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In 1971, a young woman died
at the age of 20.
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00:03:13,361 --> 00:03:15,988
She left behind a husband,
a two year old daughter
3
00:03:16,614 --> 00:03:18,574
and a journal of tape recordings.
4
00:03:19,784 --> 00:03:22,912
A journal that told what it was like
to be young and a mother
5
00:03:23,287 --> 00:03:25,581
and in love and dying.
6
00:03:26,499 --> 00:03:29,585
The names of the people in her life
have been changed.
7
00:03:30,169 --> 00:03:32,129
But we have retained her spirit
8
00:03:32,672 --> 00:03:34,965
and many of the actual words
from her tapes.
9
00:03:37,093 --> 00:03:40,262
J“ country roads, take me home j“
10
00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:45,142
Boy, I want them
to play "country roads" at my funeral.
11
00:03:47,269 --> 00:03:50,647
Dying is beautiful,
even the first time around
12
00:03:50,648 --> 00:03:51,941
at the ripe old age of 20.
13
00:03:54,443 --> 00:03:56,194
It's not easy most of the time,
14
00:03:56,195 --> 00:03:59,198
but there is a real beauty to be found
in knowing that your end...
15
00:03:59,824 --> 00:04:02,493
Is gonna catch up with you faster
than you had expected.
16
00:04:03,536 --> 00:04:06,621
And that you have to get all your loving
and laughing and crying done
17
00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:07,915
as 800” as you can.
18
00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:13,504
I pray that I live long enough
to see Jill become a human being.
19
00:04:13,671 --> 00:04:15,423
Independent of Sam and me.
20
00:04:16,048 --> 00:04:18,926
At least old enough to reason some
on her own.
21
00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:20,886
Old enough so she'll remember me.
22
00:04:23,931 --> 00:04:26,434
I guess I like the idea of cremation
23
00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:30,646
for the thought of having my ashes
just spread across the mountains.
24
00:04:42,116 --> 00:04:46,120
J“ almost heaven West Virginia j“
25
00:04:46,746 --> 00:04:50,583
j“ blue Ridge mountains,
shenandoah river j“
26
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:56,129
j“ life is old there
older than the trees j“
27
00:04:56,130 --> 00:05:00,508
j“ younger than the mountains
blowing like a breeze j“
28
00:05:00,509 --> 00:05:05,097
J“ country roads, take me home j“
29
00:05:05,473 --> 00:05:10,518
j“ to the place I belong j“
30
00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:15,316
j“ West Virginia, mountain mamma j“
31
00:05:15,524 --> 00:05:20,029
j“take me home, country roads j“
32
00:05:21,781 --> 00:05:25,951
j“ all my memories, gather round her j“
33
00:05:26,744 --> 00:05:31,165
j“ miner's lady, stranger to blue water j“
34
00:05:31,957 --> 00:05:36,586
j“ dark and dusty, painted on the sky j“
35
00:05:36,587 --> 00:05:40,924
j“ misty taste of moonshine
teardrop in her eye j“
36
00:05:40,925 --> 00:05:45,262
j“ country roads, take me home j“
37
00:05:45,596 --> 00:05:50,683
j“ to the place I belong j“
38
00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:55,231
j“ West Virginia, mountain mamma j“
39
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:59,735
j“ take me home, country roads j“
40
00:06:01,821 --> 00:06:06,283
j“ I hear her voice in the morning hour
she calls me j“
41
00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:11,121
j“ the radio reminds me
of my home far away j“
42
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:15,041
j“ driving down the road I get a feeling j“
43
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:18,170
j“ that I should have
been home yesterday j“
44
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:21,048
j“ yesterday j“
45
00:06:22,007 --> 00:06:30,007
j“ country roads, take me home j“
46
00:06:31,475 --> 00:06:33,018
j“ take me home j“
47
00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:36,355
j“...in my life's time... j“
48
00:06:36,814 --> 00:06:39,440
In the early months of 1970
49
00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:41,861
Kate Hayden was living in Riverdale,
Washington.
50
00:06:42,486 --> 00:06:44,029
She had just turned 19.
51
00:06:44,655 --> 00:06:46,115
And she was very much in love.
52
00:06:48,117 --> 00:06:53,914
J“ I've been lately thinking
about my life's time j“
53
00:06:54,290 --> 00:06:57,751
j“ all the things I've done
and how it's been j“
54
00:06:59,545 --> 00:07:04,675
j“ and I can't help believing
in my own mind j“
55
00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:08,803
j“ I know I'm gonna hate to see it and j“
56
00:07:11,348 --> 00:07:13,725
J“ I know my lady's pleasure j“
57
00:07:13,726 --> 00:07:14,852
morning, toots.
58
00:07:15,019 --> 00:07:16,436
There she is! Wow!
59
00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:22,108
That's terrific. Remind me to hire you
when I get rich.
60
00:07:22,109 --> 00:07:23,027
-Ok. _ok?
61
00:07:23,028 --> 00:07:28,031
J“ I have to say it now
it's been a good life all in all j“
62
00:07:28,032 --> 00:07:32,328
j“ it's really fine to have a chance
to hang around j“
63
00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:40,293
J“ lie there by the fire
and watch the evening tire j“
64
00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:42,922
Get your bunny!
65
00:07:43,923 --> 00:07:45,507
Your bunny...
66
00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:50,155
Oh, and yeah, well, listen, what was
the verdict at the doctor's, anyway?
67
00:07:50,179 --> 00:07:52,139
Oh, same old bursitis.
68
00:07:52,348 --> 00:07:56,100
He gave me a shot. Said I can try out
for the olympic track team tomorrow.
69
00:07:56,101 --> 00:07:57,894
Oh, that's terrific.
That's terrific for you.
70
00:07:57,895 --> 00:07:59,854
Yeah, but why didn't he
just give you that last month?
71
00:07:59,855 --> 00:08:01,981
Why does he wait until now
to do all that stuff.
72
00:08:01,982 --> 00:08:04,193
Well, we're having this thing
73
00:08:04,360 --> 00:08:08,113
and we figured you'd never get suspicious
if I had to keep going back for my knee.
74
00:08:08,489 --> 00:08:10,324
Yeah!
75
00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:21,292
I gotcha. I gotcha.
76
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:25,422
I gotcha.
77
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:28,466
Uh, do you mind, please?
78
00:08:28,467 --> 00:08:30,594
You should be a plumber
instead of a musician.
79
00:08:35,224 --> 00:08:36,517
Sex fiends!
80
00:08:38,394 --> 00:08:39,394
Later.
81
00:08:39,561 --> 00:08:41,396
- Much later!
- Yeah!
82
00:09:03,252 --> 00:09:04,503
- Sam?
- Hmm?
83
00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:06,672
- Sam?
- Hmm?
84
00:09:07,131 --> 00:09:09,049
Hold me.
85
00:09:10,426 --> 00:09:12,051
-Listen.
86
00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,637
I'll hold ya. I'll hold ya.
87
00:09:14,638 --> 00:09:16,597
What? What did...? It's all right, baby.
88
00:09:16,598 --> 00:09:19,226
He's wrong. I know he's wrong.
I know, the doctor.
89
00:09:19,393 --> 00:09:21,686
The doctor? What's he wrong about then?
90
00:09:21,687 --> 00:09:22,771
The bursitis.
91
00:09:23,022 --> 00:09:24,022
Huh?
92
00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:26,608
The bursitis,
I know he's wrong about that.
93
00:09:26,817 --> 00:09:28,277
Why? How? Why?
94
00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:31,196
'Cause I keep having this dream.
95
00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:35,034
- I just know it's something else.
- Oh! Baby!
96
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:40,539
- Baby, dreams never, ever come true.
- No, it's true.
97
00:09:41,165 --> 00:09:42,499
They do not.
98
00:09:45,544 --> 00:09:46,544
Hey.
99
00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:49,380
Hey.
100
00:09:49,798 --> 00:09:50,883
You know what?
101
00:09:51,050 --> 00:09:52,050
What?
102
00:09:54,762 --> 00:09:59,099
We're going to the mountains tomorrow.
103
00:10:01,143 --> 00:10:02,983
- Wanna go to the mountains tomorrow?
- Mm-hmm.
104
00:10:04,396 --> 00:10:05,396
It's up!
105
00:10:06,023 --> 00:10:07,023
It's up!
106
00:10:09,485 --> 00:10:11,569
All right!
107
00:10:11,570 --> 00:10:14,448
I was so happy that week
and I was just gonna explode.
108
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,117
So full of love for my baby and my man
109
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:22,039
And those absolutely
mind blowing mountains.
110
00:10:22,498 --> 00:10:24,665
There just wasn't room for anything else.
111
00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:27,628
There wasn't room for pain or sickness
or fear.
112
00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:31,297
Life was just too incredibly beautiful.
113
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:32,257
Come here.
114
00:10:32,258 --> 00:10:33,592
Oh!
115
00:10:34,301 --> 00:10:36,845
When are you gonna
get some real hair any how?
116
00:10:38,514 --> 00:10:40,723
Oh! Baby.
117
00:10:42,601 --> 00:10:44,895
Aw, come on. Let's gather some.
118
00:10:47,439 --> 00:10:50,233
You're supposed to have long,
silky curls, so I can...
119
00:10:50,234 --> 00:10:52,068
Play Alice in wonderland with you.
120
00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:55,364
Yes, I'll be the white rabbit,
and daddy'll be mad hatter. Come on.
121
00:10:55,781 --> 00:10:57,616
I'll get this soap off of ya.
122
00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:01,244
And we can get out of the tub,
yes we can.
123
00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:03,247
Come on. Yes.
124
00:11:03,580 --> 00:11:05,998
Sam! Sam!
125
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:08,042
Sam! Sam!
126
00:11:08,043 --> 00:11:10,670
What? What ha...
127
00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:13,506
Get Jill! No! Get Jill!
128
00:11:13,507 --> 00:11:14,924
Ok, no, no.
129
00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:17,593
Baby, baby. Baby, baby.
130
00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:19,429
Why? What happened? Why? What?
131
00:11:20,222 --> 00:11:21,765
- What happened?
- I don't know.
132
00:11:21,932 --> 00:11:22,932
Did you slip?
133
00:11:22,933 --> 00:11:23,933
- No, it was my knee.
- Was there water on the floor?
134
00:11:23,934 --> 00:11:25,309
- Something here fall? What?
- It was my knee.
135
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:26,538
- Your knee? Does it hurt?
- It was my knee!
136
00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:28,021
Does it hurt?
137
00:11:28,230 --> 00:11:29,398
It just collapsed.
138
00:11:30,816 --> 00:11:35,153
Ok, that's it! We're going to Riverdale!
Right today and we get another doctor.
139
00:11:35,154 --> 00:11:36,989
One that's... a good one this time.
140
00:11:37,281 --> 00:11:39,198
Dr. Colburn's just as good
as any doctor.
141
00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,199
He's a quack!
142
00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:43,286
- You don't even know him!
- What's he done but waste our time?
143
00:11:43,287 --> 00:11:44,788
He's done his best.
144
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:47,206
That's why I went to the clinic.
To save money.
145
00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:50,710
Right, and like all your bargains,
it winds up costing us ten times as much.
146
00:11:50,711 --> 00:11:52,378
I think you're terrific, too.
147
00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:54,214
Weaver had a line on a used bike.
148
00:11:54,548 --> 00:11:57,592
Now, we're gonna have to spend
every last penny on another stupid doctor.
149
00:11:57,593 --> 00:12:00,012
I don't enjoy being sick!
150
00:12:00,470 --> 00:12:03,098
I'm not doing it on purpose!
151
00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:07,436
I'm not doing it to thwart you!
I don't enjoy almost killing my baby!
152
00:12:07,978 --> 00:12:08,978
Quit blaming me!
153
00:12:08,979 --> 00:12:12,773
All I'm saying is that if you would've
went to a decent doctor six months ago,
154
00:12:12,774 --> 00:12:14,276
you'd be well by now.
155
00:12:14,860 --> 00:12:17,904
By waiting six months now,
it's gonna take ten times longer to cure
156
00:12:17,905 --> 00:12:21,782
and it's gonna take us ten times as much
and we can't afford it.
157
00:12:21,783 --> 00:12:25,453
Nobody says you have to spend your money
on me. No strings, remember?
158
00:12:25,454 --> 00:12:27,246
Bye, good riddance.
159
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:28,624
Meaning?
160
00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:31,834
Leave! Go get your stupid bike! I'll cope!
161
00:12:31,835 --> 00:12:34,545
Will you? Maybe you will. Yeah.
162
00:12:34,546 --> 00:12:39,550
What am I here for, then? What am I doing?
Am I decoration? I know, comic relief.
163
00:12:39,551 --> 00:12:41,136
Right? Right.
164
00:12:42,512 --> 00:12:43,721
You really want me to leave?
165
00:12:43,722 --> 00:12:46,682
Please yourself! Do what you wanna do!
166
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:47,683
Right.
167
00:12:51,855 --> 00:12:52,856
Creep!
168
00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:12,042
Beep-beep.
169
00:13:17,215 --> 00:13:19,216
Do you need a ride, pretty lady?
170
00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:22,135
You're late.
171
00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:29,768
Wanna get in then?
172
00:13:49,288 --> 00:13:50,496
Where are we going?
173
00:13:50,497 --> 00:13:52,291
Spokane. For tests.
174
00:13:53,083 --> 00:13:54,918
Now he thinks it's a tumor.
175
00:13:58,005 --> 00:14:00,799
What's a tumor? It's a mole, it's nothing.
176
00:14:06,888 --> 00:14:08,473
I gotta be there Monday.
177
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:13,520
Please, Sam.
178
00:14:14,438 --> 00:14:16,315
Don't bail out on me now.
179
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:25,072
Hmm.
180
00:14:25,073 --> 00:14:26,073
Well...
181
00:14:26,116 --> 00:14:28,660
Well, what do you need then?
You need the bus fare?
182
00:14:30,245 --> 00:14:31,621
Or do you need me?
183
00:14:36,168 --> 00:14:38,336
How can you be so silly?
184
00:14:38,337 --> 00:14:39,337
Well...
185
00:14:39,421 --> 00:14:40,421
Hmm?
186
00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:43,508
How can I love anybody as stupid as you?
187
00:15:43,318 --> 00:15:46,530
Well, if it isn't
old foul mouth Weaver himself?
188
00:15:47,072 --> 00:15:48,073
Where have you been?
189
00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:50,784
Oh, here and there.
190
00:15:51,368 --> 00:15:52,743
Horrific to see you, Kate.
191
00:15:52,744 --> 00:15:54,578
It's been heaven without you.
192
00:15:54,579 --> 00:15:57,373
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do you know, uh, Sam Hayden?
193
00:15:57,374 --> 00:15:59,292
Uh, no, but I think I should.
194
00:15:59,835 --> 00:16:01,710
Uh, hi.
195
00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:04,839
Hello!
196
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:05,840
Hi.
197
00:16:06,341 --> 00:16:07,842
First, can I have a glass of water?
198
00:16:07,843 --> 00:16:09,386
- I'll get it.
- No, I'll get it.
199
00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:18,060
Ah-ha!
200
00:16:18,353 --> 00:16:19,354
Ah-ha!
201
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:21,355
The... ah-ha...
202
00:16:22,816 --> 00:16:24,693
- Lookin' for some water?
- Yes.
203
00:16:32,075 --> 00:16:33,034
Thank you.
204
00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:34,034
You're welcome.
205
00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:06,066
J“ sunshine in my eyes j“
206
00:17:06,067 --> 00:17:08,862
j“ can make me cry j“
207
00:17:09,321 --> 00:17:11,031
do you come on like this to everybody?
208
00:17:12,115 --> 00:17:13,115
Are you embarrassed?
209
00:17:13,116 --> 00:17:14,116
J“ sunshine j“
210
00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:19,163
j“ on the water looks so lovely j“
211
00:17:19,164 --> 00:17:20,164
you shouldn't be.
212
00:17:20,582 --> 00:17:21,583
Why not?
213
00:17:24,252 --> 00:17:26,045
J“ sunshine j“
214
00:17:26,046 --> 00:17:27,839
- can I sit there?
- Where?
215
00:17:28,215 --> 00:17:29,841
- Right there.
- Sure.
216
00:17:32,344 --> 00:17:34,638
J“ makes me high j“
217
00:17:36,306 --> 00:17:41,061
J“ sunshine on my shoulders j“
218
00:17:41,311 --> 00:17:45,482
j“ looks so lovely j“
219
00:17:47,776 --> 00:17:50,194
j“ sunshine j“
220
00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:52,696
j“ in my eyes j“
221
00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:55,784
j“ can make me cry j“
222
00:17:59,246 --> 00:18:01,373
j“ sunshine j“
223
00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:04,458
j“ on the waterj“
224
00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:07,963
j“ looks so lovely j“
225
00:18:11,091 --> 00:18:12,634
j“ sunshine j“
226
00:18:13,468 --> 00:18:15,636
j“ nearly always j“
227
00:18:15,637 --> 00:18:18,890
j“ makes me high j“
228
00:18:30,485 --> 00:18:32,862
Oh, what a place!
229
00:18:33,572 --> 00:18:34,614
What a place.
230
00:18:35,073 --> 00:18:37,367
All this and that view up there.
231
00:18:38,743 --> 00:18:41,036
- You've been up here all your life?
- No, no.
232
00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:42,496
I wish.
233
00:18:42,497 --> 00:18:44,416
No, I've been living in Riverdale.
234
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:46,543
But I was born in three forks.
235
00:18:46,918 --> 00:18:48,628
You know where three forks is?
236
00:18:49,337 --> 00:18:51,339
- It's on the Columbia river.
- Oh, I know.
237
00:18:51,715 --> 00:18:53,300
Well, I left home when I was 14.
238
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,302
- Oh, really?
- Mm-hmm.
239
00:18:58,847 --> 00:19:00,515
I was nervy little brat.
240
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:02,851
Oh, I know.
241
00:19:27,917 --> 00:19:28,917
Um...
242
00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:32,464
- I think I better tell you something.
- Ok.
243
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:36,968
Um, I think people oughta be totally
and utterly honest with each other.
244
00:19:37,427 --> 00:19:38,762
Oh, well...
245
00:19:39,346 --> 00:19:41,306
If I'm being totally and utterly honest.
246
00:19:41,765 --> 00:19:43,099
I want you...
247
00:19:43,892 --> 00:19:45,060
Something fierce.
248
00:19:48,229 --> 00:19:49,230
I'm pregnant.
249
00:20:01,285 --> 00:20:02,369
Who was it?
250
00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:06,122
Why does everybody always ask
that question first?
251
00:20:06,665 --> 00:20:08,750
It's a really dumb question.
252
00:20:09,084 --> 00:20:11,419
- Why don't you ask me if I'm happy?
- Was it Weaver?
253
00:20:11,628 --> 00:20:13,296
Are you kidding?
254
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:14,839
He's my cousin.
255
00:20:15,090 --> 00:20:16,299
And besides, I hate him.
256
00:20:17,884 --> 00:20:19,551
It's nobody from around here.
257
00:20:19,552 --> 00:20:20,512
Hmm.
258
00:20:20,513 --> 00:20:24,473
It's... it's somebody I'm married to
but I haven't seen him in months.
259
00:20:24,474 --> 00:20:28,269
His name is David and I married him
when I was 16 years old.
260
00:20:28,853 --> 00:20:32,941
And I guess I did it
'cause I wanted to show my mother.
261
00:20:34,109 --> 00:20:35,109
Hmm.
262
00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:37,529
And what about the baby?
263
00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:41,074
- Oh, well, that's a whole other trip.
- Oh.
264
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:43,325
You're gonna have it though.
You're gonna keep...
265
00:20:43,326 --> 00:20:44,953
Of course, I'm gonna keep it.
266
00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:49,416
I wanna be a mother more than anything
in the whole wide world.
267
00:20:49,958 --> 00:20:51,876
And you can't do that without as kid.
268
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:14,899
Good morning, mother.
269
00:21:15,442 --> 00:21:17,610
- Here she is.
- Oh, boy.
270
00:21:18,945 --> 00:21:21,823
Sit up there for me, will you?
Will you sit up a bit more?
271
00:21:22,866 --> 00:21:24,409
There you are.
272
00:21:25,744 --> 00:21:27,996
- Ok, she has...
- What did I do?
273
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:29,663
How do I do it?
274
00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:31,957
Are you comfortable there?
Watch out for the...
275
00:21:31,958 --> 00:21:34,168
Make sure you've got your arm
underherhead.
276
00:21:34,169 --> 00:21:35,961
- Oh, Sam.
- Gorgeous.
277
00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:37,046
Really?
278
00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:39,256
Hold your arm under her head.
Hold your arm under her head.
279
00:21:39,257 --> 00:21:40,924
How does she know what to do?
280
00:21:40,925 --> 00:21:41,926
Should I do that?
281
00:21:43,136 --> 00:21:45,013
She's working hard now.
282
00:21:45,305 --> 00:21:46,638
She'll fall asleep in a minute
283
00:21:46,639 --> 00:21:47,599
and don't let her little nose
284
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:49,349
- be touching something.
- Ok.
285
00:21:49,350 --> 00:21:51,561
- I'll let you two get to know one another.
- Ok.
286
00:21:54,898 --> 00:21:56,065
Wow.
287
00:21:57,066 --> 00:21:58,067
She looks...
288
00:21:58,860 --> 00:22:01,028
Sort of like Adolf Hitler,
don't you think?
289
00:22:01,029 --> 00:22:02,488
Sam, that's terrible!
290
00:22:02,489 --> 00:22:03,864
You Nazi.
291
00:22:03,865 --> 00:22:04,865
Does not.
292
00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:07,786
She looks like David.
293
00:22:11,456 --> 00:22:12,456
Well...
294
00:22:13,041 --> 00:22:14,333
She's pretty.
295
00:22:14,334 --> 00:22:16,669
Yeah, no, well, David...
Speaking of David.
296
00:22:17,295 --> 00:22:20,673
Uh, they give me the birth certificate.
297
00:22:21,299 --> 00:22:23,175
- Gave me...
- Sam, put that back on.
298
00:22:23,176 --> 00:22:26,094
Yeah, well, they gave me
the birth certificate to fill it out.
299
00:22:26,095 --> 00:22:30,307
And, uh, and under the name, you know,
where it said, where it said,
300
00:22:30,308 --> 00:22:31,600
"name of father",
301
00:22:31,601 --> 00:22:34,228
I... well, I didn't know
David's last name, see. So, I...
302
00:22:34,229 --> 00:22:36,689
So, I put Sam Hayden.
303
00:22:38,650 --> 00:22:40,860
Is that... is that... is that all right?
304
00:22:41,361 --> 00:22:43,071
Oh, Sam.
305
00:22:45,406 --> 00:22:46,824
Oh, wow.
306
00:22:46,825 --> 00:22:48,785
- It's...
- Ok.
307
00:22:59,128 --> 00:23:00,088
Hmm.
308
00:23:00,089 --> 00:23:01,840
- Hi, Dr. Wilde.
- Hi.
309
00:23:02,465 --> 00:23:04,091
Want some tapioca?
310
00:23:04,092 --> 00:23:05,384
Looks delicious.
311
00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:06,385
Come off it!
312
00:23:07,512 --> 00:23:08,512
There you go.
313
00:23:14,519 --> 00:23:16,645
You kids like it
straight from the shoulder, don't you?
314
00:23:16,646 --> 00:23:19,023
Tapioca, straight from the shoulder.
315
00:23:20,108 --> 00:23:22,569
- You know what I mean.
- Ok.
316
00:23:23,069 --> 00:23:25,655
You have something
called osteogenic sarcoma.
317
00:23:26,281 --> 00:23:27,657
It's a tumor on the bone.
318
00:23:29,951 --> 00:23:32,287
Well, some tumors aren't too bad, right?
319
00:23:32,704 --> 00:23:34,913
Right. This one's malignant.
320
00:23:34,914 --> 00:23:36,666
We need to stop it immediately.
321
00:23:36,875 --> 00:23:38,501
And I mean immediately.
322
00:23:38,877 --> 00:23:43,381
Now, I've rearranged about 25 schedules
so I can operate tomorrow.
323
00:23:44,257 --> 00:23:45,300
You see.
324
00:23:45,592 --> 00:23:51,263
Osteogenic sarcoma is a kind of cancer
that travels from bone to the lung.
325
00:23:51,264 --> 00:23:53,933
If we do not stop it in the bone,
we can't stop it in the lung.
326
00:23:55,602 --> 00:23:58,354
- Once it gets to the lung, I die, right?
- Right.
327
00:24:01,482 --> 00:24:03,860
And how do you take a tumor
out of the bone?
328
00:24:04,986 --> 00:24:06,195
We take off the bone.
329
00:24:07,322 --> 00:24:08,573
My leg?
330
00:24:10,992 --> 00:24:12,744
You wanna take my leg off?
331
00:24:13,077 --> 00:24:15,120
It's the best way
to get rid of the cancer.
332
00:24:15,121 --> 00:24:17,415
- No!
- Kate.
333
00:24:19,542 --> 00:24:21,418
It's the best way to stop the cancer.
334
00:24:21,419 --> 00:24:23,713
Quickly, cleanly and permanently.
335
00:24:24,297 --> 00:24:27,216
Look, why don't you sign these
and give them to the nurse?
336
00:24:27,383 --> 00:24:28,593
What do they say?
337
00:24:29,302 --> 00:24:31,304
That you'll give us permission to operate.
338
00:24:31,846 --> 00:24:36,559
I've gotta talk to Sam. I'm not gonna sign
any papers saying you can cut my leg off.
339
00:24:37,310 --> 00:24:39,227
Did you see him in the hallway?
340
00:24:39,228 --> 00:24:40,228
No, I didn't.
341
00:24:40,605 --> 00:24:42,023
Well, I've got to talk to him.
342
00:24:42,649 --> 00:24:45,026
Why is he never here when I need him?
343
00:24:54,702 --> 00:24:56,579
Can I borrow a dime?
344
00:25:18,393 --> 00:25:19,559
- Hi.
- It's about time.
345
00:25:19,560 --> 00:25:21,770
- Why?
- Why weren't you here?
346
00:25:21,771 --> 00:25:24,231
- What?
- I needed you and you were not here.
347
00:25:24,232 --> 00:25:26,483
- Wait a minute!
- You're never here when I need you.
348
00:25:26,484 --> 00:25:27,985
What are you talking about?
I just got here.
349
00:25:27,986 --> 00:25:29,903
Would you slow down, please, Kate?
350
00:25:29,904 --> 00:25:31,781
Just tell me what's goin' on!
351
00:25:32,198 --> 00:25:33,157
Please?
352
00:25:33,158 --> 00:25:36,077
- What is going on? Shh!
- They wanna amputate my leg.
353
00:25:38,830 --> 00:25:39,830
Tomorrow.
354
00:25:40,540 --> 00:25:41,707
Oh, come on.
355
00:25:41,708 --> 00:25:44,127
Big joke, right, Sam? Let's split.
356
00:25:45,878 --> 00:25:47,046
I've gotta think.
357
00:25:47,463 --> 00:25:49,465
I wanna go to the mountains.
358
00:25:52,176 --> 00:25:54,594
Hold on. What do they wanna
amputate your leg for?
359
00:25:54,595 --> 00:25:56,472
Because it's full of cancer!
360
00:26:00,101 --> 00:26:02,270
Take it easy but take it.
361
00:26:02,812 --> 00:26:04,980
That's one thing my mother taught me
to say
362
00:26:04,981 --> 00:26:07,483
when you encounter
those little daily falls.
363
00:26:08,317 --> 00:26:11,069
Take it easy, but take it.
364
00:26:11,070 --> 00:26:13,573
Take it!
365
00:26:20,955 --> 00:26:24,791
You know, Dr. Wilde said
some pretty heavy things back there.
366
00:26:24,792 --> 00:26:26,752
Well, Dr. Wilde is a freak.
367
00:26:26,753 --> 00:26:29,337
Yeah, maybe we should get another doctor.
368
00:26:29,338 --> 00:26:31,174
I don't wanna talk about it.
369
00:26:31,841 --> 00:26:34,469
You know, there's gotta be
other kinds of treatment.
370
00:26:37,263 --> 00:26:40,724
You know, there's this great
cancer clinic in Vancouver.
371
00:26:40,725 --> 00:26:42,601
- Vancouver?
- Yeah.
372
00:26:42,602 --> 00:26:44,895
Couple of hundred miles.
What's a couple of hundred miles?
373
00:26:44,896 --> 00:26:47,689
Couple of hundred miles?
I wanna stay right there.
374
00:26:47,690 --> 00:26:50,860
Exactly like this for the rest of my life.
375
00:26:52,987 --> 00:26:56,616
So, I'm happy and... Shut up!
376
00:26:57,492 --> 00:26:59,243
Want a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?
377
00:27:00,411 --> 00:27:03,121
I want some peace and quiet.
378
00:27:03,122 --> 00:27:05,708
One peace and quiet on rye!
379
00:27:08,836 --> 00:27:10,671
Oh, no, no, no.
380
00:27:13,091 --> 00:27:15,842
That's too much. Beautiful.
381
00:27:17,011 --> 00:27:18,221
She weighs a ton.
382
00:27:18,596 --> 00:27:20,305
Ok, so we're going tomorrow.
383
00:27:20,306 --> 00:27:21,808
To the clinic.
384
00:27:22,225 --> 00:27:23,226
Not me.
385
00:27:33,945 --> 00:27:34,945
Peace!
386
00:27:35,988 --> 00:27:37,073
Hello.
387
00:27:38,449 --> 00:27:40,700
Oh, what's your name?
Or that's a multiple choice,
388
00:27:40,701 --> 00:27:42,537
you can pick whatever you want.
389
00:27:44,163 --> 00:27:45,539
It's David.
390
00:27:45,540 --> 00:27:46,540
David?
391
00:27:46,791 --> 00:27:48,000
David!
392
00:27:48,209 --> 00:27:52,088
That can't be David. He doesn't have
four heads and green, scaly skin.
393
00:27:53,714 --> 00:27:56,300
- What'd you come up here for?
- To see my child.
394
00:28:00,388 --> 00:28:02,473
She's not yours. She's mine.
395
00:28:03,182 --> 00:28:05,267
Well, come in. Have dinner.
396
00:28:05,268 --> 00:28:06,268
Be civilized.
397
00:28:11,023 --> 00:28:13,109
Do you know how I found about the baby?
398
00:28:13,526 --> 00:28:14,985
Your mother told me about it.
399
00:28:14,986 --> 00:28:17,070
It never occurred to her
that I didn't know.
400
00:28:17,071 --> 00:28:19,157
She's a little dense sometimes.
401
00:28:21,450 --> 00:28:23,202
I signed the divorce papers.
402
00:28:23,911 --> 00:28:26,581
You only have for like a year,
haven't you?
403
00:28:27,165 --> 00:28:29,834
But I signed 'em before I knew
about the child.
404
00:28:30,126 --> 00:28:32,169
- Jill.
- Sam.
405
00:28:32,170 --> 00:28:35,213
"The child" this, "the child" that.
She's got a name. Her name is Jill.
406
00:28:35,214 --> 00:28:36,673
You don't have to tell him.
407
00:28:36,674 --> 00:28:39,009
Jill Patricia Hayden.
408
00:28:39,010 --> 00:28:41,303
Jill for her... Come here.
409
00:28:41,304 --> 00:28:44,139
Jill for her paternal great grandmother.
410
00:28:44,140 --> 00:28:45,807
Uh, Patricia for Kate's sister.
411
00:28:45,808 --> 00:28:47,810
And Hayden for me.
412
00:28:49,145 --> 00:28:50,145
Yeah.
413
00:28:50,771 --> 00:28:54,400
You do sort of look like her, you know?
Kate said you did when she was born.
414
00:28:54,775 --> 00:28:56,944
Oh. Here, you wanna hold her for me?
415
00:28:57,570 --> 00:29:00,364
And I'll try to get Kate.
416
00:29:12,376 --> 00:29:14,002
Now, it ought to be possible,
417
00:29:14,003 --> 00:29:15,731
Theoretically speaking, at least,
418
00:29:15,755 --> 00:29:19,799
for two people to love one another
and then not love one another
419
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,176
and still converse with each other.
420
00:29:21,177 --> 00:29:23,637
I mean, after all, they're still people.
421
00:29:23,638 --> 00:29:25,305
They can still talk.
422
00:29:25,306 --> 00:29:28,976
- Still be honest with one another, huh?
- Deal with the upfront.
423
00:29:29,227 --> 00:29:33,104
Forget the hurt. Just like it was
another examination to get through.
424
00:29:33,105 --> 00:29:35,774
- You're wasting your breath.
- No, no, no, my dear!
425
00:29:35,775 --> 00:29:37,609
Never let it be said!
426
00:29:37,610 --> 00:29:41,571
That a man who quests for love,
peace and understanding.
427
00:29:41,572 --> 00:29:45,033
J“ be it ever so humble j“
428
00:29:45,034 --> 00:29:49,246
scale-wise speaking that is,
quests in vain.
429
00:29:49,247 --> 00:29:51,289
- What's he on?
- Nothing.
430
00:29:51,290 --> 00:29:53,960
- He just gets this way.
- Spooky.
431
00:29:54,835 --> 00:29:56,295
I like it.
432
00:30:00,883 --> 00:30:03,051
Oh, yeah, listen, I noticed
when you were driving up
433
00:30:03,052 --> 00:30:04,929
that your car was packed. Uh...
434
00:30:05,429 --> 00:30:06,638
You going some place.
435
00:30:06,639 --> 00:30:08,516
Home and the university.
436
00:30:09,100 --> 00:30:11,518
- I talked to a lawyer.
- You're into that, huh?
437
00:30:11,519 --> 00:30:12,603
What are you studying?
438
00:30:13,271 --> 00:30:14,438
Geology.
439
00:30:14,730 --> 00:30:16,232
I talked to a lawyer.
440
00:30:16,732 --> 00:30:19,109
Not telling me you were pregnant
when you filed for divorce
441
00:30:19,110 --> 00:30:22,405
is what they call an omission
of a material fact.
442
00:30:23,990 --> 00:30:28,202
Which means that I don't have
to give you the divorce.
443
00:30:28,536 --> 00:30:30,788
And I can get custody of the child.
444
00:30:32,206 --> 00:30:33,665
Over my dead body.
445
00:30:33,666 --> 00:30:35,625
Oh, what do you want her for, anyway?
446
00:30:35,626 --> 00:30:36,751
Man, you don't look
like the maternal type...
447
00:30:36,752 --> 00:30:39,588
I'm not saying I want her,
I'm saying I can have her.
448
00:30:41,299 --> 00:30:43,341
I see what you meant about this guy.
449
00:30:43,342 --> 00:30:45,719
Frankly I don't know why you want custody.
450
00:30:45,720 --> 00:30:48,305
I don't know
why you didn't get an abortion.
451
00:30:48,306 --> 00:30:51,933
All I heard from her for
a year and a half is, "I'm trapped,
452
00:30:51,934 --> 00:30:54,102
this is a mistake. Let me out.
453
00:30:54,103 --> 00:30:57,063
I hate making your bed
and ironing your shirts.
454
00:30:57,064 --> 00:31:00,817
I hate responsibility.
Any and all kinds of responsibility.
455
00:31:00,818 --> 00:31:02,236
- I'm not ready."
- Stop it.
456
00:31:02,611 --> 00:31:03,945
-And here you are, taking care of a house,
-shut up!
457
00:31:03,946 --> 00:31:06,532
A man and his child. What happened?
458
00:31:08,034 --> 00:31:10,744
- I wear sweatshirts.
- I grew up.
459
00:31:10,745 --> 00:31:12,579
Yeah, sure. For five minutes.
460
00:31:12,580 --> 00:31:15,206
Until some other life style
strikes your fancy.
461
00:31:15,207 --> 00:31:16,708
That's not really fair.
462
00:31:16,709 --> 00:31:19,753
It's not really fair to raise a child
on alfalfa sprouts and marijuana.
463
00:31:19,754 --> 00:31:22,130
I'm not raising her
on alfalfa sprouts and marijuana.
464
00:31:22,131 --> 00:31:23,673
I'll give you the divorce,
if you'll give me the child.
465
00:31:23,674 --> 00:31:25,258
- I'll raise her right.
- You'll raise her?
466
00:31:25,259 --> 00:31:27,385
- My mother will. You like her.
- Your mother will!
467
00:31:27,386 --> 00:31:29,220
- She'll raise her right, won't she?
- I'm not gonna listen to any more of this.
468
00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:32,015
Then you'll have everything you've
always wanted. Freedom. A new start!
469
00:31:32,016 --> 00:31:34,894
- No responsibilities!
- Well, I'll tell you something.
470
00:31:35,686 --> 00:31:37,355
Jill needs Kate.
471
00:31:38,230 --> 00:31:40,941
And Kate needs Jill
and I need both of them.
472
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:42,400
Now.
473
00:31:43,527 --> 00:31:45,987
What's it gonna take
to make you understand that.
474
00:31:45,988 --> 00:31:47,238
Let's go outside.
475
00:31:47,239 --> 00:31:48,406
David, you're acting
like a ten year old!
476
00:31:48,407 --> 00:31:49,617
You stay out of this!
477
00:31:49,867 --> 00:31:52,078
High noonsville.
478
00:31:58,459 --> 00:32:00,127
Before we punch it out, David.
479
00:32:00,461 --> 00:32:03,005
I just think that I should tell you
that...
480
00:32:03,714 --> 00:32:04,965
People change.
481
00:32:05,716 --> 00:32:08,928
The only thing Kate wants out of life now
is to be a good mother.
482
00:32:09,929 --> 00:32:12,223
Well, "only", I say "only".
483
00:32:12,473 --> 00:32:13,473
That's number one.
484
00:32:13,724 --> 00:32:17,436
And number two is, is she has cancer.
485
00:32:24,652 --> 00:32:26,028
- You serious.
- Yeah.
486
00:32:35,121 --> 00:32:36,455
How extensive is it?
487
00:32:37,081 --> 00:32:39,917
They wanna amputate her leg.
488
00:32:40,167 --> 00:32:41,794
Oh, my god.
489
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:49,676
What about the baby? What about Jill?
490
00:32:49,677 --> 00:32:52,011
Well, they'll cure it
if she has Jill, see.
491
00:32:52,012 --> 00:32:54,557
They'll have to. She won't let them not.
492
00:32:55,057 --> 00:32:57,475
Because Jill's not a burden to her.
493
00:32:57,476 --> 00:33:01,522
She's not a restriction on her freedom.
Jill's her life.
494
00:33:22,751 --> 00:33:23,751
It's yours.
495
00:33:24,378 --> 00:33:25,378
Thank you.
496
00:33:28,549 --> 00:33:29,800
You're crazy.
497
00:33:42,438 --> 00:33:48,027
J“ yes, I've been dreaming
about you every day j“
498
00:33:49,236 --> 00:33:52,031
j“ each and every day j“
499
00:33:54,658 --> 00:34:00,414
j“ and I've been thinking
about you all night long j“
500
00:34:01,123 --> 00:34:04,168
j“ I even wrote a song j“
501
00:34:06,837 --> 00:34:11,717
j“ just to let you
know how I really feel j“
502
00:34:13,093 --> 00:34:18,224
j“ to make you
understand my love is real j“
503
00:34:18,474 --> 00:34:22,477
j“ that you're on my mind all the time j“
504
00:34:22,478 --> 00:34:23,645
j“ I wish to god... j“
505
00:34:23,646 --> 00:34:25,064
ls Sam Hayden there?
506
00:34:27,650 --> 00:34:30,528
Well, if he shows up,
will you tell him that Kate called?
507
00:34:31,278 --> 00:34:32,530
"Kate."
508
00:34:33,697 --> 00:34:36,783
- Ok. Thank you.
- What are you doing out here?
509
00:34:36,784 --> 00:34:39,661
You're not supposed to be up. I told you
to keep your weight off that knee.
510
00:34:39,662 --> 00:34:41,079
- Come on.
- How come they put a woman in charge
511
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:43,540
of the whole cancer section.
Because it's hopeless?
512
00:34:43,541 --> 00:34:45,250
Because this is the children's wing.
513
00:34:45,251 --> 00:34:48,336
Children who don't stay in bed
when they are told to stay in bed.
514
00:34:48,337 --> 00:34:50,255
- My bottom gets sore.
- I'm gonna have them bring you
515
00:34:50,256 --> 00:34:53,551
- a terrific crutch.
- I can hardly wait.
516
00:35:05,104 --> 00:35:07,022
Is Sam Hayden there?
517
00:35:08,691 --> 00:35:11,527
Well, if he shows up, will you tell him
that Kate called?
518
00:35:12,486 --> 00:35:14,738
No, I already tried that number.
519
00:35:16,907 --> 00:35:18,784
I tried that number, too.
520
00:35:19,910 --> 00:35:22,162
Uh, never mind. Ok?
521
00:35:22,705 --> 00:35:25,666
Sure looks like you could
use some music, little lady.
522
00:35:26,083 --> 00:35:28,751
I can't make any sensible decision
without you, Sam.
523
00:35:28,752 --> 00:35:30,044
And you're never here.
524
00:35:30,045 --> 00:35:33,464
And this morning, I was always
hanging around, getting on your nerves.
525
00:35:33,465 --> 00:35:34,799
- Quote, unquote.
- Any idiot could've figured out
526
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:37,135
that I didn't need you
while I was going through my tests.
527
00:35:38,429 --> 00:35:41,472
J“ any idiot could have figured out... j“
528
00:35:41,473 --> 00:35:43,934
can you stop hiding
behind that stupid guitar?
529
00:35:45,894 --> 00:35:49,105
Listen, how much longer, how much
more money do you think I can borrow
530
00:35:49,106 --> 00:35:51,608
from my parents, Kate? I gotta get a job.
531
00:35:51,609 --> 00:35:53,986
You can get a job any day
of the week you want.
532
00:35:54,278 --> 00:35:56,321
Mopping floors, washing dishes.
533
00:35:56,322 --> 00:35:57,488
- Driving a truck.
- Mmm.
534
00:35:57,489 --> 00:35:59,198
- But you don't want a job.
- Idont, huh?
535
00:35:59,199 --> 00:36:00,617
- Can I come into the room, please?
- You just wanna split
536
00:36:00,618 --> 00:36:02,458
from this whole scene.
No, why don't you leave?
537
00:36:03,454 --> 00:36:05,371
You can't take it.
538
00:36:05,372 --> 00:36:06,373
I can't take it?
539
00:36:06,749 --> 00:36:09,792
I've been sleeping at the foot of your bed
ever since you checked in the hospital.
540
00:36:09,793 --> 00:36:12,045
- Can't take it.
- You can't sleep anywhere else for free.
541
00:36:12,046 --> 00:36:14,048
I don't... I don't believe you.
542
00:36:16,634 --> 00:36:18,217
What are you gonna be?
543
00:36:18,218 --> 00:36:20,804
When you grow up, you fat old thing?
544
00:36:22,681 --> 00:36:24,141
Tall blonde and beautiful, huh?
545
00:36:24,475 --> 00:36:26,267
Kate, don't let her nurse.
546
00:36:26,268 --> 00:36:27,685
Get me a nursing bottle.
547
00:36:27,686 --> 00:36:29,771
Why? The doctors in spokane
said it was ok.
548
00:36:29,772 --> 00:36:32,649
Because you have radioactive iodine in you
from the tests.
549
00:36:32,650 --> 00:36:34,108
- Now, take her off that breast...
- I don't wanna...
550
00:36:34,109 --> 00:36:35,276
- It can be passed in milk.
- Wean her yet.
551
00:36:35,277 --> 00:36:36,986
You want me to do it?
You want me to do it?
552
00:36:36,987 --> 00:36:38,363
I want you to leave.
553
00:36:38,364 --> 00:36:42,076
"I need you. Why aren't you ever here
when I need you?"
554
00:36:42,451 --> 00:36:45,578
Right, sit up and all you have to do
is hold her as you would nursing.
555
00:36:45,579 --> 00:36:47,914
May I have the bottle? Thank you.
556
00:36:47,915 --> 00:36:50,708
All right, give her the bottle
and don't upset yourself for her.
557
00:36:50,709 --> 00:36:52,377
I can't do it. I don't wanna wean her yet.
558
00:36:52,378 --> 00:36:54,337
- You want me to do it?
- No.
559
00:36:54,338 --> 00:36:56,005
She's used to the breast from you.
560
00:36:56,006 --> 00:36:58,716
She might take the bottle better
from her father. Try it.
561
00:36:58,717 --> 00:37:01,636
He's not her father. He's not my husband.
562
00:37:01,637 --> 00:37:05,223
- He's just some creep off the street.
- I see.
563
00:37:05,224 --> 00:37:07,851
Well, all right then, let me try it.
564
00:37:08,227 --> 00:37:11,355
I suppose you haven't discussed
your treatment with him either, have you?
565
00:37:11,689 --> 00:37:14,023
- I just hang out for laughs.
- We noticed.
566
00:37:14,024 --> 00:37:16,901
The generally accepted way
to treat osteogenic sarcoma
567
00:37:16,902 --> 00:37:18,486
is by amputation.
568
00:37:18,487 --> 00:37:20,321
You remove the cancerous part.
569
00:37:20,322 --> 00:37:23,408
If it hasn't spread to any other parts
of the body, it's the best solution.
570
00:37:23,409 --> 00:37:25,660
Yes, come.
571
00:37:25,661 --> 00:37:26,953
He's not interested.
572
00:37:26,954 --> 00:37:29,455
I am too interested. Would you shut up?
573
00:37:29,456 --> 00:37:32,250
The scanner showed that it hadn't spread.
I think that's amazing
574
00:37:32,251 --> 00:37:34,210
considering how long you waited.
575
00:37:34,211 --> 00:37:36,547
- You're not cutting off my leg.
- May I continue?
576
00:37:37,506 --> 00:37:41,343
The other possibility is radiation
and chemotherapy.
577
00:37:41,552 --> 00:37:44,846
Right, which will make my leg to break
and my hair to fall out
578
00:37:44,847 --> 00:37:46,764
and diarrhea and nausea.
579
00:37:46,765 --> 00:37:48,474
Possibly, but I don't think
you can compare
580
00:37:48,475 --> 00:37:50,893
losing you hair
with losing your leg, Kate.
581
00:37:50,894 --> 00:37:52,812
Well, it's a lousy trip either way.
582
00:37:52,813 --> 00:37:55,356
So, why don't we just
skip the whole thing?
583
00:37:55,357 --> 00:37:57,067
That's suicide.
584
00:37:57,443 --> 00:37:59,444
All these other horrible things
that she's gonna do to me
585
00:37:59,445 --> 00:38:00,653
and there's no guarantees.
586
00:38:00,654 --> 00:38:03,115
No guarantees but a little more time.
587
00:38:03,615 --> 00:38:05,200
A little more time for this one.
588
00:38:06,034 --> 00:38:08,954
It's what you wanted, I thought.
To be a mother.
589
00:38:09,163 --> 00:38:11,497
I don't know what I want any more.
590
00:38:11,498 --> 00:38:14,793
Except to be left alone
just to figure things out.
591
00:38:16,211 --> 00:38:19,631
Do you think this is happening to me
because I was born on the 13th?
592
00:38:20,549 --> 00:38:22,801
Or because I ran away from home?
593
00:38:23,051 --> 00:38:24,969
Do you believe in retribution?
594
00:38:24,970 --> 00:38:27,556
Nobody I know believes in... ugh...
595
00:38:29,892 --> 00:38:32,185
I don't wanna be a temporary mother
for a year or two.
596
00:38:32,186 --> 00:38:34,855
I wanna be a mother
until I'm a grandmother.
597
00:38:36,398 --> 00:38:38,775
And I can't learn to walk
on one leg
598
00:38:38,776 --> 00:38:41,068
while Jill's learning to walk on two.
599
00:38:41,069 --> 00:38:43,321
I won't. It's not fair to Jill.
600
00:38:43,322 --> 00:38:46,074
And what does all that mean
in practical terms, Kate?
601
00:38:47,034 --> 00:38:50,077
It means she wants to wake up
tomorrow morning with no cancer.
602
00:38:50,078 --> 00:38:52,497
And three legs please.
Certainly no less than two.
603
00:38:52,498 --> 00:38:53,749
Mmm.
604
00:38:54,750 --> 00:38:56,126
All right. Then.
605
00:38:56,960 --> 00:38:59,837
We will start radiation treatments
in the morning.
606
00:38:59,838 --> 00:39:01,006
There you go.
607
00:39:04,092 --> 00:39:07,136
Would you two call a truce
if I sent in two dinners?
608
00:39:07,137 --> 00:39:08,722
-Yes.
609
00:39:10,140 --> 00:39:11,558
I'm not hungry.
610
00:39:11,850 --> 00:39:13,811
You behave yourself.
611
00:39:24,905 --> 00:39:27,991
Why is everything all tangled up,
all of a sudden?
612
00:39:30,285 --> 00:39:32,287
I don't know.
613
00:39:37,501 --> 00:39:38,961
Well, I love ya.
614
00:39:40,337 --> 00:39:42,673
- Did you forget that?
- No.
615
00:39:45,676 --> 00:39:47,594
It's just that...
616
00:39:48,595 --> 00:39:50,556
Come on, say it. Tell me, tell me.
617
00:39:51,098 --> 00:39:52,640
I'm scared.
618
00:39:52,641 --> 00:39:54,475
Oh... I know.
619
00:39:54,476 --> 00:39:58,646
I know you're scared. I am scared, too.
Everybody is scared all the time.
620
00:39:58,647 --> 00:40:01,066
Inside. Everybody. Always.
621
00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:04,902
Well, maybe she's wrong.
Maybe there's somebody else.
622
00:40:04,903 --> 00:40:07,697
Somewhere else, who can give us
a different answer.
623
00:40:07,698 --> 00:40:09,949
Radiation. I don't want to be full
of radiation.
624
00:40:09,950 --> 00:40:13,370
I'll be afraid to touch my child.
625
00:40:14,246 --> 00:40:15,998
I'm afraid I'll contaminate her.
626
00:40:19,126 --> 00:40:21,961
That's as bad as cutting off my leg.
627
00:40:21,962 --> 00:40:24,965
But I don't have the money
to go any place else.
628
00:40:26,341 --> 00:40:27,718
And you don't have the time.
629
00:40:30,304 --> 00:40:34,265
This is the best cancer hospital
in the whole northwest.
630
00:40:34,266 --> 00:40:36,267
And Dr. Gillman is the head of it.
631
00:40:36,268 --> 00:40:40,147
At least, this part of it.
She's got to know something. Right?
632
00:40:41,356 --> 00:40:44,151
We've just gotta trust her, baby.
633
00:40:45,986 --> 00:40:47,279
And each other.
634
00:40:48,196 --> 00:40:50,365
I don't know, it just seems like...
635
00:40:50,866 --> 00:40:55,245
Ninety-nine percent
of this whole strange scene is trust.
636
00:40:57,164 --> 00:41:00,584
Who are you auditioning for this
afternoon, Norman Vincent peale?
637
00:41:07,549 --> 00:41:10,259
All right. Ok.
638
00:41:10,260 --> 00:41:11,637
Now tell me to leave.
639
00:41:12,179 --> 00:41:13,555
-Leave.
640
00:41:13,722 --> 00:41:15,723
Mean it.
641
00:41:15,724 --> 00:41:17,684
- I couldn't. Not in a million years.
- Blah...
642
00:41:19,186 --> 00:41:20,561
All right, good.
643
00:41:21,688 --> 00:41:25,442
J“ lady, are you crying? J“
644
00:41:26,652 --> 00:41:32,449
j“ do the tears belong to me j“
645
00:41:33,700 --> 00:41:36,160
j“ do you think j“
646
00:41:36,161 --> 00:41:42,083
j“ our time together is all gone j“
647
00:41:42,084 --> 00:41:46,837
oh, yeah. You know, the divorce papers
were in the mail this morning.
648
00:41:46,838 --> 00:41:49,382
Wow! Where's the champagne?
649
00:41:49,383 --> 00:41:51,593
I'm saving it for the wedding.
650
00:41:53,804 --> 00:41:59,308
J“ I'm as close as I can be j“
651
00:41:59,309 --> 00:42:00,977
wedding?
652
00:42:00,978 --> 00:42:02,979
Uh, in the great hereafter, I suppose.
653
00:42:02,980 --> 00:42:05,983
No tomorrow. After the first treatment.
654
00:42:06,441 --> 00:42:08,526
J“ has just begun j“
655
00:42:08,527 --> 00:42:12,196
well, my mother used to get us milkshakes
after the dentist.
656
00:42:12,197 --> 00:42:14,366
This is for real.
657
00:42:14,866 --> 00:42:20,080
J“ close your eyes and rest j“
658
00:42:20,247 --> 00:42:23,207
j“ your weary mind j“
659
00:42:23,208 --> 00:42:26,669
- we're getting married in the hospital?
- Yeah.
660
00:42:26,670 --> 00:42:27,629
Yeah.
661
00:42:27,630 --> 00:42:30,631
No, Weaver and I met this guy
at this audition.
662
00:42:30,632 --> 00:42:33,760
And, uh, he studied to be a rabbi once.
663
00:42:34,177 --> 00:42:37,472
Do you want to be married
by an almost rabbi?
664
00:42:37,764 --> 00:42:39,557
My mother will flip out!
665
00:42:39,558 --> 00:42:42,518
Oh, no, he's beautiful, he's beautiful.
He looks like Moses.
666
00:42:42,519 --> 00:42:44,061
He's a 100 feet tall.
667
00:42:44,062 --> 00:42:45,688
Except his beard is shorter.
668
00:42:45,689 --> 00:42:48,275
No, he will... he'll keep me humble.
669
00:42:50,360 --> 00:42:54,364
J“ became entwined j“
670
00:42:55,866 --> 00:42:56,866
um...
671
00:42:58,035 --> 00:43:00,078
Are you serious.
672
00:43:01,079 --> 00:43:02,830
J“ that you could know j“
673
00:43:02,831 --> 00:43:03,998
j“ how much... j“
674
00:43:03,999 --> 00:43:04,958
is it legal?
675
00:43:04,959 --> 00:43:08,836
J“ I love you j“
676
00:43:08,837 --> 00:43:11,130
no, well, probably not.
677
00:43:11,131 --> 00:43:16,386
No, but I'll have a justice of peace
waiting in the wings, just in case.
678
00:43:17,929 --> 00:43:23,310
J“ I'm as close as I can be j“
679
00:43:23,477 --> 00:43:25,562
how come now, huh?
680
00:43:26,354 --> 00:43:30,275
I mean, marrying me is like betting
on a three-legged horse.
681
00:43:30,984 --> 00:43:33,360
- You can't win.
- Oh, you can, though.
682
00:43:33,361 --> 00:43:34,820
Yeah, you can.
683
00:43:34,821 --> 00:43:38,700
If you have a strange thing
for three-legged horses.
684
00:43:40,035 --> 00:43:40,994
Oh, Sam!
685
00:43:40,995 --> 00:43:43,747
J“ lady, my sweet lady j“
686
00:43:45,082 --> 00:43:47,666
j“ I'm as close as... j“
687
00:43:52,297 --> 00:43:54,925
J“ and I... j“
688
00:43:55,801 --> 00:43:58,678
J“ our time... j“
689
00:44:36,466 --> 00:44:39,176
Weaver...
690
00:44:39,177 --> 00:44:40,344
Hey, Sam. Have you got the ring?
691
00:44:40,345 --> 00:44:41,554
- Yes.
- Good.
692
00:44:41,555 --> 00:44:43,305
Now, come over here. Right?
693
00:44:43,306 --> 00:44:46,434
Put the ring on her right hand,
index finger.
694
00:44:49,855 --> 00:44:53,607
Beautiful women invariably fall
for dumb men.
695
00:44:53,608 --> 00:44:57,361
Now, I told you put it on her right hand.
Index finger.
696
00:44:57,362 --> 00:44:58,321
- You got that?
- Yes.
697
00:44:58,322 --> 00:44:59,781
Ok, stand over here.
698
00:45:00,657 --> 00:45:02,491
Right here. Face her. Good.
699
00:45:02,492 --> 00:45:06,705
Now, put it on her right hand,
index finger. Beautiful.
700
00:45:07,038 --> 00:45:09,040
Now you switch it to l3.
701
00:45:11,918 --> 00:45:13,711
- It's ritual.
- Oh.
702
00:45:13,712 --> 00:45:15,297
Come on, Weaver.
703
00:45:15,797 --> 00:45:17,590
Ok, now, pay attention.
704
00:45:17,591 --> 00:45:19,383
Because this is the crux
of the whole thing right here.
705
00:45:19,384 --> 00:45:22,971
This is the heart. The soul.
The foundation.
706
00:45:23,513 --> 00:45:25,098
Now, repeat after me.
707
00:45:25,473 --> 00:45:31,479
Behold, you are consecrated unto me
by this ring.
708
00:45:31,897 --> 00:45:35,983
And note, consecrated means
that she becomes holy.
709
00:45:35,984 --> 00:45:37,044
Huh?
710
00:45:37,068 --> 00:45:40,864
An object of reverence and utmost regard.
It's heavy stuff.
711
00:45:41,031 --> 00:45:42,031
Hmm.
712
00:45:42,490 --> 00:45:45,076
- Ok. Time to drink.
- Oh.
713
00:45:45,702 --> 00:45:47,078
Weaver, a minor.
714
00:45:57,005 --> 00:46:00,175
J“ blessed art thou, o lord our god j“
715
00:46:00,383 --> 00:46:03,803
j“ who has created man and woman j“
716
00:46:04,095 --> 00:46:06,847
j“ who has created earth and sky j“
717
00:46:06,848 --> 00:46:08,307
j“ that's enough j“
718
00:46:08,308 --> 00:46:12,979
j“ who has created brotherhood and joy j“
719
00:46:17,859 --> 00:46:19,276
step on it.
720
00:46:19,277 --> 00:46:22,529
- You mean, break, break the glass?
- Smash it. Come on.
721
00:46:24,658 --> 00:46:26,408
Yee-haw!
722
00:46:34,876 --> 00:46:36,293
And note, note.
723
00:46:36,294 --> 00:46:39,588
As impossible as it would
be to put this glass back together,
724
00:46:39,589 --> 00:46:43,510
so it is impossible for you two
to live apart from one another. Huh?
725
00:46:44,052 --> 00:46:46,345
You almost missed the whole thing,
sleepy head.
726
00:46:46,346 --> 00:46:48,765
Hey, sleepyhead.
727
00:46:49,015 --> 00:46:51,184
A minor again?
728
00:46:51,393 --> 00:46:54,812
J“ banish, o lord, both grief and wrath j“
729
00:46:54,813 --> 00:46:57,523
j“ that the dumb may exult in song j“
730
00:46:57,524 --> 00:47:00,734
j“ with the sanction of those present
we will bless our god j“
731
00:47:00,735 --> 00:47:05,323
j“ in whose abode is joy
through whose goodness we live j“
732
00:47:05,824 --> 00:47:08,367
now, repeat after me.
733
00:47:08,368 --> 00:47:09,911
With feeling, if possible.
734
00:47:10,495 --> 00:47:12,037
Blessed be our god.
735
00:47:12,038 --> 00:47:13,790
Blessed be our god.
736
00:47:14,833 --> 00:47:18,043
Louder. Come on. In whose abode is joy.
737
00:47:18,044 --> 00:47:19,920
In whose abode is joy!
738
00:47:19,921 --> 00:47:21,672
That's better, ok.
739
00:47:21,673 --> 00:47:23,257
Through whose goodness we live.
740
00:47:23,258 --> 00:47:25,259
Through whose goodness we live.
741
00:47:25,260 --> 00:47:27,720
Of whose bounty we have partaken.
742
00:47:27,721 --> 00:47:29,763
Of whose bounty we have partaken.
743
00:47:29,764 --> 00:47:30,931
Terrific.
744
00:47:30,932 --> 00:47:32,474
Terrific!
745
00:47:32,475 --> 00:47:33,475
No, that's it.
746
00:47:35,478 --> 00:47:39,441
J“ put your hand in the hand of the man
who stilled the water j“
747
00:47:40,317 --> 00:47:43,987
j“ put your hand in the hand of the man
who calmed the sea j“
748
00:47:45,155 --> 00:47:47,114
j“ take a look at yourself j“
749
00:47:47,115 --> 00:47:49,909
j“ and you can look
at others differently j“
750
00:47:50,660 --> 00:47:54,289
j“ put your hand in the hand of the man
from galilee j“
751
00:47:58,126 --> 00:48:02,005
j“ put your hand in the hand of the man
who stilled the water j“
752
00:48:03,173 --> 00:48:07,093
j“ put your hand in the hand of the man
who calmed the sea j“
753
00:48:08,261 --> 00:48:09,845
j“ take a look at yourself j“
754
00:48:09,846 --> 00:48:13,016
j“ and you can look
at others differently j“
755
00:48:13,391 --> 00:48:17,937
j“ put your hand in the hand of the man
from galilee j“
756
00:48:25,445 --> 00:48:27,571
- Oh. Sam.
- Welcome home.
757
00:48:27,572 --> 00:48:29,698
- Which one is it?
- Right here, with the screen
758
00:48:29,699 --> 00:48:31,408
and, uh, and the dirty windows.
759
00:48:31,409 --> 00:48:33,744
Oh, I've gotta get inside.
760
00:48:33,745 --> 00:48:36,205
- No, it's got indoor plumbing. Huh?
- Oh, Sam.
761
00:48:36,206 --> 00:48:39,209
Hot and cold, oh, yeah.
Hot and cold running water.
762
00:48:39,417 --> 00:48:41,711
- Not too many steps.
- Ah, baby don't cry.
763
00:48:42,128 --> 00:48:44,964
Close enough to the hospital to walk
when you're feeling stronger,
764
00:48:45,465 --> 00:48:48,384
the whole beautiful world
outside your living room door.
765
00:48:48,385 --> 00:48:49,426
Uh? Uh?
766
00:48:49,427 --> 00:48:52,180
- There's even a bay with the sailboats.
- Yeah.
767
00:48:52,639 --> 00:48:53,890
- It's beautiful.
- Oh!
768
00:48:58,770 --> 00:49:01,106
Oh, Sam.
769
00:49:01,314 --> 00:49:04,651
- Look at the size of this kitchen.
- There's more. There's much more.
770
00:49:05,985 --> 00:49:07,320
Oh, Sam.
771
00:49:07,529 --> 00:49:10,490
- But it's enormous.
- Yeah.
772
00:49:11,699 --> 00:49:12,826
Wow.
773
00:49:13,159 --> 00:49:17,204
- But can we afford it? Ok.
- Just let me worry about that please.
774
00:49:19,791 --> 00:49:20,792
I know.
775
00:49:22,419 --> 00:49:25,587
- We even have a John that works.
- Yep.
776
00:49:25,588 --> 00:49:28,550
Uh, the first thing I'm going to do
is make a rug.
777
00:49:28,925 --> 00:49:32,303
A rag rug and then
I'm gonna make a patchwork quilt.
778
00:49:33,930 --> 00:49:36,683
My grandmother taught me to do it
about a 100 years ago.
779
00:49:37,642 --> 00:49:39,936
I love it!
780
00:49:40,311 --> 00:49:41,646
Hi.
781
00:49:42,480 --> 00:49:44,398
Hi. I thought you children might need
some food.
782
00:49:44,399 --> 00:49:46,066
It's chicken and herbs,
the baby's gonna...
783
00:49:46,067 --> 00:49:47,694
Oh, that's the baby.
784
00:49:49,279 --> 00:49:51,071
Oh, hey, she's so pretty.
785
00:49:51,072 --> 00:49:52,489
Yeah, what's her name?
786
00:49:52,490 --> 00:49:54,241
- Jill.
- Jill.
787
00:49:54,242 --> 00:49:56,201
Right. I know you're really busy.
788
00:49:56,202 --> 00:49:57,870
But, hey, if you want to go out,
leave the baby with me.
789
00:49:57,871 --> 00:50:00,497
I'll take really good care of Jill.
I really will. I really love children.
790
00:50:00,498 --> 00:50:01,832
And if you Eve need anything,
stomp on the floor
791
00:50:01,833 --> 00:50:04,461
because I live in the basement.
It's sort of like a basement.
792
00:50:04,919 --> 00:50:08,465
Oh, uh, I'm Nora. See you later.
793
00:50:08,923 --> 00:50:09,924
Friend of yours?
794
00:50:10,133 --> 00:50:15,054
Uh, well, she lives downstairs,
and she runs a psychedelic shop, I think.
795
00:50:15,305 --> 00:50:17,347
Hi, dad. And then, upstairs,
796
00:50:17,348 --> 00:50:20,851
there's a family of Romanians
with a trampoline.
797
00:50:20,852 --> 00:50:22,352
Uh, they run a gym.
798
00:50:22,353 --> 00:50:25,647
Oh, you're going to love this.
799
00:50:25,648 --> 00:50:27,484
You're going to love this.
800
00:50:28,234 --> 00:50:30,111
You're going to...
801
00:50:33,114 --> 00:50:34,573
- What?
- Uh...
802
00:50:34,574 --> 00:50:37,784
- What? You want a pillow? Some water?
- No, just play me something. Ok?
803
00:50:37,785 --> 00:50:39,953
- No... are you su... are you... yeah?
- Uh-huh.
804
00:50:39,954 --> 00:50:41,498
Just play me a song.
805
00:50:41,831 --> 00:50:43,500
Ok. Hang on.
806
00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:50,298
I got one for ya.
807
00:50:57,931 --> 00:50:59,766
J“ sunshine j“
808
00:51:00,350 --> 00:51:04,646
j“ on my shoulders makes me happy j“
809
00:51:11,277 --> 00:51:13,571
J“ sunshine j“
810
00:51:13,947 --> 00:51:19,244
j“ almost always makes me high j“
811
00:51:19,702 --> 00:51:22,121
that was close.
812
00:51:23,289 --> 00:51:24,332
And...
813
00:51:24,874 --> 00:51:27,209
J“ sunshine j“
814
00:51:27,210 --> 00:51:29,461
j“ on the waterj“
815
00:51:29,462 --> 00:51:33,049
j“ looks so lovely j“
816
00:51:37,887 --> 00:51:40,389
J“ sunshine j“
817
00:51:40,390 --> 00:51:43,642
j“ almost always j“
818
00:51:43,643 --> 00:51:46,771
j“ makes me high j“
819
00:51:47,355 --> 00:51:48,398
oh!
820
00:51:51,568 --> 00:51:56,113
J“ if I had a song j“
821
00:51:56,114 --> 00:52:01,536
j“ that I could sing for you j“
822
00:52:05,081 --> 00:52:07,417
j“ I 'd sing a song j“
823
00:52:08,334 --> 00:52:14,132
j“ sure to make you smile j“
824
00:52:14,299 --> 00:52:15,382
I didn't know
if you'd sing that line.
825
00:52:15,383 --> 00:52:18,885
I didn't either. No, no, no, no.
826
00:52:18,886 --> 00:52:20,470
J“ if I had a... j“
827
00:52:20,471 --> 00:52:21,638
oh, what's wrong?
828
00:52:21,639 --> 00:52:23,266
J“ a wish j“
829
00:52:23,558 --> 00:52:27,687
J“ that I could wish for you j“
830
00:52:31,899 --> 00:52:34,276
j“ I 'd make a wish j“
831
00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:41,618
J“ take me home, country roads j“
832
00:52:46,372 --> 00:52:48,416
J“ gather round her j“
833
00:52:49,292 --> 00:52:53,504
j“ miner's lady, stranger to blue water j“
834
00:53:06,809 --> 00:53:11,146
J“ I love you all night long j“
835
00:53:11,147 --> 00:53:15,651
j“ and it's goodbye again j“
836
00:53:15,652 --> 00:53:19,488
j“ I'm sorry to be leavin' you j“
837
00:53:19,489 --> 00:53:22,533
j“ goodbye again j“
838
00:53:23,951 --> 00:53:25,036
j“ as if you didn't... j“
839
00:53:25,828 --> 00:53:27,330
Kate, Kate.
840
00:53:28,748 --> 00:53:31,583
- Oh, no, hey, ok.
- Can you watch her?
841
00:53:36,005 --> 00:53:40,259
J“there is a fire in the corner
slowly dying j“
842
00:53:45,890 --> 00:53:51,312
J“ I've seen a lot of sunshine
I've stepped out in the rain j“
843
00:53:51,813 --> 00:53:55,066
j“ then it's night or two out on my own j“
844
00:53:55,775 --> 00:53:58,277
j“ so lovely j“
845
00:53:59,862 --> 00:54:02,072
J“ sunshine j“
846
00:54:02,073 --> 00:54:06,994
j“ nearly always makes me high j“
847
00:54:14,585 --> 00:54:15,585
J'lfl... j'
848
00:54:15,753 --> 00:54:17,004
hi, mommy!
849
00:54:17,171 --> 00:54:20,465
J“ ...Song I could sing j“
850
00:54:39,026 --> 00:54:44,365
J“ sunshine all the while j“
851
00:55:07,346 --> 00:55:08,973
Shut up!
852
00:55:09,891 --> 00:55:12,643
How can you sing when I'm throwing up?
853
00:55:13,603 --> 00:55:15,646
How can you throw up when I'm singing?
854
00:55:17,023 --> 00:55:20,276
I can't help it. It's the pills.
You know that.
855
00:55:21,110 --> 00:55:24,321
Well, the christians always used to sing
before they were thrown to the lions.
856
00:55:24,322 --> 00:55:27,742
You know. It seemed like a good thing
to do, in the face of adversity.
857
00:55:28,284 --> 00:55:29,619
Adversity, oh, wow.
858
00:55:29,786 --> 00:55:33,663
Well, well, you're laughing.
That's better than before.
859
00:55:33,664 --> 00:55:37,292
I can't keep my food down. I can't sleep.
860
00:55:37,293 --> 00:55:39,211
My hair is coming out in the handfuls
861
00:55:39,212 --> 00:55:41,881
and you want me to laugh
at your sick jokes?
862
00:55:42,632 --> 00:55:44,300
I am a sick joke.
863
00:55:44,801 --> 00:55:47,260
- Then laugh at yourself.
- I can't!
864
00:55:47,261 --> 00:55:48,720
It's better than crying.
865
00:55:48,721 --> 00:55:50,431
I'm not crying!
866
00:55:58,231 --> 00:56:00,565
They can't even find a vein
that's any good any more
867
00:56:00,566 --> 00:56:02,860
to put the damn shots in!
868
00:56:03,402 --> 00:56:05,320
They're going to have to put it
in my temple next time.
869
00:56:05,321 --> 00:56:07,573
Oh, it's a riot. It's a laugh a minute.
870
00:56:08,282 --> 00:56:10,368
I suppose you've just left Jill.
871
00:56:12,495 --> 00:56:13,662
Jill, what are you doing?
872
00:56:13,663 --> 00:56:15,206
Hi, mommy.
873
00:56:15,748 --> 00:56:18,626
Bad girl! Bad girl!
874
00:56:20,753 --> 00:56:23,089
Bad girl! You're a bad girl!
875
00:56:23,256 --> 00:56:25,591
No, Sam.
876
00:56:31,472 --> 00:56:32,890
Ow. No!
877
00:56:33,808 --> 00:56:34,934
Daddy.
878
00:56:37,395 --> 00:56:38,729
Daddy.
879
00:56:42,191 --> 00:56:43,526
- Sam...
- I gotta go get Jill.
880
00:56:43,776 --> 00:56:45,735
- Talk to me.
- In a minute.
881
00:56:45,736 --> 00:56:47,096
- Sam...
- In a minute.
882
00:56:47,530 --> 00:56:51,075
Come on, come on, come on.
883
00:56:56,330 --> 00:56:57,832
- I'm sorry.
- Yeah.
884
00:56:59,083 --> 00:57:03,212
Well, why don't we all go to the park
or something?
885
00:57:04,297 --> 00:57:05,715
It's gonna rain.
886
00:57:06,340 --> 00:57:08,633
It's warm outside. The sun is shining.
887
00:57:10,303 --> 00:57:11,303
Jill?
888
00:57:11,512 --> 00:57:13,139
Come give mommy a kiss.
889
00:57:13,598 --> 00:57:14,598
No!
890
00:57:19,395 --> 00:57:21,272
Kate, will you come on, please?
891
00:57:23,941 --> 00:57:27,444
- I'm not going to that stupid park.
- Kate, please.
892
00:57:27,445 --> 00:57:29,654
I'm not going to compete with you
for my baby.
893
00:57:29,655 --> 00:57:31,157
Nobody's competing.
894
00:57:33,451 --> 00:57:36,287
She's mine, Sam. Remember?
895
00:57:36,954 --> 00:57:39,623
You're stealing her from me.
896
00:57:39,624 --> 00:57:41,833
She's the only thing in the world
that's altogether mine.
897
00:57:41,834 --> 00:57:43,710
I know what you're doing.
898
00:57:43,711 --> 00:57:44,711
I know what I'm doing, too.
899
00:57:44,712 --> 00:57:46,838
I'm taking care of another man's
kid 24 hours a day.
900
00:57:46,839 --> 00:57:48,089
That's what I'm doing.
901
00:57:48,090 --> 00:57:49,215
You're teaching her to hate me
902
00:57:49,216 --> 00:57:50,759
- ok, mom?
- So that when I die...
903
00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:53,136
- Yes.
- She won't be so much trouble.
904
00:57:53,137 --> 00:57:58,059
You can marryjust any old broad.
Any old broad'll be better than mommy!
905
00:58:26,003 --> 00:58:28,254
I've already made my decision.
906
00:58:28,255 --> 00:58:30,006
I'm not going to therapy any more.
907
00:58:30,007 --> 00:58:32,759
I hate it.
You're just wasting your breath.
908
00:58:32,760 --> 00:58:36,805
If you don't exercise that leg every day,
you're going to lose the use of it.
909
00:58:36,806 --> 00:58:40,142
The radiation weakens the muscles
along with the cancer.
910
00:58:40,434 --> 00:58:42,644
- Between treatments you've got to be...
- It hurts.
911
00:58:42,645 --> 00:58:44,187
Of course it hurts.
912
00:58:44,188 --> 00:58:46,189
If it hurts too much, take the pain pills.
913
00:58:46,190 --> 00:58:49,567
I don't want to take the pain pills
any more. They mess up my head.
914
00:58:49,568 --> 00:58:52,154
Do you want the use of your leg, Kate?
915
00:58:52,822 --> 00:58:54,573
I don't even want to live.
916
00:59:08,796 --> 00:59:12,882
Oh, you should find yourself a man
and have about 200 children.
917
00:59:12,883 --> 00:59:15,428
You'd be world's greatest mother.
918
00:59:16,345 --> 00:59:17,721
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
919
00:59:17,722 --> 00:59:20,807
I have 350 kids right here.
920
00:59:20,808 --> 00:59:23,393
- And you're my oldest.
- And most difficult.
921
00:59:23,394 --> 00:59:25,354
- I know.
- Right now. Right now.
922
00:59:29,358 --> 00:59:30,609
I'll give you Jill.
923
00:59:32,111 --> 00:59:33,278
You're kidding.
924
00:59:33,279 --> 00:59:34,572
No, I'm not.
925
00:59:35,573 --> 00:59:37,158
Take me off everything.
926
00:59:37,908 --> 00:59:42,496
The pain pills, the cancer pills,
the shots.
927
00:59:42,913 --> 00:59:46,916
The radiation, take me off everything.
928
00:59:46,917 --> 00:59:49,253
Or take my child.
929
00:59:53,090 --> 00:59:57,677
I could go do it, maybe, if it didn't mean
throwing up three times a day
930
00:59:57,678 --> 01:00:01,098
or flushing my hair down the toilet.
931
01:00:01,348 --> 01:00:05,352
But I can't go on doing what I'm doing
to Sam and Jill.
932
01:00:05,686 --> 01:00:08,314
It'll get better, really.
933
01:00:08,773 --> 01:00:11,775
Your system is going to get used to it.
934
01:00:11,776 --> 01:00:13,985
Sam understands.
935
01:00:13,986 --> 01:00:14,987
Jill doesn't.
936
01:00:15,821 --> 01:00:16,947
Jill can't.
937
01:00:17,740 --> 01:00:20,826
- All she knows is that her mother...
- Excuse me. Yes. I'm busy.
938
01:00:21,952 --> 01:00:23,788
Can you have them call me back. Yes.
939
01:00:24,497 --> 01:00:28,084
All she knows is that her mother
is screaming at her 25 hours a day.
940
01:00:28,876 --> 01:00:30,419
She never used to cry.
941
01:00:31,253 --> 01:00:33,464
Now she cries all the time.
942
01:00:36,383 --> 01:00:38,301
She cries in her sleep.
943
01:00:38,302 --> 01:00:40,012
She cries when she wakes up.
944
01:00:40,304 --> 01:00:42,722
She chews her fingernails.
She has nightmares.
945
01:00:42,723 --> 01:00:46,268
And when I come in to see her
in the middle of the night, she screams.
946
01:00:46,602 --> 01:00:49,479
All I ever really wanted to do
was have a child.
947
01:00:49,480 --> 01:00:52,358
A girl. And raise her the way
I should have been raised.
948
01:00:54,485 --> 01:00:56,903
With nothing but love and freedom.
949
01:00:56,904 --> 01:01:01,408
No shoes. No clothes. No puritan ethic.
950
01:01:01,617 --> 01:01:03,327
No anger.
951
01:01:04,078 --> 01:01:05,621
No rules.
952
01:01:06,831 --> 01:01:08,457
So that she could...
953
01:01:08,833 --> 01:01:11,167
Be open to the sun and the snow
954
01:01:11,168 --> 01:01:13,920
and the mountains and the rain
and just know how to love
955
01:01:13,921 --> 01:01:16,799
and it's awful hard
when you've never been loved.
956
01:01:19,218 --> 01:01:23,054
When all you've... when all
you've known is people scream at you
957
01:01:23,055 --> 01:01:24,473
and...
958
01:01:25,391 --> 01:01:27,101
Tell you how bad you are.
959
01:01:31,313 --> 01:01:32,731
Don't just sit there.
960
01:01:36,235 --> 01:01:37,755
Why don't you write some of that down?
961
01:01:37,945 --> 01:01:40,655
- Some of what?
- What you just said.
962
01:01:40,656 --> 01:01:41,907
And more.
963
01:01:42,908 --> 01:01:44,827
You could write Jill letters.
964
01:01:45,870 --> 01:01:51,124
You know, tell her things...
That you would while she was growing up.
965
01:01:51,125 --> 01:01:53,043
- Oh, sure.
- No, really.
966
01:01:53,669 --> 01:01:55,087
Really.
967
01:01:55,838 --> 01:01:58,424
You could anticipate her questions.
968
01:01:59,133 --> 01:02:01,009
You know? Um...
969
01:02:01,010 --> 01:02:04,012
What she was going to ask you about
when she was six.
970
01:02:04,013 --> 01:02:05,973
Things that you'd be telling her then.
971
01:02:06,557 --> 01:02:10,059
Nothing. You already now everything
when you're six.
972
01:02:11,478 --> 01:02:14,355
How about when you're ten or sixteen?
973
01:02:14,356 --> 01:02:15,565
I don't know.
974
01:02:15,566 --> 01:02:16,901
Well, sure you do.
975
01:02:17,610 --> 01:02:19,277
Let's see...
976
01:02:19,278 --> 01:02:21,154
Um, what about pimples?
977
01:02:21,155 --> 01:02:23,990
Ok. There you go. There's one.
978
01:02:23,991 --> 01:02:26,492
- You know about pimples, right?
- Yeah, I know about that.
979
01:02:26,493 --> 01:02:29,455
Ok and let's see,
what else could you tell her about?
980
01:02:29,705 --> 01:02:31,080
Boys?
981
01:02:31,081 --> 01:02:33,333
Yes, you could tell her about boys
and things you like,
982
01:02:33,334 --> 01:02:37,630
like trees and grass and mountains, rain.
983
01:02:38,130 --> 01:02:41,007
The seasons. Constancy.
984
01:02:41,008 --> 01:02:43,718
Oh, there's so many.
You can tell her about love.
985
01:02:43,719 --> 01:02:45,888
- Why?
- So she'd know you.
986
01:02:46,430 --> 01:02:49,308
And who you were
and how you feel about her.
987
01:02:52,311 --> 01:02:53,604
I can't type.
988
01:02:54,438 --> 01:02:56,731
- Well, then tape it.
- What am I supposed to buy
989
01:02:56,732 --> 01:02:58,816
a tape recorder with? Food stamps?
990
01:02:58,817 --> 01:03:01,445
No, I can do better for you than that.
991
01:03:07,326 --> 01:03:09,828
Well, you certainly know
how to change the subject.
992
01:03:11,163 --> 01:03:13,373
Well, you've got a life to get through.
993
01:03:13,374 --> 01:03:14,875
As well as a death.
994
01:03:15,751 --> 01:03:17,962
And I can't do it taking drugs.
995
01:03:20,965 --> 01:03:22,800
Let me get the tapes for that.
996
01:03:27,096 --> 01:03:28,389
Now, look, Kate.
997
01:03:29,306 --> 01:03:31,141
We do have another drug.
998
01:03:31,517 --> 01:03:33,268
It's still in experimental stages.
999
01:03:33,269 --> 01:03:35,645
I just want to stop taking
what I'm taking now.
1000
01:03:35,646 --> 01:03:36,897
I know.
1001
01:03:37,314 --> 01:03:40,733
It's been quite successful in preventing
secondary cancers in animals.
1002
01:03:40,734 --> 01:03:42,735
The experiments have been running
for two years.
1003
01:03:42,736 --> 01:03:43,945
- But they're not finished.
- Two years?
1004
01:03:43,946 --> 01:03:46,114
- Is it a depressant?
- No.
1005
01:03:46,115 --> 01:03:49,075
- Does it make you throw up?
- It doesn't make monkeys throw up.
1006
01:03:49,076 --> 01:03:51,244
- Fantastic.
- Now wait just a minute.
1007
01:03:51,245 --> 01:03:53,913
Quite successful means seventy percent.
1008
01:03:53,914 --> 01:03:56,332
Thirty percent of the animals
have already died.
1009
01:03:56,333 --> 01:03:58,960
- It's no miracle, Kate.
- 70% is more than half a chance.
1010
01:03:58,961 --> 01:04:01,587
It's simply a substitute
for what you're on now.
1011
01:04:01,588 --> 01:04:04,674
One that might not give you
as much trouble, that's all.
1012
01:04:04,675 --> 01:04:07,802
It's... it's experimental.
It could give you more trouble.
1013
01:04:07,803 --> 01:04:09,721
It's a long long shot.
There are no guarantees.
1014
01:04:09,722 --> 01:04:11,556
I don't want...
I don't want any guarantees.
1015
01:04:11,557 --> 01:04:14,559
Whose to say you won't get run over
by a truck on the way to kindergarten.
1016
01:04:14,560 --> 01:04:17,145
Or have a man Sam
or have a kid like Jill.
1017
01:04:17,146 --> 01:04:18,521
I don't want any guarantees.
1018
01:04:18,522 --> 01:04:21,482
When I said two years,
that doesn't mean... Kate, listen to me.
1019
01:04:21,483 --> 01:04:24,527
- It doesn't mean that...
- I don't want any guarantees!
1020
01:04:24,528 --> 01:04:27,697
Two years! I was born lucky.
1021
01:04:27,698 --> 01:04:29,991
I can write war and peace in two years.
1022
01:04:29,992 --> 01:04:34,203
Jill'll be four in two years!
I can remember when I was four.
1023
01:04:34,204 --> 01:04:36,664
I went to the zoo!
1024
01:04:36,665 --> 01:04:39,375
Kate, please listen to me.
Now, I have more to say. Now, wait.
1025
01:04:39,376 --> 01:04:40,836
Kate, you have to let me finish.
1026
01:04:41,587 --> 01:04:43,047
Sam?
1027
01:04:59,313 --> 01:05:01,357
Sam, are you here?
1028
01:05:08,614 --> 01:05:09,614
Uh...
1029
01:05:09,615 --> 01:05:12,034
Hello, tape recorder, can you hear me?
1030
01:05:13,369 --> 01:05:14,411
Come on.
1031
01:05:16,038 --> 01:05:19,708
Hello, doctor Gillman. Hello, Jill.
1032
01:05:20,667 --> 01:05:22,336
Hello, world!
1033
01:05:25,964 --> 01:05:27,424
I love you.
1034
01:05:34,014 --> 01:05:37,810
Hello,
doctor Gillman. Hello, Jill.
1035
01:05:38,352 --> 01:05:40,687
Hello, world!
1036
01:05:42,272 --> 01:05:43,399
Oh...
1037
01:05:43,816 --> 01:05:45,359
I love you.
1038
01:05:53,325 --> 01:05:54,785
Sam!
1039
01:05:55,452 --> 01:05:57,579
Somebody!
1040
01:06:07,798 --> 01:06:10,217
I have so many things to write about.
1041
01:06:12,803 --> 01:06:17,099
And so many things to say to someone
to someone who'll listen,
1042
01:06:19,435 --> 01:06:21,603
I don't know where to begin.
1043
01:06:22,729 --> 01:06:27,316
J“ a c, back to g, g again j“
1044
01:06:27,317 --> 01:06:30,070
j“ with an f sharp bass
to e minor j“
1045
01:06:30,362 --> 01:06:32,488
j“ c again j“
1046
01:06:32,489 --> 01:06:34,240
- Sam!
- Huh?
1047
01:06:34,241 --> 01:06:35,993
Where's my tape recorder?
1048
01:06:36,785 --> 01:06:39,538
It's right here, on the...
On the rocking chair.
1049
01:06:40,205 --> 01:06:44,334
It's absolutely freaky having a thing
for a machine but I really love it.
1050
01:06:44,585 --> 01:06:46,919
Anything that makes you as happy
as you've been the last couple of weeks,
1051
01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:48,713
can't be all that bad, Kate.
1052
01:06:48,714 --> 01:06:50,298
Even if it is a machine.
1053
01:06:50,299 --> 01:06:52,341
Oh, it's a trip. Definitely a trip.
1054
01:06:52,342 --> 01:06:54,553
Yeah, an ego trip is what it is.
1055
01:06:55,095 --> 01:06:56,847
Ego-shmeego, man.
1056
01:06:57,431 --> 01:07:00,267
Anything that satisfies you
is an ego trip.
1057
01:07:00,601 --> 01:07:01,809
Even dying.
1058
01:07:01,810 --> 01:07:04,187
- Oh, that's funny.
- Oh, Weaver, sit on it.
1059
01:07:04,188 --> 01:07:05,730
Thanks a lot, cuz.
1060
01:07:05,731 --> 01:07:09,484
- Hey, Sam? Sam? Can we please rehearse?
- Hey, who invited him?
1061
01:07:09,485 --> 01:07:11,986
- Let them clean up.
- Sam, go on, now. I'll do the dishes.
1062
01:07:11,987 --> 01:07:14,323
Go on, now.
1063
01:07:29,087 --> 01:07:30,087
No!
1064
01:07:32,966 --> 01:07:35,177
J“ ...Sorrow in your eyes j“
1065
01:07:35,552 --> 01:07:39,096
j“ the stars are changing quietly j“
1066
01:07:39,097 --> 01:07:41,682
j“ the night is nearly gone j“
1067
01:07:41,683 --> 01:07:42,683
Kate.
1068
01:07:43,936 --> 01:07:46,063
We got company, Sam.
Let's talk about it later.
1069
01:07:49,733 --> 01:07:51,776
You're not taking your pills.
1070
01:07:51,777 --> 01:07:54,362
They make me just as sick
as the other ones.
1071
01:07:54,363 --> 01:07:56,864
So, how many did you take? You didn't give
your body a chance to get used to 'em.
1072
01:07:56,865 --> 01:07:58,616
- What did you take? Two or three?
- Ten!
1073
01:07:58,617 --> 01:08:00,409
- Ten?
- Ten days.
1074
01:08:01,329 --> 01:08:03,162
- That ought to be enough.
- She didn't give the other pills
1075
01:08:03,163 --> 01:08:04,664
- a chance to work.
- They made me dizzy
1076
01:08:04,665 --> 01:08:06,582
on top of everything else, Sam!
1077
01:08:06,583 --> 01:08:09,043
Dizzy? What does dizzy got to do with it?
1078
01:08:09,044 --> 01:08:11,672
I can't take care of Jill. I can't think.
I fall down.
1079
01:08:13,048 --> 01:08:15,174
I can't work on the book.
1080
01:08:15,175 --> 01:08:18,469
That book! That book's more important
to you than living?
1081
01:08:26,895 --> 01:08:27,895
Sam.
1082
01:08:28,146 --> 01:08:30,147
Now, look,
if it's right for Kate, it's right.
1083
01:08:30,148 --> 01:08:33,109
You know, it's really not up to you or me
or even her doctor
1084
01:08:33,110 --> 01:08:35,236
to tell her how to live her life.
1085
01:08:35,237 --> 01:08:37,572
If it's right for Kate, it's right.
1086
01:08:37,573 --> 01:08:38,864
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1087
01:08:38,865 --> 01:08:40,826
Yeah, what about me and Jill?
1088
01:08:44,496 --> 01:08:47,957
No. She's not taking the pills,
she's not taking anything.
1089
01:08:47,958 --> 01:08:51,420
She doesn't even want to come in
for the radiation treatments any more.
1090
01:08:53,755 --> 01:08:56,674
Yeah, no, yeah, man,
I know the consequences!
1091
01:08:56,675 --> 01:08:57,801
I'm the one...
1092
01:09:01,471 --> 01:09:02,471
Yes.
1093
01:09:04,600 --> 01:09:06,852
Yes. She knows. We've talked.
1094
01:09:07,144 --> 01:09:10,187
We've talked and talked
until I'm talked out.
1095
01:09:10,188 --> 01:09:12,940
So, you see, I'm turning it
all over to you, now.
1096
01:09:12,941 --> 01:09:14,276
And...
1097
01:09:14,776 --> 01:09:15,776
Yeah.
1098
01:09:17,946 --> 01:09:22,034
You've gotta have time, you're the one
who gave her the damn machine...
1099
01:09:29,333 --> 01:09:31,042
Listen, they've got
to give you five minutes
1100
01:09:31,043 --> 01:09:33,085
sometime during the day for lunch, right?
1101
01:09:33,086 --> 01:09:36,131
So, just come on over.
We'll split a can of spam or something.
1102
01:09:36,673 --> 01:09:38,674
When I started the book,
1103
01:09:38,675 --> 01:09:42,219
I realized that the length of your life
1104
01:09:42,220 --> 01:09:44,555
doesn't make the slightest bit
of difference.
1105
01:09:44,556 --> 01:09:47,017
It's the quality, not the quantity.
1106
01:09:47,643 --> 01:09:49,602
Well, maybe with your drugs
1107
01:09:49,603 --> 01:09:52,397
I'll be able to live until I'm 360.
1108
01:09:53,857 --> 01:09:57,985
And maybe without them, ok,
I'll die... sooner.
1109
01:09:57,986 --> 01:10:00,071
Like, tomorrow maybe.
1110
01:10:00,072 --> 01:10:03,742
A couple of months maybe.
Enough time to leave a little book...
1111
01:10:04,534 --> 01:10:08,162
A part of myself for Jill.
Even for Mr. Grouch face.
1112
01:10:08,163 --> 01:10:10,832
- Here's the little treat I promised you.
- Thank you, Sam.
1113
01:10:11,208 --> 01:10:14,210
- The decision is up to you, Kate.
- The decision is not up to her.
1114
01:10:14,211 --> 01:10:15,503
She's into playing Camille.
1115
01:10:15,504 --> 01:10:16,463
- I'm not.
- Can't you see that?
1116
01:10:16,464 --> 01:10:18,172
I just know the kind of life I wanna live.
1117
01:10:18,173 --> 01:10:20,466
Yeah, without any regard for anybody else.
1118
01:10:20,467 --> 01:10:22,385
What do you mean, "without any regard
for anybody else"?
1119
01:10:22,386 --> 01:10:24,970
Kate, there has to be an understanding
that if you give up the drugs
1120
01:10:24,971 --> 01:10:26,722
and if you give up the radiation treatment
1121
01:10:26,723 --> 01:10:29,184
you will have absolutely no chance
of stopping cancer.
1122
01:10:29,685 --> 01:10:31,352
And it grows very fast.
1123
01:10:31,353 --> 01:10:33,354
How fast is very fast?
1124
01:10:33,355 --> 01:10:36,774
How fast is fast? That's not
the point. How can you ask that?
1125
01:10:36,775 --> 01:10:38,651
Didn't you hear her what she said?
1126
01:10:38,652 --> 01:10:40,820
With medication,
you have a chance to live.
1127
01:10:40,821 --> 01:10:46,242
A chance. A ten to twenty percent chance
to live for five years as a vegetable.
1128
01:10:46,243 --> 01:10:48,787
I want you to live!
Jill wants you to live!
1129
01:10:49,287 --> 01:10:51,122
I can't live on medication, Sam.
1130
01:10:51,123 --> 01:10:52,707
That's what I'm trying to say.
1131
01:10:52,708 --> 01:10:55,501
So, they're going to find a cure
for cancer, right?
1132
01:10:55,502 --> 01:10:59,964
I mean, thirty years ago you died
of diphtheria, pneumonia and polio.
1133
01:10:59,965 --> 01:11:00,965
Today it's cancer.
1134
01:11:01,049 --> 01:11:03,468
They're going to find a cure for cancer
any day now.
1135
01:11:04,428 --> 01:11:07,097
In zero to five years?
1136
01:11:07,681 --> 01:11:08,682
It's possible.
1137
01:11:09,349 --> 01:11:11,268
But the odds?
1138
01:11:13,019 --> 01:11:15,187
I can't take that gamble.
1139
01:11:15,188 --> 01:11:18,149
- You have to take that gamble.
- And die after five years
1140
01:11:18,150 --> 01:11:21,527
after I've made everybody miserable
including myself.
1141
01:11:21,528 --> 01:11:23,405
What for, Sam?
1142
01:11:26,366 --> 01:11:28,743
How fast will it spread
if I don't take the medication?
1143
01:11:28,744 --> 01:11:31,079
It's impossible for me to predict that.
1144
01:11:31,788 --> 01:11:33,665
Well, I won't die tomorrow, will I?
1145
01:11:34,541 --> 01:11:37,960
I mean, I'll have some time
before it gets to my lungs.
1146
01:11:37,961 --> 01:11:40,881
And then some time again
before it kills me.
1147
01:11:41,548 --> 01:11:43,216
And up until then...
1148
01:11:44,968 --> 01:11:47,928
I'm not going to feel much worse
than I feel now, am I?
1149
01:11:47,929 --> 01:11:50,347
You'll feel much worse at the end.
1150
01:11:50,348 --> 01:11:52,600
But until then...
1151
01:11:52,601 --> 01:11:54,853
Weaker, perhaps, but not perceptibly.
1152
01:11:55,353 --> 01:11:56,646
See?
1153
01:11:56,938 --> 01:11:58,690
That's enough time.
1154
01:11:59,232 --> 01:12:00,442
Enough time?
1155
01:12:00,942 --> 01:12:04,487
Enough time? Enough time for what?
To be a wife? To be a mother?
1156
01:12:04,488 --> 01:12:08,657
To... to see the world? To experience
everything there is to experience?
1157
01:12:08,658 --> 01:12:09,784
- "Enough time"?
- Sam.
1158
01:12:09,785 --> 01:12:12,119
Sixty years isn't enough time for me!
1159
01:12:12,120 --> 01:12:13,955
Yes, but you don't have a tape recorder.
1160
01:12:15,874 --> 01:12:18,167
I don't... I don't believe any of this!
1161
01:12:18,168 --> 01:12:19,168
Sam.
1162
01:12:19,836 --> 01:12:23,048
It's not quite as out and dried
as you make it out to be.
1163
01:12:24,883 --> 01:12:27,885
Without medication,
she will certainly die.
1164
01:12:27,886 --> 01:12:30,180
And within a short period of time.
1165
01:12:30,555 --> 01:12:34,059
With medication
she will most likely, also die.
1166
01:12:34,518 --> 01:12:36,310
But not quite as soon.
1167
01:12:36,311 --> 01:12:38,104
Osteogenic sarcoma is very rare,
1168
01:12:38,772 --> 01:12:41,316
and we don't have much of a chance
to work with it.
1169
01:12:41,691 --> 01:12:42,817
And very deadly.
1170
01:12:42,818 --> 01:12:45,946
So whenever we do have a case,
we just don't have much time.
1171
01:12:46,279 --> 01:12:48,447
- Yeah, well...
- Sam, listen to me.
1172
01:12:48,448 --> 01:12:51,116
And some people react
so adversely to medication,
1173
01:12:51,117 --> 01:12:54,829
that the difference between dying soon
and dying sooner,
1174
01:12:54,830 --> 01:12:56,163
has no meaning to them.
1175
01:12:56,164 --> 01:12:59,375
- Well, in my opinion... no, you wait...
- Just a minute. Just a minute.
1176
01:12:59,376 --> 01:13:01,877
Perhaps it's better to die with purpose
1177
01:13:01,878 --> 01:13:04,422
and dignity, even if it's sooner.
1178
01:13:08,260 --> 01:13:09,803
Well...
1179
01:13:10,262 --> 01:13:14,349
In my opinion, you are committing suicide.
1180
01:13:15,600 --> 01:13:17,227
And you are a murderer.
1181
01:13:23,483 --> 01:13:25,568
He loves dramatic exits.
1182
01:13:25,569 --> 01:13:27,404
Does he do it often? Will he be back?
1183
01:13:28,238 --> 01:13:29,238
Does it matter?
1184
01:13:36,663 --> 01:13:39,749
Feeling sorry for myself.
1185
01:13:40,834 --> 01:13:42,460
I like to, sometimes.
1186
01:13:42,669 --> 01:13:45,171
Like right now, because I'm alone.
1187
01:13:45,338 --> 01:13:47,215
Because I'm dying.
1188
01:13:47,507 --> 01:13:49,426
I like being a martyr.
1189
01:13:49,634 --> 01:13:52,220
At least it gives me something to be.
1190
01:13:54,723 --> 01:13:56,516
I love you, mommy.
1191
01:13:59,978 --> 01:14:03,899
J“ there's a fire in
the corner slowly dying j“
1192
01:14:04,316 --> 01:14:08,402
j“ sometimes
I just don't feel like goin' on j“
1193
01:14:08,403 --> 01:14:12,615
j“ and yet I know it's more than worth
the waiting j“
1194
01:14:12,616 --> 01:14:15,826
j“ for another chance
to see the summer sun j“
1195
01:14:15,827 --> 01:14:17,829
j“ come on shine on me j“
1196
01:14:18,747 --> 01:14:19,915
yee-haw!
1197
01:14:24,419 --> 01:14:28,590
J“ there's a fire
in the corner slowly dying j“
1198
01:14:28,965 --> 01:14:33,385
j“ sometimes I just don't feel
like goin' on j“
1199
01:14:33,386 --> 01:14:37,056
j“ and yet I know it's more than worth
the waiting j“
1200
01:14:37,057 --> 01:14:40,726
j“ for another chance
to see the summer sun j“
1201
01:14:40,727 --> 01:14:46,607
j“ come on shine on me j“
1202
01:14:46,608 --> 01:14:48,943
Ok, we have to decide.
1203
01:14:48,944 --> 01:14:51,028
- If we're gonna "yee-haw"...
- The "bop-bop-do"...
1204
01:14:52,948 --> 01:14:55,492
Doesn't anybody answer the phone
in this place?
1205
01:14:58,453 --> 01:14:59,453
Yeah?
1206
01:15:04,709 --> 01:15:05,919
Uh...
1207
01:15:06,670 --> 01:15:08,546
You going to take the pills or not?
1208
01:15:10,215 --> 01:15:13,385
That's not... that's not the question.
Just answer the question.
1209
01:15:18,556 --> 01:15:22,727
No, if you take the pills, I come back.
It's as simple as that. It's easy.
1210
01:15:26,147 --> 01:15:28,899
Oh, come no now, I don't want to hear
any more of this garbage, Kate.
1211
01:15:28,900 --> 01:15:30,694
Just, will you or won't you, right?
1212
01:15:31,403 --> 01:15:33,154
Right. Ok. Bye.
1213
01:15:34,489 --> 01:15:35,448
Who was that?
1214
01:15:35,449 --> 01:15:36,825
Wrong number.
1215
01:15:41,329 --> 01:15:42,913
I'll put the rest of these up
for you, doctor.
1216
01:15:42,914 --> 01:15:44,082
Thank you, Mary.
1217
01:15:48,086 --> 01:15:49,086
How's Jill?
1218
01:15:49,295 --> 01:15:50,295
Thriving.
1219
01:15:50,964 --> 01:15:51,964
Good.
1220
01:15:54,467 --> 01:15:56,678
Oh, I've got some thing for you.
1221
01:15:57,220 --> 01:15:58,846
I thought you weren't going
to give me these these
1222
01:15:58,847 --> 01:16:01,766
- unless I went to therapy.
- No, I wouldn't do that to you.
1223
01:16:09,733 --> 01:16:10,859
It looks worse.
1224
01:16:12,235 --> 01:16:13,987
Yes, doctor, it does.
1225
01:16:15,697 --> 01:16:17,990
But the chest x—ray was negative.
1226
01:16:17,991 --> 01:16:19,950
- It hasn't spread to my lungs.
- That's correct.
1227
01:16:19,951 --> 01:16:24,247
So the fact that the knee's worse
isn't really significant, is it?
1228
01:16:25,123 --> 01:16:27,167
Who are we kidding, me or you?
1229
01:16:28,376 --> 01:16:30,628
It was worth a try.
1230
01:16:32,380 --> 01:16:35,299
Where is Sam keeping himself these days
or don't you know?
1231
01:16:35,300 --> 01:16:36,967
Sure I know.
1232
01:16:36,968 --> 01:16:38,927
He's been staying
in a place called o'brien's
1233
01:16:38,928 --> 01:16:42,056
- on western and 66th.
- Mmm.
1234
01:16:42,057 --> 01:16:45,185
- But don't waste your time.
- Let me take a look at that knee.
1235
01:16:47,479 --> 01:16:50,482
It's so ugly.
I should have had it cut off.
1236
01:16:51,483 --> 01:16:52,983
You miss Sam much?
1237
01:16:52,984 --> 01:16:54,444
Jill does.
1238
01:16:55,528 --> 01:16:56,780
What about you?
1239
01:16:59,824 --> 01:17:01,493
Yeah.
1240
01:17:02,702 --> 01:17:04,912
What days
does Sam work at o'brien's?
1241
01:17:04,913 --> 01:17:06,747
Work? He doesn't work there.
1242
01:17:06,748 --> 01:17:08,791
He just goes to practice there
during the day.
1243
01:17:08,792 --> 01:17:11,919
- But like I said, don't waste your time.
- Of course not.
1244
01:17:11,920 --> 01:17:14,421
J“ to go a little while j“
1245
01:17:14,422 --> 01:17:18,718
j“ and it's goodbye again j“
1246
01:17:19,344 --> 01:17:22,763
j“ I'm sorry to be leavin' you j“
1247
01:17:22,764 --> 01:17:26,142
j“ but goodbye again j“
1248
01:17:27,519 --> 01:17:29,896
j“ as if you didn't know j“
1249
01:17:30,188 --> 01:17:33,733
j“ it's goodbye again j“
1250
01:17:34,692 --> 01:17:38,113
j“and I wish that you could tell me j“
1251
01:17:38,780 --> 01:17:41,490
j“ why do we always fight j“
1252
01:17:41,491 --> 01:17:45,620
j“ when I have to go j“
1253
01:17:52,794 --> 01:17:54,670
- It's very good.
- Hi, doc.
1254
01:17:54,671 --> 01:17:57,965
Well, well, well.
If isn't Marcus welby in drag.
1255
01:18:00,510 --> 01:18:02,262
Sam? Could I talk to you a minute?
1256
01:18:02,762 --> 01:18:03,762
No.
1257
01:18:04,222 --> 01:18:05,848
- You're not gonna talk to her?
- No, we're rehearsing.
1258
01:18:05,849 --> 01:18:07,724
That's what's happening right now.
1259
01:18:07,725 --> 01:18:09,727
- Right? Ok.
- Not gonna talk to her?
1260
01:18:10,019 --> 01:18:11,353
Are you afraid?
1261
01:18:11,354 --> 01:18:14,523
There'sjust nothing I really want
to talk to you about. That's all.
1262
01:18:14,524 --> 01:18:15,524
I see.
1263
01:18:17,443 --> 01:18:19,069
Well, then you're going to have
to bear with me.
1264
01:18:19,070 --> 01:18:21,906
'Cause there's a few things
I want to talk to you about.
1265
01:18:22,323 --> 01:18:27,161
Your wife. Your responsibilities.
Your humanity. Or your lack of it.
1266
01:18:27,162 --> 01:18:29,121
You're letting her kill herself
1267
01:18:29,122 --> 01:18:32,124
and you're talking to me
about my lack of humanity?
1268
01:18:32,125 --> 01:18:34,960
Why did you marry her?
You knew she had cancer.
1269
01:18:34,961 --> 01:18:37,629
- Why did you marry her?
- He's a little stupid.
1270
01:18:37,630 --> 01:18:38,673
This is your business?
1271
01:18:39,007 --> 01:18:41,384
- I loved her.
- Well, don't you still love her?
1272
01:18:42,802 --> 01:18:45,888
I, well... I don't know.
I really don't know.
1273
01:18:46,807 --> 01:18:49,183
No, no, he doesn't.
And if we're all satisfied,
1274
01:18:49,184 --> 01:18:51,310
- we'd like to rehearse.
- Why don't you stay out of this?
1275
01:18:51,311 --> 01:18:53,729
- Hey, let's go get some eats, huh?
- I'm not hungry.
1276
01:18:53,730 --> 01:18:54,730
I'm hungry.
1277
01:18:55,356 --> 01:18:57,357
No, wait a minute. We're still rehearsing.
Everything on stage...
1278
01:18:57,358 --> 01:18:59,359
- Sam!
- Look, all I know is,
1279
01:18:59,360 --> 01:19:01,362
is that I can't watch her not fight.
1280
01:19:02,488 --> 01:19:03,697
I realize it's terminal.
1281
01:19:03,698 --> 01:19:06,743
I realize that it wouldn't do
any good at all to fight.
1282
01:19:07,327 --> 01:19:08,869
- Would you... do you want some of this?
- No.
1283
01:19:08,870 --> 01:19:12,624
But I want her to. I mean, I would.
If it was me.
1284
01:19:13,124 --> 01:19:15,667
Yeah, well, it's not you. It's her.
1285
01:19:15,668 --> 01:19:17,461
She's dying her way.
1286
01:19:17,462 --> 01:19:19,588
- And she has a right.
- But she's accepted it.
1287
01:19:19,589 --> 01:19:22,132
She's given up.
And she wants my approval for that.
1288
01:19:22,133 --> 01:19:25,053
And I can't give it to her.
I just can't hack that.
1289
01:19:32,101 --> 01:19:34,436
Wait and see how Ivy grows, Jill.
1290
01:19:34,437 --> 01:19:36,855
It grows really fast.
1291
01:19:36,856 --> 01:19:38,690
Let's put it over by the window, ok?
1292
01:19:38,691 --> 01:19:40,902
It's gonna get lots... lots of sunshine.
1293
01:19:43,363 --> 01:19:46,532
It'll be perfect.
We can tie it with some string.
1294
01:19:48,201 --> 01:19:50,786
Right. We can tie it with some string,
it'll frame the window
1295
01:19:50,787 --> 01:19:52,247
and it'll look really pretty.
1296
01:19:54,290 --> 01:19:55,250
Really leafy.
1297
01:19:55,251 --> 01:19:57,501
I'm wet, mommy.
1298
01:19:57,502 --> 01:19:58,670
Oh, my god, wet pants.
1299
01:19:59,754 --> 01:20:01,381
Get me some pants, ok?
1300
01:20:03,508 --> 01:20:05,718
I tried to write a poem for Jill today,
1301
01:20:06,469 --> 01:20:08,805
but all I could think of was sunshine.
1302
01:20:09,138 --> 01:20:11,224
Beautiful sunshine.
1303
01:20:12,016 --> 01:20:16,020
If I had a piano,
I could play a lullaby for Jill.
1304
01:20:17,563 --> 01:20:18,689
A blues lullaby.
1305
01:20:18,690 --> 01:20:20,649
Hi, mom. It's Kate...
1306
01:20:20,650 --> 01:20:21,651
How are you?
1307
01:20:21,943 --> 01:20:25,571
People have been nice
but there isn't anybody I can cry with.
1308
01:20:26,864 --> 01:20:29,575
Nobody to touch me. Nobody to say it's ok.
1309
01:20:30,034 --> 01:20:31,034
Is dad there?
1310
01:20:31,119 --> 01:20:33,871
Nobody to comfort me
and listen to my self-pity.
1311
01:20:34,622 --> 01:20:37,292
I'm so tied up inside it hurts.
1312
01:20:40,295 --> 01:20:42,546
I wish
my sister could come down.
1313
01:20:42,547 --> 01:20:45,008
You should see her.
She's growing like a weed.
1314
01:20:46,634 --> 01:20:48,593
It's just that if I was a grandmother,
1315
01:20:48,594 --> 01:20:51,139
I'd take a little more interest
in my grandchild.
1316
01:20:52,640 --> 01:20:55,059
No, I'm not criticizing, mom.
1317
01:20:57,103 --> 01:20:58,438
Sam's fine.
1318
01:20:59,147 --> 01:21:00,565
No, he's not here right now.
1319
01:21:02,066 --> 01:21:03,484
Why?
1320
01:21:04,360 --> 01:21:06,738
He's rehearsing, I suppose,
I really don't know.
1321
01:21:07,613 --> 01:21:10,616
That's right, mom.
I don't know exactly where he is.
1322
01:21:11,034 --> 01:21:13,119
Ok? Satisfied?
1323
01:21:16,831 --> 01:21:18,832
Just a couple of weeks.
1324
01:21:20,752 --> 01:21:23,587
He just... he just has a hard time, mom.
1325
01:21:23,588 --> 01:21:26,049
With my knee and all,
not being able to get a job.
1326
01:21:29,260 --> 01:21:32,722
Mom, if you keep going on like this,
I'm just going to hang up.
1327
01:21:34,307 --> 01:21:35,849
No, I don't need anything.
1328
01:21:35,850 --> 01:21:39,853
Yes, I do. I need pat. Will you please
send her down here for a weekend?
1329
01:21:39,854 --> 01:21:41,938
What kind of trouble
is she gonna get into,
1330
01:21:41,939 --> 01:21:44,525
helping me take care of Jill
and clean up the house?
1331
01:21:46,986 --> 01:21:49,029
Never mind, mom.
1332
01:21:49,030 --> 01:21:52,866
It's been really great talking to you,
I'd forgotten what a sweetheart you are.
1333
01:21:52,867 --> 01:21:55,036
Yeah. Now, I won't miss you any more.
1334
01:21:56,704 --> 01:21:57,997
Hey, tootie.
1335
01:22:08,257 --> 01:22:09,342
Who is it?
1336
01:22:10,468 --> 01:22:11,468
Bob Dylan.
1337
01:22:35,410 --> 01:22:36,410
Hi.
1338
01:22:37,286 --> 01:22:38,995
Making love to your tape recorder?
1339
01:22:38,996 --> 01:22:40,164
It's a nice alternative.
1340
01:22:41,082 --> 01:22:42,625
It doesn't get angry.
1341
01:22:43,292 --> 01:22:45,503
And it doesn't leave
when things get sticky.
1342
01:22:46,963 --> 01:22:49,506
- It's not bullheaded. It's not stupid.
- Wow.
1343
01:22:49,507 --> 01:22:53,094
I certainly hope
that you'll both be very happy together.
1344
01:22:53,428 --> 01:22:56,888
This guy was hanging around o'brien's.
1345
01:22:56,889 --> 01:22:59,434
When the pound came,
I told them he was yours.
1346
01:23:05,898 --> 01:23:08,443
- Came to get all yourjunk, uh?
- Yep.
1347
01:23:12,488 --> 01:23:14,406
It's a weird time to move, isn't it?
1348
01:23:14,407 --> 01:23:15,992
Jill's asleep.
1349
01:23:16,909 --> 01:23:18,034
So it's easier.
1350
01:23:18,035 --> 01:23:19,454
A lot easier.
1351
01:23:21,080 --> 01:23:22,957
I'll shut up, too, if you want me to.
1352
01:23:23,583 --> 01:23:26,001
Doesn't make much difference
one way or the other.
1353
01:23:26,002 --> 01:23:28,504
No. I'm immune to you.
1354
01:23:29,797 --> 01:23:31,048
What's the cat's name?
1355
01:23:31,674 --> 01:23:32,674
Gypsy.
1356
01:23:33,217 --> 01:23:35,302
Is that symbolic or something?
1357
01:23:35,303 --> 01:23:37,054
No, it's descriptive.
1358
01:23:38,848 --> 01:23:40,808
He likes me. He'll stay with me.
1359
01:23:41,392 --> 01:23:43,102
He's dumb. He might.
1360
01:23:43,811 --> 01:23:46,438
I miss you and all your snitty remarks.
1361
01:23:46,439 --> 01:23:48,191
Yes, and I miss you.
1362
01:23:48,900 --> 01:23:50,026
And your death wish.
1363
01:23:50,401 --> 01:23:52,652
- It's gone.
- Sure. Sure.
1364
01:23:52,653 --> 01:23:54,655
No, really. It really is. It's gone.
1365
01:23:58,034 --> 01:23:59,534
You gonna take the drugs?
1366
01:23:59,535 --> 01:24:00,953
Let's go to the mountains.
1367
01:24:02,413 --> 01:24:03,789
You and me and Jill.
1368
01:24:04,415 --> 01:24:06,209
It's really nice up there now.
1369
01:24:08,294 --> 01:24:10,171
I miss talking to you.
1370
01:24:12,798 --> 01:24:14,550
I miss making love to you, too.
1371
01:24:16,552 --> 01:24:18,637
But what about the cancer, Kate?
1372
01:24:18,638 --> 01:24:21,389
Come on. What're we gonna do
about the cancer?
1373
01:24:21,390 --> 01:24:22,683
Live with it.
1374
01:24:24,352 --> 01:24:25,644
No.
1375
01:24:25,645 --> 01:24:29,356
You're asking me to watch you die, baby.
I can't do that.
1376
01:24:29,357 --> 01:24:30,566
I need you.
1377
01:24:31,651 --> 01:24:32,902
I'm begging you.
1378
01:24:37,031 --> 01:24:38,740
I'm not asking you to die with me,
1379
01:24:38,741 --> 01:24:40,492
I'm not asking you
to stay to the very end.
1380
01:24:40,493 --> 01:24:42,286
I'm just asking you to live with me.
1381
01:24:46,832 --> 01:24:49,543
Everybody knows that a cat won't stay
in a house
1382
01:24:49,544 --> 01:24:51,337
where someone's dying.
1383
01:24:53,714 --> 01:24:55,550
Stay as long as gypsy stays.
1384
01:24:57,635 --> 01:24:58,635
Ok?
1385
01:25:07,645 --> 01:25:09,313
Finally.
1386
01:25:10,189 --> 01:25:11,941
Peace within myself
1387
01:25:13,734 --> 01:25:16,529
summer is over and fall is my time.
1388
01:25:16,821 --> 01:25:19,448
My poetry. I love it.
1389
01:25:20,616 --> 01:25:23,076
Virgo in September and changing leaves,
1390
01:25:23,077 --> 01:25:26,080
falling and cluttering
and drifting to the ground.
1391
01:25:26,872 --> 01:25:29,249
The smell of the sun and the dying grass,
1392
01:25:29,250 --> 01:25:31,502
the light filtering through the branches.
1393
01:25:33,421 --> 01:25:35,673
In Autumn,
the sun is in the peace position.
1394
01:25:36,882 --> 01:25:40,343
So, it's time for warm sweaters
and football and touching and loving.
1395
01:25:40,344 --> 01:25:43,097
Oh, I love it so much!
1396
01:25:53,190 --> 01:25:54,649
Where the hell have you been?
1397
01:25:54,650 --> 01:25:56,776
Can you help me get the stuff
out of the car, please?
1398
01:25:56,777 --> 01:25:59,237
- Nora!
- We had an audition. Remember?
1399
01:25:59,238 --> 01:26:02,282
I mean, we almost had a job.
Except you weren't here.
1400
01:26:02,283 --> 01:26:03,908
I had to go to the mountains.
1401
01:26:03,909 --> 01:26:05,577
What do you mean
you had to go to the mountains?
1402
01:26:05,578 --> 01:26:06,953
Without telling anybody?
1403
01:26:06,954 --> 01:26:09,039
Will you just cool it, Weaver?
We just got back.
1404
01:26:09,040 --> 01:26:11,500
You knew we had an audition,
what are you trying to do?
1405
01:26:12,627 --> 01:26:16,589
You have just become Mr. Irresponsibility
and it really is getting me down.
1406
01:26:17,798 --> 01:26:20,800
- How's the big c coming along, Kate?
- Would you cool it, I said!
1407
01:26:20,801 --> 01:26:22,677
- Be nice!
- Better till you got here!
1408
01:26:22,678 --> 01:26:25,847
Right, you better rush back
to the mountains and recuperate
1409
01:26:25,848 --> 01:26:27,265
from nasty old Weaver.
1410
01:26:27,266 --> 01:26:29,142
You are nasty.
1411
01:26:29,143 --> 01:26:30,852
- Nora, will you give me the...
- I mean, your old man...
1412
01:26:30,853 --> 01:26:31,936
- On the table.
- Doesn't need to work.
1413
01:26:31,937 --> 01:26:33,189
Oh, yeah. Sure.
1414
01:26:34,565 --> 01:26:36,483
And, you know, it's really true.
It really is.
1415
01:26:36,484 --> 01:26:38,324
Nothing is more important to you
than dying is.
1416
01:26:38,402 --> 01:26:39,362
There you go.
1417
01:26:39,363 --> 01:26:42,113
I mean, you don't have hospital bills.
Or you don't pay rent.
1418
01:26:42,114 --> 01:26:45,283
Or buy food. Or gasoline.
And Jill never outgrows her shoes.
1419
01:26:45,284 --> 01:26:47,786
- Jill never wears shoes.
- That's funny.
1420
01:26:47,787 --> 01:26:49,746
- Oh! Let go, gypsy.
- Gypsy.
1421
01:26:49,747 --> 01:26:52,374
I tell ya, I wish I had parents
I could soak.
1422
01:26:52,375 --> 01:26:53,750
80 grand, Weaver.
1423
01:26:53,751 --> 01:26:54,751
See you later.
1424
01:26:56,128 --> 01:26:57,672
It's wine time.
1425
01:26:58,422 --> 01:27:00,048
- Wine?
- No, thank you.
1426
01:27:00,049 --> 01:27:02,259
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye, Weaver.
1427
01:27:03,803 --> 01:27:06,639
It's so pathetic, the guys they got.
1428
01:27:07,014 --> 01:27:08,765
Keith Wilder and Gordon Matthews.
1429
01:27:08,766 --> 01:27:10,350
You know we're better than they are.
1430
01:27:10,351 --> 01:27:13,062
I know we would've had the job
if we'd only been there.
1431
01:27:13,688 --> 01:27:16,231
Thank you.
If Kate hadn't had to dragged you off...
1432
01:27:16,232 --> 01:27:19,110
Just... it's my fault.
Just leave Kate out of this.
1433
01:27:20,403 --> 01:27:23,196
- Yeah, well, I've had it. I'm splitting.
- Good.
1434
01:27:23,197 --> 01:27:24,489
- The group.
- Mommy.
1435
01:27:24,490 --> 01:27:25,782
I got to make money.
1436
01:27:25,783 --> 01:27:27,534
- Sam'll do better as a single.
- Daddy.
1437
01:27:27,535 --> 01:27:30,036
- He won't do anything as a single.
- That's good, baby.
1438
01:27:30,037 --> 01:27:32,622
That's very good. You really know how
to bring a guy out.
1439
01:27:32,623 --> 01:27:34,125
You know what I mean, Weaver?
1440
01:27:35,459 --> 01:27:37,460
I don't know what you need money for.
1441
01:27:37,461 --> 01:27:39,505
You eat all our food.
And drink all our wine.
1442
01:27:39,672 --> 01:27:43,216
Well, you've wrecked my life. I might
as well be into you for something.
1443
01:27:43,217 --> 01:27:45,051
Why do you think
I won't make it as a single?
1444
01:27:45,052 --> 01:27:46,261
Because he's jealous.
1445
01:27:46,262 --> 01:27:49,639
He's a nerd and he knows nobody's going to
pay any money to see a nerd.
1446
01:27:49,640 --> 01:27:51,599
I love you, too.
1447
01:27:51,600 --> 01:27:55,563
No, because you don't work any more,
even when we're here, you don't work.
1448
01:27:56,063 --> 01:27:58,815
Remember the hours we used to put in
at the beginning.
1449
01:27:58,816 --> 01:28:01,569
I mean night after night, all night.
1450
01:28:02,319 --> 01:28:05,573
It just doesn't mean enough to you.
Music doesn't.
1451
01:28:06,073 --> 01:28:08,784
- That's a dumb lie.
- No, it isn't. It's the truth.
1452
01:28:11,162 --> 01:28:13,747
So, what are you gonna do now
on your own?
1453
01:28:13,748 --> 01:28:15,207
I don't know.
1454
01:28:15,583 --> 01:28:16,709
I was, uh...
1455
01:28:17,251 --> 01:28:20,045
I was selling stuff until I ran into you.
You know?
1456
01:28:22,798 --> 01:28:26,426
You know, Kate, being at the hospital
all the time. You got access.
1457
01:28:26,427 --> 01:28:29,888
How about it? I mean, being in the family,
you know, you owe it to me.
1458
01:28:29,889 --> 01:28:32,558
That's not really terribly funny, man.
1459
01:28:33,434 --> 01:28:35,895
Wasn't meant to be terribly funny.
1460
01:28:38,814 --> 01:28:41,525
Then you should probably
get the hell out of my house.
1461
01:28:41,817 --> 01:28:43,985
- You talking to me or her?
- I'm talking to you, man.
1462
01:28:43,986 --> 01:28:45,987
You should probably get
the hell out of my house.
1463
01:28:45,988 --> 01:28:50,200
Mmm... well, I would but I think I'd
rather stay and toast to you, John Wayne.
1464
01:28:51,410 --> 01:28:53,578
Get the hell our of my house, man.
1465
01:28:56,291 --> 01:29:00,418
And don't come back until you're
ready to apologize to my wife, pilgrim.
1466
01:29:00,419 --> 01:29:01,419
Right?
1467
01:29:02,004 --> 01:29:04,048
That's exactly right, yeah.
1468
01:29:05,800 --> 01:29:07,218
Don't hold your breath.
1469
01:29:21,065 --> 01:29:22,942
Look out for all that glass there.
1470
01:29:23,317 --> 01:29:26,444
It's so beautiful with Sam now.
1471
01:29:26,445 --> 01:29:28,322
It's better than it's ever been.
1472
01:29:28,948 --> 01:29:31,616
You should hear his music,
it's really nice.
1473
01:29:31,617 --> 01:29:32,617
Mmm.
1474
01:29:32,993 --> 01:29:36,330
In fact, they had an audition today.
He should be here pretty soon.
1475
01:29:38,707 --> 01:29:41,125
Has he got the adoption papers
for Jill yet?
1476
01:29:41,126 --> 01:29:43,087
No. He hasn't even applied yet.
1477
01:29:45,005 --> 01:29:46,005
Why?
1478
01:29:47,800 --> 01:29:48,800
Here it is.
1479
01:29:58,644 --> 01:30:01,313
- How much time does that leave me?
- Not much.
1480
01:30:01,647 --> 01:30:03,482
Well, weeks, months, days?
1481
01:30:05,150 --> 01:30:07,277
Oh, hi. I'm sorry I'm late, man.
1482
01:30:07,278 --> 01:30:09,779
I... I was looking for gypsy all morning.
1483
01:30:09,780 --> 01:30:12,116
I didn't even get to the audition.
1484
01:30:12,616 --> 01:30:15,244
The minute you left, she ran away.
1485
01:30:18,038 --> 01:30:19,081
What?
1486
01:30:20,291 --> 01:30:21,375
'Cause he knew.
1487
01:30:26,839 --> 01:30:28,674
It's in the lung.
1488
01:30:57,661 --> 01:30:58,661
Kate.
1489
01:31:00,039 --> 01:31:01,540
Kate.
1490
01:31:33,280 --> 01:31:34,280
Mmm.
1491
01:31:37,284 --> 01:31:38,910
Nora.
1492
01:31:38,911 --> 01:31:39,911
Mmm.
1493
01:31:40,579 --> 01:31:41,579
Come in.
1494
01:31:44,041 --> 01:31:46,084
Do you leave your door
unlocked like this all the time?
1495
01:31:46,085 --> 01:31:47,002
Mmm.
1496
01:31:47,003 --> 01:31:48,087
- Sam?
- Yeah.
1497
01:31:49,546 --> 01:31:50,546
Is Kate all right?
1498
01:31:51,006 --> 01:31:54,342
Oh, she's fine. She's fine.
Uh, she's upstairs asleep.
1499
01:31:54,343 --> 01:31:56,303
-Oh. Hi.
1500
01:31:57,429 --> 01:31:59,014
Uh, turn the light on. Come on in.
1501
01:31:59,723 --> 01:32:04,018
Oh, yeah, well, the thing is,
is that I wanted to...
1502
01:32:04,019 --> 01:32:05,579
I had to have somebody to talk to. See?
1503
01:32:06,063 --> 01:32:09,858
So, um, the reason is that...
1504
01:32:12,736 --> 01:32:13,861
We got the job.
1505
01:32:13,862 --> 01:32:16,739
We got the mother loving job
at o'brien's.
1506
01:32:16,740 --> 01:32:19,075
So, we start tomorrow night.
Two nights a week at o'brien's.
1507
01:32:19,076 --> 01:32:21,703
Oh, Sam, that's so great.
1508
01:32:21,704 --> 01:32:23,663
Hand me that shawl over there,
off the horse?
1509
01:32:23,664 --> 01:32:24,747
- Yeah.
- So, tell me.
1510
01:32:24,748 --> 01:32:28,042
Uh, yeah, it was Weaver. All this time,
I thought Weaver had gone home.
1511
01:32:28,043 --> 01:32:30,586
But all that time,
he's talkin' to 'em at o'brien's
1512
01:32:30,587 --> 01:32:32,046
about a real job.
1513
01:32:32,047 --> 01:32:36,092
And they hire us. They actually hire us.
Yeah.
1514
01:32:36,093 --> 01:32:38,136
- Congratulations.
- Yeah, god.
1515
01:32:38,137 --> 01:32:41,180
O'brien's. Have you any idea
who started at o'brien's?
1516
01:32:41,181 --> 01:32:43,182
- No.
- Neither have I.
1517
01:32:45,728 --> 01:32:48,397
Oh, no. It's horse riding.
1518
01:32:49,273 --> 01:32:51,525
It's Hayden in the stretch.
1519
01:32:53,277 --> 01:32:55,279
J“ look around j“
1520
01:32:55,988 --> 01:32:58,532
j“ grasses high j“
1521
01:32:59,324 --> 01:33:03,037
j“ it's the springtime of my life j“
1522
01:33:05,122 --> 01:33:09,251
j“ I'm gonna die j“
1523
01:33:10,002 --> 01:33:11,628
j“ in the chill of the damp night j“
1524
01:33:12,087 --> 01:33:14,965
I run silently and swiftly to my departure
1525
01:33:16,800 --> 01:33:18,802
I wish I had a piano.
1526
01:33:19,720 --> 01:33:21,596
I 'd play the blues.
1527
01:33:21,597 --> 01:33:24,599
We'll have a house in the Hollywood Hills
with a lot of swimming pools
1528
01:33:24,600 --> 01:33:26,017
and a lot of horses.
1529
01:33:26,018 --> 01:33:27,477
No, I know a lot of superstars
1530
01:33:27,478 --> 01:33:29,062
- and that's what they all do all the time.
- Is that what they do?
1531
01:33:29,063 --> 01:33:30,397
Yeah.
1532
01:33:37,196 --> 01:33:39,030
- What is it?
- What's what? What?
1533
01:33:39,031 --> 01:33:41,825
- What're you laughing at?
- What're you laughing at?
1534
01:33:42,034 --> 01:33:44,995
Me? I'm laughing 'cause I'm very happy
that you got the job.
1535
01:33:51,585 --> 01:33:53,003
Well, come here, then.
1536
01:33:54,713 --> 01:33:55,713
Sam...
1537
01:33:56,006 --> 01:33:57,507
No, I'm hard of hearing
1538
01:34:18,695 --> 01:34:20,739
- Sam, do you hear me?
- Hmm?
1539
01:34:20,948 --> 01:34:22,907
We're not going to make a habit of this.
1540
01:34:22,908 --> 01:34:24,660
Sorry, I can't hear a word you say.
1541
01:34:41,426 --> 01:34:42,386
Hey.
1542
01:34:42,386 --> 01:34:43,386
It's all right.
1543
01:34:46,265 --> 01:34:49,351
Wow, you smell of lavender.
1544
01:34:51,270 --> 01:34:52,980
She smells of death.
1545
01:34:56,024 --> 01:34:59,403
And I want to make things good
between Sam and me again.
1546
01:35:03,282 --> 01:35:07,327
I know the best thing way to that is to...
To make love the way we used to.
1547
01:35:10,581 --> 01:35:12,457
But I can't.
1548
01:35:15,377 --> 01:35:16,670
It hurts so.
1549
01:35:19,590 --> 01:35:20,590
How you doing?
1550
01:35:24,261 --> 01:35:25,304
What time is it?
1551
01:35:25,512 --> 01:35:26,763
Uh, it's pretty late.
1552
01:35:27,181 --> 01:35:30,058
Uh, we got the job.
1553
01:35:30,851 --> 01:35:32,643
We stayed late to rehearse tonight.
1554
01:35:32,644 --> 01:35:34,645
- You got the job.
- Yeah, two nights a week.
1555
01:35:34,646 --> 01:35:35,938
- It's fabulous.
- Ah...
1556
01:35:41,069 --> 01:35:42,946
You smell like lavender.
1557
01:35:44,698 --> 01:35:45,741
That's nice.
1558
01:35:46,992 --> 01:35:48,619
I love you, daddy.
1559
01:35:49,786 --> 01:35:51,495
- Baby.
- Of course, he gets paid.
1560
01:35:51,496 --> 01:35:54,458
He's with a union. They have to pay him.
It's a regularjob.
1561
01:35:58,003 --> 01:35:59,337
You sit right here, baby.
1562
01:35:59,338 --> 01:36:02,174
Well, if it's any of your business,
he gets paid a lot.
1563
01:36:05,302 --> 01:36:08,430
Would please stop trying
to run my life, mom.
1564
01:36:10,390 --> 01:36:13,226
Uh, hi. This is king Kong speaking.
1565
01:36:13,227 --> 01:36:17,271
Yes. You wanna know how much money I make?
No, I'll tell you how much money I make.
1566
01:36:17,272 --> 01:36:19,815
$4,000 a week.
1567
01:36:19,816 --> 01:36:23,861
Huh? No, we're just about to move
into this incredible mansion.
1568
01:36:23,862 --> 01:36:27,156
If you are good, maybe,
maybe we will invite you over.
1569
01:36:27,157 --> 01:36:29,992
Oh, yeah. No, don't call us.
We will call you.
1570
01:36:29,993 --> 01:36:34,038
Goodbye. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1571
01:36:34,039 --> 01:36:35,832
That ought to hold her for a while.
1572
01:36:35,999 --> 01:36:38,584
That was a different kind of a kiss.
1573
01:36:38,585 --> 01:36:41,420
It's just that I'm higher
than a kite right now.
1574
01:36:41,421 --> 01:36:44,423
Do you realized in six hours
we hit the big time?
1575
01:36:44,424 --> 01:36:46,176
I know. I wish I could be there.
1576
01:36:47,469 --> 01:36:49,303
Oh, but you are gonna be there.
1577
01:36:49,304 --> 01:36:51,222
- Well, Jill's just got over the cold.
- No, no, no.
1578
01:36:51,223 --> 01:36:54,267
We're gonna leave Jill some place
and you're coming with me.
1579
01:36:54,268 --> 01:36:56,228
I wanna go to the park.
1580
01:36:57,396 --> 01:36:58,813
What's going on?
1581
01:36:58,814 --> 01:37:02,276
Nothing's going on.
I just want you with me. That's all.
1582
01:37:02,442 --> 01:37:03,443
What's wrong with that?
1583
01:37:04,319 --> 01:37:05,279
Daddy.
1584
01:37:05,280 --> 01:37:06,529
What's wrong with that?
1585
01:37:06,530 --> 01:37:08,740
Sam, are you fooling around?
1586
01:37:09,032 --> 01:37:11,201
"Fooling around".
1587
01:37:12,202 --> 01:37:13,495
"Fooling around".
1588
01:37:15,455 --> 01:37:17,040
Are you having an affair?
1589
01:37:19,293 --> 01:37:24,171
You just can't stand anybody
else having center stage, can you?
1590
01:37:24,172 --> 01:37:27,091
That wasn't the question.
1591
01:37:27,092 --> 01:37:28,426
Daddy?
1592
01:37:28,427 --> 01:37:29,845
Someone's calling you.
1593
01:37:30,387 --> 01:37:32,556
- Daddy?
- The answer obviously is no.
1594
01:37:33,181 --> 01:37:36,310
Absolutely, categorically, no.
1595
01:37:43,317 --> 01:37:45,068
Sam, it's ok.
1596
01:37:47,904 --> 01:37:49,281
It doesn't matter.
1597
01:38:09,301 --> 01:38:10,427
Babysitter.
1598
01:38:10,802 --> 01:38:11,803
Nora.
1599
01:38:11,970 --> 01:38:12,929
Yeah?
1600
01:38:12,930 --> 01:38:14,638
- Nora.
- Yeah, I'm coming.
1601
01:38:14,639 --> 01:38:17,141
Coming. Coming. Coming.
1602
01:38:17,142 --> 01:38:18,267
-Hey.
1603
01:38:18,268 --> 01:38:21,854
- Oh, Sam, isn't it great? So pretty.
- Oh, yeah.
1604
01:38:21,855 --> 01:38:24,190
Uh, Kate said
that she just got over a cold
1605
01:38:24,191 --> 01:38:26,776
and that she should probably get
to bed really early.
1606
01:38:26,777 --> 01:38:28,235
- Sure. I'll do it.
- Ok.
1607
01:38:29,196 --> 01:38:30,196
You wanna come in?
1608
01:38:30,489 --> 01:38:33,783
Uh, no, I better not.
1609
01:38:33,784 --> 01:38:35,284
- Well, you're looking real fine.
- Yeah?
1610
01:38:35,285 --> 01:38:37,912
Yeah, I like it. Back's great, too.
1611
01:38:37,913 --> 01:38:38,913
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1612
01:38:41,208 --> 01:38:42,458
See you tomorrow?
1613
01:38:42,459 --> 01:38:46,046
It's, uh, difficult.
1614
01:38:47,047 --> 01:38:48,839
Yeah, but it doesn't have to be.
1615
01:38:48,840 --> 01:38:50,634
Not as long as your head's
in the right spot.
1616
01:38:53,553 --> 01:38:54,888
Go break a leg, fella.
1617
01:38:55,847 --> 01:38:58,892
- Go on. Get outta here.
- Ok, yeah. Ok. Right.
1618
01:39:15,033 --> 01:39:16,910
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
1619
01:39:17,244 --> 01:39:18,702
-I got you.
1620
01:39:18,703 --> 01:39:20,783
All right. All right. Boy, are you ok?
1621
01:39:21,081 --> 01:39:22,374
- Yeah.
- Ok.
1622
01:39:23,667 --> 01:39:24,667
Wow.
1623
01:39:28,380 --> 01:39:30,382
Hey! Where were you?
1624
01:39:30,632 --> 01:39:32,049
It's about time.
1625
01:39:32,050 --> 01:39:33,843
Yeah, would you get my guitar,
it's out in the bus.
1626
01:39:33,844 --> 01:39:35,719
We were supposed to go on
a half an hour ago.
1627
01:39:35,720 --> 01:39:38,431
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, you're sorry.
1628
01:39:41,685 --> 01:39:43,645
Pull up a chair, sit down.
Wait, wait, wait.
1629
01:39:44,062 --> 01:39:46,314
This is Tori. Tori, this is Sam and Kate.
1630
01:39:51,903 --> 01:39:53,737
You gonna be ok, here?
1631
01:39:53,738 --> 01:39:57,159
Um, I'd rather sit back.
I can hearjust as well.
1632
01:39:57,325 --> 01:39:59,743
You know, just ask the man.
He'll give you another beer.
1633
01:39:59,744 --> 01:40:00,744
Sam...
1634
01:40:01,913 --> 01:40:03,330
Uh, ladies and gentlemen.
1635
01:40:03,331 --> 01:40:04,707
- We gotta get together after.
- Sure.
1636
01:40:04,708 --> 01:40:05,791
Right on. Right on.
1637
01:40:05,792 --> 01:40:08,211
Right after the show!
1638
01:40:09,087 --> 01:40:10,087
Hi!
1639
01:40:10,630 --> 01:40:12,048
Can you hear me back there?
1640
01:40:13,258 --> 01:40:15,677
Listen, if you could settle down...
1641
01:40:16,845 --> 01:40:18,180
Can I have your attention please?
1642
01:40:18,388 --> 01:40:19,806
Hello?
1643
01:40:20,056 --> 01:40:23,684
- Somebody? Hello?
- Come on! I can't hear myself drink!
1644
01:40:25,812 --> 01:40:26,812
Yeah.
1645
01:40:33,361 --> 01:40:36,490
Hey, what's going on?
I haven't seen you in so long!
1646
01:40:36,990 --> 01:40:39,200
J“ lady j“
1647
01:40:39,201 --> 01:40:42,162
j“ are you crying? J“
1648
01:40:42,412 --> 01:40:46,124
j“ do the tears belong to me? J“
1649
01:40:48,793 --> 01:40:53,632
J“ did you think our time together j“
1650
01:40:54,299 --> 01:40:57,719
j“ is all gone? J“
1651
01:41:01,848 --> 01:41:06,186
j“ lady, you've been dreaming j“
1652
01:41:07,395 --> 01:41:12,567
j“ I'm as close as I can be j“
1653
01:41:13,693 --> 01:41:17,071
j“ and I swear to you j“
1654
01:41:17,072 --> 01:41:22,661
j“ our time has just begun j“
1655
01:41:23,245 --> 01:41:24,246
they're not good.
1656
01:41:26,873 --> 01:41:29,833
J“ close your eyes j“
1657
01:41:29,834 --> 01:41:34,464
j“ and rest your weary mind j“
1658
01:41:38,843 --> 01:41:41,971
j“ I promise j“
1659
01:41:41,972 --> 01:41:47,936
j“ I I! Stay right here beside you j“
1660
01:41:51,523 --> 01:41:56,777
j“ today our lives were joined j“
1661
01:41:56,778 --> 01:42:01,199
j“ became entwined j“
1662
01:42:03,743 --> 01:42:05,286
j“ and I wish j“
1663
01:42:05,287 --> 01:42:08,455
j“ that you could know j“
1664
01:42:08,456 --> 01:42:14,421
j“ how much I love you j“
1665
01:42:16,798 --> 01:42:21,219
j“ lady, are you happy? J“
1666
01:42:22,345 --> 01:42:27,642
j“ do you feel the way I do? J“
1667
01:42:28,727 --> 01:42:31,395
j“ are there meanings j“
1668
01:42:31,396 --> 01:42:33,648
j“ that you've never j“
1669
01:42:34,065 --> 01:42:37,902
j“ seen before? J“
1670
01:42:41,781 --> 01:42:43,575
j“ lady j“
1671
01:42:43,908 --> 01:42:47,329
j“ my sweet lady j“
1672
01:42:47,829 --> 01:42:53,752
j“ I just can't believe it's true j“
1673
01:42:54,252 --> 01:42:57,547
j“ it's like I've never j“
1674
01:42:58,089 --> 01:43:03,178
j“ ever loved before j“
1675
01:43:07,682 --> 01:43:10,476
j“ close your eyes j“
1676
01:43:10,477 --> 01:43:15,690
j“ and rest your weary mind j“
1677
01:43:19,778 --> 01:43:23,197
j“ I promise j“
1678
01:43:23,198 --> 01:43:28,286
j“I'll stay right here beside you j“
1679
01:43:32,791 --> 01:43:38,253
j“ today our lives were joined j“
1680
01:43:38,254 --> 01:43:42,509
j“ became entwined j“
1681
01:43:45,303 --> 01:43:50,099
j“ and I wish that you could know j“
1682
01:43:50,100 --> 01:43:56,022
j“ how much I love you j“
1683
01:43:56,815 --> 01:44:00,151
j“ oh, oh, my lady j“
1684
01:44:01,903 --> 01:44:04,155
j“ are you crying? J“
1685
01:44:05,281 --> 01:44:09,703
j“ do the tears belong to me? J“
1686
01:44:10,870 --> 01:44:13,789
j“ do you think j“
1687
01:44:13,790 --> 01:44:16,334
j“ our time together j“
1688
01:44:16,960 --> 01:44:19,921
j“ is all gone? J“
1689
01:44:24,175 --> 01:44:29,556
j“ lady, my sweet lady j“
1690
01:44:30,265 --> 01:44:35,520
j“ I'm as close as I can be j“
1691
01:44:36,730 --> 01:44:40,315
j“ and I swear to you j“
1692
01:44:40,316 --> 01:44:46,239
j“ our time has just begun j“
1693
01:44:59,461 --> 01:45:00,795
Clap, you dope heads.
1694
01:45:13,516 --> 01:45:15,434
Ok.
1695
01:45:15,435 --> 01:45:18,187
- Wasn't it incredible?
- Yeah.
1696
01:45:18,188 --> 01:45:20,481
At first, I thought
they were never gonna listen.
1697
01:45:20,482 --> 01:45:23,150
And then I thought,
they were never gonna clap.
1698
01:45:23,151 --> 01:45:25,445
What a gig!
1699
01:45:27,030 --> 01:45:29,698
What an incredible gig. Huh?
1700
01:45:29,699 --> 01:45:32,910
Well, shall I go downstairs
and get Jill or what?
1701
01:45:32,911 --> 01:45:36,121
- Oh, what time is it?
- It's 2:30.
1702
01:45:36,122 --> 01:45:38,208
- Then we should leave her.
- Ok.
1703
01:45:41,669 --> 01:45:43,296
- Sam.
- Mmm?
1704
01:45:43,713 --> 01:45:46,132
My tape recorder, where... where is it?
1705
01:45:49,385 --> 01:45:50,595
The door was open.
1706
01:45:52,555 --> 01:45:56,476
- And I always look the door.
- Oh, Sam.
1707
01:46:01,689 --> 01:46:02,689
Two, three, four.
1708
01:46:02,690 --> 01:46:04,608
Is everyone ready now?
Jack, are you ready?
1709
01:46:04,609 --> 01:46:05,609
We're ready.
1710
01:46:06,611 --> 01:46:07,611
We're rolling.
1711
01:46:08,404 --> 01:46:11,241
Kate, eighth interview at her apartment.
1712
01:46:11,908 --> 01:46:13,534
By now,
everyone knows Kate Hayden.
1713
01:46:13,535 --> 01:46:15,327
Knows what she's been through.
1714
01:46:15,328 --> 01:46:17,329
What's happened to her,
what happened to her tapes
1715
01:46:17,330 --> 01:46:18,330
of the hospital.
1716
01:46:18,748 --> 01:46:21,208
Uh, could we hold it?
Wait. Waitjust a minute, please.
1717
01:46:21,209 --> 01:46:25,712
Mrs. Hayden, do you think we could bring
the child in here with you?
1718
01:46:25,713 --> 01:46:27,340
Jill? Come here.
1719
01:46:29,551 --> 01:46:31,260
Beautiful.
1720
01:46:31,261 --> 01:46:32,761
That's it exactly.
1721
01:46:32,762 --> 01:46:35,973
Well, I stopped...
I stopped taking drugs or anything
1722
01:46:35,974 --> 01:46:39,227
be... or anything else for the cancer
because, um...
1723
01:46:39,769 --> 01:46:43,314
They messed my head up and I couldn't say
what I wanted to say
1724
01:46:43,565 --> 01:46:46,276
and I couldn't leave the book
I wanted to leave her.
1725
01:46:48,611 --> 01:46:52,156
So they expect me to die pretty,
pretty soon.
1726
01:46:54,951 --> 01:46:56,368
And that's really hard to say,
1727
01:46:56,369 --> 01:46:59,122
'cause all of a sudden,
there's nothing left for her.
1728
01:46:59,706 --> 01:47:03,084
I don't suppose whoever, uh, took my tapes
1729
01:47:03,251 --> 01:47:06,003
and tape recorders...
1730
01:47:06,004 --> 01:47:10,382
Recorder, um... is watching,
1731
01:47:10,383 --> 01:47:13,051
but if you are, please, um,
1732
01:47:13,052 --> 01:47:16,138
please send me back the used tapes.
1733
01:47:16,139 --> 01:47:17,891
They aren't any good to you anyway.
1734
01:47:19,309 --> 01:47:24,230
Mrs. Hayden, the station has authorized me
to present you with this new tape recorder
1735
01:47:24,981 --> 01:47:27,774
- and one dozen reels of tape.
- Thank you.
1736
01:47:27,775 --> 01:47:29,027
Jill...
1737
01:47:29,861 --> 01:47:33,280
If you ever feel the need
to talk to someone, baby,
1738
01:47:33,281 --> 01:47:34,865
- come to this book.
- More mail!
1739
01:47:34,866 --> 01:47:37,200
- Are you ready for this?
- Written words can't help much,
1740
01:47:37,201 --> 01:47:39,286
But at least it'll let you know
1741
01:47:39,287 --> 01:47:40,663
how much I would've cared.
1742
01:47:41,372 --> 01:47:43,207
For whatever was wrong.
1743
01:47:44,500 --> 01:47:46,543
I love you so much, baby.
1744
01:47:46,544 --> 01:47:48,379
I got it.
1745
01:47:52,425 --> 01:47:53,425
Hello?
1746
01:47:54,135 --> 01:47:56,595
No, no. This is a friend of hers,
can I help you?
1747
01:47:56,596 --> 01:47:58,931
I wish I could be with you
when you're old enough to read this.
1748
01:47:58,932 --> 01:48:01,516
No, she can't be at the phone
right now, can I take a message?
1749
01:48:01,517 --> 01:48:03,185
I wonder what the world's gonna be
like then.
1750
01:48:03,186 --> 01:48:04,346
She's in the bathroom.
1751
01:48:05,438 --> 01:48:07,838
Yes. Papaya juice?
1752
01:48:08,983 --> 01:48:11,360
Yes, I've got that. Ok.
1753
01:48:11,361 --> 01:48:13,153
Yeah, I'll make sure she gets it.
1754
01:48:13,154 --> 01:48:14,948
Thank you very much. Bye-bye.
1755
01:48:16,741 --> 01:48:20,994
This one says papaya juice, beet root,
soybean oil in a blender.
1756
01:48:20,995 --> 01:48:22,789
Six times a day for six weeks.
1757
01:48:23,498 --> 01:48:25,166
People. God bless 'em.
1758
01:48:25,917 --> 01:48:28,669
Please remember that sex is a function,
1759
01:48:28,670 --> 01:48:30,129
and love is an emotion.
1760
01:48:30,922 --> 01:48:33,424
Don't just sleep with any man for sex.
1761
01:48:34,926 --> 01:48:38,680
Because when you're in love,
there's a bond of giving and receiving.
1762
01:48:39,514 --> 01:48:41,474
It's so important, Jill.
1763
01:48:42,850 --> 01:48:45,269
If any sort of relationship
is gonna survive.
1764
01:48:46,771 --> 01:48:50,066
Well, east Germany's got the cure today.
1765
01:48:51,859 --> 01:48:54,444
Tomorrow I suppose
it's gonna be red China, right?
1766
01:48:54,445 --> 01:48:56,863
- Well, listen to this.
- Hmm. What?
1767
01:48:56,864 --> 01:48:58,949
"God has a reason for everything,
Mrs. Hayden.
1768
01:48:58,950 --> 01:49:01,034
Search your soul, find your sin.
1769
01:49:01,035 --> 01:49:03,830
For you have indeed committed
a terrible..."
1770
01:49:04,872 --> 01:49:06,541
I'm going to miss you, Sam.
1771
01:49:09,085 --> 01:49:11,671
The way you touch me and comfort me
when I'm sad.
1772
01:49:13,673 --> 01:49:15,341
And the way you smile.
1773
01:49:16,342 --> 01:49:18,511
And the way you dance around
when you're happy.
1774
01:49:21,347 --> 01:49:23,725
I can't die and leave you guys.
1775
01:49:24,809 --> 01:49:27,895
Who's going to clean the toilet?
Who's going to clean the oven?
1776
01:49:32,650 --> 01:49:34,569
What's the matter with you, god?
1777
01:49:35,319 --> 01:49:37,112
My family's not a bunch of boy scouts
1778
01:49:37,113 --> 01:49:39,574
who can figure out all
these things for themselves.
1779
01:49:43,286 --> 01:49:44,996
That's what you taught me to do.
1780
01:49:46,914 --> 01:49:48,583
That's why I'm here.
1781
01:49:51,627 --> 01:49:53,629
God, you're some kind of idiot!
1782
01:49:55,965 --> 01:49:58,551
To pull something like this.
1783
01:49:59,385 --> 01:50:01,095
What do you gain?
1784
01:50:03,681 --> 01:50:05,558
I just don't understand.
1785
01:50:10,605 --> 01:50:14,108
Jill is a beautiful little girl
who needs a mother to love her.
1786
01:50:18,446 --> 01:50:21,949
[Feel like it, right now, like death.
1787
01:50:24,285 --> 01:50:26,454
I get so close at night.
1788
01:50:59,028 --> 01:51:00,780
Are you all right, mommy?
1789
01:51:08,663 --> 01:51:11,666
What? Where is it? What? What?
1790
01:51:11,833 --> 01:51:14,084
You can't breathe? You can't breathe?
1791
01:51:19,590 --> 01:51:23,427
My mother took us
to the Seattle zoo.
1792
01:51:23,803 --> 01:51:26,304
And we were feeding the elephants,
pat and I.
1793
01:51:26,305 --> 01:51:28,974
We ran out of peanuts and popcorn
and they were still hungry
1794
01:51:28,975 --> 01:51:33,270
so I grabbed my white sandals off my feet
and threw them in.
1795
01:51:33,271 --> 01:51:36,857
Pat thought it was a great idea
and started to take all her clothes off
1796
01:51:36,858 --> 01:51:39,818
and throw them but mom stopped her.
1797
01:51:39,819 --> 01:51:43,072
Oh, I hated those stupid sandals anyway.
1798
01:51:45,575 --> 01:51:47,826
Around Christmas time we used
to collect pine cones
1799
01:51:47,827 --> 01:51:50,453
for an old lady. I think it was, uh...
1800
01:51:50,454 --> 01:51:52,164
I think it was Mrs. Seewald,
1801
01:51:52,165 --> 01:51:55,251
Mrs. Seewald, who made wreaths
for the church.
1802
01:51:56,294 --> 01:51:58,045
She died before I was ten.
1803
01:51:59,297 --> 01:52:02,008
J“ I remember being with you j“
1804
01:52:02,633 --> 01:52:05,720
j“ I remember dreaming with you j“
1805
01:52:06,095 --> 01:52:09,431
j“ I remember loving you j“
1806
01:52:09,432 --> 01:52:15,354
j“ you were mine j“
1807
01:52:17,273 --> 01:52:20,985
j“ and now the day seemed so long j“
1808
01:52:21,235 --> 01:52:22,235
j“ mmmj“
1809
01:52:23,946 --> 01:52:27,783
j“ and I can't face the night alone j“
1810
01:52:29,827 --> 01:52:31,828
j“ I beg you, please j“
1811
01:52:31,829 --> 01:52:37,752
j“ won't you please come home? J“
1812
01:52:44,884 --> 01:52:46,010
Sam?
1813
01:52:47,094 --> 01:52:48,094
Hey!
1814
01:52:49,138 --> 01:52:50,138
Hi.
1815
01:52:50,681 --> 01:52:53,684
Hi, sweet lady. How do you feel?
1816
01:52:56,354 --> 01:52:57,939
Nothing hurts any more.
1817
01:52:59,273 --> 01:53:01,483
It's heaven to breathe
without it hurting.
1818
01:53:04,862 --> 01:53:06,906
In that case.
1819
01:53:11,202 --> 01:53:13,703
I brought my competition.
1820
01:53:13,704 --> 01:53:14,704
Sam.
1821
01:53:16,791 --> 01:53:18,834
I wish I had a piano.
1822
01:53:19,377 --> 01:53:21,254
So, I could play Jill a lullaby.
1823
01:53:23,256 --> 01:53:25,299
A blues lullaby.
1824
01:53:28,135 --> 01:53:30,054
How I wish I were up in the mountains.
1825
01:53:33,266 --> 01:53:35,601
I hope you put me there.
1826
01:53:36,227 --> 01:53:37,436
Sam?
1827
01:53:38,020 --> 01:53:39,146
It's me, baby.
1828
01:53:40,815 --> 01:53:42,941
- Where's Sam?
- He had to go work.
1829
01:53:42,942 --> 01:53:46,445
- And Jill's with the people upstairs.
- I keep dreaming about her.
1830
01:53:46,946 --> 01:53:49,365
Oh, Kate. Hey.
1831
01:53:49,615 --> 01:53:52,285
Don't worry about Jill.
She's gonna be just fine.
1832
01:53:52,994 --> 01:53:54,429
You know, she's a tough little girl.
1833
01:53:54,453 --> 01:53:56,246
I worry about her all the time.
1834
01:53:56,247 --> 01:54:00,459
There's no need to. There's lots of people
that love her and would take care of her.
1835
01:54:03,296 --> 01:54:05,463
- Think they'll put her in an orphanage?
- No.
1836
01:54:05,464 --> 01:54:07,716
Now, why would they want
to do a thing like that?
1837
01:54:07,717 --> 01:54:10,677
And Sam, Sam's not gonna...
1838
01:54:12,013 --> 01:54:13,389
Abandon her?
1839
01:54:15,433 --> 01:54:17,100
I don't know.
1840
01:54:17,101 --> 01:54:19,061
She's not really his.
1841
01:54:20,688 --> 01:54:23,607
Why should he be saddled with her
for the rest of his life.
1842
01:54:26,569 --> 01:54:29,697
After all this crud with me.
1843
01:54:29,947 --> 01:54:31,615
Oh, it's enough.
1844
01:54:32,074 --> 01:54:35,202
When I go he ought to just be able
to walk away.
1845
01:54:35,911 --> 01:54:41,125
If he does, I'll take Jill.
If you want me to.
1846
01:54:42,668 --> 01:54:45,004
Well, it's between you and Dr. Gillman.
1847
01:54:45,588 --> 01:54:48,591
She's so busy all the time.
1848
01:54:48,799 --> 01:54:52,552
- So I win by default, right?
- You know what I mean.
1849
01:54:52,553 --> 01:54:57,183
Kate... Kate, I'd raise her
real right, anyway.
1850
01:54:58,642 --> 01:55:01,061
Sam's parents are going to try to get her.
1851
01:55:01,062 --> 01:55:02,521
Or my parents.
1852
01:55:02,813 --> 01:55:04,565
And I don't want them to have her.
1853
01:55:05,232 --> 01:55:06,901
It's really important to me.
1854
01:55:07,777 --> 01:55:10,696
You know, I don't know anything
about any legal stuff...
1855
01:55:10,988 --> 01:55:12,782
But, you know...
1856
01:55:13,324 --> 01:55:15,368
Maybe if you put it down on a tape,
1857
01:55:16,202 --> 01:55:19,747
then if there's any hassle, then it won't
be my word against theirs.
1858
01:55:27,922 --> 01:55:30,049
What is it about me that bothers you,
Kate?
1859
01:55:31,509 --> 01:55:34,302
You're untidy.
1860
01:55:34,303 --> 01:55:35,929
Yeah, I'm untidy.
1861
01:55:35,930 --> 01:55:38,014
But tidy mothers raise neurotic daughters.
1862
01:55:38,015 --> 01:55:39,975
Yes. My mother was tidy.
1863
01:55:47,691 --> 01:55:49,735
You've been sleeping with Sam.
1864
01:55:51,779 --> 01:55:53,614
Not any more.
1865
01:55:54,907 --> 01:55:59,078
It wasn't such a terrible thing to do
under the circumstances, was it?
1866
01:56:00,871 --> 01:56:02,915
No, I guess not.
1867
01:56:06,502 --> 01:56:08,629
It's just that I don't want Jill...
1868
01:56:09,004 --> 01:56:10,589
Raised by a loose woman?
1869
01:56:10,965 --> 01:56:14,259
Loose and untidy.
1870
01:56:14,260 --> 01:56:16,720
That's so stuffy and middle class
of you, my dear.
1871
01:56:17,263 --> 01:56:18,722
-Sorry.
1872
01:56:23,269 --> 01:56:26,522
I meant to put all the things
I made for Jill in a cedar chest.
1873
01:56:28,023 --> 01:56:29,783
- The quilt and things.
- Yeah, I know.
1874
01:56:30,192 --> 01:56:31,152
I'll do that.
1875
01:56:31,153 --> 01:56:34,447
- And if the tapes ever turn up...
- I'll have them typed and bound.
1876
01:56:37,283 --> 01:56:40,994
But you almost have everything
re-recorded anyway, don't you?
1877
01:56:40,995 --> 01:56:44,123
- Well, I don't know. I'm so disorganized.
- Oh, no, you're not.
1878
01:56:44,415 --> 01:56:45,790
Dying's such a hassle.
1879
01:56:45,791 --> 01:56:48,626
No, but you don't have to worry
about anything,
1880
01:56:48,627 --> 01:56:51,087
just leave everything to me
1881
01:56:51,088 --> 01:56:54,258
and... and I'll sort it all out
just the way you want it.
1882
01:56:55,759 --> 01:56:58,136
- You wanna...
- Call Dr. Gillman.
1883
01:56:58,137 --> 01:56:59,137
Why?
1884
01:56:59,889 --> 01:57:02,891
Don't... can I get you anything?
You want pain pills?
1885
01:57:05,060 --> 01:57:06,978
- There's...
- Sam.
1886
01:57:06,979 --> 01:57:07,979
What?
1887
01:57:11,817 --> 01:57:12,860
Wait.
1888
01:57:13,986 --> 01:57:14,986
Please.
1889
01:57:27,458 --> 01:57:31,837
You fade away and come back.
Like some artsy-craftsy movie.
1890
01:57:34,965 --> 01:57:37,510
And so do the walls.
1891
01:57:40,721 --> 01:57:42,389
Bring your piano.
1892
01:57:47,686 --> 01:57:48,938
Please.
1893
01:57:52,942 --> 01:57:56,570
- Just wait a bit please.
- Oh. About Jill.
1894
01:57:56,904 --> 01:58:00,658
All right. I'm gonna to take care of Jill.
I told you that before.
1895
01:58:01,116 --> 01:58:03,160
Kate, I love Jill.
1896
01:58:04,703 --> 01:58:06,372
I hope you marry Nora.
1897
01:58:07,164 --> 01:58:09,666
I just... [just wanna be married to you.
1898
01:58:09,667 --> 01:58:12,794
Why are you always trying to pawn me off
on somebody else.
1899
01:58:12,795 --> 01:58:14,630
All we gotta do is...
1900
01:58:14,922 --> 01:58:19,551
Just get a little rest. And get you better
and then we'll all go home together.
1901
01:58:19,552 --> 01:58:22,053
Nora's good with Jill.
1902
01:58:22,054 --> 01:58:25,391
Would you cut it out
with this Nora stuff?
1903
01:58:26,225 --> 01:58:29,519
If I can accept dying,
why can't anybody else?
1904
01:58:29,520 --> 01:58:30,728
Hello, Kate.
1905
01:58:30,729 --> 01:58:34,108
If you ask me how I'm feeling
I'll strangle you.
1906
01:58:35,025 --> 01:58:37,318
What do you want for lunch,
that's all I want to know.
1907
01:58:37,319 --> 01:58:39,446
- A pain pill.
- Ok.
1908
01:58:39,905 --> 01:58:43,658
And you won't give me any other drugs
to prolong it. Promise?
1909
01:58:43,659 --> 01:58:44,659
Promise.
1910
01:58:47,037 --> 01:58:49,998
I've got... got some stuff
to do in the book.
1911
01:58:49,999 --> 01:58:53,543
And I can't do it with that stuff
that messes my head up.
1912
01:58:53,544 --> 01:58:55,169
Whenever you do want
a pain pill,
1913
01:58:55,170 --> 01:58:58,298
all you have to do is ring for the nurse
and she'll bring you one, ok?
1914
01:58:58,299 --> 01:58:59,757
And you're not going to put
any other stuff
1915
01:58:59,758 --> 01:59:02,760
- in the pain pills, are you?
- No, of course not.
1916
01:59:02,761 --> 01:59:07,348
I wanna die on my own clock.
That's what I want.
1917
01:59:07,349 --> 01:59:09,309
Ok, I'm sorry.
1918
01:59:09,310 --> 01:59:11,228
I'm sorry. I can't take this.
1919
01:59:18,319 --> 01:59:22,405
What'd I tell you?
Mr. Vanishing act.
1920
01:59:26,118 --> 01:59:27,118
Well...
1921
01:59:28,245 --> 01:59:30,581
It's hard to watch somebody die.
1922
01:59:31,540 --> 01:59:33,626
Probably harder than it is to die.
1923
01:59:42,801 --> 01:59:45,262
What am I thinking about?
1924
01:59:49,933 --> 01:59:53,604
About friends and places
and dogs I've had.
1925
01:59:54,897 --> 01:59:56,774
Thinking about my little girl.
1926
02:00:00,110 --> 02:00:02,153
Kind of stubby.
1927
02:00:02,154 --> 02:00:03,489
Long blond hair.
1928
02:00:05,699 --> 02:00:08,869
With an attitude
about life that makes me feel small.
1929
02:00:11,538 --> 02:00:12,998
Thinking about dying.
1930
02:00:13,957 --> 02:00:17,044
Feeling rage that soon there
won't be no more of me.
1931
02:00:20,714 --> 02:00:23,634
But a feeling of melancholy comes,
you know?
1932
02:00:25,052 --> 02:00:27,888
It's really a beautiful feeling.
1933
02:00:28,889 --> 02:00:31,350
When you know you've done
all you know how to do
1934
02:00:32,685 --> 02:00:36,105
and all that's left
is a little bit of tomorrow.
1935
02:00:37,064 --> 02:00:39,274
I was a virgin when I married David.
1936
02:00:40,275 --> 02:00:42,277
Can you believe that?
1937
02:00:45,072 --> 02:00:47,658
All the things she accused me of.
1938
02:00:52,788 --> 02:00:56,375
I loved my keeping myself a virgin
because I loved her.
1939
02:00:57,835 --> 02:00:59,878
Because I believed her.
1940
02:01:01,088 --> 02:01:04,466
Even when she stopped believing me,
I went on believing her.
1941
02:01:09,888 --> 02:01:11,723
She taught me what...
1942
02:01:11,724 --> 02:01:13,099
She taught me what love was
1943
02:01:13,100 --> 02:01:16,144
when she taught me the names
of the mountain flowers.
1944
02:01:16,145 --> 02:01:17,187
Yeah?
1945
02:01:18,313 --> 02:01:20,232
And to speak out for myself.
1946
02:01:22,317 --> 02:01:25,404
And she gave me my first dog.
1947
02:01:27,614 --> 02:01:30,659
How could she accuse me
of being a tramp?
1948
02:01:37,332 --> 02:01:38,625
Mommy...
1949
02:01:43,338 --> 02:01:45,382
Please, mommy.
1950
02:01:47,301 --> 02:01:49,094
Tell me you love me.
1951
02:01:51,847 --> 02:01:54,016
Because I hurt so bad
1952
02:01:56,268 --> 02:01:59,021
and I need my mommy to comfort me.
1953
02:02:03,275 --> 02:02:04,526
I know, Kate.
1954
02:02:07,488 --> 02:02:08,822
I'll tell her.
1955
02:02:12,409 --> 02:02:15,621
Tell her nothing. Tell her to go to hell!
1956
02:02:31,929 --> 02:02:35,432
It's hard now. Very hard.
1957
02:02:37,559 --> 02:02:40,520
I keep thinking let me wake up
just one more morning.
1958
02:02:40,521 --> 02:02:43,232
I have so much to say to Jill.
1959
02:02:45,317 --> 02:02:46,902
It's so important.
1960
02:02:53,242 --> 02:02:55,035
Or is it so important?
1961
02:02:59,498 --> 02:03:01,959
I don't even know how to play the piano.
1962
02:03:06,547 --> 02:03:08,674
Goodbye, Jill.
1963
02:03:09,925 --> 02:03:11,718
Goodbye, Dr. Gillman.
1964
02:03:13,929 --> 02:03:15,347
Goodbye, Sam.
1965
02:03:18,725 --> 02:03:23,105
Jill, my love. My little love.
1966
02:03:25,274 --> 02:03:27,192
Hang in there, baby.
1967
02:03:39,621 --> 02:03:42,291
Hi, daddy!
1968
02:04:01,602 --> 02:04:02,728
She died.
1969
02:04:05,105 --> 02:04:06,148
Didn't she?
1970
02:04:07,274 --> 02:04:08,859
I want my...
1971
02:04:20,829 --> 02:04:25,083
I drove this thing 425 miles already. Huh.
1972
02:04:27,836 --> 02:04:30,463
Jill. Wanna go for a ride?
1973
02:04:30,464 --> 02:04:32,382
Huh? Huh?
1974
02:04:32,841 --> 02:04:35,719
- Here's a flower for you!
- Oh, thanks, baby.
1975
02:04:36,219 --> 02:04:39,389
Thanks. Let me unbutton my coat.
Look out, it's bur... it's hot.
1976
02:04:40,724 --> 02:04:43,518
Yeah. Yeah, ok.
I'll just put this coat around here.
1977
02:04:43,977 --> 02:04:46,980
I'll button you in, can you breathe? Huh?
1978
02:04:48,190 --> 02:04:50,400
Ok, ready to go? Look out.
1979
02:04:53,320 --> 02:04:54,321
Yeah, ok.
1980
02:05:16,510 --> 02:05:21,765
J“ lady, my sweet lady j“
1981
02:05:22,307 --> 02:05:27,354
j“ I'm as close as I can be j“
1982
02:05:29,064 --> 02:05:31,817
j“ and I swear to you j“
1983
02:05:32,317 --> 02:05:40,317
j“ our time has just begun j“148014
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