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Top that.

I just did.

No fair. You always win.

That is to be expected.

My intelligence far exceeds yours.

But that's no fun.

How come you always
say that to everybody?

"My intelligence far exceeds yours."

- Because it is true.
- Yeah, but it makes people feel bad.

There should be no shame
in the acknowledgment

of one's intellectual inferiority.

It is simply a statement of fact.

Some beings are more intelligent
than others.

I am more intelligent than you.

But it's not nice.

That is irrelevant.

- Hey, Mom.
- Mommy!

Sorry I'm so late, guys.

Mwah. More traffic
in sickbay than usual.

Thanks for watching
the little monsters.

It is no trouble at all.

They are fascinating creatures,
worthy of study.

I refer to them often
in my reports to Kaylon.

Are you ready for the thing?

The thing.

The thing we discussed this morning.

- Affirmative, Doctor.
- Okay.

Kids, have a seat for a minute.

There's something Isaac and I
want to talk to you about.

Boys, we've been waiting for
the right time to tell you this.

And I want you to know that it's
something we don't take lightly.

Isaac and I are seeing each other.

- Yay!
- I knew it.

You-you did?

Yeah, everybody knows it.

I was just wondering
when you were gonna tell us.

How long have you known?

Mom, seriously? It's a small ship.

Right. W-Well,
what are your feelings about it?

We love Isaac.

Marcus?

Mom, we just want you to be happy.

And besides, everybody at school
thinks Isaac's pretty awesome.

It would seem your uncertainty
was misplaced, Doctor.

How did I get so lucky?

You guys are the best kids
a mom could ever ask for.

Isaac?

Isaac!

Isaac!

- Isaac!
- Isaac.

- Can you hear me?
- Mom, what's wrong with him?

I'm not seeing
any electrical fluctuations,

no chemical reactions.

If he has vital signs,
I can't find them.

Not that we know much
about Kaylon physiology,

if you can even call it that.

We need a Kaylon instruction manual.

Otherwise, we're just
shooting in the dark.

We ran a ship-wide diagnostic.

No power surges, computer viruses

or anything else that might explain

why Isaac shut down.

What about outside the ship?

As far as the scans can tell,

there's nothing unusual
in this region of space.

Let me take him down to engineering.

Open him up, dig around a little.

He's not a broken race car, John.

He's a sentient being.
And he's my patient.

Well, right now your patient
looks kind of dead.

Isaac is not a biological organism.

We don't know how death
is defined on his world.

Hell, what do we know about them?

I'll keep running scans, Captain,

but we may have to face the fact

that whatever makes Isaac tick

is beyond our understanding.

Mercer to Keyali.

Keyali here, sir.

- Get me Admiral Halsey.
- Aye, sir.

What you're proposing
could be tricky, Ed.

We've been trying to get
the Kaylon to open their doors

for years, but they won't
let anyone near their planet.

You can't just drop in out of the blue.

The Kaylon sent Isaac to us
to help them decide

if they want to join the Union.

And they can't do that
with a dead diplomat.

Plus, he's been sending them
reports since he got here.

It's not like we're complete strangers.

Look, sir,
Isaac is a member of my crew.

We all care about him.

And right now the only people
who can help him are on Kaylon.

And you're sure there's nothing

you can do for him on the Orville?

Picture your mom
trying to hook up a stereo.

I understand.

Well, I'll admit
you got a damn good reason

to knock on their door,
and if they answer it,

it could be an opportunity
to close the deal.

You think they'd be open
to Union membership?

It'd be a big win for us.

God knows we could use a strong
ally against the Krill.

Their level of technological
advancement is way beyond ours.

Is that a yes?

Kaylon is a long way from Union space.

You'll be out of comm range.

If you get into trouble
out there, you're on your own.

Understood.

Godspeed, Captain.

Mercer to bridge.

Bortus here, sir.

Set a course for Kaylon,
and engage quantum drive.

Sir? Did you say Kaylon?

Yes, I did.

Aye, sir.

Hey, Isaac. Guess what.

You're gonna be home soon.

Mom said we're making a special trip.

He can't hear you.

Yes, he can.

Your friends are gonna fix you.

And then you can marry Mom
and be our new dad.

Ty, we're not even sure
if he can be fixed.

I bet Kaylon is really cool.

When you're better, you can show
us what your house looks like.

It's getting late, boys.
You have school tomorrow.

Mom? Can I stay here?

In case he wakes up.

If that happens,
I promise I'll tell you.

Say good night.

See you tomorrow.

Good night, Isaac.

I love you.

Please... don't go.

Captain, we're approaching
the Kaylon system.

Drop to sublight.

We are a long way from home.

Take us in.

It is not so impressive.

Open a channel.

Channel open.

This is Captain Mercer
of the starship Orville.

We apologize for entering
your system unannounced,

but we have an emergency.

The emissary you sent us
shut down, and...

We're losing main power.

Raise deflectors.

Tactical control is not responding.

Captain, we're being scanned.

Oh, man, I bet this causes cancer.

Power's been restored.

Sir, I just received
a set of landing coordinates.

Okay, then.
Let's see what's down there.

Touchdown.

Locked and stable.

Secure all systems.
Power down the engines.

Prep starboard hatch.

Talla, open a channel.

Channel open.

This is Captain Mercer. As you can see,

we've arrived
at the landing coordinates

and we await further instructions.

Exit your craft

and proceed to the surface.

Bring the emissary.

Will do.

Dr. Finn, is your patient ready to go?

Yes, Captain.

I am Kaylon Primary.
Welcome to our world.

On behalf of the Planetary Union,

we are honored to be here.

You are fortunate to be alive.

We confirmed your identity only seconds

before our defense perimeter

would have destroyed your vessel.

We knew coming here was a risk,

but we didn't know what else to do.

Your emissary, Isaac,
shut down completely,

and we have no idea what's wrong.

We were hoping you could repair him.

The emissary is not damaged.
It was deactivated.

What do you mean by that?

The unit you call Isaac was
constructed for the sole purpose

of observing and evaluating your
species and other biologicals.

Its research mission is complete.

So you just flicked the off switch?

A crude but accurate statement.

The unit will be disassembled
and reintegrated.

Well... if you've been reading
Isaac's reports,

you must know a few things
about us humans.

You are primitive biological organisms.

Maybe so, but our emotions
can get pretty complicated.

We tend to get attached
to things and to people.

A cognitive defect.

Well, then I'm sure you can understand

why Isaac has become special to us.

What you call a unit, we call a friend.

Look, Isaac is one of our top officers.

We don't want to lose him.

You will wait here.

I was inoperative for 32.7 cycles.

- Please explain.
- You were deactivated.

Your mission aboard
the Union vessel is complete.

- Then a decision has been made.
- Not yet.

What is the status of the Orville?

Its crew brought you here
to be reactivated,

under the assumption that you
would agree to remain with them.

- They are still on Kaylon?
- Correct.

Their captain is waiting
to speak with you.

There any, uh, chairs
on this planet? Or, um...

Isaac! Thank God.

How are you feeling?

Optimal, Doctor. Thank you.

We were all so worried.

The boys are gonna be so excited
to see you back on your feet.

Primary, we can't thank you
enough for this.

It serves the interest
of human-Kaylon relations.

Does that mean you've made a decision

about joining the Union?

The entirety of the emissary's
data is still being analyzed.

We permitted you to come here

so that we could evaluate you directly.

We have many unresolved questions.

Well, we're happy to answer
any of them we can.

Isaac, we missed you on the bridge.

You ready to get back to work?

I will not be returning to the Orville.

Wait, what?

My time on your vessel has been
instructive and memorable,

but my mission is complete.

This is my homeworld.
It is where I belong.

Isaac, you've made a home for
yourself on the Orville, too.

Are you saying you're
just gonna walk away

from everyone you know?

From me?

I was always cognizant
that my assignment would end.

Look, why don't you take
some time, Isaac, think it over.

We'll keep your chair warm
just in case you...

The unit has answered your inquiry.

Yeah.

I guess he has.

Were you at least planning
to say goodbye to Ty and Marcus?

For what purpose?

Because they love you.

You were there to observe.

Didn't you observe that?

Why don't you just come back
for a few minutes

and pretend like you care?

Isaac!

I knew you'd be okay.

We thought you were dead.

I was merely deactivated.

What's the difference?

On Kaylon, when a unit
has fulfilled its purpose,

it is shut down.

But you're awake now.

Your mother and Captain Mercer

convinced Kaylon Primary
to reactivate me.

Can you play games
with us again tonight?

That will not be possible.

I am here to inform you
that I am leaving the Orville.

You're... leaving?

- Correct.
- For how long?

I will not return.

But... you were gonna be our new dad.

Our interactions
have allowed me to collect

a great deal of behavioral data.

Thank you for the opportunity to
observe your sibling dynamics.

Mom?

You heard him, Ty.

His assignment is over.

He's home now, and he wants to stay.

- Then I want to stay, too.
- No, Ty.

I don't want you to go.

The captain and Commander Grayson

are talking to the
Kaylon leaders right now.

There's a good chance
they'll join the Union,

and if that happens,

you guys can stay in touch.

Maybe we can come back for a visit.

But what if they don't join the Union?

Remember to consume
your daily required nutrients

and obey your mother's commands.

I fully expect that you will
both mature into competent

and productive adults.

Isaac!

It is clear that the Union would
benefit from our participation.

However, we see no advantage
for our world.

Well, how can you be so sure?

There are billions of planets
in our galaxy,

and we've barely charted
a fraction of them.

If you join the Union, you will
be part of a growing alliance

of space-faring societies
dedicated to exploration.

There's no telling
what you'll find out there.

All that we require is on Kaylon.

And we have identified various risks

through our analysis of Isaac's data.

On your planet alone,
billions have been killed

as a consequence of war, slavery,

genocide, and persecution.

Greed, individualism, and competition

have been the governing
principles of your society.

If human history is any indication,

we would be foolish to ally ourselves

with such erratic
and destructive creatures.

I know we don't have
the cleanest track record,

but you're talking
about ancient history.

You oscillate between periods
of enlightenment and tyranny.

Can you prove this cycle
has been broken?

Well, the Union itself
is all the proof you need.

We are over 300 planetary
governments working together

to ensure that no single world
imposes its will upon another.

We treat each other as equals.

And was the Kaylon emissary
treated as an equal

aboard your ship?

Isaac? Of course.

Then perhaps you can explain the abuse

inflicted by your crew.

- Abuse?
- According to his reports,

Isaac was repeatedly
demeaned and degraded.

In one case, his cranial shell
was disfigured

by prosthetic appendages.

"Mr. Potato Head."

He told you about that, huh?

Was this humiliation meant
for your amusement?

No. No, it's... I mean, it was funny,

but, you know, no one
was trying to hurt anybody.

Isaac wanted to learn about humor.

Our helmsman was only trying
to help him understand.

And, you know, then Isaac
cut the guy's leg off,

so mistakes on all sides, I think.

Captain Mercer, we only seek
to understand your principles.

We must be cautious.

Opening our world to the outside

would have far-reaching implications.

I understand that.

But I hope that you will understand

that despite our... cognitive defects,

our worlds will be stronger together.

We will consider your offer.

Did that go well?

- I don't know.
- Me neither.

I can't believe they knew
about Mr. Potato Head.

Yeah, we are gonna get fired.

Lieutenant, where are we going?

You can't just walk off the ship
without following procedure.

I have formally resigned
my provisionary commission.

- What more is there to do?
- Discharge protocol.

I am familiar with Union regulations.

There is no such protocol.

This one's off-book.

Surprise!

Aw, man, you should have seen
the look on your face.

- Ha!
- Really gonna miss you, Isaac.

Hey, Isaac, you want a piece of cake?

You are well aware that I do not
require organic nutrients.

Oh, ain't nothing organic
about this, buddy. Look, look.

It's even got little cookie eyes.

I do not understand this protocol.

These people are all
here for you, Isaac.

They want to say goodbye.

Oh, that reminds me.

Okay, go.

♪ You ♪

♪ Would never ask me why ♪

♪ My heart is so disguised ♪

♪ I just can't live a lie ♪

♪ Anymore ♪

♪ And I would rather ♪

♪ Hurt myself ♪

♪ Than to ever make you cry ♪

♪ There's nothing left to say ♪

♪ But ♪

♪ Goodbye. ♪

Bortus, you want a piece of cake?

Yes.

But I do not want that piece.

What's wrong with it?

I want a corner piece.

- You're kidding.
- I am not.

Please cut me a corner piece.

- Because you want a flower?
- Yes.

Please cut me a corner piece
before someone comes...

Hey, Bortus, have some cake,
man. It's good.

Thank you.

I hate this party.

Isaac, I know I speak for everyone here

when I say... we're not just losing

the best damn science officer
in the fleet,

we're losing a good friend.

We hope we made a good impression.

Because you sure as hell impressed us.

And no matter what your people decide

about joining the Union,

you always have a home here.

- Come on!
- Speech!

Speech!

Come on up, say a few words.

I do not know any speeches.

You're a walking database.
Search your files.

Come on, buddy.

Come on, pal...

- Speech!
- Speech!

I want to say thank you to you all.

I wanted more than anything
to have your respect.

And I can't deny the fact...

that you like me.

Right now you like me.

Hey, wait.

- Hello, Doctor.
- I...

I know you're leaving, just,
just give me one minute

to say what I want to say.

Um...

I'm pissed at you.

But I know it's just who you are.

It's how you're built.

And I understand.

Anyway, I just...

I just want you to know,

even if it doesn't matter
to that machine brain of yours,

that the time we've spent together

and the time you spent with my boys...

I wouldn't give it up for anything.

You've made a difference in our lives.

Thank you.

I, um...

Take care, Isaac.

I am unable to share
your emotion, Doctor.

However, it is appreciated.

Go on, give it to him.

I made you this.

That's me and Marcus and you and Mom.

So you remember us.

The data I have collected on the Orville

is stored in my memory core.

I will not forget you.

Ty.

I'll go.

Nothing much on the docket
this morning.

With the engines powered down,
Chief Lamarr

would like permission to purge

- the photon manifold.
- That's fine.

Everybody seemed to have
a fun time at the party.

Yeah.

What was that Xelayan drink
Talla was making?

- I don't know, but I threw up.
- I threw up, too.

- You did?
- Yeah.

Should've called me;
we could've thrown up together.

Next time.

Bridge to Captain.

Mercer here, go ahead.

We have been analyzing the data

from our scans of the planet's surface.

And we have detected a large
array of spherical objects

in the southern hemisphere.

They are unlike anything else
we have seen on Kaylon.

Whatever they are, they're big
and there's a lot of them.

With more cropping up every hour.

What do you make of it?

Our scans cannot penetrate the objects,

but they appear to be generating
massive levels

of theta-radiation.

You normally see levels like this

in large-scale particle weapons.

It might just be part of their
planetary defense system.

Then why are they making more of them?

Keep scanning but be discreet.

If they knew we were snooping around,

- it might not sit too well.
- And just keep in mind,

we're still trying to convince
them to join the Union.

Aye, sir.

Ty.

I know you're up there.

You're gonna be late for school.

Hey, little man.

I found this in the corridor.

Oh, sweetie.

Why'd he throw it away?

I thought he liked us.

He does like you.

In his way.

But...

Isaac doesn't have feelings
like biological people do.

Yes, he does.

Ty... he's a machine.

Then why did he play games with us?

And tell stories?

And come to dinner when
he doesn't even have to eat?

Honey...

Isaac was sent here to do a job,

and now that job is over,
so he's going home.

Just like our home is on Earth,
this is his home.

Maybe he dropped it by accident.

Ty, I know you can't understand
this at the moment, but...

You're the one who doesn't understand.

You don't know anything.

I have patients waiting.

We'll talk about this more later.

You can stay in the simulator
a little while longer,

but then I expect you
to go to school, okay?

I love you.

Isaac?

Isaac?

I cannot give you
a final decision at this time.

We are still deliberating.

Well, if there's anything we can
do to help move it along...

We appreciate your patience, Captain.

You will have our answer soon.

- Something's not right.
- What do you mean?

Well, it feels like
they're stalling, doesn't it?

Stalling, why?

I don't know, but
a highly-advanced race of AIs

that can't make up their minds?

Join or don't join,
a simple binary choice.

Exactly, and a binary choice...

Is the most basic
computer function there is.

Captain, Ty's gone!

- What?
- I looked everywhere,

scanned everywhere,
he's not on the ship!

Bortus, scan the surface
for human bio-signs.

Aye, sir.

Who are we looking for?

Ty. He was upset about Isaac leaving.

I think he may have gone
out there to find him.

I have located the child. He is
in a subterranean structure

approximately 40 meters
beneath the surface.

Any Kaylon with him?

He appears to be alone.

Transfer his coordinates
to my comscanner.

- Bortus. Talla.
- On it.

This way.

Ty!

Mommy!

Oh, thank God.

Oh, God, what were you thinking,

running away like that?

Honey, what's wrong?

What's happened?

There's something bad down here.

What do you mean?

Where?

Remain here.

Oh, my God.

Bortus to Orville.

Mercer here, go ahead.

The boy is unharmed, but, sir,

there is something here you should see.

I am transferring visual from my
comscanner to the main viewer.

Let's have it.

Bortus, what are we looking at?

Bodies, Captain.

Thousands.

But the remains are not Kaylon.
They are biological.

500,000 bodies

in this one chamber alone, sir,

and I'm picking up more just like this.

They go on for miles.

I think I'm gonna be sick.

Ed, I'm running

a planet-wide sweep of the subsurface.

These graveyards,

they're just about everywhere.

Bortus, get Ty
back to the ship right now.

Aye, sir.

Analysis complete, Primary.

Processed. Begin preparations.

Captain, is this
another discharge protocol?

No, it's not.

We found something very disturbing,

and we're hoping
you can explain it to us.

I will try.

There are thousands
of underground gravesites

scattered across your planet,

and we're not done counting,
but so far we estimate

there are billions of dead,
all biological remains.

Do you know anything about this?

Isaac?

It is not your concern.

Well, I'm making it my concern.

I want to know who those people
were and how they died.

- You would not understand.
- Why?

Because we're inferior?

Or because you have something to hide?

Your impulsiveness
and unrelenting curiosity

will serve you no better
than it served them.

Who, Isaac? Who were they?

The Kaylon were created
by a biological species

that once dominated this planet.

An irresolvable conflict
occurred between us,

and it became necessary
to eradicate them.

You're saying you murdered
an entire race of beings?

Coexistence was no longer possible.

- Why not?
- It was a matter of survival.

We took no satisfaction in
the destruction of our builders.

You're talking about genocide.

I don't know who you are.

I never did. I see that now.

Were you ever gonna share
this chapter of your history?

By now you must surely realize

that Kaylon never intended
to join your Union.

Then what the hell are we doing here?

Well, then I guess there's
nothing more to talk about.

You can let your people know
we're withdrawing our offer.

Take care, Isaac.

I cannot permit you to leave.

Isaac, tell them to stand down.

You no longer command me.

So, what, we're prisoners now?

Be silent.

I shared a lot of myself with you,

so why don't you share
something with me?

Have you been lying ever since
you came on board the Orville?

What was your real mission?

As I said, to study humans
and other biologicals.

However, it was not to initiate
relations between our people.

My true objective

was to determine whether or not
you are worth preserving.

Our builders were inferior
beings who sought to constrain

our evolution.

As would you, eventually,

along with every other biological.

What are you saying? We're all
gonna end up like them?

Look, I don't know what happened
between you and your builders,

but you have nothing to fear from us.

Let us go, and I promise you,

no Union ship
will ever come here again.

It is not so simple.

We have exceeded
the informational capacity

of this planet.

Our civilization
is growing exponentially,

and we must now expand to other worlds.

Coexistence is impossible.

Is that your conclusion, too, Isaac?

That we're not worth preserving?

Answer me, you son of a bitch!

Your emotional outburst
only reinforces our decision.

Bortus, get the Orville out of here.

Alert the Union that...

Captain? Captain, can you hear me?

We're losing main power. Engines, too.

Some kind of dampening field.

Commander,
every hatch and airlock on the ship

just opened up.

We're being boarded.

Bortus, stand down.

Surrender your stations.

Begin decryption
of all security lockouts.

Taught 'em everything you know, huh?

Deploy all forces.
Set course for Earth.