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1
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- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
2
00:00:01,656 --> 00:00:04,223
Wow, we really pulled
this place together.
3
00:00:04,267 --> 00:00:05,921
Do you think Kenny and Liz will like it?
4
00:00:05,964 --> 00:00:08,837
I hope so. And I hope Liz Grams
the hell out of this wedding
5
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:10,621
for her 300,000 followers.
6
00:00:10,665 --> 00:00:12,536
Oh, I know I've made
fun of her social media,
7
00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:14,973
but now that it could help us
launch our bed-and-breakfast,
8
00:00:15,017 --> 00:00:17,541
we are the ones who are #Blessed.
9
00:00:17,585 --> 00:00:18,847
Oh, this is lovely!
10
00:00:18,890 --> 00:00:21,110
I hope these nuptials
go better than mine.
11
00:00:21,153 --> 00:00:22,677
Elias arrived late, drunk,
12
00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:23,982
and smelling of the maid's perfume.
13
00:00:24,026 --> 00:00:25,767
Hetty, why would you marry that guy?
14
00:00:25,810 --> 00:00:27,464
My father needed to close a land deal,
15
00:00:27,507 --> 00:00:29,074
and I was deemed his
most comely daughter.
16
00:00:29,118 --> 00:00:31,686
Damn Margaret and her
mustache. She dodged a bullet.
17
00:00:32,643 --> 00:00:33,992
Hey, you got a minute?
18
00:00:34,036 --> 00:00:35,646
Something I need you to see.
19
00:00:35,690 --> 00:00:37,082
Those are always
expensive words to hear.
20
00:00:37,126 --> 00:00:38,780
Oh, Mark, is it bad news?
21
00:00:38,823 --> 00:00:40,433
This could actually be good news.
22
00:00:40,477 --> 00:00:42,566
Well, I'll bring a check
for five grand just in case.
23
00:00:42,610 --> 00:00:44,394
No need. I have your card on file now.
24
00:00:44,437 --> 00:00:45,830
Great.
25
00:00:45,874 --> 00:00:47,745
So, I was doing some rewiring,
26
00:00:47,789 --> 00:00:49,965
and when I turned this sconce,
I heard a click from that wall.
27
00:00:50,008 --> 00:00:51,140
Check this out.
28
00:00:55,535 --> 00:00:57,973
And that's when I discovered
something behind this paneling.
29
00:00:58,016 --> 00:00:59,409
Is it a secret passageway?
30
00:00:59,452 --> 00:01:01,063
Don't toy with my emotions, Mark.
31
00:01:01,106 --> 00:01:03,587
It's never a secret passageway.
32
00:01:03,631 --> 00:01:05,502
But in this case, it is.
33
00:01:05,545 --> 00:01:08,200
- How about that mislead, babe?
- Mark's having fun.
34
00:01:08,244 --> 00:01:09,898
Oh! Oh!
35
00:01:11,639 --> 00:01:13,945
- Did you know about this, Hetty?
- I did not!
36
00:01:13,989 --> 00:01:15,860
What is down the passageway?
37
00:01:15,904 --> 00:01:17,514
Oh, it's good.
38
00:01:20,996 --> 00:01:22,562
I don't understand.
39
00:01:22,606 --> 00:01:25,000
So, we just have a bank
vault under our house?
40
00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:27,219
Well, you said a robber
baron lived here, right?
41
00:01:27,263 --> 00:01:30,266
What? Babe, we might be rich.
42
00:01:30,309 --> 00:01:32,485
Unless, of course, this
is a Geraldo situation.
43
00:01:32,529 --> 00:01:34,487
What is Geraldo?
44
00:01:34,531 --> 00:01:37,577
He was this news anchor
who did this live TV special
45
00:01:37,621 --> 00:01:39,405
where he opened up Al Capone's vault.
46
00:01:39,449 --> 00:01:41,625
And inside? Bubkes.
47
00:01:41,669 --> 00:01:43,714
Don't get me started on Al Capone.
48
00:01:43,758 --> 00:01:46,499
- That man was clingy.
- Can you open it?
49
00:01:46,543 --> 00:01:47,979
Think so.
50
00:01:48,023 --> 00:01:49,459
Course, it'll take a while.
51
00:01:49,502 --> 00:01:51,069
- Won't be cheap.
- Mark.
52
00:01:51,113 --> 00:01:52,680
Say the word. Card's on file.
53
00:01:53,811 --> 00:01:56,814
My crooked husband must have
built this to embezzle my riches.
54
00:01:56,858 --> 00:01:58,860
Hetty thinks there
might be riches inside.
55
00:01:58,903 --> 00:02:01,166
If this thing is filled with gold coins,
56
00:02:01,210 --> 00:02:03,168
I am definitely gonna
Scrooge McDuck in 'em.
57
00:02:03,212 --> 00:02:05,475
Can one of you walk through the
door and see what's in there?
58
00:02:05,518 --> 00:02:08,173
I'll do it. A Pinecone Trooper's
always up for an adventure.
59
00:02:09,479 --> 00:02:11,350
Oh! Peter!
60
00:02:11,394 --> 00:02:13,962
I've never seen that happen before.
61
00:02:14,005 --> 00:02:15,528
Pete bounced off the vault door.
62
00:02:15,572 --> 00:02:18,749
A surface that's impenetrable to ghosts?
63
00:02:18,793 --> 00:02:21,273
I love it when the
mythology gets expanded.
64
00:02:21,317 --> 00:02:24,624
Puny Pete must not be strong enough.
65
00:02:24,668 --> 00:02:26,844
Stand back.
66
00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:33,895
Well, this is mysterious.
67
00:02:40,292 --> 00:02:41,424
Hetty, do you have any idea
68
00:02:41,467 --> 00:02:43,252
what combination Elias could have used?
69
00:02:43,295 --> 00:02:45,080
Oh, that's a good idea.
70
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:46,646
Try 0603.
71
00:02:46,690 --> 00:02:48,344
Try 0603.
72
00:02:48,387 --> 00:02:50,738
- It was our anniversary.
- 0603.
73
00:02:50,781 --> 00:02:53,305
- Oh, nope.
- Okay.
74
00:02:53,349 --> 00:02:55,220
Fine. Uh, try 1101.
75
00:02:55,264 --> 00:02:56,526
1101?
76
00:02:56,569 --> 00:02:58,484
The maid's birthday.
77
00:02:58,528 --> 00:03:01,096
01.
78
00:03:02,314 --> 00:03:03,314
- Yes!
- Oh!
79
00:03:03,315 --> 00:03:05,274
Ah, that is heavy!
80
00:03:08,581 --> 00:03:09,757
Okay.
81
00:03:11,019 --> 00:03:12,237
Damn it!
82
00:03:12,281 --> 00:03:13,804
There's nothing in here.
83
00:03:13,848 --> 00:03:15,763
Aw. No riches.
84
00:03:15,806 --> 00:03:17,329
See, now picture this
85
00:03:17,373 --> 00:03:19,070
but with Geraldo having
to vamp for two hours.
86
00:03:20,724 --> 00:03:23,596
Sweet Lord, I'm finally free.
87
00:03:23,640 --> 00:03:26,382
Who are all you people? Hetty!
88
00:03:26,425 --> 00:03:29,298
Elias. How are you not rotting in hell?
89
00:03:29,341 --> 00:03:31,300
Good to see you, too.
90
00:03:31,343 --> 00:03:33,737
The ghost of a robber baron
just popped out of our safe.
91
00:03:33,781 --> 00:03:35,434
Hey, where's all your gold, man?
92
00:03:35,478 --> 00:03:37,567
Hi! I'm Pete. Nice to meet you.
93
00:03:37,610 --> 00:03:38,829
Welcome.
94
00:03:38,873 --> 00:03:41,049
Back, I guess. Welcome back.
95
00:03:41,092 --> 00:03:42,267
Oh, my God.
96
00:03:42,311 --> 00:03:44,748
- Is that... ?!
- My corpse?
97
00:03:44,792 --> 00:03:46,706
It is. The only thing
that kept me company
98
00:03:46,750 --> 00:03:49,535
when I was locked in there
for the last 130 years.
99
00:03:49,579 --> 00:03:50,928
Not much of a talker, though.
100
00:03:52,451 --> 00:03:54,932
That must be Kenny and Liz. I'll get it.
101
00:03:54,976 --> 00:03:56,412
Okay. I'll just stay in here
102
00:03:56,455 --> 00:03:58,109
with the corpse and all the ghosts.
103
00:03:58,153 --> 00:03:59,763
I was kidding. Sam, please slow down!
104
00:03:59,807 --> 00:04:01,112
Sam!
105
00:04:01,156 --> 00:04:03,854
So, this is where you've
been all this time?
106
00:04:03,898 --> 00:04:07,553
Yes. What did you think
when I just disappeared?
107
00:04:07,597 --> 00:04:08,990
Didn't you search for me?
108
00:04:09,033 --> 00:04:10,861
You didn't tell anyone about the vault.
109
00:04:10,905 --> 00:04:12,863
I assumed that you ran off
with one of your many floozies.
110
00:04:12,907 --> 00:04:15,257
No. The vault maker locked me in here.
111
00:04:15,300 --> 00:04:17,607
- He left me to suffocate.
- Oh.
112
00:04:17,650 --> 00:04:19,130
His wife and I had grown close.
113
00:04:19,174 --> 00:04:20,958
Oh, God.
- And when he finished the vault,
114
00:04:21,002 --> 00:04:22,525
there was a debate over payment
115
00:04:22,568 --> 00:04:23,700
- and the paternity of his son, but...
- Oh.
116
00:04:23,743 --> 00:04:26,311
Wait, all of you are ghosts?
117
00:04:26,355 --> 00:04:28,792
Yeah, bro. We've all died on
the property over the years.
118
00:04:28,836 --> 00:04:30,446
Most people go up,
119
00:04:30,489 --> 00:04:32,274
- but we just stick around for some reason.
- Hi.
120
00:04:32,317 --> 00:04:34,276
I am Thorfinn.
121
00:04:34,319 --> 00:04:35,886
I like herring and...
122
00:04:35,930 --> 00:04:39,585
Wonderful. Now, how do-eth you, madam?
123
00:04:39,629 --> 00:04:41,109
Really?
124
00:04:41,152 --> 00:04:44,155
Mm-mm. Not happening.
125
00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:48,638
- Hi! Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi!
- Hi!
126
00:04:48,681 --> 00:04:52,685
Oh, I am so excited to be here.
127
00:04:52,729 --> 00:04:55,950
I can't believe we're
getting married tomorrow.
128
00:04:58,039 --> 00:05:00,432
Kenny, did you get that?
129
00:05:00,476 --> 00:05:02,260
Oh! Sorry, the phone wasn't ready.
130
00:05:02,304 --> 00:05:03,914
Uh... Okay, this is
gonna be a big weekend
131
00:05:03,958 --> 00:05:05,785
for us, so I'm gonna need
you to have your phone
132
00:05:05,829 --> 00:05:07,222
- in your hand at all times, okay?
- Yeah.
133
00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:08,832
These two seem like a lot.
134
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,268
Oh, so, who's this little guy?
135
00:05:10,312 --> 00:05:11,617
Oh, this is Rooney,
136
00:05:11,661 --> 00:05:13,576
our rescue that we rescued.
137
00:05:13,619 --> 00:05:15,186
Oh, my God, Rooney. I follow him.
138
00:05:15,230 --> 00:05:18,450
Uh, Rooney's got,
like, 30,000 followers.
139
00:05:18,494 --> 00:05:19,756
What's a follower?
140
00:05:19,799 --> 00:05:21,453
Well, in the cult, it referred to anyone
141
00:05:21,497 --> 00:05:23,586
who'd gotten the tattoo
and slept with Bruce.
142
00:05:23,629 --> 00:05:25,762
Are you guys gonna post any
pictures while you're here?
143
00:05:25,805 --> 00:05:28,896
Feel free to tag us. #WoodstoneB&B.
144
00:05:28,939 --> 00:05:31,028
I absolutely will,
145
00:05:31,072 --> 00:05:32,725
just after the wedding.
146
00:05:32,769 --> 00:05:35,250
Actually on a short social
media vacay right now.
147
00:05:35,293 --> 00:05:37,339
It's part of a brand strategy
148
00:05:37,382 --> 00:05:38,862
to make sure that Liz
149
00:05:38,906 --> 00:05:40,211
seems more present
for life's big moments.
150
00:05:40,255 --> 00:05:41,560
Exactly.
151
00:05:41,604 --> 00:05:43,867
Because life is about what happens
152
00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:46,087
when the cameras aren't rolling.
153
00:05:47,349 --> 00:05:49,568
- Kenny, did you get that?
- Oh, sorry.
154
00:05:49,612 --> 00:05:52,484
- Damn it. Okay, we'll roll it back.
- Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
155
00:05:53,529 --> 00:05:56,662
I still can't believe I
didn't ascend into heaven.
156
00:05:56,706 --> 00:05:59,143
I paid the church. There was a contract!
157
00:05:59,187 --> 00:06:02,146
Did you pay for me, too,
or was it just a solo trip?
158
00:06:02,190 --> 00:06:03,495
I was a little pinched at the time.
159
00:06:03,539 --> 00:06:05,106
The mill workers had unionized,
160
00:06:05,149 --> 00:06:06,585
which I put down violently,
161
00:06:06,629 --> 00:06:08,413
but somebody had to pay for that mob.
162
00:06:08,457 --> 00:06:09,980
That is not a great story.
163
00:06:10,024 --> 00:06:11,982
So, you're an actual robber baron.
164
00:06:12,026 --> 00:06:13,941
I mean, you're, like,
really rich, right?
165
00:06:13,984 --> 00:06:17,596
Let me put it to you this way:
I ate meat several times a week.
166
00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:19,947
Well, it's not a Lamborghini,
but that's very cool.
167
00:06:19,990 --> 00:06:22,471
So, did anyone else from our
day stick around as a ghost?
168
00:06:22,514 --> 00:06:23,907
He's gonna ask about the maid.
169
00:06:23,951 --> 00:06:26,779
Like, oh, I don't know, say, the maid?
170
00:06:26,823 --> 00:06:28,390
Just to name someone randomly.
171
00:06:28,433 --> 00:06:29,869
No, she's no longer here,
172
00:06:29,913 --> 00:06:31,262
you syphilitic reprobate.
173
00:06:31,306 --> 00:06:34,265
First off, everybody fun had syphilis.
174
00:06:34,309 --> 00:06:36,224
And I don't appreciate that tone.
175
00:06:36,267 --> 00:06:37,877
Well, then maybe you should go back
176
00:06:37,921 --> 00:06:39,705
down to your vault and talk
to your withered corpse.
177
00:06:39,749 --> 00:06:41,011
There it is again.
178
00:06:41,055 --> 00:06:42,795
What happened to my obedient wife?
179
00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:45,885
Well, modern women don't
just defer to their husbands,
180
00:06:45,929 --> 00:06:47,975
Elias, and I have learned from
the living lady of the house
181
00:06:48,018 --> 00:06:49,715
that when she doesn't like
something, she says so.
182
00:06:49,759 --> 00:06:52,675
Like when Jay spent $500 on action doll.
183
00:06:52,718 --> 00:06:54,242
Big mistake.
184
00:06:54,285 --> 00:06:57,288
That living lady is a
dangerous influence on you
185
00:06:57,332 --> 00:06:59,290
with her newfangled notions.
186
00:06:59,334 --> 00:07:01,945
She and Jay have simply opened my eyes.
187
00:07:01,989 --> 00:07:03,381
They have a respectful marriage,
188
00:07:03,425 --> 00:07:04,948
and you were a terrible husband, Elias.
189
00:07:04,992 --> 00:07:06,428
And my least favorite cousin.
190
00:07:07,342 --> 00:07:10,345
I don't have to stand here and
listen to another word of this!
191
00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:13,739
Look, it's not important,
but how hot was this maid?
192
00:07:19,745 --> 00:07:22,574
What kind of servant
doesn't move out of the way?
193
00:07:27,449 --> 00:07:30,408
You want to go into that
room and have sex right now?
194
00:07:30,452 --> 00:07:31,888
I... What?
195
00:07:31,931 --> 00:07:34,934
- I want you like I've never wanted anyone.
- Uh,
196
00:07:34,978 --> 00:07:38,677
sorry, I'm married. But that was
a much-needed confidence boost.
197
00:07:39,635 --> 00:07:41,332
What are you talking about?
198
00:07:41,376 --> 00:07:43,595
About you hitting on me just now?
199
00:07:43,639 --> 00:07:45,380
You wish.
200
00:07:48,992 --> 00:07:50,254
Wow.
201
00:07:50,298 --> 00:07:52,474
And this is where it all happens.
202
00:07:52,517 --> 00:07:55,390
Wow. The wedding planner was raving
203
00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,392
about the heritage menu you're doing.
204
00:07:57,435 --> 00:07:59,698
Now, I've never had squab.
205
00:07:59,742 --> 00:08:01,570
What's that like?
206
00:08:01,613 --> 00:08:04,442
I'd say it's like pigeon.
It's a lot like pigeon.
207
00:08:04,486 --> 00:08:06,314
Well, I'm really
looking forward to seeing
208
00:08:06,357 --> 00:08:08,142
what you come up with.
209
00:08:08,185 --> 00:08:10,840
Oh! Blast it, that hurt.
210
00:08:10,883 --> 00:08:12,755
Uh...
211
00:08:12,798 --> 00:08:14,409
are you okay?
212
00:08:14,452 --> 00:08:16,150
Yeah.
213
00:08:16,193 --> 00:08:19,805
I feel real good.
214
00:08:19,849 --> 00:08:21,111
Oh, great.
215
00:08:21,155 --> 00:08:23,158
Well, I-I'll just show you the sauces.
216
00:08:23,159 --> 00:08:25,959
All I can think about
is grabbing your butt.
217
00:08:28,212 --> 00:08:30,930
- What? What is it? What's going on, Jay?
- Okay.
218
00:08:30,974 --> 00:08:32,280
I don't know how to tell you this.
219
00:08:33,281 --> 00:08:35,065
Liz hit on me.
220
00:08:35,108 --> 00:08:37,633
- What? The bride?
- Oh, okay.
221
00:08:37,676 --> 00:08:39,330
Wait, what does that mean?
222
00:08:39,374 --> 00:08:42,028
- You don't believe me?
- No, it's just, are you sure
223
00:08:42,072 --> 00:08:44,030
this isn't, like, an
Olive Garden situation?
224
00:08:44,074 --> 00:08:46,032
Okay, that waitress
definitely hit on me.
225
00:08:46,076 --> 00:08:48,121
- What is the Olive Garden?
- It's a restaurant
226
00:08:48,165 --> 00:08:49,688
known for its endless
breadstick baskets.
227
00:08:49,732 --> 00:08:52,387
- Alberta and Sass are here.
- Oh, hey.
228
00:08:52,430 --> 00:08:55,259
Endless? How is that even possible?
229
00:08:55,303 --> 00:08:57,000
Jay and I ate there a couple months ago,
230
00:08:57,043 --> 00:08:59,089
and our waitress was
refilling our bread basket...
231
00:08:59,132 --> 00:09:01,047
Yeah, and then I said,
"No, thank you, or I'll eat
232
00:09:01,091 --> 00:09:04,660
'olive' them." Olive. Olive Garden.
233
00:09:04,703 --> 00:09:06,270
Tonya laughed for six straight minutes.
234
00:09:06,314 --> 00:09:07,706
Yeah, she works for tips, Jay.
235
00:09:07,750 --> 00:09:09,708
Hey, this is a victory for you.
236
00:09:09,752 --> 00:09:12,668
You have me. You're
living Tonya's dream.
237
00:09:12,711 --> 00:09:14,539
Okay, so, what exactly did Liz say?
238
00:09:14,583 --> 00:09:17,803
She said all she could think
about was grabbing my butt.
239
00:09:17,847 --> 00:09:19,588
Mm. That little thing?
240
00:09:19,631 --> 00:09:22,286
Wait, seriously? She did hit on you.
241
00:09:22,330 --> 00:09:24,258
- That's insane.
- Do we tell Kenny?
242
00:09:24,259 --> 00:09:25,259
Because if we tell Kenny,
243
00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:27,422
then this wedding probably
gets called off, right?
244
00:09:27,465 --> 00:09:28,771
Liz was gonna post about it.
245
00:09:28,814 --> 00:09:30,207
This was gonna put us on the map.
246
00:09:30,250 --> 00:09:31,774
But we got to tell him, right?
247
00:09:31,817 --> 00:09:33,384
Yes.
248
00:09:33,428 --> 00:09:36,387
Ugh, why do you have to
be so damn irresistible?
249
00:09:36,431 --> 00:09:38,781
Sorry. It's a curse.
250
00:09:38,824 --> 00:09:41,261
Hey, guys.
251
00:09:41,305 --> 00:09:43,742
What's wrong, Samantha?
252
00:09:43,786 --> 00:09:45,701
It has been a day.
253
00:09:45,744 --> 00:09:47,877
Tell me about it.
254
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:49,922
I cannot believe Elias is back.
255
00:09:49,966 --> 00:09:53,056
Till death do us part.
It's right in the vows.
256
00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:55,754
So, why'd you have a bad day, Samantha?
257
00:09:55,798 --> 00:09:57,539
Well, the bride hit on Jay,
258
00:09:57,582 --> 00:09:59,541
and now Kenny's probably
gonna call the whole thing off.
259
00:09:59,584 --> 00:10:01,020
- What?
- Wait, seriously?
260
00:10:01,064 --> 00:10:02,587
Now she's not gonna post
pictures of the mansion,
261
00:10:02,631 --> 00:10:04,328
and we're not even gonna
get paid for the wedding.
262
00:10:04,372 --> 00:10:06,678
We're, like, this close
to defaulting on our loan.
263
00:10:06,722 --> 00:10:09,072
Samantha, what are you saying?
264
00:10:09,115 --> 00:10:11,117
Okay, I hadn't told you guys,
265
00:10:11,161 --> 00:10:13,076
but if we don't start making money soon,
266
00:10:13,119 --> 00:10:14,773
we could lose the house.
267
00:10:14,817 --> 00:10:18,037
No, you cannot leave us!
268
00:10:18,081 --> 00:10:19,865
Just when I finally learned to
look beyond the hideous pants
269
00:10:19,909 --> 00:10:22,433
and see the wonderful person
inside the hideous pants.
270
00:10:22,477 --> 00:10:24,609
You think I want to leave?
I don't know what to do.
271
00:10:24,653 --> 00:10:26,394
I have it. Solution.
272
00:10:26,437 --> 00:10:28,526
You and small man kill yourselves.
273
00:10:28,570 --> 00:10:31,007
Become ghosts. And then
we are friends forever.
274
00:10:31,050 --> 00:10:32,748
But they might not
actually become ghosts.
275
00:10:32,791 --> 00:10:35,490
Right, that's the
problem with that plan.
276
00:10:35,533 --> 00:10:38,960
Hello, all. Get your
spatter dashes off my table.
277
00:10:38,961 --> 00:10:40,773
I had it upholstered with the hide
278
00:10:40,774 --> 00:10:43,323
of a white rhinoceros I shot in Kenya.
279
00:10:43,367 --> 00:10:45,238
Oh, my God. Those are extinct now.
280
00:10:45,282 --> 00:10:47,327
Really? We got 'em all? Bully for us.
281
00:10:47,371 --> 00:10:48,633
Man, he is evil.
282
00:10:48,677 --> 00:10:50,374
And I used to pillage for a living.
283
00:10:50,418 --> 00:10:53,738
Oh! That thing ran through my leg.
284
00:10:53,739 --> 00:10:56,336
Skin that beast and
turn it into a table.
285
00:10:56,380 --> 00:10:58,208
Must everything be a table?
286
00:10:58,251 --> 00:11:02,386
Well, he's really interested
in that teddy bear.
287
00:11:02,430 --> 00:11:04,649
Ah! Look at the little guy go.
288
00:11:04,693 --> 00:11:07,435
Good boy. Yes, use your hips.
289
00:11:07,478 --> 00:11:09,872
One walk through you and the
dog becomes a sex pervert.
290
00:11:09,915 --> 00:11:11,482
Can't say I'm surprised.
291
00:11:11,526 --> 00:11:14,833
Wait, Elias, did you walk
through any Livings today?
292
00:11:14,877 --> 00:11:16,748
Like the bride, to be specific?
293
00:11:16,792 --> 00:11:19,795
Yes, in fact, I did accidentally
happen through her. Why?
294
00:11:19,838 --> 00:11:22,058
That's it. That's why Liz hit on Jay.
295
00:11:22,101 --> 00:11:24,582
Your ghost power is that when people...
296
00:11:24,626 --> 00:11:25,931
or animals, apparently...
297
00:11:25,975 --> 00:11:27,759
walk through you, they get horny.
298
00:11:27,803 --> 00:11:29,152
Really?
299
00:11:29,195 --> 00:11:30,545
Okay, I know he's controversial,
300
00:11:30,588 --> 00:11:32,547
- but that's pretty cool.
- Yeah.
301
00:11:32,590 --> 00:11:34,070
It wasn't Liz's fault at all.
302
00:11:34,113 --> 00:11:35,637
She didn't mean to hit on Jay.
303
00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:37,595
I've got to stop Jay telling Kenny.
304
00:11:38,339 --> 00:11:40,946
Well, I hope you're happy.
305
00:11:40,990 --> 00:11:42,948
You nearly ruined this wedding.
306
00:11:42,992 --> 00:11:44,602
Those two are hemorrhaging cash.
307
00:11:44,646 --> 00:11:46,125
They need this to be a success.
308
00:11:46,169 --> 00:11:47,953
You're saying those
Livings need this wedding
309
00:11:47,997 --> 00:11:49,564
to go off without a hitch,
310
00:11:49,607 --> 00:11:50,869
otherwise they'll be leaving?
311
00:11:50,913 --> 00:11:52,392
Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying.
312
00:11:52,436 --> 00:11:54,133
Hmm.
313
00:11:54,177 --> 00:11:56,701
Why is he literally
twirling his mustache?
314
00:11:56,745 --> 00:11:58,529
It can't be good.
315
00:12:00,575 --> 00:12:02,228
Kenny, hey.
316
00:12:02,272 --> 00:12:04,492
- I've been looking all over for you.
- What's up, buddy?
317
00:12:04,535 --> 00:12:06,450
I don't know how to say this. Um...
318
00:12:06,494 --> 00:12:09,627
Okay, y-you know how I'm always
getting hit on by random women?
319
00:12:09,671 --> 00:12:11,760
Is this about the
Cheesecake Factory waitress?
320
00:12:11,803 --> 00:12:14,414
There's an entire factory
dedicated to cheesecake?
321
00:12:14,458 --> 00:12:16,982
- It's as amazing as it sounds.
- Wow.
322
00:12:17,026 --> 00:12:19,419
- No, it's not about her.
- You know, she probably writes
323
00:12:19,463 --> 00:12:20,856
"thank you" with the
little heart-shaped Os
324
00:12:20,899 --> 00:12:22,814
on every receipt. She works for tips.
325
00:12:22,858 --> 00:12:25,817
Uh, Jay, can I just,
uh, grab you for a sec?
326
00:12:25,861 --> 00:12:27,863
Actually, Kenny and I
were just about to have
327
00:12:27,906 --> 00:12:30,692
- a difficult conversation.
- We were?
328
00:12:30,735 --> 00:12:33,390
Well, no difficult
conversations are needed,
329
00:12:33,433 --> 00:12:35,131
because everything is actually okay.
330
00:12:35,174 --> 00:12:37,394
Oh, hey, it's the Monopoly guy.
331
00:12:37,437 --> 00:12:38,917
What are you talking about, Sam?
332
00:12:38,961 --> 00:12:40,179
I'm talking about the fact that...
333
00:12:40,223 --> 00:12:42,225
Criminy.
334
00:12:43,726 --> 00:12:46,229
Oh, what are you doing, man?
335
00:12:46,272 --> 00:12:47,273
Just spreading a little love.
336
00:12:47,317 --> 00:12:49,101
Aw, that's sweet.
337
00:12:49,145 --> 00:12:51,582
You two are looking good.
338
00:12:51,626 --> 00:12:54,106
Very good.
339
00:12:54,150 --> 00:12:56,892
Jay? What's going on?
340
00:12:56,935 --> 00:12:58,589
I haven't seen Sam this worked up
341
00:12:58,633 --> 00:13:00,722
since she saw that
movie The Holiday on TV.
342
00:13:00,765 --> 00:13:03,855
- Sam?
- Damnation!
343
00:13:03,899 --> 00:13:05,640
You can't just walk through people.
344
00:13:05,683 --> 00:13:08,120
- It's the greatest pain there is.
- Well, actually...
345
00:13:08,164 --> 00:13:09,164
- Yes, yes, we know.
- Okay.
346
00:13:09,165 --> 00:13:11,210
Well, hello, you two.
347
00:13:11,715 --> 00:13:14,474
Did you leave the oven on?
Or is it just getting...
348
00:13:14,518 --> 00:13:16,128
hot in here?
349
00:13:16,172 --> 00:13:18,566
Well, enjoy the show.
350
00:13:18,609 --> 00:13:20,089
Hey, Kenny,
351
00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:22,091
didn't you say you didn't
have a bachelor party?
352
00:13:22,134 --> 00:13:25,616
Well, how about we have
a little party right here?
353
00:13:25,660 --> 00:13:27,487
- What?
- I could be Cameron Diaz,
354
00:13:27,531 --> 00:13:30,675
and you two could be
a couple of Jude Laws.
355
00:13:30,700 --> 00:13:32,005
Okay, that was not in the movie.
356
00:13:32,049 --> 00:13:33,355
What is that?
357
00:13:33,398 --> 00:13:34,965
Did you just meow at me?
358
00:13:35,008 --> 00:13:37,707
What are you doing? What's going on?
359
00:13:37,750 --> 00:13:38,969
I don't think I'm tall
enough to be Jude Law.
360
00:13:39,012 --> 00:13:40,623
Liz. Liz. Liz!
361
00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:42,997
Oh.
362
00:13:43,895 --> 00:13:45,956
What happened? I feel
like I just blacked out.
363
00:13:45,981 --> 00:13:47,809
Me, too. I-I have the strangest urge
364
00:13:47,853 --> 00:13:49,158
to watch a Nancy Meyers movie.
365
00:13:49,202 --> 00:13:51,160
Kenny? What's happening?
366
00:13:51,204 --> 00:13:55,513
These two just propositioned
me for a threesome.
367
00:13:55,556 --> 00:13:56,905
They what?
368
00:13:56,949 --> 00:13:58,167
We what?
369
00:13:58,211 --> 00:13:59,734
It was Elias.
370
00:13:59,778 --> 00:14:01,475
Oh, God.
371
00:14:01,519 --> 00:14:03,434
Uh, there's got to be some
kind of misunderstanding.
372
00:14:03,477 --> 00:14:07,394
No. No. Uh, we did
proposition Kenny, actually.
373
00:14:07,438 --> 00:14:09,527
- What?
- Babe.
374
00:14:09,570 --> 00:14:11,311
As a test of your faithfulness.
375
00:14:11,354 --> 00:14:13,487
And guess what. You passed.
376
00:14:13,531 --> 00:14:16,838
- Yep, you passed. Flying colors.
- I'm sorry,
377
00:14:16,882 --> 00:14:19,841
you two tried to have sex with my Kenny
378
00:14:19,885 --> 00:14:21,582
the day before my wedding?
379
00:14:21,626 --> 00:14:23,236
No. No, God, no.
380
00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:25,281
Oh, my God, no, I would
not have sex with Kenny.
381
00:14:25,325 --> 00:14:29,111
But you guys should definitely
have sex with each other.
382
00:14:29,155 --> 00:14:31,505
Okay, this is too weird.
383
00:14:31,549 --> 00:14:35,204
Uh, disgusting. We will not
be having our wedding here.
384
00:14:35,248 --> 00:14:37,946
No, no, no, don't leave.
What about the squab?
385
00:14:37,990 --> 00:14:39,034
The squab!
386
00:14:41,128 --> 00:14:43,941
You know, a bake sale's a
quick way to earn some cash.
387
00:14:43,966 --> 00:14:46,708
O... our troop once
raised $78 in one week.
388
00:14:46,752 --> 00:14:49,102
- Thanks, Pete.
- What's happening?
389
00:14:49,145 --> 00:14:51,357
The ghosts are pitching
ways for us to make money.
390
00:14:51,358 --> 00:14:52,358
That's sweet.
391
00:14:52,410 --> 00:14:54,586
- Any viable ideas?
- I have a plan.
392
00:14:54,629 --> 00:14:56,414
But it only works if
you have a tommy gun.
393
00:14:56,457 --> 00:14:57,980
Not really.
394
00:14:58,024 --> 00:14:59,808
Here's what you do. You go to New York.
395
00:14:59,852 --> 00:15:01,680
You look up this guy I know.
He's gonna double your money.
396
00:15:01,723 --> 00:15:03,116
His name, Bernie Madoff.
397
00:15:03,159 --> 00:15:04,465
Miracle worker.
398
00:15:04,509 --> 00:15:07,313
I robbed a bank once, if that helps.
399
00:15:07,338 --> 00:15:09,634
Did I ever tell you guys about that?
400
00:15:09,659 --> 00:15:11,532
I don't think we're gonna
get out of this mess, Sam.
401
00:15:11,557 --> 00:15:13,142
We're up to our ears in debt.
402
00:15:13,167 --> 00:15:14,908
This house is our only asset.
403
00:15:14,952 --> 00:15:17,041
I think we're gonna have to sell.
404
00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:20,261
Aw, are the poors gonna have to leave?
405
00:15:20,305 --> 00:15:21,872
That didn't take long.
406
00:15:21,915 --> 00:15:24,048
I'd tell you exactly how long,
407
00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:26,267
but unfortunately this
thing doesn't work anymore.
408
00:15:26,311 --> 00:15:28,574
You'd think, for $5,000,
409
00:15:28,618 --> 00:15:30,184
it would last into the afterlife.
410
00:15:30,228 --> 00:15:33,666
You spent $5,000 on a watch?!
411
00:15:33,710 --> 00:15:35,450
Wait a minute.
412
00:15:35,494 --> 00:15:38,366
If Elias has that valuable
timepiece on his ghostly person,
413
00:15:38,410 --> 00:15:41,761
- that must mean...
- The real watch must be on his corpse.
414
00:15:41,805 --> 00:15:43,720
What about a corpse?
415
00:15:43,763 --> 00:15:46,810
Babe, I need you to do me a quick favor.
416
00:15:48,681 --> 00:15:51,118
Yeah, I don't think I can do this.
417
00:15:51,162 --> 00:15:52,380
It's looking right at me.
418
00:15:52,424 --> 00:15:53,643
Babe, he's not looking at you.
419
00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:55,645
His eyes are little, withered husks.
420
00:15:55,688 --> 00:15:57,951
That is not having the calming
effect that you want it to.
421
00:15:57,995 --> 00:16:00,084
Okay.
422
00:16:00,127 --> 00:16:01,564
Okay.
423
00:16:01,607 --> 00:16:03,087
Oh.
424
00:16:03,130 --> 00:16:04,610
I know what pocket he kept it in,
425
00:16:04,654 --> 00:16:07,308
but I confess, I'm enjoying this.
426
00:16:08,309 --> 00:16:09,484
Guys?
427
00:16:09,528 --> 00:16:11,530
- We got it.
- Yes!
428
00:16:11,574 --> 00:16:13,112
- All right!
- I bet that's worth
429
00:16:13,113 --> 00:16:14,620
a pretty penny in today's dollars.
430
00:16:14,664 --> 00:16:15,795
Definitely enough to keep the bank
431
00:16:15,839 --> 00:16:17,144
off our backs for a few months.
432
00:16:17,188 --> 00:16:19,146
- Take that, bank.
- Yes, I'm sure the bank
433
00:16:19,190 --> 00:16:21,443
will be very hurt that
you're making timely payments.
434
00:16:21,468 --> 00:16:23,905
- So, this means you're not selling the house?
- No, Sass,
435
00:16:23,949 --> 00:16:25,690
we're staying. We have a few more months
436
00:16:25,733 --> 00:16:26,995
to get the business up and running.
437
00:16:27,039 --> 00:16:30,085
Well, I am very happy about that.
438
00:16:30,129 --> 00:16:32,233
Oh, look, Elias, another opinion.
439
00:16:32,234 --> 00:16:33,915
And nothing you can do about it.
440
00:16:33,959 --> 00:16:37,005
You think this is over? That
I'm just going to give up?
441
00:16:37,049 --> 00:16:38,616
As long as I'm here,
442
00:16:38,659 --> 00:16:40,008
they will never host a wedding
443
00:16:40,052 --> 00:16:41,880
that I don't turn into an all-out orgy.
444
00:16:41,923 --> 00:16:43,751
So just normal wedding?
445
00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:45,623
And I won't stop there.
Whatever they host,
446
00:16:45,666 --> 00:16:47,320
I'll make it horny.
447
00:16:47,364 --> 00:16:49,322
Funeral? Horny.
448
00:16:49,366 --> 00:16:50,932
High tea? Horny.
449
00:16:50,976 --> 00:16:54,675
Baptism? Ravenous thrust-fest.
450
00:16:54,719 --> 00:16:56,329
Is this starting to sound
good to anybody else?
451
00:16:56,373 --> 00:16:57,765
Why are you doing this?
452
00:16:57,809 --> 00:16:59,767
Because I want you Livings out of here.
453
00:16:59,811 --> 00:17:01,813
You have corrupted my Hetty.
454
00:17:01,856 --> 00:17:04,685
No! I haven't been corrupted.
455
00:17:04,729 --> 00:17:06,731
I have changed. A little.
456
00:17:06,774 --> 00:17:09,951
For the better, I
think. Let's be honest.
457
00:17:09,995 --> 00:17:12,737
Elias, you and I were not good people.
458
00:17:12,780 --> 00:17:14,391
We stole. We exploited.
459
00:17:14,434 --> 00:17:16,654
We profited off of others' misery.
460
00:17:16,697 --> 00:17:18,133
We did have fun.
461
00:17:18,177 --> 00:17:19,831
But while you were
trapped in that vault,
462
00:17:19,874 --> 00:17:21,702
I have been out here.
463
00:17:21,746 --> 00:17:23,965
Learning from these people.
464
00:17:24,009 --> 00:17:27,099
Learning from Alberta to speak my mind
465
00:17:27,142 --> 00:17:28,622
and learning from Sam
466
00:17:28,666 --> 00:17:30,450
that the Irish are
people, too, apparently.
467
00:17:30,494 --> 00:17:32,713
- She says it, but I don't think she believes it.
- Yes,
468
00:17:32,757 --> 00:17:34,367
I complain about being here.
469
00:17:34,411 --> 00:17:36,761
And yes, I do want to be
sucked off more than anything.
470
00:17:36,804 --> 00:17:40,242
But these people have taught
me how to be a better Hetty.
471
00:17:40,286 --> 00:17:43,811
And I say there's hope for you, too,
472
00:17:43,855 --> 00:17:45,378
Elias.
473
00:17:45,422 --> 00:17:46,901
You're here for eternity.
474
00:17:46,945 --> 00:17:49,339
Why not use it to change?
475
00:17:49,382 --> 00:17:52,603
I don't need to be a better person.
476
00:17:52,646 --> 00:17:54,431
There is no good or evil.
477
00:17:54,474 --> 00:17:56,563
That's just a story we tell ourselves.
478
00:17:56,607 --> 00:17:57,999
And I know better.
479
00:17:58,043 --> 00:18:00,959
So, Hetty, get this through your tiny,
480
00:18:01,002 --> 00:18:04,179
inferior female brain.
481
00:18:04,223 --> 00:18:07,574
I will never change.
482
00:18:07,618 --> 00:18:11,230
Well, then, you can go to hell.
483
00:18:17,367 --> 00:18:18,542
Whoa!
484
00:18:18,585 --> 00:18:19,760
Oh, my God!
485
00:18:19,804 --> 00:18:21,283
He just went down on us.
486
00:18:21,327 --> 00:18:22,850
I didn't know that could happen.
487
00:18:22,894 --> 00:18:24,330
Yeah, I don't love having
to worry about that.
488
00:18:24,374 --> 00:18:26,680
Did I... Did I just... ?
489
00:18:26,724 --> 00:18:30,162
Is that my power, we think?
Banishing people to Hades?
490
00:18:30,205 --> 00:18:31,859
Or it was him just yelling
he was never gonna change
491
00:18:31,903 --> 00:18:33,600
and basically thumbing
his nose at the universe.
492
00:18:33,644 --> 00:18:34,949
That's another possibility.
493
00:18:34,993 --> 00:18:36,473
Well, we should try it out.
494
00:18:36,516 --> 00:18:37,648
Trevor, go to hell.
495
00:18:37,691 --> 00:18:39,780
Why?! Why?! Why?!
496
00:18:39,824 --> 00:18:42,174
Why?! Why would you pick
me?! What is wrong with you?!
497
00:18:42,217 --> 00:18:44,263
Guess not.
498
00:18:44,306 --> 00:18:47,397
- That was so scary.
- Oh, calm down.
499
00:18:50,778 --> 00:18:54,260
I mean, this is just a big
day in terms of ghost rules.
500
00:18:54,303 --> 00:18:55,739
So, the floor opens up,
501
00:18:55,783 --> 00:18:57,219
and this guy falls through
right in front of you?
502
00:18:57,263 --> 00:18:58,960
That's incredible.
503
00:18:59,004 --> 00:19:01,136
Well, Jay seems awfully
gleeful about this new horror
504
00:19:01,180 --> 00:19:02,485
we all have hanging over our heads.
505
00:19:02,529 --> 00:19:03,878
You got to tell me how
it happened. I mean,
506
00:19:03,922 --> 00:19:05,924
was it hot? Was there screaming?
507
00:19:05,967 --> 00:19:07,621
Was country music playing?
508
00:19:07,664 --> 00:19:09,188
Well, there was screaming,
509
00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:11,755
but I'm pretty sure that
was just from our ghosts.
510
00:19:11,799 --> 00:19:13,888
Thor not scream. Thor not scared
511
00:19:13,932 --> 00:19:16,456
of some silly hole in the ground.
512
00:19:16,499 --> 00:19:18,762
Because Thor working
towards being better person.
513
00:19:18,806 --> 00:19:20,895
Very open to change.
514
00:19:20,939 --> 00:19:23,593
It all happened so fast. It was,
like, this red light, suddenly,
515
00:19:23,637 --> 00:19:24,812
and then whoosh.
516
00:19:24,856 --> 00:19:26,422
Mm! He went down on us.
517
00:19:26,466 --> 00:19:28,120
Alberta, I'm not sure
that's the best term...
518
00:19:28,163 --> 00:19:29,861
What? If that's the term
that she wants to use,
519
00:19:29,904 --> 00:19:31,297
then she can do it.
520
00:19:31,340 --> 00:19:33,081
Hello, all.
521
00:19:33,125 --> 00:19:35,083
I'm feeling in a good mood,
522
00:19:35,127 --> 00:19:38,782
so you may all remain on
this earthly plane tonight.
523
00:19:38,826 --> 00:19:40,610
So funny.
524
00:19:40,654 --> 00:19:43,135
Hetty just came in, joking about
trying to send Trevor to hell.
525
00:19:43,178 --> 00:19:45,137
Aw, too soon, Hetty.
526
00:19:45,180 --> 00:19:48,923
Trevor, I told you, I knew
it wasn't going to work.
527
00:19:48,967 --> 00:19:50,925
I don't actually have that power.
528
00:19:50,969 --> 00:19:52,231
Or do I?
529
00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:54,059
Thorfinn, you're in my seat.
530
00:19:54,102 --> 00:19:56,278
Moving! Yes.
531
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:00,997
Wasn't comfortable there, anyways.
532
00:20:02,678 --> 00:20:07,678
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
39097
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