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1
00:00:01,350 --> 00:00:03,284
[?]
2
00:00:08,023 --> 00:00:10,057
Hi. Hop in.
3
00:00:10,126 --> 00:00:11,926
Thanks, baby.
Dig you later.
4
00:00:13,362 --> 00:00:15,096
Hey, wait a minute.
What's this all about?
5
00:00:15,164 --> 00:00:17,332
[HORN HONKING]
Go, man. Light's, like, green.
6
00:00:17,399 --> 00:00:18,399
Huh? Well...
7
00:00:18,434 --> 00:00:19,434
[HORN HONKING]
8
00:00:19,435 --> 00:00:22,803
All right. Okay.
Where do we go?
9
00:00:22,871 --> 00:00:25,773
Straight, man, straight.
10
00:00:25,841 --> 00:00:26,841
Okay.
11
00:00:29,145 --> 00:00:31,346
My name's, um, Anthony Nelson.
What's yours?
12
00:00:31,414 --> 00:00:33,081
Amarantha Swarupinanda.
13
00:00:33,149 --> 00:00:34,216
TONY [CHUCKLING]:
What?
14
00:00:34,283 --> 00:00:36,318
Oh, I took my name
from my last incarnation.
15
00:00:36,385 --> 00:00:38,420
I was an Indian princess.
16
00:00:38,488 --> 00:00:40,122
Congratulations.
17
00:00:40,189 --> 00:00:42,457
Now, this is as far as I go.
I just live around the bend.
18
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,093
[?]
19
00:00:45,828 --> 00:00:47,379
Open the door.
20
00:00:47,380 --> 00:00:48,095
What?
21
00:00:48,247 --> 00:00:50,148
Open the door, please.
22
00:00:50,166 --> 00:00:52,283
Hey, what's the matter?
It's crisis time, baby.
23
00:00:52,351 --> 00:00:53,852
Open the door!
24
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:55,519
Okay, okay, okay.
25
00:00:55,588 --> 00:00:57,755
Okay, sure.
Well, there you are.
26
00:01:04,063 --> 00:01:05,830
Hey, hey, what's
all this about, huh?
27
00:01:05,932 --> 00:01:07,766
Cool it, baby, cool it.
28
00:01:10,686 --> 00:01:11,786
Major.
29
00:01:14,606 --> 00:01:15,640
Major.
30
00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:16,708
Yes, sir.
31
00:01:16,709 --> 00:01:18,243
You're Major Nelson?
Yes, sir. I am.
32
00:01:18,310 --> 00:01:20,511
I'm General Winfield Schaeffer,
your new neighbor.
33
00:01:20,579 --> 00:01:21,940
Oh. I didn't know
you were moving
34
00:01:21,980 --> 00:01:23,781
into the neighborhood, sir.
Oh, well, uh,
35
00:01:23,849 --> 00:01:25,569
I'm looking for my daughter.
Oh.
36
00:01:25,618 --> 00:01:27,385
[?]
37
00:01:31,039 --> 00:01:32,974
[?]
38
00:02:19,772 --> 00:02:21,706
[?]
39
00:02:26,728 --> 00:02:27,846
Yeah, she's only 17.
40
00:02:27,913 --> 00:02:30,865
She was to have met me
here an hour ago.
41
00:02:30,933 --> 00:02:32,213
She's very susceptible.
42
00:02:32,268 --> 00:02:34,002
It's a dangerous age, 17,
Nelson.
43
00:02:34,069 --> 00:02:35,870
Indeed it is, sir, yes.
Hippies.
44
00:02:35,938 --> 00:02:37,538
That's why I brought her
to Cocoa Beach
45
00:02:37,606 --> 00:02:39,140
where there's none
of that nonsense.
46
00:02:39,208 --> 00:02:40,289
[CHUCKLING] Yes.
47
00:02:40,309 --> 00:02:41,910
If you see her,
let me know, will you?
48
00:02:41,977 --> 00:02:44,017
I will do that. Yes, sir.
Carry on.
49
00:02:44,846 --> 00:02:46,948
Hey. Um...
50
00:02:48,417 --> 00:02:50,751
Something wrong, major?
51
00:02:50,819 --> 00:02:51,852
No.
52
00:02:51,921 --> 00:02:54,001
No, everything's fine, sir.
53
00:02:59,594 --> 00:03:00,874
[ENGINE STARTS]
54
00:03:05,351 --> 00:03:07,068
[?]
55
00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:12,073
All right, young lady.
Come on out.
56
00:03:12,141 --> 00:03:14,342
Thanks, maj.
You were groovy.
57
00:03:14,409 --> 00:03:16,289
[CHUCKLING] Yeah.
58
00:03:19,782 --> 00:03:20,782
Hey.
59
00:03:20,850 --> 00:03:22,717
Oh, well, don't let
Pops shake you.
60
00:03:22,785 --> 00:03:24,085
He's just a little square.
61
00:03:24,153 --> 00:03:26,154
[CHUCKLING] Yeah, sure.
62
00:03:26,221 --> 00:03:27,889
What's the idea
of the quick change?
63
00:03:27,990 --> 00:03:30,024
Freedom, baby, freedom.
64
00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:32,177
You know, if military schools
accepted girls,
65
00:03:32,244 --> 00:03:34,412
I'd be wearing a uniform.
66
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:37,882
So we just keep the real me
out of sight, right?
67
00:03:37,967 --> 00:03:39,967
Wrong. I'm taking you
to your father
68
00:03:40,035 --> 00:03:41,235
before this goes any further.
69
00:03:42,121 --> 00:03:43,137
Master.
Yah.
70
00:03:43,205 --> 00:03:45,005
Oh! Oh, I am sorry.
71
00:03:45,073 --> 00:03:46,808
I did not know you had company.
72
00:03:46,875 --> 00:03:49,076
Where'd she come from?
Who's she?
73
00:03:49,095 --> 00:03:51,262
Oh, I'm Majo...
She's my housekeeper.
74
00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:53,564
In that groovy, hippie outfit?
75
00:03:54,516 --> 00:03:56,484
Major, you're with it.
76
00:03:56,602 --> 00:03:57,685
"With it"?
77
00:03:57,737 --> 00:03:58,853
One of us.
78
00:03:58,904 --> 00:04:00,588
Gee, you had me scared
there for a minute.
79
00:04:00,656 --> 00:04:03,140
I thought you were gonna
turn out to be a fink.
80
00:04:03,192 --> 00:04:05,759
I am gonna turn out
to be a fink. Yes, I am.
81
00:04:05,828 --> 00:04:07,428
You're putting me on.
82
00:04:07,496 --> 00:04:09,130
How can you turn me in
as a hippie
83
00:04:09,198 --> 00:04:11,466
when you're going with a hippie?
84
00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:14,385
[CHUCKLING]
Oh, Jeannie is not a hippie.
85
00:04:14,420 --> 00:04:16,487
Heh. Yeah, yeah.
86
00:04:16,555 --> 00:04:18,289
So, like, um,
87
00:04:18,356 --> 00:04:21,726
I'll keep your secret
and you keep mine, right?
88
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:24,028
I think that's a very good idea.
89
00:04:24,046 --> 00:04:25,946
Peace, beautiful people.
90
00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:27,348
[LAUGHS UNEASILY]
91
00:04:28,550 --> 00:04:31,986
Oh, is that not
a lovely thought, master?
92
00:04:32,054 --> 00:04:33,554
Peace.
93
00:04:33,622 --> 00:04:35,356
I think we're in for war.
94
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:40,195
Tony. Oh, hi, Jeannie.
95
00:04:40,262 --> 00:04:41,963
Oh, have I got
terrible news for you.
96
00:04:42,031 --> 00:04:43,431
A general just
moved in next door.
97
00:04:43,498 --> 00:04:45,666
A general just
moved in next door.
98
00:04:45,735 --> 00:04:48,636
Yeah. And he's got a daughter
named Suzie that's seen Jeannie.
99
00:04:48,704 --> 00:04:50,405
Uh-oh.
My master told her
100
00:04:50,472 --> 00:04:51,706
I was the housekeeper.
101
00:04:51,774 --> 00:04:52,774
[GIGGLES]
102
00:04:52,775 --> 00:04:54,108
Is that not clever?
103
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:55,259
I don't know about his daughter,
104
00:04:55,327 --> 00:04:57,128
but the general is
a holy terror.
105
00:04:57,195 --> 00:04:58,796
He's in charge
of military discipline
106
00:04:58,864 --> 00:05:00,364
for the whole NASA installation.
107
00:05:00,432 --> 00:05:02,266
He goes around
shaking everybody up.
108
00:05:02,335 --> 00:05:03,456
Shaking...
Did you hear that?
109
00:05:03,485 --> 00:05:05,420
He goes from base to base
shaking everybody up.
110
00:05:05,487 --> 00:05:07,722
So, major, how's it going?
Oh!
111
00:05:07,789 --> 00:05:09,324
What are you doing here?
112
00:05:09,391 --> 00:05:11,125
This... This is
the general's daughter?
113
00:05:11,177 --> 00:05:12,376
Is he cool?
114
00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:13,444
JEANNIE:
Oh, yes,
115
00:05:13,512 --> 00:05:15,112
he is my master's best friend.
116
00:05:15,181 --> 00:05:16,447
Peace, baby.
117
00:05:16,515 --> 00:05:19,834
Always happy to meet
another beautiful person.
118
00:05:19,852 --> 00:05:21,202
Listen, if your father
finds you here,
119
00:05:21,269 --> 00:05:22,586
I'm gonna be in a lot...
120
00:05:22,605 --> 00:05:25,039
Oh, stay loose, maj.
Pop thinks I'm asleep.
121
00:05:25,107 --> 00:05:27,308
[DOORBELL CHIMES]
Oh, that makes everything fine.
122
00:05:27,375 --> 00:05:28,576
Thinks she's asleep.
Yeah.
123
00:05:28,610 --> 00:05:31,378
Welcome to the crash pad,
people. Come on in.
124
00:05:31,446 --> 00:05:33,380
[CROWD CHATTERING]
125
00:05:34,483 --> 00:05:36,017
[TONY SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]
126
00:05:36,085 --> 00:05:38,285
A house party, man.
A housewarming.
127
00:05:38,353 --> 00:05:40,321
Yeah, but it's my house!
128
00:05:40,373 --> 00:05:42,173
Oh, I know, major.
We couldn't have it at my pad.
129
00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:44,275
Not with Daddy there.
130
00:05:47,046 --> 00:05:48,312
What's with him?
131
00:05:48,381 --> 00:05:50,147
Harold's on a hunger strike.
132
00:05:50,216 --> 00:05:53,901
What for?
No bread, man. No bread.
133
00:05:53,936 --> 00:05:55,570
[EXHALES]
134
00:05:55,721 --> 00:05:57,905
Say, listen. Uh, you've gotta
get rid of these people.
135
00:05:57,973 --> 00:05:59,006
I mean...
I'm not kidding.
136
00:05:59,074 --> 00:06:01,008
[BAND PLAYING ROCK MUSIC]
137
00:06:03,044 --> 00:06:04,945
[SHOUTING]
Hey, hold it down, will ya?
138
00:06:04,980 --> 00:06:06,814
[ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES]
139
00:06:06,882 --> 00:06:08,516
BAND:
? I know ?
140
00:06:08,584 --> 00:06:11,018
? You're so pretty ?
141
00:06:11,070 --> 00:06:12,937
? Temperature's risin' ?
142
00:06:13,005 --> 00:06:14,622
? On the city ?
143
00:06:14,690 --> 00:06:19,544
? And I'm cryin' ?
144
00:06:19,628 --> 00:06:21,128
? In the dawn ?
145
00:06:21,196 --> 00:06:22,864
Hold it. Please.
146
00:06:22,931 --> 00:06:25,299
Come on. Please.
147
00:06:27,837 --> 00:06:30,071
? I walk to the corner ?
148
00:06:30,089 --> 00:06:31,856
? Turn around Come back again ?
149
00:06:31,924 --> 00:06:33,691
? There's no place to go ?
150
00:06:33,759 --> 00:06:35,910
? No place I ain't been ?
151
00:06:35,978 --> 00:06:37,945
? In the city ?
152
00:06:40,993 --> 00:06:41,993
? Oh ?
153
00:06:42,017 --> 00:06:43,918
? Whoa, oh ?
154
00:06:44,019 --> 00:06:46,053
? Lonely city ?
155
00:06:49,274 --> 00:06:51,625
? I wander ?
156
00:06:51,694 --> 00:06:55,229
? I don't want the day
Turn around ?
157
00:06:55,297 --> 00:06:57,631
? Gimme that sundown ?
158
00:06:57,699 --> 00:07:00,067
? So bring on the sundown ?
159
00:07:00,135 --> 00:07:01,852
? Bring on the night ?
160
00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:04,973
? So I can lose myself ?
161
00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:08,109
? In the light of the downtown ?
162
00:07:10,362 --> 00:07:12,946
? In the city ?
163
00:07:13,048 --> 00:07:16,734
? Oh, baby
Lonely city... ?
164
00:07:20,706 --> 00:07:23,524
Hey, could you
hold it down, please.
165
00:07:23,592 --> 00:07:24,842
Ah. Heh.
166
00:07:24,909 --> 00:07:27,228
Fellas. Yes.
167
00:07:27,296 --> 00:07:28,296
Oof.
168
00:07:29,231 --> 00:07:30,231
[SCREAMS]
169
00:07:31,484 --> 00:07:33,050
Love.
170
00:07:33,152 --> 00:07:35,820
Love.
171
00:07:35,887 --> 00:07:37,021
Love.
172
00:07:37,089 --> 00:07:39,056
HIPPIE:
Man, that's poetry.
173
00:07:39,124 --> 00:07:40,825
Could you get him out of here?
174
00:07:40,893 --> 00:07:44,213
HIPPIE: Can't, man. Once he starts
meditating, there's no way.
175
00:07:44,563 --> 00:07:45,846
Love.
176
00:07:45,998 --> 00:07:47,866
Now, look, ladies.
177
00:07:47,933 --> 00:07:49,767
Oh, sorry. Um...
178
00:07:51,871 --> 00:07:53,905
Hey. Would you quiet down,
please?
179
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,406
It's my neighbors.
180
00:07:55,474 --> 00:07:56,474
You...
181
00:07:57,943 --> 00:07:59,677
Hey... Hey.
182
00:07:59,745 --> 00:08:01,479
Hey... Hey, could you
cool it? Cool it?
183
00:08:01,547 --> 00:08:04,081
Would you cut it... My neighbors
are gonna... Hey, would you...?
184
00:08:04,149 --> 00:08:07,351
Hey, man, don't spoil
my trip, baby.
185
00:08:07,419 --> 00:08:08,920
Fellas, please!
186
00:08:09,939 --> 00:08:11,990
Roger, remember
who you are, will you?
187
00:08:12,057 --> 00:08:14,191
What a great-sounding
garbage can.
188
00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:19,447
Hey. Suzie.
189
00:08:19,514 --> 00:08:21,182
Suzie, would you, please...
190
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:25,153
It is I, master.
Is this not fun?
191
00:08:25,220 --> 00:08:27,422
Would you take that
silly outfit off, please?
192
00:08:27,489 --> 00:08:30,258
Oh, but, master, it is my thing.
193
00:08:31,827 --> 00:08:34,329
[SHOUTING] Please, quiet!
194
00:08:36,515 --> 00:08:37,949
BAND:
? Bring on the sundown... ?
195
00:08:38,016 --> 00:08:39,333
[MOUTHING WORDS]
196
00:08:40,636 --> 00:08:44,705
? So I can lose myself
In the light... ?
197
00:08:44,773 --> 00:08:46,691
What in blazes
is going on in there
198
00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:47,926
in the middle of the night?
199
00:08:47,993 --> 00:08:49,627
Uh, going on, sir?
200
00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:51,930
I am waiting for an answer.
201
00:08:51,997 --> 00:08:54,198
Somebody should have warned you
before you moved in.
202
00:08:54,266 --> 00:08:55,299
Warned me?
203
00:08:55,367 --> 00:08:56,934
That you have
ear-splitting parties
204
00:08:57,002 --> 00:08:58,819
in the middle of the week?
205
00:08:58,821 --> 00:09:00,581
It's not here, sir.
It's the house behind us.
206
00:09:00,605 --> 00:09:03,140
Very noisy people. I've been
putting up with them for years.
207
00:09:03,208 --> 00:09:05,142
The house behind you?
Yes.
208
00:09:05,210 --> 00:09:08,112
Major, that horrible noise
is coming from right in there.
209
00:09:11,266 --> 00:09:13,186
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING
OVER SPEAKERS]
210
00:09:21,793 --> 00:09:23,794
An ice-cream truck
playing rock
211
00:09:23,862 --> 00:09:26,497
at 3:00 in the morning?
212
00:09:26,564 --> 00:09:27,932
I can't hear you, sir.
213
00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:31,135
Of course you can't hear me
with that infernal racket.
214
00:09:32,604 --> 00:09:34,405
I'm sorry, major.
215
00:09:34,472 --> 00:09:35,472
I think I picked
216
00:09:35,540 --> 00:09:37,942
the wrong neighborhood
to move into.
217
00:09:42,314 --> 00:09:44,098
Will you stop the music?
218
00:09:44,165 --> 00:09:45,466
Hey, will you...?
Fella? Hey?
219
00:09:45,534 --> 00:09:47,468
[LAUGHING]
220
00:09:50,456 --> 00:09:52,673
Will you stop the music?
It's 4... It's...
221
00:09:52,741 --> 00:09:53,875
Do you know what time it is?
222
00:09:53,942 --> 00:09:55,726
Will you just cut the music out.
223
00:09:55,794 --> 00:09:57,712
Ah. Oh.
224
00:10:01,116 --> 00:10:02,417
At ease, major.
225
00:10:02,484 --> 00:10:03,784
Thank you, sir.
226
00:10:03,852 --> 00:10:06,454
Dr. Bellows tells me
that you're an exemplary...
227
00:10:06,522 --> 00:10:08,523
[SIGHING]
...officer.
228
00:10:08,557 --> 00:10:09,723
Oh, Dr. Bellows...
229
00:10:09,791 --> 00:10:12,026
General Schaeffer wants
a chaperon for his daughter
230
00:10:12,094 --> 00:10:13,961
when he's away from Cocoa Beach.
231
00:10:14,029 --> 00:10:15,163
Oh, a chaperon, sir.
232
00:10:15,230 --> 00:10:19,133
You will escort Suzanne
to museums,
233
00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:22,703
concerts
and other cultural events.
234
00:10:22,771 --> 00:10:24,338
It will keep her out of trouble.
235
00:10:24,406 --> 00:10:26,574
Um, sir, I'm kind
of tied up in a project...
236
00:10:26,641 --> 00:10:30,378
And you will see that this
person never comes near her.
237
00:10:30,446 --> 00:10:31,479
Who is it, sir?
238
00:10:31,547 --> 00:10:35,383
It's a...
It calls itself Harold.
239
00:10:35,451 --> 00:10:38,086
It's a dirty, filthy,
disreputable hippie.
240
00:10:38,153 --> 00:10:41,489
And if he ever comes near
Suzie again, I'll kill him.
241
00:10:41,557 --> 00:10:43,458
Do you get the message?
242
00:10:43,525 --> 00:10:45,659
Yes, sir.
I get the message.
243
00:10:47,012 --> 00:10:49,213
Love.
244
00:10:49,281 --> 00:10:51,182
Love.
245
00:10:51,249 --> 00:10:52,350
Love.
246
00:10:52,434 --> 00:10:53,651
Love.
247
00:10:53,719 --> 00:10:56,586
Isn't it gassy?
That's Harold's latest new poem.
248
00:10:56,689 --> 00:10:58,155
Oh, it is beautiful.
249
00:10:58,223 --> 00:11:00,725
But... But do you not think we
should get him something to eat?
250
00:11:00,792 --> 00:11:02,259
He does not look well.
251
00:11:02,277 --> 00:11:04,511
Well, he punishes
himself for art.
252
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:06,914
I was just a square
until I met Harold.
253
00:11:06,982 --> 00:11:08,916
He made me what I am today.
254
00:11:08,984 --> 00:11:10,317
Love.
255
00:11:10,385 --> 00:11:11,385
TONY:
Jeannie!
256
00:11:11,386 --> 00:11:13,921
Love...
Oh, here we are, master.
257
00:11:13,989 --> 00:11:16,356
TONY:
Hi, listen, I...
258
00:11:16,424 --> 00:11:18,993
Maj, meet your new roommate.
259
00:11:19,061 --> 00:11:20,662
TONY:
Harold.
260
00:11:23,381 --> 00:11:25,833
Young man, would you...?
Would you just...?
261
00:11:25,901 --> 00:11:28,335
I don't want to interfere in
your private life, young lady,
262
00:11:28,403 --> 00:11:30,437
but, uh, your father told me
I had to chaperon you
263
00:11:30,505 --> 00:11:31,772
all over Cocoa Beach.
264
00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:33,908
Oh, that's groovy, maj.
We can double date.
265
00:11:33,975 --> 00:11:35,475
You and Jeannie,
and Harold and me.
266
00:11:35,543 --> 00:11:37,711
Yeah. No. Not...
Not Harold. He's out.
267
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,630
If... If your father even
sees you with Harold,
268
00:11:39,698 --> 00:11:42,100
he's gonna skin you alive.
And me too, for allowing it.
269
00:11:42,151 --> 00:11:44,835
No, I'll never give up Harold!
He's my guru.
270
00:11:44,903 --> 00:11:46,370
You're gonna have
to forget your guru...
271
00:11:46,438 --> 00:11:47,438
Master?
What?
272
00:11:47,439 --> 00:11:48,840
Master, the general
just drove up
273
00:11:48,907 --> 00:11:50,141
and I think he is coming here.
274
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:51,909
He's coming here?
In the kitchen.
275
00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:53,211
Are you sure he's coming here?
276
00:11:53,278 --> 00:11:54,578
Yes, master.
You're certain?
277
00:11:54,646 --> 00:11:56,047
In the kitchen too.
Yes, master.
278
00:11:56,115 --> 00:11:57,115
Harold, you get...
279
00:11:58,016 --> 00:11:59,283
Master! Oh...
280
00:11:59,351 --> 00:12:00,785
Oh... Oh, master.
281
00:12:00,853 --> 00:12:02,153
Yes, what day is it?
282
00:12:04,356 --> 00:12:06,323
Pick yourself up and act
like a man, will you?
283
00:12:06,391 --> 00:12:07,524
Huh?
Harold?
284
00:12:07,592 --> 00:12:09,312
I want you to get him out
of here. Will you?
285
00:12:09,361 --> 00:12:11,062
Quickly, get him out.
Uh... Uh.
286
00:12:11,130 --> 00:12:12,596
Do you understand me? Huh?
287
00:12:13,882 --> 00:12:15,616
Good. Good. In the kitchen.
Yes, master.
288
00:12:15,683 --> 00:12:16,984
Now, don't panic.
No, master.
289
00:12:17,052 --> 00:12:18,352
Right.
Ah-whoo.
290
00:12:18,420 --> 00:12:19,853
You are so clever, master.
291
00:12:19,921 --> 00:12:21,201
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
292
00:12:30,031 --> 00:12:32,511
SCHAEFFER:
Major.
293
00:12:33,335 --> 00:12:34,635
Major...
Major Nelson.
294
00:12:34,703 --> 00:12:36,470
Yes, sir. Right here, sir.
Oh, major.
295
00:12:36,538 --> 00:12:38,939
I just came over to tell you
that I am leaving town tomorrow
296
00:12:39,007 --> 00:12:40,007
for a couple of days.
297
00:12:40,008 --> 00:12:41,642
And, uh, while I'm gone
298
00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:44,829
I'm holding you responsible
for my daughter's welfare.
299
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:46,013
Yes, sir.
I understand, sir.
300
00:12:46,098 --> 00:12:49,767
And remember what
I said about Harold.
301
00:12:49,852 --> 00:12:52,220
Oh, you don't have
to worry about that, sir.
302
00:12:52,287 --> 00:12:54,121
You can count on... Aah.
HAROLD: Aah!
303
00:12:54,223 --> 00:12:55,822
What was that?
304
00:12:55,890 --> 00:12:58,509
Oh, I just skinned my knuckles.
Shut the door on my hand.
305
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:01,045
Silly of me. Don't you worry
about your daughter, sir.
306
00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:02,613
Uh, you can depend on me.
307
00:13:02,731 --> 00:13:05,282
I hope so, major.
308
00:13:06,518 --> 00:13:08,085
I... Uh... Uh...
309
00:13:08,153 --> 00:13:09,486
[GROANS]
310
00:13:11,089 --> 00:13:12,489
[GIGGLING]
311
00:13:13,792 --> 00:13:14,859
[EXHALES]
312
00:13:14,926 --> 00:13:15,926
Jeannie.
313
00:13:18,246 --> 00:13:22,315
That was the most transcendental
experience of my life.
314
00:13:22,384 --> 00:13:23,066
Oh, jeez...
315
00:13:23,218 --> 00:13:24,218
Jeannie did it.
316
00:13:24,285 --> 00:13:26,754
She just blinked
and you disappeared.
317
00:13:28,423 --> 00:13:29,556
Nelson.
318
00:13:29,641 --> 00:13:32,325
Oh, great guru,
tell us of your wisdom.
319
00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:34,161
Oh, how nice.
320
00:13:34,229 --> 00:13:36,631
Uh, yes, that's it. Uh, you see,
Jeannie is a student
321
00:13:36,698 --> 00:13:37,814
of Eastern mysticism,
322
00:13:37,882 --> 00:13:39,650
and all she had
to do was concentrate
323
00:13:39,717 --> 00:13:41,685
and just willed him
into the closet.
324
00:13:42,437 --> 00:13:45,222
[GIGGLING] Oh, master.
325
00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:47,408
I will spend the rest
of my life at your feet.
326
00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:50,046
Not here you won't. You're going
out in the back door this time.
327
00:13:50,078 --> 00:13:51,612
You're not throwing
Harold out, maj.
328
00:13:51,679 --> 00:13:52,914
Oh, yes, I am.
329
00:13:52,981 --> 00:13:54,648
This is my house.
Remember that.
330
00:13:54,716 --> 00:13:57,118
What would Daddy say if he knew
your girlfriend was a guru?
331
00:13:57,185 --> 00:13:58,719
[MUTTERING]
332
00:13:58,787 --> 00:14:01,104
You wouldn't do a thing
like that, would you?
333
00:14:01,173 --> 00:14:02,706
SUZIE:
Of course not, maj.
334
00:14:02,774 --> 00:14:04,558
Not as long
as you behave yourself.
335
00:14:04,593 --> 00:14:07,127
All together now. Love!
336
00:14:07,195 --> 00:14:08,195
Love.
337
00:14:08,196 --> 00:14:11,231
ALL:
Love. Love.
338
00:14:12,667 --> 00:14:13,834
Master?
What?
339
00:14:13,902 --> 00:14:15,035
How is this?
340
00:14:15,103 --> 00:14:17,120
That's terrible.
Come on.
341
00:14:17,188 --> 00:14:18,639
Huh?
We're late.
342
00:14:18,707 --> 00:14:19,590
Oh.
343
00:14:19,658 --> 00:14:21,642
[?]
344
00:14:21,710 --> 00:14:23,427
Huh? Wha...?
345
00:14:23,478 --> 00:14:26,038
Let's go, maj.
We're all set.
346
00:14:26,932 --> 00:14:28,432
[JEANNIE SQUEALS]
347
00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:30,001
What have you done to my car?
348
00:14:30,068 --> 00:14:32,503
Oh, I think it is
very artistic, master.
349
00:14:32,570 --> 00:14:35,339
Look at this thing.
It just...
350
00:14:35,407 --> 00:14:36,807
Look at this mess.
351
00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:39,243
We're not going anyplace
in this thing. That's for sure.
352
00:14:40,178 --> 00:14:41,962
Okay, I guess Harold and I
353
00:14:42,030 --> 00:14:44,565
will just have
to go call my father.
354
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:45,633
Get in.
355
00:14:50,672 --> 00:14:52,173
[CAN CLATTERS]
356
00:14:54,609 --> 00:14:55,742
[ENGINE STARTS]
357
00:14:58,847 --> 00:15:00,781
[?]
358
00:15:07,456 --> 00:15:08,622
BELLOWS:
Major Nelson.
359
00:15:08,690 --> 00:15:10,590
Oh, my darling master.
360
00:15:10,658 --> 00:15:12,226
Stop. Eh, Dr. Bellows.
361
00:15:12,293 --> 00:15:13,793
Huh? Oh.
362
00:15:13,862 --> 00:15:17,314
Major Nelson. What are you doing
in this ridiculous-looking...
363
00:15:19,584 --> 00:15:22,135
Oh, heh, heh. I beg
your pardon. I'm sorry.
364
00:15:22,203 --> 00:15:25,038
I... I thought
you were someone else.
365
00:15:26,024 --> 00:15:27,591
Peace, baby.
366
00:15:30,528 --> 00:15:32,463
[?]
367
00:15:32,530 --> 00:15:34,031
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
368
00:15:35,550 --> 00:15:37,134
Oh, well, excuse me, uh.
Yes, sir.
369
00:15:37,202 --> 00:15:38,369
Oh, uh, um, Major Nelson,
370
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:40,237
you didn't happen
to be in the neighborhood
371
00:15:40,305 --> 00:15:43,140
of, uh, Palm and Main Street
yesterday afternoon, did you?
372
00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:44,775
Uh, Palm and Main?
373
00:15:44,843 --> 00:15:46,110
Mm.
Um...
374
00:15:46,178 --> 00:15:49,680
Well, I... I saw this car
with, uh, "make love, not war"
375
00:15:49,747 --> 00:15:51,048
painted on it, and I...
376
00:15:51,116 --> 00:15:52,716
I could have sworn
you were driving.
377
00:15:52,784 --> 00:15:53,985
Palm and Main.
Is that right?
378
00:15:54,052 --> 00:15:56,753
I know it sounds
ridiculous, but, uh...
379
00:15:56,821 --> 00:15:58,222
[HORN HONKING] Well...
380
00:15:58,290 --> 00:16:00,858
ROGER:
Tony! Tony.
381
00:16:04,496 --> 00:16:05,596
Hey, Tony.
382
00:16:05,664 --> 00:16:08,465
The paint shop can't take
your car until Monday.
383
00:16:09,534 --> 00:16:10,534
Thanks, Roge.
384
00:16:10,535 --> 00:16:11,635
What'd he say?
385
00:16:11,703 --> 00:16:13,264
Huh?
Major Healey.
386
00:16:14,639 --> 00:16:16,489
Major!
387
00:16:16,557 --> 00:16:18,092
TONY:
I have an explanation, sir.
388
00:16:18,159 --> 00:16:20,828
BELLOWS: I'm sure you have.
I'm sure it's a good one.
389
00:16:20,895 --> 00:16:23,415
Now, Major Nelson,
I've got to find out
390
00:16:23,464 --> 00:16:24,965
what this is all about.
391
00:16:25,033 --> 00:16:26,233
Major Healey...
392
00:16:26,300 --> 00:16:27,885
Get this off me!
393
00:16:29,721 --> 00:16:32,089
"Make love, not war."
394
00:16:33,591 --> 00:16:35,726
What's the meaning
of this, major?
395
00:16:35,744 --> 00:16:38,028
Oh, general.
Uh, the, uh, this...
396
00:16:38,113 --> 00:16:39,963
Is this your idea
of a joke, Healey?
397
00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,365
Actually, sir, this isn't mine...
398
00:16:41,433 --> 00:16:43,200
Are you some kind
of an overaged hippie?
399
00:16:43,268 --> 00:16:44,968
Sir, actually, I'm one
of the youngest...
400
00:16:45,037 --> 00:16:46,437
I see that I'm going
to have to make
401
00:16:46,505 --> 00:16:48,339
some changes around here.
402
00:16:48,423 --> 00:16:50,090
That's fine, sir.
I'll be running along.
403
00:16:50,158 --> 00:16:51,158
No, you don't, major.
404
00:16:51,159 --> 00:16:53,294
No, I don't, major.
405
00:16:53,361 --> 00:16:56,630
I have a special little
assignment for you.
406
00:16:56,698 --> 00:16:57,882
Yes, sir.
407
00:16:57,883 --> 00:16:59,350
MAN [OVER RADIO]:
Roger.
408
00:16:59,417 --> 00:17:01,886
Oh. Oh, William,
you still awake?
409
00:17:01,953 --> 00:17:03,620
[YAWNING]I'm drifting off, Roge.
410
00:17:03,688 --> 00:17:05,022
Tell me another joke.
411
00:17:05,090 --> 00:17:07,457
Oh, yeah. Another joke.
412
00:17:07,525 --> 00:17:09,559
I'm running out
of elephant jokes.
413
00:17:09,627 --> 00:17:11,307
Let me see. What do you
get when you cross
414
00:17:11,329 --> 00:17:13,364
an elephant with a jar
of peanut butter?
415
00:17:13,431 --> 00:17:14,865
I don't know.What do you get?
416
00:17:14,933 --> 00:17:15,933
[DOOR OPENS]
417
00:17:15,967 --> 00:17:17,034
TONY:
Uh, Roge.
418
00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:18,102
Hey. Heh.
419
00:17:18,103 --> 00:17:19,203
I'm sorry about that thing
420
00:17:19,271 --> 00:17:20,771
with Schaeffer and the car.
421
00:17:20,838 --> 00:17:22,639
Oh, that's all right.
Nothing I'd rather do
422
00:17:22,707 --> 00:17:25,209
than sit up all night telling
Williams dumb elephant jokes.
423
00:17:25,277 --> 00:17:27,577
[YAWNING] What do you get
when you cross an elephant
424
00:17:27,645 --> 00:17:29,380
with a jar of peanut butter?
425
00:17:29,447 --> 00:17:31,148
I'd like to stick around
and help you out,
426
00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:33,583
but Suzie ordered me back
to the house in half an hour.
427
00:17:33,651 --> 00:17:35,052
What do you mean,
she ordered you?
428
00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,201
She's got me over a barrel.
429
00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:37,621
If I don't do
everything she says,
430
00:17:37,688 --> 00:17:39,489
she's gonna tell
her father about Jeannie.
431
00:17:39,557 --> 00:17:41,792
It could be worse. You could
sit here all night telling
432
00:17:41,859 --> 00:17:42,960
dumb elephant jokes.
433
00:17:43,028 --> 00:17:44,661
In fact, do you know
any elephant jokes?
434
00:17:44,729 --> 00:17:46,130
I really haven't
got time for it.
435
00:17:46,197 --> 00:17:47,697
I'll see you later.
You all right?
436
00:17:47,765 --> 00:17:49,199
Huh?
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
437
00:17:49,267 --> 00:17:50,550
What?
Just tell me any joke.
438
00:17:50,618 --> 00:17:52,186
Sorry, Suzie.
It's out of the question.
439
00:17:52,254 --> 00:17:54,488
Oh, but, maj, Harold won't
be any trouble.
440
00:17:54,556 --> 00:17:56,157
He hardly eats anything
and you've got
441
00:17:56,224 --> 00:17:57,424
plenty of room in your pad.
442
00:17:57,492 --> 00:17:59,043
TONY:
Absolutely not.
443
00:17:59,110 --> 00:18:01,245
Well, it'll just be
for a little while.
444
00:18:01,329 --> 00:18:03,397
Until we get married.
445
00:18:03,464 --> 00:18:05,499
Married? You and Harold
are gonna get married?
446
00:18:05,567 --> 00:18:07,201
Have you mentioned this
to your father?
447
00:18:07,268 --> 00:18:09,736
Uh-uh. That's what
you're going to do.
448
00:18:09,804 --> 00:18:10,937
Me? I'm gonna...
449
00:18:11,006 --> 00:18:12,555
My dear girl,
450
00:18:12,624 --> 00:18:15,024
wild horses couldn't get me to
mention Harold to your father.
451
00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:17,627
I think that I would rather...
? I dream of Jeannie ?
452
00:18:17,695 --> 00:18:21,498
? With the light blond hair ?
453
00:18:22,167 --> 00:18:24,017
[?]
454
00:18:25,687 --> 00:18:28,489
My daughter marry
an unwashed hippie?
455
00:18:28,557 --> 00:18:31,392
Are you out of your mind?!
456
00:18:31,459 --> 00:18:33,060
Yes, sir, I think...
I think I must be.
457
00:18:33,127 --> 00:18:35,296
He's not such a bad guy, sir.
If you'd just meet him.
458
00:18:35,363 --> 00:18:36,444
You know, just talk to him.
459
00:18:36,498 --> 00:18:39,032
Get out of here
before I lose my temper.
460
00:18:39,100 --> 00:18:41,735
Yes, sir. I wouldn't want you
to lose your temper.
461
00:18:41,803 --> 00:18:42,803
Wait.
462
00:18:44,839 --> 00:18:48,542
I have something for you to do.
463
00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:50,794
MAN [OVER RADIO]:
You're driving me up the wall.
464
00:18:50,862 --> 00:18:52,496
What happenswhen you cross an elephant
465
00:18:52,564 --> 00:18:54,431
with a jar of peanut butter?
466
00:18:54,499 --> 00:18:56,979
We're trying to remember...
We're trying to remember, Joe.
467
00:18:57,001 --> 00:18:58,134
Would you tell him the joke?
468
00:18:58,202 --> 00:18:59,603
We've only got
another hour here.
469
00:18:59,671 --> 00:19:01,004
Just tell him
the joke, will you?
470
00:19:01,072 --> 00:19:02,238
I don't know the joke.
471
00:19:02,306 --> 00:19:04,307
I don't even remember
telling him any kind of a...
472
00:19:04,375 --> 00:19:06,543
I'm so tired
I can't remember any jokes.
473
00:19:06,610 --> 00:19:07,378
Oh.
474
00:19:07,445 --> 00:19:09,213
Huh?
My poor master.
475
00:19:09,281 --> 00:19:11,048
Is there anything
I can do to help?
476
00:19:11,115 --> 00:19:13,750
Yes. Would you, please...?
Would you tell me what happens
477
00:19:13,818 --> 00:19:16,620
when you cross an elephant
with a... A jar of peanut butter.
478
00:19:16,688 --> 00:19:18,355
Oh, that is easy.
Yeah.
479
00:19:18,423 --> 00:19:20,724
You get a jar of peanut butter
with a long memory
480
00:19:20,792 --> 00:19:23,294
or an elephant that sticks
to the roof of your mouth.
481
00:19:23,361 --> 00:19:25,296
[LAUGHING]
482
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:29,366
[JOE SNORING OVER RADIO]
That was it, Joe.
483
00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:31,168
[?]
484
00:20:06,621 --> 00:20:07,688
[DOOR CLOSES]
485
00:20:07,756 --> 00:20:09,356
[YAWNS]
486
00:20:14,095 --> 00:20:15,596
[SNORING]
487
00:20:21,236 --> 00:20:22,636
Nelson.
488
00:20:22,703 --> 00:20:24,070
Nelson, are you in there?
489
00:20:24,139 --> 00:20:26,957
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
490
00:20:32,681 --> 00:20:34,214
[KNOCKING RESUMES]
491
00:20:39,854 --> 00:20:42,174
SCHAEFFER:
Nelson, open the door.
492
00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:54,854
[KNOCKING CONTINUES]
SCHAEFFER: Nelson.
493
00:20:55,603 --> 00:20:57,671
Uh, what?
494
00:21:02,026 --> 00:21:03,059
Oof.
495
00:21:03,128 --> 00:21:04,794
Major Nelson. Major.
496
00:21:04,862 --> 00:21:06,663
What is it? What... Whoa.
What took so long?
497
00:21:06,731 --> 00:21:08,432
I've been knocking
for five minutes.
498
00:21:08,466 --> 00:21:11,151
Uh, heh, uh, well, I was, uh...
499
00:21:11,219 --> 00:21:13,186
I was just trying
to get to sleep, sir.
500
00:21:13,221 --> 00:21:14,504
What are you doing?
501
00:21:14,522 --> 00:21:17,024
[YAWNING]
I was just stretching, sir.
502
00:21:17,091 --> 00:21:19,843
I was trying to wake up.
I've been asleep.
503
00:21:19,978 --> 00:21:22,259
Would you like a cup of orange
juice or a glass of coffee?
504
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:23,560
I don't want any coffee.
505
00:21:23,614 --> 00:21:26,049
I want a full report on
your assignment last night.
506
00:21:26,117 --> 00:21:28,185
Oh, my assignment.
What was I doing last night?
507
00:21:28,253 --> 00:21:29,334
Oh, yes. Roger and I were...
508
00:21:29,353 --> 00:21:31,233
Will you let that door go.
No!
509
00:21:32,657 --> 00:21:34,018
TONY: Ah, oh, yes, sir.
Let me see.
510
00:21:34,075 --> 00:21:35,392
Roger and I were, um, ah...
511
00:21:35,493 --> 00:21:37,160
We were working...
Harold!
512
00:21:37,227 --> 00:21:38,507
[CRASHING]
513
00:21:39,047 --> 00:21:40,364
Daddy.
514
00:21:41,832 --> 00:21:44,184
TONY:
Sir, are you all right?
515
00:21:44,219 --> 00:21:45,652
Harold's here?
516
00:21:45,670 --> 00:21:47,971
Ah, not here.
Ah, well, Nelson, I warned you.
517
00:21:48,056 --> 00:21:50,256
Where is he? I'll kill him!
518
00:21:50,258 --> 00:21:52,292
Not in here. No... Aaah!
519
00:21:53,595 --> 00:21:55,862
[?]
520
00:22:01,402 --> 00:22:03,036
Harold?
521
00:22:04,004 --> 00:22:05,238
How do you do, sir?
522
00:22:05,323 --> 00:22:07,524
I'm very glad to make
your acquaintance.
523
00:22:08,943 --> 00:22:11,695
That's Harold?
524
00:22:12,947 --> 00:22:15,048
That's Harold?
525
00:22:15,083 --> 00:22:18,318
That's Harold.
That's Harold.
526
00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:24,658
I do not understand it, master.
527
00:22:24,726 --> 00:22:26,392
After all the trouble we went to
528
00:22:26,460 --> 00:22:28,729
to get General Schaeffer
to accept Harold,
529
00:22:28,796 --> 00:22:31,932
Suzie suddenly decides that she
does not like him any longer.
530
00:22:33,101 --> 00:22:35,502
Well, I'll never
understand women.
531
00:22:35,569 --> 00:22:37,604
And that goes double
for teenagers.
532
00:22:37,672 --> 00:22:40,107
Oh, I feel sorry
for Suzie, master.
533
00:22:40,174 --> 00:22:42,054
Mm.
She liked Harold the way he was.
534
00:22:42,076 --> 00:22:43,076
Yeah.
535
00:22:43,111 --> 00:22:44,544
Perhaps I could blink
536
00:22:44,612 --> 00:22:46,412
and fix Harold's hair back...
No, no. Look,
537
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:47,714
I would need to...
don't do it.
538
00:22:47,782 --> 00:22:49,683
Jeannie, really,
don't do anything.
539
00:22:49,751 --> 00:22:51,384
Uh, I-if you're gonna
do anything at all
540
00:22:51,452 --> 00:22:53,693
I'd like y-you to fix it so that
she forgets she saw you.
541
00:22:53,755 --> 00:22:55,889
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
SUZIE: Hey, maj. Open the door.
542
00:22:55,957 --> 00:22:56,957
Huh?
543
00:22:56,958 --> 00:22:58,025
Oh...
544
00:22:58,092 --> 00:22:59,893
Now... Now you... You pop out.
Go on, get out.
545
00:22:59,894 --> 00:23:01,928
Oh, master, I like Suzie...
I know it, but get out.
546
00:23:01,996 --> 00:23:04,230
But your headache...
Don't come back till she's gone.
547
00:23:04,298 --> 00:23:05,532
All right. Forget my headache.
548
00:23:05,599 --> 00:23:07,433
Headache...
Just... Please.
549
00:23:10,738 --> 00:23:12,439
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
SUZIE: Hey, maj.
550
00:23:13,007 --> 00:23:14,007
[GRUMBLES]
551
00:23:17,194 --> 00:23:20,230
Uh, I'm sorry, Suzie.
I'm very busy.
552
00:23:20,298 --> 00:23:22,232
[ENGINE REVVING]
553
00:23:30,809 --> 00:23:32,743
[ENGINE REVVING]
554
00:23:34,345 --> 00:23:35,646
Meet Herman, maj.
555
00:23:35,713 --> 00:23:37,047
He's going to be
staying with you
556
00:23:37,114 --> 00:23:39,234
for the next couple of weeks.
557
00:23:41,235 --> 00:23:44,337
Jeannie! Jeannie!
558
00:23:46,691 --> 00:23:48,708
[?]
559
00:23:48,758 --> 00:23:53,308
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