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[ Announcer ]Futurama is brought to you by:
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00:00:05,551 --> 00:00:08,654
The only teeth strong enough to eat other teeth.
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00:00:08,689 --> 00:00:10,862
[ Crunching ]
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00:00:13,827 --> 00:00:16,137
[ Man ] One, two! One, two, three!
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00:00:41,930 --> 00:00:45,240
Good news, everyone.
Today marks our dear friend...
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00:00:45,274 --> 00:00:48,551
Dr. Zoidberg's tenth year
with Planet Express.
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00:00:48,585 --> 00:00:52,103
- Huzzahs are in order!
- [ Lackadaisically ]
Huzzah. Huzzah.
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00:00:52,137 --> 00:00:55,448
Hooray for me!
Hooray for Zoidberg!
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00:00:55,481 --> 00:00:57,551
I will now read
the mandatory speech.
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00:00:57,585 --> 00:01:03,551
"Dear Employee:
Has it really been five,
ten or 15 years?
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00:01:03,585 --> 00:01:06,379
If not, please disregard this
and get back to work."
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00:01:06,412 --> 00:01:09,171
Distribute
token of appreciation
and applaud.
13
00:01:10,930 --> 00:01:13,034
Look! Coupons!
14
00:01:13,067 --> 00:01:16,000
I can get two oil changes
for the price of one!
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00:01:16,033 --> 00:01:18,033
Now if I could
only afford the one.
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00:01:18,067 --> 00:01:20,896
And the car.
Ah, the years.
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00:01:20,930 --> 00:01:23,000
So many memories.
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00:01:23,033 --> 00:01:26,757
So many strange fluids gushing
out of patients' bodies.
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00:01:26,793 --> 00:01:30,171
Yes, yes. Now here's
your pension statement.
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00:01:30,206 --> 00:01:33,448
It's empty because you haven't paid into it, you dumb stinkbug!
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00:01:33,481 --> 00:01:36,378
[ Sobs ]
You kept track of it
all these years.
22
00:01:36,412 --> 00:01:39,206
- [ Hermes Grunts ]
- Oh, no! I'm boned!
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00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:41,240
I haven't paid into
the pension, either.
24
00:01:41,275 --> 00:01:43,930
- What'll I do when I retire?
- I thought you wereretired.
25
00:01:43,965 --> 00:01:46,275
Hey, I don't see you
planning for your old age.
26
00:01:46,310 --> 00:01:50,171
I got plans.
I'm gonna turn my
on/off switch to off.
27
00:01:50,206 --> 00:01:53,861
Well, I'm gonna take action.
It's time to check on
my retirement fund.
28
00:01:55,655 --> 00:01:58,481
Damn. Still only
a hundred dollars.
29
00:01:58,516 --> 00:02:01,206
A penny saved
is a penny earned.
30
00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:03,757
Also, could you get
some athlete's foot cream
for my face?
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00:02:03,793 --> 00:02:06,861
He's right. I've got to start
investing wisely.
32
00:02:08,931 --> 00:02:10,586
Well, down to
my last lottery ticket.
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00:02:11,586 --> 00:02:13,723
[ Sniffs ]
Cherry.
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00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:16,137
[ Sniffs ]
Cherry!
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00:02:16,171 --> 00:02:18,137
[ Sniffs ]
Mule. Crud!
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00:02:18,171 --> 00:02:20,965
So, you got six bucks
left to retire on.
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00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,000
I recommend
Tender Vittles.
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00:02:25,171 --> 00:02:28,413
[ Woman ] You're opening a retirement account for six dollars?
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00:02:28,448 --> 00:02:31,758
I'm sure a wealthy--
[ Sniffs ]-- mule farmer
like yourself...
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00:02:31,793 --> 00:02:34,240
is aware that we charge
a ten dollar monthly fee.
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00:02:34,275 --> 00:02:36,930
- You gotta spend money
to make money.
- [ Clicking, Beeping ]
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00:02:36,965 --> 00:02:40,965
Here you are, sir.
Your account is now overdrawn
by four dollars.
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00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,655
Geez.
I've seen lines move faster
in the sperm bank.
44
00:02:44,688 --> 00:02:49,033
That's for su--
Roberto, is that you?Bender! Hey, man!
45
00:02:49,067 --> 00:02:51,033
[ Banging ][ Both Laughing ]
46
00:02:51,067 --> 00:02:53,275
[ Squeaking ][ Stammering, Laughing ]
47
00:02:53,310 --> 00:02:55,448
You old lunatic!
How ya been?
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00:02:55,481 --> 00:02:59,930
Ah, not bad. Not bad.
Everybody on the floor![ Screaming ]
49
00:02:59,965 --> 00:03:03,275
- This is a stickup!
- [ Screaming ]
- Ahhh!
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00:03:03,310 --> 00:03:07,655
Yeah, I'm doin' okay too.
I'm takin' a Chinese cooking
class at the Learning Annex.
51
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,655
Cool. C-Can you
give me a hand here?
52
00:03:09,688 --> 00:03:11,758
Sure thing, pal. [ Rustling ]
53
00:03:11,793 --> 00:03:14,586
Hey, you! Red!
Quit waterin' that plant
and get the door!
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00:03:14,620 --> 00:03:17,516
- [ Gasping ]
- [ Woman Cries Out ]
55
00:03:17,550 --> 00:03:21,310
Well, nice talkin' to ya.Same here.
You guys are all right.
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00:03:21,343 --> 00:03:25,137
- Here's somethin'
for your trouble.
- Hey, thanks, buddy!
57
00:03:25,171 --> 00:03:29,586
- [ Sirens Warbling ]
- [ Grunting ]
58
00:03:29,620 --> 00:03:32,688
- Freeze, punks!
You're under arrest!
- Shoot 'em in the back!
59
00:03:32,723 --> 00:03:35,861
Quick,
while they're not looking! [ Buzzing ]
60
00:03:39,723 --> 00:03:43,896
Court is in session. The Honorable Judge Whitey presiding.
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00:03:43,930 --> 00:03:45,896
The charge is bank robbery.
62
00:03:45,930 --> 00:03:49,206
Now, my caddy's chauffeur
informs me that...
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00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:53,655
a bank is a place
where people put money
that isn't properly invested.
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00:03:53,688 --> 00:03:58,965
Therefore, robbing a bank
is tantamount to that most
heinous of crimes--
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00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:01,068
theft of money.
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00:04:01,103 --> 00:04:04,516
As the "surveilliance"
camera for that bank...
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00:04:04,550 --> 00:04:06,931
what all the judge
was a-jawin' about,
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00:04:06,965 --> 00:04:10,516
could y'all tell us
what you done seen
the day of the crime?
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00:04:10,550 --> 00:04:13,586
Well, let's see.
My memory's a little fuzzy,
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00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:16,274
but it went
exactly like this.
[ Whirring ]
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00:04:17,343 --> 00:04:20,723
- [ Fry Gasps ]
- [ All Gasping ]
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00:04:20,757 --> 00:04:23,826
Your Honor, I move
that I be disbarred...
73
00:04:23,862 --> 00:04:28,793
for introducin'
this evidence against
my own clients.
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00:04:28,826 --> 00:04:34,550
Mr. Fry, do you recognize the robot a-huggin' on you in this here hologram?
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00:04:34,586 --> 00:04:37,033
I sure do!
That's the real robber!
76
00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:39,481
And I'll never forget
his name as long as I live.
77
00:04:39,516 --> 00:04:43,516
And that name is--
[ Gasps ]
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00:04:43,550 --> 00:04:46,447
[ Gags, Coughing ]
79
00:04:46,481 --> 00:04:50,965
Fry, just give a name!
You don't want to look stupid
on Court TV!
80
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:53,033
You're right.
You're right.
It was--
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00:04:53,067 --> 00:04:57,274
[ Cell Phone Ringing ]Yes? What?
82
00:04:57,310 --> 00:05:00,172
You say if I testify
I'll be killed?
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00:05:00,206 --> 00:05:03,482
Oh, it's for you.
84
00:05:03,516 --> 00:05:07,274
And the other hamburger
will also be made of your lungs.
85
00:05:07,310 --> 00:05:10,379
- So long, pal.
- [ Gulps ]
86
00:05:10,413 --> 00:05:14,516
I refuse to testify
on the grounds that my organs
will be chopped up into a patty.
87
00:05:14,550 --> 00:05:16,896
Ah, the 67th Amendment.
88
00:05:16,930 --> 00:05:20,000
I may be a simple
country hyper-chicken,
89
00:05:20,033 --> 00:05:22,103
but I know when
we're finger-licked.
90
00:05:22,137 --> 00:05:24,172
What do you say
we plead insanity?
91
00:05:24,206 --> 00:05:28,067
A few months
in an insane asylum? I could
do that standin' on my head.
92
00:05:28,103 --> 00:05:31,033
If you start now,
it might help our case.
93
00:05:31,067 --> 00:05:33,757
Counselor,
what evidence do you offer...[ Clucking ]
94
00:05:33,793 --> 00:05:35,896
to support this new plea
of insanity?
95
00:05:35,930 --> 00:05:39,413
Well, for one,
they done hired me
to represent them.
96
00:05:39,447 --> 00:05:42,033
Insanity plea is accepted.
97
00:05:42,067 --> 00:05:44,516
Mr. Bender?
I hereby commit you...
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00:05:44,550 --> 00:05:47,172
to the asylum for
criminally insane robots...
99
00:05:47,206 --> 00:05:50,033
until such time
as you are deemed cured.
100
00:05:50,067 --> 00:05:53,620
Yahoo!
The system fails again!
101
00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:56,206
And Mr. Fry,
I sentence you...
102
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:58,930
to the home for
criminally insane humans.
103
00:05:58,965 --> 00:06:01,274
Your Honor,
that facility
has been full...
104
00:06:01,310 --> 00:06:04,757
ever since you ruled
that being poor
is a mental illness.
105
00:06:04,793 --> 00:06:07,723
Order! Order!
The only poor people
I want to hear about...
106
00:06:07,757 --> 00:06:10,586
are the people
who tend to my pores
at the spa.
107
00:06:10,620 --> 00:06:13,826
Just send them both
to the robot loony bin
and let's go.
108
00:06:14,896 --> 00:06:17,447
[ Both Grunt ]
109
00:06:20,654 --> 00:06:22,620
[ Whimpering ][ Protesting ]
110
00:06:22,654 --> 00:06:25,103
Huh?
111
00:06:25,137 --> 00:06:29,033
[ Fry ]
Ow, my head! Ow, my feet!
Ow, my head! Ow, my feet!
112
00:06:29,067 --> 00:06:31,274
Keep your chin up. [ Fry ]
Ow, my chin!
113
00:06:33,481 --> 00:06:35,723
[ Chirping ]
114
00:06:37,896 --> 00:06:40,930
[ Conveyor Belt Droning ]
115
00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:44,723
I don't belong here, Bender.
This is an asylum
for insane robots.
116
00:06:44,757 --> 00:06:48,723
Well, you meet
half the qualifications.
[ Laughs ]
117
00:06:49,793 --> 00:06:51,757
Oh, good!
A physical!
118
00:06:51,793 --> 00:06:54,757
Once they examine
my fragile, naked, pink body,
119
00:06:54,793 --> 00:06:58,137
they'll see
I'm not a-- Whoa--
120
00:06:59,310 --> 00:07:02,206
[ Fry Screaming ] [ Metal Rattling ]
121
00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:03,964
[ Machinery Whirring ]
122
00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:06,689
Wheee!
[ Giggles ]
123
00:07:07,620 --> 00:07:10,689
Ooh! Ahh!
Ooh! Wah! Ahhh!
124
00:07:10,723 --> 00:07:14,343
♪♪ [ Scat Singing ]
125
00:07:15,620 --> 00:07:18,793
[ Whirring ][ Screams ]
126
00:07:20,930 --> 00:07:23,067
♪♪ [ Scat Singing ][ Bat Squeaking ]
127
00:07:28,274 --> 00:07:30,310
What the--
[ Belch ]
128
00:07:30,343 --> 00:07:32,516
[ Bender ]
I find that offensive!
129
00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:39,067
[ Yelling, Grunt,
Agonized Groan ]
130
00:07:39,103 --> 00:07:42,172
Greetings.
I am Dr. Perceptron.
131
00:07:42,206 --> 00:07:44,826
Let me give you something
to help you relax.[ Beep ]
132
00:07:44,862 --> 00:07:49,481
- Yah-ahh!
- Look, there's been
a terrible mistake.
133
00:07:49,516 --> 00:07:52,274
I'm a human being. See?
I'm all squishy and flabby.
134
00:07:52,310 --> 00:07:55,343
- Also, I complain a lot.
- Yes, you do.
135
00:07:55,379 --> 00:07:57,481
You need to relax more.[ Screams ]
Wow!
136
00:07:57,516 --> 00:08:00,343
Terrific.
Now consider
the following.
137
00:08:00,379 --> 00:08:02,689
You were admitted
to this robot asylum.
138
00:08:02,723 --> 00:08:07,274
Therefore,
you must be a robot.
Diagnosis complete.
139
00:08:07,310 --> 00:08:10,481
I do other human stuff!
I age. See?
140
00:08:10,516 --> 00:08:13,137
[ Door Opens ]
141
00:08:13,172 --> 00:08:16,654
I'm Nurse Ratchet.
Please come with me,
won't you?
142
00:08:17,620 --> 00:08:21,172
- [ Grunts ]
- [ Ratcheting ]
143
00:08:23,343 --> 00:08:26,793
We'll meet your roommate
next, shall we?
144
00:08:26,826 --> 00:08:30,379
- His name is
Malfunctioning Eddie.
- The car dealer?
145
00:08:30,413 --> 00:08:32,654
Wow. I guess his prices
really were insane.
146
00:08:32,688 --> 00:08:37,240
He's very excitable.
So don't say anything
to surprise him.
147
00:08:37,274 --> 00:08:39,586
[ Rattling ]
148
00:08:39,620 --> 00:08:42,067
Pleased to meet you.Actually,
we've met once before.
149
00:08:42,102 --> 00:08:44,551
What?
150
00:08:52,413 --> 00:08:55,551
I'm a pretty girl.
I'm a pretty girl.
151
00:08:55,586 --> 00:08:57,551
I'ma pretty girl.
152
00:08:57,586 --> 00:09:00,000
Wh-Whoa!
Someone had a busy day!
153
00:09:00,033 --> 00:09:03,274
My roommate exploded.
Oh, you gotta help me,
Bender.
154
00:09:03,309 --> 00:09:06,793
How can I prove I'm human?You could drop dead.
That'd show 'em.
155
00:09:06,826 --> 00:09:10,517
I don't wanna! Hey, man! I believe
you're a human.
156
00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:13,654
You do?Sure. They don't believe
I'm a human either.
157
00:09:13,688 --> 00:09:17,551
Name's Unit 2013.
Come on. Let me
introduce you around.
158
00:09:17,586 --> 00:09:20,826
Fry, meet Norm.
How's it goin', pal?
159
00:09:20,861 --> 00:09:23,586
Still pickin' up transmissions
from the C.I.A. on your teeth?
160
00:09:23,620 --> 00:09:26,620
They just won't stop!
161
00:09:26,654 --> 00:09:32,309
[ Woman ] The C.I.A.
Cafeteria menu for the week
of May 15 is as follows.
162
00:09:32,344 --> 00:09:34,447
Monday,
shepherd's pie.
163
00:09:34,481 --> 00:09:36,861
Tues--Cuckoo.
164
00:09:36,895 --> 00:09:39,793
Let me guess.
He thinks he's Lincoln?
165
00:09:39,826 --> 00:09:41,895
Well, he's supposed to.
The problem is,
166
00:09:41,931 --> 00:09:45,033
he's got multiple
personalities--
all of 'em Lincoln.
167
00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:50,172
[ Buzzing, Whirring ] I was
born in two hundred log cabins.
168
00:09:50,206 --> 00:09:52,309
And this here is Frankie.
169
00:09:52,344 --> 00:09:56,206
He's convinced he's a lunchroom
worker. So they put him to work
in the lunchroom.
170
00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:59,000
How is workin'
the lunchroom, Frankie?
171
00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:02,931
- It's all right.
- Poor Frankie.
172
00:10:04,172 --> 00:10:07,447
[ Whirring ]
173
00:10:07,481 --> 00:10:10,000
Change places!
174
00:10:10,033 --> 00:10:12,654
[ Clattering ][ Grunting ]
175
00:10:12,688 --> 00:10:14,688
Bender, I can't take
much more of this.
176
00:10:14,724 --> 00:10:18,033
- I want outta here!
- Are you crazy?
This place is great.
177
00:10:18,067 --> 00:10:21,688
Electroshock
whenever you want it.
Two Lincolns for every Napoleon.
178
00:10:21,724 --> 00:10:23,826
[ Loud Slurp ]
Ahhh!
179
00:10:23,861 --> 00:10:26,206
Sweet light crude.
180
00:10:27,931 --> 00:10:31,724
But I'm not a robot like you!
I don't like having disks
crammed into me.
181
00:10:31,758 --> 00:10:34,206
Unless they're Oreos.
And then only in the mouth.
182
00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:36,206
Don't you understand?
I'm gonna die here.
183
00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:39,379
Ah, quit your belly-achin'
and take it like a robot.
184
00:10:39,413 --> 00:10:41,136
[ Frustrated Growl ]
185
00:10:41,172 --> 00:10:43,136
[ Mad Hatter ] Change places!
186
00:10:43,172 --> 00:10:46,344
[ Grunting ]
187
00:10:48,931 --> 00:10:52,826
The doctor says
you are making great strides
with your exploding problem.
188
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:55,379
Well, the way I see it--
189
00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:59,481
You gotta get me outta here.
I would have
starved to death...
190
00:10:59,517 --> 00:11:01,758
if not for that sick
vending machine robot.
191
00:11:01,793 --> 00:11:03,620
[ Coughing ]
192
00:11:03,654 --> 00:11:07,379
Gimme! Gimme!
[ Blubbering ]
193
00:11:07,413 --> 00:11:10,861
Poor Fry.
He's got the munchies
for freedom.
194
00:11:10,895 --> 00:11:14,000
We're all trying to help you.
We've petitioned the governor.
195
00:11:14,033 --> 00:11:17,309
But he doesn't want
to appear soft on people
who've been falsely imprisoned.
196
00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:21,344
[ Groans ] At least
I have friends on the outside.
Bender's been no help at all.
197
00:11:21,379 --> 00:11:23,379
[ Speaks French ]
Je suis Napoleon!
198
00:11:23,413 --> 00:11:27,000
[ Chuckles ]
Now, seriously, I'm not.
199
00:11:27,033 --> 00:11:30,240
Bender, you should be more
ashamed of yourself than usual.
200
00:11:30,274 --> 00:11:34,793
Ah, lighten up, honey.
I'm just tryin' to get through
a difficult time using humor.
201
00:11:34,826 --> 00:11:39,793
Visiting hours are over.
Time for our medication disks.
202
00:11:39,826 --> 00:11:42,309
Help me!
For God's sake,
help me!
203
00:11:42,344 --> 00:11:44,481
Oh, don't worry, Fry.
204
00:11:44,517 --> 00:11:48,447
I, too, once spent
a nightmarish time
in a robot asylum.
205
00:11:48,481 --> 00:11:51,000
But now,
it's nearly over.
So long.
206
00:11:52,895 --> 00:11:56,413
[ Crickets Chirping Madly ]
207
00:11:56,447 --> 00:11:59,240
Thirty days hath September,
April, June-- And no wonder
all the rest have peanut butter.
208
00:11:59,274 --> 00:12:02,206
- What am I gonna do?
- [ Whirring ]
209
00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:06,172
Oh, God! What? What?
What is it now?
210
00:12:06,206 --> 00:12:10,309
- You are being released.
- Finally! Sweet justice!
211
00:12:10,344 --> 00:12:14,654
- Sweet, juicy justice!
- Not you. Him.
212
00:12:14,688 --> 00:12:18,620
Me? What a surprise!
213
00:12:19,688 --> 00:12:22,586
Look!
I barely exploded at all.
214
00:12:22,620 --> 00:12:25,206
We can control that
with medication.
215
00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:28,931
Fry? Are we ready
to meet our new roommate?
216
00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:31,240
[ Bumping, Creaking ]
217
00:12:33,517 --> 00:12:35,379
- [ Gasps ]
- Hi, Red!
218
00:12:35,413 --> 00:12:38,102
Roberto?
Wh-Wh-Wh-What are you
doing here?
219
00:12:38,136 --> 00:12:40,447
I got busted robbin'
that bank again.
220
00:12:40,481 --> 00:12:42,586
Why would you hold up
the same bank twice?
221
00:12:42,620 --> 00:12:46,517
Ah, that first time
was just to case the joint
and rob it a little.
222
00:12:46,551 --> 00:12:48,793
What's the matter?
You scared?
223
00:12:48,826 --> 00:12:52,551
[ Stammering ]
N-N-- N-N-N-N--Noticeably? I'll say.
224
00:12:52,586 --> 00:12:55,447
Now, stand back.
I gotta practice
my stabbin'.
225
00:12:55,481 --> 00:12:58,102
Ha-haa!
Ha-ha-ha. Ha-haa!No! Please! Help!
226
00:12:58,136 --> 00:13:01,309
Stop it! Police! [ Pounding ]
227
00:13:01,344 --> 00:13:04,688
Hey, keep it down in there! I'm tunin' my banjo!
228
00:13:04,724 --> 00:13:08,413
- ♪♪ [ Plucking Strings ]
- Geez, Red. Quit cowerin'.
229
00:13:08,447 --> 00:13:11,172
You call yourself
a robot?
230
00:13:11,206 --> 00:13:13,379
[ Howling Yells ]
231
00:13:13,413 --> 00:13:16,586
I'm not a robot!
I'm not a robot!
232
00:13:16,620 --> 00:13:18,758
[ Screams ]
233
00:13:21,481 --> 00:13:23,724
In answer
to your question,
Hermes.
234
00:13:23,758 --> 00:13:25,724
Yes, your friend
is cured.
235
00:13:25,758 --> 00:13:27,758
[ All Exclaiming ]
236
00:13:27,793 --> 00:13:31,965
[ Perceptron ] You'll notice he no longer suffers delusions of humanity.
237
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:35,000
Affirmative.
I feel nothing.
I am a robot.
238
00:13:35,033 --> 00:13:37,895
Beep, beep,
beep, beep, beep--[ Dismayed Gasping ]
239
00:13:37,931 --> 00:13:42,000
You've made a terrible mistake.
He's a human being,
not a machine!
240
00:13:42,033 --> 00:13:45,136
Oh, Fry![ Beeping Quickens ]
241
00:13:45,172 --> 00:13:50,413
♪♪ [ Banjo ]♪ Gonna sing a little tale about
a battle called Waterloo ♪♪
242
00:13:50,447 --> 00:13:52,724
Bonjour,y'all!
243
00:13:57,033 --> 00:14:01,551
Listen to me, Fry. Just because
you think you're a robot,
doesn't make you a robot.
244
00:14:01,586 --> 00:14:05,517
After all, I think
I'm a doctor, but that
doesn't make me a doctor.
245
00:14:05,551 --> 00:14:08,965
- These fancy clothes do.
- Negative. I must be a robot.
246
00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:13,620
Why else would human women
refuse to date me?Oh, lots of reasons.
247
00:14:13,654 --> 00:14:16,033
Bio-units,
terminate noise exchange.
248
00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:18,688
It is time for you to ingest
sandwiches from my compartment.
249
00:14:18,724 --> 00:14:22,033
[ Disgusted Groans ]
250
00:14:25,793 --> 00:14:29,654
Here we go.
Just a minute. Aha!
251
00:14:29,688 --> 00:14:32,758
[ Announcer ]
And down the stretch,
it's Daddy's Little Grandpa,
252
00:14:32,793 --> 00:14:36,931
followed by Perennial Loser
and bringing up the rear,
it's Lasty!
253
00:14:36,965 --> 00:14:40,240
Come on, Lasty! Hey, Bender.
254
00:14:40,274 --> 00:14:44,274
Duh, Roberto!
Ooh, what a surprise
to see you in here!
255
00:14:44,309 --> 00:14:46,688
Especially 'cause
I didn't squeal on ya,
remember?
256
00:14:46,724 --> 00:14:50,000
Remember all that
squealin' I didn't do?
Remember? Do ya?
257
00:14:50,033 --> 00:14:52,206
Yeah. Yeah.
Now lie down and play dead.
258
00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:55,379
And don't ham it up.Uh, sure.
Anything for you, buddy.
259
00:14:55,413 --> 00:14:57,274
[ Chuckles ]
Ooh.
[ Flap Whirs ]
260
00:14:59,551 --> 00:15:03,102
Wait here, Bender.
I need to get a disguise.
261
00:15:03,136 --> 00:15:06,447
[ Banging, Crashing ] [ Howling Yell ]
262
00:15:10,758 --> 00:15:14,724
[ Flap Whirs ]
Uh, what's
with the getup?
263
00:15:14,758 --> 00:15:17,033
I'm in disguise
'cause I'm thinkin'
of escapin'.
264
00:15:17,067 --> 00:15:20,033
You in? Or do I gotta
kill ya so ya don't squeal?
265
00:15:20,067 --> 00:15:22,206
I'm in! I'm in!
[ Nervous Chuckle ]
266
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:25,379
- So, when were you
plannin' the breakout?
- I'm thinkin'...
267
00:15:25,413 --> 00:15:28,758
maybe a few seconds ago. [ Siren Blaring ]
268
00:15:28,793 --> 00:15:32,033
Quick!
Let's keep escaping![ Grunting ]
269
00:15:32,067 --> 00:15:36,206
- [ Both Grunting ]
- [ Barking ]
270
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:39,206
[ Sniffing, Growling ]
271
00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:41,274
[ Grunting, Panting ]
272
00:15:42,861 --> 00:15:44,793
[ Both Yelling ]
273
00:15:57,447 --> 00:16:01,447
Times two,
carry the one.
274
00:16:01,481 --> 00:16:06,586
Oh, you sad,
worthless human.Ohh!
275
00:16:06,620 --> 00:16:10,000
Sacred hog of Prague!
That was my anniversary gift
to La Barbra.
276
00:16:10,033 --> 00:16:12,447
Fear not.
For I shall assist ye!
277
00:16:12,481 --> 00:16:15,965
Robots don't say "ye."Relax, mammal!
278
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:19,379
My robotic software
shall meet your
calculatory needs.
279
00:16:19,413 --> 00:16:21,620
What is the meaning
of this symbol?
280
00:16:21,654 --> 00:16:23,758
That's a plus sign,
you pointy-head loony!
281
00:16:23,793 --> 00:16:25,826
Quit thinkin'
you're a robot!
282
00:16:25,861 --> 00:16:29,965
- I'll show ye.
- [ Rattling ]
283
00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:31,931
[ Straining ]
284
00:16:36,517 --> 00:16:38,861
Stand back!
I'm a toolbot.
285
00:16:38,895 --> 00:16:40,826
[ Straining ]
286
00:16:44,481 --> 00:16:46,620
[ Straining ]
287
00:16:46,654 --> 00:16:49,206
You're not a toolbot.
You're not a food-motron.
288
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:51,274
You're not a robot
of any kind.
289
00:16:51,309 --> 00:16:55,895
Yes, I am.
I simply haven't discovered
my primary function yet.
290
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,895
- [ Grunts ]
- Okay. This has got to stop.
291
00:16:58,931 --> 00:17:01,724
I'm going to remind Fry
of his humanity...
292
00:17:01,758 --> 00:17:03,793
the way
only a woman can.
293
00:17:03,826 --> 00:17:06,378
You're going
to do his laundry?
294
00:17:06,413 --> 00:17:09,931
Fry,
this is for you.
295
00:17:09,964 --> 00:17:11,964
Mmm. Mmm.
296
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:13,931
Mmmmmm. Mwuh!
297
00:17:19,931 --> 00:17:22,619
Beep.Oh, for God's sake!
298
00:17:22,654 --> 00:17:25,205
[ Gulping, Sighs ]
299
00:17:26,586 --> 00:17:30,240
By a scallop's forelocks.
What's with all the beer, Fry?
300
00:17:30,275 --> 00:17:33,034
Alcohol
fuels my power cells.
301
00:17:33,067 --> 00:17:36,378
And as a mighty robot, I--
[ Belches ]
302
00:17:36,413 --> 00:17:39,862
[ Bottles Clattering ]Beep.
[ Snoring ]
303
00:17:39,895 --> 00:17:43,895
Thanks for helpin'
me escape, Bender.Ah, it was nothin'.
304
00:17:43,931 --> 00:17:47,034
It was not nothin'!
I want to repay you.
305
00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:49,723
Let me get you
somethin' in here.
306
00:17:51,136 --> 00:17:53,689
Hands up! This is
a stickup again![ People Gasping ]
307
00:17:53,723 --> 00:17:56,034
Wow!
Hitting the same place
three times?
308
00:17:56,067 --> 00:17:58,344
I admire your style,
Roberto.
309
00:17:58,378 --> 00:18:02,481
Give me the remainin' dough
and all the calendars.
And that pen!
310
00:18:02,517 --> 00:18:04,792
Try to tear it
so most of the beads
are on my end!
311
00:18:04,826 --> 00:18:07,448
[ Guns Cocking ]Police!
You're busted!
312
00:18:07,481 --> 00:18:09,689
And don't try anything.
This glass here is laser-proof.
313
00:18:09,723 --> 00:18:13,448
[ Martial Arts Yell ]Fire lasers!
314
00:18:13,481 --> 00:18:16,586
- Duck lasers!
- [ Bellowing ]
315
00:18:16,619 --> 00:18:19,964
Come on! I got a place
where I like to hide
after crimes.
316
00:18:24,586 --> 00:18:29,136
[ Snoring ]Aw, he looks like a little
insane drunken angel.
317
00:18:29,172 --> 00:18:31,205
[ Hydraulic Door Hissing ]
318
00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:35,067
[ Panting ]
Hey, everybody.
Meet my good pal, Roberto.
319
00:18:35,103 --> 00:18:37,792
- Hey, mon.
- Nice to meet you--
320
00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:40,517
[ Man On Bullhorn ] Come out with your hands up!hostages!
321
00:18:40,550 --> 00:18:43,758
[ Sirens Blaring ]
322
00:18:43,792 --> 00:18:47,826
- [ Brakes Screeching ]
- Back off! I got hostages!
323
00:18:47,862 --> 00:18:51,895
- Hooray! I'm helping.
- Do you have
any better hostages?
324
00:18:51,931 --> 00:18:55,172
To show them who's crazy,
I'll execute some of you.
325
00:18:55,205 --> 00:18:57,067
How about you?Ouch!
326
00:18:57,103 --> 00:18:59,826
That's going to bleed
when my heart beats.
327
00:18:59,862 --> 00:19:02,000
Wait! Take me first!
328
00:19:02,034 --> 00:19:04,931
- Yes! Take her first!
- Shut up!
329
00:19:04,964 --> 00:19:08,378
- Stop tellin' me
how to do this!
- [ Sirens Blaring ]
330
00:19:08,413 --> 00:19:11,413
[ Frightened Chatter ][ Zoidberg ]
Oh, the fear.
331
00:19:11,448 --> 00:19:13,550
I'm thinkin' of a number
between one and ten.
332
00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:16,448
Guess it,
and you die first.
Go!
333
00:19:16,481 --> 00:19:18,758
Um, okay.
334
00:19:18,792 --> 00:19:21,275
Fifty-- six-- ish?
335
00:19:21,309 --> 00:19:23,689
Fifty-six?
Fifty-six?
336
00:19:23,723 --> 00:19:26,413
Oh, man! Now that's
all I can think about!
337
00:19:26,448 --> 00:19:29,619
I'm gonna kill you, you--
you no good fifty-six-ing--
338
00:19:29,654 --> 00:19:33,205
- [ Howling ]
- [ Blubbering ]
339
00:19:34,862 --> 00:19:38,378
Don't kill me yet!
I'm startin' to come down
with Stockholm Syndrome,
340
00:19:38,413 --> 00:19:40,344
handsome.
341
00:19:41,723 --> 00:19:44,550
Halt, fellow robot!
342
00:19:44,586 --> 00:19:49,205
Hey, Red!
You're just in time to join
the hostage situation.
343
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,205
Which side
do you want to be on?
344
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:54,689
The side that kicks
your twisted metal ass.
345
00:19:54,723 --> 00:19:57,550
Fry! Stay back!
He's too powerful!
346
00:19:57,586 --> 00:19:59,689
Negative,
bossy meat creature.
347
00:19:59,723 --> 00:20:02,034
I know now what
my primary function is.
348
00:20:02,067 --> 00:20:05,619
I am a battle-droid,
sworn to protect the weak
from crazy robots.
349
00:20:05,654 --> 00:20:08,172
I'm not crazy!
Don't call me crazy!
350
00:20:08,205 --> 00:20:11,205
- I-I'm just not user-friendly.
- Fry, don't be a hero!
351
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,205
It's not covered
by the health plan!
352
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:16,344
Let's see how much
of a robot you really are--
353
00:20:16,378 --> 00:20:19,586
[ Martial Arts Yell ][ Squishes ]
354
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:21,586
[ Collective Gasp ]
355
00:20:21,619 --> 00:20:23,862
[ Metal Crackling ]
356
00:20:25,067 --> 00:20:28,517
No knife can penetrate
my skin-tanium armor.
357
00:20:28,550 --> 00:20:31,103
[ Imitates Robotic Drone ]
358
00:20:31,136 --> 00:20:34,964
He-- Help! Help!
He is a battle-droid!
359
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,964
[ Droning Continues ]Somebody help me!
360
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,654
[ Stammering ]
Mommy!
361
00:20:39,689 --> 00:20:42,448
I'm sorry I spilled
the transmission fluid,
Mommy.
362
00:20:42,481 --> 00:20:45,448
No, no! Don't weld me
to the wall, Mommy!
363
00:20:45,481 --> 00:20:47,654
- [ Grunts ]
- [ Droning ]
364
00:20:49,067 --> 00:20:51,034
[ Whimpering ]
365
00:20:51,067 --> 00:20:53,172
[ Screaming ]
366
00:20:55,550 --> 00:20:57,517
[ Whimpering ]
367
00:20:57,550 --> 00:21:00,481
[ Clinking ]We're willing to listen
to your demands.
368
00:21:02,275 --> 00:21:05,448
Hey, baby. Wash that off
before you put it back.
369
00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:07,723
[ Hostages ]
Hooray![ Zoidberg ] Bravo!
370
00:21:07,758 --> 00:21:10,517
You did it, Fry.Congratulations, buddy.
371
00:21:10,550 --> 00:21:12,654
You're a credit
to my race.
372
00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:15,172
It was nothing. I--
[ Screams ]
373
00:21:16,826 --> 00:21:20,034
Blood?
Robots don't have blood.
374
00:21:20,067 --> 00:21:22,517
- I must be a-- a--
- A squid?
375
00:21:22,550 --> 00:21:25,481
A human!
Oh, my God!
376
00:21:25,517 --> 00:21:27,517
I'm a human!Also good.
377
00:21:30,654 --> 00:21:32,689
Thanks
for saving us, Fry.
378
00:21:32,723 --> 00:21:37,103
[ Kiss ]I'm gonna continue
never washing this cheek again.
379
00:21:37,136 --> 00:21:40,413
Buddy,
you may be wrapped
in greasy skin,
380
00:21:40,448 --> 00:21:43,378
but inside you've got
the heart of a robot.
381
00:21:43,413 --> 00:21:46,654
Aw,
thanks, Bender.Just like inside me,
382
00:21:46,689 --> 00:21:48,654
I've got the heart
of a human.
383
00:21:48,689 --> 00:21:52,000
[ Disgusted Groans ]What?
384
00:21:53,689 --> 00:21:55,619
[ Bender ] What?
31017
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