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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,586 --> 00:00:03,663 Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend... 2 00:00:03,688 --> 00:00:05,221 REBECCA: Greg, listen, 3 00:00:05,223 --> 00:00:06,272 I care about you. 4 00:00:06,274 --> 00:00:07,557 Tell me... 5 00:00:07,559 --> 00:00:09,392 tell me how you feel, if you have any feelings. 6 00:00:09,394 --> 00:00:11,445 I need-I need to... to take... 7 00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:13,303 - I need to take a nap. - Greg? 8 00:00:13,520 --> 00:00:15,353 Rebecca, no matter what I do... 9 00:00:16,709 --> 00:00:18,543 ... I feel you with me. 10 00:00:20,899 --> 00:00:23,366 Why don't you... leave a few things here? 11 00:00:23,368 --> 00:00:24,487 I have plenty of room. 12 00:00:24,512 --> 00:00:26,145 Just put it in one of my drawers. 13 00:00:27,573 --> 00:00:29,718 Is that Greg's sweatshirt? 14 00:00:29,875 --> 00:00:31,741 I am looking for Greg. 15 00:00:31,743 --> 00:00:33,076 I really need to find him. 16 00:00:33,078 --> 00:00:35,078 I need to speak to your son, Greg. 17 00:00:35,429 --> 00:00:36,913 Look, there he is, there he is! 18 00:00:37,601 --> 00:00:39,082 Hi, I'm Greg, 19 00:00:39,084 --> 00:00:40,375 and I'm an alcoholic. 20 00:00:41,086 --> 00:00:42,636 I'm addicted to her life. 21 00:00:42,638 --> 00:00:45,422 It's like I... did another fist full of blow. 22 00:00:45,424 --> 00:00:47,090 - What's this? - Okay, 23 00:00:47,092 --> 00:00:49,092 just a simple contract laying out the terms of our friendship. 24 00:00:49,094 --> 00:00:50,594 It stipulates that my services as a friend 25 00:00:50,619 --> 00:00:51,951 exclude shenanigans. 26 00:00:51,976 --> 00:00:53,776 There's just still something missing in my life. 27 00:00:54,206 --> 00:00:56,117 I just... and I don't know what it is. 28 00:01:00,390 --> 00:01:03,135 GREG: Once I took my very first drink, 29 00:01:03,137 --> 00:01:04,970 I felt bulletproof. 30 00:01:04,972 --> 00:01:07,973 For the first time in my life, I didn't care about anything. 31 00:01:07,975 --> 00:01:09,775 About how people felt, about how I felt, 32 00:01:09,777 --> 00:01:11,343 about what was going on with my mom and dad. 33 00:01:11,368 --> 00:01:13,312 Alcohol became my shield. 34 00:01:13,976 --> 00:01:15,442 And it worked. 35 00:01:15,632 --> 00:01:18,717 At least I thought it worked until 27 days ago. 36 00:01:20,154 --> 00:01:21,961 Thanks for bringing the donuts this week. 37 00:01:21,986 --> 00:01:22,985 You bet, man. 38 00:01:23,207 --> 00:01:24,507 And thank you for sharing, dude. 39 00:01:24,532 --> 00:01:26,031 Oh, thanks, Guardrail. 40 00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:27,389 "Guardrail," is that because 41 00:01:27,414 --> 00:01:29,148 you were conceived on the open road, or... 42 00:01:29,173 --> 00:01:30,506 Nah, my buddy Throttle gave me that name 43 00:01:30,531 --> 00:01:32,898 because I was so overprotective of my coke. 44 00:01:32,930 --> 00:01:34,601 (chuckling): Those were the days. 45 00:01:34,867 --> 00:01:36,450 - So, things going okay? - With me? 46 00:01:36,452 --> 00:01:38,536 Yeah, weirdly enough, I'm doing all right. 47 00:01:38,890 --> 00:01:40,426 Feel my feelings, yadda yadda. 48 00:01:40,625 --> 00:01:42,623 I remember how good I felt when I first got sober. 49 00:01:42,625 --> 00:01:44,508 - Almost euphoric. - Exactly. 50 00:01:44,510 --> 00:01:46,043 Then I found it was just a phase. 51 00:01:46,045 --> 00:01:47,671 We call it the pink cloud. 52 00:01:48,154 --> 00:01:50,381 When that went away, I had to deal with some rough stuff. 53 00:01:50,734 --> 00:01:52,633 Listen, thank you for the indirect, 54 00:01:52,635 --> 00:01:55,436 passive-aggressive warning, but I'm coming to the meetings, 55 00:01:55,438 --> 00:01:56,906 I'm doing great. 56 00:01:57,187 --> 00:01:59,137 Hey, tell you what, how about I bring the donuts next time? 57 00:01:59,734 --> 00:02:02,461 Uh, okay, cool. 58 00:02:03,179 --> 00:02:04,812 You know we really love our donuts here. 59 00:02:04,814 --> 00:02:06,063 I'm on it. 60 00:02:06,065 --> 00:02:07,695 What could possibly stop me? 61 00:02:08,067 --> 00:02:10,368 - (humming) - (door opening, closing) 62 00:02:10,370 --> 00:02:11,375 (sings indistinctly) 63 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,097 Oh, hey, Josh! How was karate? 64 00:02:13,122 --> 00:02:14,288 Were you the best one there? 65 00:02:14,290 --> 00:02:15,456 Becks, the only person 66 00:02:15,458 --> 00:02:16,457 I'm trying to be better than 67 00:02:16,459 --> 00:02:18,242 is the person I was yesterday. 68 00:02:18,244 --> 00:02:19,910 - Mm. - And today, I kicked 69 00:02:19,912 --> 00:02:21,412 Yesterday Josh's ass! 70 00:02:21,414 --> 00:02:22,413 Yeah, you did! 71 00:02:22,415 --> 00:02:23,831 Oh. Oh! 72 00:02:23,833 --> 00:02:25,666 (moans) 73 00:02:25,668 --> 00:02:27,585 Mmm, what smells so good? 74 00:02:27,587 --> 00:02:28,803 Oh, I made you something. 75 00:02:29,437 --> 00:02:31,389 It's called noodle kugel. 76 00:02:31,391 --> 00:02:32,757 It's a Jewish thing. I figured, I don't know, 77 00:02:32,759 --> 00:02:33,808 I've had your people's food. 78 00:02:33,810 --> 00:02:34,975 You've never had my people's food. 79 00:02:35,281 --> 00:02:36,364 It's delicious. 80 00:02:36,366 --> 00:02:37,398 It's my bubbe's recipe. 81 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:38,866 Oh, bubbe would've hated you. 82 00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:40,068 She was really racist. 83 00:02:40,070 --> 00:02:42,487 It was a different time, but still... wrong. 84 00:02:42,489 --> 00:02:43,821 Anyway, you hungry? 85 00:02:43,823 --> 00:02:45,740 Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know. 86 00:02:45,742 --> 00:02:48,203 I had a sushi burrito after karate. 87 00:02:48,234 --> 00:02:50,414 Oh, that's okay. No worries. 88 00:02:50,439 --> 00:02:51,914 See, that's what I love about you. 89 00:02:51,939 --> 00:02:53,391 - You love me? - Love about you. 90 00:02:53,416 --> 00:02:54,734 Love about me... right, right, right, got it. 91 00:02:54,759 --> 00:02:56,392 Like, I know that you're not gonna get mad at me, 92 00:02:56,417 --> 00:02:58,200 because I didn't eat the Jewish noodles. 93 00:02:58,505 --> 00:02:59,718 We're independent. 94 00:02:59,743 --> 00:03:01,242 You know, we come together when we want to, 95 00:03:01,267 --> 00:03:03,984 and when we don't, we stay in our own lanes. 96 00:03:04,009 --> 00:03:06,171 Lanes, exactly! Exactly. 97 00:03:06,367 --> 00:03:08,096 Uh, all right, so no kugel for now. 98 00:03:08,098 --> 00:03:10,264 Do you want to watch a movie just like in a chilling 99 00:03:10,266 --> 00:03:12,567 in own... lanes type of way? 100 00:03:12,569 --> 00:03:13,651 It's just, I-I don't know. 101 00:03:13,653 --> 00:03:14,852 Feel like I haven't seen you in a forever. 102 00:03:14,854 --> 00:03:16,738 You've had a thing every night this week. 103 00:03:16,740 --> 00:03:18,773 (groans) I have plans. 104 00:03:18,775 --> 00:03:20,274 Football at Hector's house. 105 00:03:20,276 --> 00:03:21,554 And I know how you hate football. 106 00:03:21,579 --> 00:03:22,628 I don't hate football. 107 00:03:22,745 --> 00:03:24,027 I-I get why it's fun, it just 108 00:03:24,052 --> 00:03:26,219 kind of propagates the ideology of physical dominance 109 00:03:26,244 --> 00:03:28,077 and the economic subjugation of the working poor. 110 00:03:28,102 --> 00:03:30,269 Plus the concussions. It should be illegal, LOL. 111 00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:31,877 (laughs) Um... 112 00:03:31,902 --> 00:03:32,818 What are you doing Friday? 113 00:03:32,956 --> 00:03:34,455 Shoot, Friday I got a thing. 114 00:03:34,457 --> 00:03:35,790 Just another guy thing. 115 00:03:35,792 --> 00:03:37,828 But, Josh, that's the thing... I love guy stuff. 116 00:03:37,853 --> 00:03:39,882 I'm, like, such a guy. 117 00:03:39,914 --> 00:03:41,968 When I was a kid, people thought I was a guy all the time. 118 00:03:42,109 --> 00:03:43,633 It turned out I had a hormone imbalance. 119 00:03:43,635 --> 00:03:46,365 It was a very, it was a very... hard time. 120 00:03:46,390 --> 00:03:48,755 But-but, yeah, I'm down to do whatever. 121 00:03:48,757 --> 00:03:50,923 What are you doing Friday, broseph? 122 00:03:50,925 --> 00:03:53,436 Just going to a new place called The Paddle. 123 00:03:53,461 --> 00:03:55,044 It's a Ping-Pong cocktaileria. 124 00:03:55,046 --> 00:03:56,045 It's pretty fun. 125 00:03:56,047 --> 00:03:57,580 Wait, hold on a second. 126 00:03:57,582 --> 00:03:58,578 Did you say Ping-Pong? 127 00:03:58,603 --> 00:03:59,379 (glissando chimes) 128 00:03:59,404 --> 00:04:01,273 Josh, shut up. 129 00:04:01,298 --> 00:04:02,983 Shut up. Shut your stupid face. 130 00:04:03,008 --> 00:04:03,974 - What... ? - No, 131 00:04:03,976 --> 00:04:06,007 Josh, shut up! Shut up right now! 132 00:04:06,032 --> 00:04:07,114 You know that 133 00:04:07,139 --> 00:04:09,306 I was a teenage Ping-Pong champion. 134 00:04:09,501 --> 00:04:11,835 I was the Junior Miss Table Tennis Champion 135 00:04:11,860 --> 00:04:13,843 for the Eastern Northern Seaboard County District. 136 00:04:13,868 --> 00:04:16,168 Seriously? The Junior Miss Table Tennis Champion 137 00:04:16,193 --> 00:04:18,276 for the Eastern Northern Seaboard County District? 138 00:04:18,346 --> 00:04:20,130 How do I not know that already? 139 00:04:20,359 --> 00:04:22,531 I don't know. Maybe we should hang out more. 140 00:04:22,556 --> 00:04:24,222 Maybe we should live together. (laughs) 141 00:04:24,247 --> 00:04:25,554 (both laughing) 142 00:04:25,579 --> 00:04:27,195 - Oh... - Oh, yeah. 143 00:04:27,220 --> 00:04:28,353 Yeah, it's true. 144 00:04:28,378 --> 00:04:29,586 This is great. 145 00:04:29,611 --> 00:04:32,101 I mean, you should come by and give us a few pointers, then. 146 00:04:32,126 --> 00:04:34,960 Oh, my God, I couldn't. I'm-I'm so rusty, but okay! 147 00:04:34,985 --> 00:04:35,992 Cool. 148 00:04:37,891 --> 00:04:39,553 Yeah. 149 00:04:41,734 --> 00:04:43,901 ♪ I'm just a girl in love ♪ 150 00:04:43,926 --> 00:04:45,926 ♪ La-la-la, lovey-dove ♪ 151 00:04:45,928 --> 00:04:48,762 ♪ I can't be held responsible for my actions ♪ 152 00:04:48,764 --> 00:04:50,180 ♪ She's an ingenue ♪ 153 00:04:50,182 --> 00:04:52,265 ♪ I have no underlying issues to address ♪ 154 00:04:52,267 --> 00:04:54,818 ♪ I'm certifiably cute and adorably obsessed ♪ 155 00:04:54,820 --> 00:04:56,686 ♪ They say love makes you crazy ♪ 156 00:04:56,688 --> 00:04:58,939 ♪ Therefore, you can't call her crazy ♪ 157 00:04:58,941 --> 00:05:00,941 ♪ 'Cause when you call her crazy ♪ 158 00:05:00,943 --> 00:05:03,118 ♪ You're just calling her in love. ♪ 159 00:05:03,143 --> 00:05:04,842 Blam! 160 00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:09,032 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 161 00:05:09,259 --> 00:05:11,168 (elevator bell dings, indistinct chatter) 162 00:05:11,170 --> 00:05:13,336 Hello, men! 163 00:05:14,256 --> 00:05:15,422 What's with her? 164 00:05:15,424 --> 00:05:17,040 I don't know, but I'll find out. 165 00:05:17,042 --> 00:05:18,368 I'm her best friend. 166 00:05:18,627 --> 00:05:20,040 Everyone knows that, right? 167 00:05:20,065 --> 00:05:21,665 Everyone knows you say it. 168 00:05:22,712 --> 00:05:24,243 Same thing, right? 169 00:05:24,883 --> 00:05:27,050 (mouse clicking) 170 00:05:31,517 --> 00:05:32,766 Hey, babe. What's up? 171 00:05:32,768 --> 00:05:34,067 Nothing. Never mind. 172 00:05:35,126 --> 00:05:36,320 If I told you, 173 00:05:36,470 --> 00:05:37,752 it would, you know, violate 174 00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:39,921 the no-shenanigans clause of our friend contract. 175 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,223 Oh. But basically, I have to learn 176 00:05:42,225 --> 00:05:43,591 how to be, like, a competition-level 177 00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:44,893 Ping-Pong player in a day. 178 00:05:44,895 --> 00:05:47,145 Wow. Okay. Anyways, listen... 179 00:05:48,732 --> 00:05:50,515 - (gasps) You're not! - I am. 180 00:05:50,782 --> 00:05:53,351 (gasps) I'm applying to law school! 181 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,103 - (screams) - (laughing) 182 00:05:55,105 --> 00:05:57,155 - Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! - (both laughing) 183 00:05:57,157 --> 00:05:59,991 BOTH: Law school! Esquire! Esquire! 184 00:05:59,993 --> 00:06:02,577 BOTH: Paula! Paula! Esquire! Paula! Esquire... Paula. 185 00:06:02,602 --> 00:06:04,259 What word do you want to chant? Just let me know. 186 00:06:04,284 --> 00:06:05,610 I can't choose. They're all awesome. 187 00:06:05,635 --> 00:06:07,101 Okay, listen. It doesn't matter. 188 00:06:07,126 --> 00:06:09,293 I need a letter of recommendation. 189 00:06:09,688 --> 00:06:11,870 Rebecca Nora Bunch, would you do me the honor? 190 00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,172 Yes, yes, yes. A thousand times yes. 191 00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:15,623 - Oh. (laughs) - (squeaks) 192 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:16,875 (laughs) 193 00:06:16,877 --> 00:06:18,760 Oh, thank you. Thank you so much. 194 00:06:18,762 --> 00:06:20,378 Okay, I need that by Friday, okay? 195 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,347 I'll get it done today. Oh, God, Rebecca. 196 00:06:23,321 --> 00:06:25,216 Things are finally starting to happen for me. 197 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,601 You know? 198 00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:27,954 I can't believe it. 199 00:06:28,472 --> 00:06:32,557 My dreams might actually... come true. 200 00:06:33,563 --> 00:06:35,462 You so deserve it. 201 00:06:35,756 --> 00:06:37,774 - (laughing) - PAULA: Mm. 202 00:06:37,799 --> 00:06:39,215 Okay. 203 00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:41,470 (sighs) Oh. 204 00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:47,372 (sighs) 205 00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:52,127 ♪ When I was a little girl ♪ 206 00:06:52,129 --> 00:06:54,496 ♪ I felt like a princess ♪ 207 00:06:54,498 --> 00:06:58,717 ♪ So naive and full of hope ♪ 208 00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:01,886 ♪ I thought my dreams would come true ♪ 209 00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:04,305 ♪ But then as I grew ♪ 210 00:07:04,307 --> 00:07:06,758 ♪ The world was all like ♪ 211 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,426 (giggles) 212 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:09,800 ♪ Nope ♪ 213 00:07:10,647 --> 00:07:12,991 But this time, maybe, 214 00:07:13,503 --> 00:07:16,292 just maybe... 215 00:07:17,187 --> 00:07:19,187 (birds singing) 216 00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:24,275 ♪ Maybe this dream won't lead to disgrace ♪ 217 00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:28,780 ♪ Maybe this dream is ♪ 218 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:33,418 ♪ Maybe this dream won't poop on my face ♪ 219 00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:38,039 ♪ Like a seagull at the beach ♪ 220 00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:42,677 ♪ Maybe this dream won't be like my wedding ♪ 221 00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:46,514 ♪ The organ played "There Goes the Bride" ♪ 222 00:07:46,516 --> 00:07:48,049 I came back. 223 00:07:48,051 --> 00:07:52,137 ♪ Maybe this dream won't be like some maggots ♪ 224 00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:57,438 ♪ Feasting on the rotting deer carcass of my pride ♪ 225 00:07:58,251 --> 00:08:01,863 ♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh, oh ♪ 226 00:08:01,865 --> 00:08:06,451 ♪ Maybe this dream won't be like my vibrator ♪ 227 00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:09,454 ♪ Breaking when I need it most ♪ 228 00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:10,872 ♪ Tweedle deedle Dee! ♪ 229 00:08:10,874 --> 00:08:15,627 ♪ Maybe this dream won't be like Ebola ♪ 230 00:08:15,629 --> 00:08:18,580 ♪ Eating the flesh of its host ♪ 231 00:08:18,582 --> 00:08:20,548 ♪ Tweedle deedle Doo! ♪ 232 00:08:20,550 --> 00:08:22,917 - ♪ Maybe this dream won't be like ♪ - ♪ Tweet-tweet, tweet-tweet ♪ 233 00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:25,220 - ♪ When I go running ♪ - ♪ Tweet, tweet, tweet ♪ 234 00:08:25,222 --> 00:08:27,338 ♪ And I have to take a dump ♪ 235 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,591 ♪ So I have to rush home ♪ 236 00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,874 ♪ Plus I also have my period ♪ 237 00:08:31,899 --> 00:08:34,729 ♪ So I have menstrual cramps plus dump cramps ♪ 238 00:08:34,731 --> 00:08:37,315 ♪ And as I run frantically ♪ 239 00:08:37,317 --> 00:08:39,517 ♪ I pee just a little ♪ 240 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,519 ♪ Because I've had two babies ♪ 241 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,771 ♪ So by the time I get home ♪ 242 00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:47,985 ♪ My undies smell like a sewer rat ♪ 243 00:08:48,643 --> 00:08:55,047 ♪ Maybe this dream won't be like that ♪ 244 00:08:57,126 --> 00:09:03,837 ♪ Maybe this dream will finally make me feel ♪ 245 00:09:04,219 --> 00:09:10,376 ♪ Like I deserve ♪ 246 00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,885 ♪ A... ♪ 247 00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:20,774 ♪ Dream. ♪ 248 00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:28,399 (sighs) 249 00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:31,402 (phone ringing) 250 00:09:32,297 --> 00:09:34,383 Paula Proctor. How may I help you? 251 00:09:41,259 --> 00:09:44,187 No, don't even worry about it. It's my pleasure. Yeah. 252 00:09:44,212 --> 00:09:45,711 Okay. Nope. Thank you. 253 00:09:48,243 --> 00:09:50,305 Rebecca told me you're applying to law school. 254 00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:51,663 - Ee! - And so... 255 00:09:52,352 --> 00:09:54,757 I took the liberty of writing you 256 00:09:54,782 --> 00:09:56,482 ♪ A recommendation. ♪ 257 00:09:56,484 --> 00:09:59,438 Oh. Well, um, here's the thing. 258 00:09:59,463 --> 00:10:01,555 Rebecca's actually doing it for me, 259 00:10:01,580 --> 00:10:03,122 'cause, I mean, we're besties. 260 00:10:03,147 --> 00:10:04,563 - So... - Oh. My... Yeah. Yeah. 261 00:10:04,588 --> 00:10:06,149 Of course. Of course. I understand. 262 00:10:06,174 --> 00:10:08,341 I mean, you and I are best friends, and she's your bestie. 263 00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:09,774 Whatever that is. 264 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:12,526 But you know what? If you need a second recommendation, 265 00:10:12,528 --> 00:10:14,028 consider it done. 266 00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:16,247 No. Here's the thing. I don't. 267 00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,922 So, um, but, like, thank you. 268 00:10:18,947 --> 00:10:19,837 Well, that's cool. That's cool. 269 00:10:19,862 --> 00:10:22,063 I'll just hang on to this, and... 270 00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:23,871 you know, maybe do another draft, 271 00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:25,368 another polish, as they say. 272 00:10:25,393 --> 00:10:26,809 - Okay. Yeah. - Yeah. 273 00:10:26,834 --> 00:10:29,251 Yeah. Everything could always use a little improvement. 274 00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,928 Just like a friendship. 275 00:10:30,930 --> 00:10:32,763 (elevator bell dings) 276 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,716 - Can I help you? - Hi. 277 00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:36,934 I'm Xiao Huang, 278 00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:39,887 2016 San Gabriel Valley Junior Table Tennis Champion. 279 00:10:40,300 --> 00:10:41,726 Do you know where I can find... 280 00:10:41,751 --> 00:10:42,773 REBECCA: Ooh, ooh! That's mine! That's mine! 281 00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:44,775 He's with me! He's with me! Hi, I'm Rebecca. 282 00:10:44,777 --> 00:10:45,943 Hi. Do you need coffee 283 00:10:45,945 --> 00:10:47,728 before we get started? Espresso? No. 284 00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:49,730 I just think if it's really meant to be, 285 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:52,283 you don't need to manufacture some fake enthusiasm 286 00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:53,734 for Josh's hobby. 287 00:10:53,868 --> 00:10:56,621 Isn't a relationship all about meeting in the middle? 288 00:10:56,727 --> 00:10:59,991 Okay, Dr. Ruth, I'm paying you for Ping-Pong, 289 00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,410 not the hokey-pokey about the hanky-panky. 290 00:11:02,782 --> 00:11:04,745 Oh, that's funny. Should I tweet that? 291 00:11:04,747 --> 00:11:05,913 Let's just get back to Ping-Pong. 292 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:06,914 How do I hold the paddle? 293 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:08,749 Do I hold it like this or like this? 294 00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,134 You hold it like this. 295 00:11:11,157 --> 00:11:12,740 No, wait, I look dumb. 296 00:11:12,742 --> 00:11:14,608 I need to look hot. Can you do that? 297 00:11:14,610 --> 00:11:16,571 Sexy Ping-Pong. Copy that. 298 00:11:16,596 --> 00:11:18,045 Cool. 299 00:11:20,501 --> 00:11:21,833 There he is. 300 00:11:21,835 --> 00:11:23,585 Mr. Leaving Las Vegas, 301 00:11:23,587 --> 00:11:25,253 but with an inspirational ending. 302 00:11:25,255 --> 00:11:26,471 Kev, don't. 303 00:11:26,473 --> 00:11:28,807 I get it. You want to downplay your courage. 304 00:11:28,809 --> 00:11:30,258 I understand. 305 00:11:30,260 --> 00:11:31,560 I'm just so proud of you, man. 306 00:11:31,562 --> 00:11:33,678 You inspired me to quit kettle chips. 307 00:11:33,680 --> 00:11:35,097 That's my gateway drug. 308 00:11:35,099 --> 00:11:37,149 That's not a drug. It's a potato. 309 00:11:37,151 --> 00:11:40,102 Also, you no longer have to serve alcoholic beverages. 310 00:11:40,337 --> 00:11:43,522 And... I've taken beer-battered shrimp off the menu. 311 00:11:43,524 --> 00:11:45,282 Oh, God. 312 00:11:45,307 --> 00:11:47,094 Hey, Greg. Heard you finally 313 00:11:47,119 --> 00:11:48,554 figured out you're an alcoholic. 314 00:11:48,579 --> 00:11:49,694 I'm happy for you. 315 00:11:49,696 --> 00:11:51,863 - Thanks? - Yeah, I had an ex-boyfriend 316 00:11:51,865 --> 00:11:53,665 who went to rehab for his Oxy addiction. 317 00:11:53,667 --> 00:11:55,450 Lot of ups and downs. 318 00:11:55,452 --> 00:11:57,753 - May he rest in peace. - He died? 319 00:11:57,755 --> 00:11:59,254 No, but I hope he does. 320 00:11:59,256 --> 00:12:01,373 He stole a lot of 20s out of my purse. 321 00:12:01,727 --> 00:12:03,375 Anyway, I'm pulling for you, buddy. 322 00:12:03,377 --> 00:12:04,241 We all are. 323 00:12:04,266 --> 00:12:06,688 Guys, I appreciate your support, but can we just... 324 00:12:06,915 --> 00:12:09,992 do our jobs and not talk about this so much? 325 00:12:10,017 --> 00:12:11,967 I understand. We should keep things normal. 326 00:12:11,969 --> 00:12:13,468 That's what we should do. Yeah. 327 00:12:14,115 --> 00:12:15,563 Listen up, gang! 328 00:12:15,913 --> 00:12:17,362 Be normal! 329 00:12:17,724 --> 00:12:19,391 Greg does not want to treated differently 330 00:12:19,393 --> 00:12:21,133 for his alcohol addiction! 331 00:12:21,158 --> 00:12:22,607 So, be cool. 332 00:12:23,195 --> 00:12:24,399 Be cool. 333 00:12:25,699 --> 00:12:27,904 Emergency meeting called by Serrano... 334 00:12:27,906 --> 00:12:29,484 Did you tell him about you and Rebecca? 335 00:12:29,509 --> 00:12:30,430 You said you were gonna. 336 00:12:30,455 --> 00:12:32,288 I haven't seen him, no one has. 337 00:12:32,345 --> 00:12:34,629 He hasn't been around. I will tell him 338 00:12:34,631 --> 00:12:36,797 - at some point. - Gentlemen. 339 00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:38,299 What do you think Serrano wants? 340 00:12:38,301 --> 00:12:40,897 Uh, I don't know. Maybe we should ask him, 341 00:12:40,922 --> 00:12:43,187 since he's right there. He's... 342 00:12:43,189 --> 00:12:45,139 waving us over? 'Sup, man? 343 00:12:45,141 --> 00:12:46,807 You ghosted on us. Where you been? 344 00:12:46,809 --> 00:12:47,692 Yeah, what's this meeting about? 345 00:12:47,694 --> 00:12:49,477 Okay, guys, give him a break. 346 00:12:49,479 --> 00:12:52,113 He's trying to tell us. Greg, whatever this is, 347 00:12:52,115 --> 00:12:55,116 it concerns all of us. Or... right? 348 00:12:55,118 --> 00:12:58,286 Y-You asked us all to come here because, uh, you... 349 00:12:58,288 --> 00:13:01,454 I mean, you're not putting any one individual on blast, right? 350 00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:02,977 Dude, 351 00:13:03,126 --> 00:13:05,212 - what? - Shh! Let him talk. 352 00:13:05,237 --> 00:13:06,987 Greg, you have the floor. 353 00:13:07,012 --> 00:13:08,261 Sit down, guys. 354 00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:13,240 Here's the thing. I'm... 355 00:13:13,265 --> 00:13:14,631 sorry I've been M.I.A. 356 00:13:14,945 --> 00:13:16,687 And that I lied to you. 357 00:13:17,126 --> 00:13:20,024 My mom didn't have botched plastic surgery. 358 00:13:20,343 --> 00:13:23,010 Though she did get her nose done recently and it looks amazing. 359 00:13:23,012 --> 00:13:24,743 But the truth is, 360 00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,504 I have been dealing with some things. 361 00:13:29,352 --> 00:13:30,401 Like? 362 00:13:30,403 --> 00:13:31,986 Like I got a DUI, 363 00:13:31,988 --> 00:13:33,688 spent a night in jail, turns out I'm an alcoholic. 364 00:13:33,690 --> 00:13:35,406 I've been going to meetings and I'm trying to stay sober. 365 00:13:35,408 --> 00:13:37,575 That's it, bingo, bango, done. Beers? 366 00:13:38,593 --> 00:13:39,459 Wow. 367 00:13:39,696 --> 00:13:42,524 Wow, dude, this is... heavy. 368 00:13:42,549 --> 00:13:44,999 I know. It's a shock, right? 369 00:13:45,201 --> 00:13:46,417 Eh... 370 00:13:46,977 --> 00:13:48,869 Or not a shock. 371 00:13:49,188 --> 00:13:51,587 Yeah, no, not really. Sort of saw that coming. 372 00:13:51,612 --> 00:13:52,861 I'm shocked. 373 00:13:52,959 --> 00:13:56,177 A-And upset. Greg, I'm sorry. 374 00:13:56,179 --> 00:13:57,962 I'm so... sorry. 375 00:13:57,964 --> 00:13:59,213 I feel terrible. 376 00:13:59,215 --> 00:14:01,966 If I did anything to contribute to this in any way... 377 00:14:01,968 --> 00:14:04,051 - What? - I-I... In... 378 00:14:04,053 --> 00:14:06,354 I was the one with the fake ID in high school. 379 00:14:06,356 --> 00:14:08,806 At every party, I would dare you to drink the whole bottle 380 00:14:08,808 --> 00:14:10,618 because I thought it was funny or something. 381 00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:13,040 God, I don't know if I can live with myself anymore. 382 00:14:13,065 --> 00:14:14,815 Weirdly, this isn't about you. 383 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,321 It's okay. Don't give Josh a hard time. 384 00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:18,899 My sponsor, Guardrail... 385 00:14:18,901 --> 00:14:21,068 That's his biker name. It's a long story. 386 00:14:21,070 --> 00:14:22,319 He has a friend named Throttle. 387 00:14:22,321 --> 00:14:23,738 It's a very colorful group of people. 388 00:14:23,740 --> 00:14:25,790 I-I'm not supposed to say names, but I think 389 00:14:25,792 --> 00:14:27,375 nicknames are okay, but just don't 390 00:14:27,377 --> 00:14:29,543 tell any of your biker friends... Just cover our bases. 391 00:14:29,545 --> 00:14:31,245 But anyway, Guardrail said 392 00:14:31,247 --> 00:14:34,215 some people in my life would take it harder than others. 393 00:14:34,217 --> 00:14:36,250 It's... it's all right, Josh. 394 00:14:36,252 --> 00:14:38,290 No one caused this. 395 00:14:38,806 --> 00:14:40,829 It's me. And I'm working on it. 396 00:14:41,507 --> 00:14:44,141 Well, I'm proud of you. Cheers, Greg. 397 00:14:44,143 --> 00:14:45,760 Don't cheers an alcoholic, dumb-ass. 398 00:14:45,762 --> 00:14:47,645 It's a light beer, idiot-ass. 399 00:14:47,647 --> 00:14:49,513 White Josh is right. I-I don't think 400 00:14:49,515 --> 00:14:50,899 we should be drinking around you. 401 00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:52,401 No, it's okay. I... 402 00:14:52,602 --> 00:14:53,934 You don't have the problem, I do. 403 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:56,937 You guys can drink, I can't. 404 00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:58,516 Let me show you what I mean. 405 00:14:58,681 --> 00:15:00,847 Come on. 406 00:15:00,943 --> 00:15:02,943 (all exclaim) 407 00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:05,149 (all laughing) 408 00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:08,282 ♪ Gather ye 'round and I'll tell you a tale ♪ 409 00:15:08,284 --> 00:15:10,334 ♪ Of all the great times ♪ 410 00:15:10,336 --> 00:15:12,420 ♪ I've had with an ale ♪ 411 00:15:12,422 --> 00:15:14,255 ♪ There's joy and there's glory ♪ 412 00:15:14,257 --> 00:15:16,006 ♪ More than you can think ♪ 413 00:15:16,008 --> 00:15:20,010 ♪ Yes, this is what happens to me when I drink ♪ 414 00:15:20,930 --> 00:15:23,380 ♪ I pee my pants, my pants ♪ 415 00:15:23,382 --> 00:15:25,049 ♪ I pee my pants ♪ 416 00:15:25,051 --> 00:15:28,769 ♪ I get up from the bar to find pee on my pants ♪ 417 00:15:28,771 --> 00:15:30,471 ♪ I say it's water ♪ 418 00:15:30,473 --> 00:15:32,106 ♪ But all it takes is a glance ♪ 419 00:15:32,108 --> 00:15:35,976 ♪ For people to realize I peed my pants ♪ 420 00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:38,145 Wow, I did not know it was that bad. 421 00:15:38,147 --> 00:15:41,866 ♪ Yes, wine can be fun... White, rosé and red ♪ 422 00:15:41,868 --> 00:15:45,202 ♪ Till I call up my boss, say I wish he was dead ♪ 423 00:15:45,204 --> 00:15:48,789 ♪ Chase down the regret with some gin for good luck ♪ 424 00:15:48,791 --> 00:15:52,460 ♪ Then steal my cousin Jim's landscaping truck ♪ 425 00:15:52,462 --> 00:15:56,413 ♪ Drive home, then I puke on my cat, my cat ♪ 426 00:15:56,415 --> 00:15:57,882 ♪ I puke on my cat ♪ 427 00:15:57,884 --> 00:16:01,669 ♪ I fall through the doorway and puke on my cat ♪ 428 00:16:01,671 --> 00:16:04,722 ♪ Poor little Bruno did not expect that ♪ 429 00:16:04,724 --> 00:16:08,759 ♪ I try for the toilet, but puke on my cat ♪ 430 00:16:11,063 --> 00:16:13,314 ♪ While some can enjoy ♪ 431 00:16:13,316 --> 00:16:15,516 ♪ A scotch with a steak ♪ 432 00:16:15,839 --> 00:16:17,735 ♪ Or one glass of wine ♪ 433 00:16:17,737 --> 00:16:20,464 ♪ Then they're barely awake ♪ 434 00:16:20,768 --> 00:16:22,156 ♪ For me it's much different ♪ 435 00:16:22,158 --> 00:16:25,359 ♪ What happens when ♪ 436 00:16:25,361 --> 00:16:27,361 ♪ I try to have one ♪ 437 00:16:27,363 --> 00:16:29,530 ♪ It just turns into ten ♪ 438 00:16:29,532 --> 00:16:30,998 ♪ And then... ♪ 439 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:32,867 ♪ I fly a plane ♪ 440 00:16:32,869 --> 00:16:35,586 ♪ A plane, I fly a plane ♪ 441 00:16:35,588 --> 00:16:37,505 ♪ I knock on the cockpit, shouting ♪ 442 00:16:37,507 --> 00:16:38,923 ♪ "I'll fly this plane" ♪ 443 00:16:38,925 --> 00:16:42,626 ♪ We emergency landed, the TSA came ♪ 444 00:16:42,628 --> 00:16:46,213 ♪ Now I'm banned from Southwest 'cause I try to fly planes ♪ 445 00:16:46,215 --> 00:16:47,264 Everybody! 446 00:16:47,266 --> 00:16:49,099 MEN: ♪ He has sex with a bush ♪ 447 00:16:49,101 --> 00:16:52,353 ♪ A bush, he has sex with a bush ♪ 448 00:16:52,355 --> 00:16:53,888 That wasn't a woman? 449 00:16:53,890 --> 00:16:55,606 MEN: ♪ No, it was a bush ♪ 450 00:16:55,608 --> 00:16:59,643 ♪ It had twigs and leaves, 'cause it was a bush ♪ 451 00:16:59,645 --> 00:17:01,362 ♪ That's where that scar comes from ♪ 452 00:17:01,364 --> 00:17:02,863 ♪ From sexing a bush ♪ 453 00:17:02,865 --> 00:17:06,400 ♪ But he's breaking the cycle and making a push ♪ 454 00:17:06,402 --> 00:17:09,036 ♪ He's quitting his drinking ♪ 455 00:17:09,038 --> 00:17:10,905 ♪ And saving his pants ♪ 456 00:17:10,907 --> 00:17:13,457 ♪ And his cat and Southwest and Jim's truck ♪ 457 00:17:13,459 --> 00:17:15,242 - ♪ And my car ♪ - ♪ My car, too ♪ 458 00:17:15,244 --> 00:17:18,412 ♪ And the bush! ♪ 459 00:17:18,414 --> 00:17:19,830 (cheering, applause) 460 00:17:19,832 --> 00:17:21,827 I didn't do anything wrong. Yes! 461 00:17:21,852 --> 00:17:23,985 Again, not about you. 462 00:17:24,136 --> 00:17:26,086 (sighs) 463 00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,088 Dear God, thank you for this boba. 464 00:17:28,090 --> 00:17:30,341 Bless the hands that have rolled these tapioca balls. 465 00:17:30,343 --> 00:17:32,760 Is that how boba is made? I'm not sure. 466 00:17:32,762 --> 00:17:34,929 Don't you only say grace before a meal? 467 00:17:34,931 --> 00:17:37,314 Boba is a drink that you eat. 468 00:17:37,316 --> 00:17:38,816 Okay, dude, listen. 469 00:17:38,818 --> 00:17:40,100 I'm in a rough place. 470 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:42,353 Greg is an alcoholic. 471 00:17:42,355 --> 00:17:44,694 I can't tell him about me and Rebecca. 472 00:17:45,100 --> 00:17:46,857 He's in such a fragile state. I... 473 00:17:46,859 --> 00:17:48,442 I don't think he could handle it. 474 00:17:48,444 --> 00:17:50,444 - Okay, so... - Now, I know what you're gonna say 475 00:17:50,446 --> 00:17:52,196 "Be honest, blah, blah, blah." 476 00:17:52,198 --> 00:17:53,530 You know, "Jesus likes honesty, 477 00:17:53,532 --> 00:17:54,865 blah, blah, blah." 478 00:17:54,867 --> 00:17:56,951 But Jesus didn't have sex with his friend's ex. 479 00:17:56,953 --> 00:17:58,285 I mean, not that I know of, anyway. 480 00:17:58,287 --> 00:17:59,536 Maybe he did. I don't know. 481 00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:01,077 Josh, stop. 482 00:18:01,457 --> 00:18:04,375 I think your impulse to not tell Greg is wise. 483 00:18:04,377 --> 00:18:05,452 And mature. 484 00:18:05,477 --> 00:18:07,071 What? No. 485 00:18:07,233 --> 00:18:08,545 Thank you. Really? 486 00:18:08,547 --> 00:18:10,547 Telling Greg would be selfish. It would only alleviate 487 00:18:10,549 --> 00:18:12,600 your own guilt, blah, blah, blah, 488 00:18:12,602 --> 00:18:14,602 Which I guess is how I sound to you? 489 00:18:14,604 --> 00:18:15,585 Mm-hmm. 490 00:18:15,610 --> 00:18:17,810 Josh, you're right. 491 00:18:17,890 --> 00:18:19,940 Greg has a lot on his plate right now. 492 00:18:19,942 --> 00:18:21,038 Don't add to it. 493 00:18:21,063 --> 00:18:22,479 Wow. 494 00:18:22,561 --> 00:18:23,894 I'm right about this? 495 00:18:24,821 --> 00:18:26,340 Great. Because I really 496 00:18:26,365 --> 00:18:27,448 didn't want to tell him. 497 00:18:27,999 --> 00:18:29,984 Uh, well, uh, you are gonna have a chance 498 00:18:29,986 --> 00:18:32,703 to practice not telling him right now. 499 00:18:34,323 --> 00:18:37,625 So... there's this thing in recovery 500 00:18:37,627 --> 00:18:40,544 where you own up to your mistakes. 501 00:18:40,546 --> 00:18:42,413 And I'm just starting to do that now, 502 00:18:42,415 --> 00:18:44,331 and I know I need to start with you. 503 00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:47,452 Oh, Greg, you do not have to do this. 504 00:18:47,477 --> 00:18:49,728 Please, just let me get this out. 505 00:18:50,675 --> 00:18:52,709 I am so sorry about the French fries. 506 00:18:54,022 --> 00:18:55,046 What? 507 00:18:55,071 --> 00:18:56,938 You know that time when we went out 508 00:18:56,963 --> 00:18:59,129 after seeing your friend's terrible band, 509 00:18:59,710 --> 00:19:01,765 and you ordered French fries 510 00:19:01,767 --> 00:19:04,647 and I ate all of them because I was wasted? 511 00:19:05,321 --> 00:19:08,507 When I think of myself doing that, I am... 512 00:19:10,466 --> 00:19:12,046 That was so selfish of me. 513 00:19:12,889 --> 00:19:14,244 And I'm sorry. 514 00:19:14,421 --> 00:19:15,829 Wow, I'm really glad 515 00:19:15,831 --> 00:19:18,365 - you reached out about that. - You are? 516 00:19:18,367 --> 00:19:20,200 No, I don't remember that at all, 517 00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:22,119 but I will take your French fry apology 518 00:19:22,121 --> 00:19:23,454 and apply it to other stuff. 519 00:19:23,456 --> 00:19:25,788 Okay. That works. 520 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,042 Did he see me? 521 00:19:28,044 --> 00:19:29,877 - Mm-hmm. Yeah. - He saw me? Okay, I'm gonna walk 522 00:19:29,879 --> 00:19:32,346 right up to him, say a quick hello, and boom, I'm cool. 523 00:19:32,348 --> 00:19:33,964 Yeah. Dude, this is gonna go great for you. 524 00:19:33,966 --> 00:19:35,182 Yeah. 525 00:19:35,741 --> 00:19:37,017 Oh, hey. 526 00:19:37,019 --> 00:19:39,603 Nice to see you guys. How are you? 527 00:19:39,605 --> 00:19:41,772 Hey, man, we didn't get to talk much earlier. 528 00:19:41,774 --> 00:19:43,524 I heard about you and Valencia... that's rough. 529 00:19:43,526 --> 00:19:44,775 Where are you staying? 530 00:19:44,777 --> 00:19:46,276 Wh... Where am I staying? 531 00:19:46,522 --> 00:19:48,217 Where do I... 532 00:19:48,710 --> 00:19:49,980 reside? 533 00:19:49,982 --> 00:19:51,949 Where do you hang your hat? 534 00:19:52,257 --> 00:19:53,283 Um... 535 00:19:53,285 --> 00:19:54,535 um... 536 00:19:54,537 --> 00:19:57,287 I have an Airbnb in Claremont. 537 00:19:57,553 --> 00:20:00,074 It belongs to a celebrity. 538 00:20:00,076 --> 00:20:02,076 He uses it as his weekend house. 539 00:20:02,078 --> 00:20:04,639 What celebrity weekends in Claremont? 540 00:20:04,696 --> 00:20:07,280 Oh, I'm not supposed to tell anyone. I mean... 541 00:20:07,305 --> 00:20:09,188 It's Josh Hutcherson, but you didn't hear that from me. 542 00:20:09,213 --> 00:20:10,379 (chuckles) Yeah, he goes there 543 00:20:10,404 --> 00:20:12,321 when he wants to feel down to earth, yeah. 544 00:20:12,388 --> 00:20:13,921 Look, Josh, I know you're weirded out 545 00:20:13,923 --> 00:20:15,339 by the whole alcoholic thing. 546 00:20:15,341 --> 00:20:17,307 I know it's coming from a place of friendship. 547 00:20:17,522 --> 00:20:18,288 Yeah. 548 00:20:18,313 --> 00:20:20,889 Thank you. I... I think it's kind of nice. 549 00:20:23,420 --> 00:20:25,194 (loudly): I slept with Rebecca! 550 00:20:26,152 --> 00:20:28,068 Oh. There it is. 551 00:20:28,070 --> 00:20:30,154 I'm sorry, what? It was the night of the wedding 552 00:20:30,156 --> 00:20:31,572 and I'm so sorry. 553 00:20:31,574 --> 00:20:33,663 You're really good at secrets, Josh. 554 00:20:33,688 --> 00:20:35,104 You slept with Rebecca that night. 555 00:20:36,924 --> 00:20:38,350 That makes sense. 556 00:20:39,007 --> 00:20:40,614 I was being a drunk jerk 557 00:20:40,616 --> 00:20:42,950 and abandoned her by blacking out. 558 00:20:42,952 --> 00:20:44,118 I can't blame you guys. 559 00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:46,120 - I-I have to take responsibility... - Okay, wait. 560 00:20:46,122 --> 00:20:47,454 Before you forgive me, you should know 561 00:20:47,456 --> 00:20:49,790 it wasn't just the one time. 562 00:20:49,792 --> 00:20:51,210 It's been, uh... 563 00:20:51,235 --> 00:20:53,436 (muttering) 564 00:20:57,132 --> 00:20:58,682 - More than once. - Yeah, um, 565 00:20:58,684 --> 00:21:01,051 it's been a lot of times, and I'm sort of staying with her. 566 00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,604 And there is no celebrity Airbnb in Claremont. 567 00:21:03,606 --> 00:21:05,186 I don't know famous people. I wish I did. 568 00:21:05,211 --> 00:21:06,494 I mean, I sold a karaoke machine to Michael Madsen 569 00:21:06,519 --> 00:21:07,201 (whispers): Stop talking. 570 00:21:07,226 --> 00:21:08,475 At Aloha once... 571 00:21:08,477 --> 00:21:09,943 It's okay, Josh. It's cool. 572 00:21:10,078 --> 00:21:12,569 I don't need to know any more information. We're cool. 573 00:21:13,561 --> 00:21:15,149 Oh, God. 574 00:21:15,901 --> 00:21:19,369 I feel so much better. (chuckles) 575 00:21:19,371 --> 00:21:20,988 Let's just put this behind us. 576 00:21:20,990 --> 00:21:22,239 Okay? 577 00:21:22,241 --> 00:21:23,540 Are you sure? 578 00:21:23,542 --> 00:21:25,242 Yes. 579 00:21:30,550 --> 00:21:31,678 Okay. 580 00:21:33,004 --> 00:21:34,022 Bye. 581 00:21:35,655 --> 00:21:36,654 Yeah. 582 00:21:36,820 --> 00:21:38,257 What a mess. 583 00:21:39,882 --> 00:21:41,809 Yeah. Good job. 584 00:21:41,811 --> 00:21:43,677 I'm sorry, did you just bro-hug 585 00:21:43,679 --> 00:21:45,929 the guy that's sleeping with your ex-girlfriend? 586 00:21:46,141 --> 00:21:47,577 Yeah. 587 00:21:47,766 --> 00:21:50,017 Okay, but you're, like, upset about it, right? 588 00:21:50,019 --> 00:21:51,652 You really liked Rebecca. 589 00:21:51,654 --> 00:21:52,986 You dicked me over for her. 590 00:21:52,988 --> 00:21:54,321 It's, like, kind of important to me 591 00:21:54,323 --> 00:21:56,023 that you be upset about this, Greg. 592 00:21:56,025 --> 00:21:59,159 Listen, what Rebecca and I had together was an undefined thing, 593 00:21:59,161 --> 00:22:01,411 followed by a nightmare wedding date. 594 00:22:01,639 --> 00:22:03,530 And then I didn't call her for a month. 595 00:22:03,532 --> 00:22:07,251 Dude, you're getting sober... You're not turning into a robot. 596 00:22:07,514 --> 00:22:09,536 It's okay to have feelings. 597 00:22:09,538 --> 00:22:11,538 It's fine. I'm okay. 598 00:22:11,733 --> 00:22:13,957 I'm, uh... I'm doing amazing. 599 00:22:13,959 --> 00:22:15,759 Mm-hmm. I'm bringing donuts 600 00:22:15,761 --> 00:22:17,427 to my next meeting. I know that doesn't sound like a big deal, 601 00:22:17,429 --> 00:22:18,712 but it is. Oh, it is. 602 00:22:18,714 --> 00:22:21,014 So, I, um, actually have to go to work now. 603 00:22:21,016 --> 00:22:21,965 I'm working a double. 604 00:22:21,967 --> 00:22:24,264 Yeah, but... Take care, Heather. 605 00:22:27,773 --> 00:22:29,640 ♪ Whooptie freakin' do ♪ 606 00:22:29,642 --> 00:22:32,726 ♪ My best friend is sleeping with my ex behind my back ♪ 607 00:22:32,728 --> 00:22:34,361 ♪ Who cares? ♪ 608 00:22:34,363 --> 00:22:36,196 ♪ I don't ♪ 609 00:22:36,198 --> 00:22:38,874 ♪ But I could if I wanted... ♪ 610 00:22:48,570 --> 00:22:50,858 Hey. Oh. 611 00:22:51,289 --> 00:22:53,072 - What are you doin'? - Oh, 612 00:22:53,074 --> 00:22:54,908 I'm just, uh, stretchin' for my private Ping-Pong lesson 613 00:22:54,910 --> 00:22:56,702 in the conference room with an 11-year-old child. 614 00:22:56,962 --> 00:22:58,225 Of course. 615 00:22:58,250 --> 00:22:59,806 'Cause that makes perfect sense. 616 00:22:59,831 --> 00:23:01,965 Okay. Hey, listen, I just came in to remind you 617 00:23:01,967 --> 00:23:03,249 that today is Friday. 618 00:23:03,251 --> 00:23:05,468 Oh, thank God. Friday. TGIF. 619 00:23:05,470 --> 00:23:09,923 Oh! Full House, Family Matters, Step by Step. 620 00:23:09,925 --> 00:23:11,674 Okay, no, you were supposed to, um, 621 00:23:11,676 --> 00:23:13,764 give me that letter of recommendation by today. 622 00:23:14,085 --> 00:23:15,712 Oh. Right. 623 00:23:15,714 --> 00:23:18,514 Oh, oh, oh, the letter, the letter, the letter. 624 00:23:18,761 --> 00:23:21,078 Okay, can I get it to you tonight? 625 00:23:21,103 --> 00:23:23,246 At literally, like, 2:00 a.m. 626 00:23:23,271 --> 00:23:24,835 Can you submit it at 2:00 a.m.? 627 00:23:25,678 --> 00:23:27,607 Yes. Yep. 628 00:23:27,609 --> 00:23:29,442 Yeah, that's no problem at all. 629 00:23:29,444 --> 00:23:30,994 I mean, or, you know, I could... 630 00:23:30,996 --> 00:23:32,225 I could just use Darryl's letter, I guess. 631 00:23:32,250 --> 00:23:33,827 No. Oh, come on, 632 00:23:33,852 --> 00:23:35,155 don't use Darryl's letter. 633 00:23:35,180 --> 00:23:36,780 I mean, I love the guy, but, I mean, he can't even spell 634 00:23:36,805 --> 00:23:38,104 the word "separate." 635 00:23:38,129 --> 00:23:40,163 - No, I'll do it, I'll do it. - Okay. 636 00:23:40,188 --> 00:23:41,604 I don't know, I'm just kind of getting the feeling 637 00:23:41,629 --> 00:23:44,184 that maybe you don't... want to write the letter. 638 00:23:44,209 --> 00:23:45,792 Oh, my God, no. You're hurting my heart. 639 00:23:45,794 --> 00:23:46,793 Of course I want to write it. 640 00:23:46,795 --> 00:23:50,129 Ugh! But Xiao just got here 641 00:23:50,131 --> 00:23:51,180 and I don't want to be rude, 642 00:23:51,182 --> 00:23:52,882 because he's an 11-year-old child. 643 00:23:52,884 --> 00:23:54,717 But, Paula, I will write it, okay? 644 00:23:54,719 --> 00:23:57,991 I promise. I always keep my promises. 645 00:23:58,369 --> 00:24:00,202 (English accent): A Lannister always pays her debts. 646 00:24:00,850 --> 00:24:03,693 I just started on season one. So no spoilers. (grunts) 647 00:24:03,695 --> 00:24:04,894 Okay. 648 00:24:07,649 --> 00:24:09,148 Darryl, what were you doing? 649 00:24:09,319 --> 00:24:11,618 Ned Stark dies, by the way. 650 00:24:11,620 --> 00:24:12,902 No, but he's the show. 651 00:24:12,904 --> 00:24:14,454 Don't get too used to Robb either. 652 00:24:14,456 --> 00:24:15,955 (gasps) No. 653 00:24:15,957 --> 00:24:19,042 (groans) 654 00:24:19,749 --> 00:24:21,077 You know what, 655 00:24:21,079 --> 00:24:22,850 you're getting a lot better at this. 656 00:24:22,875 --> 00:24:24,485 And do I... do I look hot? 657 00:24:24,510 --> 00:24:25,967 Uh, yeah? 658 00:24:27,002 --> 00:24:28,885 Thank you, young man. 659 00:24:28,887 --> 00:24:30,837 Oh, this is so great. 660 00:24:30,839 --> 00:24:32,422 'Cause when Josh sees that I'm good at Ping-Pong, 661 00:24:32,424 --> 00:24:34,891 he's gonna know that I'm 'ol and independent 662 00:24:34,893 --> 00:24:36,809 and he's gonna be really impressed. 663 00:24:36,811 --> 00:24:39,479 And I know exactly what he's gonna say to himself. 664 00:24:39,481 --> 00:24:41,981 (rock intro plays) 665 00:24:41,983 --> 00:24:45,151 ♪ Whoa, yeah ♪ 666 00:24:45,153 --> 00:24:47,487 ♪ Okay ♪ 667 00:24:47,489 --> 00:24:49,072 ♪ Hey! ♪ 668 00:24:49,074 --> 00:24:50,406 ♪ Whoa ♪ 669 00:24:50,408 --> 00:24:54,027 ♪ Bros, beer, sports! ♪ 670 00:24:54,029 --> 00:24:57,914 ♪ When she walked into the Ping-Pong hall ♪ 671 00:24:57,916 --> 00:25:00,783 ♪ Casually tossing a Ping-Pong ball ♪ 672 00:25:00,785 --> 00:25:03,870 ♪ I could tell she's the most perfect girl ♪ 673 00:25:03,872 --> 00:25:05,538 ♪ Who's ever existed ♪ 674 00:25:05,540 --> 00:25:07,457 ♪ Dude! ♪ 675 00:25:07,459 --> 00:25:09,876 ♪ Oh, man, look at her pong that ping ♪ 676 00:25:09,878 --> 00:25:13,513 ♪ When she plays, she doesn't care if anyone's watching ♪ 677 00:25:13,515 --> 00:25:17,717 ♪ She does it for herself and that puts my fears to rest ♪ 678 00:25:17,719 --> 00:25:19,969 ♪ Bro! ♪ 679 00:25:19,971 --> 00:25:21,721 ♪ After each rally ♪ 680 00:25:21,723 --> 00:25:25,558 ♪ She chugs beer instead of water ♪ 681 00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:27,944 ♪ She's so aloof, it borders on cold ♪ 682 00:25:27,946 --> 00:25:32,398 ♪ And that's what makes me want her ♪ 683 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:33,566 ♪ Ping-Pong girl ♪ 684 00:25:33,568 --> 00:25:36,152 ♪ She's so independent ♪ 685 00:25:36,154 --> 00:25:38,988 ♪ This fantasy beats out flight attendant ♪ 686 00:25:38,990 --> 00:25:40,907 ♪ She's playing Ping-Pong on her own terms ♪ 687 00:25:40,909 --> 00:25:42,825 ♪ So I'm the pursuer ♪ 688 00:25:42,827 --> 00:25:44,160 ♪ Pursuer ♪ 689 00:25:44,162 --> 00:25:46,079 ♪ Ping-Pong girl ♪ 690 00:25:46,081 --> 00:25:48,247 ♪ Her forehand is a jet stream ♪ 691 00:25:48,249 --> 00:25:51,918 ♪ And her backhand's right out of a sex dream ♪ 692 00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:55,755 ♪ And that's the best messy bun I've ever seen in the world ♪ 693 00:25:55,757 --> 00:25:57,890 ♪ My P-P-Ping-Pong girl ♪ 694 00:25:57,892 --> 00:26:01,177 ♪ Girl, girl ♪ 695 00:26:01,179 --> 00:26:03,730 ♪ Dudes sing these kinds of songs! ♪ 696 00:26:03,732 --> 00:26:06,599 ♪ Whoa, bro ♪ 697 00:26:06,601 --> 00:26:09,268 ♪ Sega, jock itch! ♪ 698 00:26:09,270 --> 00:26:11,020 ♪ When she serves the ball ♪ 699 00:26:11,022 --> 00:26:12,605 ♪ Look how she throws it ♪ 700 00:26:12,607 --> 00:26:16,692 ♪ She's so hot but she doesn't know it ♪ 701 00:26:16,694 --> 00:26:20,113 ♪ She probably just found that outfit laying around ♪ 702 00:26:20,115 --> 00:26:22,448 ♪ Like in the trash! ♪ 703 00:26:22,450 --> 00:26:25,118 ♪ Look at her skill on the Ping-Pong... uh, court? ♪ 704 00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:28,337 ♪ Nothing's hotter than a chick who's good at sports ♪ 705 00:26:28,339 --> 00:26:30,623 ♪ Whoa! She scored 1,000 points ♪ 706 00:26:30,625 --> 00:26:31,674 ♪ I think I love her ♪ 707 00:26:31,676 --> 00:26:34,377 ♪ That's a lot of points! ♪ 708 00:26:34,379 --> 00:26:39,966 ♪ Ping-Pong shows that she has control over her body ♪ 709 00:26:39,968 --> 00:26:43,386 ♪ But it doesn't threaten my masculinity ♪ 710 00:26:43,388 --> 00:26:46,439 ♪ Like basketball or hockey ♪ 711 00:26:46,441 --> 00:26:48,641 ♪ Ping-Pong girl ♪ 712 00:26:48,643 --> 00:26:51,310 ♪ She's like Serena or Venus ♪ 713 00:26:51,312 --> 00:26:54,147 ♪ Just watching her swing affects my penis ♪ 714 00:26:54,149 --> 00:26:57,867 ♪ You know, us dudes, we love to talk about our penises ♪ 715 00:26:57,869 --> 00:26:58,985 ♪ Our penises ♪ 716 00:26:58,987 --> 00:27:01,154 ♪ Ping-Pong girl ♪ 717 00:27:01,156 --> 00:27:02,905 ♪ She's so indifferent ♪ 718 00:27:02,907 --> 00:27:05,908 ♪ It makes me want a tangible commitment ♪ 719 00:27:05,910 --> 00:27:10,079 ♪ She and I should give a 30-year mortgage a whirl ♪ 720 00:27:10,081 --> 00:27:13,132 ♪ My P-P-Ping-Pong girl ♪ 721 00:27:13,134 --> 00:27:16,169 ♪ Girl, girl ♪ 722 00:27:16,171 --> 00:27:17,336 ♪ Girl ♪ 723 00:27:17,338 --> 00:27:18,838 ♪ Marriage! ♪ 724 00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,507 ♪ Girl, girl ♪ 725 00:27:21,509 --> 00:27:24,744 ♪ Let's share a Costco card! ♪ 726 00:27:24,769 --> 00:27:26,954 ♪ Girl, gir... ♪ 727 00:27:27,098 --> 00:27:28,648 (indistinct chatter) 728 00:27:28,650 --> 00:27:29,816 Up, one, 729 00:27:29,818 --> 00:27:30,683 two, three. 730 00:27:30,685 --> 00:27:33,486 One, two, three. One, two, three. 731 00:27:33,488 --> 00:27:35,071 One, two, three. 732 00:27:35,073 --> 00:27:36,239 (Ping-Pong ball clacking) 733 00:27:36,241 --> 00:27:39,075 Why are all my friends in love with this girl? 734 00:27:46,713 --> 00:27:48,282 SCOTT: So she's still working 735 00:27:48,307 --> 00:27:49,494 on the recommendation? 736 00:27:49,519 --> 00:27:51,386 Uh, yeah. But I'm... It's okay. 737 00:27:51,411 --> 00:27:52,743 She's gonna get it to me tonight. 738 00:27:52,767 --> 00:27:54,601 I mean, she's got a lot of work to do, okay? 739 00:27:54,603 --> 00:27:55,852 She's got a lot going on in her life. 740 00:27:55,854 --> 00:27:57,237 She's busy. I mean, 741 00:27:57,239 --> 00:27:59,079 I shouldn't have asked her for such a big favor. 742 00:27:59,274 --> 00:28:01,774 What? I don't think it's such a big favor. 743 00:28:01,776 --> 00:28:03,443 I mean, after everything you've done for her... 744 00:28:03,445 --> 00:28:05,945 - That she didn't ask for. - She did ask you 745 00:28:05,947 --> 00:28:07,820 to throw a rock through a window and... 746 00:28:07,845 --> 00:28:08,615 Okay, okay. 747 00:28:08,617 --> 00:28:11,034 Look, she's-she's young, she's confused... 748 00:28:11,036 --> 00:28:13,620 Wow, you are really making excuses for her. 749 00:28:13,622 --> 00:28:16,005 - More than you would for our kids. - That's 'cause she's better 750 00:28:16,007 --> 00:28:17,697 than our kids, Scott, okay? 751 00:28:17,722 --> 00:28:19,767 She didn't pull a knife on Aunt June, for starters. 752 00:28:19,792 --> 00:28:22,415 Paula, she owes you. 753 00:28:22,464 --> 00:28:23,463 Oh. 754 00:28:23,465 --> 00:28:24,797 Oh. No, no, no, no. 755 00:28:24,799 --> 00:28:26,466 Uh-uh. She does not owe me, okay? 756 00:28:26,468 --> 00:28:28,650 She is my friend, and she is busy. 757 00:28:28,937 --> 00:28:30,770 And, you know, I don't know, 758 00:28:30,772 --> 00:28:33,473 maybe she thinks this whole law school thing is dumb, okay? 759 00:28:33,475 --> 00:28:35,058 Maybe it is. I'm old. 760 00:28:35,060 --> 00:28:36,559 Maybe-maybe it's too late. 761 00:28:36,561 --> 00:28:38,369 Maybe-maybe this whole thing is dumb. 762 00:28:38,394 --> 00:28:39,593 It's not dumb! 763 00:28:40,447 --> 00:28:42,587 Your dreams are not dumb. 764 00:28:43,151 --> 00:28:44,962 And I know Rebecca doesn't think that. 765 00:28:44,987 --> 00:28:46,861 She's a very smart girl. 766 00:28:46,886 --> 00:28:49,603 Ha. Suck my paddle, losers! All right, let Mama have some. 767 00:28:49,650 --> 00:28:51,066 Okay, no, no, Daddy's gonna take that one. 768 00:28:51,068 --> 00:28:53,485 Okay. All right, all right. Goldilocks wants some porridge. 769 00:28:53,487 --> 00:28:56,788 Okay. Oh... O-Okay, you got it. 770 00:28:56,790 --> 00:28:58,790 - All right. Okay. Yep. - (Ping-Pong ball clacking) 771 00:28:58,792 --> 00:29:00,923 I thought you said she was a champion. 772 00:29:01,580 --> 00:29:03,046 She did say she was rusty. 773 00:29:03,048 --> 00:29:04,464 Okay, Attaboy! Attaboy, Xiao! 774 00:29:04,466 --> 00:29:06,166 Yeah, yeah. I'm with him, I'm with him! 775 00:29:06,168 --> 00:29:08,117 - Dude, where's Greg? - Yeah. 776 00:29:08,142 --> 00:29:10,336 - He should be here by now. - He's probably on his way. 777 00:29:10,338 --> 00:29:11,471 I'll get him a beer. 778 00:29:11,994 --> 00:29:13,572 - Dude. - What? 779 00:29:13,925 --> 00:29:15,008 I don't know the rules. 780 00:29:15,010 --> 00:29:16,486 There's one rule. 781 00:29:16,665 --> 00:29:18,428 JOSH: You guys told Greg to come here? 782 00:29:18,430 --> 00:29:19,729 Tonight? 783 00:29:20,262 --> 00:29:21,461 Why would you do that? 784 00:29:21,486 --> 00:29:23,403 Why do you care? 785 00:29:23,556 --> 00:29:26,515 Oh, my God. You told him? 786 00:29:26,540 --> 00:29:27,770 You told me to tell him. 787 00:29:27,772 --> 00:29:28,655 Tell him what? 788 00:29:28,657 --> 00:29:30,156 Josh and Rebecca are having sex 789 00:29:30,158 --> 00:29:32,692 - and basically living together. - What?! 790 00:29:33,025 --> 00:29:34,525 We're not living together. 791 00:29:34,527 --> 00:29:36,410 I'm just crashing at her apartment. 792 00:29:36,412 --> 00:29:37,528 Okay, you tell yourself that. 793 00:29:37,530 --> 00:29:38,946 Okay. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold up. 794 00:29:38,948 --> 00:29:41,165 So Greg knows that you and Rebecca are together. 795 00:29:41,523 --> 00:29:42,822 Oh, no. 796 00:29:42,847 --> 00:29:44,835 Greg is probably freaking out. Is that why he's not here? 797 00:29:45,048 --> 00:29:46,920 He said he was gonna come here right after his meeting. 798 00:29:46,922 --> 00:29:47,955 He should be here. 799 00:29:47,957 --> 00:29:49,056 Yeah, where is he? 800 00:29:53,509 --> 00:29:55,846 Your boy never showed with the donuts. 801 00:29:55,848 --> 00:29:57,462 Shut up, Hubcap. 802 00:29:57,716 --> 00:29:59,716 You never put the new guy on donuts. 803 00:29:59,718 --> 00:30:01,351 Yeah, I know. 804 00:30:01,353 --> 00:30:03,064 I thought he could handle it. 805 00:30:05,224 --> 00:30:07,524 Quick question. Let me just clear something up. 806 00:30:07,526 --> 00:30:10,736 You told Hector about you and Rebecca and not me? 807 00:30:11,564 --> 00:30:12,673 Why? 808 00:30:13,232 --> 00:30:14,853 Uh, you're a little judgy. 809 00:30:15,095 --> 00:30:16,261 You're a lot judgy. 810 00:30:16,286 --> 00:30:17,702 You're like Judge Reinhold. 811 00:30:17,736 --> 00:30:18,603 Not a judge. 812 00:30:18,628 --> 00:30:19,877 Guys, I'm really starting to worry. 813 00:30:19,944 --> 00:30:21,110 He said he'd be here. 814 00:30:21,142 --> 00:30:22,712 Drunk or not, Greg is prompt. 815 00:30:22,875 --> 00:30:24,708 So, what do you guys think? I'm a little rusty 816 00:30:24,733 --> 00:30:27,054 from my Eastern Northern Seaboard County District days, 817 00:30:27,079 --> 00:30:28,579 but, you know, it's coming back to me. 818 00:30:28,581 --> 00:30:29,963 It's like riding a bicycle. What's wrong? 819 00:30:30,197 --> 00:30:32,549 Greg is supposed to be here. He's late. 820 00:30:32,691 --> 00:30:36,212 And the guys are worried he's drinking again, because... 821 00:30:36,736 --> 00:30:38,922 well, he's an alcoholic. 822 00:30:38,924 --> 00:30:40,807 I know. I'm not supposed to tell people, 823 00:30:40,809 --> 00:30:42,158 but this is an emergency. 824 00:30:43,509 --> 00:30:46,548 Uh, okay. What makes you think he's drinking again? 825 00:30:47,445 --> 00:30:50,496 Because I told him the truth about you and me. 826 00:30:50,975 --> 00:30:52,642 You did what? 827 00:31:01,791 --> 00:31:04,845 Josh, you-you told Greg about us? 828 00:31:05,158 --> 00:31:07,805 Remember, you and I decided it was wrong to have sex, 829 00:31:07,830 --> 00:31:11,298 - because Greg didn't know about us. - Uh-huh. 830 00:31:11,323 --> 00:31:13,510 So when I found out about the alcoholic thing, 831 00:31:13,535 --> 00:31:16,224 I decided I was definitely not gonna tell Greg. 832 00:31:16,249 --> 00:31:17,025 Yeah. 833 00:31:17,050 --> 00:31:18,447 And then I told Greg. 834 00:31:18,472 --> 00:31:19,572 Oh. 835 00:31:20,495 --> 00:31:21,844 Okay, um... 836 00:31:22,837 --> 00:31:23,961 How did he take it? 837 00:31:23,963 --> 00:31:25,262 Guess not great, 838 00:31:25,264 --> 00:31:26,283 'cause he's disappeared. 839 00:31:26,308 --> 00:31:28,726 Yeah. Good job, you horny monsters. 840 00:31:29,119 --> 00:31:30,217 Oh, I'm sorry. 841 00:31:30,219 --> 00:31:31,275 That sound judgy? 842 00:31:31,595 --> 00:31:32,579 Good. 843 00:31:32,604 --> 00:31:34,876 - Just, not now, Chiphunk. - Chiphunk? 844 00:31:34,914 --> 00:31:37,197 She thinks you look like a giant buff chipmunk. 845 00:31:37,837 --> 00:31:38,953 I'll take it. 846 00:31:38,978 --> 00:31:41,144 Okay, maybe we're overreacting. Maybe Greg's fine. 847 00:31:41,146 --> 00:31:42,529 Yes. Yeah, yeah. 848 00:31:42,531 --> 00:31:44,147 - He said he was fine, like, ten times. - WHITE JOSH: Guys, guys. 849 00:31:44,149 --> 00:31:45,565 You know that when Greg says he's fine, 850 00:31:45,567 --> 00:31:46,867 that's when he's not fine. 851 00:31:46,869 --> 00:31:48,869 - You know that. - HECTOR: Maybe they're right. 852 00:31:48,871 --> 00:31:50,287 Maybe Greg is fine. 853 00:31:50,289 --> 00:31:51,822 He'll just have a few and sleep it off. 854 00:31:52,324 --> 00:31:53,556 One rule! 855 00:31:53,771 --> 00:31:56,071 Oh! That's the rule! 856 00:31:56,378 --> 00:31:59,814 Okay. Yeah. We should definitely find him right now. 857 00:31:59,853 --> 00:32:01,436 Home Base is closed. 858 00:32:01,438 --> 00:32:04,117 So if he's out there getting messed up and drinking again, he won't be there. 859 00:32:04,142 --> 00:32:06,033 I could try the beer garden on East Cameron. 860 00:32:06,204 --> 00:32:07,603 I'll try the gastropub on East Cameron. 861 00:32:07,628 --> 00:32:09,704 - Should we carpool? - Smart. 862 00:32:09,889 --> 00:32:11,389 Okay, okay. And where should I go? 863 00:32:11,414 --> 00:32:12,746 - A-a-and where should I go? - WHITE JOSH: No! 864 00:32:12,771 --> 00:32:14,271 Not you two. 865 00:32:14,471 --> 00:32:15,970 You stay away. 866 00:32:16,114 --> 00:32:17,533 (sighs) 867 00:32:18,174 --> 00:32:20,820 Well, I can stay here in case he shows up. 868 00:32:20,845 --> 00:32:22,742 - That's smart. - Thanks. 869 00:32:22,767 --> 00:32:24,045 I was a Boy Scout for years. 870 00:32:24,650 --> 00:32:26,721 I've got to go find him. I-I can't stay here. 871 00:32:26,746 --> 00:32:28,446 Well, how are you gonna do that? 872 00:32:30,259 --> 00:32:33,133 Paula, thank you so much for helping me find Greg. 873 00:32:33,158 --> 00:32:35,208 PAULA: And... voilá! 874 00:32:35,210 --> 00:32:36,660 Wow! 875 00:32:37,349 --> 00:32:39,072 Intuition. 876 00:32:58,394 --> 00:33:00,004 What are you doing here? 877 00:33:01,333 --> 00:33:02,988 Everyone's looking for you. 878 00:33:05,051 --> 00:33:07,107 Not me. I wasn't looking for you. 879 00:33:07,109 --> 00:33:08,410 I just like ducks. 880 00:33:12,863 --> 00:33:16,793 Look, I know you know about... me and Josh. 881 00:33:18,465 --> 00:33:21,598 I'm sorry you found out the way you did. 882 00:33:21,623 --> 00:33:22,793 Um... 883 00:33:23,425 --> 00:33:25,457 I wanted to tell you myself, 884 00:33:26,357 --> 00:33:29,152 but I didn't know where you were. 885 00:33:30,099 --> 00:33:32,182 I got a single text from you 886 00:33:32,184 --> 00:33:35,027 and then you disappeared for a month. 887 00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:38,207 Yeah. 888 00:33:39,277 --> 00:33:41,108 I was embarrassed. 889 00:33:41,558 --> 00:33:43,137 I'm sure you heard. 890 00:33:44,279 --> 00:33:46,646 DUI, alcoholic, blah, blah, blah. 891 00:33:46,648 --> 00:33:50,418 I heard. Yeah. I'm... I'm sorry. 892 00:33:52,067 --> 00:33:54,121 I really have been doing a lot better. 893 00:33:56,992 --> 00:33:59,113 But then I heard about you and Chan. 894 00:33:59,628 --> 00:34:02,948 And... you had a drink? 895 00:34:02,973 --> 00:34:05,132 No, no. I didn't. I wanted to. 896 00:34:05,134 --> 00:34:07,019 I thought about it. I almost did. 897 00:34:07,219 --> 00:34:09,027 I picked out a drink, 898 00:34:09,304 --> 00:34:11,902 and a glass, and ice. 899 00:34:12,391 --> 00:34:15,848 And instead, I hit a wall. 900 00:34:16,929 --> 00:34:18,762 Literally. (gasps) 901 00:34:18,764 --> 00:34:20,424 - Punched the hell out of a wall. - Oh, my God. 902 00:34:20,449 --> 00:34:21,410 - Oh, ouch. - Yeah. 903 00:34:21,435 --> 00:34:22,600 No, no. I'm okay. 904 00:34:22,625 --> 00:34:23,809 It's actually good. 905 00:34:24,153 --> 00:34:28,438 At least I didn't use alcohol to block an emotion. 906 00:34:31,554 --> 00:34:32,629 Look. 907 00:34:33,785 --> 00:34:36,580 At... the night of the wedding, 908 00:34:36,582 --> 00:34:39,449 you... completely broke my heart, 909 00:34:39,451 --> 00:34:43,253 but that's no excuse for me to be sleeping 910 00:34:43,255 --> 00:34:46,035 with your best friend, and I'm so sorry. 911 00:34:46,292 --> 00:34:48,230 I don't need an apology from you. 912 00:34:48,710 --> 00:34:52,546 Rebecca, when I first met you, I said, 913 00:34:52,548 --> 00:34:56,349 "You're ignoring me, so you're obviously my type." 914 00:34:56,351 --> 00:34:58,480 I picked you because you weren't interested in me. 915 00:34:58,887 --> 00:35:00,832 (laughs) 916 00:35:01,390 --> 00:35:03,557 That's funny, because by the end of the wedding, 917 00:35:03,559 --> 00:35:05,225 you weren't interested in me. 918 00:35:05,227 --> 00:35:06,443 The funny thing is, 919 00:35:06,445 --> 00:35:08,394 and not "ha-ha" funny, sad funny, 920 00:35:10,399 --> 00:35:15,202 the reason I got a DUI... was because I was driving over 921 00:35:15,204 --> 00:35:18,121 the next morning to tell you that I loved you. 922 00:35:19,144 --> 00:35:21,824 But... I blew my shot. 923 00:35:22,887 --> 00:35:24,285 And that's my fault. 924 00:35:25,380 --> 00:35:27,309 Life went on without me, and... 925 00:35:28,300 --> 00:35:29,801 You and Josh... 926 00:35:31,670 --> 00:35:33,465 You should be happy together. 927 00:35:34,423 --> 00:35:35,922 You're happy, right? 928 00:35:36,543 --> 00:35:38,121 And he treats you well? 929 00:35:38,291 --> 00:35:39,668 Um... 930 00:35:40,596 --> 00:35:41,934 Yes. 931 00:35:44,266 --> 00:35:46,098 Then everything worked out fine. 932 00:35:49,104 --> 00:35:50,816 Wow. You're like... 933 00:35:52,059 --> 00:35:54,762 you're like this new enlightened person. 934 00:35:55,244 --> 00:35:56,926 Not really; not yet. 935 00:35:57,356 --> 00:35:59,690 Someday, I hope. (chuckles) 936 00:36:01,950 --> 00:36:03,333 Hey! Rebecca. 937 00:36:03,335 --> 00:36:05,418 Sorry. I need a ride back to Torrance. 938 00:36:05,420 --> 00:36:07,402 Yeah. Hold on a second. 939 00:36:07,857 --> 00:36:10,074 - Greg, this is Xiao. - Hi. 940 00:36:10,099 --> 00:36:12,069 We are wearing matching outfits... 941 00:36:12,094 --> 00:36:13,593 Oh, no, no. I don't... 942 00:36:13,595 --> 00:36:14,878 I-I don't need to know. It's fine. 943 00:36:15,598 --> 00:36:16,824 - Hi. - Hi. 944 00:36:25,434 --> 00:36:27,215 Here's the letter you asked for. 945 00:36:27,415 --> 00:36:29,748 I should have written it the second you asked for it, 946 00:36:29,773 --> 00:36:31,051 so please forgive me 947 00:36:31,076 --> 00:36:33,026 and my garbage self. 948 00:36:33,535 --> 00:36:36,129 Oh, Rebecca. 949 00:36:37,146 --> 00:36:40,447 You know that I thought for a second, maybe you thought, 950 00:36:40,449 --> 00:36:42,426 that me going to law school was ridiculous. 951 00:36:43,001 --> 00:36:44,121 What? 952 00:36:44,630 --> 00:36:47,704 No. No, no... Oh, no. 953 00:36:47,706 --> 00:36:50,410 I'm so sorry that you-you thought that for even a second. 954 00:36:50,743 --> 00:36:53,129 Paula, you are so brave. 955 00:36:54,830 --> 00:36:57,355 I had a conversation with someone recently... 956 00:36:58,088 --> 00:36:59,535 It was Greg, it was last night, 957 00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:00,863 it was at a duck pond... 958 00:37:01,666 --> 00:37:06,049 And it made me realize that changing your life... is hard 959 00:37:06,671 --> 00:37:08,869 and you deserve support. 960 00:37:09,143 --> 00:37:11,393 I-I want to be there for you. 961 00:37:15,057 --> 00:37:16,783 Don't read it in front of me. I'll get embarrassed. 962 00:37:16,808 --> 00:37:19,475 Oh, my God. This is so sweet. 963 00:37:19,850 --> 00:37:20,963 Oh! 964 00:37:21,549 --> 00:37:22,902 Oh, the part... 965 00:37:22,904 --> 00:37:24,270 It's true. It's all true. 966 00:37:24,272 --> 00:37:26,522 You're the greatest person I've ever met. 967 00:37:27,707 --> 00:37:29,751 Cookie. Oh! 968 00:37:29,776 --> 00:37:32,171 This is a... beautiful letter, 969 00:37:32,196 --> 00:37:33,611 and I will, 970 00:37:33,864 --> 00:37:35,864 I will treasure it forever. 971 00:37:37,189 --> 00:37:39,084 But I had to turn in Darryl's letter 972 00:37:39,086 --> 00:37:41,203 - because he gave it to me on time. - Oh, my God. 973 00:37:41,205 --> 00:37:43,111 - I'm so sorry. - You know what? Don't be. 974 00:37:43,136 --> 00:37:46,804 His letter was... not terrible. 975 00:37:47,011 --> 00:37:49,049 Best friends for life. 976 00:37:49,074 --> 00:37:51,025 (clattering) 977 00:37:58,174 --> 00:38:00,105 What the hell are these? 978 00:38:00,107 --> 00:38:02,942 These are the most expensive donuts in the city. 979 00:38:02,944 --> 00:38:05,477 Gourmet donuts from the new place on East Cameron. 980 00:38:05,479 --> 00:38:07,563 (sighs) We like our usual place. 981 00:38:08,033 --> 00:38:10,449 And you got one dinosaur-shaped donut? 982 00:38:10,588 --> 00:38:12,534 What are we supposed to do with that, fight over it? 983 00:38:12,536 --> 00:38:14,236 I was trying to make it up to you. 984 00:38:14,238 --> 00:38:16,905 Next time, just get what you're supposed to get. 985 00:38:16,907 --> 00:38:19,525 Better yet, just show up. 986 00:38:20,369 --> 00:38:21,877 I think I can do that. 987 00:38:21,978 --> 00:38:23,392 I hope I can. 988 00:38:23,417 --> 00:38:27,335 Now, let's split this adorable dinosaur before people see it. 989 00:38:27,845 --> 00:38:29,802 Oh, you get the butt. 990 00:38:29,804 --> 00:38:31,086 Yeah. 991 00:38:31,416 --> 00:38:33,955 (lasers shooting in game) 992 00:38:33,980 --> 00:38:35,563 So he wasn't getting drunk. 993 00:38:35,869 --> 00:38:39,799 He was just sitting there on a bench with a box of donuts? 994 00:38:39,824 --> 00:38:41,283 Yeah. He was fine. 995 00:38:42,767 --> 00:38:44,767 He was great, actually. 996 00:38:44,769 --> 00:38:47,814 He's like... he's learning to process things differently. 997 00:38:49,416 --> 00:38:51,291 He actually seemed like he was in a great place. 998 00:38:51,609 --> 00:38:52,877 Oh, whew. 999 00:38:52,902 --> 00:38:55,269 Man, I am so relieved. 1000 00:38:55,294 --> 00:38:56,619 That is so good. 1001 00:38:56,644 --> 00:38:58,060 So, uh, hey. 1002 00:38:58,085 --> 00:39:00,176 It-it all kind of worked out. 1003 00:39:00,201 --> 00:39:01,367 Totally. 1004 00:39:01,369 --> 00:39:02,451 Hey, you said you love video games. 1005 00:39:02,453 --> 00:39:03,502 Do you want to get in here? 1006 00:39:03,642 --> 00:39:05,587 Um, I'm not feeling 1007 00:39:05,589 --> 00:39:06,986 the video games right now. 1008 00:39:08,158 --> 00:39:09,508 Actually, I lied to you. 1009 00:39:09,510 --> 00:39:11,293 I don't, I don't like video games. 1010 00:39:11,295 --> 00:39:13,679 Just like you lied about Ping-Pong? 1011 00:39:13,681 --> 00:39:16,424 (laughing): What was that about? 1012 00:39:18,174 --> 00:39:20,900 I was trying to spend time with you, Josh. 1013 00:39:21,328 --> 00:39:23,525 That's what the whole stupid Ping-Pong thing was about. 1014 00:39:23,974 --> 00:39:25,941 (sighs) 1015 00:39:25,943 --> 00:39:27,924 You know what, Josh? You live here. 1016 00:39:28,101 --> 00:39:30,447 You do, and you can tell yourself whatever, 1017 00:39:30,472 --> 00:39:33,978 but... I deserve to be with someone who treats me well. 1018 00:39:35,111 --> 00:39:36,205 Okay. 1019 00:39:37,916 --> 00:39:39,488 Wow. 1020 00:39:40,324 --> 00:39:41,845 Yeah. Whew. Wow. 1021 00:39:41,870 --> 00:39:42,908 Okay, yeah. 1022 00:39:42,933 --> 00:39:43,861 Yeah. 1023 00:39:44,995 --> 00:39:46,995 (sighs) 1024 00:40:03,224 --> 00:40:05,474 ♪ ♪ 1025 00:40:32,676 --> 00:40:33,926 Oh. Hi, ma'am. 1026 00:40:33,928 --> 00:40:35,260 Ma'am, excuse me. You're on the ball. 1027 00:40:35,262 --> 00:40:37,513 Just... no, it's right... Okay, so just move your foot 1028 00:40:37,515 --> 00:40:40,048 (laughing): this way... this shouldn't be this hard; this is funny. 1029 00:40:40,050 --> 00:40:42,634 Okay, no. Your skirt is just so voluminous. 1030 00:40:42,636 --> 00:40:44,553 It's like you're in the 18th century. 1031 00:40:44,555 --> 00:40:45,721 I don't even know where the ball is any... 1032 00:40:45,723 --> 00:40:47,890 Oh! Okay. You kicked it. 1033 00:40:47,892 --> 00:40:49,057 Also, you're not wearing any underwear. 1034 00:40:49,059 --> 00:40:50,275 Have a great day. Okay. 1035 00:40:50,277 --> 00:40:52,277 Oh. 1036 00:40:52,600 --> 00:40:54,300 Hi. Sir, sir. 1037 00:40:54,325 --> 00:40:56,908 So... Oh! There's her underwear. 1038 00:40:57,056 --> 00:41:02,002 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 73998

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