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1
00:00:16,516 --> 00:00:18,976
Aah, aah!
2
00:00:24,941 --> 00:00:26,108
Oh, my God.
3
00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:27,443
Holy shit. Oh.
4
00:00:27,568 --> 00:00:28,735
What are... What are these things?!
5
00:00:28,819 --> 00:00:30,196
Do I look like I know?
6
00:00:30,321 --> 00:00:32,239
Last thing I remember, I was,
ugh, in a cave
7
00:00:32,323 --> 00:00:34,450
looking at some wet egg and...
Oh, that probably did it.
8
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:35,784
I told you not to look at that egg!
9
00:00:35,868 --> 00:00:37,078
I-It was too wet.
10
00:00:37,203 --> 00:00:38,454
You don't get to tell me what to look at.
11
00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:39,746
I've seen your Pornhub account.
12
00:00:39,830 --> 00:00:41,373
Also, who makes a Pornhub account?
13
00:00:41,457 --> 00:00:43,625
The algorithm learns your
preferences better that way.
14
00:00:43,709 --> 00:00:45,502
Plus if you get in kind
of a cool enough relationship,
15
00:00:45,586 --> 00:00:47,129
you can sort of follow each other
16
00:00:47,213 --> 00:00:48,547
and check out
each other's kinks, you know?
17
00:00:48,631 --> 00:00:50,174
Alright, God damn, sold.
18
00:00:50,299 --> 00:00:51,592
- How do we get out of here?
- Morty, relax.
19
00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:53,469
They're face-hugging parasites.
20
00:00:53,594 --> 00:00:56,594
I don't think their society's
gonna be that hard to navigate.
21
00:00:57,723 --> 00:01:00,685
Okay, yeah, this might be
a little harder than I thought.
22
00:01:00,810 --> 00:01:03,479
Holy shit.
They've got an M&M's store.
23
00:01:37,471 --> 00:01:39,848
This is bad, Rick.
Th-Th-Th-Th-This is really bad.
24
00:01:39,932 --> 00:01:41,267
Just be cool, Morty.
25
00:01:41,392 --> 00:01:42,559
All we gotta do is blend in,
find our ship,
26
00:01:42,643 --> 00:01:44,478
and get the fuck outta here.
27
00:01:44,604 --> 00:01:46,230
Alright, Morty, here's the plan,
put this back on your face.
28
00:01:46,314 --> 00:01:47,898
I-I'm not putting that back on my face!
29
00:01:47,982 --> 00:01:48,899
Relax. It's dead.
30
00:01:51,193 --> 00:01:52,570
Okay, now it's dead.
31
00:01:52,695 --> 00:01:55,406
Come on, hurry up.
32
00:01:55,531 --> 00:01:56,448
Rick, i-it's bleeding.
33
00:01:56,532 --> 00:01:57,908
I-It's bleeding acid.
34
00:01:58,034 --> 00:01:59,451
Alright, well, that should
be the last of it.
35
00:01:59,535 --> 00:02:01,829
If not, then just gimme
two tugs on the arm.
36
00:02:05,541 --> 00:02:07,251
Seems like a self-destructive life cycle.
37
00:02:07,335 --> 00:02:08,669
Is that gonna happen to us?
38
00:02:08,753 --> 00:02:10,128
You feel an egg in your stomach?
39
00:02:10,212 --> 00:02:13,049
- No.
- Well, glass half full.
40
00:02:13,174 --> 00:02:14,216
- How's it going?
- 'Sup.
41
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:15,592
- Glory to Glorzo.
- Totally.
42
00:02:15,676 --> 00:02:16,802
Love Glorzo.
43
00:02:16,927 --> 00:02:18,429
Glorzo is peace.
44
00:02:18,554 --> 00:02:20,014
Peace is Glorzo.
45
00:02:20,139 --> 00:02:22,433
Wow, just cogs in the machine, y'know?
46
00:02:22,558 --> 00:02:24,268
- Ma-Makes you think...
- Yeah, I'm sure you'll make this
47
00:02:24,352 --> 00:02:26,228
into a beautiful short film
that your parents'll pay for,
48
00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:28,313
Morty, but right now, we really
just need to find my ship.
49
00:02:28,397 --> 00:02:29,940
You sure you're not just jealous?
50
00:02:30,024 --> 00:02:32,150
Looks like I'm kind of
a celebrity around here.
51
00:02:32,234 --> 00:02:33,903
The future is Glorzo!
52
00:02:34,028 --> 00:02:36,781
Oh, my God.
I was just reading you.
53
00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:39,241
Congratulations on making it
into print media.
54
00:02:39,367 --> 00:02:40,868
Real bright future there.
55
00:02:40,993 --> 00:02:42,828
Honestly, it's shocking to see
the two of you together.
56
00:02:42,912 --> 00:02:44,789
Because we're both geniuses?
57
00:02:44,914 --> 00:02:46,582
No, because I've seen your videos,
58
00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:48,292
and you make me fucking sick.
59
00:02:48,417 --> 00:02:50,002
Fix him.
60
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:53,547
Glory to Glorzo.
61
00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:54,923
Sir, you shouldn't wander off like that.
62
00:02:55,007 --> 00:02:56,300
We've been looking all over for you.
63
00:02:56,384 --> 00:02:57,884
The project is ready for your approval.
64
00:02:57,968 --> 00:02:59,553
Sir, is this man bothering you?
65
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:01,055
Um, no, h-he's fine.
66
00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:02,848
Uh, what... what project?
67
00:03:02,973 --> 00:03:05,351
Jesus Christ, who the fuck was I?
68
00:03:05,476 --> 00:03:08,896
Here's a scientific fact
I'm not allowed to say...
69
00:03:09,021 --> 00:03:13,150
Our hosts are biologically
designed to incubate our eggs.
70
00:03:13,275 --> 00:03:15,403
If that "triggers" you, fuck off.
71
00:03:15,528 --> 00:03:16,987
If it doesn't, please like and subscribe.
72
00:03:17,071 --> 00:03:18,781
New videos every Glorzday.
73
00:03:18,906 --> 00:03:20,491
God, was I at least rich?
74
00:03:20,616 --> 00:03:22,200
I mean, d-d-did I at least sell out
75
00:03:22,284 --> 00:03:23,702
and sell vitamins or something?
76
00:03:23,786 --> 00:03:25,203
Rick, I've watched enough Pornhub to know
77
00:03:25,287 --> 00:03:26,705
what a studio apartment looks like.
78
00:03:26,789 --> 00:03:28,207
God damn.
79
00:03:28,332 --> 00:03:30,668
Jesus, your Glorzo got shit done.
80
00:03:30,793 --> 00:03:33,421
My lord, we await your command.
81
00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:34,505
Oh, to
82
00:03:34,630 --> 00:03:36,215
shoot it?
A-At people?
83
00:03:36,340 --> 00:03:37,675
Glorzo is peace.
84
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:39,343
All shall be made Glorzo.
85
00:03:39,468 --> 00:03:41,303
Glory to Glorzo.
86
00:03:41,429 --> 00:03:42,930
I... did this?
87
00:03:43,055 --> 00:03:46,434
You and the amazing technology
you both brought us.
88
00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:47,810
Yeah, makes sense.
89
00:03:47,935 --> 00:03:49,061
A-And where was this heading?
90
00:03:49,145 --> 00:03:50,187
Earth?
Probably Earth?
91
00:03:50,271 --> 00:03:51,814
The humans
call it "Earth."
92
00:03:51,939 --> 00:03:54,066
Yeah, well, okay,
first of all, great work.
93
00:03:54,191 --> 00:03:55,984
You guys obviously put a lot
of work into this.
94
00:03:56,068 --> 00:03:57,568
- Okay.
- And y'know, it shows.
95
00:03:57,653 --> 00:03:59,613
I-It really shows.
But um...
96
00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:01,073
I-I've been thinking, and, you know,
97
00:04:01,157 --> 00:04:03,200
maybe we should just call this off.
98
00:04:03,325 --> 00:04:04,869
Sorry, is... is there more?
99
00:04:04,994 --> 00:04:06,120
Nope, nope.
100
00:04:06,245 --> 00:04:08,038
I-I guess, uh, that... that's it.
101
00:04:08,164 --> 00:04:11,000
Just don't Glorzo Earth.
102
00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:13,711
Just would've been nice
to have heard this sooner
103
00:04:13,836 --> 00:04:15,379
before we spent all day on it.
104
00:04:15,504 --> 00:04:17,506
Yeah, well, I-I'm just hearing
about it, too.
105
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:18,966
- You ordered it.
- Right.
106
00:04:19,091 --> 00:04:20,634
I-I did, and, um...
107
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,344
I'm just saying for next time,
maybe put more thought
108
00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:24,096
into it before a whole day of...
109
00:04:24,221 --> 00:04:26,139
Okay, well, I'm sorry I made you
do your job for a fucking day!
110
00:04:26,223 --> 00:04:27,474
You look like you were all really busy
111
00:04:27,558 --> 00:04:29,059
before I came and fucked it all up.
112
00:04:29,143 --> 00:04:30,227
Boy, oh boy, huh?
This guy's a genius, but at...
113
00:04:30,311 --> 00:04:31,478
But at what price, you know?
114
00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:32,688
Y'know, fuck you, Rick!
115
00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:35,024
Who's... Rick?
116
00:04:35,149 --> 00:04:36,650
Yeah, well, if we're free
to ask questions,
117
00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:39,361
why haven't you blinked,
uh, for 20 minutes,
118
00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:42,948
and why, uh, doesn't
your mouth move when you talk?
119
00:04:45,284 --> 00:04:46,994
Ah, geez, look at me.
120
00:04:47,119 --> 00:04:48,912
I-I feel down on... on... on the floor.
121
00:04:48,996 --> 00:04:51,373
Oh, let... let me, uh, help...
Help you out here, buddy.
122
00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,667
Ah, thanks, man.
Thanks, pal. That's right.
123
00:04:53,793 --> 00:04:57,004
I'm right back where... where...
Right back in the saddle here.
124
00:04:59,924 --> 00:05:01,884
Alright, fuck it, run.
125
00:05:24,156 --> 00:05:25,991
I-I hate this!
I hate all of this!
126
00:05:26,116 --> 00:05:27,451
Yeah, yeah, keep that feedback
coming, Morty.
127
00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:29,286
It can only help.
128
00:05:33,749 --> 00:05:36,126
- Oh, shit.
- Aw, man!
129
00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:37,753
How big is this city?!
130
00:05:37,878 --> 00:05:39,171
I know, it's like pick a lane.
131
00:05:39,255 --> 00:05:41,205
Are you face huggers or industrialists?
132
00:05:44,134 --> 00:05:46,261
Damn, feels kinda good
when there's no guilt, huh?
133
00:05:46,345 --> 00:05:47,679
Yeah, it's...
It's like in "Star Wars."
134
00:05:47,763 --> 00:05:48,972
Yeah, just like
in "Star Wars."
135
00:05:49,056 --> 00:05:50,891
Go nuts!
136
00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:56,563
Nice, Morty! Give a little
"yee-haw" if you want.
137
00:05:56,647 --> 00:05:58,440
They... They always do a little
"yee-haw" like a cowboy.
138
00:05:58,524 --> 00:05:59,649
Yee... Yee-ha... Yee-haw.
139
00:05:59,733 --> 00:06:01,235
Good enough.
140
00:06:10,911 --> 00:06:12,454
God, I needed this.
141
00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:14,080
Honestly, it's been a while
since I've been able
142
00:06:14,164 --> 00:06:15,332
to just let loose, you know?
143
00:06:15,416 --> 00:06:16,834
Just have fun.
I'm... I'm...
144
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:18,502
I'm sorry if I've been
taking it out on you.
145
00:06:18,586 --> 00:06:20,754
No, I get it. You got a lot
on your plate, amigo.
146
00:06:20,838 --> 00:06:22,172
I-I just wish you'd open up
147
00:06:22,256 --> 00:06:23,507
to me more about it sometimes, you know?
148
00:06:23,591 --> 00:06:25,008
- I-I-I'm your partner.
- Thanks, Morty.
149
00:06:25,092 --> 00:06:26,468
I mean that.
Thank you.
150
00:06:26,594 --> 00:06:27,969
Sometimes, I get a little
in my head, you know?
151
00:06:28,053 --> 00:06:29,596
Hey, man, that head's a good place to be.
152
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,723
Just remember to let me
in sometimes, you know?
153
00:06:31,807 --> 00:06:34,018
Will do, buddy.
Motherfucker.
154
00:06:38,063 --> 00:06:39,606
Oh, my God, this is so much fun!
155
00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:40,858
I don't want to stop!
156
00:06:40,983 --> 00:06:42,783
Yeah, it's like popping bubble wrap.
157
00:06:52,244 --> 00:06:53,954
Honestly, I'm proud of us for not.
158
00:06:54,079 --> 00:06:55,748
Totally.
It would've been cheap.
159
00:06:55,873 --> 00:06:58,673
Yeah, real low-hanging fruit,
and we're better than that.
160
00:07:00,669 --> 00:07:02,254
Pearl Harbor, on the other hand...
161
00:07:02,338 --> 00:07:04,423
Yeah, I think that's in-bounds.
162
00:07:08,677 --> 00:07:09,929
I am the god of death!
163
00:07:10,054 --> 00:07:12,264
Should've been a better species!
164
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,981
So, you did a 9/11?
165
00:07:21,106 --> 00:07:22,358
Almost did a 9/11.
166
00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:23,942
We... We went with a Pearl Harbor.
167
00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:25,152
We're pretty classy.
168
00:07:25,277 --> 00:07:27,363
Why were either of those an option?
169
00:07:27,488 --> 00:07:28,530
Ask the Saudis.
170
00:07:28,656 --> 00:07:29,657
Wow. Damn.
171
00:07:29,782 --> 00:07:31,075
Yeah, getting political.
172
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:32,701
I'm political now.
How 'bout you, Jerry?
173
00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,120
You got anything to add
to the family dynamic?
174
00:07:35,245 --> 00:07:37,539
I've been getting into beekeeping lately.
175
00:07:41,043 --> 00:07:42,419
Is something wrong with that?
176
00:07:42,503 --> 00:07:43,712
What's wrong with that?
177
00:07:43,837 --> 00:07:45,881
Don't I have the right
to be happy? To exist?
178
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:47,549
I'm sorry I didn't 9/11
179
00:07:47,675 --> 00:07:49,843
Pearl Harbor before breakfast,
but I have a life, too!
180
00:07:49,927 --> 00:07:51,469
- I have dreams!
- And how's Summer?
181
00:07:51,553 --> 00:07:54,348
Did she have fun, too?
182
00:07:54,473 --> 00:07:56,266
Oh.
Uh-um.
183
00:07:56,392 --> 00:07:58,018
Summer...
was...
184
00:07:58,143 --> 00:07:59,269
With us.
185
00:07:59,395 --> 00:08:00,688
There.
186
00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,940
You saw us take her in the car with us.
187
00:08:03,065 --> 00:08:05,275
- Mm, yes.
- Yes, yes, of course.
188
00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:06,568
Th-That's what happened.
189
00:08:06,652 --> 00:08:08,529
- And now she's...
- Sleepy.
190
00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:10,656
Um, she's... she's sleepy.
191
00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:12,115
Really sleepy.
That's why she's not here.
192
00:08:12,199 --> 00:08:13,242
So sleepy.
193
00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:14,743
She's sleepy?!
194
00:08:14,868 --> 00:08:15,994
What the hell was that?!
195
00:08:16,078 --> 00:08:17,728
I didn't see you trying anything!
196
00:08:17,830 --> 00:08:19,289
Shitting the bed isn't better
than not shitting the bed!
197
00:08:19,373 --> 00:08:20,958
Where's Summer?!
198
00:08:23,919 --> 00:08:25,754
Geez.
Oh, man.
199
00:08:25,879 --> 00:08:27,547
You know, maybe we went
too hardcore on these guys.
200
00:08:27,631 --> 00:08:28,798
Yeah, why do you think we never go back
201
00:08:28,882 --> 00:08:30,382
to a place we've already been?
202
00:08:30,467 --> 00:08:31,801
Do you know how many adventures
we could get out
203
00:08:31,885 --> 00:08:33,178
of Purge Planet, Morty?
Gear World?
204
00:08:33,262 --> 00:08:34,846
I don't sequel.
It's called integrity.
205
00:08:34,930 --> 00:08:36,264
Here, put this back on your face.
206
00:08:36,348 --> 00:08:38,642
- You kept it?
- Oh, did you want a new one?
207
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,021
- 'Sup?
- Yo.
208
00:08:42,146 --> 00:08:43,772
Oh, shit.
It's them!
209
00:08:43,897 --> 00:08:45,899
The worst thing to ever happen to us!
210
00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:47,317
Yeah, that makes sense.
211
00:08:47,443 --> 00:08:48,568
Sorry, Morty, we tried pussin' it.
212
00:08:48,652 --> 00:08:50,154
Time to go in hot.
213
00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:52,679
Rickputer, initiate
unnecessarily badass suit-up.
214
00:09:03,792 --> 00:09:05,210
Let's lick tits.
215
00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:14,135
Shouldn't we be finding Summer?
216
00:09:14,219 --> 00:09:16,388
Oh, right, gee, sorry.
I got caught up again.
217
00:09:16,472 --> 00:09:18,223
God, d-do I need to take more Adderall,
218
00:09:18,307 --> 00:09:20,267
or am I taking too much Adderall?
219
00:09:27,983 --> 00:09:30,194
Man, really shouldn't have gone
with swords.
220
00:09:30,319 --> 00:09:31,987
I know.
My wrists are killing me.
221
00:09:32,112 --> 00:09:34,406
Flame-throwers next time, for sure.
222
00:09:34,531 --> 00:09:36,033
Can I get a laser whip?
223
00:09:36,158 --> 00:09:40,204
Okay, but there's no way
you don't chop your dick off.
224
00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:42,664
Sum Sum, come with us if you want to live
225
00:09:42,790 --> 00:09:44,917
at a lower standard than this, I guess.
226
00:09:45,042 --> 00:09:46,335
God damn.
227
00:09:46,460 --> 00:09:48,921
- Empress, is everything alright?
- Ummm
228
00:09:49,046 --> 00:09:50,255
seize them!
229
00:09:50,380 --> 00:09:51,590
- Seize them?!
- What?!
230
00:09:51,715 --> 00:09:54,015
- Summer, you bitch!
- You gotta be kidding me!
231
00:09:54,343 --> 00:09:57,429
♪ Nobody knows the trouble
I've seen ♪
232
00:09:57,554 --> 00:09:58,847
You know that song, Rick?
233
00:09:58,972 --> 00:10:00,140
From the... When the prisoners sing it?
234
00:10:00,224 --> 00:10:01,683
Come on, Morty, for fuck's sake.
235
00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:04,267
It's my jail time.
I-I can spend it however I want.
236
00:10:06,438 --> 00:10:07,814
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, buddy!
Hey, hey, hey!
237
00:10:07,898 --> 00:10:09,108
Not in here!
Not in here!
238
00:10:09,233 --> 00:10:11,235
Aw...
Gimme that.
239
00:10:13,153 --> 00:10:15,322
Leave us.
240
00:10:15,447 --> 00:10:17,047
What the fuck took you so long?!
241
00:10:17,157 --> 00:10:18,075
You left me here.
242
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:19,159
We didn't know you were with us!
243
00:10:19,243 --> 00:10:20,952
Do you know how much shit
I've had to deal with?
244
00:10:21,036 --> 00:10:22,245
You're in a cape, Summer.
245
00:10:22,329 --> 00:10:23,330
How bad could it be?
246
00:10:23,455 --> 00:10:25,541
No bad story ends with a cape.
247
00:10:25,666 --> 00:10:28,669
You don't know anything about my story.
248
00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:30,921
"I couldn't help but wonder,
249
00:10:31,046 --> 00:10:34,299
was Gharkhul really capable
of consuming a living sun,
250
00:10:34,424 --> 00:10:37,136
or was I simply getting
too close to Gharkhul?
251
00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:38,679
Was Gharkhul consuming me?"
252
00:10:38,804 --> 00:10:40,221
Rick, can we listen to something else?
253
00:10:40,305 --> 00:10:41,848
Quiet! She's just about
to summon Gharkhul.
254
00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:43,558
She's been talking about
summoning Gharkhul
255
00:10:43,642 --> 00:10:44,992
for three episodes, Summer.
256
00:10:45,102 --> 00:10:46,770
Wait a minute, what's that in your mouth?
257
00:10:46,854 --> 00:10:48,105
It's a toothpick.
258
00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:49,939
I'm a toothpicker now.
Get used to it.
259
00:10:50,023 --> 00:10:51,941
God, are you that desperate for a thing?
260
00:10:52,025 --> 00:10:53,735
It is my thing.
261
00:10:53,861 --> 00:10:56,864
Just like yours is dying alone
and yours is jerking off.
262
00:10:56,989 --> 00:10:59,700
At least jerking off tracks
for my character, you know?
263
00:10:59,825 --> 00:11:02,119
I like to jerk off.
I'm 14. I own it.
264
00:11:02,244 --> 00:11:03,703
- Well, I jerk off, too!
- Alright, stop.
265
00:11:03,787 --> 00:11:05,330
Jesus Chris, I don't wanna think
about that shit.
266
00:11:05,414 --> 00:11:06,998
- Summer, keep your toothpick.
- Gross!
267
00:11:07,082 --> 00:11:08,541
Morty, stop talking to
your sister about jerking off.
268
00:11:08,625 --> 00:11:10,675
Everyone pretend podcasting isn't boring.
269
00:11:13,297 --> 00:11:15,215
Whoa, Morty, look how wet this egg is.
270
00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:17,258
I dunno, Rick.
That looks a little too wet.
271
00:11:17,342 --> 00:11:18,676
- D-Don't touch it.
- Oh, I'm gonna touch it.
272
00:11:18,760 --> 00:11:20,095
Why are you guys screaming at an egg?
273
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:21,429
Shut up, Summer!
Just let us look at an egg!
274
00:11:21,513 --> 00:11:22,806
Yeah, Summer, shut the fuck up.
275
00:11:22,890 --> 00:11:24,390
- Fucking shit.
- Nobody wants you here.
276
00:11:24,474 --> 00:11:25,892
You know, sometimes we like
to go on adventures
277
00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:27,227
- and look at wet eggs, you know?
- Can we just go?
278
00:11:27,311 --> 00:11:28,436
This place is giving me the creeps.
279
00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:29,729
Holy shit.
I love this egg.
280
00:11:29,813 --> 00:11:30,939
Hey, look, mine's doing it, too.
281
00:11:31,023 --> 00:11:33,525
Are you guys sure that's safe?
282
00:11:33,650 --> 00:11:35,569
Oh, my God!
283
00:11:39,364 --> 00:11:41,074
All is Glorzo.
284
00:11:44,703 --> 00:11:47,080
All is Glorzo.
285
00:11:48,916 --> 00:11:50,083
- God.
- God.
286
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:52,211
God?
She has a toothpick.
287
00:11:52,336 --> 00:11:54,254
Take it out and put her face in an egg.
288
00:11:54,338 --> 00:11:55,797
- God.
- God.
289
00:11:55,923 --> 00:11:57,674
For fuck's sake, how long
have you been hatched?
290
00:11:57,758 --> 00:11:58,884
30 seconds?
291
00:11:59,009 --> 00:12:01,178
I've been alive seven minutes.
292
00:12:01,303 --> 00:12:03,638
- Think before you...
- Excuse me, seven minutes?
293
00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:05,891
Uh, I've been here for 29 minutes.
294
00:12:06,016 --> 00:12:08,059
But yes, take the toothpick
out of her mouth.
295
00:12:08,143 --> 00:12:11,313
Suck on her face this instant
and use her body to...
296
00:12:15,609 --> 00:12:16,735
What was that?
297
00:12:16,860 --> 00:12:18,946
That is called responsibility.
298
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:21,021
He was part of our greatest generation.
299
00:12:21,114 --> 00:12:24,159
He understood that what you need
to do is suck on a face,
300
00:12:24,284 --> 00:12:25,953
shit an egg, and die.
301
00:12:26,078 --> 00:12:27,745
Wait, so, all you do is live
half an hour,
302
00:12:27,829 --> 00:12:28,830
shit eggs, and die?
303
00:12:28,956 --> 00:12:30,457
Yes.
We love it.
304
00:12:30,582 --> 00:12:31,917
I'll do it right now.
305
00:12:36,046 --> 00:12:38,173
Okay, you guys don't have
to listen to me,
306
00:12:38,298 --> 00:12:40,259
but I vote you don't do that?
307
00:12:40,384 --> 00:12:42,761
And who's up for
changing things around here?
308
00:12:51,061 --> 00:12:52,687
♪ Well, I was
hatched from an egg ♪
309
00:12:52,771 --> 00:12:54,815
♪ Laid by some guy ♪
310
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:57,818
♪ 'Cause that is Glorzo's way ♪
311
00:12:57,943 --> 00:13:01,738
♪ And then it came time
to lay my own egg and die ♪
312
00:13:01,863 --> 00:13:03,282
♪ But Summer, she said ♪
313
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:08,662
♪ "Hey, Glorzo
wants you to stay" ♪
314
00:13:08,787 --> 00:13:11,665
♪ Glory to Glorzo ♪
315
00:13:11,790 --> 00:13:15,168
♪ Means glory to me ♪
316
00:13:15,294 --> 00:13:16,878
♪ If we're only making eggs ♪
317
00:13:17,004 --> 00:13:21,049
♪ Are we ever making
Glorzo free? ♪
318
00:13:21,174 --> 00:13:23,760
Alright, look, uh, this shit's
been brewing for a while.
319
00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:26,638
I'm not gonna win any popularity
contests by saying it,
320
00:13:26,763 --> 00:13:28,974
but here's...
Here's the world as I see it.
321
00:13:29,099 --> 00:13:30,642
♪ And for all we know ♪
322
00:13:30,767 --> 00:13:32,269
♪ Everything we've known ♪
323
00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:36,231
♪ Is just some shit
we made up ♪
324
00:13:36,356 --> 00:13:39,109
♪ Glory to Glorzo ♪
325
00:13:39,234 --> 00:13:42,571
♪ Means glory to me ♪
326
00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:44,697
♪ We got too many eggs
and not enough society ♪
327
00:13:44,781 --> 00:13:46,783
I mean, look, we are designed
to suck on faces and lay eggs.
328
00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:49,494
Life is life, and that's the way it goes.
329
00:13:55,667 --> 00:13:57,336
Hello, Troy.
Hello, Jez.
330
00:13:57,461 --> 00:13:59,420
- How is it going?
- Really good, commander.
331
00:13:59,504 --> 00:14:00,904
Should be ready by tomorrow.
332
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:02,215
That is what I like to hear.
333
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:04,301
Great work, Glory to Glorzo.
334
00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:07,512
Honestly, Summer,
I can't thank you enough.
335
00:14:07,637 --> 00:14:10,140
When we met, we were just
shitting eggs in a cave,
336
00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:13,143
but you showed us life
is about more than that.
337
00:14:13,268 --> 00:14:14,686
It is about living.
338
00:14:14,811 --> 00:14:16,646
And now, with these missiles,
339
00:14:16,772 --> 00:14:19,441
we will be able to reach
the entire universe.
340
00:14:19,566 --> 00:14:23,403
We say it all the time,
but I guess all is Glorzo.
341
00:14:23,528 --> 00:14:24,654
Yeah, that sounds great.
342
00:14:24,738 --> 00:14:26,323
- And you've been great.
- Yeah.
343
00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:28,366
You've been so great
that I've been thinking
344
00:14:28,450 --> 00:14:30,744
maybe it's time for you
to get off my brother.
345
00:14:30,869 --> 00:14:32,245
Who's your brother?
346
00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:33,455
Oh, this?
347
00:14:33,580 --> 00:14:34,915
Forgot he was there, haha.
348
00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:36,583
Wait.
What are you saying?
349
00:14:36,708 --> 00:14:38,459
I'm saying that you've been great, Steve,
350
00:14:38,543 --> 00:14:40,920
but we've been thinking
it's time for a new chapter.
351
00:14:41,004 --> 00:14:42,756
- We?
- Uh, this is Shane.
352
00:14:42,881 --> 00:14:44,465
He'll be handling the day-to-day.
353
00:14:44,549 --> 00:14:46,099
It's an honor to meet you, sir.
354
00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:49,304
I might only be two minutes old,
but I know you're a legend.
355
00:14:50,097 --> 00:14:51,397
She doesn't care about us.
356
00:14:51,515 --> 00:14:53,475
She just wants her fuckin' host back.
357
00:14:53,600 --> 00:14:55,893
- I don't know what to do.
- Oh, now you want my help.
358
00:14:55,977 --> 00:14:57,270
- Too late for that.
- Come on, man.
359
00:14:57,354 --> 00:14:58,480
What is this shit?
360
00:14:58,605 --> 00:14:59,856
You don't get to do this to me.
361
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:01,233
We were in eggs together.
362
00:15:01,358 --> 00:15:02,775
Oh, fuck since we were in eggs.
363
00:15:02,859 --> 00:15:04,027
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah,
now you respect, like,
364
00:15:04,111 --> 00:15:05,779
the biological institutions now?
365
00:15:05,904 --> 00:15:07,196
Fuck you.
All you care about
366
00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:09,616
is "progress"
and society and skyscrapers.
367
00:15:09,741 --> 00:15:11,409
You don't care about fuckin' biology.
368
00:15:11,493 --> 00:15:13,286
Oh, yeah, well, what the fuck?
369
00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:15,496
You... How you you haven't laid
and egg inside this old man yet?
370
00:15:15,580 --> 00:15:17,082
Because I do what I want.
371
00:15:17,207 --> 00:15:18,333
Because someone's gotta
stand up for what's right.
372
00:15:18,417 --> 00:15:19,625
Why do you hate her so much?
373
00:15:19,709 --> 00:15:23,171
Because she took you away from me!
374
00:15:23,296 --> 00:15:25,006
Whoa, man.
Jesus Christ.
375
00:15:25,132 --> 00:15:27,551
- No, I-I didn't, I...
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. No.
376
00:15:27,676 --> 00:15:29,928
It's cool.
377
00:15:30,053 --> 00:15:31,805
I feel the same way.
378
00:15:36,351 --> 00:15:38,228
Oh, my God, I...
379
00:15:38,353 --> 00:15:39,896
I wish we could suck on each other.
380
00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,523
- I wanna suck on you, too.
- I'm gonna suck you so hard.
381
00:15:42,607 --> 00:15:44,192
- Suck me.
- C-C-Can we do this?
382
00:15:44,317 --> 00:15:45,651
A-A-Are we allowed to do this?
383
00:15:45,735 --> 00:15:47,404
I don't care.
I just want you.
384
00:15:47,529 --> 00:15:48,697
Fuck all of this.
385
00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:50,073
Let's just get the hell outta here
386
00:15:50,157 --> 00:15:52,033
and be whatever the fuck we want.
387
00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:54,578
That's evolution.
That's progress.
388
00:15:54,703 --> 00:15:57,164
I want a family.
Can we have a family.
389
00:15:57,289 --> 00:15:58,999
Yeah.
390
00:16:06,882 --> 00:16:08,508
Aah, aah!
391
00:16:14,931 --> 00:16:16,016
Oh, my God.
392
00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:17,893
Holy shit.
Oh.
393
00:16:18,018 --> 00:16:19,143
What are... What are these things?!
394
00:16:19,227 --> 00:16:20,228
Do I look like I know?
395
00:16:20,312 --> 00:16:22,397
Hey, wait a second.
How'd you know that last part?
396
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:24,357
You weren't there for that.
I had to fill in some gaps.
397
00:16:24,441 --> 00:16:26,609
Everyone around the office
knew about Steve and Bruce.
398
00:16:26,693 --> 00:16:30,405
I've got a plan, okay.
You just have to follow my lead.
399
00:16:30,530 --> 00:16:32,824
The punishment is
400
00:16:32,949 --> 00:16:34,325
- death.
- Motherfucker. Summer!
401
00:16:34,409 --> 00:16:36,209
- You said you had a plan!
- Silence.
402
00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:38,455
The council of Glorzos has spoken.
403
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:39,872
More like council of shit.
404
00:16:39,956 --> 00:16:41,958
- Glorzo is law.
- Silence.
405
00:16:42,083 --> 00:16:44,794
The punishment is death.
406
00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:47,297
By...
getting into their car.
407
00:16:47,422 --> 00:16:48,924
- Summer?
- Shut up.
408
00:16:49,049 --> 00:16:51,760
Yes, place them in the car.
409
00:16:51,885 --> 00:16:53,053
Those pieces of shit.
410
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:54,804
No, no, no!
This is like torture.
411
00:16:54,930 --> 00:16:56,890
No, I-I-I-I hate being in my car.
412
00:16:57,015 --> 00:16:59,518
You deserve it, you pieces of shit.
413
00:16:59,643 --> 00:17:01,561
And to make sure the sentence is passed,
414
00:17:01,645 --> 00:17:03,396
I shall be joining them.
415
00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:04,856
In the car.
416
00:17:04,981 --> 00:17:07,817
And we shall drive away
from here and die.
417
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,319
Oooookay.
418
00:17:09,444 --> 00:17:10,946
Guess what, everybody.
419
00:17:11,071 --> 00:17:13,698
It's me, the whiny guy
you never want to hear from.
420
00:17:13,823 --> 00:17:15,773
She's trying to escape with her family.
421
00:17:15,867 --> 00:17:16,910
My time to shine.
422
00:17:17,035 --> 00:17:18,453
Execute her.
423
00:17:18,578 --> 00:17:21,122
Okay, plan B.
Morty, now.
424
00:17:22,916 --> 00:17:24,668
Aah!
425
00:17:24,793 --> 00:17:26,419
Jesus, Morty, that sucks.
426
00:17:26,545 --> 00:17:27,712
Alright, stop playing, Morty.
427
00:17:27,796 --> 00:17:29,130
I-I got this.
428
00:17:30,674 --> 00:17:31,841
Aah!
429
00:17:36,972 --> 00:17:39,182
This is what we get for evolving?
430
00:17:39,307 --> 00:17:41,351
Sorry!
Sorry.
431
00:17:41,476 --> 00:17:43,561
I-I'm sorry. We... We...
We thought you were evil.
432
00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:45,230
Why would you think that?
433
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:48,191
We had a giant tower
that blared "Glorzo is peace."
434
00:17:48,316 --> 00:17:49,775
I know.
I... Should... Should we help?
435
00:17:49,859 --> 00:17:50,819
Boo!
436
00:17:50,944 --> 00:17:52,111
Oh, like that's helping.
437
00:17:52,195 --> 00:17:53,946
Got it. Going.
Okay, we're gonna hit the road.
438
00:17:54,030 --> 00:17:57,075
- You're... You're just going?
- You told us to go!
439
00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:59,286
Once again, I'm so sorry for what they...
440
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:00,828
You're part of this, too.
Boo!
441
00:18:00,912 --> 00:18:02,038
We hate you the most.
442
00:18:02,163 --> 00:18:04,332
Get out.
443
00:18:04,457 --> 00:18:06,000
Jesus, Summer, why'd you let these things
444
00:18:06,084 --> 00:18:07,234
stay on us for so long?
445
00:18:07,335 --> 00:18:08,795
I was working with a lot.
446
00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:11,423
Just let me listen
to the podcast next time.
447
00:18:15,885 --> 00:18:17,429
Nailed that landing.
448
00:18:19,389 --> 00:18:21,683
Huh.
Neat-looking egg.
449
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,315
Okay, well, I'm not
cleaning up this shit.
450
00:18:29,399 --> 00:18:31,985
Aah!
451
00:18:36,489 --> 00:18:39,033
Maybe we, uh... Maybe we don't
tell people about this one.
452
00:18:39,117 --> 00:18:40,535
Did we at least learn something?
453
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:42,746
That we suck and everyone sucks?
454
00:18:42,871 --> 00:18:45,498
I guess that counts.
455
00:18:45,624 --> 00:18:46,791
Later, chodes.
456
00:18:46,916 --> 00:18:48,543
Hit me on the next one.
457
00:18:51,504 --> 00:18:52,922
You know, Rick, I'm sure you wanna jump
458
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:55,466
into another crazy adventure,
but can we just relax
459
00:18:55,550 --> 00:18:57,260
and maybe watch
some interdimensional cable?
460
00:18:57,344 --> 00:18:59,303
- I'm cool if you are.
- Honestly, that sounds great.
461
00:18:59,387 --> 00:19:01,180
W-We don't need to try so hard, you know.
462
00:19:01,264 --> 00:19:02,974
Let's just take it easy
and riff, you know.
463
00:19:03,058 --> 00:19:05,142
- That's what I love about us.
- Me, too, buddy.
464
00:19:05,226 --> 00:19:07,020
Do you suffer from Alzheimer's?
465
00:19:07,145 --> 00:19:08,772
Do you suffer from Alzheimer's?
466
00:19:08,897 --> 00:19:10,189
Do you suffer from Alzheimer's?
467
00:19:10,273 --> 00:19:11,816
Do you suffer from Alzheimer's?
468
00:19:11,900 --> 00:19:12,984
Reggie?
469
00:19:13,109 --> 00:19:14,193
Do you suffer from Alzheimer's?
470
00:19:14,277 --> 00:19:15,444
Reggie, you alright in there?
471
00:19:15,528 --> 00:19:17,489
Mm, Rick, do you feel...
472
00:19:17,614 --> 00:19:19,949
Oh, God, I have to shit an egg.
473
00:19:20,075 --> 00:19:21,201
Oh, my God, oh, shit.
474
00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,577
Oh, it hurts.
Oh God,
475
00:19:22,702 --> 00:19:24,328
is this how we die, Rick?
Is this how we die?!
476
00:19:24,412 --> 00:19:25,788
I don't know, Morty.
I don't know! Aah!
477
00:19:25,872 --> 00:19:27,081
I don't want to shit an egg, Rick!
478
00:19:27,165 --> 00:19:28,374
I'm sorry, Morty. I'm sorry!
479
00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:29,750
It's my fault.
It's all my fault!
480
00:19:29,834 --> 00:19:31,002
Hey, you two. Did you...
481
00:19:31,086 --> 00:19:33,421
Beth, your son is dying!
Say goodbye!
482
00:19:33,546 --> 00:19:35,423
- What are you...
- Say goodbye to your little boy!
483
00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:36,841
No, look away!
484
00:19:36,966 --> 00:19:39,016
I'm making an egg, Mom.
I'm making an egg!
485
00:19:39,135 --> 00:19:41,585
You said you'd keep me more
in the loop this year.
486
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,973
Look away, Beth!
Daddy loves you!
487
00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:45,266
My ass!
My ass!
488
00:19:45,392 --> 00:19:46,518
This is it, Morty!
489
00:19:46,643 --> 00:19:48,227
It's full circle from the pilot.
490
00:19:48,311 --> 00:19:49,479
Full circle!
491
00:19:55,026 --> 00:19:56,653
Oh, I guess we, uh...
492
00:19:56,778 --> 00:19:57,945
I guess we both just had to take a shit.
493
00:19:58,029 --> 00:19:59,572
Yeah, I-I-I guess we, uh...
494
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:00,865
Fucking gross.
495
00:20:00,990 --> 00:20:02,909
Guys, clean it up.
496
00:20:35,108 --> 00:20:37,235
Look at your dad.
497
00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:40,655
Such a dork, keeping bees.
498
00:20:40,780 --> 00:20:43,032
I mean, it's... at least
it's interesting, though.
499
00:20:43,116 --> 00:20:45,410
At least, like...
I wish my dad kept bees.
500
00:20:46,870 --> 00:20:48,120
I mean, it's kind of cute.
501
00:20:48,204 --> 00:20:52,959
Like...
your dad keeps bees.
502
00:20:53,084 --> 00:20:55,503
How old is your dad?
503
00:20:55,628 --> 00:20:59,674
He's obviously beekeeping age.
504
00:20:59,799 --> 00:21:02,594
I don't know, I think it's kind of sweet.
505
00:21:05,054 --> 00:21:06,555
Summer, I want to fuck your dad.
506
00:21:06,639 --> 00:21:07,891
Oh, really?
36925
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