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APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
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Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,
and welcome back to
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00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,440
Play of the Week, where each week
a new play is performed
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00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:19,720
live in front of a studio audience
and broadcast to the nation.
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00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:23,920
I am Chris Bean,
the fully reinstated director.
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00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:28,880
Following Robert's ambitious
turn as director last week,
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00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:31,240
the cast came crawling back to me
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00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:36,080
and I graciously agreed to take on
the mantle of director once more.
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00:00:36,080 --> 00:00:41,040
Which reminds me... Robert, here
are your new lines for this evening.
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00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:44,280
This is blank. Yes, it is.
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00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:48,360
Robert and I mutually agreed
it would be best for him
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00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:51,920
to play only non-speaking
roles this evening.
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00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:56,280
Tonight's piece is a classic by
the great playwright Shakespeare.
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To be clear,
that's Simon Shakespeare,
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00:00:58,800 --> 00:01:01,880
the much less well-known and
much less well-regarded cousin
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00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:03,520
of Colin Shakespeare.
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00:01:04,920 --> 00:01:09,040
So, the actors are prepared,
the stage is set.
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00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:10,440
Please enjoy
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The Most Lamentable Tragedy
Of The Prince Of England
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00:01:12,960 --> 00:01:15,480
And His Long-lost Twin Brother
Prince Regent Of France
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And The Problems Therein
Experienced By All
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When They Came To Know Of
One Another After A Battle.
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APPLAUSE
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00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:25,120
FANFARE
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00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:35,640
GONG REVERBERATES
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00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:42,560
A noble king is tended by his wife.
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00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:44,760
Advanced in years,
he nears the end of...
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00:01:44,760 --> 00:01:47,040
GONG
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00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:48,320
..life.
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00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:50,760
His kingdom disembowelled
by bloody war,
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where death doth stalk
from midland to...
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00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:54,080
GONG
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00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:56,440
..the shore.
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00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:04,160
Prince Richard,
who was out of wedlock birthed,
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00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,960
carries his father's name
but not his worth.
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00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:17,480
Queen Isobel would
his blood soon spill.
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00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:20,200
Foul Malcolm plots
and for the throne...
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00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:24,920
...he'd kill.
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00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:34,680
With the fair lands
in turmoil up and down,
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00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:38,440
all men do scheme to try
and seize the throne...
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00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:39,480
Crown.
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00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:43,840
All hail the King!
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00:02:43,840 --> 00:02:45,760
FANFARE
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00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,560
TRUMPET PARPS
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00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:11,120
A merry trumpet and a bold.
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00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:16,440
But embolden me it doth not, for
the body of the king doth canker.
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00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:18,120
What medicine, my love?
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00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:24,000
For me, there is none. For the
kingdom, the remedy be my heir.
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His heir Richard is no better
than air itself,
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born as he was of
a lowly tavern strumpet.
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No son of mine is he.
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Call forth Eric the Jester.
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Eric the Jester!
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00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,880
My liege, you call me forth
but my name is Eric
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and I am first amongst your court.
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BELLS JINGLE
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00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:49,160
ALL CHUCKLE
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00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:51,240
ROBERT GUFFAWS LOUDLY
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00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:58,160
Good Eric, I called thee
to tell you I do ail.
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00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:00,200
My Lord, we all do ale!
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00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:03,160
And at celebration we may wine too.
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00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:05,680
ALL CHUCKLE
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00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:09,880
ROBERT GUFFAWS
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00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:18,920
Bring forth...
Bring forth...
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..the King's...
..the King's...
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..brother!
..brother!
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00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:24,840
FANFARE
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00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:43,760
What news, good....
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00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,360
MUFFLED GRUNTING
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MUFFLED: What news, good brother?
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00:04:57,720 --> 00:05:00,520
No news but thy impertinence,
Malcolm.
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Kneel before your King.
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LOUD CREAKING
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00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:17,120
Nay, Malcolm.
Let us speak as brothers!
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Stand.
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00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:21,640
CREAKING
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00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:26,320
Whoa...
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00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:33,320
I know my throne
thou covet for thyself.
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00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:36,760
MUFFLED SPEECH
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00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:39,480
Nay, Malcolm, if Richard
doth beat the French down,
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00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:42,280
it will be him, not you,
that takes the crown.
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00:05:42,280 --> 00:05:45,360
Call forth Prince Richard!
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Bring forth...
Bring forth!
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..Prince...
Prince!
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..Richard!
Dick!
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You called for me, father?
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TRUMPET PARPS
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00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:05,080
My days grow short, young Richard,
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00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:08,200
and soon this crown
shall pass unto thy head.
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STRAINING
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00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:31,440
Behold its dignity and pomp.
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00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:36,280
I shall go forth to war
and prove my sword is true.
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00:06:36,280 --> 00:06:41,320
Well, if thou tastes victory,
this crown shall pass to you.
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00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:43,400
Come, we shall...
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00:06:41,320 --> 00:06:43,400
SCREAMS
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00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:57,200
P...p...prithee,
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00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,160
where be my man penis?
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00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:01,960
Tis vanish-ed.
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00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:07,480
The...the spirits must
have frowned upon it!
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00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:13,840
And what are these...benetted baps?
They...
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00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:21,000
I must go consult the priest
before any more of me is...
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00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:25,960
..released.
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00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,240
FANFARE
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00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:40,800
And the court thought he was
but an irrelevant trumpeter,
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00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,680
but you shall soon see
I am most relevant!
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00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:44,960
Non-speaking!
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00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,200
FANFARE
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00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:57,160
Oof!
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00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:59,120
MUFFLED GROANING
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00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:03,680
I will not see that boy
seated upon the throne.
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00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:06,320
I'd rather see
the kingdom in your hand.
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00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,440
MUFFLED: Good, my lady...
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00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:11,840
MUFFLED: You will be my queen.
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00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:15,920
Oh, thou speakest poetry
and my heart doth melt.
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00:08:15,920 --> 00:08:20,200
Now we're alone,
spare me one secret kiss.
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One secret kiss.
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00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:27,840
We're alone.
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00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:31,480
No, you're not.
Yes, we are...prithee.
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00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,960
She wants you to leave. Get off!
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00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:38,240
BELLS JINGLE
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00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:46,280
One secret kiss.
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00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:51,760
Come on... Just...
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00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:51,760
MUTTERING
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00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:10,800
Now we must be gone before
the King sees aught's amiss.
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00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:24,600
And now away from
the King's fine court
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to a field where a bitter
battle is fought.
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Each man covered in sweat and blood
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00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:34,960
and every one prepared to die
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00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:37,000
for the common...
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00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,520
..gud.
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00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:47,440
Argh!
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00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:50,520
GRUNTING
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00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,440
Argh! Argh!
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00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:57,520
ARGH!
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00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:01,720
Cannon! Cannon!
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00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:04,080
Load! Load!
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00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:05,200
Aim!
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00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:06,760
Ooh!
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00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:08,200
Oof!
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00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:12,960
How fare you, sirrah?
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00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:18,200
Er... Suf-FER-ing GREAT-ly
AT the FRENCH-man's HAND
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00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:22,200
but WHO come-ETH yon-DER hill-TOP?
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A man.
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00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:28,720
Tis Richard, our great prince,
upon his steed.
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00:10:28,720 --> 00:10:30,960
What ho, fine friends.
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00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:35,560
Steel your courage and stick it to
your brother's back for we are one.
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00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:37,000
Hurrah!
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00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:38,160
HOO-ray!
149
00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:41,160
Yes! Hooray! Huzzah!
150
00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:47,400
Bravery rule thy head, let valour
be thy light! Bravery...
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00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:49,880
Oh, oh... Ah... Aaaaah...
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00:10:49,880 --> 00:10:52,160
Dinky! Dinky! Come back!
Come back here...
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All fight! Fight for good Richard!
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00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:56,400
Get 'em! Kill the French!
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00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:58,720
England forever! Charge!
156
00:11:00,440 --> 00:11:02,680
Oh, look! They're charging!
157
00:11:02,680 --> 00:11:05,840
Get them! Kill the English!
France forever!
158
00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:08,760
But wait, I cannot fight,
I am a pacifist!
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00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,440
A pacifist?
Why are you here?
160
00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:12,040
I have to earn a living, don't I?
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00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:13,160
What do you do?
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00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:14,960
I'm a court trumpeter,
but the pay is not enough.
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00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:17,720
You're a court trumpeter pacifist
who's been forced to go to war?
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00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:18,920
I am.
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00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:21,160
What a layered
and interesting man you are.
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00:11:21,160 --> 00:11:22,360
I agree.
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00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:23,800
Do you have a song that might
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00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:25,600
outline your predicament
in more detail?
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00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:26,680
I do, sirrah.
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00:11:26,680 --> 00:11:31,800
# Oh, when I was a young trumpeter
Hey-oh, hey-oh... #
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Non-speaking!
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00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:37,600
GRUNTING
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00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:48,640
Curses! Another eager Englishman
bearing bloody blade draws near.
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00:11:48,640 --> 00:11:51,160
LOUD SCRAPING
It is the foul Lord Buckingham
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00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:52,680
whom we Frenchmen do fear.
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What ho, Prince Richard!
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00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:59,320
He thinks me English like himself.
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00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:02,400
He calls me Richard.
What trickery is this?
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00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:06,240
A fine battle we have won today
and we raise our arms victorious.
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00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,040
CLANG
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00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:21,800
The sun shines bright
upon our deeds.
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00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:24,640
These noble trees shall bear
witness to our glory.
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00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:28,120
And yet I am no tree!
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00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:31,640
I am the relevant trumpeter,
disguis-ed!
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00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:39,360
Prince Richard, why wearest thou
a Frenchman's cap upon thy pate?
186
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:43,360
Thou art sure to draw the eye of our
own archers in this behatted state.
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00:12:43,360 --> 00:12:48,240
Buckingham! My father shan't deny
that this dost prove my worth!
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00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:50,720
God's teeth, I see my prince
and there his shade
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00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:52,240
as though a mirror were here before.
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00:12:52,240 --> 00:12:55,200
By Jove, who art thou?
We are one and the same.
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00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:56,600
I am Prince Richard.
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00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,840
WHISPERS: Dick...
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00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:02,760
Who art thou, sir?
194
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:06,000
What ho!
His voice is the echo of mine.
195
00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:08,600
Mine every syllable
dost sound as thine.
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00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:11,440
My ears deceived both,
they sound alike.
197
00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:14,320
From whence do you hail?
Come take my hand-e!
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00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:20,560
I shall not, sir.
199
00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:22,440
I am Prince of...
200
00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:23,880
..Eng-land-e!
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00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:31,440
ODD ACCENT: Some magic trickery.
How can this be?
202
00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:37,000
MIMICKING ACCENT: His every
feature doth mirror me.
203
00:13:38,960 --> 00:13:41,880
Identical except in...BIRTH!
204
00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:47,200
Same voice, same height,
205
00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:48,720
same...GIRTH!
206
00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:59,240
Our gestures knit, each hair in
pla-ace-ay-ay-hey-hey-HEY-HEY-HEY!
207
00:13:59,240 --> 00:14:01,360
AY-hey!
208
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:09,640
It is as if the devil stole my...
209
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:15,760
..fa-ace-ay-ay-hey-hey-HEY-HEY-HEY!
210
00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:26,120
And I'm playing a tree? Seriously?
211
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:30,040
Bind this fellow, lock him away.
212
00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:32,480
I shall to my father this very day.
213
00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:33,840
Lower the bridge!
214
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:36,080
Argh!
215
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:37,880
Raise the bridge! Raise the bridge!
216
00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:39,600
Ah... Lower the bridge!
217
00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:41,760
Ah...
218
00:14:55,320 --> 00:14:58,960
Push it up! Lift it!
Push it up! Lift it up!
219
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:04,040
THEY SHOUT
220
00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:10,280
Three, two, one, go!
221
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:11,320
KING SCREAMS
222
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:22,240
The battle won
by England's merry throng.
223
00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:26,440
Good Eric, toast their health
and give a song!
224
00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:28,120
MEDIEVAL TUNE PLAYS
225
00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:36,440
# Bonny Peggy Ramsay
that any man may see
226
00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:39,800
# Bonny was her face
Fair freckled was she
227
00:15:39,800 --> 00:15:43,040
# Hey, nonny, nonny
Hey, nonny, nay!
228
00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:46,320
# With a slap of my thigh
I will dance all the day!
229
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,800
ALL: # With a slap of his thigh
he will dance all the day! #
230
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:52,160
Ooh!
231
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,280
THEY CLAMOUR
232
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:55,840
Argh! Argh!
233
00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:09,080
# There was a goose
that was porked by a ham
234
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:12,880
# I have a sausage, as I am a man
235
00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:15,800
# He has a sausage, as he is a man
236
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:19,160
# The goose was in charge
I drank to its health
237
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,680
# Then I took off my trousers
and showed it myself
238
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:25,840
# He took off his trousers
and showed it himself... #
239
00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:28,440
This is a most pleasing tune.
240
00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:32,080
Oh, prithee, more.
What happened to Bonny Peggy Ramsay?
241
00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:37,640
# Erm...
242
00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:40,920
# Bonny Peggy came back
and what did she see?
243
00:16:40,920 --> 00:16:44,600
# The goose it was nude
and laying with me
244
00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,680
# The goose it was nude
and laying with he
245
00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:51,320
# It was the first time
It shan't be the last
246
00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:53,840
# I put my sausage
in the goose's... #
247
00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:57,960
Prithee, no more, Fool! That's...
that's quite enough. Thank you.
248
00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:00,640
What a charming diversion, Fool.
More goose, my love?
249
00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:03,280
No!
250
00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:06,640
I have lost the taste
for it, methinks.
251
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:08,000
Father!
252
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:09,520
What is the meaning of this?!
253
00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:12,560
Upon our fighting in your name
did I happen upon this man,
254
00:17:12,560 --> 00:17:14,040
the very shadow of me.
255
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,720
Bless my soul.
256
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:20,040
Two sons now before me -
mine own and this, his brother.
257
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:23,280
So you confess, this man is my kin?
How came this to be so?
258
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:26,720
Alack, I must at last
confess my sin.
259
00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:30,400
Your mother was no strumpet but
Queen Eleanor of France herself.
260
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,800
DRAMATIC GASP
261
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,800
Stop it.
262
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:34,480
Our kingdoms both at war,
263
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:38,520
you were born in secret, brought
to be raised under mine eye,
264
00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:41,880
whilst he, your twin,
remained with her.
265
00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:44,040
I hope that all shall now be healed,
266
00:17:44,040 --> 00:17:47,120
at last this wicked truth revealed.
267
00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,160
And fortune hath united you.
268
00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:02,760
So you and I are brothers of
both French and English blood.
269
00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:04,080
To me.
270
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:07,840
So you and I are brothers of
both French and English blood.
271
00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:10,080
Father, at last our war can end.
272
00:18:10,080 --> 00:18:11,280
Not to me.
273
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:13,840
Father, at last our war can end.
274
00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,760
Yet some wounds be too deep to mend.
275
00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:32,840
A blood moon rose, portending doom.
276
00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:38,880
For foul and bloody murder loomed.
277
00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:41,120
As the King retired
to bed that night,
278
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:43,640
he did not know he'd
seen his final light.
279
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,760
GONG CLANGS
280
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,760
AHHHH!
281
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:02,880
My father for his sins
shall now atone.
282
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,040
Then I, Prince Richard...
283
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,480
WHISPERS: Dick...
284
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:10,360
..shall not share the throne.
285
00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:16,000
A single drop of poison in thine ear
will rob thee of thy health.
286
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:21,200
Approach I now
in silence and in stealth.
287
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:22,600
THUD, SHATTERING
288
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,480
Come, subtle poison...
289
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:44,800
Come, subtle poison, do thy work.
290
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:45,840
SHRIEK
291
00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:47,320
Sorry! Sorry!
292
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:51,000
The king is dead,
293
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:54,280
but I'll not bear the guilt.
294
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:58,280
I'll frame fair Louis,
then run him to the hilt.
295
00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:02,320
Treachery! Foul treachery!
296
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,920
What news is this?
297
00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:06,800
The Frenchman Louis
hath killed the king!
298
00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,120
What ho?
299
00:20:08,120 --> 00:20:10,120
The king is dead!
300
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:11,520
BELLS JINGLE
301
00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:15,240
My father dead,
302
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:16,560
reluctant...
303
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:22,320
..I am king.
304
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:27,920
Now to the tower we shall
this traitor bring. Guard!
305
00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:29,920
My liege!
306
00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:31,240
Take him away.
307
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:35,160
Yet foolish Richard
knew not I was no guard.
308
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,400
I was the relevant trumpeter!
309
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:38,720
Robert!
310
00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,000
Adieu.
311
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:43,200
Foul trickery, villainy.
Thou art knaves!
312
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:46,560
Come, Eric, wake the castle,
assemble the court!
313
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,400
All must hear of
Louis' wicked sport.
314
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:50,640
My lord.
315
00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:54,400
Aside. I spy upon his hand
a stain of poison green.
316
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:57,880
No. It's an aside -
say it to the side.
317
00:20:59,160 --> 00:21:02,400
I spy upon his hand
a stain of poison green.
318
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:05,320
No. To the side!
319
00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:08,920
I spy upon his hand
a stain of poison green.
320
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:11,320
I must betray this message
to my Queen.
321
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:13,960
Go, then!
322
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:22,320
My Queen, I bid thee brace
thyself for news most foul.
323
00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:25,160
Prithee, tell me
the cause of thy scowl.
324
00:21:25,160 --> 00:21:29,120
Tarry a moment for, erm...for,
erm...
325
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,560
..tis about the King.
326
00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:38,200
Prithee, tell me.
327
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,880
Tis it about the king?
328
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:44,400
Yes. Methinks it is.
329
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:47,640
You bring me news
of the King's health?
330
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:49,360
Methinks...
331
00:21:49,360 --> 00:21:51,920
Methinks...the King is well.
332
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:53,920
Nope. The King is dead. Mm-hm.
333
00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:56,040
Aye! The King is well dead.
334
00:21:57,760 --> 00:22:00,200
But the worst is still
to come for, er...er...
335
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:02,960
Speak, Fool!
336
00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:04,520
Oh, it's the twist.
337
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:07,600
Ay! He was murdered by Chris.
338
00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:13,280
Prithee, but who doth Chris play?
339
00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:14,520
The King.
340
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:17,440
Nay. The king didn't
kill the king, did he?
341
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:20,720
But he...he said he was the King...
methinks.
342
00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:23,000
Yes, well, he's the King now
343
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:26,280
but before he killed
the King, who was he?
344
00:22:26,280 --> 00:22:30,480
Chris. No! That's reality.
345
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:32,960
Join me in fiction...
346
00:22:36,120 --> 00:22:38,920
In the play, who is Chris?
347
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:40,360
The director.
348
00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:42,800
No! Which character?
349
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:44,640
Was't he Richard?
350
00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:46,600
No. Yes, he was.
I thought he was Louis.
351
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:49,040
No, he's Richard. They are twins.
352
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:50,600
But they don't look the same.
353
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:55,040
They're not... Why are you confused!
354
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,960
I don't even want to be
in this scene.
355
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:02,320
Just... Look...
356
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:06,040
My goodly fool,
my heart in pieces
357
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:09,280
tides thee submit
gentle Malcolm hither.
358
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:11,840
What? Get Malcolm!
Get Malcolm! Get Malcolm!
359
00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:13,480
All right, all right, all right!
360
00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:19,240
Oh, double joy, for now
King Walter's dead,
361
00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:22,840
his heir shall join
when Malcolm kills Rich-ed.
362
00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:24,200
Here.
363
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:29,560
No! Get the actor
who, in the play, is Malcolm!
364
00:23:29,560 --> 00:23:30,720
I'm so sorry.
365
00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:31,880
Malcolm!
366
00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:33,840
MUFFLED SPEECH
367
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,320
Now is the time to seize this power.
368
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:43,520
Richard and Louis
must die this very hour.
369
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:47,560
MUFFLED: You speak the truth,
m'lady. To the dungeon!
370
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:49,160
LOUD BANG, CRACKLING
371
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:50,720
MUFFLED SCREAMING
372
00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:03,920
Oh, no!
ELECTRICAL HUMMING
373
00:24:21,760 --> 00:24:23,400
To the dungeons!
374
00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:30,840
SCREAMING
375
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,400
I will stretch thee
until thou canst no more.
376
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,120
Demon of hell, do thy worst.
377
00:24:36,120 --> 00:24:38,400
SCREAMING
378
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:47,680
Ooh!
379
00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:50,600
Ooh! Ooooh!
380
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:53,440
Oo-oooh! Wahey!
381
00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,880
Go, torturer,
leave this knave to me.
382
00:24:59,880 --> 00:25:02,280
I shall to hell
dispatch him presently.
383
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:04,920
My liege!
384
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:04,920
HISSES
385
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:10,120
Will thou unbind my hands
so that I may pray?
386
00:25:10,120 --> 00:25:12,720
Be quick.
387
00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:14,520
Then I shall send thee on thy way.
388
00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:20,920
With one swift strike,
I set both of us free.
389
00:25:20,920 --> 00:25:25,800
Thus with your death,
my secret dies with thee.
390
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:27,280
CREAKING AND CLANKING
391
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:30,320
MUFFLED: Not so fast!
392
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:33,240
Well, Malcolm here
has caught me unaware.
393
00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:34,520
ELECTRICAL HUM
394
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:41,240
MUFFLED: No mercy,
now your treachery is revealed.
395
00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:42,640
Then let us fight.
396
00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:44,960
And death to him who yields.
397
00:25:48,120 --> 00:25:50,920
ELECTRICAL HUM
398
00:25:48,120 --> 00:25:50,920
Oh, no!
399
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:54,520
MUFFLED SHOUTS
400
00:25:57,360 --> 00:26:01,200
Prince Richard,
struck by Malcolm's noble blade.
401
00:26:06,120 --> 00:26:07,800
Argh!
402
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:10,920
Thus with this wound
my plans are all unmade.
403
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:14,880
Guard! Take him away!
404
00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:16,920
Oh...
405
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:19,400
Throw him in the darkest cell.
406
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:25,720
Thank you, sweet Malcolm.
The day is saved and all is well!
407
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:36,360
One twin is defeated.
Now strike the other down.
408
00:26:36,360 --> 00:26:39,960
With them both gone,
we two shall share the crown.
409
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:44,040
MUFFLED: Prepare to die!
410
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:48,840
Another traitor
in this nest of snakes.
411
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:51,880
Let our blades decide our fates.
412
00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:54,080
MUFFLED SPEECH
413
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:58,280
Thy sharp tongue
cannot harm me now.
414
00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:01,400
Hya! Hya! Hya!
415
00:27:01,400 --> 00:27:06,560
My blade doth pierce your back...
and you fall.
416
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:12,280
TRIUMPHANT FANFARE
417
00:27:18,360 --> 00:27:20,720
FANFARE CONTINUES
418
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:25,880
Malcolm is dead.
Richard is in chains.
419
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:28,040
The crown does pass
onto Louis' head.
420
00:27:34,120 --> 00:27:37,720
Er...Louis is...dead.
421
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:41,440
So the crown shall now pass onto...
422
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:43,640
..Queen Isobel.
423
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,040
Argh!
424
00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:56,600
No.
425
00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:58,080
No...
426
00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:02,760
The crown shall
now pass onto...
427
00:28:02,760 --> 00:28:04,480
BELLS JINGLE
428
00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:05,800
No.
429
00:28:09,040 --> 00:28:10,280
Oh, dear.
430
00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:12,040
Er...
431
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:14,880
It seems all our
characters are spent.
432
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:20,000
And, at last,
the trumpeter...is relevant!
433
00:28:30,480 --> 00:28:32,080
Execute Chris!
434
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:35,800
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING46814
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