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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,524 --> 00:00:06,789 - ♪ MTV ♪ 2 00:00:06,876 --> 00:00:09,357 [both chuckling] 3 00:00:09,444 --> 00:00:12,751 [rock music] 4 00:00:12,838 --> 00:00:19,454 ♪ ♪ 5 00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:26,852 [bell rings] 6 00:00:26,939 --> 00:00:28,985 - Two, please, for Escape from the Mummy's Tomb. 7 00:00:29,072 --> 00:00:30,639 - Oh, I'm afraid there's a minimum group size 8 00:00:30,726 --> 00:00:32,162 of four people. - Oh, no. 9 00:00:32,249 --> 00:00:35,513 Our girlfriends canceled. - Oh, yeah, that sucks. 10 00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:37,602 Well, you got ten minutes to make our next session. 11 00:00:37,689 --> 00:00:39,822 - Where are we gonna find two people in ten minutes? 12 00:00:39,909 --> 00:00:41,258 - And they've got to be really smart 13 00:00:41,345 --> 00:00:43,391 and good at solving puzzles. 14 00:00:43,478 --> 00:00:46,611 - Hmm, there's got to be somebody. 15 00:00:46,698 --> 00:00:49,788 - [chuckles] - Yeah, that kicks ass. Yeah. 16 00:00:49,875 --> 00:00:51,573 - Okay, so this is the four of you? 17 00:00:51,660 --> 00:00:54,141 - Yes. You guys are smart, right? 18 00:00:54,228 --> 00:00:56,708 - Uh, yeah. [chuckles] 19 00:00:56,795 --> 00:00:58,971 That's why you asked us to join you, m'ladies. 20 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,538 [both chuckle] - Smart. 21 00:01:00,625 --> 00:01:03,498 - Okay, now, remember, if you can work together 22 00:01:03,585 --> 00:01:05,761 to find the clues and solve the puzzles, 23 00:01:05,848 --> 00:01:08,720 then you might be able to escape from the mummy's tomb. 24 00:01:08,807 --> 00:01:10,026 It's down the hall to your left. 25 00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:11,941 We do take payment in advance, please. 26 00:01:12,028 --> 00:01:15,727 - Uh, we'll just go ahead while you ladies pay. 27 00:01:15,814 --> 00:01:17,468 - But afterwards, we'll split it four ways, right? 28 00:01:17,555 --> 00:01:21,124 - Yeah, baby. [chuckles] 29 00:01:21,211 --> 00:01:24,432 Did you hear that, Beavis? They want to have a four-way. 30 00:01:24,519 --> 00:01:25,998 - Whoa, really? [chuckles] 31 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:27,521 - That's right. 32 00:01:27,609 --> 00:01:29,393 We got to escape from the mummy's tomb, 33 00:01:29,480 --> 00:01:31,221 and then they'll see how smart we are, 34 00:01:31,308 --> 00:01:33,832 and then we will score. 35 00:01:33,919 --> 00:01:36,618 Uh, he said left, right? 36 00:01:36,705 --> 00:01:38,054 - Right, yeah, yeah, that's right, yeah. 37 00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:39,577 Right. [chuckles] 38 00:01:39,664 --> 00:01:42,319 - Uh, okay. [chuckles] 39 00:01:43,973 --> 00:01:45,408 - Huh. 40 00:01:45,496 --> 00:01:47,107 - So this is the mummy's tomb. 41 00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:49,196 - Whoa, amazing. 42 00:01:49,283 --> 00:01:52,068 It looks just like a bathroom. 43 00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:54,636 - Hmm, interesting. 44 00:01:54,723 --> 00:01:56,027 This mummy is trickier than I thought. 45 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,856 - [grunting] 46 00:01:57,943 --> 00:02:01,295 Butt-Head, it won't open. We're trapped. 47 00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:02,905 - Of course we are, dumbass. 48 00:02:02,992 --> 00:02:05,037 That's why they call it an escape room. 49 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:07,301 - Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, let's look for clues. 50 00:02:07,388 --> 00:02:09,259 - Exactly, Beavis. 51 00:02:09,346 --> 00:02:10,955 We will solve the escape room, 52 00:02:11,043 --> 00:02:13,872 and then we will solve the greatest mystery of them all-- 53 00:02:13,959 --> 00:02:15,439 scoring. 54 00:02:15,526 --> 00:02:18,616 - Oh, yeah, yeah. [both chuckle] 55 00:02:18,703 --> 00:02:21,576 - Hi, everyone. My name is Mary Katherine and-- 56 00:02:21,663 --> 00:02:23,055 - My name is Mary Katherine. [chuckles] 57 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,753 - And this is my college decision reaction video. 58 00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:27,147 And-- - I know my college decision. 59 00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:29,323 [chuckles] No. 60 00:02:29,410 --> 00:02:31,281 [both chuckle] - Yeah, no way. 61 00:02:31,368 --> 00:02:34,197 Absolutely not. 62 00:02:34,284 --> 00:02:35,459 Let's watch something else, Butt-Head. 63 00:02:35,546 --> 00:02:36,895 [all screaming] 64 00:02:36,982 --> 00:02:39,942 What's going on? [screaming continues] 65 00:02:40,029 --> 00:02:41,291 This is scary. 66 00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:43,075 Oh, fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 67 00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:44,468 - She's putting her in a chokehold. 68 00:02:44,555 --> 00:02:46,383 She's got a chokehold. - [screams] 69 00:02:46,470 --> 00:02:48,429 - Yeah, elbow her in the ribs, come on. 70 00:02:48,516 --> 00:02:49,908 Come on, grab her arm. Come on. 71 00:02:49,995 --> 00:02:52,737 You can get out of this. - Teach her a lesson. 72 00:02:52,824 --> 00:02:55,000 Make sure she never gets into Harvard again. 73 00:02:55,087 --> 00:02:57,655 [chuckles] 74 00:02:57,742 --> 00:02:59,048 - I don't know how you get into Harvard 75 00:02:59,135 --> 00:03:01,050 if you can't even kick your own mom's ass. 76 00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:03,008 Come on, come on. 77 00:03:03,095 --> 00:03:04,793 Her face is wide open. Come on. 78 00:03:04,880 --> 00:03:06,795 - Looks like the mom is gonna win this one. 79 00:03:06,882 --> 00:03:08,971 [chuckles] - There will come a day 80 00:03:09,058 --> 00:03:11,626 when you will defeat me, Mary Katherine, 81 00:03:11,713 --> 00:03:14,368 but today is not that day. [chuckles] 82 00:03:14,455 --> 00:03:17,197 Ah, ah! [chuckles] 83 00:03:17,284 --> 00:03:18,676 - Oh, my God. Oh. 84 00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:23,942 - [chuckles] - Uh... 85 00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:26,597 - Butt-Head, I think I found a clue. 86 00:03:26,684 --> 00:03:28,556 Check it out. There's words. 87 00:03:28,643 --> 00:03:31,907 - Hmm, words. Let's see. 88 00:03:31,994 --> 00:03:34,910 Jason...eats... 89 00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:36,781 balls. 90 00:03:36,868 --> 00:03:38,870 Jason eats balls. 91 00:03:38,957 --> 00:03:40,959 Hmm. - Huh. 92 00:03:41,046 --> 00:03:44,311 But what does it mean? - Who is Jason? 93 00:03:44,398 --> 00:03:47,836 Why does he eat balls? Whose balls does he eat? 94 00:03:47,923 --> 00:03:50,099 - Ah, the mummy's balls? [chuckles] 95 00:03:50,186 --> 00:03:52,188 - Perhaps. [chuckles] 96 00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:53,624 - Yeah, this is hard. 97 00:03:53,711 --> 00:03:55,322 Maybe we should ask those girls. 98 00:03:55,409 --> 00:03:57,237 - Beavis, those girls weren't even smart enough 99 00:03:57,324 --> 00:04:00,065 to figure out how to get in the escape room. 100 00:04:00,152 --> 00:04:02,067 They're gonna think we're geniuses when we get out. 101 00:04:02,154 --> 00:04:03,982 - Oh, yeah, yeah. 102 00:04:04,069 --> 00:04:05,941 Yeah, maybe they'll be dumb enough to score with us. 103 00:04:06,028 --> 00:04:08,683 [both chuckle] Yeah, yeah. 104 00:04:08,770 --> 00:04:11,251 - Oh, my God, are they still in the bathroom? 105 00:04:11,338 --> 00:04:12,687 - They're weird. 106 00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:14,254 They must be in tech or something. 107 00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:17,518 - Hey, is it okay if Kyle and Brad join your group? 108 00:04:17,605 --> 00:04:20,042 - Okay, sure. 109 00:04:20,129 --> 00:04:22,653 - This mummy forgot to, like, leave clues or something. 110 00:04:22,740 --> 00:04:24,438 - Whoa, Butt-Head, look. 111 00:04:24,525 --> 00:04:28,659 I found a clue. Look, a turd. 112 00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:31,836 - Hmm, now we're getting somewhere, Beavis. 113 00:04:31,923 --> 00:04:34,883 Finally, a real clue. - Yeah. 114 00:04:34,970 --> 00:04:38,843 - Now, why would someone put a turd in a toilet? 115 00:04:38,930 --> 00:04:42,891 Hmm. - It just doesn't make sense. 116 00:04:42,978 --> 00:04:46,068 Wait a minute. Maybe someone took a dump. 117 00:04:46,155 --> 00:04:47,852 [screams] 118 00:04:47,939 --> 00:04:49,637 - Damn it, Beavis, shut up. I'm thinking. 119 00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:50,942 - Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Sorry. 120 00:04:51,029 --> 00:04:54,163 - Beavis, you mean well, but you're a dumbass. 121 00:04:54,250 --> 00:04:56,513 [chuckles] I have figured it out. 122 00:04:56,600 --> 00:05:00,212 That turd can mean only one thing. 123 00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,563 This mummy is disgusting. 124 00:05:07,655 --> 00:05:08,873 [insects buzzing] 125 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:12,529 - Check it out, Beavis, another clue. 126 00:05:12,616 --> 00:05:15,924 - So what do we do with it? - Elementary, my dear dumbass. 127 00:05:16,011 --> 00:05:18,840 And now I shall solve the puzzle. 128 00:05:18,927 --> 00:05:21,016 [chuckles] Open. - Oh, yeah, yeah. 129 00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:23,497 - [grunting] Open, you son of a bitch. 130 00:05:23,584 --> 00:05:25,673 [grunting] - I think it's working. 131 00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:28,197 - Damn it. - [screams] 132 00:05:28,284 --> 00:05:29,981 - Give me my clue back, butthole. 133 00:05:30,068 --> 00:05:31,766 - Cut it out, Butt-Head. Come on, let go. 134 00:05:31,853 --> 00:05:35,639 [screams] 135 00:05:35,726 --> 00:05:37,641 Whoa, Butt-Head, you did it. 136 00:05:37,728 --> 00:05:40,470 - [chuckles] I'm smart. [chuckles] 137 00:05:40,557 --> 00:05:42,516 - Yeah, yeah. You're probably gonna score, too. 138 00:05:42,603 --> 00:05:46,563 [both chuckle] 139 00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:49,784 About to escape, yeah. [both chuckle] 140 00:05:53,657 --> 00:05:56,007 [groans] We didn't escape, Butt-Head. 141 00:05:56,094 --> 00:05:58,706 - Uh, damn it. [chuckles] 142 00:05:58,793 --> 00:06:00,577 - Yeah, and this tomb is even harder. 143 00:06:00,664 --> 00:06:02,710 There's no urinals. 144 00:06:02,797 --> 00:06:04,929 And what are these things? 145 00:06:05,016 --> 00:06:08,106 - Hmm, no human alive knows what these are. 146 00:06:10,065 --> 00:06:11,458 We must put them in the toilet. 147 00:06:11,545 --> 00:06:14,548 - Oh, yeah. [both chuckle] 148 00:06:14,635 --> 00:06:16,941 - How to make tattoo ink in prison. 149 00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:18,769 A soda can, some toilet tissue, 150 00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:21,337 some hair grease, and a saltine crackers box. 151 00:06:21,424 --> 00:06:22,860 Fold the tissue up and-- 152 00:06:22,947 --> 00:06:24,166 - Whoa, this guy is definitely a criminal. 153 00:06:24,253 --> 00:06:25,385 [chuckles] 154 00:06:25,472 --> 00:06:26,560 - That's what it should look like. 155 00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:27,735 - What accent is this? [chuckles] 156 00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:29,780 - Take your hair grease and fill up-- 157 00:06:29,867 --> 00:06:32,348 - It's like a prison accent. [chuckles] 158 00:06:32,435 --> 00:06:34,306 - I want to talk like that. [chuckles] 159 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,177 [Southern accent] Got some toilet tissue, 160 00:06:35,264 --> 00:06:37,135 saltine cracker box. 161 00:06:37,222 --> 00:06:38,746 Tear off three sheets of toilet tissue. 162 00:06:38,832 --> 00:06:40,182 - Twist it very tight. 163 00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:41,575 - [Southern accent] Twist it up real tight. 164 00:06:41,662 --> 00:06:43,098 - Light your candle and set your box 165 00:06:43,185 --> 00:06:44,882 over top of it to collect all the soot. 166 00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:47,363 - Set your box over top of it. - Set the box on two pencils-- 167 00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,757 - Set it on two pencils, so it can breathe. 168 00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:52,020 - After about an hour, you can see all the soot-- 169 00:06:52,107 --> 00:06:53,804 - After about an hour, you can see all the soot 170 00:06:53,891 --> 00:06:55,327 that's caught inside the box. [chuckles] 171 00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,025 - Scrape it into a pile. 172 00:06:57,112 --> 00:06:59,549 - [normal voice] This, like, makes me want to go to jail. 173 00:06:59,636 --> 00:07:01,986 - Add a tiny bit of hand sanitizer or body wash. 174 00:07:02,073 --> 00:07:04,554 - What did this guy do to get in prison, I wonder? 175 00:07:04,641 --> 00:07:07,078 - [normal voice] He didn't have to do anything. 176 00:07:07,165 --> 00:07:09,646 They just let him right in. [chuckles] 177 00:07:09,733 --> 00:07:11,300 - Yeah, they just looked at him and were like, 178 00:07:11,387 --> 00:07:12,997 "Sir, I can tell by looking at you 179 00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:14,782 "that you're gonna be in jail eventually, 180 00:07:14,869 --> 00:07:15,870 so let's just get this over with." 181 00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:18,394 [both chuckle] 182 00:07:18,481 --> 00:07:19,917 - Only a drop or two of water. 183 00:07:20,004 --> 00:07:21,266 - This is, like, a pretty nice prison 184 00:07:21,353 --> 00:07:22,746 he's in here, you know? [chuckles] 185 00:07:22,832 --> 00:07:27,011 - No, he's back at his mom's. [chuckles] 186 00:07:27,098 --> 00:07:28,883 - Yeah, his mom's gonna be like, 187 00:07:28,970 --> 00:07:30,667 [Southern accent] "Damn it, did you take my saltine cracker box 188 00:07:30,754 --> 00:07:33,061 and use it for your tattoo again?" 189 00:07:33,148 --> 00:07:34,715 - [Southern accent] "Damn it, boy, 190 00:07:34,802 --> 00:07:35,803 "you ain't never gonna eat chicken 191 00:07:35,890 --> 00:07:37,195 "in this house again you don't give me back 192 00:07:37,282 --> 00:07:39,459 my saltine cracker box." 193 00:07:39,546 --> 00:07:41,199 - "What am I gonna do if I kill your daddy 194 00:07:41,286 --> 00:07:44,202 "and have to tattoo a teardrop next to my eye? 195 00:07:44,289 --> 00:07:46,596 How am I gonna do that without soot?" 196 00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:48,293 - Every tattoo I have is that ink, 197 00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:49,686 and they're, like, ten years old. 198 00:07:51,775 --> 00:07:54,343 - Um, Butt-Head, I dressed up like a mummy like you said, 199 00:07:54,430 --> 00:07:56,040 and I still can't find any clues. 200 00:07:56,127 --> 00:07:59,391 - Uh, who cares about clues? 201 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,003 Let's flush this stuff down the toilet. 202 00:08:02,090 --> 00:08:03,613 [both chuckle] 203 00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:05,267 - Yeah, if we're gonna be stuck in here, 204 00:08:05,354 --> 00:08:07,138 we might as well do something cool. 205 00:08:07,225 --> 00:08:08,923 [toilet flushes] Yeah. 206 00:08:09,010 --> 00:08:11,012 - Congratulations, by the way. 207 00:08:11,099 --> 00:08:13,144 That's the fastest anyone's solved the mummy's tomb. 208 00:08:13,231 --> 00:08:15,233 What the hell? 209 00:08:15,320 --> 00:08:17,845 - Let's stick the plunger in the sink. 210 00:08:17,932 --> 00:08:21,239 [both chuckle] - Yeah, flooding is cool. 211 00:08:21,326 --> 00:08:23,154 - Oh, my God. What the hell? 212 00:08:23,241 --> 00:08:25,113 Who would do something like that? 213 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:27,550 - Check it out, Beavis, it worked. 214 00:08:27,637 --> 00:08:29,509 [chuckles] - Yeah, we're geniuses. 215 00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:32,424 - We escaped. - Yeah, this is cool. 216 00:08:34,164 --> 00:08:35,863 [car horn honks] 217 00:08:35,950 --> 00:08:38,212 Damn it, where are those girls going? 218 00:08:38,299 --> 00:08:40,389 - Uh, I guess we scared them off 219 00:08:40,476 --> 00:08:42,260 with our genius-ing or something. 220 00:08:42,347 --> 00:08:44,741 [chuckles] They just couldn't handle it. 221 00:08:44,828 --> 00:08:48,136 - [groans] Oh, well... [chuckles] 222 00:08:48,223 --> 00:08:51,139 I've been waiting to go to the bathroom for hours. 223 00:08:51,226 --> 00:08:52,488 Um, where's the bathroom? 224 00:08:52,575 --> 00:08:54,272 - Yeah, it's down the hall to the right. 225 00:08:56,927 --> 00:08:59,451 - Here we go. 226 00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,932 This bathroom is weird. [chuckles] 227 00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:03,760 - Yeah, I'm not gonna be picky at this point. 228 00:09:03,847 --> 00:09:05,196 [groans] 229 00:09:05,283 --> 00:09:06,502 Help me with the lid here, Butt-Head. 230 00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:09,331 [groans] - Unbelievable. 231 00:09:09,418 --> 00:09:12,290 Those two girls have no class. 232 00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:14,118 What--Hey, hey, what are you doing? 233 00:09:14,205 --> 00:09:16,512 - [sighs] That's better. 234 00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:18,688 - Stop, stop that! Stop that! Stop! Stop! 235 00:09:24,259 --> 00:09:26,348 [both chuckle] 236 00:09:26,435 --> 00:09:29,307 [rock music] 237 00:09:29,394 --> 00:09:36,010 ♪ ♪ 238 00:09:39,535 --> 00:09:41,189 - Hey, how's it going? 239 00:09:41,276 --> 00:09:44,801 Do you have any matches? - No. 240 00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:47,935 - How about a lighter? - No. 241 00:09:48,022 --> 00:09:51,547 - Because it says you have fire wings. 242 00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:52,940 - Get out of here, kid. 243 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:57,771 - Damn it. Fartknocker. 244 00:09:59,729 --> 00:10:01,426 [eerie music] 245 00:10:01,513 --> 00:10:03,907 Huh, let's go have a look. 246 00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:08,259 ♪ ♪ 247 00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:10,479 Whoa, fire! Yeah, yeah! 248 00:10:10,566 --> 00:10:13,351 Yeah, fire! Fire! 249 00:10:13,438 --> 00:10:16,441 Fire! Fire! 250 00:10:16,528 --> 00:10:18,618 ♪ ♪ 251 00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:20,620 - Hello, Beavis. 252 00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:23,492 I have been waiting for you. 253 00:10:23,579 --> 00:10:26,800 I am Fire. 254 00:10:26,887 --> 00:10:29,977 - Whoa, yeah, fire! Yeah, yeah. 255 00:10:30,064 --> 00:10:32,501 You, like--you kick ass. Yeah. [chuckles] 256 00:10:32,588 --> 00:10:37,071 - [chuckles] I have great power, yes. 257 00:10:37,158 --> 00:10:39,203 - Yeah, yeah. Wait a minute. 258 00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:42,250 So, like--so you can talk? 259 00:10:42,337 --> 00:10:45,557 - I have always been able to talk to you, Beavis. 260 00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:48,299 Remember? 261 00:10:48,386 --> 00:10:52,695 all: ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 262 00:10:52,782 --> 00:10:55,524 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 263 00:10:55,611 --> 00:10:59,267 - Beavis, it is I, Fire. 264 00:10:59,354 --> 00:11:03,488 Look upon my fearful glory. 265 00:11:03,575 --> 00:11:06,796 - Fire. [chuckles] 266 00:11:06,883 --> 00:11:09,103 Yeah, fire. [chuckles] 267 00:11:09,190 --> 00:11:11,409 Um, Fire, do you remember when I put an M-80 268 00:11:11,496 --> 00:11:15,500 in Mr. Anderson's mailbox and it started a big fire? 269 00:11:15,587 --> 00:11:18,982 - Yes, that was me. 270 00:11:19,069 --> 00:11:20,680 - Remember when I found my first lighter 271 00:11:20,767 --> 00:11:23,378 and it was, like, fire. Yeah. [chuckles] 272 00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:27,991 - I remember. I am Fire. 273 00:11:28,078 --> 00:11:29,123 - Have you ever been in a volcano? 274 00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:32,213 - I am in all the volcanoes. 275 00:11:32,300 --> 00:11:34,781 - And what about that forest fire? 276 00:11:34,868 --> 00:11:38,219 Yeah. - That was a great day. 277 00:11:38,306 --> 00:11:40,264 - Yeah, Smokey the Bear sucks. Yeah. [chuckles] 278 00:11:40,351 --> 00:11:43,964 - It's not his fault. I killed his parents. 279 00:11:44,051 --> 00:11:45,922 He's just trying to mend the hole 280 00:11:46,009 --> 00:11:48,272 in his heart that I put there. 281 00:11:48,359 --> 00:11:50,318 - You're cool, yeah. [chuckles] 282 00:11:50,405 --> 00:11:51,841 - Quite so. 283 00:11:51,928 --> 00:11:54,148 And you, Beavis, 284 00:11:54,235 --> 00:11:57,238 are my special one. 285 00:11:57,325 --> 00:12:00,807 - Fire, fire! - Fire. 286 00:12:00,894 --> 00:12:03,548 Now, Beavis, listen to me. 287 00:12:03,635 --> 00:12:05,812 I am going to command you, 288 00:12:05,899 --> 00:12:10,468 and you will do exactly as I say. 289 00:12:10,555 --> 00:12:13,994 - Yes, Fire, tell me what to do, and I will obey, yeah. 290 00:12:14,081 --> 00:12:16,083 - Very good. 291 00:12:16,170 --> 00:12:18,912 [laughs evilly] 292 00:12:18,999 --> 00:12:22,045 Now, Beavis, go to your school 293 00:12:22,132 --> 00:12:25,266 and run four times around the track. 294 00:12:25,353 --> 00:12:29,052 That will be one mile. 295 00:12:29,139 --> 00:12:31,315 - Um, that's what you want me to do? 296 00:12:31,402 --> 00:12:34,231 - Yes. 297 00:12:34,318 --> 00:12:36,451 - Okay, I guess that's pretty cool. 298 00:12:36,538 --> 00:12:38,758 Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna run, yeah. 299 00:12:38,845 --> 00:12:41,282 - Now, be gone! 300 00:12:41,369 --> 00:12:44,459 - Fire, fire! [chuckles] 301 00:12:45,895 --> 00:12:48,942 Yeah, fire. Fire, yeah, fire. 302 00:12:53,468 --> 00:12:56,123 - [sighs] Hey, Fire, I'm back. 303 00:12:56,210 --> 00:12:59,735 - Did you run around the track four times, 304 00:12:59,822 --> 00:13:03,347 completing a distance of one mile? 305 00:13:03,434 --> 00:13:05,872 - Yes, Fire, yes. I did as you command, yes. 306 00:13:05,959 --> 00:13:10,964 - Very good, my loyal servant. 307 00:13:11,051 --> 00:13:15,142 - So, Fire, um, why did you command me to do that? 308 00:13:15,229 --> 00:13:16,970 - It was good exercise. 309 00:13:17,057 --> 00:13:19,842 You needed it. 310 00:13:19,929 --> 00:13:21,757 - [groans] Well, I guess so. 311 00:13:21,844 --> 00:13:24,281 I don't know. I mean, if you say so. 312 00:13:24,368 --> 00:13:27,981 - Butt-Head doesn't understand us, does he? 313 00:13:28,068 --> 00:13:30,113 My special one, 314 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:33,987 what we have, what I am? 315 00:13:34,074 --> 00:13:36,032 - No, he doesn't. Yeah, he sucks. 316 00:13:36,119 --> 00:13:38,339 Yeah, let's burn him. Yeah. [chuckles] 317 00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:42,865 - Hmm, perhaps, in good time, 318 00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:44,127 but not today, 319 00:13:44,214 --> 00:13:48,740 for I have for you a second command. 320 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,177 - Yes, command me. 321 00:13:50,264 --> 00:13:52,788 Yeah, that first one was just a warm-up. Yeah. 322 00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:55,878 - Look around you, Beavis. 323 00:13:55,965 --> 00:14:00,230 The streets of the city are crawling with filth, 324 00:14:00,317 --> 00:14:03,581 but you and I know what to do about filth, 325 00:14:03,668 --> 00:14:05,583 don't we, Beavis? 326 00:14:05,670 --> 00:14:09,022 - Yes! Yeah! Yeah, fire! [chuckles] 327 00:14:09,109 --> 00:14:10,937 - I command you 328 00:14:11,024 --> 00:14:14,288 to pick up all of the plastic bottles in this alley 329 00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:16,290 and put them in the recycling 330 00:14:16,377 --> 00:14:21,077 and then the same for the surrounding streets! 331 00:14:21,164 --> 00:14:23,688 - Really? Um, you command me to do that? 332 00:14:23,775 --> 00:14:26,996 - Obey me! - Okay, okay. Yeah. 333 00:14:27,083 --> 00:14:29,390 Yeah, fire. Okay. 334 00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:31,566 Get this here. [chuckles] 335 00:14:31,653 --> 00:14:34,308 Get one of these. 336 00:14:34,395 --> 00:14:37,006 - No, not the regular trash! 337 00:14:37,093 --> 00:14:39,922 The blue one! - Okay, okay. 338 00:14:43,752 --> 00:14:47,016 [mellow country music] 339 00:14:47,103 --> 00:14:48,322 ♪ ♪ 340 00:14:48,409 --> 00:14:50,411 - Beavis, here's a little something 341 00:14:50,498 --> 00:14:53,718 for you from Cale Dodds. [chuckles] 342 00:14:53,805 --> 00:14:56,983 - Yeah, this is country, I can tell, yeah. [chuckles] 343 00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:58,985 - ♪ Down a two lane with no name... ♪ 344 00:14:59,072 --> 00:15:02,292 - I can tell because he said "down a two lane." 345 00:15:02,379 --> 00:15:05,121 - And there's, like, a story. [chuckles] 346 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:07,732 - I think that's the guy who makes "Family Guy." 347 00:15:07,819 --> 00:15:11,040 I didn't know he was a country singer, too, yeah. 348 00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:13,695 - ♪ I see you in a sun dress ♪ 349 00:15:13,782 --> 00:15:19,483 - Whoa, he's trying to score at breakfast. [chuckles] 350 00:15:19,570 --> 00:15:21,398 - Yeah, and didn't work, yeah. [chuckles] 351 00:15:21,485 --> 00:15:23,966 Well, you know, there's always lunch and dinner. 352 00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:26,577 - ♪ They're all coming ♪ 353 00:15:26,664 --> 00:15:31,147 - Uh, okay, he's like, "Okay, I can handle this." 354 00:15:31,234 --> 00:15:33,933 - Uh, hello, I'm country star Cale Dodds. 355 00:15:34,020 --> 00:15:36,109 I used to be a loser like you. 356 00:15:36,196 --> 00:15:39,851 Uh, I mean, not like you, exactly. 357 00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:42,289 - Yeah, you know what I mean, um, I was in a band. 358 00:15:42,376 --> 00:15:44,639 All the chicks liked me and all that, you know. 359 00:15:44,726 --> 00:15:47,903 - I was nothing like you. [chuckles] 360 00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:50,688 You're a loser. [both chuckle] 361 00:15:50,775 --> 00:15:54,301 He's like, you see, your problem is this sweater. 362 00:15:54,388 --> 00:15:56,303 - Yeah, just get rid of the sweater, 363 00:15:56,390 --> 00:15:58,435 and that chick'll come right over here 364 00:15:58,522 --> 00:16:01,047 and get it on with you right in the middle of Applebee's. 365 00:16:04,224 --> 00:16:06,313 - Uh, this is like all those movies 366 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,532 where, like, the good-looking cool guy 367 00:16:08,619 --> 00:16:10,665 teaches the dork how to score, 368 00:16:10,752 --> 00:16:12,754 and he, like, trains him. 369 00:16:12,841 --> 00:16:14,843 - Oh, yeah, yeah. [chuckles] 370 00:16:14,930 --> 00:16:19,021 - He's grooming him. [chuckles] 371 00:16:19,108 --> 00:16:21,458 - He's like, you know, now that I paid for your meal, 372 00:16:21,545 --> 00:16:22,633 why don't you come back to my place 373 00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:25,071 and try on some clothes for me? [chuckles] 374 00:16:25,158 --> 00:16:26,855 Yeah. [chuckles] 375 00:16:26,942 --> 00:16:28,683 - He's gonna wind up in a shallow grave. 376 00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:32,208 [chuckles] 377 00:16:32,295 --> 00:16:36,038 They told us about these kind of guys in health class. 378 00:16:36,125 --> 00:16:38,432 - All the warning signs were there. 379 00:16:38,519 --> 00:16:40,434 - They may come across as friendly at first. 380 00:16:40,521 --> 00:16:42,653 They might even sing you a country song. 381 00:16:42,740 --> 00:16:45,221 But beware. [chuckles] 382 00:16:45,308 --> 00:16:46,266 - They might buy your breakfast, 383 00:16:46,353 --> 00:16:48,181 but that breakfast isn't free. 384 00:16:48,268 --> 00:16:49,573 - Here's what happened to a young man 385 00:16:49,660 --> 00:16:51,227 who went home with Cale Dodds. 386 00:16:51,314 --> 00:16:53,403 [both chuckle] 387 00:16:53,490 --> 00:16:55,797 - ♪ The stars ain't started to glow ♪ 388 00:16:55,884 --> 00:16:57,668 - So, like, does this video mean 389 00:16:57,755 --> 00:17:00,541 that if you change your shirt, you'll score with chicks? 390 00:17:00,628 --> 00:17:02,195 [both chuckle] - Yeah, that's ridiculous! 391 00:17:02,282 --> 00:17:04,240 Because I have the coolest shirt 392 00:17:04,327 --> 00:17:09,028 you could possibly have, and I still don't score. 393 00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:11,595 - ♪ I like where this is going ♪ 394 00:17:11,682 --> 00:17:15,425 ♪ I like it, yeah, I like it ♪ 395 00:17:15,512 --> 00:17:18,993 - Uh, the only way he can score 396 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,821 is to go to a club and sit around 397 00:17:20,909 --> 00:17:24,217 and wait for a girl to trip and fall over. [chuckles] 398 00:17:24,304 --> 00:17:26,696 - Yeah, maybe I should try that. [chuckles] 399 00:17:26,784 --> 00:17:28,699 - As soon as the director says "cut," 400 00:17:28,786 --> 00:17:30,049 that hot girl's gonna leave the dork 401 00:17:30,136 --> 00:17:32,181 and go score with Cale Dodds. 402 00:17:32,268 --> 00:17:34,792 [chuckles] 403 00:17:34,879 --> 00:17:36,664 - And then the dork is gonna go home alone, 404 00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:40,233 put on a new shirt, and spank his monkey. 405 00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:42,235 - Now that's a country song. 406 00:17:42,322 --> 00:17:45,847 [both chuckling] 407 00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:51,983 - Um, okay, Fire, um, so I picked up all the bottles. 408 00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:57,206 - Very good. Very good indeed. 409 00:17:57,293 --> 00:17:59,513 [laughs] 410 00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,385 - Yeah, I guess it was fine. I don't know. 411 00:18:02,472 --> 00:18:07,608 - Beavis, are you ready to obey my next command? 412 00:18:07,695 --> 00:18:09,479 - Yes, Fire, yes! 413 00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:12,482 And something cool this time maybe. Yeah. 414 00:18:12,569 --> 00:18:15,616 - I think you'll find this very cool. 415 00:18:15,703 --> 00:18:20,055 You could say I was just getting warmed up. 416 00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:22,318 [laughs] 417 00:18:22,405 --> 00:18:25,408 Now, listen closely 418 00:18:25,495 --> 00:18:28,237 to what you shall do. 419 00:18:28,324 --> 00:18:31,153 - Yeah! I'm listening closely. Yeah. 420 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:35,375 - You will go and read "Call of the Wild" 421 00:18:35,462 --> 00:18:39,248 and write a two-page report on it. 422 00:18:39,335 --> 00:18:41,294 - Um, what? 423 00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:43,774 - Now do my bidding. 424 00:18:43,861 --> 00:18:47,561 Use topic sentences! 425 00:18:47,648 --> 00:18:51,782 - Um, Fire, um, why are you making me do this stuff? 426 00:18:51,869 --> 00:18:54,524 - You are my special one, Beavis. 427 00:18:54,611 --> 00:18:56,352 - Uh-huh. 428 00:18:56,439 --> 00:18:57,701 - And it's about time you applied yourself. 429 00:18:57,788 --> 00:18:59,138 - [groans] 430 00:18:59,225 --> 00:19:01,749 - It's one thing to screw around in middle school, 431 00:19:01,836 --> 00:19:05,622 but you are almost at the point where it counts for colleges. 432 00:19:05,709 --> 00:19:07,668 - Oh, boy. 433 00:19:07,755 --> 00:19:09,104 - Now go 434 00:19:09,191 --> 00:19:12,934 before I make it five pages! 435 00:19:13,021 --> 00:19:15,719 - Um, just wait here a second. Yeah. 436 00:19:15,806 --> 00:19:17,678 [chuckles] 437 00:19:19,723 --> 00:19:22,552 Um, did you know there's a fire in the garbage back there? 438 00:19:22,639 --> 00:19:24,250 - [groans] Again? 439 00:19:26,643 --> 00:19:27,557 - Yeah, there it is. 440 00:19:27,644 --> 00:19:29,168 - [gasps] What? 441 00:19:29,255 --> 00:19:32,780 No, Beavis, no. Stop him, Beavis. 442 00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:36,305 The pain! I'm being extinguished! 443 00:19:36,392 --> 00:19:38,786 Punish him that dare... [coughs] 444 00:19:38,873 --> 00:19:41,963 Oh, please. [coughs] 445 00:19:42,050 --> 00:19:45,053 It doesn't have to be two pages... 446 00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:47,795 just three paragraphs. 447 00:19:47,882 --> 00:19:52,321 [groans] Remember the M-80s. 448 00:19:52,408 --> 00:19:56,238 [groans] So cold. 449 00:19:56,325 --> 00:19:57,370 - Thanks, kid. 450 00:20:01,112 --> 00:20:05,508 - And there was so much left to burn. 451 00:20:05,595 --> 00:20:10,209 Farewell, my special one. 452 00:20:12,298 --> 00:20:15,953 - That fire sucked. [chuckles] 453 00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,304 Whoa, cool. [chuckles] 454 00:20:18,391 --> 00:20:19,914 Yeah, fire! 455 00:20:20,001 --> 00:20:20,915 [rock music] 456 00:20:21,002 --> 00:20:24,962 Fire. Fire, fire! 457 00:20:25,049 --> 00:20:31,926 ♪ ♪ 458 00:20:51,859 --> 00:20:53,774 - Chirp. 459 00:20:53,824 --> 00:20:58,374 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33162

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