All language subtitles for Boston Legal [2x20]

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew Download
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,302 --> 00:00:03,767 Robbery isn't as bad as killing a man, 2 00:00:03,802 --> 00:00:05,447 and you got me off on that. 3 00:00:05,482 --> 00:00:07,783 There are only two get out of jail free cards in the game, 4 00:00:07,818 --> 00:00:09,191 and you've used them both up. 5 00:00:09,226 --> 00:00:10,557 Say hello grandpa. 6 00:00:10,592 --> 00:00:12,079 Hi, paw paw. 7 00:00:12,114 --> 00:00:13,880 Hi. Hello, sweetheart. 8 00:00:13,881 --> 00:00:15,277 Rachel is using again. 9 00:00:15,312 --> 00:00:17,039 I've decided to do an intervention. 10 00:00:17,074 --> 00:00:17,758 And Fiona? 11 00:00:17,759 --> 00:00:19,863 I'll assume custody until Rachel is well. 12 00:00:19,898 --> 00:00:23,325 We always said what a mistake it was for us to get married. 13 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:25,032 Maybe the blunder was splitting up. 14 00:00:25,067 --> 00:00:27,831 You are getting married, and you're kissing another woman. 15 00:00:27,866 --> 00:00:30,297 Not just any woman. I promise. 16 00:00:38,744 --> 00:00:41,874 As a concession for keeping the cottage in cape may, 17 00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:45,004 you're willing to give up the house in Great Barrington. 18 00:00:45,039 --> 00:00:47,668 And the antique pewter valued at over $70,000. 19 00:00:47,703 --> 00:00:50,262 A considerable gesture of goodwill on your part. 20 00:00:50,297 --> 00:00:53,191 However, there's something that Natalie's determined to get her hands on, 21 00:00:53,226 --> 00:00:55,493 and I simply can't permit it... 22 00:00:55,845 --> 00:00:57,669 My Victorian Erotica collection. 23 00:00:57,704 --> 00:00:59,703 Vic... what? 24 00:00:59,704 --> 00:01:00,857 Victorian Erotica. 25 00:01:00,892 --> 00:01:02,340 As I'm sure you're aware, much like today, 26 00:01:02,341 --> 00:01:05,167 the late 1800s were a socially conservative time. 27 00:01:05,202 --> 00:01:06,853 During repressive eras... 28 00:01:06,888 --> 00:01:08,197 Pornography thrives. 29 00:01:08,232 --> 00:01:10,184 We prefer "Erotica". 30 00:01:10,219 --> 00:01:12,378 I'm in possession of the premier collection 31 00:01:12,413 --> 00:01:14,984 of Victorian Erotica in the western hemisphere. 32 00:01:15,019 --> 00:01:17,555 I intend for it to be my legacy to the world. 33 00:01:18,041 --> 00:01:20,489 Um... Just so I'm clear here, 34 00:01:20,524 --> 00:01:23,920 we're talking about literature, photos... 35 00:01:23,955 --> 00:01:24,933 And machinery. 36 00:01:24,968 --> 00:01:25,912 Machinery? 37 00:01:25,947 --> 00:01:29,193 The Victorian Era was the height of the industrial age. 38 00:01:29,228 --> 00:01:32,439 Whenever new technology arrives, its first use is erotica. 39 00:01:32,474 --> 00:01:33,735 Much like the Internet... 40 00:01:33,770 --> 00:01:34,669 and Internet porn. 41 00:01:34,670 --> 00:01:35,320 Erotica. 42 00:01:35,355 --> 00:01:37,876 No, that stuff's just porn. 43 00:01:37,877 --> 00:01:43,224 Um, Clifford, was any of this erotica acquired during your marriage? 44 00:01:45,213 --> 00:01:46,737 All of it, actually. 45 00:01:46,772 --> 00:01:51,987 Well, then legally, Natalie is entitled to a significant portion of the collection. 46 00:01:52,022 --> 00:01:56,301 Shirley, my family's money and affairs has been connected to this firm 47 00:01:56,336 --> 00:02:00,064 since you opened your doors. I want my collection. 48 00:02:00,099 --> 00:02:01,702 You'll never get it, Clifford. 49 00:02:01,737 --> 00:02:04,056 And you must be Natalie. 50 00:02:06,674 --> 00:02:08,424 Shirl. 51 00:02:08,459 --> 00:02:10,175 Ivan? 52 00:02:41,085 --> 00:02:43,028 You don't normally practice family law. 53 00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:44,971 What are you doing on a divorce case? 54 00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:48,198 Professor Cabot's estate has a strong tie to the firm. 55 00:02:48,233 --> 00:02:50,585 He wanted me. And you? 56 00:02:50,620 --> 00:02:52,404 I wanted you. 57 00:02:53,238 --> 00:02:55,167 As a matter of full disclosure, 58 00:02:55,202 --> 00:02:58,403 Mr. Tiggs and I were once married many years ago 59 00:02:58,438 --> 00:03:01,569 and could conceivably present a conflict of tersest. 60 00:03:01,604 --> 00:03:05,952 Either one or both of you would be advised to request change of counsel. 61 00:03:05,987 --> 00:03:07,990 I'm not giving up my attorney. 62 00:03:11,573 --> 00:03:13,965 No takers? Great. 63 00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:16,057 Shall we? 64 00:03:22,780 --> 00:03:24,621 You don't want to tear apart a collection. 65 00:03:24,656 --> 00:03:26,427 That's why it's called "a collection". 66 00:03:26,462 --> 00:03:28,451 If you spent a little less time with the collection, 67 00:03:28,486 --> 00:03:30,016 we might not be here dividing it up now. 68 00:03:30,051 --> 00:03:30,439 People! 69 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,868 Before you met me, you'd never even heard of "The Lusty Turk"... 70 00:03:32,903 --> 00:03:33,253 Clifford... 71 00:03:33,254 --> 00:03:37,394 If not for me, "Two circus Virgins" would be hanging over someone else's fireplace. 72 00:03:37,429 --> 00:03:40,398 Natalie, Clifford, if neither of you can budge on this, 73 00:03:40,433 --> 00:03:44,587 then we will end up in court and a judge will decide your collection's future. 74 00:03:44,622 --> 00:03:45,384 Fine. 75 00:03:45,986 --> 00:03:47,405 Now why don't we take a break and see 76 00:03:47,406 --> 00:03:50,446 if we can come up with a better resolution tomorrow. 77 00:03:50,481 --> 00:03:51,436 That's fine. 78 00:03:51,471 --> 00:03:52,955 I'll be right down. 79 00:03:52,990 --> 00:03:54,359 I'll call you. 80 00:04:01,590 --> 00:04:03,744 I thought they'd never leave. 81 00:04:04,081 --> 00:04:07,420 So how is the missus... missy? 82 00:04:08,262 --> 00:04:10,162 The honeymoon was exceptional. 83 00:04:10,197 --> 00:04:10,933 Guadalupe? 84 00:04:10,934 --> 00:04:14,878 An atrociously dull island. Nothing to do but have sex all day and night. 85 00:04:14,913 --> 00:04:17,817 By the way, Shirley, I'm having an affair. 86 00:04:17,852 --> 00:04:20,187 Huh. Ivan, you do not disappoint. 87 00:04:20,222 --> 00:04:21,722 You've been married four weeks. 88 00:04:21,757 --> 00:04:22,596 Seemed like five. 89 00:04:22,597 --> 00:04:23,977 And whom are you having the affair with? 90 00:04:24,012 --> 00:04:25,988 You. 91 00:04:25,989 --> 00:04:29,163 Well, so far it hasn't been very good for me. 92 00:04:29,198 --> 00:04:32,641 I'm not sure if you follow the morning network news shows, 93 00:04:32,676 --> 00:04:34,353 but I caught a couple on the Island. 94 00:04:34,388 --> 00:04:37,504 And according to the experts, one doesn't have to actually 95 00:04:37,539 --> 00:04:40,620 have a physical relationship to be considered a cheater. 96 00:04:40,655 --> 00:04:41,586 No kidding? 97 00:04:41,621 --> 00:04:42,517 No kidding. 98 00:04:42,518 --> 00:04:45,243 If our friendship... 99 00:04:45,278 --> 00:04:46,931 Let's just call it that... 100 00:04:46,966 --> 00:04:49,470 ils deeper than my primary relationship, 101 00:04:49,505 --> 00:04:52,864 them technically I'm emotionally cheating on my wife. 102 00:04:52,899 --> 00:04:56,288 That's what Katie and Matt say, and they both have such trusting faces. 103 00:04:56,323 --> 00:04:59,706 Besides humor you, what can I do? 104 00:05:01,046 --> 00:05:04,360 Admit you're having an emotional affair with me. 105 00:05:04,395 --> 00:05:07,675 Consider making it physical, since, after all, 106 00:05:07,710 --> 00:05:10,009 we're already halfway there... 107 00:05:10,552 --> 00:05:12,532 And let's call it a day. 108 00:05:12,998 --> 00:05:14,478 I have a better idea, 109 00:05:14,513 --> 00:05:18,914 and I'm sure it's something Katie and Matt came up with as well. 110 00:05:18,949 --> 00:05:21,539 Go home to your wife, Ivan. 111 00:05:21,574 --> 00:05:24,130 Are you breaking up with me? 112 00:05:24,540 --> 00:05:26,779 Go home to your wife. 113 00:05:34,846 --> 00:05:37,447 Shirley, you know I don't play fair. 114 00:05:37,482 --> 00:05:40,879 That's one of the many reasons you love me. 115 00:06:02,936 --> 00:06:04,851 Did you pack my jean nate? 116 00:06:04,886 --> 00:06:06,536 Yes, I packed your jean Nate. 117 00:06:06,571 --> 00:06:08,558 What about my nighttime eye patches? 118 00:06:08,559 --> 00:06:12,205 I can't sleep without my nighttime eye patches. 119 00:06:18,230 --> 00:06:19,864 Evening, Adele. 120 00:06:19,899 --> 00:06:21,498 Step on it! 121 00:06:25,835 --> 00:06:28,106 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait! 122 00:06:28,141 --> 00:06:30,117 Mrs. Piper! 123 00:06:30,152 --> 00:06:32,645 I have warned you before about this. 124 00:06:32,680 --> 00:06:34,581 You leave me no other choice. 125 00:06:34,616 --> 00:06:38,242 Call Boston PD I want her arrested for kidnapping. 126 00:06:38,277 --> 00:06:41,869 Oh, before you do that, dear, could you do one thing? 127 00:06:41,904 --> 00:06:43,172 What? 128 00:06:43,207 --> 00:06:46,275 Call Alan Shore. He's in the book. 129 00:06:47,297 --> 00:06:49,344 Why did you try to kidnap this woman? 130 00:06:49,379 --> 00:06:51,369 She wasn't kidnapping me. 131 00:06:51,404 --> 00:06:52,776 She was helping me escape. 132 00:06:52,811 --> 00:06:53,850 Oh, come on... 133 00:06:53,885 --> 00:06:54,496 Alan... 134 00:06:54,531 --> 00:06:56,661 A crime is being committed here. 135 00:06:56,662 --> 00:06:59,286 Adele is being held prisoner. 136 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,140 Go on. 137 00:07:01,175 --> 00:07:04,317 Adele's been in the hospital suffering from depression. 138 00:07:04,352 --> 00:07:07,459 Her son died recently, and it really devastated her. 139 00:07:07,494 --> 00:07:10,155 Last wee, they took her out of the hospital, 140 00:07:10,190 --> 00:07:14,180 and they brought her here to this so-called "Assisted Living Center". 141 00:07:14,215 --> 00:07:16,427 They put her on antidepressants. 142 00:07:16,462 --> 00:07:18,216 She started feeling better, 143 00:07:18,251 --> 00:07:19,749 and she asked when she could go home. 144 00:07:19,784 --> 00:07:22,671 That's when she found out the court had assigned 145 00:07:22,706 --> 00:07:25,523 a conservator to be in charge of her estate. 146 00:07:25,558 --> 00:07:28,547 Donald Wharton... a man she'd never even heard of. 147 00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:30,948 He has my power of attorney. 148 00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:35,185 He has control of my bank accounts, of my property. 149 00:07:35,220 --> 00:07:37,092 He... he's selling off my assets. 150 00:07:37,127 --> 00:07:41,381 And he is spending all of my money without my permission. 151 00:07:42,081 --> 00:07:45,774 Adele... Do you have any family? 152 00:07:47,378 --> 00:07:49,468 Not since my son passed away. 153 00:07:49,503 --> 00:07:50,926 Catherine... 154 00:07:50,961 --> 00:07:53,534 If you knew this injustice was being done to Adele, 155 00:07:53,569 --> 00:07:56,771 why didn't you simply call me before you attempted to kidnap her? 156 00:07:56,806 --> 00:08:01,640 Well, dear, you... you'd helped me out on those two convenience store robberies, 157 00:08:01,675 --> 00:08:03,910 not to mention the murder. 158 00:08:03,945 --> 00:08:07,304 I didn't want to think I was becoming a bother. 159 00:08:12,796 --> 00:08:16,450 So... one has only to fill out a few forms, 160 00:08:16,485 --> 00:08:18,507 and is then fury licensed by the state? 161 00:08:18,542 --> 00:08:21,790 It's that easy. Now many conservators are perfectly qualified, 162 00:08:21,825 --> 00:08:24,202 but the lesser ones are Akin to the Jackal. 163 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:27,011 They sniff around hospital corridors, 164 00:08:27,046 --> 00:08:30,458 hunting for senior citizens with no family ties. 165 00:08:30,493 --> 00:08:31,613 When they corner one, 166 00:08:31,648 --> 00:08:33,898 the conservator goes before a judge with an emergency motion, 167 00:08:33,933 --> 00:08:37,429 the judge, overburdened with caseloads, quickly grants them a power of attorney, 168 00:08:37,464 --> 00:08:39,976 and suddenly, they sink their teeth into that senior's life. 169 00:08:40,011 --> 00:08:44,063 They seize their assess, strip away all their decision making powers, 170 00:08:44,098 --> 00:08:49,581 then run up charges, feeding off the estates until the bones have been picked clean. 171 00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:52,576 Wow. Aren't people grand? 172 00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:54,881 Alan, what are you eating? 173 00:08:54,916 --> 00:08:58,678 Jamaican ackee. It tastes like scrambled eggs if you cook it. 174 00:08:58,713 --> 00:09:00,405 No, thanks. 175 00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:03,532 How do you want to proceed with Adele's conservator? 176 00:09:03,567 --> 00:09:05,114 Mr. Wharton? 177 00:09:05,149 --> 00:09:08,755 A visit to his den would be a good start. 178 00:09:09,539 --> 00:09:11,109 Hmm, why not? 179 00:09:11,144 --> 00:09:16,443 Avoid the pink parts. They've been known to cause vomiting or death. 180 00:09:25,099 --> 00:09:27,559 The first thing we should talk about is Paul Lewiston. 181 00:09:27,594 --> 00:09:29,665 Let's wait until he gets here. 182 00:09:29,700 --> 00:09:31,593 Well, that's the point. He's not getting here. 183 00:09:31,628 --> 00:09:34,611 His schedule's been a bit shaky since he's taken custody of his granddaughter. 184 00:09:34,646 --> 00:09:35,428 Granddaughter? 185 00:09:35,463 --> 00:09:36,897 Fiona, his daughter Rachel's in... 186 00:09:36,898 --> 00:09:38,525 Oh, right, right, right. The druggie. 187 00:09:38,560 --> 00:09:39,580 She's not a druggie. 188 00:09:39,615 --> 00:09:41,797 She has an addition for which she's receiving treatment. 189 00:09:41,832 --> 00:09:46,372 We don't need Paul. The hell with it. I'll take care of this. What's on his plate? 190 00:09:46,407 --> 00:09:50,912 Uh, to start with, Paul has final interviews for summer associate candidates. 191 00:09:50,947 --> 00:09:52,213 Boring. Next. 192 00:09:52,248 --> 00:09:54,474 Uh, it's almost the first of the month. 193 00:09:54,509 --> 00:09:56,354 Someone needs to meet with the building manager. 194 00:09:56,389 --> 00:09:57,471 I'll take that. 195 00:09:57,506 --> 00:10:00,447 And Sam Wolfson wanted some time this week. 196 00:10:00,482 --> 00:10:03,353 Oh, Sam and I go way back. I'll cover Sam. 197 00:10:03,388 --> 00:10:06,460 Well, folks, there you are. You see? Problem solved. 198 00:10:06,495 --> 00:10:10,233 Denny Crane... Hands on management. 199 00:10:13,252 --> 00:10:15,065 Where's Paul? 200 00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:16,878 Oh, dear God. 201 00:10:18,778 --> 00:10:22,202 My absence at this morning's partnership meeting was unavoidable. 202 00:10:22,237 --> 00:10:24,268 I had to take Fiona to the pediatrician. 203 00:10:24,303 --> 00:10:25,987 Perfectly understandable, Paul. 204 00:10:26,022 --> 00:10:29,951 We're just curious when you'll be returning to work full-time. 205 00:10:31,142 --> 00:10:34,683 Shirley, I have recently become the single parent 206 00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:37,818 to a 3-year-old child who has no one but me to depend on. 207 00:10:37,853 --> 00:10:39,134 Paul, I know it's hard. 208 00:10:39,169 --> 00:10:40,953 No, it's not about being hard. 209 00:10:40,954 --> 00:10:44,129 It's that my priorities are different now. 210 00:10:44,164 --> 00:10:49,473 And suddenly, this firm doesn't seem so important. 211 00:10:49,508 --> 00:10:51,664 Denny Crane... master of the house. 212 00:10:51,699 --> 00:10:53,204 Hello, Denny. How are things? 213 00:10:53,239 --> 00:10:56,326 Couldn't be better. Paul, I heard about your druggie daughter. 214 00:10:56,361 --> 00:10:58,682 I've got things under control now. 215 00:10:58,717 --> 00:11:01,004 Why don't you take the time you need? 216 00:11:01,039 --> 00:11:04,204 Thank you. I intend to. 217 00:11:04,239 --> 00:11:05,927 Shirley. 218 00:11:07,563 --> 00:11:09,703 "Druggie daughter?" 219 00:11:09,738 --> 00:11:11,051 What? 220 00:11:11,086 --> 00:11:13,355 We covered the increased security at the front desk, 221 00:11:13,390 --> 00:11:16,374 and you're going to repair the water damage on the 14th floor. 222 00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:19,570 Da, I take care of Friday if good. 223 00:11:19,605 --> 00:11:20,848 Very good. 224 00:11:22,011 --> 00:11:26,468 What went smoothly. So I guess I'll see you next month. 225 00:11:26,758 --> 00:11:28,260 So... 226 00:11:35,559 --> 00:11:36,665 I'm forgetting something. 227 00:11:36,700 --> 00:11:38,005 Yeah. 228 00:11:38,028 --> 00:11:39,263 Right. Here's the thing... 229 00:11:39,298 --> 00:11:42,014 I don't know what it is I'm forgetting. 230 00:11:42,049 --> 00:11:44,279 E... envelope. 231 00:11:49,412 --> 00:11:50,753 Are you asking me for a bribe? 232 00:11:50,788 --> 00:11:53,423 No! No, no, no, no. 233 00:12:16,852 --> 00:12:19,024 Cretins. 234 00:12:29,545 --> 00:12:30,669 So... 235 00:12:31,057 --> 00:12:32,750 Are you gonna tell me? 236 00:12:34,118 --> 00:12:35,692 Yes, you're zipped. 237 00:12:35,727 --> 00:12:38,051 That's not what I meant. 238 00:12:38,086 --> 00:12:39,050 Denny, do you mind? 239 00:12:39,085 --> 00:12:40,050 Shirley, you're my girl. 240 00:12:40,085 --> 00:12:43,382 I rarely look at people's faces other than my own, 241 00:12:43,417 --> 00:12:46,387 but your pallor was telling me something. 242 00:12:46,422 --> 00:12:48,057 Man trouble? 243 00:12:52,084 --> 00:12:53,825 It's Ivan. 244 00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:56,237 He won't stop until he gets what he wants. 245 00:12:56,272 --> 00:12:57,733 Right now what he wants is me, 246 00:12:57,768 --> 00:13:01,836 and... for once, I don't trust myself with him. 247 00:13:01,871 --> 00:13:05,489 So... why not have an affair with him and get it over with? 248 00:13:05,524 --> 00:13:07,916 And what about his sweet, young wife? 249 00:13:07,951 --> 00:13:09,696 Not to mention my own morals. 250 00:13:09,731 --> 00:13:11,121 Morals. 251 00:13:11,156 --> 00:13:15,993 Invented by the power elite to keep the hoi pollio from enjoying themselves. 252 00:13:16,028 --> 00:13:18,627 As for the wife, either she won't find out 253 00:13:18,662 --> 00:13:21,483 and you'll be fine, or she will and she'll learn. 254 00:13:21,518 --> 00:13:23,544 If he's gonna have an affair with someone, 255 00:13:23,579 --> 00:13:25,928 why not be part of the fun? 256 00:13:26,469 --> 00:13:29,549 Maybe you should write fortune cookies. 257 00:13:29,584 --> 00:13:32,184 And maybe you... 258 00:13:32,219 --> 00:13:35,793 should fantasize about him with someone else. 259 00:13:36,351 --> 00:13:37,100 Good-bye, Denny. 260 00:13:37,135 --> 00:13:39,808 Was that too sublet? I meant me. 261 00:13:53,704 --> 00:13:56,458 Wait out here, Adele. I'll just be a minute. 262 00:13:56,493 --> 00:13:59,536 Catherine, to what do I owe this pleasant surprise? 263 00:13:59,571 --> 00:14:01,543 I heard you were going to see Wharton today. 264 00:14:01,578 --> 00:14:02,744 I'm on my way. 265 00:14:02,745 --> 00:14:07,559 I just wanna warn you, don't be fooled by his silly, cherubic face. 266 00:14:07,594 --> 00:14:11,404 I mean, he fools judges, He fools hospital administrators... 267 00:14:11,439 --> 00:14:13,516 anyone he needs to so he can get his hands 268 00:14:13,551 --> 00:14:15,594 on folk like Adele and her pocketbook. 269 00:14:15,629 --> 00:14:17,004 He's a bad man, Alan. 270 00:14:17,039 --> 00:14:18,380 I'm hardly ever fooled. 271 00:14:18,415 --> 00:14:20,019 Oh, come on. 272 00:14:20,054 --> 00:14:23,068 The first time you met me, I'm sure you had no idea 273 00:14:23,103 --> 00:14:26,082 I'd be capable of killing a man with a frying pan. 274 00:14:26,117 --> 00:14:27,215 Catherine, when I met you, 275 00:14:27,250 --> 00:14:29,662 I was sure you could accomplish anything you set your mind to, 276 00:14:29,697 --> 00:14:31,315 and you've yet to disappoint. 277 00:14:31,350 --> 00:14:35,107 Just so you know, I've asked Jesus not to forgive him. 278 00:14:35,142 --> 00:14:38,530 I think Adele has a very good friend. 279 00:14:38,820 --> 00:14:42,030 Oh, Adele and I are old. If we don't stick up for each other, who will? 280 00:14:42,065 --> 00:14:43,697 Hello, Adele. 281 00:14:44,126 --> 00:14:46,482 Clifford, regarding the collection... 282 00:14:46,517 --> 00:14:48,803 when one is faces with a daunting loss, 283 00:14:48,838 --> 00:14:52,219 one tries to hold tightly to something tangible. 284 00:14:52,254 --> 00:14:55,565 as your attorney and as someone who's been there, 285 00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:58,713 divorce can play some very nasty tricks on your psyche. 286 00:14:58,748 --> 00:15:01,827 So you're asking, is it conceivable I can't let Natalie go? 287 00:15:01,862 --> 00:15:05,383 I'm putting it out there as a possibility. 288 00:15:06,403 --> 00:15:08,318 Given the fact she'd rather spend more time 289 00:15:08,353 --> 00:15:11,494 chairing the women's studies department than be with me, 290 00:15:11,529 --> 00:15:14,321 and that she's the one that asked for the divorce? 291 00:15:14,356 --> 00:15:16,064 Something like that. 292 00:15:16,099 --> 00:15:17,738 The answer is still no. 293 00:15:17,773 --> 00:15:21,292 Shirley, this is my vision. It's not just some collection of smut, 294 00:15:21,327 --> 00:15:23,350 it's an actual window into our history, 295 00:15:23,385 --> 00:15:26,490 a look at how we perceive ourselves and our society 296 00:15:26,525 --> 00:15:30,333 through a lens of our most primary urges. 297 00:15:30,368 --> 00:15:35,080 I even had this artist's rendering done for a museum I'd like to start. 298 00:15:36,940 --> 00:15:40,983 "Professor Clifford Cabot's Cabinet of Sexual Curiosities". 299 00:15:41,018 --> 00:15:43,359 Now that's just to get them in the door. 300 00:15:43,965 --> 00:15:45,532 I'm beginning to get the idea. 301 00:15:45,567 --> 00:15:48,469 and I think a judge might as well, however... 302 00:15:48,504 --> 00:15:52,275 I still feel if you don't give a little, 303 00:15:52,310 --> 00:15:55,842 you'll stand to lose a lot. 304 00:15:56,448 --> 00:15:59,189 Sorry about the mess. It's been busy lately. 305 00:15:59,224 --> 00:16:00,654 I can imagine. 306 00:16:01,219 --> 00:16:05,822 Oh, look, Denise. When's the last time you saw a TV tray? 307 00:16:05,857 --> 00:16:08,991 Suddenly I feel like watching "Bonanza". 308 00:16:09,026 --> 00:16:11,835 So you want to talk about Adele? 309 00:16:11,870 --> 00:16:14,248 Yes, Adele tells us that you have moved her into 310 00:16:14,283 --> 00:16:17,258 an assisted living facility and are selling off her assets. 311 00:16:17,293 --> 00:16:19,009 Well, it's the only way to pay for the place. 312 00:16:19,044 --> 00:16:20,535 They're so damn expensive. 313 00:16:20,570 --> 00:16:21,992 Someone should look into that. 314 00:16:22,027 --> 00:16:24,384 An alternative would be to take her out of the facility 315 00:16:24,419 --> 00:16:27,401 and move her back home. Just a thought. 316 00:16:27,436 --> 00:16:30,384 Oh, I know Adele does not want to be there. 317 00:16:30,419 --> 00:16:32,711 She's fighting me on that one. 318 00:16:33,444 --> 00:16:35,381 Mr. Wharton, we've met with Adele. 319 00:16:35,416 --> 00:16:38,702 And while she may have had trouble when she first arrived at the hospital, 320 00:16:38,737 --> 00:16:43,213 she has since recovered and is ready to move on with her life. 321 00:16:43,248 --> 00:16:47,616 And as her attorneys, we'd like to help you move on with certain things as well. 322 00:16:47,651 --> 00:16:49,865 We've gotten rid of the trouble of court nonsense... 323 00:16:49,900 --> 00:16:52,080 Notary public, standing in line at the post office... 324 00:16:52,115 --> 00:16:54,377 You have only to sign this release, 325 00:16:54,412 --> 00:16:56,847 and we will relieve you of one of the burdens 326 00:16:56,882 --> 00:17:00,638 of your already overburdened workload. 327 00:17:00,975 --> 00:17:02,636 She got to you, didn't she? 328 00:17:02,671 --> 00:17:03,318 I beg your pardon? 329 00:17:03,353 --> 00:17:06,405 Adele. She's very good with strangers. 330 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,212 Adele has clinical depression. 331 00:17:08,247 --> 00:17:10,619 You probably saw her on a good day. 332 00:17:10,654 --> 00:17:14,989 She has bouts of forgetfulness, poor judgment, difficulty concentrating. 333 00:17:15,024 --> 00:17:19,160 If I were to let her go, as an appointee of the court, 334 00:17:19,195 --> 00:17:23,859 and more importantly, as one of the only people who cares about her, 335 00:17:23,894 --> 00:17:26,781 I would be completely remiss. 336 00:17:30,119 --> 00:17:33,241 Mr. Wharton, what color are Adele's eyes? 337 00:17:33,276 --> 00:17:35,658 Uh... blue. 338 00:17:35,693 --> 00:17:38,005 They're brown. 339 00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:40,391 What was her son's name? 340 00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:42,522 Jonathan. 341 00:17:43,612 --> 00:17:46,629 Mr. Wharton, as someone who cares about Adele 342 00:17:46,664 --> 00:17:49,869 and is supposed to be caring for Adele, 343 00:17:49,904 --> 00:17:53,169 you seem to be very forgetful yourself. 344 00:17:53,204 --> 00:17:56,434 Please don't forget your court date. 345 00:18:15,293 --> 00:18:16,783 Denny. 346 00:18:19,735 --> 00:18:20,565 You're panting. 347 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:21,912 Yes. 348 00:18:21,947 --> 00:18:24,058 Because of me? 349 00:18:24,059 --> 00:18:26,031 Because of you. 350 00:18:26,066 --> 00:18:27,969 Lock the door. 351 00:18:28,004 --> 00:18:31,699 Because of you... Paul didn't keep his meeting with the building manager 352 00:18:31,734 --> 00:18:33,105 and Brad stiffed him. 353 00:18:33,140 --> 00:18:35,371 Now we don't have elevator service before 7:00am, 354 00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:38,151 and I had to walk up 14 flights of stairs. Didn't you? 355 00:18:38,186 --> 00:18:41,101 I climb the stairs every morning. The elevator's for democrats. 356 00:18:41,136 --> 00:18:42,969 Lock the door. 357 00:18:43,564 --> 00:18:45,712 My nipple's hard. 358 00:18:45,747 --> 00:18:48,406 While I appreciate the update on your vestigial teat, 359 00:18:48,441 --> 00:18:50,010 you're not horny, you're freezing. 360 00:18:50,045 --> 00:18:51,770 Apparently the heat doesn't go on in the building 361 00:18:51,805 --> 00:18:56,176 before 7:00am because Paul didn't keep his special agreement with the building. 362 00:18:56,211 --> 00:18:58,407 You're not gonna lock the door, are you? 363 00:18:58,442 --> 00:19:00,604 Denny, you have gotta convince Paul to stay. 364 00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:03,015 Me? Never happen. 365 00:19:03,050 --> 00:19:06,869 The reason you, me, Alan and the rest of us get to go to court 366 00:19:06,904 --> 00:19:10,688 and yell "Objection" and sue people and make witnesses cry is Paul. 367 00:19:10,723 --> 00:19:12,729 Paul makes the elevators run. 368 00:19:12,764 --> 00:19:16,681 He supervises the associates, he double-checks the billable. 369 00:19:16,716 --> 00:19:19,683 Well, let me tell you, Shirley, 370 00:19:19,933 --> 00:19:22,544 what makes this place run... 371 00:19:22,579 --> 00:19:24,621 money. And I bring it in. 372 00:19:24,656 --> 00:19:26,875 You bring it in, Denny. 373 00:19:26,910 --> 00:19:29,060 But Paul puts it to work. 374 00:19:29,095 --> 00:19:32,820 Shirley... A supermarket doesn't close cause the cashier quit. 375 00:19:32,855 --> 00:19:34,331 Yes, it does, Denny. 376 00:19:34,366 --> 00:19:37,964 Otherwise people would just walk out with the food. 377 00:19:44,572 --> 00:19:45,776 Good news. 378 00:19:45,811 --> 00:19:48,163 My client, in the spirit of cooperation, 379 00:19:48,198 --> 00:19:52,180 has may what I consider an amicable and generous offer. 380 00:19:52,935 --> 00:19:56,700 Natalie is willing to give up the entire erotica collection... 381 00:19:56,735 --> 00:19:59,310 book, magazines, paintings, photos... 382 00:19:59,345 --> 00:20:04,127 a collection which includes five first edition copies of "The Pearl". 383 00:20:04,162 --> 00:20:06,913 Which I'm guessing is not a biography of Earl Monroe. 384 00:20:06,948 --> 00:20:08,039 Hardly. 385 00:20:08,074 --> 00:20:12,841 The full title is,"The Pearl; a journal of facetiae and voluptuous reading". 386 00:20:12,876 --> 00:20:16,821 It was first published in London by the society of vice in 1879. 387 00:20:16,856 --> 00:20:19,979 The original, unbound periodicals are exceedingly rare. 388 00:20:20,014 --> 00:20:23,901 And they alone are worth more than the entire rest of the collection put together. 389 00:20:23,936 --> 00:20:25,628 So we understand what we're talking about, 390 00:20:25,663 --> 00:20:26,799 perhaps I could read a passage. 391 00:20:26,834 --> 00:20:27,582 Ivan, that wouldn't... 392 00:20:27,583 --> 00:20:31,391 "I poured into her ears a tale of burning love. 393 00:20:31,426 --> 00:20:35,130 Finding that she made no resistance, I pressed her to my bosom. 394 00:20:35,165 --> 00:20:39,239 I undressed her till she stood in perfect nudity. 395 00:20:39,274 --> 00:20:45,278 I led her to the bedside, she lay back, I sank to my knees, 396 00:20:45,313 --> 00:20:50,027 and then with eagerness and tenderness, I... " 397 00:20:51,336 --> 00:20:53,445 Well, you get the idea. 398 00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:56,012 As cheesy as that was, I do. 399 00:20:56,047 --> 00:20:57,993 Well, that being said, 400 00:20:58,028 --> 00:21:01,368 Natalie is willing to give up the collection except for one small item 401 00:21:01,403 --> 00:21:03,433 that she currently has in her possession. 402 00:21:03,468 --> 00:21:04,607 Which item? 403 00:21:04,642 --> 00:21:06,162 Something called the hysteria machine. 404 00:21:06,197 --> 00:21:07,435 The hysteria machine? 405 00:21:07,470 --> 00:21:08,298 That Harridan! 406 00:21:08,299 --> 00:21:09,931 What the hell is a hysteria machine? 407 00:21:09,966 --> 00:21:11,971 The premier piece of the entire collection. 408 00:21:12,006 --> 00:21:13,554 Why didn't I see this coming? 409 00:21:13,589 --> 00:21:15,883 Forget the house, forget the pewter. 410 00:21:15,918 --> 00:21:18,177 She wants to play dirty, so be it. 411 00:21:19,307 --> 00:21:22,266 Ivan, we're going to court. 412 00:21:22,728 --> 00:21:24,723 Sounds like a date. 413 00:21:32,116 --> 00:21:34,529 Your honor, since he became Mrs. Freeman's conservator, 414 00:21:34,564 --> 00:21:38,469 Mr. Wharton has placed Mrs. Freeman in a convalescent home against her will, 415 00:21:38,504 --> 00:21:41,295 has taken control of all her credit cards. 416 00:21:41,330 --> 00:21:44,086 He has charged exorbitant fees to the estate. 417 00:21:44,121 --> 00:21:46,399 To pay her $90 electric bill, 418 00:21:46,434 --> 00:21:48,642 he charged the estate $150. 419 00:21:48,677 --> 00:21:54,001 He charged $170 to bring her less than $50 worth of groceries. 420 00:21:54,036 --> 00:21:56,589 Your honor, these are legitimate expenses. 421 00:21:56,624 --> 00:21:59,108 The truth is, if everyone did their job, 422 00:21:59,143 --> 00:22:01,986 helped out with their family, their friends, their neighbors, 423 00:22:02,021 --> 00:22:04,226 it would render my job unnecessary. 424 00:22:04,261 --> 00:22:05,332 But we don't. 425 00:22:05,367 --> 00:22:09,028 We, as a society, don't like to care of the old and the weak. 426 00:22:09,063 --> 00:22:12,271 It's a difficult, heart wrenching affair. 427 00:22:12,306 --> 00:22:15,613 Well, I stood up and am doing it. 428 00:22:15,648 --> 00:22:20,883 I have an affidavit from the admitting nurse at the hospital where Adele was first taken. 429 00:22:20,918 --> 00:22:25,627 She says Adele was confused, disoriented and apparently hadn't eaten in several days. 430 00:22:25,662 --> 00:22:30,337 A state any of us might be in after the death of our last surviving family member. 431 00:22:30,372 --> 00:22:33,805 I have an affidavit from The Cottonwood Assisted Living Home, 432 00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:37,362 which states Mrs. Freeman is lucid and rational. 433 00:22:37,397 --> 00:22:40,885 She's lucid because she's well taken care of. 434 00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:42,814 Mr. Wharton makes a point. 435 00:22:42,849 --> 00:22:46,270 Mrs. Freeman is 83 and has no family. 436 00:22:46,305 --> 00:22:49,801 What if she goes off her medication? Suppose she takes a fall? 437 00:22:49,836 --> 00:22:53,172 Your honor, if that's a concern, I can arrange for her to live with a friend. 438 00:22:53,207 --> 00:22:57,243 A friend, especially a mature friend, 439 00:22:57,278 --> 00:23:00,925 is not the same as a family member or a legal conservator. 440 00:23:00,960 --> 00:23:03,329 Your Honor, I... I've heard enough from both sides. 441 00:23:03,364 --> 00:23:07,139 I'm assigning a court appointed psychiatrist to examine you, Mrs. Freeman. 442 00:23:07,174 --> 00:23:11,507 Until I have evidence that you are entirely self-sufficient, 443 00:23:11,542 --> 00:23:14,798 you will remain a ward of Mr. Wharton. 444 00:23:14,833 --> 00:23:17,968 We will reconvene in six weeks after the examination. 445 00:23:18,003 --> 00:23:19,510 Six weeks? 446 00:23:19,545 --> 00:23:22,540 Your Honor, for Mrs. Freeman, that is a lifetime. 447 00:23:22,575 --> 00:23:26,907 And in the court system, it's practically the speed of light. 448 00:23:27,389 --> 00:23:29,054 We're adjourned. 449 00:23:31,168 --> 00:23:33,468 It was actually used as a medical device. 450 00:23:33,503 --> 00:23:37,970 During the Victorian Era, there was an inability or an unwillingness of society 451 00:23:38,005 --> 00:23:39,812 to comprehend female sexual desire, 452 00:23:39,847 --> 00:23:43,729 so this desire was misinterpreted as "an illness". 453 00:23:43,764 --> 00:23:45,748 It doesn't seem to be working. 454 00:23:45,783 --> 00:23:47,866 Well, it takes a minute or two to get its steam up. 455 00:23:47,901 --> 00:23:49,857 In the meantime, professor Cabot, 456 00:23:49,892 --> 00:23:52,461 could you tell us how the hysteria machine works? 457 00:23:52,496 --> 00:23:56,240 Women frequently complained of symptoms such as nervousness, uh, 458 00:23:56,275 --> 00:23:59,985 heaviness in the abdomen, vaginal lubrication, insomnia and so on. 459 00:24:00,020 --> 00:24:02,447 Doctors referred to these symptoms as hysteria, 460 00:24:02,482 --> 00:24:06,122 but of course, they're actually signs of sexual arousal. 461 00:24:06,157 --> 00:24:09,727 Before the invention of this machine, a doctor would, uh, 462 00:24:09,762 --> 00:24:14,643 massage a woman until she reached a climactic "Paroxysm," as they called it. 463 00:24:14,678 --> 00:24:18,359 I should've listened to my mother. She always wanted me to be a doctor. 464 00:24:18,605 --> 00:24:20,514 And how did this machine come into being? 465 00:24:20,549 --> 00:24:25,949 A doctor invented it because, well... his arm got tired. 466 00:24:26,629 --> 00:24:30,222 Ah, the steam is up, and it's ready to go. 467 00:24:31,782 --> 00:24:32,981 Oh, my God. 468 00:24:33,016 --> 00:24:34,258 It's amazing, isn't it? 469 00:24:34,259 --> 00:24:38,975 And I haven't even put the attachments on yet, which go right there. 470 00:24:40,798 --> 00:24:42,556 Oh, my God! 471 00:24:42,591 --> 00:24:44,846 It's the only working one of its kind in the world. 472 00:24:44,881 --> 00:24:47,847 It's unique and valuable and irreplaceable. 473 00:24:47,882 --> 00:24:50,899 Would you, uh, shut it off, please? 474 00:24:55,356 --> 00:25:00,149 Sorry, your Honor. A steam engine doesn't just shut off right away. 475 00:25:05,317 --> 00:25:09,996 Mr. Wharton, unfortunately, what may seem like a small victory is 476 00:25:10,031 --> 00:25:13,917 really just postponing the inevitable. We will prevail, 477 00:25:13,952 --> 00:25:17,151 and since I know you're anxious to get home and rake your shag carpet, 478 00:25:17,186 --> 00:25:19,570 why don't you just let this one go? 479 00:25:19,605 --> 00:25:21,898 Well, mostly because I'm mad. 480 00:25:21,933 --> 00:25:24,609 And for Adele's sake, I'm willing to stay in this for the long haul. 481 00:25:24,644 --> 00:25:27,263 I'll hire my own high priced attorneys at $500 an hour. 482 00:25:27,298 --> 00:25:29,883 And you know where that money comes from, don't you? 483 00:25:29,918 --> 00:25:31,461 Adele's bank account. 484 00:25:31,496 --> 00:25:35,212 That's what it's there for... To insure the well being of my client. 485 00:25:35,247 --> 00:25:41,895 But don't worry, I'll eventually stop battling you once all the money's run out. 486 00:25:55,094 --> 00:26:00,417 Professor Cabot, don't you intend, eventually, to donate this collection, 487 00:26:00,452 --> 00:26:05,741 including the hysteria machine to a museum, a place where everyone could... 488 00:26:05,776 --> 00:26:07,198 get some pleasure from it? 489 00:26:07,233 --> 00:26:09,749 Objection, your Honor. Leading the witness. 490 00:26:09,784 --> 00:26:12,230 Sustained. The witness will not answer. 491 00:26:12,265 --> 00:26:16,234 But I got the point anyway. Please take a seat. 492 00:26:16,269 --> 00:26:21,707 It seems to me that professor Clifford Cabot's motivation for wanting the machine 493 00:26:21,742 --> 00:26:27,213 would serve a greater good than your more... localized motivations. 494 00:26:27,248 --> 00:26:32,650 I'm inclined to award the machine to professor Clifford Cabot. 495 00:26:32,685 --> 00:26:37,082 Bring it and an inventory of the rest of the collection into court this afternoon, 496 00:26:37,117 --> 00:26:40,069 and then I'll decide who gets what. 497 00:26:47,985 --> 00:26:51,869 Alan... He's selling her house. 498 00:26:57,078 --> 00:26:58,849 That's my living room, 499 00:26:58,884 --> 00:27:01,393 my son Jonathan's bedroom, 500 00:27:01,428 --> 00:27:03,868 my kitchen, my bathroom. 501 00:27:03,903 --> 00:27:08,931 My house is a "Charming 3- bedroom with potential. " 502 00:27:08,966 --> 00:27:09,964 What's going on? 503 00:27:09,999 --> 00:27:12,611 Mr. Wharton is even more rancid than I had imagined. 504 00:27:12,646 --> 00:27:15,381 He's attempting to sell Adele's home. 505 00:27:15,416 --> 00:27:18,348 Apparently, this isn't the first time Mr. Wharton has done this. 506 00:27:18,383 --> 00:27:23,261 According to a title search, he has sold 11 houses belonging to his wards. 507 00:27:23,296 --> 00:27:25,987 And get this, the house he's living in right now 508 00:27:26,022 --> 00:27:28,839 belonged to another one of his wards who happened to 509 00:27:28,874 --> 00:27:31,462 pass away in her sleep. 510 00:27:31,497 --> 00:27:33,776 This man is pure evil. 511 00:27:33,811 --> 00:27:38,824 Alan, you have gotta get that creative brain of yours to work and stop him. 512 00:27:38,859 --> 00:27:40,389 Yes, I do. 513 00:27:43,741 --> 00:27:44,376 Stolen? 514 00:27:44,411 --> 00:27:45,555 Right out of her car. 515 00:27:45,556 --> 00:27:46,383 Oh, no. 516 00:27:46,418 --> 00:27:47,325 It's all she had. 517 00:27:47,326 --> 00:27:48,991 Please, this is ludicrous. 518 00:27:49,026 --> 00:27:52,495 I mean, obviously Mrs. Cabot doesn't want to surrender the hysteria machine, 519 00:27:52,530 --> 00:27:55,496 and she's hiding it fromher husband for her own personal reasons. 520 00:27:55,531 --> 00:27:56,997 That's a shocking accusation. 521 00:27:57,032 --> 00:27:59,087 You know, you're right. You don't play fair. 522 00:27:59,122 --> 00:28:00,414 What can I say? 523 00:28:00,449 --> 00:28:03,758 Your Honor, my client recognizes that the news is causing distress 524 00:28:03,793 --> 00:28:07,748 to professor Cabot, and is therefore willing to pay her half of the appraised value. 525 00:28:07,783 --> 00:28:12,348 Nonsense. the item is question was in Mrs. Cabot's care and control. 526 00:28:12,383 --> 00:28:17,710 Clearly, this machine is a precious item... to him. 527 00:28:17,745 --> 00:28:21,621 I am therefore ordering you pay the full cost of the machine, 528 00:28:21,656 --> 00:28:24,345 plus punitive damages I will determine at a later date. 529 00:28:24,380 --> 00:28:27,910 Your Honor, this is unacceptable. Obviously, she still has the machine. 530 00:28:27,945 --> 00:28:30,759 If it turns up, we will address the matter later. 531 00:28:30,794 --> 00:28:34,203 But until such time, this ruling stands. 532 00:28:34,424 --> 00:28:35,398 You lying bitch. 533 00:28:35,433 --> 00:28:36,373 Don't threaten me. 534 00:28:36,374 --> 00:28:37,309 You think this is over? 535 00:28:37,344 --> 00:28:38,025 The judge ruled. 536 00:28:38,026 --> 00:28:38,660 It's not over. 537 00:28:38,695 --> 00:28:39,917 People! 538 00:28:40,560 --> 00:28:43,455 Clifford, we need to push forward with this. 539 00:28:43,490 --> 00:28:45,381 If the hysteria machine was stolen, 540 00:28:45,416 --> 00:28:48,141 you need to take the necessary and appropriate action. 541 00:28:48,176 --> 00:28:51,298 And as co-owner, you will file a police report, 542 00:28:51,333 --> 00:28:54,285 and you will file a claim with your insurance company. 543 00:28:54,320 --> 00:28:56,996 There'll be an investigation. You'll have to open up your house. 544 00:28:57,031 --> 00:28:59,662 If you give a false statement to the police 545 00:28:59,697 --> 00:29:02,258 or, worse these days, the insurance company, 546 00:29:02,293 --> 00:29:05,454 you'll be charged with fraud and prosecuted to the full extent of the law. 547 00:29:05,489 --> 00:29:08,616 And from my experiences, the DA's office takes these crimes seriously 548 00:29:08,651 --> 00:29:10,416 and often pushes for jail time, 549 00:29:10,451 --> 00:29:13,263 where you'll be able to do lots of women's studies. 550 00:29:13,298 --> 00:29:15,121 Shirley. 551 00:29:15,156 --> 00:29:17,505 Now, that's not nice. 552 00:29:17,540 --> 00:29:19,553 Are we being nice now? 553 00:29:30,965 --> 00:29:33,131 This is for $4,000, Bob. 554 00:29:33,166 --> 00:29:38,547 A provost is a high-ranking officer commonly found at what type of institution? 555 00:29:38,582 --> 00:29:42,548 Museum..., hospital, university, bank. 556 00:29:42,583 --> 00:29:44,901 It's university, you idiot. 557 00:29:44,936 --> 00:29:46,291 University. 558 00:29:46,549 --> 00:29:47,484 Final Answer? 559 00:29:47,519 --> 00:29:48,420 Final. 560 00:29:48,904 --> 00:29:51,538 Yes, sir. You got it again, Bob. 561 00:29:57,406 --> 00:30:00,349 Help! Help! 562 00:30:00,384 --> 00:30:03,164 Oh, God! Oh, God! 563 00:30:03,199 --> 00:30:07,587 Help! Help! 564 00:30:18,537 --> 00:30:21,890 Yoo-hoo, anybody home? 565 00:30:23,721 --> 00:30:25,445 Mr. Wharton. 566 00:30:28,219 --> 00:30:30,536 Oh, my goodness. 567 00:30:30,571 --> 00:30:32,819 This is dreadful. 568 00:30:32,854 --> 00:30:36,482 Look at you. You've been assaulted and robbed. 569 00:30:36,517 --> 00:30:38,448 Oh, the world we live in. 570 00:30:38,483 --> 00:30:42,200 Who on earth would do something such as this? 571 00:30:44,367 --> 00:30:46,922 Oh, of course. You can't speak. 572 00:30:46,957 --> 00:30:49,477 I'll get you a pad and a pencil. 573 00:30:49,762 --> 00:30:52,550 No, that's no good. Your hands are tied. My God. 574 00:30:52,585 --> 00:30:57,051 You must have been left here for what, over an hour? 575 00:30:57,086 --> 00:31:01,517 It must feel awful to be left alone and vulnerable. 576 00:31:02,345 --> 00:31:07,689 Well, apparently, they made off with nothing more than some dingy old file boxes, 577 00:31:07,724 --> 00:31:10,191 which could only contain records, I would imagine. 578 00:31:10,226 --> 00:31:11,469 How stupid are they? 579 00:31:11,504 --> 00:31:13,737 I mean, what could they possibly hope to get for that? 580 00:31:13,772 --> 00:31:16,442 Anyway, I'm glad it's over. 581 00:31:16,816 --> 00:31:19,858 Let's just pray it never happens again 582 00:31:19,893 --> 00:31:24,685 and again and... again. Oh. 583 00:31:24,720 --> 00:31:29,037 Also, obviously, you're in no shape to handle your court appointed duties, 584 00:31:29,072 --> 00:31:31,325 particularly with regard to Adele. Not to worry. 585 00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:38,691 I just happen to have with me that... release form from the other day. 586 00:31:38,726 --> 00:31:44,006 Now maybe there's just enough give here... 587 00:31:44,687 --> 00:31:47,673 to let you sign it. 588 00:31:47,708 --> 00:31:51,423 There's that. Here you go. 589 00:31:52,867 --> 00:31:55,438 Wonderful. 590 00:31:57,287 --> 00:32:03,199 You know, now that this experience has brought us closer, 591 00:32:03,234 --> 00:32:06,103 I feel I can say this. 592 00:32:06,512 --> 00:32:10,118 Sometimes these events are just what one needs 593 00:32:10,153 --> 00:32:12,595 to shake things up a bit, make a change. 594 00:32:12,630 --> 00:32:16,488 New job, new direction, new ideas... just a thought. 595 00:32:16,523 --> 00:32:20,346 I'm thinking now would be a perfect time to start. 596 00:32:21,450 --> 00:32:23,768 Yes, well, this is much better already. 597 00:32:23,803 --> 00:32:27,235 I feel that foreboding sense of danger fading. 598 00:32:27,270 --> 00:32:30,632 Still, best to stay alert, on the right path. 599 00:32:30,667 --> 00:32:33,974 Because you never know when this kind of thing might happen again. 600 00:32:34,009 --> 00:32:36,865 You only know that it will. 601 00:32:53,252 --> 00:32:54,634 Hey. 602 00:32:55,895 --> 00:32:57,965 Hey, hey. 603 00:33:03,265 --> 00:33:06,125 You didn't actually file a police report? 604 00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:08,684 And an insurance claim. 605 00:33:10,186 --> 00:33:11,844 Shirley... 606 00:33:12,325 --> 00:33:17,181 If, God forbid, the guy who stole this feels remorse and returns it to my client, 607 00:33:17,216 --> 00:33:19,120 she could end up going to jail. 608 00:33:19,155 --> 00:33:23,698 It's a tribute to the risks one is willing to take for some momentary pleasure. 609 00:33:23,733 --> 00:33:26,573 Which proves my point, by the way. 610 00:33:26,608 --> 00:33:29,651 It's not just me, it's all of us. 611 00:33:29,686 --> 00:33:32,659 We are all merely sexual animals. 612 00:33:32,694 --> 00:33:36,892 And Shirley, as crude as you might think me at times, 613 00:33:36,927 --> 00:33:41,090 at least I put myself out there and act on my instincts. 614 00:33:41,125 --> 00:33:43,499 You must at least admire me for that. 615 00:33:43,534 --> 00:33:46,099 I more than admire you, Ivan, and you know it. 616 00:33:46,134 --> 00:33:48,630 You have a wife who adores you and who you love... 617 00:33:48,665 --> 00:33:52,278 probably more than you're willing to admit... and for her sake, 618 00:33:52,313 --> 00:33:58,013 if not more importantly for you own, you need to grow up. 619 00:34:04,938 --> 00:34:06,924 I love you, Shirley. 620 00:34:10,841 --> 00:34:13,210 I love you, too. 621 00:34:31,583 --> 00:34:32,611 Sam. 622 00:34:33,012 --> 00:34:34,389 Denny Crane. 623 00:34:34,424 --> 00:34:35,958 Good to see you. 624 00:34:35,993 --> 00:34:37,457 Oh, look at you. 625 00:34:37,492 --> 00:34:38,222 How's Evenly? 626 00:34:38,257 --> 00:34:38,952 She's well. 627 00:34:38,953 --> 00:34:41,081 She's very well. Thanks for asking. 628 00:34:41,116 --> 00:34:43,175 How is the fishing going this season? 629 00:34:43,210 --> 00:34:44,848 In the water or in the bedroom? 630 00:34:49,012 --> 00:34:52,846 Well... what can we do for you? 631 00:34:52,881 --> 00:34:54,796 Shouldn't we wait for Paul Lewiston? 632 00:34:54,831 --> 00:34:58,027 Paul's... dialing things back a little right now. 633 00:34:58,062 --> 00:35:00,492 Oh, well... 634 00:35:00,527 --> 00:35:03,981 I'm considering divesting from some of my Hong Kong subsidiaries... 635 00:35:04,016 --> 00:35:04,458 Really? 636 00:35:04,493 --> 00:35:07,274 And, uh... I'm sorry. 637 00:35:07,275 --> 00:35:08,932 Is Paul leaving the firm? 638 00:35:08,967 --> 00:35:11,434 It's unclear. But the point is, 639 00:35:11,469 --> 00:35:15,011 I'm your point man. Always have been. 640 00:35:15,579 --> 00:35:17,546 Denny, we've known each other long time, 641 00:35:17,581 --> 00:35:20,930 so I don't take any pleasure in being this blunt, 642 00:35:20,965 --> 00:35:24,279 but I love having a drink with you, schmoozing. 643 00:35:24,314 --> 00:35:25,718 Right. 644 00:35:25,753 --> 00:35:28,214 Paul's the one I deal with. 645 00:35:28,249 --> 00:35:33,387 I mean, he's the expert in Asian markets, and you... 646 00:35:33,861 --> 00:35:35,799 Well... 647 00:35:47,825 --> 00:35:49,468 This is for you. 648 00:35:51,045 --> 00:35:52,187 What is it? 649 00:35:52,222 --> 00:35:53,330 Open it. 650 00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:01,068 Denny... 651 00:36:01,103 --> 00:36:05,702 Just a simple "Thank you, Oh, kind and benevolent leader" will suffice. 652 00:36:07,227 --> 00:36:09,692 I can't accept this. 653 00:36:09,727 --> 00:36:11,987 I thought it was what you always wanted. 654 00:36:12,022 --> 00:36:15,407 I'm sure it's what you thought I always wanted. 655 00:36:15,442 --> 00:36:18,195 You trying to play hardball with me, Paul? 656 00:36:18,935 --> 00:36:23,459 Don't tell me this whole thing is simply a matter of respect? 657 00:36:24,127 --> 00:36:25,856 Good God, it is. 658 00:36:25,891 --> 00:36:31,043 My mind and my priorities are exactly where they should be right now. 659 00:36:31,078 --> 00:36:36,196 When Rachel gets out, I will be back here full-time, or maybe I won't. 660 00:36:36,231 --> 00:36:39,237 In the meantime, it will give you the opportunity 661 00:36:39,272 --> 00:36:44,742 to actually think about things for a change. 662 00:36:46,513 --> 00:36:48,965 God bless us. We found it. 663 00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:51,539 The antique, steam-powered woman-pleasing machine 664 00:36:51,574 --> 00:36:53,933 is always in the last place you look. 665 00:36:53,968 --> 00:36:55,078 You bet. 666 00:36:55,079 --> 00:36:57,884 Now my client is more than thrilled to return it 667 00:36:57,919 --> 00:37:00,373 and just ask for visitation right. 668 00:37:00,408 --> 00:37:02,792 However, she cannot do that from jail, 669 00:37:02,827 --> 00:37:07,051 and so she requests that the police and insurance claims be withdrawn. 670 00:37:07,086 --> 00:37:11,276 Done. I just want to check to make sure it's the original machine. 671 00:37:11,311 --> 00:37:12,981 You don't trust me. 672 00:37:14,278 --> 00:37:16,554 Not a bad idea. 673 00:37:38,718 --> 00:37:41,304 I left my wife, Shirley. 674 00:37:43,530 --> 00:37:45,652 Did you? 675 00:37:45,687 --> 00:37:48,004 About an hour ago. 676 00:37:56,238 --> 00:37:58,734 So what do you think? 677 00:38:00,051 --> 00:38:03,666 To be honest, I'm a little afraid to think. 678 00:38:04,531 --> 00:38:07,417 Well, no need then. 679 00:38:07,452 --> 00:38:11,593 However, you know me. I do have a question. 680 00:38:11,999 --> 00:38:14,470 And what would that be? 681 00:38:17,100 --> 00:38:21,097 Would you like to see my attachments? 682 00:38:42,117 --> 00:38:44,196 Denny... You're here late. 683 00:38:44,231 --> 00:38:45,905 I run the place. 684 00:38:46,286 --> 00:38:47,718 So... 685 00:38:48,450 --> 00:38:50,275 You and Shirley... 686 00:38:51,507 --> 00:38:54,170 that gives us something in common. 687 00:38:54,205 --> 00:38:55,714 A hell of a woman. 688 00:38:55,749 --> 00:38:57,908 We have something else in common. 689 00:38:57,943 --> 00:38:59,677 What's that? 690 00:39:00,021 --> 00:39:01,582 We're both... 691 00:39:01,617 --> 00:39:06,028 leading men. We're like stars in our own show. 692 00:39:06,063 --> 00:39:09,360 Only the star doesn't have only one leading lady. 693 00:39:09,395 --> 00:39:12,210 Oh, sure, sometimes, at the end of an episode, 694 00:39:12,245 --> 00:39:14,991 it looks like he's settling down with someone, 695 00:39:15,026 --> 00:39:17,603 but the next week, she's not there. It's somebody else. 696 00:39:17,638 --> 00:39:21,241 It's a way of holding up viewer interest. 697 00:39:21,276 --> 00:39:23,445 You're a strange man, Denny. 698 00:39:23,973 --> 00:39:26,659 Strange leading man. 699 00:39:29,789 --> 00:39:33,093 You're not gonna hurt her, Ivan. 700 00:39:53,024 --> 00:39:55,316 So whose ass did you have kicked? 701 00:39:57,878 --> 00:40:01,040 Someone whose ass thoroughly deserved it. 702 00:40:01,075 --> 00:40:02,457 Good. 703 00:40:02,492 --> 00:40:05,619 I can never understand why people don't use violence 704 00:40:05,654 --> 00:40:08,747 more often to solve their problems. Works every time. 705 00:40:08,782 --> 00:40:11,474 Actually, I'm quite disturbed by it. 706 00:40:11,509 --> 00:40:16,273 I had a real appetite for Mr. Wharton's fear and suffering. 707 00:40:16,308 --> 00:40:18,045 Is that unusual? 708 00:40:18,080 --> 00:40:19,782 For me? Not at all. 709 00:40:20,252 --> 00:40:24,252 What was unusual was how swiftly I acted on my carvings. 710 00:40:24,287 --> 00:40:26,344 It was an emergency. What else could you do? 711 00:40:26,379 --> 00:40:28,280 Something more clever. 712 00:40:31,832 --> 00:40:34,696 Equally disturbing was how easy it all was... 713 00:40:34,731 --> 00:40:36,896 a quick fix which required very little thought on my part. 714 00:40:36,931 --> 00:40:39,134 Just a phone call. 715 00:40:42,576 --> 00:40:45,244 I wonder what I'm turning into. 716 00:40:45,279 --> 00:40:47,258 Denny Crane. 717 00:40:49,616 --> 00:40:53,663 I think I'm still a long ways away from that. 718 00:40:54,508 --> 00:40:56,149 Don't you worry. 719 00:40:56,692 --> 00:40:58,614 You'll get there. 56360

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.