All language subtitles for Connecting... - 01x06 - Day 135.BAE.English.HI.C.updated.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,844 --> 00:00:08,236 [discordant piano notes] 2 00:00:08,261 --> 00:00:10,115 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:10,140 --> 00:00:13,586 [light piano music] 4 00:00:13,611 --> 00:00:16,054 Okay, before she gets on, what do we think about Annie 5 00:00:16,079 --> 00:00:17,628 moving back to Orlando to live with her parents? 6 00:00:17,652 --> 00:00:19,484 I know. It's crazy, I don't like it. 7 00:00:19,509 --> 00:00:20,912 Superior orange juice. 8 00:00:20,937 --> 00:00:22,489 Wait, Annie's moving back home? 9 00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:24,336 Yeah, she told the Gossip Girls last night. 10 00:00:24,361 --> 00:00:25,617 Honorary member. 11 00:00:25,641 --> 00:00:27,949 - Also founding member. - And then Michelle told me 12 00:00:27,974 --> 00:00:29,958 right after Annie told you guys. 13 00:00:29,983 --> 00:00:32,969 - Couples confidentiality clause. - Rufus, how'd you know? 14 00:00:32,993 --> 00:00:35,848 How did I know? How d... how didn't I know. 15 00:00:35,872 --> 00:00:36,939 [scoffs] 16 00:00:36,963 --> 00:00:39,929 - Orlando? Like, Florida? - No, Orlando like Bloom, Ben. 17 00:00:39,953 --> 00:00:41,940 Gosh, first the NBA, now Annie. 18 00:00:41,966 --> 00:00:43,688 Oh, my God. Do I want to move to Florida? 19 00:00:43,713 --> 00:00:44,939 Why, so you can see 20 00:00:44,963 --> 00:00:46,740 your Clippers lose to the Lakers again? 21 00:00:46,765 --> 00:00:49,948 Dang, Garret, Kawhi you gotta be so rude? 22 00:00:49,972 --> 00:00:51,697 They're just acclimating to life in the bubble. 23 00:00:51,722 --> 00:00:53,820 They haven't seen their families for months. 24 00:00:53,853 --> 00:00:55,073 Oh, can I be a basketball person? 25 00:00:55,098 --> 00:00:56,121 But Annie can't go. 26 00:00:56,146 --> 00:00:57,977 I mean, she's our family. 27 00:00:58,002 --> 00:01:00,462 Well, technically, she's her family's family. 28 00:01:00,487 --> 00:01:01,939 Maybe she misses them. 29 00:01:01,963 --> 00:01:03,280 She's just going stir crazy. 30 00:01:03,312 --> 00:01:06,297 What Annie needs is some local, COVID-approved, 31 00:01:06,321 --> 00:01:07,794 quarantine bae 32 00:01:07,818 --> 00:01:11,217 - for some quarantine "Hey." - Ooh! 33 00:01:11,241 --> 00:01:13,562 You speak as if from experience. 34 00:01:13,761 --> 00:01:17,700 Well, I can neither confirm nor deny that I may or may not 35 00:01:17,725 --> 00:01:20,217 be getting some regularly scheduled maintenance. 36 00:01:20,241 --> 00:01:22,609 What? Good for you. 37 00:01:22,634 --> 00:01:24,691 Well, you know maybe Annie is one of those people 38 00:01:24,716 --> 00:01:26,519 That has trouble divorcing sex and feelings, 39 00:01:26,551 --> 00:01:27,637 Which I've heard is a thing. 40 00:01:27,995 --> 00:01:29,083 I'll tell you what Annie 41 00:01:29,114 --> 00:01:30,536 won't have trouble with... 42 00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:33,353 [Southern accent] Aah! All them gentlemen callers 43 00:01:33,378 --> 00:01:35,689 - in them central Florida suburbs. - [Southern Accent] Mm-hmm, 44 00:01:35,713 --> 00:01:37,687 just fields of former high school flames 45 00:01:37,713 --> 00:01:39,588 Turned husband material 46 00:01:39,612 --> 00:01:41,496 with real estate licenses 47 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:43,577 just awaiting Miss Annie's return. 48 00:01:43,601 --> 00:01:45,247 You do know that Florida 49 00:01:45,263 --> 00:01:47,193 isn't the Deep South, right? 50 00:01:47,217 --> 00:01:49,273 Well, where is it then? The Lower East? 51 00:01:50,047 --> 00:01:51,863 Hey, y'all. Sorry I'm late. 52 00:01:51,888 --> 00:01:54,038 I was talking to this guy who might sublet my apartment. 53 00:01:54,063 --> 00:01:56,040 - So this move is for real? - Yeah. 54 00:01:56,065 --> 00:01:58,042 You think my downstairs neighbors will mind 55 00:01:58,076 --> 00:02:00,042 He's an online Muay Thai instructor? 56 00:02:00,076 --> 00:02:01,992 Why, because of the noise, 57 00:02:02,016 --> 00:02:03,961 or because of a potentially asymptomatic virus carrier 58 00:02:03,985 --> 00:02:05,718 penetrating their bubble of safety? 59 00:02:05,743 --> 00:02:07,041 This whole thing is madness. 60 00:02:07,065 --> 00:02:08,528 No, you know what's madness? 61 00:02:08,553 --> 00:02:10,609 I haven't left my apartment in five months. 62 00:02:11,038 --> 00:02:12,723 My parents' house has a pool, 63 00:02:12,748 --> 00:02:14,933 my mom makes the best ropa vieja, 64 00:02:14,966 --> 00:02:16,972 and the humidity sucks, but it's great for my skin. 65 00:02:16,996 --> 00:02:19,973 [laughs] Yeah, 'cause your skin is hideous here. 66 00:02:20,005 --> 00:02:22,054 I'm paying a ton of money in LA rent and for what? 67 00:02:22,078 --> 00:02:24,012 I can't see the city or my friends, 68 00:02:24,038 --> 00:02:26,062 And it's not like I have a boyfriend 69 00:02:26,086 --> 00:02:29,022 - to you know, you know... - Have sex with? 70 00:02:29,046 --> 00:02:30,051 Use to drive in the HOV lane? 71 00:02:30,075 --> 00:02:31,208 Oh, tap dance with at 72 00:02:31,233 --> 00:02:32,708 the Griffith Park Observatory? 73 00:02:33,075 --> 00:02:34,552 We'll still be able to chat 74 00:02:34,576 --> 00:02:36,051 on video like we do now. 75 00:02:36,075 --> 00:02:37,487 Question: does your mom 76 00:02:37,511 --> 00:02:38,655 make the ropa vieja 77 00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,857 - with her own sofrito? - Absolutely. 78 00:02:40,882 --> 00:02:42,051 Follow-up question: 79 00:02:42,075 --> 00:02:43,599 can I move in with your parents too? 80 00:02:43,624 --> 00:02:45,428 No. No one is moving. 81 00:02:45,453 --> 00:02:48,063 Life, relationships, friendships are tenuous. 82 00:02:48,089 --> 00:02:49,764 We must stay close. We must. 83 00:02:50,089 --> 00:02:52,984 - Was that a haiku? - I think so. We'll be right back. 84 00:02:53,009 --> 00:02:57,762 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 85 00:02:57,795 --> 00:02:59,071 Uh, where did everyone go? 86 00:02:59,095 --> 00:03:00,982 This is my Scheme Team breakout room. 87 00:03:01,015 --> 00:03:02,823 Ugh, no. No, Rufus, no more schemes. 88 00:03:02,848 --> 00:03:04,331 I almost lost a kidney last time. 89 00:03:04,356 --> 00:03:05,911 Every Thelma needs a Louise. 90 00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:07,930 Do you know how that movie ends? No. 91 00:03:08,109 --> 00:03:09,747 Why do you always pick me for these things? 92 00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:11,002 Because you're easily swayed, 93 00:03:11,026 --> 00:03:13,051 and this is a scheme to keep Annie in Los Angeles. 94 00:03:13,738 --> 00:03:15,222 All right, I guess I'll hear you out. 95 00:03:15,247 --> 00:03:16,615 One person moves away, 96 00:03:16,640 --> 00:03:18,616 and the entire friend group chemistry is disrupted 97 00:03:18,641 --> 00:03:20,202 Like an atom losing an electron. 98 00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:23,164 Next thing you know, it's just you, your tears, 99 00:03:23,189 --> 00:03:25,709 and the artisanal IPA you brew in your bathtub. 100 00:03:25,860 --> 00:03:27,447 I didn't know we meant that much to you, 101 00:03:27,472 --> 00:03:29,603 Or that that was how you were making that beer! 102 00:03:29,628 --> 00:03:31,706 When we were working retail together, 103 00:03:31,857 --> 00:03:34,002 and you, Annie, and Ellis accidentally invited me 104 00:03:34,026 --> 00:03:35,687 to dinner at Michelle and Garret's, 105 00:03:35,712 --> 00:03:38,032 It gave me that warm, fuzzy feeling you get 106 00:03:38,056 --> 00:03:39,962 when you see Colin Firth in a romantic comedy. 107 00:03:39,986 --> 00:03:42,033 I do not get the appeal of that dude. 108 00:03:42,058 --> 00:03:44,406 If Annie leaves, I know where this goes: 109 00:03:44,621 --> 00:03:46,062 back to loneliness. 110 00:03:46,086 --> 00:03:48,613 Where I thrive, but still. 111 00:03:48,966 --> 00:03:50,008 All right. 112 00:03:50,032 --> 00:03:52,070 - What's the plan? - Simple. 113 00:03:52,118 --> 00:03:54,032 We keep the electron from gravitating 114 00:03:54,056 --> 00:03:55,488 towards a higher affinity atom. 115 00:03:56,234 --> 00:03:58,002 We stop Annie from leaving, 116 00:03:58,026 --> 00:04:00,431 - starting with a little blackmail. - Wait, we're blackmailing her? 117 00:04:00,456 --> 00:04:02,508 - I'll explain everything in the group. - Why can't you tell me right here? 118 00:04:02,533 --> 00:04:04,387 Where did you guys go? 119 00:04:04,412 --> 00:04:05,782 - Hand sanitizer. - Uh, yeah... 120 00:04:05,807 --> 00:04:07,873 We're launching a whole new product line. 121 00:04:07,899 --> 00:04:08,951 Guys, it's August. 122 00:04:08,975 --> 00:04:11,022 No one cares about hand sanitizer anymore. 123 00:04:11,056 --> 00:04:12,620 We've all just given up. 124 00:04:12,645 --> 00:04:13,692 [clears throat] 125 00:04:13,717 --> 00:04:15,032 Annie Diaz, 126 00:04:15,056 --> 00:04:16,529 would you describe your relationship with your mother, 127 00:04:16,554 --> 00:04:18,082 Marta Alejandra Diaz, 128 00:04:18,106 --> 00:04:20,083 as being congruent, politically speaking? 129 00:04:20,109 --> 00:04:23,306 - Why do you know my mom's full name? - Great question. 130 00:04:23,331 --> 00:04:25,072 May I present to you my deposition. 131 00:04:25,096 --> 00:04:27,013 Exhibit A: a post from Annie's 132 00:04:27,037 --> 00:04:28,535 social media reading, 133 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,123 "Defund the Police." 134 00:04:30,148 --> 00:04:32,050 Yeah, that's not how depositions work... 135 00:04:32,075 --> 00:04:34,573 Exactly. Exhibit B. 136 00:04:34,598 --> 00:04:36,082 An email from Marta 137 00:04:36,106 --> 00:04:38,409 reading, "Refund the Police." 138 00:04:39,452 --> 00:04:41,071 What? My mom said that? 139 00:04:41,096 --> 00:04:44,811 A house in suburban Florida divided. The defense rests. 140 00:04:44,836 --> 00:04:46,712 That's still not a deposition, bro. 141 00:04:46,737 --> 00:04:49,073 You know, my dad sends me daily email forwards 142 00:04:49,106 --> 00:04:50,583 About how Bill Gates is trying 143 00:04:50,607 --> 00:04:52,106 to kill us with a vaccine. 144 00:04:52,131 --> 00:04:53,761 What Bill Gates ever do to anyone? 145 00:04:53,786 --> 00:04:55,512 Windows 95, Clippy, 146 00:04:55,537 --> 00:04:56,972 Minesweeper... 147 00:04:56,996 --> 00:04:59,011 Wait, why is my mom sending you emails? 148 00:04:59,035 --> 00:05:00,041 Parents love me. 149 00:05:00,065 --> 00:05:03,012 I've been told it's my childlike sense of wonder. 150 00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:05,061 Annie, if you're gonna have drama with your parents, 151 00:05:05,085 --> 00:05:07,537 You know, I mean, maybe you shouldn't move back home. 152 00:05:07,562 --> 00:05:10,508 Oh, it's fine. I just need to school my mom on the state of our country. 153 00:05:10,549 --> 00:05:12,045 Thankfully, I do my homework. 154 00:05:12,085 --> 00:05:14,852 Your social media activism has been on point. 155 00:05:14,877 --> 00:05:17,477 You didn't even fall for the black square. 156 00:05:17,853 --> 00:05:18,945 I don't know, Annie. 157 00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:21,020 The brain loses elasticity as we age 158 00:05:21,045 --> 00:05:22,378 Making it very hard to change. 159 00:05:22,403 --> 00:05:23,875 Our parents minds 160 00:05:23,900 --> 00:05:25,370 are like a pair of suede pants. 161 00:05:25,395 --> 00:05:27,332 Hey, that's not always true. 162 00:05:27,472 --> 00:05:29,309 My mom and I had a huge falling out 163 00:05:29,334 --> 00:05:31,688 when I decided to have my gender confirmation surgery, 164 00:05:31,713 --> 00:05:33,706 and it took a lot of time, 165 00:05:34,056 --> 00:05:35,528 and energy, but now Janice 166 00:05:35,552 --> 00:05:37,032 and I are stronger than ever. 167 00:05:37,056 --> 00:05:39,639 We owe it to our parents to give them the chance 168 00:05:39,664 --> 00:05:41,041 - to grow as people. - Exactly. 169 00:05:41,224 --> 00:05:42,678 My mom's a good person. 170 00:05:42,976 --> 00:05:45,051 She just doesn't have all the right info. 171 00:05:45,075 --> 00:05:47,945 Luckily, I've got killer rhetoric-al skills. 172 00:05:49,006 --> 00:05:51,939 - You mean "rhetorical"? - No, not like a rhetorical question. 173 00:05:51,964 --> 00:05:53,886 Rhetoric-al, as in rhetoric 174 00:05:53,911 --> 00:05:55,854 but the adjective of it. 175 00:05:57,257 --> 00:06:00,277 Yeah, this is maybe not gonna go as smooth as you think. 176 00:06:00,302 --> 00:06:02,210 ♪ ♪ 177 00:06:06,744 --> 00:06:08,473 [light piano music] 178 00:06:08,498 --> 00:06:09,585 - Annie. - Annabelle! 179 00:06:09,822 --> 00:06:12,521 - Dimelo. - Why are you in different rooms? 180 00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:15,463 Because your mom doesn't understand the perfect AC temperature 181 00:06:15,487 --> 00:06:16,752 is 67 degrees. 182 00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:19,349 For the walk-in refrigerator at Costco. 183 00:06:19,374 --> 00:06:21,382 - Okay, Mo... - Oh, and speaking of Costco... 184 00:06:21,407 --> 00:06:23,051 She emptied out the store for you. 185 00:06:23,076 --> 00:06:24,914 What about you, Señor Samples? 186 00:06:24,939 --> 00:06:27,478 - They're free. - Ay, Annie, I got you 187 00:06:27,502 --> 00:06:30,333 those carbonated waters that you like that smell like ChapStick. 188 00:06:30,358 --> 00:06:32,415 Also this hair towel 189 00:06:32,711 --> 00:06:35,071 because you never dry your hair after the shower, 190 00:06:35,096 --> 00:06:36,553 and it's bad for your sinuses. 191 00:06:36,577 --> 00:06:39,773 - Mom, I'm not a kid anymore! - You are my youngest. 192 00:06:39,798 --> 00:06:41,651 You will always be my baby. 193 00:06:41,676 --> 00:06:43,632 Actually, I wanted to talk to you about... 194 00:06:43,657 --> 00:06:46,034 Ooh, I almost forgot the travel suit! 195 00:06:46,059 --> 00:06:47,072 I saw it on QVC. 196 00:06:47,096 --> 00:06:48,966 Let me send it to you. 197 00:06:49,927 --> 00:06:51,562 Mom, that looks insane. 198 00:06:51,587 --> 00:06:52,582 It's already on the way. 199 00:06:52,607 --> 00:06:54,359 No, you have to talk to me about these things! 200 00:06:54,384 --> 00:06:55,526 You can't just assume that I'm gonna... 201 00:06:55,551 --> 00:06:57,094 Ooh, you're gonna be here in time 202 00:06:57,119 --> 00:06:58,911 For Mileidys's baby shower! Oy. 203 00:06:58,936 --> 00:07:00,450 You know, she had a very hard time 204 00:07:00,475 --> 00:07:01,968 Getting pregnant, pobresita. 205 00:07:01,993 --> 00:07:03,493 She tried everything. 206 00:07:03,518 --> 00:07:04,872 She even wore the evil eye 207 00:07:04,897 --> 00:07:06,776 on her wrists and her ankles. 208 00:07:07,065 --> 00:07:08,898 Nothing. They had to mortgage the house 209 00:07:08,923 --> 00:07:10,990 In order to pay for the fertility treatment. 210 00:07:11,015 --> 00:07:13,470 Dios mío, qué cosa! 211 00:07:13,495 --> 00:07:14,525 ♪ ♪ 212 00:07:14,550 --> 00:07:15,967 That "Refund the Police" 213 00:07:15,992 --> 00:07:17,407 email was clutch! 214 00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:19,153 Both: Scheme Team! 215 00:07:19,263 --> 00:07:21,044 All right, now for phase two. 216 00:07:21,068 --> 00:07:23,083 I'm hacking into Annie's newsfeeds 217 00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:24,521 and flooding them with targeted ads 218 00:07:24,546 --> 00:07:26,521 To remind her of how much Florida sucks. 219 00:07:26,546 --> 00:07:27,551 Check it out. 220 00:07:27,576 --> 00:07:29,284 Alligator insurance, 221 00:07:29,309 --> 00:07:30,935 local congressmen, 222 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:34,102 - and this gross dating website I found. - Wow. 223 00:07:35,482 --> 00:07:37,377 Hey, are we doing the right thing? 224 00:07:37,402 --> 00:07:39,022 Last thing I wanna do is hurt Annie. 225 00:07:39,609 --> 00:07:42,476 Ben, a Scheme Team requires full transparency. 226 00:07:42,501 --> 00:07:44,588 Is there something else going on between you two? 227 00:07:44,731 --> 00:07:46,687 With me and Annie? No, no, we're just friends. 228 00:07:46,965 --> 00:07:49,822 I mean, there was this one intense moment in Chicago 229 00:07:49,847 --> 00:07:51,551 where I thought there may have been a vibe, 230 00:07:51,576 --> 00:07:53,332 But... she told me a story 231 00:07:53,357 --> 00:07:54,710 about how she could never date a friend, 232 00:07:54,735 --> 00:07:56,932 which definitely killed the vibe. 233 00:07:56,966 --> 00:07:58,972 Mmm, vibes are a fragile wavelength. 234 00:07:58,996 --> 00:08:01,853 Like friend groups, they need to be lovingly maintained. 235 00:08:01,885 --> 00:08:03,735 Now, can we please manipulate our good pal 236 00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:06,377 - into staying in LA with us? - Let's do it. 237 00:08:06,402 --> 00:08:08,448 ♪ ♪ 238 00:08:08,996 --> 00:08:11,741 Pero how do you know the police have too much money? 239 00:08:11,766 --> 00:08:13,740 I think the police don't have enough money. 240 00:08:13,814 --> 00:08:16,286 Mom, they're like the Kardashian-Jenners. 241 00:08:16,311 --> 00:08:18,752 They have so much they're being irresponsible with it. 242 00:08:18,777 --> 00:08:20,226 Stormi did not need her own 243 00:08:20,251 --> 00:08:21,710 theme park for her birthday. 244 00:08:21,735 --> 00:08:23,721 - That was too much for Stormi. - No. That is true. 245 00:08:23,746 --> 00:08:26,505 50% of most city budgets go to the police. 246 00:08:26,530 --> 00:08:27,715 That's way too much. 247 00:08:27,740 --> 00:08:29,716 How do you know it's too much? 248 00:08:29,741 --> 00:08:31,688 Are you city planner, hmm? 249 00:08:31,713 --> 00:08:32,852 You could've been a city planner. 250 00:08:32,877 --> 00:08:34,731 You used to do that afterschool program. 251 00:08:34,756 --> 00:08:35,759 What was it called? 252 00:08:35,784 --> 00:08:37,731 - Youth in Congress. - Yes. 253 00:08:37,756 --> 00:08:40,393 You learned so much from that. 254 00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:43,093 Too bad you ruined your life by becoming a writer. 255 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,871 Mom, it's okay for people in my generation 256 00:08:45,896 --> 00:08:47,869 to pursue their passions. 257 00:08:48,005 --> 00:08:50,385 Passions do not pay the bills, mija. 258 00:08:50,410 --> 00:08:52,685 I'm in construction, and I have a passion for it. 259 00:08:52,710 --> 00:08:55,606 - Ramón, please! - Agh. 260 00:08:55,631 --> 00:08:58,053 Look, this issue is bigger than police funding. 261 00:08:58,086 --> 00:08:59,733 It's a systemic racial issue. 262 00:08:59,758 --> 00:09:02,184 Did you know 35% of African American men 263 00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:05,129 are incarcerated while only 50% aren't? 264 00:09:05,341 --> 00:09:06,835 What about the other 15%? 265 00:09:07,986 --> 00:09:10,401 - What? - 35 plus 50 is 85. 266 00:09:10,426 --> 00:09:11,906 No, Ramón? 267 00:09:11,938 --> 00:09:14,638 Oh, I can talk now? 268 00:09:14,832 --> 00:09:17,223 Entonces? Where's the other 15%? 269 00:09:17,303 --> 00:09:18,670 Um... 270 00:09:19,985 --> 00:09:22,000 Well, I know it's a real thing. 271 00:09:22,025 --> 00:09:24,735 I shared an article on, um... 272 00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:26,845 Hold on, let me just... Mmm... 273 00:09:27,620 --> 00:09:29,617 Maybe they didn't fill out the survey 274 00:09:29,642 --> 00:09:33,072 About... if they were incarcerated maybe? 275 00:09:33,096 --> 00:09:35,859 That's the thing about surveys. Not everyone fills them out 276 00:09:35,884 --> 00:09:37,328 sometimes, so... 277 00:09:37,353 --> 00:09:38,825 Mija, you can't trust 278 00:09:38,850 --> 00:09:40,330 everything you read 279 00:09:40,355 --> 00:09:42,140 on the internet. 280 00:09:42,251 --> 00:09:43,925 Do you get Fox News in LA? 281 00:09:48,406 --> 00:09:51,283 [downbeat piano music] 282 00:09:51,521 --> 00:09:53,082 It was so embarrassing! 283 00:09:53,106 --> 00:09:57,052 My mom ran circles around me in a political argument! My mom. 284 00:09:57,076 --> 00:10:00,073 Up until about a month ago, she though RBG was a clothing designer. 285 00:10:00,290 --> 00:10:02,361 So does this mean you're not moving home? 286 00:10:02,386 --> 00:10:04,072 Well, I wasn't going to, 287 00:10:04,096 --> 00:10:06,881 but then I started seeing all these ads for Florida, 288 00:10:06,905 --> 00:10:08,769 - and it made me nostalgic. - Both: Nostalgic? 289 00:10:08,794 --> 00:10:11,063 Yeah, I forgot how cute alligators are. 290 00:10:11,088 --> 00:10:13,557 You hear that, Rufus? She's feeling nostalgic! 291 00:10:13,582 --> 00:10:16,255 Also my ex-boyfriend from high school who used to be in a one-man 292 00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:17,596 Kid Rock cover band... 293 00:10:17,621 --> 00:10:20,085 So a Kid Rock impersonator, because that's what that is. 294 00:10:20,110 --> 00:10:23,597 He got his real estate license, and he's super rich now. 295 00:10:23,622 --> 00:10:25,464 He has the huge house next to Joey Fatone. 296 00:10:25,489 --> 00:10:28,326 We're just friends, but he said if things with my parents get weird, 297 00:10:28,351 --> 00:10:30,726 I can stay with him. Although I prefer not to 298 00:10:30,751 --> 00:10:32,914 because he's always tries to make me sing the Sheryl Crow part 299 00:10:32,938 --> 00:10:34,153 - of the song "Picture." - [cell phone dings] 300 00:10:34,178 --> 00:10:36,890 [Southern accent] Well, if it isn't Mr. Husband Material 301 00:10:36,915 --> 00:10:38,838 Here to sweep you away to his most certainly 302 00:10:38,862 --> 00:10:40,207 - tacky McMansion. - [cell phones dinging] 303 00:10:40,232 --> 00:10:42,350 [Southern accent] Oh, Mr. Former Kid Rock, 304 00:10:42,375 --> 00:10:45,711 - I do accept this rock on my finger. - Okay, guys. 305 00:10:45,736 --> 00:10:48,246 Florida is not the South. 306 00:10:48,278 --> 00:10:50,483 Oh, well, look at its location on a map. 307 00:10:50,508 --> 00:10:52,817 Ben, Rufus, what's with the phone pinging? 308 00:10:52,929 --> 00:10:54,947 You guys still talking about hand sanitizer? 309 00:10:54,972 --> 00:10:56,898 - 100%, yes. - 100%, big time, big time. 310 00:10:56,923 --> 00:10:57,930 Yeah, what is going on with you two? 311 00:10:57,955 --> 00:10:59,891 Yeah, I know Ben is easily swayed, 312 00:10:59,916 --> 00:11:02,428 but this level of interest in a Rufus-driven business 313 00:11:02,452 --> 00:11:03,861 is entirely suspect. 314 00:11:03,885 --> 00:11:05,244 - I am not easily swayed! - [cell phone dings] 315 00:11:05,269 --> 00:11:07,455 - Oh, come on. - Oh, you totally are. 316 00:11:07,480 --> 00:11:10,030 - Okay, fine. - Guys, can we focus? 317 00:11:10,055 --> 00:11:12,295 I know defunding the police is the right thing to do, 318 00:11:12,320 --> 00:11:15,388 I just don't know how to get my parents to know that. 319 00:11:15,413 --> 00:11:17,794 They do not play fair. They use Jedi mind tricks. 320 00:11:17,819 --> 00:11:19,686 My mom won an argument with me once 321 00:11:19,711 --> 00:11:21,669 by staring at me without blinking. 322 00:11:21,694 --> 00:11:23,349 I'm still working on a rebuttal. 323 00:11:23,374 --> 00:11:26,381 Well, take it from a three-time Mountain State regional debate champ, 324 00:11:26,541 --> 00:11:29,250 You gotta get inside the competition's head. 325 00:11:29,417 --> 00:11:31,051 And what's inside your mom's head 326 00:11:31,076 --> 00:11:34,630 is a deep and unquestioning love of the cops 327 00:11:34,655 --> 00:11:36,062 because that's exactly what 328 00:11:36,086 --> 00:11:37,876 American TV and film has put there. 329 00:11:37,901 --> 00:11:40,982 I guess if people haven't had a negative experience personally, 330 00:11:41,008 --> 00:11:43,208 like, say, every black person in America, 331 00:11:43,233 --> 00:11:44,902 It's hard for them to see the cops 332 00:11:44,926 --> 00:11:47,203 - as anything but the good guys. - Yeah, meanwhile, 333 00:11:47,228 --> 00:11:50,261 I was in my twenties when I realized that the "bad boys" 334 00:11:50,286 --> 00:11:53,477 in the theme song from "Cops" weren't the cops. 335 00:11:53,502 --> 00:11:55,358 They have too much money. 336 00:11:55,383 --> 00:11:58,333 In LA we give them $2 billion a year. 337 00:11:58,358 --> 00:12:00,861 If only we could spend a little bit of that on public education, 338 00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:02,914 then Richie and I wouldn't have to take out a loan 339 00:12:02,939 --> 00:12:04,496 to pay 28 grand to pay 340 00:12:04,521 --> 00:12:06,493 for virtual private school, 341 00:12:07,055 --> 00:12:09,436 which is just Big Bird on an iPad! 342 00:12:09,461 --> 00:12:10,911 Wait, 28... 343 00:12:10,935 --> 00:12:12,493 You are sending me the 20 bucks 344 00:12:12,517 --> 00:12:14,082 you owe me from poker now. 345 00:12:14,106 --> 00:12:15,740 I said we needed a loan! 346 00:12:15,765 --> 00:12:17,912 Yeah, people don't realize that "defund the police" 347 00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:21,797 - just means fund other departments. - Like social workers, you know, 348 00:12:21,822 --> 00:12:23,830 so a man with a gun and 16 weeks of training 349 00:12:23,862 --> 00:12:26,280 - doesn't answer mental health calls. - I wish I could just 350 00:12:26,305 --> 00:12:27,749 bring you guys with me 351 00:12:27,774 --> 00:12:29,454 to talk to my parents. 352 00:12:29,479 --> 00:12:30,931 You can't bring us, 353 00:12:30,956 --> 00:12:32,899 but we can help you prepare. 354 00:12:32,924 --> 00:12:33,626 Ooh. 355 00:12:33,651 --> 00:12:35,460 - Ooh, a project, a project! - Debate team! 356 00:12:35,485 --> 00:12:37,135 I love a good mise-en-place! 357 00:12:37,160 --> 00:12:39,096 Also you can bring Ben. 358 00:12:39,121 --> 00:12:41,358 - You can? - Oh, okay. 359 00:12:41,383 --> 00:12:42,858 Thanks, Ben. 360 00:12:43,468 --> 00:12:45,847 Rufus, these schemes aren't working, bruh. 361 00:12:45,872 --> 00:12:47,352 Look, if Annie wants to move home, 362 00:12:47,377 --> 00:12:50,282 - I think we just gotta let her go. - You can't! She likes you. 363 00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:52,709 What? 364 00:12:53,550 --> 00:12:55,859 Annie likes you, and I think you like her too. 365 00:12:55,884 --> 00:12:57,865 I think that's why you agreed to this scheme In the first place. 366 00:12:57,890 --> 00:13:00,051 You've been Colin Firth the whole time. 367 00:13:00,442 --> 00:13:03,352 No, no, no, she told me in Chicago she could never date a friend. 368 00:13:03,377 --> 00:13:05,293 You know what's great about this country? 369 00:13:05,318 --> 00:13:07,295 People are allowed to change their minds. 370 00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:09,299 They're even allowed to admit that they were wrong. 371 00:13:09,447 --> 00:13:10,570 Wait... 372 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:12,879 Is that why you wanted me on your Scheme Team? 373 00:13:13,038 --> 00:13:15,052 Am I your emergency backup plan? 374 00:13:15,076 --> 00:13:16,476 - How do you mean? - How do I know you're not 375 00:13:16,501 --> 00:13:19,052 lying to get me to help you save your friend group molecule. 376 00:13:19,077 --> 00:13:21,061 What? I never lie! 377 00:13:21,086 --> 00:13:23,012 You're lying to Annie right now! 378 00:13:23,038 --> 00:13:25,932 Okay, Annie I am lying to. 379 00:13:25,956 --> 00:13:28,228 Yes, but do you really wanna 380 00:13:28,253 --> 00:13:29,429 lose her to a fake Kid Rock 381 00:13:29,454 --> 00:13:31,531 that lives next door to a real Joey Fatone!? 382 00:13:33,956 --> 00:13:36,829 Okay, what? Now I gotta help her get along with her parents? 383 00:13:36,854 --> 00:13:38,369 That's what she'll think, 384 00:13:38,394 --> 00:13:40,081 but actually you'll be feeding her 385 00:13:40,106 --> 00:13:42,461 the exact wrong things to say. 386 00:13:42,486 --> 00:13:44,412 It's Scheme Team phase three, 387 00:13:44,437 --> 00:13:46,993 - a Reverse-Cyrano. - A reverse-what? 388 00:13:47,017 --> 00:13:48,052 Scheme Team! 389 00:13:48,076 --> 00:13:49,894 ♪ I just paid the check on a brand new car ♪ 390 00:13:49,918 --> 00:13:51,901 ♪ You wanna get to know me? I'm a brand new star ♪ 391 00:13:51,925 --> 00:13:53,902 ♪ I came to impress, that's the way I are ♪ 392 00:13:53,935 --> 00:13:56,022 ♪ Say it with my chest until this day comes ♪ 393 00:13:56,048 --> 00:13:58,024 ♪ I just might invest, think I'll start with the watches ♪ 394 00:13:58,048 --> 00:14:00,022 ♪ Who do you protect, N-A-P with the frost ♪ 395 00:14:00,055 --> 00:14:02,043 ♪ Not doing any less than my best, so start ♪ 396 00:14:02,076 --> 00:14:03,488 ♪ Get upset, take a rest, 397 00:14:03,512 --> 00:14:04,891 you watch ♪ 398 00:14:04,916 --> 00:14:06,902 ♪ Young way, strong way ♪ 399 00:14:06,966 --> 00:14:08,942 ♪ Get you in the morning ♪ 400 00:14:08,966 --> 00:14:11,052 ♪ Broadway, Broadway ♪ 401 00:14:11,076 --> 00:14:13,052 ♪ Put up an act on Broadway ♪ 402 00:14:13,076 --> 00:14:15,043 ♪ Do a little dance, sing a little jam ♪ 403 00:14:15,076 --> 00:14:17,043 ♪ Pick up the Benz and brace yourself ♪ 404 00:14:17,076 --> 00:14:18,478 ♪ Do a little dance, 405 00:14:18,502 --> 00:14:19,646 sing a little jam ♪ 406 00:14:19,671 --> 00:14:21,051 ♪ Pick up the Benz and brace yourself ♪ 407 00:14:21,076 --> 00:14:23,901 ♪ I know you feel it ♪ 408 00:14:23,925 --> 00:14:26,292 ♪ The animation ♪ 409 00:14:26,317 --> 00:14:29,160 ♪ I know you can't animate ♪ 410 00:14:29,185 --> 00:14:30,162 ♪ ♪ 411 00:14:30,187 --> 00:14:31,942 ♪ In front of millions ♪ 412 00:14:31,966 --> 00:14:34,031 ♪ Your motivation ♪ 413 00:14:34,055 --> 00:14:36,597 ♪ Just be yourself ♪ 414 00:14:36,622 --> 00:14:38,683 ♪ Animation ♪ 415 00:14:39,595 --> 00:14:41,042 Hey, you ready? 416 00:14:41,067 --> 00:14:44,618 Yeah, I think so. I got my talking points, my non-talking points, 417 00:14:44,643 --> 00:14:47,052 - My turtle neck, my cotton balls. - You got this. 418 00:14:47,076 --> 00:14:50,427 "You're gonna eat lightning and crap thunder." 419 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:52,705 It's from "Rocky." 420 00:14:53,015 --> 00:14:55,952 Just remember, I'll be hiding as a non-video participant. 421 00:14:55,976 --> 00:14:58,865 Your parents will not notice that, but I'll be with you the whole time. 422 00:14:59,193 --> 00:15:00,896 Why are you so great? 423 00:15:02,721 --> 00:15:04,608 That's what friends are for. 424 00:15:04,966 --> 00:15:08,032 Thanks, Ben. It means a lot having you in my corner. 425 00:15:08,058 --> 00:15:10,031 ♪ ♪ 426 00:15:10,055 --> 00:15:11,486 Okay. 427 00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:12,851 Here goes nothing. 428 00:15:13,102 --> 00:15:16,102 [keys clacking] 429 00:15:19,389 --> 00:15:21,674 [light piano music] 430 00:15:22,644 --> 00:15:24,324 - Hey. - Hi, mija. 431 00:15:24,349 --> 00:15:26,627 Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. Gimme one second. 432 00:15:26,883 --> 00:15:28,339 [keys clacking,] 433 00:15:28,364 --> 00:15:30,641 - [computer dings] - [computer beeps] 434 00:15:30,986 --> 00:15:34,082 Okay, I understand political conversations 435 00:15:34,106 --> 00:15:37,612 can be tricky, so I wanted to ease into it 436 00:15:37,637 --> 00:15:39,662 and talk about... 437 00:15:40,025 --> 00:15:41,619 "Personal finances"? 438 00:15:41,644 --> 00:15:42,965 Ay, now she's finally ready to hear my YouTube 439 00:15:42,989 --> 00:15:44,613 - on how to balance a checkbook? - You need some money, mija? 440 00:15:44,638 --> 00:15:46,216 Sorry, actually 441 00:15:46,241 --> 00:15:48,081 let's discuss... 442 00:15:48,106 --> 00:15:49,962 [keys clacking] 443 00:15:49,986 --> 00:15:51,923 - [computer dings] - All the TV remotes? 444 00:15:51,949 --> 00:15:53,650 We have asked your brother so many times for this one thing. 445 00:15:53,675 --> 00:15:55,872 There's a remote for the TV, a remote for the speakers, 446 00:15:55,897 --> 00:15:56,982 A remote for the cable box, 447 00:15:57,007 --> 00:15:58,433 a remote for the streaming box... 448 00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,234 It doesn't make sense! And he refuses! 449 00:16:00,259 --> 00:16:01,806 After everything I did. 450 00:16:01,831 --> 00:16:03,858 Marta, relax. 451 00:16:03,883 --> 00:16:05,918 Te va a dar algo! 452 00:16:06,106 --> 00:16:08,574 You know what? Let's forget the icebreakers. 453 00:16:09,005 --> 00:16:10,918 Mom, I wanted to talk about 454 00:16:10,942 --> 00:16:12,852 your refund the police email. 455 00:16:12,876 --> 00:16:14,975 Annabelle, please, you wanna give your mom a heart attack? 456 00:16:14,999 --> 00:16:16,766 We already know she's gonna be talking about those remotes 457 00:16:16,791 --> 00:16:19,353 - until next week! - Just hear me out. 458 00:16:19,378 --> 00:16:22,013 I realize I feel passionately about a lot of issues, 459 00:16:22,038 --> 00:16:23,495 But I also recognize 460 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:26,426 I take in a lot of my news from TikTok. 461 00:16:26,451 --> 00:16:30,062 All I know is, it seems as if the system is broken. 462 00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:33,011 Maybe if we had better healthcare, 463 00:16:33,035 --> 00:16:35,579 Mileidys wouldn't have to mortgage her house 464 00:16:35,604 --> 00:16:37,453 to pay for fertility treatments. 465 00:16:37,478 --> 00:16:39,614 I mean, what if I have fertility issues? 466 00:16:39,639 --> 00:16:41,991 Por Dios, no! My grandkids, no! 467 00:16:42,015 --> 00:16:44,883 Not that I'm planning to have kids anytime soon, 468 00:16:45,525 --> 00:16:48,981 but, my friend Pradeep is about to pay $28,000 469 00:16:49,005 --> 00:16:51,862 in private school because public schools are inadequate. 470 00:16:51,887 --> 00:16:53,823 Remember Youth in Congress, 471 00:16:53,848 --> 00:16:55,827 the program in high school you thought could change my life? 472 00:16:56,008 --> 00:16:57,583 It's lost its funding. 473 00:16:57,608 --> 00:16:58,656 - Oh, qué lástima. - No. 474 00:16:58,681 --> 00:17:00,334 The funding for so many things 475 00:17:00,359 --> 00:17:01,951 that could change people's lives 476 00:17:01,976 --> 00:17:03,908 is just disappearing or never 477 00:17:03,932 --> 00:17:05,453 been there in the first place. 478 00:17:05,478 --> 00:17:08,300 It just feels as if we're spending the wealth of this country 479 00:17:08,325 --> 00:17:11,626 in ways that don't benefit the people that live in it. 480 00:17:11,651 --> 00:17:13,031 Defunding the police is not 481 00:17:13,056 --> 00:17:14,941 about removing the police, 482 00:17:14,965 --> 00:17:16,637 the police will still be here. 483 00:17:16,662 --> 00:17:18,890 It won't make us any less safe. 484 00:17:18,915 --> 00:17:20,955 It'll just make us more whole. 485 00:17:22,345 --> 00:17:23,772 Mom? 486 00:17:24,569 --> 00:17:27,753 - You're frozen. - No, I'm thinking. 487 00:17:28,667 --> 00:17:31,513 - We get to keep the police? - Yes, we just take 488 00:17:31,537 --> 00:17:34,148 some of their money and spend it in better ways. 489 00:17:34,173 --> 00:17:37,834 All this defund talk is scary with all these protests. 490 00:17:38,108 --> 00:17:40,352 But maybe 491 00:17:40,849 --> 00:17:42,351 you're right... 492 00:17:42,635 --> 00:17:45,592 It does feel like things need to change. 493 00:17:46,048 --> 00:17:48,825 America is always trying to make itself better. 494 00:17:49,026 --> 00:17:50,998 That's why we came here, 495 00:17:51,434 --> 00:17:52,991 but it takes work. 496 00:17:53,016 --> 00:17:56,465 Annie, I'm proud you're out there trying. 497 00:17:56,490 --> 00:17:58,456 The younger generation, 498 00:17:58,481 --> 00:18:00,992 we make fun of you and your TikyTok, 499 00:18:01,016 --> 00:18:02,867 but we are inspired by you. 500 00:18:03,380 --> 00:18:05,166 You give us hope. 501 00:18:06,026 --> 00:18:07,629 Thanks, Dad. 502 00:18:08,317 --> 00:18:10,181 I can't wait for you to come home. 503 00:18:10,206 --> 00:18:12,133 Me too. I love you guys. 504 00:18:12,407 --> 00:18:13,972 We love you, baby. 505 00:18:13,997 --> 00:18:16,117 Send me a picture when you try on the hazmat suit. 506 00:18:16,142 --> 00:18:17,177 Hmm? 507 00:18:17,815 --> 00:18:20,791 [warm piano music] 508 00:18:20,816 --> 00:18:24,108 ♪ ♪ 509 00:18:25,079 --> 00:18:26,055 Where'd you go? 510 00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:28,004 I thought you were gonna help me pee lightning 511 00:18:28,029 --> 00:18:29,763 And pass hail stones or whatever. 512 00:18:29,788 --> 00:18:34,078 I know. I just felt like you didn't need me. 513 00:18:34,261 --> 00:18:35,844 You know, maybe you do better on your own. 514 00:18:35,869 --> 00:18:38,370 Ben, I'm always gonna need you. 515 00:18:38,395 --> 00:18:40,301 Who's gonna make fun of my horrible impressions? 516 00:18:40,326 --> 00:18:42,403 I mean, they are horrible. 517 00:18:42,499 --> 00:18:44,365 Impressions aren't even cool to begin with, 518 00:18:44,390 --> 00:18:47,065 So when you do them badly, it's just very confusing. 519 00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,362 Why are you smiling? [laughs] 520 00:18:52,039 --> 00:18:56,022 I don't know. I... watching you with your parents, it was just... 521 00:18:56,046 --> 00:18:58,369 It's like seeing you on a whole other level. 522 00:18:58,726 --> 00:19:01,639 [chuckles] Yeah, I have no memory of what I said. 523 00:19:01,998 --> 00:19:03,855 Well, it was pretty amazing. 524 00:19:05,026 --> 00:19:06,732 You really moving back home? 525 00:19:07,359 --> 00:19:08,759 I don't know. 526 00:19:09,115 --> 00:19:10,558 You think I should? 527 00:19:11,887 --> 00:19:14,894 - No. - No? 528 00:19:14,919 --> 00:19:17,896 No. I'd miss you. 529 00:19:17,921 --> 00:19:21,262 - You would? - Yes. I would. 530 00:19:21,627 --> 00:19:23,665 Look, you gotta make your own decision, 531 00:19:24,036 --> 00:19:26,236 and I know we're just talking through screens right now, 532 00:19:26,261 --> 00:19:28,567 but, the thought of you moving to another screen 533 00:19:28,592 --> 00:19:31,670 in a different time zone, 2,500 miles away, 534 00:19:31,890 --> 00:19:34,901 yeah, you can put me down for a no on that one. 535 00:19:35,965 --> 00:19:37,247 Okay. 536 00:19:37,632 --> 00:19:39,993 I'll take it under advisement. 537 00:19:40,369 --> 00:19:41,890 Hey, how did you know? 538 00:19:41,915 --> 00:19:44,252 Know... I don't know. Know what? 539 00:19:44,277 --> 00:19:46,415 That Orlando was 2,500 miles away? 540 00:19:47,179 --> 00:19:49,373 Aw, yeah, I just... I just guessed. 541 00:19:49,398 --> 00:19:53,266 - Why? Is it? - Yeah, 2,500 miles. 542 00:19:53,291 --> 00:19:55,076 I looked it up. 543 00:19:55,730 --> 00:19:59,022 - Good night, Ben. - Good night, Annie. 544 00:19:59,633 --> 00:20:03,623 ♪ ♪ 545 00:20:13,892 --> 00:20:18,892 - Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 41071

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