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Comm's....... this is DS Haynes from Bristol and Avon,
I'm looking for information on an alias known as "The Dean".
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I'll call you back
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What's you thinkin'?
- She was thinking how she can save our lives
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by promising we'll pay every penny back in
eight weeks with interest
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washed and folded....that can't be done
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but you, you're a drug dealer you, your rich aren't you?
- Shut up
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You don't know me look around
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my crib is a garage at the end of my mom's garden
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You have things..... your TV
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those trainers, you could sell your car
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Hello Mr Dean, here's a second than Range and a flat screen TV
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we good?
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and I got family to provide for
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what I earn it goes to my Fam
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six is a lot of mouths to feed and are you forgettin'
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...feds nailed me for making you do my community service
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if they send me to pen and we aint paid
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The Dean will have his people inside do me a thing
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straight. you didn't save our necks
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You put 'em in a noose!
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maybe I can ask my parent's help
- they work in that kind of money?
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No.....but
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I dunno maybe they can raise it
- If we get them involved we make them complicit
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do you have a better idea then?
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yeah
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we go to the feds
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man I aint making no deal with the feds...
- what choice do we have?
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we lay it out there
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We tell the Feds and let them protect us
- Man I aint snitchin'
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It's better than digging your own shallow grave
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He's right, I have the number of a policewoman...
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we could call and then we can just finish this
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Hank
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HI this is Rani Rekowski
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Rani, how are you?
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well...uh...that's why I'm calling
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okay
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I just had something
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important I needed to tell you
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but I'm not sure I should be telling you
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on the phone
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What's this about?
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Rani you still there?
- Can you give me a second please?
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hello
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Rani what do you want to tell me?
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I wanted to tell you that I'm completing my payback hours
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and I'm staying out of trouble
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keeping me head down
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glad to hear it
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okay thanks
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Bye
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Rani?
- Comm's, you're enquiring about "The Dean"?
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yes, yes I was
- that information's classified
54
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you don't have clearance
- clearance?
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Thankyou for your enquiry
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Say something
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I say
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we don't pay call his bluff...boom!
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he knows where we live
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and my family and Ben's Sister....Boom!
- He's already threatened to hurt them
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same if we go to the police
- look we have
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eight weeks, you three have to get the money back
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I told you we've spent it - On what?
- The Bristol justice collective
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still don't understand what it is revolutionaries actually need
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by the way, apart from berets and some twat on a guitar
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New website, new minibus, new staff, new offices!
- fifteen types of milk propably
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Oh right and what did you spend yours on?
- I put mine into my business as you well know
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the one that you just got fired from?
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great save!
- What did you spend your cut on Frank?
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My Daughter's mortgage, it's killing her
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I had to help!
- So you haven't helped in forty years
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but you couldn't wait eight more weeks to grow a conscience?
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you guys are just gonna save yourselves
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and let our loved ones die?
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Christian Taylor
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What about him?
- If he has to do jail time
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for making Ben do his CS, he won't be around to run his drug operation
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we are not becoming drug dealers
- absolutely not
- I've done some grifts in my time, but not that
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tell me it isn't a good way to make big money fast
- Rani!
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It's eight weeks and then it's over
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why not
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cause drugs have ruined the lives of everyone I've loved
- no one is dealing
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drugs
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okay
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Geez I'll get another loan
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some how!
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alright then, just have to ask RG for the money back...somehow
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I'll see, I'll see what I can do
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Sir you wanted see us?
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How many times have you call comm's today?
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I haven't
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You?
- about five or six times
- but which is it five or six?
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six...
- twelve times, you've been red flagged
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red flagged?
- for pestering them about someone called "The Dean"
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even though you've been repeatedly told to stand down
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now stand down
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with respect Sir
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why am I'm being stonewalled
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now treading on Scotland yard's size tens
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"The Dean" is London big time, tied to international syndicates
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for two years the Met have been tracking him, building a case
- so why haven't they arrested him then
102
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he's got good trade craft never handles
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product or money directly impossible to pin him
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with anything
- we can help, he's running county lines into Bristol
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if that were the case the met would know about it
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would they? if The Dean's so careful
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and it's not like they show and tell with us so we wouldn't know
108
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what have you got?
- The Dean has a local foot soldier called Christian Taylor
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Taylor's about to do time for violating probation my hunch is
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if we can flip him, he could give us The Dean
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but my hunch is that you're ambitious and you think if you can
nail someone the met can't that's your ticket out of bristol
- I won't apologize for being ambitious, Sir
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but if we do land The Dean that's national news
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we all take a bow
- Now if you're snooping blows London's case
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we'll spend the rest of our days shooing seagulls of Bristol Docks
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Is that how you see your future?
- I stand by my partner Sir!
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just to confirm are you telling us to stand down Sir
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I'm telling you
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tread carefully
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I hope you know what you're doing?
I hate seagulls
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they're like rats with wings
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are you going to talk about it?
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Mmm?
- last night you walked out on our dinner party
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yeah sorry I had to Uh....
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pop but back to the office
- at ten o'clock?
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we've uh....stop doing that....look at me
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what is going on with you?
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I um....
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I realized
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you know I've been working this job nineteen years
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nineteen years because when I when I first started
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personal assistants we're still good secretaries
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you know you could still ask 'em to make you a cup
of tea and not wind up in a tribunal
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nineteen years I mean that is that is a lot of dress down Fridays
and and and signing birthday cards
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and that's why
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yesterday we decided that uh....
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I need a change
- We?
- Dan and I...yeah
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we..Uh....
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we talked it through and Um..
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I'm getting a new job
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I'm going to get a different job, a job that's
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For me - What job?
- I don't know yet I've got feelers out and I'm excited for this new chapter
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buzzing!
- you didn't think you ought to discuss this with me?
- I am discussing it with you, I'm discussing it with you right now
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this is going to impact us financially
- No
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School fees - No - the ski trip
- No...listen
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because I'm gonna take my nineteen years of management experience
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and I will breeze into another job
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John
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did your father fire you?
- What? no that's....
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ludicrous
- you can tell me if he did
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I would, he didn't, it was mutual
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listen listen I'm doing this
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I'm doing something for me..um for us..okay?
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I mean I thought you'd be happy for me
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you know I'm happy if you are
- well I'm happy
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so
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we're both happy
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what are you doin'?
- I've decided to give up booze
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but that's my booze and I haven't
- Greg while I'm living here I can't have any temptation around me which is why
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I need you to hide this for me
- What is it? flour?
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you're going gluten free as well
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That's cocaine
- Cocaine? what'd you buy the family size?
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look just hide it OK, whatever I say to you do
not give it to me no matter how much I beg you
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don't give in, okay
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Okay
- did you speak to my agent
- Yes
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and does she have a job for me
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No
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what nothing? no, no adverts, no sponsorship
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Greg I need some money you told me that I was going bankrupt
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I know but you're seen is unreliable since you called that soda machine
the "C" word - It was a Cunt
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other products don't want to be associated with you
- I'm etchy - No you're toxic - toxic's cool
- It used to be but now no celebrities need to see nice you've got show
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empathy and
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cellulite and also some people are saying
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what
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that you've got anger issues
- Who's saying that? I'll kill the fuckers
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there's also the substance abuse
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at which I am working on...look just gimme my Coke
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You told me not to
- that was before now I need a bump..give it to me
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you said whatever you say to me don't let you have it
- give me the bag
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you spekky twat, give it to me
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this is not where I used to be
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Yes it is you rake with a face!
- Aaahh not the tickling
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Give it to me
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don't, and I'll get you a job
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you said no-one would emply me
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give me twenty four hours and I'll find you something
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yeah come on please stay strong
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sorry for calling you a bug eyed bean pole!
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well, it was spekky twat and rake with a face
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either way, sorry
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I need a drink
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sorry
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Can I have a word?
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remember when you asked me
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where the cash for all of this came from
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I thought it was our mystery donor
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Yeah well if I tell you who it is, then..uh..you can't tell anyone
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It's Lady Gabriella Penrose-Howe
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that posh woman who's always falling out of nightclubs
199
00:12:17,060 --> 00:12:20,060
all right keep your voice down
- why is she interested in the BJC
200
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I thought her kind where only interested in
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bottle service and lip filler
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00:12:24,580 --> 00:12:30,380
well she deeply respects me and my organization
and she wanted to make a sizable donation to support it
203
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I misjudged her
- Yes you did
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but now she needs all the money back
- What?
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you know that anti gentry are like...
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fickle
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we've spent the money
- well we'll have to
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Unspend it
- we've got a year's lease on this place
209
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We have staff on payroll already
- you saying it like it's my fault we all voted for those things
- because you promised you could keep us financially independent
210
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that's why we turned down a council grant
- yeah and you're going to need to go to the council and say
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that we want the council grant after all
- that ship's sailed Myrna
212
00:13:01,940 --> 00:13:02,980
well, we can still get the money back can't we?
213
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we can er, sell the minibus
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00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:09,340
and er...those ergonomic chairs
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and I always said we don't need the rakey guy full time
216
00:13:13,820 --> 00:13:15,700
Myrna those are just the things you can see
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00:13:16,220 --> 00:13:19,020
We would have to liquidate the organization to get the money back
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the BJC will cease to exist
219
00:13:31,900 --> 00:13:33,860
Dad we're in here
220
00:13:34,420 --> 00:13:35,620
Margie, we need to discuss something
221
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you paid off the mortgage
- Ta Dah
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as of this morning and there was money left
223
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there was?
- so I set up a college fund for the kids
224
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Do the kids even want to go to college?
- I do
225
00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:56,860
it's Johnnie Walker Red that's your tipple isn't it?
226
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Mom's made your favourite too
227
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meat loaf
- well it's sort of shepherd's pie that i
228
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squeezed into a loaf
229
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it's the thought that counts
230
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well it's the deed that counts too,
thank you so much Dad
231
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It's the least I can do
232
00:14:12,980 --> 00:14:15,580
what was it that you wanted to discuss?
233
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nothing urgent
234
00:14:32,420 --> 00:14:34,620
My Halloran...hello
- Hello yes I'm here hello
235
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can I confirm, you said you're not currently employed
236
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is that right?
- I....
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..Um...I...I'm currently
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in between jobs yeah but as I said
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I I have
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nineteen years of of management experience and I'm
confident that I will find fresh employment very soon
241
00:14:50,940 --> 00:14:51,180
Yes
242
00:14:51,180 --> 00:14:53,340
I..I've checked with my supervisor
243
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but we can't grant you a loan, I'm sorry
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why not?
245
00:14:59,540 --> 00:15:00,380
You have no employment
246
00:15:01,220 --> 00:15:02,540
you're heavily mortgaged on your assets
247
00:15:03,220 --> 00:15:04,740
so, we just can't proceed
248
00:15:06,180 --> 00:15:06,820
I'm sorry
249
00:15:09,420 --> 00:15:11,500
Do you remember when banks like yours went tits up in ah
250
00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:14,860
2008 and it was taxpayers like me
251
00:15:15,100 --> 00:15:18,180
that bailed you out?
- No Sir, I was only six years old
252
00:15:19,700 --> 00:15:21,620
well it's absurd you know it's it's
253
00:15:21,660 --> 00:15:23,500
it's absurd that I'm standing here today
254
00:15:23,940 --> 00:15:27,060
and a businessman like me can't get a loan from your bank
255
00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:30,460
but if this was 2007
256
00:15:30,820 --> 00:15:33,340
and I and I was a, a unemployed single mother
257
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:37,380
with three kids and a crack addiction I'd have walked out
of your place with a mortgage
258
00:15:37,460 --> 00:15:38,820
and up fucking balloon
259
00:15:41,180 --> 00:15:43,580
is there anything else I can help you with today sir?
260
00:15:53,460 --> 00:15:55,980
like she said, we're only in it for eight weeks
261
00:15:56,380 --> 00:15:57,100
and then we're done
262
00:15:58,940 --> 00:16:02,620
Men like this guy from London exploit local kids I know that
263
00:16:06,180 --> 00:16:08,780
er..I'll get to know those kids and when this is over
264
00:16:09,180 --> 00:16:09,940
I can help them
265
00:16:16,740 --> 00:16:18,740
If I don't do this, people will get hurt
266
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:22,660
If dissolve the BJC, the community will get hurt
267
00:16:23,180 --> 00:16:26,180
forty years work wiped out, like that
268
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:29,380
and I would have killed and man
269
00:16:31,820 --> 00:16:32,460
for
270
00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:35,460
your whole life
271
00:16:36,300 --> 00:16:37,020
my life
272
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:39,520
for nothing
273
00:16:51,660 --> 00:16:55,620
If....we did do what you suggested
274
00:16:56,460 --> 00:16:57,260
how would it work
275
00:16:58,500 --> 00:17:02,060
What?
- the plan you suggested
- I don't know
276
00:17:02,180 --> 00:17:02,620
we'd
277
00:17:03,620 --> 00:17:06,180
meet with Taylor find out how he operates
278
00:17:06,260 --> 00:17:10,660
eight weeks, right, we'd just do
what is necessary and then we're out
279
00:17:10,820 --> 00:17:14,580
and absolutely no violance
- of course
280
00:17:15,500 --> 00:17:16,100
thankyou
281
00:17:18,860 --> 00:17:19,460
We're not doing it
282
00:17:20,420 --> 00:17:23,020
Do you all know what drugs have done to my Mum?
283
00:17:23,180 --> 00:17:24,900
I understand how you feel
- no you don't
284
00:17:25,220 --> 00:17:27,300
you don't or you wouldn't have suggested it in the first place
285
00:17:27,860 --> 00:17:30,900
I wish I didn't have to
286
00:17:31,460 --> 00:17:34,500
You have no idea, my whole life, you have no idea what
I've had to do to stop from going down that path
287
00:17:34,700 --> 00:17:35,940
What option do we have?
288
00:17:36,740 --> 00:17:39,300
we make as much money as we can in 8 weeks and we walk away
289
00:17:39,420 --> 00:17:42,180
a brief terrible episode in all our lives
290
00:17:43,380 --> 00:17:46,260
I'd never do anything to hurt you, but The Dean will
291
00:17:47,780 --> 00:17:51,420
I'm scared I'm really scared
292
00:17:52,580 --> 00:17:53,780
and I don't want to die
293
00:17:59,420 --> 00:17:59,740
Alright
294
00:18:01,620 --> 00:18:02,780
so we raise the funds
295
00:18:05,060 --> 00:18:05,820
how do we launder it?
296
00:18:11,660 --> 00:18:12,540
Guess who's back?
297
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:15,340
Oh it's not fucking Beryl is it?
298
00:18:17,020 --> 00:18:18,220
I hate that old bitch!
299
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:20,940
Greg, listen mate we need you
300
00:18:21,260 --> 00:18:23,060
I'm not doing any more money laundering
301
00:18:23,500 --> 00:18:25,900
I got really stressed last time of my eczema broke out
302
00:18:26,260 --> 00:18:28,620
I was scratching my groin so much I got thrown out of Nandos
303
00:18:28,980 --> 00:18:32,100
High pockets, we're all friends here that's why
304
00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:35,900
nobody wants to remind you about a certain cupboard of chaos
305
00:18:35,980 --> 00:18:38,940
which if exposed would leave you up shit
306
00:18:38,940 --> 00:18:41,460
creek with your dick in your hand
307
00:18:42,020 --> 00:18:44,620
ah...well actually my dick's already up shit creek in someone else's hand
308
00:18:45,140 --> 00:18:48,220
What's that mean?
- It means, a bloke who I work with called Spencer Fitzwilliam
309
00:18:48,260 --> 00:18:49,620
already found my cupboard of chaos
310
00:18:49,700 --> 00:18:50,940
and has been blackmailing me with it
311
00:18:51,020 --> 00:18:52,980
and making my life hell, so join the queue
312
00:18:53,660 --> 00:18:54,340
West Side
313
00:18:56,020 --> 00:18:56,700
West Side?
314
00:18:58,260 --> 00:19:00,180
leave it to me, I can change his mind
315
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:02,660
You take over?
316
00:19:03,380 --> 00:19:05,660
She serious?
- We need to make money fast
317
00:19:05,700 --> 00:19:10,580
you have a way of doing that but who's going
to run things for you when you're in prison?
- Not you - Oh, then who?
318
00:19:10,740 --> 00:19:14,260
because Soul just betrayed you, Spider's out of action
319
00:19:14,340 --> 00:19:16,620
now your whole crew's just some little boys on BMX's
320
00:19:16,900 --> 00:19:20,060
whoa whoa wait, we don't even know I'm set for a stretch
321
00:19:20,300 --> 00:19:23,580
you said this Laurie of yours is good right
- I didn't say was good I said
322
00:19:23,580 --> 00:19:25,940
he was free
- Nah I aint handing you my line
323
00:19:26,060 --> 00:19:26,580
why not
324
00:19:27,140 --> 00:19:31,700
because I don't trust you
- We're the only one's you can trust, have you ever heard the phrase
325
00:19:31,940 --> 00:19:36,740
the enemy of my enemy is my friend?
- was it the same guy who said how much wood would a wood chuck chuck?
326
00:19:36,860 --> 00:19:38,860
I spent my whole life trying to stay out of the game
327
00:19:39,540 --> 00:19:41,300
you think I want to be a part of anything you do?
328
00:19:41,820 --> 00:19:44,260
look we're all in this together whether we like....
- Naaaah G
329
00:19:44,420 --> 00:19:47,500
You do you and I take care of myself
330
00:19:47,700 --> 00:19:52,780
Oh..ha ha really because last night you about this close to
being dead before I stepped up and if you don't start trusting me
331
00:19:52,860 --> 00:19:54,780
none of us are getting out of the shit alive
332
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:56,620
What do you even know about running a line?
333
00:19:56,860 --> 00:19:58,620
Nothing but I'm a quick learner
334
00:20:09,980 --> 00:20:12,140
Square down you fuck me on this
335
00:20:12,940 --> 00:20:14,700
and I will Shawshank my way out of
336
00:20:14,740 --> 00:20:16,260
Pen so fast
337
00:20:19,020 --> 00:20:19,420
Aight?
338
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:21,980
What you wanna know?
339
00:20:23,980 --> 00:20:24,620
Everything
340
00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:29,180
Aight listen cos I don't like repeating myself
341
00:20:29,980 --> 00:20:32,580
you know what this?
- is it, is it a mobile phone?
342
00:20:32,740 --> 00:20:35,540
wrong, it's THE phone, the line
343
00:20:36,180 --> 00:20:38,420
contains numbers for all my customers
344
00:20:39,380 --> 00:20:41,140
so every day I ping out a message
345
00:20:42,140 --> 00:20:44,180
open for business
346
00:20:44,860 --> 00:20:46,220
all the time
347
00:20:47,260 --> 00:20:48,660
for what you need
348
00:20:49,380 --> 00:20:50,100
call
349
00:20:51,140 --> 00:20:51,700
the line
350
00:20:54,100 --> 00:20:55,340
Now what?
- we wait
351
00:20:57,220 --> 00:20:59,460
you making notes?
- Yeah it's just a lot...
352
00:21:02,620 --> 00:21:04,260
You keep everything up here
- Sorry
353
00:21:10,940 --> 00:21:11,780
Bill what you need?
354
00:21:14,020 --> 00:21:14,580
where you at?
355
00:21:16,820 --> 00:21:17,420
what you wearing
356
00:21:19,420 --> 00:21:20,260
Aight soon come
357
00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:24,900
So you take the order and then what?
358
00:21:25,620 --> 00:21:26,260
Then, important
359
00:21:27,260 --> 00:21:28,780
use a different phone to call
360
00:21:28,820 --> 00:21:30,500
whatever runner you think is closest
361
00:21:34,620 --> 00:21:37,580
Yo Bigs, one bag of beans Elswick Road
362
00:21:38,260 --> 00:21:40,100
the guys wearing a navy blue tracksuit
363
00:21:40,780 --> 00:21:41,380
you got that?
364
00:21:43,460 --> 00:21:43,820
Aight!
365
00:21:45,020 --> 00:21:46,580
and bingo was his name Yo?
366
00:21:48,060 --> 00:21:49,460
Could we meet some of the runners?
367
00:21:55,380 --> 00:21:56,100
What's he doing here?
368
00:21:57,100 --> 00:21:58,500
This is our business adviser
369
00:22:34,860 --> 00:22:36,020
There's some of my runners
370
00:22:37,500 --> 00:22:39,380
Jesus they look barely out of nappies
371
00:22:40,500 --> 00:22:44,140
I recognize that blonde girl, she goes to school with my sister
372
00:22:45,100 --> 00:22:50,380
Aaah this is so wrong man
- Don't judge, they're only doing it to feed their family same as me
373
00:22:52,780 --> 00:22:53,460
What are you doing?
374
00:22:54,380 --> 00:22:57,340
Never exit the vehicle, basics
- Mmm basics
375
00:23:00,340 --> 00:23:04,460
okay so Um, how much does a runner get paid
376
00:23:04,860 --> 00:23:05,700
About 80 quid
377
00:23:06,700 --> 00:23:07,300
Standard?
378
00:23:08,180 --> 00:23:10,340
For everybody?
- Depends how much they sell
379
00:23:10,820 --> 00:23:12,700
or if they owe money that's set against that
380
00:23:18,340 --> 00:23:20,780
Yo man pulled up, send them away and come here innit
381
00:23:21,780 --> 00:23:23,780
What are we doing?
- We're doing what we have to do
382
00:23:23,820 --> 00:23:25,100
what what what is happening?
383
00:23:25,780 --> 00:23:26,540
Hey you lot, piss off
384
00:23:28,020 --> 00:23:29,860
The boy who just left took the food
385
00:23:30,180 --> 00:23:33,380
So if there's Feds watching they can't link shit directly to me
386
00:23:36,460 --> 00:23:38,500
What you saying big man, alright Yo
387
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:40,260
Comes too
388
00:23:40,980 --> 00:23:50,860
Anyone complainin' about the quality of the food?
- No Cuz
389
00:23:51,500 --> 00:23:54,620
OK.. I think I can get the, the business side of things
down but that dialect?
390
00:23:55,380 --> 00:23:57,860
It's going to take a bit of work
- Anyone watching you? - Nah Man
391
00:23:58,220 --> 00:24:01,580
Anyone on selling?
- Nah - No trouble?
392
00:24:02,420 --> 00:24:03,460
MMMmmmm mmm
- Nah? - Nah man
393
00:24:07,220 --> 00:24:10,780
Four? There should be five?
- Bro we sold four hundred
394
00:24:12,100 --> 00:24:12,900
Yo big man
395
00:24:14,380 --> 00:24:16,900
You know what happens if you start lyin' to me right?
396
00:24:17,420 --> 00:24:18,980
Yeah I do Bro and I aint lyin'
- Yeah?
397
00:24:22,020 --> 00:24:22,580
In a bit
398
00:24:23,460 --> 00:24:26,420
What was that about?
399
00:24:28,180 --> 00:24:28,700
Nothing.
400
00:24:29,540 --> 00:24:31,740
You got to make 'em sweat every now and then innit
401
00:24:32,180 --> 00:24:33,740
Uumm what if he had been lying?
402
00:24:34,940 --> 00:24:35,620
Trust me
403
00:24:36,340 --> 00:24:37,420
He knows better than that
404
00:24:46,020 --> 00:24:49,460
You've never seen jaws?
- No, I've never seen Jaws
405
00:24:50,100 --> 00:24:51,500
I've have seen Jaws 2, 3 and 4 though
- Oh
406
00:24:52,820 --> 00:24:53,900
Chuck Tide's out
407
00:24:55,300 --> 00:24:56,300
We take it turns
408
00:25:19,780 --> 00:25:22,220
So how do you manage, ah staffing levels?
409
00:25:22,420 --> 00:25:24,060
I only take on people when demand is
410
00:25:24,060 --> 00:25:27,980
steady otherwise you're just paying for employees when you don't need them
411
00:25:28,500 --> 00:25:28,860
yeah, good
412
00:25:29,940 --> 00:25:30,940
Yeah I wish I'd done that
413
00:25:32,020 --> 00:25:33,260
You've quite the business brain
414
00:25:34,020 --> 00:25:35,380
You pick it all up on the street?
415
00:25:35,620 --> 00:25:36,060
yeah
416
00:25:36,940 --> 00:25:38,220
Oxford was full innit!
417
00:25:40,340 --> 00:25:42,380
So what have your net profits been over the last Um..
418
00:25:42,580 --> 00:25:45,020
three years?
- I've been even at two hundred K
419
00:25:46,900 --> 00:25:48,420
OK...the business isn't growing though is it?
420
00:25:48,980 --> 00:25:50,740
you know they say that a business that isn't
421
00:25:50,860 --> 00:25:52,460
progressing is regressing
422
00:25:53,300 --> 00:25:54,740
that's the big mistake I made
423
00:25:54,980 --> 00:25:55,820
Yeah I know dat!
424
00:25:56,860 --> 00:26:00,020
I need to mix it up man
- Can't you move into other markets
425
00:26:00,140 --> 00:26:03,620
I can't just pick and drop my runners off in another part of Bristol
426
00:26:03,820 --> 00:26:05,180
that's where the problems start
427
00:26:06,060 --> 00:26:07,340
Well you're definitely a natural
428
00:26:08,100 --> 00:26:11,420
You ever think about legitimate work?
I think you'd ah, go places
429
00:26:31,540 --> 00:26:32,220
Is it safe?
430
00:26:32,820 --> 00:26:34,740
What?
431
00:26:36,380 --> 00:26:37,260
Is it safe?
432
00:26:40,140 --> 00:26:43,300
Is what safe?
- Special agent Robert Stack
433
00:26:44,740 --> 00:26:45,660
Federal Bureau
434
00:26:46,540 --> 00:26:47,540
of Investigation
435
00:26:48,540 --> 00:26:51,660
Oh. V-funny chap but you're a bit old to be a stripogram
436
00:26:52,500 --> 00:26:53,540
how much are the Lads paying you?
437
00:26:54,660 --> 00:26:56,260
Your name is Spencer FitzWilliam
438
00:26:56,500 --> 00:26:59,380
You're a lawyer Northcott Mauling correct?
439
00:26:59,940 --> 00:27:03,700
What's this about?
- On three, leave your wrap
440
00:27:03,940 --> 00:27:05,180
on the bench, stand
441
00:27:05,940 --> 00:27:06,620
and follow me
442
00:27:07,140 --> 00:27:07,500
One
443
00:27:08,340 --> 00:27:08,660
2
Two
444
00:27:10,180 --> 00:27:13,220
Three
- Can I see your badge again?
445
00:27:13,660 --> 00:27:17,220
We need to talk about THE biggest coordinated response
446
00:27:17,260 --> 00:27:19,220
to international money laundering in
447
00:27:19,780 --> 00:27:23,140
the FBI history - money laundering?
- Keep your goddam voice down - come on
448
00:27:23,180 --> 00:27:25,540
chuck is this a joke?
- Joke? See that guy?
449
00:27:26,060 --> 00:27:27,940
that's my colleague Agent Jack Webb
450
00:27:28,820 --> 00:27:31,100
he spent two years traveling
451
00:27:31,260 --> 00:27:35,180
across four continents tracing corrupt bankers a bogus cunts
452
00:27:35,260 --> 00:27:36,980
with ties to organized crime, Agent Webb
453
00:27:37,180 --> 00:27:39,340
missed his own mother's funeral
454
00:27:40,260 --> 00:27:42,180
ask Agent Webb if this is a joke
455
00:27:42,460 --> 00:27:45,740
What's this got to do with me?
- Your firm has been compromised
456
00:27:46,420 --> 00:27:46,980
are you clean?
457
00:27:47,780 --> 00:27:49,900
Am I what? - Are you clean?
- Yeah yeah, I'm clean
458
00:27:50,820 --> 00:27:52,700
You're impeding an investigation
459
00:27:53,860 --> 00:27:54,380
I...I'm not
460
00:27:55,140 --> 00:28:00,540
We have the cooperation of an informant in your office,
he's been collating paperwork as part of our
461
00:28:00,580 --> 00:28:03,820
evidence. I believe that paperwork is now in your possession
462
00:28:06,420 --> 00:28:08,900
Greg Greg Greg's a mole for the FBI?
463
00:28:09,180 --> 00:28:12,020
Keep your goddam voice down never say that out loud again
464
00:28:12,300 --> 00:28:14,060
Who put you up to this was it Grunter, or Nadger?
465
00:28:14,260 --> 00:28:15,980
I bet it was Nadger wasn't it?
466
00:28:16,060 --> 00:28:20,340
Sometime soon law enforcement will be walking into your place of work
467
00:28:20,860 --> 00:28:23,300
and marching your people out in handcuffs
468
00:28:24,620 --> 00:28:26,380
ask me again if I'm joking
469
00:28:29,580 --> 00:28:32,700
Where's the paperwork?
- yeah, yes - Do you speak english?
470
00:28:32,780 --> 00:28:35,300
yes yes - where's the paperwork?
- It's in my car
471
00:28:35,620 --> 00:28:36,500
Easy, let's go
- OK
472
00:28:38,740 --> 00:28:42,020
Rita, knock knock - Greg!
- I wonder if I can have a quick
473
00:28:42,100 --> 00:28:45,020
chat with you about a hypothetical HR scenario
474
00:28:45,180 --> 00:28:48,100
Uumm, I'm actually on my lunch hour at the moment, Greg
475
00:28:48,940 --> 00:28:49,500
Um
- I can come back
476
00:28:50,380 --> 00:28:52,820
No it's fine, HR is always open!
- Oh thank you, thank you!
477
00:28:53,740 --> 00:28:57,260
come on in - Um - would you mind just sitting
down there please Greg because it's a bit....
478
00:28:58,100 --> 00:29:00,460
looming over me like a ghost
- Yeah sorry
479
00:29:01,380 --> 00:29:02,780
Yeah I'm just wondering if,
480
00:29:03,540 --> 00:29:04,860
hypothetically a gentleman, you know,
481
00:29:05,220 --> 00:29:08,340
who who who works in the office has had conversations with
482
00:29:08,860 --> 00:29:10,460
a woman who also works in the office
483
00:29:10,540 --> 00:29:13,500
OK, work conversations or?
- Sometimes work
484
00:29:13,660 --> 00:29:15,860
you know but ah they're just general chit-chat
485
00:29:16,420 --> 00:29:17,940
About what?
- weather
486
00:29:18,940 --> 00:29:20,260
rambling in the peak district
487
00:29:21,100 --> 00:29:22,300
Roger Federer's thighs
488
00:29:23,220 --> 00:29:25,700
Where have these conversations taken place please?
489
00:29:25,780 --> 00:29:28,540
Different places Um, lift, kitchen
490
00:29:29,140 --> 00:29:31,220
sometimes at the woman's desk
- OK
491
00:29:31,860 --> 00:29:35,580
Has the er gentleman in question... perched?
492
00:29:35,700 --> 00:29:38,380
on the lady's desk at any point?
- ah, there might have been a perch
- MMmm MMmm
493
00:29:39,420 --> 00:29:41,620
Just hop up there for me a moment would you please
494
00:29:46,060 --> 00:29:47,740
right, so you can see what's, what's happening here?
495
00:29:49,540 --> 00:29:52,820
What's happening?
- what the lady's having to look at when the gentleman sit's like that at her desk
496
00:29:53,140 --> 00:29:55,340
The gentleman's groin is
497
00:29:56,100 --> 00:29:57,180
at the lady's eye level....OK
498
00:30:00,340 --> 00:30:01,460
pop yourself back down please Greg
499
00:30:01,500 --> 00:30:04,500
This is ringing a lot of alarm bells....Um
500
00:30:05,340 --> 00:30:08,460
is the Gentleman's superior to the Lady?
- No he's got very low self esteem
501
00:30:08,500 --> 00:30:10,700
No I mean in job title or or rank
502
00:30:10,780 --> 00:30:13,540
Oh well he's marginally superior I think
- right
503
00:30:13,860 --> 00:30:14,140
Yeah...
504
00:30:15,500 --> 00:30:16,740
That will put him in the red zone
505
00:30:18,540 --> 00:30:22,660
And what is a red zone?
- The red zone is where HR would have to consider the man's position
506
00:30:22,740 --> 00:30:23,940
Oh wow, blimey
507
00:30:25,060 --> 00:30:31,660
Just to be totally clear, hypothetically the men couldn't make any kind of overture
to the woman?
- What in the hope of a sexual relationship or?
508
00:30:31,700 --> 00:30:32,220
Yes please!
- No absolutely not, No
509
00:30:33,020 --> 00:30:35,900
So he couldn't say um, ask her out for a drink or anything?
510
00:30:36,180 --> 00:30:38,660
No no definitely not......if this guy
511
00:30:39,060 --> 00:30:41,940
works here which it sounds like he does, whoever he may be
512
00:30:42,660 --> 00:30:45,220
then he will have read our company policy on sexual
513
00:30:45,260 --> 00:30:46,580
and romantic relationships
514
00:30:46,900 --> 00:30:51,180
What if he started reading that and he found it a bit heavy
going so instead he watched some golfing bloopers on YouTube?
515
00:30:51,820 --> 00:30:53,180
Well then he won't know that even
516
00:30:53,220 --> 00:30:58,020
consensual relationships between colleagues
can lead to disciplinary reaction or dismissal
517
00:30:58,580 --> 00:30:59,220
Dismissal?
518
00:31:00,100 --> 00:31:05,220
Hi Greg I'm grabbing a sandwich do you want one?
- No
519
00:31:09,980 --> 00:31:11,220
This is all of it?
- Yeah
520
00:31:12,340 --> 00:31:15,980
I assume I don't need to tell you that everything I've said
521
00:31:16,460 --> 00:31:20,140
is confidential, don't even discuss it with Greg the lurch!
522
00:31:20,340 --> 00:31:22,260
Look you've got them now so come on tell me if this
523
00:31:22,700 --> 00:31:25,020
real or what?
- Stay in Greg Dillard's good books though...
524
00:31:25,100 --> 00:31:25,500
cos, if
525
00:31:26,260 --> 00:31:27,620
the shit hits the fan
526
00:31:28,260 --> 00:31:29,940
and he starts pointing fingers
527
00:31:31,020 --> 00:31:32,780
you don't want him pointing at you
528
00:31:33,700 --> 00:31:37,220
Now, you need to call me a cab
529
00:31:38,620 --> 00:31:39,860
Yes, yeah of course
530
00:31:40,860 --> 00:31:44,100
Do you want, Um, an Uber XL or Lux?
531
00:31:45,580 --> 00:31:46,420
that be a Lux yeah
532
00:31:47,180 --> 00:31:48,180
A bit nicer for you
533
00:31:50,020 --> 00:31:50,780
7 minutes
534
00:31:52,420 --> 00:31:55,780
I aint pleading guilty Bro
- Then you'll do twice the prison time
535
00:31:55,860 --> 00:31:59,020
Listen, I got too much stuff going on right now to be sittin' in a prison cell
536
00:31:59,100 --> 00:32:01,980
You violated your probation you're going down there's nothing I can do about that
537
00:32:02,300 --> 00:32:04,140
what I can do is reduce the amount of time you do
538
00:32:04,220 --> 00:32:04,620
Tea?
539
00:32:05,380 --> 00:32:07,100
Can I make you one in a minute? I'm just in the middle of something
540
00:32:07,460 --> 00:32:09,660
Sorry I'm asking would you like a cup of tea?
541
00:32:10,940 --> 00:32:11,380
Yes please
542
00:32:11,860 --> 00:32:13,020
Pleasure chap, would you like one?
543
00:32:14,180 --> 00:32:15,060
Got any Ginseng?
544
00:32:20,180 --> 00:32:23,180
Alright so how long am I looking at if I plead not guilty
545
00:32:23,340 --> 00:32:27,780
A year maybe two, but plead guilty and I can get that down to a few months
- A few months?
546
00:32:28,660 --> 00:32:31,020
What kind of waste man lawyer are you?
547
00:32:31,260 --> 00:32:35,260
Bad news, no Ginseng but do have
548
00:32:35,340 --> 00:32:39,020
Mint, Green, Lapsang Souchong, Oolong
549
00:32:39,420 --> 00:32:41,100
or lemon ginger and Manuka honey
550
00:32:43,660 --> 00:32:44,460
Surprise me
551
00:32:45,060 --> 00:32:45,900
biscuit? biscuit?
552
00:32:46,540 --> 00:32:47,140
I'll have a biscuit
553
00:32:48,060 --> 00:32:50,260
Nah I'm good Bro
- One biscuit for Greg-O-Laughs
554
00:32:50,300 --> 00:32:50,940
My liege
555
00:32:57,060 --> 00:32:57,780
So what you gonna do?
556
00:33:07,700 --> 00:33:08,460
Hi pockets
557
00:33:10,220 --> 00:33:13,020
you're up shit creek but I found your paddle
558
00:33:19,460 --> 00:33:20,140
You put it back!
559
00:33:21,420 --> 00:33:24,940
Thank you, thank you so much
- Comes with a few strings attached
560
00:33:24,980 --> 00:33:27,660
I knew it would I knew it would when you presented it like a quiz show
561
00:33:27,940 --> 00:33:30,180
I'm not doing any more money laundering I told you that already
562
00:33:30,500 --> 00:33:33,820
I can't handle another criminal conviction or another flaky crotch so do your worst
563
00:33:33,860 --> 00:33:35,620
I'd rather take my chances
- Fine
564
00:33:35,660 --> 00:33:36,540
here take it
565
00:33:39,020 --> 00:33:39,460
but
566
00:33:40,620 --> 00:33:42,780
say goodbye Ronnie and Ben
567
00:33:43,540 --> 00:33:44,780
Why you leaving early? half day?
568
00:33:45,060 --> 00:33:47,740
No, they're dead, just killed them
569
00:33:48,100 --> 00:33:50,300
What are you talking about?
- This gangster up in London
570
00:33:50,580 --> 00:33:53,100
we need to repay back all his dough and wash it
571
00:33:53,460 --> 00:33:54,740
or he's gonna clip them
572
00:33:55,540 --> 00:33:58,780
and everybody they care about
- Clip them? Who's this gangster?
573
00:33:58,820 --> 00:34:00,900
Edward G Robinson?
- We're behind the eight-ball here
574
00:34:01,300 --> 00:34:03,800
We need your help
- Is he serious? - Yeah!
575
00:34:05,060 --> 00:34:07,540
I thought all the money was spent?
- We're gonna earn it back
576
00:34:07,820 --> 00:34:10,940
How?
- Running Christian Taylor's operation while he's inside
577
00:34:10,980 --> 00:34:13,380
Jesus Christ
- None of us wanna be doing this - No
578
00:34:14,460 --> 00:34:17,300
We're in trouble Mate
- Big trouble
579
00:34:29,460 --> 00:34:32,860
Good?.....OK
580
00:34:34,500 --> 00:34:37,700
Alright so his customer base is loyal
581
00:34:37,860 --> 00:34:43,780
but it's small, If we're going to make anywhere near the kind of money
we need to make in the time we have we need to find new markets,
582
00:34:43,900 --> 00:34:45,940
new customers and we need to do it quick
583
00:34:46,420 --> 00:34:49,700
How do we do that?
- Marketing - Marketing? - Yeah
584
00:34:49,900 --> 00:34:54,540
We have to find people who would buy drugs and
we need to let them know that we are here and
585
00:34:54,580 --> 00:34:56,220
we are open for business
- Oh what so we just
586
00:34:56,300 --> 00:34:57,900
put an advert in the Yellow Pages yeah?
587
00:34:58,140 --> 00:35:00,100
Class A drugs available, Oh no I'll tell you what,
588
00:35:00,500 --> 00:35:03,780
let's put class A A A and then we'll go straight to the front!
589
00:35:03,860 --> 00:35:06,060
Obviously we can't run adverts
590
00:35:06,140 --> 00:35:06,615
How do Companies
591
00:35:06,625 --> 00:35:07,980
normally reach customers?
592
00:35:08,060 --> 00:35:11,700
Direct marketing, but that that involves mailing lists
593
00:35:11,740 --> 00:35:14,220
names, numbers, e-mail addresses
594
00:35:14,260 --> 00:35:19,060
BJC must have a mailing list
- No, no way are we targeting my people
595
00:35:19,100 --> 00:35:22,700
well you know you lefty hypocrites you're actually the perfect kind of customer
596
00:35:22,820 --> 00:35:25,620
you won't touch palm oil because of deforestation but
597
00:35:26,100 --> 00:35:26,780
you'll happily snort
598
00:35:26,780 --> 00:35:29,220
cocaine that's been smuggled up some peasants Mimsy
599
00:35:29,300 --> 00:35:33,540
Firstly there is no way I'm exploiting 40 years of trust in the BJC
600
00:35:33,700 --> 00:35:34,300
and secondly
601
00:35:35,380 --> 00:35:37,500
"Mimsy"? - So what other choice do we have?
602
00:35:38,180 --> 00:35:39,580
No-one wants to be doing this
603
00:35:40,300 --> 00:35:44,100
Well what about Gabby? surely everyone in her phone is a potential customer
604
00:35:44,110 --> 00:35:46,780
What about her music festival, isn't there a mailing list for that?
605
00:35:47,060 --> 00:35:48,620
I'm not bringing Gabby into this
606
00:35:48,820 --> 00:35:52,900
You don't have to bring her into it, you just have to get the details off her phone
- And you live with her so
607
00:35:53,020 --> 00:35:56,060
I'm sure that should be easy enough
- What about you? you work in a nightclub
608
00:35:56,180 --> 00:36:00,020
I bet their mailing list is full of drug heads
- No, no my manager is proper paranoid
609
00:36:00,060 --> 00:36:00,380
He keeps
610
00:36:00,380 --> 00:36:02,700
his office door locked, computer password protected
611
00:36:02,860 --> 00:36:04,860
Nah there's no way I'd get in there
- Find a way!
612
00:36:07,060 --> 00:36:09,380
You get Gabby's mailing list, you get the BJC's
613
00:36:09,540 --> 00:36:12,500
How? It's on Clair's computer
- Figure it out
614
00:36:12,540 --> 00:36:16,260
Who put you in charge?
- Yeah what you going to contribute?
615
00:36:22,620 --> 00:36:23,500
Students
616
00:36:24,660 --> 00:36:26,460
Students, they love to party don't they?
617
00:36:27,820 --> 00:36:32,900
We have a major university right here in the city,
that is twenty thousand potential buyers right there
618
00:36:33,140 --> 00:36:36,020
But none of us are students
- No but you look like you are
619
00:37:22,220 --> 00:37:23,500
Who do I speak to about volunteering?
620
00:37:24,740 --> 00:37:30,380
if you take every sausage the average person would eat
in a lifetime, put it together in will actually reach
621
00:37:30,700 --> 00:37:31,220
to the moon
622
00:37:32,540 --> 00:37:34,220
You need to watch a documentary from Food Inc.
623
00:37:34,340 --> 00:37:36,460
You you will never meat again
624
00:37:36,500 --> 00:37:39,140
I won't go near the stuff, it's the smoking of today
625
00:37:39,180 --> 00:37:39,780
Excuse me
626
00:37:40,700 --> 00:37:42,220
Um, are you organizing the frat party?
627
00:37:42,740 --> 00:37:46,860
That was my idea, Um you missed the early bird wrist
bands okay, tickets are now thirty five a pop
628
00:37:47,180 --> 00:37:49,860
You'll get two free Jagers and entry to the wet "T" shirt competition
629
00:37:49,900 --> 00:37:51,300
Where the the contestants
630
00:37:52,220 --> 00:37:52,620
all men
631
00:37:53,940 --> 00:37:55,340
Uh, I was hoping I could volunteer
632
00:37:55,460 --> 00:37:56,300
yeah you can
633
00:37:57,620 --> 00:38:01,300
man a hose
- No, no with the uh organisation
634
00:38:01,460 --> 00:38:02,300
of the party
635
00:38:03,380 --> 00:38:04,980
Most freshers just want to get wasted
636
00:38:05,060 --> 00:38:05,580
Not me
637
00:38:06,340 --> 00:38:10,300
I, I enjoy planning more than, partying
638
00:38:23,020 --> 00:38:23,620
This is Greg
639
00:38:24,340 --> 00:38:26,020
He works for Lady Gabriella Penrose-Howe
640
00:38:26,740 --> 00:38:30,580
She comes in here...a lot
- Oh the Lady's got great taste
641
00:38:30,780 --> 00:38:32,500
Not if she comes in here she hasn't
642
00:38:32,660 --> 00:38:34,140
But she does have a great Arse!
643
00:38:34,220 --> 00:38:35,340
I'll be sure to pass that on
644
00:38:36,260 --> 00:38:37,900
I don't know if you're aware that aside from her arse
645
00:38:37,940 --> 00:38:40,140
she's also got one point two million followers on social media
646
00:38:40,260 --> 00:38:41,980
I don't use the internet much
647
00:38:42,260 --> 00:38:44,580
except for sports results and wankin'
648
00:38:45,460 --> 00:38:46,380
Well it's good to have hobbies
649
00:38:47,660 --> 00:38:50,220
Can I suggest that perhaps you give her Ladyship and quick Google
650
00:38:50,300 --> 00:38:51,700
I think you'd be quite interested in, er
651
00:38:52,300 --> 00:38:53,340
what you find
652
00:39:01,820 --> 00:39:04,100
Is Lady Gabby single? because
653
00:39:04,260 --> 00:39:07,300
my wife's just left me again I'm on the hunt
654
00:39:07,780 --> 00:39:10,180
She is right up my street classic
655
00:39:10,660 --> 00:39:13,620
well Lady Gabby is actually a member of the LGBT community
656
00:39:13,700 --> 00:39:14,460
What she's a Leso?
657
00:39:15,220 --> 00:39:18,300
What a waste?
- yeah or you'd have been in with a shot!
658
00:39:19,060 --> 00:39:20,940
Not very lady-like is she? Her Ladyship
659
00:39:21,340 --> 00:39:23,700
smashing up cars, keying cars, what's she got against cars?
660
00:39:23,740 --> 00:39:25,700
Well, she's what we called "edgy"
661
00:39:25,980 --> 00:39:27,340
Well round here we'd call her a bitch
662
00:39:27,940 --> 00:39:28,860
Well I'll be sure to pass that on
663
00:39:29,940 --> 00:39:31,340
What's your proposition?
664
00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:36,460
Well what if Lady Gabby was to tell her one point two million
followers that she's going to make a live personal appearance in your
665
00:39:36,620 --> 00:39:37,140
club this evening
666
00:39:38,420 --> 00:39:39,060
To do what?
667
00:39:40,020 --> 00:39:40,860
Wave and stuff?
668
00:39:41,380 --> 00:39:45,300
How much?
669
00:40:13,540 --> 00:40:15,700
Look after my Range like it's your own nut sack
670
00:40:16,340 --> 00:40:18,540
I see so much as of crisp wrapper in the cup holder
671
00:40:19,100 --> 00:40:19,860
speak for you
672
00:40:21,740 --> 00:40:23,220
Guard that line with your life
673
00:40:24,340 --> 00:40:25,660
because it's worth way more
674
00:40:26,420 --> 00:40:26,820
You feel me?
675
00:40:29,260 --> 00:40:29,900
Yeah I feel you
676
00:40:47,700 --> 00:40:49,980
People say she destroyed the welfare state
677
00:40:50,780 --> 00:40:53,820
public spending went up every year under Thatcher
678
00:40:54,260 --> 00:40:57,660
In 82 to 83 the government was spending 48% of the GDP
679
00:40:57,780 --> 00:41:00,020
that's more than in any year under Tony Blair
680
00:41:00,180 --> 00:41:01,140
or Gordon Brown
681
00:41:03,660 --> 00:41:04,260
Thanks Tom
682
00:41:08,540 --> 00:41:10,300
Poor bloke, what's he like 60? If I wind up
683
00:41:10,340 --> 00:41:11,500
doing that when I'm his age, shoot me yeah?
684
00:41:16,340 --> 00:41:18,780
What's wrong with what he's doing?
- No nothing I just think
685
00:41:18,980 --> 00:41:21,980
one can aspire to a little bit more than
collecting other people's crap all your life
686
00:41:22,700 --> 00:41:24,940
Why?
- If all you did everyday
687
00:41:24,980 --> 00:41:27,340
is mop latrines, empty bins for minimum wage
688
00:41:27,860 --> 00:41:29,220
why wouldn't you shoot yourself?
689
00:41:29,540 --> 00:41:31,980
What you studying?
- I'm doing a PHD
690
00:41:32,180 --> 00:41:34,700
in applied Micro Economics
- and what you gonna do when you
691
00:41:34,780 --> 00:41:37,780
finish?
- write, teach, like to be an academic
692
00:41:37,940 --> 00:41:40,500
like father
- right so your gonna spend
693
00:41:41,540 --> 00:41:45,420
5 years? studying Micro Economics and write some
694
00:41:45,500 --> 00:41:50,580
obscure academic text book that half a dozen people read
695
00:41:50,900 --> 00:41:55,860
and then spend your life teaching Micro Economics
so that other people can do the same thing, is that right?
696
00:41:56,940 --> 00:42:00,260
ssss..you're saying academia is not as worthy pursuit?
- I'm saying academia is
697
00:42:00,300 --> 00:42:02,060
masturbation in a corduroy jacket
698
00:42:04,700 --> 00:42:06,060
What are you going to do with your life then?
699
00:42:06,740 --> 00:42:07,540
I dunno
700
00:42:08,540 --> 00:42:11,420
It's not an answer
- It's honest
701
00:42:12,060 --> 00:42:13,740
I don't know, I just know I wanna live
702
00:42:14,660 --> 00:42:15,420
like.....really live
703
00:42:18,020 --> 00:42:20,420
I get that, I just got back from interrailing..
704
00:42:21,980 --> 00:42:23,100
never felt more alive
705
00:42:25,500 --> 00:42:27,420
Lawrence Chartney by the way, Union President
706
00:42:29,300 --> 00:42:30,300
Rani Rekowski
707
00:42:31,820 --> 00:42:33,660
There anything else I can help? with I'm actually
708
00:42:34,140 --> 00:42:36,060
really good at computers
- oh actually
709
00:42:36,740 --> 00:42:37,500
yes
710
00:42:39,860 --> 00:42:40,260
One two, check one two
711
00:42:43,580 --> 00:42:46,020
Oh, let me take that for you your Ladyship
712
00:42:47,460 --> 00:42:50,420
Feel free to leave anything you like in here, it's very secure
713
00:42:50,780 --> 00:42:52,260
you could even get changed in here
714
00:42:52,300 --> 00:42:54,060
if you like, that camera don't work
715
00:42:55,340 --> 00:42:58,180
when you chatted about us on your twitter and whatnot
716
00:42:58,460 --> 00:43:00,900
we sold over eighty percent of our tickets
717
00:43:01,100 --> 00:43:05,460
in one hour this place will be chock-a-block with over two thousand people
718
00:43:05,700 --> 00:43:07,580
all here to see you
- Two thousand?
719
00:43:07,900 --> 00:43:09,020
Yeah, all getting pissed off hopefully
720
00:43:10,940 --> 00:43:13,900
What what do I have to do?
- Just walk on the stage wave and
721
00:43:14,060 --> 00:43:15,180
giveaway some "T" shirts
722
00:43:16,220 --> 00:43:18,100
On on that stage?
- Yeah
723
00:43:20,540 --> 00:43:21,420
Let's talk financials
724
00:43:57,660 --> 00:43:59,860
You weren't lying, nice work
725
00:44:00,860 --> 00:44:03,700
Next could you consolidate this into one super column for me?
- Ah huh
726
00:44:07,340 --> 00:44:08,460
You know if there's something you need to, you know
727
00:44:08,660 --> 00:44:10,100
get on with
- Hey thanks for really giving it to me
728
00:44:10,620 --> 00:44:10,980
earlier
729
00:44:11,780 --> 00:44:12,540
that holds barred
730
00:44:13,300 --> 00:44:16,820
You know there's a lot of smart people in this place but
most them struggle to keep up with me but not you - Mmmm
731
00:44:19,220 --> 00:44:19,740
Namaste - Namaste
732
00:44:21,740 --> 00:44:22,740
Can I ask you a personal question?
733
00:44:23,340 --> 00:44:25,580
Shut me down immediately if this is out of order
734
00:44:25,740 --> 00:44:28,620
but I would love to converse further
735
00:44:29,220 --> 00:44:30,300
Can I get your "detes"?
736
00:44:30,980 --> 00:44:32,580
My "detes"?
- Short for details
737
00:44:33,380 --> 00:44:34,260
Not by much!
738
00:44:34,820 --> 00:44:35,300
What are you saying?
739
00:44:37,100 --> 00:44:37,740
Yeah, OK, sure
740
00:44:38,380 --> 00:44:38,700
Great!
741
00:44:40,860 --> 00:44:41,940
So what are you studying here by the way?
742
00:44:43,180 --> 00:44:45,820
Uumm, math...matics and physics
- Yeah?
743
00:44:46,020 --> 00:44:47,260
I do maths as my undergrad
- Really, it's
744
00:44:47,580 --> 00:44:50,660
..neat, it's great
- How are you finding it so far?
745
00:44:51,140 --> 00:44:53,060
Proffesor Sturridge is a bit of a hard arse right?
746
00:44:53,180 --> 00:44:55,540
Is he? I hadn't noticed, Um
747
00:44:56,780 --> 00:44:57,420
She is
748
00:44:59,860 --> 00:45:02,820
Oh yeah yeah yeah sorry just seemed to have low-cushedme
- ha ha ha
749
00:45:07,300 --> 00:45:10,620
Ah, we're going to head the bar for some drinks and I think you should join
750
00:45:12,020 --> 00:45:13,740
yeah I just really, you know I want to break the
751
00:45:13,940 --> 00:45:16,420
back at this but then I'll be I'll be straight down
752
00:45:16,660 --> 00:45:17,580
That's a great work ethic
753
00:45:18,940 --> 00:45:23,180
Yeah whatever it is you choose to do in life I can tell
You're going to crush it!
754
00:45:26,980 --> 00:45:27,660
I'll see you down there
755
00:45:37,050 --> 00:45:39,550
Mailing list, come on
756
00:45:51,100 --> 00:45:53,580
What is it?
- John I'm at the you know where
757
00:45:53,800 --> 00:45:59,800
trying to get the you know what off of Gail's computer
- Lovely, why are you calling me? - Because I don't use computers
758
00:45:59,900 --> 00:46:02,460
I've just literally spent the last 45 minutes trying to turn the damn thing on!
759
00:46:02,780 --> 00:46:06,050
Where's the mailing list?
- How could I possibly know that?
760
00:46:06,100 --> 00:46:08,620
Well you use computers don't you?
761
00:46:08,660 --> 00:46:10,660
Yeah I have yes not that exact one
762
00:46:13,340 --> 00:46:16,690
What's on the screen? - A waterfall
- Are there folders with with waterfall?
763
00:46:16,700 --> 00:46:17,860
Folders?
- Yeah
764
00:46:18,540 --> 00:46:22,140
The little icons that look like folders
- No there are no folders
765
00:46:22,300 --> 00:46:26,800
I just told you it's just a waterfall
- Then you're looking at a screen saver - A what?
766
00:46:29,980 --> 00:46:33,800
Ladies and Gentlemen Lady Gabriella Penrose-Howe
767
00:46:35,820 --> 00:46:39,300
She's on, what's she waiting for?
- She's just getting in the zone, just give her a second
768
00:46:40,980 --> 00:46:41,620
Do you know what a mouse is?
769
00:46:42,500 --> 00:46:42,980
Yeah, yes
770
00:46:43,700 --> 00:46:44,820
I know what a mouse is
- Jiggle it
771
00:46:46,780 --> 00:46:49,220
Oooh...right....yes
772
00:46:49,900 --> 00:46:52,580
Now that's done somethin' so now the screen is purple and grey
773
00:46:53,780 --> 00:46:56,140
and there are lots of little folders
774
00:46:57,740 --> 00:46:58,180
Now what?
775
00:47:03,820 --> 00:47:05,700
Look for one that says mailing list
776
00:47:05,710 --> 00:47:07,620
or something like that, my pork chop
777
00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:09,660
is getting cold by the ways
778
00:47:10,380 --> 00:47:12,020
Mail out, right there's one
779
00:47:12,020 --> 00:47:13,180
called mail out, could that be it?
780
00:47:14,060 --> 00:47:15,300
Could be
- Now what?
781
00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:17,260
Now drag and drop it onto your USB
782
00:47:21,780 --> 00:47:23,340
You ready?
- I can't do it
783
00:47:24,580 --> 00:47:26,700
Yeah you can, he's paying you fifteen hundred quid
784
00:47:26,980 --> 00:47:28,980
per club...and he's got 5 clubs
785
00:47:29,300 --> 00:47:32,060
that's seven and a half grand, almost pays off your bar tab!
786
00:47:32,820 --> 00:47:36,860
what does drag & drop mean?
- Christ, my Mother-in-Law can drag and drop and she's 92
787
00:47:36,860 --> 00:47:39,380
and blind just put the arrow over the folder
788
00:47:39,540 --> 00:47:40,340
put the arrow, the arrow
789
00:47:42,860 --> 00:47:47,780
How do I do that?
- with the mouse, put the arrow over the folder with the mouse
790
00:47:47,780 --> 00:47:50,220
Do not fucking shout at me
791
00:47:54,460 --> 00:47:58,020
Hi, Imran Hi, this may be nothing but
792
00:47:58,100 --> 00:48:00,620
this new fresh has just volunteered at the student union
793
00:48:00,660 --> 00:48:02,660
and something smells a bit off
794
00:48:02,900 --> 00:48:05,940
about her, would you mind just searching to see if she's actually a student here?
795
00:48:06,260 --> 00:48:07,900
her name is Rani Rekowski
796
00:48:11,740 --> 00:48:13,460
Oh damn I left my phone and my coat
797
00:48:13,540 --> 00:48:14,180
in your office
798
00:48:15,620 --> 00:48:16,020
Nah it's cool, I'll go
799
00:48:17,060 --> 00:48:17,940
Oh
- Cheers
800
00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:29,800
the arrow is now
801
00:48:30,300 --> 00:48:32,540
over the folder
802
00:48:32,660 --> 00:48:35,580
Now what?
- now press and hold the button on the mouse
803
00:48:36,820 --> 00:48:37,260
Right
804
00:48:49,140 --> 00:48:49,660
B-I-G
805
00:48:51,500 --> 00:48:52,220
Big drugs fly
806
00:49:11,940 --> 00:49:13,860
without releasing the button, drag it
807
00:49:14,020 --> 00:49:15,100
into your USB
808
00:49:17,060 --> 00:49:18,700
What is a USB?
- What's a US........?
809
00:49:22,300 --> 00:49:24,020
There's no trace of her, anywhere?
810
00:49:24,940 --> 00:49:27,180
Will you come with me while I have a little conflab with her?
811
00:49:29,660 --> 00:49:30,820
How many eggs do you have a week?
812
00:49:32,300 --> 00:49:36,300
It's frozen...come on..come on
813
00:49:36,820 --> 00:49:38,060
see exactly, this is the problem
814
00:49:38,140 --> 00:49:38,420
with.....
815
00:49:39,620 --> 00:49:40,620
Stay where you are I'm coming over
816
00:49:45,820 --> 00:49:46,900
watch this documentary
817
00:49:47,420 --> 00:49:48,780
you'll never eat meat again
818
00:50:17,460 --> 00:50:19,500
can I get triple vodka with tonic please
819
00:50:20,460 --> 00:50:23,460
In fact just hold the tonic
- Of course, I'll stick it on your tab
820
00:50:24,660 --> 00:50:26,820
Is that wise, no drink or drugs remember
821
00:50:26,860 --> 00:50:28,300
I need it
- No you don't
822
00:50:28,700 --> 00:50:33,460
I can't go out there sober, I dont sing
I don't dance I don't act I don't do anything I
823
00:50:34,060 --> 00:50:36,460
I'm like an appendix
- It doesn't matter, they just wanna
824
00:50:36,660 --> 00:50:38,100
stare at you and take pictures
825
00:50:38,340 --> 00:50:39,540
like an accident on the motorway
826
00:50:40,020 --> 00:50:40,340
Really?
- Yeah
827
00:50:41,340 --> 00:50:45,380
just think of yourself as a as a family of four who've
had a head on collision with an eighteen wheeler
828
00:50:46,060 --> 00:50:46,540
Yeah, this is, this is
829
00:50:47,580 --> 00:50:48,860
making me feel better keep talking
830
00:50:49,020 --> 00:50:50,540
they've cut Mum and the kids but it doesn't
831
00:50:50,700 --> 00:50:51,380
look like Dad's gonna make it
832
00:50:53,340 --> 00:50:53,660
Thank you
833
00:51:41,460 --> 00:51:55,300
What's up darlings? How are we all tonight? Who wants some free
shit? You need to shout it louder, who wants some free shit?
834
00:52:42,780 --> 00:52:45,500
It's gonna take hours to text all numbers we've got
835
00:52:45,540 --> 00:52:48,940
No it won't, we can automate an SMS mail out from this laptop, I did a
836
00:52:49,180 --> 00:52:51,380
quick Google research and found some open source Robo-text software
837
00:52:52,260 --> 00:52:54,980
Wat did she just say?
- So what's our message going to be?
838
00:52:55,060 --> 00:52:58,140
Oh Hi there we've got some lovely Cocaine for sale
- We need code words
839
00:52:58,220 --> 00:53:01,300
What about Um... "grown up sweeties"
- Well that just sounds PW doesn't it!
840
00:53:02,300 --> 00:53:05,740
We need a euphemism that appeals to middle class users
841
00:53:05,820 --> 00:53:09,660
who...get the cocaine out at dinner parties
- Colombian after eats?
842
00:53:09,980 --> 00:53:11,860
Throw in the words fair trade and organic
843
00:53:12,180 --> 00:53:12,460
No can do
844
00:53:12,460 --> 00:53:16,820
If you call a product organic when it hasn't been
certified by an official body you're actually breaking the law
845
00:53:16,860 --> 00:53:18,860
oh right because we don't want our cocaine
846
00:53:19,140 --> 00:53:28,620
- breaking the law - This is never going to work what we just
gonna send out spam and hope that someone replies? - Listen, flyers cold
calling you looking at a two to three percent success rate
847
00:53:28,740 --> 00:53:31,180
What about referrals?
- Forty to fifty percent
848
00:53:31,500 --> 00:53:32,620
OK so we just need a few
849
00:53:32,620 --> 00:53:34,820
bites to get word of mouth going
850
00:53:34,900 --> 00:53:36,660
And what if we accidentally message a policeman?
851
00:53:36,900 --> 00:53:40,620
Well no policeman's making extra work for
themselves by chasing down an anonymous text
852
00:53:40,780 --> 00:53:44,660
Well what if we accidentally message a do gooder who then
notifies a policeman?
853
00:53:44,700 --> 00:53:48,660
Myrn's, do you notify a policeman every time you get spam e-mail from some
854
00:53:48,940 --> 00:53:50,260
Nigerian Prince?
855
00:53:51,380 --> 00:53:53,740
Don't
- and we're using burner phones so they won't be able
856
00:53:53,820 --> 00:53:54,780
trace it back to us
857
00:53:56,100 --> 00:53:59,900
Coffee - I'd love a coffee mate thanks
- No, that's our codeword
858
00:54:00,540 --> 00:54:03,380
Flat white for coke, espresso for crack
859
00:54:04,020 --> 00:54:06,700
single short, double shot, how many bags you want?
860
00:54:08,940 --> 00:54:09,500
Sounds good!
861
00:54:10,380 --> 00:54:11,140
Well it's gonna do, yeah
862
00:54:24,300 --> 00:54:24,900
Godspeed
863
00:54:49,180 --> 00:54:50,300
Shall we order some actual coffees?
864
00:54:51,980 --> 00:54:52,460
Yeah good shout
865
00:54:55,140 --> 00:54:56,100
Oh shit the bed
866
00:55:05,140 --> 00:55:05,860
What's your need?
867
00:55:07,140 --> 00:55:07,900
This message
868
00:55:08,580 --> 00:55:09,340
Is it what I think it is?
869
00:55:10,340 --> 00:55:12,460
It is
- How do I know you're not police?
870
00:55:13,100 --> 00:55:16,180
Well unless you're planning on buying a couple kilos police on interested in you
871
00:55:17,380 --> 00:55:20,180
Fair enough, two flat whites and a double espresso please
872
00:55:22,100 --> 00:55:24,340
Where are you at?
- Makepeace Avenue
873
00:55:24,940 --> 00:55:26,140
Someone will be along shortly
874
00:55:26,940 --> 00:55:27,700
Tell your friends
- Er...OK
875
00:55:29,540 --> 00:55:30,580
Bye...er..uh
876
00:55:54,100 --> 00:55:54,580
Hello
877
00:55:56,060 --> 00:55:56,460
Yeah what you want?
878
00:55:58,380 --> 00:56:00,620
Where are you at?
- What coffees do you require?
879
00:56:16,500 --> 00:56:17,580
The second.....and you?
880
00:56:19,980 --> 00:56:21,460
And where are you at?
- Where are you?
881
00:56:23,380 --> 00:56:24,580
Yeah focal point
- What you wearing?
882
00:56:25,420 --> 00:56:27,020
I don't mean that in a sexy way, I just mean you know
883
00:56:27,300 --> 00:56:28,620
What you wearing so we can identify you
884
00:56:28,980 --> 00:56:29,980
When seconds count
885
00:56:31,540 --> 00:56:34,900
We'll be with you in about 15
- OK bye
886
00:56:35,580 --> 00:56:37,020
besides it's dark
887
00:56:37,860 --> 00:56:38,620
Spread the word OK?
71730
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