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1
00:00:01,280 --> 00:00:05,990
Do I think this is real? No.
What are you? An idiot?
2
00:00:06,560 --> 00:00:08,790
Is the government involved
in any of this kind of stuff?
3
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:11,269
Mind control... I mean, I hope so.
4
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:12,435
(LAUGHS)
5
00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:14,114
(LAUGHING)
6
00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:16,395
I think we're all in a Dollhouse.
7
00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:18,711
Like, would I hire somebody
who's been imprinted?
8
00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:21,115
I would just go to jail.
9
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:27,230
No, I would help people.
We would save nuns and orphans together.
10
00:00:27,320 --> 00:00:28,958
I don't wanna hire
11
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:33,709
a female or male doll for sexual purposes,
thanks.
12
00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:36,435
I would like to live in the Dollhouse
13
00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:40,399
and just go
from spa treatment to spa treatment.
14
00:00:40,480 --> 00:00:43,040
- Yeah, you'd like to be an in-Active doll.
- All day. I'll be like... Yes.
15
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:48,599
No. Wiping people's brains to make them
what you want them to be...
16
00:00:48,680 --> 00:00:51,592
You know, I've tried it with boyfriends.
It didn't work.
17
00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:55,310
A person's almost there,
like 80%% % of the way.
18
00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:57,994
If they would stop laughing like that,
you know?
19
00:00:58,080 --> 00:00:59,115
(EX CLAIMS) Keeper.
20
00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:03,359
I've married a very stubborn man,
who, despite my attempts to imprint him,
21
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:05,829
has stayed exactly the way he was
the day we married.
22
00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:10,552
You know, just... I just wish...
Could I just get in there and... Yeah, yeah.
23
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:13,074
Fix it up a little bit,
and then they'd be perfect.
24
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,948
Maybe if I could have,
like, the perfect boyfriend,
25
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:20,715
make the perfect boyfriend
out of my current boyfriend.
26
00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:24,713
I'd probably wanna say some things
to loved ones that I'd lost.
27
00:01:25,320 --> 00:01:28,995
Oh, my God! Imprinting skills?
Lay them on me.
28
00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:31,196
I'd like to play the piano
29
00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:34,114
like a person with fingers.
30
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:38,318
I have this list of books that...
They're just screaming at me, like,
31
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:39,719
"You're ignorant!" You know?
32
00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:44,157
I would be imprinted with the ability
to put things back where I found them.
33
00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:47,789
I just sort of wish...
You know, and just shove it in.
34
00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:51,634
And, ooh! Ninja skills are only
five dollars extra? I'll take those.
35
00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,916
- Be able to play like Jimi Hendrix.
- Done.
36
00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:55,752
And, like, crack a safe.
37
00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:58,274
You know, that's what I would do.
I would go for weird combinations.
38
00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:01,836
Well, I've always wanted
to just be like a rock-and-roller.
39
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:05,071
Like, just sing the crap out of songs.
40
00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:07,516
You know, I wanna be a master...
41
00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:09,477
(BOTH LAUGHING)
42
00:02:10,640 --> 00:02:13,108
There are some people I know
who have too many skills,
43
00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:14,599
and I'm talking about Felicia Day.
44
00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:19,393
I'm not a doll. If I was a doll,
I would be a lot more confident.
45
00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:21,795
Would I ever volunteer myself?
46
00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:22,915
No.
47
00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:24,835
I don't volunteer for anything.
48
00:02:25,120 --> 00:02:28,192
You know, let me go and play
Carnegie Hall and, you know,
49
00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:34,355
play Ravel's transcendental work
or something like that.
50
00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:37,795
If I couldn't remember it,
what would the point be?
51
00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:40,838
Despite my many,
many thousands of flaws,
52
00:02:40,920 --> 00:02:43,832
I've always been
pretty comfortable being me.
53
00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:48,991
Having said that, my avatar online
is a beautiful, young Asian woman.
54
00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:50,833
Who wouldn't wanna be an Active?
55
00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:54,959
What if you could just, like, click off,
and then wake up,
56
00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:57,031
I don't know, a couple months,
couple years later,
57
00:02:57,120 --> 00:02:59,236
with, like, zero percent body fat?
58
00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:03,678
I know I'm not necessarily that tall,
but I'd like to play for the Lakers.
59
00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:05,079
And you know that the whole time,
60
00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:09,392
you've been probably having sex
with some pretty cool people.
61
00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:13,355
The whole sexual fantasy is fine with me.
62
00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:16,992
Have I ever met anybody
I suspected was a doll?
63
00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:21,114
I've met some people who I suspected
were empty-headed playthings.
64
00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:25,559
I dated a girl once who seemed to
have more than one personality,
65
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:31,313
but my therapist assured me
it was Dissociative Personality Disorder.
66
00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:33,676
(LAUGHING) There are a lot of them in LA.
67
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,796
And they all go to the gym.
68
00:03:37,320 --> 00:03:40,471
You mean, like, a doll, like on the show?
No.
69
00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,520
I've come across some people
who are like, "Hi."
70
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:47,275
Idiot.
71
00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:48,998
I'm like, "Hi."
72
00:03:49,680 --> 00:03:51,238
They're like...
73
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:54,912
I mean, mostly on dates.
74
00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,308
You seem like you have someone in mind.
75
00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:01,713
Are you suggesting that I seem like one?
76
00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:05,756
If there's a doll among us,
the most obvious...
77
00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:10,798
The most obvious choice, you know,
who I think is the doll, is Joss.
78
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:15,152
It seems like that would make
perfect sense in Fran's head, I think.
79
00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:19,069
Because he's just here
to make a show called Dollhouse.
80
00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:22,233
Just to throw us all off.
"Oh, what a ridiculous show.
81
00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:24,515
"Oh, no, it's some science fiction thing
on Fox.
82
00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:29,196
"He did a show about vampires,
it's ridiculous." Or is it?
83
00:04:29,280 --> 00:04:33,478
Joss is probably a part owner
in the real Dollhouse.
84
00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:37,155
Oh, sure. 'Cause how is anyone
that brilliant, right?
85
00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:38,798
Yeah, totally. I'll buy that.
86
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:40,069
We did say to him once
87
00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:44,950
if there was an imprint for
a television writer, he would be it.
88
00:04:45,880 --> 00:04:49,395
- Really? Well...
- Really? That's one funny-Iooking doll.
89
00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:51,391
- Just kidding.
- Yeah.
90
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,357
Whose fantasy is that?
91
00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:55,835
If ever there was a man
who seems to have
92
00:04:55,920 --> 00:04:58,878
more than the normal number of brains,
I would say that it's Joss Whedon.
93
00:04:59,080 --> 00:05:02,277
I think if he's a doll, he's more like Alpha.
94
00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:05,158
Joss has got, like,
maybe not 48 personalities,
95
00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:06,673
I mean, he's got at least 10.
96
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:11,159
Next time I see Joss, I'm gonna say,
"It's time for your treatment."
97
00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:15,677
See what he does.
He might start, like, short-circuiting.
98
00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:19,118
There's no way I would be this depressing
and procrastinate this much.
99
00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:22,158
I don't think
the computer could create Joss.
100
00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:29,468
I think only his very particular collection of
experiences and brain cells could do that.
101
00:05:30,280 --> 00:05:32,111
Well, I think he's the real deal.
102
00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:35,988
If I am a doll, clearly the technology
has not been perfected.
103
00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:37,399
That's all I'm saying.
104
00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:46,229
English - SDH
8900
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