All language subtitles for Myra Breckinridge (1970)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:56,100 --> 00:01:00,100 www.titlovi.com 2 00:01:03,100 --> 00:01:06,050 � I've got a secret place � 3 00:01:06,250 --> 00:01:08,650 � Known to none but me � 4 00:01:08,850 --> 00:01:11,050 � And in my secret place � 5 00:01:11,250 --> 00:01:14,350 �You can beg and torture me � 6 00:01:14,550 --> 00:01:16,800 � I wouldn't tell you where to go � 7 00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:21,350 � 'Cause in my secret place,� 8 00:01:21,550 --> 00:01:25,000 � A secret place A secret you know � 9 00:01:27,700 --> 00:01:31,500 � A secret place A secret you know �� 10 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:26,250 You realize once we cut it off, it won't grow back? 11 00:02:26,450 --> 00:02:29,150 It isn't like hair or fingernails or toenails, you know. 12 00:02:29,350 --> 00:02:32,600 What do you think I am, some kind of idiot? I know that. 13 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:45,000 How about circumcision? 14 00:02:45,950 --> 00:02:47,950 It'd be cheaper. 15 00:02:48,150 --> 00:02:51,300 Come on, come on, come on. Let's get it over with. Myra's waiting. 16 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,900 We'll have to blow up your tits with silicone. 17 00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:09,750 I thought they used paraffin. -No, that would make them inflammable. 18 00:03:09,950 --> 00:03:12,350 You don't want inflammable tits, now, do you? 19 00:03:12,550 --> 00:03:16,150 � I got a secret place � 20 00:03:16,350 --> 00:03:18,550 � Known to none but me � -Cleaver... 21 00:03:18,750 --> 00:03:20,550 I mean, scalpel. -And in my secret. 22 00:03:20,750 --> 00:03:23,200 Well, I should think so. 23 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:31,100 Well, wish me luck. I've never clone one of these before. 24 00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:36,600 ;You can beg and torture me �� 25 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:53,750 You know American song? 26 00:03:53,950 --> 00:03:57,600 Yes, I do. It's called “You Gotta S-M-l-L-E.“ 27 00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:15,450 I am Myra Breckinridge, whom no man will ever possess... 28 00:07:15,650 --> 00:07:17,650 the new woman whose astonishing history... 29 00:07:17,850 --> 00:07:19,650 started with a surgeon's scalpel... 30 00:07:19,850 --> 00:07:22,400 and will end who knows where? 31 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,750 lust as Eve was born from Adam's rib... 32 00:07:26,950 --> 00:07:29,300 so Myron died to give birth to Myra. 33 00:07:32,900 --> 00:07:35,650 “Did Myron take his own life?" you will ask. 34 00:07:35,850 --> 00:07:38,650 Yes and no is my answer. 35 00:07:38,850 --> 00:07:41,200 Beyond that my lips are sealed. 36 00:07:42,700 --> 00:07:48,550 Let's it suffice for me to say that Myron is with me... 37 00:07:48,750 --> 00:07:52,100 and that I am the fulfillment of all his dreams. 38 00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:57,900 Who is Myra Breckinridge? What is she? 39 00:07:59,950 --> 00:08:01,950 Myra Breckinridge is a dish. 40 00:08:02,150 --> 00:08:05,250 And don't you ever forget it, you... fuckers... 41 00:08:05,450 --> 00:08:08,100 as the children say nowadays. 42 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:13,000 Don't mother me. 43 00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:17,800 It seems to be coming this way. 44 00:08:25,050 --> 00:08:27,050 My purpose in coming to Hollywood... 45 00:08:27,250 --> 00:08:30,650 is the destruction of the American male in all its particulars... 46 00:08:30,850 --> 00:08:32,650 starting with my late husbands uncle... 47 00:08:32,850 --> 00:08:36,350 the notorious Buck Loner, who squats in unashamed luxury... 48 00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:40,500 as the head of a dramatic school in fashionable Westwood. 49 00:08:43,300 --> 00:08:45,300 A tree! 50 00:08:45,500 --> 00:08:50,850 An actor can learn from everything, including a tree. 51 00:08:51,050 --> 00:08:55,050 You must learn to experience the truth of a tree... 52 00:08:55,250 --> 00:09:00,150 to make it work for you, to use it, to know its beauty. 53 00:09:00,350 --> 00:09:03,600 This tree, goddamn it! 54 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:10,800 “Ah, Myra baby, " I say to myself... 55 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,700 “half of all of this will soon be yours. " 56 00:09:19,700 --> 00:09:23,150 Howdy Doody. Come right on in, little lady. 57 00:09:23,350 --> 00:09:25,150 Take the weight off them pretty little feet... 58 00:09:25,350 --> 00:09:27,650 while I finish my last mile back to the old corral. 59 00:09:27,850 --> 00:09:31,750 So, you wanna be a star? Mmm. 60 00:09:31,950 --> 00:09:35,850 It's a hard road. And I feel I should say, “No, siree. “ 61 00:09:36,050 --> 00:09:41,450 But somethin'... somethin' about you tells me I should give you a chance. 62 00:09:41,650 --> 00:09:45,950 What do you say? Can you take the heartache and the torture... 63 00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:49,450 and the heat of them five-kilowatt lamps over at MGM? 64 00:09:49,650 --> 00:09:52,250 From where I sit, I'd say you can. 65 00:09:52,450 --> 00:09:55,850 I can see your name in lights now. 66 00:09:56,050 --> 00:10:00,250 Fact is, you remind me of one of our former successful students, a Miss Gloria Swanson. 67 00:10:00,450 --> 00:10:04,050 You've heard the name, I 'm sure. -She was one of your students? 68 00:10:04,250 --> 00:10:06,650 You bet your sweet ass. 69 00:10:06,850 --> 00:10:09,450 My students is always sayin', “Uncle Buck, if it weren't for you... 70 00:10:09,650 --> 00:10:12,150 we'd still be warmin' that seat back in Schwab's Drugstore. “ 71 00:10:12,350 --> 00:10:16,050 Really? I thought that was where Lana Turner was discovered. 72 00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:20,000 Her too. Her too. Well, I'll be goldurned. 73 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,550 You really done your homework. Yes, little lady... 74 00:10:23,750 --> 00:10:26,250 Lana Turner put her sweet little fanny right where you're sitting now. 75 00:10:26,450 --> 00:10:29,450 Lana, “ I says, “what say we put you in a sweater and make a movie?“ 76 00:10:29,650 --> 00:10:32,750 And we did. 77 00:10:32,950 --> 00:10:35,650 What's your name honey? -Myra Breckinridge. 78 00:10:35,850 --> 00:10:39,600 That's a might long for... 79 00:10:44,100 --> 00:10:47,850 Breckinridge? 80 00:10:48,050 --> 00:10:51,350 Yes. I'm the widow of your late nephew Myron... 81 00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:53,550 and I've come to collect a half a million dollars. 82 00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:11,850 You mean Gertrude's boy is dead? -Irretrievably. 83 00:11:12,050 --> 00:11:14,550 I'm right sorry to hear that. -Here. 84 00:11:14,750 --> 00:11:19,850 I never knew Gertrude's boy had such an eye for feminine pulchritude. 85 00:11:20,050 --> 00:11:25,150 Oh, Mr. Loner, you're the only one I have left to turn to. 86 00:11:25,350 --> 00:11:29,200 You see, Myron didn't leave me a penny. 87 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,450 Um, no insurance? 88 00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:33,850 Safety-deposit box, maybe? 89 00:11:34,050 --> 00:11:38,850 No. I'm absolutely alone... 90 00:11:39,050 --> 00:11:42,450 and penniless. 91 00:11:42,650 --> 00:11:44,550 Mr. Loner... 92 00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:49,650 Gertrude... Myron's mother... said to me with her dying breath... 93 00:11:49,850 --> 00:11:53,950 “Myron, and you too, angel girl, if anything should ever happen to me... 94 00:11:54,150 --> 00:11:57,550 you just go to your Uncle Buck, and you tell that son of a bitch...“ 95 00:11:57,750 --> 00:11:59,850 well, I 'm quoting now verbatim... 96 00:12:00,050 --> 00:12:04,450 “that that property in Westwood was left to us jointly by our father. 97 00:12:04,650 --> 00:12:09,250 And you tell that bastard... that I've got a copy of that will... 98 00:12:09,450 --> 00:12:12,050 and I want my share to go to you, Myron... 99 00:12:12,250 --> 00:12:15,550 because that property must be worth a good million dollars by now. “ 100 00:12:15,750 --> 00:12:17,950 Well, how about that? 101 00:12:18,150 --> 00:12:21,450 I conclude he left a last will and testament? 102 00:12:21,650 --> 00:12:25,150 Yes, leaving the whole of his estate to me. 103 00:12:25,350 --> 00:12:28,350 So, I suppose that half this place must be mine. 104 00:12:28,550 --> 00:12:33,250 Um, well, you know somethin', Myra? The school ain't doin' too good. 105 00:12:33,450 --> 00:12:37,250 We can see it through together, Uncle Buck, why, as partners. 106 00:12:37,450 --> 00:12:42,750 Partners? Uh, now, look, Myra, I'm pleased as all get out you come to cry on my shoulder... 107 00:12:42,950 --> 00:12:46,150 seeing as life's kicked you in the horse trough, and blood's thicker than sarsaparilla... 108 00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,550 but I don't need no partners. 109 00:12:48,750 --> 00:12:53,050 The price for my share has just gone up another $ 700.000. 110 00:12:53,250 --> 00:12:56,650 I'm sorry, Uncle, but I expected more from the star of Wild Bill Last Roundup... 111 00:12:56,850 --> 00:13:00,450 and Cuckoo Calls in the Everglades, but it seems I was wrong. 112 00:13:00,650 --> 00:13:02,850 Perhaps my lawyers will speak a tongue you'll comprehend. 113 00:13:03,050 --> 00:13:06,550 Myra, Myra, Myra! What a spit-lickin' horny toad I'd be... 114 00:13:06,750 --> 00:13:11,200 to let you walk out of here without makin' some contribution to the family pork 'n' beans. 115 00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:13,250 What kind of a contribution? 116 00:13:13,450 --> 00:13:15,750 All this talk about lawyers and settlements... 117 00:13:15,950 --> 00:13:18,550 and wills and testaments goes clean over my head... 118 00:13:18,750 --> 00:13:20,550 our bein' kissin' kin and all. 119 00:13:20,750 --> 00:13:24,650 Well, I'd be overjoyed if you'd share my vittles... 120 00:13:24,850 --> 00:13:26,650 and break bread with my wife, Bobby Dean, and me. 121 00:13:26,850 --> 00:13:30,350 Only thing, she, uh, poisoned herself on some homemade guacamole... 122 00:13:30,550 --> 00:13:32,750 and she's laid up, like, fora month or two. 123 00:13:32,950 --> 00:13:36,250 I can tell there's Breckinridge blood flowin' in them veins. 124 00:13:36,450 --> 00:13:40,300 Do you think I'd throw the widow of Gertrude's boy out in the clog patch? 125 00:13:43,700 --> 00:13:46,250 I am prepared to accept a position here on the faculty. 126 00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:49,150 I took the liberty of picking up a brochure on the way in. 127 00:13:49,350 --> 00:13:52,850 Posture and empathy should do nicely. I'm eminently qualified to teach both. 128 00:13:53,050 --> 00:13:56,350 Say a thousand a month. -Uh, posture and empathy... 129 00:13:56,550 --> 00:14:00,300 is a subject the students badly need at 800 a month. 130 00:14:01,650 --> 00:14:03,650 A thousand... 131 00:14:03,850 --> 00:14:06,350 only on condition you don't tell the other teachers how much you're gettin'. 132 00:14:06,550 --> 00:14:08,950 You have my word, Uncle. -"Uncle"? 133 00:14:09,150 --> 00:14:11,150 Uh, we're busy, Irving. 134 00:14:13,750 --> 00:14:15,750 Is this your new masseuse? 135 00:14:15,950 --> 00:14:18,650 My niece, Miss Myra Breckinridge, who'll be teaching empathy and posture. 136 00:14:18,850 --> 00:14:21,850 Delicious! How much you getting? 137 00:14:22,050 --> 00:14:24,450 A thousand a month. -I know. It's shocking, isn't it? 138 00:14:24,650 --> 00:14:29,850 Still, we all love it here. Nobody ever leaves. I've been here for 14 years. 139 00:14:30,050 --> 00:14:33,250 What do you teach? -I don't teach. I'm a student. 140 00:14:33,450 --> 00:14:37,650 Teachers last as long as Brillo pads, and students stay on forever and ever. 141 00:14:37,850 --> 00:14:40,650 We try to build up the confidence of the students so they don't wanna leave. 142 00:14:40,850 --> 00:14:42,850 That right? That don't sound right. 143 00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:45,550 Of course. Who'd wanna leave where he's happy? 144 00:14:45,750 --> 00:14:48,250 Yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's right. 145 00:14:48,450 --> 00:14:50,500 That's terrible! -Hold your horses, Myra. 146 00:14:50,700 --> 00:14:53,350 I'm taking into account her recent and most tragic loss. 147 00:14:53,550 --> 00:14:55,350 What did you lose, dear? -Her husband. 148 00:14:55,550 --> 00:14:57,350 Careless. 149 00:14:57,550 --> 00:15:01,350 Irving, I 'm sure Miss Myra would appreciate a tour around the old corral. 150 00:15:01,550 --> 00:15:04,050 Who dat? -I'd ride with you, partner... 151 00:15:04,250 --> 00:15:06,550 except my chiropractor's clue in to fix my back. 152 00:15:06,750 --> 00:15:08,550 Oh, what's wrong with your back? ls it fatal? 153 00:15:08,750 --> 00:15:13,150 You sure got a sense of humor, Myra. You ought to take it up professionally. 154 00:15:13,350 --> 00:15:16,200 I bet around the country there's lots of openings for your style of humor. 155 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,150 ...homometic pantomime... 156 00:15:43,350 --> 00:15:47,050 in which he saw straight through the strenuous clowning to the hard fact... 157 00:15:47,250 --> 00:15:51,250 that American women are eager for men to rape them and vice versa... 158 00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:56,350 and that in every American, there is a strangler longing to break a neck during orgasm. 159 00:15:56,550 --> 00:15:58,950 What in hell is that woman talkin' about? 160 00:15:59,150 --> 00:16:02,550 During the decade between 1935 and 1945... 161 00:16:02,750 --> 00:16:06,750 no unimportant film was made in the United States. 162 00:16:06,950 --> 00:16:10,150 During those years, the entire range of human... 163 00:16:10,350 --> 00:16:13,150 which is to say American, legend was put on film. 164 00:16:13,350 --> 00:16:16,750 Remind me to have my masseuse come in at 5:00 instead of 6:00... 165 00:16:16,950 --> 00:16:20,700 as I'm gettin' horny watchin' my niece on TV. 166 00:16:41,050 --> 00:16:43,050 ...leave this place and go into the real world? 167 00:16:43,250 --> 00:16:46,650 Oh, some of them leave, sure. They have to get money to pay the fees. 168 00:16:46,850 --> 00:16:49,350 It's very expensive. 169 00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:51,950 Is your name really Irving? -Irving Amadeus. 170 00:16:52,150 --> 00:16:54,850 That's a Jewish name, isn't it? -Yes, I know. 171 00:16:55,050 --> 00:16:57,950 I used to be Jewish before I was transmogrified. 172 00:16:58,150 --> 00:17:02,300 Now I just eat nuts and raisins and play Scrabble with my guru. 173 00:17:02,500 --> 00:17:05,950 ...to today's class on cinema lovemaking. 174 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:09,000 On balling. 175 00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:12,950 Just take off your clothes and get in bed, dear. 176 00:17:13,150 --> 00:17:16,450 Now we need a ballsy young man for the lover. 177 00:17:16,650 --> 00:17:18,750 Come on. 178 00:17:18,950 --> 00:17:21,750 And you are irate. You're bugged. 179 00:17:21,950 --> 00:17:24,750 You think that she is the lowest slut, the worst. 180 00:17:24,950 --> 00:17:27,850 You also want to, uh, get in bed with her. 181 00:17:28,050 --> 00:17:30,750 You hold these here. You look into his eyes and say... 182 00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:35,100 “No, it's all your imagination. I've never been to bed with any man. You're on drugs. “ 183 00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:39,550 How could you do this to me, you bitch? - lt's all your imagination. 184 00:17:39,750 --> 00:17:42,550 That's very good. 185 00:17:42,750 --> 00:17:45,600 Maybe we should... -Congratulations, Lance. 186 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:02,750 ...here at the academy are not interested in... 187 00:18:02,950 --> 00:18:06,350 teaching the students to be successful. 188 00:18:06,550 --> 00:18:09,750 We feel that it's our responsibility to... 189 00:18:09,950 --> 00:18:11,950 But you're a fag, aren't you? 190 00:18:13,700 --> 00:18:17,350 Well, uh... What do you... 191 00:18:17,550 --> 00:18:20,050 I don't know. I mean, in the Baha'i faith... 192 00:18:20,250 --> 00:18:22,950 You see, Uncle Buck is convinced that group therapy and self-criticism... 193 00:18:23,150 --> 00:18:25,050 are the keys to successful acting. 194 00:18:25,250 --> 00:18:27,550 Personally, I think if everybody ate macrobiotic foods... 195 00:18:27,750 --> 00:18:29,550 there'd be no more wars. -Bitch! 196 00:18:29,750 --> 00:18:31,650 I should've put it to her when she first come in... 197 00:18:31,850 --> 00:18:35,050 throwed her on her back and give her the old Buck Loner special right there on the rug. 198 00:18:35,250 --> 00:18:38,250 Goddamn smart-mouthed broad! 199 00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,250 Memo to Flager and Flager, attorneys. 200 00:18:40,450 --> 00:18:44,500 Dear Charlie- Hmm, honey, that feels real good. 201 00:18:44,700 --> 00:18:47,100 Uh, cut that. Dear Charlie... 202 00:18:47,300 --> 00:18:49,250 a problem's come up on which I need your thinkin'. 203 00:18:49,450 --> 00:18:55,150 Mm-hmm! A woman showed up today who says she is the widow to my nephew Myron. 204 00:18:55,350 --> 00:18:58,450 Now, this woman claims she has a right to half my property... 205 00:18:58,650 --> 00:19:01,050 which did at one time belong to my sister Gertrude and me... 206 00:19:01,250 --> 00:19:05,050 but is now mine, all mine, if there's any justice in this world. 207 00:19:05,250 --> 00:19:09,150 Now, Charlie, it's up to you to see I get the best justice money can buy. 208 00:19:09,350 --> 00:19:13,600 Honey, that is simply wonderful. Hmm! Strike that. 209 00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:15,350 Not me. Flager. 210 00:19:15,550 --> 00:19:19,900 Let's go inside and watch some of the fundamentals of acting class. 211 00:19:24,900 --> 00:19:29,050 He's dirty and greasy, and I can? stand him! 212 00:19:29,250 --> 00:19:32,350 He's always hitting on me in rehearsals and grabbing and groping me. 213 00:19:32,550 --> 00:19:35,850 I want you to build the vibe between you... 214 00:19:36,050 --> 00:19:40,950 by closing your eyes and touching each other. 215 00:19:41,150 --> 00:19:43,350 I can't stand to have this creep touch me! 216 00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:45,950 Now we're getting someplace. 217 00:19:46,150 --> 00:19:48,800 Real honesty for the first time. 218 00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:36,350 What are you going to teach us? 219 00:20:36,550 --> 00:20:39,750 Well, I've come to bring back star quality. 220 00:20:39,950 --> 00:20:45,050 You simply must understand that that pseudoanalytical group therapy approach to acting... 221 00:20:45,250 --> 00:20:47,750 may be all right for naturalistic theater... 222 00:20:47,950 --> 00:20:51,250 a quaint, amiable convention with little or no significance... 223 00:20:51,450 --> 00:20:53,250 but it has little to do with... -What? 224 00:20:53,450 --> 00:20:56,350 In my posture class, I was particularly struck... 225 00:20:56,550 --> 00:20:59,550 by one of the students, a boy with a Polish name. 226 00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:03,450 From a certain unevenly rounded thickness at the crotch of his blue jeans... 227 00:21:03,650 --> 00:21:08,250 it is 522% to assume that he is marvelously hung. 228 00:21:08,450 --> 00:21:12,850 Unfortunately, he's hot for an extremely pretty girl with long blonde hair. 229 00:21:13,050 --> 00:21:16,150 Dyed. Beautiful legs and breasts. 230 00:21:16,350 --> 00:21:18,150 Reminiscent of Lupe Velez. 231 00:21:18,350 --> 00:21:20,650 She is mentally retarded. 232 00:21:20,850 --> 00:21:25,950 He is probably just as stupid, but fortunately, has the good sense not to talk too much. 233 00:21:26,150 --> 00:21:30,550 When he does, however, he puts on a hillbilly accent that is so authentic... 234 00:21:30,750 --> 00:21:32,950 that I almost melt in my drawers. 235 00:21:33,150 --> 00:21:37,150 I didn't understand a word you said, but whatever it was, I'm right with you. 236 00:21:37,350 --> 00:21:39,450 I'm certain that regular attendance in my classes... 237 00:21:39,650 --> 00:21:42,950 will help even the most limited intelligence. 238 00:21:43,150 --> 00:21:46,150 Wait a minute. What you mean by “limited intelligence“? 239 00:21:46,350 --> 00:21:48,350 Myra, when you say that the cinema is- 240 00:21:48,550 --> 00:21:53,350 Howdy, kids! Howdy! -Such a lovely man. A lovely man. 241 00:21:53,550 --> 00:21:56,850 I see you've all met Myra. 242 00:21:57,050 --> 00:21:59,150 How'; the boy Rusty? -Great, Uncle Buck, just great. 243 00:21:59,350 --> 00:22:01,750 Ah! Well. how's the workouts comin'? 244 00:22:01,950 --> 00:22:06,150 Great. I've been concentratin' on my lats lately, and they're comin' along real nice. 245 00:22:06,350 --> 00:22:08,950 Give us a flex, why don't you? -Get it on, baby. 246 00:22:09,150 --> 00:22:11,950 Come on! A quickie. 247 00:22:12,150 --> 00:22:14,250 Oh, wow, look at that, man! -Oh, my goodness! 248 00:22:14,450 --> 00:22:16,950 I've never seen anything like that in all my life. -Great! 249 00:22:17,150 --> 00:22:20,650 Beautiful. -Great! Just great, great, great! 250 00:22:20,850 --> 00:22:23,850 Great bunch of boys here. Of course, you get the occasional weirdo. 251 00:22:24,050 --> 00:22:26,750 But greatest bunch of kids in Hollywood. -Bread? 252 00:22:26,950 --> 00:22:28,750 I'm certain of that. The drivel in their heads... 253 00:22:28,950 --> 00:22:30,950 must've been patiently instilled by the faculty. 254 00:22:31,150 --> 00:22:34,850 Wait a minute. The faculty may be a bunch of Commies and fags... 255 00:22:35,050 --> 00:22:38,850 no offense, lrving... but they're all eminently qualified. 256 00:22:39,050 --> 00:22:40,850 Yes, as a dance act for the Menninger Clinic... 257 00:22:41,050 --> 00:22:43,150 but their collective knowledge could be inscribed on... 258 00:22:43,350 --> 00:22:46,050 I hope to see you all in class... on the head of a pin. 259 00:22:46,250 --> 00:22:49,500 She's, um... She's from New York. 260 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:54,050 Myra! Myra! 261 00:22:54,250 --> 00:22:56,650 Myra, I can't have you talking like that in front of the kids. 262 00:22:56,850 --> 00:22:58,750 It'll shake their faith in the school. 263 00:22:58,950 --> 00:23:02,350 Nothing could shake the simple faith these deluded bunnies have in you, Uncle Buck. 264 00:23:02,550 --> 00:23:04,600 I can't relate to her! 265 00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:06,650 You don't want to make it with her, do you? 266 00:23:06,850 --> 00:23:10,550 Forget it. You don't have to worry about her. She turns me off completely. 267 00:23:10,750 --> 00:23:14,050 I don't want to make any charges. It may not be a conspiracy at all. 268 00:23:14,250 --> 00:23:17,150 Conspiracy? I should've known. Every one of them is some kind of lefty. 269 00:23:17,350 --> 00:23:20,450 I mean, man, I never heard anybody rap like that, man. 270 00:23:20,650 --> 00:23:23,850 I mean, she just got right into it, man, and rapped. 271 00:23:24,050 --> 00:23:27,250 I don't know. She's weird, you know? 272 00:23:27,450 --> 00:23:30,050 I mean, I like her, but she's weird. 273 00:23:30,250 --> 00:23:34,450 I bet a couple of sessions in the old exercise program would straighten her out pretty good. 274 00:23:34,650 --> 00:23:38,600 Old Buck Loner special would shape her up real good. God knows she wants it. 275 00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:41,200 Well, 276 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,750 If it's all the same to you... 277 00:23:43,950 --> 00:23:45,950 I'll go and finish my makeup. 278 00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:06,900 Miss Van Allen is on her way up. 279 00:24:18,100 --> 00:24:21,500 I'll be right with you, boys. Get your resumés out. 280 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,350 Mmm. Got a big mob. 281 00:24:27,550 --> 00:24:31,000 I'm a little tired today. One of those guys will have to go. 282 00:24:40,100 --> 00:24:42,950 Well, there are four or five with brown suits. 283 00:24:43,150 --> 00:24:45,450 Oh, the brass buttons. Yes, I see. 284 00:24:45,650 --> 00:24:48,100 Uh, she'll see you. Yes, you. 285 00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,300 Mmm, yeah. 286 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:09,850 You think a squealer can get away from me? 287 00:25:10,050 --> 00:25:12,550 Huh? 288 00:25:12,750 --> 00:25:15,750 You know what I do to squealers? 289 00:25:15,950 --> 00:25:17,750 I let 'em have it in the belly. 290 00:25:17,950 --> 00:25:21,500 Well, I don't care about your credits as long as you're oversexed. 291 00:25:21,700 --> 00:25:25,050 Oh, that's one of my credits. 292 00:25:25,250 --> 00:25:27,250 A bed. 293 00:25:27,450 --> 00:25:29,450 I never did see a bed in an office before. 294 00:25:29,650 --> 00:25:33,700 Well, you see, I do a lot of night work sometimes. 295 00:25:35,300 --> 00:25:38,100 Come here. 296 00:25:41,900 --> 00:25:43,900 Mmm. 297 00:25:45,900 --> 00:25:50,550 Don't work any harder than you have to for these blues. 298 00:25:50,750 --> 00:25:53,000 I won't. 299 00:26:04,500 --> 00:26:07,450 How's this? -Perfect. 300 00:26:07,650 --> 00:26:09,450 You impress me immensely. 301 00:26:09,650 --> 00:26:12,450 I'll keep you in mind as a summer replacement. 302 00:26:12,650 --> 00:26:14,650 Next. 303 00:26:31,100 --> 00:26:33,850 Well, the end of another busy day. 304 00:26:34,050 --> 00:26:35,950 I can't wait till I get back to bed. 305 00:26:36,150 --> 00:26:38,950 If that don? work, I'll try and sleep. 306 00:26:39,150 --> 00:26:42,050 Mmm. Hi, cowboy. 307 00:26:42,250 --> 00:26:44,950 How tall are you without your horse? 308 00:26:45,150 --> 00:26:47,750 Well, ma'am, I'm six feet, seven inches. 309 00:26:47,950 --> 00:26:49,750 Well, 310 00:26:49,950 --> 00:26:52,450 Never mind about the six feet. 311 00:26:52,650 --> 00:26:55,400 Let's talk about the seven inches. 312 00:27:25,100 --> 00:27:29,350 Those were the days. Spike Jones and his City Slickers... 313 00:27:29,550 --> 00:27:32,450 Ina Ray Hutton and Her All-girl Band... 314 00:27:32,650 --> 00:27:34,750 and, of course, the Andrews Sisters. 315 00:27:34,950 --> 00:27:37,800 Well, there'll never be anyone like them. 316 00:27:38,900 --> 00:27:41,750 The decline in our music saddens me... 317 00:27:41,950 --> 00:27:44,450 nearly as much as the decline in our films. 318 00:27:44,650 --> 00:27:47,100 I have never heard of any of these people. 319 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:50,650 But my dear, they were unique. 320 00:27:50,850 --> 00:27:52,650 Truly mythic. 321 00:27:52,850 --> 00:27:56,450 Why, the Andrews Sisters really did roll out that barrel... 322 00:27:56,650 --> 00:27:59,450 and no one yet has ever rolled it back. 323 00:27:59,650 --> 00:28:03,250 Do you know, Mary Ann, that if you worked very hard... 324 00:28:03,450 --> 00:28:08,750 it's possible that you might achieve a voice something like that of the late La Verne. 325 00:28:08,950 --> 00:28:10,950 Oh, thank you, Myra. 326 00:28:11,150 --> 00:28:13,600 But I'm just studying at the academy to be with Rusty. 327 00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:17,650 I just wanna get married and settle down. - 328 00:28:17,850 --> 00:28:21,650 To fulfill yourself as a woman, no doubt. 329 00:28:21,850 --> 00:28:25,750 Well, yes. I mean, it's only natural. 330 00:28:25,950 --> 00:28:30,350 Natural? Oh, my dear Mary Ann... 331 00:28:30,550 --> 00:28:32,750 don't you realize that... 332 00:28:32,950 --> 00:28:35,650 Well... 333 00:28:35,850 --> 00:28:37,650 Never mind. 334 00:28:37,850 --> 00:28:39,550 It's getting late. We have a big day tomorrow. 335 00:28:39,750 --> 00:28:41,550 We'll talk about it another time. 336 00:28:41,750 --> 00:28:44,250 Well... -Yes, my dear? 337 00:28:44,450 --> 00:28:46,350 But, um... -Mm-hmm? 338 00:28:46,550 --> 00:28:48,350 But we haven't talked about Rusty. 339 00:28:48,550 --> 00:28:50,350 Oh, that. 340 00:28:50,550 --> 00:28:53,750 Don't you worry your pretty little head. I have that well in hand. 341 00:28:53,950 --> 00:28:55,950 Thank you. Bye-bye. 342 00:28:56,150 --> 00:28:58,150 Bye-bye. 343 00:29:03,300 --> 00:29:05,850 Well! Did you hear her? 344 00:29:06,050 --> 00:29:08,050 Never even heard of the Andrews Sisters. 345 00:29:08,250 --> 00:29:11,450 I scarcely dared mention Ella Mae Morse and the “Cow-Cow Boogie. “ 346 00:29:11,650 --> 00:29:14,350 I Myron] I must say you showed remarkable restraint. 347 00:29:14,550 --> 00:29:17,450 And four children. It's not enough that she and that ape... 348 00:29:17,650 --> 00:29:21,050 merely want to reproduce themselves, she wants to have four! 349 00:29:21,250 --> 00:29:24,650 Half the world is starving now, and if population continues at the present rate... 350 00:29:24,850 --> 00:29:28,950 I know, I know. Famine by 1974. 351 00:29:29,150 --> 00:29:31,250 And you can forget about plankton and seaweed... 352 00:29:31,450 --> 00:29:33,650 because there's not gonna be enough of that to go around. 353 00:29:33,850 --> 00:29:38,100 Oh! I've heard this speech so many times. 354 00:29:39,350 --> 00:29:41,350 Your goal is... 355 00:29:41,550 --> 00:29:45,200 My goal is the destruction of the last vestigial traces of traditional manhood. 356 00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:47,100 In order to... -Realign the sexes... 357 00:29:47,300 --> 00:29:49,400 While... -Decreasing population... 358 00:29:49,600 --> 00:29:51,850 Thus... -Increasing human happiness. 359 00:29:52,050 --> 00:29:56,850 And... -Preparing humanity for its next stage. 360 00:29:57,050 --> 00:30:00,850 Bravo. Also... bullshit. 361 00:30:01,050 --> 00:30:03,550 Would you care to explain that? -Gladly. 362 00:30:03,750 --> 00:30:06,550 I thought we were gonna invite Mary Ann here tonight so that we could talk. 363 00:30:06,750 --> 00:30:09,550 Oh, never mind! 364 00:30:09,750 --> 00:30:13,250 I make all your fantasies come true, and then all you say is I make everything nasty! 365 00:30:13,450 --> 00:30:16,000 Well, I'm doing everything I can! 366 00:30:19,100 --> 00:30:23,450 I'll give you Mary Ann if you want and... Rusty... 367 00:30:23,650 --> 00:30:25,750 and Leticia Van Allen. 368 00:30:25,950 --> 00:30:28,450 The only person I can't deliver is Buck Loner. 369 00:30:28,650 --> 00:30:30,750 He's a real piece of history. 370 00:30:30,950 --> 00:30:34,650 Will you stop it? 371 00:30:34,850 --> 00:30:37,450 Oh, you behave like a real child. 372 00:30:37,650 --> 00:30:40,700 Forgive me. 373 00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:49,800 I just wanna make you happy. 374 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:54,400 That's all. 375 00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:03,950 Myra will take care of everything. 376 00:31:04,150 --> 00:31:06,200 You'll see. 377 00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:26,100 Oh, yes, Myra. 378 00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:29,800 I didn't mean to criticize. 379 00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:35,400 I forgive you. 380 00:31:37,650 --> 00:31:39,650 I forgive you. 381 00:31:39,850 --> 00:31:41,750 Good morning. 382 00:31:41,950 --> 00:31:45,850 I'm your typical sun and fun-loving California sweetheart. 383 00:31:46,050 --> 00:31:51,450 We have here a fine selection of all of your favorite treats. 384 00:31:51,650 --> 00:31:54,050 -“F“ is for French fry. 385 00:31:54,250 --> 00:31:56,850 “P“ is for pizza. -Oh, I'm sorry. 386 00:31:57,050 --> 00:31:58,850 “P“ is for pretzel. 387 00:31:59,050 --> 00:32:01,250 Oh, “A“ is for apple. 388 00:32:01,450 --> 00:32:03,350 I almost forgot. There's me. 389 00:32:03,550 --> 00:32:05,900 Would you like this banana? 390 00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:09,950 And me? 391 00:32:10,150 --> 00:32:12,950 Oh. Open wide. 392 00:32:13,150 --> 00:32:14,950 Isn't that good? 393 00:32:15,150 --> 00:32:16,950 Let me see. 394 00:32:17,150 --> 00:32:18,950 Some peanut butter. 395 00:32:19,150 --> 00:32:22,950 Would you like some peanut butter? With a little jelly? 396 00:32:23,150 --> 00:32:25,200 With some whipped cream? 397 00:32:29,650 --> 00:32:31,650 Mmm! 398 00:32:31,850 --> 00:32:33,800 So good. 399 00:32:34,000 --> 00:32:37,900 “H”is for hot dog. 400 00:32:43,100 --> 00:32:45,450 It's so good! 401 00:32:45,650 --> 00:32:48,200 And a big glass of milk! 402 00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:54,700 Now maybe some chicken. 403 00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:07,100 Johnny Weissmuller, the zaftig Tarzan... 404 00:33:07,300 --> 00:33:11,850 still provides the last word on soft man's relationship to hard environment. 405 00:33:12,050 --> 00:33:17,350 And Tarzan and the Amazons, 1945, he was... -Tarzan and the Amazons? 406 00:33:17,550 --> 00:33:19,450 You mean you like that? 407 00:33:19,650 --> 00:33:21,650 As I've just indicated, it was a masterpiece. 408 00:33:21,850 --> 00:33:25,650 But it's trash. I mean, there isn't a single moment of truth. 409 00:33:25,850 --> 00:33:29,250 I mean, it'; not, uh, real. 410 00:33:29,450 --> 00:33:32,250 Whatever “real“ means. ls that necessarily good? 411 00:33:32,450 --> 00:33:34,550 Could the real Christ have possessed a fraction... 412 00:33:34,750 --> 00:33:39,900 of the radiance of H. B. Warner in the first King of Kings or Jeffrey Hunter in the second? 413 00:33:47,750 --> 00:33:49,750 Heavy, heavy. 414 00:33:49,950 --> 00:33:52,350 At any rate, back to johnny Weissmuller... 415 00:33:52,550 --> 00:33:54,550 who swung out of the trees and into our hearts... 416 00:33:54,750 --> 00:33:57,750 with his leading lady... 417 00:33:57,950 --> 00:34:01,450 Brenda Joyce. -Brenda Joyce. 418 00:34:01,650 --> 00:34:04,750 The only contemporary figure we can point to is James Bond... 419 00:34:04,950 --> 00:34:09,050 who invariably ends up with a blowtorch aimed at his crotch. -Miss Breckinridge. 420 00:34:09,250 --> 00:34:12,150 Ah, Uncle Buck. -May I have a word with you? 421 00:34:12,350 --> 00:34:15,600 I'm in the middle of a class. -It'll only take a minute. 422 00:34:17,900 --> 00:34:20,250 All right. This won't take long. 423 00:34:20,450 --> 00:34:22,650 Miss Breckinridge... 424 00:34:22,850 --> 00:34:26,600 what you're doing here is downright unwholesome, underminin' all my good work. 425 00:34:30,350 --> 00:34:32,350 Do you think lying to people is good for them? 426 00:34:32,550 --> 00:34:36,550 Do you think telling someone who's got cancer he doesn't need the operation is right to do? 427 00:34:36,750 --> 00:34:39,750 Well, if he's had the operation and the case is terminal... 428 00:34:39,950 --> 00:34:41,950 why, you'd want him to be happy, wouldn't ya? 429 00:34:42,150 --> 00:34:45,750 Have the happiest frame of mind? -I can only conclude that you agree. 430 00:34:45,950 --> 00:34:48,900 What you have assembled here are the national dregs, the misfits and neurotics. 431 00:34:49,100 --> 00:34:51,750 In short, the fuck ups of our culture. -That ain't so. 432 00:34:51,950 --> 00:34:55,250 They are the carefully selected candidates for future stardom. 433 00:34:55,450 --> 00:34:58,150 Bullshit! -You can't talk to me like that, young lady. 434 00:34:58,350 --> 00:35:00,150 I'll have you out of here so fast, your hair'll curl. 435 00:35:00,350 --> 00:35:04,350 You just try it, and I'll take this place away from you lock, stock and empathy class! 436 00:35:04,550 --> 00:35:07,650 You watch your step. As for taking this place away from me, why... 437 00:35:07,850 --> 00:35:10,850 I don't even know whether, uh, that man you claimed you married... 438 00:35:11,050 --> 00:35:13,450 that fag son of a bitch... 439 00:35:13,650 --> 00:35:16,000 you was ever even really married to that fag! 440 00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:22,900 That, students, was a classic stage slap delivered so as to give the impression... 441 00:35:23,100 --> 00:35:25,250 that the subject has been hit very hard in the mouth. 442 00:35:25,450 --> 00:35:30,950 It was first developed by Patricia Collinge in The Little Foxes, 1941. 443 00:35:31,150 --> 00:35:34,000 Oh. Thank you for the demonstration, Uncle Buck. 444 00:35:44,900 --> 00:35:48,250 Hello, Miss Van Allen. I thought this was your car. Anything I can do for you? 445 00:35:48,450 --> 00:35:50,350 Come to think of it, yes. 446 00:35:50,550 --> 00:35:53,700 There's a car been following me for quite some time. 447 00:35:53,900 --> 00:35:57,000 Want me to bust him? -No. Introduce him. 448 00:35:57,200 --> 00:36:01,350 Oh, and don't forget to remind me of the policeman's balls... 449 00:36:01,550 --> 00:36:03,550 I mean, the police show. 450 00:36:06,900 --> 00:36:09,350 I wish to see Signorina van Allen. 451 00:36:09,550 --> 00:36:13,450 I have a message for her I bring from Italy. -Your name, please? 452 00:36:13,650 --> 00:36:19,050 Mario Giuseppe Leonardo Guastaferro Stinginate Pastriani. 453 00:36:19,250 --> 00:36:21,250 Have a seat. 454 00:36:37,300 --> 00:36:39,350 I'll be right with you, boys. 455 00:36:39,550 --> 00:36:42,750 There's enough for all of you. jobs, I mean. 456 00:36:42,950 --> 00:36:45,050 Leticia, bellissima. 457 00:36:45,250 --> 00:36:48,450 Well, what do you know? The pizza man. When do you deliver? 458 00:36:48,650 --> 00:36:50,750 Signorina, at last I find you. 459 00:36:50,950 --> 00:36:53,450 Find me? Why, I'm in the Yellow Pages. 460 00:36:53,650 --> 00:36:57,550 Federico Fellini, the great director, tell me to look you up. 461 00:36:57,750 --> 00:37:01,000 Oh, Fellini. Oh, yes. 462 00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,200 He's my friend. 463 00:37:04,750 --> 00:37:06,750 Mmm. 464 00:37:06,950 --> 00:37:09,700 Did he say look me up or eat me up? 465 00:37:11,150 --> 00:37:13,150 No pinching. 466 00:37:13,350 --> 00:37:17,150 Beautiful one, you are the reason I come so far from Italy. 467 00:37:17,350 --> 00:37:19,150 I could not stand it no more. 468 00:37:19,350 --> 00:37:21,650 Ever since I see your pictures... 469 00:37:21,850 --> 00:37:23,650 I hear your record... 470 00:37:23,850 --> 00:37:25,650 lam in love with you. 471 00:37:25,850 --> 00:37:28,950 Hundreds of women have thrown themselves at my feet... 472 00:37:29,150 --> 00:37:31,250 but I love only you. 473 00:37:31,450 --> 00:37:35,550 I am on fire for you. -Oh, I'll put your fire out. 474 00:37:35,750 --> 00:37:38,050 Now, what can I do for you, as if I didn't know? 475 00:37:38,250 --> 00:37:40,250 I don't look for job. 476 00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:44,350 I look for love. -Mmm. 477 00:37:44,550 --> 00:37:47,050 I look for you. To be with you. 478 00:37:47,250 --> 00:37:49,250 To make love with you. 479 00:37:49,450 --> 00:37:52,150 This is too much too soon. 480 00:37:52,350 --> 00:37:55,850 In my country, to wait for love... 481 00:37:56,050 --> 00:37:58,250 is to burn by inches. 482 00:37:58,450 --> 00:38:00,750 Ooh, you've got it all measured out. 483 00:38:00,950 --> 00:38:06,400 When Mario makes love, the bird sing, the bells ring. 484 00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:08,550 And everything swings. 485 00:38:08,750 --> 00:38:11,800 You're the wildest salesman since Columbus. 486 00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:15,850 Columbus, he was a good lover too. 487 00:38:16,050 --> 00:38:19,900 Yeah, I know-a. He raise-a the hell-a with Isabella. 488 00:38:24,300 --> 00:38:26,300 Arrivederci. 489 00:38:31,100 --> 00:38:33,950 Hmm, hundreds of broads at his feet. 490 00:38:34,150 --> 00:38:35,950 Get a test on this guy. 491 00:38:36,150 --> 00:38:38,150 A screen test? -No. 492 00:38:38,350 --> 00:38:40,150 A blood test. 493 00:38:40,350 --> 00:38:42,150 -Good morning, Uncle Buck. 494 00:38:42,350 --> 00:38:44,350 I have information here regarding... 495 00:38:44,550 --> 00:38:47,350 a certain mutual acquaintance named Breckinridge. 496 00:38:47,550 --> 00:38:50,350 Stand up when a lady comes into the room, you son of a bitch. - 497 00:38:50,550 --> 00:38:55,350 My dearly departed kinsman was never married no how, no place... 498 00:38:55,550 --> 00:38:57,750 not to you nor nobody. 499 00:38:57,950 --> 00:38:59,750 You think you're pretty clever, don't you? 500 00:38:59,950 --> 00:39:02,350 Smarter than a flea in a feather bed. 501 00:39:02,550 --> 00:39:05,350 You make me sad, Uncle, really sad. 502 00:39:05,550 --> 00:39:07,850 I believe you misunderstand my meanin', Myra. 503 00:39:08,050 --> 00:39:10,750 You're out. The con game didn't work. 504 00:39:10,950 --> 00:39:15,750 There's no record of any Myron Breckinridge being married in the whole United States. 505 00:39:15,950 --> 00:39:18,400 Nowhere in the United States, hmm? -That's right. 506 00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:20,450 Do you know why that might be? 507 00:39:20,650 --> 00:39:23,250 American Airlines has ten regular flights a day. 508 00:39:23,450 --> 00:39:26,050 I'd be glad to pay your fare back home. 509 00:39:26,250 --> 00:39:29,350 No record of my marriage to Myron exists in any of the United States... 510 00:39:29,550 --> 00:39:32,600 for the excellent reason that we were married in Mexico. 511 00:39:35,200 --> 00:39:37,600 Monterrey. “ 512 00:40:10,750 --> 00:40:12,750 It's a goddamn disgrace, Buck. 513 00:40:12,950 --> 00:40:15,950 A man can't take his family to the movies without seeing some kind of filth. 514 00:40:16,150 --> 00:40:18,150 Yeah, yeah, I know. Now, listen, Charlie. 515 00:40:18,350 --> 00:40:21,800 You gotta get this bitch off my neck. She's making my life a living hell. 516 00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:23,850 Maybe you could plant drugs on her. 517 00:40:24,050 --> 00:40:25,900 I mean filth, Buck! 518 00:40:26,100 --> 00:40:29,250 I saw this picture where people were fornicating. 519 00:40:29,450 --> 00:40:33,150 Fornicating! -You mean, uh, really doing it? 520 00:40:33,350 --> 00:40:36,950 God's honest truth, Buck. I've seen it three times, and I tell you... 521 00:40:37,150 --> 00:40:38,950 Hoo-hoo! Three times? 522 00:40:39,150 --> 00:40:41,150 You gotta know your enemy if you're gonna beat them. 523 00:40:41,350 --> 00:40:44,550 It's sick. What is this business coming to? 524 00:40:44,750 --> 00:40:46,900 Destroying the moral fibers of this country 525 00:40:55,850 --> 00:40:57,850 Corrupting our youth. 526 00:40:58,050 --> 00:41:01,050 I've seen things, Buck, that would turn your stomach. 527 00:41:01,250 --> 00:41:04,550 It's not your basic naked women or the fornication. 528 00:41:04,750 --> 00:41:09,400 It's the fags, the dykes and every kind of perversion. 529 00:41:10,550 --> 00:41:12,550 Banana split. 530 00:41:12,750 --> 00:41:14,800 With nuts? 531 00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:17,250 The reason he doesn't want to take Nancy to the prom... 532 00:41:17,450 --> 00:41:20,850 is that he thinks he has the clap... 533 00:41:21,050 --> 00:41:24,150 and he knows that she wants to ball him... 534 00:41:24,350 --> 00:41:26,650 and he's afraid that he will. 535 00:41:26,850 --> 00:41:30,300 I mean, it's a real selfless act, you know? 536 00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:50,100 Bang, bang! -Fuck off. 537 00:41:51,300 --> 00:41:53,900 Come in, Rusty. 538 00:41:57,400 --> 00:42:00,350 Make yourself at home, such as it is. 539 00:42:00,550 --> 00:42:03,450 Oh, Uncle Buck really did himself proud this time. 540 00:42:03,650 --> 00:42:07,950 Of course, I'm only kissin' kin and all. 541 00:42:08,150 --> 00:42:10,850 Recently, Mary Ann was telling me that I... 542 00:42:11,050 --> 00:42:13,150 Have a tendency to pick on you. 543 00:42:13,350 --> 00:42:15,950 Yeah, you sure do. 544 00:42:16,150 --> 00:42:19,650 Oh. Well, if I spend my valuable time on you... 545 00:42:19,850 --> 00:42:22,650 it's because I feel you have a glimmer of potential talent... 546 00:42:22,850 --> 00:42:24,650 and I'm trying to help you walk like normal people. 547 00:42:24,850 --> 00:42:27,550 Look at the way you're leaning to one side right now. 548 00:42:27,750 --> 00:42:30,150 You obviously have a physical problem. 549 00:42:30,350 --> 00:42:32,400 Mary Ann told me about your back. 550 00:42:32,600 --> 00:42:35,950 I broke four ribs, and even so, I finished the last half 551 00:42:36,150 --> 00:42:38,850 Very admirable, I'm sure. If you don't mind, I'd like you to stand up... 552 00:42:39,050 --> 00:42:42,300 and walk over to the door first, and then back here to me. 553 00:42:44,850 --> 00:42:46,850 Oh, shit. 554 00:42:47,050 --> 00:42:49,050 I'm sorry. I missed that. What was that again? 555 00:42:52,600 --> 00:42:54,950 Rusty... 556 00:42:55,150 --> 00:42:58,450 it's been my experience in the past, in problems like yours... 557 00:42:58,650 --> 00:43:01,050 that it sometimes helps if you dance. 558 00:43:01,250 --> 00:43:03,250 Imagine you're listening... 559 00:43:03,450 --> 00:43:06,200 to the big sound of Glenn Miller. 560 00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:11,200 You can keep time by snapping your fingers. 561 00:43:14,700 --> 00:43:17,200 I feel silly. -Turn around. 562 00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:36,050 You know, all you really need is something to remind you to... to stand straight. 563 00:43:36,250 --> 00:43:39,450 Now, tell me, where were the ribs broken, Rusty? 564 00:43:39,650 --> 00:43:44,350 Four was busted right here, which is why I'm kind of pulled over to this side. 565 00:43:44,550 --> 00:43:46,700 Uh, let me see. 566 00:43:47,800 --> 00:43:50,450 Uh, like this? 567 00:43:50,650 --> 00:43:53,150 No, I want to see your back. Take off your shirt. 568 00:43:53,350 --> 00:43:57,850 But there's nothing to see. I mean, all of the ribs are inside me that were broken. 569 00:43:58,050 --> 00:44:00,650 I know where ribs are, Rusty... 570 00:44:00,850 --> 00:44:05,000 but I want to see the exact point where the muscle is pulling. 571 00:44:24,650 --> 00:44:26,650 Oh, your T-shirt too. 572 00:44:26,850 --> 00:44:29,200 Haven't got X-ray eyes. 573 00:44:36,300 --> 00:44:40,450 Well, you certainly are in good condition, Rusty. 574 00:44:40,650 --> 00:44:42,450 Well, I work out some. ] 575 00:44:42,650 --> 00:44:44,750 Not like I ought to or used to. 576 00:44:44,950 --> 00:44:47,800 Yes. Would you face the wall with your arms at your side... 577 00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:50,600 hands pressed very flat against the wall? 578 00:44:58,300 --> 00:45:00,650 Now... 579 00:45:00,850 --> 00:45:03,750 hands flat against the wall! -But Miss Myra, you're jerking my pants down! 580 00:45:03,950 --> 00:45:06,450 Will you do as I say? 581 00:45:06,650 --> 00:45:11,150 Now, I believe the problem is a little lower down, around the small of the back. 582 00:45:11,350 --> 00:45:13,850 I'd say around the lumbar region. 583 00:45:14,050 --> 00:45:16,500 Aha! Gotcha! -Yeah, okay. 584 00:46:01,400 --> 00:46:05,550 Hell 's Angels. 585 00:46:05,750 --> 00:46:07,750 Okay, I'm a movie. Who am I? 586 00:46:07,950 --> 00:46:09,950 How Green Was My Valley. 587 00:48:13,550 --> 00:48:15,550 Remind me to start takin' diet pills again. 588 00:48:15,750 --> 00:48:17,750 The zipper keeps gettin' strung. 589 00:48:21,800 --> 00:48:24,550 Yeah? -Miss Van Allen's car just came through the gate. 590 00:48:24,750 --> 00:48:26,750 Goddamn! 591 00:48:28,900 --> 00:48:31,650 Ah, Mary Ann, I've been meaning to tell you... 592 00:48:31,850 --> 00:48:35,650 I'm seriously considering recommending you to Leticia Van Alien. 593 00:48:35,850 --> 00:48:38,850 Thanks. -Well, you don't sound too pleased about it. 594 00:48:39,050 --> 00:48:42,850 You make me feel as though I've just announced a plague of locusts. 595 00:48:43,050 --> 00:48:45,350 What's the matter, Mary Ann? 596 00:48:45,550 --> 00:48:47,350 Is it Rusty? 597 00:48:47,550 --> 00:48:49,550 Can I do anything to help? 598 00:48:49,750 --> 00:48:52,250 Oh, Myra, I'm so worried about him. 599 00:48:52,450 --> 00:48:55,100 Oh, there, there. 600 00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:04,350 Busted? 601 00:49:04,550 --> 00:49:08,050 The first time wasn't his fault at all, but he was on parole. 602 00:49:08,250 --> 00:49:11,250 This time, they'll really put him away. 603 00:49:11,450 --> 00:49:14,600 Nonsense. They'll do nothing of the kind. You just leave that to me. 604 00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:17,250 Why? ls there something you can do? 605 00:49:17,450 --> 00:49:20,800 Why, of course, my clear. lt's only the law. - 606 00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:25,550 Ah, Leticia Van Allen. -The kids and I sure appreciate these visits... 607 00:49:25,750 --> 00:49:27,550 particularly the scholarship boys. 608 00:49:27,750 --> 00:49:29,650 By the way, speaking of the scholarship fund... 609 00:49:29,850 --> 00:49:33,050 They say she goes to bed with all the actors she represents. 610 00:49:33,250 --> 00:49:35,150 Oh, Fl! talk about that another time. 611 00:49:35,350 --> 00:49:39,150 Yes. She must be a marvelous woman. 612 00:49:39,350 --> 00:49:43,650 I think all the gay boys are gonna take the business over. 613 00:49:43,850 --> 00:49:46,150 There's no more studs around anymore. 614 00:49:46,350 --> 00:49:50,150 Everyone's popping pills and smoking grass. 615 00:49:50,350 --> 00:49:52,150 Oh, Miss Van Allen? -Yes? 616 00:49:52,350 --> 00:49:54,300 This is Miss Breckinridge, who'll be with us teachin'... 617 00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:58,250 until she goes back East on or before September 3. 618 00:49:58,450 --> 00:50:02,150 Permit me to say that you are the only brain comparable to my late husband's. 619 00:50:02,350 --> 00:50:06,150 Ooh, I appreciate that, honey, but what did your late husband do? 620 00:50:06,350 --> 00:50:08,750 He wrote books about the movies. 621 00:50:08,950 --> 00:50:12,450 Oh. Was he gay? -Ostensibly he was Americana... 622 00:50:12,650 --> 00:50:17,550 a terelyne-hosed chick-baller from East 57th Street, but underneath it all... 623 00:50:17,750 --> 00:50:20,050 He was gay. Sit down, honey. 624 00:50:20,250 --> 00:50:22,350 You sound like a good agent. 625 00:50:22,550 --> 00:50:26,550 You see, Miss Van Allen, Uncle Buck and I deal in myths. 626 00:50:26,750 --> 00:50:30,550 And movie stars are like gods and goddesses. 627 00:50:30,750 --> 00:50:33,150 When one fades, another promptly takes its place... 628 00:50:33,350 --> 00:50:37,250 because the human race requires that the pantheon always be filled. 629 00:50:37,450 --> 00:50:39,850 And you and I must seek out the glittering few... 630 00:50:40,050 --> 00:50:44,250 that are the new stars of our race reborn! 631 00:50:44,450 --> 00:50:49,550 That is the damnedest thing lever heard... about this business. 632 00:50:49,750 --> 00:50:53,900 You have all the kinky angles that are in right now. What about studs? 633 00:50:54,100 --> 00:50:55,950 Heaven. 634 00:50:56,150 --> 00:50:58,650 I mean, have you any that I don't know about? 635 00:50:58,850 --> 00:51:00,900 Uh, only one that's really “A“ material. 636 00:51:01,100 --> 00:51:03,950 I know you'd like him. He's our pride and joy. 637 00:51:04,150 --> 00:51:08,350 He's the last stronghold of masculinity in this Disneyland of perversion. 638 00:51:08,550 --> 00:51:11,750 He looks like he's got quite a lot going for him. What's his name? 639 00:51:11,950 --> 00:51:15,950 Rusty Godowsky. -I ain't sure these kids should try to walk before they can run. 640 00:51:16,150 --> 00:51:19,650 Anyway, Rusty's been busked. -Arrested for what? 641 00:51:19,850 --> 00:51:23,650 Violation of parole. Perhaps you could help. 642 00:51:23,850 --> 00:51:25,650 I'll look into it. 643 00:51:25,850 --> 00:51:27,800 I have a judge by the... 644 00:51:28,000 --> 00:51:29,850 Oh, Leticia... 645 00:51:30,050 --> 00:51:32,950 they don't call you “Queen of the Casting Couch“ for nothing. 646 00:51:33,150 --> 00:51:36,950 From what I understand, they're voting me a special Academy Award. 647 00:51:37,150 --> 00:51:39,250 An Oscar? -No. 648 00:51:39,450 --> 00:51:41,850 A golden phallus. 649 00:51:42,050 --> 00:51:45,450 And let me tell you, someday we'll have our own stable of studs. 650 00:51:45,650 --> 00:51:49,050 A steady stream of sturdy studs. 651 00:51:49,250 --> 00:51:52,850 A boy bank, where credit is always good. 652 00:51:53,050 --> 00:51:55,750 Sort of a lay-a-day plan. 653 00:51:55,950 --> 00:51:59,650 God bless America! -God help America. 654 00:51:59,850 --> 00:52:02,650 A lay a clay. Mmm. 655 00:52:02,850 --> 00:52:06,300 That reminds me. I simply must go. 656 00:52:06,500 --> 00:52:08,350 Identical twins. 657 00:52:08,550 --> 00:52:10,650 I'm the only one that knows the difference. 658 00:52:10,850 --> 00:52:15,150 Yeah. Get me judge Frederic D. Cannon. 659 00:52:15,350 --> 00:52:17,150 Keep ringing the judge's chambers. 660 00:52:17,350 --> 00:52:20,350 He sleeps there between sessions. 661 00:52:20,550 --> 00:52:22,550 Never mind howl know. 662 00:52:25,300 --> 00:52:29,350 No nation can long endure the onslaught of godless Communism... 663 00:52:29,550 --> 00:52:32,650 which permeates the very warp and woof of Southern California. 664 00:52:32,850 --> 00:52:36,250 Eternal alertness to what your neighbor is up to is the price of freedom. 665 00:52:36,450 --> 00:52:39,650 Miss Breckinridge, keep your eye on him at all times. 666 00:52:39,850 --> 00:52:42,200 And remember... 667 00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:45,850 the Commies will use every infernal device known to man... 668 00:52:46,050 --> 00:52:49,350 to worm their way into our churches and supermarkets... 669 00:52:49,550 --> 00:52:51,350 which is why... 670 00:52:51,550 --> 00:52:55,650 only the National Rifle Association stands between a free America... 671 00:52:55,850 --> 00:52:57,650 and a Communist takeover. 672 00:52:57,850 --> 00:53:02,350 With this in mind, we may yet curb the lawlessness and degenerate values... 673 00:53:02,550 --> 00:53:04,350 as expressed by the Kremlin... 674 00:53:04,550 --> 00:53:06,500 and upheld... 675 00:53:06,700 --> 00:53:10,550 by the Supreme Court of the United States. 676 00:53:10,750 --> 00:53:13,200 Well, thank you, sir. Come along, Rusty. 677 00:54:39,050 --> 00:54:41,050 Say, Ollie? -What? 678 00:54:41,250 --> 00:54:43,050 What time is it? 679 00:54:43,250 --> 00:54:46,500 It's nearly half past. -Thank you, Ollie. 680 00:55:13,100 --> 00:55:15,350 Ladies and gentlemen... 681 00:55:15,550 --> 00:55:18,050 we take great pleasure in presenting to you... 682 00:55:18,250 --> 00:55:20,750 the world-famous recording star... 683 00:55:20,950 --> 00:55:23,500 Miss Leticia Van Allen... 684 00:55:23,700 --> 00:55:26,000 and the Van Allen Dancers. 685 00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:38,150 Hell, jail wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for all those faggots. 686 00:55:38,350 --> 00:55:41,350 There's always some fruit after you. 687 00:55:41,550 --> 00:55:44,950 That shouldn't bother you, Rusty. 688 00:55:45,150 --> 00:55:46,950 Well, the whole idea makes me wanna puke. 689 00:55:47,150 --> 00:55:50,050 A man should act like a man. Know what l mean? 690 00:55:50,250 --> 00:55:51,850 Look out, baby! 691 00:55:52,050 --> 00:55:54,600 How should a man act? 692 00:55:57,300 --> 00:55:59,700 He should ball chicks. That's how. 693 00:56:03,950 --> 00:56:05,950 But only if he loves her. - Cigars... 694 00:56:06,150 --> 00:56:10,200 cigarettes, chewing gum... 695 00:56:12,150 --> 00:56:14,150 Bananas. 696 00:56:14,350 --> 00:56:16,750 What is normal? 697 00:56:16,950 --> 00:56:19,750 Well, it's what everyone does. 698 00:56:19,950 --> 00:56:23,400 I mean, it's what the majority of society does most. 699 00:56:27,500 --> 00:56:29,500 Yeah. 700 00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:05,350 I still think a guy should ball chicks. 701 00:59:05,550 --> 00:59:08,950 Ah-ha-ha. -Hi. 702 00:59:09,150 --> 00:59:11,150 How's it goin', girls? 703 00:59:11,350 --> 00:59:13,500 just great, sweetie. 704 00:59:20,550 --> 00:59:22,550 Playing, uh, canasta? 705 00:59:22,750 --> 00:59:26,350 That's right, sweetie. 706 00:59:26,550 --> 00:59:29,100 Hey. Great, great, great. 707 00:59:33,900 --> 00:59:37,250 Uh, how's your poker game going, sweetie? 708 00:59:37,450 --> 00:59:39,650 Ah, great, great. 709 00:59:39,850 --> 00:59:41,650 Great. 710 00:59:41,850 --> 00:59:45,050 Just great. 711 00:59:45,250 --> 00:59:47,250 Yes. 712 00:59:53,850 --> 00:59:55,850 Bang! Bang! -Oh! 713 00:59:56,050 --> 00:59:58,450 Ooh, you got him, Kid Barlow. You got him. 714 00:59:58,650 --> 01:00:01,350 Kid Barlow was the fastest gun at Republic Pictures. 715 01:00:01,550 --> 01:00:03,550 Them was the days. 716 01:00:03,750 --> 01:00:06,450 Yeah. Well... 717 01:00:06,650 --> 01:00:09,050 every time I look at them old flicks of mine... 718 01:00:09,250 --> 01:00:11,150 in the morning on TV... 719 01:00:11,350 --> 01:00:13,850 I get a lump right here in my throat. 720 01:00:14,050 --> 01:00:17,450 Oh, we was Saturday afternoon for the whole world. 721 01:00:17,650 --> 01:00:21,350 Till our kind of pictures... 722 01:00:21,550 --> 01:00:23,950 just rode off in the sunset. 723 01:00:24,150 --> 01:00:26,950 And what's taken our place? I'll tell you what. 724 01:00:27,150 --> 01:00:29,650 Perversion. That's what's taken our place. 725 01:00:29,850 --> 01:00:32,600 Communist perverts turning out filth. 726 01:00:47,200 --> 01:00:49,200 I guess I'll have to pass. 727 01:00:51,050 --> 01:00:53,050 One no-trump. 728 01:00:53,250 --> 01:00:55,050 Three hearts. 729 01:00:55,250 --> 01:00:57,650 Three hearts? 730 01:00:57,850 --> 01:01:00,950 Three no-trump. 731 01:01:01,150 --> 01:01:04,550 Three no-trump? I know I'll have to pass now. 732 01:01:04,750 --> 01:01:08,700 No bid. 733 01:01:48,100 --> 01:01:50,950 Well, how was the beef teriyaki? 734 01:01:51,150 --> 01:01:55,000 Awful. Worse than the chow mein. 735 01:01:57,400 --> 01:01:59,550 What's that? 736 01:01:59,750 --> 01:02:01,950 Swedish massage. 737 01:02:02,150 --> 01:02:05,550 What do you do with it? 738 01:02:05,750 --> 01:02:08,450 I beat you with it. 739 01:02:08,650 --> 01:02:11,050 Does it hurt? 740 01:02:11,250 --> 01:02:13,250 You bet your ass. 741 01:02:15,350 --> 01:02:17,350 Somethings wrong here someplace. 742 01:02:17,550 --> 01:02:17,600 Good evening, Rusty. 743 01:02:17,800 --> 01:02:19,800 Good evening, Rusty. 744 01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:35,450 Um, gee, it's, uh, really nice... 745 01:02:35,650 --> 01:02:39,200 that Leticia Van Allen wants to represent Mary Ann, isn't it? 746 01:02:39,400 --> 01:02:42,050 Yes, very nice. About your back... 747 01:02:42,250 --> 01:02:44,650 I've spoken to Uncle Buck's chiropractor... 748 01:02:44,850 --> 01:02:47,550 and she's going to arrange a special brace. 749 01:02:47,750 --> 01:02:52,550 But she couldn't be here tonight. So she asked me to take an exact tracing of your spine... 750 01:02:52,750 --> 01:02:54,550 so that she'll know what to do. 751 01:02:54,750 --> 01:02:57,450 So if you'll just slip off your shirt... 752 01:02:57,650 --> 01:02:59,650 we'll get right to work. 753 01:03:22,650 --> 01:03:24,650 Step on the scale... 754 01:03:24,850 --> 01:03:26,850 and we'll measure you. 755 01:03:29,900 --> 01:03:34,650 Take off those atrocious cowboy boots. 756 01:03:34,850 --> 01:03:36,750 They'll break the scale. -Oh, no, they won't. 757 01:03:36,950 --> 01:03:39,850 Do exactly as I tell you. 758 01:03:40,050 --> 01:03:43,650 You don't want me to have to tell the judge that you've been... 759 01:03:43,850 --> 01:03:45,850 uncooperative, do you? 760 01:03:47,500 --> 01:03:49,500 No, no. 761 01:03:53,250 --> 01:03:55,250 Guess I'm full of holes. 762 01:03:55,450 --> 01:03:58,200 Oh, well, that's all right. 763 01:04:01,600 --> 01:04:04,200 Now we'll need your weight. 764 01:04:08,700 --> 01:04:10,700 Um, which is... 765 01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:14,800 174. 766 01:04:15,000 --> 01:04:17,000 And your height... 767 01:04:20,200 --> 01:04:22,450 which is... 768 01:04:22,650 --> 01:04:25,450 six-one and a quarter. 769 01:04:25,650 --> 01:04:27,450 Well, the chart's filling up nicely. 770 01:04:27,650 --> 01:04:29,650 You can get down. 771 01:04:30,900 --> 01:04:34,000 Now, we'll need a urine specimen. 772 01:04:37,200 --> 01:04:39,350 Step behind the screen. 773 01:04:39,550 --> 01:04:41,600 But, uh... -But? 774 01:05:01,300 --> 01:05:04,050 Well, what's the matter? 775 01:05:04,250 --> 01:05:07,750 I don't know. I guess I'm, uh, what they call pee shy. 776 01:05:07,950 --> 01:05:10,650 Well, don't be. 777 01:05:10,850 --> 01:05:12,650 just relax. 778 01:05:12,850 --> 01:05:15,800 We have plenty of time. 779 01:05:32,800 --> 01:05:34,800 Ah. Bravo. 780 01:05:37,400 --> 01:05:39,400 Now, then. 781 01:05:41,800 --> 01:05:43,800 Rusty... 782 01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:48,200 Godowsky. 783 01:05:49,700 --> 01:05:54,450 Would you come here and loosen your belt? 784 01:05:54,650 --> 01:05:56,900 Perhaps we better wait for the doctor. 785 01:05:58,400 --> 01:06:02,250 Do as you're told, Rusty. -What do you want me to do? 786 01:06:02,450 --> 01:06:05,750 Well, it's very simple. I don't know what you're so frightened of. 787 01:06:05,950 --> 01:06:11,100 All I want you to do is loosen your belt and say, “Ah. " 788 01:06:19,100 --> 01:06:21,200 Now, then, take a deep breath. 789 01:06:27,400 --> 01:06:29,650 Turn your head to the side and cough. 790 01:06:29,850 --> 01:06:33,000 Hmm. Bend over the table, please. 791 01:06:37,600 --> 01:06:40,050 There's more where that came from. Bend over the table. 792 01:06:40,250 --> 01:06:42,450 I want to take your temperature. -But not there. 793 01:06:42,650 --> 01:06:44,850 Certainly there. 794 01:06:45,050 --> 01:06:50,350 I don't know, Rusty. You've been showing a very suspicious reluctance. 795 01:06:50,550 --> 01:06:54,250 I think you have a disease you've been hiding from me. 796 01:06:54,450 --> 01:06:56,550 Why, no, Miss Myra. 797 01:06:56,750 --> 01:06:58,750 Then face down on the table. 798 01:06:58,950 --> 01:07:01,400 Hands up here. 799 01:07:02,700 --> 01:07:05,800 All right. Now, this is just so you won't move... 800 01:07:06,000 --> 01:07:08,500 while I do the tracing. 801 01:07:08,700 --> 01:07:11,500 There we go. 802 01:07:19,300 --> 01:07:21,300 Now, then. Bottoms up. -Hey. 803 01:07:22,900 --> 01:07:25,850 Now, you must be very still. 804 01:07:26,050 --> 01:07:28,800 I don't want that thermometer broken, Rusty. 805 01:07:34,500 --> 01:07:38,200 Tell me... 806 01:07:38,400 --> 01:07:40,950 have you ever suffered from tuberculosis? -No. 807 01:07:41,150 --> 01:07:42,950 Heart disease? -No. 808 01:07:43,150 --> 01:07:44,950 Chicken pox? -No. 809 01:07:45,150 --> 01:07:46,750 Smallpox? -No. 810 01:07:46,950 --> 01:07:48,450 Measles? -N o. 811 01:07:48,650 --> 01:07:50,150 venereal disease? -Nu. 812 01:07:50,350 --> 01:07:52,650 Be careful, Rusty. -l said, “No“! 813 01:07:52,850 --> 01:07:54,650 We'll see. 814 01:07:54,850 --> 01:07:59,250 They checked me out in Mexico. I had the Wassermann test. 815 01:07:59,450 --> 01:08:02,150 Really. Hmm. 816 01:08:02,350 --> 01:08:04,450 What are you doing? 817 01:08:04,650 --> 01:08:07,500 I'm preparing you for your brace. 818 01:08:07,700 --> 01:08:09,850 Oh, Christ. -What's the matter, Rusty? 819 01:08:10,050 --> 01:08:12,550 I said, “Oh, Christ.“ -What is it, Rusty? 820 01:08:12,750 --> 01:08:15,350 You're playing some kind of joke on me. I know you are. 821 01:08:15,550 --> 01:08:17,750 You're playing some kind of joke. 822 01:08:17,950 --> 01:08:21,350 Oh, this is no joke, Rusty. 823 01:08:21,550 --> 01:08:23,550 I'm in deadly earnest. 824 01:08:24,450 --> 01:08:26,450 You have a lot to learn. 825 01:08:26,650 --> 01:08:29,750 All you men have a lot to learn. 826 01:08:29,950 --> 01:08:32,550 And I have taken it upon myself... 827 01:08:32,750 --> 01:08:35,050 to teach you. 828 01:08:35,250 --> 01:08:37,050 What do you mean? 829 01:08:37,250 --> 01:08:40,150 This is the most important part of your education. 830 01:08:40,350 --> 01:08:44,000 The part your teachers failed to instruct you in. 831 01:08:45,700 --> 01:08:47,700 Take off your hat. 832 01:08:50,700 --> 01:08:53,950 It's called balling. -Well, I know how to do that. 833 01:08:54,150 --> 01:08:55,950 That's what you think. 834 01:08:56,150 --> 01:08:58,350 Did you know you have a temperature? -No, I didn't. 835 01:08:58,550 --> 01:09:03,050 Well, you do. But no matter. I shall cure what's wrong with you. 836 01:09:03,250 --> 01:09:07,100 What are you gonna do? 837 01:09:13,200 --> 01:09:16,900 I shall ball you, Rusty. It's very simple. 838 01:09:17,100 --> 01:09:17,000 And now, ladies and gentlemen... 839 01:09:17,200 --> 01:09:20,450 And now, ladies and gentlemen... 840 01:09:20,650 --> 01:09:22,450 what you've all been waiting for... 841 01:09:22,650 --> 01:09:26,950 the wildest, buckingest bronc in the world. 842 01:09:27,150 --> 01:09:30,350 He's never been ridden before. 843 01:09:30,550 --> 01:09:34,150 Cherry, the man-killer. 844 01:09:34,350 --> 01:09:37,950 Oh, well, what nature intended is not always good for us, Rusty. 845 01:09:38,150 --> 01:09:41,150 You think that being a man is such a simple thing. 846 01:09:41,350 --> 01:09:43,650 A man should ball chicks, you said. 847 01:09:43,850 --> 01:09:47,700 Well, I tried to explain it to you, but you wouldn't listen. 848 01:09:47,900 --> 01:09:50,700 So, I'm afraid it will require a practical demonstration. 849 01:09:55,000 --> 01:09:58,650 Oh, my God. Jesus, you'll kill me. 850 01:09:58,850 --> 01:10:00,750 I won't kill you, Rusty. 851 01:10:00,950 --> 01:10:03,450 I 'll just educate you. You and the rest of America. 852 01:10:03,650 --> 01:10:06,750 It must be demonstrated to you practically... 853 01:10:06,950 --> 01:10:09,050 that there is no such thing as manhood. 854 01:10:09,250 --> 01:10:11,750 It died with Burt Lancaster... 855 01:10:11,950 --> 01:10:13,750 in Vera Cruz. 856 01:10:13,950 --> 01:10:18,800 Your manhood was taken by Errol Flynn and Clark Gable. 857 01:10:20,300 --> 01:10:23,250 lam only going to supply you with the finishing touches. 858 01:10:23,450 --> 01:10:25,250 Oh, God. 859 01:10:25,450 --> 01:10:28,650 I reckon none of you northern folks ever heard a Texas cowhand... 860 01:10:28,850 --> 01:10:30,850 making love to his gal. 861 01:10:31,050 --> 01:10:33,050 Well, you're gonna hear it now. 862 01:10:35,300 --> 01:10:38,450 Charge! 863 01:10:38,650 --> 01:10:40,650 God, no, what are you... 864 01:10:42,600 --> 01:10:44,900 She certainly leaned on that one. 865 01:10:46,900 --> 01:10:49,300 Get 'em. Get up there. -Oh! Oh! 866 01:10:57,200 --> 01:10:59,650 Ah, that's what I call disgusting. 867 01:10:59,850 --> 01:11:02,200 Why don't you show him how, Sergeant? 868 01:11:23,600 --> 01:11:27,700 I'm coming, Scarlett. I'm coming. 869 01:11:27,900 --> 01:11:30,750 I'm coming, Lana. I'm coming. 870 01:11:30,950 --> 01:11:34,400 Hooray for Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck. 871 01:11:35,950 --> 01:11:37,950 Uncle Sam, here I... 872 01:11:38,150 --> 01:11:43,300 co-o-o-o-om e! 873 01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:08,050 Marvelous. Absolutely marvelous. -Leave him alone. 874 01:12:08,250 --> 01:12:11,400 It's the first time in my whole life I've ever really enjoyed opera. 875 01:13:43,700 --> 01:13:45,700 Can I go now? 876 01:13:49,900 --> 01:13:51,900 Yes. 877 01:13:54,100 --> 01:13:56,350 You can go... 878 01:13:56,550 --> 01:13:58,550 HOW. 879 01:14:06,600 --> 01:14:11,000 Well, aren't you going to thank me for all the trouble I've taken? 880 01:14:15,300 --> 01:14:17,300 Thank you, ma'am. 881 01:14:19,600 --> 01:14:22,150 You know what, Ollie? -What? 882 01:14:22,350 --> 01:14:24,750 I feel like a mouse. 883 01:14:24,950 --> 01:14:29,550 We had to do it. It hurt me more than it did him. 884 01:14:29,750 --> 01:14:32,300 Poor Daniel. 885 01:14:35,300 --> 01:14:38,100 Oh. 886 01:14:44,250 --> 01:14:46,250 $422'??? 887 01:14:46,450 --> 01:14:48,900 Well, are you alone? 888 01:14:50,100 --> 01:14:52,100 Come right up. 889 01:14:54,700 --> 01:14:57,050 Why are you so fascinated by the girl? 890 01:14:57,250 --> 01:14:59,250 But having raped Rusty's manhood... 891 01:14:59,450 --> 01:15:01,550 I must now complete the cycle... 892 01:15:01,750 --> 01:15:03,750 and seduce his girl. 893 01:15:04,800 --> 01:15:07,850 Only then will my victory be complete... 894 01:15:08,050 --> 01:15:11,050 thus exerting power over both sexes... 895 01:15:11,250 --> 01:15:13,550 and indeed over life itself. 896 01:15:13,750 --> 01:15:16,850 Boy, she's a tough customer. 897 01:15:17,050 --> 01:15:19,150 What are you moping about? 898 01:15:19,350 --> 01:15:22,400 She's so sweet. 899 01:15:23,350 --> 01:15:25,350 Come on. 900 01:15:25,550 --> 01:15:27,750 Mary Ann. -Oh, Myra. 901 01:15:27,950 --> 01:15:31,100 Why, Mary Ann, what's the matter? 902 01:15:34,250 --> 01:15:36,250 Rusty's gone again. 903 01:15:36,450 --> 01:15:38,750 Gone? Where? 904 01:15:38,950 --> 01:15:42,150 I don't know. I just don't understand. 905 01:15:42,350 --> 01:15:45,750 Well, let me fix you a drink. 906 01:15:45,950 --> 01:15:48,000 It'll soothe your nerves. 907 01:15:50,400 --> 01:15:53,650 Didn't he give you any explanation at all? 908 01:15:53,850 --> 01:15:56,050 No. Nothing. 909 01:15:56,250 --> 01:15:58,050 It was frightening. 910 01:15:58,250 --> 01:16:01,450 Just that he was sick of me. Sick of women. 911 01:16:01,650 --> 01:16:03,650 Sick of women? 912 01:16:05,200 --> 01:16:08,400 He actually said that? -Yes. 913 01:16:09,800 --> 01:16:12,850 Well, I'm certain he didn't mean sick of you. 914 01:16:13,050 --> 01:16:17,150 Oh, sick of women in general, perhaps. 915 01:16:17,350 --> 01:16:19,350 I don't know. Both, I guess. 916 01:16:21,400 --> 01:16:23,950 Men. They're all alike. 917 01:16:24,150 --> 01:16:27,000 But don't you worry. We'll find him. 918 01:16:28,100 --> 01:16:30,850 We've just got to. 919 01:16:31,050 --> 01:16:33,400 I may never see him again. 920 01:16:36,050 --> 01:16:38,050 Of course you will. 921 01:16:38,250 --> 01:16:40,650 You'll see. Everything will work out just fine. 922 01:16:40,850 --> 01:16:43,050 I'm so worried. 923 01:16:43,250 --> 01:16:45,950 I just can? go back there. 924 01:16:46,150 --> 01:16:48,650 You don't have to. You can stay here with me. 925 01:16:48,850 --> 01:16:50,650 Oh, no. I couldn't. 926 01:16:50,850 --> 01:16:52,650 I insist. 927 01:16:52,850 --> 01:16:54,750 Are you sure? -Absolutely. 928 01:16:54,950 --> 01:16:57,500 It's really no bother at all. 929 01:16:58,700 --> 01:17:01,900 Really. We'll just find you something to wear. 930 01:17:04,900 --> 01:17:08,500 Now, then. Let me see. 931 01:17:15,700 --> 01:17:18,050 Those are men's pajamas. 932 01:17:18,250 --> 01:17:20,050 Oh. So they are. 933 01:17:20,250 --> 01:17:22,450 How indiscreet. 934 01:17:22,650 --> 01:17:24,550 You've had a very trying day, Mary Ann. 935 01:17:24,750 --> 01:17:26,950 I really feel you should go right to bed. 936 01:17:27,150 --> 01:17:31,550 I don't know how to thank you. You've been so sweet to me, Myra. 937 01:17:31,750 --> 01:17:34,300 And don't you worry about Rusty. 938 01:17:36,000 --> 01:17:38,200 It's either them or me. I told him. 939 01:17:38,400 --> 01:17:41,000 And of course it will be you, my darling. 940 01:17:41,200 --> 01:17:44,150 Now, let's have a nice girlie evening. 941 01:17:44,350 --> 01:17:47,850 I'll tell you howl lost my virginity, if you tell me how you lost yours. 942 01:17:48,050 --> 01:17:51,400 Jesus. -There we go. 943 01:17:53,500 --> 01:17:55,550 Oh, Rusty. 944 01:17:55,750 --> 01:17:58,050 Oh. 945 01:17:58,250 --> 01:18:00,450 There, there, my dear. 946 01:18:00,650 --> 01:18:03,650 He's only a man, and not good enough for you. 947 01:18:03,850 --> 01:18:08,100 How well I remember my own puppy love. -No shit. 948 01:18:15,550 --> 01:18:17,550 Mmm, Myra? 949 01:18:17,750 --> 01:18:21,750 This is Leticia. Rusty's at the beach house with me right now. 950 01:18:21,950 --> 01:18:23,750 I'm calling to say thanks. 951 01:18:23,950 --> 01:18:26,650 Oh, I'm... I'm so glad you liked him. 952 01:18:26,850 --> 01:18:28,650 Uh, is it the right color? 953 01:18:28,850 --> 01:18:31,550 Well, I guess so. It's the usual color. 954 01:18:31,750 --> 01:18:35,150 Didn't you ever make it with him? -Not in the classic way, no. 955 01:18:35,350 --> 01:18:39,450 Well, I 'm... I hope he sleeps well in his new home. 956 01:18:39,650 --> 01:18:41,700 I wouldn't entrust him to just anyone. 957 01:18:41,900 --> 01:18:45,500 Good night, dear lady. -Oh, well. Good night. 958 01:18:45,700 --> 01:18:49,950 Come on, honey. Let's take another trip around the world. 959 01:18:50,150 --> 01:18:50,200 Charlie, I've knowed you ever since you was a cough and a spit. 960 01:18:50,400 --> 01:18:54,750 Charlie, I've knowed you ever since you was a cough and a spit. 961 01:18:54,950 --> 01:18:56,750 Gee. -I've watched you become the dream... 962 01:18:56,950 --> 01:18:59,250 of every parent this side of San Diego. 963 01:18:59,450 --> 01:19:02,350 Wow. -You're a fine boy, Charlie. 964 01:19:02,550 --> 01:19:05,750 A fine boy. -Gee, uh, thanks, Uncle Buck. 965 01:19:05,950 --> 01:19:07,850 You know what I've always thought of you... 966 01:19:08,050 --> 01:19:10,450 ever since you did that morning television show on ABC. 967 01:19:10,650 --> 01:19:12,650 I can tell you now, Uncle Buck, that... 968 01:19:12,850 --> 01:19:14,650 Well, you've always been my idol. 969 01:19:14,850 --> 01:19:17,500 I've lost more fights over you at UCLA than anything else. 970 01:19:17,700 --> 01:19:21,250 I'm very moved to hear you say that, very moved. 971 01:19:21,450 --> 01:19:23,250 Also, I'm pleased to hear you're a fighter... 972 01:19:23,450 --> 01:19:25,550 'cause this Myra Breckinridge is more than a match... 973 01:19:25,750 --> 01:19:27,650 for most men... more than a match. 974 01:19:27,850 --> 01:19:32,250 l'll do my best, Uncle Buck, and, if my best isn't good enough, well, that's too bad. 975 01:19:32,450 --> 01:19:34,250 Not quite, Charlie. Not quite. 976 01:19:34,450 --> 01:19:36,550 If your best ain't good enough... 977 01:19:36,750 --> 01:19:39,050 you might just as well pack up and move to Milwaukee. 978 01:19:39,250 --> 01:19:41,650 There she is. 979 01:19:41,850 --> 01:19:45,200 Remember, the, uh, velvet hand and the iron glove. 980 01:19:52,200 --> 01:19:55,600 Come in, Myra. -Okay. Let her rip. 981 01:19:59,200 --> 01:20:02,350 This better be good. 982 01:20:02,550 --> 01:20:04,950 Who's this? It looks like The Late, Late Show. 983 01:20:05,150 --> 01:20:07,450 Myra, this is Charlie Flager of Flager & Flager. 984 01:20:07,650 --> 01:20:11,750 I thought you two should get together and sort out the little problems we've been having. 985 01:20:11,950 --> 01:20:14,350 Problems, Uncle Buck? I don? have any problems. 986 01:20:14,550 --> 01:20:17,350 All I know is that you owe me $900.000.. 987 01:20:17,550 --> 01:20:20,150 And the price of real estate is going up every day. 988 01:20:20,350 --> 01:20:23,250 I think you should know that Charlie's dad and me have been pals... 989 01:20:23,450 --> 01:20:26,150 ever since he handled me when I had that row with the Blue Network. 990 01:20:26,350 --> 01:20:28,550 I... I guess that we value Mr. Loner's account... 991 01:20:28,750 --> 01:20:31,850 more than any single non corporate account. 992 01:20:32,050 --> 01:20:36,750 Like Dad always says, “Buck Loner has a real reputation. “ 993 01:20:36,950 --> 01:20:38,850 Uh, for being, like, a straight shooter. 994 01:20:39,050 --> 01:20:41,850 When you two lovebirds are finished, perhaps you'll tell me... 995 01:20:42,050 --> 01:20:43,950 what lousy, dirty trick you're up to now. 996 01:20:44,150 --> 01:20:46,950 No lousy tricks, Mrs. Breckinridge. I am simply here... 997 01:20:47,150 --> 01:20:49,350 to defend my client's interest, which in this case... 998 01:20:49,550 --> 01:20:53,950 is your alleged claim to, like, half the value of this Westwood property. 999 01:20:54,150 --> 01:20:55,950 Alleged? -Alleged. 1000 01:20:56,150 --> 01:20:59,450 That marriage certificate is an out-and-out phony. 1001 01:20:59,650 --> 01:21:02,000 Oh. 1002 01:21:13,000 --> 01:21:17,350 It isn't easy being a woman, Uncle Buck... 1003 01:21:17,550 --> 01:21:20,850 especially when you have to fight your own family... 1004 01:21:21,050 --> 01:21:23,350 for what's rightfully yours. 1005 01:21:23,550 --> 01:21:25,850 Honey, honey, honey. 1006 01:21:26,050 --> 01:21:29,650 We don't want to take what's yours. That's the last thing on our mind. 1007 01:21:29,850 --> 01:21:32,050 But we gotta make sure you're entitled to it. 1008 01:21:32,250 --> 01:21:35,750 Like, you might be an impersonator saying you are who you are. 1009 01:21:35,950 --> 01:21:40,250 And after Gertrude gave you that $200 back in Philadelphia... 1010 01:21:40,450 --> 01:21:44,450 to pay for the abortion of the daughter of that Rexall druggist... 1011 01:21:44,650 --> 01:21:47,950 you knocked up and refused to marry. 1012 01:21:48,150 --> 01:21:51,150 The point is, can you prove you were married? 1013 01:21:51,350 --> 01:21:53,350 That 's all. 1014 01:21:56,000 --> 01:22:01,200 Proof will arrive before the end of the week in the person of Dr. Randolph Spencer Montag. 1015 01:22:02,750 --> 01:22:04,750 Montag? 1016 01:22:04,950 --> 01:22:08,350 The great dental psychiatrist? -He was a witness to our wedding. 1017 01:22:08,550 --> 01:22:11,950 I trust his word will be sufficient. 1018 01:22:12,150 --> 01:22:15,750 Let me make it perfectly clear that it might. 1019 01:22:15,950 --> 01:22:18,250 In any case, my price has gone up... 1020 01:22:18,450 --> 01:22:22,300 to an even million dollars. 1021 01:22:51,500 --> 01:22:54,300 How old were you then? 1022 01:22:57,850 --> 01:22:59,850 Long distance call, Dr. Montag. 1023 01:23:00,050 --> 01:23:02,250 Yeah. Uh, Mondo... No, no. Montag here. 1024 01:23:02,450 --> 01:23:04,650 Yeah? Oh. Oh, Myra. 1025 01:23:04,850 --> 01:23:06,650 How are ya, kid. How's your teeth? 1026 01:23:06,850 --> 01:23:08,700 Spit out now. 1027 01:23:08,900 --> 01:23:11,900 So, my so... -Myra, dental health is mental health. Will you remember that? 1028 01:23:12,100 --> 01:23:13,950 John Phillips tried to rape me. -Open. 1029 01:23:14,150 --> 01:23:17,350 And I said, “Oh, how can he do that?“ -What? 1030 01:23:17,550 --> 01:23:21,950 Myra, believe me that your appeal reaches me at every level... 1031 01:23:22,150 --> 01:23:24,350 from lower id to superego. 1032 01:23:24,550 --> 01:23:27,250 After all, I realize that our relationship was always much more... 1033 01:23:27,450 --> 01:23:29,250 than that simply of analyst to patient. 1034 01:23:29,450 --> 01:23:32,050 I'm also your dentist. 1035 01:23:32,250 --> 01:23:35,550 No... No, Myra, I've got other patients who need me too. 1036 01:23:35,750 --> 01:23:37,750 And he shouldn't have done it. -Spit out now, dear. 1037 01:23:37,950 --> 01:23:41,250 Oh, you've got such lovely boobs. They're such a comfort to me. 1038 01:23:41,450 --> 01:23:43,550 No, I said 15, Myra. Open up. 1039 01:23:43,750 --> 01:23:45,800 Fifteen percent. I'm in L.A. tomorrow. 1040 01:23:49,600 --> 01:23:54,350 Mighty kind of you, Doc, coming all this way to help our little Myra. 1041 01:23:54,550 --> 01:23:58,450 Of course, we all mean to do the right thing by her. -Then cut the crap... 1042 01:23:58,650 --> 01:24:03,450 and handover the cash. -Naturally, we are, uh, not about to question the probity... 1043 01:24:03,650 --> 01:24:07,250 of such a well-known person and author as Dr. Montag. 1044 01:24:07,450 --> 01:24:09,650 Yes? 1045 01:24:09,850 --> 01:24:12,950 New York calling Mr. Flager. -Which Mr. Flager? 1046 01:24:13,150 --> 01:24:15,950 Mr. Flager, Jr. 1047 01:24:16,150 --> 01:24:18,050 Take it, junior. 1048 01:24:18,250 --> 01:24:20,150 In the bathroom, you idiot. 1049 01:24:20,350 --> 01:24:22,350 Uh, I have to go to the bathroom. 1050 01:24:30,700 --> 01:24:32,750 Do you get to the movies much, Doctor? 1051 01:24:32,950 --> 01:24:36,450 I say do you get to the movies much, Doctor? 1052 01:24:36,650 --> 01:24:39,750 I was wondering what you thought about all the pornography we have. 1053 01:24:39,950 --> 01:24:44,550 Pornography. Uh... -I was wondering what you thought about it in our movies. 1054 01:24:44,750 --> 01:24:46,550 I've never seen any of your movies. 1055 01:24:46,750 --> 01:24:49,550 I mean our current American picture, which is loaded with smut. 1056 01:24:49,750 --> 01:24:50,950 Smut. Yes. -Uh, listen, could... 1057 01:24:51,150 --> 01:24:52,350 Smut. Yes. -Uh, listen, could... 1058 01:24:52,550 --> 01:24:54,650 Uh, attention, everybody. 1059 01:24:54,850 --> 01:24:59,350 Uh, uh, I guess you all know, uh, th-that was a call, uh... 1060 01:24:59,550 --> 01:25:01,650 from our, uh, New York office. 1061 01:25:01,850 --> 01:25:04,850 What did they say? -Oh, uh, Dad, um... 1062 01:25:05,050 --> 01:25:08,950 before we get into that, I... I think it might be nice, at this time... 1063 01:25:09,150 --> 01:25:11,650 to put everyone in the picture as to the background. 1064 01:25:11,850 --> 01:25:15,150 Uh, would you tell him to... -Shut up and get to the point. 1065 01:25:15,350 --> 01:25:17,150 The point is, Mrs. Breckinridge... 1066 01:25:17,350 --> 01:25:21,950 that no record of your husband's death exists in New York City or State. 1067 01:25:22,150 --> 01:25:24,150 Strike. -Just remember, Myra... 1068 01:25:24,350 --> 01:25:26,750 these people don't screw around. 1069 01:25:26,950 --> 01:25:28,750 Everything's legal and aboveboard. 1070 01:25:28,950 --> 01:25:33,350 Not like in some places I can mention south of the border down Mexico way. 1071 01:25:33,550 --> 01:25:37,650 Listen, I say the man's dead, you unmitigated shit. 1072 01:25:37,850 --> 01:25:39,850 And that means he's dead. 1073 01:25:40,050 --> 01:25:43,950 Oh, I 'll admit his body was never found. That's true. 1074 01:25:44,150 --> 01:25:46,550 He died in a car accident outside the Bank of America. 1075 01:25:46,750 --> 01:25:48,950 Fire! 1076 01:25:49,150 --> 01:25:53,350 Beverly Hills branch. -There is not one iota of evidence that he is dean'... 1077 01:25:53,550 --> 01:25:56,250 and we are not going to pay you one single penny. 1078 01:25:56,450 --> 01:25:58,600 Strike. 1079 01:25:59,950 --> 01:26:01,950 Randolph... 1080 01:26:02,150 --> 01:26:05,950 I believe the moment of truth has finally arrived. 1081 01:26:06,150 --> 01:26:08,450 Go get 'em. 1082 01:26:08,650 --> 01:26:10,750 Gentlemen... 1083 01:26:10,950 --> 01:26:13,150 I am Myron Breckinridge. 1084 01:26:13,350 --> 01:26:15,250 Uncle Buck, your fag nephew... 1085 01:26:15,450 --> 01:26:18,650 became your niece two years ago in Copenhagen... 1086 01:26:18,850 --> 01:26:21,150 and is now free as a bird and happy in being... 1087 01:26:21,350 --> 01:26:24,450 the most extraordinary woman in the world. 1088 01:26:24,650 --> 01:26:27,300 And I thought I fell in love with a man. 1089 01:26:30,600 --> 01:26:34,700 That's the ball game. 1090 01:26:45,600 --> 01:26:49,000 Uh, Stanley, what time is it? 1091 01:26:50,400 --> 01:26:52,450 It's about half past... 1092 01:26:52,650 --> 01:26:54,750 Something went wrong. 1093 01:26:54,950 --> 01:26:58,850 “Either you keep me on here, or l'll tell the world... 1094 01:26:59,050 --> 01:27:02,750 that Buck Loner's fag nephew became his niece two years ago in Copenhagen. “ 1095 01:27:02,950 --> 01:27:06,400 I could kill him. I could kill him if I could get away with it. 1096 01:27:06,600 --> 01:27:09,650 Strike that. Anyway, thank God... 1097 01:27:09,850 --> 01:27:13,200 I never slipped him the old Buck Loner special. 1098 01:27:26,800 --> 01:27:28,950 Myra, don't. It spoils it. 1099 01:27:29,150 --> 01:27:32,800 All right. Whatever you say, Mary Ann. 1100 01:27:38,800 --> 01:27:42,300 But I do love being with you like this. 1101 01:27:42,500 --> 01:27:44,650 I'm sorry, Myra. 1102 01:27:44,850 --> 01:27:46,650 I just can't. 1103 01:27:46,850 --> 01:27:49,100 I wish I could, really. 1104 01:27:50,300 --> 01:27:52,750 Love isn't always a matter of sex, you know. 1105 01:27:52,950 --> 01:27:57,600 Well, I know. And I really do love you as you are. 1106 01:28:00,200 --> 01:28:03,300 I even like it when you touch me. 1107 01:28:04,800 --> 01:28:06,800 Up to a point. 1108 01:28:09,200 --> 01:28:11,250 I don't know. 1109 01:28:11,450 --> 01:28:13,900 I just can't let myself go. 1110 01:28:15,000 --> 01:28:17,000 That's the way I am. 1111 01:28:17,200 --> 01:28:21,750 Well, is it Rusty? 1112 01:28:21,950 --> 01:28:24,100 No, that's finished. 1113 01:28:25,400 --> 01:28:28,350 But someone like him. 1114 01:28:28,550 --> 01:28:30,600 Someone gentle. 1115 01:28:33,700 --> 01:28:36,050 Rusty gentle? 1116 01:28:36,250 --> 01:28:38,550 I thought he was violent. 1117 01:28:38,750 --> 01:28:43,400 No. Whatever gave you that idea? 1118 01:28:43,600 --> 01:28:46,700 It's because he was so gentle that I loved him. 1119 01:28:48,700 --> 01:28:51,400 He never grabs you like the other boys. 1120 01:28:57,900 --> 01:29:00,850 Oh, you are an angel, Myra, and I do love you. 1121 01:29:01,050 --> 01:29:03,050 I really do. 1122 01:29:04,300 --> 01:29:06,700 I just can't, you know? 1123 01:29:09,900 --> 01:29:12,600 Yes. Of course. I know. 1124 01:29:15,200 --> 01:29:19,250 If only there were some man like you. 1125 01:29:19,450 --> 01:29:21,900 I'd really fall. l would. 1126 01:29:23,200 --> 01:29:25,300 But not like this. 1127 01:29:27,100 --> 01:29:29,300 If only you were a man. 1128 01:29:42,950 --> 01:29:44,950 l'll get you this time. 1129 01:29:45,150 --> 01:29:47,650 It's a dangerous thing, ambition. 1130 01:29:47,850 --> 01:29:50,500 Ruined Mickey Mouse's whole career. 1131 01:29:51,700 --> 01:29:54,850 Well, now it's eight bars and out, honey. 1132 01:29:55,050 --> 01:29:58,750 You were no more than a Linda Darnell paper doll. 1133 01:29:58,950 --> 01:30:01,750 A Disney cow that got over the fence. 1134 01:30:01,950 --> 01:30:03,750 You got ambitious. 1135 01:30:03,950 --> 01:30:07,450 You were great in CinemaScope and Technicolor... 1136 01:30:07,650 --> 01:30:10,400 but you can? cut it in black and white. 1137 01:30:18,100 --> 01:30:21,500 Magnificent! 1138 01:30:27,400 --> 01:30:29,400 Funny... 1139 01:30:31,900 --> 01:30:34,850 when I waited for you... 1140 01:30:35,050 --> 01:30:37,050 you didn't come. 1141 01:30:38,000 --> 01:30:40,250 But now you have come, and... 1142 01:30:40,450 --> 01:30:42,450 I must go away. 1143 01:30:53,500 --> 01:30:57,100 You will remember the day in the desert. 1144 01:30:59,200 --> 01:31:02,100 Fl! remember. 1145 01:31:46,400 --> 01:31:49,250 Where are my tits? Where are my tits? 1146 01:31:49,450 --> 01:31:53,250 Good morning, Nurse. 1147 01:31:53,450 --> 01:31:56,150 Ah, what have we got here? When you get to 103, sell. 1148 01:31:56,350 --> 01:31:58,150 There you go. 1149 01:31:58,350 --> 01:32:00,450 Hey, forty chin-ups, baby. 1150 01:32:00,650 --> 01:32:03,800 What are you doing, writing home for money? What are you saying there? 1151 01:32:04,000 --> 01:32:05,850 Hey, Dustin Hoffman. Midnight Cowboy. 1152 01:32:06,050 --> 01:32:07,850 Hi, Charlie. You're looking good. 1153 01:32:08,050 --> 01:32:10,250 Soul food here? Don't let 'em get down here, baby. 1154 01:32:10,450 --> 01:32:13,500 Oh, here, here. Watch that. You'll go crazy. 1155 01:32:14,450 --> 01:32:16,450 Huh? Are we conscious? 1156 01:32:16,650 --> 01:32:19,400 I am. I'm not sure about you. 1157 01:32:24,500 --> 01:32:27,650 The Lost Moment. -Uh, Martin Gabel, 1949. 1158 01:32:27,850 --> 01:32:30,050 '47. -'47. That's silly of me. 1159 01:32:30,250 --> 01:32:32,950 The Heiress was 1949. -The- that's Willy Wyler. 1160 01:32:33,150 --> 01:32:36,850 I thought of that because of Henry James. -Yes. 1161 01:32:37,050 --> 01:32:41,850 I want you to get a lot of rest before you start socializing. 1162 01:32:42,050 --> 01:32:44,500 You're a very popular young fella. 1163 01:32:58,500 --> 01:33:01,250 I'll turn around and I'll come back. 1164 01:33:01,450 --> 01:33:04,550 You wouldn't understand the way I feel about Mary Ann... 1165 01:33:04,750 --> 01:33:08,800 that she's Donald Duck straws and Pepsodent toothpaste. 1166 01:33:11,800 --> 01:33:15,800 Preuzeto sa www.titlovi.com 94977

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