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1
00:00:01,727 --> 00:00:03,727
I mean, when my
boyfriend Oscar found out
2
00:00:03,820 --> 00:00:05,671
that my best friend Max
told me he wanted to kiss me,
3
00:00:05,898 --> 00:00:07,339
I didn't know how he'd react.
4
00:00:07,675 --> 00:00:08,675
Oscar?
5
00:00:08,843 --> 00:00:10,751
Are you there?
6
00:00:10,903 --> 00:00:11,903
Are you mad?
7
00:00:11,995 --> 00:00:14,238
Damn Joey Lawrence and his big mouth.
8
00:00:14,331 --> 00:00:15,906
I forgot to mention that part.
9
00:00:15,924 --> 00:00:19,000
Oscar found out about the whole
Max thing from Joey Lawrence.
10
00:00:19,020 --> 00:00:20,911
You remember that show,
right? It was, like, him
11
00:00:20,929 --> 00:00:23,080
and the sister with the
flower hat. She used to, like,
12
00:00:23,098 --> 00:00:24,672
- dance like this...
- Whoa!
13
00:00:24,692 --> 00:00:26,692
Exactly! "Whoa!" Anyway,
14
00:00:26,843 --> 00:00:29,086
Oscar didn't say anything
for almost three minutes,
15
00:00:29,104 --> 00:00:30,345
and I was starting to freak out.
16
00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:33,115
I'm starting to freak
out. Say something.
17
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:35,868
Okay, now you're
standing. Is standing good?
18
00:00:36,095 --> 00:00:38,370
I mean, it can be. That movie
Stand and Deliver was good,
19
00:00:38,597 --> 00:00:41,265
but Stephen King's The
Stand was so scary.
20
00:00:41,358 --> 00:00:43,208
You... picked... me!
21
00:00:43,435 --> 00:00:45,269
Over Max, with his perfect hair,
22
00:00:45,287 --> 00:00:47,379
chiseled jaw and searing blue eyes.
23
00:00:47,606 --> 00:00:49,423
So you're not mad?
24
00:00:51,034 --> 00:00:53,777
(LAUGHING)
25
00:00:53,796 --> 00:00:55,779
He was not mad. (CHUCKLES)
26
00:00:55,872 --> 00:00:58,039
In fact, things got a little smoky,
27
00:00:58,059 --> 00:00:59,284
if you know what I mean. (CHUCKLES)
28
00:00:59,451 --> 00:01:00,875
(CHUCKLES) That's a nice story.
29
00:01:00,969 --> 00:01:02,043
Can I have my coffee now?
30
00:01:02,063 --> 00:01:03,113
Oh! Yeah. (CHUCKLES)
31
00:01:03,122 --> 00:01:05,380
Sorry. Enjoy! (CHUCKLES)
32
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,983
Little tip: don't ask
her how her day's going.
33
00:01:09,070 --> 00:01:11,028
Hi. How are you doing today?
34
00:01:11,888 --> 00:01:12,963
Fine.
35
00:01:12,981 --> 00:01:15,240
I'm fine, too. You want to know why?
36
00:01:15,467 --> 00:01:17,859
It all started at Mr.
Meowskers' funeral.
37
00:01:17,970 --> 00:01:19,561
♪ Me, oh, my, oh, my, oh, me ♪
38
00:01:19,655 --> 00:01:21,822
♪ Nothin' wrong with you
but I'd rather be me. ♪
39
00:01:22,663 --> 00:01:24,496
Special delivery for
Ms. Katharine Silver.
40
00:01:24,648 --> 00:01:27,407
Well, golly gee, that's me. (CHUCKLES)
41
00:01:28,169 --> 00:01:29,501
Is this actually mine though?
42
00:01:29,653 --> 00:01:31,170
No, kiss is the special delivery.
43
00:01:31,321 --> 00:01:32,596
- That's just a prop.
- (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
44
00:01:32,673 --> 00:01:33,730
Oh, my goodness,
45
00:01:33,823 --> 00:01:36,824
I cannot get over how cute y'all are.
46
00:01:36,844 --> 00:01:38,235
How long you been dating now?
47
00:01:38,253 --> 00:01:39,661
How long have we been dating?
48
00:01:39,755 --> 00:01:40,846
Well, when do we start counting?
49
00:01:40,997 --> 00:01:42,222
Yeah, is it the first time we met?
50
00:01:42,408 --> 00:01:43,608
Ooh, or the first time we kissed?
51
00:01:43,742 --> 00:01:46,410
Or the, uh, first time we, you know...
52
00:01:46,503 --> 00:01:48,812
You mean the first time
I rocked your world?
53
00:01:49,915 --> 00:01:52,265
Let's just go with when you met.
54
00:01:52,418 --> 00:01:53,692
Almost four months.
55
00:01:53,843 --> 00:01:55,360
Aw. How y'all gonna celebrate?
56
00:01:55,512 --> 00:01:58,530
Marty and I got our ears pierced
on our four-month anniversary.
57
00:01:58,682 --> 00:02:01,366
Oh, uh, we don't really
have anything planned.
58
00:02:01,518 --> 00:02:02,926
Did you want to do something?
59
00:02:02,945 --> 00:02:04,594
I got both my ears pierced in college.
60
00:02:04,688 --> 00:02:05,779
They got really infected.
61
00:02:05,931 --> 00:02:06,947
I almost lost a lobe.
62
00:02:07,099 --> 00:02:09,041
But I am willing to
roll the dice for you.
63
00:02:09,268 --> 00:02:10,434
(CHUCKLES) No, that's okay.
64
00:02:10,452 --> 00:02:12,619
I... I like your ears
just the way they are.
65
00:02:12,771 --> 00:02:14,028
They are nice.
66
00:02:14,048 --> 00:02:15,964
Very soft.
67
00:02:16,942 --> 00:02:18,217
As weirdly soothing as this is,
68
00:02:18,368 --> 00:02:20,777
I should probably deliver
this package before I lose it.
69
00:02:20,796 --> 00:02:21,962
Does that happen often?
70
00:02:22,114 --> 00:02:24,514
Officially? No.
71
00:02:26,209 --> 00:02:28,227
Oh! You forgot your phone!
72
00:02:28,378 --> 00:02:29,378
One more kiss for the road?
73
00:02:29,379 --> 00:02:31,121
Permission to dip my best gal?
74
00:02:31,139 --> 00:02:33,607
Permission granted, sailor.
75
00:02:34,309 --> 00:02:36,886
- (CLEARS THROAT LOUDLY)
- (YELLS)
76
00:02:36,887 --> 00:02:38,570
- Oh! Oh, God!
- Ow!
77
00:02:40,890 --> 00:02:42,390
- (GROANS)
- (EXHALES)
78
00:02:42,484 --> 00:02:43,742
Okay.
79
00:02:43,893 --> 00:02:45,318
(PANTING)
80
00:02:45,471 --> 00:02:46,987
Catch you on the flip side.
81
00:02:47,139 --> 00:02:49,973
- Toodles!
- Did you just say "toodles"?
82
00:02:49,992 --> 00:02:52,251
He started it with "flip side."
83
00:02:53,312 --> 00:02:54,312
I don't know how to
act when he's around.
84
00:02:54,313 --> 00:02:55,420
No, I get it.
85
00:02:55,647 --> 00:02:57,422
I just really hope we can get past this.
86
00:02:57,574 --> 00:02:59,983
I don't expect you to
be besties or anything.
87
00:03:00,002 --> 00:03:02,076
I'm lying. I do.
88
00:03:02,170 --> 00:03:04,263
I did kinda like him before.
89
00:03:04,431 --> 00:03:05,747
Yeah, let's build on that.
90
00:03:05,841 --> 00:03:09,101
You know, you can't just
throw away "kinda like."
91
00:03:10,829 --> 00:03:12,437
I guess I'm up for it if Max is.
92
00:03:12,606 --> 00:03:13,606
Thank you.
93
00:03:13,757 --> 00:03:15,165
Oh. I landed on this.
94
00:03:15,183 --> 00:03:16,257
Are you gonna get in trouble?
95
00:03:16,277 --> 00:03:17,501
No. Happens all the time.
96
00:03:17,519 --> 00:03:20,070
- Really?
- Officially? No.
97
00:03:21,857 --> 00:03:23,340
(SIGHS) Okay.
98
00:03:23,433 --> 00:03:24,449
I have to go.
99
00:03:24,676 --> 00:03:25,843
- I'm gonna be late for work.
- (WHINES SOFTLY)
100
00:03:25,844 --> 00:03:27,193
Aw, just five more minutes.
101
00:03:27,288 --> 00:03:28,513
No, you said that ten minutes ago.
102
00:03:28,530 --> 00:03:30,122
You're like a sexy snooze button.
103
00:03:30,273 --> 00:03:31,273
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
104
00:03:31,350 --> 00:03:33,292
You know you talk in your sleep?
105
00:03:33,443 --> 00:03:35,294
- Did you know you fart in yours?
- Yeah.
106
00:03:35,521 --> 00:03:38,038
- You told me in your sleep.
- (LAUGHS)
107
00:03:38,190 --> 00:03:40,040
What's the deal with this tattoo?
108
00:03:40,192 --> 00:03:41,967
Uh, it's a fish.
109
00:03:42,118 --> 00:03:44,044
I can see it's a fish.
110
00:03:44,196 --> 00:03:45,637
What does it mean?
111
00:03:45,789 --> 00:03:46,789
What's it matter?
112
00:03:46,865 --> 00:03:47,955
I don't know. I mean,
113
00:03:48,050 --> 00:03:49,791
there's just so much
I don't know about you.
114
00:03:49,810 --> 00:03:52,627
Well, I like keeping
things mysterious with us.
115
00:03:52,721 --> 00:03:54,554
You know, we are secret hookup friends,
116
00:03:54,648 --> 00:03:56,873
not "know your time of birth" friends.
117
00:03:56,966 --> 00:03:59,209
Wait, I'll give you a ride.
118
00:03:59,227 --> 00:04:00,635
We can't show up at the same time.
119
00:04:00,729 --> 00:04:03,046
Kat is already suspicious
about where I've been sleeping.
120
00:04:03,139 --> 00:04:05,807
Wouldn't it just be easier
to tell everyone about us?
121
00:04:05,901 --> 00:04:06,901
Nope.
122
00:04:06,994 --> 00:04:09,219
Okay, but before you go,
123
00:04:09,312 --> 00:04:11,221
one small detail about you.
124
00:04:11,314 --> 00:04:12,405
Your middle name.
125
00:04:12,499 --> 00:04:13,907
Nope.
126
00:04:14,059 --> 00:04:15,225
Thank you
127
00:04:15,243 --> 00:04:17,210
for the intercourse.
128
00:04:23,177 --> 00:04:25,010
Hey. I brought you something.
129
00:04:25,161 --> 00:04:26,327
Ooh, muffin.
130
00:04:26,380 --> 00:04:27,904
I asked you not to
call me that. (CHUCKLES)
131
00:04:27,923 --> 00:04:31,257
(CHUCKLES) Your dad would be
proud to know his jokes live on.
132
00:04:31,352 --> 00:04:32,926
(CHUCKLES) Hey, uh, while I'm here,
133
00:04:33,020 --> 00:04:34,928
maybe we could talk
about the Oscar thing?
134
00:04:35,022 --> 00:04:37,230
(PLAYING PIANO)
135
00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:39,691
Come on, Max. This is important.
136
00:04:39,843 --> 00:04:41,418
(CONTINUES PLAYING)
137
00:04:41,511 --> 00:04:43,737
Fine. We'll do it your way.
138
00:04:47,776 --> 00:04:48,943
- (PLAYING PIANO)
- ♪ You can't use music ♪
139
00:04:48,944 --> 00:04:51,828
♪ To avoid the subject ♪
140
00:04:52,764 --> 00:04:53,872
♪ Watch me ♪
141
00:04:54,099 --> 00:04:56,190
♪ Come on, I really want you ♪
142
00:04:56,210 --> 00:04:58,693
♪ And Oscar to get along ♪
143
00:04:58,712 --> 00:05:01,028
♪ That sounds awkward ♪
144
00:05:01,048 --> 00:05:02,881
♪ Maybe if you hung out a little ♪
145
00:05:03,108 --> 00:05:04,883
♪ Things would get better ♪
146
00:05:05,110 --> 00:05:08,387
- ♪ Please? Please? ♪
- ♪ No, no ♪
147
00:05:08,614 --> 00:05:11,047
♪ Please? Please? Please? ♪
148
00:05:11,875 --> 00:05:12,875
♪ What would we even do? ♪
149
00:05:12,951 --> 00:05:15,310
♪ I'm not sure ♪
150
00:05:16,063 --> 00:05:19,231
♪ Oscar likes kites ♪
151
00:05:20,734 --> 00:05:23,551
♪ I've never successfully
gotten one off the ground ♪
152
00:05:23,570 --> 00:05:25,462
♪ Kids used to make fun of me ♪
153
00:05:25,480 --> 00:05:29,199
♪ But thank you for unlocking
that painful memory ♪
154
00:05:29,968 --> 00:05:32,077
♪ Okay, no kites ♪
155
00:05:32,971 --> 00:05:34,246
♪ How 'bout racquetball? ♪
156
00:05:34,397 --> 00:05:35,822
- (LAUGHS)
- ♪ Or pickleball? ♪
157
00:05:35,974 --> 00:05:37,157
♪ Or other balls ♪
158
00:05:37,251 --> 00:05:38,583
♪ That men play together ♪
159
00:05:38,810 --> 00:05:40,326
♪ Stop, I'll think of something ♪
160
00:05:40,479 --> 00:05:42,812
- (LAUGHS)
- ♪ Thank you ♪
161
00:05:42,831 --> 00:05:44,981
♪ I got to get back to work ♪
162
00:05:45,074 --> 00:05:47,667
♪ But it's been really
fun talking this way ♪
163
00:05:47,761 --> 00:05:49,836
♪ I'm coming round to it ♪
164
00:05:49,988 --> 00:05:51,488
♪ Get off your ass ♪
165
00:05:51,506 --> 00:05:55,825
♪ And help me unload this beer! ♪
166
00:05:55,919 --> 00:05:57,686
- (SONG ENDS)
- (KAT CHUCKLES)
167
00:06:01,349 --> 00:06:03,016
Look at this soft kitty.
168
00:06:03,017 --> 00:06:04,853
Are these not the furriest
paws you've ever seen?
169
00:06:04,854 --> 00:06:06,260
Clearly you have not spent
170
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,780
a lot of time around Mama's feet.
171
00:06:09,675 --> 00:06:11,675
Oh, Katharine, I brought
you a little something.
172
00:06:11,693 --> 00:06:12,859
Oh, thank you.
173
00:06:13,011 --> 00:06:15,770
- What is it?
- It's a fertility statue.
174
00:06:15,869 --> 00:06:17,110
For your anniversary.
175
00:06:17,262 --> 00:06:20,205
Put it above your bed
next time you and Oscar,
176
00:06:20,356 --> 00:06:22,023
you know, make pudding.
177
00:06:22,934 --> 00:06:27,028
This is why I was 19 before
I knew where babies came from.
178
00:06:27,047 --> 00:06:29,622
How did you know it was my anniversary?
179
00:06:29,716 --> 00:06:31,032
A little birdie told me.
180
00:06:31,126 --> 00:06:32,884
Tweet, tweet.
181
00:06:33,036 --> 00:06:35,295
So, what are you and Oscar gonna do?
182
00:06:35,389 --> 00:06:40,507
Kat seems surprisingly reluctant
to mark this momentous occasion.
183
00:06:40,526 --> 00:06:42,543
It's not momentous. It's four months.
184
00:06:42,637 --> 00:06:45,789
Yes, the longest
relationship you've ever had.
185
00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:47,322
There should be fireworks.
186
00:06:47,549 --> 00:06:48,657
Banks should close.
187
00:06:48,884 --> 00:06:50,884
Drag queens should dress like you.
188
00:06:50,902 --> 00:06:51,993
(CHUCKLING)
189
00:06:52,162 --> 00:06:54,329
(SIGHS) Well, I-I suppose
I could do something.
190
00:06:54,556 --> 00:06:56,665
But I've got to play it cool.
I don't want to scare him off.
191
00:06:56,816 --> 00:06:58,166
You remember what happened with Ben.
192
00:06:58,317 --> 00:07:00,502
♪ It's only been three weeks ♪
193
00:07:00,729 --> 00:07:04,063
♪ But I think you're kinda neat ♪
194
00:07:04,082 --> 00:07:07,008
♪ So this may be precursory ♪
195
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:10,428
♪ But happy anniversary! ♪
196
00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:15,166
I think we should break up.
197
00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:19,429
I wouldn't want a grandchild
with Ben's eyebrows anyway.
198
00:07:19,581 --> 00:07:20,838
Oh, I have an idea.
199
00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:25,251
How 'bout I help cook a nice,
tasteful dinner for you and Oscar.
200
00:07:25,270 --> 00:07:26,436
No tap shoes needed.
201
00:07:26,688 --> 00:07:28,797
Oh, you're like my own little Cupid.
202
00:07:28,948 --> 00:07:31,949
Oh, I'll bring my bow
and arrows! (CHUCKLES)
203
00:07:32,043 --> 00:07:33,043
Metaphorically.
204
00:07:33,119 --> 00:07:35,345
I don't need another lawsuit.
205
00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:39,032
What-what are you doing?
206
00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:40,624
I'm just getting it warmed up.
207
00:07:40,644 --> 00:07:42,310
Stop it!
208
00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:45,480
(ALARM RINGING)
209
00:07:46,465 --> 00:07:48,525
(RINGING CONTINUES)
210
00:07:50,528 --> 00:07:51,877
What's going on?
211
00:07:52,030 --> 00:07:53,713
Oh. I was trying not to wake you.
212
00:07:53,865 --> 00:07:55,047
I'm meeting Max to go running.
213
00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:58,142
Really? Oh, that's great! I'm so happy!
214
00:07:58,294 --> 00:08:00,720
Can I come? No, no, no,
you guys need to bond.
215
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:04,148
Um, hey, I was just thinking...
if you're not busy tonight,
216
00:08:04,300 --> 00:08:06,225
maybe we could do something
for our anniversary.
217
00:08:06,377 --> 00:08:07,877
Sure. What'd you have in mind?
218
00:08:07,970 --> 00:08:10,213
Um, just, like, a little
dinner. No big deal.
219
00:08:10,231 --> 00:08:12,715
A year anniversary...
that would be a big deal.
220
00:08:12,734 --> 00:08:14,009
You know? Eight months... medium deal.
221
00:08:14,052 --> 00:08:15,827
But this, you know, it's no big deal.
222
00:08:16,054 --> 00:08:18,162
Got it. Little dinner, no big deal.
223
00:08:18,389 --> 00:08:19,497
See you tonight.
224
00:08:22,852 --> 00:08:23,895
Oh. Randi.
225
00:08:23,896 --> 00:08:26,170
- Good morning!
- Is it?
226
00:08:28,491 --> 00:08:30,591
(DOOR CLOSES)
227
00:08:32,495 --> 00:08:35,471
Hey! I just got to stop for a minute!
228
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:37,908
We're not so much running together
229
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,018
as I'm chasing you. (EXHALES)
230
00:08:41,262 --> 00:08:44,263
- (PANTING)
- Okay, maybe I was pushing it a bit.
231
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:46,858
I just wanted to win at something.
232
00:08:47,585 --> 00:08:50,344
- You're taller.
- Thank you. I needed that.
233
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,088
(CHUCKLES)
234
00:08:52,106 --> 00:08:54,365
Listen, I know things have
been awkward between us,
235
00:08:54,517 --> 00:08:55,849
and I know it's my fault.
236
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:57,777
You mean 'cause you made
a move on my girlfriend?
237
00:08:57,929 --> 00:08:58,929
(PANTING)
238
00:08:58,930 --> 00:09:00,038
Well...
239
00:09:00,189 --> 00:09:03,041
if you want to get technical about it.
240
00:09:04,269 --> 00:09:06,102
Yeah. I owe you an apology.
241
00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:07,861
Cool. (PANTING)
242
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:10,006
Cool.
243
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:12,308
Was that it?
244
00:09:12,368 --> 00:09:14,594
Oh, I thought it was. Uh...
245
00:09:15,463 --> 00:09:16,463
I will elaborate.
246
00:09:16,539 --> 00:09:18,614
Um...
247
00:09:18,633 --> 00:09:19,873
You're a nice guy,
248
00:09:19,967 --> 00:09:21,875
and you didn't deserve what I did.
249
00:09:21,895 --> 00:09:23,803
Neither did she.
250
00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:24,897
I'm sorry.
251
00:09:24,956 --> 00:09:26,289
I can forgive you
252
00:09:26,307 --> 00:09:28,733
- if we never have to go running again.
- (CHUCKLES)
253
00:09:28,884 --> 00:09:29,884
Deal.
254
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,569
- How 'bout pancakes?
- Great.
255
00:09:31,796 --> 00:09:33,296
But... I need you
256
00:09:33,314 --> 00:09:34,414
- to do me a favor.
- Sure.
257
00:09:34,557 --> 00:09:35,740
Carry me.
258
00:09:35,967 --> 00:09:37,075
(LAUGHS)
259
00:09:38,636 --> 00:09:39,911
(DOOR OPENS)
260
00:09:42,398 --> 00:09:44,640
Stop calling the café for coffee.
261
00:09:44,733 --> 00:09:46,142
Stop keeping me up all night.
262
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:47,234
You don't mean that.
263
00:09:47,328 --> 00:09:48,920
- No, I do not.
- (CHUCKLES)
264
00:09:49,738 --> 00:09:50,904
Well, you know, Kat asked me
265
00:09:50,998 --> 00:09:52,648
to take her lingerie shopping later.
266
00:09:52,741 --> 00:09:55,242
Maybe I'll pick up something
you might enjoy.
267
00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:57,202
Ooh. I would like that,
268
00:09:57,355 --> 00:09:58,930
Miss Randi Elizabeth.
269
00:09:59,081 --> 00:10:00,932
What the hell did you just call me?
270
00:10:01,083 --> 00:10:02,675
Your name?
271
00:10:02,827 --> 00:10:04,660
- But who told you?
- I ain't no snitch.
272
00:10:04,753 --> 00:10:07,087
- Was it Phil?
- Yes. Damn it!
273
00:10:07,849 --> 00:10:09,215
What else did he tell you about me?
274
00:10:09,216 --> 00:10:10,757
Nothing. Why are you
so upset about this?
275
00:10:10,937 --> 00:10:12,770
Because I asked you not
to pry into my business
276
00:10:12,864 --> 00:10:14,680
and you did it anyway.
277
00:10:14,774 --> 00:10:16,090
I got to get back to work.
278
00:10:17,351 --> 00:10:20,094
I forgot that Kat has her
anniversary dinner tonight,
279
00:10:20,112 --> 00:10:21,595
so I still need a place to crash.
280
00:10:21,614 --> 00:10:23,188
But you can kiss that lingerie goodbye.
281
00:10:23,208 --> 00:10:26,692
You're gonna get my baggiest
sweatpants and tube socks.
282
00:10:26,711 --> 00:10:27,711
Joke's on you!
283
00:10:27,861 --> 00:10:30,254
Because I find the tube
to be the sexiest of socks!
284
00:10:37,780 --> 00:10:39,371
So, what vibe are we going for?
285
00:10:39,707 --> 00:10:40,890
Sexy and sophisticated?
286
00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:42,466
Schoolgirl with an attitude?
287
00:10:42,618 --> 00:10:45,210
Or are we talking full-on dominatrix?
288
00:10:45,454 --> 00:10:49,048
I don't know. My underwear
usually comes in a four-pack.
289
00:10:49,199 --> 00:10:51,625
Well, what do you
think Oscar would like?
290
00:10:51,777 --> 00:10:53,627
No, we are not shopping for Oscar.
291
00:10:53,779 --> 00:10:54,795
We are shopping for you.
292
00:10:54,947 --> 00:10:56,555
What do you like?
293
00:10:56,707 --> 00:10:58,039
Um...
294
00:10:58,059 --> 00:10:59,374
This is cute.
295
00:10:59,468 --> 00:11:02,544
Okay, maybe we should shop
for Oscar a little bit.
296
00:11:02,563 --> 00:11:04,045
Aren't you gonna try anything on?
297
00:11:04,065 --> 00:11:06,214
You know, for your
sneaky link? (CHUCKLES)
298
00:11:06,308 --> 00:11:10,310
Do not use the slang that
I teach you against me.
299
00:11:10,463 --> 00:11:11,887
And he's not getting anything.
300
00:11:11,906 --> 00:11:13,647
He really irked my nerves today.
301
00:11:13,799 --> 00:11:14,815
What happened?
302
00:11:14,909 --> 00:11:16,242
- He found out my middle name.
- (GASPS)
303
00:11:16,469 --> 00:11:18,652
That rat bastard.
304
00:11:18,746 --> 00:11:20,137
I just don't need him knowing
305
00:11:20,230 --> 00:11:21,805
every little detail about my life.
306
00:11:21,824 --> 00:11:23,157
Well, I like when people know
307
00:11:23,309 --> 00:11:24,750
every little detail about my life.
308
00:11:25,009 --> 00:11:26,734
I wish I could wear one
of those medical bracelets,
309
00:11:26,752 --> 00:11:29,920
but, instead of allergies, it
would have fun facts about Kat.
310
00:11:30,014 --> 00:11:31,663
I'd call them Kat Facts.
311
00:11:31,757 --> 00:11:33,682
Well, that's not how I operate.
312
00:11:33,834 --> 00:11:35,425
Knowledge is power,
313
00:11:35,578 --> 00:11:37,911
and I don't want anyone
having power over me.
314
00:11:37,930 --> 00:11:39,355
I mean, first, it's my middle name.
315
00:11:39,506 --> 00:11:40,748
Then it's my blood type.
316
00:11:40,858 --> 00:11:43,417
Next thing you know, I'm
swallowing a balloon of cocaine,
317
00:11:43,435 --> 00:11:46,344
being arrested at the border
and thrown into a Turkish prison.
318
00:11:46,438 --> 00:11:50,199
You have got to stop listening to
Locked Up Abroad before bed.
319
00:11:51,443 --> 00:11:54,111
And no one's gonna take
your power from you.
320
00:11:54,263 --> 00:11:55,871
I mean, you've opened up to me,
321
00:11:56,098 --> 00:11:58,432
and I'm still terrified of you.
322
00:11:58,525 --> 00:12:00,376
Aw, you're sweet.
323
00:12:00,527 --> 00:12:02,044
And, for what it's worth,
324
00:12:02,195 --> 00:12:04,029
I think you can trust Carter.
325
00:12:04,123 --> 00:12:05,196
What?
326
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:07,198
Carter? (CHUCKLES, STAMMERS)
327
00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:09,385
What makes you think it's Carter?
328
00:12:14,374 --> 00:12:16,133
Oh! Hey.
329
00:12:16,227 --> 00:12:18,877
Where'd you sneak off to last night?
330
00:12:18,896 --> 00:12:21,138
Uh, I was... with a guy.
331
00:12:21,232 --> 00:12:24,291
Ah. So that's where you've been going.
332
00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:25,568
What's his name?
333
00:12:25,719 --> 00:12:26,735
Peter...
334
00:12:26,962 --> 00:12:28,821
Backpack.
335
00:12:30,149 --> 00:12:32,241
That is a completely plausible name!
336
00:12:32,468 --> 00:12:34,985
And what does that have
to even do with Carter?
337
00:12:35,079 --> 00:12:37,204
- (KNOCKING)
- Oh, I got it.
338
00:12:40,067 --> 00:12:41,158
Here. You left your earrings.
339
00:12:41,252 --> 00:12:43,827
Thank you, Peter Backpack. Bye!
340
00:12:43,979 --> 00:12:46,905
CARTER: Who the hell is Peter Backpack?!
341
00:12:46,957 --> 00:12:48,649
Okay, fine, it's Carter.
342
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:50,759
I knew it! I wasn't 100% sure,
343
00:12:50,986 --> 00:12:52,820
but now I know it's Carter!
344
00:12:52,838 --> 00:12:54,004
He's a great guy.
345
00:12:54,156 --> 00:12:56,506
Well, yeah, I guess he's okay.
346
00:12:56,659 --> 00:12:59,435
But I'm still not sure if
I should open up to him.
347
00:12:59,586 --> 00:13:02,104
I mean, I've done that before,
and it gets kind of messy.
348
00:13:02,255 --> 00:13:03,939
If you keep worrying
about things getting messy,
349
00:13:04,091 --> 00:13:06,683
you might miss out on
things that are really great.
350
00:13:06,836 --> 00:13:09,778
I mean, does ice cream
end up on my face,
351
00:13:09,930 --> 00:13:13,173
in my hair, down my
cleavage every time I eat it?
352
00:13:13,192 --> 00:13:15,100
Yes. But is it worth it?
353
00:13:15,119 --> 00:13:16,526
You bet.
354
00:13:16,679 --> 00:13:18,679
Okay, I keep telling
you... cup instead of cone.
355
00:13:18,697 --> 00:13:20,105
But...
356
00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:21,272
I hear you.
357
00:13:21,292 --> 00:13:22,292
Now, if you would,
358
00:13:22,293 --> 00:13:23,293
drumroll, please.
359
00:13:23,294 --> 00:13:25,419
Oh.
360
00:13:32,878 --> 00:13:35,712
Randi, I have never felt sexier.
361
00:13:35,865 --> 00:13:36,865
I... (CHUCKLES)
362
00:13:36,957 --> 00:13:37,973
Whoa! Oh!
363
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:39,808
Sorry, ma'am. Oh, geez. I'm good.
364
00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,644
Whoa! I can walk like a woman.
365
00:13:41,795 --> 00:13:43,395
Oh, hey!
366
00:13:44,965 --> 00:13:46,131
Mm-mm.
367
00:13:46,150 --> 00:13:48,192
- (CAMERA CLICKS)
- I'm just gonna hold on to this.
368
00:13:51,322 --> 00:13:53,805
Okay. The table is set,
369
00:13:53,824 --> 00:13:55,306
the champagne is chilling
370
00:13:55,326 --> 00:13:57,642
and I hid everything with googly eyes
371
00:13:57,662 --> 00:14:01,054
so they wouldn't see me slip into this.
372
00:14:01,073 --> 00:14:02,406
Oh, girl.
373
00:14:02,558 --> 00:14:05,751
That's what Mama would call
a one-way ticket to hell.
374
00:14:06,896 --> 00:14:08,820
I am so glad you're getting into this.
375
00:14:08,947 --> 00:14:12,174
I'm a big believer in
celebrating every moment.
376
00:14:12,401 --> 00:14:14,067
A nice sunrise,
377
00:14:14,086 --> 00:14:15,752
a... a perfect pie crust,
378
00:14:15,905 --> 00:14:17,846
a healthy bowel movement.
379
00:14:17,998 --> 00:14:19,515
- Totally.
- (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
380
00:14:19,756 --> 00:14:22,499
Don't act like you can't relate.
381
00:14:22,518 --> 00:14:23,758
(PHONE RINGS)
382
00:14:23,778 --> 00:14:25,519
Oh. It's Oscar.
383
00:14:25,671 --> 00:14:26,671
Hi!
384
00:14:26,763 --> 00:14:27,854
Hey, babe, guess what.
385
00:14:27,948 --> 00:14:29,472
Um, you found five dollars.
386
00:14:29,474 --> 00:14:31,525
You're in jail. Pluto's a planet again.
387
00:14:31,677 --> 00:14:33,360
I love that you actually guess.
388
00:14:33,512 --> 00:14:35,695
No, I'm at a basketball
game in a luxury suite.
389
00:14:35,790 --> 00:14:37,122
My boss couldn't use his tickets,
390
00:14:37,349 --> 00:14:38,532
and Max really wanted to go.
391
00:14:38,684 --> 00:14:40,459
- Oh, Max is there?
-MAX: Hey, Kat!
392
00:14:40,610 --> 00:14:44,371
Oscar is the man. I haven't seen
so many free hot dogs in my life.
393
00:14:44,465 --> 00:14:46,523
So does this mean
you'll be a little late?
394
00:14:47,284 --> 00:14:50,360
Actually, would it be okay if
we pushed dinner to tomorrow?
395
00:14:50,379 --> 00:14:52,287
Oh. Um...
396
00:14:52,306 --> 00:14:54,455
Uh, y-yeah.
397
00:14:54,550 --> 00:14:56,049
Yeah. No big deal.
398
00:14:56,201 --> 00:14:57,384
But keep an eye on Max.
399
00:14:57,478 --> 00:15:00,020
He will eat free food
till he pukes. (CHUCKLES)
400
00:15:00,815 --> 00:15:02,189
He has had six hot dogs.
401
00:15:02,299 --> 00:15:04,274
Seven!
402
00:15:05,878 --> 00:15:07,069
Oh.
403
00:15:08,397 --> 00:15:09,655
Oscar's not coming.
404
00:15:09,882 --> 00:15:12,157
He's at a basketball game with Max.
405
00:15:12,384 --> 00:15:14,051
Oh, no, sweetie.
406
00:15:14,069 --> 00:15:16,328
No, don't worry about it. (MUTTERS)
407
00:15:16,479 --> 00:15:17,996
Don't need these anymore. But I'm fine.
408
00:15:18,148 --> 00:15:19,389
It's totally fine. It's fine.
409
00:15:19,408 --> 00:15:20,408
It's fine, it's fine, it's fine.
410
00:15:20,483 --> 00:15:21,834
- Don't need this anymore.
- No, no!
411
00:15:22,061 --> 00:15:23,560
I know you're upset.
412
00:15:23,579 --> 00:15:26,338
But if you throw any more
of my cooking in the trash,
413
00:15:26,489 --> 00:15:28,298
I'll cut you.
414
00:15:29,954 --> 00:15:31,861
I just feel silly about the whole thing.
415
00:15:32,014 --> 00:15:33,789
I wish I hadn't made
such a big deal out of it.
416
00:15:33,940 --> 00:15:37,108
Well, I think you should have
made a bigger deal out of it.
417
00:15:37,202 --> 00:15:39,352
A rooster who doesn't crow
418
00:15:39,446 --> 00:15:41,279
cannot be mad when folks don't wake up.
419
00:15:41,373 --> 00:15:44,858
Yeah, but what if the rooster's
afraid to-to lose the only hen
420
00:15:44,876 --> 00:15:47,027
who's stayed with her for four months?
421
00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,045
Oh, honey.
422
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:52,140
Have some faith in yourself.
423
00:15:52,292 --> 00:15:55,385
Oscar is lucky to have you.
424
00:15:55,537 --> 00:15:56,627
Thank you.
425
00:15:56,722 --> 00:15:58,538
- Aw.
- (PATTING BACK)
426
00:15:58,557 --> 00:16:02,042
Wait a minute. Why am I not
looking at the top of your head?
427
00:16:02,135 --> 00:16:03,318
Mmm. (CHUCKLES)
428
00:16:03,470 --> 00:16:06,229
I couldn't help myself. (CHUCKLES)
429
00:16:06,323 --> 00:16:08,565
If you're going to hell, honey,
430
00:16:08,659 --> 00:16:10,066
I'm going with you.
431
00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:13,537
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
432
00:16:20,071 --> 00:16:21,213
Hey.
433
00:16:22,332 --> 00:16:24,073
Hey.
434
00:16:24,093 --> 00:16:25,817
I didn't think I'd see you here.
435
00:16:26,578 --> 00:16:29,805
Well, Peter Backpack was busy, so...
436
00:16:31,249 --> 00:16:32,808
Sit down. I'll get us a drink.
437
00:16:35,011 --> 00:16:37,178
Listen...
438
00:16:37,272 --> 00:16:38,421
you were right.
439
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:40,923
You laid out some very clear,
440
00:16:40,943 --> 00:16:42,167
very strict...
441
00:16:42,185 --> 00:16:45,445
some would say
illogical... boundaries...
442
00:16:46,281 --> 00:16:48,523
... and I did not respect them.
443
00:16:48,617 --> 00:16:50,859
That's on me,
444
00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:52,119
and I'm sorry.
445
00:16:52,270 --> 00:16:53,695
I appreciate that.
446
00:16:53,789 --> 00:16:57,082
I know that you were just
trying to get to know me better.
447
00:16:57,775 --> 00:16:59,334
That's all I want.
448
00:17:00,370 --> 00:17:03,613
Then allow me to introduce myself.
449
00:17:03,707 --> 00:17:06,299
My name is Miranda Elizabeth Hamilton.
450
00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:08,301
Elizabeth was my nana's name.
451
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,211
My favorite color is green.
452
00:17:10,305 --> 00:17:11,638
I've never seen Titanic.
453
00:17:11,789 --> 00:17:13,807
Ooh, and automatic toilets freak me out.
454
00:17:13,958 --> 00:17:15,976
I'll tell you when I'm done.
455
00:17:16,127 --> 00:17:17,978
Good to know.
456
00:17:18,205 --> 00:17:19,704
The Titanic thing is troubling,
457
00:17:19,723 --> 00:17:21,481
but my heart will go on.
458
00:17:22,317 --> 00:17:24,776
You'd get that if you'd seen it.
459
00:17:25,988 --> 00:17:28,655
And you asked about my fish tattoo.
460
00:17:28,806 --> 00:17:31,716
I got it to remind me
that when things get tough
461
00:17:31,735 --> 00:17:33,735
to just keep swimming.
462
00:17:33,887 --> 00:17:35,403
Like in Finding Nemo.
463
00:17:35,497 --> 00:17:38,498
- Finding who?
- Have you seen any movies?
464
00:17:39,393 --> 00:17:42,127
Please, keep going.
465
00:17:43,154 --> 00:17:45,672
Okay. Um...
466
00:17:46,824 --> 00:17:49,734
I don't usually talk about this, but...
467
00:17:49,827 --> 00:17:52,345
when I got my tattoo, I was...
468
00:17:52,497 --> 00:17:55,757
really struggling with depression.
469
00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:58,076
Oh, wow.
470
00:17:58,094 --> 00:17:59,561
I would've never guessed.
471
00:18:00,430 --> 00:18:02,606
Yeah, you get good at hiding it.
472
00:18:03,841 --> 00:18:05,583
Are things better now?
473
00:18:05,602 --> 00:18:07,527
Most days.
474
00:18:07,679 --> 00:18:09,345
I mean, I found a great therapist,
475
00:18:09,364 --> 00:18:10,922
the right meds, and...
476
00:18:10,941 --> 00:18:14,201
I finally feel like I
have control over my life.
477
00:18:15,037 --> 00:18:16,828
But now...
478
00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:19,331
Now what?
479
00:18:20,450 --> 00:18:23,543
I'm scared that if I let someone new in
480
00:18:23,695 --> 00:18:25,453
I could lose that.
481
00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:27,547
Randi...
482
00:18:29,276 --> 00:18:32,510
... we can take things
as slow as you want.
483
00:18:33,447 --> 00:18:35,222
I'm not going anywhere.
484
00:18:35,373 --> 00:18:37,098
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
485
00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:39,476
Thanks.
486
00:18:41,972 --> 00:18:43,271
(KISSES)
487
00:18:44,066 --> 00:18:45,640
So, uh,
488
00:18:45,792 --> 00:18:48,050
have you told your therapist about me?
489
00:18:48,144 --> 00:18:50,237
Oh, my goodness.
490
00:18:51,392 --> 00:18:53,392
(DOOR OPENS)
491
00:18:53,412 --> 00:18:56,395
Well, well, well,
492
00:18:56,415 --> 00:18:58,473
if it isn't Mr. Basketball.
493
00:18:58,491 --> 00:19:00,417
Liking the nickname,
494
00:19:00,644 --> 00:19:01,918
worried about the tone.
495
00:19:02,145 --> 00:19:04,069
Are you mad?
496
00:19:04,164 --> 00:19:06,256
I was. This helped.
497
00:19:06,407 --> 00:19:07,424
Phil helped.
498
00:19:07,575 --> 00:19:09,000
We actually had a lovely night.
499
00:19:09,094 --> 00:19:10,910
We ate dinner, we sang songs,
500
00:19:10,929 --> 00:19:12,095
we crowed like roosters.
501
00:19:12,322 --> 00:19:14,839
If you're hungry, there's
popovers in the trash.
502
00:19:16,009 --> 00:19:19,494
S-Starting to think tonight was
a bigger deal than you let on.
503
00:19:19,512 --> 00:19:21,996
Well, first it wasn't. Then it was.
504
00:19:22,015 --> 00:19:25,500
Well, maybe it always was
and I just said it wasn't.
505
00:19:25,518 --> 00:19:27,777
I don't know. Cock-a-doodle-doo.
506
00:19:28,947 --> 00:19:30,763
Anyway... (SIGHS)
507
00:19:30,782 --> 00:19:34,284
this is the longest
relationship I've ever had,
508
00:19:34,435 --> 00:19:36,101
and I planned this big,
509
00:19:36,121 --> 00:19:39,197
fancy romantic dinner to celebrate it.
510
00:19:39,349 --> 00:19:40,349
But, instead,
511
00:19:40,350 --> 00:19:41,365
Phil tried on all my shoes
512
00:19:41,518 --> 00:19:43,518
and I ate three pieces of cake.
513
00:19:44,370 --> 00:19:46,688
Kat, you got to tell me
when things are important.
514
00:19:46,781 --> 00:19:48,372
I was afraid of scaring you away.
515
00:19:48,467 --> 00:19:50,858
You know? I have a tendency
to come on a little strong.
516
00:19:50,952 --> 00:19:52,785
Oh, you come on very strong.
517
00:19:52,879 --> 00:19:54,787
It's one of the things
I like most about you.
518
00:19:54,806 --> 00:19:56,714
- That and your laugh.
- (CHUCKLES)
519
00:19:56,866 --> 00:19:59,392
And when you break into
spontaneous tap dancing.
520
00:20:00,220 --> 00:20:01,728
Suck it, Ben.
521
00:20:02,463 --> 00:20:03,721
I'm sorry I wasn't here,
522
00:20:03,815 --> 00:20:06,224
and I promise not to miss
our five-month anniversary.
523
00:20:06,985 --> 00:20:10,044
I'll save the lingerie I
bought for then. (CHUCKLES)
524
00:20:10,063 --> 00:20:11,637
Wait, there's lingerie?
525
00:20:11,731 --> 00:20:13,564
Real lingerie? Not just flannel?
526
00:20:13,717 --> 00:20:15,658
Yeah, it goes with the heels.
527
00:20:15,810 --> 00:20:18,720
I thought you said you
couldn't walk in heels!
528
00:20:18,738 --> 00:20:21,247
Oh. I found a work-around.
529
00:20:23,985 --> 00:20:24,985
This is sexy, right?
530
00:20:31,067 --> 00:20:33,659
There you are! I have
the whole day planned out.
531
00:20:33,845 --> 00:20:35,327
I'm gonna teach you
how to fly this kite,
532
00:20:35,347 --> 00:20:37,255
we'll have a picnic,
then we can ride our bikes
533
00:20:37,407 --> 00:20:38,422
to get snow cones.
534
00:20:38,575 --> 00:20:40,499
That sounds amazing! (CHUCKLES)
535
00:20:40,593 --> 00:20:42,644
(MOUTHS): Rain check?
536
00:20:43,688 --> 00:20:45,671
Oh, my God.
537
00:20:45,723 --> 00:20:48,173
Guess who I just saw
making out by the dumpsters.
538
00:20:48,193 --> 00:20:49,359
Uh, Lady and the Tramp.
539
00:20:49,510 --> 00:20:50,510
Two raccoons.
540
00:20:50,587 --> 00:20:51,602
George and Amal Clooney.
541
00:20:51,696 --> 00:20:53,530
They travel a lot. It's possible.
542
00:20:53,681 --> 00:20:56,090
I love that you always guess.
543
00:20:56,109 --> 00:20:57,441
Randi and Carter!
544
00:20:57,536 --> 00:20:59,093
- What?!
- You're kidding!
545
00:20:59,112 --> 00:21:00,352
Those rascals!
546
00:21:00,446 --> 00:21:01,871
Why didn't anybody tell me?
547
00:21:02,023 --> 00:21:03,614
Because you can't keep a secret.
548
00:21:03,708 --> 00:21:04,958
Yes, I can.
549
00:21:06,527 --> 00:21:08,527
I got to call Sheila.
550
00:21:08,547 --> 00:21:10,755
♪ ♪
551
00:21:12,717 --> 00:21:14,199
♪ Yo ♪
552
00:21:14,219 --> 00:21:15,777
♪ Let's go ♪
553
00:21:15,870 --> 00:21:18,296
- ♪ Come on, listen up, baby ♪
- ♪ Ooh ♪
554
00:21:18,448 --> 00:21:20,114
♪ If you want to be free ♪
555
00:21:20,133 --> 00:21:23,726
- ♪ If you want to be free ♪
- ♪ Got to let it go now ♪
556
00:21:23,878 --> 00:21:25,728
♪ Come on, let's take a ride with me ♪
557
00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:27,713
- ♪ Take a ride with me ♪
- ♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
558
00:21:27,732 --> 00:21:30,124
♪ I want to make you feel good ♪
559
00:21:30,217 --> 00:21:31,793
♪ Want you to lose your blues ♪
560
00:21:31,811 --> 00:21:33,069
♪ Want you to lose your blues... ♪
561
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:39,000
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
39722
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