All language subtitles for Gilmore.Girls.S01E03.WEBRip.x264-FGT

MIRA DOES MAKE
A PERFECT CASSOULET.

WHO'S MIRA?

OUR COOK.

I THOUGHT THE COOK
WAS HEIDI.

WE LET HEIDI GO MONTHS AGO.

SHE HAD A PROBLEM
CLOSING THINGS --

THE DOOR,
THE REFRIGERATOR...

THE LIQUOR BOTTLE.

THEN IT WAS TRINA,

I LIKED SOPHIA.
THEN SOPHIA.

I DIDN'T?
YOU DID NOT.

SHE WAS THE ONE WHO SANG.

THAT'S RIGHT --
TERRIBLE WOMAN.

AND AFTER SOPHIA,
WE HAD ANTON.

THAT'S RIGHT. ANTON WAS
THE ONE THAT I LIKED.

I'M SORRY, DAD.

HOW DO YOU MIX UP
ANTON AND SOPHIA?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

ONE IS A MAN,
AND ONE IS A WOMAN.

AND YOUR POINT BEING?

THAT ONE IS A MAN
AND ONE IS A WOMAN.

I HAVE A LOT TO DO
IN A DAY, LORELAI.

I DON'T HAVE TIME TO KEEP UP
WITH THE MULTITUDES OF PEOPLE
YOUR MOTHER EMPLOYS.

BUT ONE IS A MAN,
AND ONE IS A WOMAN.

[ SIGHS ]

THE DINNER
WAS SO WONDERFUL, MIRA.

IT'S SARAH.

OH, I'M SORRY.

MOM, HER NAME IS SARAH.

I THOUGHT SHE SAID MIRA.

UGH!

HEY, GRANDMA,
THESE PLATES ARE REALLY PRETTY.

THANK YOU. THEY WERE YOUR
GREAT-GRANDMOTHER'S.

LORELAI, THE FIRST.

I THOUGHT MOM WAS THE FIRST.

NOT IN THE NAME.

BUT IN MANY OTHER THINGS,
I WAS A TRAILBLAZER.

JUST FINISHING
YOUR THOUGHT, MOM.

LORELAI THE FIRST
WAS MY MOTHER.

SHE WAS AN EXTREMELY
ACCOMPLISHED EQUESTRIAN,

A DISTINGUISHED PATRON
OF THE ARTS,

AND SHE WAS ALSO WORLD-FAMOUS
FOR HER MASQUERADE BALLS.

SHE WAS QUITE A WOMAN.

YES, SHE WAS.
MIRA, CUT THE CAKE!

YES, AND WHY DON'T YOU BRING
SARAH OUT HERE WITH YOU?

* FEELING LONELY, AND SO COLD *

* ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS CALL MY NAME *

* AND I'LL BE THERE
ON THE NEXT TRAIN *

* WHERE YOU LEAD,
I WILL FOLLOW *

* ANYWHERE THAT YOU TELL ME TO *

* IF YOU NEED *
* IF YOU NEED *

* YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU *

* I WILL FOLLOW *

* WHERE YOU LEAD *

* I WILL FOLLOW *

* ANYWHERE *
* ANYWHERE *

* THAT YOU TELL ME TO *

* IF YOU NEED *
* IF YOU NEED *

* YOU NEED ME TO BE WITH YOU *

* I WILL FOLLOW
WHERE YOU LEAD.. *

SO, LORELAI, HOW ARE THINGS

AT THAT CHARMING
LITTLE INN OF YOURS?

THEY'RE STILL CHARMING
AND LITTLE.

WE'RE CROSSING OUR FINGERS

IT DOESN'T BECOME RUDE
AND LARGE.

MOM'S HAVING A HUGE WEDDING
THERE THIS WEEK.

REALLY?
YEAH.

THERE'S PEOPLE COMING
FROM ALL OVER THE COUNTRY.

WELL, ISN'T THAT NICE?

YEAH.
RORY, HOW'S CHILTON?

DONE WITH ME NOW.

I'M SORRY.
WAS THERE MORE?

UH, RORY HAS TO PICK
A TEAM SPORT TO PLAY.

IT'S A REQUIREMENT.

PHYSICAL FITNESS IS AS IMPORTANT
AS INTELLECTUAL FITNESS.

SO SAYS PLATO, AND SO SAY I.

WHAT SPORT
ARE YOU GOING TO PICK?

I'M NOT SURE.

I'M NOT REALLY
THE ATHLETIC TYPE.

I TOLD HER
GO FOR THE DEBATING TEAM.

THAT'S NOT A SPORT.

IT IS,
THE WAY GILMORES PLAY.

WHAT ARE YOUR CHOICES?

GOD, THERE'S, LIKE,
A THOUSAND OF THEM --

BASKETBALL, LACROSSE, SWIMMING,
TRACK, GOLF.

GOLF?
YEAH.

WELL, YOUR GRANDFATHER
IS A GOLF PLAYER.
OOPS.

HE PLAYS EVERY WEEK AT THE CLUB.

HE'D TEACH YOU
TO PLAY LIKE A PRO.

EMILY...
HE COULD TAKE YOU SUNDAY.

IT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN TEACH
IN AN AFTERNOON.

THAT'S OKAY.
RORY CAN PICK SOMETHING ELSE.

WHY SHOULD SHE PICK
SOMETHING ELSE?

SHE NEEDS TO LEARN A SPORT, AND
RICHARD CAN TEACH HER A SPORT.

YOU CAN USE YOUR MOTHER'S
OLD GOLF CLUBS.

THEY'RE GATHERING DUST ALONG
WITH THE REST OF HER POTENTIAL.

OKAY. MOM, COULD I MAYBE TALK
TO YOU FOR A MINUTE?

WE'RE HAVING DESSERT.

I'D LIKE TO TALK TO YOU

BEFORE THE SUGAR SETS IN
AND MAKES ME CRAZY.

YOU ARE THE ODDEST PERSON.

Yeah -- too easy.

WHAT IS SO IMPORTANT
THAT IT CAN'T WAIT FOR CAKE?

KEEP MOVIN'.

I CAN'T GO FURTHER, UNLESS
YOU'D LIKE ME TO BORE MY WAY
THROUGH THE WALL.

DON'T DO THIS, MOM.
DO WHAT?

FORCE RORY AND DAD
TO GO GOLFING.

I'M NOT FORCING ANYBODY.

YOU'RE MANIPULATING
THE SITUATION IN A WAY

THAT GIVES NO ONE
A WAY OUT. THAT'S FORCE.

I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP
YOUR DAUGHTER.

SHE'LL FIND ANOTHER SPORT.
WHY SHOULD SHE?

SHE DOESN'T WANT
TO GO, DAD DOESN'T
WANT TO TAKE HER.

YOUR FATHER DOESN'T KNOW
WHAT HE WANTS.

JUST LET IT GO -- PLEASE.

WELL, ISN'T THIS INTERESTING?
YOU'RE AFRAID.

OF WHAT?

THAT RORY
WILL ENJOY THE CLUB

AND HAVE A GOOD TIME
WITHOUT YOU.

THAT'S CRAZY.
I AGREE.

I'M NOT AFRAID.
THEN LET HER GO.

SHE WON'T ENJOY IT, MOM.

WHY DON'T WE JUST LET
RORY DECIDE?

RORY IS THE SWEETEST KID
AND SHE WON'T TELL YOU THAT
SHE DOESN'T WANT TO GO

BECAUSE SHE'S AFRAID
OF HURTING YOUR FEELINGS.

YOU COULD GIVE HER SOME COACHING
TO GET OVER THAT.

I'M NOT TRYING TO HURT
YOUR FEELINGS.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU.

OF COURSE IT'S ABOUT ME.

IF RORY GOES AND HAS
A GOOD TIME WITHOUT YOU,

THEN I WIN.

OKAY, BOB BARKER.

LISTEN, RORY KNOCKS HERSELF OUT
ALL WEEK AT CHILTON.

THE WEEKENDS ARE THE ONLY TIME
SHE HAS TO UNWIND AND HAVE FUN.

WITH YOU.
I'M THERE.

SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT --

THERE'S NO WAY THAT RORY
COULD POSSIBLY ENJOY

A WEEKEND DAY
WITH HER GRANDFATHER.

YOU'RE JUST GONNA TWIST IT
ALL AROUND.

YOU KNOW YOUR DAUGHTER
SO WELL,

YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO ASK
HER OPINION.

SHE'D BE MISERABLE,
AND YOU KNOW IT.

I'M SETTING MYSELF UP HERE,

BUT YES,
SHE WOULD BE MISERABLE.

THAT SOUNDS A LITTLE
CONTROLLING TO ME.

YEAH, I WALKED RIGHT INTO THAT.

INTERESTING, ISN'T IT --

YOU BEING THE ONE
WHO'S CONTROLLING?

I AM NOT BEING --
ACCORDING TO YOU,

I WAS THE ONE IN THE FAMILY
WITH THAT GIFT.

I NEVER SAID --
WE'RE MORE ALIKE
THAN YOU THOUGHT, AREN'T WE?

YOU WIN.

THANK YOU.

[ SIGHS ]

MAN, DID YOU GET BLINDSIDED?
I'M SO SORRY.
THAT'S OKAY.

I TRIED TO STOP IT --
I SWEAR.
I KNOW.

MAYBE IT WON'T BE THAT BAD.
MAYBE I'LL LIKE IT.

MAYBE YOU WILL.
MAYBE YOU
COULD COME WITH ME.

IS THERE A "YOU'RE CRAZY" TEAM?
BECAUSE I THINK THEY'D
MAKE YOU CAPTAIN.

RORY, I LOVE YOU.
I'D TAKE A BULLET FOR YOU.

I'D RATHER STICK SOMETHING IN MY
EAR THAN GO TO THE CLUB.

FINE.
I'D RATHER SLIDE DOWN
A BANISTER OF BLADES AND

LAND IN A POOL OF ALCOHOL
THAN GO TO THE CLUB WITH YOU.

I'M ON A ROLL.

I'D RATHER EAT MY HAND
THAN GO CLUBBING WITH YOU.

I'D RATHER GET MY FACE
SURGICALLY ALTERED

TO LOOK LIKE THAT RICH LADY
WITH THE LION HEAD

THAN GO TO THE CLUB
WITH YOU.

SHOULD I DRIVE
SO YOU CAN CONTINUE?

WOULD YOU? THANKS.

I'D RATHER CUT OFF MY HEAD,
USE IT AS A PUNCH BOWL

THAN GO TO THE CLUB
WITH YOU.

AND YOU'LL WALK DOWN HERE
OVER THE BRIDGE

WITH THE SWANS FLOATING BY
AND THE MUSIC PLAYING.

WHAT ARE THEY DOING
WITH THOSE PURPLE FLOWERS?

DECORATING THE BRIDGE.

I DIDN'T WANT PURPLE FLOWERS --
I WANTED PINK.

AND I WANTED BLUE.

I THOUGHT VIOLET
WOULD BE A NICE COMPROMISE.

WE PAID FOR PINK FLOWERS.

AND BLUE FLOWERS.

YOU DID NOT PAY FOR ANYTHING.

I TOLD HER TO DECORATE
WITH VIOLET FLOWERS.

IT'S VERY NICE OF HER
TO TRY TO TAKE THE HEAT FOR ME.

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT,
BUY YOUR OWN FLOWERS.

YES. I THOUGHT SO.

NOW, GO AWAY.
MY ADVIL IS WEARING OFF.

THEIR FATHER SPOILED THEM.

OH, THEY'RE JUST EXCITED.

THEY'RE SPOILED...

AND THEY WON'T MOVE AWAY.

WHAT IF IT RAINS?
WE'LL PUT UP TENTS.

WHAT IF IT'S TOO WINDY?
WE'LL SECURE EVERYTHING

AND PUT EXTRA HAIR SPRAY
IN EVERYBODY'S HAIR.

TOO HOT?

WE'LL USE FANS
THAT WON'T CAUSE DAMAGE,

BECAUSE THE THINGS
HAVE BEEN SECURED

AND THE HAIR
HAS BEEN SPRAYED.

SO...I HAVE NOTHING
TO WORRY ABOUT?

NOPE.

OH, THERE MUST BE
SOMETHING.

LISTEN, I HAVE EVERYTHING
UNDER CONTROL.

GO HAVE A FABULOUS BUBBLE BATH,
AND I'LL SEND UP SOME WINE

AND A MASSEUSE WHO BEARS
A REMARKABLE RESEMBLANCE

TO ANTONIO BANDERAS.

HOW REMARKABLE?

GET READY TO APPLAUD.

THIS IS MY FAVORITE PLACE
IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

[ UPBEAT MUSIC ]

COULD YOU SEND RORY UP TO ROOM
12 IN ABOUT 20 MINUTES? THANKS.

SO, ANY PROBLEMS?

[ French accent ]
WITH THE WEDDING OR MY LIFE?

I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT --
IT'S NOT YOUR LIFE!

DO YOU STAGE THESE EVENTS
TO TORTURE ME?
YES.

JOB WELL DONE.

OKAY. LET'S START AGAIN.
ANY PROBLEMS?

GUESTS ARE CHECKED IN,
BASKETS ARE GIVEN OUT,

AND 200,000 TONS
OF JORDAN ALMONDS

HAVE BEEN DELIVERED.

OKAY, GOOD.
DID RORY CALL?
NO.

HMM. SHE'S GOLFING ALL DAY
WITH MY FATHER,

AND I'M HALF-EXPECTING THIS BIG
"SAVE ME" CALL TO COME IN --

YOU DON'T CARE AT ALL.

TO ME YOU ARE THE TEACHER
IN A CHARLIE BROWN CARTOON.

HAVE THE GROOMS ARRIVED?
THEIR PLANE WAS SUPPOSED
TO GET IN AT 7:30.

I'M SURPRISED
THEY'RE NOT HERE BY NOW.
MAYBE THEY MADE A RUN FOR IT.

OOH, SOMEBODY GOT STOOD UP
AT THE PROM.

OH...DEAR.

WHAT?

Wow!

ARE THOSE --

No. It would be too...

SCHMOOPIES!

HA HA HA!

Weird.

YOU KEPT THIS FROM ME
ON PURPOSE.

It's like a really snooty
Doublemint commercial.

JUST LET ME KNOW WHEN
THE MIDGETS AND CLOWNS ARRIVE.

OH, NO -- NO, NO.

YOU HAVE TO GET THEM
ALL SETTLED IN.

I'M NOT TALKING TO THEM.
YES, YOU ARE.

WELL, I'M NOT TALKING
TO THEM NICELY.

IT'S AFTER 8:00.
SHE SHOULD BE HERE ALREADY.

SHE'LL BE HERE.

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO TEE OFF
AT YOUR DESIGNATED TIME.

YOU PAY GOOD MONEY
TO THAT PLACE.

YOU'LL TEE OFF
WHEN YOU TEE OFF.

IS THAT
WHAT YOU'RE WEARING?

YES.
HMM.

WHAT'S WRONG
WITH WHAT I'M WEARING?!

NOTHING. IT'S FINE.

THIS IS ABSURD!

SHE'S YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER.

SHE'S A 16-YEAR-OLD
WHO WOULD RATHER BE AT THE MALL.

SHOW HER ALL AROUND THE CLUB --
ESPECIALLY THE ROSE GARDEN.

I AM NOT A GUIDE.

TAKE HER TO LUNCH,
AND HAVE HER GET DESSERT.

NO ONE SAID ANYTHING
ABOUT LUNCH.

I HOPE LORELAI'S CLUBS
ARE STILL GOOD.

EMILY, YOU ARE NOT LISTENING
TO ME.

I WILL TEACH HER TO GOLF,
AS PROMISED BY YOU,

BUT LUNCH
IS OUT OF THE QUESTION.

YOU HAVE TO EAT,
SO YOU'LL EAT TOGETHER.

DO YOU HAVE SUNSCREEN?

EMILY...

[ DOOR BELL RINGS]
SHE'S HERE.

OH. 8:30. WE MUST REMEMBER
TO BUY HER A WATCH.

RICHARD, SO HELP ME GOD,
YOU WILL BE SWEET

AND MAKE THIS
A MEMORABLE DAY FOR HER.

THIS IS THE FIRST TIME WE'VE
SHOWN OUR GRANDDAUGHTER
OFF AT THE CLUB,

AND IT MEANS A GREAT DEAL
TO MY HAPPINESS -- AND YOURS --

THAT THIS DAY GO WELL.

ARE WE CLEAR?

RORY! HELLO!

SORRY I'M LATE.

NONSENSE.
YOU'RE RIGHT ON TIME.

HI, GRANDPA.
RORY, NICE TO SEE YOU.

THIS IS A PERFECT DAY
FOR GOLFING, ISN'T IT?

IT'S COOLER AT 8:00.
AM I DRESSED OKAY?

I DIDN'T HAVE ANY
OF THOSE SHORT PANT THINGS.

ACTUALLY,
THERE IS SOMETHING MISSING.

OH, WAIT A MINUTE.

HERE WE GO.

NOW YOU LOOK
JUST LIKE TIGER WOODS.

WOW! THAT'S SOME HAT.

OKAY, OFF YOU GO, YOU TWO.
HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME.

WE WILL.

YOU BET.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

IS IT HARD
TO BECOME A MEMBER HERE?

EVERYONE HAS TO GO THROUGH
A THOROUGH SCREENING PROCESS.

KIND OF LIKE THE FBI?

WE'RE MUCH MORE THOROUGH
THAN THAT.

WOW!
YES.

DO YOU KNOW THE MERGER
OF FORSCAPE AND D.S.S.

HAPPENED RIGHT HERE
ON THIS LAWN?

REALLY?

INTERNATIONAL FINANCE
WILL NEVER BE THE SAME,

ALL BECAUSE OF
A LOST GOLFING BET.

THAT'S CRAZY.

THAT'S HIGH FINANCE.

WELL, HERE WE ARE.

NOW...

WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT GOLF?

THAT IT'S A GOOD WALK
SPOILED?

WELL, YOUR DRIVER IS THE MOST
POWERFUL CLUB IN YOUR BAG,

AND AS SUCH, IT CAN BE
YOUR MOST VALUABLE ASSET

OR YOUR GREATEST LIABILITY.

TO WIELD IT PROPERLY
REQUIRES A PRECISE COMBINATION

OF CONFIDENCE AND HUMILITY.

CONFIDENCE AND HUMILITY --
GOT IT.

THERE YOU ARE. THAT'S A PRETTY
GOOD NATURAL GRIP.

NOW LINE THE TOE
OF YOUR LEFT FOOT

UP WITH THE BALL.
THAT'S RIGHT.

NOW DROP THIS SHOULDER
A LITTLE BIT.

NOW, KEEPING YOUR LEFT ARM FIRM,
DRAW THE CLUB BACK,

AND SWING IT CLEANLY
THROUGH THE BALL.

I'M BETTING THAT WAS WRONG.

THERE ARE NO RIGHTS AND WRONGS
TO THE LEARNING PROCESS.

TRY THAT AGAIN.

I'M BETTING THAT WAS WRONG.

THESE ARE BLUEBERRIES.

I THINK I ORDERED
STRAWBERRIES.

I DID. I WROTE IT DOWN.
I GOT A COPY.

SOOKIE, LISTEN --
"MUSHROOMS, MELON,
ENDIVE, PEACHES, KIWI."

EXCUSE ME. CRAZY LADY...

I SHOULD MAKE
KIWI ICE CREAM --

SOOKIE!
WHAT?

I KNOW YOU ORDERED STRAWBERRIES,
BUT THEY WEREN'T ANY GOOD.

SO INSTEAD OF SELLING YOU
SUBSTANDARD STRAWBERRIES,

I BROUGHT YOU BLUEBERRIES.

I'VE GOTTA MAKE STRAWBERRY
SHORTCAKE FOR 200 PEOPLE,

SO I THINK I'M GONNA NEED
STRAWBERRIES.

USE THE BLUEBERRIES.
TO MAKE WHAT?

BLUEBERRY SHORTCAKE.
THERE'S NO SUCH THING.

THE WORLD WAS FLAT
UNTIL SOMEONE TOOK A BOAT TRIP.

CAN I SEE THESE STRAWBERRIES?
NO.

JUST ONE?
NO.

HOW ABOUT A POLAROID?

COFFEE, COFFEE, COFFEE.

OOH, SOOKIE, CAN I TAKE SOME
OF THIS CAKE HOME TO RORY?

SHE'S GONNA NEED
A SPECIAL TREAT TONIGHT.

SHE IS SPENDING THE ENTIRE DAY
WITH MY FATHER

GOLFING AT THE CLUB.

NO.

TAKE THE BLUEBERRIES!
NO!

THE WHOLE THING WAS MASTERMINDED
BY MY MOTHER.

ONE MINUTE WE'RE HAVING
AN EXCRUCIATING FAMILY DINNER,

AND THE NEXT MINUTE
SHE'S MANIPULATED MY KID

INTO SPENDING HER SUNDAY
WITH MY FATHER

AT THE COUNTRY CLUB.

I CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT
ANYMORE.

IT'S MAKING ME TOO UPSET.
TELL ME SOMETHING HAPPY.

[ Voice breaking ] I CAN'T MAKE
THE STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE.

YOU SUCK AT THIS GAME.

THE BATTLE FOR SOUP VERSUS SALAD
IS RAGING IN THE OTHER ROOM.

COME QUICK AND SETTLE IT,
I'M RUNNING OUT OF

FRENCH CURSE WORDS THAT
THEY WON'T UNDERSTAND.

SALAD... SOUP...

...BEFORE
A TRADITIONAL MEAL...

...WHY ARE YOU MAKING
SUCH A SCENE, JESSICA?

IT'S BEEN 45 MINUTES
OF "SOUP OR SALAD?" --

SOUP OR SALAD --
I CAN'T DO IT ANYMORE.

I'M GOING TO GO FAR AWAY
AND NEVER COME BACK.

HOW ABOUT IF GUESTS GET A CHOICE
OF SOUP OR SALAD?

WE ARE DANCING...
NO. IT'S GONNA BE COLD...

THAT -- THAT -- WILL WORK.

...JESSICA, YOU ALWAYS GET
WHAT YOU WANT...

CHOICE OF SOUP OR SALAD.
GOT IT.

SO WEIRD.
WHICH ONE IS WHICH?

I THINK THE ONE ON
THE RIGHT IS MATT.

NO, THE ONE ON THE RIGHT
IS MARK.

THAT'S IMPRESSIVE.

I'M VERY GOOD
AT OBSERVING PEOPLE --

LEARNING THEIR TICS AND TRAITS,
THE SOUND OF THEIR VOICES.

THAT ONE HAS A POST-IT
ON HIS BACK.

THEN THAT'S MARK.
THE ONE ON THE RIGHT IS MATT.

TAKE THAT OFF OF HIM.
I WON'T.

WE CAN CALL EVERYONE "SWEETIE"
AND GET AWAY WITH IT.

GO WITH ME HERE, BUT LET'S SAY
MARK WALKS INTO A HOTEL ROOM

AND HE SEES HIS WIFE NAKED,
BUT IT'S NOT HIS WIFE,
IT'S HIS NAKED SISTER-IN-LAW,

AND HE HAS SEX WITH HER.

WOULD THAT BE CHEATING?

MY HEAD HURTS.

I THINK NO.

REALLY? LUCKY.

IF YOU ASK ME,
THIS UNION BELONGS ON
A PUBLIC-ACCESS STATION.

IT'S AGAINST THE LAWS
OF NATURE

AND JUST THIS SHORT
OF COMPLETELY OBSCENE.

WELL, YOU WON'T BE GIVING
THE WEDDING TOAST.

HOW'D EVERYTHING WORK OUT?

DO YOU HAVE CHILDREN?

A DAUGHTER.

DO YOU HATE HER?

NO.
NOT EVER?

UH, WELL, I WASN'T WILDLY
FOND OF HER DURING LABOR.

THAT WAS THE HIGH POINT
FOR ME.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

Rory: I CAN'T BELIEVE
I HIT THE BALL.

Richard:
IT'S QUITE IMPRESSIVE.

IT LANDED IN THE WATER.

YES, BUT THE SPLASH
WAS QUITE IMPRESSIVE.

THIS PLACE IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

I COULD SEE JUST COMING HERE
TO THINK OR READ,

THAT DEFEATS THE PURPOSE OF THE
HOLES WITH THE FLAGS IN THEM.

THERE IS SOMETHING RATHER SERENE
ABOUT WALKING AROUND HERE.

DO YOU COME HERE EVERY WEEK?

NO. WHEN I CAN.
I'M OFTEN WORKING
ON THE WEEKENDS.

BUMMER.
ISN'T IT?

HI, RICHARD.
HELLO.

CAN I ASK YOU A QUESTION?

GO AHEAD.

WHAT DO YOU DO?

I'M THE EXECUTIVE
VICE-PRESIDENT

OF THE GEHRMAN-DRISCOLL
INSURANCE CORPORATION.

WOW!
YES.

AND AS
EXECUTIVE VICE-PRESIDENT,

WHAT DO YOU DO?

WELL, IT'S
A VERY BIG COMPANY --

ONE OF THE LARGEST
IN THE UNITED STATES.

I HAVE A MYRIAD OF DUTIES

WHICH WOULD BORE YOU GREATLY
TO HEAR ABOUT.

OH. OKAY.

I OVERSEE
OUR INTERNATIONAL DIVISION.

THAT SOUNDS IMPORTANT.

WELL, IT RATES
A PARKING SPOT.

DO YOU GET TO TRAVEL A LOT?

QUITE A BIT.
LUCKY.

I SUSPECT YOU HAVE A YEN
FOR TRAVEL.

I'M UP TO MY EARS IN YENS.

ANY PARTICULAR PLACE
YOU'D LIKE TO GO?

HUNDREDS OF PLACES --
PARIS, ROME, LONDON, PRAGUE,

ISTANBUL, FEZ --
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO FEZ?

I CAN'T SAY THAT I HAVE.

I WANT TO GO TO FEZ.

I THINK TRAVELING
FOR A YOUNG GIRL

IS A VERY IMPORTANT THING.

YOUR MOTHER NEVER GOT
A CHANCE TO TRAVEL MUCH.

I KNOW. SHE TALKS ABOUT
THAT ALL THE TIME.

SHE DOES?

WE'VE GOT A DEAL. WHEN I
GRADUATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL,

WE'RE GONNA GO BACKPACKING
THROUGH EUROPE TOGETHER --

YOU KNOW,
DO THE WHOLE HOSTEL THING.

I JUST HOPE
IT REALLY HAPPENS.

WELL, WE'LL JUST HAVE TO
MAKE SURE THAT IT DOES.

RICHARD!

GLORIA!

YOU LOOK WONDERFUL.

AREN'T YOU SWEET?
IS EMILY HERE?

NO. I'M TAKING MY GRANDDAUGHTER
FOR A ROUND OF GOLF.

WELL, WE MUST GET TOGETHER.

ABSOLUTELY.

THE MOST ODIOUS WOMAN ALIVE.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

NOW, UM...

WE'LL MEET BACK HERE
IN 40 MINUTES?

OKAY.

AND THEN, IF YOU LIKE,
WE CAN GET SOME LUNCH.

THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

FINE.
COOL.

YES.

AND I'M TELLING HIM,

"I'VE BEEN COMING HERE
FOR 20 YEARS, MY YOUNG FRIEND,

"AND FOR 20 YEARS THAT CART,
NUMBER 43,

HAS BEEN MY GOLF CART."

HE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT.

EVERYBODY KNOWS IT.
DID HE GIVE YOU THE CART?

DAMN RIGHT
HE GAVE ME THAT CART.

YOU SHOULD HAVE NEVER
HAD TO ASK,

BECAUSE HE
SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT.

HELLO, GENTLEMEN.

RICHARD, GOOD TO SEE YOU.

I HEARD ABOUT
YOUR GOLF CART -- TOO BAD.

WELL, I'M STILL ANGRY
ABOUT IT.

RICHARD,
WHO WAS THAT YOUNG LADY

I SAW YOU
ON THE GOLF COURSE WITH?

THAT IS MY GRANDDAUGHTER.

SHE'S LOVELY.

LORELAI'S GIRL.

MY GRANDDAUGHTER LOOKS LIKE SHE
JUST FELL OFF A POTATO TRUCK.

[ CHUCKLES ]

MY GRANDDAUGHTER
WOULD NEVER BE CAUGHT HERE.

IT MIGHT GET IN THE WAY
OF THE TATTOO PARLOR

OR GETTING SOMETHING PIERCED

OR DOING WHATEVER SHE DOES

WHILE SHE RUNS WILD
THROUGH THE STREETS

LIKE A RABID DOG.

CUT HER OFF!
THAT'LL GET HER ATTENTION!

I CAN HELP YOU
WITH THE LITIGATION.

ACTUALLY,
RORY JUST STARTED CHILTON.
REALLY?

DAMN FINE SCHOOL.

SHE WANTED TO LEARN GOLF.

I THINK SHE'S TAKEN TO IT
QUITE WELL.

YEAH, JUST AS LONG
AS SHE'S NOT TAKEN

WITH A CERTAIN GOLF CART.

I'M WRITING A LETTER
TO THE BOARD.

I WISH YOU WOULD.

[ CLAMORING ]

LAST CHRISTMAS, HE BOUGHT THEM
THE SAME BRACELET.

SHE SHOULD HAVE JUST SHOT HIM
LIKE HIS FIRST WIFE DID.

I LOVE JANIE.
IS SHE OUT YET?

NANNETTE, PEG...

GLORIA, HI. GOOD GAME?

NOT BAD. YOU?

I JUST CAME FOR THE STEAM.

WE MUST GET TOGETHER AND
PLAY SOMETIME SOON.

NEXT WEEK?
I'LL CALL YOU.

The most odious woman alive.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

OKAY. I NEED MORE TULLE HERE.

I NEED THE FEELING
OF A MAJOR TUTU, OKAY?

OOH. UH, HEY, GARY,

THE RIBBONS GO ON THE CHAIRS,

NOT ON THE TREES.

OH! GREAT.

HEY.

WHERE DO YOU WANT
THE SWANS?

WELL, DO YOU KNOW
WHERE THE POND IS?

NOPE.

YOU KNOW THAT LITTLE ROAD
YOU CAME UP?

NOPE.

DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SAY
"BIG HELP" IN CHINESE?

MICHEL!

THIS IS 20 SWANS?

SURE. WHY NOT?

YOU SCREECHED?

SHOW THIS GUY
WHERE TO PUT THE SWANS.
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

I CAN'T LEAVE. I'VE GOT
A TULLE FESTIVAL OUT HERE.

I WILL NEVER GO NEAR
THOSE FILTHY BIRDS.

WHY?
I HATE THE SWANS.

THESE PARTICULAR SWANS?
NO, ALL SWANS.

I WAS ATTACKED BY
A BAND OF SWANS

IN THE LUXEMBOURG GARDENS
WHEN I WAS A BOY.

NO ONE FORGETS THAT.
OH, NO --

NOT BEING ATTACKED
BY A BAND OF SWANS.

WAS IT AN ALL-BOY BAND --

KIND OF A SCARY, FEATHERY,
'NSYNC KIND OF FIASCO?

THIS IS NOT FUNNY.

NO. I'M SORRY.

[ SWAN HONKS ]

[ GASPS ]
OH, MY GOD.

[ Laughing ] YOU HAVE TO ADMIT
THAT'S A LITTLEFUNNY.

PEPE le PEW,
GIVE ME A HAND WITH THIS.

NO.

LISTEN,
IT'S DRELLA OR THE SWANS.

SO EITHER ONE BEAST OF TERROR
OR ANOTHER?

Drella: WHAT'S
HE BABBLING ABOUT?
DON'T.

HE'S AFRAID OF SWANS.
THANK YOU.

OF COURSE HE IS.
HE'S FRENCH.

OKAY, I'LL TAKE YOU
TO THE POND.

THANK YOU.

BUT STAY FAR AWAY FROM ME.

CAN'T STAND THE TALK --
LOVE TO WATCH THE WALK.

SHE CAUGHT HIM IN THE POOL HOUSE
WITH THE TENNIS PRO.

NOT THE RIDING INSTRUCTOR.
I HAD NO IDEA.

THAT COMMITTEE IS NOT LOOKING
AT PEOPLE AS MUCH AS YOU THINK.

WHY WOULD THEY? FROM WHAT
YOU'VE TOLD ME,

THEY'RE INVOLVED IN ONE
NEFARIOUS ACTIVITY AFTER
ANOTHER.

IT'S A CONSPIRACY.

IT'S "PEYTON PLACE."
IS THERE MORE?

CAN YOU HANDLE IT?

I'LL STEEL MYSELF.

OKAY. MR. NEVILLE
LIKES ALL THINGS FRILLY.

GOOD GOD. HE'S MY BROKER.

I DON'T THINK ONE
WILL AFFECT THE OTHER.

MIND IF WE BARGE IN?

WELL, LOOK WHO'S HERE.

AH, RORY, THIS IS JULIAN JOHNSON
AND EDWARD JAMES.

CALL ME "ED."

YOU CAN CALL ME "ED," TOO.

IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU.
WOULD YOU CARE
TO JOIN US?

IF RORY DOESN'T MIND US
INTRUDING I HER TIME
WITH HER GRANDFATHER.

NO, THAT'S FINE.

AH, GREAT.

SO, WE HEAR
YOU'RE ATTENDING CHILTON.

I JUST STARTED.

THAT'S A HARD SCHOOL.
YES, SIR

RORY IS
AN EXCELLENT STUDENT --
REALLY?

4.0 GRADE-POINT AVERAGE.

WHOA! THAT'S GOT ME BEAT!

HA HA HA! HA HA HA!

SHE'S GOING TO FEZ SOMEDAY.

FEZ?

WHAT THE HELL IS IN FEZ?

THAT'S FOR HER TO FIND OUT.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

INTERESTING HAT.

I WENT GOLFING
WITH MY GRANDFATHER TODAY.

DID YOU KNOW GOLF COURSES
ARE AN ENVIRONMENTAL BLIGHT

BECAUSE OF THE CHEMICALS THEY
USE TO KEEP THE GRASS GREEN?

ACTUALLY, I DID.

BAD JOKE. SORRY.

OH...

MY GOD -- THIS DAY --
THE SWANS, THE TULLE, MY HEAD.

LUKE, I NEED THE LARGEST
CHEESEBURGER IN THE WORLD.

LET'S BREAK A RECORD, MISTER.

SO THE WEDDING IS A NIGHTMARE.

WE GOT THESE 10 BOXES
OF CREEPY LARVAE

THAT ARE SUPPOSED TO SWARM
INTO BUTTERFLIES

ON THE WEDDING DAY.
THEY SWARMED EARLY.

WHAT'S WITH THE HAT?

GRANDMA GAVE IT TO ME.
OH, NOW, THAT'S JUST MEAN.

IT'S NOT THAT BAD.

DO YOU WANT A MIRROR?
I'M TAKING IT OFF.

SO, RORY'S GOLFING ADVENTURE --
TELL ME!

IT WAS FINE.

I BROUGHT YOU CHOCOLATE CAKE
TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.

IT REALLY WASN'T THAT BAD.

YOU ARE THE SWEETEST KID
IN THE WORLD. WHERE DID
YOU GET THAT FROM?

LUKE, AM I MISTAKEN, OR DID
THE SIGN ON THE DOOR SAY "OPEN"?

SO, WHERE WERE WE?
ME GOLFING.

RIGHT. GO.

OKAY. WELL, UM,
BY THE END OF THE DAY

I COULD EVEN HIT THE BALL.

SOMETIMES IT WASN'T MY BALL,
BUT THE INTENTIONS WERE GOOD.

WELL, GOOD INTENTIONS AND NO
PHYSICAL EXERTION WHATSOEVER

IS WHAT THE GAME OF GOLF WAS
BUILT ON. SO, DID YOU ORDER?

I'M NOT HUNGRY.
I HAD A BIG LUNCH
AT THE CLUB.

WITH ALL THE OTHER DEVASTATORS
OF OUR LAND.

LUKE, I'M REALLY SORRY.
I DIDN'T KNOW.

YOU HAD A BIG LUNCH
AT THE CLUB?

YEP. IT WAS QUITE GOOD.

WHAT'S WITH THE "QUITE"?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

YOU DON'T EVER SAY "QUITE."

I'VE SAID "QUITE"
PLENTY OF TIMES.

WHATEVER. SO, BESIDES
THE "QUITE GOOD" LUNCH YOU HAD,

WHAT ELSE HAPPENED?

NOTHING. WE PLAYED.
I MET HIS FRIENDS.

I TOOK A STEAM.
YOU TOOK A STEAM?

YEAH. I SWEATED OUT
ALL MY TOXINS,

AND I STOLE A TOWEL.

WOW! SOUNDS LIKE YOU
REALLY HAD A GOOD TIME.

I DID.
REALLY?

REALLY.
REALLY?

REALLY.
REALLY?

OKAY -- NEW WORD.

SORRY. I'M SURPRISED.

I THOUGHT YOU
WERE GONNA BE BORED.

I WAS KIND OF SURPRISED, TOO.

I DON'T KNOW. IT WAS PRETTY.
GRANDPA AND I TALKED A LOT.

YOU TALKED? REALLY?

YOU'RE DOING IT AGAIN.

SORRY. YOU TALKED?

WE TALKED ABOUT FEZ.
AND HE THOUGHT IT WAS A HAT.

I TOLD HIM ABOUT OUR TRIP, AND
HE THOUGHT IT WAS A GREAT IDEA.

WOW!

SO YOU REALLY HAD FUN?

YEAH.

THAT'S GREAT.

THAT IS REALLY,
REALLY GREAT.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE STARVING.

THINGS CHANGE. MOVE ON.

DOES THIS HAT
REALLY LOOK BAD ON ME?

NO. I THINK IT LOOKS
KINDA CUTE.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY.
FEEL EACH OTHER.

USE THE THUMPING OF YOUR HEART
AS YOUR METRONOME.

LET PASSION
BE YOUR CHOREOGRAPHER.

BE AS LIGHT ON YOUR TOES
AS YOU ARE IN YOUR HEART.

NO, NO, LET ME SHOW YOU
HOW IT'S DONE.

AGAIN?

YOU KNOW,
IN SOME COUNTRIES,

IF YOU DANCE THIS CLOSE,
YOU'RE CHEATING ON YOUR WIFE.

YOU'RE NEXT.
TAKE YOUR TIME.

CAN YOU CHECK
WITH THE CATERERS?

OKAY.

[ TELEPHONE RINGING ]

HEY.

OH, MY GOD, YOU HAVE
GOOD HANDWRITING.
THANK YOU.

YOU DID NOT GET THAT
FROM ME.

YOUR FABULOUS FLAIR,
YOU GOT FROM ME.

I ALSO GOT MY DEVIATED
SEPTUM FROM YOU.

HEY, FOCUS ON THE FLAIR.

IT'S FOR YOU.
HE SAYS HE'S YOUR FATHER,

THOUGH WHY HE'D VOLUNTEER
THAT FREELY, I DON'T KNOW.

MY FATHER? ARE YOU SURE?

PLEASE JUST TAKE THE PHONE.
THANK YOU.

DAD?

YEAH, IT'S LORELAI.
WHO ELSE CALLS YOU "DAD"?

YEAH, SHE'S RIGHT HERE.
HOLD ON.

IT'S FOR YOU.

THANKS.

HELLO?

HEY, GRANDPA.

THAT'S GREAT.

JACKIE WANTS SAMUEL BARBER,
JOHN CAGE, AND PHILIP GLASS,

AND JESSICA WANTS SHANIA TWAIN'S
"I FEEL LIKE A WOMAN."

I'M NOT A JUKEBOX.
OH, PLEASE.

YOU THINK I STARTED
PLAYING THE HARP

BECAUSE I THOUGHT
IT WOULD MAKE ME COOL --

FINALLY GET ME IN
WITH THE IN-CROWD?

MAYBE I'D MAKE FOR SOME GREAT
HAPPY-HOUR CONVERSATION.

NO, ALRIGHT?
THE MUSIC DRIVES ME, LADY.

I WILL PLAY WHAT I FEEL,
AND YOU WILL LOVE IT.

I'LL GIVE YOU AN EXTRA $100.

YOU JUST GOT YOURSELF
A JUKEBOX.

YEAH, YEAH,
I'D LOVE TO SEE IT.

NO, IF YOU WANT TO.

SURE. THAT SOUNDS GOOD. YEAH.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

SHOULD I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE?

I THINK I WANT TO CHANGE
MY HAIR.

REALLY? I THINK IT LOOKS
QUITE GOOD.

YOU'RE FUNNY.

DO YOU WANT SOMETHING
TO DRINK?

OH, YEAH -- WATER.

SO YOU TALKED
TO GRANDPA TODAY?

WHAT?

GRANDPA -- HE CALLED?

YEP!
ANYTHING WRONG?

NO. HE JUST FOUND THIS BOOK
WE WERE TALKING ABOUT.

OH!

AND HE JUST CALLED
TO TELL YOU?

YEAH. WHY?

NOTHING. IT'S JUST WEIRD.

HE DOESN'T CALL
THE INN THAT MUCH --

OR EVER, ACTUALLY.

HE KNEW THAT I
WAS LOOKING FOR IT, SO --

OH, SURE.
WHAT BOOK IS IT?

MENCKEN'S "CHRESTOMATHY."

OH, THAT ONE.
YEAH.

HEY!

CINNAMON IS STUCK
UNDER OUR FRONT PORCH AGAIN.

CAN I BORROW SOME VEGETABLE OIL
AND A SHOEHORN?

I'LL GET IT.

I'M CALLIN' HIM AND CALLIN' HIM,
AND I GO AROUND THE PORCH,

AND THIS BIG, ORANGE TUSH
IS JUST STARIN' ME IN THE FACE.

I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS.

YEAH. HE MUST HAVE BEEN MEOWING
FOR AN HOUR,

BUT MOREY WAS PLAYING SOME
THELONIOUS ON THE STEINWAY,

AND WHEN MOREY PLAYS,
I GO INTO THIS TRANCE

WHERE ALL I CAN SEE IS BLUE
AND MOON AND STARS.

[ MEOWS ]

Morey: HE'S OUT, BABS!

OH. NEVER MIND, SUGAR.

PLAY ME HOME, BABY!

[ PLAYING PIANO ]

[ GIGGLES ]

BYE.

[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]

OH, GOD! IT'S KILLIN' ME!

BABETTE DIDN'T TAKE HER OIL.

AH, KEEP IT.
CHRISTMAS IS EARLY THIS YEAR.

SO YOU KNOW
WHAT I WAS THINKING?

MADONNA AND SEAN PENN
SHOULD GET REMARRIED?
BESIDES THAT.

I WAS THINKING YOUR GOLFING
EXPEDITION SHOULD TOTALLY
COUNT AS A DINNER.

I THINK I CAN GET US OUT OF
DINNER AT THE GRANDPARENTS'
ON FRIDAY.

MAYBE WE COULD GRAB A MOVIE.

OH. WELL, THAT'S OKAY.

IT'S NO BIG DEAL, REALLY.

NO. IT'S JUST GONNA GET GRANDMA
ALL FREAKED OUT.

I CAN HANDLE THOSE FREAK OUTS.
I'VE DONE THAT.

I HAVE TO GET THE BOOK
FROM GRANDPA ANYWAY.

LET'S JUST GO.

OH. ALRIGHT,
IF YOU REALLY WANT TO.

I DO.

OKAY. FINE.

IS THAT MY SWEATER?
WHAT?

YOU'RE WEARING MY SWEATER.

SO?

NO, IT'S OKAY.

IT'S JUST I THOUGHT I ASKED YOU
TO AT LEAST ASK

BEFORE YOU BORROW MY STUFF.

I'M SORRY.
IT'S OKAY.

IT'S JUST NOT TOO MUCH
FOR A SIMPLE "CAN I
BORROW IT, MOM," IS IT?

NO, IT'S NOT.
JEEZ. LIGHTEN UP.

IT'S MY FAVORITE SWEATER,
TOO.

SINCE WHEN?
SINCE ALWAYS.

THIS IS NOT
YOUR FAVORITE.

YES, IT IS, AND IT'S GOING
TO BE STRETCHED OUT,

LIKE EVERYTHING YOU BORROW.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

YOU TAKE MY SWEATERS

AND WEAR THEM
AND STRETCH THEM OUT.

I COULDN'T POSSIBLY STRETCH
THEM OUT!

YOUR BOOBS ARE WAY BIGGER
THAN MINE!

THAT IS NOT TRUE.
YES, IT IS.

YOUR BOOBS ARE TOTALLY BIGGER
THAN MINE!

YOU'RE CRAZY!

DO YOU WANT TO MEASURE?
WHAT?

I'M SERIOUS. GET THE
MEASURING TAPE RIGHT NOW!

I AM NOT GOING TO MEASURE
MY BOOBS!

BECAUSE YOU KNOW THAT
YOU ARE TOTALLY BIGGER!

I'M GOING INSIDE.

FINE.
WE'LL JUST COMPARE BRAS.

STOP IT!
I'LL STOP IT WHEN YOU QUIT
STEALING MY STUFF!

YOU'RE CRACKED!

YOU'RE...BIGGER!

[ SIGHS ]

"YOUR BOOBS ARE BIGGER
THAN MINE?"

I'M A MENTAL CASE.

SO, APOLOGIZE.

I WAS TOO STUPID
TO APOLOGIZE LAST NIGHT,

AND SHE WAS GONE
BEFORE I GOT UP THIS MORNING.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
YOU'RE VERY POSSESSIVE
OF YOUR SWEATERS.

IF SOMEBODY EVEN BREATHES
TOO HARD ON MY PARING KNIFE,

I'M LIKE
A CRAZY SPIDER MONKEY.

IT'S NOT ABOUT THE SWEATER.

IT'S ABOUT THE GOLFING THING
AND THE LIKING IT THING.

SHE HAD FUN, SOOKIE,

JUST LIKE MY MOTHER
SAID SHE WOULD.

YEAH, THAT'S GOTTA HURT.
SHE SHOULD HAVE FUN.

I WANT HER TO HAVE
A GOOD RELATIONSHIP
WITH HER GRANDPARENTS.

JUST BECAUSE I DON'T
DOESN'T MEAN SHE SHOULDN'T.

RIGHT?
RIGHT.

RIGHT. SO WHY WAS I TRYING
TO GET HER OUT OF DINNER?

WHAT AM I TRYING TO DO,
UNDERMINE THEIR RELATIONSHIP?

YOU WEREN'T.
YES, I WAS.

YES, YOU WERE.
I'M 4-YEARS-OLD.

YOU'RE JEALOUS.
I'M NOT JEALOUS.

YOU'RE JEALOUS BECAUSE
THEY LIKE RORY BETTER THAN YOU.

OH, THANK YOU FOR THE HUG.

SEE, I'M BAD AT ADVICE TALKS.

CAN WE TALK ABOUT SOUP?
I'M GOOD WITH SOUP.

I'M SORRY. YOU'RE FINE.
I'M ALL MIXED UP.

I LEFT THAT LIFE, YOU KNOW --
THE CLUB AND MY PARENTS.

I RAN FROM IT
AS SOON AS I COULD.

IT JUST NEVER OCCURRED TO ME
THAT SHE MIGHT WANT IT.

IT OCCURRED TO MY MOTHER,
THOUGH.

GOD, I HATE
THAT SHE WAS RIGHT.

YOU DON'T KNOW THAT SH--
OOH! OH, MY GOD.

OHH! AAH!

ARE YOU OKAY?

OKAY.

LOOK AT YOU!
YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL!

[ SIGHS ]

I HAVE TO BE MORE ADULT
ABOUT THIS.

I MEAN, IF THE COUNTRY CLUB LIFE
IS WHAT SHE WANTS,

MORE POWER TO HER, RIGHT?

YOU KNOW, LITTLE WHITE GLOVES
AND COMING-OUT PARTIES --

THAT MAKES SOME GIRLS
HAPPY, RIGHT?

SURE. YEAH -- IF THEY'RE
ON PROZAC, ABSOLUTELY.

I JUST NEVER THOUGHT
I RAISED THAT KIND OF KID --

NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG
WITH THAT KIND OF KID.

I JUST DIDN'T THINK
THAT WAS RORY.

MAYBE IT'S NOT. I DON'T KNOW.
AM I OBSESSING? SOOKIE? HELLO?

DO I HAVE TO PUT ON
MY STRAWBERRY COSTUME
TO GET YOUR ATTENTION?

I'M SORRY.
YOU HAVE A STRAWBERRY COSTUME?

UNBELIEVABLE!

JACKSON...

SO THIS
IS WHAT WE'VE COME TO --

YOU SNEAKING AROUND
BEHIND MY BACK,

BUYING SOMEBODY ELSE'S
STRAWBERRIES?

I WAS DESPERATE!

YOU DISGUST ME!

I NEEDED THE STRAWBERRIES!

WELL, NOW YOU HAVE 'EM!
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY TOGETHER!

JACKSON, WAIT!

NO!

COME ON, JACKSON!

NO!

WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT.
NO.

GET BACK!

[ INDISTINCT ]

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

* ...A KISS TO BUILD
A DREAM ON *

* MY IMAGINATION
WILL FEED MY HUNGRY HEART *

* LEAVE ME ONE THING
BEFORE WE PART *

* A KISS TO BUILD
A DREAM ON *

* WHEN I'M ALONE *

* WITH MY FANCIES *

* I'LL BE WITH YOU *

* LEAVING ALL MY ROMANCES *

* MAKING BELIEVE
THAT THAT'S TRUE *

* OH, GIVE ME YOUR
LIPS FOR JUST A MOMENT *

* MY IMAGINATION -- **

OH, PARDON ME.

HERE YOU ARE.

WE DID IT.

WE SURE DID.

OH, GOD, I FEEL WONDERFUL!

I'M SO GLAD IT TURNED OUT
THE WAY YOU WANTED IT TO.

YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
THEY JUST TOLD ME

THEY'RE GOING TO SHARE
A CONDO IN TUCSON, ARIZONA.

THAT'S HUNDREDS OF MILES
AWAY!

CONGRATULATIONS.

THANK YOU!
SISTER SLEDGE!

EXCUSE ME!

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

HEY, STRANGER.

HEY.

GOOD TURNOUT?
YEP.

DO YOU WANT SOMETHING
TO DRINK?

ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE UP?
NO. I'M TRYING
TO HYDRATE YOU.

I'M FINE, THANKS.

I'M SORRY.
IT'S OKAY.

A CRAZY, EVIL SPIRIT
OBSESSED WITH BRA SIZE

TOOK OVER MY BODY.
IT HAPPENS.

SHE'S GONE NOW.
GOOD TO KNOW.

YOU KNOW, I'M GLAD YOU'RE
BONDING WITH YOUR GRANDPARENTS.

NO, YOU'RE NOT.
YES, I AM.

IT'S JUST WEIRD FOR ME, IS ALL.
I CAN'T RELATE TO IT.

YOU COULD IF YOU TRIED.
NO. WE'RE TOO --

[ SIGHS ]
TOO MUCH HAS HAPPENED.

I'M GLAD YOU ARE, ANYWAY.

OKAY.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO CUT YOU OFF
FROM THEM SO COMPLETELY.

IT JUST HAPPENED.

NOT HAVING THEM IN MY LIFE
JUST FELT SO RIGHT,

I JUST NEVER THOUGHT...

I'M SORRY.

I DID NOT PAY $500
FOR THIS DRESS

SO YOU COULD RUN AROUND
AND MESS IT UP.

SIT AND BE STILL.

CROSS YOUR LEGS.
YOU'RE A LADY.

GOD. I MUST HAVE HAD
A MILLION DRESSES LIKE THAT

WHEN I WAS A KID.

IT DOESN'T REALLY SCREAM
"YOU."

NO. I DID ALL THE SCREAMING.

THANK YOU FOR NOT PUTTING ME
IN A DRESS LIKE THAT.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

OF COURSE, WEARING
THOSE DRESSES -- NOT ALL BAD.

NO?

NO. THEY REALLY FLY UP
WHEN YOU TWIRL AROUND.

AND IF YOU'RE WEARING
THAT RUFFLED UNDERWEAR --

BIG CROWD-PLEASER.

IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER,

I THINK I GOT A FUNGUS
FROM THE STEAM ROOM.

IT DOES.

THANK YOU.

* HAVE FAITH IN YOU
AND THE THINGS YOU DO *

* YOU WON'T GO WRONG *
* I KNOW *

* THIS IS OUR FAMILY JEWEL *

* WE ARE FAMILY *
* SING IT TO ME *

* I GOT ALL MY SISTERS WITH ME *

* WE ARE FAMILY -- **

OH, GOOD. YOU'RE HERE.

HEY!
HI, GRANDMA.

MY GOODNESS.
WHAT'S THAT?
WE BROUGHT DESSERT.

REALLY? HOW THOUGHTFUL.
WHAT IS IT?
BLUEBERRY SHORTCAKE.

I'VE NEVER HEARD
OF BLUEBERRY SHORTCAKE.
IT'S A STARS HOLLOW SPECIALTY.

WHY IS IT ALREADY CUT?

IT'S LEFT OVER...
FROM THE WEDDING...

AT THE INN.
YES, I KNOW
WHERE THE WEDDING WAS.

SORRY. YOU WERE JUST DOING
THAT STARING THING.
YOU BROUGHT US USED DESSERT?

IT'S NOT USED.
IT'S LEFT OVER.

HOW NICE. I'LL JUST PUT IT
IN THE KITCHEN NEXT

TO MY HALF-EMPTY
BOX OF CHEER.

She's in a good mood tonight.

CAN I GET YOU A DRINK?

UH, WHITE WINE
WOULD BE GREAT.

COKE.

SO, LORELAI,
DID RORY TELL YOU

ALL ABOUT THE WONDERFUL TIME
SHE HAD AT THE CLUB?

SHE SURE DID.
YOUR FATHER
WAS SIMPLY FLYING ALL WEEK.

SHE REALLY CHARMED HIM.

AW. WELL, IF ANYBODY COULD,
IT WOULD BE HER.

IN THIS AGE OF MTV
AND 100 CHANNELS,

WHO WOULD HAVE IMAGINED
THAT A YOUNG GIRL
COULD STILL GET A THRILL

SPENDING A SIMPLE AFTERNOON
WITH HER GRANDFATHER?

THAT WINE WOULD BE
REAL GOOD RIGHT NOW.

I THINK WE SHOULD GET HER
A MEMBERSHIP, DON'T YOU?

IF SHE WANTS -- SURE.

TO HAVE A PLACE TO SOCIALIZE --

THAT'S IMPORTANT
TO A YOUNG GIRL.

NOW THAT THE CRACK DEN
HAS CLOSED DOWN ON THE CORNER,

ALL HER REALLY GOOD FRIENDS
ARE GONE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK, MOM, SHOULD I
PURSUE THE CAREER IN COMEDY?

IT'S JUST VERY INTERESTING THE
WAY THINGS TURN OUT, ISN'T IT?

[ SIGHS ]

YOU'RE HERE.
LORELAI...

DAD.
RORY, I HAVE A SURPRISE.

NOT ONLY DID I FIND THAT COPY

OF MENCKEN'S "CHRESTOMATHY"
WE DISCUSSED,

I ALSO FOUND A FIRST EDITION
OF HIS MEMOIRS AS WELL.

YOU'RE KIDDING.
IT'S IN MY OFFICE
IF YOU WANNA SEE THEM.

OH, MY GOD!
I TOTALLY WOULD!

I'D LIKE TO TAKE A LOOK
AT THOSE MYSELF.

[ INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC ]

* HERE THEY GO ONE BY ONE *

* HERE THEY GO *

* HERE THEY GO ONE BY ONE *

* HERE THEY GO *

* HERE THEY GO ONE BY ONE -- **

[ THEME MUSIC ]

[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]