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[theme music]
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ANNOUNCER: "The Dick Van Dyke Show,"
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starring Dick Van Dyke, Rose Marie, Morey Amsterdam, Larry
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Matthews, and Mary Tyler Moore.
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Why in the heck can't I draw horses?
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[laughs]
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Oh, boy.
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Maybe I can get it before it dries.
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Oh, boy.
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I wonder if that pen's--
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indelible laundry marking ink.
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That won't help.
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Ink eradicator, ink eradicator, where's the ink eradicator?
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Oh, boy, I hope this'll work.
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This oughta do it.
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Ah, yeah.
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It'll dry lighter.
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Oh, boy.
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Maybe there's some more paint in the garage.
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Oh, I hope so.
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Daddy!
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Daddy!
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Ritchie, have you seen daddy?
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Ritchie!
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I didn't do it.
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Well if you didn't, young man, then who did?
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Maybe daddy did.
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Richard R. Petrie, it is one thing to do something naughty,
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but then to put the blame on someone
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else, and your own father.
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That I will not tolerate.
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I am very angry with you, Ritchie, now go to your room.
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But mommy, I didn't do it.
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Go to your room.
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I didn't do it.
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Your father will deal with you later.
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I'll deal with him now.
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Honey, apologize to the boy.
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But he just--
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I just.
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You just?
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I just.
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And I--
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That's unjust.
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Honey, I did it with my little laundry marking pen.
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Oh, Ritchie, darling, come here.
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Mommy's sorry, sweetheart.
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Look, how about a box of cookies?
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The whole box?
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Yep.
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Just for being innocent?
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Oh, boy.
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Well, thank goodness we have a forgiving child.
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He takes after his mommy.
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You want me to forgive you?
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Well, I would like you to forgive me, rather
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than have a lot of screaming.
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Robert, how did you manage to mess my beautiful wall?
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Honey, 95% of the beautiful wall
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is still beautiful and clean.
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Now I'm gonna have to have the whole room repainted,
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and we just had it done.
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You're gonna do the whole wall for one little spot?
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Well, of course, there's no other way.
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Honey, that's like washing a whole shirt because the collar
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and cuffs are dirty.
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Rob, we do that.
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You do that, you're not gonna throw
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a whole room in the washing machine or something are you?
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No.
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Well, you just help me move this furniture
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and I'm gonna just repaint the collar and the cuffs,
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that's all.
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Don't say anything sweetheart, I'll paint your face.
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All right.
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Do we have any more of this paint?
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Can we get any more of this paint?
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The painter mixed it specially.
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Any more bright ideas?
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Yeah, I have.
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I have got a bright idea and I'd like
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to see you pooh-pooh this one.
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What is it?
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We call a painter and let him do it, huh?
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Brilliant.
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And I didn't have faith in you.
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What was the painter's name, honey, Mullen?
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Mm-hmm, but you won't get him, darling.
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Millie tried to get him last week,
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and he's going to be busy for a month and a half.
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Oh, boy.
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Were you here when that cute little
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Italian guy came by looking for work wallpapering and painting?
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Yes, I was.
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Well, he left a card, did you keep it?
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Of course.
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You know I'm a card saver.
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You save the nuttiest things, paper, cards, string.
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What do you want me to save?
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Why don't you try money.
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Give me some of them.
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There you go.
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Fertilizer, insurance, fertilizer--
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Insurance, veterinarian.
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Fertilizer, fertilizer.
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Plumber, veterinarian.
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We attract a lot of fertilizer salesmen.
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Let's see, retail store.
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Fabrics, contractor--
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Piano tuner.
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LAURA: --upholstery, tailors.
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Go directly to jail.
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Do not collect $200.
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Insurance.
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Tree surgery, insurance.
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- Real estate. - Here it is, I found it, honey,
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Beauty salon, leather goods--
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You can stop, I got it.
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--carpets, car rental.
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Who can stop?
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I'm all wound up.
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Welding, insurance, antiques.
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OK, here it is, Vito Giotto, master painter,
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Rome, Florence, Brooklyn.
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Are you sure this is the man?
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Yeah, I remember laughing at that, "Give me your walls."
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How do we know he's any good?
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Well, he's got a sense of humor.
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You know, how bad can he be?
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Well, you've got a sense of humor, darling,
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and I wouldn't recommend you to paint fences.
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I'll paint your face.
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Hello, is Mr. Vito Giotto there, please?
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[doorbell rings]
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I got it, honey.
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- Mr. Petrie? - Yeah.
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Vito Giotto.
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Oh, yeah, won't you come in?
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Yes, thank you very much.
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Honey, Mr. Giotto is here.
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Who?
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Oh, Signor Giotto.
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How do you do?
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Always I do well because I do only what pleases me.
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Well, this is the room we want it done.
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Ah, yes, it's very lovely, very lovely.
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[speaking italian]
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Mamma mia!
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How long this will have been sick?
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Only-- only-- oh, only since this afternoon.
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Ah, good, we can still save it.
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Everything is gonna be all right.
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Oh, excuse me, I disturb you.
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You were gonna have a cup of coffee, eh?
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- Oh, no. - Oh, that's all right.
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Oh no, it's not all right.
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No, I feel bad.
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See, Signor, you have a cup of coffee, eh?
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I examine the wall.
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Please, Signor, please.
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I-- please.
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Thank you.
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You got the sugar and the coffee all right?
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- Yes. - Very good, all right.
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(SINGING) Cha, cha, cha.
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Hmm.
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Mr. and Mrs. Petrie, I got to tell you something.
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You got the most beautiful, the most beautiful walls.
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Mm!
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Thank you.
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No, no, no, I thank you.
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In fact, I would consider it an honor--
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not an honor, a privilege if you would
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allow the brusher Vito Giotto to caress these magnificent walls.
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Please, give me your walls.
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Well, take 'em.
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Signor Giotto?
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Si, Signora.
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Would you like a cup of coffee?
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You are very kind, thank you.
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Rob, would you help me get the cup.
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Oh, yeah, yeah, honey.
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I'll, uh-- Sit down, Mr. Giotto.
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Honey, what do you want?
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You gave him the job.
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Well, he seems to know what he's doing.
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And he loves our walls.
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Did you see the way he's caressing those walls?
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I saw.
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I think he's a nut.
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Van Gogh was a nut, he did pretty good work.
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Rob, he didn't say anything about how
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much the job will cost.
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Well, honey, how much is he gonna charge us for one room.
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That's exactly the question you should have asked him.
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Well, he doesn't look like the kind of a guy who's
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gonna take advantage of us.
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Not that cup, darling, it's chipped.
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Rob, did you notice how he's dressed?
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Well, what's that got to do with anything?
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Those are very expensive looking clothes he has on.
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Where did he get the money for those clothes?
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Over-charging?
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That'd be my guess.
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Rob, I think we ought to get an estimate.
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You want me to ask him how much he's gonna charge?
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No, I think I'd better do it.
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Why, you think I'm not capable of saying,
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"how much is that, sir?"
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Oh, very.
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You're just not capable of saying, "I'm sorry, sir,
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I think that's too much."
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What do you take me for?
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A man who can be taken.
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Darling, you are very squeamish when it comes to money matters.
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You're a pushover for a good sales pitch.
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I suppose you think you can do it better.
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I know I can.
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Or don't you remember what we almost paid for this house?
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Yeah, you go ahead and take over.
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Signor Petrie, excuse my inquisitive,
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but what do you use on this wall to make
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this very original splotch?
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Ink eradicator.
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That's very creative.
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Signor Giotto.
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Call me Vito.
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Vito, do you look for this to be a very big job?
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Big job?
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Well, you see, we're having a dinner party soon.
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- When? - Uh, three days.
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Uh, two weeks.
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Two weeks and three days.
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That gives me plenty of time to finish the job.
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And how much do you think it will all cost?
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You mean how much I'm going to charge
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you to paint the whole room?
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Yes, how much?
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Same color?
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Yes.
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The whole walls and the ceiling too?
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Yes.
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Everything?
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I see, and the bricks--
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No, don't touch the bricks.
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No, I won't touch the bricks.
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You tell me don't touch the bricks,
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I won't touch the bricks!
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I figure out in a minute what [inaudible]
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It's this one wall here.
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No touch the bricks.
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That's all right.
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It's one or two or three window.
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The boo-boo is gonna have two coats, huh?
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Well, I would say that it would cost you
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not too much, not too little.
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An amount that will satisfy both the patron and the artist.
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I see, but couldn't you give us a--
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You want the price now?
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Well, at least an estimate.
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Signora, I want you to have a little trust in me
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because Vito Giotto never cheated anyone before
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and I don't think I'm going to start
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to cheat now for one so lovely, so
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beautiful, so charming as you.
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You want me to start tomorrow morning?
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Yes, that would be--
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Rob, would that be all right?
269
00:12:19,038 --> 00:12:22,041
Oh, fine, fine with me, honey, fine.
270
00:12:22,141 --> 00:12:23,342
Would you like some coffee, Vito?
271
00:12:23,442 --> 00:12:24,977
Uh, thank you very much, but I have to go.
272
00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:26,545
I have to start the work tomorrow
273
00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:29,815
morning at a very important job, oh so very important, yes.
274
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:34,687
I'm going to work for a very lovely young couple.
275
00:12:34,787 --> 00:12:36,155
And I'll see you tomorrow morning, yeah?
276
00:12:36,255 --> 00:12:37,156
Arrivederci.
277
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:41,894
Oh, wall, everything's gonna be fine!
278
00:12:51,237 --> 00:12:53,539
Well, what would you have done?
279
00:12:53,639 --> 00:12:55,474
Well, I'll tell you one thing, he could have stood here
280
00:12:55,574 --> 00:12:57,977
and kissed my hand from today 'til tomorrow and I would have
281
00:12:58,077 --> 00:12:59,678
still got a price in writing.
282
00:12:59,778 --> 00:13:00,813
That's what I would have done.
283
00:13:00,913 --> 00:13:02,348
You think he's gonna take us?
284
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:03,382
I don't know, honey.
285
00:13:03,482 --> 00:13:04,950
But I want you to remember something,
286
00:13:05,050 --> 00:13:07,920
I wear the pants in the family.
287
00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:11,157
Well, I'll wear the important pants of the family.
288
00:13:11,257 --> 00:13:14,059
I wear the family leadership, decision making pants.
289
00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:15,828
Now, will you try to remember that from now on?
290
00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:17,463
Yes, darling.
291
00:13:17,563 --> 00:13:20,499
[knocking]
292
00:13:26,172 --> 00:13:28,974
Knocking on doors at 5 o'clock in the morning.
293
00:13:31,710 --> 00:13:33,879
I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming.
294
00:13:41,820 --> 00:13:43,956
Buongiorno, signor, buongiorno.
295
00:13:44,056 --> 00:13:45,457
Good morning.
296
00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:46,692
What time is it?
297
00:13:46,792 --> 00:13:49,395
It's 5:30.
298
00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:50,763
5:30 in the morning?
299
00:13:50,863 --> 00:13:52,298
Oh, yes, yes.
300
00:13:52,398 --> 00:13:56,669
That's when most artists are the most creative.
301
00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:57,903
- What are you gonna do? - Huh?
302
00:13:58,003 --> 00:13:59,038
What are you gonna do?
303
00:13:59,138 --> 00:14:00,272
Oh, I'm gonna prepare the wall.
304
00:14:00,372 --> 00:14:01,574
See, I'm gonna put the furniture right
305
00:14:01,674 --> 00:14:02,474
in the middle of the room.
306
00:14:02,575 --> 00:14:03,876
Then I'm gonna-- then--
307
00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:09,114
You're not up yet.
308
00:14:09,215 --> 00:14:10,583
But I think you better go back to bed,
309
00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:11,550
and then I talk to you after.
310
00:14:11,650 --> 00:14:12,484
OK?
311
00:14:12,585 --> 00:14:13,886
All right?
312
00:14:13,986 --> 00:14:16,255
And I promise you I'm gonna be quiet like a rat.
313
00:14:20,292 --> 00:14:22,261
Rats at 5:30 in the morning.
314
00:14:30,869 --> 00:14:32,471
Where's the master?
315
00:14:32,571 --> 00:14:33,706
Well, I don't know.
316
00:14:33,806 --> 00:14:35,207
He said he was gonna be quiet as a rat,
317
00:14:35,307 --> 00:14:38,010
maybe he's in the wall someplace.
318
00:14:38,110 --> 00:14:39,478
Well, he certainly didn't get much
319
00:14:39,578 --> 00:14:41,747
done in three hours, did he?
320
00:14:41,847 --> 00:14:42,781
Mom?
321
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:45,584
Why didn't you get references?
322
00:14:45,684 --> 00:14:48,087
Why didn't you get an estimate?
323
00:14:48,187 --> 00:14:49,521
Let's have some breakfast.
324
00:14:49,622 --> 00:14:50,623
All right.
325
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,157
I wonder where he's hiding?
326
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,997
Somebody has been cooking in my kitchen.
327
00:14:58,097 --> 00:15:01,166
Somebody has been sitting in my chair.
328
00:15:01,267 --> 00:15:03,202
And somebody's been drinking out of my cup.
329
00:15:03,302 --> 00:15:06,472
Well, Signor Giotto certainly feels right at home here,
330
00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:07,439
doesn't he?
331
00:15:07,539 --> 00:15:10,109
French toast, link sausage, coffee.
332
00:15:12,611 --> 00:15:15,347
Honey, I'm gonna have a little talk with our master painter.
333
00:15:15,447 --> 00:15:19,051
I'd rather live with a splotch on the wall than be taken.
334
00:15:19,151 --> 00:15:21,754
[vocalizing]
335
00:15:21,854 --> 00:15:23,889
Oh, buongiorno, signor.
336
00:15:23,989 --> 00:15:24,990
Signora, buongiorno. - Good morning.
337
00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:26,525
Good morning.
338
00:15:26,625 --> 00:15:29,128
I hope you're not mad at me for messing up your kitchen,
339
00:15:29,228 --> 00:15:30,396
huh?
340
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:33,365
Mommy, Vito makes better French toast than you do.
341
00:15:33,465 --> 00:15:36,602
No, that's not true, no, only that it's a little different,
342
00:15:36,702 --> 00:15:38,003
that's all.
343
00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,972
You gotta remember this, Ritchie, and never forget,
344
00:15:40,072 --> 00:15:44,310
nobody, not nobody is a cook like a mama.
345
00:15:44,410 --> 00:15:46,111
You do!
346
00:15:46,211 --> 00:15:48,080
Did you cook breakfast for Ritchie?
347
00:15:48,180 --> 00:15:50,115
Yes, Mr. Petrie, you see, at 7 o'clock this morning,
348
00:15:50,215 --> 00:15:53,919
the boy come and he say I'm hungry, I'm gonna wake up mama.
349
00:15:54,019 --> 00:15:56,221
And I said no, Ritchie, no.
350
00:15:56,322 --> 00:15:58,057
I tell you this and never forget,
351
00:15:58,157 --> 00:16:02,528
you never wake up mama, especially when she's sleeping.
352
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,366
So Vito make the breakfast.
353
00:16:07,466 --> 00:16:09,034
Excuse me.
354
00:16:09,134 --> 00:16:11,804
And after he did some magic tricks.
355
00:16:11,904 --> 00:16:13,439
He can make a bird disappear.
356
00:16:13,539 --> 00:16:14,740
Show 'em, Vito.
357
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:15,641
No, no, no.
358
00:16:15,741 --> 00:16:17,042
Not now.
359
00:16:17,142 --> 00:16:19,778
But I would like to make for you some French toast,
360
00:16:19,878 --> 00:16:21,347
Italian style, eh?
361
00:16:21,447 --> 00:16:23,482
No garlic.
362
00:16:23,582 --> 00:16:26,852
Garlic in-- [laughs].
363
00:16:26,952 --> 00:16:28,554
Garlic in the French toast!
364
00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:31,623
Whoever heard of the garlic in the French toast!
365
00:16:31,724 --> 00:16:34,593
In coffee, yes.
366
00:16:34,693 --> 00:16:36,061
I fool you.
367
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:38,063
Ha ha, yeah, I fool you.
368
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:40,866
You know, the whole secret is two dash of vanilla
369
00:16:40,966 --> 00:16:43,435
extract inside, that's all.
370
00:16:43,535 --> 00:16:44,470
May I?
371
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:46,171
Well, I guess so.
372
00:16:46,271 --> 00:16:48,807
Everybody outside of my kitchen, please, outside.
373
00:16:55,047 --> 00:16:57,616
I'll just check on Ritchie.
374
00:16:57,716 --> 00:16:59,051
Five days, five days.
375
00:16:59,151 --> 00:17:00,586
You know something, this is getting to be madness.
376
00:17:00,686 --> 00:17:04,323
He hasn't put the first coat on this room yet.
377
00:17:04,423 --> 00:17:07,526
Rob, why didn't you talk to him about it this afternoon?
378
00:17:07,626 --> 00:17:08,627
Honey, I was going to.
379
00:17:08,727 --> 00:17:09,962
He said he was going to work late tonight,
380
00:17:10,062 --> 00:17:11,397
he sneaked out on me.
381
00:17:11,497 --> 00:17:13,031
I'll talk to him in the morning if I get the chance.
382
00:17:13,132 --> 00:17:14,133
He's a very busy man.
383
00:17:14,233 --> 00:17:15,567
Yeah, he's busy.
384
00:17:15,667 --> 00:17:17,736
He's busy painting Ritchie's room and the basement,
385
00:17:17,836 --> 00:17:19,271
every room but this.
386
00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:21,774
Boy, why you let him paint those rooms, I'll never know.
387
00:17:21,874 --> 00:17:23,342
Let him? Who let him?
388
00:17:23,442 --> 00:17:26,779
He'd be gone now if you hadn't let him do all that cooking.
389
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:27,946
I've got to get him out of here.
390
00:17:28,046 --> 00:17:29,548
I've got to get him out of here.
391
00:17:34,086 --> 00:17:35,888
Why did you let him paint those rooms?
392
00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:37,055
Honey, don't turn out the light.
393
00:17:37,156 --> 00:17:38,891
I don't want to find the TV listings.
394
00:17:38,991 --> 00:17:40,392
Well, you heard him, he said Ritchie
395
00:17:40,492 --> 00:17:42,428
wanted to learn to paint so he painted Ritchie's room.
396
00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:44,463
Well, they didn't need repainting.
397
00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:45,998
Five days, I could have bought a roller
398
00:17:46,098 --> 00:17:47,666
and done this over the weekend myself.
399
00:17:47,766 --> 00:17:49,001
He must take us for fools.
400
00:17:49,101 --> 00:17:51,570
He's also taking us for a lot of money.
401
00:17:51,670 --> 00:17:52,905
Yeah, that's right.
402
00:17:53,005 --> 00:17:54,106
He's also moving in, honey.
403
00:17:54,206 --> 00:17:55,441
You gave him your kitchen.
404
00:17:55,541 --> 00:17:57,342
Well, you gave him the key to the front door.
405
00:17:57,443 --> 00:17:59,678
I don't want to get up at 5:30 every morning
406
00:17:59,778 --> 00:18:01,146
and open the door for him.
407
00:18:01,246 --> 00:18:02,681
Honey, we're stuck. You know what it is?
408
00:18:02,781 --> 00:18:04,183
It's squatters rights.
409
00:18:04,283 --> 00:18:06,318
He's painted Ritchie's room, he's painted the basement,
410
00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:08,687
we now have to give him whatever he asks.
411
00:18:08,787 --> 00:18:09,688
Here it is.
412
00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:13,425
Rob, you know what I wish you'd do?
413
00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:14,159
What?
414
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:16,829
Something, anything.
415
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:17,763
I'll do something.
416
00:18:17,863 --> 00:18:19,064
I'll do something.
417
00:18:19,164 --> 00:18:20,499
I'll get that Neapolitan da Vinci out of here
418
00:18:20,599 --> 00:18:22,634
by tomorrow night if I have to throw him out bodily.
419
00:18:22,734 --> 00:18:23,869
Good.
420
00:18:23,969 --> 00:18:25,704
Stay in this mood and catch him when he comes in.
421
00:18:25,804 --> 00:18:27,873
I can't.
422
00:18:27,973 --> 00:18:29,408
Why not?
423
00:18:29,508 --> 00:18:33,011
Well, he keeps telling me I'm the nicest man he ever met.
424
00:18:33,111 --> 00:18:35,547
I know, he tells me that too.
425
00:18:35,647 --> 00:18:38,317
He told me that I looked like a young priest that hid him
426
00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:39,852
out in the basement during the war
427
00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:42,154
when the Nazis were after him.
428
00:18:42,254 --> 00:18:43,422
Do you believe him?
429
00:18:43,522 --> 00:18:45,090
I don't know, but he's got me buffaloed.
430
00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:47,025
Darn it, how can you kick a guy out that
431
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:50,028
says you look like a priest?
432
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:51,463
You mean you're not going to get rid of him?
433
00:18:51,563 --> 00:18:52,865
I'm going to get rid of him.
434
00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:54,600
Oh, Rob, you'll never do it.
435
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:55,767
I will do it.
436
00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:56,702
You hold me to it.
437
00:18:56,802 --> 00:18:58,036
If I don't do it--
438
00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,172
you make me-- I'll promise I'll sleep right on this couch
439
00:19:00,272 --> 00:19:02,741
for the next three months.
440
00:19:02,841 --> 00:19:03,909
You get him out of here.
441
00:19:28,033 --> 00:19:31,203
VITO: Angelou, it's me, Vito.
442
00:19:31,303 --> 00:19:32,170
Imbecile!
443
00:19:32,271 --> 00:19:34,473
Your brother.
444
00:19:34,573 --> 00:19:37,776
You bring 10 gallons of flat eggshell white paint.
445
00:19:41,313 --> 00:19:42,281
Take your time, honey.
446
00:19:42,381 --> 00:19:44,816
I'll put the coff--
447
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:45,817
Hi, daddy.
448
00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:49,154
Can I have my break--
449
00:19:49,254 --> 00:19:50,556
Darling, what were you saying?
450
00:19:53,258 --> 00:19:54,293
It's all done.
451
00:19:54,393 --> 00:19:55,827
Beautifully, too.
452
00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:59,298
Does that mean that Vito won't be coming back any more?
453
00:19:59,398 --> 00:20:00,933
Well, I guess so, Rich.
454
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:03,201
Ah, that's a gyp.
455
00:20:03,302 --> 00:20:04,770
Where are you going, dear?
456
00:20:04,870 --> 00:20:06,171
I'm gonna go tell Freddy.
457
00:20:06,271 --> 00:20:07,506
He's gonna be mad.
458
00:20:10,108 --> 00:20:11,877
What do you know about this?
459
00:20:11,977 --> 00:20:13,378
Old Vito came through after all.
460
00:20:13,478 --> 00:20:15,247
And he did a good job, too.
461
00:20:15,347 --> 00:20:16,181
He sure did.
462
00:20:16,281 --> 00:20:17,516
It's beautiful.
463
00:20:17,616 --> 00:20:20,752
I wonder what he charges for all night painting.
464
00:20:20,852 --> 00:20:21,954
Probably double time.
465
00:20:22,054 --> 00:20:22,854
I wouldn't doubt it.
466
00:20:22,955 --> 00:20:23,989
[interposing voices]
467
00:20:24,089 --> 00:20:25,157
Good morning, Vito.
468
00:20:25,257 --> 00:20:26,358
- Oh, good morning. - Buongiorno.
469
00:20:26,458 --> 00:20:27,759
Mr. Petrie, this is the key, eh.
470
00:20:27,859 --> 00:20:29,428
Oh, thank you.
471
00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:31,964
You are very pleased with your new walls?
472
00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:33,899
Oh, they're gorgeous.
473
00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:35,133
Are they not?
474
00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:36,568
I want you to know that I painted them
475
00:20:36,668 --> 00:20:40,205
with love and with paint too.
476
00:20:40,305 --> 00:20:42,674
The most expensive paint that money can buy.
477
00:20:42,774 --> 00:20:44,142
Yeah, I'll bet.
478
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:45,744
How much do we owe you, Vito?
479
00:20:45,844 --> 00:20:47,980
You are completely satisfied with the job?
480
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:49,948
Well, it's a wonderful job.
481
00:20:50,048 --> 00:20:51,216
Good.
482
00:20:51,316 --> 00:20:54,853
Well, this is my price.
483
00:20:54,953 --> 00:20:55,921
What?
484
00:20:56,021 --> 00:20:57,856
I added incorrectly?
485
00:20:57,956 --> 00:20:59,324
Added incorrectly?
486
00:20:59,424 --> 00:21:02,261
Signor Giotto, this is ridiculous.
487
00:21:02,361 --> 00:21:03,595
I don't think so.
488
00:21:03,695 --> 00:21:06,798
Do you mean to tell me that $500 is your price?
489
00:21:06,898 --> 00:21:09,701
I am an artist and this is a Giotto original.
490
00:21:09,801 --> 00:21:12,371
You expect $500?
491
00:21:12,471 --> 00:21:14,506
That's my price.
492
00:21:14,606 --> 00:21:17,809
But this is what I expect.
493
00:21:17,909 --> 00:21:18,710
That?
494
00:21:18,810 --> 00:21:19,911
Oh, you're joking.
495
00:21:20,012 --> 00:21:21,513
You can't be serious.
496
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:23,282
Well, that couldn't cover any more than the paint
497
00:21:23,382 --> 00:21:25,250
and maybe one day's labor.
498
00:21:25,350 --> 00:21:26,818
That's true.
499
00:21:26,918 --> 00:21:29,655
I spent here five days, I know, but I got so much in return.
500
00:21:29,755 --> 00:21:32,424
Yes, five days, had the most happy talk
501
00:21:32,524 --> 00:21:33,892
with the most happy people.
502
00:21:33,992 --> 00:21:38,230
In five days, mamma mia, the most delicious food
503
00:21:38,330 --> 00:21:39,631
I've eaten in my life.
504
00:21:39,731 --> 00:21:42,200
You're very kind, but you did most of the cooking.
505
00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:43,435
Yes, I know.
506
00:21:46,772 --> 00:21:50,008
I bet that you think I stay here too long because I want to make
507
00:21:50,108 --> 00:21:51,243
it look like a big job, eh?
508
00:21:51,343 --> 00:21:52,177
Oh.
509
00:21:52,277 --> 00:21:53,111
Oh, no.
510
00:21:53,211 --> 00:21:54,513
Just a little bit?
511
00:21:54,613 --> 00:21:56,248
Just a little bit, yeah.
512
00:21:56,348 --> 00:21:57,683
Well, I want to tell you something,
513
00:21:57,783 --> 00:22:01,520
I stay here because I received so much in return.
514
00:22:01,620 --> 00:22:03,255
Well, this is the way I live.
515
00:22:03,355 --> 00:22:05,457
This is the way I do business.
516
00:22:05,557 --> 00:22:08,026
I bet you think I'm a little cuckoo, eh?
517
00:22:08,126 --> 00:22:09,394
No, not at all.
518
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:11,096
I think it's a wonderful way to do business.
519
00:22:11,196 --> 00:22:13,865
Not always I like to stay for five days in one room,
520
00:22:13,965 --> 00:22:15,500
oh no, in some house.
521
00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:17,903
I like to do five rooms in one day.
522
00:22:18,003 --> 00:22:19,338
That's pretty fast.
523
00:22:19,438 --> 00:22:20,505
You think that's fast?
524
00:22:20,605 --> 00:22:23,275
In Italy, I was working for Mussolini.
525
00:22:23,375 --> 00:22:27,713
The whole palace-- one hour.
526
00:22:27,813 --> 00:22:29,281
Well, listen how about Ritchie's room
527
00:22:29,381 --> 00:22:30,282
and the whole basement?
528
00:22:30,382 --> 00:22:31,717
I do that to teach the boy.
529
00:22:31,817 --> 00:22:33,618
Well, can't we pay you for your time?
530
00:22:33,719 --> 00:22:34,453
No, no.
531
00:22:34,553 --> 00:22:35,353
For the paint?
532
00:22:35,454 --> 00:22:37,723
Yes, yes.
533
00:22:37,823 --> 00:22:39,758
Well, thank you so much for your patience.
534
00:22:39,858 --> 00:22:40,992
And now I go.
535
00:22:41,093 --> 00:22:42,060
Arrivederci.
536
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:43,428
Well, wait a minute, Vito.
537
00:22:43,528 --> 00:22:44,896
Don't you want me to make out a check for you?
538
00:22:44,996 --> 00:22:46,264
Oh, no.
539
00:22:46,364 --> 00:22:47,966
No, you don't want to be paid?
540
00:22:48,066 --> 00:22:49,067
Yes, on Saturday.
541
00:22:49,167 --> 00:22:50,335
Oh, yes.
542
00:22:50,435 --> 00:22:51,837
You see, I promised Ritchie and the gang
543
00:22:51,937 --> 00:22:53,772
that I'm gonna come back and make a little magic show
544
00:22:53,872 --> 00:22:55,407
for them, you know? - Oh, good.
545
00:22:55,507 --> 00:22:56,842
Well, when you come back, Vito, would you
546
00:22:56,942 --> 00:22:59,378
mind touching up that black splotch over there
547
00:22:59,478 --> 00:23:01,012
on the baseboard.
548
00:23:01,113 --> 00:23:02,414
Oh no.
549
00:23:02,514 --> 00:23:08,520
I no touch your brick, and you no know my splotch.
550
00:23:08,620 --> 00:23:10,122
That's my signature.
551
00:23:17,896 --> 00:23:20,866
He did, he signed it, Vito Giotto.
552
00:23:37,582 --> 00:23:38,483
[laughter]
553
00:23:38,583 --> 00:23:39,684
CHILDREN: More!
554
00:23:39,785 --> 00:23:42,487
Do more!
555
00:23:42,587 --> 00:23:43,688
No more, no more for now.
556
00:23:43,789 --> 00:23:45,290
I will come back some other day.
557
00:23:45,390 --> 00:23:47,659
And I visit you and I promise to do more things, all right?
558
00:23:47,759 --> 00:23:49,995
And now I want you to go to the refrigerator
559
00:23:50,095 --> 00:23:52,864
and see what I bring for you, Italian spumoni.
560
00:23:56,935 --> 00:23:58,303
Ice cream.
561
00:23:58,403 --> 00:23:59,905
[cheering]
562
00:24:00,005 --> 00:24:02,674
[inaudible]
563
00:24:02,774 --> 00:24:04,476
Vito, thank you so much.
564
00:24:04,576 --> 00:24:05,744
We really enjoyed it.
565
00:24:05,844 --> 00:24:08,113
Not as much as I enjoy it, signora.
566
00:24:08,213 --> 00:24:09,614
Thank you so much for having me.
567
00:24:09,714 --> 00:24:11,683
Vito, if there's ever anything we can do for you.
568
00:24:11,783 --> 00:24:13,919
Now that you mention it, yes, there is one thing.
569
00:24:14,019 --> 00:24:15,153
What is it?
570
00:24:15,253 --> 00:24:17,856
I don't know how to say it, but if you would do it,
571
00:24:17,956 --> 00:24:21,059
I would think of you kindly always
572
00:24:21,159 --> 00:24:22,727
What is it?
573
00:24:22,828 --> 00:24:23,695
Pay me.
574
00:24:23,795 --> 00:24:26,231
Oh.
575
00:24:26,331 --> 00:24:28,099
There you are.
576
00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:29,000
You--
577
00:24:29,100 --> 00:24:29,935
[laughs]
578
00:24:30,035 --> 00:24:31,203
[music playing]
579
00:24:40,679 --> 00:24:44,583
[theme music]
39761
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