All language subtitles for Two Guys and a Girl S03E16 A Rookie Script.DVDRip.NonHI.cc.en.SHOUT

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:11,112 --> 00:00:14,113 AND SO, I'VE BEEN APPOINTED TO THE FUNDRAISING COMMITTEE 2 00:00:14,148 --> 00:00:15,647 AT THE CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL! 3 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:18,817 YOU'RE REALLY BEING A GOOD PERSON. 4 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,119 I DON'T GET IT. 5 00:00:20,154 --> 00:00:22,621 YOU LET US KNOW WHAT WE CAN DO TO HELP. 6 00:00:22,656 --> 00:00:27,726 ACTUALLY, UM, I'M ORGANIZING A CHARITY BACHELORS' AUCTION. 7 00:00:27,761 --> 00:00:29,761 OH, I'M AVAILABLE ANYTIME. 8 00:00:29,796 --> 00:00:31,030 ALL RIGHT! 9 00:00:31,065 --> 00:00:32,531 AFTER THAT THING! 10 00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:33,999 OH, BERG, PLEASE. 11 00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:36,635 ABSOLUTELY NOT. I KNOW HOW THESE THINGS WORK, OKAY? 12 00:00:36,670 --> 00:00:39,638 A BUNCH OF DESPERATE WIDOWS SLOBBERING ALL OVER YOU. 13 00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:40,805 PETE? 14 00:00:40,841 --> 00:00:42,341 YEAH, IT SOUNDS GOOD. 15 00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:45,110 WHO IS IT? 16 00:00:45,146 --> 00:00:46,678 Woman: IRENE! 17 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:49,714 IT'S IRENE. 18 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:53,885 HI! 19 00:00:53,921 --> 00:00:54,986 WHERE'S PETE? 20 00:00:55,022 --> 00:00:56,455 OH, HE'S NOT HERE. 21 00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:58,390 I THOUGHT I HEARD HIS VOICE. 22 00:00:58,426 --> 00:01:01,660 WELL, WHEN SHARON AND I ANSWER TOGETHER... 23 00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:03,795 IT SOUNDS LIKE PETE. 24 00:01:03,830 --> 00:01:05,997 DO YOU THINK IT WOULD BE ALL RIGHT 25 00:01:06,033 --> 00:01:09,068 IF I BORROWED SOME OF PETE'S CLOTHES TO SLEEP IN? 26 00:01:09,103 --> 00:01:11,770 NO. 27 00:01:11,805 --> 00:01:13,405 NO HARM ASKING. 28 00:01:13,441 --> 00:01:16,175 IRENE, I GOT YOUR CAT. 29 00:01:16,210 --> 00:01:18,210 I FOUND THE RASCAL IN MY PLANTS. 30 00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,545 NO, NO! 31 00:01:19,580 --> 00:01:22,548 HE'S JUST A LITTLE CUTIE. 32 00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:23,660 THANK YOU. 33 00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:26,851 OH, YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE CUTIE! 34 00:01:26,887 --> 00:01:31,656 AND SHE'S JUST A LITTLE CREEPY. 35 00:01:31,692 --> 00:01:34,025 ASHLEY HAS BEEN REALLY NICE LATELY... 36 00:01:34,061 --> 00:01:36,395 EVER SINCE SHE GOT A NEW BOYFRIEND. 37 00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:39,098 OOH! ASHLEY HAS A NEW BOYFRIEND? 38 00:01:39,133 --> 00:01:40,399 WHO IS HE? 39 00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:42,501 I DON'T KNOW. 40 00:01:42,536 --> 00:01:44,970 HERE'S ONE OF PETE'S SOCKS FOR YOUR TROUBLE. 41 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:55,747 SHARON, HOW MANY WEDDINGS HAVE YOU BEEN IN? 42 00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:58,383 THERE'S, LIKE, FIVE BRIDESMAIDS' DRESSES HERE. 43 00:01:58,419 --> 00:02:00,685 EVERYTHING'S GOT TO GO. 44 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:03,655 YOU SURE? WHAT IF BUTT UGLY COMES BACK INTO STYLE? 45 00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:07,392 HEY, I JUST DON'T NEED ANY OF THIS STUFF ANYMORE. 46 00:02:07,428 --> 00:02:11,263 I AM CLEANSING MYSELF OF THE OLD MATERIALISTIC ME. 47 00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:15,567 AND WHILE SHE'S CLEANSING, I'M MAKING OUT LIKE A BANDIT. 48 00:02:15,602 --> 00:02:18,870 JOHNNY, THIS THING DOESN'T WORK. I WANT MY MONEY BACK. 49 00:02:18,905 --> 00:02:20,951 SORRY, PETE. ALL SALES FINAL. 50 00:02:20,975 --> 00:02:24,343 BUT, JOHNNY, I ASKED YOU... BUT NOTHING. 51 00:02:24,378 --> 00:02:26,856 HEY, YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WOULDN'T BUY 52 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,348 THE EXTENDED WARRANTY FOR 50 CENTS. 53 00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:30,849 JOHNNY, IT'S NOT FAIR. 54 00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:32,951 AT LEAST THROW IN THAT FISHING POLE. 55 00:02:32,987 --> 00:02:34,319 WHAT FISHING POLE? 56 00:02:34,355 --> 00:02:36,888 YOU'RE SELLING MY FISHING POLE? 57 00:02:36,923 --> 00:02:38,723 BABY, WE AGREED. 58 00:02:38,758 --> 00:02:40,292 WE'RE CHANGING OUR LIVES. 59 00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:42,305 I'M NOT CHANGING. YOU'RE CHANGING. 60 00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:44,296 I WAS ALREADY GOOD. 61 00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:47,099 YOU HAVEN'T BEEN FISHING FOR MONTHS. 62 00:02:47,134 --> 00:02:48,467 I WENT LAST WEEKEND. 63 00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:50,435 YES, AND YOU WERE GONE ALL DAY! 64 00:02:50,471 --> 00:02:52,737 THIS IS MINE. 65 00:02:52,772 --> 00:02:55,173 IT GOES BACK IN THE CLOSET WITH MY TACKLE BOX. 66 00:02:55,209 --> 00:02:58,410 HEY, IS A TACKLE BOX SOMETHING THAT'S SQUARE AND SMELLY 67 00:02:58,445 --> 00:03:01,213 THAT YOU COULD SELL QUICK FOR ABOUT 7 BUCKS? 68 00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:04,016 YEAH. 69 00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:08,053 SWEETIE, WE HAVEN'T HUGGED IN A WHILE! 70 00:03:10,457 --> 00:03:13,958 OH, VIPER... NICE CAR! 71 00:03:13,994 --> 00:03:17,495 YEAH, TRY GETTING GROCERIES IN IT. 72 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,431 WAIT, WAIT. HOLD ON. 73 00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:21,699 THAT'S ASHLEY AND HER NEW BOYFRIEND. 74 00:03:21,734 --> 00:03:24,269 "OH, LOOK AT ME. I HAVE SO MUCH MONEY." 75 00:03:24,304 --> 00:03:25,703 WHAT A LOSER. 76 00:03:25,738 --> 00:03:28,573 OF COURSE HE IS. WHO ELSE WOULD DATE ASHLEY? 77 00:03:28,609 --> 00:03:29,874 HEY. 78 00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:33,512 THANKS. I HAD FUN. 79 00:03:33,547 --> 00:03:34,812 HEY, PETE. 80 00:03:34,848 --> 00:03:37,616 GOD, ISN'T IT A BEAUTIFUL DAY? 81 00:03:37,651 --> 00:03:38,883 I DON'T KNOW. 82 00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:42,187 WHY DON'T YOU GO AWAY, AND I'LL FIND OUT? 83 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:43,788 YOU ARE SO FUNNY! 84 00:03:43,823 --> 00:03:45,923 AAH! BERG, IT BURNS! 85 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:50,128 SO, I HEAR YOU GOT A NEW BOYFRIEND, HUH? 86 00:03:50,164 --> 00:03:51,630 YOU MIGHT REMEMBER HIM. 87 00:03:51,665 --> 00:03:54,065 HE WAS ENTERTAINING KIDS IN PEDIATRICS. 88 00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:57,502 OH, THE FAT CLOWN. CONGRATULATIONS. 89 00:03:57,538 --> 00:04:00,038 NO, THE, UM, OTHER ONE. 90 00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:02,307 NOMAR GARCIAPARRA? 91 00:04:02,342 --> 00:04:03,875 HUH. 92 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,921 WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THERE WERE 93 00:04:05,945 --> 00:04:08,191 TWO NOMAR GARCIAPARRAS IN THE WORLD? 94 00:04:08,215 --> 00:04:10,560 ONE'S THE FAMOUS BASEBALL PLAYER, 95 00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:14,052 AND THE OTHER ONE'S NOT TOO PICKY. 96 00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:21,092 PETE... 97 00:04:24,164 --> 00:04:27,566 OH, MY GOD, YOU'RE DATING NOMAR GARCIAPARRA? 98 00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:29,568 BERG, DID YOU HEAR THAT? 99 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,203 WELL, IT'S HARD NOT TO, 100 00:04:31,238 --> 00:04:34,339 WHEN YOU SQUEAL LIKE A LITTLE SCHOOLGIRL. 101 00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:36,186 DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS? 102 00:04:36,210 --> 00:04:38,221 WE GET TO HANG OUT WITH NOMAR 103 00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:39,922 AND HE'LL GIVE US BOX SEATS, 104 00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:42,547 AND WHAT'S THE CUTOFF AGE FOR BATBOYS? 105 00:04:42,583 --> 00:04:44,316 ASHLEY! 106 00:04:44,351 --> 00:04:46,718 OH, MY GOD! IT'S HIM! IT'S HIM! 107 00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:49,854 HOW DO I LOOK? HOW DO I LOOK? 108 00:04:51,692 --> 00:04:53,491 I GOT HALFWAY DOWN THE BLOCK 109 00:04:53,527 --> 00:04:55,893 AND NOTICED YOU FORGOT YOUR PURSE. 110 00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:57,229 OH, THANKS, NOMIE. 111 00:04:57,264 --> 00:05:00,031 SO, HEY, THIS IS PETE, AND THIS IS BERG. 112 00:05:00,066 --> 00:05:01,700 BERG? 113 00:05:01,735 --> 00:05:04,369 HA HA. THAT'S A FUNNY NAME. 114 00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:13,978 IT IS A FUNNY NAME, NOMAR. YOU'RE THE BEST! 115 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,120 HEY, MAN. 116 00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:24,889 WHAT'S UP, GERM? 117 00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:26,469 I REALLY WANT TO THANK YOU 118 00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:28,538 FOR GETTING ME THIS ORDERLY GIG. 119 00:05:28,562 --> 00:05:29,794 YOU'RE WELCOME. 120 00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:32,041 SO, HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO WORK HERE 121 00:05:32,065 --> 00:05:34,143 BEFORE THEY MAKE ME A DOCTOR? 122 00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:41,873 WELL, UH... WELL, IT'S A SENIORITY SYSTEM. 123 00:05:41,908 --> 00:05:45,943 BUT I'LL TELL YOU, THE NEXT DOCTOR THAT DIES... 124 00:05:45,979 --> 00:05:47,379 YOU'RE IN. 125 00:05:47,414 --> 00:05:49,347 COOL. 126 00:05:49,383 --> 00:05:52,517 HEY. WHOA, ASH, WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 127 00:05:52,552 --> 00:05:55,052 IT'S THE MIDDLE OF OUR SHIFT. 128 00:05:55,088 --> 00:05:57,188 THEY'RE LETTING ME OFF EARLY. 129 00:05:57,223 --> 00:05:59,557 BUT IT... WE'RE SWAMPED TODAY. 130 00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:02,427 I FEEL BAD, BUT NOMAR IS GETTING HIS ESPY AWARD, 131 00:06:02,462 --> 00:06:05,163 SO THE OTHER DOCTORS AGREED TO COVER FOR ME. 132 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,998 NOMAR? ESPY AWARDS? 133 00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:09,267 BERG, DID YOU HEAR THAT? 134 00:06:09,303 --> 00:06:12,870 YOUR OLD BETTY'S GOING OUT WITH A BASEBALL STUD! 135 00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:17,975 YES, I'VE HEARD. 136 00:06:18,011 --> 00:06:22,113 THAT GUY'S A STAR. OH, YOU REALLY TRADED UP. 137 00:06:22,148 --> 00:06:25,717 THANK YOU, GERM. 138 00:06:25,752 --> 00:06:29,788 YOU DUMPED HER, AND NOW YOUR EX-BETTY IS THE QUEEN BETTY. 139 00:06:29,823 --> 00:06:33,425 SHE'S THE LEADER OF ALL BETTYS IN THE FREE WORLD. 140 00:06:33,460 --> 00:06:36,461 ARE YOU GOING TO LET HIM CALL YOU A BETTY? 141 00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:39,163 IT WOULD BOTHER ME IF I WEREN'T THE QUEEN BETTY. 142 00:06:41,301 --> 00:06:44,969 OH, MAN, SHE'S FUNNY. 143 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,677 HEY, SHARON. 144 00:06:52,713 --> 00:06:54,979 HEY, IRENE. SEE ANYTHING YOU LIKE? 145 00:06:55,014 --> 00:06:56,481 OH, A GARAGE SALE! 146 00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:58,983 THIS REMINDS ME OF WHEN MY MOM 147 00:06:59,018 --> 00:07:04,121 USED TO TAKE ME SHOPPING FOR MY BIRTHDAY. 148 00:07:04,157 --> 00:07:05,724 OH! 149 00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:08,092 OH, MY GOD. 150 00:07:08,127 --> 00:07:10,729 WHERE DID YOU GET THESE BEAUTIFULLY COLORED DRESSES? 151 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:14,566 OH, ARE THEY FOR SALE, OR ARE THEY JUST FOR SHOW? 152 00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:17,502 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. THEY'RE FOR SALE. 153 00:07:17,537 --> 00:07:19,237 THEN I'M THE LUCKY LEPRECHAUN 154 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:22,707 AT THE END OF THIS BEAUTIFUL RAINBOW. 155 00:07:22,743 --> 00:07:24,942 GUESS I BETTER TAKE THEM ALL. HOW MUCH? 156 00:07:24,978 --> 00:07:26,110 UH, FIVE. 157 00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:26,944 HUNDRED? 158 00:07:26,980 --> 00:07:28,112 $500? 159 00:07:28,147 --> 00:07:30,615 YOU SAID IT... $500! NO TAKE-BACKS! 160 00:07:30,650 --> 00:07:32,950 SHOOT! YOU GOT ME THERE. I SAID IT. 161 00:07:32,986 --> 00:07:35,231 YOU WANT TO JUST WRITE ME A CHECK? 162 00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:37,756 I DON'T BELIEVE IN BANKS. THEY GET ROBBED ALL THE TIME. 163 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,258 I HIDE ALL MY MONEY IN MY JEWELRY BOX. 164 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:43,060 HEY! 165 00:07:43,096 --> 00:07:44,662 OH, HI, BERG! 166 00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:47,098 LOOK AT THESE PRETTY DRESSES I BOUGHT! 167 00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:50,034 IT'S LIKE I WAS PRACTICALLY IN THE WEDDINGS! 168 00:07:50,069 --> 00:07:52,904 YOU ARE TOO SAD. 169 00:07:52,939 --> 00:07:55,540 OH, YOU TEASE! 170 00:07:58,344 --> 00:08:00,278 WHAT'S WITH YOU? 171 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:02,224 NOTHING. IT'S ASHLEY'S NEW BOYFRIEND. 172 00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:04,159 EVERYONE THINKS HE'S SO GREAT 173 00:08:04,183 --> 00:08:06,161 JUST 'CAUSE HE'S A BASEBALL PLAYER. 174 00:08:06,185 --> 00:08:08,219 NO, HE'S A REALLY GREAT GUY. 175 00:08:08,254 --> 00:08:09,888 HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? 176 00:08:09,923 --> 00:08:12,156 WE ALL WENT OUT TO DINNER THE OTHER NIGHT 177 00:08:12,191 --> 00:08:14,893 AND HE PAID FOR EVERYTHING... BIG HIT WITH JOHNNY. 178 00:08:14,928 --> 00:08:18,162 HE WAS GREAT WITH THOSE KIDS IN THE HOSPITAL. 179 00:08:18,197 --> 00:08:20,476 OH, REALLY? DID HE HEAL THEM? 180 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,333 'CAUSE THAT'S WHAT I DO. 181 00:08:22,368 --> 00:08:23,701 YEAH, OF COURSE. 182 00:08:23,737 --> 00:08:25,269 BECAUSE WHAT YOU DO 183 00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:28,573 IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT HE DOES. 184 00:08:28,608 --> 00:08:30,753 YES, THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING. 185 00:08:30,777 --> 00:08:33,478 THAT'S WHY YOU'RE THE PERFECT GUY TO FILL THE LAST SLOT 186 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:34,879 IN THE BACHELOR AUCTION. 187 00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:38,349 I'M NOT GOING TO BE DOING THE AUCTION, OKAY? 188 00:08:38,384 --> 00:08:40,885 GIVE YOU A CHANCE TO COMPETE WITH NOMAR. 189 00:08:40,921 --> 00:08:42,386 NOMAR'S IN IT? 190 00:08:42,422 --> 00:08:44,456 HE'S GOING TO BE ON YOUR HOME TURF. 191 00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:47,258 EVERYONE AT THE HOSPITAL LOVES ME. 192 00:08:47,293 --> 00:08:48,860 YES, THEY DO. 193 00:08:48,895 --> 00:08:50,595 BUT, YOU KNOW, 194 00:08:50,630 --> 00:08:53,498 I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO SETTLE FOR NOMAR. 195 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,099 HOLD IT. 196 00:08:55,134 --> 00:08:58,402 DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO? 197 00:08:58,438 --> 00:09:00,416 YOU'RE PROTECTING YOUR NEW FRIEND NOMAR. 198 00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,107 WELL, IT DIDN'T WORK. COUNT ME IN. 199 00:09:03,142 --> 00:09:05,109 NOW, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, 200 00:09:05,144 --> 00:09:09,647 I HAVE TWO DAYS TO GET A BOD. 201 00:09:09,683 --> 00:09:13,384 MAN, I'VE SOLD ALL SORTS OF CRAP TODAY. 202 00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:29,167 PETE... ALL EYES ARE ON YOU... 203 00:09:29,202 --> 00:09:33,438 'CAUSE YOU'RE STANDING NEXT TO ME. 204 00:09:36,443 --> 00:09:39,411 YOUR FLY IS DOWN. 205 00:09:39,446 --> 00:09:41,780 I KNOW. WHATEVER IT TAKES. 206 00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:45,016 SO, SHALL WE GO, UH, PEDDLE OUR GOODS? 207 00:09:45,051 --> 00:09:48,586 YEAH. I'LL CATCH UP WITH YOU IN A SECOND. 208 00:09:48,622 --> 00:09:50,422 ALL RIGHT. 209 00:09:50,457 --> 00:09:53,958 HEY, DONNELLY, I GOT A PRESENT FOR YOU. 210 00:09:53,993 --> 00:09:55,960 WHAT'S THAT? 211 00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:04,803 THIS IS TOAST FROM MY NEW TOASTER. 212 00:10:04,838 --> 00:10:07,004 BUT... BUT LOOK, LOOK. 213 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,773 IT'S NOT CRISPY. 214 00:10:08,809 --> 00:10:11,443 IT'S... NOT CRUNCHY. 215 00:10:11,478 --> 00:10:14,312 YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT EVEN GOLDEN-BROWN. 216 00:10:14,348 --> 00:10:16,914 WELL, LOOK, IT'S NOT EVEN TOAST. 217 00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,217 IT'S BREAD. 218 00:10:19,252 --> 00:10:23,421 YOU SOLD ME A BREADER. 219 00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:25,768 I WAS AFRAID YOU WEREN'T COMING. 220 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,258 WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? 221 00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,694 SORRY, SHAR, I PASSED A MIRROR ON THE WAY OVER. 222 00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,262 YOU DO LOOK GREAT. 223 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:33,431 YOU ARE LOOKING AT THE GUY 224 00:10:33,467 --> 00:10:36,334 WHO'S GOING TO BRING IN MORE MONEY THAN ANY OTHER BACHELOR. 225 00:10:36,370 --> 00:10:37,869 YOU KNOW HOW I TOLD YOU 226 00:10:37,904 --> 00:10:40,383 PEOPLE WOULD PAY MORE FOR YOU THAN FOR NOMAR? 227 00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:46,110 THAT, IN THE CHARITY BUSINESS, IS KNOWN AS A LIE. 228 00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:48,780 YOU SEE, THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG, MY FRIEND. 229 00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,248 I OWN THIS PLACE. WATCH. 230 00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:53,251 AREN'T YOU GOING TO INTRODUCE ME TO THESE LADIES? 231 00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:54,719 THIS IS MRS. ELLIOT. 232 00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:57,522 SHE'S ONE OF THE HOSPITAL'S BIGGEST BENEFACTORS. 233 00:10:57,557 --> 00:10:59,257 HI. DR. MICHAEL BERGEN... 234 00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:02,560 THE MAY TO YOUR DECEMBER. 235 00:11:02,596 --> 00:11:05,497 THAT IS SO CHARMING! 236 00:11:05,532 --> 00:11:08,466 IT'S TOO BAD THIS ISN'T A BACHELORETTE AUCTION, 237 00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:11,168 BECAUSE I WOULD BE BIDDING ON YOU, FOXY. 238 00:11:11,204 --> 00:11:13,971 ARE YOU, UH, WILLING TO TAKE A TURN? 239 00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:15,907 UNH-UNH-UNH-UNH-UNH-UNH. 240 00:11:15,942 --> 00:11:18,543 SHOW ME THE MONEY. 241 00:11:18,578 --> 00:11:21,145 I'LL SEE YOU ON THE AUCTION BLOCK. 242 00:11:21,180 --> 00:11:23,715 WEAR YOUR BIFOCALS. 243 00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:26,984 YOU CAN COUNT ON THAT! 244 00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:30,021 OH, MY GOD! THAT'S NOMAR! 245 00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:35,159 OH, GIVE ME A PUSH, AND I'LL TOUCH HIS BUNS. 246 00:11:35,194 --> 00:11:38,430 YOU SOLD ME A BROKEN TOASTER. 247 00:11:38,465 --> 00:11:41,332 SO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. 248 00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:43,234 FINE. I WILL FIX IT! 249 00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:44,469 GOOD! 250 00:11:44,504 --> 00:11:46,404 FOR 20 BUCKS. 251 00:11:46,440 --> 00:11:48,105 Berg: CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT GUY? 252 00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:50,041 LOOK AT HIM HOGGING THE SPOTLIGHT. 253 00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:51,409 YEAH, I KNOW. 254 00:11:51,445 --> 00:11:53,411 IT SICKENS ME WHEN A SPORTS HERO 255 00:11:53,447 --> 00:11:55,580 TAKES TIME OUT OF HIS BUSY SCHEDULE 256 00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:57,081 TO RAISE MONEY FOR KIDS. 257 00:11:57,116 --> 00:11:59,395 HE'S JUST HERE FOR THE PUBLICITY. 258 00:11:59,419 --> 00:12:02,253 I'M HERE SO THE KIDS CAN GET THEIR NEW... 259 00:12:03,623 --> 00:12:07,091 PONY? 260 00:12:07,126 --> 00:12:09,794 IT'S TO BUILD A NEW CHILDREN'S WING. 261 00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:14,332 WELL, WE'RE NOT GOING TO LET THE PONY RUN WILD. 262 00:12:14,367 --> 00:12:17,335 HOW ABOUT I BUY MY TWO BUDDIES A COUPLE OF DRINKS? 263 00:12:17,370 --> 00:12:19,337 COULD YOU SEND MINE OVER THERE? 264 00:12:19,372 --> 00:12:20,883 I'M GOING TO SAY HI TO NOMAR. 265 00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:23,407 OKAY, WELL, I GUESS IT'S JUST YOU AND ME, PETE. 266 00:12:23,443 --> 00:12:24,943 OKAY, GO. 267 00:12:24,978 --> 00:12:26,277 THANKS. 268 00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:33,351 BARTENDER... YES, SIR, WHAT'S YOUR POISON? 269 00:12:36,523 --> 00:12:38,556 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 270 00:12:38,592 --> 00:12:40,825 OH, JUST DOING MY PART FOR CHARITY... 271 00:12:40,861 --> 00:12:43,795 POURING A LITTLE BOOZE FOR THE KIDS. 272 00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:45,663 POUR ME A DOUBLE. 273 00:12:45,699 --> 00:12:49,601 COME ON, YOU GOT TO GET OVER THIS NOMAR THING. 274 00:12:49,636 --> 00:12:50,969 HE'S JUST A MAN. 275 00:12:51,004 --> 00:12:53,771 HE TAKES A FASTBALL IN THE TEMPLE, 276 00:12:53,807 --> 00:12:55,907 HE'S JUST LIKE YOU AND ME. 277 00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:59,511 OH, AND HERE I WAS, GETTING ALL DOWN ON MYSELF. 278 00:12:59,546 --> 00:13:02,046 THE DRINK... NOW. 279 00:13:02,081 --> 00:13:03,781 I GOT JUST THE THING. 280 00:13:03,817 --> 00:13:05,517 I INVENTED IT MYSELF. 281 00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:08,119 IT'S CALLED... THE GERMINATOR. 282 00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:10,221 WHAT'S IN IT? 283 00:13:10,256 --> 00:13:13,958 OH, I CAN'T TELL YOU, BUT IT CLEANS WHEN IT FLUSHES. 284 00:13:18,832 --> 00:13:21,110 SO YOU AGREE WITH ME, RIGHT? 285 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:25,202 IT DOESN'T MATTER THAT SHARON SOLD JOHNNY'S TACKLE BOX. 286 00:13:25,238 --> 00:13:27,550 HE SHOULD GIVE ME MY MONEY, RIGHT? 287 00:13:27,574 --> 00:13:29,007 A DEAL IS A DEAL. 288 00:13:29,042 --> 00:13:31,009 NOMAR, IF YOU HAVE A BAD SEASON, 289 00:13:31,044 --> 00:13:33,511 DO YOU GIVE THE OWNERS THEIR MONEY BACK? 290 00:13:33,547 --> 00:13:35,980 WHICH ANSWER WILL MAKE YOU GUYS LEAVE? 291 00:13:36,016 --> 00:13:37,481 SORRY, SORRY, SORRY, NOMAR. 292 00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:39,417 WILL YOU GUYS KNOCK IT OFF? 293 00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:41,686 WE ARE HERE TO HELP SICK CHILDREN. 294 00:13:41,721 --> 00:13:44,455 LET'S TRY TO BE A LITTLE MORE CHARITABLE. 295 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:45,990 HI, GUYS. HEY, NOMIE. 296 00:13:46,026 --> 00:13:47,491 NOW, REMEMBER, BABY, 297 00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:51,029 NO MATTER WHO BUYS YOU, YOU'RE COMING HOME TO ME. 298 00:13:51,064 --> 00:13:55,099 AND, NOMAR... I LIVE DOWNSTAIRS. 299 00:13:55,134 --> 00:13:57,374 SO STOP BY, WE'LL PLAY SOME STICKBALL. 300 00:13:58,705 --> 00:14:01,072 OH, ASH, YOU KNOW WHAT? 301 00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:03,085 I HAVE A DRESS THAT'S JUST LIKE THAT. 302 00:14:03,109 --> 00:14:04,341 NOT ANYMORE. 303 00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:12,550 YOU SOLD ASHLEY MY DRESS? 304 00:14:12,586 --> 00:14:13,918 I HAD TO. 305 00:14:13,954 --> 00:14:17,989 WE WERE ALL OUT OF TACKLE BOXES. 306 00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:24,596 GERM... I CAN'T FEEL MY LIPS. 307 00:14:24,631 --> 00:14:28,332 YOU'RE IN STAGE ONE, BABY. 308 00:14:28,367 --> 00:14:33,170 HEY, YOU, JUST WANTED TO WISH YOU GOOD LUCK TONIGHT. 309 00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:36,007 YOU'RE WISHING THE WRONG GUY LUCK. 310 00:14:36,042 --> 00:14:38,020 HOW MANY OF THOSE HAVE YOU HAD? 311 00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:39,410 I DON'T KNOW. 312 00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:41,813 APPARENTLY, THE GERMINATOR 313 00:14:41,848 --> 00:14:45,216 ATTACKS THE CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM. 314 00:14:45,251 --> 00:14:50,187 ENTERING STAGE TWO. 315 00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:53,057 OKAY, WELL, I'M GOING TO THE COAT CHECK. 316 00:14:53,093 --> 00:14:55,793 CALL ME IF YOU NEED MEDICAL ATTENTION. 317 00:14:55,829 --> 00:14:58,462 I CANNOT GET OVER HOW GREAT YOU LOOK. 318 00:14:58,498 --> 00:14:59,764 OH, THANK YOU. 319 00:14:59,799 --> 00:15:02,600 HE'S GOT SOME NERVE SELLING HER MY DRESS. 320 00:15:02,636 --> 00:15:06,804 YOU'RE WISHING THE WRONG GUY LUCK. 321 00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:13,011 SOLD FOR $1,200! 322 00:15:13,046 --> 00:15:16,313 THANK YOU, DAN. 323 00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:17,982 OKAY! 324 00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:20,618 OUR NEXT HANDSOME BACHELOR UP FOR AUCTION 325 00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:22,086 IS MR. PETE DUNVILLE! 326 00:15:22,122 --> 00:15:24,856 YES! 327 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:29,426 PETE SAYS HE'S A PISCES WHO LIKES GOOD WINE, 328 00:15:29,462 --> 00:15:30,895 INTIMATE DINNERS, 329 00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:34,431 AND WOULD RATHER LISTEN THAN TALK. 330 00:15:34,467 --> 00:15:37,101 Oh! Here. 331 00:15:37,137 --> 00:15:39,370 OH, UH, "HE'D ALSO LIKE TO STRESS 332 00:15:39,405 --> 00:15:41,884 "THAT HE'S A FAIR AND ETHICAL PERSON. 333 00:15:41,908 --> 00:15:45,877 WHEN YOU BUY PETE DUNVILLE, YOU DON'T GET A BROKEN TOASTER." 334 00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:52,128 WE'LL START THE BIDDING AT $500. 335 00:15:52,152 --> 00:15:55,419 $500, DO I HEAR $550? 336 00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,689 I THINK I'M GOING TO BID ON HIM. 337 00:15:57,724 --> 00:15:59,390 HE SEEMS LIKE A NICE BOY. 338 00:15:59,425 --> 00:16:01,893 HE REMINDS ME OF MY GRANDSON. 339 00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:04,488 THEN YOUR GRANDSON'S A BACKSTABBING LIAR! 340 00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,145 ALL RIGHT, THE BID STANDS AT $900! 341 00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:13,270 GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE... WHOO! $4,000! 342 00:16:14,273 --> 00:16:15,907 NO. NO. 343 00:16:15,942 --> 00:16:19,210 IRENE, THAT'S VERY GENEROUS OF YOU. 344 00:16:19,245 --> 00:16:24,749 GOING ONCE, GOING TWICE... NO! AAH! 345 00:16:24,784 --> 00:16:27,151 SOLD FOR $4,000! 346 00:16:27,187 --> 00:16:28,886 YES! 347 00:16:37,296 --> 00:16:43,935 MAN, I WAS WISHING I'D GET ONE OF THOSE OLD LADIES. 348 00:16:43,970 --> 00:16:48,039 YOU'RE WISHING THE WRONG GUY LUCK. 349 00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:50,574 PLEASE WELCOME OUR NEXT BACHELOR... 350 00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:52,877 DR. MICHAEL BERGEN. 351 00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:57,448 IT'S OKAY! 352 00:16:57,483 --> 00:16:59,550 SAVED THE OLIVE. 353 00:16:59,585 --> 00:17:06,423 OKAY, UM... BERG, AS HIS FRIENDS CALL HIM, 354 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:09,393 SAYS HE COULD HAVE BEEN A PROFESSIONAL BALLPLAYER, 355 00:17:09,428 --> 00:17:11,796 BUT DECIDED INSTEAD TO DEDICATE HIMSELF 356 00:17:11,831 --> 00:17:13,631 TO SAVING LIVES. 357 00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:17,935 OKAY! 358 00:17:17,971 --> 00:17:21,472 WHO WANTS TO START THE BIDDING AT $500? 359 00:17:21,507 --> 00:17:22,807 $500? 360 00:17:22,842 --> 00:17:24,341 COME ON, LADIES. 361 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:27,378 A ROMANTIC EVENING AT MY PLACE... 362 00:17:27,413 --> 00:17:34,451 CANDLELIGHT... MUSIC... SOFT FOOD. 363 00:17:34,487 --> 00:17:36,353 $500? 364 00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:37,588 $600. 365 00:17:37,623 --> 00:17:40,158 Berg, you can't bid on yourself. 366 00:17:40,193 --> 00:17:42,093 OKAY, IT'S ONLY $500. 367 00:17:46,166 --> 00:17:48,966 OH, I KNOW WHAT THEY WANT. 368 00:17:49,002 --> 00:17:52,436 DRUMROLL, PLEASE. 369 00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:05,749 WHO'D LIKE A BITE OF THIS GREEN APPLE? 370 00:18:05,785 --> 00:18:08,652 HA. HA. HA. HA. 371 00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:12,523 A SENSE OF HUMOR... NORMALLY VERY ATTRACTIVE IN A GUY. 372 00:18:12,558 --> 00:18:15,492 NOW DO I HEAR $400? 373 00:18:15,528 --> 00:18:17,862 $250? 374 00:18:17,897 --> 00:18:21,232 ANYTHING? 375 00:18:22,836 --> 00:18:24,535 LET'S REMEMBER WHY WE'RE HERE. 376 00:18:24,570 --> 00:18:27,338 IT'S A CHARITY, AND A CHARITY IS TO HELP PEOPLE 377 00:18:27,373 --> 00:18:29,440 THAT ARE LESS FORTUNATE THAN US, 378 00:18:29,475 --> 00:18:31,809 AND, BERG, PUT THE CAKE DOWN! 379 00:18:31,845 --> 00:18:34,511 LET ME HANDLE THIS. 380 00:18:34,547 --> 00:18:38,082 YOU KNOW... 381 00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:44,421 I MIGHT NOT BE... 382 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:51,428 THE PRIZED COW AT THE COUNTY FAIR. 383 00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:58,669 AND I KNOW THAT A LOT OF YOU DON'T THINK I'M WORTH SPIT. 384 00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:03,207 BUT... BUT I BEG TO DIFFER. 385 00:19:03,243 --> 00:19:09,480 I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I'M WORTH TONS OF SPIT. 386 00:19:09,515 --> 00:19:11,916 THERE. 387 00:19:11,951 --> 00:19:14,618 THAT'LL TEACH YOU. 388 00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:19,290 WELL, I GUESS THAT PUTS AN END TO THE BIDDING. 389 00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:21,425 $100. 390 00:19:21,460 --> 00:19:25,329 SOLD! 391 00:19:32,438 --> 00:19:35,439 THANK YOU, SIR. 392 00:19:40,446 --> 00:19:41,745 HEY, BERG. 393 00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:46,183 WILL YOU TAKE ME FOR A RIDE IN YOUR CAR? 394 00:19:46,219 --> 00:19:51,522 SURE, TOMORROW, AFTER I PLAY STICKBALL WITH PETE. 395 00:19:51,557 --> 00:19:53,590 SHARON, HAVE YOU SEEN PETE? 396 00:19:53,626 --> 00:19:55,459 I'VE LOOKED EVERYWHERE. 397 00:19:55,494 --> 00:19:57,128 OH, I'M SORRY, IRENE. 398 00:19:57,163 --> 00:19:59,763 HE LEFT JUST RIGHT AFTER THE AUCTION. 399 00:19:59,799 --> 00:20:02,400 IF HE WON'T TALK TO ME, I'M NOT PAYING. 400 00:20:02,435 --> 00:20:03,901 HE'S BEHIND THE BAR. 401 00:20:06,472 --> 00:20:10,074 SHARON, IRENE IS NOT BACK HERE... 402 00:20:10,109 --> 00:20:11,775 THERE YOU ARE! 403 00:20:11,811 --> 00:20:13,889 OH, GOODY! COME ON, PETE. 404 00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:16,458 I WANT TO DRIVE UP AND SEE MY PARENTS. 405 00:20:16,482 --> 00:20:19,116 THEY KEEP ASKING WHEN THEY'RE GOING TO MEET YOU. 406 00:20:19,152 --> 00:20:21,419 HOW SICK ARE THESE CHILDREN? 407 00:20:32,498 --> 00:20:36,834 WELL, I GUESS I'LL SEE YOU SATURDAY, THEN. 408 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:49,380 YOU DID A GREAT JOB TONIGHT, SHARON. 409 00:20:49,415 --> 00:20:51,582 THANK YOU. WE RAISED A LOT OF MONEY. 410 00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:53,784 THAT'S THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME 411 00:20:53,819 --> 00:20:56,387 THAT I ACTUALLY FEEL GOOD ABOUT MYSELF. 412 00:20:56,422 --> 00:20:59,090 I JUST WANT TO APOLOGIZE FOR MY BEHAVIOR. 413 00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:00,424 IT'S OKAY, BERG. 414 00:21:00,460 --> 00:21:02,093 I KNOW DEEP IN MY HEART 415 00:21:02,128 --> 00:21:05,429 YOU'RE GOING TO FIND SOMEBODY THAT'S JUST PERFECT FOR YOU. 416 00:21:05,465 --> 00:21:08,099 YEAH, WE'LL SEE HOW SATURDAY GOES. 417 00:21:14,740 --> 00:21:18,709 Captions by VITAC... www.vitac.com 418 00:21:18,744 --> 00:21:21,845 CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 27123

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