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1
00:00:03,434 --> 00:00:06,107
DAD, "MARTIAN SNIPER 2"
IS OUT.
2
00:00:06,107 --> 00:00:08,639
WE´VE GOT TO GO BUY IT
BEFORE THEY´RE ALL GONE.
3
00:00:08,639 --> 00:00:10,741
I´VE BEEN OUT OF WORK A WHILE.
MONEY´S A LITTLE TIGHT.
4
00:00:10,741 --> 00:00:13,384
SO NOW´S NOT
A GOOD TIME, OKAY?
5
00:00:13,384 --> 00:00:18,389
HOW ABOUT NOW?
6
00:00:18,389 --> 00:00:21,092
HONEY, I WAS THINKING...
7
00:00:21,092 --> 00:00:23,124
I KNOW IT´S OUR ANNIVERSARY
NEXT WEEK,
8
00:00:23,124 --> 00:00:25,256
BUT SINCE WE´RE CATCHING UP
ON OUR BILLS,
9
00:00:25,256 --> 00:00:27,598
WHY DON´T WE LET EACH OTHER
OFF THE HOOK THIS YEAR, HUH?
10
00:00:27,598 --> 00:00:29,560
YES!
NO GIFTS!
11
00:00:29,560 --> 00:00:32,163
YOU DON´T KNOW THE HELL
I GO THROUGH TRYING TO FIND YOU
12
00:00:32,163 --> 00:00:34,165
SOME OVERPRICED,
MEANINGLESS PIECE OF --
13
00:00:34,165 --> 00:00:36,437
I DIDN´T SAY NO GIFTS.
14
00:00:37,668 --> 00:00:40,541
I JUST THINK THIS YEAR,
WE SHOULD GIVE EACH OTHER
15
00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,743
SOMETHING THAT REPRESENTS
OUR LOVE.
16
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:46,517
YOU KNOW, SOMETHING CREATIVE,
THAT COMES FROM THE HEART.
17
00:00:46,517 --> 00:00:48,179
OH, MAN.
18
00:00:48,179 --> 00:00:50,281
AHH!
THIS IS TOO WEAK.
19
00:00:50,281 --> 00:00:54,325
IN CUBA, EVEN BABIES
DRINK COFFEE STRONGER THAN THIS.
20
00:00:54,325 --> 00:00:57,388
BECAUSE THEY HAVEN´T HAD MILK
SINCE 1959.
21
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:02,233
GEORGE, CAN YOU TAKE MY DAD
TO THIRSTY´S WITH YOU?
22
00:01:02,233 --> 00:01:05,065
I CAN´T GET ANY WORK DONE
WITH HIM HERE IN THE HOUSE.
23
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,597
WHAT´S HIS PROBLEM?
24
00:01:06,597 --> 00:01:08,599
HE CAN´T
OPEN HIS PRACTICE
25
00:01:08,599 --> 00:01:10,741
UNTIL HIS MEDICAL LICENSE
TRANSFERS FROM FLORIDA.
26
00:01:10,741 --> 00:01:13,104
HE´S GOING CRAZY.
HE´S DYING TO GET BACK TO WORK.
27
00:01:13,104 --> 00:01:14,745
ALL RIGHT.
28
00:01:14,745 --> 00:01:17,748
BUT YOU KNOW, HE COULD ALWAYS BE
A BACK-ALLEY CARDIOLOGIST.
29
00:01:17,748 --> 00:01:22,253
"PSST, OYE.
GET IN THE VAN.
30
00:01:22,253 --> 00:01:25,716
"I´M DOING ANGIOPLASTIES
FOR 20 BUCKS.
31
00:01:25,716 --> 00:01:28,088
"AND I´LL
THROW IN THE SPEAKERS, HUH?
32
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:31,662
YOU LIKE THE SUBWOOFER?
HOW ABOUT THE TWEETERS, OKAY?"
33
00:01:33,864 --> 00:01:37,398
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES WHEN
YOU DON´T GET WHAT YOU WANT,
34
00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:39,800
YOU GOTTA WORK THE SYSTEM
A LITTLE.
35
00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,633
YOU KNOW, LIKE WHEN GRANDMA
WANTS A FREE DINNER, SHE --
36
00:01:42,633 --> 00:01:45,636
COMES TO OUR HOUSE?
NO!
37
00:01:45,636 --> 00:01:48,779
SHE GOES TO A RESTAURANT
AND LIES THAT IT´S HER BIRTHDAY.
38
00:01:48,779 --> 00:01:52,543
I WISH I COULD HAVE
A FAKE BIRTHDAY PARTY.
39
00:01:52,543 --> 00:01:54,315
WELL, MAYBE YOU CAN.
40
00:01:54,315 --> 00:01:55,786
HOW WOULD I DO THAT?
41
00:01:55,786 --> 00:01:58,889
FIRST YOU GOTTA FIND
A BUNCH OF KIDS THAT DON´T KNOW
42
00:01:58,889 --> 00:02:02,523
WHEN YOUR REAL BIRTHDAY IS,
YOU KNOW, KIDS YOU CAN FOOL.
43
00:02:02,523 --> 00:02:05,196
THE KIDS
FROM MY SPECIAL ED CLASS --
44
00:02:05,196 --> 00:02:06,857
THEY BARELY KNOW ME.
45
00:02:13,264 --> 00:02:15,636
HEY, LOOK,
2-FOR-1 DAIQUIRIS.
46
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:20,871
YOU KNOW, THE DAIQUIRI
IS NAMED AFTER A CUBAN RIVER.
47
00:02:20,871 --> 00:02:24,575
NOW IT JUST REMINDS ME
HOW THINGS USED TO BE
48
00:02:24,575 --> 00:02:27,348
BEFORE THE REVOLUTION.
49
00:02:27,348 --> 00:02:31,622
TODAY, I WOULDN´T DRINK
A DAIQUIRI UNLESS IT WAS MADE
50
00:02:31,622 --> 00:02:35,256
FROM CASTRO´S FROZEN,
SLUSHY BLOOD.
51
00:02:35,256 --> 00:02:37,688
DOES THAT DAIQUIRI RIVER
52
00:02:37,688 --> 00:02:40,491
RUN INTO A VALLEY
CALLED "GET OVER IT"?
53
00:02:40,491 --> 00:02:42,893
THREE BEERS.
54
00:02:42,893 --> 00:02:44,795
SORRY.
MY MIND IS BURDENED.
55
00:02:44,795 --> 00:02:47,498
LOOK, VIC, MAN,
I KNOW IT´S GONNA BE A WHILE
56
00:02:47,498 --> 00:02:49,700
BEFORE YOU CAN
PRACTICE CARDIOLOGY, MAN,
57
00:02:49,700 --> 00:02:51,171
BUT THINK OF IT
THIS WAY --
58
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:53,244
THERE´S A WHOLE GENERATION
OUT THERE
59
00:02:53,244 --> 00:02:55,946
OF OBESE CHILDREN
WHO ARE ONLY GETTING FATTER.
60
00:02:55,946 --> 00:02:59,380
HEY, CHA-CHING!
61
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:02,753
THAT´S NOT WHAT´S TROUBLING ME.
IT´S MY BROTHER OCTAVIO.
62
00:03:02,753 --> 00:03:05,816
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE
GETTING OUT OF CUBA THIS MONTH.
63
00:03:05,816 --> 00:03:09,760
BUT I FOUND OUT THIS MORNING
THAT CASTRO WON´T LET HIM GO.
64
00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:11,792
ANGIE DOESN´T KNOW,
DOES SHE?
65
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:13,894
NO. I DIDN´T HAVE THE HEART
TO TELL HER.
66
00:03:13,894 --> 00:03:15,926
SHE HASN´T SEEN HER UNCLE
SINCE SHE WAS 12,
67
00:03:15,926 --> 00:03:18,299
AND NOW SHE MAY
NEVER GET THE CHANCE.
68
00:03:18,299 --> 00:03:19,400
YOU KNOW WHAT?
69
00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:21,372
IF CASTRO
WAS HERE RIGHT NOW,
70
00:03:21,372 --> 00:03:24,705
WE COULD TAKE TURNS
KICKING HIS KHAKI-COVERED ASS.
71
00:03:24,705 --> 00:03:26,807
I´D BE INTO THAT.
ME TOO.
72
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:29,640
AND THEN WHILE
HE WAS LAYING ON THE FLOOR
73
00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:31,342
PICKING TEETH OUT OF HIS BEARD,
74
00:03:31,342 --> 00:03:34,285
WE COULD GO DOWN TO CUBA
AND BUST MY BROTHER OUT.
75
00:03:34,285 --> 00:03:38,289
YOU´RE DAMN RIGHT
WE COULD.
JUST TRY
AND STOP US!
76
00:03:38,289 --> 00:03:40,551
WE COULD USE MY BOAT.
77
00:03:40,551 --> 00:03:41,892
CALL HIM RIGHT NOW.
I´LL GO.
78
00:03:41,892 --> 00:03:44,295
I´LL BE
THE PIRATE OF THE CARIBBEAN.
79
00:03:44,295 --> 00:03:45,726
I GOT AN EYE PATCH.
80
00:03:47,658 --> 00:03:50,801
LET´S DO IT, GEORGE.
LET´S GO GET HIM.
81
00:03:50,801 --> 00:03:53,704
I´LL BUY US
PLANE TICKETS TONIGHT.
82
00:03:53,704 --> 00:03:56,307
WHOA, VIC,
I WASN´T SERIOUS.
83
00:03:56,307 --> 00:03:58,609
THAT´S JUST BAR TALK.
84
00:03:58,609 --> 00:04:00,641
IF WE DID EVERYTHING
WE SAID OVER A BEER,
85
00:04:00,641 --> 00:04:02,713
I´D BE PLAYING QUARTERBACK
FOR THE RAIDERS
86
00:04:02,713 --> 00:04:04,545
AND ERNIE WOULD BE
A FIGHTER PILOT.
87
00:04:04,545 --> 00:04:08,549
I´D BE "HOT WINGS."
88
00:04:08,549 --> 00:04:11,952
THIS IS NOT A DELUSIONAL FANTASY
FOR ME, HUH?
89
00:04:11,952 --> 00:04:13,984
COME ON, IF OCTAVIO
CAN GET A BOAT,
90
00:04:13,984 --> 00:04:16,357
WE COULD MEET HIM
IN INTERNATIONAL WATERS
91
00:04:16,357 --> 00:04:17,628
AND TAKE HIM
TO FLORIDA.
92
00:04:17,628 --> 00:04:19,029
HE SETS ONE FOOT
ON LAND,
93
00:04:19,029 --> 00:04:21,362
FILLS OUT SOME PAPERWORK,
AND THEN PAM-PAM,
94
00:04:21,362 --> 00:04:22,593
HE GETS ASYLUM.
95
00:04:22,593 --> 00:04:23,994
LISTEN, VIC,
96
00:04:23,994 --> 00:04:25,996
WHAT CASTRO´S DOING
TO YOUR BROTHER SUCKS, MAN,
97
00:04:25,996 --> 00:04:28,399
BUT I CAN´T GO.
I GOT A FAMILY TO THINK ABOUT.
98
00:04:28,399 --> 00:04:30,801
SO, YOU´RE
A BIG A-FRAIDY-CAT?
99
00:04:32,743 --> 00:04:35,976
[ Mockingly ]
YES, I´M A BIG A-FRAIDY-CAT.
100
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,509
I´M AFRAID OF THE OCEAN,
I´M AFRAID OF THE COAST GUARD,
101
00:04:38,509 --> 00:04:39,950
BUT MOST OF ALL,
102
00:04:39,950 --> 00:04:42,413
I´M AFRAID OF WHAT ANGIE
WOULD DO IF SHE FOUND OUT.
103
00:04:42,413 --> 00:04:44,054
WELL, YOU DON´T TELL HER.
104
00:04:44,054 --> 00:04:47,017
YOU JUST SURPRISE HER
WITH OCTAVIO.
105
00:04:47,017 --> 00:04:50,361
THAT´S THE BEST
ANNIVERSARY PRESENT EVER.
106
00:04:50,361 --> 00:04:54,325
OH, MAN, THAT WOULD BE
A HELL OF A GIFT.
107
00:04:55,496 --> 00:04:56,897
WHAT IF WE GET CAUGHT?
108
00:04:56,897 --> 00:04:58,899
WE´LL BE
RESCUING A FAMILY MEMBER
109
00:04:58,899 --> 00:05:00,501
WHO NEEDS POLITICAL ASYLUM.
110
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:01,902
THEY DON´T PROSECUTE.
111
00:05:01,902 --> 00:05:05,035
YOU JUST GET
A WRIST SLAPPING...
112
00:05:05,035 --> 00:05:08,479
PROBABLY.
113
00:05:08,479 --> 00:05:10,310
PROBABLY?
114
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:11,642
I WANNA GO.
115
00:05:11,642 --> 00:05:14,014
I WANNA HELP
SOMEBODY GET THEIR FREEDOM.
116
00:05:14,014 --> 00:05:16,817
PLUS, MAYBE THERE WOULD BE
A WOMAN FLOATING OUT THERE
117
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:18,349
THAT I COULD MEET
118
00:05:18,349 --> 00:05:21,091
BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE IN AMERICA
GOT A SHOT.
119
00:05:21,091 --> 00:05:24,094
I DON´T KNOW, VIC.
120
00:05:24,094 --> 00:05:26,797
SO, JUST OUT OF CURIOSITY,
121
00:05:26,797 --> 00:05:30,531
WHAT ANNIVERSARY GIFT
ARE YOU PLANNING TO GIVE ANGIE?
122
00:05:30,531 --> 00:05:34,064
WELL, I WAS GONNA MAKE
THIS RED PAPIER-MâCHé HEART
123
00:05:34,064 --> 00:05:36,967
OUT OF TOILET PAPER ROLLS
THAT SAYS --
124
00:05:39,470 --> 00:05:41,111
ALL RIGHT, I´M IN.
125
00:05:43,544 --> 00:05:48,579
[ "LOW RIDER" PLAYS ]
126
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,394
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA --
VIC, VIC, VIC --
127
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,926
IF ANGIE´S GONNA
BELIEVE OUR STORY, MAN,
128
00:06:35,926 --> 00:06:38,068
YOU GOTTA SIT HERE
AND LOOK DEPRESSED.
129
00:06:38,068 --> 00:06:40,471
BUT I´M TOO EXCITED
TO ACT DEPRESSED.
130
00:06:40,471 --> 00:06:43,133
YOUR WIFE LEFT YOU
FOR A YOUNGER MAN.
131
00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:48,138
PERFECT.
132
00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:51,982
HOW´S MY DAD DOING?
133
00:06:51,982 --> 00:06:54,144
OH, NOT GOOD.
134
00:06:54,144 --> 00:06:55,616
POOR DADDY.
135
00:06:55,616 --> 00:06:57,588
I HAVEN´T SEEN
THAT LOOK ON HIS FACE
136
00:06:57,588 --> 00:06:59,790
SINCE I TOLD HIM
WE WERE GETTING MARRIED.
137
00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:03,894
HE´S SO LOW. I MEAN,
HE´S TALKING CRAZY, ANGIE.
138
00:07:03,894 --> 00:07:05,856
HE WANTS TO TAKE
ME AND ERNIE TO MIAMI
139
00:07:05,856 --> 00:07:08,028
FOR A WEEKEND FISHING TRIP
ON HIS BOAT.
140
00:07:08,028 --> 00:07:10,501
I THINK
THAT´S A GREAT IDEA.
141
00:07:10,501 --> 00:07:12,663
NO, ANGIE.
FISHING WITH YOUR DAD?
142
00:07:12,663 --> 00:07:15,135
IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO ME.
PLEASE?
143
00:07:17,908 --> 00:07:19,439
OKAY.
144
00:07:27,618 --> 00:07:30,781
GEORGE IS GOING OUT OF
TOWN FOR THE WEEKEND
AND I GOT A SEMINAR.
145
00:07:30,781 --> 00:07:31,852
CAN YOU WATCH THE KIDS?
146
00:07:31,852 --> 00:07:33,484
SURE.
147
00:07:33,484 --> 00:07:35,856
I GUESS I CAN THINK OF SOMETHING
TO KEEP THEM BUSY.
148
00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:38,088
THANKS.
149
00:07:38,088 --> 00:07:39,830
SO YOUR MOM
WILL BE WORKING LATE
150
00:07:39,830 --> 00:07:41,932
AND YOUR DAD WILL BE
OUT OF TOWN.
151
00:07:41,932 --> 00:07:44,935
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.
152
00:07:44,935 --> 00:07:47,798
GET YOUR CLASS LIST.
WE´LL START CALLING.
153
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:50,470
ALL RIGHT.
154
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:53,944
JAMIE ANDERSON.
155
00:07:53,944 --> 00:07:57,878
HI. THIS IS BENITA LOPEZ,
MAX LOPEZ´S GRANDMA.
156
00:07:57,878 --> 00:08:00,811
I KNOW THAT THIS
IS LAST MINUTE,
157
00:08:00,811 --> 00:08:03,754
BUT MAX IS GONNA HAVE
A BIRTHDAY PARTY THIS SUNDAY,
158
00:08:03,754 --> 00:08:06,216
AND HE WOULD BE CRUSHED
IF JAMIE COULDN´T COME.
159
00:08:06,216 --> 00:08:08,118
HE´S CRAZY ABOUT HER.
HIM.
160
00:08:08,118 --> 00:08:11,822
I´M SORRY -- HIM.
I´VE HAD A FEW.
161
00:08:11,822 --> 00:08:13,263
OH, GREAT.
162
00:08:13,263 --> 00:08:14,965
I BET THE BIRTHDAY BOY
163
00:08:14,965 --> 00:08:19,530
WOULD LIKE A "MARTIAN SNIPER 2"
VIDEO GAME.
164
00:08:20,601 --> 00:08:22,272
THANK YOU.
165
00:08:22,272 --> 00:08:24,134
THIS IS GONNA BE PERFECT.
166
00:08:24,134 --> 00:08:28,238
OH, NO, IT´S NOT.
´CAUSE I´M TELLING MOM AND DAD.
167
00:08:28,238 --> 00:08:31,011
ALL RIGHT.
WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO?
168
00:08:31,011 --> 00:08:33,243
YOU GOTTA ASK
ONE OF YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS
169
00:08:33,243 --> 00:08:35,946
FOR A PINK T-SHIRT
THAT SAYS "PARTY GIRL" ON IT.
170
00:08:35,946 --> 00:08:38,589
NO WAY! THEY´RE GONNA
THINK IT´S FOR ME.
171
00:08:38,589 --> 00:08:41,291
YUP.
172
00:08:41,291 --> 00:08:43,854
IT´S A ROTTEN THING TO DO.
173
00:08:43,854 --> 00:08:45,195
I KNOW.
174
00:08:45,195 --> 00:08:48,058
AND I HATE THAT YOU´RE GONNA
ASK THE NEXT KID
175
00:08:48,058 --> 00:08:50,300
FOR ROACH TRAPS
AND FLIP FLOPS.
176
00:08:51,562 --> 00:08:55,135
I GOT A LITTLE INSECT PROBLEM
AT THE HOUSE.
177
00:08:58,268 --> 00:09:01,271
[ VIC MOANING ]
178
00:09:01,271 --> 00:09:03,674
VIC, DO YOU SEE OCTAVIO?
179
00:09:03,674 --> 00:09:05,876
NO.
JUST MY LUNCH.
180
00:09:05,876 --> 00:09:09,920
PLEASE, DEAR GOD,
MAKE THE ROCKING STOP.
181
00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:12,983
THIS IS YOUR FISHING BOAT, MAN.
HOW COULD YOU BE SEASICK?
182
00:09:12,983 --> 00:09:14,855
I DON´T
GO ON THE OCEAN.
183
00:09:14,855 --> 00:09:16,757
I JUST PUTTER
AROUND BISCAYNE BAY
184
00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:18,158
TO IMPRESS MY FRIENDS.
185
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:20,631
I SHOW THEM THE BACK
OF GLORIA ESTEFAN´S HOUSE
186
00:09:20,631 --> 00:09:23,734
AND THEN I GO HOME.
187
00:09:23,734 --> 00:09:25,636
I´M GONNA LIE DOWN.
188
00:09:34,144 --> 00:09:36,146
WHOA! WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING?!
189
00:09:36,146 --> 00:09:38,779
I´M THROWING CHUM IN THE WATER.
I´M GONNA FISH.
190
00:09:38,779 --> 00:09:41,011
ARE YOU CRAZY?
YOU´RE ATTRACTING SHARKS.
191
00:09:41,011 --> 00:09:43,313
HEY, MAN, OCTAVIO NEEDS
TO PUT ONE FOOT ON AMERICAN SOIL
192
00:09:43,313 --> 00:09:44,815
TO GET ASYLUM.
193
00:09:44,815 --> 00:09:46,687
YOU KNOW HOW HARD
THAT´S GONNA BE
194
00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:49,920
IF HE DOESN´T
HAVE ANY LEGS?
195
00:09:49,920 --> 00:09:51,622
HEY, GEORGE.
196
00:09:51,622 --> 00:09:55,896
GEORGE, LOOK, THERE´S SOME GUYS
ON A RAFT-BOX-TIRE THING.
197
00:09:57,798 --> 00:10:00,801
OCTAVIO!
HEY, THEY´RE --
THEY´RE WAVING.
198
00:10:00,801 --> 00:10:02,332
OCTAVIO!
HEY!
199
00:10:02,332 --> 00:10:04,204
OCTAVIO!
HEY!
200
00:10:04,204 --> 00:10:05,936
Man: HEY!
201
00:10:05,936 --> 00:10:07,878
VIC!
[ VIC MOANS ]
202
00:10:07,878 --> 00:10:09,710
GET UP HERE, MAN.
WE FOUND YOUR BROTHER.
203
00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:11,611
I´M COMING.
I´M COMING.
204
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,213
HEY! OVER HERE!
205
00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:15,085
OVER HERE!
OCTAVIO!
206
00:10:15,085 --> 00:10:19,950
Ernie: HEY!
WE GOT HIM, EH?
207
00:10:19,950 --> 00:10:21,722
OVER HERE.
208
00:10:23,694 --> 00:10:25,696
WELCOME ABOARD, OCTAVIO.
209
00:10:28,158 --> 00:10:29,830
VIC, WE DID IT!
210
00:10:29,830 --> 00:10:31,902
WE DID IT.
WE DID IT, VIC.
211
00:10:31,902 --> 00:10:34,705
SAY HELLO
TO YOUR BROTHER OCTAVIO.
212
00:10:36,707 --> 00:10:38,707
THAT´S NOT OCTAVIO.
213
00:10:37,407 --> 00:10:38,869
WHO ARE YOU?
214
00:10:38,869 --> 00:10:42,242
[ SPEAKING FRENCH ]
215
00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:45,215
THIS IS A HAITIAN.
216
00:10:45,215 --> 00:10:47,848
WHEN YOU RESCUE A RELATIVE,
IT´S A SLAP ON THE WRIST.
217
00:10:47,848 --> 00:10:49,850
OH, MAN,
WHERE DO THEY SLAP YOU
218
00:10:49,850 --> 00:10:52,122
WHEN YOU´RE CAUGHT
WITH A BOATLOAD OF HAITIANS?
219
00:10:52,122 --> 00:10:54,324
WELL, THAT´S
CONSIDERED SMUGGLING.
220
00:10:54,324 --> 00:10:57,087
YOU GO TO JAIL
FOR FIVE YEARS.
221
00:10:57,087 --> 00:11:00,330
FIVE YEARS? WHAT AM I GONNA
TELL ANGIE AND THE KIDS?
222
00:11:00,330 --> 00:11:05,035
WHAT AM I GONNA TELL MY MOM?
SHE THINKS I´M AT EPCOT!
223
00:11:15,405 --> 00:11:17,778
MAN, THESE GUYS ARE EATING
224
00:11:17,778 --> 00:11:20,110
LIKE THEY NEVER HAD
A PIZZA BAGEL BEFORE.
225
00:11:22,012 --> 00:11:24,815
WHERE THE HELL IS OCTAVIO?
226
00:11:24,815 --> 00:11:26,917
HE RADIOED ME
THESE EXACT COORDINATES.
227
00:11:26,917 --> 00:11:28,688
HE SHOULD BE HERE.
228
00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:31,021
OH, MY GOD!
IT´S A COAST GUARD PLANE!
229
00:11:31,021 --> 00:11:33,023
THEY FOUND US!
GEORGE!
230
00:11:33,023 --> 00:11:36,326
DUDE, THAT´S A PELICAN!
231
00:11:36,326 --> 00:11:38,098
THIS IS CRAZY!
232
00:11:38,098 --> 00:11:40,200
WE CAN´T GO TO JAIL FOR A BUNCH
OF GUYS WE DON´T KNOW.
233
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,972
I´M GONNA CALL THE COAST GUARD,
234
00:11:41,972 --> 00:11:43,874
TELL THEM WE RESCUED SOME
HAITIANS AND END THIS THING.
235
00:11:43,874 --> 00:11:46,907
AND WHAT IF OCTAVIO COMES
WHEN THE COAST GUARD IS HERE?
236
00:11:46,907 --> 00:11:48,909
DO YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD
HAPPEN TO HIM
237
00:11:48,909 --> 00:11:50,110
IF HE WAS SENT BACK TO CUBA?
238
00:11:50,110 --> 00:11:53,944
FINE.
WE´LL KEEP LOOKING.
239
00:11:53,944 --> 00:11:55,946
ERNIE, MAKES SURE THESE GUYS
STAY DOWN HERE.
240
00:11:55,946 --> 00:11:57,948
HEY, GEORGE, DON´T LEAVE ME.
WE´RE OUT OF FOOD.
241
00:11:57,948 --> 00:12:00,220
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
I DON´T CARE.
242
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:04,124
BUTTER YOURSELF UP
AND PLAY KEEP-AWAY.
243
00:12:09,429 --> 00:12:12,833
OH, GREAT.
A "PARTY GIRL" T-SHIRT.
244
00:12:12,833 --> 00:12:14,204
YOU KNOW WHAT?
245
00:12:14,204 --> 00:12:16,236
WHY DON´T YOU HELP YOURSELF
TO SOME PUNCH
246
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:18,138
AND WHATEVER´S LEFT
OF THE COOKIE.
247
00:12:18,138 --> 00:12:21,241
MOM JUST CALLED.
SHE´S COMING HOME EARLY.
248
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:23,243
WE GOTTA GET THEM
OUT OF HERE.
249
00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:25,375
BUT WE DIDN´T SING
OR DO THE CAKE.
250
00:12:25,375 --> 00:12:26,416
RIGHT.
251
00:12:26,416 --> 00:12:28,378
OKAY, KIDS.
GET OVER HERE.
252
00:12:28,378 --> 00:12:32,282
COME ON,
MOVE IT OR LOSE IT.
253
00:12:32,282 --> 00:12:36,086
NOW, FOR OUR SONG TODAY,
WE HAVE OUR OWN SPECIAL VERSION,
254
00:12:36,086 --> 00:12:38,358
AND I´M SURE
THAT YOU KIDS WILL LOVE IT.
255
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:39,960
ALL RIGHT...
256
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:41,291
♫ IT´S YOUR BIRTHDAY
HERE´S YOUR SONG ♫
257
00:12:41,291 --> 00:12:42,462
♫ NOW YOUR SONG IS OVER ♫
258
00:12:44,094 --> 00:12:46,196
WHOA! OH, MY GOODNESS,
FELL RIGHT ON THE GROUND.
259
00:12:46,196 --> 00:12:48,338
CAN´T EAT IT.
LET´S GO.
260
00:12:48,338 --> 00:12:50,770
WE NEVER
PLAYED ANY GAMES.
261
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:53,173
OKAY. WE´RE GONNA PLAY A GAME
CALLED "CLOWN CAR."
262
00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:56,776
ALL YOU CLOWNS ARE GONNA
PILE INTO MY CAR, AND THEN
I´M GONNA TAKE YOU HOME.
263
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,348
LET´S GO.
264
00:13:00,550 --> 00:13:02,552
HERE, YEAH, OKAY.
265
00:13:05,155 --> 00:13:09,159
HEY, I SEE
THE COASTLINE.
266
00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:13,423
I HAVE
FAILED OCTAVIO.
267
00:13:13,423 --> 00:13:15,325
VIC, WE HAD
TO COME BACK, MAN.
268
00:13:15,325 --> 00:13:16,997
WE WERE RUNNING OUT OF FUEL.
269
00:13:16,997 --> 00:13:18,468
COME ON,
WE HAD A GOOD DAY.
270
00:13:18,468 --> 00:13:22,472
WE GOT SOME SUN,
WE SAVED A FEW HAITIANS.
271
00:13:22,472 --> 00:13:26,136
YOU PUKED UP THOSE FIVE POUNDS
YOU WERE TRYING TO LOSE.
272
00:13:26,136 --> 00:13:30,010
MY BROTHER IS FLOATING
SOMEWHERE IN THE OCEAN,
273
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:31,942
AND YOU MAKE THE FUNNIES.
274
00:13:31,942 --> 00:13:33,413
LOOK, MAN.
275
00:13:33,413 --> 00:13:35,385
MAYBE SOMEBODY ELSE
PICKED HIM UP.
276
00:13:35,385 --> 00:13:37,948
I MEAN, WE TRIED, VIC.
WE DID OUR BEST.
277
00:13:37,948 --> 00:13:40,490
Ernie: HEY, CHECK IT OUT,
THERE´S ANOTHER BOAT OF HAITIANS
278
00:13:40,490 --> 00:13:43,823
AND THEY GOT A SIGN THAT SAYS,
"VIC PALMERO."
279
00:13:46,857 --> 00:13:50,100
Vic: THAT LOOKS
LIKE OCTAVIO.
280
00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:51,831
CUT THE ENGINE, ERNIE.
281
00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:56,867
Vic: MI HERMANO!
MI HERMANO!
282
00:13:58,568 --> 00:14:01,371
OCTAVIO!
MI HERMANO!
283
00:14:01,371 --> 00:14:04,374
VICTOR!
OCTAVIO!
284
00:14:04,374 --> 00:14:07,347
I HAVE WAITED A LONG TIME
FOR THIS MOMENT.
285
00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:10,550
YOUR KISSES
SMELL LIKE VOMIT!
286
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,424
I DIDN´T SEE --
287
00:14:14,424 --> 00:14:16,426
I DIDN´T SEE YOU
AT THE MEETING POINT,
288
00:14:16,426 --> 00:14:18,288
SO I WENT FOR LAND.
289
00:14:18,288 --> 00:14:21,491
IT DOESN´T MATTER NOW.
WE ARE TOGETHER.
290
00:14:21,491 --> 00:14:24,164
THIS IS GEORGE,
ANGIE´S HUSBAND.
291
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,997
THE ONE WHO KEPT HER
FROM COLLEGE?
292
00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:31,571
OCTAVIO,
WELCOME TO AMERICA,
293
00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:34,044
THE LAND OF THE FREE
AND THE HOME OF THE BRAVE.
294
00:14:34,044 --> 00:14:36,907
YOU NO LONGER HAVE TO FEAR
AN OPPRESSIVE GOVERNMENT.
295
00:14:36,907 --> 00:14:39,049
Man: [ On bullhorn ]
THIS IS THE COAST GUARD.
296
00:14:39,049 --> 00:14:41,451
ANCHOR YOUR VESSEL.
297
00:14:41,451 --> 00:14:44,514
SWIM!
SWIM FOR YOUR LIVES!
298
00:14:44,514 --> 00:14:47,457
SWIM!
299
00:14:47,457 --> 00:14:50,320
GIVE THE HAITIANS
A HEAD START!
300
00:14:56,196 --> 00:14:58,628
HEY.
IS YOUR MOM HOME YET?
301
00:14:58,628 --> 00:15:00,030
NOPE.
GOOD.
302
00:15:00,030 --> 00:15:01,331
WHERE ARE YOUR PRESENTS?
303
00:15:01,331 --> 00:15:04,004
HIDDEN UNDER MY BED,
JUST LIKE YOU TOLD ME.
304
00:15:05,475 --> 00:15:08,238
HEY, GUYS.
305
00:15:08,238 --> 00:15:11,381
MAX, I KNOW
YOU WERE DISAPPOINTED
306
00:15:11,381 --> 00:15:15,045
YOU COULDN´T GET
THAT NEW VIDEO GAME YOU WANTED,
307
00:15:15,045 --> 00:15:19,449
SO I PICKED YOU UP
A LITTLE SURPRISE.
308
00:15:19,449 --> 00:15:22,252
A PUZZLE.
309
00:15:22,252 --> 00:15:23,623
A POLAR BEAR PUZZLE.
310
00:15:26,096 --> 00:15:28,328
ICEBERG --
ALL THOSE WHITE PIECES
311
00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:30,630
ARE SURE GONNA BE
A BIG CHALLENGE.
312
00:15:30,630 --> 00:15:32,963
SORRY I´M LATE.
313
00:15:32,963 --> 00:15:35,265
I WENT TO ANOTHER BIRTHDAY PARTY
WITH MY SISTER.
314
00:15:35,265 --> 00:15:37,507
MY SOCIAL LIFE IS ON FIRE.
315
00:15:39,269 --> 00:15:42,412
HERE. I GOT YOU ROACH TRAPS
AND FLIP FLOPS.
316
00:15:43,513 --> 00:15:46,316
MAX, WHAT´S HE
TALKING ABOUT?
317
00:15:46,316 --> 00:15:48,318
GRANDMA THREW ME
A BIRTHDAY PARTY
318
00:15:48,318 --> 00:15:50,150
SO I COULD GET PRESENTS.
319
00:15:50,150 --> 00:15:53,123
MAX!
320
00:15:53,123 --> 00:15:56,686
YOU FAKED YOUR BIRTHDAY?
321
00:15:56,686 --> 00:15:59,329
AND YOU ARRANGED IT?
322
00:15:59,329 --> 00:16:02,262
ANGIE, I SWEAR
ON MY SON´S LIFE --
323
00:16:02,262 --> 00:16:05,365
I GOT HERE LATE,
I HAD NO IDEA THIS WAS GOING ON.
324
00:16:05,365 --> 00:16:08,368
I AM AS SHOCKED AS YOU.
325
00:16:08,368 --> 00:16:13,173
BENNY, I COUNTED ON YOU.
THERE HAS TO BE AN ADULT HERE.
326
00:16:13,173 --> 00:16:16,546
ABSOLUTELY.
NEXT TIME.
327
00:16:16,546 --> 00:16:18,508
YOU ARE GROUNDED!
328
00:16:18,508 --> 00:16:21,051
AND YOU´RE GONNA
RETURN ALL THE GIFTS YOU GOT.
MOM --
329
00:16:21,051 --> 00:16:22,752
THAT´S NOT ALL.
330
00:16:22,752 --> 00:16:25,655
YOU´RE GONNA GIVE EACH OF THESE
KIDS A TOY OF YOURS IN RETURN.
331
00:16:25,655 --> 00:16:28,588
NOW, BEFORE I TAKE HIM HOME,
APOLOGIZE.
332
00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:33,993
I´M SORRY, DAVE.
HERE´S ONE OF MY TOYS.
333
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,596
NOW, WHY AM I BEING
PUNISHED?
334
00:16:52,742 --> 00:16:59,018
OYE, CHICA, SAY HELLO
TO YOUR LITTLE FRIEND.
335
00:16:59,389 --> 00:17:01,151
HOW WAS THE TRIP?
GREAT.
336
00:17:01,151 --> 00:17:03,523
AND I PICKED UP
A LITTLE ANNIVERSARY PRESENT
337
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:06,196
OUTSIDE OF MIAMI.
338
00:17:06,196 --> 00:17:08,498
YOU WEREN´T SUPPOSED TO SPEND
ANY MONEY.
339
00:17:08,498 --> 00:17:09,529
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
340
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:11,331
I -- WHAT?
CLOSE YOUR EYES.
341
00:17:11,331 --> 00:17:12,732
OKAY.
342
00:17:12,732 --> 00:17:15,235
KEEP THEM CLOSED.
ALL RIGHT.
343
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,342
George:
OKAY. OPEN THEM.
344
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:29,519
MY LITTLE ANGIE, LOOK AT YOU,
ALL GROWN UP.
345
00:17:29,519 --> 00:17:32,152
MY GOD, UNCLE OCTAVIO.
346
00:17:32,152 --> 00:17:35,585
ANGIE, CASTRO WASN´T GOING TO
LET HIM LEAVE CUBA.
347
00:17:35,585 --> 00:17:37,627
I LOST ALL HOPE OF COMING.
348
00:17:37,627 --> 00:17:39,559
BUT THIS BRAVE MAN
AND YOUR FATHER
349
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,491
WENT INTO THE OCEAN
TO GET ME.
350
00:17:41,491 --> 00:17:43,263
THEY WERE A LITTLE LATE
351
00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:45,595
AND WE HAD TO OUTRUN
THE COAST GUARD.
352
00:17:45,595 --> 00:17:48,498
YOU´RE KILLING
THE MOMENT.
353
00:17:48,498 --> 00:17:51,401
OH, MY GOD, GEORGE,
THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING THING
354
00:17:51,401 --> 00:17:53,673
ANYONE´S EVER DONE FOR ME.
355
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:55,275
Vic:
COME ON, OCTAVIO.
356
00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,647
LET´S TAKE YOUR STUFF
UPSTAIRS.
357
00:17:57,647 --> 00:18:00,410
TOMORROW, WE´LL GO
TO A SUPERMARKET,
358
00:18:00,410 --> 00:18:04,684
AND I´LL SHOW YOU PEANUT BUTTER
AND JELLY IN THE SAME JAR.
359
00:18:04,684 --> 00:18:07,187
WHAT IS PEANUT BUTTER?
360
00:18:07,187 --> 00:18:10,420
WHAT IS TOOTHPASTE
THAT WHITENS AND BRIGHTENS?
361
00:18:10,420 --> 00:18:15,165
WHAT IS HOT DOG
WITH CHEESE ALREADY INSIDE IT?
362
00:18:15,165 --> 00:18:20,200
THAT, MI HERMANO,
IS THE SWEET TASTE OF FREEDOM.
363
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:29,339
I´M BLOWN AWAY.
I DON´T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
364
00:18:29,339 --> 00:18:30,880
DON´T SAY ANYTHING.
365
00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:33,643
I´M SURE YOU GOT ME SOMETHING
JUST AS SPECIAL.
366
00:18:41,851 --> 00:18:43,653
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY.
367
00:18:43,653 --> 00:18:46,125
WHAT´S THIS?
368
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:48,728
I MADE YOU A MIX TAPE
FROM THE YEAR WE MET.
369
00:18:48,728 --> 00:18:51,761
SO I FLEW
ACROSS THE COUNTRY,
370
00:18:51,761 --> 00:18:54,734
RISKED MY LIFE
ON THE OCEAN,
371
00:18:54,734 --> 00:18:56,706
AND YOU GIVE ME
A TAPE WITH...
372
00:18:56,706 --> 00:19:01,211
"WAKE ME UP
BEFORE YOU GO-GO"?
373
00:19:01,211 --> 00:19:04,344
I´M SORRY.
374
00:19:04,344 --> 00:19:05,675
I LOVE IT.
375
00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:11,421
HERE´S YOUR REAL GIFT.
376
00:19:11,421 --> 00:19:13,453
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, BABY.
377
00:19:21,591 --> 00:19:23,463
WHAT IS THIS?
378
00:19:23,463 --> 00:19:25,295
I MADE IT.
379
00:19:27,497 --> 00:19:29,239
WHAT ABOUT OCTAVIO?
380
00:19:29,239 --> 00:19:33,273
OH, ANGIE, HE´S FAMILY.
I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT ANYWAY.
381
00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:36,306
OH, GEORGE.
382
00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:40,610
I LOVE IT.
383
00:19:40,610 --> 00:19:43,713
IT´S LOPSIDED...
384
00:19:43,713 --> 00:19:45,685
IT´S DENTED.
385
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,717
IT LOOKS LIKE
A 3-YEAR-OLD DID IT.
386
00:19:49,289 --> 00:19:53,963
I LOVE THAT IT CAME
FROM YOUR HEART.
387
00:19:53,963 --> 00:19:57,196
IT SUCKS, BUT IT´S STILL
BETTER THAN A MIX TAPE.
388
00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:58,928
HEY!
389
00:20:03,273 --> 00:20:06,706
YOU KNOW,
IF CASTRO WERE HERE RIGHT NOW,
390
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:08,678
I WOULD TAKE
AN OLD RUSTY RAZOR,
391
00:20:08,678 --> 00:20:12,742
SHAVE THAT BEARD OFF AND POUR
VINEGAR ALL OVER HIS FACE.
392
00:20:12,742 --> 00:20:14,684
OOH, THE STINGING.
393
00:20:14,684 --> 00:20:18,588
IF CASTRO WERE HERE
RIGHT NOW,
394
00:20:18,588 --> 00:20:22,592
I WOULD TRAIN A PACK OF DOGS
JUST TO ATTACK CIGARS.
395
00:20:22,592 --> 00:20:26,826
THEN WHEN HE STARTED SMOKING,
THEY WOULD DESTROY HIS FACE.
396
00:20:26,826 --> 00:20:29,829
IF HE WERE HERE RIGHT NOW,
397
00:20:29,829 --> 00:20:32,532
I WOULD RIP HIS HEAD OFF
WITH MY BARE HANDS
398
00:20:32,532 --> 00:20:33,833
AND PUT IT ON BACKWARDS,
399
00:20:33,833 --> 00:20:36,636
SO THAT HE WOULD HAVE
TO LOOK AT HIS OWN BUTT
400
00:20:36,636 --> 00:20:38,368
WHILE I KICKED IT.
401
00:20:39,839 --> 00:20:42,572
IT´S GO TIME!
27889
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