, watch it, man!
874
01:12:16,958 --> 01:12:19,252
She's not attracted to you!
875
01:12:19,877 --> 01:12:21,796
She doesn't love you!
876
01:12:22,755 --> 01:12:25,299
You'll never be more than a friend!
877
01:12:26,133 --> 01:12:28,135
Two dollars!
878
01:12:37,228 --> 01:12:39,105
Ice dispenser.
879
01:12:39,730 --> 01:12:41,357
Six.
880
01:12:41,607 --> 01:12:45,778
Oh, yeah! I'll make you forget all
about losing prom queen.
881
01:12:45,945 --> 01:12:49,490
Tell me who your daddy is!
Tell me who your papa is!
882
01:12:51,951 --> 01:12:53,619
Get off her, man!
883
01:12:54,412 --> 01:12:55,580
Priscilla.
884
01:12:55,788 --> 01:12:57,248
Don't move.
885
01:13:02,128 --> 01:13:04,922
- What's going on?
- Something beautiful.
886
01:13:05,798 --> 01:13:09,010
- Where's Janey?
- Miss Run-Home-To-My-Daddy...
887
01:13:09,260 --> 01:13:10,761
...ran home to her daddy.
888
01:13:12,930 --> 01:13:16,517
- That's for taking Janey to the prom.
- You put the--
889
01:13:16,726 --> 01:13:20,271
- That's for hurting her at the party!
- This is really turning me on.
890
01:13:21,772 --> 01:13:24,901
That's for being really weird.
891
01:13:25,109 --> 01:13:26,569
Thank you.
892
01:13:32,116 --> 01:13:34,076
I don't know what that was for.
893
01:13:40,583 --> 01:13:42,251
Hello.
894
01:13:43,961 --> 01:13:45,171
Why...
895
01:13:46,631 --> 01:13:49,842
I never thought I'd hear myself
say this...
896
01:13:50,718 --> 01:13:55,556
...but for once, I wish I could meet
a nice, sensitive guy...
897
01:13:56,057 --> 01:13:57,892
...who wanted more than just sex.
898
01:14:00,478 --> 01:14:03,189
That is very admirable.
899
01:14:05,858 --> 01:14:08,778
I wish a guy would
take me out for dinner.
900
01:14:09,236 --> 01:14:11,030
I feel the same way.
901
01:14:13,157 --> 01:14:14,951
And for once...
902
01:14:16,911 --> 01:14:20,122
...I wish a guy would take a dump
on my chest.
903
01:14:23,334 --> 01:14:25,169
That is appalling.
904
01:14:29,507 --> 01:14:31,467
That really upsets me.
905
01:14:32,802 --> 01:14:35,429
I can't believe nobody's ever taken
a dump on your chest.
906
01:14:40,643 --> 01:14:42,228
Will you be that guy?
907
01:14:48,943 --> 01:14:52,863
It would be an honor and a privilege.
908
01:15:03,165 --> 01:15:04,667
Janey!
909
01:15:08,045 --> 01:15:09,296
Hello?
910
01:15:10,256 --> 01:15:12,091
Is anybody home?
911
01:15:12,633 --> 01:15:15,094
Get down! Enemy fire!
912
01:15:16,595 --> 01:15:18,264
Mr. Briggs?
913
01:15:18,472 --> 01:15:21,517
Excuse me, sir.
Do you know where Janey is?
914
01:15:21,767 --> 01:15:26,230
She went out there. On her own.
There's Charlie everywhere.
915
01:15:26,731 --> 01:15:29,150
Right. Do you know where she went?
916
01:15:29,483 --> 01:15:32,153
Couldn't take it. Went to the airport.
917
01:15:32,361 --> 01:15:37,074
Something about Paris.
Her tour was over.
918
01:15:37,366 --> 01:15:39,535
Paris. Thank you, sir.
919
01:15:39,994 --> 01:15:43,706
I need ammo! I can't hold them off
much longer!
920
01:15:49,670 --> 01:15:52,673
Off the road, you glasses
and ponytail freak!
921
01:16:05,811 --> 01:16:07,021
Two dollars!
922
01:16:07,480 --> 01:16:09,356
- Two dollars!
- Two dollars!
923
01:16:15,696 --> 01:16:17,865
Next stop, airport.
924
01:16:18,115 --> 01:16:22,661
The red zone is for the loading
and unloading of passengers.
925
01:16:22,870 --> 01:16:24,371
No parking.
926
01:16:24,580 --> 01:16:25,790
Attention, please.
927
01:16:25,998 --> 01:16:31,337
All red Porsche 944s parked in the
white zone will be towed immediately.
928
01:16:36,634 --> 01:16:40,179
Paris Air, Flight 805 to art school
in Paris...
929
01:16:40,387 --> 01:16:42,640
...from Gate 122, is now boarding.
930
01:16:56,070 --> 01:16:58,447
Excuse me, everyone!
931
01:16:59,073 --> 01:17:03,285
There's a girl boarding a plane
right now to Paris that I love.
932
01:17:04,829 --> 01:17:07,998
If I don't get there in time
and tell her how I feel...
933
01:17:08,582 --> 01:17:10,209
...I may never see her again.
934
01:17:15,256 --> 01:17:16,423
Go get her, son.
935
01:17:17,466 --> 01:17:18,759
Good luck, young man.
936
01:17:21,095 --> 01:17:22,930
- Go get her!
- Go for it.
937
01:17:25,599 --> 01:17:26,976
Oh, hell, just go.
938
01:17:29,770 --> 01:17:30,855
Freeze, bitch!
939
01:17:41,824 --> 01:17:44,285
You're bleeding on my suitcase.
940
01:17:50,541 --> 01:17:51,584
Excuse me!
941
01:17:52,626 --> 01:17:54,044
Excuse me, everyone!
942
01:17:54,545 --> 01:18:00,342
There's a girl about to board a plane
to Paris right now that I love and--
943
01:18:00,509 --> 01:18:03,888
We already heard that one. Asshole.
944
01:18:05,723 --> 01:18:10,686
This is the final call for Paris Air
Flight 805 to art school...
945
01:18:10,895 --> 01:18:13,147
...departing from Gate 122.
946
01:18:13,314 --> 01:18:14,940
Janey!
947
01:18:16,066 --> 01:18:17,401
Hey, shithead, that's mine.
948
01:18:18,485 --> 01:18:19,820
Give it back!
949
01:18:20,154 --> 01:18:23,866
Just believe in the ball, Jake.
And throw yourself.
950
01:18:37,213 --> 01:18:38,672
Nice shot, Jake.
951
01:18:40,925 --> 01:18:44,053
- Jake?
- Janey. Thank God I got to you in time.
952
01:18:44,220 --> 01:18:47,640
Listen to me.
I'm not going to let you go to Paris.
953
01:18:48,182 --> 01:18:50,976
- This is the final call...
- Why not?
954
01:18:51,185 --> 01:18:53,395
...for flight nonstop to art school.
955
01:18:53,604 --> 01:18:59,276
If you're finding words to stop a girl
from leaving, now would be the time.
956
01:18:59,443 --> 01:19:01,153
Janey...
957
01:19:02,529 --> 01:19:06,242
...I made that bet before I knew you.
958
01:19:07,576 --> 01:19:09,912
Before I really knew me.
959
01:19:11,622 --> 01:19:12,915
Oh, Jake.
960
01:19:15,042 --> 01:19:16,794
Okay, hold it right there.
961
01:19:20,923 --> 01:19:24,218
Tell me you didn't quote
Freddie Prinze Jr.
962
01:19:26,136 --> 01:19:29,932
I knew it. That was a line
from She's All That.
963
01:19:30,140 --> 01:19:32,559
I masturbate to that movie.
964
01:19:35,896 --> 01:19:36,981
Do you mind?
965
01:19:37,147 --> 01:19:40,359
No, not at all.
Masturbation's very healthy.
966
01:19:44,029 --> 01:19:48,909
Janey, you said you couldn't believe
in someone that didn't believe in you.
967
01:19:49,243 --> 01:19:53,414
Well, I believed in you.
I always believed in you.
968
01:19:54,581 --> 01:19:55,666
Oh, Jake.
969
01:19:56,417 --> 01:20:00,296
Oh, God. I can't believe
you fell for that crap.
970
01:20:00,462 --> 01:20:03,132
- That's from Pretty in Pink.
- Are you sure?
971
01:20:03,924 --> 01:20:05,009
Trust me.
972
01:20:05,175 --> 01:20:10,431
- Excuse me. What are you doing?
- Let me give you some advice, Jake.
973
01:20:10,597 --> 01:20:14,518
Lose the I'm-The-Cute-And-Sensitive
Popular-Boy routine.
974
01:20:14,768 --> 01:20:15,853
It's pathetic.
975
01:20:16,061 --> 01:20:19,398
And tell Janey
what's true in your heart.
976
01:20:19,606 --> 01:20:21,275
Stop being such a little bitch.
977
01:20:22,526 --> 01:20:27,364
And you. Miss Other-Side-Of-The-Tracks
Awkward-Rebel-With-Glasses.
978
01:20:27,823 --> 01:20:32,286
Wise up to Jake's bullshit.
Stop being such a dumb-ass.
979
01:20:35,873 --> 01:20:37,291
She's right.
980
01:20:38,000 --> 01:20:40,210
- Janey...
- Yes, Jake?
981
01:20:42,880 --> 01:20:45,591
Maybe you should get on that plane
and go to Paris.
982
01:20:47,801 --> 01:20:51,513
Well, if you stay,
we really only have the summer.
983
01:20:51,722 --> 01:20:56,018
Then I go to college. We'll spend
the occasional weekend together.
984
01:20:56,226 --> 01:20:57,478
Which is nice.
985
01:20:58,103 --> 01:21:02,608
But chances are, one night I'll get
wrecked and have sex with some girl.
986
01:21:02,816 --> 01:21:04,735
You'll find her thong and call me a slut.
987
01:21:05,027 --> 01:21:08,197
I'll call you a cocktease
and we'll break up.
988
01:21:08,405 --> 01:21:12,159
So when you really think about it,
what's the point?
989
01:21:15,329 --> 01:21:20,417
Well, that wasn't exactly the kind
of truth I was expecting.
990
01:21:22,795 --> 01:21:27,466
But I'm not gonna fall for it. How big
of a dumb-ass do you think I am?
991
01:21:27,633 --> 01:21:30,260
You obviously stole that
from Karate Kid.
992
01:21:30,886 --> 01:21:32,679
No, actually, I--
993
01:21:32,971 --> 01:21:35,474
Jake, it's okay.
994
01:21:35,974 --> 01:21:37,810
I love you too.
995
01:21:37,976 --> 01:21:39,686
We all know where this is going.
996
01:21:40,354 --> 01:21:42,398
Fucking teenagers.
997
01:21:51,865 --> 01:21:53,283
This is it.
998
01:21:53,450 --> 01:21:54,952
The right moment.
999
01:22:09,675 --> 01:22:11,552
Son of a bitch!
1000
01:22:30,737 --> 01:22:32,030
Betty...
1001
01:22:33,031 --> 01:22:35,159
...meet Apollonia.
1002
01:22:35,325 --> 01:22:37,744
We're going to have a three-way.
1003
01:28:40,857 --> 01:28:43,777
Sun's burned my cornea
1004
01:28:44,444 --> 01:28:48,114
I can no longer see
1005
01:28:48,698 --> 01:28:53,745
I'm not kidding
Somebody please fucking help me
1006
01:28:57,123 --> 01:28:58,834
Quick! Grab her guitar.
75051
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