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1
00:00:54,419 --> 00:00:57,983
This is a story about a man
named Harold Crick.
2
00:00:58,122 --> 00:01:00,352
And his wristwatch.
3
00:01:00,925 --> 00:01:03,788
Harold Crick was a man
of infinite numbers…
4
00:01:03,828 --> 00:01:07,491
…endless calculations
and remarkably few words.
5
00:01:07,699 --> 00:01:10,566
And his wristwatch said even less.
6
00:01:12,303 --> 00:01:15,136
Every weekday, for 12 years…
7
00:01:15,340 --> 00:01:20,778
…Harold would brush
each of his 32 teeth 76 times.
8
00:01:22,380 --> 00:01:25,086
Thirty-eight times back and forth.
9
00:01:25,450 --> 00:01:27,958
Thirty-eight times up and down.
10
00:01:29,254 --> 00:01:31,848
Every weekday, for 12 years…
11
00:01:32,056 --> 00:01:36,287
…Harold would tie his tie in a single
Windsor knot instead of the double…
12
00:01:36,327 --> 00:01:39,353
…thereby saving up to 43 seconds.
13
00:01:39,564 --> 00:01:44,866
His wristwatch thought the single
Windsor made his neck look fat…
14
00:01:45,069 --> 00:01:46,719
…but said nothing.
15
00:01:50,141 --> 00:01:52,451
Every weekday, for 12 years…
16
00:01:52,577 --> 00:01:57,375
…Harold would run at a rate of nearly
57 steps per block for six blocks…
17
00:01:57,415 --> 00:02:00,748
…barely catching
the 8:17 Kronecker bus.
18
00:02:01,386 --> 00:02:03,181
His wristwatch would delight…
19
00:02:03,221 --> 00:02:07,379
…in the feeling of the crisp wind
rushing over its face.
20
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,896
And every weekday, for 12 years…
21
00:02:17,936 --> 00:02:21,303
…Harold would review 7·134
tax files…
22
00:02:21,506 --> 00:02:25,400
…as a senior agent for
the Internal Revenue Service.
23
00:02:25,910 --> 00:02:29,539
Regs section 1.469-2 (B) (i), Diane.
Thanks.
24
00:02:29,747 --> 00:02:32,113
Good morning. IRS.
25
00:02:33,117 --> 00:02:35,881
Harold, 89 times 1417?
26
00:02:36,621 --> 00:02:38,748
126·113.
27
00:02:38,957 --> 00:02:39,924
That adds up.
28
00:02:40,391 --> 00:02:44,623
Only taking a 45.7-minute
lunch break…
29
00:02:45,730 --> 00:02:49,029
…and a 4.3-minute coffee break…
30
00:02:49,233 --> 00:02:52,327
…timed precisely by his wristwatch.
31
00:02:52,804 --> 00:02:53,930
Oh, great.
32
00:02:54,138 --> 00:02:56,514
Yeah, we'll go to Mullen's or we'll…
33
00:02:57,075 --> 00:03:01,171
Beyond that, Harold
lived a life of solitude.
34
00:03:02,180 --> 00:03:04,444
He would walk home alone.
35
00:03:06,351 --> 00:03:08,785
He would eat alone.
36
00:03:16,260 --> 00:03:20,162
And at precisely 11:13 every night…
37
00:03:20,365 --> 00:03:23,129
…Harold would go to bed alone…
38
00:03:23,334 --> 00:03:28,135
…placing his wristwatch to rest
on the nightstand beside him.
39
00:03:29,273 --> 00:03:33,300
That was, of course,
before Wednesday.
40
00:03:34,946 --> 00:03:40,145
On Wednesday, Harold's wristwatch
changed everything.
41
00:03:46,691 --> 00:03:48,318
Oh, my God, you got it?
42
00:03:48,526 --> 00:03:49,652
I got it.
43
00:03:50,194 --> 00:03:51,559
I got it.
44
00:04:04,275 --> 00:04:06,904
If one had asked Harold,
he would have said…
45
00:04:06,944 --> 00:04:11,909
…that this particular Wednesday was
exactly like all the Wednesdays prior.
46
00:04:11,949 --> 00:04:14,523
And he began it the same way he…
47
00:04:24,862 --> 00:04:28,162
And he began it the same way
he always did.
48
00:04:31,335 --> 00:04:32,427
Hello?
49
00:04:42,113 --> 00:04:45,310
He began it the same way
he always did.
50
00:04:45,516 --> 00:04:47,311
When others' minds would…
51
00:04:47,351 --> 00:04:48,935
Hello? Is someone there?
52
00:04:56,027 --> 00:04:59,857
When others' minds would fantasize
about their upcoming day…
53
00:04:59,897 --> 00:05:04,162
…or even try to grip onto
the final moments of their dreams…
54
00:05:04,202 --> 00:05:08,036
…Harold just counted brushstrokes.
55
00:05:09,874 --> 00:05:13,171
All right, who just said,
“Harold just counted brushstrokes”?
56
00:05:13,211 --> 00:05:16,140
And how do you know I'm counting
brushstrokes?
57
00:05:16,180 --> 00:05:17,579
Hello?
58
00:05:20,184 --> 00:05:23,984
It was remarkable how the simple,
modest…
59
00:05:26,557 --> 00:05:28,616
It was remarkable h…
60
00:05:32,563 --> 00:05:37,228
It was remarkable how the simple,
modest elements of Harold's life…
61
00:05:37,268 --> 00:05:39,578
…so often taken for granted…
62
00:05:39,637 --> 00:05:45,041
…would become the catalyst
for an entirely new life.
63
00:05:46,144 --> 00:05:47,972
Harold ran for the bus…
64
00:05:48,012 --> 00:05:51,476
…his stiff leather shoes
making a terrible squeaking sound…
65
00:05:51,516 --> 00:05:54,354
…as they flexed against the asphalt.
66
00:05:59,657 --> 00:06:03,218
And though this was
an extraordinary day…
67
00:06:03,427 --> 00:06:07,453
…a day to be remembered
for the rest of Harold's life…
68
00:06:07,465 --> 00:06:10,567
…Harold just thought
it was a Wednesday.
69
00:06:11,102 --> 00:06:13,016
I'm sorry, did you hear that?
70
00:06:13,971 --> 00:06:17,568
The voice. Did you hear it?
“Harold thought it was a Wednesday”?
71
00:06:17,608 --> 00:06:19,522
Don't worry, it is Wednesday.
72
00:06:19,911 --> 00:06:24,267
No, no, did you hear it? “Harold
just thought it was a Wednesday”?
73
00:06:24,515 --> 00:06:27,143
–Who's Harold?
–I'm Harold.
74
00:06:27,752 --> 00:06:29,996
Harold, it's okay, it's Wednesday.
75
00:06:30,154 --> 00:06:31,621
No, no, I…
76
00:06:32,190 --> 00:06:33,782
Never mind.
77
00:06:35,359 --> 00:06:37,955
Harold couldn't concentrate
on his work.
78
00:06:37,995 --> 00:06:39,123
Excuse me, Harold?
79
00:06:39,163 --> 00:06:42,260
His thoughts were scattered.
His mind elsewhere.
80
00:06:42,300 --> 00:06:43,631
Sorry.
81
00:06:44,035 --> 00:06:46,831
Someone here should be able to fix…
Hold on a second.
82
00:06:46,871 --> 00:06:50,136
Hey, Harold. What's 67 times 453?
83
00:06:50,341 --> 00:06:54,141
When a coworker asked
the product of 67 and 453…
84
00:06:54,345 --> 00:06:56,707
You know what?
I can't think while you're talking.
85
00:06:56,747 --> 00:06:58,331
…he drew a blank.
86
00:06:58,449 --> 00:06:59,416
–What?
–What?
87
00:06:59,650 --> 00:07:03,915
–Harold quickly answered, “30·351.”
–What? Oh, nothing. 30·351.
88
00:07:03,955 --> 00:07:07,254
Despite the answer
really being 31·305.
89
00:07:07,458 --> 00:07:12,054
Wait, wait, wait, 31·305. Sorry.
90
00:07:14,799 --> 00:07:18,231
Dude, I just totally caught
some insurance adjuster…
91
00:07:18,302 --> 00:07:20,964
…claiming his jet ski
as a work vehicle.
92
00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:24,369
I'll tell you, it is a shame…
93
00:07:24,409 --> 00:07:28,039
…that they don't give out
an auditor of the year award.
94
00:07:29,648 --> 00:07:30,979
Dude?
95
00:07:31,917 --> 00:07:33,316
You okay?
96
00:07:34,453 --> 00:07:36,546
Dave, I'm being followed.
97
00:07:41,326 --> 00:07:44,022
How are you being followed?
You're not moving.
98
00:07:44,062 --> 00:07:46,860
–It's by a voice.
–What?
99
00:07:47,065 --> 00:07:49,863
I'm being followed
by a woman's voice.
100
00:07:52,871 --> 00:07:54,338
Okay.
101
00:07:56,208 --> 00:07:58,039
What is she saying?
102
00:07:58,744 --> 00:08:00,712
She's narrating.
103
00:08:05,417 --> 00:08:08,513
Harold, you're staring at boxes,
what is she narrating?
104
00:08:08,553 --> 00:08:10,851
No, no, no. I had to stop filing.
105
00:08:11,056 --> 00:08:12,970
Watch. Watch. Listen. Listen.
106
00:08:15,060 --> 00:08:17,522
The sound the paper made
against the folder…
107
00:08:17,562 --> 00:08:21,828
…had the same tone
as a wave scraping against sand.
108
00:08:23,101 --> 00:08:24,863
And when Harold thought about it…
109
00:08:24,903 --> 00:08:27,299
…he listened to enough waves
every day…
110
00:08:27,339 --> 00:08:32,208
…to constitute what he imagined
to be a deep and endless ocean.
111
00:08:33,545 --> 00:08:34,944
Did you hear that?
112
00:08:35,147 --> 00:08:36,546
You mean you filing?
113
00:08:36,748 --> 00:08:38,340
No, no, no, the voice.
114
00:08:39,451 --> 00:08:40,679
No.
115
00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:46,608
Frightening part is sometimes I do
imagine a deep and endless ocean.
116
00:08:47,559 --> 00:08:48,856
What ocean?
117
00:08:49,061 --> 00:08:52,053
The one made by the sound…
Forget it.
118
00:08:52,264 --> 00:08:54,232
New audits. Have a good day.
119
00:08:54,433 --> 00:08:55,730
Thank you.
120
00:08:58,070 --> 00:09:03,531
All right, we got a baker
and a securities trader.
121
00:09:07,646 --> 00:09:09,758
Maybe you should take the baker.
122
00:09:10,315 --> 00:09:11,577
–Okay?
–Okay.
123
00:09:19,891 --> 00:09:22,416
Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
124
00:09:22,627 --> 00:09:25,653
–You miscreant.
–I understand.
125
00:09:26,164 --> 00:09:30,294
Oh, get bent, taxman!
126
00:09:30,502 --> 00:09:32,561
–Taxman!
–Taxman!
127
00:09:33,772 --> 00:09:35,603
Taxman!
128
00:09:37,809 --> 00:09:39,276
Go home!
129
00:09:39,478 --> 00:09:43,240
Listen, is there somewhere else
we could talk about this?
130
00:09:43,515 --> 00:09:48,145
No. We're gonna talk about this
right here.
131
00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:53,981
Okay. It says, the file, that you only
paid part of your taxes for last year.
132
00:09:54,192 --> 00:09:57,252
–That's right.
–Looks like only 78 percent.
133
00:09:57,462 --> 00:09:59,123
Yep.
134
00:10:00,132 --> 00:10:01,660
So you did it on purpose?
135
00:10:01,700 --> 00:10:02,962
Yep.
136
00:10:03,168 --> 00:10:05,874
So you must have been
expecting an audit?
137
00:10:07,172 --> 00:10:10,767
I was expecting a fine…
138
00:10:11,676 --> 00:10:14,543
…or a sharp reprimand.
139
00:10:15,046 --> 00:10:18,009
A reprimand? This isn't
boarding school, Ms Pascal.
140
00:10:18,049 --> 00:10:20,029
You stole from the government.
141
00:10:20,452 --> 00:10:25,754
No, I didn't steal from the government.
I just didn't pay you entirely.
142
00:10:25,957 --> 00:10:28,927
Ms Pascal, you can't just
not pay your taxes.
143
00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:31,626
Yes, I can.
144
00:10:31,830 --> 00:10:33,859
You can if you wanna get audited.
145
00:10:33,899 --> 00:10:37,397
Only if I recognize your right
to audit me, Mr Crick.
146
00:10:37,936 --> 00:10:40,510
Ms Pascal, I'm right here
auditing you.
147
00:10:40,772 --> 00:10:42,934
Now I have to go over
your past three years…
148
00:10:42,974 --> 00:10:45,303
…to make sure
that's all you haven't paid.
149
00:10:45,343 --> 00:10:46,503
Fine.
150
00:10:47,879 --> 00:10:50,905
Actually, you know, it's not fine.
151
00:10:51,116 --> 00:10:55,018
Listen, I'm a big supporter
of fixing potholes…
152
00:10:55,220 --> 00:10:58,553
…and erecting swing sets
and building shelters.
153
00:10:58,757 --> 00:11:01,988
I am more than happy
to pay those taxes.
154
00:11:02,794 --> 00:11:06,628
I'm just not such a big fan
of the percentage…
155
00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:10,427
…that the government uses
for national defense…
156
00:11:10,635 --> 00:11:14,196
…corporate bailouts
and campaign discretionary funds.
157
00:11:14,406 --> 00:11:17,933
So I didn't pay those taxes.
158
00:11:18,143 --> 00:11:19,770
I think, actually…
159
00:11:19,978 --> 00:11:23,675
…I sent a letter to that effect
with my return.
160
00:11:24,149 --> 00:11:28,175
Would it be the letter that begins,
“Dear Imperialist Swine”?
161
00:11:28,253 --> 00:11:29,481
Yes.
162
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:35,188
Ms Pascal, what you're describing
is anarchy. Are you an anarchist?
163
00:11:36,161 --> 00:11:40,791
–You mean am I a member of…?
–An anarchist group, yes.
164
00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:44,130
Anarchists have a group?
165
00:11:44,336 --> 00:11:45,769
I believe so. Sure.
166
00:11:46,238 --> 00:11:47,466
They assemble?
167
00:11:49,174 --> 00:11:50,971
I don't know.
168
00:11:51,843 --> 00:11:55,711
Wouldn't that completely
defeat the purpose?
169
00:11:56,114 --> 00:12:00,378
It was difficult for Harold to imagine
Ms Pascal as a revolutionary.
170
00:12:00,418 --> 00:12:01,813
–Not now.
–Her thin arms…
171
00:12:01,853 --> 00:12:04,049
–What?
…hoisting protest signs.
172
00:12:04,089 --> 00:12:05,784
–Her long shapely legs…
–Nothing.
173
00:12:05,824 --> 00:12:08,452
…dashing from tear gas.
174
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,223
Harold wasn't prone to fantasies…
175
00:12:11,263 --> 00:12:14,959
…and so he tried his best
to remain professional.
176
00:12:15,567 --> 00:12:17,547
But, of course, failed.
177
00:12:17,903 --> 00:12:21,100
He couldn't help but imagine
Ms Pascal…
178
00:12:21,306 --> 00:12:26,058
…stroking the side of his face
with the soft blade of her finger.
179
00:12:26,678 --> 00:12:30,275
He couldn't help but imagine her
immersed in a tub…
180
00:12:30,315 --> 00:12:32,715
…shaving her legs.
181
00:12:32,918 --> 00:12:36,581
And he couldn't help
but imagine her naked…
182
00:12:36,788 --> 00:12:39,692
…stretched across his bed.
–Mr Crick?
183
00:12:41,860 --> 00:12:44,761
–Mr Crick.
–Yes, what is it?
184
00:12:44,963 --> 00:12:47,659
You're staring at my tits.
185
00:12:49,467 --> 00:12:53,098
I wa…? I don't think I was.
I don't think I would do that.
186
00:12:53,138 --> 00:12:54,920
If I was, I can assure you…
187
00:12:54,973 --> 00:12:58,870
…it was only as a representative
of the United States government.
188
00:12:58,910 --> 00:13:04,678
Sorry, I'm just having issues today.
So I'll be back on Tuesday.
189
00:13:07,419 --> 00:13:11,709
Harold suddenly found himself
beleaguered and exasperated…
190
00:13:11,890 --> 00:13:14,332
…outside the bakery…
–Shut up!
191
00:13:14,492 --> 00:13:16,621
…cursing the heavens in futility.
192
00:13:16,661 --> 00:13:19,057
No, I'm not, I'm cursing you,
you stupid voice!
193
00:13:19,097 --> 00:13:22,032
So shut up and leave me alone!
194
00:13:48,793 --> 00:13:50,988
Hey, watch it!
195
00:14:19,759 --> 00:14:21,317
Excuse me.
196
00:14:23,062 --> 00:14:24,996
Excuse me.
197
00:14:29,468 --> 00:14:30,833
Are you Miss Eiffel?
198
00:14:33,439 --> 00:14:34,561
–Yes.
–Excellent.
199
00:14:34,740 --> 00:14:36,588
May I ask what you're doing?
200
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,367
Research.
201
00:14:39,578 --> 00:14:41,492
–Oh, am I interrupting?
–Yes.
202
00:14:41,647 --> 00:14:44,548
I'm sorry. I'm Penny Escher.
203
00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:47,390
I'm the assistant
your publishers hired.
204
00:14:47,753 --> 00:14:50,916
–The spy.
–The assistant.
205
00:14:51,123 --> 00:14:53,961
I provide the same services
as a secretary.
206
00:14:54,026 --> 00:14:55,789
I don't need a secretary.
207
00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:59,725
Then I will have to find some
other way of occupying my time.
208
00:14:59,765 --> 00:15:01,560
Like watching me like a vulture…
209
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:05,231
…because the publishers
think I have writer's block, right?
210
00:15:05,271 --> 00:15:07,136
Do you have writer's block?
211
00:15:10,776 --> 00:15:12,243
Are these pages?
212
00:15:12,445 --> 00:15:14,913
They're letters. To me.
213
00:15:15,614 --> 00:15:18,980
–Are you writing back?
–I don't respond to letters.
214
00:15:19,151 --> 00:15:22,187
And I suppose you smoked
all these cigarettes?
215
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:24,518
No, they came pre-smoked.
216
00:15:24,990 --> 00:15:27,458
Yeah, they said you were funny.
217
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:34,566
What do you think about
leaping off a building?
218
00:15:35,234 --> 00:15:37,196
I don't think about
leaping off buildings.
219
00:15:37,236 --> 00:15:40,199
–Yes, you do.
–No. I try to think of nice things.
220
00:15:40,239 --> 00:15:42,334
Everyone thinks about
leaping off buildings.
221
00:15:42,374 --> 00:15:46,466
Well, I certainly don't think about
leaping off of a building.
222
00:15:53,219 --> 00:15:54,982
They say…
223
00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:03,592
I read this in this
fantastically depressing book.
224
00:16:04,330 --> 00:16:06,855
–That when you jump
from a building…
225
00:16:07,066 --> 00:16:10,399
…it's rarely the impact
that actually kills you.
226
00:16:10,870 --> 00:16:12,963
Well, I'm sure it doesn't help.
227
00:16:13,339 --> 00:16:17,332
There's a photograph
in the book called The Leaper.
228
00:16:17,543 --> 00:16:19,457
It's old, but it's beautiful.
229
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:23,976
From above the corpse of a woman
who'd just leapt to her death.
230
00:16:24,016 --> 00:16:28,009
There's blood around her head,
like a halo…
231
00:16:28,220 --> 00:16:32,510
…and her leg's buckled underneath,
her arm's snapped like a twig…
232
00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:35,249
…but her face is so serene…
233
00:16:35,795 --> 00:16:37,854
…so at peace.
234
00:16:38,364 --> 00:16:40,426
And I think it's because
when she died…
235
00:16:40,466 --> 00:16:43,867
…she could feel the wind
against her face.
236
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:53,440
I don't know how to kill Harold Crick.
That's why they sent you.
237
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:55,981
Yes, to help you.
238
00:16:57,216 --> 00:16:58,844
How are you gonna help me?
239
00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:01,180
You, who never thinks
of leaping off buildings?
240
00:17:01,220 --> 00:17:03,983
What great inspiration
will you bestow on me?
241
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,485
I'll tell you, the quaint ideas
you've gathered…
242
00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:08,721
…in your adorable career
as an “assistant”…
243
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:11,863
…are to no avail
when faced with killing a man.
244
00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:14,061
I understand.
245
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:17,096
Do you? I can't just…
246
00:17:24,009 --> 00:17:25,471
As much as I would like to…
247
00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:29,242
…I cannot simply throw
Harold Crick off a building.
248
00:17:35,921 --> 00:17:41,154
Miss Eiffel. Kay. I've been
an author's assistant for 11 years.
249
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:44,290
I've helped more than 20 authors
complete more than 35 books…
250
00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:46,559
…and I've never missed the deadline.
251
00:17:46,599 --> 00:17:49,762
And I have never gone back to the
publisher to ask for more time.
252
00:17:49,802 --> 00:17:53,399
Now, I will be available to you
every minute of every day…
253
00:17:53,439 --> 00:17:57,236
…until the final punctuation
is embedded on the very last page.
254
00:17:57,276 --> 00:18:01,645
I do not like loud music.
I do not abide narcotics.
255
00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:07,146
And I will gladly and quietly
help you kill Harold Crick.
256
00:18:16,061 --> 00:18:20,483
I had a very interesting little convo
with someone in your section.
257
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:21,827
Yeah?
258
00:18:23,202 --> 00:18:26,502
They said you were feeling
a little wibbly-wobbly.
259
00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,167
Catch a little cubicle fever?
260
00:18:31,710 --> 00:18:34,020
Oh, I don't know. I think I'm okay.
261
00:18:34,413 --> 00:18:39,646
Harold, a tree doesn't think
it's a tree…
262
00:18:39,985 --> 00:18:42,044
…it is a tree.
263
00:18:42,554 --> 00:18:45,352
Why was Harold talking to this man?
264
00:18:45,858 --> 00:18:48,326
This man was an idiot.
265
00:18:48,527 --> 00:18:54,022
This man used words like
“wibbly-wobbly” and “convo.”
266
00:18:54,500 --> 00:18:57,628
And explained that trees were trees.
267
00:18:58,170 --> 00:19:00,065
Of course trees were trees.
268
00:19:00,105 --> 00:19:02,001
Harold knew trees were trees.
269
00:19:02,041 --> 00:19:03,836
I am going to believe you, Harold.
270
00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:06,472
What Harold didn't know
was why he couldn't shake…
271
00:19:06,512 --> 00:19:09,241
…the smell of brownies
from his senses.
272
00:19:09,281 --> 00:19:13,835
Why Ms Pascal had made
his fingertips quiver and lips go numb.
273
00:19:15,254 --> 00:19:16,619
Harold?
274
00:19:19,024 --> 00:19:21,151
Yes? Sorry.
275
00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:23,921
What's going on, Harold?
276
00:19:25,431 --> 00:19:26,693
Well…
277
00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:32,229
Nothing. Everything's fine.
278
00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:37,475
Listen, according to your records…
279
00:19:37,676 --> 00:19:42,340
…you haven't taken vacation
in a few years now.
280
00:19:42,548 --> 00:19:45,676
Let's say you take a little break.
281
00:19:46,285 --> 00:19:48,651
Use some of that vaca time.
282
00:19:50,289 --> 00:19:53,622
Yeah. I'll think about it.
283
00:19:57,963 --> 00:19:59,328
Harold.
284
00:20:01,266 --> 00:20:06,067
I'm not really supposed to do this,
but…
285
00:20:25,358 --> 00:20:28,054
Harold assumed his watch
was simply on the fritz…
286
00:20:28,094 --> 00:20:33,374
…and never even considered that it
might be trying to tell him something.
287
00:20:34,834 --> 00:20:38,064
In fact, Harold had never once
paid attention to his watch…
288
00:20:38,104 --> 00:20:40,133
…other than to find out the time.
289
00:20:40,173 --> 00:20:44,439
And, honestly,
it drove his watch crazy.
290
00:20:44,844 --> 00:20:47,407
And so, on this particular
Wednesday evening…
291
00:20:47,447 --> 00:20:51,209
…as Harold waited for the bus,
his watch suddenly…
292
00:20:51,651 --> 00:20:53,516
…stopped.
293
00:20:55,255 --> 00:20:57,433
Sorry, does anyone have the time?
294
00:20:57,957 --> 00:21:01,188
–Yeah, I got 6:18.
–Thanks.
295
00:21:01,394 --> 00:21:07,492
Thus Harold's watch thrust him
into the immitigable path of fate.
296
00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:12,132
Little did he know that this simple,
seemingly innocuous act…
297
00:21:12,172 --> 00:21:15,010
…would result in his imminent death.
298
00:21:15,308 --> 00:21:17,435
What? What?
299
00:21:17,644 --> 00:21:19,635
Hey! Hello?
300
00:21:20,113 --> 00:21:21,512
What?
301
00:21:22,215 --> 00:21:23,477
Why?
302
00:21:24,217 --> 00:21:25,878
Why my death?
303
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:27,518
Hello!
304
00:21:28,154 --> 00:21:30,213
Excuse me!
305
00:21:30,690 --> 00:21:32,385
When?
306
00:21:33,093 --> 00:21:35,084
How imminent?
307
00:21:36,029 --> 00:21:37,621
Okay, where are you?
308
00:21:45,004 --> 00:21:49,168
“Harold would brush his 32 teeth
72 times.”
309
00:21:49,676 --> 00:21:53,237
Why won't you say anything?
I heard you.
310
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:56,652
“That would result
in his imminent death.”
311
00:21:56,683 --> 00:21:58,480
I heard you!
312
00:21:59,185 --> 00:22:00,901
Come on, you stupid voice.
313
00:22:01,020 --> 00:22:03,580
“Harold frantically grabbed his lamp.
314
00:22:04,557 --> 00:22:09,017
”Harold, incensed, shook the hell
out of it for no apparent reason!
315
00:22:09,229 --> 00:22:12,892
”And smashed it on the ground,
kicking it repeatedly!
316
00:22:14,634 --> 00:22:17,664
”Harold took his Kleenex box,
threw it across the room…
317
00:22:17,704 --> 00:22:19,420
…then stormed the closet!”
318
00:22:22,041 --> 00:22:24,100
Come on. Say something.
319
00:22:26,312 --> 00:22:28,872
Something. Say something!
320
00:22:30,116 --> 00:22:32,107
Say something!
321
00:22:39,058 --> 00:22:41,891
“Harold, distraught…”
322
00:22:43,796 --> 00:22:45,286
God.
323
00:22:45,765 --> 00:22:47,858
“Harold, distraught…”
324
00:22:50,937 --> 00:22:52,461
“Harold…”
325
00:22:56,609 --> 00:23:00,841
I'm afraid what you're describing
is schizophrenia.
326
00:23:03,249 --> 00:23:08,551
No. No. It's not schizophrenia.
It's just a voice in my head.
327
00:23:08,755 --> 00:23:12,418
I mean, the voice isn't telling me
to do anything.
328
00:23:12,625 --> 00:23:15,199
It's telling me what I've already done.
329
00:23:15,495 --> 00:23:18,328
Accurately
and with a better vocabulary.
330
00:23:19,199 --> 00:23:22,134
Mr Crick, you have a voice
speaking to you.
331
00:23:22,602 --> 00:23:25,730
No, not to me, about me.
332
00:23:26,206 --> 00:23:31,143
I'm somehow involved
in some sort of story.
333
00:23:31,544 --> 00:23:34,104
Like I'm a character in my own life.
334
00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:38,447
But the problem is
that the voice comes and goes.
335
00:23:38,751 --> 00:23:42,048
Like there are other parts of the story
not being told to me…
336
00:23:42,088 --> 00:23:46,085
…and I need to find out what those
other parts are before it's too late.
337
00:23:46,125 --> 00:23:48,963
Before the story concludes
with your death.
338
00:23:49,062 --> 00:23:50,427
Yes.
339
00:23:51,231 --> 00:23:53,860
Mr Crick, I hate to sound
like a broken record…
340
00:23:53,900 --> 00:23:56,198
…but that's schizophrenia.
341
00:23:57,604 --> 00:24:02,234
You don't sound like a broken record,
but it's just not schizophrenia.
342
00:24:03,309 --> 00:24:06,142
What if what I said was true?
343
00:24:06,346 --> 00:24:11,613
Hypothetically speaking,
if I was part of a story, a narrative…
344
00:24:11,818 --> 00:24:15,686
…even if it was only in my mind…
345
00:24:16,022 --> 00:24:18,266
…what would you suggest that I do?
346
00:24:18,558 --> 00:24:21,660
I would suggest
you take prescribed medication.
347
00:24:22,996 --> 00:24:24,623
Other than that.
348
00:24:24,831 --> 00:24:26,731
I don't know.
349
00:24:27,367 --> 00:24:31,921
I suppose I would send you to see
someone who knows about literature.
350
00:24:33,740 --> 00:24:34,934
Okay.
351
00:24:35,842 --> 00:24:38,902
Yeah. That's a good idea.
352
00:24:39,612 --> 00:24:41,341
Thank you.
353
00:24:41,981 --> 00:24:44,744
So you're the gentleman
who called me about the narrator.
354
00:24:44,784 --> 00:24:47,622
–Yes.
–This narrator says you're gonna die.
355
00:24:47,654 --> 00:24:48,780
Yes.
356
00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:52,446
–How long has it given you to live?
–I don't know.
357
00:24:52,725 --> 00:24:55,990
Dramatic irony.
It'll fuck you every time.
358
00:24:56,996 --> 00:24:58,987
–So you crazy or what?
–Well…
359
00:24:59,198 --> 00:25:01,394
Are you allowed to say that
to crazy people?
360
00:25:01,434 --> 00:25:03,730
–I don't know.
–Oh, well. How many stairs…
361
00:25:03,770 --> 00:25:06,068
…in the hallway out there?
–What?
362
00:25:06,272 --> 00:25:08,701
You were counting them
as we walked, weren't you?
363
00:25:08,741 --> 00:25:09,935
No.
364
00:25:10,143 --> 00:25:12,005
Of course.
What bank do you work at?
365
00:25:12,045 --> 00:25:14,206
No bank. IRS agent.
366
00:25:14,847 --> 00:25:15,939
–Married?
–No.
367
00:25:16,149 --> 00:25:17,173
Ever?
368
00:25:17,383 --> 00:25:20,480
Engaged to an auditor.
She left me for an actuary.
369
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:24,286
–How heartbreaking. Live alone?
–Yes.
370
00:25:25,591 --> 00:25:28,890
–Any pets?
–No.
371
00:25:29,262 --> 00:25:33,130
–Friends?
–No. Well, Dave at work.
372
00:25:34,367 --> 00:25:37,697
I see. The narrator,
exactly what does he sound like?
373
00:25:37,737 --> 00:25:39,068
It's a woman.
374
00:25:40,306 --> 00:25:41,603
A woman.
375
00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:43,935
–Is it a familiar woman?
–No.
376
00:25:44,143 --> 00:25:45,838
Someone you know?
377
00:25:46,713 --> 00:25:47,907
No.
378
00:25:48,114 --> 00:25:51,277
Did you have enough time
to count the tiles in the bathroom?
379
00:25:51,317 --> 00:25:53,285
I wasn't counting the tiles.
380
00:25:54,721 --> 00:25:56,484
–Coffee?
–No, thank you.
381
00:25:56,689 --> 00:25:58,156
–Sure?
–Yes.
382
00:25:59,325 --> 00:26:01,954
So this woman, the voice,
told you you're gonna die?
383
00:26:01,994 --> 00:26:04,390
She didn't tell me.
She doesn't know I can hear her.
384
00:26:04,430 --> 00:26:06,227
–But she said it.
–Yes.
385
00:26:06,432 --> 00:26:07,818
And you believed her.
386
00:26:08,501 --> 00:26:10,463
She's been right
about a few other things.
387
00:26:10,503 --> 00:26:14,064
–Such as?
–How I felt about work.
388
00:26:14,273 --> 00:26:16,741
–You dislike your work?
–Yes.
389
00:26:18,344 --> 00:26:21,174
Well, not the most insightful voice
in the world, is it?
390
00:26:21,214 --> 00:26:23,643
First thing on a list
of what Americans hate: work.
391
00:26:23,683 --> 00:26:26,512
Second, traffic. Third, missing socks.
See what I'm saying?
392
00:26:26,552 --> 00:26:27,519
Sort of.
393
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:29,882
I told you you were gonna die,
you believe me?
394
00:26:29,922 --> 00:26:31,253
–No.
–Why?
395
00:26:31,457 --> 00:26:32,822
I don't know you.
396
00:26:33,025 --> 00:26:35,731
–But you don't know this narrator.
–Well…
397
00:26:36,362 --> 00:26:40,924
–Okay, Mr Crick, I can't help you.
–Why?
398
00:26:41,134 --> 00:26:44,364
Well, I'm not an expert in crazy,
I'm an expert in literature theory.
399
00:26:44,404 --> 00:26:46,838
And I gotta tell you, thus far…
400
00:26:47,039 --> 00:26:50,103
…there doesn't seem to be a single
literary thing about you.
401
00:26:50,143 --> 00:26:53,606
I don't doubt you hear a voice,
but it couldn't possibly be a narrator…
402
00:26:53,646 --> 00:26:56,844
…because, frankly, there doesn't seem
to be much to narrate.
403
00:26:56,884 --> 00:26:59,480
Beside that, this semester
I'm teaching five courses.
404
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:01,382
I'm mentoring
two doctoral candidates…
405
00:27:01,422 --> 00:27:04,260
…and I'm the faculty lifeguard
at the pool.
406
00:27:05,726 --> 00:27:09,423
–I just thought you could possibly…
–Perhaps you should keep a journal.
407
00:27:09,463 --> 00:27:11,592
Write down what she said
or something.
408
00:27:11,632 --> 00:27:14,362
That's all I can suggest.
409
00:27:16,370 --> 00:27:19,133
I can barely remember it all.
I just remember:
410
00:27:19,173 --> 00:27:23,667
“Little did he know that this simple,
seemingly innocuous act…
411
00:27:23,877 --> 00:27:26,345
…would lead to his imminent death.”
412
00:27:26,547 --> 00:27:29,414
–What?
–“Little did he know that this…”
413
00:27:29,616 --> 00:27:32,380
–Did you say, “little did he know”?
–Yes.
414
00:27:33,854 --> 00:27:36,758
I've written papers
on “little did he know.”
415
00:27:37,291 --> 00:27:40,855
I used to teach a class
based on “little did he know.”
416
00:27:41,795 --> 00:27:45,626
I mean, I once gave an entire seminar
on “little did he know.”
417
00:27:45,666 --> 00:27:47,497
Son of a bitch, Harold.
418
00:27:48,535 --> 00:27:51,532
“Little did he know” means there's
something he doesn't know…
419
00:27:51,572 --> 00:27:55,796
…that means there's something
you don't know. Did you know that?
420
00:27:56,310 --> 00:27:58,884
–I want you to come back Friday.
–Okay.
421
00:27:58,946 --> 00:28:01,341
No, “imminent,”
you could be dead by Friday.
422
00:28:01,381 --> 00:28:05,408
Come back tomorrow at 9:45.
423
00:28:05,619 --> 00:28:08,655
Ten seconds ago
you said you wouldn't help me.
424
00:28:09,723 --> 00:28:12,759
It's been a very revealing 10 seconds,
Harold.
425
00:28:16,430 --> 00:28:18,796
Harold was deep in thought.
426
00:28:18,999 --> 00:28:23,619
For a few, brief moments, from
Born Boulevard to Euclid Avenue…
427
00:28:23,670 --> 00:28:26,300
…all the calculations
and all the rules…
428
00:28:26,340 --> 00:28:30,640
…and all the precision of Harold's life
just faded away.
429
00:28:31,879 --> 00:28:35,645
How perfect then
that in this space…
430
00:28:35,849 --> 00:28:38,750
…Ana Pascal would appear.
431
00:28:40,053 --> 00:28:41,213
Ms Pascal.
432
00:28:43,524 --> 00:28:45,886
Ms Pascal, it's Harold Crick
from the IRS.
433
00:28:45,926 --> 00:28:47,393
Excuse me.
434
00:28:50,631 --> 00:28:53,361
–Hi.
–Hi.
435
00:28:53,567 --> 00:28:56,331
–Would you like a seat?
–Nope.
436
00:28:56,537 --> 00:28:58,562
There's 11 open ones.
437
00:28:58,772 --> 00:29:00,501
I don't care.
438
00:29:04,378 --> 00:29:05,500
Sorry about that.
439
00:29:17,257 --> 00:29:18,690
How are you?
440
00:29:19,293 --> 00:29:21,523
I'm lousy. I'm being audited.
441
00:29:22,930 --> 00:29:24,124
Of course.
442
00:29:24,565 --> 00:29:26,362
By a real creep too.
443
00:29:32,539 --> 00:29:35,133
I think I owe you an apology.
444
00:29:36,109 --> 00:29:38,600
–Really?
–IRS agents…
445
00:29:38,812 --> 00:29:42,508
…we're given rigorous aptitude tests
before we can work.
446
00:29:42,950 --> 00:29:47,284
Unfortunately for you, we aren't tested
on tact or good manners…
447
00:29:47,621 --> 00:29:49,714
…so I apologize.
448
00:29:50,624 --> 00:29:53,718
I ogled you.
449
00:29:55,529 --> 00:29:56,894
Sorry.
450
00:30:01,168 --> 00:30:03,762
Okay, apology accepted.
451
00:30:04,805 --> 00:30:07,535
But only because you stammered.
452
00:30:14,314 --> 00:30:18,604
So you're a frequenter of the
metropolitan transit authority too?
453
00:30:18,652 --> 00:30:20,984
No. I'm just late.
454
00:30:21,989 --> 00:30:24,219
Big flag-burning to get to?
455
00:30:25,392 --> 00:30:26,916
Actually…
456
00:30:28,061 --> 00:30:32,521
…it's my weekly evil-conspiracy
and needlepoint group.
457
00:30:33,867 --> 00:30:35,494
You wanna come?
458
00:30:36,770 --> 00:30:40,598
I left my thimbles and socialist
reading material at home.
459
00:30:42,009 --> 00:30:43,408
So…
460
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:50,008
Harold nervously made small talk.
461
00:30:51,118 --> 00:30:53,484
You have very straight teeth.
462
00:30:53,687 --> 00:30:55,348
Very small talk.
463
00:30:56,623 --> 00:30:59,592
Thanks. They're real.
464
00:30:59,793 --> 00:31:03,290
Harold quickly calculated the odds
of making an ass of himself…
465
00:31:03,330 --> 00:31:07,164
…in ratio to the amount of time
he stayed to chat.
466
00:31:08,635 --> 00:31:10,762
This is my stop. I should go.
467
00:31:12,906 --> 00:31:15,469
–He was elated and surprised…
–See you soon.
468
00:31:15,509 --> 00:31:19,535
…by his somewhat flirtatious
encounter with Ms Pascal.
469
00:31:20,013 --> 00:31:23,143
So elated that he exited
the Transit Authority bus…
470
00:31:23,183 --> 00:31:27,586
…a good 27 blocks too early
and would now have to walk.
471
00:31:46,506 --> 00:31:49,102
–“You ain't down yet.”
–That's right.
472
00:31:49,142 --> 00:31:53,840
Tell us, what is You Ain't Got
Nothin' On Me about, Emmett Cole?
473
00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:55,609
What does this mean?
474
00:31:55,649 --> 00:32:00,533
Well, it's about being around
in the world, doing different things…
475
00:32:00,687 --> 00:32:03,459
…doing what you wanna do…
–Come in.
476
00:32:06,126 --> 00:32:10,119
Mr Crick. Come in, come in. Please.
477
00:32:12,299 --> 00:32:13,323
How are you?
478
00:32:14,034 --> 00:32:15,288
I'm fine, actually.
479
00:32:15,469 --> 00:32:17,300
You can turn that off.
480
00:32:17,838 --> 00:32:20,500
Looks like our narrator
hasn't killed you quite yet.
481
00:32:20,540 --> 00:32:23,805
–No, not yet.
–Good, great. Have a seat.
482
00:32:24,544 --> 00:32:26,590
–Count the stairs outside?
–No.
483
00:32:26,747 --> 00:32:29,716
Course not. I've devised a test…
484
00:32:29,916 --> 00:32:32,490
How exciting is that?
–Of 23 questions…
485
00:32:32,586 --> 00:32:36,316
…which I think might help uncover
more truths about this narrator.
486
00:32:36,356 --> 00:32:38,187
–Now, Howard…
–Harold.
487
00:32:38,391 --> 00:32:42,285
Harold. These may seem silly,
but your candor is paramount.
488
00:32:42,429 --> 00:32:43,919
Okay.
489
00:32:44,397 --> 00:32:45,796
So.
490
00:32:48,001 --> 00:32:51,961
We know it's a woman's voice,
the story involves your death…
491
00:32:53,573 --> 00:32:55,302
…it's modern, it's in English.
492
00:32:55,342 --> 00:32:58,305
I'm assuming the author
has a cursory knowledge of the city.
493
00:32:58,345 --> 00:33:01,280
–Sure.
–Okay, good.
494
00:33:03,984 --> 00:33:05,713
Question one:
495
00:33:05,919 --> 00:33:08,582
“Has anyone recently left
any gifts outside your home?”
496
00:33:08,622 --> 00:33:10,180
Anything? Gum? Money?
497
00:33:10,390 --> 00:33:12,634
–A large wooden horse?
–I'm sorry?
498
00:33:12,726 --> 00:33:14,772
–Just answer the question.
–No.
499
00:33:14,928 --> 00:33:17,724
“Do you find yourself inclined
to solve murder mysteries…
500
00:33:17,764 --> 00:33:21,262
…in large, luxurious homes
to which…?” Let me finish.
501
00:33:21,368 --> 00:33:24,031
“To which you may or may not
have been invited?”
502
00:33:24,071 --> 00:33:25,265
No. No, no, no.
503
00:33:25,473 --> 00:33:28,499
All right. On a scale of one to 10…
504
00:33:28,709 --> 00:33:32,774
…what would you consider the
likelihood you might be assassinated?
505
00:33:32,814 --> 00:33:33,781
Assassinated?
506
00:33:33,981 --> 00:33:38,079
One being very unlikely, 10 being
expecting it around every corner.
507
00:33:38,119 --> 00:33:40,849
–I have no idea…
–Okay. Let me rephrase.
508
00:33:41,689 --> 00:33:43,680
Are you the king of anything?
509
00:33:44,759 --> 00:33:45,953
–Like what?
–Anything.
510
00:33:45,993 --> 00:33:48,456
King of the lanes
at the local bowling alley.
511
00:33:48,496 --> 00:33:49,895
“King of the lanes”?
512
00:33:50,097 --> 00:33:54,128
–King of the lanes. King of the trolls.
–“King of the trolls”?
513
00:33:54,168 --> 00:33:58,468
Yes. A clandestine land
found underneath your floorboards.
514
00:33:58,673 --> 00:33:59,970
–Anything.
–No.
515
00:34:00,174 --> 00:34:02,233
No. That's ridiculous.
516
00:34:02,443 --> 00:34:06,140
Agreed. But let's start with ridiculous
and move backwards.
517
00:34:06,180 --> 00:34:09,277
Now, was any part of you at one time
part of something else?
518
00:34:09,317 --> 00:34:11,627
Like do I have someone else's arms?
519
00:34:11,686 --> 00:34:14,882
Well, is it possible at one time
that you were made of stone…
520
00:34:14,922 --> 00:34:16,984
…wood, lye, varied corpse parts…
521
00:34:17,024 --> 00:34:19,554
…or earth made holy
by rabbinical elders?
522
00:34:19,594 --> 00:34:23,457
No. Look… I'm sorry. What do these
questions have to do with anything?
523
00:34:23,497 --> 00:34:25,793
The only way to find out
what story you're in…
524
00:34:25,833 --> 00:34:27,995
…is to determine what stories
you're not in.
525
00:34:28,035 --> 00:34:31,465
Odd as it may seem, I've just ruled out
half of Greek literature…
526
00:34:31,505 --> 00:34:33,768
…seven fairy tales,
10 Chinese fables…
527
00:34:33,808 --> 00:34:36,904
…and determined conclusively
that you are not King Hamlet…
528
00:34:36,944 --> 00:34:38,935
…Scout Finch, Miss Marple…
529
00:34:39,146 --> 00:34:42,809
…Frankenstein's monster,
or a golem.
530
00:34:47,955 --> 00:34:50,985
Aren't you relieved to know
you're not a golem?
531
00:34:51,025 --> 00:34:54,358
Yes, I am relieved to know
that I am not a golem.
532
00:34:54,562 --> 00:34:55,529
Good.
533
00:35:00,468 --> 00:35:02,250
Do you have magical powers?
534
00:35:37,805 --> 00:35:40,181
May I ask what we're doing out here?
535
00:35:40,207 --> 00:35:43,734
–We're imagining car wrecks.
–I see.
536
00:35:45,079 --> 00:35:47,508
And we can't imagine
car wrecks inside?
537
00:35:47,548 --> 00:35:49,072
No.
538
00:35:49,917 --> 00:35:52,313
Did you know
that 41 percent of accidents…
539
00:35:52,353 --> 00:35:54,844
…occur in times
of inclement weather?
540
00:35:55,056 --> 00:35:57,432
So do 90 percent
of pneumonia cases.
541
00:35:57,525 --> 00:36:02,428
Really? Pneumonia.
That's an interesting way to die.
542
00:36:03,364 --> 00:36:05,992
But how would Harold
catch pneumonia?
543
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:08,362
Have you written
anything new today?
544
00:36:08,402 --> 00:36:09,664
No.
545
00:36:09,870 --> 00:36:12,833
Did you read the poems I suggested,
or make a list of words…
546
00:36:12,873 --> 00:36:14,985
…buy new typing paper, anything?
547
00:36:15,042 --> 00:36:16,600
No, none of it.
548
00:36:17,979 --> 00:36:19,907
Sitting in the rain won't write books.
549
00:36:19,947 --> 00:36:24,501
Well, that illustrates exactly how much
you know about writing books.
550
00:36:31,359 --> 00:36:32,519
What's this?
551
00:36:33,127 --> 00:36:35,635
It's literature on the nicotine patch.
552
00:36:36,831 --> 00:36:40,593
I don't need a nicotine patch, Penny.
I smoke cigarettes.
553
00:36:41,068 --> 00:36:42,330
Well, it may help.
554
00:36:42,536 --> 00:36:45,664
May help? Help what?
555
00:36:46,140 --> 00:36:49,041
Help what, Penny?
Help write a novel?
556
00:36:49,243 --> 00:36:51,473
May help save your life.
557
00:36:51,812 --> 00:36:54,452
I'm not in the business of saving lives.
558
00:36:57,018 --> 00:36:59,043
In fact, just the opposite.
559
00:37:02,123 --> 00:37:04,385
–“What's your favorite word?”
–Integer.
560
00:37:04,425 --> 00:37:05,949
Good, good, good.
561
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:08,287
“Do you aspire to anything?”
562
00:37:09,630 --> 00:37:12,190
–No.
–Conquer Russia?
563
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:14,960
–Win a whistling contest?
–No.
564
00:37:15,169 --> 00:37:19,037
Harold, you must
have some ambition.
565
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:23,435
–I don't think so.
–Some underlying dream. Think.
566
00:37:25,713 --> 00:37:27,203
Well…
567
00:37:28,349 --> 00:37:31,451
…I've always wanted my life
to be more musical.
568
00:37:31,752 --> 00:37:35,153
–Like West Side Story?
–No.
569
00:37:35,589 --> 00:37:37,454
–Like…
–What?
570
00:37:37,658 --> 00:37:41,156
Well, I've always wanted to learn
to play the guitar.
571
00:37:43,564 --> 00:37:45,191
Okay.
572
00:37:47,034 --> 00:37:49,163
The last thing
to determine conclusively…
573
00:37:49,203 --> 00:37:51,866
…is whether you're in a comedy
or a tragedy.
574
00:37:51,906 --> 00:37:53,424
To quote Italo Calvino:
575
00:37:53,441 --> 00:37:56,871
“The ultimate meaning to which
all stories refer has two faces:
576
00:37:56,911 --> 00:38:00,343
The continuity of life,
the inevitability of death.”
577
00:38:00,748 --> 00:38:04,115
Tragedy, you die.
Comedy, you get hitched.
578
00:38:07,922 --> 00:38:10,051
Most comic heroes
fall in love with people…
579
00:38:10,091 --> 00:38:12,053
…introduced after the story
has begun.
580
00:38:12,093 --> 00:38:14,889
Usually people
who hate the hero initially.
581
00:38:14,929 --> 00:38:18,729
Although I can't imagine anyone
hating you, Harold.
582
00:38:18,933 --> 00:38:22,733
Professor Hilbert, I'm an IRS agent.
583
00:38:23,104 --> 00:38:24,298
Everyone hates me.
584
00:38:25,739 --> 00:38:26,993
Right, right. Good.
585
00:38:27,141 --> 00:38:31,472
Have you met anyone recently
who might loathe the very core of you?
586
00:38:31,512 --> 00:38:35,208
I just started auditing a woman
who told me to get bent.
587
00:38:35,850 --> 00:38:37,962
Well, that sounds like a comedy.
588
00:38:39,220 --> 00:38:41,051
Try to develop that.
589
00:38:42,857 --> 00:38:43,881
Four of these?
590
00:38:44,091 --> 00:38:46,187
You know, I didn't get my honey,
honey.
591
00:38:46,227 --> 00:38:49,923
Lulu, can you refill the honey
for Larry? Quarters also?
592
00:38:49,964 --> 00:38:51,556
That's my good boy.
593
00:38:51,765 --> 00:38:53,699
I'm adding some acorns.
594
00:38:54,168 --> 00:38:55,567
Mr Crick.
595
00:38:56,704 --> 00:39:00,334
You're here early.
Must have a lot of people to extort.
596
00:39:00,341 --> 00:39:02,206
No. No, just you.
597
00:39:03,577 --> 00:39:06,375
–Twig tea and banana bread.
–Yes, ma'am.
598
00:39:06,580 --> 00:39:10,211
Actually, it should only take the day to
make sure 22 percent is all you owe.
599
00:39:10,251 --> 00:39:14,145
Well, I won't be paying no matter
the percentage, Mr Crick.
600
00:39:14,188 --> 00:39:18,148
No, I know. But the percent
determines how big your cell is.
601
00:39:24,732 --> 00:39:26,527
You know, you can call me Harold.
602
00:39:26,567 --> 00:39:29,730
Yeah, I know. But I don't want to.
603
00:39:31,939 --> 00:39:33,300
This is for Ramona, honey.
604
00:39:33,340 --> 00:39:36,036
–Oh, thank you.
–You're very welcome.
605
00:39:36,677 --> 00:39:38,987
What is that?
What are you marking?
606
00:39:40,514 --> 00:39:42,038
Oh, this is nothing.
607
00:39:42,249 --> 00:39:45,377
Why don't we start
with your backup documents…
608
00:39:45,586 --> 00:39:48,215
…and the receipts
for the past three years.
609
00:39:48,255 --> 00:39:49,745
Sure.
610
00:39:58,433 --> 00:39:59,627
What's this?
611
00:40:01,036 --> 00:40:03,129
–My files.
–What?
612
00:40:03,338 --> 00:40:04,828
My tax files.
613
00:40:05,740 --> 00:40:07,402
You keep your files like this?
614
00:40:07,442 --> 00:40:10,240
No, actually I'm quite fastidious.
615
00:40:10,445 --> 00:40:13,972
I put them in this box
just to screw with you.
616
00:40:27,529 --> 00:40:30,862
–Hi.
–Hi. How are you?
617
00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:34,662
So how was it? Aruba.
618
00:40:34,869 --> 00:40:38,333
Ms Pascal? Can I just ask you
a question about this receipt?
619
00:40:38,373 --> 00:40:41,403
–It was fantastic.
–Just wondering if this nine is a seven.
620
00:40:41,443 --> 00:40:44,674
–And what did you do?
–I got a beautiful tan.
621
00:40:45,313 --> 00:40:49,537
–I'm just gonna guess it's a seven.
–I mean, I feel stress-free.
622
00:40:54,122 --> 00:40:55,904
Do you need help with that?
623
00:40:57,025 --> 00:40:59,221
–Walk to heaven. I see the president.
624
00:40:59,261 --> 00:41:01,590
–It's the taxman. Hello, Mr Taxman.
–Yeah.
625
00:41:01,630 --> 00:41:03,258
–You can call me Harold.
–Okay.
626
00:41:03,298 --> 00:41:05,093
–How the numbers going?
–Pretty good.
627
00:41:05,133 --> 00:41:07,062
–Gonna find that 22 percent?
–22 percent?
628
00:41:07,102 --> 00:41:09,764
Twenty-two, 11 times 2.
It's prime numbers.
629
00:41:09,804 --> 00:41:12,968
–You gonna tax the bathroom?
–No, I'm not gonna tax the bathroom.
630
00:41:13,008 --> 00:41:15,437
–Could I use the bathroom, then?
–Go for it.
631
00:41:15,477 --> 00:41:17,339
Okay. I wanna use the bathroom.
Bye now.
632
00:41:17,379 --> 00:41:18,505
Bye-bye.
633
00:42:00,455 --> 00:42:01,820
Well, good night.
634
00:42:02,957 --> 00:42:04,618
You want a cookie?
635
00:42:05,260 --> 00:42:06,386
Oh, no.
636
00:42:06,594 --> 00:42:10,752
Come on. They're warm and gooey.
They're fresh out of the oven.
637
00:42:11,433 --> 00:42:13,230
No, I don't like cookies.
638
00:42:15,270 --> 00:42:16,897
You don't like cookies?
639
00:42:20,008 --> 00:42:23,102
–What's wrong with you?
–I don't know.
640
00:42:23,311 --> 00:42:26,246
–Everybody likes cookies.
–No, I know.
641
00:42:26,448 --> 00:42:30,350
I mean, after a really awful,
no-good day…
642
00:42:30,552 --> 00:42:33,786
…didn't your mama ever make you
milk and cookies?
643
00:42:34,622 --> 00:42:38,114
No. My mother didn't bake.
644
00:42:38,326 --> 00:42:41,454
The only cookies I ever had
were store-bought.
645
00:42:43,998 --> 00:42:46,831
Okay. Sit down.
646
00:42:47,469 --> 00:42:49,596
–No, I'm…
–No.
647
00:42:50,071 --> 00:42:51,868
Sit down.
648
00:42:55,744 --> 00:42:56,938
Now…
649
00:42:57,946 --> 00:42:59,971
…eat a cookie.
650
00:43:00,181 --> 00:43:01,546
I really can't.
651
00:43:01,750 --> 00:43:05,083
Mr Crick, it was a really awful day.
652
00:43:05,987 --> 00:43:08,820
I know, I made sure of it.
653
00:43:09,324 --> 00:43:11,019
So pick up the cookie…
654
00:43:11,226 --> 00:43:13,353
…dip it in the milk…
655
00:43:13,561 --> 00:43:15,358
…and eat it.
656
00:43:39,921 --> 00:43:42,297
That's a really, really good cookie.
657
00:43:50,565 --> 00:43:53,271
So when did you decide
to become a baker?
658
00:43:53,635 --> 00:43:56,536
–In college.
–Oh, like a cooking college?
659
00:43:57,672 --> 00:44:00,800
I went to Harvard Law actually.
660
00:44:01,376 --> 00:44:06,507
–Oh, I'm sorry, I just assumed it was…
–No. No, it's fine. I didn't finish.
661
00:44:07,282 --> 00:44:09,250
–Did something happen?
–No.
662
00:44:10,652 --> 00:44:14,645
I was barely accepted.
I mean, really barely.
663
00:44:14,856 --> 00:44:18,153
The only reason they let me come
was because of my essay.
664
00:44:18,193 --> 00:44:22,219
How I was gonna make the world
a better place with my degree.
665
00:44:22,964 --> 00:44:27,697
Anyway, we would have to participate
in these study sessions…
666
00:44:27,902 --> 00:44:31,004
…my classmates and I,
sometimes all night long.
667
00:44:31,105 --> 00:44:34,933
And so I'd bake so no one
would go hungry while we worked.
668
00:44:35,043 --> 00:44:38,173
Sometimes I would bake all afternoon
in the kitchen in the dorm…
669
00:44:38,213 --> 00:44:42,240
…and then I'd bring my little treats
to the study groups…
670
00:44:42,450 --> 00:44:44,077
…and people loved them.
671
00:44:44,285 --> 00:44:45,547
Eat.
672
00:44:45,753 --> 00:44:50,019
I made oatmeal cookies,
peanut-butter bars…
673
00:44:50,492 --> 00:44:53,928
…dark-chocolate
macadamia-nut wedges.
674
00:44:54,128 --> 00:44:56,636
And everyone would eat
and stay happy…
675
00:44:56,664 --> 00:44:58,993
…and study harder
and do better on the tests.
676
00:44:59,033 --> 00:45:01,896
More and more people started
coming to the study groups…
677
00:45:01,936 --> 00:45:03,767
…and I'd bring more snacks.
678
00:45:03,972 --> 00:45:06,668
I was always looking
for better and better recipes…
679
00:45:06,708 --> 00:45:12,237
…until soon it was ricotta cheese
and apricot croissants…
680
00:45:13,114 --> 00:45:15,639
…and mocha bars
with an almond glaze…
681
00:45:15,850 --> 00:45:20,480
…and lemon chiffon cake
with zesty peach icing.
682
00:45:21,589 --> 00:45:25,616
And at the end of the semester
I had 27 study partners…
683
00:45:25,827 --> 00:45:29,263
…eight Mead journals
filled with recipes…
684
00:45:29,464 --> 00:45:30,988
…and a D average.
685
00:45:31,933 --> 00:45:33,730
So I dropped out.
686
00:45:34,335 --> 00:45:37,031
I figured if I was gonna
make the world a better place…
687
00:45:37,071 --> 00:45:39,232
…I would do it with cookies.
688
00:45:44,078 --> 00:45:45,511
You like them?
689
00:45:47,015 --> 00:45:48,004
I do.
690
00:45:49,083 --> 00:45:50,880
I'm glad.
691
00:45:51,953 --> 00:45:54,395
Thank you for forcing me
to eat them.
692
00:45:54,789 --> 00:45:56,552
You're welcome.
693
00:46:01,829 --> 00:46:04,759
I should go. Oh, thank you.
For the cookies, I mean.
694
00:46:04,799 --> 00:46:06,728
–Why don't you take them home?
–Oh, no.
695
00:46:06,768 --> 00:46:09,012
–Oh, come on.
–No, really, please.
696
00:46:09,137 --> 00:46:12,371
–No, really, please.
–No, no, no. Really, please.
697
00:46:12,373 --> 00:46:14,432
I would like to, but I can't.
698
00:46:15,109 --> 00:46:16,804
–You can't?
–No, no, I mean…
699
00:46:16,844 --> 00:46:19,540
Because, see, it constitutes a gift.
700
00:46:19,881 --> 00:46:22,610
Actually I shouldn't have even had
those other ones, so…
701
00:46:22,650 --> 00:46:25,014
Okay. Well, I'm not
gonna tell anyone.
702
00:46:25,054 --> 00:46:27,850
–No. I know, but if you did…
–Well, I'm not going to.
703
00:46:27,890 --> 00:46:29,151
I know, but if you did…
704
00:46:29,191 --> 00:46:32,421
–What, you think I'm gonna call the…?
–No, no. I'll purchase them.
705
00:46:32,461 --> 00:46:35,589
I'm happy to purchase them.
How's that?
706
00:46:37,633 --> 00:46:40,033
And then there are no issues.
707
00:46:42,137 --> 00:46:44,367
–What?
–No.
708
00:46:44,573 --> 00:46:46,632
–Please.
–Just…
709
00:46:46,842 --> 00:46:48,756
–Why don't I just…?
–Go home.
710
00:46:48,877 --> 00:46:50,339
Really, it's not a big deal.
711
00:46:50,379 --> 00:46:52,506
Go home.
712
00:46:54,183 --> 00:46:55,548
Okay.
713
00:47:00,155 --> 00:47:01,452
Did you?
714
00:47:03,058 --> 00:47:06,050
You baked those cookies for me,
didn't you?
715
00:47:09,698 --> 00:47:13,262
You were just trying to be nice
and I totally blew it.
716
00:47:17,006 --> 00:47:20,237
This may sound like gibberish
to you…
717
00:47:22,745 --> 00:47:25,236
…but I think I'm in a tragedy.
718
00:47:55,844 --> 00:47:59,842
Professor Hilbert, I've totally failed
at the comedy-tragedy thing.
719
00:47:59,882 --> 00:48:02,211
In fact, I think she likes me even less.
720
00:48:02,251 --> 00:48:04,825
–I know, it's great.
–What do you mean?
721
00:48:05,287 --> 00:48:07,716
You've proved something else
entirely.
722
00:48:07,756 --> 00:48:11,419
The voice seems to be dependent
on actions you take.
723
00:48:12,528 --> 00:48:15,157
You reset your watch,
it says you reset your watch.
724
00:48:15,197 --> 00:48:17,159
You ride a bus,
it says you ride the bus.
725
00:48:17,199 --> 00:48:19,728
You brush your teeth,
it says you brush your teeth.
726
00:48:19,768 --> 00:48:23,795
It may be that you yourself
are perpetuating the story.
727
00:48:24,006 --> 00:48:27,669
–So I suggest we try something else.
–Like what?
728
00:48:27,876 --> 00:48:31,107
–Try nothing. Nothing.
–What about Ms Pascal?
729
00:48:31,313 --> 00:48:32,675
–Forget her.
–Forget her?
730
00:48:32,715 --> 00:48:34,843
Other than numbers,
she's all I think about.
731
00:48:34,883 --> 00:48:37,780
Harold, if you wanna stay alive,
you'll try something else.
732
00:48:37,820 --> 00:48:41,153
–That something being nothing?
–Nothing, exactly.
733
00:48:41,356 --> 00:48:44,052
–Nothing?
–Let me explain this again.
734
00:48:44,259 --> 00:48:48,057
Some plots are moved forward
by external events and crises.
735
00:48:48,097 --> 00:48:50,959
Others are moved forward
by the characters themselves.
736
00:48:50,999 --> 00:48:53,362
If I go through that door,
the plot continues.
737
00:48:53,402 --> 00:48:55,831
The story of me through the door.
If I stay here…
738
00:48:55,871 --> 00:48:58,467
…the plot can't move forward,
the story ends.
739
00:48:58,507 --> 00:49:01,305
Also if I stay here, I'm late.
740
00:49:03,645 --> 00:49:06,153
–Don't do anything tomorrow.
–Nothing?
741
00:49:06,248 --> 00:49:10,708
Stay home. Don't answer the phone,
open the door, brush your teeth.
742
00:49:10,919 --> 00:49:12,481
–What about work?
–Call them.
743
00:49:12,521 --> 00:49:14,917
–Tell them you're not coming.
–Don't go to work?
744
00:49:14,957 --> 00:49:17,252
Don't do anything that may
move the plot forward.
745
00:49:17,292 --> 00:49:19,922
Instead, let's see if the plot finds you.
746
00:49:19,962 --> 00:49:22,556
Marshall, you're not kicking.
747
00:49:25,934 --> 00:49:29,598
Certain that these geese have never
known any home but this one:
748
00:49:29,638 --> 00:49:32,146
a small lake in Eastern Poland.
749
00:49:32,341 --> 00:49:35,604
Pollution from a nearby factory
is slowly killing…
750
00:49:35,644 --> 00:49:39,308
…the small fish and insects
on which these creatures feed.
751
00:49:39,348 --> 00:49:44,581
All attempts to move the birds to
similar bodies of water have failed.
752
00:49:44,787 --> 00:49:48,784
Perhaps it is the familiarity alone
that keeps them here.
753
00:49:48,824 --> 00:49:52,988
Or perhaps it's an unwillingness
to lose the collective memory…
754
00:49:53,028 --> 00:49:56,191
…of the once-beautiful hills
that surround the lake.
755
00:49:56,231 --> 00:50:00,062
And it takes only seconds
for the fiddler crabs to realize…
756
00:50:00,102 --> 00:50:02,598
…that the wader
they might once have feared…
757
00:50:02,638 --> 00:50:05,129
…has now become their prey.
758
00:50:06,475 --> 00:50:09,342
The wounded bird knows its fate.
759
00:50:10,312 --> 00:50:12,608
Its desperate attempts to escape…
760
00:50:12,648 --> 00:50:16,278
…only underscore the hopelessness
of its plight.
761
00:50:18,987 --> 00:50:23,752
The primates' sad, soulful eyes
will be the first to be plucked out…
762
00:50:23,792 --> 00:50:26,755
…then sold to cosmetic companies
around the world…
763
00:50:26,795 --> 00:50:30,953
…for use in the testing of mascara
and artificial tears.
764
00:50:30,999 --> 00:50:35,030
Next, the monkeys' fur will be stripped
away from their limp corpses…
765
00:50:35,070 --> 00:50:38,600
…and sewn together
to form pillows and comforters.
766
00:50:38,640 --> 00:50:41,303
Mr Zebra thought he was gonna
take a nice drink.
767
00:50:41,343 --> 00:50:43,138
But you never know
who's gonna eat…
768
00:50:43,178 --> 00:50:45,607
…when you're dining
at Mother Nature's restaurant.
769
00:50:45,647 --> 00:50:48,510
That's gotta hurt. What does
this bald eagle wanna serve…
770
00:50:48,550 --> 00:50:50,746
…with some kidney beans
and a fine Chianti?
771
00:50:50,786 --> 00:50:54,779
It's an eel. And again:
772
00:50:54,990 --> 00:50:57,419
looks like old Mr Crocodile
wanted some antelope…
773
00:50:57,459 --> 00:50:59,655
…to clear that salty zebra
from his palate.
774
00:50:59,695 --> 00:51:03,225
Here's a struggle betting gentlemen
have been known to put money on.
775
00:51:03,265 --> 00:51:07,162
When a mongoose encounters a cobra
it's hard to know who's gonna win.
776
00:51:07,202 --> 00:51:09,531
But this time it looks like
it's… the cobra…
777
00:51:09,571 --> 00:51:11,834
…who's putting the squeeze
on the mongoose!
778
00:51:11,874 --> 00:51:14,269
But don't cash in your chips
just yet, gentlemen…
779
00:51:14,309 --> 00:51:18,599
…because now it's the mongoose
who holds the winning card!
780
00:51:44,306 --> 00:51:46,536
Hey! Hey!
781
00:51:47,309 --> 00:51:49,371
Hey, hey, hey! What are you doing⁈
782
00:51:49,411 --> 00:51:51,540
–Holy crapping hell.
–What the hell is that?
783
00:51:51,580 --> 00:51:53,942
–Stop the crane. Stop it.
–Stop the crane!
784
00:51:53,982 --> 00:51:56,028
–Hey.
–Hey, what are you doing?
785
00:51:56,151 --> 00:51:57,812
Us? What are you doing?
786
00:51:58,020 --> 00:51:59,681
I was watching TV.
787
00:51:59,888 --> 00:52:03,518
–Well, we're demolishing this place.
–Are you nuts? I live here!
788
00:52:03,558 --> 00:52:06,455
–Is that a TV?
–Yes, that's a TV! It's my TV!
789
00:52:06,495 --> 00:52:09,591
–Well, what's your TV doing in there?
–I said I live here, stupid!
790
00:52:09,631 --> 00:52:11,413
It's where I keep my stuff!
791
00:52:11,600 --> 00:52:14,899
My name's on the goddamn buzzer!
Harold Crick.
792
00:52:15,103 --> 00:52:18,072
Apartment 2-B, 1893 McCarthy!
793
00:52:19,041 --> 00:52:21,509
–Did you say 1893?
–Yes!
794
00:52:28,116 --> 00:52:30,245
I'm not exactly sure it was plot.
795
00:52:30,285 --> 00:52:33,482
I was hoping you'd say it was
just a really bad coincidence.
796
00:52:33,522 --> 00:52:37,119
Meeting an insurance agent the day
your policy runs out is coincidence.
797
00:52:37,159 --> 00:52:41,023
Getting a letter from the emperor
saying that he's visiting is plot.
798
00:52:41,063 --> 00:52:44,226
Having your apartment eaten
by a wrecking ball…
799
00:52:44,433 --> 00:52:46,281
…is something else entirely.
800
00:52:47,703 --> 00:52:51,161
Harold, you don't control your fate.
801
00:52:51,907 --> 00:52:54,342
–I know.
–You do?
802
00:52:55,912 --> 00:52:57,641
Okay. Come with me.
803
00:52:57,847 --> 00:53:00,748
Hey, Tom, can you leave that
till tomorrow?
804
00:53:01,317 --> 00:53:04,614
You were right.
This narrator might very well kill you…
805
00:53:04,654 --> 00:53:09,472
…so I humbly suggest that you just
forget all this and go live your life.
806
00:53:09,559 --> 00:53:14,509
Go live my life? I am living my life.
I'd like to continue to live my life.
807
00:53:14,564 --> 00:53:18,898
I know. Of course. I mean all of it.
However long you have left.
808
00:53:19,102 --> 00:53:22,699
You know, I mean, Howard,
you could use it to have an adventure.
809
00:53:22,739 --> 00:53:27,437
You know, invent something, or just
finish reading Crime and Punishment.
810
00:53:27,477 --> 00:53:31,741
Hell, Harold, you could just eat
nothing but pancakes if you wanted.
811
00:53:31,781 --> 00:53:33,772
What's wrong with you?
812
00:53:33,983 --> 00:53:37,280
Hey. I don't wanna eat
nothing but pancakes. I wanna live.
813
00:53:37,320 --> 00:53:40,483
Who in their right mind in a
choice between pancakes and living…
814
00:53:40,523 --> 00:53:41,651
…chooses pancakes?
815
00:53:41,691 --> 00:53:44,754
Harold, if you'd pause to think
I believe you'd realize…
816
00:53:44,794 --> 00:53:47,156
…that that answer's
inextricably contingent…
817
00:53:47,196 --> 00:53:49,391
…upon the type of life being led…
818
00:53:50,867 --> 00:53:53,961
…and, of course,
the quality of the pancakes.
819
00:53:55,838 --> 00:53:58,280
You don't understand
what I'm saying.
820
00:53:59,042 --> 00:54:00,066
Yes, I do.
821
00:54:01,310 --> 00:54:05,141
But you have to understand that this
isn't a philosophy or a literary theory…
822
00:54:05,181 --> 00:54:07,143
…or a story to me. It's my life.
823
00:54:07,183 --> 00:54:11,882
Absolutely. So just go make it the one
you've always wanted.
824
00:54:19,495 --> 00:54:21,491
I never expected
that they would have…
825
00:54:21,531 --> 00:54:23,526
–Do you want one, two?
–I want one.
826
00:54:23,566 --> 00:54:25,864
–One?
–I want two.
827
00:54:36,879 --> 00:54:38,775
All right, so here's your room.
828
00:54:38,815 --> 00:54:41,409
Or as I like to call it, Sleep Pod Two.
829
00:54:42,018 --> 00:54:43,315
Thanks, Dave.
830
00:54:43,519 --> 00:54:47,011
No problem, dude.
It'll be nice having you around.
831
00:54:48,057 --> 00:54:51,291
–How long you planning on staying?
–I'm not sure.
832
00:54:57,133 --> 00:55:01,627
Dave, can I pose a somewhat abstract,
purely hypothetical question?
833
00:55:02,105 --> 00:55:03,572
Sure.
834
00:55:04,273 --> 00:55:06,434
If you knew you were gonna die…
835
00:55:07,777 --> 00:55:09,608
…possibly soon…
836
00:55:10,012 --> 00:55:11,946
…what would you do?
837
00:55:13,783 --> 00:55:15,580
Wow, I don't know.
838
00:55:16,419 --> 00:55:18,548
Am I the richest man in the world?
839
00:55:18,588 --> 00:55:20,783
No, you're you.
840
00:55:22,425 --> 00:55:23,943
Do I have a superpower?
841
00:55:24,861 --> 00:55:26,158
No, you're you.
842
00:55:26,362 --> 00:55:30,162
I know I'm me,
but do I have a superpower?
843
00:55:30,967 --> 00:55:32,862
No, why would you
have a superpower?
844
00:55:32,902 --> 00:55:35,598
I don't know,
you said it was hypothetical.
845
00:55:35,638 --> 00:55:38,698
Fine. Yes. You're really good at math.
846
00:55:39,108 --> 00:55:41,418
That's not a power, that's a skill.
847
00:55:41,711 --> 00:55:44,273
Okay, you're good at math
and you're invisible.
848
00:55:44,313 --> 00:55:47,217
–And you know you're gonna die.
–Okay, okay.
849
00:55:47,884 --> 00:55:50,128
That's easy, I'd go to space camp.
850
00:55:50,820 --> 00:55:52,412
Space camp?
851
00:55:52,622 --> 00:55:57,638
Yeah, it's in Alabama. It's where kids
go to learn how to become astronauts.
852
00:55:58,327 --> 00:56:00,901
I've always wanted to go
since I was 9.
853
00:56:01,464 --> 00:56:04,368
You're invisible
and you'd go to space camp?
854
00:56:04,433 --> 00:56:07,469
I didn't pick invisible,
you picked invisible.
855
00:56:07,803 --> 00:56:10,377
Aren't you too old
to go to space camp?
856
00:56:11,040 --> 00:56:14,142
You're never too old
to go to space camp, dude.
857
00:56:45,141 --> 00:56:46,108
Space camp.
858
00:56:47,476 --> 00:56:50,206
One hundred and twenty-two
guitars.
859
00:56:50,246 --> 00:56:52,875
Seven hundred and thirty-two
strings.
860
00:56:52,915 --> 00:56:55,211
Two hundred and fifty-seven
pickups.
861
00:56:55,251 --> 00:56:58,743
One hundred and eighty-nine
volume knobs.
862
00:56:59,522 --> 00:57:04,824
Here Harold stood, face to face
with his oldest desire.
863
00:57:05,361 --> 00:57:08,353
And stand is almost all Harold did.
864
00:57:08,831 --> 00:57:11,857
It wasn't just about finding
a guitar.
865
00:57:12,068 --> 00:57:17,267
It was about finding a guitar
that said something about Harold.
866
00:57:17,473 --> 00:57:19,535
Unfortunately, this guitar said:
867
00:57:19,575 --> 00:57:23,944
when I get back to Georgia,
that woman gonna feel my pain.”
868
00:57:25,448 --> 00:57:27,743
This one said something
along the lines of:
869
00:57:27,783 --> 00:57:30,752
“Why, yes, these pants are Lycra.”
870
00:57:31,387 --> 00:57:34,217
These said, “I'm very sensitive,
very caring…
871
00:57:34,257 --> 00:57:38,349
…and I have absolutely no idea
how to play the guitar.”
872
00:57:41,964 --> 00:57:45,764
“I'm compensating for something.
Guess what.”
873
00:57:50,573 --> 00:57:52,553
And then Harold saw it.
874
00:57:53,442 --> 00:57:56,906
A damaged and terribly mistreated
sea-foam-green Fender…
875
00:57:56,946 --> 00:57:58,741
…staring back at him.
876
00:57:58,781 --> 00:58:00,676
Despite its obvious maladies…
877
00:58:00,716 --> 00:58:04,146
…the guitar spoke
with conviction and swagger.
878
00:58:04,186 --> 00:58:08,985
In fact, it looked Harold directly
in the eye and very plainly stated:
879
00:58:09,025 --> 00:58:11,721
“I rock.”
880
00:58:12,595 --> 00:58:14,056
Just breathe. Watch it!
881
00:58:14,096 --> 00:58:18,320
We've got a 21 -year-old male
with a gunshot wound to the chest.
882
00:58:18,834 --> 00:58:20,096
There you go.
883
00:58:20,469 --> 00:58:24,906
Shot in a gang fight?
Harold's not in a gang.
884
00:58:25,441 --> 00:58:27,375
Man in tweed?
885
00:58:29,578 --> 00:58:32,875
There's nothing wrong with him,
he just likes looking at sick people.
886
00:58:32,915 --> 00:58:35,110
Oddly spoken with disdain.
887
00:58:35,384 --> 00:58:36,817
This isn't working.
888
00:58:37,019 --> 00:58:39,593
Well… I don't even know
why we're here.
889
00:58:39,655 --> 00:58:41,517
I don't think we're supposed
to be here.
890
00:58:41,557 --> 00:58:44,954
–You said I needed visual stimuli.
–I meant a museum.
891
00:58:44,994 --> 00:58:47,323
I don't need a goddamn museum.
I need the infirm.
892
00:58:47,363 --> 00:58:49,354
You are the infirm.
893
00:58:49,865 --> 00:58:52,561
You're right. The problem is
these people aren't dead…
894
00:58:52,601 --> 00:58:54,647
…they're just severely injured.
895
00:58:55,237 --> 00:58:58,206
Excuse me,
where are the dying people?
896
00:58:59,608 --> 00:59:02,441
Most of these people
are sick or injured…
897
00:59:02,645 --> 00:59:04,707
Which is great, don't get me wrong.
898
00:59:04,747 --> 00:59:07,576
–But they're gonna get better,
which doesn't really help me.
899
00:59:07,616 --> 00:59:11,113
Is there any way to see the people
who aren't going to get better?
900
00:59:11,153 --> 00:59:12,120
Excuse me?
901
00:59:12,321 --> 00:59:15,685
I'd like to see, if at all possible,
the ones who aren't gonna make it.
902
00:59:15,725 --> 00:59:17,520
You know, the dead-for-sure ones.
903
00:59:17,560 --> 00:59:20,398
I'm sorry,
are you suffering from anything?
904
00:59:22,732 --> 00:59:24,928
Just writer's block.
905
00:59:32,709 --> 00:59:34,821
With every awkward strum…
906
00:59:34,978 --> 00:59:38,436
…Harold Crick became stronger
in who he was…
907
00:59:38,648 --> 00:59:42,379
…what he wanted,
and why he was alive.
908
00:59:43,620 --> 00:59:46,487
Harold no longer ate alone.
909
00:59:46,723 --> 00:59:49,920
He no longer counted brushstrokes.
910
00:59:50,127 --> 00:59:52,689
–Harold, I'll see you.
–He no longer wore neckties.
911
00:59:52,729 --> 00:59:53,696
Bye, Dave.
912
00:59:53,964 --> 00:59:59,178
And, therefore, no longer worried
about the time it took to put them on.
913
01:00:01,138 --> 01:00:05,165
He no longer counted his steps
to the bus stop.
914
01:00:07,644 --> 01:00:12,946
Instead, Harold did that
which had terrified him before.
915
01:00:13,150 --> 01:00:16,480
That which had eluded him
Monday through Friday…
916
01:00:16,520 --> 01:00:19,683
…for so many years.
917
01:00:19,890 --> 01:00:22,386
That which the unrelenting lyrics…
918
01:00:22,426 --> 01:00:26,658
…of numerous punk-rock songs
told him to do:
919
01:00:27,097 --> 01:00:30,498
Harold Crick lived his life.
920
01:00:39,709 --> 01:00:42,507
But despite resuscitating his life…
921
01:00:42,712 --> 01:00:46,936
…reviving his hope, and instilling
a few wicked calluses…
922
01:00:46,950 --> 01:00:50,078
…Harold's journey
was still incomplete.
923
01:00:50,987 --> 01:00:56,926
And Harold's wristwatch wasn't about
to let him miss another opportunity.
924
01:01:05,735 --> 01:01:07,430
Ms Pascal?
925
01:01:07,637 --> 01:01:10,367
–Ms Pascal?
–Mr Crick.
926
01:01:11,074 --> 01:01:13,565
–Hi.
–Hi.
927
01:01:14,010 --> 01:01:16,570
–Hi.
–Hi.
928
01:01:16,780 --> 01:01:18,748
I'm glad I caught you.
929
01:01:19,583 --> 01:01:20,880
Oh, yeah? Why?
930
01:01:22,185 --> 01:01:25,552
Because I wanted
to bring these to you.
931
01:01:27,324 --> 01:01:29,519
–Really?
–Yeah.
932
01:01:29,726 --> 01:01:34,095
So you can't accept gifts,
but you can give them?
933
01:01:35,031 --> 01:01:36,293
–Listen…
–I don't know.
934
01:01:36,333 --> 01:01:38,929
That seems a little inconsistent,
doesn't it, Mr Crick?
935
01:01:38,969 --> 01:01:40,363
Very inconsistent, yes.
936
01:01:40,403 --> 01:01:42,899
I'll tell you what.
I'll purchase them.
937
01:01:42,939 --> 01:01:44,589
–No.
–No, no, no, really…
938
01:01:44,608 --> 01:01:47,380
…I'd like to purchase them.
What are they?
939
01:01:47,944 --> 01:01:49,343
Flours.
940
01:01:50,013 --> 01:01:53,449
–What?
–I brought you flours.
941
01:02:04,327 --> 01:02:08,320
And you carried them
all the way here?
942
01:02:09,966 --> 01:02:15,097
Ms Pascal, I've been odd
and I know that I've been odd.
943
01:02:16,139 --> 01:02:18,937
And I want you.
944
01:02:19,476 --> 01:02:21,944
–What?
–There's so many reasons.
945
01:02:22,145 --> 01:02:25,475
There's so many influences in my life
that are telling me…
946
01:02:25,515 --> 01:02:27,231
…at times quite literally…
947
01:02:27,284 --> 01:02:30,254
…that I should come here
and bring you these…
948
01:02:31,154 --> 01:02:33,728
…but I'm doing this
because I want you.
949
01:02:34,558 --> 01:02:36,423
You want me?
950
01:02:36,927 --> 01:02:39,452
In no uncertain terms.
951
01:02:42,265 --> 01:02:47,498
Isn't there some very clear
and established…
952
01:02:47,704 --> 01:02:51,333
…rule about fraternization?
953
01:02:51,541 --> 01:02:53,736
–Auditor-auditee protocol?
–Yeah.
954
01:02:53,944 --> 01:02:56,208
Yeah, but I don't care.
955
01:02:56,780 --> 01:02:59,943
–Why?
–Because I want you.
956
01:03:05,488 --> 01:03:06,455
Well…
957
01:03:08,725 --> 01:03:11,959
…do you mind carrying those
a little bit further?
958
01:03:12,462 --> 01:03:13,793
Okay.
959
01:03:16,566 --> 01:03:17,965
Okay.
960
01:03:31,815 --> 01:03:33,612
Did you make a key?
961
01:03:33,817 --> 01:03:36,061
No, I just committed it to memory.
962
01:03:36,186 --> 01:03:40,247
–The blue, that's barley flour.
–What's that one?
963
01:03:40,457 --> 01:03:41,822
–The orange?
–Yeah.
964
01:03:42,025 --> 01:03:43,617
I forget.
965
01:03:44,227 --> 01:03:45,194
Right here.
966
01:03:48,832 --> 01:03:50,527
Do you wanna come up?
967
01:03:53,003 --> 01:03:55,528
–To your place?
–Yeah.
968
01:03:57,140 --> 01:03:59,074
I guess I could.
969
01:03:59,275 --> 01:04:03,211
Wasn't that the idea with the flours
and everything?
970
01:04:04,714 --> 01:04:08,878
Honestly, I only figured it out
up to “I want you.”
971
01:04:09,886 --> 01:04:11,877
Listen, Mr Crick…
972
01:04:12,856 --> 01:04:14,346
…I think I like you.
973
01:04:15,291 --> 01:04:20,627
And before I do anything rash,
I'd like to make sure.
974
01:04:22,132 --> 01:04:24,191
I'd like you to come up.
975
01:04:25,735 --> 01:04:27,566
I'd be honored.
976
01:04:28,738 --> 01:04:30,137
Great.
977
01:04:33,476 --> 01:04:35,071
Yeah, he was nuts though.
978
01:04:35,111 --> 01:04:38,975
He got caught when he tried
to get the contract notarized.
979
01:04:39,015 --> 01:04:41,779
No. No.
980
01:04:46,356 --> 01:04:47,653
Was it good?
981
01:04:48,258 --> 01:04:49,225
Thank you.
982
01:04:49,426 --> 01:04:51,894
–You're welcome.
–Can I help you?
983
01:04:52,095 --> 01:04:56,385
No, no, I'm gonna put them in the sink.
Go sit down on the couch.
984
01:05:05,041 --> 01:05:06,757
So do you play the guitar?
985
01:05:06,810 --> 01:05:09,301
–What?
–Do you play the guitar?
986
01:05:09,979 --> 01:05:14,245
Terribly. Someone traded me that
for a wedding cake.
987
01:05:14,451 --> 01:05:18,080
Does that mean I have to claim it
on my taxes now?
988
01:05:18,288 --> 01:05:22,748
–No. I'll leave it out of my final report.
–Oh, thanks.
989
01:05:23,727 --> 01:05:25,058
Do you play?
990
01:05:25,261 --> 01:05:26,923
Not really. I only know one song.
991
01:05:26,963 --> 01:05:28,362
Oh, play it.
992
01:05:28,565 --> 01:05:30,960
No, I don't know it that well, actually.
993
01:05:31,000 --> 01:05:34,030
No, come on. I promise I'm not gonna
laugh at you. Play it.
994
01:05:34,070 --> 01:05:36,314
No, no, no. Maybe some other time.
995
01:05:36,473 --> 01:05:37,997
All right.
996
01:08:03,587 --> 01:08:04,849
Ms Pascal?
997
01:08:05,356 --> 01:08:08,553
–I…
–I know.
998
01:08:08,759 --> 01:08:10,727
I want you too.
999
01:08:30,648 --> 01:08:36,280
Harold's life was filled with moments
both significant and mundane.
1000
01:08:36,487 --> 01:08:41,754
But to Harold, those moments
remained entirely indistinguishable…
1001
01:08:41,959 --> 01:08:43,654
…except for this.
1002
01:08:44,328 --> 01:08:49,197
As Ana let out a soft sigh and
repositioned herself against him…
1003
01:08:49,400 --> 01:08:51,695
…Harold knew
somewhere in his heart…
1004
01:08:51,735 --> 01:08:54,698
…that this was one
of the significant moments.
1005
01:08:54,738 --> 01:08:58,606
He knew she was
falling in love with him.
1006
01:09:01,111 --> 01:09:03,140
Professor Hilbert. It's a comedy.
1007
01:09:03,180 --> 01:09:04,909
–What?
–A comedy.
1008
01:09:05,582 --> 01:09:09,575
The woman. The one who hates me.
Ana Pascal?
1009
01:09:09,787 --> 01:09:11,880
–Last night…
–Yeah?
1010
01:09:12,089 --> 01:09:13,884
She's falling in love with me.
1011
01:09:13,924 --> 01:09:15,853
–She is?
–It's like a miracle.
1012
01:09:15,893 --> 01:09:18,389
The voice confirmed it
in the middle of the night.
1013
01:09:18,429 --> 01:09:19,990
Well, that's wonderful, Harold.
1014
01:09:20,030 --> 01:09:23,227
I mean, it completely nullifies my list,
but that's fantastic.
1015
01:09:23,267 --> 01:09:24,359
What list?
1016
01:09:24,568 --> 01:09:26,931
These are seven living authors
whose prior work…
1017
01:09:26,971 --> 01:09:29,833
…would seem to make them
candidates to write your story…
1018
01:09:29,873 --> 01:09:32,736
…based on the criteria you and I
previously determined.
1019
01:09:32,776 --> 01:09:36,974
If your narrator is alive,
she's on this list.
1020
01:09:37,715 --> 01:09:40,778
But it appears the list
is of little use to you now.
1021
01:09:40,818 --> 01:09:42,947
Now that you're gonna live
happily ever after.
1022
01:09:42,987 --> 01:09:47,673
Oh, goodie. This woman, Karen Eiffel,
she's one of my favorite authors.
1023
01:09:47,758 --> 01:09:49,089
–Hi.
–Hi.
1024
01:09:49,293 --> 01:09:51,555
Beautiful tragedies. Just beautiful.
Anyway…
1025
01:09:51,595 --> 01:09:56,123
…let me quickly copy this list for you,
just in case.
1026
01:09:57,835 --> 01:10:00,235
Sociopathic author.
1027
01:10:00,437 --> 01:10:03,099
–I just wanted to thank you.
–Of course.
1028
01:10:03,574 --> 01:10:07,671
Listen, please, you must tell me if you
hear the voice of the narrator again…
1029
01:10:07,711 --> 01:10:09,340
…just for my own edification.
1030
01:10:09,380 --> 01:10:10,870
I will.
1031
01:10:13,517 --> 01:10:16,180
Well, it's called Death and Taxes.
1032
01:10:16,220 --> 01:10:18,950
Wow. You know, I'm from Texas.
1033
01:10:19,156 --> 01:10:22,717
No. Not “Texas.” Taxes.
1034
01:10:22,926 --> 01:10:25,121
Death and Taxes.
Death and Taxes.
1035
01:10:25,329 --> 01:10:27,424
Taxes. Like the
Benjamin Franklin quote.
1036
01:10:27,464 --> 01:10:29,329
Precisely so.
1037
01:10:29,533 --> 01:10:31,628
This lady's a package,
I'm telling you.
1038
01:10:31,668 --> 01:10:35,332
Tell us, what is this next book
going to be about?
1039
01:10:35,372 --> 01:10:37,840
It's about interconnectivity.
1040
01:10:39,143 --> 01:10:41,805
The looming certainty of death.
1041
01:10:42,012 --> 01:10:43,807
Men's fashion accessories.
1042
01:10:43,847 --> 01:10:45,893
–Oh, my God, that's her.
–What?
1043
01:10:45,949 --> 01:10:49,179
–That's the voice. She's the narrator.
–No, that can't be right.
1044
01:10:49,219 --> 01:10:50,880
No, I'm positive.
1045
01:10:51,088 --> 01:10:53,596
Harold, this interview's a decade old.
1046
01:10:53,690 --> 01:10:56,520
I didn't think anyone actually
wore cuff links anymore.
1047
01:10:56,560 --> 01:10:58,255
That's her.
1048
01:10:58,462 --> 01:11:01,192
–She's British?
–She's her.
1049
01:11:01,398 --> 01:11:04,896
–Karen Eiffel?
–Professor Hilbert, I know that voice.
1050
01:11:05,536 --> 01:11:06,503
Crap.
1051
01:11:07,304 --> 01:11:09,767
–What's wrong?
–First of all, she wasn't on my list.
1052
01:11:09,807 --> 01:11:14,471
I figured you would have mentioned
the accent and she doesn't…
1053
01:11:15,813 --> 01:11:16,935
She kills people.
1054
01:11:18,015 --> 01:11:20,449
–What?
–In every book she…
1055
01:11:20,651 --> 01:11:23,380
The books are all about…
They die. She kills them.
1056
01:11:23,420 --> 01:11:26,355
–Kills who?
–The heroes.
1057
01:11:26,557 --> 01:11:29,065
Four Black Veils. What is that?
1058
01:11:29,159 --> 01:11:31,955
It's about a girl who loses
several members of her family…
1059
01:11:31,995 --> 01:11:33,757
…in quick succession.
1060
01:11:33,797 --> 01:11:35,025
Where is she?
1061
01:11:35,232 --> 01:11:40,260
She's untraceable. Believe me,
I used to teach a class on her.
1062
01:11:40,471 --> 01:11:43,901
I've written her letters. I mean,
she's a hermit, she's a recluse.
1063
01:11:43,941 --> 01:11:47,206
Here. Here's the last book she wrote.
1064
01:11:47,411 --> 01:11:50,641
Look at the copyright. She hasn't
published anything in 10 years.
1065
01:11:50,681 --> 01:11:53,177
She had knowledge of the city.
Does she live here?
1066
01:11:53,217 --> 01:11:54,845
She used to, yes, but I mean…
1067
01:11:54,885 --> 01:11:58,015
Banneker Press. 2267 Wallace Street.
Is that her publisher?
1068
01:11:58,055 --> 01:12:01,385
You're not listening. I said even
if you find her she's not gonna…
1069
01:12:01,425 --> 01:12:03,009
Thank you for your help.
1070
01:12:03,026 --> 01:12:04,789
She only writes tragedies!
1071
01:12:04,995 --> 01:12:06,975
I don't believe in God.
1072
01:12:34,492 --> 01:12:37,393
Okay, he's bringing her flours.
1073
01:12:48,973 --> 01:12:51,567
Kay, where you been?
1074
01:12:52,577 --> 01:12:55,478
I went out to buy cigarettes…
1075
01:12:55,680 --> 01:12:58,584
…and I figured out
how to kill Harold Crick.
1076
01:12:59,717 --> 01:13:01,048
Buying cigarettes?
1077
01:13:01,252 --> 01:13:04,688
As I was…
When I came out of the store…
1078
01:13:04,989 --> 01:13:07,253
…it came to me.
1079
01:13:07,926 --> 01:13:09,223
How?
1080
01:13:09,427 --> 01:13:11,856
Well, Penny,
like anything worth writing…
1081
01:13:11,896 --> 01:13:14,956
…it came inexplicably
and without method.
1082
01:13:15,166 --> 01:13:18,397
I see. Then what happens?
1083
01:13:19,237 --> 01:13:23,601
It's perfect, actually. I can't believe
I didn't think of it earlier.
1084
01:13:23,641 --> 01:13:26,576
It's simple, ironic…
1085
01:13:27,078 --> 01:13:29,273
…possibly heartbreaking.
1086
01:13:30,582 --> 01:13:31,913
Is that it?
1087
01:13:32,250 --> 01:13:33,308
Yes.
1088
01:13:33,518 --> 01:13:36,356
–You wrote it on legal sheets?
–On the bus.
1089
01:13:37,956 --> 01:13:39,321
Well, then.
1090
01:13:42,694 --> 01:13:47,131
So I'll finish it today.
1091
01:13:49,200 --> 01:13:51,114
I'll let the publishers know.
1092
01:13:51,636 --> 01:13:53,661
I'll begin packing my things.
1093
01:13:53,871 --> 01:13:55,839
I appreciate it.
1094
01:14:12,023 --> 01:14:14,457
–Hi. Hello. Hi.
–May I help you?
1095
01:14:14,659 --> 01:14:16,771
I need to speak to Karen Eiffel.
1096
01:14:16,894 --> 01:14:18,423
–I'm sorry?
–Karen Eiffel.
1097
01:14:18,463 --> 01:14:20,825
She's one of your authors.
I need to talk to her.
1098
01:14:20,865 --> 01:14:22,799
Well, sir, she's not here.
1099
01:14:23,001 --> 01:14:26,264
No. No, I know. I need to find her.
I need to know where she is.
1100
01:14:26,304 --> 01:14:27,732
We're just the publishers.
1101
01:14:27,772 --> 01:14:32,062
Right. Of course. But there must be
a way that I can contact her.
1102
01:14:32,210 --> 01:14:34,539
We have the address
where her fan mail is sent.
1103
01:14:34,579 --> 01:14:36,889
No, I can't send mail. It's urgent.
1104
01:14:37,548 --> 01:14:38,868
How do you know her?
1105
01:14:39,917 --> 01:14:42,511
–I'm her brother.
–Her brother?
1106
01:14:43,054 --> 01:14:46,023
–Her brother-in-law.
–She has a sister?
1107
01:14:46,758 --> 01:14:49,090
No, I'm married to her brother.
1108
01:14:49,994 --> 01:14:52,622
Not in this state, the one over.
1109
01:14:54,599 --> 01:14:57,864
Sir, I'm gonna have to ask you
to leave.
1110
01:14:58,069 --> 01:15:00,367
No. Okay. Listen.
1111
01:15:02,206 --> 01:15:07,166
I'm one of her characters. I'm new.
I'm in her new book.
1112
01:15:07,378 --> 01:15:11,781
And she's going to kill me.
Not actually. But in the book.
1113
01:15:11,983 --> 01:15:15,747
But I think it'll actually kill me
so I just need to talk to her…
1114
01:15:15,787 --> 01:15:17,948
…and ask her to stop.
1115
01:15:31,569 --> 01:15:34,402
Hi, Harold. Nice sweater.
1116
01:15:37,575 --> 01:15:39,137
Hi, Harold. Phones are out.
1117
01:15:39,177 --> 01:15:41,289
Hey, Harold, 19 percent of 4632?
1118
01:15:45,183 --> 01:15:47,447
Hey, Harold. Back from your vaca?
1119
01:15:47,652 --> 01:15:50,052
Hey. Looking good.
1120
01:15:50,855 --> 01:15:53,297
–He looks terrible.
–Yeah, banged up.
1121
01:15:54,892 --> 01:15:56,921
Wherever he went,
I do not want to go.
1122
01:15:56,961 --> 01:15:58,326
Book me not there.
1123
01:16:01,566 --> 01:16:03,216
He's totally ignoring me.
1124
01:16:06,471 --> 01:16:08,399
Here, look at this now.
There he goes.
1125
01:16:08,439 --> 01:16:09,957
It was good having you.
1126
01:16:33,164 --> 01:16:36,127
–Oh, dude, the phones are out.
–Can I borrow your cell phone?
1127
01:16:36,167 --> 01:16:38,431
–The signal's down.
–Damn it.
1128
01:16:38,636 --> 01:16:41,144
–You all right?
–Dave, I need a favor.
1129
01:16:41,339 --> 01:16:44,177
–Sure, what is it?
–Can I have some change?
1130
01:16:47,345 --> 01:16:50,541
Within moments, Harold found himself
running across the plaza…
1131
01:16:50,581 --> 01:16:53,353
…heading for the nearest
pay phone.
1132
01:16:55,853 --> 01:16:57,833
At last, he spotted it.
1133
01:16:59,891 --> 01:17:02,987
But as Harold neared the phone,
he saw it was occupied…
1134
01:17:03,027 --> 01:17:06,491
…by an octogenarian determined
to reach his daughter in Denver…
1135
01:17:06,531 --> 01:17:08,760
…no matter how many quarters
it took.
1136
01:17:08,800 --> 01:17:11,262
Fortunately, Harold remembered
a bank of phones…
1137
01:17:11,302 --> 01:17:13,231
…in the Sixth Street subway tunnel.
1138
01:17:13,271 --> 01:17:17,957
The baby's name isn't Mrs. Epstein.
My daughter's name is Mrs. Epstein.
1139
01:17:34,625 --> 01:17:37,925
The first phone
failed to give a dial tone.
1140
01:17:38,095 --> 01:17:40,057
And the second
seemed to be splattered…
1141
01:17:40,097 --> 01:17:42,473
…with a fresh batch of mucus.
1142
01:17:44,302 --> 01:17:46,531
Harold dialed the third phone…
1143
01:17:46,571 --> 01:17:51,785
…fervently making sure to give each
number key a specific forceful push.
1144
01:18:12,797 --> 01:18:14,230
Don't answer that!
1145
01:18:14,432 --> 01:18:16,742
Didn't you say this phone never r…?
1146
01:18:44,462 --> 01:18:46,760
–Hello?
–Is this Karen Eiffel?
1147
01:18:46,964 --> 01:18:48,793
–Yes.
–My name is Harold Crick.
1148
01:18:48,833 --> 01:18:51,605
I believe you're writing a story
about me.
1149
01:18:52,003 --> 01:18:55,804
–I'm sorry?
–My name is Harold Crick.
1150
01:18:56,508 --> 01:18:58,999
–Is this a joke?
–No.
1151
01:18:59,211 --> 01:19:02,441
No, I work for the IRS. My name,
Miss Eiffel, is Harold Crick.
1152
01:19:02,481 --> 01:19:06,011
When I go through the files at work
I hear a deep and endless ocean.
1153
01:19:06,051 --> 01:19:08,918
–Oh, G…!
–Miss Eiffel?
1154
01:19:09,855 --> 01:19:11,413
Hello?
1155
01:19:11,623 --> 01:19:13,750
Miss Eiffel? Hello?
1156
01:19:21,066 --> 01:19:22,260
Let him in.
1157
01:19:34,980 --> 01:19:36,277
Hello.
1158
01:19:36,748 --> 01:19:37,874
Hello.
1159
01:19:39,084 --> 01:19:40,946
I'm Penny. I'm Kay's assistant.
1160
01:19:40,986 --> 01:19:43,887
Oh, I'm Harold. Her main character.
1161
01:20:02,240 --> 01:20:03,867
Oh, my God.
1162
01:20:07,646 --> 01:20:09,273
Oh, my God.
1163
01:20:10,649 --> 01:20:12,276
Oh, my God.
1164
01:20:17,489 --> 01:20:18,751
Miss Eiffel?
1165
01:20:19,224 --> 01:20:22,421
Your hair. Your eyes.
1166
01:20:23,662 --> 01:20:25,220
Your fingers.
1167
01:20:27,466 --> 01:20:29,434
Your shoes.
1168
01:20:32,504 --> 01:20:33,698
Hello.
1169
01:20:37,909 --> 01:20:39,900
I'm Harold Crick.
1170
01:20:40,646 --> 01:20:42,375
I know.
1171
01:20:44,349 --> 01:20:45,669
How did you find me?
1172
01:20:46,618 --> 01:20:50,019
We audited you
a little more than 10 years ago…
1173
01:20:50,222 --> 01:20:52,400
…and your number was in the file.
1174
01:20:52,424 --> 01:20:57,054
I'm sorry,
but this is incredibly strange.
1175
01:20:57,262 --> 01:20:58,923
You're telling me.
1176
01:20:59,631 --> 01:21:01,743
Didn't you think you were crazy?
1177
01:21:02,367 --> 01:21:03,857
Sort of.
1178
01:21:04,069 --> 01:21:07,799
But then you were right
about everything. Like, everything.
1179
01:21:07,839 --> 01:21:10,202
And then you said,
“Little did he know.”
1180
01:21:10,242 --> 01:21:14,372
–“Little did he know”?
–Yeah. It's third-person omniscient.
1181
01:21:15,013 --> 01:21:16,207
Jesus.
1182
01:21:16,415 --> 01:21:20,145
Which meant it was, well, you know,
someone other than me.
1183
01:21:20,185 --> 01:21:22,914
At least that's what
Professor Hilbert said.
1184
01:21:22,954 --> 01:21:25,047
Professor Hilbert?
1185
01:21:25,390 --> 01:21:27,502
–Professor Jules Hilbert?
–Yeah.
1186
01:21:28,360 --> 01:21:30,328
Yeah, he loves your books.
1187
01:21:31,229 --> 01:21:34,164
I love his letters. I don't…
1188
01:21:34,366 --> 01:21:36,561
So you understand
why I had to find you…
1189
01:21:36,601 --> 01:21:39,832
…and ask you not to kill me.
–What?
1190
01:21:40,305 --> 01:21:43,341
I mean, obviously
you haven't written the end.
1191
01:21:44,209 --> 01:21:45,176
Harold…
1192
01:21:45,377 --> 01:21:49,609
I mean, now since we've met
and you can see that I exist…
1193
01:21:49,815 --> 01:21:51,993
…you're not gonna kill me, right?
1194
01:21:54,720 --> 01:21:56,347
Have you written it?
1195
01:21:56,888 --> 01:21:58,446
I can… No.
1196
01:21:58,657 --> 01:22:00,719
–Have you written it?
–An outline.
1197
01:22:00,759 --> 01:22:02,788
Okay. But it's just an outline, right?
1198
01:22:02,828 --> 01:22:04,610
–Yeah, sort of.
–“Sort of”?
1199
01:22:04,629 --> 01:22:06,324
–It's just not typed.
–“Not typed”⁈
1200
01:22:06,364 --> 01:22:08,026
–Maybe that's okay.
–What does that mean?
1201
01:22:08,066 --> 01:22:11,630
–I'm sorry, I'm trying to write a book.
–What do you mean it's “okay”?
1202
01:22:11,670 --> 01:22:13,865
–What do you mean you're sorry?
–Kay.
1203
01:22:13,905 --> 01:22:15,668
Let him read it.
1204
01:22:18,510 --> 01:22:20,273
Let him read it.
1205
01:22:35,127 --> 01:22:37,561
–Did you find her?
–Yeah.
1206
01:22:38,029 --> 01:22:41,362
–And?
–I may already be dead…
1207
01:22:41,566 --> 01:22:43,363
…just not typed.
1208
01:22:44,402 --> 01:22:45,391
Is that it?
1209
01:22:47,439 --> 01:22:48,736
Did you read it?
1210
01:22:48,940 --> 01:22:51,238
I tried, but I couldn't.
1211
01:22:52,811 --> 01:22:54,745
You have to read it.
1212
01:22:55,280 --> 01:22:58,376
You have to tell me
what to do or what not to do.
1213
01:22:58,416 --> 01:23:00,850
If I can avoid it…
1214
01:23:02,254 --> 01:23:04,222
If I have a chance…
1215
01:23:04,656 --> 01:23:06,146
Please.
1216
01:23:12,998 --> 01:23:14,465
Okay.
1217
01:23:15,133 --> 01:23:16,327
Okay.
1218
01:23:55,207 --> 01:23:57,300
And here's your uniform.
1219
01:23:58,510 --> 01:24:02,470
It's a go. Banetta's outside,
she'll assign you your locker.
1220
01:24:03,481 --> 01:24:06,382
–And you roll.
–I'm ready.
1221
01:25:03,642 --> 01:25:05,405
Professor Hilbert?
1222
01:25:07,279 --> 01:25:09,543
–Hi, Harold.
–Hi.
1223
01:25:11,483 --> 01:25:12,814
You look tired.
1224
01:25:13,551 --> 01:25:15,849
No, no, just calm.
1225
01:25:19,291 --> 01:25:21,156
Harold, I'm sorry.
1226
01:25:24,864 --> 01:25:26,593
You have to die.
1227
01:25:27,600 --> 01:25:28,794
What?
1228
01:25:29,001 --> 01:25:31,492
It's her masterpiece.
1229
01:25:33,806 --> 01:25:39,005
It's possibly the most important novel
in her already stunning career…
1230
01:25:39,211 --> 01:25:42,874
…and it's absolutely no good
unless you die at the end.
1231
01:25:43,950 --> 01:25:45,912
I've been over it again and again…
1232
01:25:45,952 --> 01:25:49,581
…and I know how hard this is
for you to hear.
1233
01:25:53,659 --> 01:25:56,924
You're asking me
to knowingly face my death?
1234
01:25:58,030 --> 01:25:59,657
Yes.
1235
01:26:01,200 --> 01:26:02,827
Really?
1236
01:26:03,803 --> 01:26:05,100
Yes.
1237
01:26:14,814 --> 01:26:19,274
I thought you'd…
I thought you'd find something.
1238
01:26:20,419 --> 01:26:21,716
I'm sorry, Harold.
1239
01:26:24,523 --> 01:26:29,051
Can't we just try and just see
if she can change it?
1240
01:26:29,261 --> 01:26:31,729
–No.
–No?
1241
01:26:31,931 --> 01:26:33,330
Harold…
1242
01:26:34,200 --> 01:26:37,465
…in the grand scheme
it wouldn't matter.
1243
01:26:39,672 --> 01:26:42,470
–Yes, it would.
–No.
1244
01:26:44,577 --> 01:26:46,545
I could change.
1245
01:26:48,781 --> 01:26:50,908
I could quit my job.
1246
01:26:51,117 --> 01:26:53,745
I could go away with Ana.
1247
01:26:54,186 --> 01:26:56,780
I could be someone else.
1248
01:26:57,623 --> 01:26:59,716
Harold, listen to me.
1249
01:26:59,925 --> 01:27:02,325
I can't die right now.
1250
01:27:04,864 --> 01:27:07,389
It's just really bad timing.
1251
01:27:09,835 --> 01:27:13,333
No one wants to die, Harold,
but unfortunately we do.
1252
01:27:14,740 --> 01:27:16,264
Harold…
1253
01:27:16,942 --> 01:27:18,933
Harold, listen to me.
1254
01:27:21,047 --> 01:27:24,175
Harold, you will die someday,
sometime.
1255
01:27:24,383 --> 01:27:26,544
Heart failure at the bank.
1256
01:27:27,053 --> 01:27:29,248
Choke on a mint.
1257
01:27:30,189 --> 01:27:33,686
Some long, drawn-out disease
you contracted on vacation.
1258
01:27:33,726 --> 01:27:37,457
You will die. You will absolutely die.
1259
01:27:38,297 --> 01:27:41,755
Even if you avoid this death,
another will find you.
1260
01:27:41,967 --> 01:27:47,803
And I guarantee that it won't be nearly
as poetic or meaningful…
1261
01:27:48,207 --> 01:27:50,175
…as what she's written.
1262
01:27:53,512 --> 01:27:55,343
I'm sorry…
1263
01:27:56,549 --> 01:27:59,585
…but it's the nature of all tragedies,
Harold.
1264
01:28:00,252 --> 01:28:04,086
The hero dies,
but the story lives on forever.
1265
01:28:42,561 --> 01:28:47,049
–There's an empty seat right there.
–No, I wanna sit down over here.
1266
01:29:22,468 --> 01:29:23,833
Kay?
1267
01:29:35,414 --> 01:29:36,813
Kay?
1268
01:29:39,451 --> 01:29:42,284
How many people
do you think I've killed?
1269
01:29:44,356 --> 01:29:46,654
–Kay.
–How many?
1270
01:29:47,159 --> 01:29:48,611
–I don't know.
–Eight.
1271
01:29:49,295 --> 01:29:53,459
–Kay…
–I've killed eight people. I counted.
1272
01:29:54,099 --> 01:29:55,828
They're fictional. Get up.
1273
01:29:56,035 --> 01:29:58,003
Harold Crick isn't fictional.
1274
01:29:58,437 --> 01:30:01,201
–I don't…
–He isn't fictional, Penny.
1275
01:30:02,274 --> 01:30:06,498
Every book I've ever written ends
with someone dying. Every one.
1276
01:30:07,112 --> 01:30:09,512
Really nice people too.
1277
01:30:09,715 --> 01:30:13,674
The book about Helen
the schoolteacher.
1278
01:30:14,787 --> 01:30:19,952
I killed her
the day before summer vacation.
1279
01:30:20,726 --> 01:30:22,785
How cruel is that?
1280
01:30:23,262 --> 01:30:26,629
And the civil engineer, Edward.
1281
01:30:26,832 --> 01:30:28,265
The one I trapped…
1282
01:30:28,467 --> 01:30:33,996
…with a heart attack in rush hour.
1283
01:30:34,206 --> 01:30:36,037
I killed him.
1284
01:30:37,810 --> 01:30:39,835
I killed…
1285
01:30:40,913 --> 01:30:43,006
Penny, I killed them all.
1286
01:31:16,782 --> 01:31:19,182
Miss Eiffel? Miss Eiffel?
1287
01:31:20,486 --> 01:31:22,351
–Harold.
–Hi.
1288
01:31:22,621 --> 01:31:25,988
–I just finished it.
–You just…
1289
01:31:26,191 --> 01:31:29,029
Yeah, I read it all in one read
on the bus.
1290
01:31:29,895 --> 01:31:31,556
It's lovely.
1291
01:31:31,764 --> 01:31:34,008
I like the part about the guitars.
1292
01:31:34,967 --> 01:31:38,835
Well, thanks, thanks. Goo…
Well, listen, I'm…
1293
01:31:39,038 --> 01:31:43,600
No, I read it and I loved it.
And there's only one way it can end.
1294
01:31:44,410 --> 01:31:48,107
I mean, I don't have much background
in literary anything…
1295
01:31:48,147 --> 01:31:50,127
…but this seems simple enough.
1296
01:31:53,119 --> 01:31:56,520
I love your book.
And I think you should finish it.
1297
01:32:13,773 --> 01:32:15,835
The night before his death…
1298
01:32:15,875 --> 01:32:19,901
…Harold unsuspectingly went about
some usual business.
1299
01:32:21,014 --> 01:32:23,786
He finished his outstanding audits.
1300
01:32:25,418 --> 01:32:28,114
He made a few phone calls
he had been putting off.
1301
01:32:28,154 --> 01:32:31,954
Listen, does your program
have an age limit?
1302
01:32:32,625 --> 01:32:35,133
And he traveled to Ms Pascal's…
1303
01:32:35,228 --> 01:32:38,625
…where she made him meat loaf
and chocolate pudding…
1304
01:32:38,665 --> 01:32:41,327
…and the two watched old movies.
1305
01:32:43,103 --> 01:32:44,898
It was a nice enough evening.
1306
01:32:44,938 --> 01:32:49,426
And in any other circumstance
it would've seemed commonplace.
1307
01:32:49,442 --> 01:32:53,006
In fact, the only thing
that made this night significant…
1308
01:32:53,046 --> 01:32:55,422
…was the morning it preceded.
1309
01:33:01,121 --> 01:33:03,419
I have to tell you something.
1310
01:33:03,623 --> 01:33:04,920
You do?
1311
01:33:05,825 --> 01:33:07,486
I do.
1312
01:33:08,294 --> 01:33:11,388
–Is it a secret?
–Sort of.
1313
01:33:11,598 --> 01:33:13,088
Tell me.
1314
01:33:14,801 --> 01:33:16,769
I adore you.
1315
01:33:19,973 --> 01:33:22,066
I adore you too.
1316
01:33:24,778 --> 01:33:28,214
–That it?
–No.
1317
01:33:29,416 --> 01:33:31,213
I have to tell you this.
1318
01:33:31,418 --> 01:33:34,012
I just want you to listen carefully.
1319
01:33:34,220 --> 01:33:35,778
Okay.
1320
01:33:37,123 --> 01:33:41,253
You can deduct the value
of all the food you give away…
1321
01:33:41,461 --> 01:33:44,035
…as a charitable contribution.
–Harold.
1322
01:33:44,197 --> 01:33:49,499
No, no, no. In fact it amounts to more
than what you're currently withholding.
1323
01:33:49,702 --> 01:33:51,946
And it doesn't break any tax laws.
1324
01:33:52,071 --> 01:33:56,269
Harold, the point
is to break the tax laws.
1325
01:33:56,476 --> 01:33:59,843
I wanna make the world
a better place too, Ana.
1326
01:34:00,814 --> 01:34:03,977
I think that means
keeping you out of jail.
1327
01:34:07,954 --> 01:34:09,444
Okay.
1328
01:34:10,123 --> 01:34:11,613
Okay?
1329
01:34:11,825 --> 01:34:13,292
–Yeah.
–Okay.
1330
01:34:13,493 --> 01:34:17,156
If you come over here…
1331
01:34:17,363 --> 01:34:21,561
…and talk a little more tax talk
in my ear.
1332
01:34:21,768 --> 01:34:24,100
Because I like it so much.
1333
01:35:47,053 --> 01:35:50,947
Much had changed for Harold
over the past few weeks:
1334
01:35:50,990 --> 01:35:53,119
His attitude towards work.
1335
01:35:53,159 --> 01:35:55,491
His habitual counting.
1336
01:35:55,795 --> 01:35:57,558
His love life.
1337
01:36:01,734 --> 01:36:05,265
But of all the transmutations
Harold Crick had undergone…
1338
01:36:05,305 --> 01:36:10,299
…perhaps the most significant
was that today on his return to work…
1339
01:36:10,510 --> 01:36:14,947
…he was not late
for the 8:17 Kronecker bus.
1340
01:36:17,617 --> 01:36:19,479
What Harold had not understood…
1341
01:36:19,519 --> 01:36:22,081
…about that Wednesday
four weeks prior…
1342
01:36:22,121 --> 01:36:25,051
…was that the time he received from
his fellow commuter…
1343
01:36:25,091 --> 01:36:28,988
…was, in fact, three full minutes
later than the actual time…
1344
01:36:29,028 --> 01:36:31,491
…and, therefore, three
full minutes later…
1345
01:36:31,531 --> 01:36:36,415
…than the time to which his watch
and life had been previously set.
1346
01:36:37,303 --> 01:36:39,669
Not the worst of errors.
1347
01:36:41,040 --> 01:36:44,537
But if Harold had not set his watch
to the incorrect time…
1348
01:36:44,577 --> 01:36:48,741
…Harold would have again barely
caught the 8:17 Kronecker bus.
1349
01:36:48,781 --> 01:36:51,077
And he would not be approaching
the bus stop…
1350
01:36:51,117 --> 01:36:54,351
…precisely at 8:14
this particular Friday.
1351
01:36:54,520 --> 01:36:55,987
Excuse me.
1352
01:37:00,026 --> 01:37:01,653
Harold?
1353
01:37:03,096 --> 01:37:05,406
An otherwise ignorable fact…
1354
01:37:05,765 --> 01:37:08,339
…until the unthinkable occurred.
1355
01:37:41,200 --> 01:37:43,464
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
1356
01:37:43,670 --> 01:37:45,531
I need for everyone
to just stay seated.
1357
01:37:45,571 --> 01:37:47,095
Come on, son.
1358
01:37:52,245 --> 01:37:55,008
–What happened? I didn't see him.
–It was not your fault.
1359
01:37:55,048 --> 01:37:57,510
He was trying to help the boy.
Get your supervisor.
1360
01:37:57,550 --> 01:37:58,936
I don't believe this.
1361
01:37:58,951 --> 01:38:01,614
–It was all my fault, though.
–No, it wasn't.
1362
01:38:01,654 --> 01:38:02,848
Is he okay?
1363
01:38:03,056 --> 01:38:06,052
–It looks likes he's breathing.
–I don't think he's breathing.
1364
01:38:06,092 --> 01:38:07,389
Oh, my God.
1365
01:38:22,342 --> 01:38:23,502
Come in.
1366
01:38:27,214 --> 01:38:28,272
Excuse me.
1367
01:38:32,052 --> 01:38:34,282
Are you Professor Hilbert?
1368
01:38:35,989 --> 01:38:37,422
Yes.
1369
01:38:39,660 --> 01:38:42,151
Hi. I'm Karen Eiffel.
1370
01:38:42,963 --> 01:38:47,366
I believe we have
a mutual acquaintance.
1371
01:38:48,836 --> 01:38:51,031
Please, sit down.
1372
01:38:51,972 --> 01:38:54,497
No, I just came by to…
1373
01:38:55,576 --> 01:38:56,941
Here.
1374
01:39:00,314 --> 01:39:03,181
–Is that it?
–Yes.
1375
01:39:04,051 --> 01:39:05,746
Have you read it?
1376
01:39:07,387 --> 01:39:09,082
Is that all right?
1377
01:39:12,593 --> 01:39:14,117
Yes.
1378
01:39:16,663 --> 01:39:21,600
I think, perhaps, you may be
interested in the new ending.
1379
01:39:34,114 --> 01:39:35,979
Good afternoon.
1380
01:39:36,917 --> 01:39:38,646
Oh, hi.
1381
01:39:39,286 --> 01:39:41,584
It's a pretty brave thing you did.
1382
01:39:44,658 --> 01:39:47,760
Stepping in front of that bus
was pretty brave.
1383
01:39:49,296 --> 01:39:51,958
Kind of stupid, but pretty brave.
1384
01:39:52,166 --> 01:39:53,895
Oh, yeah.
1385
01:39:54,835 --> 01:39:56,462
Is that boy okay?
1386
01:39:56,670 --> 01:39:59,046
He's just fine. Scratched up is all.
1387
01:39:59,106 --> 01:40:00,733
Oh, good.
1388
01:40:03,210 --> 01:40:04,734
Am I okay?
1389
01:40:05,679 --> 01:40:07,544
Well, you're not dead.
1390
01:40:07,748 --> 01:40:10,711
On the other hand, it looks like
you cracked your head…
1391
01:40:10,751 --> 01:40:13,113
…you broke three bones
in your leg and foot…
1392
01:40:13,153 --> 01:40:16,016
…you suffered four broken ribs,
fractured your left arm…
1393
01:40:16,056 --> 01:40:20,120
…and severed an artery in your right,
which should've killed you in minutes.
1394
01:40:20,160 --> 01:40:21,354
But amazingly…
1395
01:40:21,562 --> 01:40:24,458
…a shard of metal from your watch
obstructed the artery…
1396
01:40:24,498 --> 01:40:27,594
…keeping the blood loss
low enough to keep you alive…
1397
01:40:27,634 --> 01:40:29,101
…which is pretty cool.
1398
01:40:30,437 --> 01:40:32,813
Yeah.
So with some physical therapy…
1399
01:40:32,906 --> 01:40:35,678
…a few months of rest,
you should be fine.
1400
01:40:35,976 --> 01:40:39,273
Well, sort of. We weren't able
to remove the shard of watch…
1401
01:40:39,313 --> 01:40:42,376
…from your arm without risking
severe arterial damage.
1402
01:40:42,416 --> 01:40:44,878
You'll be okay.
You'll just have a piece of watch…
1403
01:40:44,918 --> 01:40:47,781
…embedded in your arm
the rest of your life.
1404
01:40:47,821 --> 01:40:50,654
You're very lucky to be alive,
Mr Crick.
1405
01:40:51,592 --> 01:40:52,559
Yeah.
1406
01:40:56,797 --> 01:41:00,164
–Dr Mercator, Mr Crick has a visitor.
–Sure.
1407
01:41:01,201 --> 01:41:04,728
–My God, Harold.
–Hey.
1408
01:41:07,441 --> 01:41:10,205
–I'm okay. It's all right.
–Harold.
1409
01:41:10,410 --> 01:41:11,900
I'm fine.
1410
01:41:12,112 --> 01:41:14,706
Harold, you're not fine.
1411
01:41:14,915 --> 01:41:18,316
Look at you. You're severely injured.
1412
01:41:18,518 --> 01:41:21,487
–No, I'm fine.
–What…? What happened?
1413
01:41:22,656 --> 01:41:24,451
I stepped in front of a bus.
1414
01:41:24,491 --> 01:41:27,289
What? Why?
1415
01:41:27,494 --> 01:41:31,123
There was a boy.
I had to push him out of the way.
1416
01:41:31,331 --> 01:41:33,390
What?
1417
01:41:34,301 --> 01:41:37,532
I had to keep this boy from getting hit.
1418
01:41:40,941 --> 01:41:44,307
You stepped in front of a bus
to save a little boy?
1419
01:41:44,945 --> 01:41:47,038
I didn't have a choice.
1420
01:41:47,247 --> 01:41:48,874
I had to.
1421
01:42:03,330 --> 01:42:06,424
It's… It's okay.
1422
01:42:07,734 --> 01:42:10,430
–It's not great.
–No.
1423
01:42:10,637 --> 01:42:13,071
It's okay. It's not bad.
1424
01:42:13,507 --> 01:42:17,004
It's not the most amazing piece
of English literature in several years…
1425
01:42:17,044 --> 01:42:19,376
…but it's okay.
1426
01:42:21,448 --> 01:42:22,415
You know…
1427
01:42:24,885 --> 01:42:27,183
…I think I'm fine with “okay.”
1428
01:42:27,387 --> 01:42:30,083
It doesn't make sense
with the rest of the book though.
1429
01:42:30,123 --> 01:42:32,717
No, not yet. I'll rewrite the rest.
1430
01:42:32,926 --> 01:42:35,422
My assistant said
she'd go back to the publisher…
1431
01:42:35,462 --> 01:42:37,987
…and request more time.
–Why?
1432
01:42:38,432 --> 01:42:40,260
Don't know. It's awfully sweet though.
1433
01:42:40,300 --> 01:42:42,768
No, why did you change the book?
1434
01:42:45,205 --> 01:42:46,729
Lots of reasons.
1435
01:42:46,940 --> 01:42:49,670
I realized I just couldn't do it.
1436
01:42:50,978 --> 01:42:52,946
Because he's real?
1437
01:42:53,480 --> 01:42:56,244
Because it's a book about a man…
1438
01:42:56,450 --> 01:42:59,613
…who doesn't know he's about to die
and then dies.
1439
01:42:59,653 --> 01:43:03,547
But if the man does know
he's going to die and dies anyway…
1440
01:43:03,557 --> 01:43:06,725
…dies willingly,
knowing he could stop it, then…
1441
01:43:07,828 --> 01:43:11,821
I mean, isn't that the type of man
you want to keep alive?
1442
01:43:14,167 --> 01:43:17,164
As Harold took a bite
of Bavarian sugar cookie…
1443
01:43:17,204 --> 01:43:21,296
…he finally felt as if everything
was going to be okay.
1444
01:43:22,209 --> 01:43:25,939
Sometimes, when we lose ourselves
in fear and despair…
1445
01:43:25,979 --> 01:43:28,379
…in routine and constancy…
1446
01:43:29,483 --> 01:43:31,859
…in hopelessness and tragedy…
1447
01:43:32,252 --> 01:43:35,813
…we can thank God
for Bavarian sugar cookies.
1448
01:43:36,556 --> 01:43:39,453
And fortunately,
when there aren't any cookies…
1449
01:43:39,493 --> 01:43:44,226
…we can still find reassurance
in a familiar hand on our skin…
1450
01:43:45,565 --> 01:43:48,007
…or a kind and loving gesture…
1451
01:43:51,371 --> 01:43:53,615
…or a subtle encouragement…
1452
01:43:57,144 --> 01:43:59,476
…or a loving embrace…
1453
01:44:01,748 --> 01:44:04,581
…or an offer of comfort.
1454
01:44:05,352 --> 01:44:09,083
Not to mention hospital gurneys…
1455
01:44:11,058 --> 01:44:13,185
…and nose plugs…
1456
01:44:19,900 --> 01:44:22,266
…and uneaten Danish…
1457
01:44:24,371 --> 01:44:26,498
…and soft-spoken secrets…
1458
01:44:30,410 --> 01:44:33,243
…and Fender Stratocasters…
1459
01:44:33,914 --> 01:44:38,578
…and maybe the occasional piece
of fiction.
1460
01:44:39,686 --> 01:44:42,149
And we must remember
that all these things…
1461
01:44:42,189 --> 01:44:44,518
…the nuances, the anomalies,
the subtleties…
1462
01:44:44,558 --> 01:44:46,787
…which we assume
only accessorize our days…
1463
01:44:46,827 --> 01:44:51,161
…are, in fact, here for a much larger
and nobler cause:
1464
01:44:51,466 --> 01:44:54,663
They are here to save our lives.
1465
01:44:55,303 --> 01:44:57,897
I know the idea seems strange.
1466
01:44:58,106 --> 01:45:01,934
But I also know that it
just so happens to be true.
1467
01:45:02,710 --> 01:45:04,143
And so it was:
1468
01:45:04,345 --> 01:45:06,919
a wristwatch saved Harold Crick.
108970
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