All language subtitles for Candida.2006.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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When I was 4 years old,
my father went off to war,

leaving no word of his return.

That's when
I started cleaning houses

and I haven't stopped since.

Hard work got me this apartment,

where I raised my family.
No easy task,

I assure you.

Especially when my mother
and husband were still alive.

They hated each other.

Always screaming!
These walls have seen more screams

than coats of paint.

Glory to the Father, the Son...

and the Holy Spirit.

The humidity is the worst part.

Believe you me,

I've seen my share
of cold winters.

I'd long for summer to arrive
because then I would only starve.

That's why, when I die,
I want to be buried in flames.

I want to go out nice and warm,
like a chestnut.

Wouldn't that be nice!
How lovely!

Like what happened to me
last summer.

Javi, my youngest son,
was restless.

Whenever I turned around,
he'd cross the driveway by himself.

Watch out, you clown!

I'd say, "Stay in the house,

because it's subsidized
by the government.

You're safe here."

But he loved the countryside.

He loved to go camping,
even without a tent.

I'd always say,

"Son, if you aren't coming home,
let me know.

Is that too much to ask?"

What's up? I'm fine.

His brother Julian
got a job as a street cleaner.

The boy was out of his mind.

He wanted to check into an asylum
but the doctor said

there was no need,

that he suffered from nerve endings,

a condition treated
very nicely with pills.

"Quit smoking," I said.

"We'll have to donate your body
to Public Works

to pave the roads with."

Give me a cigarette.

He and his brother

got along great.

You don't have Winston?

Nope.

Forget it then.

It's over.

My only company at home
was a TV set.

It showed me a world full of color,
much less lonely than my own.

By then I was a widow.

At least my husband died
a sweet death.

He died full of liquor,
like a chocolate bon-bon.

He drank whisky
like a baby drinks milk.

The day he died
was a day of mourning

for the Spanish wine industry.

Where have you been all night?

I can't say, Mom.

I can't either.

What happened to my clock?

It fell.

Where are the pieces?

I threw them out.

- Baloney!
- Mom...

Come on, it was worthless anyway.

I'll buy you a better one, okay?

Now you're going to sleep
like a bat?

Javi, find a decent job
like your brother.

Just a quick little nap, Mom.

I'm feeling a bit chilly.

Take off those wet clothes
and dry them on the heater.

The tank isn't here.

You already sold it?

I work so hard
so we can buy things!

It was a gift, Mom.

It wasn't even yours.

Don't worry so much.

I'm can't take it anymore!

I'd rise to work to the call
of the rooster downstairs,

a filthy man

who used to beat my neighbor Blasa.

To those hurt...
To those hurt...

To those hurt by love...

Son of a bitch!

I'll gouge your eyes out,
you bastard!

I loved my neighborhood.

But every morning
I had to leave it behind.

Every lighthouse has its beam.

Every name has its voice.

Every light shines
equally as bright.

Every voice sounds equally as clear.

Every ship fights the current,

crossing its own sea of destiny.

Every ocean...

can be sailed.

Deep in reason,

and mysterious...

is the secret life

of lesser things.

Of lesser things.

Of lesser things.

Of lesser things.

Of lesser things.

- Hi, Flores. How are we doing?
- Bad.

Tell that guy on the 6th floor
to put a diaper on his dog.

She's a mammal
and she gets her period, too.

Tell him yourself,
you're the one with

a degree as a doorman.

Besides, the dog is male.

Male? Yeah, right.
Just like its owner.

Because between us, frankly...
that guy Riki

who lives on the 6th floor...
is gay.

Gay? What's that for?

A fairy, which is what
they've always been called.

But apparently
now they're calling it "gay."

Mr. Riki told me he's married.

Yeah.

Though I've never seen his wife.

And you never will.
You don't know this,

but every weekend he brings
a young guy here,

to the apartment.

Hello, Mr. Riki.

Mr. Ricardo!

Mr. Riki was probably

a millionaire,

because he was swimming in dough.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays
I walked his dog,

which he named after
a luxury supermarket. "Hipercor."

In my neighborhood
we'd have called him "7-11."

Say hi to Candida, Iberico.

- Say hi.
- Hi, Hipercor.

Hi, Hipercor.

Iberico wants to go for a walk.
Will you walk me, Candida?

Flores might be right after all,

that you're homosensual.

So what if I were?

That's exactly what I said.

Women are always

so nosy!

Go on,

go on.

The Countess of Banco de España
introduced me to Riki.

You're still over there, Candida?

Hurry up, it's almost lunchtime.

She was better than sliced bread.

You still have to make lunch
and polish the silver.

Did you like the geranium?

I could take a cutting.

They're pretty but they drink a lot.
And I get the water bill.

All right.

Tomorrow you're going
to make stew without meat.

What matters

- is the flavor.
- Right, the flavor.

Nutrition is also a plus.

Go on, always being so extravagant

and you're always broke.

With what I earn...

You need to economize better,
like everyone else.

Stop splurging.

I'm always helping you out.

Just to show you,
go ahead and take

this carton of milk home,
it has expired.

The count can't drink it,
his stomach

is too sensitive.

You people are used to it,
so it's fine.

Israel has once again violated...

The count had an autographed photo
of King Alfonso XXL,

an Extra Large king.

He had quite an office,

with perishable animals on the walls

and a built-in TV set
with anchors so eloquent

you'd believe anything they said,
even a lie.

Delays, limited access
and random checkpoints

are having a negative impact
on the sick and wounded

in areas affected by the bombing.

Time now for Sports.

We're all worried,

Santi, because it looks like

Nadal's knee injury is acting up...

Well, after those images,
"worried" might not be the word...

But tennis fans certainly must be.

Yes, I suppose.

Clearly...

Finito!

Marichu!

Weapons are awful.

Spare me your nonsense, please!

Without weapons the Moors
would be in the Pyrenees

and you'd be wearing a veil.

Wearing a veil

and without a clitoris!

Luis Pedro, for the love of God.

It's true, woman.

No wonder you have
stomach problems.

You're so tense you're going
to bust an artery vein!

Candida, don't start.

Just like what
my mother-in-law says.

And just what does
your mother-in-law say,

if I may ask?

Fuck you and the horse
you rode in on!

Oh, what a big, fat mouth we have!

Oh, what a big, fat ass we have!

You could fit my daughter-in-law
inside with her hat on.

Forgive my mother-in-law.
She thinks being nice costs money.

She hasn't been the same

since her cerebral orgasm.

I can't wait for her
to be discharged.

Just what I needed,
another mouth to feed.

Goodbye, darling.

Filthy animal! Get out.
I can't even

look at you.

Damn that nasty bitch.

And your husband,
how is he doing?

Grandma, he died three years ago.

So nothing's changed.

I told my Javi,
"Go take care of Grandma."

And he said, "Mom, you go.
I'm going job-hunting."

Me, ugly?

I'll sing the song again.

Come on, kids!

He was always asking me
to buy him a record player.

"Find a steady job
and buy one yourself."

He wanted to be a singer.
He just loved music.

So he started singing
at fancy restaurants.

Mr. Pablo.
The Land Cruiser, right?

With heated seats, eh?

But since they wouldn't
let him inside,

he'd wait for the customers
at the exit and sing in the street.

Well, think about it, Pablo.

We can word the ad
however you like.

The wording is just fine.
"I fly safe."

Change whatever you want.
They're dying for you to.

Look, I do a news show,

not billboards selling trips
to the Caribbean.

You have plenty of colleagues
promoting products.

Right, but to me...

Look, I'm in a huge hurry,
as usual.

I'll call you in a couple days.

Thanks. Sorry.

Damn it!

Who would ever stick
their hand in there?

My, oh, my...
My, oh, my...

Even your feet are pretty as pie.

Even your feet are pretty as pie.

No way in hell.

You can see it there.

It's a cell phone, right?

You can see it shining
in all the crap.

With a taxi charm hanging from it.

Yeah.

No way in hell.

Maybe my brother,
he's got arms more like this...

But my shoulder runs out
at the end of my arm.

Looks like you'll have
to tip the boy, Mr. Pablo.

The phone is long gone.

I was about to say that.

I came out fighting
like my father,

who served in two other wars
after the Civil War.

He got shot in the ear in France

and got shot in the leg in Germany.

He was lucky enough to get injured
in every war he fought in

so he got a double pension.

But we didn't inherit a penny of it.

I must be so deaf

because my father got shot
in the ear.

Because deafness is transmitted
by germs.

Take my eldest son, Teodosio.
He turned from alcoholism

to socialism.

He was so nasty he spent
all his time at the union

accusing people of stuff.

A hardworking and very honest boy.

I'm going, Teodosio.

I left everything spotless.

I almost forgot. While cleaning

I found a bill.

Return it to its owner.

Okay, Mom, I will.

See you Wednesday, son.
Goodbye.

Tickets.

Ma'am!

I have four children.

Three males and a female...

Trini, who I hardly ever see.

Mom!

They're hard to raise,

but later they light up
your life.

Hi, Trini.
What a surprise.

We can't give you a ride, Mom.
Eusebio has a graduation party.

What kind of graduation?

Military!
What a bunch of jerks!

Well, it was nice seeing you.

Kiss the baby for me.

- He must be huge.
- You'll see for yourself.

We left him for you. Give him
some dinner, we didn't have time.

Let's go!

Javi?

Javi!

Javi!

Julian, didn't you have
the night shift?

What are you doing?

Watching TV.
Why?

Where's the TV?

Javi took it.

He needed it.
Why?

You didn't say anything?

No, I was sitting here watching

commercials and didn't notice.
Why?

Shouldn't you be hosing down
the streets?

I quit. The hose
was giving me rheumatism.

Who puts those ideas
into your head?

The Martians.

- The Martians?
- They send me messages

on the TV.
Through the commercials.

Did the Martians tell you

to eat the whole box

- of cookies?
- They said I need fiber

to take care of my insides.

With all that fiber
you'll poop nylon socks.

Do I have to go back
to City Hall tomorrow

to beg them not to fire you?

How many times have I been?

Blasa, dear!

Did that horrible husband of yours

hit you again?

I'm going to throw myself
onto the subway tracks.

Again?

I'm insured as
a street cleaner, so...

we'll collect a million pesetas.
Go pick it up.

Yeah, okay.

Bye, Mrs. Blasa.

Look, Blasa.

You need to file a police report
tomorrow first thing.

Tomorrow it's my turn
to clean the stairs.

Okay, I'll do them for you.

By any chance...

have you made dinner?

I just couldn't drag myself

to the store
after the argument.

Weren't you going
to go kill yourself?

I decided against it
because it's getting chilly out.

Here, I'll see what I can do.

Finger power.

You smoke four packs a day,

two liters of beer,

a kilo each of lentils
and garbanzo beans...

And all at the same time.

You'd eat the whole fridge
if it fit in your mouth.

Have me committed, Mom.

Commit me.
Mom, commit me.

Leave me alone.

Commit me.

Mom, commit me.
Commit me.

Mom!

What are you doing?
This isn't your stop.

- You'll get fired.
- Put me away or I'll kill myself.

- Get on!
- No!

I'll kill myself.

- I can't hear you.
- It's over!

Put me away or I'll kill myself!

Put me away or I'll kill myself!

What are you saying?

Put me away or I'll kill myself!

- Yeah, like yesterday.
- No!

I'll do it!

- Get on the bus.
- Farewell, Mom!

Wouldn't you know!

I... killed myself.

But only a little,

on the outside,

just to show you
how badly I need help.

Your nonsense will kill me
one of these days.

God's angel

told Mary...

...and granted the work
of the Holy Spirit.

Hail Mary, full of grace,

the Lord is with you.

Rub harder or the stains
won't come out.

Blessed are thou amongst women

and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.

Hail Mary, mother of God.

My son Julian
is now a mental patient.

A real shame,

losing the extra money
he brought in.

Until he gets his partial
worker's compensation,

I don't know how we'll get by.

I am the Lord's slave.

Shape me with thy word.

Oh, Lord, shed thy grace upon us.

Through thy angel's intervention we
have met the incarnation of thy son.

You should have this one
committed as well.

You know the count doesn't like
you bringing him over.

Amen.

Don't get up, Candida.

Later your back will hurt
from standing up straight.

You must be careful at your age.

And hurry up,
there's a pile of ironing to do.

Javi, show her the prize I won

in a chocolate egg.

I got fined 10 euros
for losing my subway ticket.

A taxi would have been cheaper.

You're always making trouble
for yourself.

The advantage to cutting
the slices extra thin

is when they fall,
it gives you time

to catch them
before they hit the ground.

Can I have an advance

- for the fine?
- Come on.

I've advanced you money
plenty of times

and the books don't add up.

And another thing,

I have to take the hours
you missed today

out of your pay.
All in all, you make

more than a government official.

Yeah, but they work sitting down
and I'm on my knees all day.

My mother's a widow
and has no support.

Not like you. You have the count
to bring joy to your life.

Joy to my life?

My Luis Pedro?
Try maybe 30 years ago.

Oh, fine.

30 years without your husband
giving you pleasure?

Damn, 30 years!

Then for all

practical purposes,
you're a virgin again.

Look, Candida.

I'm going to do some
window-shopping

to make myself feel better
and when I get back

I don't want to see this boy here.

As long as you're going out,

can you pick me up
two packs of cigarettes?

- Aunt Marichu isn't upset, is she?
- No, no.

Back to our game,
let's finish up.

One, two and three.

Light infantry against knight,
destroyed.

You have to turn around.
And with that column

behind you, you have to withdraw all
your troops from the battlefield.

So my Christians win,
like they did in the real

Battle of Clavijo,
in the name of Santiago.

Santiago the Apostle?

No, Santiago Carillo.
Give me a break. Of course.

The founder of Spain.

Tell me where you got this wallet.

Right now.

I took it from the priest.
Are you happy now?

Give it back. Don't you know
stealing from a priest

is a triple mortal sin?

Can we help you?

I have a confession to make.

- Hail Mary, full of grace.
- Morituti te salutan.

But, my son, did you have
your first communion?

Yeah, but it was a civil service.

Okay, tell me what's bothering you.

What did you do, son?

I took a wallet.
Can I give it to you?

Absolutely not.
I don't want it.

What you must do is return it
to its owner.

I already asked the owner. He said
he absolutely doesn't want it.

Then you can keep it.

Okay.

In the name of the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Go in peace.

And remember,
you bring the Lord joy in heaven.

That's what I was going to say.

Hey, man, if you need anything,
talk to my mom. I'm heading home.

I loved going to the market.

Pure butter.

- You want the head?
- No thanks, Paco.

There you could see animals,
fish and minerals of all races,

without differences
in gender or smell.

We'll settle up on Friday.

- Go with God.
- See you later.

Candida, darling.

How's the family?

Hanging in there.

The youngest is still at home.
A drug addict.

Always selling my stuff.

I can't take it anymore.

If it were me,

I'd take his lazy ass

out to the countryside

to plant potatoes 12 hours a day.
That'd get him off the drugs.

I have mackerel on sale.

- How much?
- 600 pesetas. Three euros.

You'd better just give me

the head that lady left.

I'll make some fish soup
for my son. He loves it.

All right.

They used to show documentaries
about the lives of those fish.

I liked watching them.
But since Javi sold my TV,

I missed all the interesting stuff
on television.

Hi. How are you, Santi?

Fine.

- Hi, Pablo.
- Hi.

Macarena Rivas
from Marsans Travel Agency

called 3 times.
She tried your cell phone

but some clueless weirdo
keeps answering.

What cell phone?
It fell in the sewer.

Why didn't you tell me
so I could cancel it?

Because I haven't had time!

Look, Mom.

You see all this?

Some day, when I die,
this will all be yours.

Are you stupid or what?

Tell me where the TV is.

Come on, let's go.

You'd better go alone.

This is a bad time for me.

Since when do you have
a cell phone?

You must have stole it.

No, a friend lent it to me
so he could track me down.

Then answer it.

All that ringing
is a waste of electricity.

Yes?

- Who are you?
- Waaasssuuup?

Asshole! Couldn't reach it, eh?
Son of a bitch.

He's too uptight.

All right, ma'am?

Actually, my boy got stiffed
and they kept my TV.

Why don't you gentlemen

help us get it back?

Lady, not even the Big Bad Wolf

goes in that slum.

I want my TV back.

Go right ahead, but we can't be
held responsible.

Local cops are such cowards.
So unlike the national guard!

Come on.

Let me borrow a rifle at least.

Go on, scram.

To defend my mother.

Come on.

Show me where you sold the TV.

Come on.

- Where was it?
- There.

Come on, let's go.

Good afternoon, ma'am.

There's been a misunderstanding. My
boy sold my TV without my permission.

What are you saying, lady?

There's no TV here.

No? And whose TV is that?

My husband worked his ass off
for that!

Did he?
Let's make sure.

I happen to still have
the remote control.

There you are.

One, two and three.

It looks like
the master obeys the dog.

The cops are up on that hill. Give
it back or they'll come down here

and take apart your little house.
How about it?

What did you say?

I'll gut you like a pig.

My cousin gave us this TV
4 or 6 years ago.

- I bought that TV myself!
- Bullshit!

I paid 120 euros for it
at the supermarket.

I still have 4 payments left.

It's my only joy.

You'll have to kill me...

How much will you give me?

The 20 euros you gave my son for it.

And I don't have it on me.

So how about it?

Silly Americans!

Milk is healthy.
For my kids, it's ideal...

I'd take his lazy ass
out to the countryside

to plant potatoes 12 hours a day.

That'd get him off the drugs.

Look, Mom.
Look what I picked today.

Great, Javi.
Where's your brother?

Rounding up the cattle
and tilling the fields.

Mom!

Quite a rabbit
for only three people.

What do you mean, three?
We're all here.

"Milk it does a body good."

It helps my boys grow up
nice and healthy.

I want what's best for my family.
We trust nature. We drink milk.

Mister Pablo was always
in such a hurry

he had to look straight ahead
all the time.

Which meant he never looked

at those who were on his side.

The day I met him,

Miss Monica was just about ready
to give up on him.

She was British,

and that very same day
she decided

to move back to New York.

They say there's a great woman
behind every great man.

But if the great man
doesn't turn his head,

he doesn't realize.

And Mister Pablo,
used to being a newscaster,

always looked straight ahead.

Not so fast, Hipercor!

You're so clumsy today.

What do you expect?

I was walking the dog

when a car came along...

Don't remind Iberico.
It upsets him.

You're worried about the dog?

It didn't even touch him.

I'm the one that got flattened.

The car was fantastic.

Good thing I didn't scratch it.

The car is fine.

The driver turned out to be

a newscaster I know on TV.

He was with his very nice wife,
Monica.

She gave me her phone number.

I'm lucky I got run over
by nice people.

Put some clothes on, would you?

You two get along
so well together.

Yeah, it's too bad
we're kept apart

by extenuating circumstances.

People are so cruel.

Poor thing. He's freaked out
from all the commotion.

I'll take him to the sea
this weekend.

Can you believe it?
Two years old and he's never seen

the sea!

I haven't seen it either.

I've got my bucket here
to splash around...

But it's probably nothing like
the big blue sea.

Hello, Candida.

Don't your kids help you out?

Oh, sister.

They show up like ants
on the 1st of the month.

"Mom, give me a kilo of garbanzo
beans." "Mom, give me a jug of oil."

"Money for smokes."
But never around when I need them.

My daughter Trini,

living in style, a fancy car
that looks like an airplane.

She says if she helps me,
she can't help herself.

And this one...

Look at him. A wasted soul.

He needs a job to straighten out.

No, Candida. Not a job.

He needs to stop taking drugs.

I hope he will, sister.

He has to want to.

There are some very good

public therapy centers.
If you can get him to attend,

- he can go to a rehab in the country.
- We filled out the form.

Right, Mom?

But they said that
without a reference letter

there's no way. Kung Fu,

a guy from my neighborhood.

He got in because his uncle's
a sergeant in the army.

You know, the ones who went to
Bosnia. It's all who you know.

Oh, my boy.

Got any coconut yogurt?

He's a handful.

Look, Candida.
With all the houses you clean

and all the places you go,
you must know somebody.

Someone influential
to get him a spot.

I hope we get lucky.

I'll get him started with therapy.

He'd better show up.

I hope so, sister.
Thank you very much.

Come on, Javi.

Oh, my!

Sure, you too.

Wait a second
while I get a stimulant.

- Will you play the song?
- No.

Poor thing, he fell asleep.

What happened?

- Do you think I'm stupid?
- Yes.

Asleep again.

Okay, I'll play
so that the witch goes away.

But you may be the one
to disappear.

Me, a witch?

Take that!

Stop hitting me,

I'll play.

Shit.

It looks like...

there's no music today
because...

some motherfucker out there
stole my tape player.

And if I catch him...

I'll smash his brains in,

dammit!

Hey, don't overdo it, man.
Take it easy.

Take it easy?

Stop, you animal.
You'll kill my son.

He's the only animal here, lady.

And for whatever he's worth,
he'd be better off dead.

It's no big deal, Mom.

No big deal? It says here:

"Court Summons."

As far as I know, honest workers
aren't summoned to appear in court.

It's probably about
my expired driver's license.

I can't take it anymore.

I'd rather die all at once

than a little bit every day.

Your eye is turning black.

The puppeteer left a smudge.

Poor thing.

Mom, you're hurting me.

Mom.

As soon as I record my first song,

I'll buy you a big house
surrounded by maple trees.

If you want to give me a gift,

do like the nun said.
Stop taking drugs.

I want to quit, Mom.

I just can't.

Don't stare, you'll go blind.

Redheads are exactly my type.

A redhead with a big mouth.
Exactly my type.

- Hand the pills over.
- They're for a cough.

What cough do you have?

THREE MONTHS LATER

Feeling guilty,
Javi promised to get a haircut.

But the barber refused.
"You know how long it would take?"

Longer than shaving a donkey.

You could burn it off faster.

"I FLY SAFE."

Then he wanted to try out
for "Spanish Idol."

And he wanted a new track suit.

I told him, "When I see you've quit,
I'll buy you one."

"Mom, I'm already better.
Check out my legs."

"Javi, legs don't mirror the soul."

Mr. Marzán!

You look like you saw a wolf.

Excuse me, have we met?

You almost ran me over,
remember?

Oh, yeah.
What are you doing here?

Nobody answers the number
your wife gave me.

Right. Because I'm never home.

Then why have a phone?
It's a waste

of money.

Sure. Can I help you
with something?

Yes. I came from Madrid.
Can you take me back?

- How did you get here?
- Hey, lady!

Don't try to stiff me.

38 euros, all the way
from downtown.

Plus the return.
We left the city limits.

Madrid is prettier when you don't
have to watch the meter.

Right, right...

It's beautiful.

And my son Javi's taking...

a preparation class on drugs.

He needs a recommendation
for the rehab. You can get him one,

right, son?

He's a good boy.
You'll meet him

when I start working at your house.
Two days a week.

Two days a week?

That might be too much.

- Just Wednesdays?
- Wednesdays?

Here. For that cough.

No, thank you.

- Really.
- Go ahead.

You can take them later.

Can my Javi sing on your TV show?

I like watching

the news and stuff.

I read the paper when I can.

Very interesting, Javier.
Which newspaper do you read?

I like La Razón.

Here we go.

La Razón? La Razón?

That's a right-wing paper. How
could a junkie be a conservative?

Spain is doing great.

How can two crooks like you
say Spain is doing great?

It's never been easier
to rob here!

Spain isn't just doing great,
Spain is the fucking best!

Okay,

all right.

We'll debate this another time.

I'd like to propose

an exercise.

To quit drugs, it helps
to change your environment.

Your neighborhood, habits,
friendships...

Like my mom, she wants me
gardening in the countryside.

Precisely. But it's difficult,
isn't it, Javier?

Like I told her.
It's pretty damn hard.

But...

there is a way. If we can't change
where we live, we change ourselves.

Bullshit!

Let me explain.

The idea is that starting now
we stop being who we are

and we play the role

of a character.

Like theater,
but in our everyday life.

- I want to be Jimi Hendrix.
- Right on.

It might be

a better idea to pick

someone who didn't die
of an overdose.

All right, Javier?

Juanfran, let's hear it.
Who is your character?

Pontius Pilate.

Who knows who Pontius Pilate was?

That motherfucker who almost
took away Easter break!

Okay, okay.

Come on, sit down.

I'm sorry I left so suddenly.
I'm sorry I left you, my love.

But look what I've brought.
We'll make a great stew.

Never leave me again.

You broke my heart.

Pablo, I love to cook.
But for someone.

You were never home.

You weren't the same Pablo anymore.
You'd changed.

Always busy,

always something more important

than our life together.

Look.

You like the color?

We'll paint the whole place.

Start over.
And get rid of that painting.

What's wrong with it?

It's depressing. And ugly.

Tomorrow we start painting.

Tomorrow I can't, darling.
I'm really busy.

Try to understand. I'm in a very
important career moment on TV.

That's all right.
We'll paint the TV too.

What matters is being together.

- Monica? Hello?
- Pablo?

Where are you?

- Pablo?
- Candida?

I can finally hear you.

I'm bringing my son Javi over
tomorrow.

Tomorrow? But tomorrow's Thursday.
Didn't you come today?

You see? I knew two days was better.
He's dying to get started.

Right.

He can do anything.

Can he paint?

What Javi needed
was a nice girlfriend.

He'd been fooling around with
some drug addict he was crazy about

who used him to fix up
her dad's house for free.

He'd say, "Kiss me."

"First change the floor tiles.
We'll kiss and get married."

And Javi changed the floor tiles.

"Kiss me."

"First paint the living room.
We'll kiss and get married."

And Javi painted it.

"Kiss me."

"First fix the leak
in the bathroom."

Finally Javi said
enough was enough.

And she freaked out
and said,

"I won't marry you anymore."

And Javi said, "Why not?"

"Because you didn't fix the leak
in the bathroom."

"So what? We're not getting married
in the bathroom."

She was bad news.

Love is something

you really miss
when you're in love.

My Javi was running around
madly in love all the time.

He just didn't know with who.

A boy as happy as a cartoon rabbit.

And he'd never heard
those magic words:

"I love you, Javi."

Magic words that would have
pulled the poor rabbit

out of the hat of drug addiction.

The Chinese government will sell

stock options for
42 top state companies

to be converted into shares
and traded on the market.

- Bye, Flores.
- Bye, Candida.

I knew all too well,
as the saying goes,

that when God takes hold,
your days are numbered.

But I was determined to rescue my
Javi from his black and white world

and help him cross over
to the colorful, bright, happy world

of TV personalities.

What do you think of the job?
Looks great, eh?

He deserves first prize.
It's truly beautiful!

What the hell is wrong with you?

Are you nuts?
What's your problem?

I'm experimenting with
the spirit of the colors.

Careful.

Perception is more important
than the work itself.

He's doing drug telepathy.

They told him to role-play.

Since we're painting,
he picked Pikachu.

Picasso, Mom.

Picasso.

I'm going for a modern style.
But it's a clean job.

Of course it is.

Look. Very nice.

How's that ham doing, pal?

It's pretty good, it's just...

But I like processed ham better,

it's juicier. This one has

- all this fat on it.
- My boy has quite

an appetite. He's an eater. Might
as well, with the trial tomorrow.

He's got to look healthy.

If you dress up and look nice,
they let you go.

If you look like a slob,
they throw you to the dogs.

He has a trial?

Yeah, tomorrow.

That's why he's going
on a ham binge.

In case he won't see any
for a while.

Don't worry.

Nothing will happen to me, Mom.

If I finish the therapy,
they'll let me in the rehab.

My mother said

you got me a spot, right?

Yeah, more or less.

Don't be mad about the color.

You're the one who chose it.

Dammit, Candida, I said salmon!

Salmon have always been gray.

Gray? Salmon is gray?

At the fish counter.

Candida, please!
I meant the color of salmon

- on the inside!
- I've never seen one on the inside.

Take it easy,

take it easy.

Hey. Don't I know you
from somewhere?

Maybe from TV.
I watch it all the time.

Sure.

But things haven't been the same
since Hermida left.

Here, try a croquette.
They're homemade.

Does Monica like croquettes?

Actually, she loves them.
But she's in the U.S. right now...

Look.

If you want, you can send her
my mother's recipe by Internet.

The phone company
will give you a flat rate.

To those hurt...

To those hurt...

To those hurt by love.

Stop whining!
All you do is whine all day!

What did you say?

I never whined in my whole life!

Not when the roof fell in

and not when they cut off
my mom's breasts!

Schmuck!

- Shut up!
- You want it louder?

Shut up!

To those hurt by love!

- All you do is sing and drink!
- And lay down the law!

To those hurt by love, dammit!

Oh, Blasa.

Come in.

How can you let that filthy creep
hit you like that?

It's nothing, I must have done it
myself when I left in such a rush.

- You want something to drink?
- I don't know.

If you have something cool,
like a Coca-Cola...

It'll have to be Pepsi.

Julian escaped

and showed up with a beard
like Jesus,

holding a file that recommended
he be treated in the emergency room.

It said: "Diagnosis:
paranoid schizophrenia.

Treatment: Modecate in vial form.
Signed:

Public Mental Health coordinator."

Finger power.

Julian, what are you doing here?

I'm out. Why?

- What about the insane asylum?
- No, Mom.

I left. Too many crazy people.

What's wrong with you, boy?

The Martians are after me.
They chase me with a knife

and they, and they...

they want to kill me.

They hit me in the back
with a hammer

and they want to cut me in two

and put one half in each world.

Have you been drinking?

No, ma'am, Mrs. Blasa.

Finger power.

The Martians won't let me.

But...

Do you guys have
hallucinatory states

with self-referential delusions
and general anxiety, or what?

- Probably.
- Please.

A little bit of respect.
King Crimson...

King Crimson's the Beethoven

of our time.
Without his hearing

problems, obviously.

Cover yourself.

Yeah, Beethoven.

I may be your neighbor,
but I'm also a woman.

- Good afternoon.
- We have a summons for you.

You police show up
without my having to call.

The boy's getting dressed,
he'll be right out.

He got 4 years.
You read it, right?

- Who? Julian?
- No. Javier Roman Caño.

He's your son, right?

He was already in jail

for cutting in line at a movie.

They grabbed him so quick

he didn't even see the film.

It's totally unfair.

What an odd painting.

To get the whole picture

you need cable.

He got five years in jail.

He went in clean
and came out a drug addict.

Here I am busting my rear
to get him clean again,

and with you setting up
his spot in the rehab...

Yeah, yeah.

...and he gets busted

for taking two donuts.

Isn't he handsome?
He always looks good in photos.

He's very photographic.

Candida, it says here

he held up a bakery with a weapon.

With a plastic knife you use
to clean your fingernails

while camping.

The baker got spooked
and the kids ran out without paying

to avoid a scene.

Don't worry. We'll find a lawyer who
will get him out. I'll handle it.

Thank you.

Good morning, Don Ricardo!

And company.

You like it?

A slipcover for the jug.

What do you think?

Totally gay.

Here, Flores.

For you.
Hot off the press.

To what do I owe this honor?

Nothing special.

No need to wait

for a specific date
to give a gift.

It's the sheer

- pleasure of giving.
- How nice.

"Inside the Closet."

Do-it-yourself?

It's about closets.

Read it, you'll really

enjoy it.

Can I take a swig?

That's what it's there for.

Here, drink.

Disgusting!

Disgusting? It's tap water.
From this morning.

It tastes like man's sweat.

My water doesn't taste like that.

It must be something
you ate earlier

and it's on your breath,
that's all.

What happened?

He swallowed a cell phone, ma'am.

My son.

How are you?

I can't handle prison, Mom.

I want to leave
and go to the rehab.

I know, but you can't do
these things.

You know how much those phones cost?
You could ruin the machinery.

Don't worry, it came out intact
in his feces.

What fishies?

It came out in the toilet, Mom.

You can pick it up at the exit.

Okay.

Is it the right kind of magazine?

You bet it is.

Brunettes are exactly my type.

A brunette with a small mouth.

Exactly my type.

You know me so well.

Get well soon, son.

Flores.

When I found out it was
Mr. Luis Pedro's saint's day,

I thought,
how about a little gesture.

He's always treated me
with so much respect

and who needs a fixed date
to take pleasure in giving?

Giving is a pleasure in itself.

Sure, I thought.
A pleasure.

Especially on such
an important date

when one feels obliged to give.

Flores.

Come in, man, come in.

I like mine with a little bite.
How about you?

Just a little.

It's nice to still have someone
decent left in the building

to have a cup of coffee with.

There are some very

strange people here.

You shouldn't have.

I chose it myself expressly
for Mr. Count.

See if I got it right.

"Inside the Closet."

Quite a Nativity Scene.

What soldiers,

what bodies.

It would look fabulous
with an embroidered tableskirt.

In the colors of the Spanish flag,
naturally.

Candida.

Mr. Pablo, nice to see you.

- Why are you here so early?
- Otherwise I'd miss you.

You're always at the TV station.
It's like a ghost lives here.

- What's this?
- Tallos.

Tallos?

Here in Madrid they say churros.
What are they called in New York?

- What do I care?
- Because of Monica.

Forget Monica, we're finished.

Men sure are stubborn.

Why don't you surprise her
with a visit?

What, did your husband
surprise you all the time?

Oh, my husband.

My husband

didn't take me anywhere.

Not to the theater.

Never bought me flowers.

Never bought me a cake.

Never took me to dinner.

Just that one time he showed up
with a friend from work

and said,
"Here's some money.

Take your mother-in-law
and your 6 kids to a movie."

I went to the movie,
it was called:

"The Sound of Music."

I hated it

because it was about a nun
who flirts with a lieutenant.

Garbage.

I hardly saw it.

At intermission I said
to my mother-in-law,

"Let's go, I'm not feeling well."

"But it's not over yet."

I was feeling very sick.

I dropped something on the stairs.

When I got home my husband

and his friend were dancing around
in their underwear.

"You ruined my day, you stupid
bitch." That really hurt.

You can't imagine.

What an ugly thing to say.

He looked so happy
and I was so upset.

And he called me that word.

That really got me.

I went in the bathroom,

sat down and a little baby plopped
right out of me, like a baby Jesus,

with a tiny little pebble
for a weenie.

My mother-in-law stuck it

in an empty coffee jar
full of alcohol

and put it on the shelf.
I saw it every day for 6 months.

It was so sad, it looked like a
baby Jesus, so tiny and handsome.

Sitting there for 6 months.

Then I put it in a matchbox,

took it to the cemetery,
and went every day to visit

the beautiful little boy.
What a shame.

I was going to name him Pedro, after
my father, but I never got a chance.

I started bleeding like crazy.

I lost three dozen liters of blood,

an ambulance came,

took me to the hospital
and tied my pipes.

My husband came.

I said, "Listen here.

If you want to be
a father and husband,

you can stay.

Otherwise it's time for you
to be on your way.

Promises are made to be kept."

So he joined the Foreign Legion.
Dumped me with the kids.

You said it, Candida.

Promises are made

to be kept.

Now what about that lawyer
for my son?

Yeah, I'm working on it.

Don't you worry.

A couple weeks in jail
won't kill him.

Prisoners live like kings nowadays.

Yeah,

like kings.

Anyway.

I saw you had two bottles of wine

so I made you some sangria, a little
refreshment for when you get

home from work.

Thanks, Candida.

Don't mention it.

So deep inside me

the heat remains

that warms my heart,

your love remains.

So deep inside me

I can stay alive,

die for love,

die for you.

Like waves

searching for the seashore,

like a sailor searching
for his port and his home.

I searched my soul
hoping I'd find you,

and all I found was loneliness.

And though you may be far away,

so far away from me,

though other men have kissed you...
Maybe, Gwendolyne,

you still remember once upon a time
we were in love.

You still remember me.

I remember once upon a time
you were by my side,

you spoke to me of love,
my smile hadn't faded...

I still remember our love,

and now,

you leave me behind.

I remember once upon a time

when you were by my side.

You spoke of love,

my smile hadn't faded...

Evening, ma'am.

Your phone line is cut, right?

AUTUMN IN NEW YORK FOR 760 EUROS

All right, already!

Hello?

Hello.

- Pablo? Pablo...
- Hello?

Pablo, can't you hear me?

- Candida?
- My son Javi

tried to kill himself.

What happened to that lawyer?

He's very badly burned.

It's a miracle he's alive.

He lit his mattress on fire.

Javi, what did you do?

Nothing, Mom. I just did it
to get out of here.

Enough nonsense. I'm taking you
out of here right now.

Yeah, my mom told me. You're
looking into all the paperwork,

is that right?

Thanks a lot.

When I'm better I'll paint
your bedroom an interesting color.

I've got another fish picked out.

Your son's a hero, Candida.

Yeah, a war hero.

Tell me how I can help.

Well...

Maybe you could put me on TV

so I can say hi to my brother.

I'll be here tomorrow
with a camera.

You promise?

I swear.

You can't send him back to prison
in this condition.

Don't worry, ma'am.
In terminal cases like this

they get sent home.

Turn right now.

Don't tell me what to do!

I know what it means
to be far away.

When I was 12 the ladies from Social
Services separated me from my mother

and sent me to a boarding school.

The five years I was there I never
received a single letter or visitor.

Not a single kiss.

Sundays I'd see the rich kids
hugging their parents

and I felt completely left out.

Excuse me,
you're not allowed in here.

I was here yesterday,
I promised to come back.

You can't bring all that in here.

Look, I'm Pablo Marzán...

Yeah, Pablo Marsans,
from Marsans Travel. So what?

You can't come in here!

- Where are you going?
- Hi, doctor.

I want to see Javier Roman. I was
here yesterday with his mother.

I made a promise,
and I have to keep it.

You don't say.

He isn't here, I promise.

- They moved him yesterday afternoon.
- Where?

I loved her so much.

She was everything to me.

She was my heart and soul.

This isn't happening!

Where has life taken me?
I'd rather stay home!

Where do I have to go now?

Who is it? Over.

Candida?

My mom's not here. Why?

- Are you Julian?
- Yes. Why?

I'm looking for your brother Javier.

They took him away. Over.

Away where?
Back to the hospital?

No. Why?

Away where?

To bury him and stuff.

He died last night.
Why?

Okay, over and out.

Wait, Julian.
Where's your mother?

She went to City Hall to see

if she could get a grave.

When is the funeral?

I'm in a meeting with
the Martians right now,

they're showing me commercials.

Come up and wait for my mom
up here if you want.

In the name of the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit.

We commend to Thee our servant...

Javier.

My boy died because
he lost his life.

He was perfectly healthy,
and he was totalled like a car.

Nice people always finish first.

At least he was out
of that cold prison.

He went out nice and warm
like a roasted chestnut.

My poor sweet little boy,
God preserve his soul.

What's wrong?

Is there sound?

We're in.

You're live.

I bet we'll finish late because of
him. What the hell is going on?

No idea.

I'm not getting a proper signal.
I'm not taking responsibility.

You're stupid.

Excuse me a second.

I have an interesting story

for all of you.

This morning Javi died.
He was 22 years old.

Go to Sports!

Close-up on Santi.

You're in!

Barcelona will leave...

Ronaldinho on the bench
against Betis...

Does Ronaldinho like croquettes?

The question whether
they'll use Mesi or not.

Allow me to introduce
my friend Candida.

She makes the best chicken
croquettes in the world.

What do you want me to say, son?

She's Javi's mother.

A boy who wanted to be somebody,
overlooked by a fool like me.

Should we cut?

No way. I'm retiring in two months.
I want this on my resume.

Give me a close-up
of the old lady.

This is something else,
Don Luis Pedro.

Now you've got a first-rate
Nativity Scene.

Isn't that woman your...?

Now I've seen it all.
The maid on the news!

We shouldn't be ashamed
to say nice things.

The world is ugly enough as it is
without us ruining it.

Being nice doesn't cost money.

I've been scrubbing floors

and cleaning stairs all my life,

and everything washes away.

I never saw a stain,
no matter how tough,

that didn't come out with water.

You don't know how it feels
to lose a child.

The world is full of lonely people

like my son

who died without love.

What those people really need
is to be kissed by someone.

Because kisses are soft like water.

They wash away
the stains of loneliness.

If we just helped each other...

This remote is a piece of crap!

Not to disagree or anything,

but that remote control

was my cell phone.

Because the truth is,
we all come from Adam's pork chop.

Take homosensuals, for example.

It's nobody's fault
they're like that.

And people are so critical.

Always bad-mouthing them.

Isn't that the lady
who walks Iberico?

That woman can do anything.

I admire her.

They don't hurt anyone.

For example,
I clean a writer's house...

His name is Ricardo Aramendi

and he lives on the corner
of Conde de Aranda St. and Serrano

at number 17, on the 4th floor.

And to be frank, well...

he's a fairy.

Apparently

he wants a young guy
to move in.

Where the hell did that bitch

get the idea

that I'm gay?

- It's nobody's business.
- What are you laughing at?

You'd better not be behind this,
I'll send you to boarding school.

It wasn't me, Dad.

She's nuts.

Wait till Mom hears.

She'll use this as an excuse

- to not let me see you.
- Use what?

I should knock your head off!

Look at yourself.
You're a wreck.

Ever since Monica left you.

Why don't you go after her?

You spend all day on TV.
You're eating yourself up.

They say too much TV
is bad for your eyes.

Give her a call,
use the company phone.

It's free, they pick up the tab.
Call her.

- Hello?
- Miss Monica?

It's Candida.
The woman you ran over.

What?

You hit me with the car,
remember?

Oh, right. How are you?

Don't hang up, hold the line.

Monica?

Monica, it's Pablo.

Pablo. And I...

I love you, Monica.

I love you with all my heart.

When I get up in the morning,

in the street at lunchtime,

when I look out the window,
when I dream at night...

I love you all the time.

You're the best thing
that's ever happened to me.

And I beg you to give me
another chance.

He's in bad shape.

He's all in pieces,
like Frankenstein.

He deserves another chance.

I'll finish up and come find you.

And together we'll go
wherever you want.

Come live in suburbia,

by the freeway.
There's some great public housing.

Go and take a look.

I love you, Monica.

I want to have kids with you.

Two.

Better make it four.

Two each if you get divorced.

Kids are the joy of any home.

Okay, Monica...

I love you.

I love you too, Pablo.

Anyway...

That's enough telephone.

Pablo?

- Candida...
- She got the message.

Don't overdo it.

All right, ladies and gentlemen.
We're signing off for today.

Please forgive

the confusion. Part of doing
a live show, I'm afraid.

We leave you with a special message
from our sponsor.

I hope you enjoy it.

Put it in, dammit!

All the lunatics in the asylum went
nuts when they saw Julian on TV.

Fellow Spaniards. I have contacted
the Martians. I have bad news.

The Martians are idiots.
My name is Julian. Finger power.

I'm returning to the asylum
at the request of the Martians.

I advise all of you out there
to do the same.

Put yourselves away.

Okay, Pablo, buddy.
Is that enough?

And another thing.

I'd like everybody to know that
although I don't suffer from stress,

I'm a carrier.

Champion! Champion!

All my neighbors congratulated me.

"You looked great on TV, Candida."
"That was amazing!"

A man on the train said,

"I recognize you, ma'am.
I've seen you on the news."

"Of course you recognize me.
I've been living here for 30 years."

I was hoping to go home again,
but without my Javi,

Julian committed and my
mother-in-law in the hospital,

who needed me?

So I thought, "Enough already.
I can leave it all behind."

I took Pablo up on his offer

and went to New York
on an arrow-plane.

That looks like ice down there.

Those are clouds, Candida.

Then if the sky is down there,

we must be flying upside down.

Maybe the pilot is deaf.

Something to drink?

No, I can't.

I need to go to the bathroom.

Use the lavatory.

No, I'm not budging from here.

I got a good window seat.

Someone might take it.

This woman will flip in America.

The ones who are going to flip
are the Americans.

I can't believe the hats
you Americans wear.

In Spain only the Three Kings wear
them for the Christmas parade.

Wait here, Candida.
I'll go in and ask.

Is that how you're going to ask
at each house?

American girls are too easy.

Well if it isn't Miss Monica!

You haven't changed.

A bit skinnier,
but we'll fix that in no time.

You have to teach me.

They're easy to make.

The trick is to bread them twice
so they don't fall apart

when you fry them.

Javi's dream came true after all.

We imported the recipe to America.

This is like

living in an electric train set.

You like it, Candida?

It's beautiful.

Americans are so nice.

Though not as hairy
as in the movies.

Yeah,

I saw "Planet of the Apes."

American actors,

and they were hairy.

Candida.

What would you like to do
while you're here?

Nothing special.
Whatever you do here in America.

Run! Run!

Candida, run!

Candida, stop!

Look, for Hipercor.

Life is great in America.

This is like a dream for me.

You and Pablo have got it made.

Like Abraham and Eve
in earthly paradise.

What's the surprise?

- Let's see.
- Now.

We have a favor to ask.

If you need money, I'm broke.

If you can't afford the country,

start off in public housing
like everyone else.

- It's not that.
- Then what is it?

Hold on.

Over here.

You'll see.

If you like it, it's yours.

If I like it? It's only missing
the three chickens.

- How can I ever repay you?
- With Visa, Mastercard, American...

How nice!

It's my son Julian.

He put in a new chip so he could
call me from the hospital.

- Hello?
- Mom...

When are you coming home?

Aren't you in the hospital?

I got out and stuff.

I got a job and I miss you a lot.

As a street cleaner again?

No, it's a travel gig

I got from being on TV and stuff.

I'm with Grandma, she got out.

We bought you a present.

Finger power.

Come home and you can see it.

Okay, son. I love you.
Take care.

I love you, son.

It's hard to make a dream come true.

But once you do,
you've reached your goal.

Then no more dreaming.
It's time to wake up again.

And when a mother

wakes up happy
like I did last summer,

she only thinks about one thing.

Tending her little chicks.

Candida, this is for Julian.

- Thank you.
- Hope he likes it.

Okay, Candida.

Right.

Let's have some beers
and paint the house together.

Paint the house?
I can't right now, Pablo.

I have to finish the sculpture

for the show. You'll have
to take care of the house...

Sure, that's life.