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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:00:43,643 --> 00:00:45,711
Yeah. Mmm-hmm.
3
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:50,549
- Mmm-hmm. Yeah, keep doing that.
Okay. Okay.
4
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:54,019
Oh, Larry! -Oh... Uh, I'm
sorry, help me out here.
5
00:00:54,021 --> 00:00:56,221
- Suzanne.
- Oh, Susan!
6
00:00:56,223 --> 00:00:58,991
No! Suzanne. -I'm sorry.
I meant to say Susan.
7
00:00:58,993 --> 00:01:01,026
No. Suzanne.
8
00:01:01,028 --> 00:01:02,795
Oh, Suzanne!
9
00:01:04,932 --> 00:01:07,266
- Oh.
10
00:01:07,268 --> 00:01:10,269
- Yeah.
- You are amazing.
11
00:01:10,271 --> 00:01:11,837
- Well...
12
00:01:11,839 --> 00:01:14,173
I could never have reached those
heights of passion without you.
13
00:01:14,175 --> 00:01:17,409
Actually, you did reach those
heights of passion without me.
14
00:01:18,611 --> 00:01:21,113
Oh, God, you are so damn hot.
15
00:01:21,115 --> 00:01:23,682
Yeah. Right there, Larry.
That's it.
16
00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:25,717
- Don't stop.
- Larry!
17
00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:27,753
What?
18
00:01:29,722 --> 00:01:31,757
What?
19
00:01:31,759 --> 00:01:36,028
- So, how about some breakfast?
- I couldn't possibly.
20
00:01:39,399 --> 00:01:42,634
- You see, Su...
- Zanne!
21
00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:43,969
You see, Zanne,
22
00:01:43,971 --> 00:01:46,572
I know you'd want me
to have breakfast,
23
00:01:46,574 --> 00:01:49,475
date for a while, get married,
start a family,
24
00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:51,443
plants roots in the community,
25
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:54,179
join the local church, synagogue
or a polygamous cult,
26
00:01:54,181 --> 00:01:56,181
but that's not my speed.
27
00:01:56,183 --> 00:02:00,552
If I stay on the ground too
long, the sky starts to beckon.
28
00:02:00,554 --> 00:02:02,754
Don't you ever get
tired of that lifestyle,
29
00:02:02,756 --> 00:02:04,557
flying from place to place
all the time?
30
00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:07,593
Every once in a while,
I wake up in a cold sweat,
31
00:02:07,595 --> 00:02:10,829
my entire being enveloped by
a crushing, empty loneliness
32
00:02:10,831 --> 00:02:13,799
that physically presses down on
me till I can barely breathe.
33
00:02:15,101 --> 00:02:17,469
But then I ignore it
and it usually passes.
34
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,638
That doesn't sound too healthy.
35
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:23,809
Well, mind-blowing sex
and free medical advice.
36
00:02:23,811 --> 00:02:26,879
- Zanne, what don't you give?
- I have a surprise for you.
37
00:02:31,851 --> 00:02:34,253
Is that what I think it is?
38
00:02:34,255 --> 00:02:36,355
Here's something
to remember me by.
39
00:02:36,956 --> 00:02:38,524
- Oh.
40
00:02:38,526 --> 00:02:42,027
You sure I can't get you anything?
A little breakfast to go?
41
00:02:42,029 --> 00:02:44,763
Okay, but just something
quick and easy.
42
00:04:36,075 --> 00:04:38,543
So...
43
00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:40,779
Mr. Gaye,
44
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:43,448
um, you're a flight attendant?
45
00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:44,883
- Bingo.
46
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:47,786
- And, uh, you want us to
publish your book? -Yahtzee.
47
00:04:51,090 --> 00:04:53,610
- Oh, but the book is not written yet?
- Twister.
48
00:04:55,428 --> 00:04:59,398
Uh, and it is the story
of your life?
49
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:04,436
The Unauthorized Autobiography.
50
00:05:04,438 --> 00:05:06,571
The Unauthorized Autobiography?
51
00:05:06,573 --> 00:05:08,440
Um,
52
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:12,277
- but an autobiography cannot
be unauthorized. -Or can it?
53
00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:16,381
By writing the book, you're implicitly
authorizing that it be written.
54
00:05:16,383 --> 00:05:18,016
Define "implicitly."
55
00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:21,453
Mr. Gaye, was there ever a time in
the past that maybe I'm unaware of
56
00:05:21,455 --> 00:05:24,923
where I wiped my bottom
with 20 minutes of your life?
57
00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:28,126
Define "aware" and "20."
58
00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:30,062
- Who arranged this meeting?
- -Uh...
59
00:05:30,064 --> 00:05:31,496
I... I did, sir.
60
00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:33,465
You're fired.
61
00:05:36,636 --> 00:05:39,304
Oh. And happy birthday.
62
00:05:39,306 --> 00:05:42,374
- Hey. -Would someone please
show this jackass the door?
63
00:05:42,376 --> 00:05:44,076
I already saw the door
on my way in.
64
00:05:44,078 --> 00:05:47,412
Now, sir, my life story
yearns to be told.
65
00:05:47,414 --> 00:05:49,348
It's a tale of intrigue,
adventure
66
00:05:49,350 --> 00:05:51,316
and life among the clouds.
67
00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:53,719
Mr. Gaye,
68
00:05:53,721 --> 00:05:56,588
if you held a gun to my head
and said to me,
69
00:05:56,590 --> 00:05:59,458
"Hey, be less interested
in my book"
70
00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:03,562
"or I will splatter the walls
with the contents of your skull,"
71
00:06:04,764 --> 00:06:06,331
I don't think I could.
72
00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,935
I guess I'll just have
to take my story elsewhere.
73
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:17,743
There are other fish in the
publishing sea, my friend.
74
00:06:19,445 --> 00:06:22,013
Yes, in Manhattan,
I'm gonna need two numbers,
75
00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:25,250
the first one is for Simon, and
then I need one for Schuster.
76
00:06:27,888 --> 00:06:31,623
Look, if I walk out that door,
guys, I'm not coming back!
77
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:32,791
You got it?
78
00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:35,594
Oh, you think I'm bluffing?
79
00:06:36,262 --> 00:06:37,763
You think I'm bluffing?
80
00:06:37,765 --> 00:06:39,931
Good day, everyone!
81
00:06:50,543 --> 00:06:51,610
Okay.
82
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:54,746
I'm headed to the elevator.
83
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:57,783
- Do we have any kind
of screening process here?
84
00:06:57,785 --> 00:07:00,051
Okay. I'm in the elevator.
85
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:02,387
- Get out.
- Yep. Yes.
86
00:07:03,356 --> 00:07:05,357
It's closing.
The door is closing.
87
00:07:05,359 --> 00:07:08,393
- The door is closing.
88
00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:11,096
Last chance!
89
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:14,266
If I get in a taxi,
you're out of luck!
90
00:07:24,677 --> 00:07:26,695
Is there a quicker way to
the airport, my friend?
91
00:07:26,721 --> 00:07:27,946
I'm running late for a flight.
92
00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:29,981
Sorry, man,
it's like this all over.
93
00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:34,519
- Rush hour traffic, you know.
- I know that accent.
94
00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,588
What part of Canada
are you from?
95
00:07:38,357 --> 00:07:40,158
I'm from Jamaica.
96
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:44,129
Yeah, but you obviously lived
in Canada for a long time.
97
00:07:44,131 --> 00:07:46,064
No, man, never been there.
98
00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:49,768
But your parents were Canadian
and spoke it around the house.
99
00:07:49,770 --> 00:07:50,936
No, man!
100
00:07:53,439 --> 00:07:57,876
Bet you never had to worry aboot
traffic like this in Saskatchewan,
101
00:07:57,878 --> 00:07:59,444
eh?
102
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:01,713
Eh?
103
00:08:36,082 --> 00:08:37,182
Who's that guy?
104
00:08:58,170 --> 00:09:00,405
I can help you with that bag.
All right.
105
00:09:02,241 --> 00:09:05,544
Please be careful! I have my grandfather's
remains in an urn up there.
106
00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:08,113
- I will, sir.
- Excuse me!
107
00:09:08,115 --> 00:09:11,116
This woman claims she's in 9E,
but that's my seat.
108
00:09:11,118 --> 00:09:14,119
I'll try to straighten
that out. Okay?
109
00:09:14,121 --> 00:09:16,988
I can't remember if I ordered a
kosher meal or not. Can you help me?
110
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,870
Okay. If you can just give me one
second, I will check that, I promise.
111
00:09:25,731 --> 00:09:28,466
Okay, people, please, please, please, okay?
It's my very first flight
112
00:09:28,468 --> 00:09:31,603
and our lead attendant is not here,
but I'm doing the best that I can.
113
00:09:31,605 --> 00:09:33,705
So, please, bear with me.
114
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:40,145
Grandpa!
115
00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:51,256
Excuse me.
116
00:09:51,891 --> 00:09:53,358
Is there a problem here?
117
00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:55,293
Allow me.
118
00:10:11,477 --> 00:10:13,044
Anything else?
119
00:10:13,046 --> 00:10:14,179
She's in my seat.
120
00:10:16,816 --> 00:10:17,983
Oh.
121
00:10:17,985 --> 00:10:20,619
Actually, ma'am,
you're not in 9E.
122
00:10:20,621 --> 00:10:23,321
You're in 3b.
123
00:10:23,990 --> 00:10:25,423
Common mistake.
124
00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:29,995
I've been trying to find out
if I ordered a kosher meal.
125
00:10:29,997 --> 00:10:32,330
Rabbi, I got the passenger
manifest in advance,
126
00:10:32,332 --> 00:10:36,668
so I personally prepared you a nice piece
of chicken with a side of borscht.
127
00:10:36,670 --> 00:10:38,036
Thank you, my son.
128
00:10:40,841 --> 00:10:43,208
What about my grandpa? Look.
129
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:55,920
- Gramps comin' at ya!
130
00:10:58,458 --> 00:10:59,891
Thanks.
You really saved me there.
131
00:10:59,893 --> 00:11:02,494
You saying "Thanks"
is thanks enough.
132
00:11:02,862 --> 00:11:04,462
Um, okay.
133
00:11:05,398 --> 00:11:07,465
- I guess we're ready.
- Not yet.
134
00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:09,334
My finely honed senses
tells me there's someone
135
00:11:09,336 --> 00:11:11,670
on board this flight
who's a threat to us all.
136
00:11:29,989 --> 00:11:31,589
You, sir.
137
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:34,592
Frat guy, huh?
138
00:11:34,594 --> 00:11:37,696
- Oh, Phi Beta Kappa, it's an
academic fraternity. -Oh?
139
00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:40,365
You like to drink,
get out of control,
140
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:42,967
you boot and rally,
you cause a scene.
141
00:11:42,969 --> 00:11:45,370
No, I don't drink.
I'm a Rhodes Scholar.
142
00:11:45,372 --> 00:11:47,672
I'm actually flying to UCLA
to collect an award.
143
00:11:47,674 --> 00:11:49,774
I won't have those kind
of shenanigans on my flight!
144
00:11:49,776 --> 00:11:51,276
Take a hike, party boy!
145
00:11:51,278 --> 00:11:53,545
- No, but I'm...
- Save it, Animal House!
146
00:11:53,946 --> 00:11:55,213
Off my plane!
147
00:11:57,149 --> 00:11:58,483
Off my plane!
148
00:12:09,929 --> 00:12:12,197
Okay, rookie,
let's fly this bitch.
149
00:12:29,782 --> 00:12:31,649
Miss McCoy, it's all yours.
150
00:12:32,818 --> 00:12:34,119
Thank you.
151
00:12:34,121 --> 00:12:38,156
Gentlemen and ladies, what do
we spend the most money on?
152
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,961
- Passenger safety.
153
00:12:45,799 --> 00:12:48,767
Stop it, Geddes, stop it!
This is serious.
154
00:12:48,769 --> 00:12:51,836
Outside of equipment,
fuel and brass tacks,
155
00:12:51,838 --> 00:12:55,140
our greatest operating expense
is service.
156
00:12:56,108 --> 00:12:58,176
Flight attendants.
157
00:12:58,178 --> 00:13:00,345
- Yes.
- Their union is strong,
158
00:13:00,347 --> 00:13:03,715
their salaries keep rising.
Not to mention their benefits.
159
00:13:03,717 --> 00:13:04,883
But what if I told you
there was a way
160
00:13:04,885 --> 00:13:08,319
to completely eliminate
human flight attendants?
161
00:13:08,321 --> 00:13:11,082
Even if we could, where
would you hide the bodies?
162
00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,958
Oh, just asking.
163
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:17,095
Gentlemen, there is someone
I would like for you to meet.
164
00:13:23,102 --> 00:13:24,636
Good morning, Miss McCoy.
165
00:13:25,771 --> 00:13:27,472
Good morning, Sally.
166
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:29,774
Sally, may I have
a cup of coffee, please?
167
00:13:29,776 --> 00:13:30,842
My pleasure.
168
00:13:36,048 --> 00:13:37,849
Thank you, Sally.
169
00:13:39,753 --> 00:13:42,387
Oh, this coffee is way too hot!
170
00:13:42,389 --> 00:13:44,689
Oh.
171
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:51,563
I'm sorry, Miss McCoy. I'll find
some more coffee that's not so hot.
172
00:13:51,565 --> 00:13:53,965
- What the...
- She's not real!
173
00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:56,367
- Right, Sally?
- That's right, Miss McCoy.
174
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:58,369
My body is state-of-the-art
neoprene
175
00:13:58,371 --> 00:14:00,772
stretched over a complex
electronic framework,
176
00:14:00,774 --> 00:14:02,373
my brain is a powerful
microprocessor
177
00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:04,375
capable of five billion
decisions per second
178
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:06,678
and my boobs are a perky 34C.
179
00:14:07,079 --> 00:14:08,379
This is amazing.
180
00:14:08,381 --> 00:14:11,015
Go ahead, touch her. You'd
never know the difference.
181
00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:12,684
- What?
- Touch her.
182
00:14:15,387 --> 00:14:18,223
You mean, just... Wow!
183
00:14:31,470 --> 00:14:33,338
I'm Nathan, by the way.
184
00:14:33,340 --> 00:14:34,772
The pleasure's yours, Nathan.
185
00:14:36,675 --> 00:14:38,409
That was incredible, all the
stuff you did back there.
186
00:14:38,411 --> 00:14:40,845
I'm not sure "incredible"
is the right word.
187
00:14:40,847 --> 00:14:42,347
I believe it's "uncredible."
188
00:14:43,616 --> 00:14:45,450
I'm pretty sure
it's "incredible."
189
00:14:45,452 --> 00:14:47,485
Let's agree not to disagree.
190
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,421
I don't think
that's the expression.
191
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:53,157
Are you disagreeing with me?
We just agreed not to.
192
00:14:55,327 --> 00:14:57,729
You were saying?
193
00:14:57,731 --> 00:14:59,931
They sure didn't teach us any of
that stuff at the training academy.
194
00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:01,733
Yeah, that's why I never
listen to what they teach.
195
00:15:01,735 --> 00:15:04,335
I make my own rules,
then I break 'em.
196
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:07,272
But if they're your own rules,
why do you have to break 'em?
197
00:15:07,274 --> 00:15:08,940
- Well, I...
- Wouldn't it be easier
198
00:15:08,942 --> 00:15:10,775
to make up different rules
that you didn't have to break?
199
00:15:10,777 --> 00:15:13,278
- Not necessarily. -Or to not
make up any rules at all.
200
00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,647
The point is, I'm a renegade.
201
00:15:15,649 --> 00:15:18,383
Wait a minute.
You're Larry Gaye!
202
00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:20,051
My first day and I get to fly
203
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:21,853
- with Larry Gaye?
- So cool.
204
00:15:21,855 --> 00:15:24,722
My God, the stories, the women.
205
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:27,825
- Six Golden Coffee Pots!
206
00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:29,928
You're a legend.
207
00:15:29,930 --> 00:15:31,729
Relax. Look.
208
00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:34,899
I know this may come as a shock,
but I'm just a human being.
209
00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:37,702
I mean, if you cut me, I bleed.
210
00:15:37,704 --> 00:15:40,004
If you pinch me, I cry.
211
00:15:41,573 --> 00:15:45,443
If you pull my hair,
I scream like a little girl.
212
00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:47,779
If you back an SUV
over my bare feet,
213
00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:50,548
I'd likely go into shock.
The pain is so intense.
214
00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:53,785
If you eliminate vitamins
B and D from my diet,
215
00:15:53,787 --> 00:15:56,888
my skin turns a shade of taupe
you've never seen.
216
00:16:02,728 --> 00:16:04,696
I can't breathe.
217
00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:06,965
Hello.
218
00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:08,967
Carry on, please.
219
00:16:09,835 --> 00:16:12,503
You're looking at
the new Flightpal 200
220
00:16:12,505 --> 00:16:14,739
made by Techtronics Industries.
221
00:16:14,741 --> 00:16:18,609
Now, for a fraction of the
cost of a flight attendant,
222
00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:20,878
we can have
every one of our planes
223
00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:23,648
fully manned by Flightpals
224
00:16:23,650 --> 00:16:26,150
within one year.
225
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:28,119
Excuse me, Miss McCoy.
226
00:16:28,121 --> 00:16:31,022
The reputation of this airline
is built on service.
227
00:16:31,024 --> 00:16:34,292
How do you know
that the Flightpal 200
228
00:16:34,294 --> 00:16:36,427
is better
than our flight attendants?
229
00:16:36,429 --> 00:16:37,962
That's a great question.
230
00:16:37,964 --> 00:16:39,430
Ladies and gentlemen,
231
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:42,734
the President and Founder
of Techtronics Industries,
232
00:16:43,135 --> 00:16:44,969
Bob Techtronics.
233
00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:48,639
Folks, I wouldn't expect you to
just sign on the dotted line.
234
00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:51,009
I only ask for the opportunity
to prove to you
235
00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:54,679
that the Flightpal can
outperform an error-prone human.
236
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:57,081
And how do you plan
on doing that?
237
00:16:57,083 --> 00:17:00,051
By letting Sally here
go up against your best
238
00:17:00,053 --> 00:17:02,887
in a challenge
of flight attendant skills.
239
00:17:02,889 --> 00:17:05,089
- That sounds fair, doesn't it?
- Absolutely. Let's set it up.
240
00:17:05,091 --> 00:17:08,960
If it works, it could be a financial
lifesaver for the entire company.
241
00:17:08,962 --> 00:17:11,262
Thank you so much, Mr. T.
242
00:17:11,264 --> 00:17:12,597
Sally, we'll talk.
243
00:17:13,465 --> 00:17:15,033
If you remove
244
00:17:15,035 --> 00:17:17,535
the vestibular system from my inner
ear, I have difficulty balancing.
245
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:21,639
If you take a croquet mallet,
coat it with shards of glass
246
00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:24,375
- and swing it directly at my testes...
- Okay, you're human!
247
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,677
- You made your point.
- I think I've made my point.
248
00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:35,086
Well, look who it is.
249
00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:38,356
Bryce. Felder.
250
00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:40,992
That's "Captain" to you.
251
00:17:40,994 --> 00:17:44,395
Sorry, Crapton Bryce.
252
00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,164
How you feeling today, Gaye?
253
00:17:47,232 --> 00:17:50,101
Are you getting sleepier?
254
00:17:50,803 --> 00:17:53,171
Oh, snap!
255
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:08,953
It's ancient history, Nathan,
like the Romanian Empire.
256
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:11,650
- But...
- I said,
257
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:13,291
ancient history.
258
00:18:14,660 --> 00:18:16,928
- Okay. Got it.
259
00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:19,330
Uh...
260
00:18:19,332 --> 00:18:22,300
Ladies and gentlemen,Captain Bryce here.
261
00:18:22,302 --> 00:18:24,569
Just wanted to speakas your pilot
262
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:26,270
and nota lowly flight attendant,
263
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:29,040
and say it's greatto be piloting this plane
264
00:18:29,708 --> 00:18:31,576
because I'm a pilot
265
00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:33,811
who passed throughthe pilot training academy
266
00:18:33,813 --> 00:18:36,547
and became a pilot.
267
00:19:14,820 --> 00:19:16,554
These big union meetings
tend to drag
268
00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:18,756
like a turtle's nut sack,
am I right?
269
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:21,559
Excuse me?
Show some respect.
270
00:19:22,461 --> 00:19:24,128
What's that?
271
00:19:24,130 --> 00:19:27,999
Actually, I find them
interesting and informative.
272
00:19:28,001 --> 00:19:30,234
Uh, surely
you can't be serious.
273
00:19:30,236 --> 00:19:31,936
I am serious.
274
00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:34,272
- Then should I stop
calling you Shirley?
275
00:19:44,717 --> 00:19:46,450
Ladies and gentlemen,
276
00:19:46,452 --> 00:19:48,386
and membersof the Fraternal Association
277
00:19:48,388 --> 00:19:51,322
of Federated AirlinesFlight Attendants, welcome.
278
00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:54,358
Management hasasked us to select
279
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,961
our top flight attendant
280
00:19:56,963 --> 00:20:00,031
to go up against the Flightpal
281
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:02,066
in a performance test.
282
00:20:02,068 --> 00:20:06,671
And the Research Committeehas given me one name.
283
00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:08,973
Which one of you is Gaye?
284
00:20:15,847 --> 00:20:17,281
Larry Gaye.
285
00:20:18,850 --> 00:20:21,452
- That'd be me.
- Ah!
286
00:20:21,454 --> 00:20:24,355
Mr. Gaye,just how good are you?
287
00:20:24,357 --> 00:20:26,724
On a scale from one to 10,
288
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,859
it can't be quantified.
289
00:20:28,861 --> 00:20:31,062
Perhaps you wouldtry to quantify.
290
00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:33,264
Well...
291
00:20:33,266 --> 00:20:35,433
I have won
an unprecedented six,
292
00:20:35,435 --> 00:20:38,336
count them, six, consecutive
Golden Coffee Pots.
293
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:39,570
Roll the clip!
294
00:20:40,672 --> 00:20:43,407
- -Uh, guys, I...
295
00:20:43,409 --> 00:20:46,110
I don't know what to say,except maybe,
296
00:20:46,112 --> 00:20:48,713
suck it,other flight attendants!
297
00:20:48,715 --> 00:20:50,147
Suck it dry!
298
00:20:50,149 --> 00:20:52,550
Hey, hey, hey! You cut it off
before my dance. Not cool.
299
00:20:52,552 --> 00:20:54,919
Mr. Gaye,I want to ask you,
300
00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:59,390
will you help spare the jobsof everyone in this room
301
00:20:59,392 --> 00:21:02,026
and thousands of othersnationwide?
302
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:09,500
Seems like a hassle. Pass!
303
00:21:09,502 --> 00:21:10,835
I'm gonna pass!
304
00:21:12,638 --> 00:21:14,505
No. Mr. Gaye!
- Larry.
305
00:21:14,507 --> 00:21:16,474
What? What? What?
306
00:21:16,476 --> 00:21:19,710
We need you.Our livelihood depends on it.
307
00:21:26,485 --> 00:21:27,685
Fine, I'll do it.
308
00:21:27,687 --> 00:21:29,253
- I'll do it!
309
00:21:29,255 --> 00:21:31,689
Ladies and gentlemen
of the FAFAFA, worry not!
310
00:21:31,691 --> 00:21:34,825
I will take on this scourge
and I will win.
311
00:21:34,827 --> 00:21:37,528
Nothing on God's green Earth
will stop me!
312
00:21:37,530 --> 00:21:39,697
- -Thank you, Mr. Gaye.Thank you.
313
00:21:39,699 --> 00:21:41,766
As long as it's not on a Tuesday morning.
I have a Zumba class.
314
00:21:41,768 --> 00:21:43,267
Okay.
315
00:21:43,269 --> 00:21:46,070
Or Saturdays at 3:00. I have a
standing body wax. Gotta do that.
316
00:21:46,072 --> 00:21:48,973
Wednesdays aren't great.
Hump day.
317
00:21:48,975 --> 00:21:50,808
And I take
that quite literally.
318
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,310
- You know what I'm talking about.
- Thank you, Mr. Gaye.
319
00:21:52,312 --> 00:21:53,611
Larry Gaye,ladies and gentlemen.
320
00:21:53,613 --> 00:21:55,846
- Larry Gaye, thank you.
- You got it.
321
00:21:57,183 --> 00:22:00,751
Larry!
322
00:22:07,693 --> 00:22:10,895
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome
aboard Federated Airlines Flight 75
323
00:22:10,897 --> 00:22:12,997
with non-stop serviceto Los Angeles.
324
00:22:12,999 --> 00:22:15,099
We'll be taxiingin just a few moments.
325
00:22:15,101 --> 00:22:16,767
But first, allow meto demonstrate
326
00:22:16,769 --> 00:22:19,870
the safety featuresof our Boeing 737.
327
00:22:19,872 --> 00:22:21,872
Nathan. Thank you.
328
00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:23,674
You fasten the seatbelt
329
00:22:23,676 --> 00:22:25,676
by inserting the metal end
330
00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:33,184
into the expectant buckle.
331
00:22:33,186 --> 00:22:36,120
A little at first, you know,just enough to
332
00:22:37,155 --> 00:22:38,656
tease the buckle.
333
00:22:40,092 --> 00:22:41,459
You want some of that?
334
00:22:42,761 --> 00:22:44,161
Hmm, yeah.
335
00:22:46,231 --> 00:22:47,932
Ohh!
336
00:22:47,934 --> 00:22:51,369
Take that buckle.Take it! Yeah.
337
00:22:51,371 --> 00:22:53,237
- Mmm, yeah.
-
338
00:22:53,239 --> 00:22:54,739
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
339
00:22:54,741 --> 00:22:56,307
Yeah, yeah.
340
00:22:56,309 --> 00:22:58,843
And finally, when that bucklejust can't take any more,
341
00:22:58,845 --> 00:23:01,312
you pull on this thingto release it.
342
00:23:03,950 --> 00:23:07,051
We don't anticipate it, but should
there be a change in cabin pressure,
343
00:23:07,053 --> 00:23:09,553
your oxygen maskwill drop down.
344
00:23:09,555 --> 00:23:12,990
You place the maskover your mouth, like so.
345
00:23:21,433 --> 00:23:23,267
Mmm, yeah.
346
00:23:24,703 --> 00:23:26,570
Okay.
347
00:23:26,572 --> 00:23:29,240
For those of you seatedin an emergency exit row,
348
00:23:29,242 --> 00:23:32,710
like, uh, I don't know,say you.
349
00:23:33,912 --> 00:23:36,914
If called upon to openthe emergency door, well,
350
00:23:38,250 --> 00:23:40,290
you're gonna pullon that big lever.
351
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:44,488
Yeah, yeah, you're gonnapull on it real nice
352
00:23:45,291 --> 00:23:48,759
Ooh, I bet you know how to
pull that thing just right.
353
00:23:48,761 --> 00:23:49,894
Yeah, you knowwhat I'm talking about.
354
00:23:49,896 --> 00:23:51,195
You knowwhat I'm talking about,
355
00:23:51,197 --> 00:23:52,797
-you naughty little tart.
356
00:23:52,799 --> 00:23:54,498
Flight attendants,please be seated for take-off.
357
00:23:54,500 --> 00:23:57,501
Okay. Power downall electronic devices.
358
00:23:57,503 --> 00:23:59,303
We'll be up in the air shortly.
359
00:23:59,305 --> 00:24:00,838
Thank you, everybody.
360
00:24:04,075 --> 00:24:07,378
We have got a live one in 10b.
361
00:24:07,380 --> 00:24:09,621
I think those instructions
could have been clearer.
362
00:24:17,924 --> 00:24:20,825
Uh, folks, we're aboutto start our in-flight movie,
363
00:24:20,827 --> 00:24:23,661
License to Chill.
364
00:24:23,663 --> 00:24:25,596
Audio can be foundon Channel 10.
365
00:24:29,202 --> 00:24:32,102
- Hey, Nate, can you grab the
disk out of my bag? -Yeah.
366
00:24:32,104 --> 00:24:34,738
Gaye, I asked for a Fresca
five minutes ago.
367
00:24:34,740 --> 00:24:36,974
What happened?
Did you trip over your skirt?
368
00:24:36,976 --> 00:24:39,977
So sorry, I was, uh...
I was about to bring it in.
369
00:24:41,646 --> 00:24:45,483
Well, maybe if you spent less time flirting
with your little gal pal over there,
370
00:24:45,485 --> 00:24:48,486
you'd be able
to focus on your job.
371
00:24:48,488 --> 00:24:51,722
I already do focus on my job
as six, count them, six,
372
00:24:51,724 --> 00:24:54,758
Golden Coffee Pots can attest.
373
00:24:54,760 --> 00:24:56,594
Oh, that's right. I forgot.
374
00:24:58,096 --> 00:25:01,432
How does it feel working with the
biggest wussy in the business?
375
00:25:01,434 --> 00:25:03,434
- Well...
- Don't talk!
376
00:25:03,436 --> 00:25:05,002
I gotta go fly this bird.
377
00:25:12,879 --> 00:25:14,989
Are you gonna tell me
what's that all about?
378
00:25:15,015 --> 00:25:15,880
Sorry, Nathan.
379
00:25:15,882 --> 00:25:17,748
I'm an intensely
private person.
380
00:25:17,750 --> 00:25:19,984
You made a deal to publish your
autobiography so you could,
381
00:25:19,986 --> 00:25:23,087
and I quote, "Share your
story with the world."
382
00:25:23,089 --> 00:25:24,488
It's unauthorized.
383
00:25:33,865 --> 00:25:35,766
Fine. I guess
you'll read it anyway.
384
00:25:37,102 --> 00:25:39,236
It all started
when I was a little boy...
385
00:25:39,238 --> 00:25:40,938
- Uh, Larry...
- Please don't interrupt.
386
00:25:40,940 --> 00:25:42,606
You asked for the story.
Now let me tell it.
387
00:25:42,608 --> 00:25:44,742
- No, but it's... -Hey!
Here's how it works up here.
388
00:25:44,744 --> 00:25:46,377
When a veteran
is telling a rookie a story,
389
00:25:46,379 --> 00:25:49,213
the rookie, you, listens,
390
00:25:49,215 --> 00:25:51,181
sans interruption. Sans!
391
00:25:53,485 --> 00:25:55,819
As I was saying,
392
00:25:55,821 --> 00:25:58,622
I loved my fathermore than anything.
393
00:25:58,624 --> 00:26:01,325
So when he left me,I was devastated.
394
00:26:01,327 --> 00:26:04,662
- -Even if it wasonly for a few minutes.
395
00:26:07,833 --> 00:26:13,304
Well, you can imagine how upset
I was when he left for good.
396
00:26:14,773 --> 00:26:16,173
Where are you going, Dad?
397
00:26:16,175 --> 00:26:20,544
Hey-hey, there he is.
398
00:26:20,546 --> 00:26:22,479
There he always is.
399
00:26:22,481 --> 00:26:24,615
I'm... I'm...
400
00:26:24,617 --> 00:26:28,385
I'm just going out to have
these suitcases polished.
401
00:26:28,387 --> 00:26:30,147
But it's the middle
of the night.
402
00:26:31,122 --> 00:26:32,623
Yes, it is. Yes, it is.
403
00:26:32,625 --> 00:26:34,625
And there is a, uh,
404
00:26:34,627 --> 00:26:38,395
24-hour suitcase polisher
over on State Street.
405
00:26:38,397 --> 00:26:40,264
Oh, okay.
406
00:26:42,067 --> 00:26:43,434
Good night.
407
00:26:43,436 --> 00:26:45,970
Good night, Son.
Have a good life.
408
00:26:45,972 --> 00:26:48,572
Until tomorrow morning,
409
00:26:48,574 --> 00:26:51,809
when I will see you again
410
00:26:51,811 --> 00:26:56,580
because I'm definitely
not running out on you
411
00:26:56,582 --> 00:26:58,949
or your mother,
412
00:26:58,951 --> 00:27:02,920
or the life of debt and
dysfunction we've built together.
413
00:27:04,756 --> 00:27:07,825
But I wasn't stupid. It didn't
take long to figure out
414
00:27:07,827 --> 00:27:10,461
that somewhere on his way to
the 24-hour suitcase polisher,
415
00:27:10,463 --> 00:27:12,329
-he decided to leave for good.
416
00:27:19,004 --> 00:27:21,105
My mom triedeverything she could
417
00:27:21,107 --> 00:27:23,774
to take my mind offthe hurt of Dad leaving,
418
00:27:26,544 --> 00:27:28,245
but nothing could distract me.
419
00:27:28,914 --> 00:27:32,449
In an all-new episode of
Boys Whose Fathers Love Them
420
00:27:32,451 --> 00:27:33,951
and Have Not Run Off
Unexpectedly...
421
00:27:33,953 --> 00:27:35,786
No!
422
00:27:35,788 --> 00:27:38,422
I knew of no way to makethe pain go away.
423
00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:44,728
Until that moment,
424
00:27:44,730 --> 00:27:48,232
when I realized that if I could be
way up in the clouds, then maybe
425
00:27:48,234 --> 00:27:52,436
it would take me away from the
hurt I felt down on the ground.
426
00:27:52,438 --> 00:27:55,773
And that's when I decided that
what I wanted more than anything
427
00:27:56,174 --> 00:27:57,641
was to fly.
428
00:27:58,977 --> 00:28:01,779
- Larry, behind you. -Yes,
that chapter was behind me.
429
00:28:01,781 --> 00:28:03,213
Well observed.
430
00:28:03,215 --> 00:28:06,116
Then, in 1995,
I went to flight school.
431
00:28:09,054 --> 00:28:11,855
Building 5.
Orientation's on the right.
432
00:28:14,125 --> 00:28:16,260
- Hi.
- Hi there.
433
00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:17,761
I'm Gaye.
434
00:28:18,663 --> 00:28:19,730
Really?
435
00:28:21,032 --> 00:28:22,099
Uh...
436
00:28:24,335 --> 00:28:26,503
I have a private bunk
437
00:28:26,505 --> 00:28:29,440
with the only bathtub
in this whole facility.
438
00:28:29,442 --> 00:28:31,542
Cadet Larry Gaye.
439
00:28:31,544 --> 00:28:35,045
- Right. Uh, building 5. Orientation's
on the right. -Thank you.
440
00:28:39,017 --> 00:28:40,751
That's what I'm talking about.
441
00:28:41,886 --> 00:28:44,188
Here, here
442
00:28:44,190 --> 00:28:46,423
and especially here.
443
00:28:47,692 --> 00:28:51,161
Ladies and gentlemen, you need
to know these principles cold.
444
00:28:51,163 --> 00:28:54,331
I had big dreams,and even bigger confidence.
445
00:28:54,333 --> 00:28:58,035
I was gonna be the best
damn pilot in the world.
446
00:28:58,037 --> 00:29:01,672
All right.
Define lift. Gaye.
447
00:29:03,541 --> 00:29:06,677
A positive force caused by the
difference in air pressure
448
00:29:06,679 --> 00:29:08,746
- under and above a wing, sir.
- Drag?
449
00:29:08,748 --> 00:29:11,882
The resistance of the air to
anything moving through it, sir!
450
00:29:11,884 --> 00:29:13,117
And thrust?
451
00:29:15,653 --> 00:29:17,187
Damn, he's good.
452
00:29:18,656 --> 00:29:20,324
E, P, H,
453
00:29:20,326 --> 00:29:22,726
- T, O, Z.
- Good.
454
00:29:22,728 --> 00:29:24,294
The bottom line, please?
455
00:29:27,232 --> 00:29:28,298
That's...
456
00:29:29,367 --> 00:29:32,169
J, M, V...
457
00:29:32,171 --> 00:29:34,772
No, no, no.
That's not correct.
458
00:29:34,774 --> 00:29:37,908
Uh, actually, Doc,
I'm working off that chart.
459
00:29:37,910 --> 00:29:40,878
- Are you kidding me?
- H, R,
460
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:42,746
S, C, C, F.
461
00:29:42,748 --> 00:29:46,049
Copyright 1983,
printed in the Philippines.
462
00:29:46,051 --> 00:29:47,551
Bastard.
463
00:29:48,620 --> 00:29:50,788
Reduce airspeed 50 knots.
464
00:29:55,026 --> 00:29:56,860
Lower angle of left wing.
465
00:29:57,929 --> 00:30:00,297
Come on. Challenge me, bud.
466
00:30:00,299 --> 00:30:03,233
I wasn't cocky. I justknew what I was doing...
467
00:30:03,235 --> 00:30:04,735
Deploy landing gear.
468
00:30:06,271 --> 00:30:09,840
And bragged about it,in an obnoxious way.
469
00:30:09,842 --> 00:30:11,802
What's the matter?
You need to use your hands?
470
00:30:16,648 --> 00:30:20,484
That's right. I was on my way
and nothing was gonna stop me.
471
00:30:24,222 --> 00:30:26,190
So what happened?
472
00:30:26,192 --> 00:30:28,425
All that was left
was the actual flying.
473
00:30:31,063 --> 00:30:32,763
You're coming in too hot, Gaye.
474
00:30:33,631 --> 00:30:35,666
You're... You'reway off course!
475
00:30:36,334 --> 00:30:38,135
Gaye, can you hear me?
476
00:30:39,537 --> 00:30:40,838
Gaye! Wake up!
477
00:30:48,447 --> 00:30:50,147
Wake up, wake up.
478
00:30:51,850 --> 00:30:53,890
Yeah, there's something
wrong with this kid.
479
00:30:58,356 --> 00:31:01,892
Gaye, I've got some bad news.
480
00:31:01,894 --> 00:31:05,729
And it's my job to give it to you in
the most professional way possible.
481
00:31:07,599 --> 00:31:09,733
Guess what it is.
482
00:31:09,735 --> 00:31:13,604
- Heart disease?
- No.
483
00:31:13,606 --> 00:31:15,839
- Measles?
- You're getting cooler.
484
00:31:16,507 --> 00:31:19,509
Oh, uh, okay, okay, okay, um...
485
00:31:21,379 --> 00:31:22,913
- Nervous disorder.
- Mmm, mmm, mmm.
486
00:31:22,915 --> 00:31:24,281
- That's warmer.
- Okay.
487
00:31:24,283 --> 00:31:26,350
- Mumps?
- No, colder.
488
00:31:26,352 --> 00:31:27,784
- Anemia.
- Oh, you're ice-cold.
489
00:31:27,786 --> 00:31:29,853
Come on! Doc, just tell me.
490
00:31:29,855 --> 00:31:32,222
- You have narcolepsy.
- Oh.
491
00:31:32,224 --> 00:31:35,125
It's a neurological disorder
caused by the brain's inability
492
00:31:35,127 --> 00:31:38,095
to regulate sleep-wake cycles.
493
00:31:38,097 --> 00:31:40,858
In other words, you fall
asleep uncontrollably.
494
00:31:41,599 --> 00:31:43,367
- That's ridic...
- Hmm?
495
00:31:44,235 --> 00:31:45,903
Sorry, I thought
I had to sneeze.
496
00:31:45,905 --> 00:31:47,738
Oh, I thought you
were having a stroke.
497
00:31:47,740 --> 00:31:48,972
That's ridiculous.
498
00:32:07,325 --> 00:32:08,825
- Yes!
499
00:32:20,271 --> 00:32:24,441
So, my dreams of being a pilot were
smashed into a thousand pieces.
500
00:32:24,443 --> 00:32:26,410
The only way I was gonna
fly was in this apron,
501
00:32:26,412 --> 00:32:29,279
and Bryce and Felder
never let me forget it.
502
00:32:30,448 --> 00:32:32,349
But it's all in the past.
503
00:32:32,351 --> 00:32:35,085
Never even think about it.
I'm as happy as I seem.
504
00:32:39,490 --> 00:32:41,091
I'm glad you're over it.
505
00:32:44,829 --> 00:32:46,663
Someone's playing our song.
506
00:32:51,869 --> 00:32:52,936
Ah.
507
00:32:54,372 --> 00:32:56,139
Is there something
I can help you with?
508
00:32:56,141 --> 00:32:59,142
I wanted to tell you how much
I'm enjoying the movie.
509
00:32:59,144 --> 00:33:03,080
It's not Ice Age 2 or even
3, but it's a jaunty romp,
510
00:33:03,082 --> 00:33:04,282
it's pleasantly paced.
511
00:33:07,385 --> 00:33:08,752
Turbulence.
512
00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:10,654
Excuse me for a second.
513
00:33:15,994 --> 00:33:19,229
Oh! Uh, folks, folks, folks.
514
00:33:19,231 --> 00:33:22,866
- We gave you the wrong
- License to Chill.
515
00:33:22,868 --> 00:33:25,969
That was the director's cut, with
some scenes that had been omitted,
516
00:33:25,971 --> 00:33:29,306
and I think wisely so.
517
00:33:29,308 --> 00:33:32,709
Here's some morefamily friendly entertainment.
518
00:33:43,021 --> 00:33:44,254
How are you?
519
00:33:47,091 --> 00:33:48,792
You were saying.
520
00:33:48,794 --> 00:33:51,595
Perhaps someday you and I
could make a movie like that.
521
00:33:51,597 --> 00:33:53,563
License to Chill?
522
00:33:53,565 --> 00:33:58,735
No, I mean, I'd like you to make
love to me in every way imaginable.
523
00:34:07,612 --> 00:34:09,546
Ooh.
524
00:34:09,548 --> 00:34:12,315
Shall we ignore the fact that it smells
like Death's underpants in here?
525
00:34:12,317 --> 00:34:13,383
Let's.
526
00:34:13,385 --> 00:34:15,385
Okay, can I get you a drink?
527
00:34:15,387 --> 00:34:17,687
- Vodka, rocks.
- Yes, it does.
528
00:34:18,923 --> 00:34:20,323
Oh, right.
529
00:34:31,470 --> 00:34:33,370
- Thank you.
530
00:34:33,372 --> 00:34:34,604
That'll be $6.
531
00:34:37,175 --> 00:34:38,575
- Oh.
- Hmm.
532
00:34:39,677 --> 00:34:40,777
Oh.
533
00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:46,316
Ah, yes. Um, do you
happen to have exact change?
534
00:34:46,318 --> 00:34:47,484
No, I don't.
535
00:34:47,486 --> 00:34:49,287
What are we gonna
do about that?
536
00:34:57,495 --> 00:34:58,595
Here.
537
00:35:00,565 --> 00:35:01,832
Where were we?
538
00:35:01,834 --> 00:35:03,834
I wanna know
everything about you.
539
00:35:03,836 --> 00:35:05,669
I want to feel
what it's like to touch you.
540
00:35:05,671 --> 00:35:07,804
I want your body
to possess my body.
541
00:35:07,806 --> 00:35:09,272
In a sexual way?
542
00:35:15,413 --> 00:35:17,614
Hi, there.
543
00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:22,052
So, uh, we're all out of beef stew,
would you like some lasagna?
544
00:35:22,720 --> 00:35:25,422
Oh, but I love beef stew.
545
00:35:26,524 --> 00:35:28,492
Oh, this sucks.
546
00:35:29,694 --> 00:35:30,794
I apologize, sir.
547
00:35:30,796 --> 00:35:32,462
- No!
- Okay, all right.
548
00:35:33,364 --> 00:35:36,266
Oh, uh, glad
I could help, ma'am.
549
00:35:36,268 --> 00:35:37,934
If anyone else needs
help with the faucets,
550
00:35:37,936 --> 00:35:40,804
please don't hesitate to call,
they can be a tad tricky.
551
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,075
If you could just
give me one moment.
552
00:35:46,077 --> 00:35:47,277
Hmm.
553
00:35:48,447 --> 00:35:52,149
Presiding over an emergency
meeting of the Mile High Club.
554
00:35:52,151 --> 00:35:53,726
Well, I'm glad you had fun.
We ran out of
555
00:35:53,752 --> 00:35:55,452
beef stew, these people
are ready to kill me.
556
00:35:55,454 --> 00:35:56,987
Did you tell them we ran out?
557
00:35:56,989 --> 00:36:02,626
Okay, rookie, lesson one. It's not beef
stew they want, they just want a choice.
558
00:36:02,628 --> 00:36:06,329
- But there is no... -Watch and
learn from a professional.
559
00:36:07,431 --> 00:36:10,400
Oh, left the
luggage hatch open.
560
00:36:10,402 --> 00:36:16,740
Folks, for dinner we have lasagna
or a stew of beef and brown lice.
561
00:36:16,742 --> 00:36:18,074
Well, I'll have the lasagna.
562
00:36:18,076 --> 00:36:20,844
Excellent choice, my dear.
563
00:36:20,846 --> 00:36:23,580
Sir, would you like lasagna
or beef with cancer sauce?
564
00:36:23,582 --> 00:36:26,483
- I better go for lasagna.
- I think you better, yeah.
565
00:36:27,451 --> 00:36:30,253
Sir, lasagna or sliced
elderly human feet?
566
00:36:30,255 --> 00:36:32,122
- Lasagna.
- Lasagna. Excellent choice.
567
00:36:37,329 --> 00:36:41,264
Stick with me, Nath. You'll gain a mentor,
wingman and all-around fun captain,
568
00:36:41,266 --> 00:36:46,069
and having you around might help ward off
my occasional crushing, empty loneliness.
569
00:36:46,071 --> 00:36:47,704
The crushing,
empty loneliness you ignore?
570
00:36:47,706 --> 00:36:49,773
What crushing,
empty loneliness?
571
00:36:55,580 --> 00:36:56,646
Yeah!
572
00:37:11,562 --> 00:37:12,996
Call me.
573
00:37:12,998 --> 00:37:14,664
I will.
574
00:39:09,847 --> 00:39:11,348
Yeah, yeah.
575
00:39:29,700 --> 00:39:30,800
Whoa!
576
00:39:32,603 --> 00:39:33,703
Oh!
577
00:40:28,359 --> 00:40:30,360
Wow.
578
00:40:30,362 --> 00:40:32,662
Can't believe all that stuff
happened in one day.
579
00:40:32,664 --> 00:40:34,664
That's the life
of the sky, Nathan.
580
00:40:34,666 --> 00:40:38,368
Every day is an incredible
series of fun, memorable events.
581
00:40:38,370 --> 00:40:40,203
A montage, if you will.
582
00:40:40,205 --> 00:40:43,006
- It was amazing.
- I know.
583
00:40:43,008 --> 00:40:45,975
Although I did get strip
searched by a giant angry man.
584
00:40:45,977 --> 00:40:48,178
And severely shocked
with defibrillator paddles.
585
00:40:48,180 --> 00:40:49,746
Yep, best job in the world.
586
00:40:49,748 --> 00:40:51,080
I also drank vomit.
587
00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:31,988
Oh, dear God.
588
00:41:31,990 --> 00:41:34,357
- What? -Uh, I can't let
that woman see me.
589
00:41:34,359 --> 00:41:35,839
- Why?
- Just...
590
00:41:37,661 --> 00:41:39,696
What the... Damn!
591
00:41:39,698 --> 00:41:42,732
I'm not comfortable
with this. Please, Larry...
592
00:41:42,734 --> 00:41:45,034
Yeah, Larry she's gone.
Larry, she's gone!
593
00:41:45,036 --> 00:41:47,837
- Okay. Okay.
- She's gone.
594
00:41:47,839 --> 00:41:49,400
That could've been
really uncomfortable.
595
00:41:49,707 --> 00:41:52,208
Who was that?
596
00:41:52,210 --> 00:41:55,645
Nathan, I've said many times nobody
can ground this plane permanently,
597
00:41:56,547 --> 00:41:58,314
but she came the closest.
598
00:41:58,316 --> 00:42:00,817
The year was 1998.
599
00:42:00,819 --> 00:42:04,387
I was on a weekend layoverin LA and, well, you know,
600
00:42:04,389 --> 00:42:07,891
every great couple has a cute
story about how they met.
601
00:42:08,626 --> 00:42:09,993
We were no different.
602
00:42:13,364 --> 00:42:15,565
She waswalking her dog, Muffin.
603
00:42:15,567 --> 00:42:17,600
The night before,I'd been thrown through
604
00:42:17,602 --> 00:42:20,937
a car windshield at 50 miles
an hour and left for dead.
605
00:42:20,939 --> 00:42:24,807
Boy, that little Muffin sure liked
to lick dried blood off a face.
606
00:42:30,315 --> 00:42:32,582
That charming Aprilconvinced an off-duty,
607
00:42:32,584 --> 00:42:35,485
and possibly drunk, ambulance
driver to pick me up.
608
00:42:35,487 --> 00:42:38,154
And I was glad she did.
609
00:42:38,156 --> 00:42:41,357
You're hot.
You wanna have dinner tonight?
610
00:42:44,896 --> 00:42:46,776
I'll pick you up
at 7:00, all right?
611
00:42:50,267 --> 00:42:53,503
So, I'm all bandaged up, right? I
look her right in the eye and I say,
612
00:42:53,505 --> 00:42:56,039
"God, you're hot. You wanna
have dinner tonight?"
613
00:42:56,041 --> 00:42:58,908
- Um, Larry... -Hello,
storius interruptus much?
614
00:42:58,910 --> 00:43:00,577
- No, but she's...
- Butt cheese?
615
00:43:00,579 --> 00:43:03,579
Really, Nathan? Act your age,
not your weiner length, okay?
616
00:43:03,949 --> 00:43:08,851
We went to one of those restaurants where
they cook everything at the table.
617
00:43:08,853 --> 00:43:13,656
We were given a truly authentic
Japanese experience by chef Hiro Obata
618
00:43:13,658 --> 00:43:15,959
Garcia Gonzalezde San Fernando.
619
00:43:15,961 --> 00:43:17,827
I think it may havebeen his first day.
620
00:43:17,829 --> 00:43:20,330
So, uh, you grew up in LA?
621
00:43:20,332 --> 00:43:22,332
Hmm, well actually
in the suburbs.
622
00:43:23,067 --> 00:43:24,133
Really? Me too.
623
00:43:24,135 --> 00:43:25,201
- Really?
- Mmm-hmm.
624
00:43:25,203 --> 00:43:26,402
- Oh.
- Yeah.
625
00:43:26,404 --> 00:43:29,505
Yeah, I loved it, you know,
everything felt so safe.
626
00:43:29,507 --> 00:43:31,941
You could ride a bike
to a friend's house
627
00:43:31,943 --> 00:43:34,104
without your parents being
all worried about you.
628
00:43:34,812 --> 00:43:36,779
Totally, totally.
629
00:43:36,781 --> 00:43:38,301
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
630
00:43:39,650 --> 00:43:40,717
Yeah.
631
00:43:40,719 --> 00:43:42,051
Mmm-hmm.
632
00:43:45,589 --> 00:43:48,091
So what made you decide
that you wanted to fly?
633
00:43:51,895 --> 00:43:55,732
Well, let's just say I wanted to escape
the pain of a father's abandonment.
634
00:43:55,734 --> 00:43:58,067
I wanted to escape the pain
of a father's abandonment.
635
00:43:58,069 --> 00:44:00,310
Thank you. I didn't think
I could say that by myself.
636
00:44:10,080 --> 00:44:11,147
Hmm.
637
00:44:15,052 --> 00:44:16,119
Huh.
638
00:44:19,189 --> 00:44:20,590
It's crazy.
639
00:44:25,996 --> 00:44:27,697
So, do you believe in fate?
640
00:44:28,098 --> 00:44:30,433
Sure. Do you?
641
00:44:31,535 --> 00:44:33,469
How could I not?
642
00:44:33,471 --> 00:44:36,139
I mean, every day I walk
Muffin down Elm Street,
643
00:44:36,141 --> 00:44:39,609
today I went down Maple,
and there you were,
644
00:44:39,611 --> 00:44:41,444
unconscious on somebody's lawn.
645
00:44:41,446 --> 00:44:42,945
- Hmm.
646
00:44:42,947 --> 00:44:46,082
And usually I take a taxi
back to my hotel room,
647
00:44:46,084 --> 00:44:48,418
but last night, I accepted a
ride from a complete stranger
648
00:44:48,420 --> 00:44:51,387
who reeked of alcohol and could
barely stand up straight.
649
00:44:51,389 --> 00:44:53,389
And if that hadn't happened,
we would've never met.
650
00:44:53,391 --> 00:44:54,991
- I know.
651
00:44:54,993 --> 00:44:58,828
It's like that drunk driver was an
angel, sent down to watch over me.
652
00:44:58,830 --> 00:44:59,896
Yeah.
653
00:45:01,398 --> 00:45:03,833
I love you, drunk driver
who almost killed me.
654
00:45:04,436 --> 00:45:11,040
Now, without exaggeration, I've
made love to roughly 135,000 women.
655
00:45:11,042 --> 00:45:14,203
But there was something about April
that went beyond the physical.
656
00:45:16,146 --> 00:45:18,815
I... Wow.
657
00:45:18,817 --> 00:45:22,151
I just can't believe how
much we have in common.
658
00:45:22,153 --> 00:45:25,955
You know, um, we both are Scorpios,
we both love Japanese food.
659
00:45:25,957 --> 00:45:28,591
We both even have
the same middle name.
660
00:45:28,593 --> 00:45:29,659
I know.
661
00:45:31,128 --> 00:45:34,664
You are amazing,
Larry Elizabeth Gaye.
662
00:45:53,617 --> 00:45:55,852
But despite how wonderfully
everything was going,
663
00:45:55,854 --> 00:45:57,854
something justdidn't feel right.
664
00:46:05,195 --> 00:46:06,896
Do you have to go?
665
00:46:06,898 --> 00:46:08,865
No, I went when I woke up.
666
00:46:10,934 --> 00:46:13,336
So, when you come back
to LA, will I see you?
667
00:46:13,338 --> 00:46:16,439
Look, I, um, the thing is...
668
00:46:19,409 --> 00:46:20,510
Yes.
669
00:46:21,945 --> 00:46:23,746
Yes, you will.
670
00:46:23,748 --> 00:46:25,114
You promise?
671
00:46:25,116 --> 00:46:27,683
I give you my word,
I'll call you.
672
00:46:31,288 --> 00:46:33,189
Well, I didn't call her.
673
00:46:33,191 --> 00:46:37,193
Why not? Nathan, you know me.
I'm built to fly.
674
00:46:37,195 --> 00:46:38,595
And as great as
April was, I just...
675
00:46:38,596 --> 00:46:40,630
I didn't think I could be fully
happy down on the ground.
676
00:46:40,632 --> 00:46:42,398
Then why didn't you have
the guts to say that?
677
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:44,767
Well, because... Turbulence.
678
00:46:45,969 --> 00:46:47,937
April.
679
00:46:47,939 --> 00:46:50,973
Boy, your ears must have been burning,
'cause I was just talking about you.
680
00:46:50,975 --> 00:46:52,175
How have you been?
681
00:46:52,177 --> 00:46:55,778
How have I been? Oh, gosh.
Uh, let's see.
682
00:46:55,780 --> 00:46:57,947
I work at a crappy hotel,
where, um,
683
00:46:57,949 --> 00:47:01,184
I get hit on all day by shitheads who say
they're gonna call and they never do.
684
00:47:01,186 --> 00:47:02,485
How you been?
685
00:47:03,687 --> 00:47:06,956
Great, I've won six
Golden Coffee Pots in a row.
686
00:47:06,958 --> 00:47:09,525
- This is my buddy, Nathan.
- Asshole.
687
00:47:09,527 --> 00:47:12,261
Hey, that's not really fair. You
didn't even give him a chance.
688
00:47:12,263 --> 00:47:13,930
- I think she meant you.
- No.
689
00:47:15,232 --> 00:47:17,733
Really?
April, wait!
690
00:47:21,104 --> 00:47:22,638
I'm sorry.
691
00:47:22,640 --> 00:47:24,874
I'm sorry. I should never
have done what I did.
692
00:47:24,876 --> 00:47:29,145
I guess what I'm trying to say is, what
I should've done is what I didn't.
693
00:47:29,147 --> 00:47:33,883
And what I did do is not the opposite of
what the unright thing to do would've been.
694
00:47:33,885 --> 00:47:36,552
- I understand. Okay.
- Okay, good.
695
00:47:36,554 --> 00:47:40,122
Um, in fact,
why don't you, um...
696
00:47:41,758 --> 00:47:44,193
Why don't you
come over tonight?
697
00:47:44,195 --> 00:47:48,130
We can, um, pick up where we left
of, you know, for old times' sake.
698
00:47:49,433 --> 00:47:55,571
Well, I guess I could drop my landing
gear, if you know what I mean.
699
00:47:55,573 --> 00:48:00,443
Put my tray table into its upright
position, if you know what I mean.
700
00:48:00,445 --> 00:48:03,279
Fit my wheelie bag
into you overhead comp...
701
00:48:03,281 --> 00:48:04,714
I know what you mean.
702
00:48:04,716 --> 00:48:06,282
Okay, so I'll see
you tonight, right?
703
00:48:06,284 --> 00:48:07,984
- Yes, you will.
- Okay.
704
00:48:42,119 --> 00:48:47,456
And this is the team that we have assembled
to fine tune the Flightpal's hard drive.
705
00:48:47,458 --> 00:48:51,227
Johann Kaminsky, Stuart Nevins
and Token Black.
706
00:48:51,862 --> 00:48:54,797
Taequan Black. Taequan Black.
707
00:48:54,799 --> 00:48:57,033
Yes, of course it is.
708
00:48:57,035 --> 00:48:59,802
Now, Mr. Techtronics would
like to see how it's going
709
00:48:59,804 --> 00:49:01,971
with our highest
priority project.
710
00:49:01,973 --> 00:49:03,839
- Uh, fantastic.
- Right on target.
711
00:49:03,841 --> 00:49:06,075
- Couldn't ask for better.
- Well within parameters.
712
00:49:06,077 --> 00:49:07,243
Are you sure?
713
00:49:07,245 --> 00:49:10,012
Well, the technical stuff
will be there,
714
00:49:10,014 --> 00:49:14,350
but there's a certain human instinct
that great flight attendants have,
715
00:49:14,352 --> 00:49:16,953
which we don't
fully understand yet.
716
00:49:16,955 --> 00:49:18,955
I think
I can help you with that.
717
00:49:20,424 --> 00:49:22,024
What?
718
00:49:22,026 --> 00:49:25,027
What's the matter with you boys?
Never seen a sexy woman before?
719
00:49:27,097 --> 00:49:29,332
- No, no.
- No, no. Not for free. No.
720
00:49:29,334 --> 00:49:31,934
Isabella here has done
a little research for us.
721
00:49:33,737 --> 00:49:37,273
Larry, I want to knowthe secrets of being
722
00:49:37,275 --> 00:49:39,875
the best flight attendantin the world.
723
00:49:39,877 --> 00:49:43,079
Wait, you're not gonna somehow
use this against me, are you?
724
00:49:43,081 --> 00:49:45,281
What?No, of course not.
725
00:49:45,283 --> 00:49:48,484
No, I didn't mean to make you
uncomfortable, I just felt I had to ask.
726
00:49:48,486 --> 00:49:51,654
Anyway, all my secrets?Where do I begin?
727
00:49:58,996 --> 00:50:01,564
These tulips
should go in water.
728
00:50:01,566 --> 00:50:05,401
And these two lips should go on a
self-guided tour of Mount April.
729
00:50:05,403 --> 00:50:08,337
Larry, you haven't
changed a bit.
730
00:50:08,339 --> 00:50:13,009
Hey, if it ain't broke, don't
un-break it, if you know what I mean.
731
00:50:13,011 --> 00:50:14,877
- I don't. Um...
- Okay.
732
00:50:14,879 --> 00:50:18,080
Uh, Larry there is someone
I'd like you to meet.
733
00:50:18,082 --> 00:50:21,484
- Mmm.
- So, um, just wait here.
734
00:50:21,486 --> 00:50:23,886
- That's exactly what I'm gonna do.
- Okay.
735
00:50:25,489 --> 00:50:26,889
Three-way.
736
00:50:32,963 --> 00:50:35,698
Huh, that's a different
way to go.
737
00:50:37,901 --> 00:50:39,502
- Larry.
- Oh.
738
00:50:40,303 --> 00:50:41,470
This is Donnie.
739
00:50:42,406 --> 00:50:44,540
- What's up, man?
- He's your son.
740
00:50:44,542 --> 00:50:46,776
He's my what? Eh...
741
00:50:47,444 --> 00:50:48,744
Whoa.
742
00:50:48,746 --> 00:50:51,313
- May I have a word with you?
- Yeah.
743
00:50:54,518 --> 00:50:57,253
This can't be.
We only did it once.
744
00:50:57,821 --> 00:50:59,655
That was all it took.
745
00:50:59,657 --> 00:51:01,457
That's what I'm talking about.
746
00:51:02,159 --> 00:51:04,360
But how can you be sure
he's mine?
747
00:51:07,664 --> 00:51:08,898
Turbulence.
748
00:51:16,606 --> 00:51:18,841
Hey, Donnie.
749
00:51:23,413 --> 00:51:25,114
Would you like some more?
750
00:51:25,116 --> 00:51:26,315
Don't mind if I do.
751
00:51:27,084 --> 00:51:28,217
Okay.
752
00:51:28,885 --> 00:51:30,786
Hmm. Mmm. No, no.
753
00:51:30,788 --> 00:51:32,088
Oh, okay.
754
00:51:54,111 --> 00:51:55,344
Oh, okay.
755
00:51:56,580 --> 00:51:57,847
Mmm.
756
00:51:57,849 --> 00:52:01,383
Oh, uh, convenient.
757
00:52:01,385 --> 00:52:03,612
Yeah, well, I don't have
a lot of time to cook.
758
00:52:03,638 --> 00:52:04,587
I'm a single mother.
759
00:52:04,589 --> 00:52:05,721
As you know.
760
00:52:05,723 --> 00:52:07,490
Yeah, that's gotta be rough.
761
00:52:09,126 --> 00:52:12,695
So, Donnie, how's school? Uh, What...
What grade are you in?
762
00:52:14,798 --> 00:52:17,266
First? Wow, you gotta be one of the
bigger kids in the class, huh?
763
00:52:17,268 --> 00:52:19,468
No, Donnie, don't
disrespect your father.
764
00:52:19,470 --> 00:52:20,769
He's not my father.
765
00:52:20,771 --> 00:52:22,471
Aha! The plot thickens.
766
00:52:22,473 --> 00:52:25,941
No, he means he doesn't
accept you as a father.
767
00:52:26,943 --> 00:52:28,611
Oh. I see.
768
00:52:30,113 --> 00:52:33,649
Okay, look, Donnie. I don't blame
you for feeling angry towards me.
769
00:52:33,651 --> 00:52:36,685
If you don't want me to be a
part of your life, I understand.
770
00:52:37,220 --> 00:52:38,320
Good.
771
00:52:40,557 --> 00:52:42,158
It's just as well.
772
00:52:42,160 --> 00:52:45,094
Flying the LA to Chicago route
first thing in the morning anyway.
773
00:52:45,096 --> 00:52:47,596
I'm... I'm sorry again.
774
00:52:47,598 --> 00:52:49,965
- About... About everything.
- Mmm-hmm.
775
00:52:51,635 --> 00:52:52,801
Wait.
776
00:52:53,737 --> 00:52:55,604
Dad, are you a pilot?
777
00:52:57,207 --> 00:53:01,944
Wait, um, your mother didn't
tell you what I do for a living?
778
00:53:01,946 --> 00:53:04,146
She's never told me
anything about you.
779
00:53:04,148 --> 00:53:07,183
I've always dreamed of having
a dad who was a pilot.
780
00:53:07,185 --> 00:53:10,219
Son, that look of wide-eyed adoration on
your face makes it hard for me to admit
781
00:53:10,221 --> 00:53:12,755
- that I'm only a fly...
- Please say pilot.
782
00:53:12,757 --> 00:53:16,325
Ing man. Meaning pilot.
I'm a pilot. I'm a pilot.
783
00:53:16,327 --> 00:53:19,828
That is so cool. That's what
I wanna be when I grow up.
784
00:53:19,830 --> 00:53:21,931
Tell me everything about it.
Every single detail.
785
00:53:21,933 --> 00:53:23,799
Son, there is nothing
like the feeling
786
00:53:23,801 --> 00:53:26,335
of guiding that bird
up to 36,000 feet.
787
00:53:26,337 --> 00:53:27,970
Someday you'll come up with me.
788
00:53:27,972 --> 00:53:32,141
Okay. Why don't you two keep talking,
I'm gonna get dessert ready, okay?
789
00:53:32,143 --> 00:53:33,442
Okay.
790
00:53:36,413 --> 00:53:38,647
Wow, there's just so much
I didn't know.
791
00:53:38,649 --> 00:53:40,583
Well, now you do.
792
00:53:41,751 --> 00:53:42,985
Any questions?
793
00:53:42,987 --> 00:53:47,089
Yeah, uh, can you still do it
if there's only one girl?
794
00:53:47,091 --> 00:53:49,158
Good question, Son.
795
00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:52,861
And the answer,
believe it or not, is yes.
796
00:53:52,863 --> 00:53:54,330
I mean, she won't always
have a hot roommate
797
00:53:54,332 --> 00:53:56,565
or a college friend
visiting from out of town.
798
00:53:56,567 --> 00:53:59,034
On those occasions,
you have to make it work.
799
00:53:59,036 --> 00:54:01,237
And where can I get
one of these swings?
800
00:54:01,239 --> 00:54:04,607
There are catalogs. Online sex shops.
I had mine custom made in Bangkok.
801
00:54:04,609 --> 00:54:08,744
But remember, install it properly.
And test it out.
802
00:54:08,746 --> 00:54:10,746
Because you
always wanna have...
803
00:54:11,648 --> 00:54:12,948
Safe sex.
804
00:54:12,950 --> 00:54:16,418
Atta boy. That's my boy.
Anything else?
805
00:54:16,420 --> 00:54:18,153
Yeah, just one thing.
806
00:54:18,155 --> 00:54:23,826
Should you still do it if you and
the girl are, like, in love?
807
00:54:23,828 --> 00:54:27,029
Hmm. I'm gonna have
to say no on that one, Son.
808
00:54:27,031 --> 00:54:29,765
There can be a lot
of strings attached.
809
00:54:29,767 --> 00:54:33,902
But you know what? You're only 13.
You have so much to learn.
810
00:54:33,904 --> 00:54:35,804
I just... I wanted you
to have the basics.
811
00:54:35,806 --> 00:54:37,339
Thanks, Dad.
I really appreciate it.
812
00:54:37,341 --> 00:54:39,008
Hey, you got it.
813
00:54:39,010 --> 00:54:42,911
Now bring it in here.
Huh? All right. That's my boy.
814
00:54:47,918 --> 00:54:49,318
Oh.
815
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,353
Hey, what are you guys
doing in here?
816
00:54:51,355 --> 00:54:53,722
Uh, just a little
father-son bondage.
817
00:54:55,358 --> 00:54:59,361
Okay. Uh, Donnie, I'm afraid that
it's time for you to go to bed.
818
00:54:59,363 --> 00:55:01,563
- Aww.
- Can Dad stay over?
819
00:55:03,433 --> 00:55:06,201
- If you like, yeah, he can stay.
- Sweet.
820
00:55:06,203 --> 00:55:09,471
The living room? I mean, what
if the kid walks in on us?
821
00:55:10,940 --> 00:55:13,208
Hmm, I don't know.
822
00:55:22,419 --> 00:55:24,420
Oh, um, don't forget
to lock that.
823
00:55:24,422 --> 00:55:26,902
It's broken, it tends to release.
So if you...
824
00:55:27,357 --> 00:55:29,224
Yeah, I think I got it.
825
00:55:33,997 --> 00:55:38,400
So, how come you never tried to
find me and tell me about Donnie?
826
00:55:39,569 --> 00:55:43,205
Um, well, because I was...
I was really angry.
827
00:55:43,973 --> 00:55:46,909
Angry at you for leaving,
828
00:55:46,911 --> 00:55:50,546
and I didn't think you deserved
a son as great as Donnie,
829
00:55:50,548 --> 00:55:52,081
and I don't know, I guess
when I saw you at the pool,
830
00:55:52,083 --> 00:55:54,883
I thought maybe
the time had come.
831
00:55:54,885 --> 00:55:59,021
Well, April,
I wanna do my part.
832
00:55:59,023 --> 00:56:02,057
From now on, I'll give you
half my salary for him.
833
00:56:02,059 --> 00:56:05,260
Well, I'll give you 25%
of my salary for him.
834
00:56:05,262 --> 00:56:08,897
And on his birthday, well, I'll pick
him out something from the sky mall.
835
00:56:08,899 --> 00:56:11,667
A sleep mask, a neck pillow.
836
00:56:11,669 --> 00:56:13,402
Perhaps some nice
compression leg sleeves,
837
00:56:13,404 --> 00:56:15,838
ideal for improved
circulation on longer flights.
838
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:18,774
Okay, I think what he'd really like
to have is a father in the picture.
839
00:56:18,776 --> 00:56:23,312
I know. You've got to get out there and
start dating while you're still hot.
840
00:56:23,314 --> 00:56:24,446
I meant you.
841
00:56:25,148 --> 00:56:26,215
Oh.
842
00:56:27,717 --> 00:56:31,320
Look, I... I know
that it's a lot to ask,
843
00:56:31,322 --> 00:56:36,859
but if you, I don't know, if you ever stop
flying and settle in the area, you...
844
00:56:36,861 --> 00:56:39,128
You could really be
a big part of his life.
845
00:56:39,130 --> 00:56:41,296
Yeah, but how would
I even earn a living?
846
00:56:41,298 --> 00:56:44,400
I mean, sure, I could open a
studio and teach the Macarena,
847
00:56:44,402 --> 00:56:47,002
but that craze isn't
gonna last forever.
848
00:56:47,004 --> 00:56:48,871
April, let's face it.
849
00:56:48,873 --> 00:56:52,875
If you couldn't keep me on the
ground, well, nothing could.
850
00:56:54,177 --> 00:56:56,612
Okay, well,
just think about it.
851
00:56:57,614 --> 00:56:58,680
Okay.
852
00:57:05,522 --> 00:57:06,688
Oh, not right now?
853
00:57:08,658 --> 00:57:09,958
Just think about it.
854
00:57:09,960 --> 00:57:12,428
Better yet,
I'll think about it.
855
00:57:12,430 --> 00:57:13,695
- Okay.
- Okay.
856
00:57:13,697 --> 00:57:15,664
Good night, Larry.
857
00:57:15,666 --> 00:57:18,534
Hey, uh, maybe
we could have sex.
858
00:57:19,335 --> 00:57:21,437
If you know what I mean.
859
00:57:21,439 --> 00:57:24,306
Okay, if you say the actual thing,
then you don't need to say,
860
00:57:24,308 --> 00:57:26,108
"If you know what I mean."
861
00:57:26,110 --> 00:57:27,609
Is that a yes?
862
00:57:27,611 --> 00:57:28,844
That's a no.
863
00:57:28,846 --> 00:57:29,945
- Got it.
- Okay.
864
00:57:29,947 --> 00:57:31,213
All right.
865
00:57:52,135 --> 00:57:53,302
Oh.
866
00:57:59,509 --> 00:58:01,076
I said no, Larry.
867
00:58:02,378 --> 00:58:03,445
Oh.
868
00:58:09,786 --> 00:58:11,220
Morning, Son.
869
00:58:11,222 --> 00:58:15,557
Morning, woman with whom passionate
unprotected fling resulted in son.
870
00:58:16,292 --> 00:58:17,693
Morning.
871
00:58:17,695 --> 00:58:19,194
Where's your hat, Dad?
872
00:58:19,196 --> 00:58:22,598
- What hat?
- Your pilot's hat.
873
00:58:22,600 --> 00:58:27,402
Oh, right. I don't like to wear it
when I'm not flying. Too pilot-y.
874
00:58:27,404 --> 00:58:30,138
Which I am, of course.
Pilot. I'm a pilot.
875
00:58:30,140 --> 00:58:32,674
Wait, why is your tie
tucked into your shirt?
876
00:58:32,676 --> 00:58:35,711
I thought only loser
stewardesses did that.
877
00:58:35,713 --> 00:58:36,778
Flight attendants.
878
00:58:38,548 --> 00:58:42,384
Is what those losers
prefer to be called,
879
00:58:42,386 --> 00:58:45,554
and this tie-tuck is my way
of mocking them.
880
00:58:45,556 --> 00:58:48,090
Losers. Come on,
I'll walk you to school.
881
00:58:48,092 --> 00:58:49,858
Oh, actually, I ride a bike.
882
00:58:49,860 --> 00:58:51,226
Not a problem.
883
00:58:55,164 --> 00:58:58,333
Hey, Dad. When I grow up, can
I be a pilot just like you?
884
00:58:58,335 --> 00:59:01,069
Of course you can. You can
be anything you want, Son.
885
00:59:01,071 --> 00:59:04,473
Just follow your dreams
and go wherever they take you.
886
00:59:04,475 --> 00:59:08,443
The good ones, not the weird ones,
like when you're naked at a funeral.
887
00:59:08,445 --> 00:59:09,945
Or naked at a petting zoo.
888
00:59:09,947 --> 00:59:11,947
I got it. Thanks, Dad.
889
00:59:11,949 --> 00:59:13,048
You got it, Son.
890
00:59:17,086 --> 00:59:18,453
Let me get that for you, Son.
891
00:59:18,455 --> 00:59:20,689
- Thanks, Dad.
- Sure. Straight in there.
892
00:59:20,691 --> 00:59:23,058
Hey, look.
It's Donnie Girlparts.
893
00:59:23,060 --> 00:59:25,260
How's your vagina
today, Donnie?
894
00:59:25,262 --> 00:59:26,495
Son, you have a vagina?
895
00:59:26,497 --> 00:59:28,330
God, the surprises
just keep coming.
896
00:59:28,332 --> 00:59:31,266
No, Dad. They pick on me
'cause they think I'm a wuss.
897
00:59:31,268 --> 00:59:33,068
It's no big deal, okay?
898
00:59:33,070 --> 00:59:34,870
I beg to differ.
899
00:59:34,872 --> 00:59:36,872
Hey, you.
900
00:59:36,874 --> 00:59:39,374
This young man here,
he's a Gaye.
901
00:59:39,376 --> 00:59:41,743
And when you mess with a Gaye,
902
00:59:41,745 --> 00:59:43,812
you mess with Gayes everywhere.
903
00:59:43,814 --> 00:59:46,748
And some of us Gayes have a vicious temper.
You feel me?
904
00:59:46,750 --> 00:59:48,216
You feel me on that?
905
00:59:49,652 --> 00:59:50,719
Scram!
906
00:59:54,625 --> 00:59:55,691
Thanks, Dad.
907
00:59:55,693 --> 00:59:58,093
Hey, it's what dads do.
908
00:59:59,362 --> 01:00:03,398
So, are you gonna be, like,
staying with us from now on?
909
01:00:04,801 --> 01:00:06,602
Well, actually, Son, I...
910
01:00:08,004 --> 01:00:10,439
I... I will.
911
01:00:11,007 --> 01:00:12,674
Of course I will.
912
01:00:12,676 --> 01:00:15,477
What, do you think I'm just gonna
abandon you like my own father did?
913
01:00:15,479 --> 01:00:17,679
That I'm gonna choose
an empty, transient existence
914
01:00:17,681 --> 01:00:20,716
over a meaningful life
with a family that loves me?
915
01:00:20,718 --> 01:00:23,285
What do you got for a guy who chose
an empty transient existence
916
01:00:23,287 --> 01:00:27,623
- over a meaningful life with a
family that loves him? -Scotch?
917
01:00:27,625 --> 01:00:30,826
- No, I'm American.
- Sorry, you look Scotch.
918
01:00:35,898 --> 01:00:39,668
- You're Gaye, right?
- Yeah.
919
01:00:39,670 --> 01:00:42,904
Thought so.
You remind me of your dad.
920
01:00:46,943 --> 01:00:48,443
Ugh!
921
01:01:07,463 --> 01:01:12,134
Well, Cecile it looks like your
award-winning flight attendant
922
01:01:12,136 --> 01:01:15,837
- is 30 minutes late. -That's
the type of human error
923
01:01:15,839 --> 01:01:19,441
that you never have to worry
about with the Flightpal.
924
01:01:19,443 --> 01:01:22,744
- Wait, wait, wait, wait. Larry's
coming, I know he is. -Uh-huh.
925
01:01:22,746 --> 01:01:24,413
Well, he's about
30 minutes late.
926
01:01:24,415 --> 01:01:26,214
- Well, maybe he's stuck in
traffic, I don't know. -Really?
927
01:01:26,216 --> 01:01:29,251
- I don't think he's ever gonna show up.
- Trust me, he's a hero.
928
01:01:29,253 --> 01:01:31,386
- Mmm-hmm. -He's gonna
save all of our jobs.
929
01:01:31,388 --> 01:01:34,990
- I ran out on
my own son, everyone.
930
01:01:34,992 --> 01:01:40,228
Yes, I did. Just like
my own father ran out on me.
931
01:01:40,230 --> 01:01:45,767
The sins of the fathers laid
on the children of the corn.
932
01:01:45,769 --> 01:01:48,937
'Cause I had a chance to stop the
cycle of abandonment. Did I? Did I?
933
01:01:49,706 --> 01:01:51,139
Larry!
934
01:01:51,141 --> 01:01:52,661
- No, it's Jack.
- Larry.
935
01:01:53,543 --> 01:01:55,944
Oh, boy, this isn't optimal.
936
01:01:57,146 --> 01:02:00,415
- Okay, all right, listen to me.
- Okay.
937
01:02:00,417 --> 01:02:01,616
- Okay?
- Okay.
938
01:02:01,618 --> 01:02:03,652
I want you to take
all this shame, okay,
939
01:02:03,654 --> 01:02:05,821
all this pain
that you're feeling right now,
940
01:02:05,823 --> 01:02:08,056
and let's use it,
let's channel it.
941
01:02:08,491 --> 01:02:09,758
Let's focus it.
942
01:02:11,427 --> 01:02:14,296
Thank you, Nathan.
I needed that.
943
01:02:19,402 --> 01:02:20,769
Phew!
944
01:02:21,604 --> 01:02:22,838
My God, you're hot.
945
01:02:24,273 --> 01:02:26,675
Look, I've got a full-on
dinosaur bone in my pants,
946
01:02:26,677 --> 01:02:28,478
and it's not going away
any time soon.
947
01:02:30,346 --> 01:02:33,115
Yeah, let's do this.
948
01:02:39,856 --> 01:02:41,356
Attendants ready.
949
01:02:42,258 --> 01:02:44,459
- And go!
950
01:02:49,265 --> 01:02:50,599
And brew!
951
01:03:33,910 --> 01:03:35,143
Good.
952
01:03:55,364 --> 01:03:56,531
Oh!
953
01:03:56,533 --> 01:03:58,733
Ow!
954
01:04:10,914 --> 01:04:12,247
Here we go,
are you ready for this?
955
01:04:12,249 --> 01:04:13,849
- Yeah! -All right, she's
just a sexy robot.
956
01:04:13,851 --> 01:04:16,117
Just a sexy robot.
You're Larry Gaye.
957
01:04:16,119 --> 01:04:18,854
Go! Go get her.
958
01:04:21,724 --> 01:04:23,225
What does this test measure?
959
01:04:23,227 --> 01:04:25,627
We just thought it'd be fun
to watch.
960
01:04:25,629 --> 01:04:26,862
- Okay.
961
01:04:50,720 --> 01:04:51,920
Move!
962
01:04:51,922 --> 01:04:53,121
Oh!
963
01:05:05,902 --> 01:05:08,236
Nathan!
964
01:05:08,238 --> 01:05:11,640
- Nathan!
- Right here.
965
01:05:11,642 --> 01:05:15,343
Nathan, Nathan,
I've done it, Nathan.
966
01:05:16,112 --> 01:05:19,080
- I've done it.
- No, you didn't.
967
01:05:20,516 --> 01:05:22,196
- I didn't?
- You didn't.
968
01:05:22,652 --> 01:05:24,152
- Oh.
- It was ugly.
969
01:05:24,387 --> 01:05:25,587
Oh.
970
01:05:28,591 --> 01:05:32,861
- Okay, Nate, so how am I doing?
- All right, I've got you down
971
01:05:32,863 --> 01:05:36,765
30 points to none.
972
01:05:36,767 --> 01:05:40,068
- With one event left. -Huh. I
felt it was closer than that.
973
01:05:40,070 --> 01:05:43,171
- It's not. -Well, how can I
possibly make up 30 points?
974
01:05:43,173 --> 01:05:45,173
Because customer serviceis so important,
975
01:05:45,175 --> 01:05:47,242
this final eventis worth 31 points.
976
01:05:47,244 --> 01:05:48,543
- Hmm.
- Wow, that's convenient.
977
01:05:48,545 --> 01:05:53,248
We're going to present a customer service
problem and see who can best solve it.
978
01:05:53,250 --> 01:05:55,550
It's dinner timewe have two entrees,
979
01:05:55,552 --> 01:05:58,253
barbeque chickenand pasta primavera.
980
01:05:58,255 --> 01:06:00,722
The problem is,you're all out of pasta.
981
01:06:02,558 --> 01:06:05,193
Good evening, folks,
for dinner we have
982
01:06:05,195 --> 01:06:08,730
barbeque chicken
or stewed muskrat testicles.
983
01:06:08,732 --> 01:06:10,966
- I'll have the chicken.
- Of course you will.
984
01:06:12,368 --> 01:06:15,670
I have barbeque chicken
or vomit encrusted rat legs.
985
01:06:15,672 --> 01:06:18,106
Barbeque chicken.
- Now, that's programing.
986
01:06:19,709 --> 01:06:22,510
Uh, barbeque chicken or the
987
01:06:22,512 --> 01:06:27,749
sauteed anus of a skunk served on a
bed of the anuses of other skunks.
988
01:06:27,751 --> 01:06:29,517
I'll take the chicken.
989
01:06:29,519 --> 01:06:33,555
Barbeque chicken or toe nail fungus in a
broth of hobo saliva and crotch sweat.
990
01:06:33,557 --> 01:06:37,425
Barbeque chicken or, uh,
bubonic plague
991
01:06:37,427 --> 01:06:40,395
garnished with pigeon droppings
and the hand-fluffed pubes
992
01:06:40,397 --> 01:06:43,765
of a fat, old eczema sufferer
who just ran a 10k.
993
01:06:43,767 --> 01:06:45,300
Chicken sounds good.
- Yeah.
994
01:06:45,302 --> 01:06:48,203
Barbeque chicken or
dingleberry-crusted rat tartar
995
01:06:48,205 --> 01:06:52,440
drizzled with pus, served with a
warm mug of curdled liposuction fat.
996
01:06:52,442 --> 01:06:53,842
Chicken, please.
- Um...
997
01:06:53,844 --> 01:06:57,879
Barbeque chicken or...
Or, um...
998
01:06:57,881 --> 01:07:02,384
- Or lobster. I...
- Oh, I'll have the lobster.
999
01:07:02,386 --> 01:07:05,387
Yeah, fuck chicken, I want the lobster too.
- I don't have lobster.
1000
01:07:05,389 --> 01:07:07,605
I only have barbeque chicken.
I couldn't think
1001
01:07:07,631 --> 01:07:09,491
of anything else disgusting.
I give up.
1002
01:07:09,493 --> 01:07:11,259
Larry Gaye gives up.
1003
01:07:15,765 --> 01:07:17,265
I am amazed.
1004
01:07:18,768 --> 01:07:20,969
I am amazed.
1005
01:07:20,971 --> 01:07:24,172
The winner, by a scoreof 61 points to zero,
1006
01:07:24,174 --> 01:07:27,208
-is Sally the Flightpal.
1007
01:07:34,483 --> 01:07:35,884
Ugh!
1008
01:07:37,553 --> 01:07:40,355
I don't know how you lost.
You were down by 30 points.
1009
01:07:40,357 --> 01:07:43,291
But when they said the last event was
for 31, I thought for sure you'd win.
1010
01:07:43,293 --> 01:07:46,261
Nah, things like that only
happen in the movies, Nathan.
1011
01:07:46,263 --> 01:07:47,896
This is real life.
1012
01:07:47,898 --> 01:07:49,697
But how did she know how to
do that with the arm tray?
1013
01:07:49,699 --> 01:07:52,267
I mean, it's like she knew
my every move. But how?
1014
01:07:53,202 --> 01:07:54,502
Isabella.
1015
01:07:56,939 --> 01:08:00,508
The woman who seduced me and with
whom I shared all my secrets,
1016
01:08:00,510 --> 01:08:02,977
and then never heard
from again.
1017
01:08:02,979 --> 01:08:06,681
You came to support me. I'm truly
touched, that is so sweet.
1018
01:08:06,683 --> 01:08:08,016
I don't think that's
what happened, Lar.
1019
01:08:08,018 --> 01:08:10,318
I think she plied you
for information
1020
01:08:10,320 --> 01:08:12,754
- and used it against you.
- -Oh.
1021
01:08:12,756 --> 01:08:15,623
Pardon my sidekick,
he's embarrassingly naive.
1022
01:08:15,625 --> 01:08:19,260
- How have you been? -Oh, no,
he's right, Larry. I'm sorry.
1023
01:08:19,262 --> 01:08:22,597
You deceiving tramp. I never
wanna see your lying face again.
1024
01:08:22,599 --> 01:08:27,335
My God, you are so hot! Any
chance you're free for dinner?
1025
01:08:27,337 --> 01:08:31,139
- No.
- Lunch, tomorrow? Breakfast?
1026
01:08:31,141 --> 01:08:33,141
God! I'm such an idiot!
1027
01:08:34,310 --> 01:08:36,878
I've ruined flight attending
for everyone.
1028
01:08:36,880 --> 01:08:39,581
Everyone! Everyone!
1029
01:08:51,994 --> 01:08:54,295
You can be anything you want, Son.
Just follow your dreams
1030
01:08:54,297 --> 01:08:56,865
and go wherever they take you.
1031
01:08:56,867 --> 01:08:59,601
- Federated Airlines.
1032
01:08:59,603 --> 01:09:04,839
Hi, this is Larry Gaye. I seem to
have forgotten my next assignment.
1033
01:09:04,841 --> 01:09:06,641
Could you tell me
where my next flight is?
1034
01:09:06,643 --> 01:09:08,510
Oh, hi, Larry, it's Cristal.
1035
01:09:08,512 --> 01:09:12,347
You've got Flight 37 to Buenos Aires,
leaves San Fran tonight at 10:00.
1036
01:09:12,349 --> 01:09:16,451
- Thank you. -Hey, Larry,
what are you wearing?
1037
01:09:16,453 --> 01:09:20,188
- Jeans and a hoodie from GAP kids.
- Okay.
1038
01:09:34,303 --> 01:09:36,504
- Okay, have a nice flight.
- Mmm-hmm.
1039
01:09:37,873 --> 01:09:41,009
- May I help you? -Hi, can I
get a ticket from Los Angeles
1040
01:09:41,011 --> 01:09:43,444
to San Francisco, and continuing
on from San Francisco
1041
01:09:43,446 --> 01:09:45,146
to Buenos Aires, please?
1042
01:09:45,148 --> 01:09:48,249
Sorry, I'm not allowed to sell
tickets to unaccompanied minors.
1043
01:09:54,557 --> 01:09:58,459
I'd like a ticket from Los Angeles to
San Francisco, then on to Buenos Aires.
1044
01:09:58,461 --> 01:10:02,063
Sorry, I'm not allowed to sell
tickets to unaccompanied miners.
1045
01:10:02,065 --> 01:10:05,466
Oh, no,
actually we're together. So...
1046
01:10:06,001 --> 01:10:07,802
Oh, perfect!
1047
01:10:24,587 --> 01:10:27,922
Jeez. What happened? Who
brought herpes to the orgy?
1048
01:10:27,924 --> 01:10:29,390
Larry, look.
1049
01:10:33,162 --> 01:10:35,930
- She has herpes? Thanks
for the heads-up. -No!
1050
01:10:35,932 --> 01:10:39,300
That's the Flightpal. They say
within a year, we'll all be gone.
1051
01:10:39,302 --> 01:10:42,136
- It's devastating. -You say
that like it's my fault.
1052
01:10:42,138 --> 01:10:46,507
As if I lost some sort of flight
attending contest to save our jobs.
1053
01:10:46,509 --> 01:10:48,610
You did.
That's exactly what happened.
1054
01:10:48,612 --> 01:10:51,613
- Disagree not to agree.
- You're just combining words.
1055
01:10:51,615 --> 01:10:52,981
Correctly.
1056
01:11:02,558 --> 01:11:06,261
- Sir, can I get you a drink?
- Bourbon, rocks.
1057
01:11:06,263 --> 01:11:09,197
It sure does, but I'm afraid I
can't serve alcohol to miners.
1058
01:11:11,467 --> 01:11:13,768
- Sparkling water.
- Very well.
1059
01:11:16,905 --> 01:11:20,108
- Sir, can I get you a... Son?
- Dad!
1060
01:11:21,644 --> 01:11:23,144
What are you doing here?
1061
01:11:23,146 --> 01:11:26,114
Well, I took your advice. You
told me to follow my dreams,
1062
01:11:26,116 --> 01:11:28,616
and my dreams are to fly
and be with you.
1063
01:11:29,618 --> 01:11:31,152
Donnie, I can't
be a part of this.
1064
01:11:31,154 --> 01:11:32,553
I mean, your mother's
probably worried sick.
1065
01:11:32,555 --> 01:11:35,456
You get off this plane
and go home, this minute.
1066
01:11:35,458 --> 01:11:37,625
- We're at 32,000 feet.
- Right.
1067
01:11:37,627 --> 01:11:39,927
Whatever you do,
do not get off this plane,
1068
01:11:39,929 --> 01:11:43,398
but we're gonna talk more about
this when we get to Buenos Aires.
1069
01:11:44,199 --> 01:11:45,300
Hey, Dad?
1070
01:11:46,769 --> 01:11:48,670
What are you doing back here
serving drinks?
1071
01:11:48,672 --> 01:11:51,172
Aren't you supposed to be
up front in the cockpit?
1072
01:11:53,143 --> 01:11:56,144
And that's how you serve
a drink,
1073
01:11:56,146 --> 01:11:58,479
you lowly, wussified
flight attendant.
1074
01:11:58,481 --> 01:12:00,815
God! Don't make me come
back here and show you again.
1075
01:12:00,817 --> 01:12:03,885
- I'm way too busy flying the plane.
- But, Larry...
1076
01:12:03,887 --> 01:12:07,155
Larry? Who's Larry? I'm not Larry.
It's Captain Gaye to you.
1077
01:12:07,157 --> 01:12:10,425
Hey! That's my nickname.
1078
01:12:10,427 --> 01:12:14,595
Huh. Okay.
I've gotta get back to work.
1079
01:12:14,597 --> 01:12:18,833
In the cockpit, of course. Which
is where I belong, being a pilot.
1080
01:12:18,835 --> 01:12:20,001
I'm a pilot.
1081
01:12:33,349 --> 01:12:35,216
- Look who it is.
1082
01:12:37,152 --> 01:12:38,993
What are you doing
up here, Gaye?
1083
01:12:40,489 --> 01:12:43,825
My son is on board and he
doesn't know I'm only a...
1084
01:12:43,827 --> 01:12:45,526
- Flying waitress?
- Sissy man?
1085
01:12:46,028 --> 01:12:47,495
Ass pansy?
1086
01:12:48,497 --> 01:12:50,698
Come on, guys.
Give me a break, okay?
1087
01:12:50,700 --> 01:12:53,901
Just let me stay up here for a
while so he doesn't find out.
1088
01:12:53,903 --> 01:12:56,904
Can't help you, Gaye.
It's against regulations.
1089
01:13:06,482 --> 01:13:09,617
Hey, why is our fuel level
dropping precipitously?
1090
01:13:11,053 --> 01:13:12,487
I don't know.
1091
01:13:19,228 --> 01:13:20,628
Good night.
1092
01:13:25,501 --> 01:13:26,768
Donnie?
1093
01:13:36,912 --> 01:13:40,415
Dear Mom, sorry to sneak out,
but I had to go find Dad.
1094
01:13:40,417 --> 01:13:42,383
I rigged the CD recordingto start playing
1095
01:13:42,385 --> 01:13:44,519
when you picked upthat blank piece of paper.
1096
01:13:44,521 --> 01:13:45,987
Hope it all worked.
1097
01:13:46,755 --> 01:13:48,189
Oh, my God.
1098
01:13:56,198 --> 01:13:59,600
Uh, Lar? We were supposed to start
dinner service an hour ago.
1099
01:13:59,602 --> 01:14:02,069
Hey, I think we can
wait a while.
1100
01:14:02,071 --> 01:14:05,506
Larry, you can't avoid facing the
truth with your son forever.
1101
01:14:05,508 --> 01:14:08,309
He'll accept you
whether you're a pilot
1102
01:14:08,311 --> 01:14:10,978
- or a flight attendant. -That's
really great advice, Nate.
1103
01:14:10,980 --> 01:14:14,749
Sally, would you mind covering dinner
in coach for me with Nathan here?
1104
01:14:14,751 --> 01:14:18,119
I'm just... I'm trying to avoid being seen.
It's a long story.
1105
01:14:18,121 --> 01:14:19,353
But I was assigned
to first class.
1106
01:14:19,355 --> 01:14:22,924
- Come on, have a heart.
- But I don't have a heart.
1107
01:14:22,926 --> 01:14:25,593
- Do you have to take
everything so literally? -Yes.
1108
01:14:31,333 --> 01:14:33,134
- Fine. Fine.
- Dinner?
1109
01:14:36,506 --> 01:14:38,139
Must be a break
in one of the lines.
1110
01:14:38,141 --> 01:14:41,108
According to this,
we're losing fuel like crazy.
1111
01:14:41,110 --> 01:14:43,978
This is Federated Flight 37,
we've got a situation.
1112
01:14:44,880 --> 01:14:46,614
Chicken and rice, please.
1113
01:14:49,718 --> 01:14:53,488
Uh, ma'am, we have baked ziti
and chicken with wild rice.
1114
01:14:53,490 --> 01:14:55,490
Chicken and rice, please. -Dad?
1115
01:14:57,860 --> 01:15:00,161
- Oh.
- Dad, are you really a pilot?
1116
01:15:00,163 --> 01:15:03,364
Yeah, I'm just helping out while
the plane's on autopilot.
1117
01:15:03,366 --> 01:15:06,100
- Folks, we've justswitched off autopilot,
1118
01:15:06,102 --> 01:15:08,536
we're expectingsome possible turbulence.
1119
01:15:08,538 --> 01:15:11,973
Oh, that's Felder, my co-pilot,
and I am his captain.
1120
01:15:11,975 --> 01:15:14,242
Uh...This is Captain Bryce,
1121
01:15:14,244 --> 01:15:15,843
just want to let you knowyou're in good hands
1122
01:15:15,845 --> 01:15:17,912
with me and my co-pilot,Felder, up here.
1123
01:15:17,914 --> 01:15:20,181
It's the two of us flyingthis plane,
1124
01:15:20,183 --> 01:15:23,384
definitely no one elsein the cockpit.
1125
01:15:25,721 --> 01:15:26,888
Dad?
1126
01:15:27,789 --> 01:15:29,924
Oh, Son,
you're too smart for me.
1127
01:15:29,926 --> 01:15:31,392
I'm...
1128
01:15:32,327 --> 01:15:34,161
I'm a...
1129
01:15:34,163 --> 01:15:35,496
I'm a flight attendant.
1130
01:15:37,332 --> 01:15:39,700
Why did you lie to me?
1131
01:15:39,702 --> 01:15:43,905
I just felt that if you knew, you'd
judge me or think less of me.
1132
01:15:43,907 --> 01:15:45,273
I guess it was just
my own insecurity.
1133
01:15:45,275 --> 01:15:46,541
I should have
given you more credit.
1134
01:15:46,543 --> 01:15:48,442
You pussy! You're pathetic!
1135
01:15:48,444 --> 01:15:51,812
Okay, my dad's a waitress
with wings. A sissy man.
1136
01:15:51,814 --> 01:15:54,148
Don't forget ass pansy.
1137
01:16:05,260 --> 01:16:07,328
Uh...
1138
01:16:07,931 --> 01:16:11,660
At this time, we'd like
to ask flight attendant
1139
01:16:11,686 --> 01:16:14,535
Larry Gaye to report
to the cockpit.
1140
01:16:14,537 --> 01:16:17,305
To all you passengers,nothing to worry about,
1141
01:16:17,307 --> 01:16:20,207
certainly no blownfuel lines or
1142
01:16:20,209 --> 01:16:21,976
anything of that nature.
1143
01:16:26,381 --> 01:16:28,382
Gaye, we think
the main fuel line is blown,
1144
01:16:28,384 --> 01:16:31,185
and we might have to make
an emergency landing.
1145
01:16:31,187 --> 01:16:35,089
And, well, neither of us have
actually ever done one before.
1146
01:16:35,091 --> 01:16:37,725
And back in flight school,
you were the best at it.
1147
01:16:37,727 --> 01:16:40,227
So, we're sorry.
1148
01:16:40,229 --> 01:16:42,563
You gotta help us, Larry.
We're scared.
1149
01:16:42,565 --> 01:16:47,435
You spent all those years abusing me,
and now, all of a sudden, you need me.
1150
01:16:47,437 --> 01:16:51,639
I don't know, guys, I mean, I'm
just a lowly waitress with wings.
1151
01:16:51,641 --> 01:16:55,176
A sissy man, an ass pansy,
if you will.
1152
01:16:55,178 --> 01:16:58,946
How could I possibly help you
big, strong, superior pilots?
1153
01:16:58,948 --> 01:17:01,349
Look, we're sorry for all
the stuff that we ever said.
1154
01:17:01,351 --> 01:17:03,017
Yeah, yeah, we never meant it.
1155
01:17:03,019 --> 01:17:05,519
You know, I do.
I say these things sometimes.
1156
01:17:05,521 --> 01:17:07,188
- Well...
- I don't know why.
1157
01:17:07,190 --> 01:17:10,891
- All right, it's okay.
- I'm not a good person, Larry.
1158
01:17:10,893 --> 01:17:13,961
- I forgive you. Now...
- My mom didn't hold me enough,
1159
01:17:13,963 --> 01:17:17,131
and when she did, it was
always at a weird distance.
1160
01:17:17,133 --> 01:17:18,532
Like...
1161
01:17:19,668 --> 01:17:23,404
The way you'd hold
a spool of barbed wire,
1162
01:17:23,406 --> 01:17:27,341
or an angry raccoon,
not a lonely little boy.
1163
01:17:27,343 --> 01:17:31,245
Maybe to compensate, my grandmother
was overly affectionate.
1164
01:17:31,247 --> 01:17:35,049
She would hold me tight
against her ample bosom,
1165
01:17:35,051 --> 01:17:39,754
keep me nestled in there long after
it became difficult to breathe.
1166
01:17:40,022 --> 01:17:41,455
And yet,
1167
01:17:42,624 --> 01:17:44,258
on one level,
1168
01:17:45,427 --> 01:17:47,628
I think I liked it.
1169
01:17:47,630 --> 01:17:50,564
She smelled like
nutmeg. Autumn.
1170
01:17:51,867 --> 01:17:53,701
Okay, guys, listen, we need...
1171
01:17:53,703 --> 01:17:55,069
I once pleasured myself
1172
01:17:55,071 --> 01:17:58,105
to the image of my grandma
jumping on a trampoline.
1173
01:18:01,209 --> 01:18:02,877
I will help land the plane.
1174
01:18:04,846 --> 01:18:06,080
Up.
1175
01:18:08,617 --> 01:18:14,021
Oh, but first, Captain Felder,
I'll need a cup of coffee.
1176
01:18:14,023 --> 01:18:18,159
One sugar and just
a skosh of cream.
1177
01:18:19,828 --> 01:18:22,563
Federated 37 to ground control.
1178
01:18:22,565 --> 01:18:24,965
Come in, Bryce.You got Herb Donkins here.
1179
01:18:24,967 --> 01:18:26,767
Actually, there's been
a slight change, Herb.
1180
01:18:26,769 --> 01:18:28,969
From now on, the man
you'll be talking to is Gaye.
1181
01:18:28,971 --> 01:18:32,273
Oh! Well, good for you, Bryce.Have you told your wife?
1182
01:18:32,275 --> 01:18:34,408
No, Larry Gaye.
I'm a flight attendant,
1183
01:18:34,410 --> 01:18:36,043
and I'm gonna bring
this bird down.
1184
01:18:36,045 --> 01:18:37,978
Well, that's against FAA rules.
1185
01:18:37,980 --> 01:18:42,583
Look, if you want these people
on the ground in one piece,
1186
01:18:42,585 --> 01:18:46,353
then I'm bringing her down.
Now, here's what I'm thinking.
1187
01:18:46,355 --> 01:18:49,006
If we have enough fuel
to reach the ocean...
1188
01:18:49,032 --> 01:18:49,890
- Larry...
1189
01:18:49,892 --> 01:18:53,828
- What? Hello? Hello?
- Larry?
1190
01:18:53,830 --> 01:18:56,163
Come in.
Come in, damn it.
1191
01:18:56,165 --> 01:18:58,032
Okay, you don't have to yell.
1192
01:18:58,034 --> 01:18:59,834
I left room in case
you want some more cream.
1193
01:18:59,836 --> 01:19:01,368
I can't hear a damn thing!
1194
01:19:01,370 --> 01:19:04,038
I said I left room in case you
want to add some more cream!
1195
01:19:04,040 --> 01:19:05,506
Damn it! Where'd you go?
1196
01:19:05,508 --> 01:19:07,842
To get coffee,
like you asked me to!
1197
01:19:09,444 --> 01:19:11,345
Would you like some Chardonnay?
1198
01:19:11,347 --> 01:19:14,181
- Or perhaps some Cabernet-Franc
- What the hell is that?
1199
01:19:14,183 --> 01:19:16,817
It's a combination
of Cabernet and Merlot,
1200
01:19:16,819 --> 01:19:20,321
pairs well with savory meats
like pork, lamb.
1201
01:19:20,323 --> 01:19:21,889
The signals are crossed
with the Flightpal.
1202
01:19:21,891 --> 01:19:23,157
That's why
we've lost our radio.
1203
01:19:23,159 --> 01:19:25,039
Somebody's gotta
take out the Flightpal.
1204
01:19:25,060 --> 01:19:26,994
Bryce, hold our course.
1205
01:19:26,996 --> 01:19:28,095
I'll be right back.
1206
01:19:34,402 --> 01:19:37,872
- Coffee smells good.
- Don't touch anything.
1207
01:19:37,874 --> 01:19:39,740
Hey, Larry,
what the hell is going on?
1208
01:19:39,742 --> 01:19:41,108
What's this about
a blown fuel line?
1209
01:19:41,110 --> 01:19:42,209
No time to explain.
1210
01:19:49,919 --> 01:19:51,919
Take that, robot bitch.
1211
01:19:51,921 --> 01:19:53,921
Uh, Larry.
1212
01:19:53,923 --> 01:19:55,055
That's not her.
1213
01:19:55,057 --> 01:19:56,497
- No?
- No.
1214
01:19:59,294 --> 01:20:00,861
There you are.
1215
01:20:00,863 --> 01:20:03,164
- May I help you?
- Yes, you may.
1216
01:20:11,973 --> 01:20:14,441
I said power down
all electronic devices.
1217
01:20:19,414 --> 01:20:21,348
Dad, what's goin' on?
1218
01:20:21,350 --> 01:20:23,751
Son, how would you like
to come up to the cockpit
1219
01:20:23,753 --> 01:20:27,855
and watch your old man attempt an
incredibly dangerous emergency landing?
1220
01:20:34,996 --> 01:20:38,666
This is Federated 37 to ground control.
Come in, ground control.
1221
01:20:38,668 --> 01:20:41,335
Uh, we read you, Larry, but
you're dropping like a stone.
1222
01:20:42,871 --> 01:20:44,972
According to our gauge, we have
about 30 miles of air left.
1223
01:20:44,974 --> 01:20:46,974
We're about 30 miles
from Los Angeles.
1224
01:20:46,976 --> 01:20:48,909
Then that's where we're going.
1225
01:20:48,911 --> 01:20:50,811
Can we get clearance at LAX?
1226
01:20:50,813 --> 01:20:53,247
Okay, we're gonna clear all runways.
Take your pick.
1227
01:20:53,249 --> 01:20:57,284
Wait, um, would it make more sense to put
the plane towards a less populated area,
1228
01:20:57,286 --> 01:20:59,353
in case we don't have
enough fuel to make it?
1229
01:20:59,355 --> 01:21:01,789
Son, this is no time
for naive questions.
1230
01:21:01,791 --> 01:21:04,258
It's time for heroic
yet impulsive actions.
1231
01:21:04,260 --> 01:21:06,527
Now remember, every second...
1232
01:21:09,030 --> 01:21:11,532
- Larry?
- Dad?
1233
01:21:14,769 --> 01:21:16,971
Yeah, he's, um...
He's 13 years old,
1234
01:21:16,973 --> 01:21:18,672
and I think he's on
one of your flights.
1235
01:21:18,674 --> 01:21:20,241
And in a bizarre turn of
events, we've learned that
1236
01:21:20,243 --> 01:21:22,676
- a flight attendant is going to attempt...
-Do you know Larry Gaye?
1237
01:21:22,678 --> 01:21:25,346
- He could be with him, right?
- ...an emergency landing at LAX.
1238
01:21:25,348 --> 01:21:27,281
As this harrowing storydevelops,
1239
01:21:27,283 --> 01:21:30,317
we're joined by flight
attendant Steven Slater.
1240
01:21:30,319 --> 01:21:31,785
Hi, Tanya, great to be here.
1241
01:21:31,787 --> 01:21:32,887
He's the former...
1242
01:21:39,160 --> 01:21:40,928
Cheese and crackers,
how did we get so low?
1243
01:21:40,930 --> 01:21:42,296
You fell asleep.
1244
01:21:42,298 --> 01:21:44,265
Larry, you areeight miles from LAX.
1245
01:21:44,267 --> 01:21:45,966
How much fuel do you have left?
1246
01:21:45,968 --> 01:21:48,569
Uh, not eight miles' worth.
1247
01:21:48,571 --> 01:21:51,071
There's only one thing
we can do.
1248
01:21:51,073 --> 01:21:53,274
- Urban Landing.
- Don't be an idiot.
1249
01:21:53,276 --> 01:21:55,376
- It's far too risky.
- It's never been done.
1250
01:21:57,178 --> 01:21:59,179
Nathan, I need you up here now.
1251
01:22:00,081 --> 01:22:01,749
Herb, we can't make it
to the airport.
1252
01:22:01,751 --> 01:22:03,984
I'm going to bring her down
in the city.
1253
01:22:03,986 --> 01:22:07,054
Passengers are kind of freakin'
out back there. So I thought...
1254
01:22:07,056 --> 01:22:08,322
Get your priorities
straight, Nathan.
1255
01:22:08,324 --> 01:22:10,157
This is gonna be huge.
1256
01:22:10,159 --> 01:22:11,592
Herb, did you read me?
1257
01:22:11,594 --> 01:22:13,460
We need to land in the city.
1258
01:22:13,462 --> 01:22:16,463
I am sorry, Larry.My shift is ending.
1259
01:22:16,465 --> 01:22:18,599
I'm gonna have to turn youover to Russ Peterson.
1260
01:22:18,601 --> 01:22:20,734
- Have a good one.
- What? You can't do that.
1261
01:22:20,736 --> 01:22:23,737
Hey, Larry, Russ Peterson here.
1262
01:22:23,739 --> 01:22:26,707
Uh, okay, Russ,
we're in a dire emergency.
1263
01:22:26,709 --> 01:22:29,243
- We're gonna run out of fuel any second.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1264
01:22:29,245 --> 01:22:30,945
Hold on, Larry,I just got here.
1265
01:22:30,947 --> 01:22:32,446
Give me a chance to settle in.
1266
01:22:32,448 --> 01:22:34,214
Okay, I'm just...
1267
01:22:34,216 --> 01:22:35,916
I'm taking my jacket off.
1268
01:22:35,918 --> 01:22:38,385
Hey, is that a birthday cake?Who's birthday is it?
1269
01:22:38,955 --> 01:22:43,824
Happy birthday, big thug. Come
here, let me give you a hug.
1270
01:22:43,826 --> 01:22:46,327
Okay, I'm just going to grabmyself a little cake here.
1271
01:22:57,172 --> 01:22:59,773
Okay, I'm back.Now, you were saying?
1272
01:22:59,775 --> 01:23:03,444
We're running out of fuel. I need
to land this plane in Los Angeles.
1273
01:23:03,446 --> 01:23:06,647
- Larry, that's never... -I know,
it's never, but I'm doing it now.
1274
01:23:07,148 --> 01:23:08,849
Son...
1275
01:23:08,851 --> 01:23:11,352
If we don't make it,
I just want you to know,
1276
01:23:12,253 --> 01:23:14,355
- I love you.
- We might not make it?
1277
01:23:14,357 --> 01:23:16,490
Of course
we're going to make it.
1278
01:23:16,492 --> 01:23:18,492
- Huh, yeah
- Yeah.
1279
01:23:20,261 --> 01:23:21,595
Just how good are you?
1280
01:23:22,630 --> 01:23:24,164
Damn, he's good.
1281
01:23:25,567 --> 01:23:27,434
You're a legend.
1282
01:23:27,436 --> 01:23:30,270
Just follow your dreamsand go wherever they take you.
1283
01:23:30,972 --> 01:23:33,340
I have a private bunk
1284
01:23:33,342 --> 01:23:35,776
with the only bathtubin this whole facility.
1285
01:23:35,778 --> 01:23:40,214
Larry? Do you read me?
-Okay. Roger, Russ.
1286
01:23:40,216 --> 01:23:42,716
This is Federated 37 heavy,
coming in on
1287
01:23:42,718 --> 01:23:47,321
uncleared course 45, vector
16, bearing two-niner-zero.
1288
01:23:47,323 --> 01:23:48,455
Urban landing.
1289
01:23:48,457 --> 01:23:50,858
I repeat, urban landing.
1290
01:23:50,860 --> 01:23:52,593
Roger that, Captain Gaye.
1291
01:23:52,595 --> 01:23:55,396
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is your pilot speaking.
1292
01:23:55,964 --> 01:23:57,731
Prepare for arrival.
1293
01:23:57,733 --> 01:24:00,734
Oh, and if we survive, baggage
can be found on carousel 3.
1294
01:24:23,324 --> 01:24:25,192
Uh, do I have space?
1295
01:24:25,194 --> 01:24:27,127
Wait, wait, wait,
after the minivan.
1296
01:24:35,570 --> 01:24:37,650
Uh, this guy's going to
let us in. Thank you.
1297
01:24:49,484 --> 01:24:52,019
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa!
1298
01:24:53,321 --> 01:24:55,522
Okay, okay, okay.
1299
01:24:56,124 --> 01:24:57,691
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa!
1300
01:25:00,596 --> 01:25:03,530
Wheels down. Repeat, we havewheels on the ground.
1301
01:25:03,532 --> 01:25:05,666
Oh! Oh, thank God, Larry.
1302
01:25:05,668 --> 01:25:07,909
Completed an urban landingon a southbound freeway.
1303
01:25:12,607 --> 01:25:16,310
- Ah! You're one
cool customer, Gaye.
1304
01:25:16,312 --> 01:25:18,645
I would've peed in my pants.
1305
01:25:18,647 --> 01:25:20,547
Ha! That's ridiculous.
1306
01:25:20,549 --> 01:25:23,250
Larry! Larry! Larry!
1307
01:25:26,621 --> 01:25:28,722
Dad, I'm sorry I thought
1308
01:25:28,724 --> 01:25:30,791
it was lame to be
a flight attendant.
1309
01:25:30,793 --> 01:25:34,528
That's okay, Son. Look, if it's one thing
that I teach you in this lifetime,
1310
01:25:34,530 --> 01:25:36,530
it's that, well,
1311
01:25:36,532 --> 01:25:40,334
it's that flight attendants pull
every bit as much ass as pilots.
1312
01:25:41,436 --> 01:25:43,403
- Love you, Dad.
- Thanks, Son.
1313
01:25:43,405 --> 01:25:44,805
Bring it here.
1314
01:25:48,343 --> 01:25:51,311
Okay, Lar, let's just
get off at this exit,
1315
01:25:51,313 --> 01:25:53,147
and we can head
back to the airport.
1316
01:25:53,149 --> 01:25:54,681
Not yet.
1317
01:25:54,683 --> 01:25:56,550
I got a stop to make first.
1318
01:26:44,265 --> 01:26:47,067
Uh, yep. There it is.
1319
01:27:17,432 --> 01:27:18,699
Donnie!
1320
01:27:22,003 --> 01:27:23,470
Cross your arms.
1321
01:27:37,152 --> 01:27:39,453
My goodness, Donnie!
1322
01:27:39,455 --> 01:27:41,622
Donnie, I was worried sick!
1323
01:27:47,629 --> 01:27:50,230
I'm sorry. I just
really missed Dad.
1324
01:27:50,232 --> 01:27:53,500
Well, honey, you're gonna have
to learn how to deal with that.
1325
01:27:53,502 --> 01:27:55,703
Daddy doesn't live here.
His home is in the sky.
1326
01:27:56,271 --> 01:27:57,671
Go get into bed, okay?
1327
01:27:57,673 --> 01:27:59,273
Okay.
1328
01:28:03,211 --> 01:28:04,578
Bye, Dad.
1329
01:28:05,146 --> 01:28:06,480
Bye, Son.
1330
01:28:08,983 --> 01:28:10,684
Thanks for bringing him home.
1331
01:28:11,786 --> 01:28:13,387
Actually,
1332
01:28:13,389 --> 01:28:15,789
I did a little thinking
up there,
1333
01:28:15,791 --> 01:28:19,092
while I was saving 200 people
from a fiery death.
1334
01:28:20,161 --> 01:28:21,428
Yeah?
1335
01:28:21,430 --> 01:28:22,696
I thought about how,
1336
01:28:23,998 --> 01:28:27,401
of all the great times
I've had in my life,
1337
01:28:27,403 --> 01:28:30,237
the greatest, the greatest,
1338
01:28:31,339 --> 01:28:32,806
was the time I spent with you.
1339
01:28:35,209 --> 01:28:36,877
Then why did you leave?
1340
01:28:36,879 --> 01:28:39,112
Because I was an idiot,
1341
01:28:39,114 --> 01:28:41,481
who thought that
not being tied down
1342
01:28:41,483 --> 01:28:43,884
and going from woman to woman
1343
01:28:43,886 --> 01:28:45,919
to woman, to, in some cases,
1344
01:28:45,921 --> 01:28:48,522
- women, plural.
- Go on.
1345
01:28:48,524 --> 01:28:50,490
Would be a fun,
fulfilling lifestyle,
1346
01:28:50,492 --> 01:28:53,860
but the truth is,
it was soulless and empty.
1347
01:28:53,862 --> 01:28:57,264
All that meaningless sex
was just filling a hole.
1348
01:28:57,266 --> 01:28:58,899
And by hole,
I don't mean vagina.
1349
01:28:58,901 --> 01:29:00,967
Or in some cases, I guess
I do mean vagina.
1350
01:29:00,969 --> 01:29:02,135
I know what you mean.
1351
01:29:02,137 --> 01:29:03,370
April...
1352
01:29:04,639 --> 01:29:07,040
Is there any chance you could
1353
01:29:07,042 --> 01:29:08,575
see your way clear to
1354
01:29:08,577 --> 01:29:10,077
taking this idiot back?
1355
01:29:10,678 --> 01:29:13,313
Oh, gosh, Larry.
1356
01:29:13,315 --> 01:29:15,782
Did you really think you could
just waltz back into my life
1357
01:29:15,784 --> 01:29:19,386
because you were finally ready and
I'd be sitting here waiting for you?
1358
01:29:20,555 --> 01:29:22,155
Kind of, yeah.
1359
01:29:27,095 --> 01:29:28,428
Oh, no.
1360
01:29:29,330 --> 01:29:31,031
It's too late.
1361
01:29:31,033 --> 01:29:32,733
You've moved on.
1362
01:29:33,568 --> 01:29:34,868
You were the one thing
in my life
1363
01:29:34,870 --> 01:29:36,236
that was real and true,
1364
01:29:36,238 --> 01:29:37,571
and I blew it.
1365
01:29:38,439 --> 01:29:40,073
Gah!
1366
01:29:40,075 --> 01:29:42,376
How could I have thought
you would've waited for me?
1367
01:29:42,378 --> 01:29:44,544
Stupid Larry! Stupid Larry!
1368
01:29:45,980 --> 01:29:48,348
God, please,
1369
01:29:48,350 --> 01:29:51,651
let me drown in this
ocean of despair.
1370
01:29:52,487 --> 01:29:54,221
Without this woman in my life,
1371
01:29:54,989 --> 01:29:57,057
I don't want to live.
1372
01:29:57,059 --> 01:29:58,925
I don't want to live!
1373
01:29:58,927 --> 01:30:00,460
Murphy bed's all fixed.
1374
01:30:00,462 --> 01:30:01,695
Thank you, Karl.
1375
01:30:03,131 --> 01:30:04,264
Oh.
1376
01:30:05,833 --> 01:30:07,434
Larry...
1377
01:30:07,436 --> 01:30:10,203
Listen, when you left and I
never heard from you again,
1378
01:30:10,205 --> 01:30:12,139
that hurt me.
1379
01:30:12,141 --> 01:30:16,643
But when you left Donnie, that
didn't just hurt me, that hurt him.
1380
01:30:16,645 --> 01:30:19,413
I know, and I didn't
want to leave.
1381
01:30:20,915 --> 01:30:22,916
But I didn't believe I could
be any better at fatherhood
1382
01:30:22,918 --> 01:30:24,885
than my own father was.
1383
01:30:26,020 --> 01:30:29,055
But then I landed
that plane safely,
1384
01:30:29,057 --> 01:30:32,092
and I realized that
I can take care of my son.
1385
01:30:32,094 --> 01:30:34,795
And being with him,
and being with you,
1386
01:30:36,397 --> 01:30:38,965
that'll keep me
on the ground for good.
1387
01:30:38,967 --> 01:30:40,887
So you'll really
not fly anymore?
1388
01:30:45,106 --> 01:30:46,206
Oh!
1389
01:30:47,074 --> 01:30:49,142
Well, that is
shockingly painful.
1390
01:30:49,144 --> 01:30:51,411
Like, more than
I would have ever imagined.
1391
01:30:51,413 --> 01:30:53,780
Come here,
Larry Elizabeth Gaye.
1392
01:30:53,782 --> 01:30:56,850
I'm coming,
April Elizabeth Fornicowsky.
1393
01:30:56,852 --> 01:30:58,852
And by coming, I mean
approaching, not ejaculating...
1394
01:30:58,854 --> 01:31:00,353
I know what you mean.
1395
01:31:04,859 --> 01:31:06,193
Aww!
1396
01:31:15,002 --> 01:31:17,337
Donnie! Donnie!
1397
01:31:20,908 --> 01:31:22,509
Daddy's staying.
1398
01:31:22,511 --> 01:31:24,444
- Really?
- Yes, really.
1399
01:31:29,584 --> 01:31:31,785
It's okay, guys. You can go.
1400
01:31:59,680 --> 01:32:03,416
And so, I retired my apron,
1401
01:32:03,418 --> 01:32:07,153
leaving the door open for
someone else to finally win
1402
01:32:07,155 --> 01:32:08,722
the Golden Coffee Pot.
1403
01:32:10,024 --> 01:32:12,726
And because of the way the wiring
interfered with the plane's radios,
1404
01:32:12,728 --> 01:32:17,531
Federated Airlines was forced to
abandon the Flightpal project.
1405
01:32:17,533 --> 01:32:20,233
Three weeks after
that fateful flight,
1406
01:32:20,235 --> 01:32:23,236
I landed April,
my beautiful bride
1407
01:32:23,238 --> 01:32:24,838
and mother of my wonderful,
1408
01:32:24,840 --> 01:32:28,408
and no longer bastard,
son Donnie.
1409
01:32:28,410 --> 01:32:30,582
And the feeling of
crushing empty loneliness
1410
01:32:30,608 --> 01:32:32,512
that dogged me through
the years, well,
1411
01:32:32,514 --> 01:32:34,714
turned out to be
a gluten allergy.
1412
01:32:34,716 --> 01:32:36,349
Six months later,
I found myself
1413
01:32:36,351 --> 01:32:38,652
at a bookstore in downtown LA,
1414
01:32:38,654 --> 01:32:41,988
reading this last chapter
of my book.
1415
01:32:41,990 --> 01:32:44,124
And then something
unbelievable happened.
1416
01:32:44,959 --> 01:32:46,960
I looked up and saw...
1417
01:32:54,368 --> 01:32:55,468
Dad?
1418
01:33:00,875 --> 01:33:02,008
Dad!
1419
01:33:04,512 --> 01:33:05,845
It's me!
1420
01:33:08,783 --> 01:33:10,617
- Larry.
- Larry. Larry.
1421
01:33:12,554 --> 01:33:14,621
You look wonderful, Son.
1422
01:33:16,324 --> 01:33:18,959
You too, Dad.
1423
01:33:18,961 --> 01:33:22,829
You must have come to ask my forgiveness
for walking out all those years ago,
1424
01:33:22,831 --> 01:33:25,231
and to beg me to allow
you back into my life.
1425
01:33:26,867 --> 01:33:30,503
That's exactly right,
Larry, that's why I'm here.
1426
01:33:31,639 --> 01:33:34,474
Well, there was a time...
1427
01:33:34,476 --> 01:33:38,778
There was a time I would've told you to
stick several unwieldy objects in your ass.
1428
01:33:40,281 --> 01:33:42,782
A porcupine, a six iron
1429
01:33:42,784 --> 01:33:44,718
a French horn,
1430
01:33:44,720 --> 01:33:46,286
ceramic pineapple.
1431
01:33:47,355 --> 01:33:48,555
But...
1432
01:33:49,957 --> 01:33:52,659
I've learned a little
something about fatherhood.
1433
01:33:56,497 --> 01:33:57,664
So...
1434
01:33:58,866 --> 01:34:00,166
Whoo!
1435
01:34:00,935 --> 01:34:02,402
I forgive you, Dad.
1436
01:34:02,404 --> 01:34:03,804
- Oh...
- Welcome back into my life.
1437
01:34:03,805 --> 01:34:05,205
Oh!
1438
01:34:05,207 --> 01:34:08,308
Thank God.
Thank God!
1439
01:34:08,909 --> 01:34:10,310
Oh, that is...
1440
01:34:10,312 --> 01:34:12,979
- That is such a huge relief.
- Oh!
1441
01:34:12,981 --> 01:34:14,247
I know.
- Boy, oh, boy.
1442
01:34:14,249 --> 01:34:16,549
I know.
1443
01:34:16,551 --> 01:34:18,618
- For me, too. For me, too.
- Yeah, yeah.
1444
01:34:20,254 --> 01:34:21,521
Uh...
1445
01:34:21,523 --> 01:34:23,723
You got to give me a second.
I got to move my car.
1446
01:34:23,725 --> 01:34:25,825
- I'm double parked.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1447
01:34:27,062 --> 01:34:28,561
I'll be right back.
1448
01:34:28,563 --> 01:34:29,763
- You got it, Dad.
- You got it.
1449
01:34:29,765 --> 01:34:30,897
You got it.
1450
01:34:30,899 --> 01:34:33,199
- You got it!
1451
01:34:39,907 --> 01:34:41,041
Ah!
1452
01:34:44,178 --> 01:34:47,614
I can't wait to resume
my relationship with that guy.
1453
01:34:48,516 --> 01:34:49,582
Oh!
1454
01:34:50,618 --> 01:34:52,185
Uh...
1455
01:34:52,187 --> 01:34:54,888
Anyway, anyway...
1456
01:34:56,257 --> 01:34:58,825
Then I closed the book
1457
01:34:58,827 --> 01:35:00,493
to thunderous applause.
1458
01:35:06,167 --> 01:35:08,935
Uh, it said
"thunderous applause."
1459
01:37:05,954 --> 01:37:07,687
- Four seems like plenty.
- Fine.
1459
01:37:08,305 --> 01:37:14,929
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