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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:32,840 Fuck. 2 00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:35,960 Shit! 3 00:00:39,120 --> 00:00:41,419 - Hello? - Hi, Adam. It's Shruti, 4 00:00:41,420 --> 00:00:44,679 one of the SHOs. Sorry to disturb you. 5 00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:47,479 Erm, you're on the rota for labour ward today, 6 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,079 - and Mr Lockhart... - Er, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 7 00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:52,799 Erm, tell him I'm really sorry. 8 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:55,520 I think there's been an accident. I've been sat here for an hour... 9 00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:00,920 And I'll be there in a minute. 10 00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:04,599 Well, I'm not dead, am I? 11 00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:07,119 Please tell me you haven't ordered a coffin. 12 00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:10,279 Of course I'm not having an affair. I wouldn't have the time. 13 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:13,799 I just fell asleep last night when I went to the car. 14 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:16,639 Who did you phone? Please tell me you haven't phoned the police. 15 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:18,439 Well, who did you phone, then? 16 00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:19,999 Oh, sorry. 17 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,240 Who did you phone, then? 18 00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:24,080 My mum?! 19 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:27,959 Shit. Are you deranged? 20 00:01:27,960 --> 00:01:29,959 And what did she... ? 21 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:34,839 Don't go anywhere. I'm going to call you right back. 22 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:36,999 Is coming out! 23 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:38,519 Is coming out! 24 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:40,959 Well, a stroke of luck, you've come to the right place. 25 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:42,639 Let's get you up to labour ward, shall we? 26 00:01:42,640 --> 00:01:44,439 It's, erm, a bit of a walk, I'm afraid. 27 00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:48,119 Do you mind if I have a quick check? 28 00:01:48,120 --> 00:01:49,919 I'm a doctor. Probably should have said. 29 00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:51,359 I'm Adam. And you are... ? 30 00:01:51,360 --> 00:01:53,199 - Andrea. - Andrea. 31 00:01:56,240 --> 00:02:01,799 OK. OK, Andrea, so, erm, baby's arm 32 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:04,320 - has come out. - That is normal? 33 00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:08,279 Take a wild guess. Baby is lying sideways. 34 00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:10,879 Do you understand that? Sideways? 35 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:13,559 - So you need a Caesarean section. - Oh, Caesarean. 36 00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,159 I've got a scalpel in my back pocket. You'll be fine. 37 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:17,519 Shall we go? 38 00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:19,760 - Yeah. - Yeah? That's it. 39 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:23,519 That's it. You OK? 40 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:26,959 Erm, Andrea, I know a short cut. Let's go this way. 41 00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:28,679 I don't want to hurry you, Andrea, 42 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:31,159 but we've got to get going. You're doing brilliantly. 43 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:33,399 - It's OK. Deep breaths. - Mind yourselves! 44 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:35,479 Come on, then, quickly. Hurry up. 45 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,159 That's it, we're nearly there. 46 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,119 We're going to go up in the staff lift. 47 00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:41,360 Nearly there, nearly there. 48 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:45,180 - Come on. - This is lift? 49 00:02:45,181 --> 00:02:46,199 It's safe. Come on. 50 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:47,645 - Really? - Yeah. You can do it. 51 00:02:47,646 --> 00:02:49,079 - I can't! - Yeah, yeah. 52 00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:50,679 No, wait. Wait, wait. 53 00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:53,199 Wait for it. No, no, no. OK, are you ready? 54 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:55,999 Three, two, one. 55 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,519 Keep breathing. Nice deep breaths. 56 00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:00,759 When I say so, we're going to jump out of the lift. 57 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,159 Are you a real doctor? 58 00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:03,799 Fair question... 59 00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:05,959 ... though, strangely, one you've asked me 60 00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:07,679 after you showed me your vagina. 61 00:03:07,680 --> 00:03:10,519 Right, there you go. Yes? 62 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,679 OK, so, let's get ready. 63 00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:14,719 Get ready. 64 00:03:14,720 --> 00:03:17,399 And jump! Don't worry, don't worry. 65 00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:20,120 The lift will go round and we'll have another go. 66 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:23,959 - You're doing really well. - What's happening? 67 00:03:23,960 --> 00:03:25,599 It's just going through the... 68 00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:27,399 ... through the roof bit before it goes down. 69 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:30,359 All right? It'll be light again soon. 70 00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:32,520 - Something's wrong! Look! - OK. 71 00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:36,199 Jesus Christ. We call this a cord prolapse. 72 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,879 Ideally, it would happen on labour ward, not in a mad lift. 73 00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:41,479 OK, Andrea, everything's going to be fine. 74 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:42,999 I mean, it might be fine. 75 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,519 If the cord gets cold, then baby stops getting blood. 76 00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:47,479 No more blood, no more baby. 77 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:50,359 Right, hold it inside. You understand? Inside. 78 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,039 - Yeah. - Come on, come on, come on. 79 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:54,399 Are you the SHO? Staff lifts now. 80 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,279 Bring a hospital bed and a box of gloves. 81 00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:58,519 Literally now. Cord prolapse. 82 00:03:58,520 --> 00:04:00,839 Right, come on, Andrea, 83 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,319 we need to get off. Get ready. 84 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:03,450 - And jump! Jump! Jump! - Can't! 85 00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:04,451 Fuck it. 86 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:06,559 Come on. OK? 87 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:11,120 Andrea, stay there. 88 00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:14,759 Get her up on the bed. Knee-elbow position, 89 00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:16,559 replace the cord, get her round to theatre. 90 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,759 I'm going to change into some scrubs. You consent her. 91 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:21,399 - Consent her for... ? - A deep-tissue massage. 92 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:23,239 It's a cord prolapse! 93 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,479 - Caesarean! - Oh, well, when you say, 94 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:28,039 "knee-elbow position"... 95 00:04:28,040 --> 00:04:29,399 My mistake, sorry. 96 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,479 Your outfit looks a lot like what the doctors wear. 97 00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,119 I'll do this. You push the bed. 98 00:04:34,120 --> 00:04:35,480 Get up on here. That's it. 99 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:40,279 A bit less Alton Towers. 100 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:41,919 I'm so sorry. 101 00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:43,519 Why don't I drive? 102 00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:44,999 You go and find the anaesthetist. 103 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,039 That's the doctor that makes you go sleep-sleep. 104 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:50,039 I've found the husband. 105 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,559 He's just coming up from reception. 106 00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:53,270 OK, Andrea, this is going to be fine. 107 00:04:53,271 --> 00:04:54,400 You'll have a baby in five minutes. 108 00:04:54,500 --> 00:04:57,399 - And is free? - Yep, free. Completely free. 109 00:04:57,400 --> 00:04:59,079 We're not even allowed to accept tips. 110 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,799 Dr Adam, you should see me next. It's really urgent. 111 00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:05,239 - Really? - Erika, darling, can you just take a seat for me, please? 112 00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:08,799 Tracy! How was Majorca? Did Mick like the hotel? 113 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:10,479 Erika, just go back to triage. 114 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,719 I did explain that the doctor would be 115 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,879 holding the cord inside. 116 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,359 Probably didn't tell him I'd be wearing her like Kermit the Frog. 117 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:19,759 I don't understand. 118 00:05:19,760 --> 00:05:24,079 That's baby's heartbeat. Welcome to the NHS. 119 00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:34,920 This is obs and gynae. 120 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:37,440 Also known as brats and twats. 121 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,600 You're generally sailing the ship alone... 122 00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:45,319 ... a ship that's massive and on fire and no-one's had 123 00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:46,960 the time to teach you how to sail. 124 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:50,639 It's literally life or death here. 125 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:53,839 And you're constantly being splashed by bodily fluids. 126 00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:55,680 Not even the fun kind. 127 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:01,803 But what other doctors can say they end up with twice 128 00:06:01,804 --> 00:06:04,319 the number of patients they started with? 129 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,280 Beat that, geriatrics. 130 00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,639 Clothes bill means I'm... 131 00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:12,880 ... probably running my job at a loss, though. 132 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:28,759 Ah, Mr Lockhart. Having fun there? 133 00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:32,159 - I was just... - Yeah, I'm not entirely convinced I want to know. 134 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:34,239 I don't know if you heard, there was a massive 135 00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:35,839 cord prolapse before. 136 00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:38,599 Erm, crash section. Got the baby out in 90 seconds. 137 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:41,199 I heard that you rocked up ten minutes late, 138 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:43,759 nearly killed a patient in the maintenance lift, 139 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:46,879 then did a Caesarean section in casualwear. 140 00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:48,759 It was more that I took a short cut. 141 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:51,239 Doctors aren't meant to take short cuts, Adam. 142 00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:53,359 Remember when I asked you to be an acting registrar? 143 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:56,599 Can you try acting like a bloody registrar? 144 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,159 I'll be in my office if you need me, 145 00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:01,240 which I strongly suggest you won't. 146 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:04,800 You've missed a bit. 147 00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:16,880 Mind out, please, mind out. 148 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:30,199 - It's really urgent! - I know, petal, but I promise you 149 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,919 - the doctor won't be long. - Pinkie promise? 150 00:07:31,920 --> 00:07:34,119 Pinkie promise with a little cherry on top. 151 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,919 Oh! 152 00:07:35,920 --> 00:07:38,480 Why don't you head back to where you were sitting? 153 00:07:41,280 --> 00:07:42,409 Moany old trout. 154 00:07:42,410 --> 00:07:44,010 - Morning, Ria. - Morning, Dr Kay. 155 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,199 - Oh, there he is! - Ward round, Trace? 156 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,159 Can I ask you something personal, darling? 157 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:49,999 Is it, "Why do you look like shit this morning?" 158 00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:51,359 I wasn't going to ask it like that. 159 00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:52,759 I slept in my car last night. 160 00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:56,519 Well, it must be hard maintaining a relationship, 161 00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:58,319 what, with your job... 162 00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:00,839 ... and your personality. 163 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,399 Tracy's the head midwife on today. 164 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:05,560 I'd let her sew up my sister's perineum... 165 00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:08,439 ... which sounds weird, now that I've said it, 166 00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,239 but it's actually the highest compliment I can give. 167 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:12,719 Oh, remember to remove the thick, shiny layer on the outside. 168 00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:15,959 Ignore him. His girlfriend's come to her senses and dumped him. 169 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:18,759 - No-one's dumped anyone. - But if you do want to smack him, 170 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,559 I will turn a blind eye. 171 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:22,719 Do you mind if we nip to Room 8 first? 172 00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,199 She's making pretty slow progress. 173 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:28,239 Pop downstairs and review Mrs Buckstar quickly. 174 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:30,679 Doctors speak a lot of code, so it's "epididymo-orchitis" 175 00:08:30,680 --> 00:08:32,879 rather than "gammy cock and balls". 176 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:34,759 "Review Mrs Buckstar," "Go to Starbucks." 177 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,199 Which ward is Mrs Buckstar in? 178 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,679 He wants you to get him a fancy coffee without me knowing. 179 00:08:38,680 --> 00:08:41,240 Milk and one sugar for me, please. 180 00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:51,599 I'm in labour, Mother, not quadriplegic. 181 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:54,439 Hi. I'm Adam, one of the doctors. 182 00:08:54,440 --> 00:08:56,999 I'm afraid I've got some bad news. 183 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,640 You've spelt 'pavilion' wrong. 184 00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:03,839 Would you like a sweetie, dear? 185 00:09:03,840 --> 00:09:06,039 The doctor's not going to give me better care 186 00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:09,480 - because you offer him a Murray Mint. - In fairness, I might, actually. 187 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:14,920 All right? 188 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,239 You've got a little bit stuck at six centimetres, 189 00:09:20,240 --> 00:09:21,839 so I suggest we wang the dose up 190 00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:24,800 - on the drip that's helping your contractions... - Is "wang" a medical term? 191 00:09:24,801 --> 00:09:27,880 Sure is. And if that doesn't work, we'll, erm... 192 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:33,759 Anna, let's put the Synto onto 84 and re-examine in four hours. 193 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:35,679 It won't be me, actually. I'll be home by then. 194 00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:37,639 - Really? - Well, I've been here 15 hours. 195 00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:40,759 If I stay any longer, they'll start charging me council tax. 196 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:42,919 - Right. - Don't worry, darling, 197 00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:45,919 I'll do it, so at least it'll be a familiar face. 198 00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:47,919 Could you do the examination instead, Doctor? 199 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:51,159 It does make more sense for Tracy to do it. 200 00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:53,679 - Where did you train? - Would you like me to pop home 201 00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,199 and get my degree certificates? 202 00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:57,519 There's no way you could stay, is there? 203 00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:00,519 Erm, I'm not sure I like where this is going. 204 00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:02,119 You're not saying I can't choose who 205 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:04,079 does intimate examinations on me, are you? 206 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:06,639 I'm saying you won't be choosing based on the colour of their skin. 207 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:08,200 - Adam! - What? 208 00:10:08,201 --> 00:10:10,839 When did anyone say anything about skin colour? 209 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:12,359 It's called patient choice. 210 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,799 It's important to have choice, like tonight I might... 211 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:18,079 ... choose to order a pizza rather than firebomb a mosque. 212 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:19,759 I think what Dr Kay meant to say... 213 00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:22,519 What I'm saying is, I know it's stressful being on labour ward, 214 00:10:22,520 --> 00:10:24,799 but anything more like this, and I will have to have you 215 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:26,639 removed from the building. Is that understood? 216 00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:30,359 OK. OK, let's crack on, shall we? 217 00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:32,439 Wanker. 218 00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:34,199 That had better be a crossword answer. 219 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:36,560 No, dear, she called you a wanker. 220 00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:43,719 What the hell was all that about? 221 00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:46,399 I guess white supremacists have babies, too. 222 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:48,159 Not her. You. 223 00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:51,639 - Me? - I don't need a white knight to defend my honour. 224 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,159 Hang on. I'm the registrar. 225 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:54,759 Acting registrar. 226 00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:57,639 - I'm the most senior doctor here. - Until somebody more senior turns up. 227 00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:00,430 Well, I'm running this ward now, and it's up to me... 228 00:11:00,431 --> 00:11:04,079 No, I'm running this ward, young man, and I'm more than capable 229 00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,199 of handling myself, and the moment that I can't, 230 00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:07,839 I'll let somebody know, 231 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:11,359 and I don't want to spoil the surprise: it won't be you. 232 00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:13,999 And don't tell the patients that you're kicking them out. 233 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:16,279 This is the NHS, not your golf club. 234 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:17,919 Which room are we kicking out? 235 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:19,939 No, we're not kicking anybody out, Benilda. 236 00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:21,379 - _ - They're all in labour, so 237 00:11:21,380 --> 00:11:23,679 we thought we might wait until they had their babies. 238 00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:25,279 - _ - Well, get a move on. 239 00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:27,239 The hospital's on red alert for beds. 240 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,399 We're actually more than halfway to black alert. 241 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,960 So, like, dusky-merlot alert. 242 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,239 Can you, er, go to gynae? 243 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:37,959 The lady in bed 17's fit for home. 244 00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:40,559 I'm actually in the middle of a ward round. 245 00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:42,959 But, yeah, I mean, I'll find a moment. 246 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:44,824 Before you do that, you'll need to fill out an incident form 247 00:11:44,825 --> 00:11:46,477 - for Room 8. - Hang on, I didn't have to do one 248 00:11:46,478 --> 00:11:48,140 for the cord prolapse. 249 00:11:59,680 --> 00:12:01,879 - Erika? - Third attendance this week 250 00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:04,399 with non-specific symptoms. 251 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:07,399 OK, everybody, back to your jobs. We don't need the Polyphonic Spree. 252 00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,040 - Shoo, shoo. - Oh. Come on. 253 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,879 Not you! 254 00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:16,000 Oh! Oh, God, I'm so sorry. 255 00:12:17,120 --> 00:12:20,239 Right, surprise me. What's the management? 256 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,159 Right. Er... 257 00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:24,719 OK, well, I would, erm... 258 00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,519 ... check for a patent airway, 259 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:28,159 er, then I would put her 260 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:31,359 in the left lateral position, run high oxygen flow 261 00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,079 through a non-rebreather mask, erm, check for 262 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,359 a pulse... 263 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:37,600 So near and yet so shit. 264 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:41,400 So, when people are really unconscious... 265 00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:45,880 ... their hands smash into their faces. 266 00:12:52,161 --> 00:12:54,350 _ 267 00:12:54,351 --> 00:12:56,839 - _ - Adam? 268 00:12:56,840 --> 00:12:57,960 Adam! 269 00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:00,759 Adam? 270 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,679 Do you think I'm rubbish? 271 00:13:02,680 --> 00:13:04,959 Look, I wasn't great on my first week, either. 272 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,920 I've been here two months! 273 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:12,239 - Two months? - Well, I just haven't had a chance 274 00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:14,399 to do much hands-on stuff yet. 275 00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:16,039 How many babies have you delivered? 276 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:17,559 Erm... 277 00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:19,519 No babies have needed delivery in two months? 278 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:21,519 Everyone's always too busy to teach me. 279 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,079 You just need to be less of a wallflower. 280 00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:24,840 It's dog eat dog in this place. 281 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:27,160 And... 282 00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:29,560 ... the dogs eat wallflowers. 283 00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:34,199 Sorry, sorry, sorry. I've been elbow-deep in a patient, 284 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:37,599 I've had an ethnostate in Room 8 and someone else playing dead. 285 00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:39,759 Oh, and I've got blood matted into my pubes. 286 00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:41,399 I love it when you talk dirty. 287 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:42,999 Right, so, who did you say you were? 288 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,679 My name's Harry. 289 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:46,559 When you called my mother. 290 00:13:46,560 --> 00:13:48,360 I said I was your fuck buddy. 291 00:13:50,560 --> 00:13:51,919 I said I was your flatmate. 292 00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:53,799 But she knows we've only got one bedroom. 293 00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:56,239 Wild idea, but you know you could just... tell her about us? 294 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:58,519 You don't know her. She'll turn you into stone, or something. 295 00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:01,319 Nah. Mums love me. It's like my superpower. 296 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:03,159 How are we going to fake our own deaths, 297 00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:04,559 then, before Greg's stag do? 298 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,439 I'm thinking avalanche, helicopter crash... 299 00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:09,039 - Ah, it'll be a laugh. - Carbon-monoxide poisoning? 300 00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:11,039 Shouldn't you pop along, 301 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:13,439 - seeing as you're the best man? - Crap. I was meant to go to gynae. 302 00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,319 - Sorry, call you later. - Don't apologise. 303 00:14:15,320 --> 00:14:16,959 That's the longest call we've had in months. 304 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,600 I was starting to get bored. 305 00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:36,839 Erm, good news, Mrs W. 306 00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:39,040 You are finally free to go home. 307 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:43,560 Are you stupid? 308 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:47,479 I was told you were good to go, but, yeah, you don't look great. 309 00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,039 Speak for yourself. 310 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:52,919 Erm, must have been a bit of a mix-up. 311 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:55,559 I'll come back later. I need to see someone else now. 312 00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:57,160 Hopefully a hairdresser. 313 00:15:09,880 --> 00:15:11,439 Dr Kay, you're needed in Room 4. 314 00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:12,840 Yes, I know... 315 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:32,959 Never actually let the patient see the forceps. 316 00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:35,719 The only people happy with two-foot-long metal salad tongs 317 00:15:35,720 --> 00:15:37,919 inserted in their vaginas are people who aren't aware 318 00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,999 that there are two-foot-long metal salad tongs 319 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:41,239 inserted in their vaginas. 320 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:44,999 - It's only a few more minutes. - Shut up, Graham! 321 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,119 - And put your shirt back on. - Just breathe. 322 00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,119 That's what's important. 323 00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:51,199 You're doing so good. 324 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,519 You're doing so well. 325 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:55,759 You're doing so well, my little soldier! 326 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:58,680 - Shut up, Graham. - I'm going to play the song now. 327 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,805 Seen one before? 328 00:16:01,806 --> 00:16:04,919 - Yes... - See one, do one, teach one. 329 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,479 I don't like this song. 330 00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:07,880 Change the song, change the song. 331 00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:11,799 Wait for a contraction. 332 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:13,079 And pull. 333 00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:14,679 You got to keep breathing. 334 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,239 Just find your centre, baby. 335 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:19,599 - No stress. - Graham... 336 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:24,219 - Dr Kay speaking. - It's Greg. You've not answered 337 00:16:24,220 --> 00:16:26,759 any emails in four days. No-one even knows where we're meeting. 338 00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:30,159 - Push, push, push, push, push! - Pull as hard as you can! Now! 339 00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:31,879 Oh, God, tell me you're not having sex. 340 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,279 - Just on labour ward right now. - I know it's traditional 341 00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,599 for the best man to humiliate the groom on his stag do, 342 00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:39,559 and traditionally that involves handcuffs and a sex worker... 343 00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:41,119 Just put some oomph into it. 344 00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:43,399 Welly's threatening to take over and drag us all to a strip club. 345 00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:45,279 No, no, no, we won't be going to... breast clinic. 346 00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:47,239 If this doesn't work, will we have to do a Caesarean? 347 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:50,839 It will work. Erm, look, it's all going to be civilised, don't worry. 348 00:16:50,840 --> 00:16:53,319 You say, "Don't worry," but you'll understand why I am still worried. 349 00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,839 Tell everyone 8 o'clock upstairs at the Crown. 350 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:58,199 I'll see you later. I really need to get back to this vagina. 351 00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:00,519 Yeah, well, you're definitely not having sex, then. 352 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,319 You got to stay breathing, OK? 353 00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,199 That's it, that's it. You're doing brilliantly. 354 00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:05,919 - Thanks. - I was talking to the patient. 355 00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:08,879 Nice and slowly, nice and slowly. Don't let her tear. 356 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:11,679 - You're so beautiful! - Graham, just stop. 357 00:17:11,680 --> 00:17:13,039 Nice and slowly, nice and... 358 00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:16,439 Dad, do you want to come down and see baby being born? 359 00:17:16,440 --> 00:17:19,560 - Oh, my God, where's its face?! - What's the matter with his face?! 360 00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:23,839 His face is fine. 361 00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:25,799 Just on the front of his head, not the back. 362 00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:28,080 Remember I said, "Don't let her tear"? 363 00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:45,200 Adam's a good name. 364 00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:50,679 You've got a bit of a tear going into the back passage. 365 00:17:50,680 --> 00:17:52,559 We'll get you round to theatre, 366 00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:55,319 and have that repaired nicely for you. 367 00:17:55,320 --> 00:17:57,320 Won't take more than an hour or so. 368 00:18:37,560 --> 00:18:40,199 Adam, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've sewn it up myself. 369 00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:42,279 - I've just never actually done it... - It's fine. 370 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,319 Besides, my genitals were wondering why 371 00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:46,360 they hadn't been covered in blood for a few hours. 372 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:54,159 Better do an incident form. 373 00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:56,039 How are we doing here, then? 374 00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:57,559 All under control, Mr Lockhart. 375 00:18:57,560 --> 00:18:59,319 - Miracles never cease. - Could you just have... 376 00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:01,479 I thought I told you to discharge that gynae patient. 377 00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:02,879 I see the miracles have ceased. 378 00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:04,239 No. But she's not even... 379 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,879 Are my team causing you trouble, Ms Mendoza? 380 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:08,359 We're full on labour ward. 381 00:19:08,360 --> 00:19:10,639 Post-nates, ante-nates, gynae. I don't know how we're supposed 382 00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:12,759 to admit anyone from A&E. 383 00:19:12,760 --> 00:19:15,599 We've been on red alert all day, and we're practically at black alert. 384 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:18,719 Burgundy alert, then. 385 00:19:18,720 --> 00:19:20,919 I'm sure we can do something about that for you. 386 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:23,239 - Can't we, Dr Kay? - Yeah, we could pull out 387 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,479 the patient's drips, and chuck her out the window. 388 00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:27,039 I knew you'd think of something. 389 00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:29,479 - Leave it with us. - Can I help at all? 390 00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:31,479 You could pop down to the coffee shop. 391 00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,239 There's a vacancy for a barista. 392 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:36,639 Shruti did her first forcep delivery earlier. 393 00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:38,039 Er, yeah, yeah. 394 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:40,359 She had been in second stage for over an hour, and we... 395 00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:42,560 Very good. Walk with me, Adam. 396 00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:46,439 Quick story for you. 397 00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:48,559 So, there's this acting obstetric registrar, 398 00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:53,359 and he walks into a room and he calls his patient a Nazi. 399 00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:55,519 Oh, you're making it so much worse than it was. 400 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,839 - She was being racist to Tracy... - Every mother and baby 401 00:19:57,840 --> 00:20:00,359 on this ward is relying on your good decisions, 402 00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:03,279 and your good judgment. Apologise to Tracy, 403 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:05,039 apologise to the patient, 404 00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:06,760 and send some people home. 405 00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:09,959 Oh, and, Adam? 406 00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,839 Stop being shit. 407 00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:28,199 Rachel Glover? 408 00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:29,600 Kerry Salisbury? 409 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:32,840 Caroline Morobeto? 410 00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:08,279 So, you've recovered from earlier. 411 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:10,559 Oh, yes. Oh, God, sorry, Dr Adam. 412 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:11,919 I don't know what came over me. 413 00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:13,839 So, remind me, how many weeks are you? 414 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:16,159 Oh, God, I hate maths. 415 00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:19,559 I couldn't even tell you in months. Er... 416 00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:21,319 Erm, OK, let's think. 417 00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:24,279 So... Birthday's in June. 418 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:25,400 I'll be 27... 419 00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:30,040 Well, it's got to be, like, 2,000 weeks? 420 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:33,080 You're 25 weeks. 421 00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:36,279 Oh! 422 00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:37,679 You mean the baby. 423 00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:43,959 So, erm, what's the... problem? 424 00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:48,199 Well, I woke up this morning with a headache, 425 00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:52,239 and my tongue is just, like, totally covered in spots. 426 00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:54,040 Right. Let's have a look. 427 00:21:58,360 --> 00:22:00,080 OK. 428 00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:06,519 I'm afraid that what you have is known as... 429 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:08,320 ... taste buds. 430 00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:13,280 Oh. 431 00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:18,479 So, is there someone at home we can call 432 00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:20,239 to come and collect you, 433 00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:22,319 or do you live here now? 434 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,800 Oh, God, no, who'd want to live with me? 435 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:30,360 Right. 436 00:22:35,360 --> 00:22:38,319 Adam, that lady you just saw, her blood pressure's a bit high. 437 00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:40,959 - Do you want me to send her for some bloods? - Just send her home. 438 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:44,160 No, wait. Erm, yes, do the bloods. 439 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,120 Yep? 440 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,160 What's the trace like? 441 00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:54,880 Isn't the evening registrar here yet? 442 00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,599 OK. Fine. 443 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,839 Right, we're doing a Caesarean for Room 8. 444 00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,679 Dr Adam? Dr Adam, sorry, sorry, I meant to say. 445 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:06,999 My teeth have become a bit itchy. 446 00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,480 Send her home. 447 00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:11,639 Don't ask to do it. I'm tired. 448 00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:13,239 I need to be gone ten minutes ago. 449 00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:14,879 Erm, so, we're all good to go. 450 00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:16,439 We'll have baby out in five minutes, 451 00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:19,959 and may I just say, I misspoke before 452 00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:23,159 - and I'm very sorry. - All water under the bridge. 453 00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,159 But just checking it will be you doing this operation 454 00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,000 and nobody else. 455 00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:30,639 Yes. 456 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,280 Yes, it will. Yeah. 457 00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:41,319 Actually, fuck it. You've got to learn some time. You're up. 458 00:23:41,320 --> 00:23:43,199 - Come on, you've seen one. - Y... yeah... 459 00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:45,999 So you know the routine. See one, fuck one up, teach one. 460 00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:48,799 Really? Thank you. 461 00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,400 - Are you sure? - Not especially. Come on. 462 00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:01,240 Are you happy? 463 00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,160 Right, come on. 464 00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:09,399 - This it? - Yeah. Hurry up, please, 465 00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,840 I think the anaesthetist's retiring next week. 466 00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:18,479 - Adam? - Mm? 467 00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:20,959 Stretch it. Come on. Harder than that. 468 00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:22,840 Right, through the peritoneum, then. 469 00:24:24,880 --> 00:24:27,479 Pop your finger in. You're not going to damage anything. 470 00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:29,639 OK. 471 00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,080 Oh! 472 00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,039 Adam? Adam? 473 00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:39,719 Er, yeah, OK, good. Great. So, you're going to make 474 00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,279 a U-shape in the lower segment of the uterus, 475 00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,279 and then you're going to extend it with your fingers. 476 00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:45,879 What if there isn't a lower segment? 477 00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,119 You know, like if it's before 32 weeks. 478 00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:50,319 Yeah, we usually save the Q&A session for afterwards. 479 00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:52,999 It would just be a horrible, bloody mess. Come on, get on with it. 480 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:54,879 - Is that... ? - Good. 481 00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:56,399 Now what? 482 00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:58,599 I think even you can guess what happens next. Come on. 483 00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:00,279 That's it. 484 00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:02,320 Just guide the head out. It's coming. 485 00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:05,320 OK. 486 00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:08,280 That's it. 487 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:12,719 One baby coming up... 488 00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:19,999 No, get her off me. I'm not having a Paki 489 00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:22,079 delivering my baby! Get her off me! 490 00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:25,559 Stop touching it! You promised that you would do it! 491 00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:28,199 Excuse me, get me out of this! Take this! 492 00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:29,919 What is this? Get this off me! 493 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:32,240 - Adolf's a good name. - Mum, will you do something?! 494 00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:36,000 You did really well. 495 00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:39,600 One Caesarean down, 8,000 to go. 496 00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:43,399 To be fair, they don't normally end like that. 497 00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,720 Erm, write up the notes and mention that I closed the skin. 498 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:52,760 Oh, gosh, isn't he wonderful? 499 00:26:06,120 --> 00:26:07,760 Oh, for... 500 00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,199 Cancellations hotline. 501 00:26:15,200 --> 00:26:17,799 Press 1 for you need to stay at work, leaving me to make 502 00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:21,959 small talk with 20 public-school dickheads I barely know. 503 00:26:21,960 --> 00:26:25,079 That's unfair. There's only 15 of them. 504 00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:26,519 And I'm just leaving now. 505 00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:29,799 - No way! - Can you bring a change of clothes, please? 506 00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:32,239 Yeah. Anything in particular? 507 00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:33,439 Erm, something smart-casual 508 00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,239 and not totally encrusted with a stranger's blood? 509 00:26:36,240 --> 00:26:38,239 Hula skirt and feather boa it is, then. 510 00:26:38,240 --> 00:26:40,120 See you in a bit. 511 00:26:44,080 --> 00:26:45,959 You can't help being ill, darling. 512 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:48,319 I'll just get somebody else to pick her up. 513 00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:51,399 Right. Bye-bye. 514 00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:53,239 Er, Adam? 515 00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:55,199 I saw what you did to that dolphin. 516 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,279 A gentleman never discusses a lady's blowhole. 517 00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:59,599 - Do you want my advice, Adam? - Erm, not really. 518 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:01,239 That is exactly your problem. 519 00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:03,200 It was pretty funny, though, right? 520 00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,719 It's my second-favourite doctor! 521 00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:07,959 Who's number one? 522 00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:09,480 David Tennant. First series. 523 00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:15,639 - How was work? - Fine, thanks. Who are they? 524 00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:17,999 No idea, but they're better craic than your mates upstairs. 525 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:19,319 Oh, come on. 526 00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:21,479 I'm sure you'll find something in common with them. 527 00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:24,159 There you go. See? Wearing the same T-shirt. 528 00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:26,559 Some guy called... Welly brought them. 529 00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:29,160 Well, they're not too terrible, considering. 530 00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:34,840 Shall we just do this? Come on. 531 00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:44,599 Ah! 7:58. There you go. 532 00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,839 I knew you wouldn't let me down. 533 00:28:47,840 --> 00:28:51,559 - No, you didn't. - Yeah, fine. May have lost a small bet. 534 00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:53,959 Nightmare! This place doesn't do Jagerbombs! 535 00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:55,319 Whatever will we do? 536 00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:58,560 - Adster! - Welly. Don't do that. 537 00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:03,679 - Where's your T-shirt? - Yeah, Adster, where's your T-shirt? 538 00:29:03,680 --> 00:29:05,320 Put it on. 539 00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:08,839 Put it on. 540 00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:14,840 Put it on, put it on, put it on, put it on! 541 00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:18,119 Yes! And as for you... 542 00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,479 ... one pint of gin. 543 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:21,879 No, I'm not going to drink that. 544 00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:23,484 Well, you will be, because it's tradi-ti-on. 545 00:29:23,485 --> 00:29:25,839 How can it be a tradition? I've never got married before. 546 00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:28,479 Right, I need a drink. Is this my stuff? 547 00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:30,919 - So, did your mum call? - She left a voicemail. 548 00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:32,919 Ah. And you didn't listen. 549 00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:35,920 No. I'm changing my number and moving to Venezuela. 550 00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:38,959 You done there? 551 00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,319 Right, come on, what do you want? 552 00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:46,039 I think 12 litres of vodka Red Bull should probably do it. 553 00:29:46,040 --> 00:29:48,599 Er, can I get a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc and... 554 00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:52,959 - ... a rum and Coke, please? - This'll be Jakesy. 555 00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:54,959 He's probably gone to Poland by mistake. Hello? 556 00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:57,799 - Kay. - Mr Lockhart! I'm just in a... 557 00:29:57,800 --> 00:29:59,439 Pint of gin, pint of gin! 558 00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:01,159 ... supermarket. 559 00:30:01,160 --> 00:30:03,439 Sorry, Mr Lockhart, how can I help? 560 00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,279 Er, listen, the locum registrar 561 00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,760 hasn't turned up for the night shift. 562 00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:12,119 Erm... Who's the senior reg? 563 00:30:12,120 --> 00:30:15,080 Er, I don't think he'd get here from Sydney in time. 564 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,959 Well, do say if you've got something more important on. 565 00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:21,599 Erm, no. No, no, no. Erm... 566 00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:23,159 No, I can do it. 567 00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:24,920 Will the missus understand? 568 00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,599 - She'll be fine with it. - Good man. Bye! 569 00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:41,079 How long are you going to be? A couple of hours? 570 00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,880 - 12. I'm so sorry. - And there's no-one else who could... ? 571 00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:48,960 I'm sorry. It's really crap for you. 572 00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:56,199 - You don't have to stay here, obviously. - I'll be grand. 573 00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,160 I've never had a... pint of gin before. 574 00:31:00,320 --> 00:31:02,759 Just a couple more years, then I'll be a consultant, 575 00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:05,159 and it'll just be me, you and an Aston Martin. 576 00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:08,319 It would be nice to live somewhere a bit more spacious. 577 00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:10,358 - We can shower in the glove compartment. - Right, go on. 578 00:31:10,359 --> 00:31:12,200 You've got some babies to deliver. 579 00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,639 You should have gone along with my avalanche idea. 580 00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:20,399 OK, your first best-manly duty is to rescue my dad. 581 00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:23,319 Welly's trying to get him to drink a shoe full of sambuca. 582 00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:25,280 Shoe-ca! Shoe-ca! 583 00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:30,039 You're going to hate me. 584 00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:32,719 There's a... staffing emergency at the hospital. 585 00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:34,399 There's no doctors on labour ward. 586 00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:35,725 - No. - So I have to go back in. 587 00:31:35,726 --> 00:31:38,060 Drink this. Then you can't go in. 588 00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:43,039 - I can't. - OK, give me one good reason. 589 00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:44,479 Er... 590 00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:47,520 - Er, because I, erm... - Because you'd rather be at work. 591 00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:50,400 Yeah, have a good night, mate. 592 00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,080 Fuck's sake! 593 00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:46,959 Do you want the good news or the bad news? 594 00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:49,399 - Erm, the good. - Oh, I was worried you'd say that. 595 00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,199 It's all bad, I'm afraid. 596 00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:52,959 The wards are stuffed to the gills, 597 00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:56,599 there's no SHO, and the midwife in charge is Tracy. 598 00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:58,759 - Well, she was working during the day. - The other one. 599 00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:01,959 "Non-Reassuring Trace." 600 00:33:01,960 --> 00:33:03,759 Right, I'm off home. But call me whenever. 601 00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:05,640 - I won't. - Good man. 602 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:10,159 You're very intent on showing me your penis today. 603 00:33:10,160 --> 00:33:13,308 They need to increase the credits on the scrub machine. 604 00:33:13,309 --> 00:33:15,141 You can practically tell who did your circumcision. 605 00:33:15,142 --> 00:33:17,000 Made a right meal of it. 606 00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:23,240 Keep going. 607 00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:32,279 - Hi, Trace. How can I help? - Oh, Doctor, thank God you're here. 608 00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:34,279 Can you see Room 11 for me? 609 00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:36,759 I'm desperately worried about her. 610 00:33:36,760 --> 00:33:39,159 Quick as you can. 611 00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:04,520 Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing. 612 00:34:05,840 --> 00:34:09,159 No, I didn't take a photo! It's someone else's baby! 613 00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:11,839 Yeah, I know, Mum said the exact same thing. 614 00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:14,159 Actually, I'm not going to make it home this weekend, 615 00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:16,919 but, erm... 616 00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:20,559 Mm-hm. Yeah, erm, I love you, too. OK. Bye. 617 00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:21,919 Bye. 618 00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:23,879 What the hell are you still doing here? 619 00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,479 Don't you have a depressing flat to go back to? 620 00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:28,759 The incident forms are longer than you think. 621 00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:30,399 Just go home. 622 00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:32,919 I'll do yours when I do mine. 623 00:34:32,920 --> 00:34:35,039 - This is yours. - Oh, no way! 624 00:34:36,560 --> 00:34:39,319 I wouldn't break a sweat. Non-Reassuring-Tracey's on. 625 00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:41,159 The patient's probably farted. 626 00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:49,319 25 weeks. First baby. 627 00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:52,159 Blood pressure's through the roof. 628 00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:55,039 Grade one Caesarean section. 629 00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:56,879 Get anaesthetics round to theatres now. 630 00:34:56,880 --> 00:34:59,639 Tell paeds it's a 25-weeker with placental abruption. 631 00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:01,479 Severe pre-eclampsia. 632 00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:03,519 Turns out I probably shouldn't have sent her home. 633 00:35:03,520 --> 00:35:06,559 Erika, listen. I'm very worried about your baby. 634 00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:08,879 Placenta's coming away. I need to deliver you immediately 635 00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:10,679 to save baby's life. 636 00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:13,599 - It's too early! - I'm going to perform a Caesarean section. 637 00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:15,960 Do you understand? 638 00:35:18,920 --> 00:35:20,519 Do you want your consultant in? 639 00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:22,280 I've got this, thanks, Tracy. 640 00:35:23,360 --> 00:35:26,319 - Is my sister here? - We've called her, and she'll be here in time 641 00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:28,839 - to say hello to your baby. - Or goodbye. 642 00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:32,639 Why don't you count down from 20 for me? 643 00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:35,159 20, 19... 18... 644 00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:36,760 Come on. 645 00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:40,679 - Are you happy? - Ready when you are. 646 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,559 - Adam, have you done a 25-week Caesarean before? - No. 647 00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:45,120 I've seen one. 648 00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,920 Pull. Quick. And retractor in. 649 00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:48,559 Adam? 650 00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:51,359 - Yeah, chest movement. - Adam? 651 00:36:51,360 --> 00:36:54,439 - Adam! - Er, sorry. Swabs, please. 652 00:36:54,440 --> 00:36:56,280 Let's start the suction. 653 00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:05,240 Oh, my God. 654 00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:09,319 Come on. Shit. 655 00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:12,119 Pressures aren't great here. What's the blood loss like? 656 00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:13,959 Er, it's a litre, a litre-and-a-half. 657 00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:16,079 Can you bleep the on-call haematologist? 658 00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:18,879 I'm going to need some more blood products. 659 00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:21,600 Find out who's the anaesthetic consultant. 660 00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:24,560 More swabs. 661 00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:31,839 I-I can't see anything. It's too thick to stitch. 662 00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:34,519 So much blood. Shit, I can't... 663 00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:36,359 I... I can't get it under... 664 00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:37,799 Fuck! 665 00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:40,959 This is insane. I can't... I can't see anything. Shit! 666 00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:42,559 - Fuck! - Adam... 667 00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:44,239 ... you can do this. 668 00:37:44,240 --> 00:37:45,800 I can't. I can't do this. 669 00:37:46,880 --> 00:37:49,439 This woman's going to die, and it's my fault. 670 00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:51,320 Shall we get Mr Lockhart in? 671 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:58,559 - Yeah. Yeah, please. - Tracy, will you call Mr Lockhart 672 00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,079 and ask him to come in, please? 673 00:38:00,080 --> 00:38:02,050 I called him before you started. 674 00:38:02,051 --> 00:38:03,160 Why did you do that? I... 675 00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:06,160 Thank you. 676 00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:57,480 I'm really sorry. 677 00:39:04,080 --> 00:39:06,079 It was really busy, 678 00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:08,719 and I genuinely thought that she was crying wolf. 679 00:39:08,720 --> 00:39:11,799 She was crying severe early-onset pre-eclampsia, 680 00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:15,519 which you'd have known if you'd done so much as a blood test. 681 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:18,119 And then, for some reason, you attempted an operation 682 00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:20,160 any consultant would struggle with. 683 00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,119 Oh, you can buy Tracy a box of chocolates, by the way, 684 00:39:24,120 --> 00:39:25,760 for calling me in. 685 00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:31,360 - Can I just say... ? - No! 686 00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:39,200 Amend your entry from when you first saw this patient this afternoon. 687 00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,319 Write that you discussed with me over the phone, 688 00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:46,399 and that I advised you to send her home. 689 00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:48,319 What? 690 00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:50,479 No, you don't have to do that. 691 00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:52,560 Well, you didn't have to come in tonight. 692 00:39:55,280 --> 00:39:56,800 - I did. - Yeah, you did. 693 00:40:10,240 --> 00:40:12,719 Hi. Um... 694 00:40:12,720 --> 00:40:14,600 ... something to keep you going. 695 00:41:05,401 --> 00:41:08,862 _ 696 00:41:46,440 --> 00:41:50,280 Hi. I'm one of the obstetric, erm, registrars. 697 00:41:51,240 --> 00:41:53,559 Are you lost? 698 00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:55,599 Erm, I'm looking for... 699 00:41:55,600 --> 00:41:57,639 ... baby Van Hegan. The 25-weeker. 700 00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,520 Ah! Are you the one who, er... ? 701 00:42:04,160 --> 00:42:07,200 Well, you're not going to knock over the incubator, are you? 702 00:42:08,520 --> 00:42:09,880 Bed 5. 703 00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:40,119 I'm really sorry. 704 00:42:40,120 --> 00:42:44,040 I was... really tired, and I just wanted to get home. 705 00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:48,480 And... this place is insane. 706 00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:51,639 And... 707 00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:53,159 ... I fucked up. 708 00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:55,359 I mucked up. 709 00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:57,639 Sorry. 710 00:42:57,640 --> 00:42:59,400 I tried my best. 711 00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:06,000 Just promise me you'll have a normal head scan. 712 00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:26,960 Enjoy your last night of pussy. 713 00:46:18,281 --> 00:46:23,281 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 54332

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