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1
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MARIA:
Maggie.
2
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:13,724
Hello!
3
00:00:13,722 --> 00:00:15,142
Tell me what's going on.
4
00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:16,430
Something's going on?
5
00:00:16,433 --> 00:00:18,143
Don't hide in the fridge.
6
00:00:18,143 --> 00:00:21,403
I may not be a psychic, but I'm your
mother, which is the exact same thing.
7
00:00:21,396 --> 00:00:22,976
Something's not right with you.
8
00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:25,034
Are you being harassed?
9
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,235
Feels like it.
10
00:00:26,235 --> 00:00:28,605
- I'm serious. If you've gotten in
too deep with one of those groups...
11
00:00:28,612 --> 00:00:30,452
- Huh?
- ...there's always help.
12
00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:32,657
Just tell me you're not in a sex cult.
13
00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:34,658
If one more person I know...
14
00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:36,250
Calm down.
15
00:00:36,245 --> 00:00:38,365
You know I hate group activities.
16
00:00:38,789 --> 00:00:40,579
Then explain this.
17
00:00:40,582 --> 00:00:41,922
Came for you today.
18
00:00:41,917 --> 00:00:43,377
Reeks of sex and patchouli.
19
00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:44,797
♪
20
00:00:44,795 --> 00:00:45,835
Angel!
21
00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:48,876
I'm freaking out.
22
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:53,723
How does Julius Moon
even know who we are?
23
00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:55,890
Girl, I have the exact same question!
24
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:58,929
This is a hard invitation to come by.
You know about these parties, right?
25
00:00:58,934 --> 00:01:00,984
- Uh-uh.
- Okay, so once upon a time,
26
00:01:00,978 --> 00:01:02,768
I had a friend with benefits in New York.
27
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:04,481
- The finance guy
in the Meatpacking District.
28
00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:06,531
- No, the meatpacking guy
in the Finance District.
29
00:01:06,525 --> 00:01:09,525
Anyway, his ex-husband's
wedding planner's side dish
30
00:01:09,528 --> 00:01:11,858
was a piano player
for these fancy parties--
31
00:01:11,864 --> 00:01:13,124
Wait. Who is the main character here?
32
00:01:13,115 --> 00:01:14,445
Girl, the point is
33
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:16,739
they have been holding exclusive
34
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,793
mystic gatherings for years.
35
00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:20,957
We're talking cocktails, games,
36
00:01:20,956 --> 00:01:23,166
- a couple of hot tarts being passed around.
- Mm!
37
00:01:23,166 --> 00:01:24,376
Maybe some food, too.
38
00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:25,996
I can't wait!
39
00:01:26,003 --> 00:01:28,383
I've never been in a room
full of only psychics.
40
00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:31,130
We have spent enough
of our lives being outsiders.
41
00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:32,133
Yes, girl.
42
00:01:32,134 --> 00:01:34,434
It is time for us to finally enjoy
43
00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:37,388
a night of blending the hell in.
44
00:01:37,389 --> 00:01:39,349
I think I'll wear feathers.
45
00:01:41,185 --> 00:01:44,185
♪
46
00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:48,775
-We're gonna have a great night...
-Can't believe it, yeah.
47
00:01:48,775 --> 00:01:52,605
- Oh ho! What a fancy coat!
I hope we're not going to the same place,
48
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,993
'cause if so, we'd be really underdressed.
49
00:01:54,990 --> 00:01:57,080
Yeah. Where are you guys off to?
50
00:01:57,075 --> 00:02:00,285
- Oh, Angel and I are going
to a psychic thing.
51
00:02:00,287 --> 00:02:03,417
It's nothing. Just the who's who
event of the season.
52
00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:04,785
Psychics have seasons?
53
00:02:05,918 --> 00:02:07,538
- You are bragging,
and our car is here. Come on.
54
00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:09,134
Okay! We have to go! Bye!
55
00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:10,379
- Bye.
- Bye.
56
00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:13,384
- Oh, that's a hot little loaf.
Where you going with that?
57
00:02:13,383 --> 00:02:15,473
- Oh, we're going to a couples dinner
at Amy and Dave's.
58
00:02:15,469 --> 00:02:16,969
Couples dinner. Yeah.
59
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:18,560
- Hey, you should join us.
- Yes.
60
00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:22,305
- Oh, I couldn't possibly.
I don't want to intrude.
61
00:02:22,309 --> 00:02:24,139
Bonjour!
62
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:27,564
Le beer is here.
63
00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:29,864
Louise! You sneaky little surpriser.
64
00:02:29,858 --> 00:02:31,488
- Hey...
- Aw. Hi.
65
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:33,775
I hope I'm not crashing.
You know, I hate to...
66
00:02:33,779 --> 00:02:36,989
- pop the couple bubble.
- Now, you stop it. You stop right now.
67
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:38,530
You know you are always welcome here.
68
00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:39,664
- Thanks.
- Now, take off
69
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,540
your nasty little shoes.
Should've left them by the door.
70
00:02:41,537 --> 00:02:42,537
- Oh.
- Thank you.
71
00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:44,408
- Hey, hey!
- Hi! How are you?
72
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:46,214
Hey, why don't you invite Plant Guy?
73
00:02:46,208 --> 00:02:48,208
Oh, that died, remember?
74
00:02:48,210 --> 00:02:50,050
Yeah, just like the ficus he gave me.
75
00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:53,045
- Well, what about that guy who beatboxes?
The law student?
76
00:02:53,048 --> 00:02:54,838
Oh, couldn't get him to stop rapping
77
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:57,222
about constitutional law. It was awful.
78
00:02:57,219 --> 00:02:58,719
Weren't there also two DJs?
79
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,680
Yeah. Croatia, secret family.
80
00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:04,062
It's just really rough out there.
81
00:03:04,059 --> 00:03:05,729
Oh...
82
00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:07,147
Well, we hate them.
83
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:09,145
OVERLAPPING:
Yeah. They sucked. The worst.
84
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:12,027
- I liked the beatboxer.
- No, you don't. You don't.
85
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:13,315
♪
86
00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:15,448
Girl, we have arrived.
87
00:03:15,445 --> 00:03:16,815
Look at this place.
88
00:03:16,822 --> 00:03:19,872
- Clearly, we're not charging enough.
- I mean...
89
00:03:20,576 --> 00:03:23,496
- Angel, if we die tonight,
I'm at peace with that.
90
00:03:23,495 --> 00:03:25,955
- Girl, they can bury us together.
91
00:03:27,583 --> 00:03:30,253
- Hello.
- Hello, welcome.
92
00:03:30,252 --> 00:03:32,802
Mr. Moon asks that you
hand over your phones.
93
00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:34,456
- Oh.
- Oh. Okay.
94
00:03:34,464 --> 00:03:37,724
- And don't stand too close to the art
or it'll go "beep"!
95
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:38,968
That's intimidating.
96
00:03:38,969 --> 00:03:40,139
Enjoy the evening.
97
00:03:40,137 --> 00:03:41,717
Thank you.
98
00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:44,352
- Why did I curtsy?
- Oh, come on.
99
00:03:44,349 --> 00:03:46,229
No phones. You don't know this,
100
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:49,146
- but this is just like an orgy.
- Oh.
101
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:52,766
Angel, I can't believe everyone
at this party is psychic.
102
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:54,864
- I know.
- It's-- Oh my gosh.
103
00:03:54,860 --> 00:03:56,570
The energy in this room is amazing.
104
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:59,320
Yes, ma'am.
105
00:03:59,323 --> 00:04:00,913
You have your clairvoyants,
106
00:04:00,908 --> 00:04:02,448
your mediums,
107
00:04:02,451 --> 00:04:03,991
people who work with cards,
108
00:04:03,994 --> 00:04:06,044
crystals...
109
00:04:06,038 --> 00:04:08,328
- And the ones who really matter.
- Wait, Angel,
110
00:04:08,332 --> 00:04:10,382
why am I so nervous?
What if they don't like me
111
00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:12,625
and I don't get invited back? Help.
112
00:04:12,628 --> 00:04:14,508
Honey, breathe, breathe, breathe, okay?
113
00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:17,665
Oh, you remind me of me
at my first pride.
114
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:19,804
Terrified, blonde, skinny.
115
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:22,681
Trust me. You'll be stripping to
a Bonnie Raitt song in no time.
116
00:04:22,679 --> 00:04:24,679
- Oh, I like Bonnie Raitt.
- Yes. Come on.
117
00:04:31,146 --> 00:04:32,976
So, Louise...
118
00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:34,691
tell us everything
about not being partnered.
119
00:04:35,317 --> 00:04:36,857
What's it like?
Are you on the apps?
120
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:40,240
- Uh, yeah. I'm on the apps.
I beta-tested the apps.
121
00:04:40,239 --> 00:04:42,279
I'm what the developers
call a lifer.
122
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,122
You know, I've been with Ben so long,
123
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,867
I've never even used a dating app.
124
00:04:45,869 --> 00:04:48,409
Do you really just swipe...
infinite men?
125
00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:51,293
I mean, yeah, basically.
126
00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:53,211
Look, when you start out, it's amazing,
127
00:04:53,210 --> 00:04:54,550
right? You're just matching
128
00:04:54,545 --> 00:04:57,165
with all these hot marketing bros
who are "into whiskey."
129
00:04:57,172 --> 00:04:59,682
So you Google it,
look up a fun fact to bring up,
130
00:04:59,675 --> 00:05:02,085
like how whiskey is the state
beverage of Alabama.
131
00:05:02,094 --> 00:05:04,514
- Did not know that.
132
00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:07,393
- You bring that up on the date,
but it gets no reaction.
133
00:05:07,391 --> 00:05:09,891
And then you realize not only is this guy
134
00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:11,523
not that into whiskey,
135
00:05:11,520 --> 00:05:14,440
he's not that into getting
to know who I am.
136
00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:15,609
- Aw.
- You know?
137
00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:18,237
So you go back on the carousel,
and you ride it
138
00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:19,525
around and around,
139
00:05:19,528 --> 00:05:22,488
just slowly lowering your standards,
140
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:23,949
date after date.
141
00:05:23,949 --> 00:05:25,239
And you just wonder
142
00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:26,662
what the hell you're doing wrong,
143
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:29,450
and how it is that everybody else
has found the one except for you.
144
00:05:33,542 --> 00:05:34,922
AMY:
Girl, look at me.
145
00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:36,168
You are such a catch.
146
00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:38,210
Now, if I was matchmaking you,
147
00:05:38,213 --> 00:05:39,923
I could find you an amazing guy in, like,
148
00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:41,723
negative one seconds.
149
00:05:41,717 --> 00:05:43,137
JESSIE:
Wait.
150
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:46,045
Can we try this?
Like, swipe for you as a group?
151
00:05:46,054 --> 00:05:47,064
Is that crazy?
152
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:49,305
I mean, okay. It's not like
153
00:05:49,308 --> 00:05:51,688
this will end with me being more alone.
154
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,475
- Unless you end up
in one of those relationships
155
00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:55,268
where you end up
more alone than ever.
156
00:05:56,398 --> 00:05:57,818
- Okay, Louise,
give me your phone.
157
00:05:58,567 --> 00:06:00,487
We are getting you a man.
158
00:06:00,986 --> 00:06:02,776
MAN:
Well, I'm a palm reader by trade
159
00:06:02,779 --> 00:06:04,819
and a sculptor by hobby.
160
00:06:04,823 --> 00:06:06,533
I really like working with my hands.
161
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,123
Well, I have two of those.
162
00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:11,158
- Why don't we work on them right now?
Alright...
163
00:06:11,163 --> 00:06:12,833
Ooh! Hi.
164
00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:14,581
I'm Maggie. It's so nice...
165
00:06:18,086 --> 00:06:20,916
- I'm so sorry. Oh my god.
I just related to that too hard.
166
00:06:20,923 --> 00:06:23,013
Hi! I'm Allegra.
167
00:06:23,008 --> 00:06:24,588
I'm Maggie.
168
00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:27,474
Mm, hello.
169
00:06:27,471 --> 00:06:30,101
Are you gonna be my wing woman
or am I going to be yours?
170
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:32,178
Maybe we should just be sister wives.
171
00:06:32,184 --> 00:06:34,194
- Honestly, I'd be down.
172
00:06:34,186 --> 00:06:36,266
Isn't it crazy,
seeing a whole group of us?
173
00:06:36,271 --> 00:06:39,861
Yeah. Everyone here is so... mystical.
174
00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:41,898
I feel like I don't really look the part.
175
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,862
- Oh, I always feel like that.
I'm just used to being
176
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:46,202
the weirdo in my friend group
who gets random energy flashes
177
00:06:46,198 --> 00:06:47,948
- at the supermarket.
- Right?
178
00:06:47,950 --> 00:06:49,490
I have had some low moments
179
00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:51,703
in the candy aisle.
On multiple levels.
180
00:06:55,958 --> 00:06:58,708
- Good evening!
I'm Julius Moon.
181
00:06:58,710 --> 00:07:01,090
Welcome to this year's psychic gathering.
182
00:07:01,088 --> 00:07:03,468
This is a rarefied group of mystics,
183
00:07:03,465 --> 00:07:05,545
and it's an honor
to have you all present.
184
00:07:05,551 --> 00:07:07,761
To kick us off tonight.
I planned a special game
185
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,351
to get the conversation flowing.
186
00:07:10,347 --> 00:07:11,517
Would you like to play?
187
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:12,885
ALL:
Yes!
188
00:07:12,891 --> 00:07:15,231
- This being LA,
I've hired an actor,
189
00:07:15,227 --> 00:07:18,437
who is standing
in this very room right now,
190
00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,818
pretending to be psychic.
191
00:07:20,816 --> 00:07:23,526
Using every form
of perception you have,
192
00:07:23,527 --> 00:07:26,567
can you identify the decoy
and prove yourself
193
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:29,372
to be the most
powerful psychic here?
194
00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:31,702
Let the hunt begin!
195
00:07:34,288 --> 00:07:35,908
♪
196
00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:39,916
♪
197
00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:42,838
- So if you're psychic,
how do you spend the solstice?
198
00:07:42,838 --> 00:07:45,878
Um, stuck in traffic usually.
199
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:48,010
So, how long have you been a medium?
200
00:07:48,010 --> 00:07:49,510
At least seven lifetimes.
201
00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:51,511
That's very cool.
202
00:07:52,306 --> 00:07:53,806
I'm sorry. You have something on your...
203
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:55,557
- Do you mind if I just...
- Okay.
204
00:07:56,894 --> 00:07:58,854
If you are
listening to this audiobook,
205
00:07:58,854 --> 00:08:01,944
then you, or someone
you know, hates their mother.
206
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:05,781
Ah, couldn't get it.
207
00:08:05,777 --> 00:08:07,697
Well, see you in the next lifetime.
208
00:08:07,696 --> 00:08:09,196
♪
209
00:08:09,198 --> 00:08:10,618
Number eight.
210
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:14,159
That's a beautiful ring.
211
00:08:14,620 --> 00:08:17,500
- I foresee the death
of every man I meet.
212
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,497
It's why I wear black every day
and only dine at the Ritz.
213
00:08:24,046 --> 00:08:27,046
I found it in the seat cushion
on a Southwest flight.
214
00:08:27,049 --> 00:08:28,929
Score.
215
00:08:28,926 --> 00:08:29,926
♪
216
00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:31,217
Oh, what about Eric, huh?
217
00:08:31,220 --> 00:08:33,220
He looks friendly.
Oh, yeah.
218
00:08:33,222 --> 00:08:35,182
I like his big tattoo that says "family."
219
00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:36,732
- Oh, I know this guy.
220
00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:39,135
We matched on a different app,
messaged for three months,
221
00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:40,314
and then never went on a date.
222
00:08:40,312 --> 00:08:41,982
- Yeah, come on.
Louise can do better than him.
223
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:44,320
But he met Henry Winkler.
224
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:47,360
- Oh! He's hot!
225
00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:48,901
Yes, yes, yes.
226
00:08:48,904 --> 00:08:50,824
Sailing, crypto, CEO?
227
00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:52,622
- What do you think?
- Eh...
228
00:08:52,616 --> 00:08:54,326
Sort of seems like
the Holy Trinity of jerks.
229
00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:55,326
What?
230
00:08:55,327 --> 00:08:57,407
No, he literally wrote,
"I'm a great guy.
231
00:08:57,412 --> 00:09:00,252
Fun, in-shape girls only."
I'm saying yes.
232
00:09:00,249 --> 00:09:02,669
- What?
- Oh, wait. What's on your profile?
233
00:09:02,668 --> 00:09:04,748
- Can I see your pics?
- Yeah, go ahead. Take a look.
234
00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:06,593
They're not, like, professional.
235
00:09:06,588 --> 00:09:09,418
Why does everyone have professional pics?
Yeah.
236
00:09:09,967 --> 00:09:13,257
JESSIE:
Yeah... Can I make a suggestion?
237
00:09:13,262 --> 00:09:16,722
I just don't see these attracting
the right kind of guy.
238
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,393
Oh.
239
00:09:18,392 --> 00:09:19,982
Uh...
240
00:09:19,977 --> 00:09:22,057
Okay, what was the suggestion?
241
00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:24,522
There we go. Elegant, in charge,
242
00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:26,153
professional. This is you.
243
00:09:26,149 --> 00:09:29,399
- Are you sure this is the look?
What do you guys think?
244
00:09:30,279 --> 00:09:32,609
- Gorge. Pure Louise.
- Yeah. Really nice. Fantastic.
245
00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:33,994
♪
246
00:09:33,991 --> 00:09:35,331
Okay!
247
00:09:35,325 --> 00:09:37,235
Smile for me.
248
00:09:38,787 --> 00:09:39,997
Think female governor.
249
00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:41,037
Okay.
250
00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:46,459
- I'd vote for that.
- Very nice, Louise.
251
00:09:46,461 --> 00:09:48,631
Incredible. Very smart.
252
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,469
You can read my mind.
I know you can.
253
00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:53,966
Angel!
254
00:09:53,969 --> 00:09:55,469
Ooh, how's it going?
255
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:56,930
This game is so hard.
256
00:09:56,930 --> 00:09:59,470
My visions really aren't helping me
figure out who the fake is.
257
00:09:59,474 --> 00:10:01,854
What about your new friend, Flonase?
258
00:10:01,852 --> 00:10:03,152
If you're making that joke,
259
00:10:03,145 --> 00:10:05,395
you obviously know her name is Allegra,
260
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:08,107
and she is the real deal.
She reads auras.
261
00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:09,528
Are you sure about that?
262
00:10:09,526 --> 00:10:10,686
- Mm-hmm. Ooh!
263
00:10:10,694 --> 00:10:12,914
Ooh! Ooh! That's the woman
who ignored me at the bar.
264
00:10:12,905 --> 00:10:14,315
Maybe it's her.
265
00:10:14,323 --> 00:10:15,703
Ooh. Go, go, go, go, go.
266
00:10:17,701 --> 00:10:19,201
Oh, so sorry.
267
00:10:20,329 --> 00:10:23,669
- If you touch my shawl again,
I will kill you.
268
00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:33,128
Okay, she's very legit.
269
00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:36,431
- No way he's six-one.
270
00:10:36,428 --> 00:10:38,638
-See you, Jonathan.
-Hate that hat.
271
00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:39,639
See you, Taylor.
272
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:41,390
JESSIE:
Oh, he needs a hat!
273
00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:42,351
See you, Thomas.
274
00:10:42,976 --> 00:10:44,226
AMY:
Oh no.
275
00:10:44,770 --> 00:10:46,310
LOUISE:
Uh-oh.
276
00:10:46,730 --> 00:10:48,860
- Mm...
- Oh. Oh dear.
277
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:51,443
- Oh, that obviously
wasn't supposed to happen.
278
00:10:52,653 --> 00:10:54,113
Would you like to explain?
279
00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:56,452
I mean, yeah. I'm not on here.
280
00:10:56,448 --> 00:10:58,738
I created a profile when we broke up.
281
00:10:58,742 --> 00:11:01,752
I went on this one horrible date
with this girl named Katharine,
282
00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,245
who's never tried ketchup.
283
00:11:03,247 --> 00:11:05,287
But, I deleted the app
284
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:07,130
when we got back together,
285
00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:09,745
so I have no idea why this is on here.
Mm, yeah.
286
00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:11,593
You got to delete your account,
287
00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:13,468
not just the app.
That's how they got you,
288
00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:14,465
so...
289
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,139
Ben, LA.
290
00:11:18,136 --> 00:11:20,306
"I'm just a guy
standing in front of a girl,
291
00:11:20,305 --> 00:11:23,675
asking her to DM him
her fave one-hit wonder."
292
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:25,354
I think we can, like, swipe left...
293
00:11:25,352 --> 00:11:28,652
- "Teachin', beachin', and tearing
it up in the keetchen."
294
00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:31,940
I've never felt more naked in my life.
295
00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:33,192
I'm gonna grab another drink.
296
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:35,363
- From the keetchen?
297
00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:37,322
LOUISE:
You know, in his defense,
298
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:39,782
rhyming's really big on here.
At least it's not as bad as
299
00:11:39,783 --> 00:11:41,743
"fluent in sarcasm."
300
00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,203
Oh. Okay, guys. Shh.
301
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:46,253
Couples therapy later.
We have got a match.
302
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:47,618
It's Nate!
303
00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:49,134
The CEO?
304
00:11:49,126 --> 00:11:51,586
- Oh my god! This is such a rush.
We have to message him.
305
00:11:51,587 --> 00:11:53,127
"Uh, hi.
306
00:11:53,130 --> 00:11:54,010
LOL."
307
00:11:54,006 --> 00:11:56,926
"I'm an entrepreneur
308
00:11:56,925 --> 00:11:58,545
in the wellness space."
309
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:01,012
Yeah, I'm just a yoga instructor.
310
00:12:01,013 --> 00:12:03,433
- I'm not trying to scam people.
- I'm just making sure you pop.
311
00:12:03,432 --> 00:12:04,812
This guy is, like, my ideal man.
312
00:12:04,808 --> 00:12:06,438
- Really?
313
00:12:08,854 --> 00:12:10,404
For Louise.
314
00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,570
- Really?
- Yep.
315
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,365
Better not be you.
316
00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:24,658
Is it?
317
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,461
- Excuse you.
I am a full-time psychic.
318
00:12:27,456 --> 00:12:29,706
- How do I know you're not the actor?
- I wish.
319
00:12:29,708 --> 00:12:32,708
Not being a psychic
would make my life a lot easier.
320
00:12:33,712 --> 00:12:36,632
I saw my parents' divorce
eight years before it happened.
321
00:12:36,632 --> 00:12:38,472
Oh, I'm sorry.
322
00:12:38,467 --> 00:12:41,087
That must have been really hard.
323
00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:44,100
- Hey, I am James.
I'm 34 years old,
324
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:47,637
and I'll be reading for the role
of Sexy Zombie Number Three.
325
00:12:47,643 --> 00:12:49,233
It is you!
326
00:12:49,228 --> 00:12:50,728
You are the actor!
327
00:12:50,729 --> 00:12:52,859
- Yes!
- Oh, come on.
328
00:12:52,856 --> 00:12:54,776
If I get found out, I don't get paid.
329
00:12:54,775 --> 00:12:55,605
Oh.
330
00:12:55,609 --> 00:12:57,109
- I-I knew it was you.
331
00:12:57,110 --> 00:12:58,610
You're the fake!
332
00:12:58,612 --> 00:12:59,822
What the hell, man?
333
00:12:59,821 --> 00:13:01,531
Yeah, she is the actor.
334
00:13:01,532 --> 00:13:02,912
I had a feeling.
335
00:13:02,908 --> 00:13:05,158
She doesn't even celebrate the solstice.
336
00:13:05,160 --> 00:13:07,160
- What? No, that...
337
00:13:07,162 --> 00:13:09,252
He is the actor.
338
00:13:09,248 --> 00:13:10,168
I just saw it!
339
00:13:10,165 --> 00:13:12,075
- You lied to me?
- No.
340
00:13:12,084 --> 00:13:13,504
I knew it.
341
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:15,302
I could tell she was
forcing it all night.
342
00:13:15,754 --> 00:13:17,174
She even said she was worried about
343
00:13:17,172 --> 00:13:20,302
"looking the part."
She's clearly not one of us.
344
00:13:22,761 --> 00:13:25,761
♪
345
00:13:37,192 --> 00:13:38,742
Ooh, Louise!
346
00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:41,855
You and Nate are having a real
back-and-forth going on over here.
347
00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:45,034
- "Is that a carp
you're holding in your photo?"
348
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,333
Oh, what's a carp?
349
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,907
Oh. Okay, I was hoping it wasn't a fish.
350
00:13:49,913 --> 00:13:51,963
- Uh, maybe you should tell him
about Louise's dog.
351
00:13:51,957 --> 00:13:55,207
- Maybe you should call Katharine
and go have some dry French fries.
352
00:13:55,210 --> 00:13:56,840
Oh! Nate lives
353
00:13:56,837 --> 00:13:59,627
two blocks away.
We have to invite him over, right?
354
00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:02,217
- We're gonna judge him
like American Idol.
355
00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:05,597
- Uh, yeah.
I can leave if you guys want...
356
00:14:05,596 --> 00:14:08,386
- No, no. What are you talking about?
We need you. You're the you.
357
00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:09,770
JESSIE:
Yeah!
358
00:14:14,313 --> 00:14:17,323
♪
359
00:14:21,820 --> 00:14:24,660
Hi! It's Jessie.
360
00:14:24,656 --> 00:14:25,736
You're on speaker with everyone.
361
00:14:25,741 --> 00:14:27,371
How is your psychic thing?
362
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:30,197
- Um... I-it ended early. I--
363
00:14:30,996 --> 00:14:33,076
Please tell me you guys are
doing something fun right now.
364
00:14:33,081 --> 00:14:35,881
- Well, I'm about to have
a first date in front of everybody.
365
00:14:35,876 --> 00:14:37,206
Yeah. Aren't you jealous?
366
00:14:37,211 --> 00:14:38,881
Come join us at Amy and Dave's.
367
00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:41,719
- Yeah, but no spoilers. We don't need
a psychic giving everything away.
368
00:14:41,715 --> 00:14:44,675
Yeah, don't ruin it for me.
I have a lot riding on this.
369
00:14:44,676 --> 00:14:46,216
Um, you know what?
370
00:14:46,220 --> 00:14:49,560
I actually just realized...
how tired I am,
371
00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:52,516
so, um, think I'm just going
to go straight to bed.
372
00:14:52,518 --> 00:14:54,978
I'm sorry. Hope he's the one.
373
00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:56,898
- Lame!
- Party pooper.
374
00:14:56,897 --> 00:14:59,477
Bye. Bye!
375
00:14:59,483 --> 00:15:01,533
♪
376
00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:10,289
- Hm...
- Ooh.
377
00:15:10,285 --> 00:15:11,785
Got it. "Weg."
378
00:15:11,787 --> 00:15:13,957
"Weg"? What's that? What's "weg"?
379
00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:16,496
- It is seven-point word.
- No, it-- No, it's not.
380
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:18,040
Just 'cause the numbers are on it.
381
00:15:18,043 --> 00:15:19,713
"Weg" is not a word.
You came!
382
00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:21,420
Maggie.
383
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:23,091
Oh, thank God you're safe.
384
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:24,800
Why didn't you text back?
385
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:28,425
Listen, I have been
worried sick about you.
386
00:15:28,428 --> 00:15:29,928
These cults, they brand people...
387
00:15:29,930 --> 00:15:31,770
Uh, honey,
388
00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,515
why don't you come
into the kitchen with me
389
00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:35,187
and help me find
my favorite mug?
390
00:15:35,185 --> 00:15:38,105
You know, the one that says,
"If you can read this, you're too close"?
391
00:15:38,105 --> 00:15:40,105
Please? Come on.
392
00:15:40,983 --> 00:15:42,613
MARIA:
Your mug can't wait?
393
00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:45,239
I have questions for our daughter!
394
00:15:45,237 --> 00:15:48,027
- Oh! He's here! You guys, he's here!
- Louise, go answer it!
395
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:49,531
It's not even my house!
396
00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:51,123
-Okay, yeah.
-Fluff the pillows.
397
00:15:51,118 --> 00:15:52,538
-Okay.
-Okay, okay.
398
00:15:52,536 --> 00:15:53,746
JESSIE:
Fluff the pillows.
399
00:15:53,745 --> 00:15:56,205
Karate chop, please.
Ben, settle down.
400
00:15:57,708 --> 00:15:58,878
-Hi!
-Hi!
401
00:15:58,876 --> 00:16:00,956
LOUISE:
Come in.
402
00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:03,091
Yep, you're in the right place.
403
00:16:03,088 --> 00:16:06,968
Uh, welcome to this... house.
404
00:16:07,593 --> 00:16:08,643
Nate. Ben.
405
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,385
- Hey, Ben.
Hey, everyone.
406
00:16:11,388 --> 00:16:13,098
-Hi.
- Hey.
407
00:16:13,098 --> 00:16:14,888
Uh, what is all this?
408
00:16:15,601 --> 00:16:17,271
- Oh, yeah. These are my--
409
00:16:17,269 --> 00:16:18,269
Siblings.
410
00:16:19,146 --> 00:16:20,976
- Uh, and we were
just in the middle of--
411
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:22,651
- Talking about how
we have the same mum.
412
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:24,479
- Yeah.
Uh, please!
413
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:27,074
Have a seat!
We have heard so much about you.
414
00:16:27,070 --> 00:16:29,200
- You have?
415
00:16:31,116 --> 00:16:34,156
I gotta say you really look
like your photos.
416
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:35,951
Like, exactly.
417
00:16:35,954 --> 00:16:37,164
- Oh.
Oh.
418
00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:40,214
Did you just take these photos?
419
00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:42,788
You know, I can't do this.
420
00:16:42,794 --> 00:16:43,804
Uh...
421
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:46,591
Nate? This is not a match.
422
00:16:46,590 --> 00:16:49,220
Um, Jesse, thanks for trying,
but it's a no.
423
00:16:49,218 --> 00:16:50,968
It's okay. We can keep looking.
424
00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:51,969
LOUISE:
No, don't. Alright?
425
00:16:51,970 --> 00:16:54,520
This was just not as fun
as I thought it was gonna be.
426
00:16:54,515 --> 00:16:56,135
Online dating never is.
427
00:16:56,141 --> 00:16:59,441
I'm sick of trying to impress people
that I've never even met.
428
00:16:59,436 --> 00:17:01,606
You know, it makes me feel
bad about myself,
429
00:17:01,605 --> 00:17:04,395
and hot people shouldn't
feel bad about themselves.
430
00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:05,859
- No...
- Nope. Nope.
431
00:17:05,859 --> 00:17:08,359
- I'm tired of trying
to force this, okay?
432
00:17:08,362 --> 00:17:10,992
I need a break,
so I'm deleting the apps.
433
00:17:10,989 --> 00:17:13,279
- Well, make sure you delete
the account as well,
434
00:17:13,283 --> 00:17:15,453
so your girlfriend doesn't get mad at you.
435
00:17:16,370 --> 00:17:19,120
- I still can't believe you online dated,
and I didn't.
436
00:17:19,122 --> 00:17:20,712
Like, what else don't I know?
437
00:17:20,707 --> 00:17:22,837
- What else don't I know?
I didn't know your type was a...
438
00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:24,880
business bro.
439
00:17:24,878 --> 00:17:25,798
Wait,
440
00:17:26,547 --> 00:17:27,547
was I talking to you?
441
00:17:27,548 --> 00:17:28,758
Yeah, that was me.
442
00:17:28,757 --> 00:17:29,927
And you two are together?
443
00:17:29,925 --> 00:17:31,295
Yeah, we are.
444
00:17:31,969 --> 00:17:33,299
NATE:
Huh.
445
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:36,519
- I'm gonna go.
- You should go now.
446
00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:38,887
-Thanks for coming by.
-Sure.
447
00:17:38,892 --> 00:17:42,062
- Oh, actually, do you have
a favorite Albert Finney movie?
448
00:17:42,062 --> 00:17:43,612
Who's Albert Finney?
449
00:17:43,605 --> 00:17:45,605
Yeah, you can go. Right this way.
450
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:50,565
- You're going to lose her if
you interrogate her like that.
451
00:17:50,571 --> 00:17:52,031
Don't scare her off.
452
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,619
No sudden movements.
453
00:17:54,616 --> 00:17:58,156
You got to approach
her cautiously, respectfully.
454
00:17:58,161 --> 00:17:59,541
Like she's a cat.
455
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:01,038
Oh, Jack.
456
00:18:01,039 --> 00:18:02,459
- Seriously?
- Here.
457
00:18:03,041 --> 00:18:04,541
Offer her a treat.
458
00:18:07,045 --> 00:18:08,085
Hm?
459
00:18:21,435 --> 00:18:22,935
You okay, sweetie?
460
00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:27,519
- Not really.
- Oh...
461
00:18:32,279 --> 00:18:36,029
- Sometimes, I feel like I just
don't really belong to a group,
462
00:18:36,033 --> 00:18:37,533
you know? Like...
463
00:18:38,994 --> 00:18:41,214
Like, I'm... I'm either too normal
464
00:18:41,205 --> 00:18:43,455
or not normal enough.
465
00:18:45,042 --> 00:18:46,252
It hurts.
466
00:18:46,251 --> 00:18:48,421
What about your friends downstairs?
467
00:18:48,420 --> 00:18:49,630
That's a little group.
468
00:18:49,630 --> 00:18:52,010
Louise, Ben, and Jessie...
469
00:18:52,007 --> 00:18:53,757
That other... couple.
470
00:18:53,759 --> 00:18:55,179
Yeah.
471
00:18:55,177 --> 00:18:56,967
I love them. They're great, but...
472
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:01,020
It's awkward with Ben.
473
00:19:01,642 --> 00:19:03,892
Before Ben and Jessie got back together,
474
00:19:03,894 --> 00:19:05,404
Ben and I...
475
00:19:06,021 --> 00:19:08,901
had a little thing for a minute, and...
476
00:19:09,733 --> 00:19:10,943
I really liked him.
477
00:19:14,238 --> 00:19:16,618
Maybe I still do.
478
00:19:18,742 --> 00:19:20,492
Listen, I cannot begin to know
479
00:19:20,494 --> 00:19:22,704
what it's like to move
through the world like you.
480
00:19:22,704 --> 00:19:23,914
♪
481
00:19:23,914 --> 00:19:26,794
What I do know is that there is one place
482
00:19:26,792 --> 00:19:29,292
where no one is normal
483
00:19:29,294 --> 00:19:30,674
and you fit right in.
484
00:19:33,966 --> 00:19:36,256
- You always know what I need, don't you?
- Mm.
485
00:19:36,260 --> 00:19:37,760
Maybe you are psychic.
486
00:19:41,932 --> 00:19:42,932
You want some more treats?
487
00:19:42,933 --> 00:19:44,433
- Yes, please.
- Mm.
488
00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:45,894
Jack!
489
00:19:45,894 --> 00:19:48,864
Do we still have that tin of popcorn
that we were gonna give the mailman,
490
00:19:48,856 --> 00:19:50,646
but never got around to it at Christmas?
491
00:19:50,649 --> 00:19:52,939
Two steps ahead of you, honey.
492
00:19:52,943 --> 00:19:54,613
I finished it off last week.
493
00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:57,111
- Dad...
Oh...
494
00:19:57,114 --> 00:20:00,124
♪
495
00:20:10,127 --> 00:20:11,707
I'm sorry, does that say "weg"?
496
00:20:11,712 --> 00:20:14,092
Yes, it's a word. Don't question it.
497
00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:17,431
♪
498
00:20:17,426 --> 00:20:19,716
- I'd love to show you
the tile in my foyer.
499
00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:21,140
Is it hand laid?
500
00:20:21,138 --> 00:20:24,268
- Of course, it is.
Shall we head out to my loft?
501
00:20:24,266 --> 00:20:25,636
Yes.
502
00:20:27,561 --> 00:20:31,481
- He's got a husband, and the tiles
are peel and stick.
503
00:20:35,152 --> 00:20:36,782
Excuse me.
504
00:20:37,529 --> 00:20:39,569
You are chic. I'm obsessed.
505
00:20:39,573 --> 00:20:41,493
We're getting a drink.
506
00:20:41,491 --> 00:20:43,951
- I know.
507
00:20:44,953 --> 00:20:47,963
♪
34031
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