Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,836 --> 00:00:04,005
Previously on Bob Hearts Abishola...
2
00:00:04,105 --> 00:00:05,172
So this is what we do:
3
00:00:05,272 --> 00:00:07,041
Chukwuemeka and I get back together,
4
00:00:07,141 --> 00:00:08,910
and you have your happy son.
5
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:10,077
So happy.
6
00:00:10,177 --> 00:00:13,681
Then, you and I
will need to see the women
7
00:00:13,781 --> 00:00:16,383
to see who is fit to
bear your grandchildren.
8
00:00:16,483 --> 00:00:18,720
- Wait, what?
- Shh.
9
00:00:18,820 --> 00:00:22,223
Why would you get any say in
who this new woman should be?
10
00:00:22,323 --> 00:00:23,925
The same reason you get a say.
11
00:00:24,025 --> 00:00:25,159
I am his mother.
12
00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:26,728
And I am his Kemi.
13
00:00:26,828 --> 00:00:27,861
Do I get a say?
14
00:00:31,733 --> 00:00:33,667
So, what do you think, Auntie?
15
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:38,339
I can find no fault
with this arrangement.
16
00:00:38,926 --> 00:00:40,975
Oh, we have not met.
17
00:00:41,075 --> 00:00:43,244
- I am Chukwuemeka.
- This is Morenike.
18
00:00:43,344 --> 00:00:45,412
A cousin of Abishola
staying with her family.
19
00:00:45,512 --> 00:00:47,081
It is wonderful to meet you.
20
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:48,649
You as well.
21
00:00:48,750 --> 00:00:50,184
- Are you a student?
- Yes.
22
00:00:50,284 --> 00:00:51,753
At Wayne State.
23
00:00:51,853 --> 00:00:53,187
I went to Wayne State.
24
00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:54,956
I'm studying to become a pharmacist.
25
00:00:55,056 --> 00:00:57,124
Uh-uh, you are kidding.
26
00:00:57,224 --> 00:00:58,325
I am a pharmacist.
27
00:00:58,425 --> 00:00:59,961
It must be fate that we met.
28
00:01:00,061 --> 00:01:01,362
Yes.
29
00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:04,631
What are the odds you'd
meet another failed doctor?
30
00:01:05,389 --> 00:01:07,188
_
31
00:01:07,602 --> 00:01:09,871
My little Puff Puff,
I need your magic hands.
32
00:01:09,971 --> 00:01:12,073
There's a knot in my neck.
33
00:01:12,173 --> 00:01:14,642
I would worry more about
that hump on your back.
34
00:01:14,742 --> 00:01:17,645
Oh. Hello, Auntie.
35
00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:20,582
I thought I felt the
temperature drop a few degrees.
36
00:01:20,682 --> 00:01:22,617
I tried to tell you Mummy was here,
37
00:01:22,717 --> 00:01:25,119
but you were singing
Tina Turner so loud.
38
00:01:25,219 --> 00:01:27,789
Because that is the only
way to sing Tina Turner.
39
00:01:29,962 --> 00:01:31,693
I thought you had Bible study.
What happened?
40
00:01:31,793 --> 00:01:33,761
Did you finish the book?
41
00:01:33,861 --> 00:01:36,798
Tonight I will be doing God's work here.
42
00:01:36,898 --> 00:01:38,800
Then I will let you
two and God get to it.
43
00:01:40,356 --> 00:01:41,603
We have chosen who will be
44
00:01:41,703 --> 00:01:43,838
the mother of Chukwuemeka's children.
45
00:01:45,673 --> 00:01:48,442
I thought we decided we'd
make that choice together.
46
00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:49,944
I thought that, too, but you seem
47
00:01:50,044 --> 00:01:53,014
to find a flaw in everyone I suggest.
48
00:01:53,114 --> 00:01:54,716
I did not realize you
wanted your son to settle
49
00:01:54,816 --> 00:01:56,183
for someone less than perfect.
50
00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:57,952
- He already has.
- Oh, it's not his fault,
51
00:01:58,052 --> 00:02:00,021
a boy cannot choose his own mother.
52
00:02:00,121 --> 00:02:02,123
Stop fighting.
53
00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:04,025
Please sit. Please sit.
54
00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:09,096
Kemi, my love,
55
00:02:09,196 --> 00:02:11,132
I know you want what is best for me.
56
00:02:11,232 --> 00:02:13,534
Mm-hmm.
57
00:02:13,635 --> 00:02:16,070
So please do not be angry straightaway.
58
00:02:16,170 --> 00:02:18,040
At least give it a chance.
59
00:02:18,074 --> 00:02:19,907
This girl is from a prestigious family.
60
00:02:20,007 --> 00:02:22,410
She is studious, devoutly religious.
61
00:02:22,483 --> 00:02:24,846
And, most importantly, does not
62
00:02:24,946 --> 00:02:27,615
have any sons the same
age as Chukwuemeka.
63
00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:29,751
Funmbi is six months younger!
64
00:02:29,851 --> 00:02:32,419
Kemi, we have chosen Morenike.
65
00:02:32,519 --> 00:02:34,088
Abishola's cousin.
66
00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:38,059
Oh. I see.
67
00:02:38,159 --> 00:02:40,494
And have you spoken to her about this?
68
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:42,997
Not yet, we were going
to bring it up in church.
69
00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:45,800
Well, that's good.
70
00:02:45,900 --> 00:02:47,802
I'm so happy she's going again.
71
00:02:48,970 --> 00:02:51,473
She was angry with God
for such a long time.
72
00:02:51,491 --> 00:02:52,806
What are you talking about?
73
00:02:53,607 --> 00:02:55,576
Oh, she didn't tell you?
74
00:02:55,677 --> 00:02:56,711
I shouldn't say anything.
75
00:02:56,811 --> 00:02:58,579
Why was she angry with God?
76
00:02:59,714 --> 00:03:01,649
Well, you didn't hear this from me,
77
00:03:01,749 --> 00:03:03,851
but she has been married before.
78
00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:06,821
To the Dark Prince.
79
00:03:07,580 --> 00:03:08,723
The Fallen Angel.
80
00:03:10,191 --> 00:03:13,627
- Satan!
- Nonsense.
81
00:03:13,728 --> 00:03:16,630
May God strike me down if I am lying.
82
00:03:18,458 --> 00:03:19,533
There you go.
83
00:03:45,233 --> 00:03:46,834
You're still here?
84
00:03:46,934 --> 00:03:48,269
Everybody's gone for the day.
85
00:03:48,369 --> 00:03:49,804
I hate bringing work home with me.
86
00:03:49,904 --> 00:03:51,706
I'll sleep a lot better
knowing this is done.
87
00:03:51,806 --> 00:03:54,209
You know, when you got demoted
to the warehouse floor,
88
00:03:54,309 --> 00:03:55,410
I didn't think your ego could take it,
89
00:03:55,510 --> 00:03:56,811
but I was wrong.
90
00:03:56,911 --> 00:03:58,446
Sometimes people surprise you, Bob.
91
00:03:58,546 --> 00:04:00,015
Hmm.
92
00:04:00,115 --> 00:04:01,149
Anyway, for my next
company car, should I
93
00:04:01,249 --> 00:04:03,118
go Camaro SS or stick with a Corvette?
94
00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:05,720
This is what you've been working on?
95
00:04:05,820 --> 00:04:07,288
For two days.
96
00:04:07,388 --> 00:04:09,324
I'm so stressed,
I almost called in sick.
97
00:04:09,828 --> 00:04:10,995
Let me help you.
98
00:04:11,196 --> 00:04:12,965
You're not getting a new company car.
99
00:04:13,261 --> 00:04:14,729
So we're extending the lease
100
00:04:14,829 --> 00:04:16,331
- on the one I've got now?
- No.
101
00:04:16,431 --> 00:04:18,199
- We're buying it out?
- No.
102
00:04:18,299 --> 00:04:19,800
I don't see any other option.
103
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:21,902
You're not management anymore.
104
00:04:22,003 --> 00:04:23,071
If I get you a company car,
105
00:04:23,171 --> 00:04:24,205
I'm gonna have to get one for everybody.
106
00:04:24,731 --> 00:04:26,307
That's really generous of you.
107
00:04:26,407 --> 00:04:28,143
It's not happening, bud.
108
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:30,778
Look, I get it.
109
00:04:30,878 --> 00:04:33,081
As my boss, you can't be seen
giving me special treatment.
110
00:04:33,181 --> 00:04:34,449
Exactly.
111
00:04:34,549 --> 00:04:35,750
But as my big brother...
112
00:04:35,850 --> 00:04:37,452
As your big brother, no car, idiot.
113
00:04:38,819 --> 00:04:40,088
You struck an employee!
114
00:04:42,470 --> 00:04:43,991
I'm telling Mom!
115
00:04:45,289 --> 00:04:47,671
_
116
00:04:48,786 --> 00:04:50,198
Abishola. What is
117
00:04:50,298 --> 00:04:51,832
the medical term for webbed feet?
118
00:04:51,932 --> 00:04:53,000
Syndactyly.
119
00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:54,435
Thank you.
120
00:04:54,535 --> 00:04:56,037
What are you doing?
121
00:04:56,833 --> 00:04:58,739
I'm creating a fake Wikipedia page
122
00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:00,075
about Morenike's family.
123
00:05:00,175 --> 00:05:02,009
They are a sickly bunch.
124
00:05:02,110 --> 00:05:04,212
I am part of Morenike's family.
125
00:05:04,312 --> 00:05:07,415
Oh, good.
I can put "gigantism" in there.
126
00:05:08,483 --> 00:05:10,251
Why are you doing all this?
127
00:05:10,351 --> 00:05:11,719
I have to convince Ogechi
128
00:05:11,819 --> 00:05:13,988
that Chukwuemeka is
marrying a genetic dud.
129
00:05:14,089 --> 00:05:15,656
I think that is a terrible idea.
130
00:05:15,756 --> 00:05:16,791
What choice do I have?
131
00:05:16,891 --> 00:05:18,793
I am fighting for the love of my life.
132
00:05:18,893 --> 00:05:19,927
By spreading lies on the Internet?
133
00:05:20,027 --> 00:05:21,862
What else is the Internet for?
134
00:05:23,064 --> 00:05:25,366
Boy, the things that go on
under that wig.
135
00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:28,269
I am sorry, Gloria, but I am desperate.
136
00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:30,071
And if either of you
cared about me at all,
137
00:05:30,171 --> 00:05:32,807
you would give me the medical
term for overly large ears.
138
00:05:32,907 --> 00:05:34,041
Macrotia.
139
00:05:34,142 --> 00:05:35,276
Thank you.
140
00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:37,778
I will pair that with
"tiny head disease."
141
00:05:37,878 --> 00:05:39,080
Microcephaly.
142
00:05:39,180 --> 00:05:40,915
Stop helping her!
143
00:05:42,538 --> 00:05:44,306
_
144
00:05:46,821 --> 00:05:48,063
Hold still.
145
00:05:48,098 --> 00:05:50,391
- It stings.
- Do not be such a baby.
146
00:05:50,491 --> 00:05:53,094
Last week,
someone on the floor lost a finger.
147
00:05:53,194 --> 00:05:54,895
I did not hear about that.
148
00:05:54,995 --> 00:05:57,365
And as long as I am safety manager,
no one ever will.
149
00:05:58,533 --> 00:06:00,635
Just got my paycheck.
150
00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:01,769
I don't know how you guys do it.
151
00:06:01,869 --> 00:06:03,037
Do what?
152
00:06:03,138 --> 00:06:06,274
You know, live on, you know, this.
153
00:06:06,374 --> 00:06:08,042
You have to be frugal.
154
00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:11,412
I don't know what that is.
155
00:06:11,512 --> 00:06:13,314
It is very simple.
156
00:06:13,414 --> 00:06:16,117
In life, there are things
that you need to survive,
157
00:06:16,217 --> 00:06:18,186
and things that bring you joy.
158
00:06:18,286 --> 00:06:20,188
Remove all joy.
159
00:06:20,851 --> 00:06:22,223
Then what's the point of living?
160
00:06:22,323 --> 00:06:24,425
I do not recommend asking
yourself that question.
161
00:06:25,826 --> 00:06:27,662
You do not need to buy joy,
162
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:28,954
it is everywhere.
163
00:06:28,989 --> 00:06:30,097
A quiet sunrise,
164
00:06:30,198 --> 00:06:31,866
a warm summer breeze,
165
00:06:31,966 --> 00:06:34,135
a discarded joke book
you find on the sidewalk.
166
00:06:34,235 --> 00:06:35,736
You found that book on the sidewalk?
167
00:06:35,836 --> 00:06:37,205
I think it found me.
168
00:06:38,939 --> 00:06:40,841
Look, it's easy for you guys to say,
169
00:06:40,941 --> 00:06:43,844
you were born into... frugacity?
170
00:06:43,944 --> 00:06:45,746
Fru... frugaliciousness?
171
00:06:45,846 --> 00:06:46,847
Frugality.
172
00:06:46,947 --> 00:06:48,249
And I grew up with money.
173
00:06:48,349 --> 00:06:49,884
My father was a judge.
174
00:06:49,984 --> 00:06:50,985
Really?
175
00:06:51,085 --> 00:06:53,254
What happened?
176
00:06:53,354 --> 00:06:55,823
I decided to forgo my father's wealth
177
00:06:55,923 --> 00:06:58,393
and come to this country
to make my own way.
178
00:06:58,493 --> 00:07:00,661
Whoops.
179
00:07:00,761 --> 00:07:02,163
I support my family,
180
00:07:02,263 --> 00:07:03,664
I own my own home,
181
00:07:03,764 --> 00:07:05,833
and I enjoy my work.
182
00:07:05,933 --> 00:07:06,934
What else is there?
183
00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:09,970
So much, you have no idea.
184
00:07:11,206 --> 00:07:13,741
You made the same choice I did, Douglas.
185
00:07:14,248 --> 00:07:17,178
- What do you mean?
- You left your cushy office job,
186
00:07:17,278 --> 00:07:19,146
to make an honest living
on the warehouse floor.
187
00:07:19,847 --> 00:07:22,383
Well, my mom made me do it.
188
00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:23,884
But you did it.
189
00:07:23,984 --> 00:07:26,387
And now you have the pride that comes
190
00:07:26,487 --> 00:07:28,022
with making an honest living.
191
00:07:28,122 --> 00:07:29,857
Standing on your own two feet.
192
00:07:29,957 --> 00:07:32,993
Yeah. I guess I do.
193
00:07:33,702 --> 00:07:34,895
Huh.
194
00:07:34,995 --> 00:07:36,431
Thanks, guys.
195
00:07:39,033 --> 00:07:40,892
That was nice, what you said.
196
00:07:40,927 --> 00:07:42,303
It was nonsense.
197
00:07:45,199 --> 00:07:47,355
_
198
00:07:47,842 --> 00:07:49,310
More tea, Chukwuemeka?
199
00:07:50,069 --> 00:07:51,346
Yes, please.
200
00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:54,014
Such a lovely girl.
201
00:07:54,114 --> 00:07:55,216
Yes.
202
00:07:55,316 --> 00:07:57,017
She also cooks, cleans
203
00:07:57,117 --> 00:07:59,720
and has all of her original teeth.
204
00:08:00,369 --> 00:08:01,369
Just like her uncle.
205
00:08:03,391 --> 00:08:04,859
I thought you had a bridge.
206
00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:06,961
And you have seven fillings.
207
00:08:07,061 --> 00:08:09,697
There, all our secrets are out.
208
00:08:11,065 --> 00:08:13,934
Oh, e kaale, everyone.
209
00:08:14,034 --> 00:08:15,903
E kaale, Abishola.
210
00:08:16,003 --> 00:08:17,672
Your mail is on the table there.
211
00:08:17,772 --> 00:08:20,040
- Oh, thank you for keeping it.
- Mm-hmm.
212
00:08:21,008 --> 00:08:23,311
And opening it.
213
00:08:23,411 --> 00:08:26,381
Congratulations on your
new credit card limit.
214
00:08:26,481 --> 00:08:28,283
Very exciting.
215
00:08:30,457 --> 00:08:32,253
Morenike, I insist that you come
216
00:08:32,353 --> 00:08:34,822
to Nigeria with Chukwuemeka
and me next month.
217
00:08:34,922 --> 00:08:36,791
But, Auntie, I have school.
218
00:08:36,891 --> 00:08:39,093
You will do it online.
219
00:08:39,193 --> 00:08:40,695
Mummy, please.
220
00:08:40,795 --> 00:08:42,196
There is no need to rush this.
221
00:08:43,008 --> 00:08:45,300
You're already behind on
giving me my grandchildren.
222
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,521
There will have to be twins to catch up.
223
00:08:47,761 --> 00:08:50,271
Those also run in our family.
224
00:08:50,371 --> 00:08:52,807
- Who has a twin?
- My uncle.
225
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,208
He ate his twin in the womb.
226
00:08:54,309 --> 00:08:57,378
Must you air all our dirty laundry?
227
00:09:01,234 --> 00:09:03,718
Look at us. Carpool buddies.
228
00:09:03,818 --> 00:09:05,886
Uh-huh.
229
00:09:05,986 --> 00:09:07,254
So, how was your day?
230
00:09:07,355 --> 00:09:09,189
- You were there.
- Well...
231
00:09:09,290 --> 00:09:10,791
I was there,
232
00:09:10,891 --> 00:09:11,992
but I wasn't there.
233
00:09:14,877 --> 00:09:16,163
Come on, Mom.
234
00:09:16,263 --> 00:09:18,733
You know, we can't squander
these precious minutes.
235
00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:21,702
We don't know how many Tuesdays
with Dottie we have left.
236
00:09:21,802 --> 00:09:23,938
I've got plenty of Tuesdays left.
237
00:09:25,506 --> 00:09:26,974
Sure.
238
00:09:29,977 --> 00:09:31,779
Oh. Hey, Douglas. What's up?
239
00:09:31,879 --> 00:09:32,880
Where are you?
240
00:09:32,980 --> 00:09:34,315
Driving Mom home.
241
00:09:34,415 --> 00:09:36,016
You forget something?
242
00:09:36,116 --> 00:09:37,685
I don't think so.
243
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:39,854
Me! I don't have a car!
244
00:09:39,954 --> 00:09:41,188
Oh, shoot, that's right.
245
00:09:41,288 --> 00:09:42,292
I'm sorry.
246
00:09:42,323 --> 00:09:43,424
You gonna come back and get me?
247
00:09:43,524 --> 00:09:44,959
Well...
248
00:09:45,059 --> 00:09:46,193
Can't you just take an Uber?
249
00:09:46,293 --> 00:09:48,095
I don't make that kind of money anymore!
250
00:09:48,195 --> 00:09:49,229
I'm frugal!
251
00:09:49,330 --> 00:09:50,898
You're a smart boy, Douglas.
252
00:09:50,998 --> 00:09:52,166
Figure out a way to get home.
253
00:09:52,266 --> 00:09:53,300
Hang on.
254
00:09:53,401 --> 00:09:55,803
Goodwin, is the forklift street-legal?
255
00:09:55,903 --> 00:09:56,904
No.
256
00:09:57,004 --> 00:09:58,594
I'm out of ideas, Christina!
257
00:09:59,273 --> 00:10:01,709
- Just hang up on him.
- Really?
258
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:03,043
You have my permission.
259
00:10:04,244 --> 00:10:06,681
- Christina?
- Good luck, Douglas!
260
00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:11,262
_
261
00:10:15,473 --> 00:10:16,757
Do you need help?
262
00:10:16,857 --> 00:10:18,292
Oh. No, thank you, Auntie.
263
00:10:18,393 --> 00:10:20,895
Ah. You know you do not
have to call me Auntie.
264
00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:23,197
Ah. I must respect my elders,
265
00:10:23,297 --> 00:10:25,165
or my mother will reach across the ocean
266
00:10:25,265 --> 00:10:27,067
and hit me with her shoe.
267
00:10:27,167 --> 00:10:28,403
Okay.
268
00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:31,459
Well, as an elder,
may I give you some advice?
269
00:10:31,494 --> 00:10:32,525
Of course.
270
00:10:32,560 --> 00:10:34,041
You are a sweet girl.
271
00:10:34,141 --> 00:10:36,811
You came here to study.
Do not jeopardize that.
272
00:10:36,911 --> 00:10:38,413
What do you mean?
273
00:10:38,513 --> 00:10:40,915
This whole Chukwuemeka situation
is a lot more complicated
274
00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:42,817
than they are telling you.
275
00:10:42,917 --> 00:10:44,218
There's another party involved.
276
00:10:44,993 --> 00:10:47,087
- You mean Kemi.
- You know about her?
277
00:10:47,187 --> 00:10:48,322
Of course.
278
00:10:48,423 --> 00:10:50,124
And do not worry,
she will not be a problem.
279
00:10:50,224 --> 00:10:52,226
I don't think you understand.
280
00:10:52,326 --> 00:10:54,721
Kemi is always a problem.
281
00:10:55,463 --> 00:10:57,297
You do not want her as an enemy.
282
00:10:57,398 --> 00:10:59,700
Perhaps she does not
want me as an enemy.
283
00:11:00,254 --> 00:11:01,335
You?
284
00:11:01,436 --> 00:11:05,105
Back home,
whenever a snake got in the house,
285
00:11:05,205 --> 00:11:07,041
I was the one to take care of it.
286
00:11:07,732 --> 00:11:09,844
Others were too scared.
287
00:11:09,944 --> 00:11:13,781
But I knew,
all you have to do is be patient, eh?
288
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:16,116
Let the snake believe it is safe,
289
00:11:16,216 --> 00:11:19,286
and then in one swift motion,
290
00:11:19,386 --> 00:11:20,387
chop off its head.
291
00:11:25,493 --> 00:11:28,228
Would you like some more tea?
292
00:11:28,328 --> 00:11:30,197
Auntie?
293
00:11:37,383 --> 00:11:39,778
- Oh, hello, Kemi.
- Chukwuemeka.
294
00:11:40,392 --> 00:11:42,181
I just came to pick up a few things.
295
00:11:42,801 --> 00:11:44,517
Two Clif Bars...
296
00:11:45,558 --> 00:11:48,120
and strawberry-flavored lubricant?
297
00:11:48,221 --> 00:11:49,888
There was a sale on Clif Bars.
298
00:11:51,089 --> 00:11:52,925
And the strawberry lubricant?
299
00:11:53,025 --> 00:11:55,228
Oh. That is for my next lover.
300
00:11:55,328 --> 00:11:58,764
Or lovers.
I like to keep my options open.
301
00:11:58,864 --> 00:12:00,566
What is going on?
302
00:12:01,385 --> 00:12:04,437
You are starting a new life,
and so am I.
303
00:12:04,537 --> 00:12:07,806
Ooh. I have coupons.
304
00:12:09,022 --> 00:12:10,709
Shouldn't we talk about this?
305
00:12:10,809 --> 00:12:11,910
There's nothing to talk about.
306
00:12:12,010 --> 00:12:13,679
Your mother has made up her mind.
307
00:12:13,779 --> 00:12:15,548
You will marry Morenike
308
00:12:15,648 --> 00:12:18,451
and have dull children with giant ears.
309
00:12:19,618 --> 00:12:21,420
But I still want to be with you.
310
00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:23,922
Well, you cannot have my cake
and eat it, too.
311
00:12:24,923 --> 00:12:26,525
I'd like a bag, please.
312
00:12:26,625 --> 00:12:28,994
- Paper or plastic?
- Plastic!
313
00:12:31,196 --> 00:12:33,155
How about we honeymoon in Greece?
314
00:12:33,190 --> 00:12:34,800
Oh, I love a gyro.
315
00:12:34,900 --> 00:12:38,070
So you are picking our
honeymoon based on a sandwich?
316
00:12:38,170 --> 00:12:39,672
Not just the sandwich.
317
00:12:39,772 --> 00:12:42,675
The history, the architecture,
the beaches.
318
00:12:42,775 --> 00:12:44,543
I thought you hated beaches.
319
00:12:44,643 --> 00:12:46,144
Well, I did about 50 pounds ago.
320
00:12:46,245 --> 00:12:48,013
But now I want to strut my stuff.
321
00:12:48,113 --> 00:12:50,015
You know they have nude beaches.
322
00:12:50,115 --> 00:12:52,651
Eating a gyro in my birthday suit.
323
00:12:52,751 --> 00:12:54,953
Now that's a honeymoon.
324
00:12:55,053 --> 00:12:57,456
Everything okay?
325
00:12:57,556 --> 00:12:58,691
Kemi is upset.
326
00:12:58,791 --> 00:13:00,693
And the sky is blue.
327
00:13:00,793 --> 00:13:02,027
What'd she do this time?
328
00:13:02,127 --> 00:13:03,996
This one is not entirely her fault.
329
00:13:04,096 --> 00:13:05,798
Wait, no, actually it is.
330
00:13:07,165 --> 00:13:09,668
Here's an idea, maybe sit this one out.
331
00:13:09,768 --> 00:13:11,003
Oh, what are you talking about?
332
00:13:11,103 --> 00:13:13,672
I'm just saying Kemi's
got a lot of problems.
333
00:13:13,772 --> 00:13:15,107
Catch her on the next one.
334
00:13:15,207 --> 00:13:17,410
I can't. She is my friend.
I have to help her.
335
00:13:17,510 --> 00:13:19,645
Do you?
336
00:13:19,745 --> 00:13:21,947
You know, when I was a kid,
every year my friends would
337
00:13:22,047 --> 00:13:23,582
drag me to this haunted corn maze.
338
00:13:23,682 --> 00:13:24,683
It was horrifying.
339
00:13:24,783 --> 00:13:26,552
Hands coming through the stalks,
340
00:13:26,652 --> 00:13:28,086
clowns with chainsaws.
341
00:13:28,186 --> 00:13:29,488
Were there real ghosts?
342
00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:31,402
No.
343
00:13:31,437 --> 00:13:33,158
So why were you scared?
344
00:13:33,258 --> 00:13:34,860
I was ten, but that's not the point.
345
00:13:34,960 --> 00:13:36,829
Ten is old enough to know.
346
00:13:36,929 --> 00:13:38,931
Can I finish my story, please?
347
00:13:39,031 --> 00:13:40,566
Continue.
348
00:13:40,666 --> 00:13:42,067
After a few years,
349
00:13:42,167 --> 00:13:44,537
I realized I didn't have
to go through the maze.
350
00:13:44,637 --> 00:13:46,572
I could just duck out,
grab a taffy apple,
351
00:13:46,672 --> 00:13:48,073
and meet my buddies by the exit.
352
00:13:48,708 --> 00:13:52,144
So, Kemi's love life
is a haunted corn maze?
353
00:13:52,244 --> 00:13:54,913
And she's the clown with the chainsaw.
354
00:13:56,978 --> 00:13:59,633
_
355
00:13:59,852 --> 00:14:01,754
I am not a manipulative person,
356
00:14:01,854 --> 00:14:03,456
but it's hard to do nothing
357
00:14:03,556 --> 00:14:05,123
when you see people making bad decisions
358
00:14:05,223 --> 00:14:06,914
and ruining their lives.
359
00:14:07,793 --> 00:14:11,096
Your Chewbacca dude doesn't
know what he's losing.
360
00:14:12,096 --> 00:14:13,399
Chukwuemeka.
361
00:14:14,065 --> 00:14:15,568
Yeah, I'm never gonna get that.
362
00:14:16,635 --> 00:14:17,903
You know,
I'm going through something very similar
363
00:14:18,003 --> 00:14:19,617
right now with my Corvette.
364
00:14:19,652 --> 00:14:20,873
How is that similar?
365
00:14:20,973 --> 00:14:23,141
I was forced to give up
something that I love.
366
00:14:24,118 --> 00:14:25,944
It wasn't sexual like your relationship,
367
00:14:26,044 --> 00:14:28,947
but I did have sex in it.
368
00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:32,017
Not easy.
369
00:14:32,117 --> 00:14:33,619
It was very tight.
370
00:14:33,719 --> 00:14:35,921
Even when you were alone.
371
00:14:37,089 --> 00:14:39,725
I suppose Chukwuemeka is
a bit like a Corvette.
372
00:14:39,825 --> 00:14:44,029
Sexy, powerful, a fun ride.
373
00:14:44,606 --> 00:14:46,965
But at the same time,
it's a gas guzzler.
374
00:14:47,065 --> 00:14:48,434
Mm.
375
00:14:48,534 --> 00:14:50,168
If Chukwuemeka eats
even a little cheese,
376
00:14:50,268 --> 00:14:52,971
his body backfires like an old tractor.
377
00:14:54,857 --> 00:14:56,675
The Vette didn't even
have a rear camera.
378
00:14:56,775 --> 00:14:59,578
Was constantly bumping into
trash cans and short people.
379
00:14:59,678 --> 00:15:02,515
Hmm. And nobody would call Chukwuemeka
380
00:15:02,615 --> 00:15:05,418
the sharpest razor in the
CVS men's grooming aisle.
381
00:15:06,519 --> 00:15:08,153
There you go.
382
00:15:08,253 --> 00:15:09,888
Chewbacca, Corvettes.
383
00:15:10,704 --> 00:15:11,924
We're better off without 'em.
384
00:15:13,125 --> 00:15:15,060
Maybe so. Hmm.
385
00:15:17,696 --> 00:15:19,131
It's my stop.
386
00:15:19,231 --> 00:15:20,533
Nice talking to you.
387
00:15:20,633 --> 00:15:22,935
And you. What is your stop?
388
00:15:23,035 --> 00:15:25,738
I don't have one.
I gave the driver my address.
389
00:15:26,717 --> 00:15:28,006
Okay.
390
00:15:30,676 --> 00:15:31,877
I got to tell you,
391
00:15:31,977 --> 00:15:33,512
I think I've become a better Christian
392
00:15:33,612 --> 00:15:34,880
since coming to this church.
393
00:15:34,980 --> 00:15:36,081
That's wonderful.
394
00:15:36,682 --> 00:15:38,183
Why do you think that is?
395
00:15:38,283 --> 00:15:39,918
The singing? The praying?
396
00:15:40,018 --> 00:15:41,920
Honestly, I think it's the food.
397
00:15:42,020 --> 00:15:44,189
I could get baptized in that soup.
398
00:15:44,289 --> 00:15:46,559
Hello, Bob.
399
00:15:46,659 --> 00:15:47,793
Hello, Abishola.
400
00:15:47,893 --> 00:15:48,994
- Hello, Auntie.
- Auntie.
401
00:15:49,094 --> 00:15:51,520
Where is that old woman
402
00:15:51,555 --> 00:15:52,931
that you fraternize with?
403
00:15:53,031 --> 00:15:55,200
- Old woman?
- Easy. Easy.
404
00:15:55,815 --> 00:15:57,436
I have not seen Kemi today.
405
00:15:57,536 --> 00:15:59,805
And praise God for that.
406
00:16:00,873 --> 00:16:02,204
Good morning, Auntie.
407
00:16:02,239 --> 00:16:03,642
Morenike.
408
00:16:03,742 --> 00:16:05,844
Have you killed any snakes lately?
409
00:16:06,446 --> 00:16:09,229
There was one, but I scared it away.
410
00:16:09,264 --> 00:16:10,716
There's snakes in this church?
411
00:16:11,498 --> 00:16:12,885
Hello, everybody.
412
00:16:13,449 --> 00:16:15,488
God is good. Hmm?
413
00:16:15,588 --> 00:16:18,657
Hello, Kemi. Who is your friend?
414
00:16:18,757 --> 00:16:21,460
Sure, let's call him my "friend."
415
00:16:22,142 --> 00:16:23,515
This is Terrence.
416
00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:25,234
We work together at the hospital.
417
00:16:25,269 --> 00:16:27,766
- Hello.
- How you doing?
418
00:16:27,866 --> 00:16:29,868
I like your aftershave.
Smells like strawberries.
419
00:16:40,893 --> 00:16:41,897
See?
420
00:16:41,927 --> 00:16:43,496
Not so bad.
421
00:16:43,596 --> 00:16:45,431
And nobody's stabbing anybody.
422
00:16:45,531 --> 00:16:47,523
Okay. We didn't think that, Douglas.
423
00:16:47,558 --> 00:16:48,701
Well, I did. That's why...
424
00:16:48,801 --> 00:16:51,337
I'm not carrying any cash!
425
00:16:54,086 --> 00:16:55,790
Really? So I got to pay your fares?
426
00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:58,511
How much is it, a dime?
427
00:16:58,611 --> 00:17:00,346
Oh, my God, Mom!
428
00:17:04,849 --> 00:17:06,285
Sorry. It should work.
429
00:17:06,320 --> 00:17:07,745
I put money on it yesterday.
430
00:17:07,780 --> 00:17:09,188
Don't worry about it.
431
00:17:09,497 --> 00:17:11,791
- I have cash.
- Relax. It's on me.
432
00:17:12,357 --> 00:17:14,394
I saw you help out that rich
old lady and her daughter.
433
00:17:16,195 --> 00:17:18,097
You do what you can.
434
00:17:18,197 --> 00:17:19,832
You can always tell the people
435
00:17:19,932 --> 00:17:21,801
who've never ridden a bus before.
436
00:17:21,901 --> 00:17:24,201
They act like they're going
on a poor person safari.
437
00:17:24,237 --> 00:17:27,873
Their entitlement's disgusting.
438
00:17:28,504 --> 00:17:29,574
Olivia.
439
00:17:30,275 --> 00:17:31,911
Douglas.
440
00:17:32,011 --> 00:17:33,445
Actually, Doug.
441
00:17:33,545 --> 00:17:34,814
Down-to-earth Doug.
442
00:17:35,573 --> 00:17:36,816
That's what my buddies...
443
00:17:36,916 --> 00:17:38,751
in the warehouse call me.
444
00:17:38,851 --> 00:17:40,519
Where I work.
445
00:17:41,296 --> 00:17:43,689
You know, with my hands.
446
00:17:43,789 --> 00:17:45,490
Everything is so sticky.
447
00:17:45,591 --> 00:17:46,692
Do you have a wet wipe?
448
00:17:46,792 --> 00:17:50,062
No, because I don't have a purse!
449
00:17:51,964 --> 00:17:54,600
Those weirdos are
making me uncomfortable.
450
00:17:55,274 --> 00:17:57,036
You mind giving me your number
in case they try to follow me
451
00:17:57,136 --> 00:17:58,170
when I get off the bus?
452
00:17:58,270 --> 00:17:59,772
I'm not gonna do that.
453
00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:02,541
Was worth a try.
454
00:18:02,642 --> 00:18:04,777
Guess you'll just have
to ride again tomorrow
455
00:18:04,877 --> 00:18:06,612
so I know you're okay.
456
00:18:08,274 --> 00:18:09,715
I guess I will.
457
00:18:09,815 --> 00:18:12,184
'Cause I don't have a car.
458
00:18:13,058 --> 00:18:14,920
And I take the bus.
459
00:18:15,020 --> 00:18:16,488
To my job.
460
00:18:18,858 --> 00:18:20,726
At a warehouse.
461
00:18:24,196 --> 00:18:25,498
Bus driver seems cute.
462
00:18:25,598 --> 00:18:26,598
Don't talk to me, don't talk to me,
463
00:18:26,699 --> 00:18:27,833
don't talk to me.
464
00:18:55,110 --> 00:18:57,782
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
31479
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.