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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,350 --> 00:00:06,049 [ Whinnying ] WHOA, WILBUR, HERE I GO! [ Laughs ] 2 00:00:06,093 --> 00:00:07,833 I'M RUNNING PRETTY GOOD NOW, AND I'M GONNA TAKE A 3 00:00:07,877 --> 00:00:11,054 JUMP, AND... OH, I GOT WINGS, AND I'M FLYING! OH! 4 00:00:11,098 --> 00:00:13,926 TRI-STAR PICTURES, WHERE ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN. 5 00:00:24,285 --> 00:00:29,551 ♪ COME WITH ME MY LOVE TO THE SEA 6 00:00:29,594 --> 00:00:32,467 ♪ [ Woman Singing Along ] TO... TO THE SEA THE SEA OF LOVE 7 00:00:32,510 --> 00:00:39,039 ♪ OH I WANT TO TELL YOU HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU 8 00:00:41,606 --> 00:00:44,479 ♪ [ Woman, Harmonizing ] LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU, I DO 9 00:00:44,522 --> 00:00:47,351 ♪ BOM, BOM, BOM DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE MET 10 00:00:52,139 --> 00:00:57,666 ♪ THAT'S THE DAY I KNEW YOU WERE MY PET I WANT TO TELL YOU 11 00:01:00,277 --> 00:01:03,367 ♪ HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU [ Woman ] I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU 12 00:01:07,415 --> 00:01:10,374 ♪ BOM-BOM-BOM-BOM COME WITH ME 13 00:01:14,509 --> 00:01:18,904 ♪ OOOH, WITH ME. TO THE SEA [ Woman Giggles ] 14 00:01:20,210 --> 00:01:23,344 ♪ OF LOVE [ Woman Sighs ] MMM. ♪ 15 00:01:27,435 --> 00:01:29,785 IS YOUR DIAPHRAGM IN? MM-HMM. MMM. 16 00:01:35,443 --> 00:01:41,144 OKAY. NOW, LET ME SEE IF I GOT THIS STRAIGHT. UH, SANTA CLAUS IS REAL, 17 00:01:41,188 --> 00:01:46,584 BUT GHOSTS AREN'T REAL. COWBOYS ARE REAL, BUT, UM, 18 00:01:46,628 --> 00:01:51,459 WITCHES AREN'T REAL. DINOSAURS AREN'T REAL, AND MONSTERS USED TO BE 19 00:01:51,502 --> 00:01:54,026 REAL. OR WAS IT THE OTHER WAY AROUND? 20 00:01:54,070 --> 00:01:56,246 I GOTTA LISTEN A LITTLE BIT MORE. I MEAN, JUST BECAUSE 21 00:01:56,290 --> 00:02:00,294 IT'S DARK DOESN'T MEAN MONSTERS ARE COMIN' OUT. THESE ARE JUST MY TOYS... 22 00:02:00,337 --> 00:02:04,776 THE SAME TOYS THAT... I'M SURE THAT'S...I DON'T 23 00:02:04,820 --> 00:02:07,518 REMEMBER IT HAVING BATTERIES, BUT I'M SURE THAT'S FINE. 24 00:02:07,562 --> 00:02:12,175 I'M SURE THAT THERE'S A... OH... OH MY GOD! 25 00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:15,439 MONSTERS! [ Roaring, Laughing ] THERE'S MONSTERS IN MY 26 00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:18,703 ROOM! MAYBE I SHOULD GET UNDER THE COVERS NOW. 27 00:02:18,747 --> 00:02:21,445 YEAH. I'LL JUST... [ Roars, Laughs ] -[Growls] 28 00:02:37,679 --> 00:02:40,595 -[Screams] I HAVE TO GET THAT. NO, HE WON'T STOP. 29 00:02:40,638 --> 00:02:43,946 HE'LL STOP. ALL RIGHT. -HELP! MONSTERS! -I'LL DO IT, OKAY? 30 00:02:43,989 --> 00:02:48,646 OKAY. NO, NO. NO, DON'T READ YOUR ACCOUNTING 31 00:02:48,690 --> 00:02:50,779 -MAGAZINES. -WHY NOT? -'CAUSE IT GETS YOU 32 00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:54,217 -OUT OF THE MOOD. -MONSTERS! MONSTERS! -OKAY? ALL RIGHT. 33 00:02:54,261 --> 00:02:56,176 OKAY. YOU BEHAVE. 34 00:02:57,394 --> 00:02:59,222 OKAY, MIKE. I'M COMIN'. 35 00:02:59,266 --> 00:03:02,007 -MONSTERS! -MONSTERS? WHERE? 36 00:03:02,051 --> 00:03:04,923 THERE'S NO MONSTERS. LOOK, SEE? DO YOU SEE ANY MONSTERS? 37 00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:07,056 WELL, YEAH. 38 00:03:07,099 --> 00:03:09,232 I THINK IT WAS POPEYE. YEAH, HE WAS THE ONE WHO DID IT. 39 00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:11,539 [Imitating Popeye] WHY, OF ALL THE THINGS... I'LL TAKE THAT GUMBY, 40 00:03:11,582 --> 00:03:12,931 AND I'LL KNOCK HIM FROM HERE TO KINGDOM COME, 41 00:03:12,975 --> 00:03:16,021 -I TELL YA. [ Chuckling ] -I THINK MY DADDY LIKES 42 00:03:16,065 --> 00:03:20,504 -THESE TOYS MORE THAN I DO. -WHO ELSE? PEE-WEE? 43 00:03:20,548 --> 00:03:23,333 NO. [ Imitates Pee-Wee ] HA. HA-HA-HA. HA. 44 00:03:23,377 --> 00:03:25,857 I WONDER IF HE'S GONNA DO THE FLYIN' TURD GAG NOW. 45 00:03:25,901 --> 00:03:31,559 WATCH OUT, MIKEY, IT'S A FLYIN' TURD. OW! 46 00:03:31,602 --> 00:03:36,738 -GOOD NIGHT, HONEY. YOU'RE SO CRAZY. -I'LL JUST TUCK MYSELF IN. 47 00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:39,610 -IS THAT GOOD? -WHY DID I CALL YOU IN HERE? 48 00:03:39,654 --> 00:03:43,919 [ Snoring ] AW, COME ON, MOLLIE. 49 00:03:43,962 --> 00:03:46,617 I TOLD YOU NOT TO READ THIS. NOW, GET UP. 50 00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:50,534 -COME ON. GET UP, HONEY. -OH, I CAN'T. -WHY? OH, COME ON. 51 00:03:50,578 --> 00:03:52,144 I JUST GOT HIM TO GO TO SLEEP. 52 00:03:52,188 --> 00:03:54,712 WE NEVER GET TO DO IT ANYMORE. PLEASE. 53 00:03:54,756 --> 00:03:58,194 PLEASE GET UP, HONEY. [ Groans ] I'M SLEEPING. 54 00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,849 I KNOW. YOU WOULDN'T HAVE ANY FUN DOING IT 55 00:04:00,892 --> 00:04:03,199 -WITH ME WHEN I'M SLEEPING. -WELL, IT'S NEVER 56 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:09,249 -STOPPED US BEFORE. [ Laughs ] -OH. MMM. 57 00:04:15,385 --> 00:04:20,477 OH, COME ON. OUTTA MY WAY, MAN! THIS AIN'T NO WET DREAM. 58 00:04:25,003 --> 00:04:26,353 [Shouting, Clamoring Continue] 59 00:04:29,225 --> 00:04:34,056 HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON? AM I HEARING THINGS? YOO-HOO, IS SOMEBODY 60 00:04:34,099 --> 00:04:35,579 THERE? 61 00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:44,458 [Clamoring, Whooping Continue] 62 00:04:50,551 --> 00:04:53,336 GET OUTTA MY WAY! I KNOW WHERE I'M GOIN', MAN. 63 00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:56,470 BRIGHT IDEA. NOW WE'RE LOST. 64 00:04:56,513 --> 00:05:01,257 WHY? I BEEN HERE BEFORE, THAT'S WHY. 65 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:05,348 WHO IS IT? WHO IS IT? WHAT DO YOU WANT? GO AWAY! OOH. 66 00:05:05,392 --> 00:05:09,483 TAIL, DON'T FAIL ME NOW. WE ARE THE GUYS. WE ARE THE WINNERS. 67 00:05:09,526 --> 00:05:11,572 I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN. I THINK I CAN. 68 00:05:11,615 --> 00:05:13,487 THERE WE ARE. COME ON, GUYS. LET'S GO. [ Panting ] 69 00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:17,142 WE'RE IN. WE'RE IN. WE'RE DOIN' IT. WE ARE. LET'S GO. KEEP GOIN'. 70 00:05:17,186 --> 00:05:21,712 KEEP MOVIN'. COME ON. COME ON. KEEP MOVIN' GUYS, PLEASE. 71 00:05:21,756 --> 00:05:24,541 I DON'T THINK I CAN. I DON'T THINK I CAN. HELP ME OUT, BUDDY. 72 00:05:24,585 --> 00:05:27,501 AS LONG AS ONE OF US MAKES IT. COME ON, BUDDY, 73 00:05:27,544 --> 00:05:31,287 OH, NO. OH, NO, OH, NO. IT'S THE TADPOLE SQUAD! 74 00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:35,030 EW. EW! [ Shouting, Clamoring ] [ Despairing Cries ] 75 00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:47,912 YOU CAN'T BULLY ME! YOU CAN'T 76 00:05:47,956 --> 00:05:50,306 GET THROUGH THIS DIAPHRAGM! 77 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,440 ♪ NEENER-NEENER-NEENER HEY, GUYS, I FOUND A WAY THROUGH! ♪ 78 00:05:53,483 --> 00:05:56,051 OVER HERE BY THE RIM! YES! 79 00:05:59,097 --> 00:06:02,797 HEY, BUSTER, HOW'D YOU GET IN HERE? THIS IS MY WOMB. GET OUTTA HERE! SHOO! 80 00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:05,713 SHOO! HERE WE GO. YOU KNOW WHY I'M HERE. 81 00:06:05,756 --> 00:06:07,584 NO! DON'T! STOP THAT! COME ON, GIVE IT UP. 82 00:06:07,628 --> 00:06:09,934 GIVE IT UP! STOP DOING THAT! OW! EEE! 83 00:06:09,978 --> 00:06:11,762 LET ME IN, BABY. LET ME IN. [ Continues Protesting ] 84 00:06:11,806 --> 00:06:14,678 COME ON, MAMA. COME ON, HOT MAMA. YOU'RE A HOT MAMA. 85 00:06:14,722 --> 00:06:17,420 -[ Both Squealing ] [ Sperm ] OW! HOT MAMA! 86 00:06:17,464 --> 00:06:22,251 YES! YES! OOOH! [ Sperm Hooting ] 87 00:06:30,868 --> 00:06:33,131 [ Egg Wailing ] WELL, HERE I AM... 88 00:06:33,175 --> 00:06:35,438 ALL CONCEIVED AND NOWHERE TO GO. 89 00:06:42,140 --> 00:06:45,317 AH YOU MISSED! GO WIDE! 90 00:06:45,361 --> 00:06:49,887 LOOK OUT! OOH! [ Laughs ] HI, HONEY. 91 00:06:49,931 --> 00:06:56,546 HI. HI, HONEY. HI, HONEY. 92 00:06:56,590 --> 00:07:00,985 WHAT'D YOU GET FOR ME? THIS ISN'T FOR YOU. THIS IS FOR YOU. 93 00:07:01,029 --> 00:07:05,207 -IT IS A--LA-DA! -DON'T YOU THINK HE'S A LITTLE YOUNG FOR THAT? 94 00:07:05,250 --> 00:07:08,253 A LITTLE YOUNG? THAT HAT'S NEVER GONNA FIT ME! 95 00:07:08,297 --> 00:07:10,473 -ALL RIGHT. YOU TELL 'IM. -I'M NOT TELLING HIM 96 00:07:10,517 --> 00:07:12,780 ABOUT IT. YOU'RE THE GUY. FORGET IT! 97 00:07:12,823 --> 00:07:18,089 -NO, WHEN WE HAVE A GIRL, I WILL EXPLAIN IT TO HER. -OH, BROTHER. 98 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:22,877 ALL RIGHT. HERE GOES. MIKE, THIS IS A POTTY, OKAY? 99 00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:26,402 -NOW, WHEN YOU WANNA TAKE A PISS, YOU DO IT... -DON'T SAY "PISS." 100 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,230 ALL RIGHT. WHEN YOU WANNA TAKE A WHIZ... 101 00:07:28,273 --> 00:07:30,972 -NO. -WHAT? "SEE A MAN ABOUT A HORSE" 102 00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:32,147 "DRAIN THE SNAKE"? WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO 103 00:07:32,190 --> 00:07:34,758 -SAY? -"PEE-PEE." -PEE-PEE'S SUCH A WIMP 104 00:07:34,802 --> 00:07:37,544 -WORD. I DON'T... -NO, PEE-PEE IS EASY TO SAY. 105 00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:39,633 ALL RIGHT, WHEN YOU WANNA TAKE A PEE-PEE, OKAY, 106 00:07:39,676 --> 00:07:43,332 YOU DO IT IN HERE. YOU JUST DO THIS. JUST TAKE IT OUT, OKAY? 107 00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:47,858 -OH, COME ON. -WHAT? -DAD, WHO'S KIDDIN' WHO, HUH? 108 00:07:47,902 --> 00:07:50,295 AND, THE SAME TOKEN, WHEN YOU WANNA TAKE A 109 00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:53,081 -DUMP. -POO-POO. -THIS IS A JOKE, RIGHT? 110 00:07:53,124 --> 00:07:55,170 -I KNOW IT SOUNDS DISGUSTING, MIKE, 111 00:07:55,213 --> 00:07:58,173 BUT, YOU KNOW, YOU GOTTA TRUST ME ON THIS, OKAY? 112 00:07:58,216 --> 00:08:00,001 LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT: YOU WANT ME TO TAKE A 113 00:08:00,044 --> 00:08:02,830 -DUMP OUTSIDE MY DIAPER? -HE DOESN'T LIKE IT. 114 00:08:02,873 --> 00:08:05,397 -HE DOES TOO. -HE DOESN'T LIKE IT. -WE JUST HAVE TO MAKE IT 115 00:08:05,441 --> 00:08:07,443 FUN FOR HIM. 116 00:08:09,010 --> 00:08:12,404 ♪ COME ALONG AND BE MY POTTY BOY 117 00:08:12,448 --> 00:08:16,191 ♪ COME ALONG AND BE MY POTTY BOY -IS THIS REALLY AN 118 00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:18,541 ♪ -APPROPRIATE SUBJECT FOR A MUSICAL? [ Continues ] 119 00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:22,676 ♪ AND YOU CAN POTTY TOO YES, YOU MY GIRL LIKES TO 120 00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:28,856 ♪ POTTY ALL THE TIME POTTY ALL THE TIME YOU GOT TO FIGHT 121 00:08:28,899 --> 00:08:33,904 ♪ FOR YOUR RIGHT MMM TO POTTY 122 00:08:33,948 --> 00:08:40,476 ♪ YOU GOT TO FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO POTTY ♪ 123 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,566 -HE DOESN'T LIKE IT. -HE LIKES IT. -HEY, I DON'T CARE 124 00:08:43,610 --> 00:08:45,873 WHAT THEY SAY. I AIN'T POOPIN' IN THAT THING. 125 00:08:45,916 --> 00:08:50,530 I GOT MY STANDARDS. 126 00:08:50,573 --> 00:08:51,792 IT'S YOUR KEYS! 127 00:08:51,835 --> 00:08:56,536 TOSS 'EM! YO, THANKS, BABE. WHEW. 128 00:08:56,579 --> 00:09:01,802 YOU WERE REALLY LUCKY WITH THOSE KEYS, I'LL TELL YA. 129 00:09:01,845 --> 00:09:04,326 I WAS STARTING TO THINK I COULD REALLY LOVE BRAD, 130 00:09:04,369 --> 00:09:07,503 THEN I NOTICED THIS FACE HE MADE, KIND OF LIKE-- 131 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,113 LIKE, IF I SAID, "WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?" 132 00:09:09,157 --> 00:09:11,725 THERE'D BE THIS FACE. YOU KNOW? OR, "HOW'D YOU LIKE 133 00:09:11,768 --> 00:09:14,684 "THAT MOVIE?" IT'S JUST THIS FACE THAT SAYS, "I DON'T KNOW. 134 00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:17,948 WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?" AND THEN I HAD THIS FLASH FORWARD OF HAVING KIDS 135 00:09:17,992 --> 00:09:20,211 AND THE KIDS MAKING THAT FACE. 136 00:09:20,255 --> 00:09:23,345 -AND THEN I KNEW IT WAS OVER. -YOU ARE DERANGED. 137 00:09:23,388 --> 00:09:27,915 YOU KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU? OH! OH, YOU KNOW WHAT? 138 00:09:27,958 --> 00:09:30,352 IF YOU WANT A BOY, YOU EAT MORE SODIUM-RICH FOOD. 139 00:09:30,395 --> 00:09:33,181 IF YOU WANT A GIRL, YOU EAT MORE DAIRY. REALLY? WHO SAYS? 140 00:09:33,224 --> 00:09:35,705 I READ IT. WHERE? HARVARD MEDICAL JOURNAL 141 00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:38,969 OR THE NATIONAL ENQUIRER? I THINK THE STAR. 142 00:09:39,013 --> 00:09:42,059 IF YOU HAVE A PREFERENCE YOU'D BETTER ACT NOW. THOSE SEX ORGANS ARE 143 00:09:42,103 --> 00:09:43,321 FORMING SOON. 144 00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:46,411 LET'S SEE. TWO ARMS, TWO LEGS... 145 00:09:46,455 --> 00:09:50,285 AND TWO MOUTHS? [ Mollie ] "D," AND WHAT COMES UP? 146 00:09:50,328 --> 00:09:53,201 DOG. -YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. I KNOW ALL ABOUT 147 00:09:53,244 --> 00:09:55,856 COMPUTERS. -HOW 'BOUT THAT ONE? SCOOT OVER, GIRLS. I GOT A LOT 148 00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:59,163 OF WORK TO DO HERE. LET'S SEE. I'LL JUST TRY... 149 00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:00,643 THIS ONE. [ Keys Clicking ] 150 00:10:00,687 --> 00:10:04,647 AND LET'S SEE, WHAT DO WE GET? A JAR! BEAUTIFUL. 151 00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:07,650 I'M PRETTY GOOD AT THIS. MAYBE I OUGHT TO GET A JOB HERE. 152 00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:10,740 [ Man ] WHAT ARE YOU GIRLS UP TO? 153 00:10:10,784 --> 00:10:12,916 [ All ] NOTHING. -WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE? I DON'T KNOW WHY-- 154 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:15,092 -WHOA. SO THIS IS HOW GROWNUPS 155 00:10:15,136 --> 00:10:18,008 -GET SO TALL. -WE WERE JUST, UH, FINISHING UP 156 00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:21,925 -THE, UH, MARGOLIS ACCOUNT HERE. -THE MARGOLIS ACCOUNT, HUH? 157 00:10:21,969 --> 00:10:24,406 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO-- SEND MARGOLIS A 158 00:10:24,449 --> 00:10:26,364 -SPREADSHEET WITH PICTURES? -[ Laughing ] NO. -TICKLE, TICKLE, TICKLE. 159 00:10:26,408 --> 00:10:29,106 I THINK SOMETHING FUNNY IS GOING ON HERE, AND I-- 160 00:10:29,150 --> 00:10:31,979 -WHAT'S THAT? -WHAT'S UP, MY MAN? 161 00:10:32,022 --> 00:10:36,548 IT LOOKS LIKE A KID. "IT LOOKS LIKE A KID." I CAN SEE IT'S A KID! 162 00:10:36,592 --> 00:10:39,290 WHAT IS A KID DOING IN HERE? THIS IS NOT A NURSERY SCHOOL. 163 00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:41,771 MR. RUSSELL, LET ME EXPLAIN. IT WAS AN 164 00:10:41,815 --> 00:10:44,121 -EMERGENCY SITUATION. -OH, IT WAS AN EMERGENCY. I SEE. I SEE WHAT YOU'RE 165 00:10:44,165 --> 00:10:47,516 UP TO. YOU THINK THAT BECAUSE YOU HAVE A SON 166 00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:50,345 AND YOU'RE PREGNANT, YOU DESERVE SPECIAL CONSIDERATION. 167 00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:51,955 OH, NO, I WOULD NEVER ASK FOR SPECIAL 168 00:10:51,999 --> 00:10:54,392 -CONSIDERATION. -LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING. 169 00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:57,134 ACCOUNTANCY IS FILLED WITH HARDSHIP. 170 00:10:57,178 --> 00:10:59,397 IT'S NOTHING BUT SACRIFICE. 171 00:10:59,441 --> 00:11:02,139 IF YOU WANTED SOMETHING EASY, WHY DON'T YOU BECOME A DENTAL HYGIENIST OR 172 00:11:02,183 --> 00:11:05,795 A CAR-RENTAL PERSON? YOU KNOW, WHEN I HAD A BLEEDING ULCER, AND 173 00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:07,623 I CAME OUT OF THE ANESTHETIC-- 174 00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:10,191 [Russell Continues Indistinct] SOMEBODY'S LOUD AND OPINIONATED. 175 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:14,151 -OY! -"WHERE'S MY ADDING 176 00:11:14,195 --> 00:11:17,720 MACHINE? "WHERE'S MY CALCULATOR?" THAT'S WHAT I SAID! 177 00:11:17,764 --> 00:11:20,288 AND LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ELSE, YOUNG LADY, HUH? 178 00:11:20,331 --> 00:11:23,421 ♪ -HEY, I HAVE A KID. LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA HERE, SHOES. HAVE A DRINK. 179 00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:26,337 ♪ LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA [ Continues, Indistinct ] ♪ 180 00:11:26,381 --> 00:11:31,081 YOU MESS WITH MY MOTHER, YOU MESS WITH ME. 181 00:11:31,125 --> 00:11:33,301 [MOLLIE] MIKEY, DRINKS ARE FOR DRINKING, TOYS ARE FOR PLAYING. 182 00:11:36,783 --> 00:11:39,742 SO, HOW DID YOU ARRIVE AT THIS FIGURE FOR YOUR TIPS? 183 00:11:39,786 --> 00:11:44,051 -I GUESSED. -YOU KEPT TRACK FOR A PERIOD OF TIME 184 00:11:44,094 --> 00:11:46,009 -AND DID A PROJECTED ESTIMATE. -UH-UH. 185 00:11:46,053 --> 00:11:51,885 -I MADE IT UP. -YOU MADE IT UP? -MM-HMM. 186 00:11:51,928 --> 00:11:58,152 NOW, AS A FLIGHT INSTRUCTOR, YOU EARED $9,212? 187 00:11:58,195 --> 00:12:01,329 REALLY? HEY, THAT'S PRETTY GOOD. 188 00:12:01,372 --> 00:12:04,462 -YOU REALIZE... THAT THAT'S ONLY-- -177. 189 00:12:04,506 --> 00:12:09,641 -$177 DOLLARS A WEEK. -IT'S NOT MY MAIN JOB. -YOU SEEM TO SPEND 190 00:12:09,685 --> 00:12:12,166 -MOST OF YOUR TIME DOING IT. -MA, KNOCK IT OFF. -YOU HEARD HIM SAY IT'S NOT 191 00:12:12,209 --> 00:12:13,994 HIS MAIN JOB. CUT HIM SOME SLACK. 192 00:12:14,037 --> 00:12:16,039 WELL, SINCE I'VE BEEN MARRIED, I HAVEN'T HAD AN 193 00:12:16,083 --> 00:12:18,476 OPPORTUNITY TO FLY. AT THE RATE I'M GOING, I'LL NEVER WORK FOR AN AIRLINE. 194 00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,609 AT THIS RATE, THERE'S ALOT OF THINGS YOU WON'T BE DOING. 195 00:12:20,652 --> 00:12:22,785 UNLIKE YOUR SON, STUART... 196 00:12:22,829 --> 00:12:25,788 WHO'S GOT A PLETHORA OF OPPORTUNITIES, A REGULAR GENIUS. 197 00:12:25,832 --> 00:12:29,444 [ All Arguing At Once ] WE'RE TALKING ABOUT YOU AND 198 00:12:29,487 --> 00:12:33,840 -MOLLIE AND YOUR INCOME TAX. -EVERY TWO WEEKS HE CALLS MOLLIE FOR MONEY. 199 00:12:33,883 --> 00:12:35,493 DON'T WORRY ABOUT STUART. HE'LL BE ALL RIGHT 200 00:12:35,537 --> 00:12:36,930 AS SOON AS HE SETTLES DOWN. 201 00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:39,671 HE HAS A DEGREE IN ACCOUNTING... WHICH IS LIKE MONEY IN 202 00:12:39,715 --> 00:12:41,151 THE BANK, SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT. 203 00:12:44,111 --> 00:12:46,548 MIKE, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO OUT AND GET SOME CARVEL? 204 00:12:46,591 --> 00:12:48,811 I'VE GOT THE TIME, IF YOU GOT THE DIAPERS. 205 00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:50,378 COME ON, BUDDY. COME ON. 206 00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:53,947 [ Whispering ] I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THAT. 207 00:12:53,990 --> 00:12:55,992 WHAT? WHAT DID I SAY? MA, YOU ARE FOREVER 208 00:12:56,036 --> 00:12:59,256 -ON HIS CASE. -HE'S A SLOB. HE'S BELLIGERENT. 209 00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:02,129 HE HAS THE EARNING CAPACITY OF AN ILLITERATE 210 00:13:02,172 --> 00:13:04,174 IMMIGRANT. BUT I'M NOT GONNA SAY ANYTHING 211 00:13:04,218 --> 00:13:06,133 IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT. THAT'S WHAT I WANT. 212 00:13:06,176 --> 00:13:07,308 THAT'S WHAT I WANT. 213 00:13:10,659 --> 00:13:13,314 THAT'S YOUR BABY SISTER, JULIE, IN THERE. 214 00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:15,011 SHE'S KICKING! NOW, WAIT A MINUTE. 215 00:13:15,055 --> 00:13:18,232 LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. MY SISTER IS IN MY JUICE CUP? 216 00:13:18,275 --> 00:13:23,367 YOU WANNA FEEL IT? HERE. GIMME YOUR HAND. 217 00:13:23,411 --> 00:13:29,504 -OH, IN THERE. WHOA! -DON'T YOU JUST HATE IT WHEN YOU GET YOUR HEAD 218 00:13:29,547 --> 00:13:32,333 -CAUGHT IN YOUR PLACENTA? -I KNOW, LET'S PLAY HER 219 00:13:32,376 --> 00:13:35,989 A LITTLE SONG, MOM. THIS WAS ALWAYS GOOD FOR ME. 220 00:13:38,295 --> 00:13:39,731 ♪ [ Plays Lullaby ] 221 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:43,605 AW. OH, NOW I'LL NEVER GET 222 00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:46,347 THAT TUNE OUTTA MY HEAD. 223 00:13:48,653 --> 00:13:49,393 [ Snoring ] 224 00:13:51,047 --> 00:13:52,875 WHEN I HAVE 225 00:13:52,919 --> 00:13:54,964 THIS NEW BABY GIRL, I'M GONNA NEED YOUR HELP. OKAY? 226 00:13:55,008 --> 00:13:58,925 AND YOU KNOW WHY? OKAY. TELL ME. BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA BE 227 00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:03,625 JULIE'S BIG BROTHER. ALL RIGHT! LAY ONE ON ME! 228 00:14:03,668 --> 00:14:06,584 NIGHT-NIGHT, HONEY. NIGHT-NIGHT. REMEMBER, YOU'RE GONNA BE 229 00:14:06,628 --> 00:14:08,848 HER BIG BROTHER. I'M GONNA BE A BIG BROTHER. 230 00:14:08,891 --> 00:14:10,327 I'M GONNA BE A BIG BROTHER. 231 00:14:26,169 --> 00:14:28,084 OKAY, THAT FEELS PRETTY GOOD. 232 00:14:28,128 --> 00:14:30,260 HERE WE GO, IN THE-- 233 00:14:30,304 --> 00:14:33,220 OOP! NOT IN THE NOSE. OKAY, BOTTOMS UP. 234 00:14:42,142 --> 00:14:43,360 DO YOU BELIEVE WHAT THEY'RE 235 00:14:43,404 --> 00:14:45,623 ASKIN' FOR TEDDY BEARS? I'M TELLIN' YA, IT'S A 236 00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:49,671 CRIME. WELL, I THINK WE GOT EVERYTHING: 237 00:14:49,714 --> 00:14:51,716 TEDDY BEAR, TEETHING RINGS, 238 00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:54,719 P.J. SPARKLES. YES, I'LL KISS YOU. 239 00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:00,682 HERE YA GO, ACE. KEEP THE CHANGE. 240 00:15:02,336 --> 00:15:04,686 ALL RIGHT, BABY, HERE WE GO. GUM THIS DOWN. 241 00:15:04,729 --> 00:15:06,601 NO, THERE'S NO SALT ON IT. 242 00:15:15,305 --> 00:15:18,961 HEY! HEY, PUNK! GET YOUR OWN TOY! 243 00:15:19,005 --> 00:15:22,965 ALL RIGHT. THAT'S IT. GIVE--YOU GIVE-- I'LL RIP YOUR LUNGS OUT! 244 00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:25,837 GIVE IT TO ME! HEY, WHAT ARE YOU SMILIN' AT? 245 00:15:25,881 --> 00:15:28,928 I GUESS YOU NEVER MESSED WITH ANYBODY'S BIG BROTHER BEFORE, HUH? 246 00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:32,366 GIMME IT! OH. THERE YA GO. TAKE THAT. 247 00:15:32,409 --> 00:15:34,977 HERE YA GO, BABY. YEAH, YOU CAN PUT IT BACK IN YOUR MOUTH. 248 00:15:35,021 --> 00:15:39,242 MMM, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. I'LL NEVER LET ANYBODY HURT YOU. 249 00:15:43,855 --> 00:15:45,683 OH, WOW. 250 00:15:45,727 --> 00:15:48,164 LOOKS LIKE I GOT MY WORK CUT OUT FOR ME. 251 00:15:48,208 --> 00:15:51,254 WHAT DID I TELL YOU? LOOK AT THIS MESS YOU'VE GOTTEN US INTO. 252 00:15:51,298 --> 00:15:54,736 YOU SEE, I TOLD YOU TO TAKE 48th. YOU SHOULD HAVE TAKEN 48th! 253 00:15:54,779 --> 00:15:57,608 -48th IS JUST AS BAD. -HEY, LOOK, TAKE A QUICK LEFT. 254 00:15:57,652 --> 00:16:00,698 -WE'LL SHOOT OVER TO 46th. -POOR DADDY--HANGIN' OUT 255 00:16:00,742 --> 00:16:04,093 -WITH BUTTHOLES ALL DAY LONG. -46th! AH, YOU DIDN'T TAKE THE LEFT! 256 00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:05,660 DAD, YOU WANNA THINK ABOUT GETTIN' SOME TOYS IN 257 00:16:05,703 --> 00:16:10,143 HERE? I MEAN, IT'S LONELY IN THE FRONT SEAT. 258 00:16:10,186 --> 00:16:11,971 MAYBE I'LL JUST PUSH THIS THING. 259 00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:13,842 THAT DOESN'T WORK. WHOA! THERE WE GO. THERE'S 260 00:16:13,885 --> 00:16:16,497 SOMETHIN'. I THINK I BROKE IT, MAYBE. OH! 261 00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:20,022 -THERE IT GOES. RIGHT BACK ON. HE DIDN'T EVEN SEE ME. -LOOK, JUST PULL OVER. 262 00:16:20,066 --> 00:16:22,198 -I CAN WALK FASTER THAN THIS. 263 00:16:22,242 --> 00:16:25,245 -ALL RIGHT, FINE. WALK. -THAT'S TWO DOLLARS. HERE YA GO. 264 00:16:25,288 --> 00:16:27,508 NO, WAIT A MINUTE. THA--MY KID MUST'VE 265 00:16:27,551 --> 00:16:30,380 -PUSHED THE BUTTON! WAIT! -TOO BAD! DON'T BRING HIM TO WORK! 266 00:16:30,424 --> 00:16:35,429 -AW, MAN. DID YOU PUSH THE BUTTON? 267 00:16:35,472 --> 00:16:41,043 -YEAH. I THINK I DID. -AW, OH, MAN. -WANT SOME COOKIE? 268 00:16:41,087 --> 00:16:43,089 IT'S A LITTLE MOIST, BUT TAKE A BITE. 269 00:16:48,224 --> 00:16:50,052 DID YOU BRING THE SHOE BOX? 270 00:16:50,096 --> 00:16:51,488 [ Mollie ] IF YOU DON'T STOP 271 00:16:51,532 --> 00:16:53,316 FIGHTING-- -WHAT SHOE BOX? YOU SAW ME CLEAN THE 272 00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:54,926 CLOSET. -DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH ME. BARRY. BAMBI. 273 00:16:58,887 --> 00:17:03,761 [ Continue Arguing ] [ All Chattering ] ALL RIGHT, OKAY, ALL 274 00:17:03,805 --> 00:17:06,503 RIGHT. COME ON. HEY, HEY, HEY! ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! 275 00:17:06,547 --> 00:17:12,466 NOW, LET'S DISCUSS THIS BAD BUSINESS LOAN. 276 00:17:12,509 --> 00:17:14,598 [ Sighs ] BASICALLY, ALL THAT HAPPENED WAS 277 00:17:14,642 --> 00:17:16,687 THAT THEIR UNCLE, ERNIE, CONVINCED THEM THAT IT WOULD BE 278 00:17:16,731 --> 00:17:21,997 A REALLY GREAT IDEA... TO CALL THEIR RESTAURANT "EAT ME RAW." 279 00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:26,523 IT WAS A GREAT IDEA. IT WAS GONNA HAVE SUSHI, STEAK TARTARE... 280 00:17:26,567 --> 00:17:31,050 -AND RAW VEGETABLES. -YOU KNOW, "CRUDDITIES." -IT HAD A CERTAIN 281 00:17:31,093 --> 00:17:33,661 QUIXOTIC QUALITY. -EXCUSE ME. PEOPLE THOUGHT IT WAS 282 00:17:33,704 --> 00:17:37,099 AN X-RATED MOVIE HOUSE. YES, THEY THOUGHT THAT, BUT THEY STILL WANTED 283 00:17:37,143 --> 00:17:38,927 TO EAT THERE. -NO, THEY DIDN'T. -IT WAS A DELIGHTFUL 284 00:17:38,970 --> 00:17:42,017 -PLACE. -EVERYBODY WAS OFFENDED. -ARE YOU OKAY? 285 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:46,413 -I THINK I'M GOING INTO LABOR. -OH, MY GOSH. 286 00:17:46,456 --> 00:17:50,982 THAT'S IT. IT'S TIME TO BLOW THIS POP STAND. 287 00:17:51,026 --> 00:17:54,377 [ Couple Continues Arguing ] GEEZ, I'M ALL CRAMPED, AND THIS THING-- 288 00:17:54,421 --> 00:17:56,945 -DO YOU WANT TO RESCHEDULE? NO, NO. 289 00:17:56,988 --> 00:17:59,426 YOU KNOW, THESE THINGS TAKE HOURS, BELIEVE ME. 290 00:17:59,469 --> 00:18:04,039 ALL RIGHT. LET'S DISCUSS THIS $1,200 LOSS. 291 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:06,172 -I BELIEVE THAT WAS THE SALMON. -SALMON? 292 00:18:06,215 --> 00:18:09,610 WELL, THE WHOLE IDEA OF SUSHI IS THAT IT'S FRESH. 293 00:18:09,653 --> 00:18:11,916 [ Breathing ] I ATE AT A FIVE-STAR RESTAURANT LAST WEEK, 294 00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,483 -LET ME GET JUST A SENTENCE OUT. -AND THEY GAVE ME FROZEN 295 00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:15,137 -SUSHI-- IT WAS STILL COLD. -I DON'T THINK SO. 296 00:18:15,181 --> 00:18:18,488 -I BELIEVE SO. -YOU'RE SO NAIVE WHEN IT COMES TO FROZEN 297 00:18:18,532 --> 00:18:21,839 -SUSHI. -I'M NOT NAIVE! [ Gagging ] 298 00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:25,060 -THIS'LL TEACH ME TO ACCESSORIZE. -COULD WE JUST ESTABLISH 299 00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,931 SOMETHING HERE: DID UNCLE ERNIE HAVE ANY EXPERIENCE 300 00:18:26,975 --> 00:18:29,934 -IN THE RESTAURANT BUSINESS? -NO. -NO. 301 00:18:29,978 --> 00:18:35,070 ERNIE WAS MORE OF A-- AN IDEA MAN. 302 00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,594 -THAT'S GIVING HIM A LOT OF CREDIT. -DO YOU HAVE THE BOOKS 303 00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:40,989 FOR THE RESTAURANT? -BOOKS? -WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 304 00:18:41,032 --> 00:18:44,210 PIECES OF PAPER WITH NUMBERS! DEBITS AND CREDITS HERE! 305 00:18:44,253 --> 00:18:46,473 -NO, WE DON'T HAVE ANY OF THAT STUFF! -WOULD YOU NOT YELL AT HIM? 306 00:18:46,516 --> 00:18:48,649 UNCLE ERNIE WAS AN IDIOT! 307 00:18:48,692 --> 00:18:50,955 IT WAS A STUPID IDEA, AND THEY LOST THEIR SHIRTS, 308 00:18:50,999 --> 00:18:52,914 [ In Demon-like Voice ] SO JUST ALLOW THE FUCKING DEDUCTION! 309 00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,873 [ Panting ] 310 00:18:57,745 --> 00:19:02,315 I HEARD LIFE IS SHORT, BUT THIS IS RIDICULOUS. 311 00:19:02,358 --> 00:19:05,970 [ Beeping ] DON'T BE ALARMED. NOW, YOUR BABY IS IN DISTRESS. 312 00:19:06,014 --> 00:19:09,365 -WHAT? WHAT'S WRONG? -WE'RE GOING TO DO A CESAREAN. 313 00:19:09,409 --> 00:19:11,541 RONA, WHERE IS SHE? OH, HI. 314 00:19:11,585 --> 00:19:14,327 SHE'S RIGHT THROUGH THERE. HI! HEY, MIKEY! 315 00:19:14,370 --> 00:19:19,158 -YOU'RE GONNA BE A BIG BROTHER, DOLL! -AND YOU KNOW WHAT, RONA? 316 00:19:19,201 --> 00:19:22,813 I'M JUST THE RIGHT KID FOR THE JOB. 317 00:19:22,857 --> 00:19:25,338 -DID MY HUSBAND GET HERE YET? -WE CALLED HIM. HE'S COMING. 318 00:19:25,381 --> 00:19:28,689 -OKAY. [ Doctor ] -CLAMP. 319 00:19:28,732 --> 00:19:31,039 -HONEY. -OH, JAMES, THE BABY'S IN 320 00:19:31,082 --> 00:19:33,650 -TROUBLE. -NO, SHE'S OKAY SHE'S COMIN' RIGHT OUT. 321 00:19:33,694 --> 00:19:37,915 -WELL, AT LEAST I'VE ACHIEVED MOST OF MY GOALS. -SPONGE. 322 00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:41,658 -GET THAT. CLAMP. -HONEY, EVERYTHING'S GOOD. YEAH. 323 00:19:41,702 --> 00:19:43,921 [ Doctor ] RIGHT THERE. SCISSORS. OKAY. 324 00:19:43,965 --> 00:19:45,967 [ James ] OH, WOW. LOOK AT THAT. 325 00:19:46,010 --> 00:19:49,405 [ Chuckles Nervously ] -INTERESTING. -ALMOST THERE. 326 00:19:49,449 --> 00:19:52,278 -JUST A BIT LONGER. BLADDER RETRACTOR. -EDUCATIONAL--KIND OF. 327 00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:57,196 -HOLD THIS BLADDER. RIGHT THERE. LET'S GET THIS BLADDER. 328 00:19:57,239 --> 00:19:59,850 -I MEAN, IT'S-- -OKAY. 329 00:20:00,634 --> 00:20:01,896 HMM. 330 00:20:01,939 --> 00:20:04,203 [ Weakly ] I GUESS THIS IS... THE END. 331 00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:11,862 -HERE SHE COMES. -NO, MY NECK! MY NECK! 332 00:20:11,906 --> 00:20:15,779 HEY, YOU WITH THE SCISSORS! CUT ME SOME SLACK HERE! 333 00:20:15,823 --> 00:20:18,782 -THERE YA GO. [ Wailing ] 334 00:20:18,826 --> 00:20:21,785 AW, GEEZ, FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD! 335 00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:28,444 [ Sniffling ] IS SHE REALLY OKAY? 336 00:20:28,488 --> 00:20:29,706 SHE'S FINE. 337 00:20:34,363 --> 00:20:36,496 HOW 'BOUT HIM? [ Laughing ] 338 00:20:36,539 --> 00:20:39,977 -HE'LL BE ALL RIGHT. -THERE YOU GO. 339 00:20:40,021 --> 00:20:44,852 OH, MY PO', SWEET BABY. YEAH. I'M GONNA TAKE 340 00:20:44,895 --> 00:20:48,725 -EXTRA-SPECIAL CARE OF YOU. -HEY, YOU LOOK A LOT 341 00:20:48,769 --> 00:20:53,817 -BETTER FROM THE OUTSIDE. -I'LL TAKE HER NOW. 342 00:20:53,861 --> 00:20:56,733 -HEY, WHERE AM I GOING? -WHERE ARE THEY TAKING HER? 343 00:20:56,777 --> 00:20:58,561 -TO PUT HER IN OBSERVATION. -WHAT HAPPENED TO 344 00:20:58,605 --> 00:21:02,261 -MY QUALITY TIME? BYE, HONEY. -BYE, HONEY. BYE-BYE. 345 00:21:04,785 --> 00:21:06,265 I DON'T WANT TO GO ANY PLACE. [Baby crying] 346 00:21:13,576 --> 00:21:18,668 BYE-BYE, HONEY. BYE-BYE, HONEY. BYE-BYE. BYE-BYE, HONEY. 347 00:21:20,366 --> 00:21:22,846 FIRST A LOUSY BIRTH, AND NOW THIS. 348 00:21:22,890 --> 00:21:24,239 GEEZ, LIFE SUCKS. 349 00:21:27,547 --> 00:21:30,550 OH, YES, YES. YOU'RE NEXT. OH, I HOPE SO. 350 00:21:32,726 --> 00:21:35,729 BYE-BYE. BYE, DADDY. BYE, DOLL. 351 00:21:35,772 --> 00:21:38,427 CONGRATULATIONS! HEY, RONA. THANKS. 352 00:21:38,471 --> 00:21:41,648 -HEY, POP! ALL RIGHT! -HI, HONEY. HOW'S YOUR HEAD? 353 00:21:41,691 --> 00:21:45,391 MMM. MIKEY, THIS IS YOUR SISTER, JULIE. 354 00:21:45,434 --> 00:21:49,351 HIYA, JULIE. WELCOME TO THE OUTSIDE. I'M YOUR BIG BROTHER, MIKEY. 355 00:21:49,395 --> 00:21:51,005 I'M GONNA BE IN CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE FOR THE NEXT 356 00:21:51,048 --> 00:21:53,877 TWO OR THREE YEARS-- SMACKIN' YOU AROUND, GETTING YOU IN SHAPE, 357 00:21:53,921 --> 00:21:57,228 TEACHIN' YOU THINGS. -ANYTHING YOU NEED, DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK. 358 00:21:57,272 --> 00:22:01,450 -WHO'S THIS ASSHOLE? -NO, NO, SAY NO MORE. OF COURSE YOU'RE TIRED 359 00:22:01,494 --> 00:22:04,235 AFTER ALL THAT TRAVELING, ESPECIALLY THAT LONG TRIP DOWN THE BIRTH CANAL. 360 00:22:04,279 --> 00:22:06,890 [ Laughs ] -STOP, YOU'RE KILLIN' ME. -I GOT YOU A LITTLE 361 00:22:06,934 --> 00:22:09,023 SOMETHIN' FOR COMIN' INTO THE WORLD, 362 00:22:09,066 --> 00:22:13,201 AND HERE IT IS. HAVE A COW. -[ Wailing ] GET AWAY! 363 00:22:13,244 --> 00:22:14,637 -ALL RIGHT, FINE. DON'T HAVE A COW. 364 00:22:32,046 --> 00:22:33,569 EDDIE, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE GO GET A APPLE JUICE? 365 00:22:33,613 --> 00:22:36,224 NO, I'M INTO MY TRAININ'. 366 00:22:36,267 --> 00:22:38,792 -WHAT KIND OF TRAINING? -YOU KNOW--WEARIN' 367 00:22:38,835 --> 00:22:42,491 -THE TRAINING PANTS, MAN. -AW, MAN, DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE GOIN' ALONG WITH 368 00:22:42,535 --> 00:22:45,102 -THIS POTTY BUSINESS TOO. -YO, WE HAVE TO, MIKE, 'CAUSE 369 00:22:45,146 --> 00:22:49,324 -THE TOILET MAN SAYS SO. -WHO? -MR. TOILET MAN. HE LIKES 370 00:22:49,368 --> 00:22:51,108 TO EAT YOUR DOO-DOO AND YOUR PEE-PEE, 371 00:22:51,152 --> 00:22:53,937 SO I SAY, GIVE IT TO HIM. -EAT YOUR DOO-DOO AND YOUR PEE-PEE? 372 00:22:53,981 --> 00:22:57,637 WHO TOLD YOU THAT? MY MOTHER. WHY? YOU CALLIN' HER A LIAR? 373 00:22:57,680 --> 00:23:01,423 -NO, I'M NOT CALLING HER-- -SHE TOLD ME THAT DIAPERS ARE FOR 374 00:23:01,467 --> 00:23:04,513 BABIES. BUT EAT YOUR DOO-DOO AND YOUR PEE-PEE? 375 00:23:04,557 --> 00:23:07,429 EDDIE, THE THOUGHT IS TOO HIDEOUS TO COMPREHEND. 376 00:23:07,473 --> 00:23:09,257 -OH, YEAH? -I'LL TELL YA WHAT. LET'S TAKE 377 00:23:09,300 --> 00:23:12,869 -MY LITTLE SISTER FOR A WALK. -ALL RIGHT. 378 00:23:12,913 --> 00:23:14,915 OKAY, QUICK, WHILE THE MOMS AREN'T LOOKING. 379 00:23:14,958 --> 00:23:16,873 COME ON, LET'S TAKE HER TO THE ZOO AND LEAVE HER THERE. 380 00:23:16,917 --> 00:23:20,921 -GOOD IDEA. -HE WOULD HAVE A FRIEND. -I DON'T THINK SHE'S 381 00:23:20,964 --> 00:23:23,010 GONNA LIKE THE LIONS, EDDIE. -AND THEY'RE BOTH 382 00:23:23,053 --> 00:23:27,318 SCHMUCKS. [ Wailing ] MOMMY! MOMMY! 383 00:23:27,362 --> 00:23:30,800 -WAIT, WAIT, WAIT! -UH-OH, BUSTED. -OH, HONEY, YOU OKAY? 384 00:23:30,844 --> 00:23:33,847 -YEAH, SHE'S FINE. -DON'T EVER TAKE YOUR 385 00:23:33,890 --> 00:23:35,544 SISTER AWAY LIKE THAT. YOU MADE MOMMY'S 386 00:23:35,588 --> 00:23:38,895 -HEART JUMP INTO HER THROAT. -MOM, DO YOU HAVE TO BE 387 00:23:38,939 --> 00:23:41,507 SO GRAPHIC? I WAS JUST TAKIN' HER FOR A WALK. I THOUGHT 388 00:23:41,550 --> 00:23:45,119 SHE'D HAVE A GOOD TIME. I'M SORRY. 389 00:23:45,162 --> 00:23:49,993 -ARE YOU OKAY, SWEETHEART? -HERE, LET ME GIVE YOU A PRESENT. 390 00:23:50,037 --> 00:23:55,172 -HERE. WHAT'S THIS? -OH, MY GOD. 391 00:23:55,216 --> 00:23:57,305 -YUCK! WHAT IS IT? -WELL, IT'S HOSPITAL GARBAGE. 392 00:23:57,348 --> 00:24:00,874 -THEY MAKE CRACK PIPES OUT OF THESE. -OOOH. 393 00:24:00,917 --> 00:24:03,833 -OH. LET ME SEE YOUR HANDS. -OH, MY HANDS ARE OKAY, MA. 394 00:24:03,877 --> 00:24:05,574 OH, NO, DON'T-- OH, PLEASE, DON'T-- NO, DON'T--NO, PLEASE. 395 00:24:05,618 --> 00:24:08,925 -THEY'RE OKAY. THEY'RE CLEAN. -GIVE MOMMY YOUR HANDS. 396 00:24:08,969 --> 00:24:11,885 [ Grumbling ] THAT IS IT. I HAVE HAD IT WITH THIS PARK. 397 00:24:11,928 --> 00:24:13,626 SORRY, HONEY. SHE DIDN'T MEAN TO THROW THAT ON YOU. 398 00:24:22,896 --> 00:24:25,507 -MIKEY, TIME TO GO TO BED. -WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'? 399 00:24:25,551 --> 00:24:27,204 I TOLD HIM HE COULD WATCH A VIDEO. [ TV Clicks On ] 400 00:24:27,248 --> 00:24:30,033 -HE NEEDS TO GO TO BED. -BUT I MADE A PROMISE HE COULD 401 00:24:30,077 --> 00:24:32,732 FINISH WATCHING THE VIDEO. -HE CAN FINISH IT 402 00:24:32,775 --> 00:24:35,386 -TOMORROW. HE'S TIRED. -DON'T UNDERMINE ME. 403 00:24:35,430 --> 00:24:39,521 -YOU DON'T UNDERMINE ME. -LET'S TAKE IT OUTSIDE. OKAY. 404 00:24:39,565 --> 00:24:42,524 ♪ AH-DEE-AH-DEE-AH-DEE AH-DEE-AH-DEE-AH-DEE AYE 405 00:24:42,568 --> 00:24:45,222 ♪ AH-DEE-AH-DEE-AH-DEE AH-DEE-AH-DEE-AH-DEE AYE 406 00:24:45,266 --> 00:24:46,702 ♪ EE-DEE-EE-DEE-EE-DEE EE-DEE-EE-DEE-EE-DEE EEE 407 00:24:51,620 --> 00:24:54,275 ♪ EE-DEE-EE-DEE-EE-DEE JUST BECAUSE SHE'S A BABY I HAVE TO GO TO BED EARLY. ♪ 408 00:24:54,318 --> 00:24:57,757 -WHAT ARE YOU LOOKIN' AT? -IF I SAY MIKEY CAN DO 409 00:24:57,800 --> 00:24:59,541 SOMETHING AND YOU COME ALONG AND SAY HE CAN'T, 410 00:24:59,585 --> 00:25:01,543 THEN YOU'RE CUTTING MY NUTS OFF RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM-- 411 00:25:01,587 --> 00:25:03,545 -HOW CAN I BE A GOOD DAD? -SO BECAUSE YOU'RE THE MAN, 412 00:25:03,589 --> 00:25:05,634 AND YOU HAVE THE NUTS, YOU GET TO MAKE ALL THE DECISIONS? 413 00:25:05,678 --> 00:25:07,636 I DON'T GET TO MAKE ALL THE DECISIONS 414 00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:12,685 BECAUSE I'M THE MAN. LOOK, IF I PROMISE HIM SOMETHING, OKAY, DON'T 415 00:25:12,728 --> 00:25:14,600 MAKE ME LOOK LIKE AN ASSHOLE. 416 00:25:14,643 --> 00:25:16,732 OH, YOU'RE DOIN' A GOOD JOB OF THAT YOURSELF. 417 00:25:16,776 --> 00:25:19,953 -KEEP IT DOWN OUT THERE. -PLEASE? -I AM HIS MOTHER. 418 00:25:19,996 --> 00:25:22,259 I SEE MY TIRED BABY SITTING THERE, AND I KNOW THAT HE'S GOT 419 00:25:22,303 --> 00:25:25,045 TO GET UP EARLY THE NEXT MORNING. 420 00:25:25,088 --> 00:25:27,743 -[ Laughing ] FOR WHAT? -BECAUSE I'M TAKING HIM TO BABY GYM. 421 00:25:27,787 --> 00:25:30,964 -OH, NO. NOT BABY GYM. -HE NEEDS TO LEARN TO SOCIALIZE WITH OTHER KIDS. 422 00:25:31,007 --> 00:25:32,661 WELL, TAKE HIM TO THE PARK. 423 00:25:32,705 --> 00:25:36,578 I'M NOT TAKING HIM TO THE PARK ANYMORE. TODAY HE PICKED UP A 424 00:25:36,622 --> 00:25:39,102 -CRACK PIPE. -WELL, THROW IT OUT! -DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA 425 00:25:39,146 --> 00:25:41,801 -HOW MANY DISEASES HE COULD GET? -GOD, YOU'RE SO SCARED! 426 00:25:41,844 --> 00:25:43,933 YOU'RE GONNA BRING HIM UP TO BE A REAL CRYBABY. I CAN SEE IT. 427 00:25:43,977 --> 00:25:46,893 I AM GOING TO BABY GYM, AND I DON'T SEE 428 00:25:46,936 --> 00:25:49,678 -WHY YOU CARE ANYWAY. -WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN? 429 00:25:49,722 --> 00:25:51,854 -WHAT DO YOU MEAN, "WHAT DOES IT MEAN?" -I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS. 430 00:25:51,898 --> 00:25:54,117 IT MEANS THAT IT'S YOUR MONEY, SO I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO 431 00:25:54,161 --> 00:25:56,380 -CARE. -I DID NOT SAY THAT. -THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE 432 00:25:56,424 --> 00:25:59,601 THINKIN', THAT YOU EARN MORE MONEY, SO YOU CAN MAKE THE 433 00:25:59,645 --> 00:26:01,603 -DECISIONS, AND I'M OUTTA HERE. -I DO NOT MAKE THE 434 00:26:01,647 --> 00:26:04,388 DECISIONS, AND I HAVE NEVER, EVER, BROUGHT UP MONEY WITH YOU! 435 00:26:04,432 --> 00:26:06,477 WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE YOUR WAY? 436 00:26:06,521 --> 00:26:08,392 IT DOESN'T! OH, YOU! SHUT UP, YOU! 437 00:26:08,436 --> 00:26:10,873 [ Neighbor ] SHUT UP! 438 00:26:10,917 --> 00:26:13,572 LET'S TAKE STOCK HERE. [ Arguing Continues ] 439 00:26:13,615 --> 00:26:17,010 MY BROTHER IS 27 POUNDS OF STUPID. 440 00:26:17,053 --> 00:26:19,534 [ Mollie ] NOW, LOOK AT THAT! -MY PARENTS ARE OKAY SEPARATELY, 441 00:26:19,578 --> 00:26:21,623 -BUT AS A COUPLE THEY STINK. -WELL, WHY DON'T YOU JUST 442 00:26:21,667 --> 00:26:25,061 PUT ME IN A FUCKIN' DRESS? -[Arguing Continues] 443 00:26:25,105 --> 00:26:28,412 [ Sighs ] I GUESS YOU'RE MY ONLY FRIEND, HERBIE. 444 00:26:28,456 --> 00:26:30,980 INTELLECTUALLY, I KNOW IT TAKES AT LEAST THREE DATES 445 00:26:31,024 --> 00:26:34,157 TO KNOW SOMEBODY, BUT, EMOTIONALLY, I'LL JUST LOOK 446 00:26:34,201 --> 00:26:37,639 AT THE WAY HE'LL EAT SOMETHING DISGUSTING, LIKE CHILI DOGS. 447 00:26:37,683 --> 00:26:39,728 AND THEN THIS VOICE INSIDE ME 448 00:26:39,772 --> 00:26:41,643 SAYS, "YOU CAN'T SPEND THE NEXT 60 OR 70 YEARS WITH THIS 449 00:26:41,687 --> 00:26:44,211 -GUY." -BOY, YOU'RE PLANNING ON LIVING A LONG TIME. 450 00:26:44,254 --> 00:26:47,083 MOLLIE, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. LIKE, YOU AND JAMES HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOREVER. 451 00:26:47,127 --> 00:26:50,260 -YEAH, A YEAR AND A HALF. -FOR A NON-OBSESSIVE 452 00:26:50,304 --> 00:26:53,046 -RELATIONSHIP, THAT'S PRETTY GOOD. -YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE? 453 00:26:53,089 --> 00:26:55,701 WHAT? I HATE THE WAY JAMES IS ALWAYS TELLING 454 00:26:55,744 --> 00:26:58,051 ME HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MIKEY. 455 00:26:58,094 --> 00:27:01,663 YOU KNOW, LIKE I CARRIED THE KID FOR NINE MONTHS. OH. 456 00:27:01,707 --> 00:27:03,883 I'M THE ONE WHO WENT THROUGH LABOR AND ALL THAT PAIN. 457 00:27:03,926 --> 00:27:05,667 I THINK I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. I SHOULD BE LORD AND 458 00:27:05,711 --> 00:27:07,234 -EMPEROR OF THAT CHILD. -YEAH. 459 00:27:07,277 --> 00:27:11,107 I THINK MAYBE HE JUST GETS FRUSTRATED, YOU KNOW, 460 00:27:11,151 --> 00:27:14,328 BECAUSE HE DOESN'T HAVE A JOB THAT HE LOVES, LIKE WE 461 00:27:14,371 --> 00:27:17,940 DO. WE'RE REALLY LUCKY. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. 462 00:27:17,984 --> 00:27:20,726 -I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU TO DO. -YOU KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE TO 463 00:27:20,769 --> 00:27:24,643 DO? YOU HAVE TO TAKE CONTROL OF THE SITUATION. 464 00:27:24,686 --> 00:27:26,949 YOU CAN'T SIT AROUND WAITING FOR THIS SCHMENDRICK YOU 465 00:27:26,993 --> 00:27:29,691 MARRIED TO GET HIS ACT TOGETHER. HE IS NOT A SCHMENDRICK. 466 00:27:29,735 --> 00:27:32,302 HE IS A GOOD FATHER, AND, FOR YOUR INFORMATION, 467 00:27:32,346 --> 00:27:35,436 HE WORKS REAL HARD. WELL, THAT'S THE TROUBLE. HE WORKS HIS ASS OFF 468 00:27:35,479 --> 00:27:39,745 FOR NOTHING. NOW, DADDY HAS AN ACCOUNT WITH CORPORATE PILOTS. 469 00:27:39,788 --> 00:27:43,705 THEY EARN BETWEEN $30,000 AND $50,000 A YEAR. 470 00:27:43,749 --> 00:27:46,229 I WISH JAMES COULD GET A JOB LIKE THAT. [ Chuckles ] 471 00:27:46,273 --> 00:27:49,755 I'M WAY AHEAD OF YOU. WE ALREADY ASKED. ALL JAMES HAS TO DO 472 00:27:49,798 --> 00:27:53,193 IS CALL FREDDIE, TELL HIM HOW MANY HOURS, WHAT KINDS OF PLANES, 473 00:27:53,236 --> 00:27:55,761 THINGS LIKE THAT. NO. OH, MA! YOU KNOW IF JAMES HAD A 474 00:27:55,804 --> 00:27:57,414 JOB THAT HE REALLY LOVED AND HE COULD MAKE MONEY-- 475 00:27:57,458 --> 00:28:01,114 OH, THAT WOULD BE GREAT FOR US. AND YOU HAVE DADDY TO 476 00:28:01,157 --> 00:28:02,811 THANK. 477 00:28:02,855 --> 00:28:06,728 -SIX. SIX. -SIX DOLLAR. -YEAH. 478 00:28:06,772 --> 00:28:09,731 GRANDPA, A CARD'S A CARD. DO YOU HAVE TO NAME 'EM ALL? 479 00:28:12,212 --> 00:28:14,736 WHAT KIND OF EQUIPMENT DO THEY FLY? 480 00:28:14,780 --> 00:28:18,131 -I DON'T KNOW. YOU'LL FIND OUT. -WELL, AT LEAST WITH MY JOB, 481 00:28:18,174 --> 00:28:21,743 -I CAN FLY DIFFERENT TYPES OF AIRPLANES. -JIMMY, WHAT DOES IT 482 00:28:21,787 --> 00:28:24,572 -MATTER? A JET'S A JET. -WELL, YOU DON'T LOVE 483 00:28:24,615 --> 00:28:28,184 FLYING, SO IT WOULDN'T MATTER TO YOU. 484 00:28:28,228 --> 00:28:30,143 YOU KNOW, I DON'T THINK THIS IS ABOUT WHAT KIND OF 485 00:28:30,186 --> 00:28:31,927 AIRPLANES THEY HAVE TO FLY. WHAT IS IT? 486 00:28:31,971 --> 00:28:33,929 YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT IS? I'LL TELL YOU WHAT IT IS. 487 00:28:33,973 --> 00:28:36,584 -IT'S YOUR MOTHER, OKAY? -MY MOTHER? -YOU DON'T MIND THEM 488 00:28:36,627 --> 00:28:38,238 CONTROLLING YOUR LIFE, BUT I MIND THEM CONTROLLING-- 489 00:28:38,281 --> 00:28:40,327 -THEY DO NOT CONTROL MY LIFE. -OH, WHY ARE YOU AND 490 00:28:40,370 --> 00:28:43,504 -YOUR BROTHER ACCOUNTANTS? -BECAUSE WE DEARLY LOVE IT. 491 00:28:43,547 --> 00:28:44,940 [ Laughing ] OH, COME ON. "DEARLY." 492 00:28:46,812 --> 00:28:51,033 -YOU-YOU DEARLY LOVE BEING ACCOUNTANTS? -I DO, BECAUSE IT DEALS 493 00:28:51,077 --> 00:28:53,427 WITH MY TWO FAVORITE THINGS: NUMBERS AND PEOPLE. 494 00:28:53,470 --> 00:28:55,603 AND YOU KNOW ANOTHER THING? THEY CHECK OUR TAX RETURN 495 00:28:55,646 --> 00:28:57,648 EVERY YEAR TO MAKE ME LOOK STUPID. 496 00:28:57,692 --> 00:29:01,391 -OH, THAT ISN'T TRUE. AND YOU SAID IT WAS OKAY. -WELL, MAYBE IT'S NOT. 497 00:29:01,435 --> 00:29:03,829 LOOK, JUST DON'T TAKE THE JOB. I DON'T CARE ONE WAY OR 498 00:29:03,872 --> 00:29:05,569 -ANOTHER. -ALL RIGHT. FINE. I WON'T. 499 00:29:18,452 --> 00:29:19,453 [ Sniffles ] 500 00:29:29,115 --> 00:29:30,899 OH, HONEY. [ Crying ] 501 00:29:30,943 --> 00:29:34,337 I'M SORRY. OH, SWEETHEART. 502 00:29:36,513 --> 00:29:40,779 -I WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP. -I KNOW YOU WERE HELPING ME. 503 00:29:40,822 --> 00:29:43,042 [ Sniffles ] I THOUGHT THAT IF YOU DID 504 00:29:43,085 --> 00:29:45,871 SOMETHING THAT YOU REALLY LOVED THAT YOU WOULD BE HAPPY. 505 00:29:45,914 --> 00:29:47,437 I KNOW, I'M STUPID. I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID ANYTHING. 506 00:29:47,481 --> 00:29:51,267 MY MOM AND DAD WERE JUST TRYING TO HELP, SO THEY TALKED 507 00:29:51,311 --> 00:29:53,530 TO THEIR FRIENDS, AND NOW YOU HATE THEM. 508 00:29:53,574 --> 00:29:57,186 -I DON'T HATE THEM. -AND I'VE ALWAYS BEEN REALLY NICE TO YOUR MOTHER. 509 00:29:57,230 --> 00:29:58,840 OH, HONEY, LOOK. I'LL CALL FREDDIE 510 00:29:58,884 --> 00:30:02,191 TOMORROW, OKAY? DON'T CALL HIM 511 00:30:02,235 --> 00:30:05,455 JUST BECAUSE I'M BAWLING. I'LL FIND OUT WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT, AND I WON'T 512 00:30:05,499 --> 00:30:09,546 PROMISE YOU ANYTHING. OKAY? IT WON'T BE BECAUSE YOU'RE CRYING. 513 00:30:09,590 --> 00:30:10,983 -OKAY. OKAY. -OKAY. ALL RIGHT. GIMME A KISS. 514 00:30:17,293 --> 00:30:21,471 [ Knocking ] [ Sighs ] WHO THE HELL IS THAT? 515 00:30:21,515 --> 00:30:25,736 [ Knocking Continues ] WHO IS IT? DAMN IT. SOUNDS LIKE SOME KIND OF 516 00:30:25,780 --> 00:30:27,913 NUT. HERE, LET ME-- [ Mollie Gasps ] 517 00:30:30,393 --> 00:30:34,833 [ Sighs ] -DO YOU KNOW WHO I HATE? -STUART! HOW YOU DOIN'? 518 00:30:34,876 --> 00:30:36,617 YOU'RE BACK IN TOWN! THIS IS MY BROTHER. THIS IS 519 00:30:36,660 --> 00:30:38,793 JAMES. I HATE THESE DAMN ORIENTALS. 520 00:30:38,837 --> 00:30:41,752 THEY'RE BUYIN' UP THIS WHOLE DAMN COUNTRY. NOW, DO YOU KNOW WHY? 521 00:30:41,796 --> 00:30:44,494 -HE'S THE ACCOUNTANT FOR MITSUBISHI. -NOT ANYMORE. THE WAY I 522 00:30:44,538 --> 00:30:46,627 LOOK AT IT IS AMERICANS HAVE TURNED 523 00:30:46,670 --> 00:30:49,543 INTO FAT, LAZY SLOBS... WHO'D RATHER SELL OFF THEIR TOES 524 00:30:49,586 --> 00:30:51,719 THAN GET OFF THEIR BUTTS AND WALK HALF A BLOCK. YOU THINK I COULD 525 00:30:51,762 --> 00:30:53,547 STAY HERE FOR A LITTLE WHILE UNTIL I GET A NEW JOB? 526 00:30:53,590 --> 00:30:55,549 YOU CAN STAY HERE AS LONG AS YOU WANT. 527 00:30:55,592 --> 00:30:58,857 [ Playful Grunting Sounds ] I'LL MAKE UP THE COUCH! YES! 528 00:30:59,509 --> 00:31:01,424 MOLLIE? MOLLIE! 529 00:31:05,951 --> 00:31:08,997 OH, WHAT A DILEMMA. DO I STAY, OR DO I PEE? 530 00:31:11,086 --> 00:31:14,437 WHAT IF EDDIE SAID WAS TRUE? MR. TOILET MAN EATING 531 00:31:14,481 --> 00:31:19,486 YOUR PEE-PEE? OH, WELL. I GUESS I REALLY DON'T BELIEVE 532 00:31:19,529 --> 00:31:23,533 THAT. BUT THEN, ON THE OTHER HAND, 533 00:31:23,577 --> 00:31:27,146 WHAT IF THERE IS A MR. TOILET MAN? WELL, I THINK I BETTER 534 00:31:27,189 --> 00:31:33,152 JUST TURN THE LIGHT ON, JUST TO MAKE SURE. AH, JUST AS I THOUGHT. 535 00:31:33,195 --> 00:31:35,632 JUST A REGULAR OLD TOILET, HUH? 536 00:31:35,676 --> 00:31:39,027 WAIT TILL I TELL EDDIE ABOUT THIS. EDDIE AND HIS BONEHEAD 537 00:31:39,071 --> 00:31:42,117 -IDEAS. -HEY, YOU, YOU LITTLE PISHER! 538 00:31:42,161 --> 00:31:44,337 -I'M TALKIN' TO YOU! -OH, NO! WHAT IS THAT? -HEY, YOU'RE SUPPOSED 539 00:31:44,380 --> 00:31:47,166 -TO GIVE ME SOME PEE-PEE! WHERE'S THAT PEE-PEE? -WE'RE TALKIN' ABOUT 540 00:31:47,209 --> 00:31:51,213 PEE-PEE. I NEED THAT PEE-PEE! -OH, NO! MR. TOILET MAN! 541 00:31:51,257 --> 00:31:52,693 LISTEN, I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU. 542 00:31:52,736 --> 00:31:55,391 YOU BETTER GIVE ME THAT PEE-PEE. GIVE IT TO ME, 543 00:31:55,435 --> 00:31:57,306 OR THE NEXT TIME YOU SIT ON ME, I'M GONNA BITE OFF YOUR 544 00:31:57,350 --> 00:32:00,266 TUSHY! -YES! YES! [ Laughs Maniacally ] 545 00:32:00,309 --> 00:32:02,746 -[ Screaming ] 546 00:32:08,361 --> 00:32:10,363 OH, IT'S OKAY, HONEY. 547 00:32:10,493 --> 00:32:11,712 MOMMY'S HERE. 548 00:32:11,755 --> 00:32:15,281 MOMMY. YEAH. MOMMY, DADDY. POTTY. 549 00:32:15,324 --> 00:32:17,022 MOMMY'S HERE. OHH, SWEETHEART. IT'S JUST A DREAM. 550 00:32:17,065 --> 00:32:19,024 -IT'S JUST A DREAM. -TOILET MAN. IT WAS... SCARY. 551 00:32:19,067 --> 00:32:20,112 OKAY? 552 00:32:20,155 --> 00:32:21,983 [ Stuart ] THE PROBLEM WITH THIS 553 00:32:22,027 --> 00:32:23,724 -COUNTRY? -GET A LOAD OF THOSE EYEBROWS. 554 00:32:23,767 --> 00:32:25,334 -IT'S A COUNTRY OF SOFTS. [ Julie Continuing ] -WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH 555 00:32:25,378 --> 00:32:29,295 EYEBROWS? [ Stuart Continues ] EYES, I UNDERSTAND. 556 00:32:29,338 --> 00:32:32,863 -MOUTHS, I UNDERSTAND. BUT EYEBROWS? -WHY WASTE MONEY ON NEW 557 00:32:32,907 --> 00:32:35,866 -BOMBS-- -I WONDER IF I'LL HAVE A SET LIKE HIS. 558 00:32:35,910 --> 00:32:39,696 -AM I RIGHT? -DADDY DOESN'T HAVE A SET LIKE HIS. 559 00:32:39,740 --> 00:32:41,829 GOOD LUCK ON YOUR JOB INTERVIEW, STUDEBAKER. 560 00:32:41,872 --> 00:32:43,613 IT'S A CONFUSING QUESTION. BUT I GUESS I'LL LEARN 561 00:32:43,657 --> 00:32:45,267 -SOMEDAY. [ Door Slams Shut ] -MOLLIE, 562 00:32:45,311 --> 00:32:48,227 -I WANT HIM OUT OF THE HOUSE. -OH, WE'RE GOING OUT! 563 00:32:48,270 --> 00:32:51,665 WE'RE GETTING READY TO GO OUT! I'M SO EXCITED! 564 00:32:51,708 --> 00:32:54,146 -I GOT YOUR NOSE! -OH, DADDY, DON'T TAKE MY NOSE. 565 00:32:54,189 --> 00:32:57,453 -I GOT YOUR NOSE! [ Yammers Baby Talk ] OH, HI, MOMMY. 566 00:32:57,497 --> 00:32:59,934 MOMMY, LET'S TAKE THE PLAY-DOH WITH US. THERE'S 567 00:32:59,978 --> 00:33:02,284 SOMETHING I SAW I'D LIKE TO BUILD WITH YOU, 568 00:33:02,328 --> 00:33:07,246 AND IF YOU'D JUST GET IT-- MOM? MOMMY? 569 00:33:08,638 --> 00:33:11,293 DADDY? 570 00:33:11,337 --> 00:33:15,819 -[ Door Slams Shut ] WHERE'D EVERYBODY GO? WHAT HAVE I DONE 571 00:33:15,863 --> 00:33:21,042 -TO DESERVE THIS? -HEY, JULIE, DON'T WORRY. I'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU. 572 00:33:21,086 --> 00:33:23,697 YOU'RE TOO LITTLE! 573 00:33:23,740 --> 00:33:27,353 YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN MY BROTHER WHEN HE WAS A KID. OH! HE WAS SO CUTE. 574 00:33:27,396 --> 00:33:29,964 AND SWEET? I MEAN-- BUT NO MATTER WHAT HE DID, 575 00:33:30,008 --> 00:33:33,620 HE WOULD GET IN TROUBLE. EVERYONE WAS ALWAYS SCREAMING AT HIM. 576 00:33:33,663 --> 00:33:37,624 -YEAH. DADDY WAS LIKE-- -HE LOOKS JUST LIKE LEON. 577 00:33:37,667 --> 00:33:40,844 -EVERYBODY LOOKS LIKE LEON. -DO YOU THINK SO? 578 00:33:40,888 --> 00:33:42,759 YOU KNOW, I THINK IF MY BROTHER WAS IN A LOVING 579 00:33:42,803 --> 00:33:44,544 ENVIRONMENT LIKE MY HOUSE... THAT HE WOULD REALLY 580 00:33:44,587 --> 00:33:46,024 STRAIGHTEN OUT. 581 00:33:53,553 --> 00:33:56,512 ALL RIGHT, AND SHUTTING DOWN. 582 00:33:56,556 --> 00:34:01,430 OKAY. THANKS A LOT, BILL. OKAY, HERE WE ARE. [ Chattering ] 583 00:34:07,175 --> 00:34:10,613 -EXCUSE ME. HERE WE GO. -WHERE'S THE BRIEFCASE? 584 00:34:10,657 --> 00:34:12,354 -DID YOU LEAVE IT ON THE PLANE? -NO, I DIDN'T. 585 00:34:12,398 --> 00:34:14,487 ONE MINUTE, ONE MINUTE. 586 00:34:14,530 --> 00:34:16,880 -AH, THANKS. -I'LL LOCK UP, JAMES. -YOU BET. 587 00:34:16,924 --> 00:34:21,363 -ALL RIGHT, HERE WE ARE. -THANK YOU. -GOOD NIGHT. 588 00:34:22,277 --> 00:34:26,629 DICKFACE. GEEZ. 589 00:34:26,673 --> 00:34:30,372 -HI, ELVIS. HOW'D IT GO? -HEY, PRISCILLA. 590 00:34:30,416 --> 00:34:32,505 WHICH PART? WHERE THEY BLAMED ME FOR THE TURBULENCE 591 00:34:32,548 --> 00:34:33,941 SPILLING RED WINE ON THEIR CLOTHES, 592 00:34:33,984 --> 00:34:36,117 OR THE PART WHERE THEY BAWLED ME OUT FOR WEAK COFFEE? 593 00:34:36,161 --> 00:34:38,163 OH, HONEY, YOU PROBABLY JUST GOT A COUPLE OF CREEPS. 594 00:34:38,206 --> 00:34:40,295 YEAH, RIGHT. BUT DIDN'T IT FEEL GREAT UP THERE IN THAT JET, NOT 595 00:34:40,339 --> 00:34:42,384 HAVING TO WORRY ABOUT DRIVING THE CAB? 596 00:34:42,428 --> 00:34:45,126 -I MEAN, DIDN'T THAT MAKE IT ALL WORTHWHILE? -YEAH, I LOVE FLYIN' A 597 00:34:45,170 --> 00:34:47,650 LEAR JET. IT'S JUST THIS BEEPER LIFESTYLE. 598 00:34:47,694 --> 00:34:51,219 I MEAN, YOU'RE ON CALL ANYTIME, HONEY. THAT MEANS WE CAN'T 599 00:34:51,263 --> 00:34:54,266 PLAN VACATIONS. WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS? I MEAN, COME ON. 600 00:34:54,309 --> 00:34:57,138 -AM I A WAITER OR A PILOT? -OTHER THAN THAT, 601 00:34:57,182 --> 00:35:01,708 HOW'D YOU LIKE IT? [ Growls ] [ Laughs ] 602 00:35:01,751 --> 00:35:05,233 -DID YOU LIKE IT? I KNEW YOU'D LIKE IT. -YEAH, IT WAS ALL RIGHT. 603 00:35:05,277 --> 00:35:09,281 ALL RIGHT. I THINK I'M GONNA TRY IT. YEAH, YEAH. IT'S SOLID. 604 00:35:09,324 --> 00:35:13,241 OH, I GOTTA BE HONEST WITH MYSELF HERE. I'M A FAILURE AS A BIG 605 00:35:13,285 --> 00:35:16,810 -BROTHER. I MEAN, LOOK AT HER. -AND I'M GOIN'. I'M GOIN'. 606 00:35:16,853 --> 00:35:20,422 -I'M... KIDDIN' MYSELF. -I TEACH HER HOW TO CRAWL, AND SHE'D BOUNCIN' AROUND 607 00:35:20,466 --> 00:35:26,254 -LIKE A COCKER SPANIEL. -HERE I GO. OH! UH-OH. 608 00:35:26,298 --> 00:35:28,387 -YEAH. I'M GOIN'. I'M GOING. -WAIT A MINUTE NOW. 609 00:35:28,430 --> 00:35:33,435 SHE'S UP. SHE'S MOBILE. SHE'S MOVIN'. 610 00:35:33,479 --> 00:35:37,874 SHE'S HEADIN' RIGHT FOR MY TOYS. HMM. WELL, MAYBE I BETTER 611 00:35:37,918 --> 00:35:39,876 SHOW HER ABOUT TOYS RIGHT AWAY... BEFORE SHE DOES 612 00:35:39,920 --> 00:35:44,011 SOMETHING DRASTIC TO ONE OF MY TOYS. ALL RIGHT, LET ME SHOW 613 00:35:44,054 --> 00:35:46,318 YOU SOMETHING. COME HERE. THESE ARE ALL TOYS, RIGHT? 614 00:35:46,361 --> 00:35:48,276 -YEAH. -SOME OF THEM ARE MINE, 615 00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:50,191 SOME OF THEM ARE YOURS. THE WAY YOU TELL THE DIFFERENCE 616 00:35:50,235 --> 00:35:52,411 -IS I HAVE ALL THE GREAT TOYS, -LET ME SEE IT. 617 00:35:52,454 --> 00:35:55,196 CAN'T I SEE THAT? AND YOU HAVE ALL THESE STUPID LITTLE... 618 00:35:55,240 --> 00:35:56,893 -DON'T-HURT-YOURSELF BABY TOYS. -GEEZ. BUT I LIKE IT. 619 00:35:56,937 --> 00:35:59,461 WELL, OF COURSE YOU LIKE IT. IT'S A BIG-BOY TOY. 620 00:35:59,505 --> 00:36:01,768 -WELL, CAN'T I JUST SEE IT FOR A LITTLE WHILE? 621 00:36:01,811 --> 00:36:03,900 -YOU CAN'T HAVE IT. YOU THINK YOU CAN JUMP RIGHT INTO A TOY LIKE 622 00:36:03,944 --> 00:36:05,815 THIS? [ Chuckles ] GROW UP, KID. 623 00:36:05,859 --> 00:36:10,124 -GEEZ, HE'S ALWAYS SO MEAN TO ME. -LOOK, HERE'S A TOY YOU 624 00:36:10,168 --> 00:36:13,519 -CAN PLAY WITH--A NERF BALL. -I DON'T LIKE BALLS! 625 00:36:13,562 --> 00:36:15,782 OH, DON'T CRY AGAIN. [ Sighs ] [ Stuart Shouting ] 626 00:36:21,179 --> 00:36:26,401 -FREEZE! -WHAT THE-- WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 627 00:36:26,445 --> 00:36:28,577 -I'M SORRY, MAN. -YOU HAVE A GUN IN MY HOUSE? 628 00:36:28,621 --> 00:36:31,058 -THERE ARE KIDS HERE! -IT'S ONLY NINE MILLIMETER. 629 00:36:31,101 --> 00:36:32,712 -IT'S NOT LOADED. -OH, MAN. THAT'S WHAT IS EXACTLY 630 00:36:32,755 --> 00:36:34,801 THE STUPID THING PEOPLE SAY... WHEN THEY ACCIDENTALLY 631 00:36:34,844 --> 00:36:36,890 KILL SOMEONE--"OH, I DIDN'T THINK 632 00:36:36,933 --> 00:36:38,892 -IT WAS LOADED." -YOU KNOW, YOU GUYS MAKE ME LAUGH. 633 00:36:38,935 --> 00:36:42,939 YOU'RE REALLY FUNNY. YOU KNOW, YOU STOCK UP YOUR CABINETS WITH 634 00:36:42,983 --> 00:36:46,160 BOTTLED WATER AND FLASHLIGHTS, BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK IS 635 00:36:46,204 --> 00:36:49,250 GONNA HAPPEN WHEN THE SHIT REALLY HITS THE FAN, HUH? 636 00:36:49,294 --> 00:36:52,471 LIKE EARTHQUAKES OR FLASH FLOODS OR MUD 637 00:36:52,514 --> 00:36:54,560 SLIDES, OR JUST, LIKE, A LOT OF CHAOS AND 638 00:36:54,603 --> 00:36:56,518 HORROR, PEOPLE DYING IN THE STREETS, 639 00:36:56,562 --> 00:36:59,565 AND YOU'RE SITTING NICE AND PRETTY WITH YOUR BOTTLED WATER? 640 00:36:59,608 --> 00:37:04,178 NOW, THE GUY NEXT DOOR HAS GOT ONE OF THESE. WHO'S GONNA GO THIRSTY-- 641 00:37:04,222 --> 00:37:06,224 HIM OR YOU? [ Exhales ] I MEAN, 642 00:37:09,618 --> 00:37:12,578 -THINK ABOUT IT. -YOU'RE NUTS. [ Groans] 643 00:37:17,496 --> 00:37:20,803 MOLLIE, I DON'T WANT THAT MANIAC AROUND THE 644 00:37:20,847 --> 00:37:23,153 -KIDS. -HE'S THEIR UNCLE. -OH, HE'S A MANIAC! 645 00:37:23,197 --> 00:37:25,765 -HE SLEEPS WITH A GUN. -OH, HE DOES NOT. -HE DOES TOO. HE TRIED 646 00:37:25,808 --> 00:37:28,898 -TO SHOOT ME WHEN I CAME IN. -STEWBALL? 647 00:37:28,942 --> 00:37:31,292 -MOLL? -DO YOU HAVE A GUN IN THERE? 648 00:37:31,336 --> 00:37:33,903 -IT'S NOT LOADED. [ Scoffs ] -IT'S NOT LOADED. 649 00:37:36,863 --> 00:37:38,473 -I NEED SOME COVERS. -YOU KNOW, WHY IS IT IF I DRINK 650 00:37:38,517 --> 00:37:40,867 OUT OF A STYROFOAM CUP... YOU GIVE ME A TWO-HOUR LECTURE, 651 00:37:40,910 --> 00:37:43,173 B-BUT TRAVIS BICKEL MOVES IN WITH US... 652 00:37:43,217 --> 00:37:45,611 WITH A SEMIAUTOMATIC WEAPON, AND IT'S OKAY? 653 00:37:45,654 --> 00:37:47,874 CHILL OUT. THIS IS NEW YORK. WOMEN CARRY GUNS 654 00:37:47,917 --> 00:37:50,137 IN THEIR PURSES. MOST PEOPLE HAVE THEM IN THEIR 655 00:37:50,180 --> 00:37:53,836 NIGHTSTANDS. JIMMY, IF A LITTLE UNLOADED GUN 656 00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:56,883 -MAKES HIM FEEL BETTER-- [ Scoffs ] -MAKES HIM FEEL BETTER? 657 00:37:56,926 --> 00:37:59,668 MAYBE CLIMBING A TOWER... AND SHOOTING STUDENT NURSES 658 00:37:59,712 --> 00:38:01,714 WOULD MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER. [ Sighs ] 659 00:38:01,757 --> 00:38:02,976 GEEZ! 660 00:38:34,094 --> 00:38:36,357 OKAY, NOW, THIS MIGHT SOUND 661 00:38:36,401 --> 00:38:38,707 LIKE A STUPID QUESTION, DO YOU HAVE A FLIGHT TODAY? 662 00:38:38,751 --> 00:38:40,361 BUT WHERE IS JULIE'S PENIS? [Parents Continue Indistinct] 663 00:38:40,405 --> 00:38:41,928 I MEAN, IS IT IN THE TUB, MAYBE? 664 00:38:41,971 --> 00:38:44,974 DID SHE BREAK IT OFF? [ Child's Voice ] NO PENIS. 665 00:38:45,018 --> 00:38:47,107 OH, IT'S OKAY. [ Chuckling ] HE WANTS TO KNOW 666 00:38:47,150 --> 00:38:50,763 -WHY JULIE DOESN'T HAVE A PENIS. -WHAT? 667 00:38:50,806 --> 00:38:54,723 -YOU HAVE TO TELL HIM ABOUT GIRLS AND BOYS. -NOT AT THIS AGE, HONEY. 668 00:38:54,767 --> 00:38:58,379 -NO, I MEAN, JUST TELL HIM WHY WE'RE DIFFERENT. -NO, YOU DO IT. I TOLD HIM 669 00:38:58,423 --> 00:39:04,254 -ABOUT THE POTTY BIT. -ALL RIGHT. TAKE JULIE. GO SEE DADDY. GO SEE DADDY. 670 00:39:04,298 --> 00:39:09,042 MIKEY, JULIE IS A GIRL, AND YOU ARE A BOY, OKAY? 671 00:39:09,085 --> 00:39:13,089 LITTLE BOYS HAVE PENISES, BUT GIRLS DON'T HAVE THEM BECAUSE THEY DON'T NEED 672 00:39:13,133 --> 00:39:16,789 THEM. IT'S LIKE MOMMY-- MOMMY IS A GIRL, 673 00:39:16,832 --> 00:39:19,879 -SO I DON'T HAVE A PENIS. -BUT SHE'S GOT SOME SET OF BALLS. 674 00:39:21,837 --> 00:39:28,235 -BUT DADDY IS A BIG-- -PENIS! -THAT'S RIGHT! 675 00:39:28,278 --> 00:39:34,894 -HERE WE GO. WHAT'S THAT? -HMM. A PENIS. 676 00:39:37,462 --> 00:39:41,074 -THIS ONE? -NO PENIS. -THAT'S GOOD! 677 00:39:41,117 --> 00:39:48,473 -HE UNDERSTANDS. WHAT'S THIS? HMM. TOUGH CALL. 678 00:39:48,516 --> 00:39:52,738 OH, BOY, WAS THAT STUPID, OR WHAT? IT WAS VERY STUPID. 679 00:39:52,781 --> 00:39:57,090 I THINK I'M GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK. IT'S VERY--YOU SEE, AT 680 00:39:57,133 --> 00:39:59,919 THIS AGE, PEOPLE HAVE A TENDENCY 681 00:39:59,962 --> 00:40:02,835 TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK. YOU CAN DO THAT. YOU JUST GO UP AND DOWN. 682 00:40:02,878 --> 00:40:05,315 BUT EVENTUALLY, YOU HAVE A HEART ATTACK, AND YOU-- 683 00:40:05,359 --> 00:40:07,448 JUMP UP AND DOWN LIKE THAT, AND DON'T FORGET TO 684 00:40:07,492 --> 00:40:09,842 BREATHE. DON'T FORGET TO BREATHE! A LOT OF TIMES, PEOPLE 685 00:40:09,885 --> 00:40:11,800 JUST DROP DEAD HERE, AND YOU SAY, 686 00:40:11,844 --> 00:40:14,803 "WHAT HAPPENED?" "I FORGOT TO BREATHE. I WASN'T BREATHING." 687 00:40:14,847 --> 00:40:16,544 JUMP! JUMP UP AND DOWN. YOU TWO, LIKE THAT. FINE. 688 00:40:19,721 --> 00:40:22,724 YOU LIKE THIS HOUSE, DON'T YOU ? YES, IT'S A VERY GOOD HOUSE. 689 00:40:22,768 --> 00:40:24,813 IS IT JUST ME, OR IS THIS GUY REALLY WEIRD ? 690 00:40:24,857 --> 00:40:27,468 YOU JUST RIPPED MY FACE OFF. 691 00:40:27,512 --> 00:40:29,688 SHE RIPS MY FACE OFF, AND YOU PUNCH ME. 692 00:40:29,731 --> 00:40:32,473 OH, I'VE NEVER HAD SO MUCH FUN IN MY LIFE ! 693 00:40:32,517 --> 00:40:35,781 YO, EDDIE, CHECK OUT THE BLONDE ON THE MONKEY BARS ! YOU CAN SEE RIGHT UP HER DRESS 694 00:40:35,824 --> 00:40:39,001 [ Laughing ] YEAH, MAN, THAT'S SHEILA. WE PLAYED DOCTOR TOGETHER 695 00:40:39,045 --> 00:40:41,743 -PLAYED DOC... WHERE ? -RIGHT OVER THERE, MAN, 696 00:40:41,787 --> 00:40:44,703 -BEHIND THAT BEANBAG THING. -YOU DOG ! 697 00:40:44,746 --> 00:40:46,835 GOTTA MAKE ANOTHER HOUSE CALL. 698 00:40:46,879 --> 00:40:50,448 HMM. EDDIE GETS ALL THE GIRLS. HE'S NOT WEARIN' A DIAPER. 699 00:40:50,491 --> 00:40:52,580 HMM. EDDIE GETS ALL THE GIRLS. HE'S NOT WEARIN' A DIAPER. 700 00:40:52,624 --> 00:40:55,322 MAYBE I OUGHT TO GIVE THIS POTTY THING A TRY. 701 00:40:55,365 --> 00:40:58,151 ♪ WHEN YOU HAVE TO PEE YOU JUMP UP AND DOWN 702 00:40:58,194 --> 00:41:01,371 ♪ BUT SOMETIMES NOTHING HAS TO COME OUT 703 00:41:01,415 --> 00:41:05,071 ♪ SO YOU TRY TO JUMP UP AND DOWN A LITTLE MORE ♪ 704 00:41:06,159 --> 00:41:08,901 AND I DON'T HAVE TO PEE. 705 00:41:09,728 --> 00:41:12,382 I DON'T HAVE TO PEE. 706 00:41:12,426 --> 00:41:16,822 I DO HAVE TO PEE AND I BETTER GO SOMEWHERE. 707 00:41:16,865 --> 00:41:19,999 HERE I GO. OKAY. NOW'S THE TIME. I JUST... 708 00:41:23,568 --> 00:41:25,352 THAT STUFF REALLY SNEAKS UP ON YA. 709 00:41:25,395 --> 00:41:26,309 [ Chuckles ] 710 00:41:34,709 --> 00:41:38,539 HEY, I WANT A BALL OF KRAFT CARAMEL PIECES. 711 00:41:38,583 --> 00:41:41,586 [TV] INTRODUCING WWF WRESTLING BUDDIES, 712 00:41:41,629 --> 00:41:43,936 THE ROUGH AND READY WRESTLERS FROM TONKA ! 713 00:41:43,979 --> 00:41:47,592 WWF WRESTLING BUDDIES BY TONKA ? I WANT ONE OF THOSE ! 714 00:41:47,635 --> 00:41:49,419 HERE COMES THE NEW COBRA HAMMERHEAD ! 715 00:41:49,463 --> 00:41:51,552 THE COBRA HAMMERHEAD WILL SINK THOSE JOES ! 716 00:41:51,596 --> 00:41:54,337 WOW ! I NEED A COBRA HAMMERHEAD! 717 00:41:54,381 --> 00:41:56,557 HEY, I WANT A COBRA "CAMERAHEAD." 718 00:41:56,601 --> 00:41:59,255 IT'S FOR BOYS. GEEZ. 719 00:41:59,299 --> 00:42:02,345 -HEY, PRISCILLA. -HI, ELVIS. 720 00:42:05,174 --> 00:42:08,830 -MIKEY, GUESS WHAT I GOT YOU, BOY? -A COBRA HAMMERHEAD ? 721 00:42:08,874 --> 00:42:11,180 -AN AIRPLANE ! -OH, MAN. 722 00:42:11,224 --> 00:42:13,661 THAT'S A LEAR 24, JUST LIKE YOUR DAD FLIES. 723 00:42:13,705 --> 00:42:15,750 YOU KNOW, ONE DAY I'LL TAKE YOU OUT TO THE AIRPORT 724 00:42:15,794 --> 00:42:16,969 YOU CAN SIT RIGHT UP HERE WITH ME. 725 00:42:17,012 --> 00:42:18,318 -YOU WANNA DO THAT ? -NO. 726 00:42:20,059 --> 00:42:22,278 MAN, I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE INSULTED. 727 00:42:24,846 --> 00:42:26,674 I GET UP FOR THIS JOB INTERVIEW THIS MORNING, RIGHT? 728 00:42:26,718 --> 00:42:28,328 EVERYTHING IS GOIN' GREAT. 729 00:42:28,371 --> 00:42:32,419 -IT'S FOR THIS LIBERAL-TYPE ORGANIZATION, RIGHT ? -WHICH ONE? 730 00:42:32,462 --> 00:42:36,728 I DON'T KNOW. THE AMERICAN FOUNDATION OF CRYBABIES OR SOME SHIT. 731 00:42:36,771 --> 00:42:39,600 HE TELLS ME THE SALARY, AND I WANTED TO KICK HIS ASS. 732 00:42:39,644 --> 00:42:41,297 WHO DOES HE THINK HE'S TALKIN' TO, THIS GUY ? 733 00:42:41,341 --> 00:42:43,473 STU, HONEY, ARE YOU HUNGRY? 734 00:42:43,517 --> 00:42:45,650 NO, I'M GONNA CHECK OUT THE FASTER PUSSYCATS IN THE VILLAGE. 735 00:42:45,693 --> 00:42:47,695 OH, THAT'LL BE FUN FOR YOU. 736 00:42:47,739 --> 00:42:50,568 -YOU THINK I COULD BORROW $20 ? -SURE. 737 00:42:50,611 --> 00:42:55,181 -HEY, STUART, NICE JACKET. -HEY, DO YOU MIND ? 738 00:42:55,224 --> 00:42:57,662 -I GOT A DATE. -I GUESS NOT. 739 00:42:57,705 --> 00:43:00,882 OKAY. HERE YOU ARE. AND I WANT YOU TO TAKE THIS. THIS IS SOME MAD MONEY. 740 00:43:00,926 --> 00:43:04,538 JUST TAKE IT. I DON'T WANT TO TAKE THE SUBWAY, SO HERE. 741 00:43:04,582 --> 00:43:06,322 THERE'S A LOT OF WEIRDOS, THERE. YOU TAKE A CAB. 742 00:43:06,366 --> 00:43:09,195 -THERE'S A LOT OF WEIRDOS? -YEAH. TAKE A CAB. BYE, HONEY. 743 00:43:11,197 --> 00:43:15,636 YOU KNOW, I DON'T MIND THAT EVERY JOB INTERVIEW HE GOES ON HE GETS UPSET. 744 00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:18,944 IT DOESN'T REALLY BOTHER ME THAT HE TAKES MY CLOTHES WITHOUT ASKING. 745 00:43:18,987 --> 00:43:21,468 I CAN EVEN PUT UP WITH HIS FASCIST POINT OF VIEW. 746 00:43:21,511 --> 00:43:22,730 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT BOTHERS ME ? 747 00:43:22,774 --> 00:43:25,254 YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY TICKS ME OFF ? 748 00:43:25,298 --> 00:43:28,954 IS THIS AND THIS. HE DRINKS EVERYTHING BUT A DROP 749 00:43:28,997 --> 00:43:31,434 AND PUTS IT BACK. HE TAKES BITES OUT OF EVERYTHING 750 00:43:31,478 --> 00:43:34,829 AND THEN HE PUTS IT BACK. HE READS OUR NEWSPAPERS, OUR MAGAZINES, HIDES THEM 751 00:43:34,873 --> 00:43:36,396 BEFORE WE GET A CHANCE TO READ THEM ! 752 00:43:36,439 --> 00:43:39,094 -I'LL HAVE A TALK WITH HIM. -NO, NO TALK. 753 00:43:39,138 --> 00:43:40,879 -I WANT HIM OUT OF HERE. -HE DOESN'T HAVE ANYPLACE TO GO. 754 00:43:40,922 --> 00:43:43,446 -SEND HIM TO YOUR MOTHER'S HOUSE. -NO, THEY'D KILL EACH OTHER. 755 00:43:43,490 --> 00:43:45,666 MOLLIE, WHY DO YOU PUT HIM AHEAD OF ME ? 756 00:43:45,710 --> 00:43:49,757 -I DON'T ! -YOU DO ! JUST DECIDE, HIM OR ME. 757 00:43:49,801 --> 00:43:53,456 THAT'S NOT FAIR! YOU CAN'T ASK ME TO CHOOSE BETWEEN YOU AND MY FAMILY. 758 00:43:53,500 --> 00:43:55,807 HE'S STILL YOUR FAMILY AT YOUR MOTHER'S HOUSE. 759 00:43:55,850 --> 00:43:57,896 I'M NOT GONNA KICK HIM OUT, AND YOU KNOW WHAT? 760 00:43:57,939 --> 00:44:00,550 -I REALLY HATE YOU FOR ASKING ME TO DO THIS. -YOU HATE ME ? 761 00:44:00,594 --> 00:44:02,727 YES, I THINK THAT YOU ARE BEING MEAN AND SELFISH. 762 00:44:02,770 --> 00:44:04,903 -I THINK YOU'RE INCONSIDERATE AND STUBBORN. 763 00:44:04,946 --> 00:44:06,731 -OH, YEAH ? -YEAH. 764 00:44:06,774 --> 00:44:09,559 -I THINK YOU ARE A BIG, STUPID SLOB. -YOU'RE JUST BIG AND STUPID. 765 00:44:09,603 --> 00:44:12,432 OKAY, I MAY BE BIG, BUT I AM NOT STUPID ! 766 00:44:12,475 --> 00:44:15,740 -SO, YOU JUST GET OUT OF HERE! -I PAY HALF THE RENT HERE, BABY! 767 00:44:15,783 --> 00:44:17,350 WELL, I PAY ALL THE UTILITIES ! 768 00:44:17,393 --> 00:44:21,920 FINE ! ELVIS IS LEAVING THE BUILDING ! 769 00:44:23,008 --> 00:44:23,791 [ Door Slams Shut ] 770 00:44:26,315 --> 00:44:28,883 HEY, I DON'T WANT HIM TO GO. 771 00:44:28,927 --> 00:44:32,365 -WHAT HAPPENED ? -OH, YEAH ? CHASE MY DADDY AWAY, 772 00:44:32,408 --> 00:44:35,281 I'LL SHOW YOU A THING OR TWO. HERE. HERE. GO AHEAD. 773 00:44:35,324 --> 00:44:37,675 HEY, THAT'S MINE ! [ Mikey Continues Grumbling ] 774 00:44:37,718 --> 00:44:40,199 ALL THE YELLIN' AND SCREAMIN' ALL THE TIME ? 775 00:44:40,242 --> 00:44:42,027 HERE'S WHAT I THINK OF YOUR FRIEND HERE. 776 00:44:42,070 --> 00:44:44,594 OH, NO ! 777 00:44:44,638 --> 00:44:47,554 HOW'S THAT ? BYE-BYE, BIRDIE. 778 00:44:47,597 --> 00:44:51,036 THINK YOU'RE A BIRD, HUH? LET'S SEE IF YOU CAN FLY NOW ! 779 00:44:51,079 --> 00:44:53,647 [ Growls ] OH, MY FRIEND ! 780 00:44:53,691 --> 00:44:58,434 YOU HURT MY FRIEND ! [ Sobbing ] YOU CREEP ! 781 00:45:06,486 --> 00:45:10,446 ♪ [ Elvis Presley ] ARE YOU LONESOME TONIGHT 782 00:45:11,447 --> 00:45:15,669 ♪ DO YOU MISS ME TONIGHT 783 00:45:15,713 --> 00:45:18,541 ♪ ARE YOU SORRY 784 00:45:18,585 --> 00:45:22,197 ♪ WE DRIFTED APART 785 00:45:25,461 --> 00:45:29,117 ♪ DOES YOUR MEMORY STRAY 786 00:45:30,379 --> 00:45:33,861 ♪ TO A BRIGHTER SUMMER DAY 787 00:45:34,993 --> 00:45:37,691 ♪ WHEN I KISSED YOU 788 00:45:37,735 --> 00:45:41,521 ♪ AND CALLED YOU SWEETHEART 789 00:45:44,263 --> 00:45:48,354 ♪ DO THE CHAIRS IN YOUR PARLOR 790 00:45:49,703 --> 00:45:54,055 ♪ SEEM EMPTY AND BARE 791 00:45:54,099 --> 00:45:58,843 ♪ DO YOU GAZE AT YOUR DOORSTEP 792 00:45:58,886 --> 00:46:02,281 ♪ AND PICTURE ME THERE 793 00:46:03,630 --> 00:46:08,243 ♪ IS YOUR HEART FILLED WITH PAIN 794 00:46:08,287 --> 00:46:13,248 ♪ SHALL I COME BACK AGAIN 795 00:46:13,292 --> 00:46:19,689 ♪ TELL ME, DEAR ARE YOU LONESOME TONIGHT ♪ 796 00:46:19,733 --> 00:46:20,778 [ Knocking ] 797 00:46:23,650 --> 00:46:26,044 -MOLLIE ? -WHO IS IT ? -IT'S ME, RONA. 798 00:46:28,698 --> 00:46:31,701 -HI, HON. -DO YOU MIND IF I STAY HERE FOR THE NIGHT ? 799 00:46:31,745 --> 00:46:34,922 I'M TOO SCARED TO GO BACK TO MY APARTMENT. I WAS ROBBED. 800 00:46:34,966 --> 00:46:37,446 WELL, OF COURSE YOU CAN STAY. WHAT HAPPENED ? 801 00:46:37,490 --> 00:46:39,927 I WENT TO PUT THE KEY IN THE DOOR, 802 00:46:39,971 --> 00:46:43,061 AND I SAW IT WAS A LITTLE OPEN. SO I PEEKED MY HEAD IN, 803 00:46:43,104 --> 00:46:44,845 AND THE WHOLE PLACE IS WRECKED. 804 00:46:44,889 --> 00:46:47,630 -OH, GOD, WHAT'D THEY GET? -EVERYTHING. THEY GOT MY TELEPHONE, 805 00:46:47,674 --> 00:46:52,461 MY STEREO, MY CAMERA. THEY GOT MY GRANDFATHER'S GOLD WATCH. THAT POCKET WATCH. 806 00:46:52,505 --> 00:46:54,681 -OH, HON. -THEY GOT ALL MY COSTUME JEWELRY, 807 00:46:54,724 --> 00:46:57,205 AND SOME OF THAT STUFF WAS REALLY EXPENSIVE. 808 00:46:57,249 --> 00:47:00,295 BUT THE WORST THING IS THE MESS: EVERYTHING THROWN AROUND, 809 00:47:00,339 --> 00:47:02,167 JUST WHEN I WAS GETTING ORGANIZED. 810 00:47:02,210 --> 00:47:06,867 -HELP ! FREEZE ! [ Screams ] -STUART, PUT THE GUN DOWN. 811 00:47:06,911 --> 00:47:12,830 -RONA, THIS IS MY BROTHER, STUART. -HI. WHAT A SURPRISE. 812 00:47:12,873 --> 00:47:14,832 MOLLIE NEVER SAID SHE HAD A BROTHER. 813 00:47:14,875 --> 00:47:16,659 -HEY, I'M SORRY FOR AIMING THIS THING AT YOU. 814 00:47:16,703 --> 00:47:20,533 THAT'S OKAY. NO ONE WAS KILLED. 815 00:47:20,576 --> 00:47:23,449 COME ON, YOU CAN STAY IN MY ROOM TONIGHT. 816 00:47:23,492 --> 00:47:26,713 OKAY. UM-- IT WAS NICE MEETING YOU. 817 00:47:26,756 --> 00:47:30,412 -MOLLIE SAID SOME WONDERFUL THINGS ABOUT YOU. -OH, YEAH ? 818 00:47:41,206 --> 00:47:43,164 LOOK, I'M NOT GONNA TELL YOU AGAIN. 819 00:47:43,208 --> 00:47:45,993 -YOU MOVE ! -NO, YOU SHOVE OVER. THIS IS MY SIDE. 820 00:47:46,037 --> 00:47:47,821 GET OVER ON YOUR SIDE. OOHH. [ Mikey ] WHAT, ARE YOU 821 00:47:47,865 --> 00:47:49,518 OOHH. 822 00:47:49,562 --> 00:47:51,956 [ Mikey ] WHAT, ARE YOU AFRAID YOU'RE GONNA GET RECOGNIZED ? 823 00:47:51,999 --> 00:47:55,437 -BITCHIN' WHEELS. -YEAH, EXCEPT I GOTTA RIDE BESIDE HER. 824 00:47:55,481 --> 00:47:58,353 -HERE, BUZZ OFF. -GET YOUR FINGER OUTTA MY EYE ! 825 00:47:58,397 --> 00:48:01,617 -YOU GOT A SISTER ? -HUH-UH. -SO MUCH THE BETTER FOR YOU. 826 00:48:01,661 --> 00:48:03,489 YOUR MOM TELLS 'EM TO BE GOOD, THEY DON'T. 827 00:48:03,532 --> 00:48:05,708 THEY JUST POKE YOU IN THE EYE. 828 00:48:05,752 --> 00:48:08,624 WORSE, THEY... TRY AND STAY WITH ME WHEN I'M TALKIN' TO YOU. 829 00:48:08,668 --> 00:48:12,106 -UH-HUH. -WHAT I'M SAYIN' IS, YOUR PARENTS COMPLETELY 830 00:48:12,150 --> 00:48:15,893 -FORGET ABOUT YOU. -NO, DUDE. DON'T SAY THAT. 831 00:48:15,936 --> 00:48:18,373 YEAH, WELL, THE WAY IT'S GOIN'. SEE YA LATER. 832 00:48:18,417 --> 00:48:19,548 I GOTTA BAIL, DUDE. 833 00:48:21,768 --> 00:48:24,118 [ Quacking ] MOMMY IS SO FUNNY. 834 00:48:24,162 --> 00:48:26,773 SHE'S ALWAYS DOING SOMETHING SO INVENTIVE. 835 00:48:26,816 --> 00:48:30,037 SHE'S THE GREATEST. SHE'S SO CLEVER. 836 00:48:30,081 --> 00:48:33,214 IMAGINE, USING YOUR HAND AND TURNING IT INTO A DUCK. 837 00:48:33,258 --> 00:48:36,261 [ Laughing ] [ Mikey Laughing Mockingly ] 838 00:48:36,304 --> 00:48:38,350 SURE, SURE. LAUGH NOW. 839 00:48:38,393 --> 00:48:40,178 WAIT TILL THEY TAKE OUT THAT BIG SHARP THING 840 00:48:40,221 --> 00:48:43,703 AND START STICKING YOU WITH IT. HUH ? 841 00:48:43,746 --> 00:48:46,358 I HOPE THEY DON'T STICK ME WITH ANYTHING TODAY. 842 00:48:46,401 --> 00:48:49,013 SHE'LL PROBABLY BE A LITTLE KNOCKED OUT FROM THE SHOT, 843 00:48:49,056 --> 00:48:51,363 SO NO DRIVING OR OPERATING HEAVY MACHINERY, HUH ? 844 00:48:51,406 --> 00:48:53,452 I'M ONLY ONE AND I KNOW THAT'S NOT FUNNY. 845 00:48:54,627 --> 00:48:56,368 WHAT'S THAT ? 846 00:48:56,411 --> 00:48:58,805 OH, GOD. I CAN'T WATCH THIS PART. 847 00:48:58,848 --> 00:49:03,375 OH... MY... GOD ! [ Crying ] 848 00:49:03,418 --> 00:49:06,117 SO IT HURTS, DOES IT ? HMM ? HURTS JUST A LITTLE ? 849 00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:09,076 [ Crying Continues ] WILL THIS PAIN EVER GO AWAY ? 850 00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:11,513 MAYBE IT WILL, MAYBE IT WON'T. 851 00:49:15,778 --> 00:49:17,780 HEY, LOOK AT THIS. 852 00:49:17,824 --> 00:49:21,088 LOOK WHAT I'M DOIN'. I'M WALKIN'. I'M-- 853 00:49:21,132 --> 00:49:24,352 [ Grunts ] OH, MY TUSH HURTS. 854 00:49:24,396 --> 00:49:27,399 HEY, MY FRIEND'S BACK. 855 00:49:27,442 --> 00:49:31,925 [ Toy Squeaks ] OH. NOW I REMEMBER. 856 00:49:33,405 --> 00:49:35,929 HE KILLED MY FRIEND. 857 00:49:37,191 --> 00:49:40,020 AS GOD IS MY WITNESS, 858 00:49:40,064 --> 00:49:43,197 I'M GOING TO LEARN TO WALK AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE. 859 00:49:46,331 --> 00:49:48,724 HEY, MIKE, WHAT DO YOU SAY WE SEE A MOVIE ? 860 00:49:48,768 --> 00:49:51,379 WHAT DO YOU SAY YOU CARRY ME AROUND TOWN FOR ONCE, INSTEAD OF HER, DAD ? 861 00:49:51,423 --> 00:49:53,773 [ Laughing ] YEAH, BITE MY TEETHING RING. 862 00:49:53,816 --> 00:49:57,429 ALL RIGHT. WE GOT SCHWARZENEGGER, AND WE GOT BETTY BOOP. 863 00:49:57,472 --> 00:50:01,650 OH, TOUGH CALL. THEY'RE BOTH REALLY BUILT. THEY BOTH TALK FUNNY. 864 00:50:01,694 --> 00:50:03,522 WELL, WHAT WOULD ARNOLD SAY IF HE WERE HERE ? 865 00:50:03,565 --> 00:50:05,306 [ Imitating Arnold ] HE'D SAY, "DO IT. WHY DON'T YOU DO IT ? 866 00:50:05,350 --> 00:50:08,701 YOU ARE HERE. SEE MY MOVIE." I DON'T KNOW, ARNOLD. 867 00:50:08,744 --> 00:50:10,311 I THINK THEY'RE A LITTLE YOUNG FOR YOUR MOVIE, DON'T YOU? 868 00:50:10,355 --> 00:50:12,574 YEAH, HE SAYS WE'RE TOO YOUNG. 869 00:50:12,618 --> 00:50:14,968 -ALL RIGHT. -OH, MAN. DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE GONNA PULL THE... 870 00:50:15,012 --> 00:50:18,406 "SIR, MY KID LEFT HER SHOE INSIDE, CAN I GO GET IT ?" GAG. 871 00:50:18,450 --> 00:50:21,888 -OKAY. COME ON. -HE'S NOT GONNA GO FOR IT. 872 00:50:21,931 --> 00:50:25,413 -SIR, MY KID LEFT HER SHOE INSIDE. CAN WE GET IT ? -YEAH. 873 00:50:25,457 --> 00:50:28,634 -THANKS. -OKAY, I GUESS HE WENT FOR IT. 874 00:50:28,677 --> 00:50:31,941 MIKE, HERE. REMEMBER YOUR OBNOXIOUS ROUTINE, OKAY ? 875 00:50:31,985 --> 00:50:34,161 REMEMBER IT ? I LIVE FOR IT. 876 00:50:34,205 --> 00:50:36,946 -SAY, "POPCORN, POPCORN." -POPCORN, POPCORN, POPCORN ! 877 00:50:36,990 --> 00:50:40,124 -CAN I HELP YOU ? -YEAH, THE KIDS KNOCKED OVER THE POPCORN 878 00:50:40,167 --> 00:50:43,040 -IN THE THEATER. -POPCORN, POPCORN, POPCORN! 879 00:50:43,083 --> 00:50:44,954 POPCORN, POPCORN ! ALL RIGHT. CALM DOWN. JUST A MINUTE. 880 00:50:44,998 --> 00:50:48,306 [ Chuckles ] HEY, I CAN BE OBNOXIOUS TOO. 881 00:50:48,349 --> 00:50:53,093 POPCORN, POPCORN ! [ Whining ] 882 00:50:53,137 --> 00:50:56,227 [ Crying ] -POPCORN, POPCORN ! -OKAY. JUST GO. 883 00:50:56,270 --> 00:50:57,228 [Whining, Crying Continue] OH, NO. REALLY ? 884 00:50:57,271 --> 00:50:59,839 -YOU'RE GREAT. THANKS. -OH, YEAH. 885 00:50:59,882 --> 00:51:01,667 -THANKS A LOT. -IT'S ALL RIGHT. IT'S OKAY. 886 00:51:01,710 --> 00:51:02,929 ALWAYS WORKS. 887 00:51:02,972 --> 00:51:05,062 [ James ] LOOK, YOU GUYS. 888 00:51:05,105 --> 00:51:07,629 YOU KNOW I'LL BE HOME SOON. BUT IT'S JUST YOUR MOTHER. 889 00:51:07,673 --> 00:51:09,327 IF SHE DOESN'T STOP BOSSING ME AROUND, 890 00:51:09,370 --> 00:51:11,633 I'LL NEVER BE A GOOD DAD, RIGHT ? 891 00:51:11,677 --> 00:51:14,854 I KNOW THAT ICE CREAM DOESN'T MAKE UP FOR ME NOT BEING HOME. 892 00:51:14,897 --> 00:51:17,770 YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW. BUT IT'S A GOOD START. 893 00:51:17,813 --> 00:51:20,077 [ Voice Cracking ] I MISS YOU KIDS SO MUCH. 894 00:51:24,255 --> 00:51:27,649 PLEASE DON'T BE MAD AT ME, WHATEVER SHE SAYS, OKAY ? 895 00:51:30,261 --> 00:51:33,307 AND, REMEMBER, THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU GUYS, ALL RIGHT ? 896 00:51:33,351 --> 00:51:36,049 IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, AND IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. 897 00:51:36,093 --> 00:51:38,269 I THINK IT IS HIS FAULT. 898 00:51:38,312 --> 00:51:42,969 -YEAH, WELL, I THINK IT'S YOUR FAULT. -ME? YOU'RE THE BAD ONE. 899 00:51:43,012 --> 00:51:46,581 -I MISS YOU SO MUCH. -OH, POP ! 900 00:51:46,625 --> 00:51:48,714 -DO YOU MISS ME ? -YEAH. 901 00:51:48,757 --> 00:51:53,806 ICK. MALE BONDING MAKES ME SICK. 902 00:51:53,849 --> 00:51:59,464 -SHE NEEDS TO BE CHANGED. -HI ! -OH. THERE YOU GO, MIKE. 903 00:51:59,507 --> 00:52:03,294 JIMMY, HAVE YOU GIVEN ANY MORE THOUGHT TO WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT ? 904 00:52:03,337 --> 00:52:06,166 ♪ -WHAT ? ABOUT ME BEING A BIG, STUPID SLOB ? - I GOT A SPOON, UH 905 00:52:06,210 --> 00:52:09,474 ♪ I GOT A PLATE, UH, WE'RE GONNA BOOM-A-BOOM-A-BOOM-BOOM ♪ 906 00:52:09,517 --> 00:52:12,129 -NO, NOT ABOUT THAT. -THE PART ABOUT MY BEING MEAN AND SELFISH AND 907 00:52:12,172 --> 00:52:14,479 YOU WANTING ME OUT OF THE HOUSE? 908 00:52:14,522 --> 00:52:16,263 I'M SORRY ! I JUST GOT UPSET BECAUSE I DIDN'T THINK YOU APPRECIATED 909 00:52:16,307 --> 00:52:18,309 ME GETTING YOU THAT J... MIKEY, STOP IT ! 910 00:52:18,352 --> 00:52:20,789 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT ! I'LL DO IT SOFT. 911 00:52:20,833 --> 00:52:23,444 ♪ I GOT A SPOON YOU KNOW, I'M NOT ONE OF THE KIDS. ♪ 912 00:52:23,488 --> 00:52:26,317 -I CAN DO THINGS FOR MYSELF. -OH, YEAH, LIKE BECOMING 913 00:52:26,360 --> 00:52:28,536 AN AIRLINE PILOT WHEN YOU ONLY FLY TWO HOURS A WEEK ? 914 00:52:28,580 --> 00:52:31,496 -IT'LL TAKE YOU TILL YOU'RE 50. -FOR YOUR INFORMATION, 915 00:52:31,539 --> 00:52:34,890 ♪ I GOT MYSELF A JOB. I GOT A PLATE, UH WE GOTTA BOOM-BIDDY-- ♪ 916 00:52:34,934 --> 00:52:38,198 -KNOCK IT OFF ! -KNOCK IT OFF ! -WHOA ! 917 00:52:38,242 --> 00:52:41,332 WHY'D THEY DO THAT ? HE WAS JUST WORKING HIS PLATE. 918 00:53:03,832 --> 00:53:08,010 ♪ I WAS DREAMIN' OF THE PAST 919 00:53:11,144 --> 00:53:14,800 ♪ AND MY HEART WAS BEATING FAST 920 00:53:18,020 --> 00:53:21,372 ♪ I BEGAN TO LOSE CONTROL 921 00:53:25,202 --> 00:53:29,118 ♪ I BEGAN TO LOSE CONTROL 922 00:53:32,296 --> 00:53:35,429 ♪ I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOU 923 00:53:38,606 --> 00:53:44,656 ♪ I'M SORRY THAT I MADE YOU CRY 924 00:53:44,699 --> 00:53:49,922 ♪ OH, NOW I DIDN'T WANT TO HURT YOU 925 00:53:53,752 --> 00:53:55,754 ♪ I'M JUST A JEALOUS GUY 926 00:53:59,192 --> 00:54:02,717 ♪ I WAS FEELIN' INSECURE 927 00:54:06,199 --> 00:54:09,289 ♪ YOU MIGHT NOT LOVE ME ANYMORE 928 00:54:14,033 --> 00:54:17,166 ♪ I WAS SHIVERING INSIDE 929 00:54:20,996 --> 00:54:25,305 ♪ I WAS SHIVERING INSIDE 930 00:54:27,002 --> 00:54:31,703 ♪ OH, I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOU 931 00:54:34,880 --> 00:54:42,061 ♪ I'M SORRY THAT I MADE YOU CRY OH, NOW 932 00:54:42,104 --> 00:54:45,978 ♪ I DIDN'T WANT TO HURT YOU 933 00:54:48,937 --> 00:54:52,550 ♪ I'M JUST A JEALOUS GUY 934 00:54:52,593 --> 00:54:56,031 ♪ WATCH OUT I'M JUST A JEALOUS GUY LOOK OUT ♪ 935 00:54:56,075 --> 00:54:59,992 I'M SORRY, JULIE. [ Kisses ] 936 00:55:01,123 --> 00:55:03,038 'NIGHT, BABY. [ Kisses ] 937 00:55:09,654 --> 00:55:12,787 [ Rona Giggling ] [ Sighs ] [ Whispered Chattering] 938 00:55:19,881 --> 00:55:22,188 [ Stuart ] I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU CAN... 939 00:55:22,231 --> 00:55:24,233 [ Both Laughing ] I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT. 940 00:55:24,277 --> 00:55:28,325 LISTEN. [ Laughing Continues ] 941 00:55:28,368 --> 00:55:31,502 SO I SAID TO THIS GUY, "WHAT ARE YOU, SOME KIND OF IDIOT ?" 942 00:55:31,545 --> 00:55:32,938 [ Rona ] OH, COME ON. 943 00:55:32,981 --> 00:55:34,243 I DID. -I SAID, "FILE SCHEDULE C." -FILE SCHEDULE C. 944 00:55:34,287 --> 00:55:35,723 THAT'S RIGHT. [ Laughing Continues ] 945 00:55:38,944 --> 00:55:41,599 YOU WOULD, HUH ? I WOULD WHAT ? 946 00:55:41,642 --> 00:55:45,037 FILE SCHEDULE C. YEAH, I WOULD. [ Chuckles ] 947 00:55:57,919 --> 00:56:01,270 OKAY, I CAN DO IT HOLDIN' ON. 948 00:56:01,314 --> 00:56:05,187 BUT I WONDER IF I CAN MAKE IT ALL THE WAY TO THE COUCH. 949 00:56:05,231 --> 00:56:07,625 ALL RIGHT. HERE GOES NOTHIN'. 950 00:56:14,936 --> 00:56:17,852 YEAH, I'M DOIN' IT. I'M DOIN' IT. 951 00:56:21,029 --> 00:56:26,557 -I'M GETTIN' THERE. YES ! [ Gasps ] -YOU WALKED ! 952 00:56:26,600 --> 00:56:29,211 I DID IT ! I MADE IT ! I WALKED ! 953 00:56:33,215 --> 00:56:39,439 HONEY, YOU WALKED ! YOU WALKED ! STUART ! YOU WALKED ! 954 00:56:39,483 --> 00:56:41,963 JAMES ! JULIE... 955 00:56:47,621 --> 00:56:49,580 [ Rona ] JIMMY CALLED. HE'S GONNA PICK UP THE KIDS TOMORROW. 956 00:56:49,623 --> 00:56:52,583 [ Mollie ] DID HE ASK TO TALK TO ME AT ALL ? 957 00:56:52,626 --> 00:56:54,889 WELL, IT'S ONLY BEEN A COUPLE OF DAYS. 958 00:56:54,933 --> 00:56:59,851 -FINE, FINE. LET'S WORK. -I GOT A SPOUSE WHO WANTS TO MAKE A CONTRIBUTION 959 00:56:59,894 --> 00:57:02,767 INTO AN IRA ACCOUNT, AND HER HUSBAND'S COVERED BY A PENSION PLAN. 960 00:57:02,810 --> 00:57:04,943 YOU'D LOSE A $2,000 DEDUCTION. 961 00:57:06,379 --> 00:57:08,947 I ACTUALLY THINK YOU'RE JUST BEING LAZY. 962 00:57:08,990 --> 00:57:11,602 YOU NEED TO DO A SEPARATE AND A JOINT RETURN AND SEE WHICH ONE TURNS OUT BEST. 963 00:57:11,645 --> 00:57:15,388 -I KNOW. -I KNOW YOU KNOW. -I KNOW YOU KNOW I KNOW. 964 00:57:15,432 --> 00:57:18,783 GET A LOAD OF THIS ASSHOLE HERE. HE'S A TEACHER, RIGHT ? 965 00:57:18,826 --> 00:57:22,003 SO HE FIGURES THAT HIS CHAIR AND HIS DESK ARE ONE-FOURTH. 966 00:57:22,047 --> 00:57:25,311 OF HIS SIX-ROOM APARTMENT. 967 00:57:25,354 --> 00:57:29,402 SO HE DEDUCTS ONE-TWENTY FOURTH OF HIS RESIDENCE AS WORK SPACE. 968 00:57:29,446 --> 00:57:31,448 STUART, YOU CAN'T DO THAT. 969 00:57:31,491 --> 00:57:32,753 -HE CAN DO IT. -IT'S ONLY ONE-TWENTY FOURTH, WHO'S GONNA CARE? 970 00:57:32,797 --> 00:57:34,755 FIRST OF ALL, HE HAS A CLASSROOM, 971 00:57:34,799 --> 00:57:38,498 AND HIS SCHOOL HAS A TEACHER'S LOUNGE. THAT'S EMPLOYER-PROVIDED WORKSPACE. 972 00:57:38,542 --> 00:57:40,500 -YOU CAN'T DEDUCT THAT. -YOU'RE TOO STRICT. 973 00:57:40,544 --> 00:57:42,502 -YOU COULD GET AWAY WITH IT. -YOU WANNA BE A CRIMINAL ? GOOD. 974 00:57:42,546 --> 00:57:45,462 [ Laughing ] WHAT IS WRONG, DOLL ? 975 00:57:45,505 --> 00:57:48,160 LOOK AT US. IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT AT 10:00, 976 00:57:48,203 --> 00:57:50,205 AND WE'RE HERE WITH OUR 1040s. 977 00:57:50,249 --> 00:57:54,122 -[ Together ] IT'S TAX SEASON. -I DON'T CARE. WE SHOULD BE OUT, HAVING FUN. 978 00:57:54,166 --> 00:57:58,083 HEY, THIS IS FUN. [ Scoffs ] 979 00:57:58,126 --> 00:58:00,694 -I KNOW WHAT'S WRONG. -NO, YOU DON'T. -I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. 980 00:58:00,738 --> 00:58:02,870 OKAY, WHAT AM I THINKING ? 981 00:58:02,914 --> 00:58:04,785 YOU'RE THINKING ''WHAT'S JIMMY DOING? HE'S OUT THERE HAVING A BALL.'' 982 00:58:04,829 --> 00:58:08,093 [ Scoffs ] YEAH, "BALL" BEING THE OPERATIVE WORD. 983 00:58:08,136 --> 00:58:12,793 MOLLIE, COME ON. HE'S PROBABLY ON HIS SISTER'S COUCH WATCHING TV. 984 00:58:12,837 --> 00:58:15,361 -HE'S PROBABLY GETTING LAID. -OH, STUART ! -THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 985 00:58:15,404 --> 00:58:16,841 THAT'S JUST WHAT I NEED TO HEAR. 986 00:58:16,884 --> 00:58:18,103 MR. WONDERFUL, MY BROTHER. 987 00:58:18,146 --> 00:58:19,974 -IT WAS JUST A PHYSICAL THING. -JUST WORK. 988 00:58:22,803 --> 00:58:25,719 -HEY, RONA. LET'S GO AND GET SOMETHING TO EAT. -OKAY, LET'S GO. 989 00:58:31,464 --> 00:58:32,987 ♪ [ Rock ] LAST NIGHT A LITTLE DANCER 990 00:58:33,031 --> 00:58:37,339 ♪ CAME DANCING TO MY DOOR 991 00:58:37,383 --> 00:58:41,735 ♪ LAST NIGHT A LITTLE ANGEL CAME PUMPIN' ON THE FLOOR ♪ 992 00:58:41,779 --> 00:58:43,998 [ Laughing ] [ Giggling ] 993 00:58:44,042 --> 00:58:47,393 WHOA, THIS IS GREAT. MY WIFE WOULD NEVER LET ME DRIVE WITH THE TOP DOWN. 994 00:58:47,436 --> 00:58:49,700 SHE'D TELL ME "IT WOULD CAUSE SKIN CANCER." 995 00:58:49,743 --> 00:58:51,179 AND SHE'D SAY THESE WOULD CAUSE EMPHYSEMA. 996 00:58:51,223 --> 00:58:52,920 AND THIS WOULD CAUSE LIVER DISEASE. 997 00:58:54,574 --> 00:58:56,533 ♪ BECAUSE IN THE MIDNIGHT HOUR 998 00:58:56,576 --> 00:58:58,535 ♪ OH, MAN ! SHE CRIED MORE, MORE, MORE 999 00:58:58,578 --> 00:59:02,016 ♪ [ Woman Screaming ] WITH A REBEL YELL 1000 00:59:02,060 --> 00:59:03,540 ♪ [ Yelling ] SHE CRIED MORE, MORE, MORE ♪ 1001 00:59:03,583 --> 00:59:07,021 [ Horn Honking ] WHOA ! WHAT A RUSH ! [ Giggling ] 1002 00:59:07,065 --> 00:59:10,242 OH, MAN ! MY WIFE WOULD HAVE HATED THAT. 1003 00:59:10,285 --> 00:59:13,898 HOW DULL ! I MEAN, YOU HAVE TO HAVE SOME FUN IN LIFE! 1004 00:59:13,941 --> 00:59:16,509 YOU KNOW WHAT HER IDEA OF LIVING DANGEROUSLY WOULD BE? 1005 00:59:16,553 --> 00:59:18,729 FORGETTING ONE OF HER VITAMINS. [ Giggles ] 1006 00:59:18,772 --> 00:59:22,907 WHAT A SNAIL ! HEY, LET'S GO GET SOME PORK. 1007 00:59:22,950 --> 00:59:27,128 ♪ WITH A REBEL YELL MORE, MORE, MORE ♪ 1008 00:59:31,393 --> 00:59:35,006 [Children Chatter, Shout] -YOU OKAY? -YEAH. I'M FINE. 1009 00:59:35,049 --> 00:59:38,052 I JUST WISH JAMES WOULD GET HERE SO I CAN GO TO WORK ALREADY. 1010 00:59:38,096 --> 00:59:40,577 OKAY, YOU LITTLE BRAT, LET GO OF HER HEAD ! 1011 00:59:40,620 --> 00:59:42,840 LET GO. JUST, JUST-- HEY ! 1012 00:59:42,883 --> 00:59:45,669 EVERYBODY IN THE CIRCLE. EVERYBODY IN THE CIRCLE. JUST... GET IN THE CIRCLE. 1013 00:59:45,712 --> 00:59:48,062 [ Screams ] GET IN THE CIRCLE. 1014 00:59:48,106 --> 00:59:51,849 JUST, EVERYBODY TOGETHER. JUST, WHO AM I TALKING TO HERE ? 1015 00:59:51,892 --> 00:59:55,243 NOW, EDDIE, RUN THIS POTTY THING BY ME ONE MORE TIME. 1016 00:59:55,287 --> 00:59:58,072 IT'S SIMPLE. YOU GOTTA TAKE CONTROL OF THE SITUATION. 1017 00:59:58,116 --> 01:00:01,815 -HOW YOU DO THAT ? -YOU GOTTA SAY, "HEY, YO, PEE-PEE. 1018 01:00:01,859 --> 01:00:04,949 I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, BUT YOU'RE NOT COMIN' OUT TILL I SAY SO." 1019 01:00:04,992 --> 01:00:08,561 -THE PEE-PEES JUST LISTEN TO YOU ? -SOMETIMES THEY DO, 1020 01:00:08,605 --> 01:00:12,521 SOMETIMES THEY DON'T, BUT THAT'S WHAT THE GROWNUPS ARE THERE FOR. 1021 01:00:12,565 --> 01:00:15,481 HEY, BUSTER. WHAT ARE YOU DOING ? [ Mutters ] 1022 01:00:15,524 --> 01:00:19,485 -HEY, JOEY, NEED SOME HELP? -GET IN A CIRCLE. INDIANS DANCE IN A CIRCLE. 1023 01:00:19,528 --> 01:00:21,356 HEY! 1024 01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:24,403 HELP ME. JEWS AND ITALIANS ALL DANCE IN CIRCLES. 1025 01:00:24,446 --> 01:00:27,580 COME, KIDS. HELP ME. HELP ME HERE. DO THAT STEP WE DO. 1026 01:00:29,582 --> 01:00:30,627 DO THIS, KIDS! 1027 01:00:37,068 --> 01:00:39,984 GOOD! ALL RIGHT. 1028 01:00:40,027 --> 01:00:42,639 -ELVIS! ELVIS! -OOH, ELVIS, MY MAN! 1029 01:00:42,682 --> 01:00:45,119 COME ON! DANCE, DANCE, DANCE. COME ON! 1030 01:00:45,163 --> 01:00:47,600 DAMNIT, I'LL SLAP YOU. DANCE! 1031 01:00:47,644 --> 01:00:50,647 DANCE! HEY! TWIST, TWIST! 1032 01:00:52,561 --> 01:00:53,475 COME ON, TWIST! 1033 01:00:56,740 --> 01:00:59,046 -FOLLOW ME! -FOLLOW HIM! FOLLOW HIM! HERE, I'LL GIVE YA A DOLLAR. FOLLOW! 1034 01:01:20,241 --> 01:01:23,636 COME ON, SHOW OFF, GET OUT OF HERE! 1035 01:01:42,655 --> 01:01:47,094 OH, ARE YOU KIDDING? I'M HAVING A STROKE. OH, BOY! 1036 01:02:01,718 --> 01:02:04,285 HEY COME HERE, ELVIS, I'M YOUR KID, NOT THEM! 1037 01:02:04,329 --> 01:02:08,855 YOU HIT ME! YOU HIT ME. HEY, MOLLY. SEE YOU LATER. 1038 01:02:14,861 --> 01:02:17,472 WHAT'S WITH HIM? HE ACTS LIKE I DON'T EVEN EXIST. 1039 01:02:18,386 --> 01:02:19,561 I DON'T GET IT. 1040 01:02:20,867 --> 01:02:22,086 AM I LOSING IT? 1041 01:02:27,482 --> 01:02:30,485 OH MAN, JULIE. IF WE'RE GOING TO GET YOUR DADDY BACK... 1042 01:02:30,529 --> 01:02:32,879 WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO DO SOME SERIOUS PACKAGING. 1043 01:02:34,620 --> 01:02:36,100 ARE YOU WITH ME, KID? 1044 01:02:36,143 --> 01:02:38,537 YEAH! LET'S DRESS UP FOR DADDY! 1045 01:02:38,580 --> 01:02:42,846 ♪ WHEN I HAVE A BRAND NEW HAIRDO 1046 01:02:42,889 --> 01:02:47,894 [LAUGHING] ♪ WITH MY EYELASHES ALL IN CURL 1047 01:02:47,938 --> 01:02:52,420 ♪ I FLOAT AS THE CLOUDS ON AIR DO 1048 01:02:52,464 --> 01:02:57,208 ♪ I ENJOY BEING A GIRL 1049 01:02:57,251 --> 01:03:01,821 ♪ I FLIP WHEN A FELLOW SENDS ME FLOWERS 1050 01:03:01,865 --> 01:03:06,652 ♪ I DROOL OVER DRESSES MADE OF LACE 1051 01:03:06,695 --> 01:03:11,091 ♪ I TALK ON THE TELEPHONE FOR HOURS 1052 01:03:11,135 --> 01:03:15,879 ♪ WITH A POUND AND A HALF OF CREAM UPON MY FACE 1053 01:03:15,922 --> 01:03:20,927 ♪ I'M STRICTLY A FEMALE FEMALE 1054 01:03:20,971 --> 01:03:25,802 ♪ AND MY FUTURE I HOPE WILL BE 1055 01:03:25,845 --> 01:03:30,110 ♪ IN THE HOME OF A BRAVE AND FREE MALE 1056 01:03:30,154 --> 01:03:36,203 ♪ WHO ENJOYS BEING A GUY 1057 01:03:36,247 --> 01:03:43,297 ♪ HAVING A GIRL LIKE ME 1058 01:03:45,996 --> 01:03:48,737 -GEE, HI! -HEY, RONA! YOU LOOK GOOD. -THANKS, DOLL. 1059 01:03:48,781 --> 01:03:51,566 ALL RIGHT, BIG BOY. I'LL SEE YOU. 1060 01:03:51,610 --> 01:03:53,220 -NO NO, WHERE ARE YOU GOING? DON'T GO. -I GOTTA GO! 1061 01:03:53,264 --> 01:03:55,266 NO, MOLLY WANTS TO TALK TO YOU. 1062 01:03:55,309 --> 01:03:58,182 -FOR WHAT? -COME ON, OH, JIMMY, JUST TALK TO HER, COME ON. BE NICE. 1063 01:04:00,880 --> 01:04:03,404 OH, HI! 1064 01:04:03,448 --> 01:04:05,885 HAVE YOU SEEN MY SUNGLASSES ANYWHERE? 1065 01:04:05,929 --> 01:04:09,715 JIMMY, DON'T YOU THINK WE SHOULD TRY AND WORK OUT SOME OF YOUR PROBLEMS? 1066 01:04:09,758 --> 01:04:12,457 WHAT PROBLEMS? THE BIGGEST PROBLEM I GOT IS SQUINTING MY EYES ALL DAY. 1067 01:04:12,500 --> 01:04:14,894 DON'T YOU EVEN MISS THIS? 1068 01:04:14,938 --> 01:04:17,984 OOH, CALLING OUT THE HEAVY ARTILLERY, HUH? 1069 01:04:18,028 --> 01:04:20,378 -GOD, DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO BE SUCH A PUTZ? -OH, PIPE DOWN. 1070 01:04:23,033 --> 01:04:25,513 HMM, MAYBE THIS IS A GOOD OPPORTUNITY FOR ME TO TRY WHAT EDDIE SAID. 1071 01:04:25,557 --> 01:04:27,994 I THINK I'LL JUST HAVE A TALK WITH MY PEE-PEE. 1072 01:04:28,038 --> 01:04:29,909 I'M GETTING READY TO GO TO THE POTTY, SO DON'T COME OUT. 1073 01:04:31,476 --> 01:04:34,044 HMM! I CAN STILL FEEL THEM IN THERE. 1074 01:04:34,087 --> 01:04:37,569 BUT MAYBE IT'S WORKING. MAYBE EDDIE WAS RIGHT! 1075 01:04:37,612 --> 01:04:38,787 OKAY. LET'S SEE IF I CAN MAKE IT. 1076 01:04:40,964 --> 01:04:44,706 I CAN STILL FEEL 'EM. MAYBE THEY'RE LISTENING TO ME. 1077 01:04:44,750 --> 01:04:47,927 OKAY, DON'T COME OUT, DON'T COME OUT! 1078 01:04:47,971 --> 01:04:50,712 OOH, IT'S GETTING A LITTLE TOUGHER NOW. 1079 01:04:50,756 --> 01:04:52,192 DON'T COME OUT, I'M ALMOST THERE. 1080 01:04:53,280 --> 01:04:55,804 OOH! I MIGHT MAKE IT. 1081 01:04:55,848 --> 01:05:00,418 DON'T COME OUT! OOH, HAD TO PINCH THAT ONE BACK. YEAH. 1082 01:05:00,461 --> 01:05:02,289 OKAY DON'T COME OUT, DON'T COME OUT. 1083 01:05:02,333 --> 01:05:06,337 MIGHT MAKE IT! IF I COULD JUST GET THESE DARN PANTS DOWN. 1084 01:05:06,380 --> 01:05:08,513 OH, WAIT A MINUTE, HOLD IT... 1085 01:05:10,776 --> 01:05:15,563 [GROANS WITH RELIEF] [HALLELUJAH CHORUS PLAYING] 1086 01:05:17,043 --> 01:05:21,743 MOMMY, DADDY! MOMMY, DADDY! 1087 01:05:21,787 --> 01:05:27,010 -HUH? WHAT? -WHAT IS THAT? WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM? 1088 01:05:27,053 --> 01:05:31,884 -OH! HONEY! -OH! MIKE, YOU DID IT! YOU DID IT, BOY. I'M SO... 1089 01:05:31,928 --> 01:05:34,321 WAIT A MINUTE WAIT A MINUTE I'M NOT DONE! 1090 01:05:34,365 --> 01:05:36,976 MIKEY WENT PEE-PEE IN THE POTTY! 1091 01:05:37,020 --> 01:05:40,545 [SINGING] PEE-PEE IN THE POTTY! PEE-PEE IN THE POTTY! 1092 01:05:43,983 --> 01:05:47,378 ISN'T IT GREAT, SWEETIE? YOUR BROTHER WENT PEE-PEE! 1093 01:05:47,421 --> 01:05:50,120 BIG DEAL. I MADE A DOODEY. 1094 01:05:50,163 --> 01:05:53,906 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS, WHAT A BIG BOY! GOOD BOY! 1095 01:05:53,950 --> 01:05:56,778 I HAVEN'T FELT THIS GOOD SINCE THE DAY HE WAS BORN. 1096 01:05:56,822 --> 01:05:59,303 I KNOW, IT'S SO WEIRD, IT'S BETTER THAN MONEY, IT'S BETTER THAN AIRPLANES, ITS... 1097 01:05:59,346 --> 01:06:01,609 IT'S BETTER THAN SEX! 1098 01:06:01,653 --> 01:06:03,263 WELL, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT, BUT... 1099 01:06:06,005 --> 01:06:08,268 YOU HUNGRY? 1100 01:06:08,312 --> 01:06:10,749 -NO, I GOTTA GO. -I COULD FIX YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT. 1101 01:06:10,792 --> 01:06:12,838 I GOT A NINE O'CLOCK FLIGHT. 1102 01:06:12,881 --> 01:06:15,014 BUT IT'S POURING OUT! 1103 01:06:15,058 --> 01:06:17,234 WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY. IT'S BETTER TO BE UP IN THE AIR POURING 1104 01:06:17,277 --> 01:06:19,149 THAN IT IS ON THE GROUND ON THE HIGHWAY IN A CAR! 1105 01:06:19,192 --> 01:06:21,586 WELL, WHOEVER SAID THAT THE HIGHWAY WAS SAFE? 1106 01:06:21,629 --> 01:06:24,284 I MEAN, EVERY YEAR THERE'S 200,000 FATALITIES RELATED TO THE RAIN, AND... 1107 01:06:37,428 --> 01:06:38,907 WANT SOME CHICKEN? 1108 01:06:38,951 --> 01:06:41,519 I DON'T KNOW, IT DEPENDS ON HOW IT TURNS OUT. 1109 01:06:41,562 --> 01:06:44,739 OKAY SO WHAT DO YOU NEED? PAPRIKA, VEGETABLES, WHAT... 1110 01:06:48,743 --> 01:06:51,485 GET ME WHATEVER YOU WANT. HEY, MOLLY. DO YOU WANT SOME CHICKEN? 1111 01:06:51,529 --> 01:06:53,835 UM, NO THANKS, HONEY, I DON'T EAT MEAT. 1112 01:06:53,879 --> 01:06:59,058 ...HAVOC IN FIVE STATES. THE FORECAST CALLS FOR INCREASED WINDS.... 1113 01:06:59,102 --> 01:07:03,541 THAT'S IT. I HAVE TO TALK TO JIMMY, THIS IS CRAZY. 1114 01:07:08,502 --> 01:07:11,114 HI, THIS IS MOLLIE RIALCO. COULD I SPEAK TO MY HUSBAND JAMES? 1115 01:07:11,157 --> 01:07:14,073 -HE'S ON THE FIELD. -OH HE IS? -YEAH. 1116 01:07:14,117 --> 01:07:16,162 -OH HAS HE TAXIED OUT YET? -NOT YET. 1117 01:07:16,206 --> 01:07:18,338 OH GOOD. COULD YOU HAVE SOMEBODY GO OUT THERE AND GET HIM FOR ME PLEASE? 1118 01:07:18,382 --> 01:07:21,646 -IT'S AN EMERGENCY. -NO. 1119 01:07:21,689 --> 01:07:24,997 -DO YOU THINK YOU COULD REACH HIM ON HIS PHONE? -NO. 1120 01:07:25,041 --> 01:07:29,828 -ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. SO WHAT TERMINAL IS HE IN? -AIRBORNE EXPRESS TERMINAL. 1121 01:07:29,871 --> 01:07:32,091 -OKAY, GOT IT. WHAT RAMP? -WHAT DO I KNOW? YOU'LL HAVE TO COME IN AND ASK. 1122 01:07:32,135 --> 01:07:33,614 OKAY. THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 1123 01:07:33,658 --> 01:07:37,314 STEWART, I'VE GOT TO GO GET JAMES. 1124 01:07:37,357 --> 01:07:39,707 YOU FEED THE KIDS THEIR DINNER, ALL RIGHT? 1125 01:07:39,751 --> 01:07:42,014 AND DO NOT GIVE THEM ANY DIET COKE LIKE YOU DID LAST TIME. 1126 01:08:18,746 --> 01:08:22,010 WAIT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT, WAIT A MINUTE, HOLD IT! 1127 01:08:22,054 --> 01:08:24,839 ...NEW YORK CENTER, ONE THREE FIVE POINT NINE. 1128 01:08:26,450 --> 01:08:28,582 MOLLIE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1129 01:08:28,626 --> 01:08:30,497 I TOLD THEM THAT THERE WAS A FAMILY EMERGENCY. 1130 01:08:30,541 --> 01:08:32,630 -MOLLIE, YOU SHOULDN'T BE HERE. -NO, JIMMY, YOU'RE THE ONE 1131 01:08:32,673 --> 01:08:35,154 -WHO SHOULDN'T BE HERE. IT'S TOO DANGEROUS TO FLY TONIGHT. -OH, MOLLIE, I'VE TOLD YOU A 1132 01:08:35,198 --> 01:08:37,417 MILLION TIMES. WE FLY AROUND THE WEATHER. 1133 01:08:37,461 --> 01:08:40,725 THAT'S JUST IT! YOU CAN'T FLY AROUND IT THIS TIME. IT'S LIKE WALL-TO-WALL STORMS OUT THERE. 1134 01:08:40,768 --> 01:08:42,553 DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO THE NEWS? 1135 01:08:42,596 --> 01:08:45,077 -HONEY, THE NEWS ALWAYS UPSETS YOU. -ALL RIGHT, FORGET THE NEWS. 1136 01:08:45,121 --> 01:08:48,776 LET'S JUST SAY THAT I HAVE THIS GUT FEELING THAT YOU SHOULDN'T BE UP THERE! 1137 01:08:48,820 --> 01:08:51,257 WELL WE DON'T NEED YOUR GUT FEELING, WE'VE GO SOPHISTICATED INSTRUMENTS 1138 01:08:51,301 --> 01:08:53,607 THAT TELL ME EXACTLY WHERE I CAN GO AND WHERE I CAN'T GO. 1139 01:08:53,651 --> 01:08:56,349 NOW I GOT MY CLEARANCE, AND I'M LEAVING. SO WOULD YOU PLEASE GO? 1140 01:08:56,393 --> 01:08:58,395 -I'M NOT LEAVING THIS PLANE WITHOUT YOU. -MOLLIE, GET OUT. 1141 01:08:58,438 --> 01:09:00,962 -I'M NOT LEAVING. -GET OUT! -NO! 1142 01:09:01,006 --> 01:09:03,617 FOUR SEVEN PAPA, DUE TO ADVERSE WEATHER CONDITIONS, WE'RE CANCELING ALL FLIGHTS 1143 01:09:03,661 --> 01:09:06,011 UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE. DO YOU READ ME, FOUR SEVEN PAPA? 1144 01:09:08,448 --> 01:09:11,799 OKAY THAT'S FOUR SEVEN PAPA. YOU CAN CANCEL OUR FLIGHT PLAN. 1145 01:09:11,843 --> 01:09:13,497 ROGER, FOUR SEVEN PAPA. 1146 01:09:13,540 --> 01:09:16,195 SO. I GUESS THIS TIME YOUR FEELING IS RIGHT, HUH? 1147 01:09:17,240 --> 01:09:17,979 DOES IT MAKE YOU HAPPY? 1148 01:09:19,546 --> 01:09:21,635 JIMMY... 1149 01:09:21,679 --> 01:09:26,074 I LOVE YOU. I DON'T CARE ANYMORE IF I'M RIGHT OR WRONG. 1150 01:09:26,118 --> 01:09:29,948 [LAUGHS] YOU DO TOO, YOU LIAR. 1151 01:09:29,991 --> 01:09:34,779 WELL, I SORT OF LIKE BEING RIGHT. BUT I DO LOVE YOU. 1152 01:09:38,478 --> 01:09:39,827 I LOVE YOU TOO. 1153 01:09:54,625 --> 01:09:56,409 AUUUGH BOOSH! 1154 01:09:56,453 --> 01:09:58,411 I GOT YOU! 1155 01:09:59,543 --> 01:10:01,893 BOMBS AWAY! 1156 01:10:01,936 --> 01:10:06,376 A LITTLE NAPALM OUGHTTA SLOW YOU DOWN, COLONEL! 1157 01:10:06,419 --> 01:10:09,074 THANK GOD THEY LEFT ME WITH A RESPONSIBLE ADULT. 1158 01:10:20,128 --> 01:10:22,609 -CHAAAARGE! I GOT YOU! -OH NO! 1159 01:10:22,653 --> 01:10:25,917 YOU ARE MY PRISONER! 1160 01:10:25,960 --> 01:10:29,268 OKAY! I GIVE UP! I SURRENDER! 1161 01:10:29,312 --> 01:10:31,836 YEAH? HOW ABOUT A LITTLE SQUIRT IN THE NOSTRIL? 1162 01:10:34,491 --> 01:10:37,494 THIS AIN'T OVER. THIS AIN'T OVER. 1163 01:10:37,537 --> 01:10:39,757 I'LL GET MY TROOPS TOGETHER, AND WE'LL BE BACK. 1164 01:10:56,034 --> 01:10:58,123 MIKEY, WATCH JULIE, OKAY? 1165 01:10:59,994 --> 01:11:02,040 WHY, IS SHE GONNA DO SOMETHING BESIDES SLOBBER? 1166 01:11:11,658 --> 01:11:13,312 AUUUGH! FREEZE! OKAY. 1167 01:11:13,356 --> 01:11:15,706 OKAY. PUT THE BAG DOWN. 1168 01:11:15,749 --> 01:11:17,751 SLOW, AND NOBODY'S GOING TO GET HURT. 1169 01:11:17,795 --> 01:11:19,057 PUT THE BAG DOWN. 1170 01:11:32,026 --> 01:11:33,941 HEY! STOP! 1171 01:11:57,704 --> 01:12:01,491 -MM, THE KIDS ARE GOING TO BE SO EXCITED. -WHO'S TAKING CARE OF THEM? 1172 01:12:01,534 --> 01:12:03,667 -STEWART. -STEWART? 1173 01:12:03,710 --> 01:12:06,583 -AW, NO. WHAT ARE YA, NUTS? -DON'T WORRY, EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE ALL RIGHT! 1174 01:12:10,674 --> 01:12:12,980 HOLY COW! 1175 01:12:13,024 --> 01:12:15,374 OKAY, STAY CALM, JUST GO GET UNCLE STEWART. 1176 01:12:15,418 --> 01:12:17,942 UNCLE STEWART! UNCLE STEWART! 1177 01:12:19,247 --> 01:12:21,249 OH, GREAT! 1178 01:12:22,425 --> 01:12:25,079 HEY! SOMEBODY STOP THAT GUY! 1179 01:12:32,478 --> 01:12:35,655 -HEY! WHERE'S MOMMY? -COME ON, JULIE! 1180 01:12:35,699 --> 01:12:37,744 I DON'T KNOW WHERE UNCLE STEWART IS, BUT WE GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE! 1181 01:12:37,788 --> 01:12:39,964 THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH HOT STUFF! 1182 01:12:40,007 --> 01:12:42,445 MIKEY, THIS STUFF IS SCARY! 1183 01:12:42,488 --> 01:12:46,492 -IT'S OKAY, JULIE. -I'M AFRAID! -I'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU. 1184 01:12:46,536 --> 01:12:49,060 I DON'T KNOW WHERE THAT BONEHEAD UNCLE STEWART IS. 1185 01:12:49,103 --> 01:12:52,106 -NOW JUST KEEP YOUR HANDS IN, JULIE. DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING! -MIKEY, IT'S HOT! 1186 01:13:07,208 --> 01:13:10,081 HEY, WHAT WAS THAT FOR? 1187 01:13:10,124 --> 01:13:12,866 -WELL WHAT DID YOU WANT ME TO DO, LET HIM KILL YOU? -OH WHAT ARE TALKING ABOUT? 1188 01:13:12,910 --> 01:13:14,564 STEWART, WHERE ARE THE KIDS? 1189 01:13:14,607 --> 01:13:16,566 THEY'RE UPSTAIRS. 1190 01:13:16,609 --> 01:13:18,959 [GASPS] OH MY GOD! 1191 01:13:22,441 --> 01:13:23,529 I'LL TAKE THE STAIRS. 1192 01:13:26,140 --> 01:13:30,406 OKAY HERE WE GO, I THINK WE'RE SAFE. 1193 01:13:30,449 --> 01:13:32,843 -WHOA, THAT WAS CLOSE. -HOW DID YOU GET DOWN HERE? 1194 01:13:32,886 --> 01:13:34,453 WE JUST WALKED. 1195 01:13:34,497 --> 01:13:37,108 TECHNICALLY, I WAS PUSHED 1196 01:13:37,151 --> 01:13:39,545 -HONEY, GET HIM OUT AND CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT. -OKAY, COME ON, BABY. 1197 01:13:58,782 --> 01:14:02,089 TURN, THEN PRESS... WHOA! 1198 01:14:11,272 --> 01:14:15,538 YES! YES! 1199 01:14:15,581 --> 01:14:19,498 SO I CHASE HIM ALL THE WAY DOWN UNTIL HE LANDED ON SOME FIRE ESCAPE 1200 01:14:19,542 --> 01:14:23,937 CHASE HIM DOWN THROUGH THIS THING, I JUMP ON THE GUY, AND THEN I SUCKER PUNCHED HIM. 1201 01:14:23,981 --> 01:14:27,332 HE'S AMAZING! ISN'T HE? 1202 01:14:27,375 --> 01:14:30,596 -OH, STEWART, LET'S GET MARRIED! -YEAH! 1203 01:14:30,640 --> 01:14:32,903 ALL YOU GUYS ARE PRETTY LUCKY THE FIRE DIDN'T SPREAD BEYOND THE KITCHEN! 1204 01:14:32,946 --> 01:14:35,514 YEAH WELL THANK GOD I GOT THAT FIRE EXTINGUISHER! 1205 01:14:35,558 --> 01:14:38,299 I WAS THE ONE WHO GOT THE FIR EXTINGUISHER. 1206 01:14:38,343 --> 01:14:40,563 -I GOT THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER! -NO, I GOT THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER. 1207 01:14:40,606 --> 01:14:44,305 WHO LEFT THE KIDS WITH STEWART? THAT WAS A PRETTY BONEHEAD IDEA, HUH? 1208 01:14:45,176 --> 01:14:47,265 OH... YEAH. 1209 01:14:48,048 --> 01:14:50,442 GOOD ANSWER. 1210 01:14:56,056 --> 01:14:59,016 I'M WORRIED ABOUT YOU BARBECUING ALL THE TIME. 1211 01:14:59,059 --> 01:15:01,975 -OH, WILL YOU RELAX? -IT'S REALLY NOT GOOD FOR THE ENVIRONMENT, MOM. 1212 01:15:02,019 --> 01:15:07,677 WE JUST GOT ONE OF THESE BRAND-NEW OUTDOOR ELECTRIC STOVES, AND THEY'RE... 1213 01:15:07,720 --> 01:15:10,549 NO, THEY DON'T DO ANYTHING BAD! 1214 01:15:10,593 --> 01:15:13,596 YOU'VE GOTTEN TO BE SUCH A NUDGE, I DON'T KNOW HOW... 1215 01:15:13,639 --> 01:15:20,298 [INDISTINGUISHABLE BICKERING] 1216 01:15:24,955 --> 01:15:30,830 MIKEY, OKAY. YOU GOT ME OUT OF THE HOT STUFF. I DON'T GET IT. 1217 01:15:30,874 --> 01:15:34,225 WELL NOW, LISTEN. YOU KNOW, HOT STUFF CAN BE VERY BAD FOR YOU. 1218 01:15:34,268 --> 01:15:36,923 IT'S ESPECIALLY NOT GOOD FOR KIDS AT ALL. 1219 01:15:36,967 --> 01:15:38,925 BUT I THOUGHT YOU HATED ME? 1220 01:15:38,969 --> 01:15:41,232 I MEAN, YOU'RE ALWAYS MEAN TO ME AND STUFF. 1221 01:15:41,275 --> 01:15:44,801 YEAH, WELL, I DO HATE YOU A LOT OF THE TIME. 1222 01:15:44,844 --> 01:15:48,413 YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY. YOU BUG ME. YOU POKE ME IN THE EYE. 1223 01:15:48,456 --> 01:15:51,851 BUT YOU'RE MY SISTER. AND ITS MY JOB TO LOVE YOU. 1224 01:15:51,895 --> 01:15:53,940 WE GOTTA STICK TOGETHER. 1225 01:15:53,984 --> 01:15:57,291 THE WAY I SEE IT, THERE'S US, AND THERE'S THEM. 1226 01:15:58,902 --> 01:16:01,861 YEAH, BIG ONES DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE. 1227 01:16:01,905 --> 01:16:04,951 YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT BIG ONES ARE GONNA DO. 1228 01:16:04,995 --> 01:16:08,128 -THAT'S FOR SURE. THAT'S WHY WE HAVE TO STICK TOGETHER. -YEAH! 1229 01:16:09,303 --> 01:16:10,304 YOU AND ME. 1230 01:16:11,305 --> 01:16:12,872 YOU AND ME? 1231 01:16:12,916 --> 01:16:15,527 THAT'S RIGHT. YOU AND ME. 1232 01:16:15,571 --> 01:16:18,269 -WE'RE THE KIDS! -YEAH! 1233 01:16:22,795 --> 01:16:28,584 ["I GOT YOU, BABE" PLAYING] 1234 01:20:34,655 --> 01:20:38,094 OW! OH, MY TUSH HURTS. 101633