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1
00:02:11,483 --> 00:02:15,476
"I, Edwin Dennis,
being of sound mind and body...
2
00:02:15,654 --> 00:02:20,648
...do hereby bequeath to my only son,
Patrick, all my worldly possessions.
3
00:02:20,826 --> 00:02:25,763
In the event of my demise, I direct
Norah Muldoon to deliver Patrick...
4
00:02:25,931 --> 00:02:30,630
...to my sister, Mame Dennis,
at 3 Beekman Place, New York City.
5
00:02:30,802 --> 00:02:34,636
His expenses shall be supervised
by Mr. Dwight Babcock...
6
00:02:34,806 --> 00:02:37,366
...acting for
the Knickerbocker Bank...
7
00:02:37,542 --> 00:02:40,306
...with the power
to keep my crazy sister...
8
00:02:40,478 --> 00:02:45,415
...from doing anything too eccentric
and bringing him up to be like her.
9
00:02:45,584 --> 00:02:50,647
Since I am in splendid condition
through workouts at the Brokers Club...
10
00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:55,953
...I am confident that these provisions
won't go into effect for years.
11
00:02:56,127 --> 00:03:01,895
I hereby affix my hand this fourteenth
day of September, in the year 1928."
12
00:03:13,578 --> 00:03:17,378
You've been reading it for a week.
Why bring it to New York?
13
00:03:17,549 --> 00:03:19,881
It's the only way I can believe it.
14
00:03:20,051 --> 00:03:25,421
Besides, your Aunt Mame may like it as
a remembrance of your sainted father.
15
00:03:25,590 --> 00:03:31,187
Don't you be going by way of
the North Pole. We're not greenhorns.
16
00:03:47,078 --> 00:03:51,742
- That's 95 cents.
- Here's a dollar. Keep the change.
17
00:04:12,337 --> 00:04:16,034
It's like the ladies' restroom
in the Oriental Theater.
18
00:04:21,813 --> 00:04:25,146
You're not scared, are you, Norah?
19
00:04:25,317 --> 00:04:30,949
Of course not! And don't you be, child.
Norah's here to look after you.
20
00:04:36,261 --> 00:04:38,957
Saints alive!
21
00:04:39,197 --> 00:04:44,260
- You want?
- Is this the residence of Mame Dennis?
22
00:04:44,436 --> 00:04:46,631
Mame Dennis. Oh, yes!
23
00:04:46,805 --> 00:04:50,138
I'm Norah Muldoon.
I'm bringing Dennis to his aunt.
24
00:04:50,308 --> 00:04:53,573
Oh, you come in. You wait. I fetch.
25
00:04:53,745 --> 00:04:57,272
Madam having affair now.
26
00:05:16,801 --> 00:05:19,361
Isn't he wonderful?
27
00:05:33,318 --> 00:05:36,515
Help is on the way, darlings.
28
00:05:39,724 --> 00:05:43,626
That adorable bootlegger is
on his way with a gallon of gin.
29
00:05:43,795 --> 00:05:47,663
Oh, Allen, darling!
Edna, I called you yesterday.
30
00:05:47,832 --> 00:05:50,801
- Hello, Mame.
- I'll be with you in a minute.
31
00:05:50,969 --> 00:05:57,397
- Vladimir, what are you doing here?
- Drinking myself to death, of course.
32
00:05:57,575 --> 00:06:00,043
Besides, I'm your guest of honor.
33
00:06:00,211 --> 00:06:04,739
Of course! You must hear
his new symphony, the pastorale.
34
00:06:04,916 --> 00:06:08,909
It has real airplane motors
and live sheep. It's devastating.
35
00:06:09,087 --> 00:06:12,352
You've met our guest of honor,
Vladimir Klinkoff? Miss...
36
00:06:12,524 --> 00:06:15,322
Mrs. Klinkoff.
37
00:06:15,493 --> 00:06:18,621
Yes, of course. Then you've met.
Oh, Perry!
38
00:06:18,797 --> 00:06:21,425
Doris, now where are you off to?
39
00:06:21,599 --> 00:06:24,796
Everyone's going to Clifton's.
It's nearly 7.
40
00:06:24,969 --> 00:06:27,665
Give Clifton my love.
I'll be right over...
41
00:06:27,839 --> 00:06:32,776
Oh, dear. The employment bureau didn't
tell me you were bringing a child.
42
00:06:32,944 --> 00:06:37,108
He looks nice. If he misbehaves,
we can toss him in the river.
43
00:06:37,282 --> 00:06:40,479
Please let us escape
from this den of criminals.
44
00:06:40,652 --> 00:06:44,315
Doctor, get this woman
on your couch in a hurry!
45
00:06:44,489 --> 00:06:49,358
I'm not that kind of a woman.
I'm looking for a Miss Mame Dennis.
46
00:06:49,527 --> 00:06:51,256
- Ito! lto!
- Yes, missy.
47
00:06:51,429 --> 00:06:55,160
Show this woman to the kitchen,
start her on glasses.
48
00:06:55,333 --> 00:07:00,100
- This not dishwashing lady.
- Then I must have invited you. A drink?
49
00:07:00,271 --> 00:07:05,641
I'm Norah Muldoon. Didn't you get
my telegram saying we'd arrive at 6:00?
50
00:07:05,810 --> 00:07:11,305
No, your telegram said October 1.
That's tomorrow. This is September 31.
51
00:07:11,483 --> 00:07:14,316
No, 'tis the first,
curse the evil day.
52
00:07:14,486 --> 00:07:19,014
Everybody knows 30 days has
September, April, June and...
53
00:07:19,190 --> 00:07:24,651
But, darling, I'm your Auntie Mame!
54
00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:30,293
Quiet, everybody. I have an
important announcement to make.
55
00:07:30,468 --> 00:07:36,407
This is my little boy!
56
00:07:36,574 --> 00:07:40,340
He's not really my little boy.
He's my late brother's son.
57
00:07:40,512 --> 00:07:45,848
My only living relative. That's all we
have, just each other, my little love!
58
00:07:46,017 --> 00:07:48,918
Well, what am I going
to call you, dear?
59
00:07:49,087 --> 00:07:52,352
- Pat. Patrick Dennis.
- I know the Dennis part.
60
00:07:52,524 --> 00:07:58,156
And from now on, you must call me
Auntie Mame. Well, well, well, now.
61
00:07:58,329 --> 00:08:00,320
Would you like a mar...? No.
62
00:08:00,498 --> 00:08:04,127
Is it your bedtime? No, it can't be.
The powder room?
63
00:08:04,302 --> 00:08:09,831
Food, food! That's it! You must be
famished. Come right along with me.
64
00:08:12,977 --> 00:08:17,710
Take your shoes off, darling.
It's like removing your hat in America.
65
00:08:25,657 --> 00:08:28,285
Before sukiyaki,
a little hors d'oeuvre.
66
00:08:28,459 --> 00:08:30,757
- Could I try some of that jam?
- Jam?
67
00:08:30,929 --> 00:08:33,420
- That blackberry jam?
- Of course.
68
00:08:33,598 --> 00:08:38,433
Actually, it's sort of a fishberry jam.
It's called caviar.
69
00:08:38,603 --> 00:08:42,972
Now, some pickled octopus,
raw fish tails...
70
00:08:43,141 --> 00:08:47,373
- It's salty, but I like it.
- Good. You have wonderful taste.
71
00:08:49,180 --> 00:08:50,772
Vera!
72
00:08:53,017 --> 00:08:59,581
Vera, this is my little boy.
Patrick, I want you to meet a star.
73
00:08:59,757 --> 00:09:04,251
A great lady of the theater
and my dearest friend, Vera Charles.
74
00:09:04,429 --> 00:09:06,454
- Hello!
- How do you do?
75
00:09:06,631 --> 00:09:10,294
She just loves little boys.
76
00:09:13,705 --> 00:09:16,538
- Who's he?
- That's a Lithuanian bishop.
77
00:09:16,708 --> 00:09:21,805
Doesn't speak a word of English.
Stimulating man! Oh, Your Grace.
78
00:09:21,980 --> 00:09:25,177
He's a darling and so worldly
for a man of God.
79
00:09:25,350 --> 00:09:29,616
Everything in the universe is composed
of the elements of Aristotle.
80
00:09:29,887 --> 00:09:34,654
Thus man is fire, dust and air
mingled with water.
81
00:09:34,826 --> 00:09:38,159
Acacius, darling,
this is my nephew Patrick.
82
00:09:38,329 --> 00:09:41,696
This is Mr. Page, dear.
83
00:09:41,866 --> 00:09:45,529
That means "Know thyself."
Mr. Page is an educator.
84
00:09:45,703 --> 00:09:49,230
He runs a school where
they do advanced things.
85
00:09:49,407 --> 00:09:52,205
You think you might
find room for Patrick?
86
00:09:52,377 --> 00:09:57,974
For him, yes! In this boy,
I see already the fire, dust and air.
87
00:09:58,149 --> 00:10:01,243
Add water and stir.
Would you want to go there?
88
00:10:01,419 --> 00:10:05,355
- Do they wear uniforms?
- At my school, we wear nothing.
89
00:10:05,523 --> 00:10:09,823
It's heaven! lt'll stimulate
his psyche and stir up his libido.
90
00:10:09,994 --> 00:10:13,191
- What's libido?
- It's perfectly simple. It...
91
00:10:13,364 --> 00:10:15,662
I'll tell you what we'll do.
92
00:10:16,034 --> 00:10:21,233
Every time you hear a word you don't
understand, dear, write it down.
93
00:10:21,406 --> 00:10:23,306
Later, I will explain it.
94
00:10:23,474 --> 00:10:28,173
- I'm off, Mame.
- Lindsay! Lindsay, this is Patrick.
95
00:10:28,346 --> 00:10:32,282
Patrick, I want you to meet
Lindsay Woolsey, the publisher.
96
00:10:32,450 --> 00:10:36,784
- Circulate, darling. Circulate!
- New man in your life?
97
00:10:36,954 --> 00:10:39,923
Little Patrick!
Guess I won't see much of you.
98
00:10:40,091 --> 00:10:43,492
We'll go to the zoo,
the aquarium, the Philharmonic.
99
00:10:43,661 --> 00:10:46,562
We'll be together constantly,
the three of us!
100
00:10:46,731 --> 00:10:49,461
That's exactly what I had in mind.
101
00:10:49,634 --> 00:10:52,660
- Good night, Mame. Thanks.
- Watch it, Phyllis.
102
00:10:52,837 --> 00:10:55,237
- Some party!
- So good of you to come.
103
00:10:55,406 --> 00:10:58,807
You played beautifully.
I can't thank you enough.
104
00:10:59,577 --> 00:11:02,307
Goodbye, Mrs...
105
00:11:05,016 --> 00:11:08,281
Of course.
There you are, my little love.
106
00:11:08,453 --> 00:11:12,082
Come here with your Auntie Mame
and sit down a minute.
107
00:11:12,256 --> 00:11:15,692
We'll really get to know each other.
108
00:11:18,162 --> 00:11:21,962
Well, now, read me all the words
you don't understand.
109
00:11:22,133 --> 00:11:27,230
"Libido, inferiority complex,
stinko, blotto...
110
00:11:27,405 --> 00:11:30,033
...free love, bathtub gin...
111
00:11:30,208 --> 00:11:35,202
...monkey glands, Karl Marx."
Is he one of the Marx Brothers?
112
00:11:35,380 --> 00:11:36,642
No, dear.
113
00:11:36,814 --> 00:11:40,750
She last pretty good tonight.
Marie Antoinette room again?
114
00:11:40,918 --> 00:11:43,751
Yes. Perhaps she'll wake up
without a head.
115
00:11:43,921 --> 00:11:48,585
- Get that dog of a dress off her.
- Me tuck her in.
116
00:11:50,395 --> 00:11:52,363
Is the English lady sick?
117
00:11:52,530 --> 00:11:54,998
She's not English.
She's from Pittsburgh.
118
00:11:55,166 --> 00:11:58,431
- She sounded English.
- She has to do something.
119
00:11:58,603 --> 00:12:00,002
Now, where were we?
120
00:12:00,171 --> 00:12:04,301
"Narcississistic, Lysissistrata...
121
00:12:04,475 --> 00:12:09,003
...cubism, squiffed,
neurotic, heterosexual."
122
00:12:09,180 --> 00:12:13,276
My, what an eager mind!
You won't need these words for months.
123
00:12:13,451 --> 00:12:17,387
Your vocabulary needs work.
Didn't your father talk to you?
124
00:12:17,555 --> 00:12:21,252
- I only saw him at breakfast.
- What did he say then?
125
00:12:21,426 --> 00:12:25,760
He usually said, "Pipe down, kid.
The old man's hung."
126
00:12:25,930 --> 00:12:29,798
That's succinct.
What did you do in Chicago for fun?
127
00:12:29,967 --> 00:12:33,835
Norah took me to the movies
every Saturday afternoon.
128
00:12:34,005 --> 00:12:37,634
I played Parcheesi with the doorman,
until he got fired.
129
00:12:37,809 --> 00:12:41,768
Didn't they do anything cultural
for you? Well, never mind!
130
00:12:41,946 --> 00:12:45,211
Your Auntie Mame will open doors
for you.
131
00:12:45,383 --> 00:12:50,446
Doors you never even dreamed existed.
What times we'll have!
132
00:12:50,621 --> 00:12:53,954
Now, what on earth did I do
with that will?
133
00:12:54,125 --> 00:12:59,222
Now, it's here someplace.
Here we are!
134
00:12:59,397 --> 00:13:04,664
Now, "Get mahjong lesson, hair done."
That can't be it. Yes, it is it!
135
00:13:04,836 --> 00:13:07,430
Oh, dear. This is a legal document.
136
00:13:07,605 --> 00:13:10,870
A lot of folderol about
the Knickerbocker Bank...
137
00:13:11,042 --> 00:13:13,875
...and some Mr. Babcock,
your trustee...
138
00:13:14,145 --> 00:13:19,583
Oh, I see! I have the responsibility
and your trustee has the authority.
139
00:13:19,750 --> 00:13:22,810
Norah took me to a movie once
about a trustee.
140
00:13:22,987 --> 00:13:27,185
There was a prison break.
A trustee saved the warden's daughter.
141
00:13:27,358 --> 00:13:31,818
This isn't the kind of trustee
that lives in a prison. As a rule.
142
00:13:31,996 --> 00:13:34,430
We'll tackle him
in our own good time.
143
00:13:34,599 --> 00:13:38,729
Now, Patrick, is your Auntie Mame
anything like you expected?
144
00:13:38,903 --> 00:13:44,068
No. The only picture I saw of you was
with a shawl and a rose in your teeth.
145
00:13:44,242 --> 00:13:47,211
Like a Spanish lady.
It's in my suitcase.
146
00:13:47,378 --> 00:13:51,371
Didn't your father tell you
anything about me before he died?
147
00:13:51,549 --> 00:13:55,178
- Yes, ma'am.
- Well, what was it?
148
00:13:56,888 --> 00:14:00,153
Come now, my little love.
149
00:14:00,324 --> 00:14:04,158
You must always be frank
with your Auntie Mame.
150
00:14:04,629 --> 00:14:08,998
Well, my father said, since you're
my only living relative...
151
00:14:09,166 --> 00:14:13,364
...I might be living
with you someday, and...
152
00:14:14,138 --> 00:14:15,332
Well?
153
00:14:16,307 --> 00:14:22,177
But that to be left in your hands was
a fate he wouldn't wish on a dog.
154
00:14:22,613 --> 00:14:24,376
That...
155
00:14:26,117 --> 00:14:27,607
What's that?
156
00:14:27,785 --> 00:14:32,779
That is a B. The first letter of a
7-letter word that means your father.
157
00:14:32,957 --> 00:14:35,983
Come, child,
I'll show you to your room.
158
00:14:36,260 --> 00:14:40,594
It's a cozy little nook. My loom is
by the window. Do you weave?
159
00:14:40,765 --> 00:14:45,429
You can sit at it. I have instructions
from a descendant of Pocahontas.
160
00:14:45,603 --> 00:14:50,097
I began with an enormous rug.
It's that bell pull by the fireplace.
161
00:14:50,274 --> 00:14:52,265
Your own little den.
162
00:14:52,944 --> 00:14:57,540
How stupid of me.
I gave up weaving for sculpture.
163
00:14:57,715 --> 00:15:01,651
That is, a sculptor friend
used this room for six months.
164
00:15:01,819 --> 00:15:05,983
A divine man! Such talented fingers,
but what he did to my bust.
165
00:15:06,157 --> 00:15:08,523
That's the head, you know.
166
00:15:09,026 --> 00:15:12,393
I guess it's not quite ready yet.
167
00:15:12,597 --> 00:15:18,058
The Marie Antoinette room! No, Vera's
there. You better camp out with me.
168
00:15:18,469 --> 00:15:22,371
Shall we try this out for size?
169
00:15:25,343 --> 00:15:29,211
- Perfect! Shall we...?
- I'll do it.
170
00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:34,340
- Sheets. Where were the sheets...?
- When will you be home from the party?
171
00:15:34,518 --> 00:15:38,147
What makes you think
I'm going to any party?
172
00:16:45,122 --> 00:16:49,115
Just as I was getting used to
all them dragons. What is it?
173
00:16:49,293 --> 00:16:52,888
Don't ask me. I didn't paint it.
Can I get in her room?
174
00:16:53,064 --> 00:16:57,160
At 2:00? You'll be lucky
to get in by 5. She's sleeping.
175
00:16:57,334 --> 00:16:59,996
- I'll start in the other room.
- Can't!
176
00:17:00,171 --> 00:17:02,366
She's sleeping in two bedrooms?
177
00:17:02,540 --> 00:17:07,671
No. It's the first lady of American
theater out cold in the guest room.
178
00:17:07,845 --> 00:17:10,143
Again? What does she do, live here?
179
00:17:10,314 --> 00:17:14,341
She don't live here. She drinks
and does her passing out here.
180
00:17:14,518 --> 00:17:17,487
It's a wonder their blood
hasn't turned to vinegar.
181
00:17:17,655 --> 00:17:20,749
In two weeks,
they've had 13 cocktail parties.
182
00:17:20,925 --> 00:17:22,654
Only 13 in two weeks?
183
00:17:22,827 --> 00:17:27,423
They had to call one off.
The bootlegger couldn't come that day.
184
00:17:33,237 --> 00:17:35,432
Auntie Mame! Auntie Mame!
185
00:17:37,641 --> 00:17:40,667
What is it? What happened?
186
00:17:40,845 --> 00:17:44,941
I've got something to show you.
Look!
187
00:17:45,683 --> 00:17:47,480
Bats!
188
00:17:47,785 --> 00:17:52,552
I built it. It has a rubber-band motor.
I built the body out of wood.
189
00:17:52,723 --> 00:17:56,591
Please, darling,
your Auntie Mame is hung.
190
00:18:00,164 --> 00:18:02,394
Sure, Auntie Mame.
191
00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:07,398
- Sure.
- Patrick, Patrick, come back.
192
00:18:07,571 --> 00:18:11,063
You know, I really am
interested in all your projects.
193
00:18:11,242 --> 00:18:14,905
Child, how can you see
with all that light?
194
00:18:17,548 --> 00:18:21,848
That's better. Be an angel
and tell lto to bring me breakfast.
195
00:18:22,019 --> 00:18:26,479
Black coffee and a sidecar.
And a cold towel for Auntie Vera.
196
00:18:26,657 --> 00:18:31,560
- Is she in the guest room again?
- Since Sunday. Run along, darling.
197
00:18:31,729 --> 00:18:35,927
First, come and give your Auntie Mame
a good morning kiss.
198
00:18:36,100 --> 00:18:38,898
Gently, darling, gently.
199
00:18:39,603 --> 00:18:44,063
That was lovely.
I really am fascinated by aviation.
200
00:18:44,241 --> 00:18:48,575
I never knew before
they did it all with rubber bands.
201
00:18:53,584 --> 00:18:56,985
Miss Dennis? Yes, she's here.
Who's calling, please?
202
00:18:57,154 --> 00:18:59,520
- Mr. Babcock.
- Hold the wire.
203
00:18:59,690 --> 00:19:03,751
- It's Mr. Babcock, from the bank.
- I've been dodging him for days.
204
00:19:03,928 --> 00:19:10,026
Well, hello, Mr. Babcock. How nice
to hear your voice at long last.
205
00:19:10,201 --> 00:19:14,160
I too am looking forward
with anticipation to meeting you.
206
00:19:14,338 --> 00:19:17,569
The little lad is fine.
He can't wait to meet you.
207
00:19:17,741 --> 00:19:20,801
Hurry, my tray, darling!
Auntie needs fuel.
208
00:19:20,978 --> 00:19:24,573
Do drop over anytime, Mr. Babcock.
209
00:19:24,982 --> 00:19:27,348
In how many minutes?
210
00:19:29,086 --> 00:19:34,388
Yes, 57th Street is right
in my neck of the woods.
211
00:19:35,125 --> 00:19:37,616
Spitting distance?
212
00:19:38,329 --> 00:19:42,459
How vivid. Come right along, then.
You can join me for tea.
213
00:19:42,633 --> 00:19:49,038
That's right, number 3 Beekman Place.
Right away. Vera! Vera!
214
00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:55,473
Vera! Vera! I am about to be attacked
by the Knickerbocker Bank.
215
00:19:55,813 --> 00:19:59,112
- That's lovely.
- Vera!
216
00:19:59,283 --> 00:20:03,913
Why'd that Oriental sandman
let me sleep in my best Chanel?
217
00:20:04,088 --> 00:20:06,022
He tried but you bit him.
218
00:20:06,190 --> 00:20:08,988
Patrick's trustee,
some hideous man...
219
00:20:09,159 --> 00:20:14,119
...is about to descend upon me
like a vulture and rob me of my child.
220
00:20:14,298 --> 00:20:17,597
He's coming here?
In the middle of the night?
221
00:20:17,768 --> 00:20:20,931
That moon's bright!
222
00:20:21,105 --> 00:20:25,132
Stop being silly. I have got
to make the right impression!
223
00:20:25,309 --> 00:20:30,372
The Knickerbocker Bank is so
conservative, they don't pay interest.
224
00:20:30,547 --> 00:20:36,349
All right! Let's get organized.
What time is it, and what day is it?
225
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:39,011
I was due at the theater guild.
226
00:20:39,189 --> 00:20:42,852
You can't desert me in my predicament.
What will I wear?
227
00:20:43,027 --> 00:20:47,054
- How can I face the guild?
- Will this make me look Scarsdale?
228
00:20:47,231 --> 00:20:51,930
- Have you ever been to Scarsdale?
- Good afternoon, Aunt Vera.
229
00:20:52,102 --> 00:20:55,435
Do Lillian Gish.
Simple dress, Madonna-like hairdo.
230
00:20:55,606 --> 00:21:00,270
Madonna-like hairdo. That's it.
A switch! A switch!
231
00:21:00,444 --> 00:21:02,639
- You got one?
- Dozens.
232
00:21:02,813 --> 00:21:07,113
- Do you throw anything away?
- I may go back to one of these colors.
233
00:21:07,284 --> 00:21:13,052
- lf you kept your hair natural as l...
- I'd be bald! Pick one close to mine.
234
00:21:13,223 --> 00:21:19,253
Try this. You need a dress like I wore
as Lady... That's stunning!
235
00:21:19,430 --> 00:21:22,263
It's my new dress.
I haven't had it on yet.
236
00:21:22,433 --> 00:21:26,563
I won't put $500 on my back
for that awful man. A suit will do.
237
00:21:26,737 --> 00:21:30,229
- Hold it so I can braid it like a halo.
- I've got to go.
238
00:21:30,407 --> 00:21:34,844
I can't let him see you. He'll think
I run a house for wanton women.
239
00:21:35,012 --> 00:21:38,243
- I'll wear your mink.
- Over my dead body!
240
00:21:38,415 --> 00:21:40,610
This dress is heaven.
241
00:21:40,784 --> 00:21:45,778
You know, green suits me.
I think I'll phone up Maggie.
242
00:21:45,956 --> 00:21:49,289
Put this on my head. Hurry!
No matter how it looks.
243
00:21:49,460 --> 00:21:52,122
- I've got to go.
- Don't you dare leave me!
244
00:21:52,296 --> 00:21:57,700
- You could care less about my career...
- Not already! Norah, lto, the door!
245
00:21:57,868 --> 00:22:00,803
I've gotta get out before he gets in.
246
00:22:01,205 --> 00:22:03,765
I can't leave him down in the foyer!
247
00:22:03,941 --> 00:22:05,636
That's the third time!
248
00:22:05,809 --> 00:22:09,870
- Be my friend for five minutes.
- I've been a friend!
249
00:22:10,047 --> 00:22:12,982
Go down and make
Mr. Babcock feel at home.
250
00:22:13,150 --> 00:22:14,981
But the theater guild!
251
00:22:15,152 --> 00:22:19,748
Get out of my way! What am I gonna
do with this damn stinking halo?
252
00:22:30,300 --> 00:22:31,961
You want?
253
00:22:32,136 --> 00:22:35,697
I'm Mr. Babcock.
Miss Dennis is expecting me.
254
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:39,437
- You come in.
- Thank you.
255
00:22:39,643 --> 00:22:43,010
- I take coat?
- Thank you. Thank you.
256
00:22:49,553 --> 00:22:52,545
- You sit.
- Thank you.
257
00:22:53,457 --> 00:22:59,327
Mr. Babcock? We've been expecting you.
My name is Patrick Dennis.
258
00:22:59,496 --> 00:23:02,932
- Please sit down.
- Fine. Fine.
259
00:23:13,043 --> 00:23:15,841
Auntie Mame will be right down.
260
00:23:16,013 --> 00:23:19,505
She's having a little trouble
with her halo.
261
00:23:19,950 --> 00:23:22,612
She'll be right down.
262
00:23:28,625 --> 00:23:32,789
You look like a bully little chap.
263
00:23:32,963 --> 00:23:35,625
Yes, sir, a bully little chap.
264
00:23:35,799 --> 00:23:40,099
- You look very bully too.
- Yes.
265
00:23:42,206 --> 00:23:46,506
Would you care
for a martini, Mr. Babcock?
266
00:23:47,344 --> 00:23:50,006
Dry or extra dry?
267
00:23:51,081 --> 00:23:56,280
Sit down, please. I'll make them
like I do for Mr. Woolcott.
268
00:24:15,572 --> 00:24:19,303
Stir, never shake. Bruises the gin.
269
00:24:43,767 --> 00:24:45,962
Would you care for an olive?
270
00:24:46,136 --> 00:24:51,164
Auntie Mame says olives take up
too much room in such a little glass.
271
00:24:54,878 --> 00:24:56,937
Why, Mr. Babcock!
272
00:24:58,081 --> 00:25:02,017
What an honor it is
to have you in our little home.
273
00:25:02,186 --> 00:25:07,180
I wonder if it makes the best first
impression on a sensitive young mind...
274
00:25:07,357 --> 00:25:10,417
...to see you drinking
during business hours.
275
00:25:10,594 --> 00:25:14,189
- But he...
- I won't breathe a word to the bank.
276
00:25:14,364 --> 00:25:17,333
Just one minute.
Where did he learn to mix...?
277
00:25:17,501 --> 00:25:20,800
Mr. Babcock, knowledge is power.
278
00:25:20,971 --> 00:25:26,807
That is exactly what I'm here for.
To discuss this boy's proper education.
279
00:25:26,977 --> 00:25:28,945
Nuts?
280
00:25:29,947 --> 00:25:32,609
- No, thank you.
- Won't you sit down?
281
00:25:32,783 --> 00:25:37,652
He won't have to worry about his
future. His money is in steady bonds.
282
00:25:37,821 --> 00:25:43,282
You'll agree that it's time he be
enrolled in an institution of learning.
283
00:25:43,460 --> 00:25:47,055
- I'm already enrolled in...
- Let Mr. Babcock talk.
284
00:25:47,231 --> 00:25:52,897
I've gone to pains to gather information
on some better boys' schools in town.
285
00:25:53,070 --> 00:25:56,471
- I prefer coeducational schools.
- What do you mean?
286
00:25:56,640 --> 00:26:01,839
Coeducational means when boys
and girls go to school together.
287
00:26:02,012 --> 00:26:05,812
First, the Bixby School
which is known to be splendid.
288
00:26:05,983 --> 00:26:09,316
Have you considered a school
run by Acacius Page?
289
00:26:09,486 --> 00:26:12,148
It follows ancient Greek principles...
290
00:26:12,322 --> 00:26:17,282
Your brother's will was most specific.
Conservative schooling, he said.
291
00:26:17,461 --> 00:26:20,624
There's my alma mater,
St. Boniface in Massachusetts.
292
00:26:20,797 --> 00:26:22,128
It's too far.
293
00:26:22,299 --> 00:26:25,291
You'd better settle
on the Browning School.
294
00:26:25,469 --> 00:26:31,305
It is known to be conservative
and this gives the boys basic...
295
00:26:36,847 --> 00:26:39,782
- That's enough candy, dear.
- Sorry.
296
00:26:39,950 --> 00:26:44,319
Not you, Mr. Babcock.
You can have all you want.
297
00:26:44,554 --> 00:26:48,046
Have you thought of
the Dillman School? It's here...
298
00:26:48,225 --> 00:26:52,958
Too experimental. You wanna keep
the riffraff out of the boy's life.
299
00:26:53,130 --> 00:26:56,588
The school must be exclusive
and restricted.
300
00:26:57,000 --> 00:27:00,766
Exclusively what
and restricted to whom?
301
00:27:01,271 --> 00:27:04,434
We must spare the boy
certain influences...
302
00:27:04,608 --> 00:27:08,237
...from the wrong side of the tracks,
shall we say?
303
00:27:09,646 --> 00:27:12,376
- Mr. Babbitt...
- Babcock.
304
00:27:12,549 --> 00:27:17,248
- Yes. It was very good of you to come.
- What school will it be?
305
00:27:17,421 --> 00:27:21,118
Name the school, and Patrick
and I will know what to do.
306
00:27:21,291 --> 00:27:24,852
- I'd say Bixby.
- Then bully for Bixby.
307
00:27:25,028 --> 00:27:28,759
I'll make out a check to Bixby School.
You register him.
308
00:27:28,932 --> 00:27:31,457
Whatever you say.
309
00:27:31,635 --> 00:27:34,604
I say I'm very happy to have met you.
310
00:27:34,771 --> 00:27:39,367
After the reports I'd heard,
I was prejudiced, and not in your favor.
311
00:27:39,543 --> 00:27:44,640
But I find you a woman
with a very powerful charm.
312
00:27:44,815 --> 00:27:49,184
And you're a man
with a very powerful bank.
313
00:27:50,354 --> 00:27:54,051
Floor all scrubbed.
Clean just like old country.
314
00:27:54,224 --> 00:27:57,751
I go now. Get lamb chops,
bottle of milk for boy.
315
00:27:57,928 --> 00:28:00,192
- Pick up my coat!
- Bye, Aunt Vera!
316
00:28:00,364 --> 00:28:02,389
Bye, kid!
317
00:28:48,111 --> 00:28:53,674
Don't drop anything. What a marvelous
day! October's bright, blue weather.
318
00:28:53,850 --> 00:28:57,980
All we've seen was the store.
Haven't even called my office.
319
00:28:58,155 --> 00:29:01,249
Oh, stop complaining, Lindsay.
320
00:29:01,658 --> 00:29:04,525
When are we going
to have time to ourselves?
321
00:29:04,694 --> 00:29:10,655
I've had to make up Patrick's 10
neglected years in a matter of months.
322
00:29:10,834 --> 00:29:12,995
Dr. Spock says it's impossible.
323
00:29:13,170 --> 00:29:16,628
Does Dr. Spock mention
that a child needs a father?
324
00:29:16,807 --> 00:29:20,038
There are a lot of women
who think I'm attractive.
325
00:29:20,210 --> 00:29:24,647
Don't start that! How can I be a wife?
I'm too busy being a mother.
326
00:29:26,917 --> 00:29:30,876
Oh, I forgot. One moment!
Thank you.
327
00:29:31,054 --> 00:29:34,353
My hat! Thank you.
328
00:29:34,524 --> 00:29:40,190
I hope Patrick likes the chemistry set,
the books, the atlas, the Kipling.
329
00:29:40,363 --> 00:29:43,560
- I don't like your latest fad.
- Fad? Patrick?
330
00:29:43,733 --> 00:29:47,499
I've seen you through yogi,
sculpture, dance and foods.
331
00:29:47,671 --> 00:29:51,664
You take each as if nothing else
existed. Then you drop them.
332
00:29:51,842 --> 00:29:54,606
You think he's a temporary enthusiasm?
333
00:29:54,778 --> 00:29:59,340
- It's called "molding a new life."
- You've been in some mood.
334
00:29:59,516 --> 00:30:04,453
- You deceitful, irresponsible bohemian!
- Whatever do you mean?
335
00:30:04,621 --> 00:30:08,250
- You're not fit to raise a child!
- Something's happened?
336
00:30:08,425 --> 00:30:09,949
Come here, you heathen!
337
00:30:10,126 --> 00:30:12,617
- What's wrong?
- He came to my school...
338
00:30:12,796 --> 00:30:16,926
I dropped by the Bixby School
and what did I find?
339
00:30:17,100 --> 00:30:19,568
I find he isn't even registered!
340
00:30:19,736 --> 00:30:22,705
I hunted through
every low, crackpot school.
341
00:30:22,873 --> 00:30:26,866
- I found him in the lowest of them.
- Mr. Page is progressive.
342
00:30:27,043 --> 00:30:29,511
There they were!
A room full of them!
343
00:30:29,679 --> 00:30:35,481
Boys, girls, teachers, romping around
naked, bare as the day they were born.
344
00:30:35,652 --> 00:30:40,521
The children were engaged in
normal, healthful, broadening pursuits.
345
00:30:40,690 --> 00:30:44,683
Broadening? Show them what
you were doing when I broke in.
346
00:30:44,861 --> 00:30:48,991
We were playing fish families.
It's part of constructive play.
347
00:30:49,165 --> 00:30:50,996
- Listen to this.
- Show me.
348
00:30:51,167 --> 00:30:53,499
We do it right after yogurt time.
349
00:30:53,670 --> 00:30:57,970
Mrs. Page and all the girls
crouch down under the sun lamps...
350
00:30:58,141 --> 00:31:02,475
...pretending to be lady fishes
depositing their eggs in the sand.
351
00:31:02,646 --> 00:31:07,276
Then Mr. Page and all the boys
do what gentlemen fish do.
352
00:31:07,450 --> 00:31:10,351
What could be more wholesome
or natural?
353
00:31:10,554 --> 00:31:14,251
Natural? Well, it might
be natural for a sardine!
354
00:31:14,991 --> 00:31:18,586
Mr. Babcock, I consider
your behavior most undignified.
355
00:31:18,795 --> 00:31:21,457
Undignified? At least I wear a vest.
356
00:31:21,631 --> 00:31:26,625
Making a scene. Causing
a traumatic experience for this child.
357
00:31:26,803 --> 00:31:31,399
I know how you twist things around.
I'm getting out of this nudist camp...
358
00:31:31,575 --> 00:31:35,306
...before you make me look
like the president of free love.
359
00:31:35,512 --> 00:31:40,245
Mr. Babcock,
not in front of the B-O-Y.
360
00:31:41,751 --> 00:31:46,188
Tomorrow morning I'm taking
this kid off to boarding school.
361
00:31:46,389 --> 00:31:49,290
I am placing him
in St. Boniface Academy.
362
00:31:49,492 --> 00:31:52,586
You'll only get him
Christmas and summer.
363
00:31:52,796 --> 00:31:56,357
- I wish I could stop you from that!
- Do I have to?
364
00:31:56,533 --> 00:32:01,232
- Please, I'll do whatever you say.
- Not on your life! He goes tomorrow.
365
00:32:01,404 --> 00:32:05,568
- Let's be reasonable.
- I'll make him a decent Christian...
366
00:32:05,742 --> 00:32:07,869
...if I have to break his bones.
367
00:32:08,044 --> 00:32:09,705
Give me another chance.
368
00:32:09,879 --> 00:32:14,145
I wouldn't give you the time
after the double-cross you pulled.
369
00:32:14,317 --> 00:32:16,581
But he's all that I have!
370
00:32:16,786 --> 00:32:23,055
Have him ready at 8:00 sharp tomorrow.
Kid, you'd better be wearing knickers!
371
00:32:26,830 --> 00:32:32,962
I want to stay with you, Auntie Mame.
I don't want go to St. Bony-face.
372
00:32:33,503 --> 00:32:35,494
Now, hush.
373
00:32:35,705 --> 00:32:38,469
Hush, my little love.
374
00:32:42,412 --> 00:32:46,075
I'm sure St. Boniface
is really very nice.
375
00:32:49,152 --> 00:32:52,280
You go upstairs now, dear...
376
00:32:52,956 --> 00:32:55,151
...and get ready for dinner.
377
00:32:55,358 --> 00:32:58,156
We'll talk about it later.
378
00:33:18,381 --> 00:33:20,349
Lindsay.
379
00:33:20,684 --> 00:33:23,778
Lindsay, what am I going to do?
380
00:33:25,055 --> 00:33:27,683
Mame, I'm sorry.
381
00:33:27,857 --> 00:33:29,825
Well, I...
382
00:33:32,796 --> 00:33:35,822
I just don't think I can bear it.
383
00:33:36,866 --> 00:33:39,198
I just don't.
384
00:33:41,838 --> 00:33:43,430
Mame.
385
00:33:44,774 --> 00:33:46,901
I've never seen you cry before.
386
00:33:47,110 --> 00:33:48,907
Mame!
387
00:33:50,880 --> 00:33:53,474
- Mame, are you home?
- Is that you, Vera?
388
00:33:53,650 --> 00:33:56,050
What on earth does she want?
389
00:33:56,252 --> 00:34:00,348
Have you talked to your stockbroker?
Yes, I can see you have.
390
00:34:00,523 --> 00:34:05,392
- What about her stockbroker?
- He's trying to locate both of you.
391
00:34:05,595 --> 00:34:07,563
- What happened?
- Nothing.
392
00:34:07,764 --> 00:34:11,530
Except nothing's worth
anything anymore.
393
00:34:13,703 --> 00:34:15,933
- Hello.
- Now, don't you worry.
394
00:34:16,139 --> 00:34:20,838
It can't affect us. We own solid stuff
like Bank of the United States.
395
00:34:21,111 --> 00:34:26,447
Missy Dennis, stockbroker want to say
hello before he jump out of window.
396
00:34:29,853 --> 00:34:33,846
How bad is it, Arthur?
Not Bank of the United States.
397
00:34:34,691 --> 00:34:37,489
Atwater Kent too?
398
00:34:39,796 --> 00:34:43,789
Mame, I'm afraid you're wiped out.
We all are.
399
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:47,663
Everyone said I was a fool
spending all my money at Tiffany's.
400
00:34:47,871 --> 00:34:50,772
Who cares about money?
I've lost my child.
401
00:34:50,974 --> 00:34:54,137
- What?
- Patrick's trustee is sending him away.
402
00:34:54,344 --> 00:34:57,074
Oh, Mame, darling.
403
00:34:57,280 --> 00:35:00,681
I know how you must feel.
404
00:35:02,452 --> 00:35:05,250
- Do you?
- Well, of course I do.
405
00:35:05,455 --> 00:35:09,255
I never had a child,
but I'm an actress. I can imagine.
406
00:35:09,425 --> 00:35:11,757
There must be something I can do.
407
00:35:11,961 --> 00:35:17,593
I've got it! The perfect solution.
It'll solve everything. You'll work.
408
00:35:17,801 --> 00:35:20,201
- Work?
- You'll return to the stage...
409
00:35:20,370 --> 00:35:24,238
...in my play, Midsummer Madness.
There are dozens of parts.
410
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:27,739
We open Thanksgiving in New Haven.
I'll call Max.
411
00:35:27,944 --> 00:35:31,744
- Do you think I could?
- Of course you could. Couldn't she?
412
00:35:31,948 --> 00:35:34,382
You'll have to work at something.
413
00:35:34,551 --> 00:35:38,317
The only chance to get Patrick back
is to show Babcock...
414
00:35:38,521 --> 00:35:41,820
...that you've settled down
into something steady.
415
00:35:42,025 --> 00:35:45,893
Or to earn money to fight him with.
You're so right!
416
00:35:46,095 --> 00:35:50,156
- About $500 a week to start.
- It'll be a bit in the last act.
417
00:35:50,366 --> 00:35:53,164
Then there'll be a raise. I accept!
418
00:35:53,369 --> 00:35:58,204
Your heart is from Tiffany's too.
It'll be like old times...
419
00:35:58,408 --> 00:36:02,811
...when we were trooping together
in Chu Chin Girl. I can't wait!
420
00:36:03,012 --> 00:36:05,276
This is a serious drama.
421
00:36:05,481 --> 00:36:07,949
I was in front. Vera was behind me.
422
00:36:08,117 --> 00:36:10,779
If I'd been behind you,
I'd have kicked...
423
00:36:10,987 --> 00:36:13,854
I know exactly what I did.
It used to go:
424
00:36:25,134 --> 00:36:27,193
That's it!
425
00:37:16,653 --> 00:37:19,588
- An appalling situation.
- Frightful, my dear.
426
00:37:19,789 --> 00:37:21,552
Where's Miss Dennis?
427
00:37:21,758 --> 00:37:25,421
Keep your shirt on!
She's still making up.
428
00:37:25,595 --> 00:37:29,725
She has a lousy two-line bit.
She's had two acts to make up.
429
00:37:29,933 --> 00:37:33,835
Make sure she knows her entrance
is from the other side.
430
00:37:34,037 --> 00:37:38,303
But in all fairness to him,
I believe she's been leading him on.
431
00:37:38,508 --> 00:37:42,672
After all, she is a princess.
He, a commoner.
432
00:37:42,879 --> 00:37:47,009
Everybody into the solarium.
I think I hear them coming now.
433
00:37:47,216 --> 00:37:50,185
But, Reginald, to do such a thing!
434
00:37:50,386 --> 00:37:54,015
To dash away together like this
would be mad.
435
00:37:54,223 --> 00:37:58,387
Quite devastatingly mad.
436
00:37:59,862 --> 00:38:03,389
Quite devastatingly mad.
437
00:38:06,235 --> 00:38:10,069
Lord Dudley, your flattery would turn
a young girl's head.
438
00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:14,266
Come now. Hurry to the ball.
If we tarry, we shall be late.
439
00:38:18,047 --> 00:38:20,072
No, it would be madness.
440
00:38:20,249 --> 00:38:25,812
I belong to one world, you to another.
It's better we part now.
441
00:38:26,022 --> 00:38:30,186
Now, while we cherish
this ecstasy we've known.
442
00:38:30,393 --> 00:38:33,123
What have you got back there,
reindeer?
443
00:38:33,329 --> 00:38:38,164
This is goodbye, Reginald.
I hear the others coming.
444
00:38:42,605 --> 00:38:47,406
Lord Dudley, no more champagne
or I shall forget myself altogether.
445
00:38:47,610 --> 00:38:51,671
- I have... I have...
- I must say, you're the funniest man.
446
00:38:51,881 --> 00:38:54,145
I have something to tell you!
447
00:38:54,350 --> 00:38:57,842
I have been unexpectedly
called back home.
448
00:38:58,054 --> 00:39:02,855
Prince Alex needs me
and my place is by his side.
449
00:39:03,059 --> 00:39:06,392
It has been so lovely
this whole summer.
450
00:39:06,596 --> 00:39:12,762
But after all, it has only been
midsummer madness.
451
00:39:13,503 --> 00:39:18,463
Lady Iris, would you be good enough
to ring for my wrap?
452
00:39:18,674 --> 00:39:21,609
Certainly, princess.
453
00:39:23,379 --> 00:39:27,679
And get rid of those damn cowbells!
454
00:39:28,885 --> 00:39:34,653
- May I help you, princess?
- Thank you, Lady Iris.
455
00:39:40,663 --> 00:39:42,426
Goodbye, goodbye.
456
00:39:42,632 --> 00:39:47,763
I shall always feel
a strong attachment to you all.
457
00:39:47,937 --> 00:39:50,132
- Let go!
- I can't. I'm stuck.
458
00:39:50,339 --> 00:39:52,432
Let go!
459
00:39:53,843 --> 00:39:59,179
- It's my bracelet. It's caught on you.
- Bring down the curtain!
460
00:40:03,686 --> 00:40:04,812
I was only...
461
00:40:04,987 --> 00:40:09,185
Ruining my beautiful play
with your lousy bell ringing!
462
00:40:11,494 --> 00:40:15,794
These are the only bracelets
I have in the world.
463
00:40:17,133 --> 00:40:20,102
Enough! That's enough!
464
00:40:38,454 --> 00:40:40,945
- Okay, strike the set!
- Why?
465
00:40:41,157 --> 00:40:46,094
- I thought I'd give her character.
- You scene-stealing, society biddy!
466
00:40:46,295 --> 00:40:49,731
You destroyed me!
There were critics out there!
467
00:40:49,899 --> 00:40:51,264
We're all ruined!
468
00:40:51,467 --> 00:40:57,235
Don't let me catch the sight of
your evil face again, you assassin!
469
00:40:57,440 --> 00:41:00,307
But, Vera... You see...
470
00:41:00,476 --> 00:41:03,707
I felt if I should make
something out of...
471
00:41:03,913 --> 00:41:06,575
There weren't
many lines, and I felt...
472
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:13,080
Ms. Charles asked...
473
00:41:57,500 --> 00:42:02,528
I thought you were very good,
Auntie Mame. Everybody noticed you.
474
00:42:02,738 --> 00:42:07,198
My little love.
How did you get up to New Haven?
475
00:42:07,376 --> 00:42:09,469
lto brought me up.
476
00:42:09,645 --> 00:42:12,375
How could lto drive you up?
I sold the car.
477
00:42:12,548 --> 00:42:15,745
He didn't drive. We hitchhiked.
478
00:42:15,952 --> 00:42:18,420
Mr. Babcock thinks you're in school.
479
00:42:18,621 --> 00:42:23,524
It's all right.
It's Thanksgiving vacation.
480
00:42:23,693 --> 00:42:26,184
Is it?
481
00:42:28,631 --> 00:42:34,126
Can I be your escort?
Can I take you back to your hotel?
482
00:42:37,607 --> 00:42:41,907
You can take me all the way
back to New York.
483
00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:45,741
Patrick.
484
00:42:46,882 --> 00:42:49,407
Oh, Patrick.
485
00:42:50,386 --> 00:42:53,355
Are you ashamed of your Auntie Mame?
486
00:42:54,123 --> 00:42:56,182
I'm proud of you!
487
00:42:56,392 --> 00:43:01,227
Nobody liked the stinky old play
at all until you came in.
488
00:43:15,278 --> 00:43:17,644
Lady Iris?
489
00:43:23,452 --> 00:43:25,647
Charmed...
490
00:43:26,689 --> 00:43:28,987
...Lord Dudley.
491
00:44:03,826 --> 00:44:06,420
Widdicombe, Gutterman,
Applewhite, Bibberman and Black.
492
00:44:06,595 --> 00:44:10,497
You want to talk to Mr. Gutterman?
I'll connect you.
493
00:44:10,666 --> 00:44:14,158
Widdicombe, Gutterman,
Applewhite, Bibberman and Black.
494
00:44:14,337 --> 00:44:18,933
Yes, Mr. Bibberman. You'd like to talk
to Mr. Applewhite. I'll connect you.
495
00:44:24,013 --> 00:44:26,709
Yes, long distance, how are you?
496
00:44:26,882 --> 00:44:31,319
Mr. Widdicombe, I have
your San Francisco call for you.
497
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:33,784
Yes, Mr. Bibberman?
498
00:44:34,657 --> 00:44:40,095
Did I connect you with Mr. Gutterman
instead of Mr. Applewhite? I'm sorry.
499
00:44:40,296 --> 00:44:44,130
What are you doing in that hole
with Mr. Gutterman?
500
00:44:44,333 --> 00:44:45,891
Yes, Mr. Widdicombe?
501
00:44:46,068 --> 00:44:49,367
I'll try to reconnect you again
with San Francisco.
502
00:44:49,572 --> 00:44:53,872
Let me see, Mr. Bibberman is in there.
Where is Mr. Applewhite?
503
00:44:54,043 --> 00:44:59,276
There you are, Mr. Applewhite!
There's no such place as San Francisco.
504
00:44:59,482 --> 00:45:01,507
Please!
505
00:45:33,416 --> 00:45:37,182
Roller-skate lady.
Where is the roller-skate lady?
506
00:45:37,353 --> 00:45:40,254
That stupid clerk sent me
two left skates.
507
00:45:40,423 --> 00:45:43,722
Does Macy think my son
has two left feet?
508
00:45:43,893 --> 00:45:49,160
If you'll just be patient, madam.
Where is the roller-skate lady?
509
00:45:49,365 --> 00:45:53,734
- I don't know how I got in Tinkertoys.
- I want a pair of skates.
510
00:45:53,936 --> 00:45:56,700
One moment. Oh, Mr. Loomis!
511
00:45:56,906 --> 00:45:59,875
Will you help me with my sales slip?
512
00:46:00,075 --> 00:46:03,135
Why don't you let me
send these COD?
513
00:46:03,345 --> 00:46:06,576
- Then you wouldn't have to pay.
- I would eventually.
514
00:46:06,749 --> 00:46:10,742
Of course, but why worry about it now?
515
00:46:12,455 --> 00:46:15,015
Now, here's your slip.
It's so simple.
516
00:46:15,224 --> 00:46:21,185
No big, bulky bundles to carry or lose
en route, as it were. I love COD.
517
00:46:21,397 --> 00:46:27,267
- Excuse me, ma'am. Ma'am.
- Just one moment, please. Yes?
518
00:46:27,436 --> 00:46:29,666
Yes?
519
00:46:29,839 --> 00:46:33,832
Can you assist me in ordering
24 pair of those roller skates?
520
00:46:34,176 --> 00:46:39,341
Twenty-four pair!
My, what a proud father you must be.
521
00:46:39,515 --> 00:46:41,210
I'm a single gentleman.
522
00:46:41,417 --> 00:46:44,511
But there are tykes
at Oglethorpe Orphanage...
523
00:46:44,687 --> 00:46:47,383
...that will be happy
to see that package.
524
00:46:47,590 --> 00:46:50,491
That's a nice thing to do.
It's the true...
525
00:46:50,693 --> 00:46:53,457
How much does that come to,
little lady?
526
00:46:53,662 --> 00:46:56,290
You want to pay? Cash?
527
00:46:56,499 --> 00:46:59,161
Just Oglethorpe Orphanage,
Georgia.
528
00:46:59,368 --> 00:47:02,428
Wouldn't you prefer
if I sent them COD?
529
00:47:02,638 --> 00:47:06,506
The nippers wouldn't think
much of their Santa Claus...
530
00:47:06,709 --> 00:47:11,408
...if he filled their stockings
with bills for collection on delivery.
531
00:47:13,415 --> 00:47:15,542
I haven't worked here long.
532
00:47:15,751 --> 00:47:19,812
The only kind of sales slip
I know how to make out is COD.
533
00:47:20,022 --> 00:47:22,388
I might be of assistance here.
534
00:47:22,591 --> 00:47:27,494
- We'd get in a lot of trouble.
- I'm familiar with financial matters.
535
00:47:27,663 --> 00:47:31,793
First, get your duplicates
and triplicates straightened out.
536
00:47:32,001 --> 00:47:35,801
Mr. Macy wouldn't have any way
of knowing what you sold.
537
00:47:36,005 --> 00:47:40,032
- That's why they have tissue paper!
- A nice, new order blank.
538
00:47:40,242 --> 00:47:41,675
First name:
539
00:47:41,877 --> 00:47:43,538
Beauregard...
540
00:47:43,746 --> 00:47:47,079
...Jackson Pickett Burnside.
541
00:47:47,283 --> 00:47:50,184
That's a lot.
You took up all that space.
542
00:47:50,386 --> 00:47:53,617
Ms. Dennis! May I inquire
what is going on here?
543
00:47:53,822 --> 00:47:58,657
- He was helping me with the slip.
- This young lady, Ms. Dennis...
544
00:47:58,861 --> 00:48:03,662
...was having trouble with the sales
slip for skates. I was helping her.
545
00:48:03,866 --> 00:48:07,825
- Was there something unusual?
- Yes, he wanted to pay cash.
546
00:48:08,003 --> 00:48:11,530
A Macy employee doesn't know
how to make a cash sale?
547
00:48:11,707 --> 00:48:14,403
I'm a whiz at CODs.
You can tell.
548
00:48:14,610 --> 00:48:19,309
Ms. Dennis, this sales book
is a shambles!
549
00:48:19,548 --> 00:48:22,278
Goodbye, everybody,
and Merry Christmas.
550
00:48:22,484 --> 00:48:25,476
That young lady was doing
the best she knew!
551
00:48:25,688 --> 00:48:28,555
I consider myself
responsible for this!
552
00:48:28,757 --> 00:48:30,987
The thing is a misunderstanding.
553
00:48:31,193 --> 00:48:34,651
Don't forget the skates
for the little nippers!
554
00:48:34,863 --> 00:48:37,957
Get them at Gimbels!
555
00:49:45,267 --> 00:49:48,828
I'm not finished decorating yet.
You're home early.
556
00:49:49,038 --> 00:49:53,304
They gave me my Christmas
vacation a little bit early.
557
00:49:53,509 --> 00:49:56,808
I'm glad, because now
it fits with your vacation.
558
00:49:57,012 --> 00:50:01,745
We won't miss even a day together.
Patrick, that's beautiful.
559
00:50:01,917 --> 00:50:07,116
A genuine Picasso, huh?
His black and blue period.
560
00:50:13,328 --> 00:50:16,957
It's almost a week till Christmas.
561
00:50:17,566 --> 00:50:19,500
But open it.
562
00:50:19,668 --> 00:50:22,660
Patrick, where did you get the money?
563
00:50:22,838 --> 00:50:25,705
Mr. Leavitt down at the pawnshop...
564
00:50:25,874 --> 00:50:30,334
...gave me a good price for
my hockey stick and microscope.
565
00:50:30,512 --> 00:50:34,846
- I was getting tired of microbes.
- Now, you know you...
566
00:50:35,017 --> 00:50:38,953
- My, my, my, my.
- They're not quite diamonds.
567
00:50:39,121 --> 00:50:45,822
Oh, darling, that's the most beautiful
bracelet I ever owned.
568
00:50:51,166 --> 00:50:52,690
Wiggle it.
569
00:50:54,303 --> 00:50:57,864
See, it doesn't make any noise.
570
00:50:59,475 --> 00:51:04,037
I told the man you had to have
a quiet one for when you go on-stage.
571
00:51:04,246 --> 00:51:08,683
Wear it with your mink coat.
You'll make a sensation at Macy's.
572
00:51:08,884 --> 00:51:11,819
I've already made
a sensation at Macy's.
573
00:51:12,020 --> 00:51:15,922
My mink coat is down at Mr. Leavitt's
with your microscope.
574
00:51:16,091 --> 00:51:20,118
If we're going to have Christmas,
let's have it all around.
575
00:51:20,295 --> 00:51:23,662
Norah, lto! Come in, please!
576
00:51:26,568 --> 00:51:28,661
Yes, Missy Dennis?
577
00:51:29,505 --> 00:51:33,100
- Merry Christmas, everyone!
- It isn't till Tuesday.
578
00:51:33,275 --> 00:51:36,608
We need it now,
so let's go ahead and have it.
579
00:51:36,779 --> 00:51:42,684
Norah, lto, Patrick. I did want to pay
you some of your back salary...
580
00:51:42,851 --> 00:51:46,947
Not another word about it.
We wouldn't think of leaving you.
581
00:51:47,122 --> 00:51:50,353
No place else get job anyhow.
582
00:51:51,260 --> 00:51:56,755
It isn't 17 jewels, but time isn't
worth all that decoration these days.
583
00:51:56,965 --> 00:51:58,227
Thank you.
584
00:51:58,433 --> 00:52:02,028
So French-smelling, I feel
as alluring as Theda Bara.
585
00:52:02,237 --> 00:52:06,230
Golly, long pants at last!
Can I try them on right now?
586
00:52:06,408 --> 00:52:09,206
Right now!
587
00:52:10,579 --> 00:52:14,811
Well, we've got a little present
for you too, lto and me.
588
00:52:15,017 --> 00:52:19,351
- I hope you're not going to be angry.
- What is it?
589
00:52:19,788 --> 00:52:24,316
lto had money put by and so did I,
for a rainy day, you might say.
590
00:52:24,493 --> 00:52:29,226
We both figure it couldn't get much
wetter than it is right now.
591
00:52:29,698 --> 00:52:35,603
We pay grocery and butcher bill.
Now Mr. Schultz no give nasty look.
592
00:52:42,878 --> 00:52:45,642
You're both so dear to me.
593
00:52:49,551 --> 00:52:52,247
I'll pay you back one day.
594
00:52:54,523 --> 00:52:56,889
You know I will...
595
00:52:58,327 --> 00:53:00,761
...if ever I can.
596
00:53:09,238 --> 00:53:13,800
You're a loving woman.
You're odd, but you're loving.
597
00:53:14,009 --> 00:53:16,534
We wish that
you could find a man...
598
00:53:16,745 --> 00:53:22,149
...as wonderful and as fine
a gentleman as you are a fine lady.
599
00:53:22,885 --> 00:53:26,878
What happened to Mr. Lindsay Woolsey?
He was a nice man.
600
00:53:27,089 --> 00:53:30,752
Yes, he was a nice man,
but I sent him away.
601
00:53:30,959 --> 00:53:35,191
I said no when I had money.
I couldn't say yes when I went broke.
602
00:53:35,397 --> 00:53:37,331
Look!
603
00:53:37,499 --> 00:53:40,627
Besides, I have my own
fine gentleman, Norah...
604
00:53:40,836 --> 00:53:44,966
...who gives me diamonds
or almost diamonds.
605
00:53:45,173 --> 00:53:50,611
What we need is some music.
Some Christmas carols!
606
00:54:22,811 --> 00:54:25,439
Patrick, go to her.
607
00:54:31,186 --> 00:54:35,088
Don't cry, Auntie Mame.
Please don't cry.
608
00:54:36,358 --> 00:54:39,725
Hell, we don't even have any Kleenex.
609
00:54:43,231 --> 00:54:47,190
If that's Santa Claus,
tell him we've already had it.
610
00:54:48,337 --> 00:54:52,273
Howdy. Excuse me,
but I wondered if...
611
00:54:55,510 --> 00:54:57,637
I declare, it's a miracle.
612
00:54:57,846 --> 00:55:01,373
That's what it is.
It's a Christmas miracle.
613
00:55:01,583 --> 00:55:07,283
You've got no idea how happy I am.
I've been looking all over for you.
614
00:55:07,489 --> 00:55:11,892
Do you realize there are 97 Dennises
in the Manhattan directory?
615
00:55:12,094 --> 00:55:15,222
I was just about ready
to sail for Brooklyn.
616
00:55:15,430 --> 00:55:17,728
Tell me why you came here.
617
00:55:17,933 --> 00:55:21,562
I went back to apologize to you,
but you was gone.
618
00:55:21,770 --> 00:55:24,830
I told them Macy folks
that they was wrong.
619
00:55:25,007 --> 00:55:28,636
Why, a woman of your culture
and charm and refinement...
620
00:55:28,844 --> 00:55:31,472
...should have
an executive position...
621
00:55:31,646 --> 00:55:36,481
...with a lot of hard hands to wrestle
with them pesky writing details.
622
00:55:36,685 --> 00:55:38,414
Would you excuse me?
623
00:55:38,587 --> 00:55:41,954
I want to pay off that taxi man,
so he can get home.
624
00:55:42,124 --> 00:55:46,220
You left the taxi meter running
in the middle of the Depression?
625
00:55:46,395 --> 00:55:48,420
Well, ma'am, I'm in oil.
626
00:55:48,630 --> 00:55:53,033
It just keeps on gushing
and not much I can do about it.
627
00:55:53,201 --> 00:55:58,366
I'm all alone here and if you wouldn't
consider me too presumptuous...
628
00:55:58,540 --> 00:56:01,373
...l'd be honored
to squire you to dinner.
629
00:56:01,910 --> 00:56:06,711
No, thank you. We're celebrating.
I can't leave my little family.
630
00:56:06,915 --> 00:56:10,373
I can understand that.
I'm knee-deep in family.
631
00:56:10,585 --> 00:56:13,816
You ought to come to Georgia
and meet them all.
632
00:56:14,022 --> 00:56:18,152
- I think you'd just love Peckerwood.
- Who's Peckerwood?
633
00:56:18,360 --> 00:56:22,626
No, ma'am. That's the name
of my little old plantation.
634
00:56:22,831 --> 00:56:27,564
Maybe, just for tonight, I could
be part of your little old family?
635
00:56:27,769 --> 00:56:31,102
- And we'd have dinner together.
- I'm not dressed.
636
00:56:31,306 --> 00:56:34,207
You look fine.
You don't need to worry.
637
00:56:34,409 --> 00:56:37,037
A little powder and you'll look...
638
00:56:41,383 --> 00:56:43,817
Just fine.
639
00:56:46,888 --> 00:56:50,949
Look here, I'll tell
that nice taxi man to wait.
640
00:56:51,126 --> 00:56:54,584
Marry him the minute he asks you!
641
00:56:54,796 --> 00:56:56,593
What's his name?
642
00:56:56,798 --> 00:56:59,028
- You don't know his name.
- I do.
643
00:56:59,234 --> 00:57:04,570
We are about to break bread with
Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside.
644
00:57:04,773 --> 00:57:08,174
Get your coat.
Ito, change your jacket. Now, hurry!
645
00:57:08,577 --> 00:57:12,308
And you'd better bring your scarf,
it's cold outside.
646
00:57:12,514 --> 00:57:15,779
Norah, don't forget
to take your apron off.
647
00:57:19,387 --> 00:57:21,855
Ito, hurry!
648
00:57:25,627 --> 00:57:28,255
I was going to give you this
at dinner.
649
00:57:28,463 --> 00:57:32,832
Norah, you're an angel.
There must be one for you too.
650
00:57:33,034 --> 00:57:36,936
Me never believe in Santa.
Me beginning to change mind.
651
00:57:37,139 --> 00:57:40,973
I never did think Santa
would have a Southern accent!
652
00:57:42,544 --> 00:57:46,480
Merry Christmas from
Manny, Moe and Jack.
653
00:57:46,681 --> 00:57:52,142
Merry Christmas to y'all, Manny, Moe
and Jack. And a Happy New Year!
654
00:58:03,398 --> 00:58:04,387
Good morning.
655
00:58:04,599 --> 00:58:08,399
Where's my snuffbox?
What son of a dog stole my snuffbox?
656
00:58:08,570 --> 00:58:10,868
It's in your lap, Mother Burnside.
657
00:58:11,072 --> 00:58:14,405
Where is she?
I don't see any New York filly here.
658
00:58:14,576 --> 00:58:17,204
Just the same old family
standing around...
659
00:58:17,379 --> 00:58:20,109
...waiting to be mentioned in my will.
660
00:58:20,582 --> 00:58:24,484
- Afternoon to y'all. Vultures!
- Good afternoon.
661
00:58:24,686 --> 00:58:28,144
Now, Ms. Burnside,
that doesn't include me, does it?
662
00:58:28,323 --> 00:58:34,023
No, Sally Cato, you ain't no vulture.
You're just a dead pigeon.
663
00:58:38,934 --> 00:58:42,529
I can't see how you got
Beauregard out of your nest.
664
00:58:42,704 --> 00:58:44,604
You should've sat on him.
665
00:58:44,773 --> 00:58:48,709
Son? We got our sweet
Georgia peaches right here.
666
00:58:48,910 --> 00:58:53,108
Don't know why you had to go
and bring back a Northern lemon.
667
00:58:53,281 --> 00:58:56,512
Let's keep our grits going
in the right direction.
668
00:58:56,952 --> 00:59:01,082
My Auntie Mame, Miss Dennis,
says she'll be here in a moment.
669
00:59:01,289 --> 00:59:05,350
Well, now, what a lovable,
genteel little gentleman!
670
00:59:05,527 --> 00:59:08,223
You and my brother
are gonna get along...
671
00:59:08,430 --> 00:59:12,161
...like a pair of colts in a pasture,
I can just tell.
672
00:59:12,367 --> 00:59:13,857
Emory!
673
00:59:16,037 --> 00:59:18,437
- Your sister's nice.
- Nice?
674
00:59:18,640 --> 00:59:24,078
You're plumb crazy. She's the meanest
damn filly in the entire South.
675
00:59:24,246 --> 00:59:27,215
Mame, where are you?
We're all waiting on you.
676
00:59:27,415 --> 00:59:30,646
- I'm coming, Beau, sugar.
- There we are, honey.
677
00:59:30,852 --> 00:59:35,448
I'm sorry to keep you waiting.
I'm just busting to meet your mother.
678
00:59:37,359 --> 00:59:42,058
Mother, dear, I'd like
to present Miss Mame Dennis.
679
00:59:43,465 --> 00:59:44,932
Well, I...
680
00:59:45,133 --> 00:59:50,696
I must say, Mrs. Burnside,
you're everything I ever expected.
681
00:59:51,172 --> 00:59:55,165
- And quite more.
- And these here are my...
682
00:59:57,979 --> 00:59:59,310
Bless you.
683
00:59:59,681 --> 01:00:04,141
These are the rest of my kin.
The Jacksons, Picketts, Burnsides.
684
01:00:04,352 --> 01:00:06,547
This is Sally Cato MacDougal.
685
01:00:06,755 --> 01:00:10,987
Stay out here and have a nice chat.
I'm gonna fix you a drink.
686
01:00:11,192 --> 01:00:16,027
And then we're gonna run along down
and I'll have you meet my horses.
687
01:00:19,267 --> 01:00:20,734
Well, I...
688
01:00:21,569 --> 01:00:26,597
I can't tell you how charming
it is to meet all of...
689
01:00:27,075 --> 01:00:28,599
...you all.
690
01:00:28,777 --> 01:00:31,837
Tell me, Miss Dennis...
May I call you "Mame"?
691
01:00:32,013 --> 01:00:34,709
- Please do.
- And you call me Sally Cato.
692
01:00:34,883 --> 01:00:36,475
- Thank you.
- Tell me...
693
01:00:36,685 --> 01:00:41,782
...was it horses brought you
and Beauregard together?
694
01:00:41,956 --> 01:00:44,925
A horse is the most important
thing in his life.
695
01:00:45,126 --> 01:00:50,962
I love riding. In New York, hardly a
day goes by, I don't have boots on.
696
01:00:51,166 --> 01:00:54,932
Up every morning at dawn
for a ride through Central Park.
697
01:00:55,136 --> 01:00:59,004
That settles it. In your honor,
we've got to have a hunt.
698
01:00:59,174 --> 01:01:01,734
A hunt? Oh, a hunt. A hunt?!
699
01:01:01,943 --> 01:01:05,379
Everybody, Beauregard's gone
and surprised us all!
700
01:01:05,580 --> 01:01:10,847
She's a prominent Northern horsewoman.
Naturally, we've got to have a hunt.
701
01:01:11,052 --> 01:01:14,283
Dawn, tomorrow morning.
Everybody's invited!
702
01:01:14,489 --> 01:01:17,049
Won't we have a lark?
The sun up...
703
01:01:17,258 --> 01:01:23,686
...leaping over hedges, jumping over
river gaps and the hounds yapping!
704
01:01:23,898 --> 01:01:27,527
Every eye in this county
will be on you tomorrow.
705
01:01:27,736 --> 01:01:30,603
I didn't bring any of my riding togs.
706
01:01:30,805 --> 01:01:34,036
Don't worry, I got dozens
of things you can wear.
707
01:01:34,242 --> 01:01:36,472
- What's your shoe size?
- 3B.
708
01:01:36,678 --> 01:01:42,583
That's marvelous! Same as I wear.
You do ride astride, Mame, dear?
709
01:01:42,751 --> 01:01:47,586
No, sidesaddle. Daddy,
the colonel, insisted that I learn it.
710
01:01:47,789 --> 01:01:53,455
He said it was the only way for a lady
to ride, so graceful. Silly of him.
711
01:01:53,661 --> 01:01:57,722
Nobody rides sidesaddle now,
but it's the only way I know.
712
01:01:57,932 --> 01:02:00,196
Now, isn't that just grand?
713
01:02:00,402 --> 01:02:04,600
I just happen to have a little
sidesaddle that'll do you fine.
714
01:02:04,806 --> 01:02:06,774
- Refreshments?
- Beau, darling...
715
01:02:06,975 --> 01:02:11,571
...we're having a hunt. Your sweet
Yankee girl is riding sidesaddle!
716
01:02:11,780 --> 01:02:16,581
- I won't permit it. It's too dangerous!
- But, darling, she's insisted.
717
01:02:16,785 --> 01:02:21,449
Well, anything that Mame says
she can do, she can do.
718
01:02:21,656 --> 01:02:24,386
I tell you, she's an amazing woman.
719
01:02:24,592 --> 01:02:26,150
Mame, sugar...
720
01:02:26,361 --> 01:02:31,458
...l'm just gonna hold my breath
until dawn tomorrow.
721
01:02:31,766 --> 01:02:33,996
Do that, honey.
722
01:02:40,341 --> 01:02:44,437
Stop looking at the pictures.
Read it to me, I'm listening.
723
01:02:44,646 --> 01:02:46,443
"How to Ride a Horse."
724
01:02:46,648 --> 01:02:50,516
It says, "Always get on the horse
from the left side."
725
01:02:50,718 --> 01:02:55,655
- My left side or the horse's left side?
- It doesn't say. Listen to this.
726
01:02:55,857 --> 01:02:58,621
"Whenever approaching
a strange mount...
727
01:02:58,793 --> 01:03:02,285
...fix the animal in the eye
with a masterful gaze.
728
01:03:02,464 --> 01:03:06,560
Remain calm, for a horse has
a highly developed sense of smell...
729
01:03:06,734 --> 01:03:09,862
...and can react dangerously
when he smells fear."
730
01:03:10,038 --> 01:03:11,835
I hope he likes Chanel No. 5.
731
01:03:12,006 --> 01:03:15,339
I didn't know this.
"Horses aren't native to America."
732
01:03:15,510 --> 01:03:19,241
Read me something useful.
I'm about to go over the top.
733
01:03:19,447 --> 01:03:23,508
Clearing fences.
It says you should always lean.
734
01:03:23,718 --> 01:03:27,347
Jumping water hazards.
"Don't lean. Sit erect."
735
01:03:27,555 --> 01:03:30,353
Don't lean. Sit erect.
Say your prayers.
736
01:03:30,558 --> 01:03:34,517
Be good to Norah and lto
after I'm gone.
737
01:03:37,632 --> 01:03:40,192
I think Sally left a foot in this one.
738
01:03:40,401 --> 01:03:44,132
- Let me help you.
- No, darling. It's no use.
739
01:03:44,906 --> 01:03:47,739
Why are you going through all this?
740
01:03:47,942 --> 01:03:52,811
If I can snag you an Uncle Beau,
all our problems will be solved.
741
01:03:53,014 --> 01:03:57,610
Besides, there's another minor,
relatively unimportant thing:
742
01:03:57,819 --> 01:04:00,481
I happen to be in love with him.
743
01:04:00,688 --> 01:04:04,385
I like Beau. I like him a lot.
Then it's all settled!
744
01:04:04,592 --> 01:04:07,527
Not so fast,
he hasn't asked me anything yet.
745
01:04:07,695 --> 01:04:11,631
- You dressed yet, Mame, honey?
- Come in, Beau, darling.
746
01:04:12,233 --> 01:04:17,398
- Oh, my, how handsome you look!
- Well, likewise, Mame.
747
01:04:25,747 --> 01:04:29,012
Hold it steady,
I want to get a picture of this.
748
01:04:29,217 --> 01:04:34,655
That's it. Now, give me
a nice pose, Mame, darling.
749
01:04:34,856 --> 01:04:38,348
And big smile! That's a girl.
750
01:04:38,560 --> 01:04:43,759
There we are. You have now
been immortalized in celluloid.
751
01:04:44,399 --> 01:04:45,696
Patrick.
752
01:04:45,900 --> 01:04:51,065
You must have left it in my room.
I'll find it.
753
01:04:58,680 --> 01:05:00,204
Mame...
754
01:05:03,084 --> 01:05:04,574
Thank you.
755
01:05:04,786 --> 01:05:09,849
I've got something to say. I'll have
to say it fast or not say it at all.
756
01:05:10,058 --> 01:05:15,018
Talk slow then, Beau, darling.
I can listen fast.
757
01:05:15,597 --> 01:05:21,194
Well, Mame, you and I don't
exactly come from the same world.
758
01:05:21,402 --> 01:05:27,671
Not that I think I'm worth...
There comes a time in every life...
759
01:05:29,510 --> 01:05:33,241
Mame, I'm just gonna have
to come right out and say it.
760
01:05:39,821 --> 01:05:42,585
Well, I'm gonna ask you to...
761
01:05:42,857 --> 01:05:45,223
Mame, would you...?
762
01:05:45,426 --> 01:05:50,363
- I mean, could you...?
- Mame! Mame, darling!
763
01:05:50,565 --> 01:05:52,658
It's me, Sally Cato!
764
01:05:53,167 --> 01:05:57,194
I wanted to see if there was anything...
Oh, hello, Beau.
765
01:05:57,405 --> 01:06:00,101
Was I interrupting?
766
01:06:00,675 --> 01:06:04,577
There's the signal, darling!
Come on, let's hurry.
767
01:06:05,580 --> 01:06:11,576
- Well, shall we to the hounds?
- Yeah, I'd love to meet your family.
768
01:06:30,538 --> 01:06:36,408
- We almost thought you wasn't coming.
- Morning. Lovely day for a hunt.
769
01:06:36,611 --> 01:06:39,603
Sugar, you look absolutely dreamy.
770
01:06:39,814 --> 01:06:44,911
Say, boys, you can bring
Miss Dennis' horse around now!
771
01:06:45,586 --> 01:06:47,645
Well, what a break.
772
01:06:47,855 --> 01:06:50,824
Glorious weather for the hunt.
773
01:06:51,259 --> 01:06:54,751
I thought it might rain,
we'd call it off.
774
01:06:54,962 --> 01:06:59,331
Well, where are we riding to?
Outside of the hounds, of course.
775
01:06:59,534 --> 01:07:03,197
It's a good 10-mile course,
for those that makes it.
776
01:07:03,404 --> 01:07:08,432
- I can try.
- This way, Auntie Mame.
777
01:07:10,645 --> 01:07:15,082
- Morning, Miss Dennis.
- Morning.
778
01:07:21,723 --> 01:07:23,190
Well, has he?
779
01:07:23,391 --> 01:07:26,883
Not yet. So I die an old maid
sometime before lunch.
780
01:07:27,095 --> 01:07:31,031
No, you won't. You look convincing,
like a magazine cover.
781
01:07:31,232 --> 01:07:33,723
Horror Stories.
782
01:07:43,044 --> 01:07:48,038
- What's in there?
- That's the horse I picked out for you.
783
01:07:49,484 --> 01:07:52,783
- What's his name?
- Meditation.
784
01:08:05,700 --> 01:08:08,225
I'll trip you. You'd only break a leg.
785
01:08:08,402 --> 01:08:12,566
I can't disgrace Beau,
not in front of all these people.
786
01:08:16,177 --> 01:08:18,941
Fix the animal in the eye
with a masterful gaze.
787
01:08:19,147 --> 01:08:23,777
Fix the master in the eye
with an animal gaze.
788
01:08:23,985 --> 01:08:27,887
Fix the aster in the maze
with an animal guy.
789
01:09:29,750 --> 01:09:33,880
You look fit. They're bringing
the fox up from the icehouse.
790
01:09:34,088 --> 01:09:36,818
Come on, let's go, everybody!
791
01:09:46,400 --> 01:09:49,995
Goodbye, Yankee gal!
792
01:10:14,395 --> 01:10:17,853
- Where does she think she's going?
- Look at him go!
793
01:10:18,065 --> 01:10:22,502
- Fall off! Fall off!
- Look out for that flood wall!
794
01:10:22,703 --> 01:10:27,663
- Auntie Mame, fall off! Fall off!
- Look out! Look out!
795
01:10:29,844 --> 01:10:34,838
Danged if she didn't sail
clear over it! No hands!
796
01:11:19,961 --> 01:11:22,521
Look at her! She's passing everybody!
797
01:11:22,730 --> 01:11:26,564
She's passing the master
of the hounds! Very bad form.
798
01:11:26,734 --> 01:11:28,929
She's passing the dogs!
799
01:11:29,103 --> 01:11:32,470
Mother of Jefferson Davis,
she's passing the fox!
800
01:11:36,711 --> 01:11:40,408
Ms. Burnside! I was driving by.
I thought I saw...
801
01:11:40,581 --> 01:11:44,449
- That couldn't be Meditation!
- Yes, fine bit of horseflesh.
802
01:11:44,618 --> 01:11:47,587
He's a killer! I gotta stop this!
803
01:11:55,963 --> 01:11:58,090
They're headed back this way!
804
01:12:03,137 --> 01:12:07,540
Stay out of the flowerbed!
Get that horse out of my bougainvillea!
805
01:12:10,778 --> 01:12:13,372
She's heading for the icehouse!
806
01:12:28,796 --> 01:12:32,698
That's my car! That's county property!
807
01:12:39,907 --> 01:12:41,340
Mame!
808
01:12:43,411 --> 01:12:46,209
- Mame, where are you?
- She come this way.
809
01:12:46,414 --> 01:12:49,508
There you are!
Darling, are you all right?
810
01:12:49,717 --> 01:12:53,847
If I hadn't grabbed on to this,
I'd have been in Nova Scotia!
811
01:12:54,055 --> 01:12:58,048
- What happened to the fox?
- Poor thing is all tuckered out.
812
01:12:58,259 --> 01:13:00,591
Oh, my little love!
813
01:13:00,795 --> 01:13:07,030
As county veterinarian, I commanded you
two years ago to destroy that horse!
814
01:13:07,234 --> 01:13:11,170
Letting her ride this horse,
superb horsewoman that she is...
815
01:13:11,372 --> 01:13:13,397
...that was premeditated murder!
816
01:13:13,674 --> 01:13:18,111
Let's have three cheers, everybody,
for my little Yankee!
817
01:13:18,312 --> 01:13:22,772
What a seat that woman has!
What a magnificent seat!
818
01:13:22,983 --> 01:13:26,419
Look here, everybody,
I want three cheers...
819
01:13:26,620 --> 01:13:31,284
...for the future Mrs. Beauregard
Jackson Pickett Burnside!
820
01:13:31,492 --> 01:13:33,016
- Hip, hip...
- Hooray!
821
01:13:33,227 --> 01:13:34,751
- Hip, hip...
- Hooray!
822
01:13:37,689 --> 01:13:39,623
Emory, come on home!
823
01:13:39,825 --> 01:13:43,556
Hot damn!
My sister's gonna bust a gut!
824
01:13:43,728 --> 01:13:46,060
What are y'all standing around for?
825
01:13:46,264 --> 01:13:50,064
Come back to the house.
We'll have a glass of whiskey.
826
01:13:50,268 --> 01:13:53,829
- Oh, Beau!
- Come on, Mame, darling.
827
01:13:54,039 --> 01:13:56,940
Here we are. Take it easy, now.
828
01:13:57,442 --> 01:14:01,742
Mame, I'm sorry about making
my proposal so public...
829
01:14:01,947 --> 01:14:06,145
...but I'm gonna do everything I can
to make you happy.
830
01:14:06,351 --> 01:14:10,788
Of course, you'll have to educate me.
Make me more cosmopolitan.
831
01:14:10,989 --> 01:14:15,688
For a honeymoon, let's take a trip
around the world for a few years.
832
01:14:15,894 --> 01:14:18,590
Oh, Beau! That's...
833
01:14:18,763 --> 01:14:21,425
- Darling, excuse me a minute.
- Sure.
834
01:14:21,633 --> 01:14:27,071
- My little love.
- Congratulations, Auntie Mame.
835
01:14:27,272 --> 01:14:31,572
Your Auntie Mame's in love
and very happy.
836
01:14:31,776 --> 01:14:34,677
I won't see you for a long time.
837
01:14:34,880 --> 01:14:39,476
Patrick, nothing can ever
really separate us.
838
01:14:39,684 --> 01:14:42,152
You'll join us on all your vacations.
839
01:14:42,354 --> 01:14:45,721
The rest of the time,
you'll be busy at school.
840
01:14:45,924 --> 01:14:48,688
I'll just have two men instead of one.
841
01:14:48,894 --> 01:14:51,920
And I'll write to you every day,
I promise.
842
01:14:52,130 --> 01:14:56,692
You don't think I'd run off and
abandon you to the Babcocks, do you?
843
01:14:56,902 --> 01:15:00,030
You're stuck with me
whether you like it or not.
844
01:15:00,238 --> 01:15:03,571
Now let me see you smile.
I want to see it.
845
01:15:03,775 --> 01:15:07,677
Where is it? That's my boy!
846
01:15:08,113 --> 01:15:13,983
Can I ask you just one question?
How did you stay on that horse?
847
01:15:14,519 --> 01:15:20,685
It's like New Haven with the bracelet.
I got stuck, but at the other end.
848
01:16:28,393 --> 01:16:33,524
"Dear Auntie Mame: I plan to spend this
holiday with Mr. Babcock in Darien."
849
01:16:33,732 --> 01:16:37,429
- Hold it right there, darling.
- Now, no higher, Beau.
850
01:16:38,737 --> 01:16:41,638
"Junior Babcock
and I have fun there...
851
01:16:41,840 --> 01:16:46,641
...and I have met the kids from all
the best families in Connecticut."
852
01:16:46,845 --> 01:16:48,335
Oh, dear.
853
01:17:02,093 --> 01:17:06,427
I have a feeling we should be
getting back. Patrick needs me.
854
01:17:06,631 --> 01:17:11,261
- That last one was the best one yet.
- Good, darling.
855
01:17:12,370 --> 01:17:16,704
- Now, did you put film in this time?
- I sure did.
856
01:17:16,908 --> 01:17:20,867
- Oh, dang!
- Up, up, Rover! Up, up!
857
01:17:30,121 --> 01:17:32,282
- Mrs. Burnside.
- Mr. Babcock.
858
01:17:32,490 --> 01:17:36,221
- So good to see you again.
- Thank you. Nice to see you.
859
01:17:36,428 --> 01:17:37,952
Darling!
860
01:17:39,531 --> 01:17:41,522
- Congratulations.
- Thank you.
861
01:17:41,733 --> 01:17:44,566
Mame! Up here, Mame, honey!
862
01:17:44,769 --> 01:17:47,203
That's it. Give me a nice smile.
863
01:17:49,774 --> 01:17:51,708
I gotcha.
864
01:17:58,917 --> 01:18:01,385
Mame, honey. Look up here.
865
01:18:01,586 --> 01:18:05,488
Come, Patrick. Do be careful, darling.
866
01:18:05,690 --> 01:18:11,151
Now, give me a nice smile.
Patrick, take off your hat.
867
01:18:11,362 --> 01:18:13,887
Now, give me a nice smile.
868
01:18:14,099 --> 01:18:15,691
That's it.
869
01:18:17,368 --> 01:18:19,495
I got it.
870
01:18:42,460 --> 01:18:44,325
- Dennis?
- Hey, Dennis!
871
01:18:44,529 --> 01:18:49,228
- Sign here.
- It's another one for you! Dennis!
872
01:18:49,400 --> 01:18:51,994
Siam this time.
873
01:18:53,438 --> 01:18:55,133
Thanks.
874
01:18:57,642 --> 01:18:59,940
Siam. "Dear Patrick:
875
01:19:00,145 --> 01:19:04,809
Here's a handy woman to have
around the house. Love, Auntie Mame."
876
01:19:18,696 --> 01:19:22,792
Here we are, darling.
You all right?
877
01:19:24,002 --> 01:19:26,470
Next time, let's take the elevator.
878
01:19:26,671 --> 01:19:30,971
It's 10,000 feet up.
We only got another mile to go.
879
01:19:31,176 --> 01:19:34,202
Why don't you stay here
and rest a while?
880
01:19:34,412 --> 01:19:36,846
I'll go up and get some film of you.
881
01:19:37,048 --> 01:19:40,381
- I'll finish Patrick's letter.
- All right.
882
01:19:42,921 --> 01:19:45,481
"Have to dash.
Dinner at Uncle Dwight's.
883
01:19:45,657 --> 01:19:49,991
That's Babcock,
the baboon-faced boy to you.
884
01:19:50,195 --> 01:19:53,995
Old Babcock's introducing me
to all the blond heiresses...
885
01:19:54,199 --> 01:19:57,032
...on the Eastern seaboard."
886
01:19:57,235 --> 01:20:00,432
Blond heiresses? Dwight?
887
01:20:00,638 --> 01:20:02,299
Beau? Beau!
888
01:20:02,507 --> 01:20:07,171
I knew that letter was worrying you.
I already made reservations back.
889
01:20:07,378 --> 01:20:10,643
Good. Well then, let's get back down.
890
01:20:10,849 --> 01:20:14,444
Wait a minute,
I still got a little more film left.
891
01:20:14,652 --> 01:20:18,383
Mame, would you mind
stepping back just a bit?
892
01:20:20,291 --> 01:20:24,284
- I'd rather not.
- Never mind, I'll scale up higher.
893
01:20:24,495 --> 01:20:26,690
Now, Beau, no higher!
894
01:20:27,699 --> 01:20:30,725
Take this.
It keeps on getting in my way.
895
01:20:30,935 --> 01:20:33,904
Take hold of the other end
for your balance.
896
01:20:34,105 --> 01:20:38,132
Don't you worry.
Just be looking out at the view there.
897
01:20:38,643 --> 01:20:44,275
Hold it now, will you?
Now, you hold on tight while I re-focus.
898
01:21:20,548 --> 01:21:26,384
Heavens, this looks like
the main chapel of a funeral parlor.
899
01:21:26,554 --> 01:21:30,752
- Haven't Norah and lto been alerted?
- They'll be here tomorrow.
900
01:21:30,958 --> 01:21:34,189
- What's that thing supposed to be?
- A Dictaphone.
901
01:21:34,395 --> 01:21:39,492
She'll never use it. Patrick's carried
all this junk up here for nothing.
902
01:21:39,701 --> 01:21:44,798
Mame can't stay still long enough
to write a postcard, let alone a book.
903
01:21:45,006 --> 01:21:48,669
No, he was right.
Mame can't go on living in a vacuum.
904
01:21:48,876 --> 01:21:52,277
- She's always got to have a project.
- She's got one.
905
01:21:52,480 --> 01:21:57,508
Now, she's the tragic queen.
She's having such fun being miserable.
906
01:21:57,719 --> 01:22:02,816
All she's done for 10 months is revisit
the places she's been with Beau.
907
01:22:03,024 --> 01:22:08,257
Eight times, she climbed the Matterhorn
to throw rose petals down the glacier.
908
01:22:08,429 --> 01:22:10,624
I should have gone to meet her.
909
01:22:10,798 --> 01:22:13,323
I haven't seen her since the funeral.
910
01:22:13,501 --> 01:22:16,937
Wasn't it just like Mame
to keep him till I got there?
911
01:22:17,105 --> 01:22:22,475
Listen, you cynic, she was in love
with him. She's changed, I tell you.
912
01:22:23,444 --> 01:22:26,208
Look, I'll get some champagne.
913
01:22:26,414 --> 01:22:28,712
I'll answer it.
914
01:22:35,723 --> 01:22:37,987
Mame!
915
01:22:38,226 --> 01:22:40,888
She can't have changed that much.
916
01:22:41,095 --> 01:22:43,359
- I'm from Speed-O.
- You're what?
917
01:22:43,564 --> 01:22:46,761
Patrick called a secretarial service.
Your name?
918
01:22:46,934 --> 01:22:48,595
Agnes Gooch.
919
01:22:48,803 --> 01:22:53,502
You'll be taking dictation from
Mrs. Burnside. She talks very fast.
920
01:22:53,708 --> 01:22:58,168
Speed-O won't let anybody out
who can't do 180 words a minute.
921
01:22:58,379 --> 01:23:01,576
- I'm over 200.
- No, you're not.
922
01:23:01,783 --> 01:23:05,810
She may let loose
with a million words and ideas.
923
01:23:06,020 --> 01:23:08,580
Soak them all up, like a sponge.
924
01:23:08,790 --> 01:23:12,248
Speed-O better have symbols
for four-letter words.
925
01:23:12,460 --> 01:23:15,088
Lindsay, Mame will never write a book.
926
01:23:15,263 --> 01:23:19,222
But Patrick got a fella to help her.
He'll be here at 3:00.
927
01:23:19,400 --> 01:23:20,560
What fella?
928
01:23:27,308 --> 01:23:29,401
- That's the signal.
- What signal?
929
01:23:29,610 --> 01:23:35,276
Patrick wants us to surprise Mame.
Come on, hide. In there, quick!
930
01:23:38,986 --> 01:23:41,853
You too, Miss Gooch.
931
01:23:42,857 --> 01:23:45,758
Why are you ringing?
Don't you have a key?
932
01:23:46,060 --> 01:23:49,689
Oh, of course! What am I thinking of?
933
01:23:54,535 --> 01:23:56,196
Welcome home.
934
01:23:56,404 --> 01:24:00,363
Good old Beekman Place.
Always so loyal.
935
01:24:00,575 --> 01:24:05,638
No matter how far I go, it waits
for me. I hope you used it weekends.
936
01:24:05,847 --> 01:24:11,217
No, I didn't. I usually go from school
to Connecticut, to Uncle Dwight's.
937
01:24:11,385 --> 01:24:14,912
I did rather expect Vera
to be down at the boat.
938
01:24:15,122 --> 01:24:18,523
I wouldn't let her.
I wanted to be alone with you.
939
01:24:18,726 --> 01:24:22,355
Patrick! My little Patrick.
940
01:24:22,563 --> 01:24:25,191
Now, open your presents.
941
01:24:25,399 --> 01:24:30,928
I can't get over it. Every time I see
you, you're taller and more grown-up.
942
01:24:31,138 --> 01:24:35,802
Oh, golly, short pants! At last.
Can I try them on right now?
943
01:24:35,977 --> 01:24:37,308
Right now.
944
01:24:37,512 --> 01:24:42,142
Surprise! Welcome home, Mame!
945
01:24:42,984 --> 01:24:45,179
Vera.
946
01:24:46,854 --> 01:24:51,382
And dear, staunch, stalwart Lindsay.
947
01:24:51,592 --> 01:24:55,961
How good of you both to rally
around this bereft old woman.
948
01:24:56,163 --> 01:24:58,961
- Doesn't she look great?
- How can you tell?
949
01:24:59,166 --> 01:25:02,067
Couldn't you have gone
to purple by now?
950
01:25:02,270 --> 01:25:06,969
Come on, Auntie Mame,
champagne and fishberry jam.
951
01:25:07,174 --> 01:25:10,507
No, Patrick. The bubbles
no longer tickle my nose.
952
01:25:10,711 --> 01:25:14,272
I've given up alcohol,
along with everything else.
953
01:25:14,482 --> 01:25:18,612
It's wonderful of you all.
Very touching, but... What's that?
954
01:25:18,786 --> 01:25:22,950
It's your Dictaphone
and your typewriter.
955
01:25:24,158 --> 01:25:27,423
- And what's that?
- I'm your sponge.
956
01:25:27,628 --> 01:25:30,825
- This is your secretary.
- My secretary?
957
01:25:31,032 --> 01:25:35,401
- Yes. You'll write your autobiography.
- Me? Write a book?
958
01:25:35,603 --> 01:25:38,163
No one's had a more colorful life.
959
01:25:38,372 --> 01:25:42,604
You've known fascinating people:
Winston Churchill, Gandhi, me.
960
01:25:42,810 --> 01:25:47,270
You'll be so busy digging up the past,
you won't think of the present.
961
01:25:47,481 --> 01:25:50,279
- And I promise to publish it.
- Oh, I see.
962
01:25:50,484 --> 01:25:53,009
This is some sort of conspiracy.
963
01:25:53,220 --> 01:25:57,247
Some trumped-up occupational therapy,
like basket weaving.
964
01:25:57,458 --> 01:26:01,792
I swear, it'll be a bestseller.
And you'd be doing me a favor.
965
01:26:01,963 --> 01:26:06,229
- My memoirs? Patrick, my drink.
- Champagne?
966
01:26:06,434 --> 01:26:12,202
Anything, just make it double. I see
it in two volumes. Boxed, like Proust.
967
01:26:12,406 --> 01:26:17,366
- Let me see. Chapter one, page one.
- She's supposed to start right now?
968
01:26:17,578 --> 01:26:24,006
This isn't so difficult. Another drink.
Where was I? Chapter one, page one...
969
01:26:24,218 --> 01:26:27,676
- What are you writing?
- "Chapter one, page one.
970
01:26:27,855 --> 01:26:33,020
This isn't so difficult. Another drink.
Where was I? What are you writing?"
971
01:26:33,227 --> 01:26:34,888
She is fast.
972
01:26:35,162 --> 01:26:36,789
You're off and running.
973
01:26:36,998 --> 01:26:41,765
Should I do this? lt'll take up all
my time. I came home to be with you.
974
01:26:41,969 --> 01:26:45,735
After all, you can't be with me.
No women in the dorm.
975
01:26:45,940 --> 01:26:48,204
I forgot, you're grown-up now.
976
01:26:48,409 --> 01:26:52,573
You don't need me anymore.
Nobody needs me anymore. It's sad...
977
01:26:52,780 --> 01:26:54,509
How do you turn her off?
978
01:26:54,715 --> 01:26:58,173
The most important thing is
to have a good beginning.
979
01:26:58,352 --> 01:27:02,186
- Wait for your collaborator.
- Collaborator?
980
01:27:02,390 --> 01:27:06,087
Yes. My friend got a kind
of editor to work with you.
981
01:27:06,260 --> 01:27:08,854
Fella named O'Bannion.
982
01:27:09,130 --> 01:27:13,794
You don't trust me to write
my own life? He got me a ghost!
983
01:27:14,001 --> 01:27:17,528
- It's not a ghost.
- I see it all now. A ghostwriter!
984
01:27:17,738 --> 01:27:21,401
I won't expose my life
to some beer-drinking Irishman...
985
01:27:21,575 --> 01:27:25,204
...who leads a low, common life
in some Third Avenue bar!
986
01:27:25,579 --> 01:27:29,709
You don't trust me to write my life?
Who else could write it?
987
01:27:29,917 --> 01:27:32,181
Whoever this creature is...
988
01:27:32,353 --> 01:27:35,288
Mr. O'Bannion to see you.
989
01:27:37,324 --> 01:27:41,954
I was asked to drop by to meet
the fabulous Mrs. Burnside.
990
01:27:45,700 --> 01:27:48,430
You are she, of course.
991
01:27:48,636 --> 01:27:52,970
I can sense the aura
of creative vitality about you.
992
01:28:02,383 --> 01:28:06,786
Won't you come in, Mr. O'Bannion?
993
01:28:12,426 --> 01:28:15,657
I thought by way
of introduction, Mrs. Burnside...
994
01:28:15,863 --> 01:28:20,800
...l'd present you with a slim volume
of my poems, The Parched Garden.
995
01:28:21,001 --> 01:28:23,834
What a lovely title. Thank you.
996
01:28:24,038 --> 01:28:26,131
Do you mind if I sit down?
997
01:28:26,340 --> 01:28:30,777
That long ride up in the elevator,
it's after getting me dizzy.
998
01:28:30,978 --> 01:28:35,210
- I'll get you a bit of water.
- No, please don't bother.
999
01:28:35,716 --> 01:28:39,277
Of course, a bit of champagne,
if it's handy.
1000
01:28:39,487 --> 01:28:41,455
Patrick.
1001
01:28:41,655 --> 01:28:44,419
It seems to help.
1002
01:28:48,095 --> 01:28:49,892
Thank you.
1003
01:28:51,398 --> 01:28:53,662
It's the other one.
1004
01:28:57,271 --> 01:29:00,263
Tell me, how did it happen?
1005
01:29:00,474 --> 01:29:03,807
Well, it was in 1922.
The Great Rebellion.
1006
01:29:05,412 --> 01:29:11,317
Even a lad of 15 can feel strongly
about his country's independence.
1007
01:29:18,259 --> 01:29:20,557
How nice.
1008
01:29:22,863 --> 01:29:24,626
Tell me, Mr. O'Bannion.
1009
01:29:24,799 --> 01:29:28,667
Do you think you and I
can ever get anyplace?
1010
01:29:30,671 --> 01:29:32,662
With the book, I mean.
1011
01:29:32,840 --> 01:29:35,832
Well, we've both known sorrow.
1012
01:29:36,744 --> 01:29:40,908
I feel that you and I are going
to create something.
1013
01:29:41,949 --> 01:29:44,281
Something beautiful.
1014
01:29:59,200 --> 01:30:02,966
Actually, my child, it was so sad.
Mother died in childbirth.
1015
01:30:03,137 --> 01:30:07,039
It was a dreadful thing.
And Father traveled all the time.
1016
01:30:07,208 --> 01:30:10,735
How difficult he was.
But I must be fair to Father.
1017
01:30:10,911 --> 01:30:16,349
Remind me to do a whole new chapter
about him. No, no, take that out.
1018
01:30:19,119 --> 01:30:22,020
And I had to start working
when I was 8.
1019
01:30:22,189 --> 01:30:26,387
I went next door and said,
"Can I baby-sit? Can I do something?"
1020
01:30:26,560 --> 01:30:32,499
After all, I was a child. I said,
"I need clothes. Parties. Pretties."
1021
01:30:53,988 --> 01:30:55,751
Please.
1022
01:30:56,190 --> 01:30:58,624
Please, Miss Gooch!
1023
01:31:00,094 --> 01:31:04,827
How can I court the muse
with all that clackety-clack?
1024
01:31:04,999 --> 01:31:10,904
I'm sorry. I'm only taking off
what Mrs. Burnside dictated.
1025
01:31:11,071 --> 01:31:14,700
Everything Mrs. Burnside
dictates is so wonderful.
1026
01:31:14,875 --> 01:31:18,367
When I think of the things
she's done...
1027
01:31:18,545 --> 01:31:23,107
...and think of the things
I haven't done, I could just die.
1028
01:31:23,284 --> 01:31:26,151
But it's so exciting
being in this house.
1029
01:31:26,320 --> 01:31:29,346
Just imagine, a Japanese houseboy...
1030
01:31:29,523 --> 01:31:32,549
...all those artistic friends...
1031
01:31:32,726 --> 01:31:35,786
...and you, Mr. O'Bannion.
1032
01:31:35,996 --> 01:31:39,693
I'll get it, Brian. Hello.
1033
01:31:39,867 --> 01:31:41,767
Hello, Lindsay.
1034
01:31:41,936 --> 01:31:44,097
It's coming along.
1035
01:31:44,271 --> 01:31:49,573
Well, it's only been three months.
Brian is polishing and perfecting it.
1036
01:31:49,743 --> 01:31:52,405
A party? Oh, I'd...
1037
01:31:53,580 --> 01:31:56,640
No, I'm afraid not.
Brian couldn't possibly...
1038
01:31:56,817 --> 01:31:58,808
What is it, my dear?
1039
01:31:58,986 --> 01:32:02,353
Lindsay feels that Warner Bros.
might pay for our book...
1040
01:32:02,523 --> 01:32:08,359
...as a vehicle for Bette Davis. He's
meeting Jack Warner tonight, but l...
1041
01:32:10,564 --> 01:32:14,261
Mrs. Burnside and I couldn't
possibly allow our work...
1042
01:32:14,435 --> 01:32:17,063
...to be defiled
by a movie company.
1043
01:32:17,237 --> 01:32:21,640
But, just as a courtesy,
we'll come and discuss it.
1044
01:32:22,242 --> 01:32:25,439
About 8:30? A black tie?
1045
01:32:25,612 --> 01:32:28,911
All right, and thank you very much.
Goodbye.
1046
01:32:29,083 --> 01:32:34,214
Brian, you accepted! It might do you
good to get back in the world.
1047
01:32:34,388 --> 01:32:38,381
- Here's what you dictated.
- Thank you.
1048
01:32:38,559 --> 01:32:42,495
And here's what Mr. O'Bannion edited.
1049
01:32:43,464 --> 01:32:47,457
Mr. O'Bannion and I are going to work,
so why don't you do...
1050
01:32:47,634 --> 01:32:50,102
...whatever it is you do do to relax.
1051
01:32:50,270 --> 01:32:52,204
Thank you, Mrs. Burnside.
1052
01:32:52,373 --> 01:32:56,969
I think I'll just fix myself
a Dr. Pepper.
1053
01:33:01,115 --> 01:33:04,175
I'm worried.
We have little to show Mr. Warner.
1054
01:33:04,351 --> 01:33:08,788
We'll tell him the story. How long
will it take to finish this book?
1055
01:33:08,956 --> 01:33:12,585
Flaubert spent 13 years
on Madame Bovary.
1056
01:33:14,194 --> 01:33:16,992
- Where were we?
- Give us our last sentence.
1057
01:33:17,164 --> 01:33:19,530
"My puberty in Buffalo was drab."
1058
01:33:19,700 --> 01:33:24,899
Oh, no, no. It has no majesty.
"Drab" is such a drab word.
1059
01:33:25,072 --> 01:33:30,203
How right you are, Brian.
It has no afflatus.
1060
01:33:31,879 --> 01:33:33,574
What about "bleak"?
1061
01:33:33,747 --> 01:33:37,274
Bleak? Bleak.
How bleak was my puberty.
1062
01:33:37,451 --> 01:33:41,444
Bleak Buffalo! Hear how
the words cling to each other?
1063
01:33:41,622 --> 01:33:46,252
Like a man and woman in each other's
arms. Listen to the words sing!
1064
01:33:46,427 --> 01:33:50,454
How bleak was my puberty!
1065
01:33:52,766 --> 01:33:54,700
I'm sorry.
1066
01:33:54,868 --> 01:34:00,534
Come, Mame. Let us lie down in front
of the fire and stare at the flames.
1067
01:34:00,707 --> 01:34:04,541
It will help stir the flames
of our inspiration.
1068
01:34:04,711 --> 01:34:06,906
Yes. Well, now, Brian.
1069
01:34:07,081 --> 01:34:10,812
Will the general public understand
all this symbolism?
1070
01:34:10,984 --> 01:34:13,646
"Like an echo from the caves
of Kakamora...
1071
01:34:13,821 --> 01:34:18,281
...I came forth whilst Deirdre
wept cool tears."
1072
01:34:18,459 --> 01:34:23,294
Wouldn't it be simpler to say, "The
day I was born, it rained in Buffalo"?
1073
01:34:23,464 --> 01:34:26,058
- It's drab.
- It's drab, but it's clear.
1074
01:34:26,233 --> 01:34:32,229
Here is clarity. I stayed awake half
the night to sift it from obscurity.
1075
01:34:32,406 --> 01:34:36,308
In the blank gray midnight
of me haunted garden
1076
01:34:36,477 --> 01:34:41,437
Your soft form appeared raining
kisses on the parched earth of me lips.
1077
01:34:41,615 --> 01:34:44,209
What's come over you?
Now, you mustn't!
1078
01:34:44,384 --> 01:34:48,878
Besides, it takes Agnes no time at all
to knock off a Dr. Pepper.
1079
01:34:49,223 --> 01:34:51,054
Brian, you mustn't!
1080
01:34:51,225 --> 01:34:54,820
Do not withdraw this wondrous water,
for without you...
1081
01:34:54,995 --> 01:34:57,361
I rinsed out the glass.
1082
01:34:57,531 --> 01:35:00,091
Aren't you neat?
1083
01:35:02,503 --> 01:35:07,770
It came from the fiber of my being.
That's why I'm so tired today.
1084
01:35:07,941 --> 01:35:13,538
You could revitalize me
with a single, motherly kiss.
1085
01:35:15,816 --> 01:35:17,579
What's happened to you?
1086
01:35:17,751 --> 01:35:20,652
- I'm revitalized!
- You're recharged.
1087
01:35:20,821 --> 01:35:24,655
Don't you come near me!
You're old enough to be my mother!
1088
01:35:24,825 --> 01:35:27,919
I'm going to your room...
I mean, my room. Ito!
1089
01:35:28,095 --> 01:35:32,122
- You'll kill yourself.
- What a way to die. I'm mad for you.
1090
01:35:32,299 --> 01:35:37,965
You've poured your strength into me.
And I want to pour it right back.
1091
01:35:42,676 --> 01:35:43,938
This is ridiculous.
1092
01:35:44,111 --> 01:35:48,104
It's like having a crush
on your teacher. Or your analyst.
1093
01:35:48,282 --> 01:35:50,011
Stop it!
1094
01:35:50,617 --> 01:35:52,346
Hello, anybody?
1095
01:35:52,519 --> 01:35:54,111
Patrick.
1096
01:35:54,922 --> 01:35:56,514
Hello, Auntie Mame.
1097
01:35:58,025 --> 01:36:01,756
- Hello, Dennis.
- I'm so glad to see you, darling.
1098
01:36:01,995 --> 01:36:05,522
Mrs. Burnside and I were
just working on the book.
1099
01:36:05,866 --> 01:36:10,326
- I bet that's gonna be some book.
- Why are you home from school?
1100
01:36:10,504 --> 01:36:12,165
I had to talk to you.
1101
01:36:12,339 --> 01:36:16,969
You have things to talk about.
I'll go to my room and change.
1102
01:36:19,213 --> 01:36:22,046
- His room? Is he living here?
- Of course.
1103
01:36:22,216 --> 01:36:24,650
He was living in some miserable flat.
1104
01:36:24,818 --> 01:36:27,810
Since we're working together
night and day...
1105
01:36:27,988 --> 01:36:31,048
Let me tell you something about
that spiritual Irish poet...
1106
01:36:31,225 --> 01:36:35,821
You don't have to tell me a thing.
It looks very cozy.
1107
01:36:37,030 --> 01:36:40,830
For a minute, you sounded like
someone from the Knickerbocker Bank.
1108
01:36:41,001 --> 01:36:43,970
Please get O'Bannion out of here.
Right away.
1109
01:36:44,137 --> 01:36:48,005
- I beg your pardon?
- I don't want him in this house.
1110
01:36:48,175 --> 01:36:53,135
Aren't you taking rather an imperious
tone? Mr. O'Bannion is my colleague.
1111
01:36:53,313 --> 01:36:58,148
Colleague, my foot!
Gloria would never understand...
1112
01:36:58,318 --> 01:37:01,048
Who is Gloria?
1113
01:37:01,221 --> 01:37:04,486
Auntie Mame, listen to me.
I've met a girl.
1114
01:37:04,658 --> 01:37:07,752
I've been going with her
for several months.
1115
01:37:08,862 --> 01:37:12,229
She's a very special girl, and...
1116
01:37:14,101 --> 01:37:16,831
I should have told you
about her before.
1117
01:37:17,004 --> 01:37:20,770
I would have, but I knew you
were tied up with the book...
1118
01:37:21,041 --> 01:37:22,702
...and everything.
1119
01:37:22,943 --> 01:37:25,343
And until now it wasn't definite.
1120
01:37:25,512 --> 01:37:27,480
What's definite now?
1121
01:37:27,648 --> 01:37:30,344
Gloria's the girl.
That's what's definite.
1122
01:37:30,517 --> 01:37:35,045
- You're going to meet her. Tonight.
- You didn't leave her in the car?
1123
01:37:35,222 --> 01:37:39,420
I left her at her girlfriend's house.
She wanted to spruce up.
1124
01:37:39,593 --> 01:37:43,324
- I'd better spruce up too.
- I'll bring her in 10 minutes.
1125
01:37:43,497 --> 01:37:45,624
I'll have my face all organized.
1126
01:37:45,799 --> 01:37:49,166
What did you do with
me evening slippers?
1127
01:37:49,336 --> 01:37:52,430
- It's all right. I found them.
- Wait a minute.
1128
01:37:54,441 --> 01:37:57,069
If he's still in the house...
1129
01:37:57,244 --> 01:38:00,338
...l'm not gonna bring Gloria
back here.
1130
01:38:00,514 --> 01:38:02,414
May I inquire why?
1131
01:38:03,617 --> 01:38:07,781
Gloria is a very sensitive
and well brought-up girl.
1132
01:38:07,954 --> 01:38:10,889
I don't want you flaunting
your new flames...
1133
01:38:11,058 --> 01:38:13,925
...and old peccadilloes
in front of her.
1134
01:38:15,429 --> 01:38:18,455
Then why bring her here at all?
1135
01:38:18,999 --> 01:38:22,196
Want to know the truth?
I've been trying to avoid it.
1136
01:38:22,369 --> 01:38:24,769
She wanted to meet you.
1137
01:38:25,772 --> 01:38:27,933
I see.
1138
01:38:28,108 --> 01:38:31,202
You dropped by to see
that I was all...
1139
01:38:31,378 --> 01:38:35,610
...scrubbed up and presentable
for inspection, is that it?
1140
01:38:35,782 --> 01:38:37,409
Yes.
1141
01:38:37,651 --> 01:38:40,211
And to tell you that
while she's here...
1142
01:38:40,387 --> 01:38:44,323
...for five minutes to try to act
like a normal human being.
1143
01:38:44,491 --> 01:38:47,688
Gloria's from
a very conservative family.
1144
01:38:47,961 --> 01:38:50,521
She doesn't have to know
about things...
1145
01:38:50,697 --> 01:38:53,757
...ordinary mortals
simply don't have to know about.
1146
01:38:57,404 --> 01:39:02,103
Should she know you've turned into
one of the most beastly, bourgeois...
1147
01:39:02,275 --> 01:39:06,268
...Babbitty little snobs
on the Eastern seaboard?
1148
01:39:10,083 --> 01:39:15,487
Or will you be able to make that
quite clear without any help from me?
1149
01:39:19,993 --> 01:39:22,985
Well, it's been nice knowing you.
1150
01:39:24,865 --> 01:39:26,560
Patrick?
1151
01:39:28,034 --> 01:39:29,661
Auntie Mame?
1152
01:39:31,872 --> 01:39:35,433
Darling. I love you so.
1153
01:39:35,609 --> 01:39:40,740
I'd do anything for you. I'd denounce
Calvin Coolidge as a Bolshevik.
1154
01:39:40,914 --> 01:39:45,977
Gloria had better like you or
I'll bill her one square in the chops.
1155
01:39:46,153 --> 01:39:52,092
I'll get him out of here and have
the whole place fumigated. I promise.
1156
01:40:04,137 --> 01:40:06,435
Thanks, Auntie Mame.
1157
01:40:29,162 --> 01:40:30,823
Brian?
1158
01:40:34,334 --> 01:40:38,600
- Why aren't you dressed?
- Would you mind going without me?
1159
01:40:38,772 --> 01:40:41,764
- You want me to go alone?
- Something came up.
1160
01:40:41,942 --> 01:40:47,312
Hurry up and get dressed.
I am not going to that party alone.
1161
01:41:05,765 --> 01:41:12,068
If there's nothing more you wanted,
I just thought I'd go up to my room.
1162
01:41:16,209 --> 01:41:18,268
Agnes.
1163
01:41:24,317 --> 01:41:26,751
I wonder.
1164
01:41:26,987 --> 01:41:30,388
Is anything wrong, Mrs. Burnside?
1165
01:41:33,627 --> 01:41:36,926
- You're coming out.
- Where?
1166
01:41:37,097 --> 01:41:39,622
You know, you have
very beautiful eyes.
1167
01:41:39,799 --> 01:41:42,233
Take these glasses off forever.
1168
01:41:42,402 --> 01:41:44,768
I can't see out of my right eye.
1169
01:41:44,938 --> 01:41:48,704
Then look out of your left one.
Now, now, now, now.
1170
01:41:49,242 --> 01:41:52,109
You do have a bust!
1171
01:41:52,279 --> 01:41:55,680
Where have you been hiding that
all these months?
1172
01:41:55,849 --> 01:41:58,784
- What do you call those?
- Orthopedic Oxfords.
1173
01:41:58,952 --> 01:42:02,410
Kick them off. Now take
off your clothes. Norah, lto!
1174
01:42:02,589 --> 01:42:05,080
There's a man in the house.
1175
01:42:05,258 --> 01:42:08,989
Will you stop being a goose
and get these clothes off?
1176
01:42:09,162 --> 01:42:12,495
Norah? lto? Where are you
when I need you?
1177
01:42:12,666 --> 01:42:17,433
I don't have a very clear picture
of what's going on.
1178
01:42:17,604 --> 01:42:19,572
Now, Agnes, dear...
1179
01:42:19,739 --> 01:42:24,073
...I am sending you to that party
tonight with Mr. O'Bannion.
1180
01:42:24,244 --> 01:42:28,442
I couldn't. I'm too nervous!
1181
01:42:28,848 --> 01:42:31,373
This will calm you down.
1182
01:42:31,551 --> 01:42:35,146
Oh, no! Spirits do
the most terrible things to me.
1183
01:42:35,322 --> 01:42:39,258
- I'm not the same girl.
- What's wrong with that?
1184
01:42:39,426 --> 01:42:41,519
Will it mix with Dr. Pepper?
1185
01:42:41,695 --> 01:42:44,255
He'll love it. Drink!
1186
01:42:45,665 --> 01:42:48,065
Norah, go get my black Patou velvet.
1187
01:42:48,234 --> 01:42:51,829
Ito, lay out my cosmetics,
my cold cream, everything.
1188
01:42:52,005 --> 01:42:55,497
You see, me be Charlie of the Ritz.
1189
01:42:56,509 --> 01:42:58,033
Come, child.
1190
01:42:58,211 --> 01:43:03,513
I think I know what you want me to do.
I'm not a bit sure I want to do it.
1191
01:43:03,683 --> 01:43:05,446
Agnes, where is your spine?
1192
01:43:05,619 --> 01:43:09,316
You've taken my dictation for weeks and
you don't get the message of my book.
1193
01:43:09,489 --> 01:43:11,719
- Live, that's the message.
- Live?
1194
01:43:11,891 --> 01:43:15,884
Yes! Life is a banquet and
most poor suckers are starving.
1195
01:43:16,062 --> 01:43:20,396
Now, come on, Agnes, live!
Come, child. Live!
1196
01:43:31,378 --> 01:43:33,403
The whole place has gone nuts.
1197
01:43:33,580 --> 01:43:37,573
She'll never make a silk purse
out of that sow's ear.
1198
01:43:39,519 --> 01:43:42,215
Mrs. Burnside, I can't breathe!
1199
01:43:42,389 --> 01:43:47,383
Good, good. If you can breathe,
it isn't tight enough.
1200
01:43:49,729 --> 01:43:54,132
- And why aren't you dressed?
- I am not going to that party tonight.
1201
01:43:54,300 --> 01:43:58,794
Then I'm not going either.
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!
1202
01:43:58,972 --> 01:44:03,739
Well, you can use the Duesenberg.
1203
01:44:05,679 --> 01:44:08,842
And I have a date for you.
1204
01:44:09,049 --> 01:44:10,676
Agnes?
1205
01:44:11,518 --> 01:44:14,851
Agnes?! You can't expect...
1206
01:44:15,021 --> 01:44:18,218
Would you ask Toscanini
to lead a harmonica band?
1207
01:44:18,391 --> 01:44:21,656
I won't take Gooch,
she's an offense to the sight.
1208
01:44:21,828 --> 01:44:25,730
It's good her mother, the Countess
de Gooch, can't hear you.
1209
01:44:25,899 --> 01:44:27,958
She'd pull your beard.
1210
01:44:28,134 --> 01:44:31,331
Countess? You're joking.
1211
01:44:31,504 --> 01:44:35,941
Surely you've heard of the de Gooches?
Second wealthiest bankers.
1212
01:44:36,109 --> 01:44:39,101
Fabulous estate at Newport.
1213
01:44:39,279 --> 01:44:43,978
This child is just doing this
for a little literary experience.
1214
01:44:44,150 --> 01:44:47,085
Agnes. No, no, no.
1215
01:44:47,253 --> 01:44:51,917
Agnes, head up, dear.
Shoulders back. Tummy in.
1216
01:44:52,759 --> 01:44:56,217
Agnes, tonight you are
queen of Romania.
1217
01:45:05,105 --> 01:45:10,338
Agnes. On your feet.
Darling, you look divine.
1218
01:45:10,510 --> 01:45:13,843
- Do I really?
- Yes, now come along.
1219
01:45:15,715 --> 01:45:18,013
Enchanting.
1220
01:45:19,652 --> 01:45:21,552
Golly.
1221
01:45:21,988 --> 01:45:24,980
Hang those furs on the Gooch. Hurry.
1222
01:45:29,129 --> 01:45:33,623
Auntie Mame, Gloria Upson.
This is my Auntie Mame, Mrs. Burnside.
1223
01:45:33,800 --> 01:45:38,362
I can't tell you how pleased
I am to make your acquaintance.
1224
01:45:38,538 --> 01:45:41,905
Yes. Come in, children.
Do, please.
1225
01:45:42,776 --> 01:45:45,472
There's some friends
I'd like you to meet.
1226
01:45:45,645 --> 01:45:49,741
This is my secretary, Miss Gooch.
My Boswell, as it were.
1227
01:45:49,916 --> 01:45:54,216
Miss Upson and my nephew, Patrick.
What is your boyfriend's name?
1228
01:45:54,387 --> 01:45:56,855
O'Bannion. Mr. O'Bannion.
1229
01:45:57,023 --> 01:46:00,686
Well, now, you two run along
and have a good time.
1230
01:46:00,860 --> 01:46:04,159
Well, good night!
1231
01:46:05,999 --> 01:46:09,901
I can't tell you how pleased I am
to have met you, Mr. O'Bannion.
1232
01:46:10,069 --> 01:46:12,003
And Miss Boswell.
1233
01:46:13,573 --> 01:46:17,236
Well, Patrick tells me
how special you are to him.
1234
01:46:17,410 --> 01:46:21,176
That means you're very special
to me too.
1235
01:46:21,881 --> 01:46:25,373
- My, what a stunning apartment.
- Thank you.
1236
01:46:25,552 --> 01:46:28,749
Books are awfully decorative,
don't you think?
1237
01:46:28,922 --> 01:46:30,947
Won't you sit down?
1238
01:46:31,124 --> 01:46:35,254
- Can I get you something? A cognac?
- Another hot chocolate?
1239
01:46:35,428 --> 01:46:40,491
Not a thing. On our way to Bunny's,
my friend who lives on Park Avenue...
1240
01:46:40,667 --> 01:46:44,433
...Patrick and I just stuffed
ourselves at Schrafft's.
1241
01:46:44,604 --> 01:46:47,437
Do you know what
your silly nephew did?
1242
01:46:47,607 --> 01:46:50,633
He spoke French to the counterman.
1243
01:46:50,810 --> 01:46:56,339
Imagine anybody speaking French
to a counterman at Schrafft's.
1244
01:46:56,583 --> 01:46:58,915
Showoff.
1245
01:47:03,122 --> 01:47:07,183
If nobody minds,
I think I'll have something.
1246
01:47:07,627 --> 01:47:10,824
You're at school, dear?
1247
01:47:11,531 --> 01:47:14,295
I'm an Upper Richmond
Girls' School girl.
1248
01:47:14,467 --> 01:47:17,903
How did you get that lovely tan
so early in spring?
1249
01:47:18,071 --> 01:47:20,596
I played hooky for a couple of weeks.
1250
01:47:20,773 --> 01:47:25,574
Mums and Daddums and I went
to our place in Fort Lauderdale.
1251
01:47:25,745 --> 01:47:28,976
I was out of my mind
until she got back.
1252
01:47:29,148 --> 01:47:33,312
I'm insanely jealous of this kid.
It's torture and I love it.
1253
01:47:33,486 --> 01:47:35,044
Silly.
1254
01:47:41,160 --> 01:47:45,119
Tell me, dear, have you
chosen your major yet?
1255
01:47:46,699 --> 01:47:49,065
Chosen my major?
1256
01:47:49,235 --> 01:47:52,329
What courses are you taking
at college?
1257
01:47:52,505 --> 01:47:57,602
Just a general sort of liberal arts
thing. English Lit and like that.
1258
01:47:57,777 --> 01:48:02,578
Upper Richmond's top drawer.
Really top drawer.
1259
01:48:05,251 --> 01:48:08,277
How did you two ever get acquainted?
1260
01:48:08,488 --> 01:48:10,854
Uncle Dwight introduced us.
1261
01:48:11,024 --> 01:48:13,720
Uncle Dwight? Oh, yes.
1262
01:48:14,661 --> 01:48:16,993
Well, he's not really my uncle.
1263
01:48:17,163 --> 01:48:21,327
But he's been a close friend
of the family since I was a girl...
1264
01:48:21,501 --> 01:48:24,129
...with braces on my teeth.
1265
01:48:25,038 --> 01:48:27,598
One day I must meet Mums and Daddums.
1266
01:48:27,807 --> 01:48:30,332
We won't bother you with family stuff.
1267
01:48:30,510 --> 01:48:34,207
Naturally, we'll expect you
at the wedding.
1268
01:48:35,348 --> 01:48:37,543
The wedding?
1269
01:48:38,117 --> 01:48:39,778
Is there a wedding?
1270
01:48:39,953 --> 01:48:43,821
I told you it was definite,
Auntie Mame.
1271
01:48:45,091 --> 01:48:48,527
Well, it's awfully good of you
to let me know.
1272
01:48:49,662 --> 01:48:53,792
We've decided on a September wedding
at our place in Montebank.
1273
01:48:53,967 --> 01:48:59,030
September?
Tell me, just where is Montebank?
1274
01:48:59,205 --> 01:49:01,639
It's above Darien. You'll love it.
1275
01:49:01,808 --> 01:49:05,141
It's awfully pretty
and terribly handy to the city.
1276
01:49:05,311 --> 01:49:08,474
Of course, it's completely restricted.
1277
01:49:10,216 --> 01:49:12,150
I'll get a blood test.
1278
01:49:12,318 --> 01:49:15,617
We'd better hurry
to catch that Italian picture.
1279
01:49:15,788 --> 01:49:20,953
Those awful foreign movies.
What I go through for your nephew.
1280
01:49:21,127 --> 01:49:23,493
But he is kind of cute, isn't he?
1281
01:49:23,663 --> 01:49:25,597
Yes, isn't he?
1282
01:49:26,232 --> 01:49:29,030
I'm pleased to have made
your acquaintance.
1283
01:49:29,202 --> 01:49:30,931
Thank you, dear.
1284
01:49:33,306 --> 01:49:35,274
Well? Isn't she terrific?
1285
01:49:36,009 --> 01:49:38,000
Yes, dear. Yes, she is.
1286
01:49:38,444 --> 01:49:43,677
So are you, Auntie Mame.
You're really top drawer. I mean...
1287
01:49:44,250 --> 01:49:46,775
Well, you know what I mean.
1288
01:49:52,925 --> 01:49:57,328
Now, why did I ever buy him
those long pants?
1289
01:50:06,873 --> 01:50:11,572
Hang on to the red dye pot. I may
want it after visiting the Upsons.
1290
01:50:11,744 --> 01:50:14,838
It's just what you wanted.
Respectable.
1291
01:50:15,014 --> 01:50:17,608
If a bit drab.
Did you bring the car?
1292
01:50:17,784 --> 01:50:21,845
I go to garage. No Duesenberg.
Mr. O'Bannion no bring back.
1293
01:50:22,021 --> 01:50:24,683
I hope nothing has happened...
To Agnes.
1294
01:50:24,857 --> 01:50:29,760
I'll call Mr. Lindsay and borrow one.
Don't forget the maps and martinis.
1295
01:50:34,167 --> 01:50:36,829
What happened, Missy Gooch?
1296
01:50:37,470 --> 01:50:38,960
I lived.
1297
01:50:39,138 --> 01:50:40,901
What kind party was that?
1298
01:50:41,074 --> 01:50:46,535
I don't remember. All that champagne,
I don't remember a thing.
1299
01:50:46,712 --> 01:50:50,978
I think we went to a movie.
Yeah, there was a wedding in it.
1300
01:50:51,150 --> 01:50:53,846
And Gary Cooper was the groom.
1301
01:50:54,020 --> 01:50:57,786
I don't remember who the girl was,
but it made me cry.
1302
01:50:57,957 --> 01:50:59,549
Where's Mrs. Burnside?
1303
01:50:59,725 --> 01:51:02,785
She get ready for Connecticut.
Where Duesenberg?
1304
01:51:02,962 --> 01:51:07,558
I don't know. Mr. O'Bannion said
he just had to meet my mother.
1305
01:51:07,733 --> 01:51:12,796
Then we got on the Staten Island Ferry
and he disappeared.
1306
01:51:12,972 --> 01:51:15,941
I've got to see Mrs. Burnside
before she goes.
1307
01:51:16,109 --> 01:51:17,838
Is anything wrong?
1308
01:51:18,010 --> 01:51:22,071
I did just what she told me. I lived.
1309
01:51:22,248 --> 01:51:25,979
I've gotta find out what to do now.
1310
01:51:44,137 --> 01:51:48,164
I think it's a very good match
for our little Gloria.
1311
01:51:48,341 --> 01:51:51,572
Why didn't Dwight want us
to meet the aunt?
1312
01:51:51,744 --> 01:51:54,406
We never would have
if she hadn't phoned.
1313
01:51:54,580 --> 01:51:58,676
I'm glad she did.
I've been dying to get a look at her.
1314
01:51:58,851 --> 01:52:02,548
- Where is she now?
- Freshening up in the guest room.
1315
01:52:02,722 --> 01:52:06,715
That certainly is an expensive outfit
she's wearing.
1316
01:52:06,893 --> 01:52:10,124
I looked at the label in her coat.
1317
01:52:10,730 --> 01:52:14,029
I'll bet she's better fixed
than Dwight figured.
1318
01:52:14,200 --> 01:52:18,068
I hope it's all right to have
a cocktail hour in the patio.
1319
01:52:18,237 --> 01:52:20,797
She may think we live like gypsies.
1320
01:52:21,107 --> 01:52:24,838
You show me a gypsy
that lives like we do.
1321
01:52:26,012 --> 01:52:31,245
Claude, you be genteel
in front of Mrs. Burnside.
1322
01:52:33,653 --> 01:52:35,587
That must be she.
1323
01:52:35,755 --> 01:52:39,054
We're out here on the patio,
Mrs. Burnside.
1324
01:52:41,427 --> 01:52:44,260
What a delightful spot you have here.
1325
01:52:44,430 --> 01:52:46,523
We adore Montebank.
1326
01:52:46,699 --> 01:52:50,635
Of course, we always spend summers
at our camp in the Adirondacks.
1327
01:52:50,803 --> 01:52:54,569
We call it Upson Pines.
We leave next week.
1328
01:52:54,740 --> 01:52:58,232
There's one thing we ought
to get straight right off.
1329
01:52:58,411 --> 01:53:02,006
You do take a little nip,
now and then?
1330
01:53:03,216 --> 01:53:05,707
On festive occasions.
1331
01:53:05,885 --> 01:53:07,477
Good!
1332
01:53:07,653 --> 01:53:10,622
I'll have an Upson daiquiri
ready in a minute.
1333
01:53:10,990 --> 01:53:15,950
I can't get over the thought you've
given every detail of your house.
1334
01:53:16,128 --> 01:53:21,293
We've done all we could to make it
seem like authentic Colonial America.
1335
01:53:21,467 --> 01:53:25,062
And how well you've succeeded.
1336
01:53:25,238 --> 01:53:29,698
Those enchanting miniatures in the
powder room of John Quincy Adams.
1337
01:53:29,875 --> 01:53:33,038
- Did you see our driveway signpost?
- I did.
1338
01:53:33,212 --> 01:53:37,842
What a divine name you've
given this place, Upson Downs.
1339
01:53:38,017 --> 01:53:41,145
- I'll bet you thought of that.
- That was Claude.
1340
01:53:41,320 --> 01:53:45,416
I'm just a homebody.
Claude is the clever one.
1341
01:53:47,927 --> 01:53:50,691
- Now, Mrs. Upson...
- Doris, dear.
1342
01:53:50,863 --> 01:53:54,458
Doris, dear.
Well, you must call me Mame.
1343
01:53:54,634 --> 01:53:56,727
Mamie.
1344
01:53:56,936 --> 01:53:58,164
Mame.
1345
01:53:58,337 --> 01:54:01,829
Well, Mamie old girl,
here's your poison.
1346
01:54:02,008 --> 01:54:06,911
I use a secret ingredient I learned
from a native in Havana, Cuba.
1347
01:54:07,079 --> 01:54:11,140
You'll never guess what
that secret ingredient is.
1348
01:54:11,317 --> 01:54:16,619
I'll say this much, there's no sugar
in a Claude Upson daiquiri.
1349
01:54:17,790 --> 01:54:21,624
And yet it's so sweet.
1350
01:54:22,561 --> 01:54:25,325
Whatever do you use?
1351
01:54:25,498 --> 01:54:28,023
Chocolate ice cream?
1352
01:54:31,070 --> 01:54:33,300
Say, that's rich!
1353
01:54:33,472 --> 01:54:37,203
Did you hear that, Doris?
Chocolate ice cream!
1354
01:54:40,813 --> 01:54:45,614
Since you're practically one of the
family, I'll let you in on my secret.
1355
01:54:45,785 --> 01:54:47,252
Honey.
1356
01:54:48,654 --> 01:54:50,053
I beg pardon?
1357
01:54:50,222 --> 01:54:52,884
Strained honey. That's the secret.
1358
01:54:54,226 --> 01:54:58,595
Of course, I use quite
a little rum too.
1359
01:55:04,236 --> 01:55:08,104
Now, Mamie, I've made these
especially for you, dear.
1360
01:55:08,574 --> 01:55:12,066
Oh, my! Don't they look delicious?
1361
01:55:12,244 --> 01:55:15,509
Well, well, well.
1362
01:55:18,451 --> 01:55:21,011
What are they?
1363
01:55:21,187 --> 01:55:25,021
I put two cans of tuna fish
through the meat grinder...
1364
01:55:25,191 --> 01:55:28,092
...then add clam juice
and peanut butter.
1365
01:55:28,260 --> 01:55:30,820
It's a recipe from
Ladies' Home Journal.
1366
01:55:30,996 --> 01:55:33,556
These are plain Jack
cheese and chutney.
1367
01:55:33,733 --> 01:55:38,170
Now, sit you down, Mamie.
I've something special to show you.
1368
01:55:38,337 --> 01:55:40,862
Baby pictures of Gloria?
1369
01:55:41,040 --> 01:55:43,702
The whole family, more or less.
1370
01:55:43,876 --> 01:55:47,312
On a bear rug. Isn't that precious?
1371
01:55:47,480 --> 01:55:50,938
Better not let Patrick see that one.
1372
01:55:57,189 --> 01:56:01,592
That's Miss Tuttail,
Little Glory's first school teacher.
1373
01:56:01,761 --> 01:56:04,491
I think the light
was hurting her eyes.
1374
01:56:04,663 --> 01:56:07,188
Enough of this girly-girly talk.
1375
01:56:07,366 --> 01:56:11,359
Since we have Mamie here,
we ought to let her know the plans.
1376
01:56:11,537 --> 01:56:13,505
- Plans?
- For Patrick's career.
1377
01:56:13,672 --> 01:56:16,163
Dwight Babcock and I
have that coordinated.
1378
01:56:16,342 --> 01:56:19,311
After the honeymoon,
I want Patrick to choose.
1379
01:56:19,478 --> 01:56:24,939
I can slip him into a berth on Madison
Avenue or a seat on the stock exchange.
1380
01:56:25,117 --> 01:56:28,780
A seat and a berth...
Pardon me. I'm so sorry.
1381
01:56:28,954 --> 01:56:34,449
Mamie, you're a pretty fast drinker.
Don't worry, I'm way ahead of you.
1382
01:56:34,627 --> 01:56:38,222
- You don't happen to like gin, do you?
- I adore it.
1383
01:56:38,397 --> 01:56:41,457
After dinner,
we'll get out the cards and play.
1384
01:56:41,634 --> 01:56:46,628
Now we come to the problem of the
wedding present. I have that settled.
1385
01:56:46,806 --> 01:56:48,831
Now, here's my idea, Mamie:
1386
01:56:49,008 --> 01:56:53,308
Why don't you and I get together
and buy the newlyweds that?
1387
01:56:53,512 --> 01:56:56,140
- What?
- That lot, right next door.
1388
01:56:56,382 --> 01:56:58,816
Wouldn't that make a wedding present?
1389
01:56:58,984 --> 01:57:02,442
We could take out this wall
and join our patios.
1390
01:57:02,621 --> 01:57:05,249
You couldn't tell where one left off.
1391
01:57:05,424 --> 01:57:09,827
You wouldn't be losing a daughter.
You'd be gaining a patio.
1392
01:57:10,996 --> 01:57:15,092
We gotta work fast. There's
people bidding on that property.
1393
01:57:15,267 --> 01:57:17,064
The wrong kind.
1394
01:57:17,236 --> 01:57:20,000
A fellow named Epstein.
Abraham Epstein.
1395
01:57:20,172 --> 01:57:24,472
The cellist? How lucky you are.
All that glorious music next door!
1396
01:57:24,643 --> 01:57:26,508
And she's a darling.
1397
01:57:26,679 --> 01:57:30,274
I guess you don't understand
quite how it is here.
1398
01:57:30,449 --> 01:57:34,180
This section is restricted
only up to our property line.
1399
01:57:34,353 --> 01:57:37,481
We feel we have an obligation
to make sure...
1400
01:57:37,656 --> 01:57:40,181
Well, you know.
1401
01:57:40,926 --> 01:57:45,295
I'll tell you what. I'll buy it
and we'll divvy it up 50-50.
1402
01:57:45,464 --> 01:57:48,900
You won't have to worry about a thing.
1403
01:57:53,606 --> 01:57:55,904
My, my, my.
1404
01:57:56,375 --> 01:57:59,071
You've thought of everything,
haven't you?
1405
01:57:59,245 --> 01:58:01,645
Laid out Patrick's career.
1406
01:58:01,814 --> 01:58:04,112
Planned the wedding.
1407
01:58:04,917 --> 01:58:08,478
Even chosen my gift.
1408
01:58:10,556 --> 01:58:14,583
Well, I guess there's only
one thing left for me to do.
1409
01:58:14,760 --> 01:58:16,125
What's that?
1410
01:58:16,295 --> 01:58:21,562
When you get back from Prickly Pines,
I'll give an intimate family dinner.
1411
01:58:21,734 --> 01:58:24,532
Well, how about that?
1412
01:58:24,703 --> 01:58:27,729
Say, you're a good scout, Mamie.
1413
01:58:27,907 --> 01:58:31,240
By golly, you're top drawer!
1414
01:58:42,922 --> 01:58:46,358
Well, that's a very
interesting design...
1415
01:58:46,525 --> 01:58:50,393
...but are you sure you planned it
with that end up?
1416
01:58:53,232 --> 01:58:58,295
That is the beauty of it, madam.
It can be used upside down.
1417
01:59:18,891 --> 01:59:21,826
Just leave it outside, please.
1418
01:59:23,162 --> 01:59:26,222
I'm so sorry.
You must be Patrick Dennis.
1419
01:59:26,398 --> 01:59:29,094
Guilty. Are you guilty of all of this?
1420
01:59:29,268 --> 01:59:33,295
I'm not the decorator. I'm your
aunt's secretary, Pegeen Ryan.
1421
01:59:33,472 --> 01:59:36,100
- How do you do?
- Hello.
1422
01:59:37,543 --> 01:59:40,774
I'm sorry, I didn't know.
I was away all summer.
1423
01:59:40,946 --> 01:59:44,074
A lot of changes here.
Leave it to Auntie Mame.
1424
01:59:44,249 --> 01:59:48,345
- Where'd she get this stuff?
- It's the only set in the universe.
1425
01:59:48,520 --> 01:59:52,650
It's made by the famous
Danish designer, Yul Uhlu.
1426
01:59:52,825 --> 01:59:54,622
Who?
1427
01:59:54,793 --> 01:59:57,956
Yul Uhlu.
1428
01:59:58,130 --> 02:00:01,725
Say that to the right fella
and you'll get kissed.
1429
02:00:03,235 --> 02:00:07,365
Incidentally, congratulations.
I hear you're getting married.
1430
02:00:07,539 --> 02:00:10,736
A week from next Tuesday.
The old ball and chain.
1431
02:00:10,909 --> 02:00:14,936
I wish I had said that. Or,
"The first 100 years are the hardest."
1432
02:00:15,114 --> 02:00:18,845
Good one. How about,
"Marriage is a great institution"?
1433
02:00:19,018 --> 02:00:22,920
"Yeah, but who wants
to be in an institution?"
1434
02:00:24,857 --> 02:00:27,553
Well, that's enough of that.
1435
02:00:27,726 --> 02:00:31,890
Patrick. Patrick, my little love!
1436
02:00:33,666 --> 02:00:37,727
I'm glad to see you. Did you have
a good time at Upson Pines?
1437
02:00:37,903 --> 02:00:40,997
I had a wonderful time.
What is the idea of...?
1438
02:00:41,173 --> 02:00:45,610
- Not now. I have to go to Montebank.
- They adored you but...
1439
02:00:45,778 --> 02:00:50,272
I'm so relieved. I want everything
to be extra special tonight...
1440
02:00:50,449 --> 02:00:53,816
...and give the Upsons
as cozy a time as they gave me.
1441
02:00:53,986 --> 02:00:56,546
- Now, Pegeen, dear...
- I forgot the horror.
1442
02:00:56,722 --> 02:00:59,885
- Will someone help me with the ladder?
- Of course.
1443
02:01:00,059 --> 02:01:04,962
Fish food. Where's the fish food?
Oh, dear, dear, dear.
1444
02:01:05,130 --> 02:01:09,032
Don't nibble on the hors d'oeuvres.
You'll get fat.
1445
02:01:09,201 --> 02:01:14,537
I'm sorry, Mrs. Burnside.
I try to do exactly as you say.
1446
02:01:14,707 --> 02:01:18,541
Come and get it.
Come along, come along.
1447
02:01:18,744 --> 02:01:20,803
You're so wonderful.
1448
02:01:20,979 --> 02:01:24,813
Nobody else would've taken me in,
an outcast of society.
1449
02:01:24,983 --> 02:01:30,011
I'm grateful! You've given me a new
interest, now that I'm losing Patrick.
1450
02:01:30,189 --> 02:01:34,353
- I wish I had someone to look after.
- You will, dear, you will.
1451
02:01:34,526 --> 02:01:38,929
- Where do you want this set up?
- Right there will be fine.
1452
02:01:39,898 --> 02:01:43,163
- What's that supposed to be?
- You don't like it?
1453
02:01:43,335 --> 02:01:46,793
It might be a little avant-garde
for the Upsons.
1454
02:01:46,972 --> 02:01:50,772
Take it right down.
I want everything to be perfect.
1455
02:01:50,943 --> 02:01:55,778
- I think it's very unusual.
- Agnes! What is she doing here?
1456
02:01:55,948 --> 02:02:00,647
- Where else, in her condition?
- The Upsons will not understand.
1457
02:02:00,819 --> 02:02:04,152
- Perhaps they won't notice.
- Won't notice?
1458
02:02:04,323 --> 02:02:06,348
They're here. They're here.
1459
02:02:06,525 --> 02:02:09,426
- Help me get this down.
- Help her, darling.
1460
02:02:09,595 --> 02:02:14,555
- Leave it. Get the ladder out of here.
- Norah, lto, somebody answer the door!
1461
02:02:14,733 --> 02:02:16,667
- I'll get it.
- No, you don't!
1462
02:02:16,835 --> 02:02:22,068
- He's right. Go and stay in your room.
- But what will I do?
1463
02:02:22,241 --> 02:02:28,510
Sleep, knit, start making up names:
Rudolph, Abigail, Beulah, anything.
1464
02:02:39,424 --> 02:02:43,087
Welcome to the Burnside fireside.
1465
02:02:43,262 --> 02:02:46,959
How I have looked forward
to this evening! Come in.
1466
02:02:47,132 --> 02:02:52,001
- And Claude.
- Good to see you, Mamie!
1467
02:02:52,171 --> 02:02:55,902
- And little Glory.
- I'm so pleased to see you again.
1468
02:02:56,074 --> 02:02:57,507
Yes, dear.
1469
02:02:58,977 --> 02:03:01,207
Say!
1470
02:03:01,380 --> 02:03:04,406
My, my, my, my, my!
1471
02:03:04,583 --> 02:03:09,043
- Hi, everybody.
- Well, hello, son.
1472
02:03:09,454 --> 02:03:11,615
Patrick.
1473
02:03:11,790 --> 02:03:16,250
- Gloria.
- I made up a joke on the way up.
1474
02:03:16,428 --> 02:03:17,588
Listen to this:
1475
02:03:17,763 --> 02:03:23,224
Why is an elevator man's job
like my place in Connecticut?
1476
02:03:23,402 --> 02:03:26,599
- Give up?
- Almost.
1477
02:03:26,772 --> 02:03:31,675
I'll tell you. Because it has
its ups and down.
1478
02:03:31,844 --> 02:03:34,278
You get it? Upson Downs!
1479
02:03:36,915 --> 02:03:41,579
- Clever. Clever.
- Oh, well.
1480
02:03:41,753 --> 02:03:44,620
- Do sit down.
- Thank you.
1481
02:03:46,391 --> 02:03:51,727
Doris, you're not comfortable.
These are all marvelously adjustable.
1482
02:03:51,897 --> 02:03:55,526
This is the master control.
Each chair has its cord.
1483
02:03:55,701 --> 02:04:00,434
Now, let me see, Doris.
You are number four. Now, here we go.
1484
02:04:03,675 --> 02:04:06,576
So sorry, Claude, you are number four.
1485
02:04:06,745 --> 02:04:09,236
Doris, you must be number five.
1486
02:04:09,414 --> 02:04:15,375
Patrick, you're confusing me.
Doris, here you are. Five, going up.
1487
02:04:15,554 --> 02:04:17,351
There we go.
1488
02:04:19,892 --> 02:04:22,486
Isn't it wonderful?
So easy to sweep under.
1489
02:04:22,661 --> 02:04:27,121
Claude, here we go. Hang on
to your seat belts. Down we go.
1490
02:04:27,299 --> 02:04:31,201
My, what supple legs you have.
You must have studied yoga.
1491
02:04:31,370 --> 02:04:33,565
Here are the drinks.
1492
02:04:33,739 --> 02:04:36,469
So sorry, Doris dear.
1493
02:04:36,642 --> 02:04:42,842
Going down to the main floor.
Cigars, cigarettes, lingerie, hardware.
1494
02:04:46,985 --> 02:04:49,613
Well, now, Patrick.
1495
02:04:50,289 --> 02:04:53,520
And little Glory.
1496
02:04:54,359 --> 02:04:56,384
And here's Uncle Dwight.
1497
02:04:56,561 --> 02:04:59,894
- Claude.
- Dwight!
1498
02:05:00,065 --> 02:05:02,295
Well, how are you?
1499
02:05:02,467 --> 02:05:05,300
- Mr. Babcock.
- Mrs. Burnside.
1500
02:05:05,470 --> 02:05:08,496
We must have that game of golf soon.
1501
02:05:09,474 --> 02:05:11,169
My, my, my, my, my.
1502
02:05:11,343 --> 02:05:17,339
We'll have to take that up a bit.
Pegeen, better bring the ladder again.
1503
02:05:17,516 --> 02:05:20,417
- Won't you sit down, Mr. Babcock?
- Thank you.
1504
02:05:20,919 --> 02:05:24,514
They're almost ready.
The spécialité de la maison.
1505
02:05:24,690 --> 02:05:28,456
- I want you to meet Miss Pegeen Ryan.
- How do you do?
1506
02:05:28,627 --> 02:05:32,188
Take it up. It seems to be
getting in peoples' hair.
1507
02:05:34,833 --> 02:05:36,494
- Claude.
- Thank you.
1508
02:05:36,668 --> 02:05:38,966
And Doris.
1509
02:05:39,137 --> 02:05:44,006
Claude, I'm not going to tell you
one thing that's in these drinks...
1510
02:05:44,176 --> 02:05:48,875
...because all the ingredients
are secret.
1511
02:05:49,047 --> 02:05:52,016
Now, now, now, just hang on.
1512
02:05:54,019 --> 02:05:57,079
Well, what do you know?
1513
02:05:57,255 --> 02:05:59,951
The trick is to drink them up fast...
1514
02:06:00,125 --> 02:06:03,925
...before all the alcohol burns away.
1515
02:06:05,163 --> 02:06:10,226
Don't you worry about a thing, Claude.
I'm fully covered by fire insurance.
1516
02:06:11,069 --> 02:06:16,268
Well, now, Patrick. Here.
And little Glory.
1517
02:06:16,441 --> 02:06:20,275
My friend who may drop in later
calls it the Flaming Mame.
1518
02:06:20,445 --> 02:06:24,040
- Who? Who is coming?
- Just family, darling.
1519
02:06:26,785 --> 02:06:31,518
Don't be a scaredy-cat.
There's nothing to be frightened of.
1520
02:06:31,690 --> 02:06:33,851
There, now.
1521
02:06:34,159 --> 02:06:36,286
Are we all lit?
1522
02:06:37,095 --> 02:06:41,225
- Mr. Upson, can I fix you a daiquiri?
- No. Not for a minute.
1523
02:06:41,400 --> 02:06:45,564
Your Aunt Mamie made this for me,
and I'm gonna drink it.
1524
02:06:45,737 --> 02:06:48,262
It looks just fine.
1525
02:06:52,544 --> 02:06:56,071
This is spicy.
Try one of the striped ones, Mums.
1526
02:06:56,248 --> 02:06:58,910
- These are tasty.
- What are they, dear?
1527
02:06:59,084 --> 02:07:02,815
Just plain old pickled rattlesnake.
1528
02:07:09,928 --> 02:07:13,989
Pure protein. They're marinated
after they remove the fangs.
1529
02:07:14,166 --> 02:07:16,066
Mr. Babcock, you've gone out.
1530
02:07:16,234 --> 02:07:19,567
Don't bother, Mrs. Burnside.
1531
02:07:23,308 --> 02:07:25,208
Agnes.
1532
02:07:25,544 --> 02:07:30,038
Agnes, I told you to stay
in your room.
1533
02:07:30,215 --> 02:07:33,651
But it's a quarter past 8,
and you told me...
1534
02:07:33,819 --> 02:07:37,255
I told you to take your pills
a quarter past 8.
1535
02:07:37,422 --> 02:07:42,655
- My calcium pills are in the kitchen.
- Now, now, come, dear.
1536
02:07:43,128 --> 02:07:46,791
- Is that a member of the family?
- Darned if I know.
1537
02:07:46,965 --> 02:07:50,924
It's a member of somebody's family.
1538
02:07:54,806 --> 02:07:59,937
I would like you to meet my former
secretary. She's a little bit...
1539
02:08:00,112 --> 02:08:02,580
She's not quite herself
at the moment.
1540
02:08:02,914 --> 02:08:07,112
Now, we know all about these
women's things, don't we?
1541
02:08:07,285 --> 02:08:11,415
- What's your name, dear?
- Gooch.
1542
02:08:12,057 --> 02:08:16,323
You sit right over here
beside me, Mrs. Gooch.
1543
02:08:36,448 --> 02:08:38,882
And what does Mr. Gooch do?
1544
02:08:39,050 --> 02:08:42,747
Oh, my father passed on.
1545
02:08:42,988 --> 02:08:46,719
Oh, no. I mean your husband.
1546
02:08:48,226 --> 02:08:53,425
Now, now, Agnes. Upsy-daisy.
Calcium time, darling.
1547
02:08:53,698 --> 02:08:55,723
Pegeen, dear.
1548
02:08:55,901 --> 02:09:01,305
Auntie Mame is big-hearted
when anybody is in trouble.
1549
02:09:01,473 --> 02:09:03,532
I can see that.
1550
02:09:03,708 --> 02:09:07,405
- Vera and Lindsay.
- Mame, darling.
1551
02:09:07,579 --> 02:09:10,810
Like an opening night without critics.
1552
02:09:10,982 --> 02:09:15,942
I'd like you to meet
my dearest friend, Vera Charles.
1553
02:09:16,121 --> 02:09:19,557
And the well-known publisher,
Mr. Lindsay Woolsey.
1554
02:09:19,724 --> 02:09:23,182
I'm charmed to meet you,
all of you.
1555
02:09:23,361 --> 02:09:26,956
I've got to tell you,
I adored you in Mary of Scotland.
1556
02:09:27,132 --> 02:09:31,193
Did you, dear? That was Helen Hayes.
1557
02:09:31,736 --> 02:09:33,636
Spirits!
1558
02:09:33,805 --> 02:09:37,036
Vera, can I persuade you
to have a drink?
1559
02:09:37,209 --> 02:09:40,337
Yes, dear. Anything but rum.
1560
02:09:40,512 --> 02:09:43,345
I've just been
to the most awful party...
1561
02:09:43,515 --> 02:09:47,508
...where they served nothing
but daiquiris made with honey.
1562
02:09:49,588 --> 02:09:52,580
- Mame!
- Acacius, darling.
1563
02:09:54,926 --> 02:09:57,019
Oh, Lord!
1564
02:09:57,329 --> 02:09:59,695
Mr. and Mrs. Upson, Mr. Babcock...
1565
02:09:59,864 --> 02:10:04,733
...l'd like you to meet Acacius Page,
Patrick's first teacher in New York.
1566
02:10:04,903 --> 02:10:09,363
The man who had a great deal
to do with molding his character.
1567
02:10:09,541 --> 02:10:12,169
Haven't we met before?
1568
02:10:12,344 --> 02:10:15,507
I don't recognize the face.
1569
02:10:22,187 --> 02:10:24,621
Acacius, darling, your lotus juice.
1570
02:10:24,789 --> 02:10:26,916
- Auntie Mame.
- Yes, dear.
1571
02:10:27,092 --> 02:10:31,529
- I thought this was a family night.
- This is our family.
1572
02:10:31,696 --> 02:10:35,564
Pegeen, are you having trouble?
Help her, please.
1573
02:10:35,967 --> 02:10:38,231
Thank you.
1574
02:10:42,040 --> 02:10:44,838
- Thanks, Lochinvar.
- Courtesy of the house.
1575
02:10:45,010 --> 02:10:49,037
- I'm fine. You have enough problems.
- Don't I, though?
1576
02:10:49,214 --> 02:10:52,047
That's a pretty picture, I must say.
1577
02:10:52,217 --> 02:10:56,813
Yes, isn't it? Ladies and gentlemen,
I want to propose a toast.
1578
02:10:57,022 --> 02:10:59,149
To this lovely young couple...
1579
02:10:59,324 --> 02:11:03,522
...as they start up
the ladder of life together.
1580
02:11:04,062 --> 02:11:08,590
Oh, no, Auntie Vera.
This isn't Gloria. That's Gloria.
1581
02:11:09,167 --> 02:11:10,998
Pity.
1582
02:11:14,105 --> 02:11:16,403
- I brought you something.
- What is it?
1583
02:11:16,574 --> 02:11:20,032
- Be careful. The ink's wet.
- My book!
1584
02:11:20,211 --> 02:11:22,873
I'm in print. Just like Edna Ferber.
1585
02:11:23,048 --> 02:11:25,710
You did it. I never knew
you went on with it.
1586
02:11:25,884 --> 02:11:29,217
Patrick, you have vision.
Mame, he's just like you.
1587
02:11:29,387 --> 02:11:33,346
- My lifesaver, Patrick, and Lindsay.
- This has been a great day.
1588
02:11:33,525 --> 02:11:37,052
Patrick, why didn't you tell me
your aunt was literate?
1589
02:11:37,495 --> 02:11:42,194
- Am I mentioned in your book?
- Mentioned? You're exposed!
1590
02:11:42,400 --> 02:11:46,564
A toast to Live, Live, Live
by Mame Dennis Burnside.
1591
02:11:46,971 --> 02:11:51,101
Step right up now,
and get your red hot chapters!
1592
02:11:51,276 --> 02:11:54,973
I've been to so many
wonderful parties here, Mame.
1593
02:11:55,146 --> 02:11:57,637
Now I'll see how they all ended.
1594
02:11:57,816 --> 02:12:03,220
I forgot about that time we almost got
caught in a speakeasy. I was 10.
1595
02:12:03,722 --> 02:12:07,351
Here's all about the roller skates
and Uncle Beau.
1596
02:12:07,525 --> 02:12:11,017
And that Christmas we were so broke.
1597
02:12:11,429 --> 02:12:15,092
Patrick, my little Patrick.
1598
02:12:15,633 --> 02:12:20,536
You can practically write a whole book
about what happened to me.
1599
02:12:21,005 --> 02:12:22,632
I beg your pardon?
1600
02:12:22,841 --> 02:12:26,834
I said, you can write a whole book
about what happened to me.
1601
02:12:27,011 --> 02:12:28,535
- Thank you.
- Yes.
1602
02:12:28,713 --> 02:12:33,309
Bunny Bixler and I were in the
semifinals, the very semifinals...
1603
02:12:33,485 --> 02:12:36,352
...of the Ping-Pong tournament
at the club.
1604
02:12:36,521 --> 02:12:39,183
And this ghastly thing happened.
1605
02:12:39,357 --> 02:12:45,728
We were both playing way over
our heads and the score was 29-28.
1606
02:12:45,897 --> 02:12:48,127
We had this terrific volley...
1607
02:12:48,299 --> 02:12:53,032
...and I stepped back
to get this really terrific shot.
1608
02:12:53,204 --> 02:12:59,040
And I stepped on the Ping-Pong ball.
1609
02:12:59,878 --> 02:13:03,006
I just squashed it to bits.
1610
02:13:03,181 --> 02:13:07,743
And then Bunny and I ran to the closet
to get another ball.
1611
02:13:07,919 --> 02:13:11,548
And the closet was locked. Imagine?
1612
02:13:11,723 --> 02:13:16,387
We had to call the whole thing off.
1613
02:13:17,328 --> 02:13:20,126
Well, it was ghastly.
1614
02:13:21,166 --> 02:13:24,727
Well, it was just ghastly.
1615
02:13:31,676 --> 02:13:35,669
- Well, it was amusing.
- Yes, yes.
1616
02:13:37,916 --> 02:13:40,714
It's hilarious!
1617
02:13:40,885 --> 02:13:43,854
- What is?
- Your story.
1618
02:13:47,158 --> 02:13:52,528
I'm so proud. The whole
last chapter's all about me.
1619
02:13:52,764 --> 02:13:56,063
"Fighting the stigma...
1620
02:13:56,234 --> 02:14:01,001
...of the unwed mother."
1621
02:14:05,910 --> 02:14:07,878
Mr. Upson, you lucky devil.
1622
02:14:08,046 --> 02:14:12,983
Your future son-in-law is featured in
one of the raciest books of the year.
1623
02:14:13,151 --> 02:14:17,952
Patrick, I had no idea how many times
you unzipped me and put me to bed.
1624
02:14:18,122 --> 02:14:21,057
Now, just a minute!
There are young people here.
1625
02:14:21,226 --> 02:14:25,925
I only did it when Miss Charles
had passed out.
1626
02:14:30,969 --> 02:14:32,129
Thank you, lto.
1627
02:14:32,303 --> 02:14:36,069
- Don't tell me she can't come.
- Who can't come?
1628
02:14:36,241 --> 02:14:40,371
That woman with the snakes from Paris.
She was to entertain us.
1629
02:14:40,545 --> 02:14:42,308
Vera, loan me your glasses.
1630
02:14:42,480 --> 02:14:45,313
"Read a forthcoming publication
of our book.
1631
02:14:45,483 --> 02:14:50,819
I'm entitled to half of the royalties
for services as editor and co-author..."
1632
02:14:50,989 --> 02:14:52,752
Brian!
1633
02:14:52,924 --> 02:14:54,289
Brian?
1634
02:14:54,893 --> 02:14:59,694
"Will return in a few days
to claim fruits of collaboration.
1635
02:15:00,565 --> 02:15:05,127
My claim will be substantiated
by my wife, Agnes Gooch O'Bannion."
1636
02:15:05,303 --> 02:15:06,497
Wife?
1637
02:15:06,671 --> 02:15:09,401
- Think, Agnes, think.
- Think?
1638
02:15:09,574 --> 02:15:11,269
Try!
1639
02:15:13,912 --> 02:15:17,473
Maybe that wasn't a movie we went to.
1640
02:15:17,649 --> 02:15:22,348
Maybe that wasn't Gary Cooper.
It was Brian.
1641
02:15:22,520 --> 02:15:25,045
And the girl was...
1642
02:15:26,457 --> 02:15:28,322
...me!
1643
02:15:28,493 --> 02:15:32,054
- I'm a bride!
- Oh, darling, congratulations.
1644
02:15:32,230 --> 02:15:34,528
Isn't it wonderful, Patrick?
1645
02:15:34,699 --> 02:15:38,191
- I'm so happy for you!
- Honey, isn't this terrific?
1646
02:15:38,369 --> 02:15:41,896
This is revolting.
How can you tolerate people who...?
1647
02:15:42,073 --> 02:15:44,405
Who aren't absolutely top drawer?
1648
02:15:44,576 --> 02:15:47,374
These are my friends.
People who brought me up.
1649
02:15:47,545 --> 02:15:51,948
Riffraff! When we're married,
don't invite such people to our house.
1650
02:15:52,116 --> 02:15:57,144
- Who'll be coming? Bunny, Muriel Puce?
- What's wrong with Muriel Puce?
1651
02:15:57,322 --> 02:16:01,816
She has the IQ of a dead battery.
As for your other girlfriends...
1652
02:16:01,993 --> 02:16:05,588
...they're a lot of vain,
selfish, empty bigots.
1653
02:16:08,766 --> 02:16:11,997
Marvelous! You'll make
a fortune out of this book.
1654
02:16:12,170 --> 02:16:14,229
She will, but not for herself.
1655
02:16:14,405 --> 02:16:17,806
She gave her royalties
to the Epstein Home in Montebank.
1656
02:16:17,976 --> 02:16:21,036
- Epstein the cellist?
- What about Montebank?
1657
02:16:21,212 --> 02:16:24,739
Can't the Epsteins afford
their own home?
1658
02:16:24,916 --> 02:16:27,350
They're not going to live there.
1659
02:16:27,518 --> 02:16:31,887
They're building a home there
for refugee Jewish children.
1660
02:16:32,457 --> 02:16:35,517
- What's that?!
- Oh, no!
1661
02:16:37,562 --> 02:16:39,553
Jackpot!
1662
02:16:43,167 --> 02:16:47,604
Pegeen, call Denmark quick
and get ahold of Yul Uhlu!
1663
02:16:53,945 --> 02:16:55,344
Are you all right, Doris?
1664
02:16:56,781 --> 02:16:57,873
You ready?
1665
02:16:58,049 --> 02:17:02,315
I've been ready for quite some time.
Come, Glory!
1666
02:17:02,487 --> 02:17:04,182
You...!
1667
02:17:05,923 --> 02:17:11,054
Claude! Claude! Don't be hasty.
1668
02:17:20,071 --> 02:17:25,099
For 9 years, Mame Dennis Burnside,
I have done everything in my power...
1669
02:17:25,276 --> 02:17:29,576
...to protect this boy from
your idiotic, cockeyed nincompoopery!
1670
02:17:29,747 --> 02:17:33,513
Now you've ruined everything.
All my plans for Patrick...!
1671
02:17:33,685 --> 02:17:39,817
Your plans!
You're shouting orders for everyone.
1672
02:17:39,991 --> 02:17:43,324
Did it occur to you
this boy might be hungry...
1673
02:17:43,494 --> 02:17:46,122
...for something
you've never heard of?
1674
02:17:46,698 --> 02:17:49,758
When Patrick first walked
into my life...
1675
02:17:49,934 --> 02:17:52,630
...a frightened little boy...
1676
02:17:52,804 --> 02:17:56,137
...hanging on to Norah's hand...
1677
02:17:57,442 --> 02:18:00,673
...it was love at first sight.
1678
02:18:01,212 --> 02:18:04,511
For 9 years I've tried
to open windows in his life.
1679
02:18:04,682 --> 02:18:07,515
You want to shut him up
in a safe deposit box.
1680
02:18:07,685 --> 02:18:10,381
I won't let you do that
to my little one.
1681
02:18:12,390 --> 02:18:14,187
Oh, no.
1682
02:18:16,027 --> 02:18:18,860
He's not little anymore.
1683
02:18:20,832 --> 02:18:24,598
And he's not mine.
But he's not yours, Mr. Babcock.
1684
02:18:24,769 --> 02:18:29,365
Patrick won't let you settle him down
in a restricted community...
1685
02:18:29,540 --> 02:18:31,770
...make him an Aryan from Darien...
1686
02:18:31,943 --> 02:18:35,743
...and marry him off to a girl
with braces on her brains.
1687
02:18:46,357 --> 02:18:50,851
Mame, did you deliberately
plan all this?
1688
02:18:52,063 --> 02:18:57,558
Don't be ridiculous. Patrick always
makes all his own decisions.
1689
02:18:57,735 --> 02:19:00,602
Rattlesnake, anyone?
1690
02:19:06,611 --> 02:19:08,841
Thank you...
1691
02:19:09,714 --> 02:19:12,512
...Lady Iris.
1692
02:19:13,718 --> 02:19:15,811
Charmed...
1693
02:19:17,021 --> 02:19:19,683
...Lord Dudley.
1694
02:19:27,298 --> 02:19:31,029
Punjab, India. June 28, 1946.
1695
02:19:31,202 --> 02:19:35,195
Mr. and Mrs. Patrick Dennis,
224 E. 50th Street, New York.
1696
02:19:35,373 --> 02:19:39,104
Dear Patrick and Pegeen:
Arriving from India, June 31.
1697
02:19:39,277 --> 02:19:41,404
Meet me Beekman Place apartment.
1698
02:19:41,579 --> 02:19:43,877
Must return India in two weeks...
1699
02:19:44,048 --> 02:19:48,508
... when Uncle Lindsay will have
finished his course in yoga.
1700
02:20:25,223 --> 02:20:29,990
- What were you doing in there?
- Just giving Michael his presents.
1701
02:20:30,161 --> 02:20:32,561
Look, Dad. Which is the front?
1702
02:20:32,730 --> 02:20:37,190
Oh, my little love, let me help you.
There, now.
1703
02:20:37,368 --> 02:20:41,327
Salaam for your mother
like Auntie Mame just taught you.
1704
02:20:42,373 --> 02:20:45,342
Very good, sahib.
1705
02:20:45,509 --> 02:20:49,912
- That's not a real sword, is it?
- It's a scimitar.
1706
02:20:51,949 --> 02:20:53,678
That's what I always say.
1707
02:20:54,218 --> 02:20:58,484
In Hindustani it means, "The
water oxen are waiting at the gate."
1708
02:20:58,656 --> 02:21:04,856
My water oxen's waiting at Idlewild,
Pan American flight 100 for Karachi.
1709
02:21:05,029 --> 02:21:08,897
Michael, if I could only
show you India.
1710
02:21:09,066 --> 02:21:11,728
The color, the splendor, the mystery.
1711
02:21:11,903 --> 02:21:16,533
- The elephants in the street...
- Now, Auntie Mame.
1712
02:21:18,309 --> 02:21:20,038
I know, I know.
1713
02:21:20,211 --> 02:21:25,342
I shouldn't mention the possibility
of Michael going to India with me.
1714
02:21:25,516 --> 02:21:29,111
Auntie Mame said she'd love
to have me. She said so in there.
1715
02:21:29,287 --> 02:21:33,121
- That's ridiculous. I won't hear of it.
- Dad?
1716
02:21:33,291 --> 02:21:36,852
It's out of the question.
You heard your mother.
1717
02:21:41,032 --> 02:21:44,866
You know what your trouble is?
You don't live, live, live!
1718
02:21:45,036 --> 02:21:49,803
Life is a banquet and most poor
suckers are starving to death.
1719
02:22:04,689 --> 02:22:06,714
One thing you must remember:
1720
02:22:06,891 --> 02:22:11,123
School begins the day after Labor Day.
He must be back by then.
1721
02:22:11,295 --> 02:22:14,093
Naturally.
1722
02:22:14,799 --> 02:22:17,097
Of course.
1723
02:22:17,335 --> 02:22:22,796
Labor Day. That's sometime
in November, isn't it?
1724
02:22:22,974 --> 02:22:25,807
The first week in September,
Auntie Mame.
1725
02:22:25,977 --> 02:22:29,936
Labor. The problem of labor
in India is gargantuan.
1726
02:22:30,114 --> 02:22:32,275
What's "gargantuan," Auntie Mame?
1727
02:22:32,450 --> 02:22:35,283
On the plane, I'll give you
a pad and pencil...
1728
02:22:35,453 --> 02:22:38,616
...to write down all the words
you don't understand.
1729
02:22:38,789 --> 02:22:42,555
I've been out shopping all morning
for your traveling gear.
1730
02:22:42,760 --> 02:22:46,059
Let's go upstairs and try things on.
1731
02:22:46,230 --> 02:22:50,860
Oh, Michael, I'm going
to open doors for you.
1732
02:22:51,035 --> 02:22:54,368
Doors you never even dreamed existed.
1733
02:22:54,805 --> 02:22:57,740
I give up. She's the pied piper.
1734
02:22:57,908 --> 02:23:00,604
Oh, what times we're going to have!
1735
02:23:00,778 --> 02:23:04,145
What vistas we're going
to explore together.
1736
02:23:04,315 --> 02:23:07,409
We'll spend a day at
an ancient Hindu temple.
1737
02:23:07,585 --> 02:23:10,076
The head monk is Auntie Mame's friend.
1738
02:23:10,254 --> 02:23:14,520
Perhaps he'll let you ring the bells
that bring the monks to prayer.
1739
02:23:14,692 --> 02:23:19,254
There, on the highest tower on a
clear day, you can see the Taj Mahal.
1740
02:23:19,430 --> 02:23:21,364
Beyond that is a beautiful...
147343