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1
00:00:01,602 --> 00:00:04,742
[The partridge family's
"Come on get happy" Playing]
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00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:12,406
♪ hello, world, hear the
song that we're singing ♪
3
00:00:12,413 --> 00:00:14,783
♪ come on, get happy
4
00:00:16,717 --> 00:00:20,947
♪ a whole lot of lovin' is
what we'll be bringing ♪
5
00:00:20,954 --> 00:00:23,524
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
6
00:00:25,393 --> 00:00:28,363
♪ we had a dream we'd
go traveling together ♪
7
00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:30,232
♪ we'd spread a little love ♪
8
00:00:30,231 --> 00:00:32,071
♪ and then we'll
keep movin' on ♪
9
00:00:32,066 --> 00:00:35,166
♪ something always happens
whenever we're together ♪
10
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:38,769
♪ we get a happy feeling
when we're singing a song ♪
11
00:00:38,772 --> 00:00:42,782
♪ traveling along there's
a song that we're singing ♪
12
00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:45,476
♪ come on, get happy
13
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:51,251
♪ a whole lot of lovin' is
what we'll be bringing ♪
14
00:00:51,252 --> 00:00:54,122
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
15
00:00:54,122 --> 00:00:58,232
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
16
00:00:58,226 --> 00:01:02,096
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
17
00:01:04,198 --> 00:01:05,598
[♪♪]
18
00:01:09,703 --> 00:01:11,873
And I say those films
can't even compare
19
00:01:11,872 --> 00:01:13,542
with fellini and bergman.
20
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:16,441
I'm not comparing them to
fellini and bergman, you are.
21
00:01:16,444 --> 00:01:18,514
Look, I'll admit they
weren't polished,
22
00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:20,712
but those films were
bordering on genius.
23
00:01:20,714 --> 00:01:23,254
Those films were
bordering on boredom.
24
00:01:23,251 --> 00:01:24,581
Laurie: I never said
they were perfect.
25
00:01:24,585 --> 00:01:26,345
They're underground films.
26
00:01:26,354 --> 00:01:28,224
And that's where they
should've left them too.
27
00:01:28,222 --> 00:01:30,862
I'm afraid to ask,
but how was the film?
28
00:01:30,858 --> 00:01:32,188
Great. Terrible.
29
00:01:32,193 --> 00:01:33,833
I didn't realize you
were taking them
30
00:01:33,827 --> 00:01:35,397
to a controversial film.
31
00:01:35,396 --> 00:01:37,856
We went to see some
experimental films
32
00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:39,425
by some young filmmakers.
33
00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:42,173
And I thought the films
were extremely artistic
34
00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:43,570
and enlightening.
35
00:01:43,571 --> 00:01:45,911
Okay. Well, then maybe
you can explain to me
36
00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:47,436
why the flowers exploded.
37
00:01:50,178 --> 00:01:51,408
Why the flowers exploded?
38
00:01:51,412 --> 00:01:52,812
That's obvious, Danny.
39
00:01:52,813 --> 00:01:54,383
Well, of course, it's obvious.
40
00:01:54,382 --> 00:01:56,782
Danny: Fine. Then
maybe you can explain
41
00:01:56,784 --> 00:01:59,424
why they covered that asparagus
patch with whipped cream.
42
00:01:59,420 --> 00:02:01,620
I hate to interrupt, Reuben,
but it's time for Danny
43
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:02,822
to go to bed.
44
00:02:02,823 --> 00:02:04,023
Oh, what a shame.
45
00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:05,594
Well, pleasant dreams.
46
00:02:05,593 --> 00:02:07,033
You've gotta be kidding.
47
00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:08,697
Come on, boy.
48
00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:09,926
[♪♪]
49
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:12,200
Good night, sweetheart.
Keith: Good night, Danny.
50
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,530
Good night.
51
00:02:15,035 --> 00:02:17,495
Asparagus and whipped cream?
52
00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:19,165
Laurie thinks that's art.
53
00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:21,513
You think "Flash
gordon" Serials are art.
54
00:02:21,509 --> 00:02:23,739
Well, at least "Flash
gordon" Is funny.
55
00:02:23,744 --> 00:02:26,814
It certainly makes more sense
than all that phony symbolism.
56
00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:29,384
I suppose you could do better?
57
00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:30,883
I'd love to make a movie
58
00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:33,854
putting on all those
hokey experimental films.
59
00:02:33,854 --> 00:02:37,794
Not only would mine be
funnier, it would be better too.
60
00:02:37,791 --> 00:02:39,891
Spoken like a true egomaniac.
61
00:02:41,429 --> 00:02:44,929
Mom, do we still have
that old 8 mm camera?
62
00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:46,932
Top shelf, hall closet.
63
00:02:46,934 --> 00:02:48,244
Mm-hm.
64
00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:49,766
Mm-hm.
65
00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:51,540
I forgot all about that
old camera, Shirley.
66
00:02:51,539 --> 00:02:53,009
How come you
don't use it anymore?
67
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,806
Well, I used to show
so many home movies
68
00:02:55,809 --> 00:03:00,079
that one by one, my
friends started to drift away.
69
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:02,520
Mom, it's beautiful.
70
00:03:04,218 --> 00:03:06,388
Would you like us to
leave you two alone?
71
00:03:07,555 --> 00:03:09,415
You know, I really could
make my own movie.
72
00:03:09,423 --> 00:03:14,963
Let's see, film and
developing, say, 15 bucks.
73
00:03:14,962 --> 00:03:17,562
Mom? Sorry.
74
00:03:17,565 --> 00:03:18,825
[Sighs]
75
00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,403
[Clears throat]
76
00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:24,642
Oh, no. No way.
77
00:03:24,638 --> 00:03:26,168
[♪♪]
78
00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:29,613
I only launch new careers.
I don't finance them.
79
00:03:30,811 --> 00:03:32,851
Where am I gonna
get that kind of money?
80
00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:36,217
Danny: Psst. Psst.
81
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:38,916
[♪♪]
82
00:03:57,137 --> 00:03:59,337
[♪♪]
83
00:04:07,715 --> 00:04:08,975
[♪♪]
84
00:04:12,853 --> 00:04:15,293
Come on, Danny. If you're
willing to lend me the money,
85
00:04:15,289 --> 00:04:17,159
there's gotta be
a string attached.
86
00:04:17,157 --> 00:04:18,987
Can't i...?
87
00:04:21,395 --> 00:04:23,295
Can't I just want
the satisfaction
88
00:04:23,297 --> 00:04:25,027
of helping a brother in need?
89
00:04:25,032 --> 00:04:27,032
Uh-huh. Try again.
90
00:04:27,034 --> 00:04:29,374
Okay, maybe I'm
investing in your future.
91
00:04:29,370 --> 00:04:31,400
Oh, sure you are.
92
00:04:31,405 --> 00:04:33,405
Okay...
93
00:04:34,442 --> 00:04:36,212
I want a piece of the action.
94
00:04:36,209 --> 00:04:38,279
Piece of what action?
95
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:41,908
Lights, camera, action.
96
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:43,415
[♪♪]
97
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,187
This is ridiculous.
98
00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:50,589
Humans are ridiculous.
99
00:04:50,591 --> 00:04:52,591
That's gonna be the
message of my film.
100
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,693
Come on, give it a try.
101
00:04:54,695 --> 00:04:56,655
All right, what do
you want me to do?
102
00:04:56,664 --> 00:04:59,534
Now, you're Cleopatra
103
00:04:59,533 --> 00:05:02,203
and I want you to exit
your tent to this door.
104
00:05:02,202 --> 00:05:05,812
Now, Cleopatra was very
sexy, so be sexy, okay?
105
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:07,006
I feel silly.
106
00:05:07,007 --> 00:05:09,937
Don't worry about
it. Just act natural.
107
00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:11,613
Danny: You better
make up your mind.
108
00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:14,252
Do you want her to
act natural or act sexy?
109
00:05:14,247 --> 00:05:16,617
I know what he wants.
110
00:05:18,352 --> 00:05:19,552
Okay.
111
00:05:19,553 --> 00:05:21,393
[Camera whirring]
112
00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:25,529
Cleopatra being sexy. Take one.
113
00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:28,356
And action.
114
00:05:29,797 --> 00:05:31,567
[♪♪]
115
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,430
Cut it.
116
00:05:34,435 --> 00:05:37,065
Cleopatra being dull. Take one.
117
00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:40,910
[♪♪]
118
00:05:42,510 --> 00:05:45,710
♪ everybody's going places ♪
119
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:49,023
♪ doing things
120
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:51,576
♪ look at all the
smiling faces ♪
121
00:05:51,585 --> 00:05:53,885
♪ sing
122
00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:56,318
♪ we're having a ball ♪
123
00:05:56,323 --> 00:05:57,523
♪ doing a number
124
00:05:57,525 --> 00:05:59,155
♪ having a ball
125
00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:00,959
♪ getting it on
126
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:05,901
♪ together, together together ♪
127
00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:08,437
♪ having a ball
128
00:06:08,436 --> 00:06:09,766
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
129
00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,440
♪ having a ball
130
00:06:11,439 --> 00:06:14,069
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
131
00:06:14,074 --> 00:06:19,254
♪ town to town we've found
the sound that's happening ♪
132
00:06:19,246 --> 00:06:21,576
♪ and what we've found ♪
133
00:06:21,582 --> 00:06:24,882
♪ is what we play and sing ♪
134
00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:26,115
♪ yeah
135
00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:27,319
♪ we're having a ball ♪
136
00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:28,790
♪ just doing a number
137
00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:30,389
♪ having a ball
138
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,460
♪ just getting it on
139
00:06:32,460 --> 00:06:38,570
♪ together, together together ♪
140
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:39,996
♪ having a ball
141
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,470
♪ together
142
00:06:41,469 --> 00:06:42,669
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
143
00:06:42,670 --> 00:06:44,140
♪ together
144
00:06:44,137 --> 00:06:45,967
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
145
00:06:45,973 --> 00:06:47,243
♪ together
146
00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:48,980
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
147
00:06:48,976 --> 00:06:50,236
♪ together
148
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:52,283
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
149
00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:53,749
♪ together
150
00:06:53,747 --> 00:06:55,377
♪ yeah, we're having a ball ♪
151
00:06:55,382 --> 00:06:56,752
♪ together
152
00:06:56,750 --> 00:06:58,420
♪ yeah, having a ball
153
00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,648
[laughing]
154
00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:07,159
Waiting for someone?
155
00:07:08,395 --> 00:07:10,195
Uh, yeah.
156
00:07:10,197 --> 00:07:12,497
Mr. Kincaid. He's
gonna be in our film.
157
00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:14,270
Oh, really?
158
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,497
Well, he doesn't actually
know he's gonna be in our film.
159
00:07:17,505 --> 00:07:19,335
All right, let's have it.
160
00:07:19,339 --> 00:07:21,109
Uh, it was all Danny's idea.
161
00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:22,438
It's ingenious.
162
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,282
In fact, it borders
on being diabolical.
163
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:27,277
Yeah. You see, my film
needed a little production value.
164
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:30,580
And we couldn't afford
any costumes, so...
165
00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:32,554
We invited Mr. Kincaid
to a costume party.
166
00:07:33,487 --> 00:07:34,857
You didn't.
167
00:07:36,423 --> 00:07:37,793
[Doorbell rings]
168
00:07:42,395 --> 00:07:43,855
[♪♪]
169
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:47,126
[Door closes]
170
00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:48,744
Rueben: Talk about
your law and order.
171
00:07:48,736 --> 00:07:50,566
A guy isn't safe on
the streets anymore.
172
00:07:51,539 --> 00:07:53,139
What happened?
173
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:55,640
Oh, a couple of wiseacres
followed me here in the car.
174
00:07:55,643 --> 00:07:59,313
And then they got mad because
I wouldn't Grant their wish.
175
00:07:59,312 --> 00:08:01,582
What wish was that?
176
00:08:01,582 --> 00:08:03,822
I don't wanna talk about it.
177
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:06,217
But if I hadn't managed to
poke one of them in the eye
178
00:08:06,219 --> 00:08:07,719
with my magic wand,
179
00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:10,591
well, I might not
be here right now.
180
00:08:10,591 --> 00:08:13,061
Oh, and I even
got my hem all dirty.
181
00:08:15,128 --> 00:08:19,198
Hey, why don't you
have your costume on?
182
00:08:20,701 --> 00:08:24,941
Reuben, I have a
confession to make.
183
00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:27,508
I have a couple of rotten kids.
184
00:08:29,677 --> 00:08:32,437
This isn't a put-on.
185
00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,915
No. No, they wouldn't.
186
00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:39,217
Dolley Madison. Take one.
187
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:40,649
They would.
188
00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:43,592
Reuben, you're on camera.
189
00:08:45,458 --> 00:08:46,858
[♪♪]
190
00:09:07,581 --> 00:09:09,151
Reuben: Some
world premiere this is.
191
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:11,179
You don't have one
searchlight out front.
192
00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:12,624
Kids, here are your seats.
193
00:09:12,620 --> 00:09:14,290
Well, it's only a home movie.
194
00:09:14,287 --> 00:09:17,457
But maybe I should go
outside and wave a flashlight.
195
00:09:17,457 --> 00:09:19,457
It's gonna be good.
You'll really like it.
196
00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,029
I certainly hope so,
197
00:09:21,028 --> 00:09:22,998
the way you've been
hounding us the last two weeks.
198
00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:25,596
Popcorn. Get your
home-popped popcorn here.
199
00:09:25,599 --> 00:09:28,599
Mr. Kincaid?
200
00:09:28,602 --> 00:09:30,902
Thought popcorn was
supposed to be white.
201
00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:32,974
So? So, what if
it's a little burned?
202
00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:35,443
This isn't a first-class
theater, you know.
203
00:09:35,442 --> 00:09:38,282
You could do charcoal
etchings with this stuff.
204
00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:40,308
When are we gonna see the movie?
205
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:42,753
Yeah. I'm getting bored.
206
00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:44,850
Wait until you see the movie.
207
00:09:46,353 --> 00:09:49,023
Okay. Ready.
208
00:09:49,022 --> 00:09:51,162
Now, remember,
this is just a rough cut.
209
00:09:51,158 --> 00:09:53,158
I've been editing it
on that little viewer,
210
00:09:53,160 --> 00:09:55,230
so this is the first time
I'm gonna see it myself.
211
00:09:55,228 --> 00:09:56,428
What does that mean?
212
00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:57,799
That means that your big brother
213
00:09:57,798 --> 00:09:59,598
is copping out.
214
00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:06,237
[Projector whirring]
215
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:11,840
What's that?
216
00:10:11,845 --> 00:10:13,145
I put them in.
217
00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:15,046
You can't have a
film without credits.
218
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:23,157
I thought this film was
titled the history of the world.
219
00:10:23,156 --> 00:10:25,416
Danny: It was. We
had to change the title.
220
00:10:25,425 --> 00:10:28,295
We ran out of film in the
middle of the 16th century.
221
00:10:33,801 --> 00:10:35,671
"produced by Danny partridge"?
222
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:37,039
I deserve a credit.
223
00:10:43,811 --> 00:10:47,381
"inspired and financed
by Danny partridge."
224
00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:52,852
all: "entire production under
the personal supervision
225
00:10:52,853 --> 00:10:54,253
of Danny partridge."
226
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:01,460
Where's my credit?
227
00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:03,331
I ran out of paper towels.
228
00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:08,099
Reuben: Oh, that's
exciting. [Shirley laughs]
229
00:11:08,101 --> 00:11:09,501
Shirley: Very good, Chris.
230
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:10,742
You're a real artist.
231
00:11:10,738 --> 00:11:12,738
Laurie: That's really cute.
232
00:11:14,274 --> 00:11:15,814
Oh. [Laughs]
233
00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:19,354
Laurie: That is
delightful, Tracy.
234
00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:23,475
Hey, Keith, this is great stuff.
235
00:11:23,483 --> 00:11:25,893
You could sell it to
the keyhole theater.
236
00:11:28,655 --> 00:11:30,055
What's that?
237
00:11:30,057 --> 00:11:32,417
The stuff we couldn't
sell to the theater.
238
00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:33,885
Oh, funny.
239
00:11:33,894 --> 00:11:35,734
Shirley: Oh.
240
00:11:35,729 --> 00:11:37,459
[Danny wolf whistling]
241
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:42,838
Very sexy, Laurie.
242
00:11:42,836 --> 00:11:45,066
Well, I tried.
243
00:11:46,573 --> 00:11:47,943
[Laurie laughing]
244
00:11:47,941 --> 00:11:50,541
Laurie: Oh. That's great, mom.
245
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,913
Reuben: And you've been
wasting your life singing.
246
00:11:52,913 --> 00:11:56,223
Laurie: What a ham.
I'm a real Sophia loren.
247
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:57,346
Who? Who?
248
00:11:58,451 --> 00:12:00,451
[All laughing]
249
00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,132
I just realized,
for the first time,
250
00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:08,587
how much I look like my mother.
251
00:12:08,595 --> 00:12:10,795
I feel sorry for your father.
252
00:12:10,798 --> 00:12:13,128
[Laughs]
253
00:12:13,133 --> 00:12:15,403
Shirley: You're
beautiful, Reuben.
254
00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:19,973
There goes our gp rating.
255
00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:25,782
Psst, Keith? Keith, come here.
256
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:31,179
What is it? We're just
getting to the best part.
257
00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:33,824
I know. Do you
hear that laughter?
258
00:12:33,821 --> 00:12:35,391
Yeah. I think they like it.
259
00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:37,088
Even more than I
thought they would.
260
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:39,430
Exactly. You never know
what the public will like.
261
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:43,296
I always thought I'd be worried
about getting my 15 bucks back.
262
00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:46,196
Keith, we're sitting
on a gold mine.
263
00:12:46,199 --> 00:12:47,999
[♪♪]
264
00:12:55,375 --> 00:12:57,075
[♪♪]
265
00:12:58,411 --> 00:12:59,881
Okay.
266
00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,710
At 25 cents admission,
267
00:13:01,714 --> 00:13:03,124
all we have to
sell is 60 tickets
268
00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:05,246
and we've covered
the cost of the film.
269
00:13:05,252 --> 00:13:07,222
Anything after
that is pure profit.
270
00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:08,220
[Sighs]
271
00:13:08,221 --> 00:13:09,521
To tell you the truth, Danny,
272
00:13:09,522 --> 00:13:11,222
I was a little
disappointed with the film.
273
00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,194
Name one thing wrong with it.
274
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,097
Soft focus, overexposure,
275
00:13:16,096 --> 00:13:19,596
sun glare, strobing
effect, harsh lighting.
276
00:13:19,599 --> 00:13:21,299
Well, if you're
gonna be picky...
277
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:23,801
Besides, it was
supposed to be funny.
278
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:25,573
And everyone
agrees it was funny.
279
00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:28,006
Yeah.
280
00:13:28,008 --> 00:13:30,308
When Reuben walked
in in that dress...
281
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,410
See? You think it was funny.
282
00:13:33,981 --> 00:13:36,421
Yeah, it was funny, I guess.
283
00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:37,746
[Sighs]
284
00:13:37,750 --> 00:13:40,790
Okay, let's give it a shot.
Where shall we show it?
285
00:13:40,787 --> 00:13:43,887
Grauman's Chinese is booked.
286
00:13:45,592 --> 00:13:47,432
How about our garage?
287
00:13:47,427 --> 00:13:48,727
[♪♪]
288
00:13:48,728 --> 00:13:51,758
Okay, Mr. Promoter,
where are all the people?
289
00:13:51,764 --> 00:13:53,474
Give them a chance.
290
00:13:53,466 --> 00:13:57,396
I think an hour and a
half is a terrific chance.
291
00:13:57,404 --> 00:13:59,514
We should have had
a sneak preview first.
292
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:02,266
Then word of mouth
would stir people's interest.
293
00:14:02,275 --> 00:14:04,005
When enough
people are interested,
294
00:14:04,011 --> 00:14:06,081
wham, we sock it to them.
295
00:14:06,079 --> 00:14:07,449
I'm not interested in the money.
296
00:14:07,447 --> 00:14:09,317
I'm just interested
in aesthetics.
297
00:14:09,316 --> 00:14:10,816
I wanna be judged by my peers.
298
00:14:10,817 --> 00:14:13,117
But your peers didn't show up.
299
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:16,064
Yeah, well, I've
waited long enough.
300
00:14:16,056 --> 00:14:17,956
I got a date. Where you going?
301
00:14:17,958 --> 00:14:19,328
[Sighs]
302
00:14:19,326 --> 00:14:21,356
If I'm unlucky, the taco stand.
303
00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:25,429
If I'm lucky, muldoon's point.
304
00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:26,902
[♪♪]
305
00:14:30,170 --> 00:14:33,570
That would be
some sneak preview.
306
00:14:33,573 --> 00:14:35,313
[♪♪]
307
00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:51,993
You know, kid,
308
00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:54,732
it ain't any of my business,
because the meter's running.
309
00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:56,257
But I don't think
any of these people
310
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,863
are here to see a movie.
311
00:14:57,864 --> 00:14:59,934
It's perfect.
312
00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:01,233
They'll have
something to look at
313
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,734
when they come up for air.
314
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:04,595
They ain't gonna see nothing.
315
00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:06,244
The windows are all steamed up.
316
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:08,109
I'm counting on the
film being good enough
317
00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:09,608
to grab their interest.
318
00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:11,039
Is it dirty?
319
00:15:11,044 --> 00:15:12,344
Of course not.
320
00:15:12,345 --> 00:15:14,605
Then it ain't gonna
grab their interest.
321
00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:18,023
Come on, give me a hand.
322
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:20,188
[♪♪]
323
00:15:27,995 --> 00:15:29,595
Look at these people.
324
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:32,926
The guys are only interested
in the girls as sex objects.
325
00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:35,672
I don't think it's right.
326
00:15:35,668 --> 00:15:37,268
Uh...
327
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,740
Yeah, I know what you mean.
328
00:15:39,739 --> 00:15:41,069
[Sighs]
329
00:15:41,074 --> 00:15:44,344
Well, wanna go get
a taco or something?
330
00:15:44,344 --> 00:15:48,784
Imagine, me out
with Keith partridge.
331
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:51,051
[♪♪]
332
00:15:58,558 --> 00:16:00,188
Oh, no.
333
00:16:00,193 --> 00:16:03,403
Wait here. And don't look.
334
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:08,996
[♪♪]
335
00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:12,273
Danny, what are you doing?
336
00:16:12,272 --> 00:16:16,042
Having a sneak
preview for your peers.
337
00:16:16,043 --> 00:16:17,443
What is this?
338
00:16:17,444 --> 00:16:19,954
Guy 1: Somebody's
idea of a joke?
339
00:16:19,946 --> 00:16:21,376
[Horns honking]
Let's get out of here.
340
00:16:21,381 --> 00:16:23,881
These kids are
getting more rocks.
341
00:16:23,883 --> 00:16:25,723
[Car horns blaring]
342
00:16:28,055 --> 00:16:30,315
Guy 2: Get out of the
way. Give me another rock.
343
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,093
Guy 3: Get me another rock.
344
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:37,757
Why did you have to
show it at muldoon's point?
345
00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:40,734
You said you wanted to
be judged by your peers.
346
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,433
I didn't know they'd be armed.
347
00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:45,135
I don't mind being
panned, but being pelted...
348
00:16:45,138 --> 00:16:49,208
Keith, maybe you can't blame
it entirely on the audience.
349
00:16:49,209 --> 00:16:52,109
Looking back, I see your
movie had one basic flaw.
350
00:16:52,112 --> 00:16:53,512
What's that?
351
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:54,513
It was rotten.
352
00:16:54,514 --> 00:16:56,954
What? I'm just being objective.
353
00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:59,089
A bomb is a bomb.
354
00:16:59,086 --> 00:17:00,446
Looks like zanuck and Hitchcock
355
00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:02,553
are having a big
production meeting.
356
00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:04,285
If you're talking
about your next film,
357
00:17:04,291 --> 00:17:07,831
I hope you'll consider
leaving town to shoot it.
358
00:17:07,827 --> 00:17:10,297
We're going shopping.
Do you need anything?
359
00:17:10,297 --> 00:17:12,527
Yeah. Stop at the
local torture shop
360
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,032
and pick up a pair
of thumbscrews.
361
00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:15,433
Danny's size.
362
00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:17,595
Why do that? If you
really wanna torture him,
363
00:17:17,604 --> 00:17:19,514
just show him your movie again.
364
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:21,840
Bye. Bye.
365
00:17:21,841 --> 00:17:24,911
Boy, everybody turns
on you when you're down.
366
00:17:24,911 --> 00:17:27,181
[Phone rings]
367
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:30,649
Hello?
368
00:17:30,650 --> 00:17:32,220
This is, uh, Sam greasley,
369
00:17:32,219 --> 00:17:34,019
owner of the royal theater.
370
00:17:34,020 --> 00:17:35,990
Can I speak to Keith partridge?
371
00:17:35,988 --> 00:17:38,318
Speaking. Oh, yeah, Keith.
372
00:17:38,325 --> 00:17:39,825
Listen, I understand
that you have a film
373
00:17:39,826 --> 00:17:42,126
with all the members
of the family in it.
374
00:17:42,129 --> 00:17:43,699
How did you know that?
375
00:17:43,696 --> 00:17:46,296
Well, my son said he saw
it up at muldoon's point.
376
00:17:46,299 --> 00:17:48,929
Oh, did he like it?
377
00:17:48,935 --> 00:17:50,265
He... he didn't say.
378
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:51,570
But I feel
379
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,241
that any partridge family movie
380
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,310
would be worthwhile
to show in my theater.
381
00:17:55,308 --> 00:17:56,808
You're kidding. No.
382
00:17:56,809 --> 00:17:58,379
You know, just
a little something
383
00:17:58,378 --> 00:18:00,448
to fill in after
the main feature.
384
00:18:00,447 --> 00:18:03,647
What if I gave
you, say, oh, $100?
385
00:18:03,650 --> 00:18:05,880
A hundred dollars?
386
00:18:05,885 --> 00:18:07,545
It's a crank call.
387
00:18:07,554 --> 00:18:09,054
Well, yeah. Sure, Mr. Greasley,
388
00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:11,455
I'll bring it by tonight.
Yeah, okay. Goodbye.
389
00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:13,258
Oh, and by the way,
390
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:14,960
you've made a new
filmmaker really happy.
391
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:17,361
Yeah. Okay. Goodbye.
392
00:18:18,631 --> 00:18:19,631
[Sighs]
393
00:18:19,632 --> 00:18:21,832
So you thought it
was a bomb, huh?
394
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:24,304
The owner of the
royal theater just called
395
00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:27,374
and offered me $100 for my film.
396
00:18:27,374 --> 00:18:30,684
That's six-and-a-half times
the original investment.
397
00:18:30,677 --> 00:18:35,507
Keith, when can you have your
next production ready to roll?
398
00:18:35,515 --> 00:18:38,475
You know, I was beginning
to have self-doubts.
399
00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:41,815
But $100 for my first film.
400
00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:44,791
Boy, wait till mom
hears about this.
401
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:46,361
[♪♪]
402
00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:48,359
[Tires screeching]
403
00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:51,162
[Sighs]
404
00:18:51,164 --> 00:18:54,074
You don't think there might
be two partridge families?
405
00:18:54,066 --> 00:18:55,566
I'll kill them.
406
00:18:56,703 --> 00:18:58,373
[♪♪]
407
00:19:03,075 --> 00:19:04,605
When you took those pictures,
408
00:19:04,611 --> 00:19:07,551
you never said anything
about showing them in public.
409
00:19:07,547 --> 00:19:09,177
Me playing Cleopatra.
410
00:19:09,182 --> 00:19:11,682
I'll never be able to face
any of my friends again.
411
00:19:11,684 --> 00:19:13,494
You made me look pretty dumb.
412
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:15,286
If my teacher sees
that bathtub scene,
413
00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:19,088
I'll be thrown
out of first grade.
414
00:19:19,091 --> 00:19:20,531
[♪♪]
415
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:25,734
If you think I'm going to
make my screen debut
416
00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:30,402
with gossamer wings
and a dirty hem, forget it.
417
00:19:30,403 --> 00:19:32,643
Drove by the theater, huh? No.
418
00:19:32,639 --> 00:19:36,409
I read it in the entertainment
section of my paper.
419
00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:38,740
Why couldn't you choose
420
00:19:38,745 --> 00:19:41,805
a nice, normal
hobby, like sorcery?
421
00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:44,724
Don't worry, Reuben,
that film will not be shown.
422
00:19:44,717 --> 00:19:46,917
But, mom, I
promised Mr. Greasley
423
00:19:46,919 --> 00:19:48,119
I'd have it there tonight.
424
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:49,990
I can't go back on my word.
425
00:19:49,989 --> 00:19:51,289
The people are gonna expect
426
00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:52,891
to see the partridge
family on film.
427
00:19:52,892 --> 00:19:54,262
Fine. But first,
428
00:19:54,261 --> 00:19:57,231
you're going to cut out all
of the embarrassing parts.
429
00:19:57,230 --> 00:19:58,630
And we're going to help you.
430
00:19:58,631 --> 00:20:00,631
You're gonna censor
my film? Come on.
431
00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:02,603
That's like putting your
foot through a Rembrandt.
432
00:20:02,602 --> 00:20:03,942
Laurie: In this
case, it's more like
433
00:20:03,936 --> 00:20:05,736
putting your foot
through a beer sign.
434
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:08,408
[♪♪]
435
00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:13,354
[Sighs]
436
00:20:13,346 --> 00:20:15,746
Well, I hope you're happy.
437
00:20:15,748 --> 00:20:18,078
There lies the
best work of my life
438
00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:21,024
on the cutting room floor.
439
00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:22,990
Is that all? That's it.
440
00:20:24,524 --> 00:20:26,364
Like to know what's
left of my masterpiece?
441
00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:27,759
What?
442
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,900
Nothing but shots
of people waving.
443
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,096
You're kidding.
444
00:20:31,097 --> 00:20:32,697
[Sighs] No.
445
00:20:32,699 --> 00:20:35,499
And that's not exactly
what Mr. Greasley paid for.
446
00:20:35,502 --> 00:20:37,642
Mom, he's advertised.
447
00:20:37,637 --> 00:20:40,367
We're gonna have an
awful lot of explaining to do.
448
00:20:41,374 --> 00:20:43,584
I suppose that's true.
449
00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:45,206
Then I can work on my film.
450
00:20:45,211 --> 00:20:47,451
All: No!
451
00:20:49,449 --> 00:20:51,549
Okay, what am I gonna do?
452
00:20:51,551 --> 00:20:53,391
The only logical thing.
453
00:20:53,386 --> 00:20:55,656
Get the money
before he sees the film.
454
00:20:56,956 --> 00:20:59,986
Well, there is one way.
455
00:21:02,161 --> 00:21:04,561
If we all agree to it.
456
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:06,604
[Playing "Hello, hello"]
457
00:21:10,537 --> 00:21:12,097
♪ hello, hello
458
00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:14,244
♪ hello, hello
459
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:15,870
Keith: ♪ I love you so
460
00:21:15,875 --> 00:21:17,505
♪ I love you so
461
00:21:17,510 --> 00:21:19,450
Keith: ♪ yet it all began
462
00:21:19,446 --> 00:21:21,706
♪ when I ran
463
00:21:21,714 --> 00:21:23,184
♪ into you
464
00:21:23,182 --> 00:21:25,522
♪ not so long ago
465
00:21:25,518 --> 00:21:29,048
♪ and since that
day I wanted to say ♪
466
00:21:29,055 --> 00:21:31,415
♪ hello, oh, oh
467
00:21:32,792 --> 00:21:33,992
♪ hello
468
00:21:33,993 --> 00:21:35,233
♪ hello, hello
469
00:21:35,227 --> 00:21:37,297
♪ would you like to go
470
00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:38,856
all: ♪ would you like to go
471
00:21:38,865 --> 00:21:40,365
Keith: ♪ to a place with me
472
00:21:40,367 --> 00:21:41,667
♪ ah
473
00:21:41,668 --> 00:21:44,638
♪ where we can watch
474
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:46,967
♪ the hours go by
475
00:21:46,973 --> 00:21:51,413
♪ 'cause you're someone
I'd like to get to know ♪
476
00:21:51,411 --> 00:21:53,351
♪ oh, oh
477
00:21:53,346 --> 00:21:56,306
♪ I still don't know your name ♪
478
00:21:56,315 --> 00:21:59,785
♪ and I I couldn't care less ♪
479
00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:05,016
♪ I like what I already see ♪
480
00:22:07,093 --> 00:22:08,563
[audience laughs]
481
00:22:08,561 --> 00:22:11,101
♪ whatever sign you are
482
00:22:11,097 --> 00:22:14,467
♪ or what's your address ♪
483
00:22:15,635 --> 00:22:19,705
♪ don't really
matter much to me ♪
484
00:22:21,007 --> 00:22:22,537
♪ just wanna say
485
00:22:22,542 --> 00:22:24,442
♪ hello, hello
486
00:22:24,444 --> 00:22:26,514
♪ hello, hello
487
00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:28,183
♪ I love you so
488
00:22:28,180 --> 00:22:30,050
♪ I love you so
489
00:22:30,049 --> 00:22:32,319
♪ yet it all began
490
00:22:32,318 --> 00:22:34,218
♪ when I ran
491
00:22:34,220 --> 00:22:35,490
♪ into you
492
00:22:35,488 --> 00:22:38,118
♪ not so long ago
493
00:22:38,124 --> 00:22:40,134
♪ and since that day
494
00:22:40,126 --> 00:22:41,586
♪ I've wanted to say ♪
495
00:22:41,594 --> 00:22:44,464
♪ hello, oh, oh
496
00:22:45,832 --> 00:22:48,172
[audience laughs] ♪ hello, hello
497
00:22:48,167 --> 00:22:49,867
♪ hello
498
00:22:49,869 --> 00:22:52,039
♪ hello, hello
499
00:22:52,038 --> 00:22:54,468
[♪♪]
500
00:23:03,916 --> 00:23:06,946
One for you. One for
me. One for Mr. Kincaid.
501
00:23:06,953 --> 00:23:10,563
One for you. One for
me. One for Mr. Kincaid.
502
00:23:10,557 --> 00:23:14,027
One for you. One for me. One...
503
00:23:14,026 --> 00:23:15,226
What are you doing?
504
00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:17,157
Divvying up the money
from Mr. Greasley?
505
00:23:17,163 --> 00:23:18,503
No.
506
00:23:18,498 --> 00:23:20,628
We invested our money
in a new business.
507
00:23:20,633 --> 00:23:22,873
Well, it certainly
looks profitable.
508
00:23:22,869 --> 00:23:24,899
Did Reuben put up
the rest of the money?
509
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,514
No, but he's still a partner.
510
00:23:26,506 --> 00:23:28,506
Yeah. Only he doesn't
511
00:23:28,508 --> 00:23:29,778
exactly know he's a partner.
512
00:23:29,776 --> 00:23:31,706
I'm a little afraid
513
00:23:31,711 --> 00:23:33,451
to ask this next question,
514
00:23:33,446 --> 00:23:37,616
but, um, what kind of
business are you in?
515
00:23:37,617 --> 00:23:39,747
Oh, it's nothing
illegal or anything.
516
00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:41,652
We deal in a product.
517
00:23:41,654 --> 00:23:44,994
We sell them to different
psychedelic and book stores.
518
00:23:44,991 --> 00:23:48,801
They... they give us
a dollar for each one.
519
00:23:50,830 --> 00:23:53,260
Laurie: Hi. Hi, Reuben.
520
00:23:53,265 --> 00:23:54,925
Danny: Guess what, Mr. Kincaid?
521
00:23:54,934 --> 00:23:56,704
The three of us are
in business together.
522
00:23:56,703 --> 00:23:58,643
Yeah, and you're
in for a big cut.
523
00:23:59,839 --> 00:24:03,179
I think the lawsuit
will net me more.
524
00:24:04,744 --> 00:24:06,684
Reuben, what's the matter?
525
00:24:06,679 --> 00:24:09,279
This is the matter.
526
00:24:09,281 --> 00:24:11,651
[♪♪]
527
00:24:11,651 --> 00:24:13,491
[All laugh]
528
00:24:13,486 --> 00:24:14,946
I want one.
529
00:24:14,954 --> 00:24:17,424
It's cute. Can I have it?
530
00:24:17,423 --> 00:24:19,993
Oh, no. I am gonna sue.
531
00:24:19,992 --> 00:24:24,302
But first, my aunt Rita
asked me to send her one.
532
00:24:24,296 --> 00:24:26,226
[♪♪]
533
00:24:31,070 --> 00:24:32,840
[♪♪]
534
00:24:32,890 --> 00:24:37,440
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