Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:10,243 --> 00:00:19,019
MAN: The Dick Van Dyke Show starring Dick Van Dyke,
2
00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:22,722
Rose Marie, Morey Amsterdam, Larry
3
00:00:22,822 --> 00:00:25,558
Matthews and Mary Tyler Moore.
4
00:00:29,195 --> 00:00:32,699
[music playing]
5
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:38,405
Boy, Buddy was sure in good form tonight, wasn't he?
6
00:00:45,412 --> 00:00:47,647
It's a little nippy out tonight.
7
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:52,819
Nippy in tonight.
8
00:01:01,361 --> 00:01:03,496
All right, what did I do?
9
00:01:03,596 --> 00:01:04,964
What did I do?
10
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:08,001
What you always do.
11
00:01:08,101 --> 00:01:09,769
Oh no.
12
00:01:09,869 --> 00:01:11,805
Don't tell me I'm going to have one of those arguments
13
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,339
where I have to guess what it is.
14
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:18,711
Oh, come on.
15
00:01:18,812 --> 00:01:19,646
That's not fair.
16
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:22,015
At least give me a hint.
17
00:01:22,115 --> 00:01:24,684
Was it something I did?
18
00:01:24,784 --> 00:01:25,752
Said?
19
00:01:25,852 --> 00:01:27,153
Didn't do? Didn't say?
20
00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:28,888
Shouldn't have said? Should have said?
21
00:01:28,988 --> 00:01:29,889
What?
22
00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:34,127
I don't mind playing games.
23
00:01:34,227 --> 00:01:35,462
I don't mind.
24
00:01:35,562 --> 00:01:37,764
But if I guess what it is that's bothering you,
25
00:01:37,864 --> 00:01:40,400
will you tell me?
26
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:41,734
All right.
27
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:44,671
Was it something I did before we left the house tonight?
28
00:01:47,173 --> 00:01:48,208
Well, that's not fair.
29
00:01:48,308 --> 00:01:49,476
You've got to help me a little bit.
30
00:01:49,576 --> 00:01:52,378
Even John Daly gives yes or no answers.
31
00:01:55,715 --> 00:01:56,349
After.
32
00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:58,551
Oh thank you, John.
33
00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:03,156
After, all right.
34
00:02:03,256 --> 00:02:04,324
Now we're getting somewhere.
35
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:07,894
Let's see, Could have been at dinner.
36
00:02:07,994 --> 00:02:10,096
Did I go wrong at dinner?
37
00:02:10,196 --> 00:02:11,898
No, no.
38
00:02:11,998 --> 00:02:13,366
You called me handsome at dinner,
39
00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:15,902
that means there was some degree of affection for me
40
00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:18,705
at that time.
41
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:19,739
The play.
42
00:02:19,839 --> 00:02:22,175
The play, it could have been the play.
43
00:02:22,275 --> 00:02:24,744
I picked it and you hated it.
44
00:02:24,844 --> 00:02:26,012
No, no, that's not right.
45
00:02:26,112 --> 00:02:27,247
You enjoyed the play.
46
00:02:27,347 --> 00:02:28,615
You cried through the whole third act.
47
00:02:31,150 --> 00:02:32,552
The restaurant?
48
00:02:32,652 --> 00:02:33,686
That's it.
49
00:02:33,786 --> 00:02:35,688
I did something dastardly in the restaurant.
50
00:02:35,788 --> 00:02:36,789
Is that it?
51
00:02:36,890 --> 00:02:38,958
You're not being at all amusing, darling.
52
00:02:39,058 --> 00:02:40,527
Hey, you called me darling.
53
00:02:40,627 --> 00:02:42,462
That means it's not too terrible.
54
00:02:42,562 --> 00:02:46,132
I think it's pretty terrible not to be able to send
55
00:02:46,232 --> 00:02:47,467
our son to college.
56
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:58,444
Oh honey, I give up.
57
00:02:58,545 --> 00:03:00,647
What could I possibly have done in the restaurant
58
00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:02,882
that our son couldn't go to college.
59
00:03:02,982 --> 00:03:04,584
You know what you did.
60
00:03:04,684 --> 00:03:05,385
You were there.
61
00:03:05,485 --> 00:03:06,553
You know exactly what it is.
62
00:03:06,653 --> 00:03:11,024
You just think about it for a minute.
63
00:03:11,124 --> 00:03:15,261
[music playing]
64
00:03:25,238 --> 00:03:26,839
You're not going to give me a hint.
65
00:03:29,809 --> 00:03:32,212
Was it in the restaurant that I did this terrible thing
66
00:03:32,312 --> 00:03:33,980
is going to keep our seven-year-old son out
67
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,014
of college?
68
00:03:39,018 --> 00:03:39,919
What did I do?
69
00:03:44,824 --> 00:03:48,561
Darling, see if you can't get a nice cozy romantic corner
70
00:03:48,661 --> 00:03:49,262
Right.
71
00:03:49,362 --> 00:03:50,763
Yes, sir?
72
00:03:50,863 --> 00:03:53,766
My wife and I would like a nice cozy romantic corner.
73
00:03:53,866 --> 00:03:55,034
I don't blame you.
74
00:03:55,134 --> 00:03:56,836
Follow me.
75
00:03:56,936 --> 00:03:59,672
Ah, here's a nice cozy table for two.
76
00:03:59,772 --> 00:04:02,208
Hey, how about a nice noisy table for six?
77
00:04:02,308 --> 00:04:03,843
Oh, Laura look who's here.
78
00:04:03,943 --> 00:04:05,078
Rob, Laura.
79
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:06,012
Come on over.
80
00:04:06,112 --> 00:04:07,046
No laughs at that table.
81
00:04:07,146 --> 00:04:08,348
Join the party.
82
00:04:08,448 --> 00:04:09,749
Yeah, come on over, we need some new blood.
83
00:04:09,849 --> 00:04:11,784
Buddy is down to reciting very adult limericks.
84
00:04:11,884 --> 00:04:13,319
Yeah, there was a young lady from--
85
00:04:13,419 --> 00:04:14,954
Oh, shut up.
86
00:04:15,054 --> 00:04:16,522
See what I mean? Come on over.
87
00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:17,256
Come on.
88
00:04:17,357 --> 00:04:18,191
Hey honey, shall we?
89
00:04:18,291 --> 00:04:19,325
Darling, I--
90
00:04:19,425 --> 00:04:20,260
They need us over there.
91
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,829
Well, all right.
92
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:25,465
I ruined your romantic evening by agreeing
93
00:04:25,565 --> 00:04:27,900
to sit with my friends, right?
94
00:04:28,001 --> 00:04:29,335
It can't be it.
95
00:04:29,435 --> 00:04:32,905
Wouldn't keep our son out of college.
96
00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:36,342
It's got to be something else.
97
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,878
I told you there was room for everybody.
98
00:04:38,978 --> 00:04:41,080
I thought we were going to be stuck with each other
99
00:04:41,180 --> 00:04:42,482
this evening.
100
00:04:42,582 --> 00:04:43,750
How are you, Pickles?
101
00:04:43,850 --> 00:04:47,420
Well, I had this pain over my left eye.
102
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:48,454
So I went to the doctor--
103
00:04:48,554 --> 00:04:49,422
Well, believe me it's nothing.
104
00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:50,723
She had a little headache.
105
00:04:50,823 --> 00:04:52,325
What do you mean I had a little headache?
106
00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:54,661
I had to take a whole aspirin.
107
00:04:54,761 --> 00:04:56,596
And a half a glass of water.
108
00:04:56,696 --> 00:04:58,564
Oh, this kid's had a rough day.
109
00:04:58,665 --> 00:04:59,666
Yeah.
110
00:04:59,766 --> 00:05:02,101
And it dissolved before I could swallow it.
111
00:05:02,201 --> 00:05:04,604
Laura, I don't think you'vea ever met Herman Glimscher.
112
00:05:04,704 --> 00:05:06,339
No but I've heard you speak of him.
113
00:05:06,439 --> 00:05:07,473
Well, forget what I told you.
114
00:05:07,573 --> 00:05:10,209
This is what he really looks like.
115
00:05:10,309 --> 00:05:11,811
Herman, this is Laura Petrie.
116
00:05:11,911 --> 00:05:12,745
Very nice to meet you.
117
00:05:12,845 --> 00:05:13,880
Likewise.
118
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,982
Laura's a very happily married woman.
119
00:05:16,082 --> 00:05:17,984
When are you going to make me one of those?
120
00:05:18,084 --> 00:05:19,552
Any time you say, Sally.
121
00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:21,387
Well, how about Thursday?
122
00:05:21,487 --> 00:05:23,156
I'm a little busy Friday, we're having fish.
123
00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:24,891
Enough of this stuff.
124
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:26,392
How about a little dessert, maybe coffee?
125
00:05:26,492 --> 00:05:28,094
- Good. - Sally?
126
00:05:28,194 --> 00:05:29,862
I'll have some cafe au lait.
127
00:05:29,962 --> 00:05:30,963
Cafe au lait. Anatole?
128
00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:32,098
How about you, Laura?
129
00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:33,633
- Cafe au lait sound fine. - Good.
130
00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:34,467
Pickles?
131
00:05:34,567 --> 00:05:35,835
I'll have some cafe au lait.
132
00:05:35,935 --> 00:05:37,904
Only, make mine black.
133
00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:45,945
Pickles, cafe au lait is coffee with milk.
134
00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:47,547
In French, lait means milk.
135
00:05:47,647 --> 00:05:48,514
So?
136
00:05:48,614 --> 00:05:50,550
So you wanted cafe au lait black.
137
00:05:50,650 --> 00:05:53,820
That's coffee with milk only without the milk.
138
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:56,489
Well, I like to try different things.
139
00:05:56,589 --> 00:05:59,125
I don't think there's anything wrong in that.
140
00:05:59,225 --> 00:06:01,194
Sometimes I look at her and wonder and other times
141
00:06:01,294 --> 00:06:03,496
I just look.
142
00:06:03,596 --> 00:06:05,231
I'll just have some iced coffee.
143
00:06:05,331 --> 00:06:06,499
How about you, Herman?
144
00:06:06,599 --> 00:06:10,136
Oh, I'll have a glass of warm skim milk,
145
00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:11,437
body temperature please.
146
00:06:16,843 --> 00:06:19,512
Cold milk makes him car sick.
147
00:06:19,612 --> 00:06:21,280
Yeah, that's right.
148
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,216
Ever since I was a kid, you know.
149
00:06:23,316 --> 00:06:24,984
Would that be all, sir?
150
00:06:25,084 --> 00:06:26,018
Well, I guess so unless--
151
00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:27,253
Rob?
152
00:06:27,353 --> 00:06:28,521
You Laura how about something to eat?
153
00:06:28,621 --> 00:06:29,555
- No nothing for me. - Not for me either.
154
00:06:29,655 --> 00:06:30,857
We have a bit of a drive back.
155
00:06:30,957 --> 00:06:32,592
BUDDY: Well, I sure pity you suburbanites.
156
00:06:32,692 --> 00:06:34,660
Me and Pickles if we want to see a show we hop into a cab
157
00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:36,329
and like that, 10 minutes we're there, right?
158
00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:37,697
Yeah. Except we never go.
159
00:06:37,797 --> 00:06:40,032
He sits home and watches TV every night.
160
00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:44,670
I say what is the point of living in an exciting city
161
00:06:44,771 --> 00:06:47,707
if you're going to sit home and watch TV every night.
162
00:06:47,807 --> 00:06:50,009
I mean you might as well move to the suburbs
163
00:06:50,109 --> 00:06:52,979
with the rest of the squares and the hermit.
164
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:56,082
Oh, no offense.
165
00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:59,919
You're mad because I didn't defend your suburbs, huh?
166
00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:01,687
Well, it can't be it.
167
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:03,089
Even if you're against the suburbs,
168
00:07:03,189 --> 00:07:04,190
they let your kids in college.
169
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:11,397
No, it's back to thinking.
170
00:07:11,497 --> 00:07:13,699
Well, I love the suburbs.
171
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:15,535
If I ever get married and settle down--
172
00:07:15,635 --> 00:07:17,670
Which at this moment is a 20 to 1 shot.
173
00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:19,906
I'd like to live in a little farmhouse.
174
00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:23,509
Overlooking a field of warm skim milk.
175
00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:25,244
Body temperature.
176
00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:26,212
Oh, not me.
177
00:07:26,312 --> 00:07:27,880
Give me New York any day.
178
00:07:27,980 --> 00:07:28,815
Yeah, me too.
179
00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:29,982
What have you got in the suburbs?
180
00:07:30,082 --> 00:07:31,350
Oh Buddy, there are lots of things.
181
00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:32,385
Oh, sure.
182
00:07:32,485 --> 00:07:33,920
Big mortgage in a wet basement.
183
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,823
A tired wife that keeps yelling, "take out the garbage."
184
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:42,895
You're mad because I made a joke about you and your garbage.
185
00:07:42,995 --> 00:07:43,896
Is that it?
186
00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:49,135
It's not it.
187
00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:57,877
You didn't like the joke I told about your uncle.
188
00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:03,349
Wait a minute.
189
00:08:03,449 --> 00:08:05,985
And what a wedding they had.
190
00:08:06,085 --> 00:08:08,855
Somebody kept slipping something into the punch, you see.
191
00:08:08,955 --> 00:08:10,656
And her uncle kept walking around saying, "my,
192
00:08:10,756 --> 00:08:13,192
what a delicious fruit juice."
193
00:08:13,292 --> 00:08:15,661
Well, the poor guy gets so drunk, he fell sound asleep,
194
00:08:15,761 --> 00:08:19,265
crawled up on the pool table and just passed out.
195
00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:20,566
Pool table?
196
00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:22,068
Don't tell me he was bald and somebody banged
197
00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:24,337
his head in the sidewalk.
198
00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:26,405
No but when he was sound asleep,
199
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:29,141
several of the relatives picked him up off the pool table,
200
00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:30,176
put him on the floor.
201
00:08:30,276 --> 00:08:32,345
Then everybody yelled fire.
202
00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,513
You should have seen that guy crawling on the floor looking
203
00:08:34,614 --> 00:08:35,748
for the edge of the table.
204
00:08:38,784 --> 00:08:41,587
What a funny situation it was.
205
00:08:41,687 --> 00:08:43,456
Oh my goodness, darling, look at the time.
206
00:08:43,556 --> 00:08:44,423
We have to go.
207
00:08:44,523 --> 00:08:45,691
Oh, it's my fault Laura.
208
00:08:45,791 --> 00:08:46,859
I forced Rob to those last two stories.
209
00:08:46,959 --> 00:08:48,728
Well, we better get the check, huh?
210
00:08:48,828 --> 00:08:50,196
Anatole, check please.
211
00:08:50,296 --> 00:08:51,998
Buddy, would you get me some cigarettes, I'm all out.
212
00:08:52,098 --> 00:08:52,732
Why not, sweetie.
213
00:08:52,832 --> 00:08:53,766
You're my friend.
214
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:55,034
Hey, anybody else want anything?
215
00:08:55,134 --> 00:08:56,402
Peanuts, popcorn, chewing gum, anything?
216
00:08:56,502 --> 00:08:57,436
No, thank you.
217
00:08:57,536 --> 00:08:59,171
OK.
218
00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:00,940
Oh, I'll get that.
219
00:09:03,643 --> 00:09:06,012
OK, Anatole.
220
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:07,546
There you are. And keep the change.
221
00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:08,881
Oh, thank you, sir.
222
00:09:08,981 --> 00:09:10,716
Rob, how much was the broiled trout dinner,
223
00:09:10,816 --> 00:09:13,085
the sliced chicken, the whole tomato with cottage cheese,
224
00:09:13,185 --> 00:09:15,321
warm skim milk and the cafe au lait?
225
00:09:15,421 --> 00:09:16,489
Don't forget the tax.
226
00:09:16,589 --> 00:09:18,190
Oh the tax, yes. For two.
227
00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:19,125
Forget it.
228
00:09:19,225 --> 00:09:20,259
It was all taken care of.
229
00:09:20,359 --> 00:09:21,861
Oh, wonderful.
230
00:09:21,961 --> 00:09:24,297
OK, kitten here's your cigarettes.
231
00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:25,464
Now, where's my check?
232
00:09:25,564 --> 00:09:26,666
Oh, it's all taken care of, Buddy.
233
00:09:26,766 --> 00:09:28,134
Oh come on, Rob, this is my party.
234
00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,536
Well, I enjoyed myself as much as anybody else did.
235
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:32,138
Oh, that's not right.
236
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:34,006
After all we ate and all you and Laura had was coffee and cake.
237
00:09:34,106 --> 00:09:35,141
We had dinner.
238
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:36,909
All we had was coffee but then who's counting?
239
00:09:37,009 --> 00:09:38,644
Buy me a sports car sometime.
240
00:09:38,744 --> 00:09:39,979
All right.
241
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:41,647
I'd fight you for it if I didn't think I'd win.
242
00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:44,450
Rob, seriously, tomorrow night is on Buddy and me.
243
00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:46,152
- That's right. - What's tomorrow night?
244
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:47,420
Don't you remember?
245
00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:49,121
Tomorrow night we're all supposed to go to the preview
246
00:09:49,221 --> 00:09:50,456
of that new Swedish picture. You're coming, aren't you?
247
00:09:50,556 --> 00:09:51,691
- Oh, I wouldn't miss it. - Good.
248
00:09:51,791 --> 00:09:52,992
- Well, good night. - Good night.
249
00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:54,226
Nice and easy going home now.
250
00:09:54,327 --> 00:09:55,127
OK.
251
00:09:55,227 --> 00:09:56,062
Don't forget, Rob.
252
00:09:56,162 --> 00:09:57,530
Tomorrow night the treat's on us.
253
00:09:57,630 --> 00:09:59,065
That's if you can out-throw me, partner.
254
00:10:04,070 --> 00:10:06,672
You're mad because I picked up the check, is that it?
255
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:08,541
I don't care to discuss it.
256
00:10:08,641 --> 00:10:11,577
That's it.
257
00:10:11,677 --> 00:10:12,979
Honey you got to discuss it.
258
00:10:13,079 --> 00:10:14,747
You got to tell me why picking up a little check
259
00:10:14,847 --> 00:10:16,182
is going to keep our son out of college.
260
00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:20,486
If you picked up enough checks you could manage it.
261
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:23,255
Oh, Laura, you know you're being a little ridiculous.
262
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:24,156
Am I?
263
00:10:24,256 --> 00:10:25,424
Yes you are.
264
00:10:25,524 --> 00:10:28,260
And you didn't feel ridiculous picking up that check?
265
00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:29,795
No, why should I?
266
00:10:29,895 --> 00:10:31,831
Because Buddy was the host.
267
00:10:31,931 --> 00:10:33,733
He invited us to sit with them.
268
00:10:33,833 --> 00:10:36,836
Well, we had a cup of coffee.
269
00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:39,138
Rob, they had dinner.
270
00:10:39,238 --> 00:10:42,575
Buddy expected to and wanted to pay the check.
271
00:10:42,675 --> 00:10:46,145
Well, Laura it wasn't that big a check anyway.
272
00:10:46,245 --> 00:10:48,848
I don't care if it was $0.02 Rob.
273
00:10:48,948 --> 00:10:51,250
There's a principle involved here.
274
00:10:51,350 --> 00:10:53,619
Do you know why you did what you did?
275
00:10:53,719 --> 00:10:55,121
No, why?
276
00:10:55,221 --> 00:10:56,422
Never mind.
277
00:10:59,291 --> 00:11:00,593
You know why.
278
00:11:00,693 --> 00:11:01,627
No.
279
00:11:01,727 --> 00:11:03,095
I don't know why.
280
00:11:03,195 --> 00:11:05,164
But I would like to know what is wrong with picking up
281
00:11:05,264 --> 00:11:06,399
a little check.
282
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:12,505
Well-- well, people who grab for checks are trying
283
00:11:12,605 --> 00:11:13,639
to buy love and acceptance.
284
00:11:13,739 --> 00:11:14,840
And I just don't think you have to.
285
00:11:14,940 --> 00:11:16,075
There, I've said it.
286
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:22,081
Yeah, you said it.
287
00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:23,983
Now tell me where did you read it?
288
00:11:27,253 --> 00:11:30,056
One of those magazines you subscribe to.
289
00:11:30,156 --> 00:11:31,157
Oh boy.
290
00:11:31,257 --> 00:11:32,892
Here we go with the magazine articles again.
291
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:36,562
Well, you subscribe to them, not I.
292
00:11:36,662 --> 00:11:39,498
You mean to tell me I should never ever pick up a check.
293
00:11:39,598 --> 00:11:41,333
I didn't say that.
294
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:43,736
If the occasion calls for it, of course you should.
295
00:11:43,836 --> 00:11:45,838
I simply don't think that it's right for you
296
00:11:45,938 --> 00:11:47,506
to pick up every check that comes along.
297
00:11:47,606 --> 00:11:48,507
It's unbecoming and--
298
00:11:48,607 --> 00:11:50,142
I know.
299
00:11:50,242 --> 00:11:51,777
It'll keep our son out of Harvard.
300
00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:53,079
All right.
301
00:11:53,179 --> 00:11:56,649
You can joke about it all you want.
302
00:11:56,749 --> 00:11:57,883
All right.
303
00:11:57,983 --> 00:11:59,051
All right, I'll tell you what I'll do.
304
00:11:59,151 --> 00:12:00,686
When I get home I'll take a $10 bill.
305
00:12:00,786 --> 00:12:03,522
I'll put it in Richie's piggy bank for his college tuition.
306
00:12:03,622 --> 00:12:04,490
Now will you love me again?
307
00:12:04,590 --> 00:12:05,424
Aha.
308
00:12:05,524 --> 00:12:07,993
Aha what?
309
00:12:08,094 --> 00:12:09,662
You see what you just did?
310
00:12:09,762 --> 00:12:11,597
I almost wrecked the car.
311
00:12:11,697 --> 00:12:15,734
You said then would you love me again.
312
00:12:15,835 --> 00:12:17,970
Oh, come on.
313
00:12:21,307 --> 00:12:22,775
Are you trying to say that I offered
314
00:12:22,875 --> 00:12:24,543
to put the money in Richie's piggy bank
315
00:12:24,643 --> 00:12:25,478
so I could buy your love?
316
00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:26,846
You said it, darling.
317
00:12:26,946 --> 00:12:32,818
Not I. Oh, if only you can see how unbecoming.
318
00:12:32,918 --> 00:12:34,186
Unbecoming?
319
00:12:34,286 --> 00:12:35,921
You think it's unbecoming to like my friends.
320
00:12:36,021 --> 00:12:37,389
To want to be generous with them.
321
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:39,558
Listen Laura, a few things that you don't understand.
322
00:12:39,658 --> 00:12:42,361
In case you haven't noticed, men and women are different.
323
00:12:42,461 --> 00:12:43,796
Oh, are they?
324
00:12:43,896 --> 00:12:45,364
Yes, they are.
325
00:12:45,464 --> 00:12:46,699
Women.
326
00:12:46,799 --> 00:12:48,100
You know something?
327
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,169
When women go to lunch, nobody picks up the check.
328
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:54,773
"I had the tomato aspic.
329
00:12:54,874 --> 00:12:56,242
You had the watercress salad.
330
00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:59,078
And Millie you had you had the cucumber a la carte."
331
00:12:59,178 --> 00:13:01,113
Rob, I am merely trying to--
332
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:03,315
You are merely trying to make a woman out of me.
333
00:13:03,415 --> 00:13:06,352
And I'm not going to let you get away with it.
334
00:13:06,452 --> 00:13:07,953
You don't know how embarrassed I get when
335
00:13:08,053 --> 00:13:09,555
I got to go next door to Millie's
336
00:13:09,655 --> 00:13:12,558
and give her $0.32 for a head of cabbage she bought for you.
337
00:13:12,658 --> 00:13:14,260
Men don't do things like that.
338
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:15,227
Oh boy.
339
00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:17,062
Rob am I sorry I ever brought it up.
340
00:13:17,163 --> 00:13:19,465
I didn't realize how touchy you would be about discussing
341
00:13:19,565 --> 00:13:20,432
a little thought.
342
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:21,700
Well, don't worry darling.
343
00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:23,302
I'm not going to bring it up again, ever.
344
00:13:23,402 --> 00:13:24,870
Good.
345
00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,172
Oh, we're home.
346
00:13:32,878 --> 00:13:36,782
Oh, honey the mortgage payment is due tomorrow.
347
00:13:36,882 --> 00:13:38,450
Is it all right if I pay it?
348
00:13:38,551 --> 00:13:39,785
Why do you ask?
349
00:13:39,885 --> 00:13:41,654
Oh well, I didn't want you to think I wanted
350
00:13:41,754 --> 00:13:43,222
the bank to fall in love me.
351
00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:48,827
I think she's angry.
352
00:13:48,928 --> 00:13:49,762
Oh no.
353
00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:51,630
She's definitely angry.
354
00:13:55,935 --> 00:13:58,070
Well, Rob if I knew you were going to cook I
355
00:13:58,170 --> 00:13:59,705
wouldn't have had breakfast at home.
356
00:13:59,805 --> 00:14:00,673
Where's Laura?
357
00:14:00,773 --> 00:14:03,509
Ah, she's got a headache.
358
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:04,476
Oh.
359
00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:05,811
Want any toast with this?
360
00:14:05,911 --> 00:14:06,946
No, just coffee.
361
00:14:07,046 --> 00:14:07,947
Just coffee?
362
00:14:08,047 --> 00:14:09,348
Yeah, coffee will be fine.
363
00:14:09,448 --> 00:14:10,883
Unless you have some scrambled eggs lying around.
364
00:14:10,983 --> 00:14:12,384
You really want some scrambled eggs?
365
00:14:12,484 --> 00:14:13,485
No don't bother.
366
00:14:13,586 --> 00:14:15,554
Poached will be fine.
367
00:14:15,654 --> 00:14:18,057
How would you like some French toast with that?
368
00:14:18,157 --> 00:14:19,058
Only if you joined.
369
00:14:19,158 --> 00:14:20,192
I'm not going to join.
370
00:14:20,292 --> 00:14:21,994
I'll just have three poached eggs
371
00:14:22,094 --> 00:14:23,529
or maybe some bacon too, huh?
372
00:14:23,629 --> 00:14:24,430
Very crisp.
373
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:26,165
I don't like the fat.
374
00:14:26,265 --> 00:14:28,801
Hey, Rob, does Laura really have a headache
375
00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:30,302
or is she mad at you?
376
00:14:30,402 --> 00:14:31,136
Both.
377
00:14:31,237 --> 00:14:32,071
And how did you know?
378
00:14:32,171 --> 00:14:33,272
Just wishful thinking.
379
00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:34,740
What do you mean wishful thinking?
380
00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:35,841
You want to Laura to be mad at me?
381
00:14:35,941 --> 00:14:37,443
Sure.
382
00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:38,844
Millie's mad at me and I hate to think I've got the only rotten
383
00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:41,013
marriage in the neighbourhood.
384
00:14:41,113 --> 00:14:42,314
Hey, come on Rob tell me.
385
00:14:42,414 --> 00:14:43,949
What's Laura angry with you about?
386
00:14:44,049 --> 00:14:45,718
It's too silly to even talk about.
387
00:14:45,818 --> 00:14:46,685
You say poached or scrambled?
388
00:14:46,785 --> 00:14:47,953
Poached, poached.
389
00:14:48,053 --> 00:14:49,355
Listen, what's she angry with you about?
390
00:14:49,455 --> 00:14:52,224
Oh, you won't believe me when I tell you, Jerry.
391
00:14:52,324 --> 00:14:55,127
You know why my wife is in there giving me the silent treatment?
392
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:56,095
Why?
393
00:14:56,195 --> 00:14:57,596
I picked up a check in a restaurant.
394
00:14:57,696 --> 00:14:59,832
You picked up a check and she's mad at you?
395
00:14:59,932 --> 00:15:01,267
Yeah, I picked up a check.
396
00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:03,836
Bought dinner for Buddy and some of his gang and she
397
00:15:03,936 --> 00:15:04,770
got all upset about it.
398
00:15:04,870 --> 00:15:06,305
What's wrong with that?
399
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:09,875
Well, they had dinner and all we had was a cup of coffee
400
00:15:09,975 --> 00:15:10,776
and I grabbed the check.
401
00:15:10,876 --> 00:15:11,944
So?
402
00:15:12,044 --> 00:15:14,546
Well, my wife says that I did it--
403
00:15:17,449 --> 00:15:19,952
I did it because I want to make people like me.
404
00:15:20,052 --> 00:15:22,154
I want to make them like me by buying their love.
405
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:23,289
You know, to be popular.
406
00:15:23,389 --> 00:15:24,456
Yeah.
407
00:15:24,556 --> 00:15:25,925
They really come up with some wild ones, huh?
408
00:15:26,025 --> 00:15:27,359
Yeah, they sure do, Rob.
409
00:15:27,459 --> 00:15:29,128
But look, if it'll keep peace in the family,
410
00:15:29,228 --> 00:15:31,830
you better keep your hands in your pocket from now on.
411
00:15:31,930 --> 00:15:33,899
I don't intend to do any such thing.
412
00:15:33,999 --> 00:15:35,901
Well, now look, if it's bothering her,
413
00:15:36,001 --> 00:15:37,202
I think you better.
414
00:15:37,303 --> 00:15:39,371
I don't care if it does bother her by gosh.
415
00:15:39,471 --> 00:15:40,973
I'm going to go right ahead picking up checks.
416
00:15:41,073 --> 00:15:43,042
I don't want to be unpopular.
417
00:15:43,142 --> 00:15:45,044
I think it's great that I like to treat my friends.
418
00:15:45,144 --> 00:15:46,679
That's a wonderful trait to have.
419
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:48,180
Yeah.
420
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,882
I love to see that trait in people, even if your wife
421
00:15:49,982 --> 00:15:50,783
thinks it's a fault.
422
00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:52,484
That's right.
423
00:15:55,220 --> 00:15:57,156
You know what I can't understand?
424
00:15:57,256 --> 00:15:58,791
Of all the rotten faults I have, why
425
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:00,125
did she have to pick that one?
426
00:16:00,225 --> 00:16:01,327
It's not even the kind of fault you're
427
00:16:01,427 --> 00:16:04,196
supposed to find fault with.
428
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:06,198
Oh, I'm open hearted, I'm generous
429
00:16:06,298 --> 00:16:08,233
and if I want to pick up a check for my friends,
430
00:16:08,334 --> 00:16:09,768
it doesn't give her any excuse to lay
431
00:16:09,868 --> 00:16:11,737
in there with a headache, make me fix my own breakfast.
432
00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:12,738
You're right, Rob.
433
00:16:12,838 --> 00:16:13,872
You're generous.
434
00:16:13,972 --> 00:16:15,441
You like to do things for people.
435
00:16:15,541 --> 00:16:16,975
I'll bet that was one of the faults she loved about you most
436
00:16:17,076 --> 00:16:17,910
when she first met you.
437
00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:19,111
Right.
438
00:16:19,211 --> 00:16:20,646
Well, you give a woman her own way
439
00:16:20,746 --> 00:16:23,148
and she'll start chipping away at your faults one by one.
440
00:16:23,248 --> 00:16:24,616
The first thing you know you're perfect.
441
00:16:24,717 --> 00:16:26,919
And everybody hates you.
442
00:16:27,019 --> 00:16:29,955
I mean, who in the world likes a perfect person?
443
00:16:30,055 --> 00:16:32,057
Nobody, just nobody.
444
00:16:32,157 --> 00:16:34,226
Listen Rob, if you like to pick up checks,
445
00:16:34,326 --> 00:16:35,894
you just pick them up.
446
00:16:35,994 --> 00:16:36,962
Right.
447
00:16:37,062 --> 00:16:38,163
Enough with this philosophy.
448
00:16:38,263 --> 00:16:39,665
What about my eggs, huh?
449
00:16:45,304 --> 00:16:47,606
Rob, what did you do?
450
00:16:47,706 --> 00:16:49,208
You said poached.
451
00:16:49,308 --> 00:16:51,543
I shouldn't have beat those.
452
00:16:56,081 --> 00:16:58,384
Hey, how about poached scrambled?
453
00:16:58,484 --> 00:16:59,718
Hi, daddy.
454
00:16:59,818 --> 00:17:01,019
Oh, hi Rich.
455
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:02,921
Mommy said you'll cook my breakfast.
456
00:17:03,021 --> 00:17:05,057
Don't count on it, kid.
457
00:17:05,157 --> 00:17:07,059
What's that, noodles?
458
00:17:07,159 --> 00:17:08,293
Sit down, Rich.
459
00:17:08,394 --> 00:17:09,862
Hey listen, Rob. I got to go.
460
00:17:09,962 --> 00:17:11,063
I just lost my appetite.
461
00:17:11,163 --> 00:17:12,865
Hey, wait a minute Jerry.
462
00:17:12,965 --> 00:17:14,166
I want to fix another egg for you.
463
00:17:14,266 --> 00:17:16,201
Oh well, I'll have Millie fix them, thanks.
464
00:17:16,301 --> 00:17:18,637
Hey Jerry, look you think I'm right about grabbing checks,
465
00:17:18,737 --> 00:17:19,571
don't you?
466
00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:20,539
Sure, you're right Rob.
467
00:17:20,639 --> 00:17:22,408
Now listen, you stand firm and grab.
468
00:17:22,508 --> 00:17:25,043
Hey, that's my motto from now on.
469
00:17:25,144 --> 00:17:26,278
Stand firm and grab.
470
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:27,546
Listen, I got to get out of here.
471
00:17:27,646 --> 00:17:28,680
Millie will kill me. I'll see you later.
472
00:17:28,781 --> 00:17:29,848
OK Jerry.
473
00:17:29,948 --> 00:17:31,016
Bye.
474
00:17:31,116 --> 00:17:31,917
Daddy?
475
00:17:32,017 --> 00:17:33,052
Yeah, Rich?
476
00:17:33,152 --> 00:17:34,319
Can I have my breakfast?
477
00:17:34,420 --> 00:17:35,754
You sure can. What do you want?
478
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:36,655
How about an egg?
479
00:17:36,755 --> 00:17:38,056
A banana.
480
00:17:38,157 --> 00:17:41,593
A banana?
481
00:17:41,693 --> 00:17:42,795
OK, but why a banana?
482
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:46,098
That's the only thing you cook as good as mommy.
483
00:17:46,198 --> 00:17:50,035
You're right there.
484
00:17:50,135 --> 00:17:52,237
I should stand firm and grab.
485
00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:03,982
So this little old man says, "the nicest
486
00:18:04,082 --> 00:18:05,284
present you can bring to a little
487
00:18:05,384 --> 00:18:07,786
old man is a little old lady."
488
00:18:07,886 --> 00:18:11,757
hey, if you laugh I could go on this all night.
489
00:18:11,857 --> 00:18:12,691
You already have.
490
00:18:12,791 --> 00:18:14,059
It's 12 o'clock.
491
00:18:14,159 --> 00:18:16,061
Boy, when I'm entertaining, how flying times.
492
00:18:16,161 --> 00:18:17,329
- For you. - All right.
493
00:18:17,429 --> 00:18:19,031
We got the check. Irving.
494
00:18:19,131 --> 00:18:19,965
Anatole?
495
00:18:20,065 --> 00:18:21,433
Do we have to go now?
496
00:18:21,533 --> 00:18:22,634
This is fun.
497
00:18:22,734 --> 00:18:23,836
Yes we do.
498
00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:26,138
I promised your mother I'd have you home by 12:30.
499
00:18:26,238 --> 00:18:28,040
She's kidding.
500
00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:32,744
My mother wouldn't say a word even if we were home by 1:00.
501
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:34,179
Oh, all right.
502
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:35,981
- Here, I'll take that, Buddy. - Wait minute, Rob.
503
00:18:36,081 --> 00:18:37,015
That's mine tonight.
504
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:38,317
Oh no, Buddy, it's my treat.
505
00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:40,185
Gentlemen, may I please have the check here.
506
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:41,520
Rob, you took the check yesterday.
507
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:42,721
I know, I know.
508
00:18:42,821 --> 00:18:44,490
I know but you said you'd let me have it today.
509
00:18:44,590 --> 00:18:45,691
Did I, Laura?
510
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:46,592
I don't know.
511
00:18:46,692 --> 00:18:47,693
Well, I do, Buddy.
512
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:48,660
And I agreed to split it.
513
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:50,162
That's right. Warm milk is right.
514
00:18:50,262 --> 00:18:51,363
It's our check.
515
00:18:51,463 --> 00:18:53,232
Well, somebody please pay the check.
516
00:18:53,332 --> 00:18:54,766
I got to get Herman home before his mother
517
00:18:54,867 --> 00:18:56,802
starts dragging the river.
518
00:18:56,902 --> 00:18:58,203
This is absolutely correct.
519
00:18:58,303 --> 00:18:59,538
I wanted to make sure you didn't charge us
520
00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:01,106
for that extra dessert we didn't get.
521
00:19:01,206 --> 00:19:02,574
You mean you're not going to fight me for it?
522
00:19:02,674 --> 00:19:03,509
That's right.
523
00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:05,611
BUDDY: Why do you give up so easy?
524
00:19:05,711 --> 00:19:07,246
HERMAN: Buddy, what was my share?
525
00:19:07,346 --> 00:19:08,614
I had the warm skim milk.
526
00:19:08,714 --> 00:19:09,548
With the toast.
527
00:19:09,648 --> 00:19:10,582
I see it here.
528
00:19:10,682 --> 00:19:11,683
Warm toast--
529
00:19:11,783 --> 00:19:14,219
Oh, it was $12.75, Herman, with your tip.
530
00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:15,153
Shall we go, honey?
531
00:19:15,254 --> 00:19:16,188
Yes, dear.
532
00:19:16,288 --> 00:19:17,089
Good night, kiddies.
533
00:19:17,189 --> 00:19:18,023
Good night.
534
00:19:18,123 --> 00:19:19,224
Oh, Rob.
535
00:19:19,324 --> 00:19:20,392
Are you through with your dessert?
536
00:19:20,492 --> 00:19:22,361
Yeah, go ahead, Pickles.
537
00:19:22,461 --> 00:19:23,962
Anatole wrap it up.
538
00:19:24,062 --> 00:19:25,397
I'll take it home for the dog.
539
00:19:31,637 --> 00:19:34,940
[music playing]
540
00:19:39,811 --> 00:19:41,113
Thank you, darling.
541
00:19:41,213 --> 00:19:42,614
What for?
542
00:19:42,714 --> 00:19:44,850
Well, I don't know of any other husband who would have
543
00:19:44,950 --> 00:19:47,319
acted so quickly about correcting a fault.
544
00:19:47,419 --> 00:19:50,255
Especially one pointed out by his perfect wife.
545
00:19:50,355 --> 00:19:51,823
You are perfect.
546
00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:53,258
And you're welcome.
547
00:19:53,358 --> 00:19:55,394
You're perfectly welcome.
548
00:19:55,494 --> 00:19:57,896
But you don't have to be the one who inspired the big change.
549
00:19:57,996 --> 00:19:59,264
Well, who inspired it?
550
00:19:59,364 --> 00:20:01,400
Richie did this morning at breakfast.
551
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:02,734
What happened at breakfast?
552
00:20:02,834 --> 00:20:05,137
Well, you remember you had the headache?
553
00:20:05,237 --> 00:20:06,104
Yeah.
554
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:08,440
And I volunteered for KP.
555
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,442
And I just got to chatting with Richie
556
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:14,012
and all of a sudden in him I began to notice one of my--
557
00:20:14,112 --> 00:20:14,947
Traits?
558
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:16,548
No, faults.
559
00:20:16,648 --> 00:20:17,282
Popping up.
560
00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:18,483
What did he say?
561
00:20:18,584 --> 00:20:20,419
Well, It started innocently enough.
562
00:20:20,519 --> 00:20:23,589
We were just talking and I--
563
00:20:23,689 --> 00:20:25,057
How are things at school, Rich?
564
00:20:25,157 --> 00:20:26,558
Fine.
565
00:20:26,658 --> 00:20:29,061
How do you get along with Roy and Freddie these days?
566
00:20:29,161 --> 00:20:30,228
Fine.
567
00:20:30,329 --> 00:20:31,897
They still like to pick on you?
568
00:20:31,997 --> 00:20:33,198
No.
569
00:20:33,298 --> 00:20:34,633
You mean they don't beat up on you anymore?
570
00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:36,768
Nope and don't call me shrimpy.
571
00:20:36,868 --> 00:20:37,669
Well, how come?
572
00:20:37,769 --> 00:20:40,005
They don't play with me anymore.
573
00:20:40,105 --> 00:20:41,340
Why not?
574
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:43,909
Roy says I'm too young and I have baby toys.
575
00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:46,378
Well, they are only a year older than you are.
576
00:20:46,478 --> 00:20:47,779
And why do they mean baby toys?
577
00:20:47,879 --> 00:20:49,982
How about that great archery set I just got you?
578
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,450
They play with that.
579
00:20:51,550 --> 00:20:53,518
I thought you said they don't play with you anymore.
580
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:56,288
They play with it in Roy's yard.
581
00:20:56,388 --> 00:20:58,223
Why would they play with in Roy's yard?
582
00:20:58,323 --> 00:20:59,124
It's you archery set.
583
00:20:59,224 --> 00:21:01,727
Uh-uh, it's Freddie's.
584
00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:04,396
Richie, did Freddie take that archery set away from you?
585
00:21:04,496 --> 00:21:06,465
No, they traded me for it.
586
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:08,000
Traded you for it.
587
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,134
What did they give you?
588
00:21:09,234 --> 00:21:10,802
This.
589
00:21:10,902 --> 00:21:14,940
Do you mean to tell me you traded a $5 archery
590
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:16,375
set for a plastic whistle?
591
00:21:16,475 --> 00:21:18,443
No, they gave me something else.
592
00:21:18,543 --> 00:21:20,746
Well, I should hope they would give you something else.
593
00:21:20,846 --> 00:21:21,680
This.
594
00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:23,949
What's that?
595
00:21:24,049 --> 00:21:25,584
An X-ray of a tooth.
596
00:21:29,821 --> 00:21:31,089
Doggone it, Rich.
597
00:21:31,189 --> 00:21:33,025
Daddy, can I have a glass of milk?
598
00:21:33,125 --> 00:21:35,160
Yeah you can have a glass of milk.
599
00:21:35,260 --> 00:21:37,129
Rich, why did you let Rob and Freddie
600
00:21:37,229 --> 00:21:38,930
talk you into such a bad swap?
601
00:21:39,031 --> 00:21:39,898
I didn't.
602
00:21:39,998 --> 00:21:42,301
It was my idea to trade.
603
00:21:42,401 --> 00:21:44,503
Your idea?
604
00:21:44,603 --> 00:21:47,606
Well, why Rich, you've got at least a dozen plastic whistles.
605
00:21:47,706 --> 00:21:50,442
I don't have a picture of a tooth.
606
00:21:53,512 --> 00:21:57,482
Richie, did you really want a picture of a tooth?
607
00:22:03,221 --> 00:22:07,826
Rich you'd rather have kept that archery set, wouldn't you?
608
00:22:07,926 --> 00:22:08,860
Then why did you trade?
609
00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:14,966
Come here, son.
610
00:22:15,067 --> 00:22:18,670
Rich, you wanted to give them the archery set, didn't you?
611
00:22:18,770 --> 00:22:19,571
Uh-huh.
612
00:22:19,671 --> 00:22:20,672
Why?
613
00:22:20,772 --> 00:22:23,608
So Freddie will like me and play with me.
614
00:22:23,709 --> 00:22:25,077
Well, he didn't, did he?
615
00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:27,446
Uh-uh, he likes Roy.
616
00:22:27,546 --> 00:22:29,047
Well, did Roy give him anything?
617
00:22:29,147 --> 00:22:30,749
Uh-uh.
618
00:22:30,849 --> 00:22:33,418
You see, Rich, what you're trying to do
619
00:22:33,518 --> 00:22:37,222
is make people like you by giving them things.
620
00:22:37,322 --> 00:22:39,091
You don't have to do that, Rich.
621
00:22:41,626 --> 00:22:43,929
Maybe I didn't give him enough.
622
00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:48,266
Well, Rich look, if you had given him your catcher's
623
00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:50,102
mitt and your turtle, it still wouldn't
624
00:22:50,202 --> 00:22:51,470
make any difference anyway.
625
00:22:51,570 --> 00:22:53,004
If people are going to like you, they're
626
00:22:53,105 --> 00:22:54,673
going to like you whether you give them anything or not.
627
00:22:54,773 --> 00:22:56,508
I never gave Ellen anything.
628
00:22:56,608 --> 00:22:57,542
That's right.
629
00:22:57,642 --> 00:22:58,710
Ellen likes you, doesn't she?
630
00:22:58,810 --> 00:22:59,711
No.
631
00:23:03,215 --> 00:23:04,116
She loves me.
632
00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:10,822
She wants to marry me.
633
00:23:10,922 --> 00:23:13,725
Well, Rich why do you think she loves you?
634
00:23:13,825 --> 00:23:15,727
I don't know, just because she does.
635
00:23:15,827 --> 00:23:18,597
Well, she likes you for what you are.
636
00:23:18,697 --> 00:23:22,267
You see, Rich you just can't go buy friends.
637
00:23:22,367 --> 00:23:25,036
Now, did we learn anything here?
638
00:23:25,137 --> 00:23:27,139
Yeah.
639
00:23:27,239 --> 00:23:28,673
I'm not going to give Roy my turtle
640
00:23:28,774 --> 00:23:30,609
and let me play with my archery set.
641
00:23:30,709 --> 00:23:32,511
Here daddy, mind Mickey fro me.
642
00:23:32,611 --> 00:23:33,845
Where are you going, Rich?
643
00:23:33,945 --> 00:23:35,547
I'm going to go play with Ellen because she
644
00:23:35,647 --> 00:23:37,549
loves me for my own self.
645
00:23:42,053 --> 00:23:43,021
It's funny.
646
00:23:43,121 --> 00:23:45,457
Somehow you never think of your own faults
647
00:23:45,557 --> 00:23:47,526
being too bad until you start seeing
648
00:23:47,626 --> 00:23:49,127
your son inherit one of them.
649
00:23:49,227 --> 00:23:52,264
Oh well, check grabbing isn't the worst fault a man can have.
650
00:23:52,364 --> 00:23:53,865
Well, true.
651
00:23:53,965 --> 00:23:55,534
I'll tell you what, you're going to see a couple of change men
652
00:23:55,634 --> 00:23:57,002
around our family.
653
00:23:57,102 --> 00:23:59,771
No more trading for x-rays of teeth and no more check
654
00:23:59,871 --> 00:24:01,606
grabbing.
655
00:24:01,706 --> 00:24:02,507
How about a cigarette?
656
00:24:02,607 --> 00:24:03,642
I'd love one.
657
00:24:03,742 --> 00:24:05,243
OK.
658
00:24:05,343 --> 00:24:07,179
Give me a kiss first.
659
00:24:07,279 --> 00:24:08,180
There.
660
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:09,481
You were wrong.
661
00:24:09,581 --> 00:24:10,749
About what?
662
00:24:10,849 --> 00:24:12,818
Cigarettes for a kiss, you can buy love.
663
00:24:17,189 --> 00:24:18,490
Hi, daddy.
664
00:24:18,590 --> 00:24:20,892
I got my $5 archery set back.
665
00:24:20,992 --> 00:24:21,827
I see that.
666
00:24:21,927 --> 00:24:23,261
Well, how did you do that, Rich?
667
00:24:23,361 --> 00:24:24,863
I gave them something.
668
00:24:24,963 --> 00:24:26,565
What did you give them, Rich?
669
00:24:26,665 --> 00:24:29,901
A plastic whistle and a tooth X-ray.
670
00:24:30,001 --> 00:24:32,370
You mean they were willing to trade for that?
671
00:24:32,470 --> 00:24:33,772
No, Freddie wasn't.
672
00:24:33,872 --> 00:24:36,842
You mean you had to give Freddie something else?
673
00:24:36,942 --> 00:24:39,678
What did you give him, Rich?
674
00:24:39,778 --> 00:24:41,913
Richy, daddy asked you a question.
675
00:24:42,013 --> 00:24:44,382
What did you give Freddie to get your set back?
676
00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:46,251
A hard punch in the belly.
677
00:24:56,194 --> 00:24:59,898
[music playing]
46641
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.