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1
00:00:08,590 --> 00:00:11,150
Okay, boys, this one's for Jerry.
2
00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:12,940
May he rest in peace.
3
00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:16,310
One for me, one for
you, and one for you.
4
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:19,230
D-Do not peer pressure me. I
haven't taken my pills yet.
5
00:00:19,290 --> 00:00:20,466
Do you know what happens when you mix
6
00:00:20,490 --> 00:00:22,410
prescription drugs and alcohol?
7
00:00:22,430 --> 00:00:24,290
Yeah, a good time.
8
00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:28,460
I wouldn't do it. I once
mixed six tabs of acid
9
00:00:28,490 --> 00:00:30,680
with some New England hard cider.
10
00:00:30,690 --> 00:00:32,130
Long story short,
11
00:00:32,160 --> 00:00:35,300
I can't eat apples with
my clothes on anymore.
12
00:00:35,330 --> 00:00:38,270
Let's raise a glass.
13
00:00:38,300 --> 00:00:40,730
Jerry, what can I say?
14
00:00:40,990 --> 00:00:43,350
You were the most ornery, foul-mouthed,
15
00:00:43,370 --> 00:00:46,000
mentally deranged son
of a bitch I ever met,
16
00:00:46,010 --> 00:00:47,490
and thank God I did.
17
00:00:48,810 --> 00:00:50,566
- We're gonna miss you, old pal.
- Yeah, we are.
18
00:00:50,590 --> 00:00:51,600
To Jerry.
19
00:00:51,610 --> 00:00:53,270
- To Jerry.
- To Jerry!
20
00:00:56,910 --> 00:01:00,320
So, should we talk replacements?
21
00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:01,990
Have you lost your mind?
22
00:01:02,030 --> 00:01:04,930
Well, it is a prime seat.
We got to move fast.
23
00:01:04,960 --> 00:01:08,640
Now, look, guys, you know
we can never replace Jerry.
24
00:01:08,650 --> 00:01:11,530
The man was a legend. So
I say we honor his legacy
25
00:01:11,550 --> 00:01:13,870
the way it should be
honored, with an empty seat.
26
00:01:16,370 --> 00:01:18,130
Do you mind?
27
00:01:18,150 --> 00:01:20,810
It has been a bitch of a morning.
28
00:01:21,450 --> 00:01:24,480
Uh, hey, baby, you must be lost.
29
00:01:25,190 --> 00:01:26,790
Don't start, flyboy.
30
00:01:26,830 --> 00:01:29,920
I'm not in the mood and
I am not interested.
31
00:01:31,860 --> 00:01:33,830
Look, lady, I don't know who you are,
32
00:01:33,850 --> 00:01:35,790
but you can't sit there.
33
00:01:35,830 --> 00:01:38,730
Why not? Who are you
guys, the cool kids?
34
00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:40,660
Damn straight we are.
35
00:01:40,700 --> 00:01:43,200
You...
36
00:01:43,230 --> 00:01:44,230
Really?
37
00:01:45,370 --> 00:01:47,490
Him? Wow.
38
00:01:49,410 --> 00:01:51,040
I don't know where you came from,
39
00:01:51,070 --> 00:01:52,750
but you can't sit wherever you want.
40
00:01:52,850 --> 00:01:54,310
You got to be invited.
41
00:01:54,370 --> 00:01:56,320
He's right. You have to earn that spot.
42
00:01:56,330 --> 00:01:58,510
Fine. I'll arm wrestle you for it.
43
00:01:58,550 --> 00:02:02,230
- Fine.
- Wait, wait, S-Sid. Ooh.
44
00:02:04,810 --> 00:02:08,360
Did better than I thought.
45
00:02:08,390 --> 00:02:10,110
Look, you gots to go.
46
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,790
That seat belongs to Jerry.
47
00:02:11,830 --> 00:02:14,930
Is that right? Where is this Jerry?
48
00:02:15,090 --> 00:02:17,130
Good morning, Shady Meadows.
49
00:02:17,230 --> 00:02:19,850
I'm sorry to announce that Jerry Walsh
50
00:02:19,870 --> 00:02:21,490
passed away yesterday.
51
00:02:21,570 --> 00:02:23,116
There'll be free balloons
and a cheese plate
52
00:02:23,140 --> 00:02:25,610
available in his memory.
Have a nice day.
53
00:02:27,750 --> 00:02:29,170
Jerry?
54
00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:30,790
What is your problem?
55
00:02:30,810 --> 00:02:32,860
Why you want to sit at our
table so bad, anyway?
56
00:02:32,870 --> 00:02:34,220
You know, honestly, I don't,
57
00:02:34,250 --> 00:02:35,880
but then you told me that I couldn't.
58
00:02:35,920 --> 00:02:38,750
So now you are gonna need a
hearse to drag me out of here
59
00:02:38,790 --> 00:02:40,910
because nobody tells me what to do.
60
00:02:41,350 --> 00:02:42,730
Nobody.
61
00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:46,490
You want me to arm-wrestle her again?
62
00:02:46,530 --> 00:02:48,930
I think I'm getting a second wind.
63
00:03:07,850 --> 00:03:12,570
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
64
00:03:14,590 --> 00:03:16,950
That woman is violent.
65
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,690
I think she broke my elbow.
66
00:03:19,810 --> 00:03:21,930
Times sure have changed.
67
00:03:22,060 --> 00:03:23,950
I mean, in the '50s, a
woman wouldn't dare
68
00:03:23,970 --> 00:03:25,550
just come sit at our table like that.
69
00:03:25,610 --> 00:03:28,450
In the '50s, you wouldn't have
been allowed in the restaurant.
70
00:03:30,540 --> 00:03:32,570
I'd have been allowed
in, but I'd have had
71
00:03:32,590 --> 00:03:33,870
to talk like this.
72
00:03:36,470 --> 00:03:38,540
Plus, she disrespected Jerry.
73
00:03:38,580 --> 00:03:39,690
And speaking of Jerry,
74
00:03:39,710 --> 00:03:41,590
we need to talk about
his memorial service.
75
00:03:41,620 --> 00:03:42,840
Why do we have to talk about it?
76
00:03:42,850 --> 00:03:44,180
Aren't they gonna give him one?
77
00:03:44,190 --> 00:03:46,970
A cheese plate and
balloons is not a service.
78
00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:48,910
- Jerry liked to party.
- Yeah.
79
00:03:48,990 --> 00:03:50,860
He would want something epic.
80
00:03:50,890 --> 00:03:54,090
You know, like kegs and a DJ, fireworks,
81
00:03:54,130 --> 00:03:56,150
people getting butt naked up in here.
82
00:03:57,460 --> 00:04:00,670
We need to throw something
like a Burning Man.
83
00:04:00,900 --> 00:04:02,740
You want to burn a man?
84
00:04:02,770 --> 00:04:04,570
No, it's a sex festival in the desert.
85
00:04:04,590 --> 00:04:06,370
I go every year.
86
00:04:07,290 --> 00:04:10,990
Well, Allison is not gonna
let you throw a party.
87
00:04:11,090 --> 00:04:13,810
She runs this place like Alcatraz.
88
00:04:13,980 --> 00:04:16,580
Don't worry about Allison.
We gonna go around her.
89
00:04:16,620 --> 00:04:19,070
Yeah, but a party like that's
gonna cost a lot of dough.
90
00:04:19,150 --> 00:04:21,020
Money?
91
00:04:21,030 --> 00:04:23,350
Oh, that's not gonna be a problem.
92
00:04:23,460 --> 00:04:25,330
Well, why? You came into some scratch?
93
00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:29,030
Well... I got this.
94
00:04:29,060 --> 00:04:31,070
Is that Jerry's credit card?
95
00:04:31,630 --> 00:04:34,230
How the hell did you get
Jerry's credit card?
96
00:04:34,270 --> 00:04:36,130
Well, how does anything happen, Hank?
97
00:04:36,170 --> 00:04:38,350
You're not the only one with good ideas.
98
00:04:43,110 --> 00:04:45,240
Why is this still loose?
99
00:04:47,810 --> 00:04:50,380
Hey, do you know where
the supply closet is?
100
00:04:50,420 --> 00:04:53,370
No, nuh-uh. Do you know
how to fix a table?
101
00:04:53,410 --> 00:04:55,330
Psst! Come on, over here.
102
00:04:56,620 --> 00:04:58,590
Hurry up, man, come on.
103
00:04:58,620 --> 00:05:00,400
Sorry to be so sneaky,
104
00:05:00,410 --> 00:05:02,310
but you probably do this all the time.
105
00:05:02,410 --> 00:05:03,930
Not really.
106
00:05:04,100 --> 00:05:06,560
Okay. Can I get your credit card?
107
00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:07,810
Yes, you may.
108
00:05:07,870 --> 00:05:11,270
And, uh, I am Mr. Jerry Walsh.
109
00:05:12,030 --> 00:05:13,710
Okay. And a photo ID?
110
00:05:13,730 --> 00:05:14,930
Say what now?
111
00:05:16,180 --> 00:05:17,656
I mean, obviously, you're old enough.
112
00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:19,840
It's just company policy.
Is that gonna be a problem?
113
00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:21,026
No, that's not gonna be a problem.
114
00:05:21,050 --> 00:05:22,930
I mean, why would it
be a problem? You know.
115
00:05:22,950 --> 00:05:25,480
I'm sure I got it here
somewhere... somewhere.
116
00:05:25,930 --> 00:05:29,300
- Run!
- Run? I haven't run in 30 years.
117
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:30,870
You can do it.
118
00:05:30,910 --> 00:05:33,260
No, actually, I can't.
I've got three fake hips
119
00:05:33,290 --> 00:05:36,110
'cause of a bet I lost to
that doctor in Costa Rica.
120
00:05:36,230 --> 00:05:38,550
All right, look, on my
cue, we're gonna snatch
121
00:05:38,570 --> 00:05:40,210
that credit card and
make a break for it.
122
00:05:40,330 --> 00:05:43,300
- I'm sorry. Where were we, now?
- Just to let you know,
123
00:05:43,330 --> 00:05:45,130
I could hear everything
you guys were saying.
124
00:05:46,470 --> 00:05:47,570
Run!
125
00:05:47,740 --> 00:05:49,840
You don't have to run.
126
00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:52,010
I'm not gonna chase you.
127
00:05:58,630 --> 00:06:00,380
What are you guys trying to do to me?
128
00:06:00,420 --> 00:06:02,350
I mean, it feels like
it's becoming personal.
129
00:06:02,390 --> 00:06:03,450
Is it personal?
130
00:06:03,490 --> 00:06:05,660
Did I do something to offend you?
131
00:06:05,690 --> 00:06:07,520
Well, you took our credit card.
132
00:06:09,150 --> 00:06:11,210
You know, some of us
aren't retired, Hank.
133
00:06:11,270 --> 00:06:13,530
Some of us are trying to keep our jobs.
134
00:06:13,570 --> 00:06:15,650
That sounds like a "you" problem.
135
00:06:15,770 --> 00:06:18,670
No. Actually, it's a "you" problem.
136
00:06:18,700 --> 00:06:20,020
Actually actually,
137
00:06:20,030 --> 00:06:23,130
it's a "you and you and you" problem.
138
00:06:23,210 --> 00:06:25,490
Because of you three, I've
got higher blood pressure
139
00:06:25,530 --> 00:06:26,830
than half the people in here.
140
00:06:26,930 --> 00:06:29,350
That sounds like another "you" problem.
141
00:06:31,680 --> 00:06:33,570
I'm sorry about Jerry.
142
00:06:33,610 --> 00:06:36,030
But if we threw a rager
every time a person died,
143
00:06:36,110 --> 00:06:37,790
this place would look
like Bourbon Street.
144
00:06:37,870 --> 00:06:40,370
Bourbon Street's okay.
The best streets are...
145
00:06:40,390 --> 00:06:42,830
few blocks over.
146
00:06:43,790 --> 00:06:46,350
Bourbon Street's okay.
What I'm saying here, Sid,
147
00:06:46,430 --> 00:06:49,810
is that people want peace and quiet.
148
00:06:49,970 --> 00:06:52,600
Peace and quiet? I'm gonna have plenty
149
00:06:52,610 --> 00:06:54,100
of peace and quiet when I'm dead.
150
00:06:54,140 --> 00:06:57,010
I want to party. Jerry wanted to party.
151
00:06:57,030 --> 00:06:59,950
And nobody wants to party with
balloons and a cheese plate.
152
00:07:00,110 --> 00:07:01,610
What's so bad about that?
153
00:07:01,650 --> 00:07:04,950
Jerry hated cheese. The man
was lactose intolerant.
154
00:07:05,430 --> 00:07:08,290
I don't know what to tell you,
Hank. The rules are the rules.
155
00:07:08,310 --> 00:07:09,770
You don't like them, you can leave.
156
00:07:09,850 --> 00:07:11,950
You do realize you're
all here voluntarily.
157
00:07:12,030 --> 00:07:14,790
What? We are?
158
00:07:14,830 --> 00:07:17,240
Yes. It's a retirement community,
159
00:07:17,250 --> 00:07:18,790
not an insane asylum.
160
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:22,090
My kids are liars.
161
00:07:23,570 --> 00:07:26,570
Well, voluntary or not, the rules stink.
162
00:07:26,650 --> 00:07:27,890
And what qualifies you
163
00:07:27,930 --> 00:07:30,850
to come up with these
rules anyway, Missy?
164
00:07:30,970 --> 00:07:32,410
I went to Harvard Business School.
165
00:07:32,450 --> 00:07:33,650
I never heard of it.
166
00:07:33,730 --> 00:07:35,310
You've never heard of Harvard?
167
00:07:35,350 --> 00:07:37,110
Oh, Harvard!
168
00:07:37,150 --> 00:07:41,130
I thought you said "Barnyard."
169
00:07:42,570 --> 00:07:44,950
I can't hear a thing today.
170
00:07:44,990 --> 00:07:47,710
That's a great school.
171
00:07:48,950 --> 00:07:51,490
All right, guys, time to
get out of my office.
172
00:07:51,530 --> 00:07:53,206
Well, if you're not gonna
let us throw a party,
173
00:07:53,230 --> 00:07:55,390
at least move what's-her-face
from our table.
174
00:07:55,430 --> 00:07:57,300
Who? Margaret?
175
00:07:57,330 --> 00:07:59,000
No, she can sit wherever she wants.
176
00:07:59,040 --> 00:08:00,400
There's nothing I can do about it.
177
00:08:00,430 --> 00:08:02,500
Oh, I get it.
178
00:08:02,540 --> 00:08:04,810
So you're saying there's
nothing you can do.
179
00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:07,310
- Right.
- So you want us to handle it.
180
00:08:07,340 --> 00:08:08,770
That's what you're saying.
181
00:08:08,790 --> 00:08:10,450
That's not at all what I'm saying.
182
00:08:10,470 --> 00:08:12,870
Ah, it's cool. I hear you, baby.
183
00:08:14,110 --> 00:08:15,730
I feel like you don't.
184
00:08:15,810 --> 00:08:17,870
Ah, I got it. Say no more.
185
00:08:18,310 --> 00:08:19,870
I feel like I should.
186
00:08:19,990 --> 00:08:22,350
Mm. Let's roll, boys.
187
00:08:23,730 --> 00:08:25,810
Walked right into that one, Harvard.
188
00:08:40,590 --> 00:08:42,280
You want me to flirt with her?
189
00:08:42,310 --> 00:08:43,980
I don't think I can do this.
190
00:08:44,010 --> 00:08:46,310
You want that woman sitting
at our table forever?
191
00:08:46,350 --> 00:08:47,750
Trust me, this'll work.
192
00:08:47,770 --> 00:08:52,150
But it should be you or Charlie
or at least somebody straight.
193
00:08:52,170 --> 00:08:55,360
Sid, only a gay man can hit
on a woman these days.
194
00:08:55,390 --> 00:08:58,360
If I so much as bump
into the side of a tata,
195
00:08:58,390 --> 00:09:00,810
I could wind up in jail for six years.
196
00:09:01,060 --> 00:09:03,670
I did six years in jail. Wasn't so bad.
197
00:09:03,690 --> 00:09:05,800
- I was in the best shape of my...
- Charlie.
198
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,460
Now, Sid, your mere presence
199
00:09:08,470 --> 00:09:09,690
makes most people uncomfortable.
200
00:09:09,710 --> 00:09:11,510
Now, all you got to do is, is take that
201
00:09:11,570 --> 00:09:13,210
and dial that up to, like, an 11.
202
00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:15,270
She'll be running to
another table in no time.
203
00:09:15,330 --> 00:09:17,140
Fine. Here goes nothing.
204
00:09:17,180 --> 00:09:19,770
I'll take off my glasses
so I look more butch.
205
00:09:31,230 --> 00:09:33,570
Well, hello, little lady.
206
00:09:36,310 --> 00:09:37,470
Are you all right?
207
00:09:38,510 --> 00:09:40,170
Do you mind if I join you?
208
00:09:40,950 --> 00:09:43,310
How can I resist?
209
00:09:51,370 --> 00:09:53,580
- Where are your friends?
- Well, they're not hiding,
210
00:09:53,620 --> 00:09:54,810
if that's what you're asking.
211
00:09:56,390 --> 00:09:58,270
I wasn't.
212
00:09:59,510 --> 00:10:02,100
So, I know a man is not supposed
213
00:10:02,150 --> 00:10:05,520
to say these things when sitting
with a woman these days,
214
00:10:05,550 --> 00:10:08,950
but if you really want Jerry's seat,
215
00:10:09,300 --> 00:10:11,690
I know a way you can earn it.
216
00:10:11,890 --> 00:10:13,190
Through me.
217
00:10:14,290 --> 00:10:16,040
Really?
218
00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:18,230
What would I have to do?
219
00:10:19,270 --> 00:10:21,350
Well, you know, uh,
220
00:10:21,630 --> 00:10:24,950
man-woman stuff.
221
00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:26,940
I don't know.
222
00:10:26,950 --> 00:10:28,690
Why don't you give me the details?
223
00:10:30,950 --> 00:10:32,780
Well, you know, when a...
224
00:10:33,090 --> 00:10:36,660
man takes a woman and
unhooks things and...
225
00:10:38,660 --> 00:10:40,660
... takes liberties with her person.
226
00:10:40,690 --> 00:10:41,950
You know the rest.
227
00:10:42,590 --> 00:10:44,930
No, still lost.
228
00:10:45,130 --> 00:10:47,100
He puts his lips on things,
229
00:10:47,150 --> 00:10:50,070
and-and his hands go everywhere.
230
00:10:50,130 --> 00:10:53,570
Cheese and crackers, don't
make me keep saying it!
231
00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:55,940
Well, all right.
232
00:10:55,980 --> 00:10:57,410
Why don't we go back to my room
233
00:10:57,440 --> 00:10:59,740
and you can show me instead?
234
00:10:59,780 --> 00:11:02,670
No, I think I made
myself perfectly clear.
235
00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,280
No, no, no, no, no, no. no
236
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:06,150
I want you to show me.
237
00:11:06,190 --> 00:11:07,990
Come on, lover boy.
238
00:11:08,020 --> 00:11:09,170
Get up.
239
00:11:16,340 --> 00:11:18,330
Well, maybe this will
work out in our favor.
240
00:11:18,340 --> 00:11:20,090
I mean, if you slept with Sid,
241
00:11:20,110 --> 00:11:21,986
would you really want to
sit next to him all day?
242
00:11:22,010 --> 00:11:24,010
It's Sid I'm worried about.
243
00:11:24,030 --> 00:11:27,370
If she goes anywhere near his
penis, his heart could explode.
244
00:11:28,370 --> 00:11:30,250
I've seen a man's heart explode once.
245
00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:31,550
It's not pretty.
246
00:11:31,580 --> 00:11:33,300
When did you see a man's heart explode?
247
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:35,046
How you gonna see that?
It's inside his body.
248
00:11:35,070 --> 00:11:36,790
Well, it-it came out!
249
00:11:37,260 --> 00:11:38,690
Way out!
250
00:11:38,730 --> 00:11:39,730
All right, all right, Charlie,
251
00:11:39,740 --> 00:11:42,650
I'm gonna stop asking you questions.
252
00:11:42,730 --> 00:11:44,760
So, three hours later,
253
00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:46,360
I wake up on the floor
254
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:49,370
next to a longshoreman, with
a rubber tube in my hand.
255
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:50,660
And I'm thinking to myself,
256
00:11:50,670 --> 00:11:52,850
"Did he get the enema or was it me?"?
257
00:11:52,870 --> 00:11:54,570
My God!
258
00:11:54,610 --> 00:11:56,950
I've been there!
259
00:11:56,970 --> 00:11:58,250
What the hell is this?
260
00:11:58,410 --> 00:12:00,380
Oh, speaking of enemas,
261
00:12:00,410 --> 00:12:02,730
look who just showed up.
262
00:12:03,510 --> 00:12:05,020
You told her, didn't you?
263
00:12:05,050 --> 00:12:07,330
I'm sorry, Hank. She
knew what I was doing
264
00:12:07,370 --> 00:12:08,610
and she flipped it on me.
265
00:12:08,630 --> 00:12:10,020
You were supposed to scare her away,
266
00:12:10,030 --> 00:12:11,810
not swap booty stories with her.
267
00:12:11,890 --> 00:12:13,970
She found my weakness.
268
00:12:14,010 --> 00:12:15,370
Come on, Sid, let's go.
269
00:12:15,390 --> 00:12:17,050
No, actually...
270
00:12:17,930 --> 00:12:19,610
I want to stay.
271
00:12:19,630 --> 00:12:21,050
You want to what?
272
00:12:21,130 --> 00:12:23,390
I want to hear the end of the story.
273
00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:27,090
Plus, I wouldn't mind hearing
the first part of that story.
274
00:12:27,170 --> 00:12:28,490
I can't believe you guys.
275
00:12:28,590 --> 00:12:31,500
You want to sit here eating
chips with this seat stealer?
276
00:12:31,530 --> 00:12:33,050
Then you go right ahead.
277
00:12:33,070 --> 00:12:35,690
I hope your guacamole
tastes like betrayal.
278
00:12:41,290 --> 00:12:43,050
$75!
279
00:12:43,090 --> 00:12:45,770
Do I hear $75 for a chance
280
00:12:45,790 --> 00:12:48,070
to sit at the best table
in all of Shady Meadows?
281
00:12:48,090 --> 00:12:49,350
$75.
282
00:12:49,490 --> 00:12:51,350
Dudley? No, man.
283
00:12:51,390 --> 00:12:52,650
You must be kidding me.
284
00:12:52,710 --> 00:12:54,650
Hank, what's all this about?
285
00:12:54,670 --> 00:12:57,040
Well, since you all are
disrespecting Jerry,
286
00:12:57,050 --> 00:12:59,040
I decided I'm gonna
auction off your seats
287
00:12:59,050 --> 00:13:01,530
so I can raise money to pay
for his memorial service.
288
00:13:01,670 --> 00:13:04,430
What? You can't sell our seats.
289
00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:05,610
$90.
290
00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:06,740
$95.
291
00:13:06,780 --> 00:13:07,940
$100.
292
00:13:07,980 --> 00:13:09,710
- $110.
- $115.
293
00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:11,410
$1 million.
294
00:13:11,850 --> 00:13:15,240
That's too steep for me. I'm out.
295
00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:17,330
You know you don't have
no million dollars.
296
00:13:17,350 --> 00:13:19,350
Well, not on me. But
if you got a shovel,
297
00:13:19,370 --> 00:13:21,510
we can go out to the desert.
298
00:13:22,990 --> 00:13:24,670
Who is this fossil?
299
00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,300
That's Phillips. That's his chair now.
300
00:13:27,330 --> 00:13:29,340
He paid $11 for that seat.
301
00:13:38,980 --> 00:13:41,050
I don't need this!
302
00:13:41,090 --> 00:13:42,390
I'm out of here!
303
00:13:42,510 --> 00:13:44,470
No refunds, Phillips!
304
00:13:45,470 --> 00:13:47,950
Woman, you are working my last nerve.
305
00:13:47,990 --> 00:13:49,820
Hank, maybe it's time to let it go.
306
00:13:49,850 --> 00:13:52,330
We're not gonna have a big party.
307
00:13:52,510 --> 00:13:54,460
We're just gonna sit here,
308
00:13:54,470 --> 00:13:56,050
eat cheese, break wind,
309
00:13:56,060 --> 00:13:57,770
and stare at Jerry's ashes.
310
00:13:57,810 --> 00:13:59,260
Wait, hold up now. Ashes?
311
00:13:59,300 --> 00:14:00,730
They can't cremate Jerry.
312
00:14:00,810 --> 00:14:03,190
- Why not?
- The man is Irish.
313
00:14:03,230 --> 00:14:05,910
And the Irish like their
dead bodies in a open box
314
00:14:05,930 --> 00:14:07,140
in the middle of a bar.
315
00:14:07,170 --> 00:14:08,640
Then they drink whiskey,
316
00:14:08,670 --> 00:14:10,610
then they sing songs, then
they fight each other.
317
00:14:10,640 --> 00:14:12,390
Sometimes they fight the dead body.
318
00:14:14,290 --> 00:14:16,510
What the hell are you saying?
319
00:14:16,550 --> 00:14:18,810
I'm saying we got to hop in a cab
320
00:14:18,870 --> 00:14:20,006
and go on down to that morgue
321
00:14:20,030 --> 00:14:21,470
and get Jerry the hell out of there.
322
00:14:21,530 --> 00:14:24,130
Have you lost your ever-loving mind?
323
00:14:24,170 --> 00:14:25,950
We can't do that.
324
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:29,650
Plus, no cab driver will let
you transport a dead body.
325
00:14:29,730 --> 00:14:32,970
I did it all the time when I was
a rickshaw driver in Bangkok.
326
00:14:33,510 --> 00:14:36,490
Charlie, I'm gonna take my thumb,
327
00:14:36,510 --> 00:14:37,910
I'm gonna push it on your eyeball
328
00:14:37,950 --> 00:14:39,870
till it pops out your ear.
329
00:14:40,700 --> 00:14:42,720
Now, does anybody here
have a... have a car?
330
00:14:42,730 --> 00:14:44,090
I can drive you guys.
331
00:14:44,130 --> 00:14:45,970
Ah, hell, no. Anybody else?
332
00:14:46,210 --> 00:14:48,220
I can drive if you guys tell me
333
00:14:48,250 --> 00:14:50,210
what I'm seeing out the windshield.
334
00:14:51,170 --> 00:14:52,490
It's your life.
335
00:14:52,910 --> 00:14:55,350
Okay, fine, but this
doesn't make us friends.
336
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:57,070
And I'm driving.
337
00:14:59,870 --> 00:15:02,420
- Watch your blind spot.
- All right.
338
00:15:02,460 --> 00:15:04,860
- She's braking.
- Mm-hmm.
339
00:15:04,900 --> 00:15:05,990
Pull over...
340
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:09,270
Man, Sid, why you got to sit like that?
341
00:15:09,290 --> 00:15:10,430
You're blocking my view.
342
00:15:10,470 --> 00:15:12,230
Well, I can't see out the window
343
00:15:12,270 --> 00:15:13,770
if I sit in the seat.
344
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:15,670
Margaret's blocking my view.
345
00:15:15,710 --> 00:15:17,470
Do you have to see out the front window?
346
00:15:17,490 --> 00:15:20,080
It's a car; they have
windows on the sides.
347
00:15:20,090 --> 00:15:21,950
I get motion sickness.
348
00:15:21,990 --> 00:15:23,470
I'm scared I'll spit up.
349
00:15:23,490 --> 00:15:25,590
Don't you spit up on me.
350
00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,630
You really have to slow down, Hank.
351
00:15:27,650 --> 00:15:29,000
You're going too fast.
352
00:15:29,030 --> 00:15:30,226
Well, it's too late for all that.
353
00:15:30,250 --> 00:15:31,866
They're probably popping
Jerry in the oven
354
00:15:31,890 --> 00:15:33,080
- as we speak.
- Oh.
355
00:15:33,090 --> 00:15:34,800
And that said, how fast am I going?
356
00:15:34,820 --> 00:15:36,590
Which one of these dials
is your speedometer?
357
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:38,090
I don't know.
358
00:15:38,130 --> 00:15:40,210
You don't know how to read
your own speedometer?
359
00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:41,890
It's not my car.
360
00:15:41,930 --> 00:15:43,600
Well, whose car is it, then?
361
00:15:43,630 --> 00:15:45,930
It's that Dudley guy's;
I swiped his key.
362
00:15:45,970 --> 00:15:47,810
I thought you said you had a car.
363
00:15:47,850 --> 00:15:49,600
I said I could drive a car.
364
00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:51,200
I never said that I had one.
365
00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:52,780
So I'm driving a stolen car.
366
00:15:54,190 --> 00:15:55,586
Oh, Lord, we're getting pulled over.
367
00:15:55,610 --> 00:15:59,230
I told you to slow down.
368
00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:02,110
Oh, this is no good.
369
00:16:02,150 --> 00:16:05,450
A black man in a stolen
car with a white woman?
370
00:16:05,970 --> 00:16:07,340
All right, everybody just relax,
371
00:16:07,350 --> 00:16:08,930
act like we have Alzheimer's.
372
00:16:15,590 --> 00:16:19,510
Well, the good news is they
bought your dementia story.
373
00:16:19,990 --> 00:16:21,310
The bad news is,
374
00:16:21,350 --> 00:16:23,170
Jerry has seen better days.
375
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:25,640
Oh, I don't know. I think
he looks good in red.
376
00:16:25,670 --> 00:16:27,040
Woman, don't you start with me.
377
00:16:27,050 --> 00:16:28,470
This is all your fault.
378
00:16:28,510 --> 00:16:30,160
From the moment you came up in here,
379
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,426
ain't been nothing but trouble.
380
00:16:31,450 --> 00:16:33,980
'Cause of you, Jerry will
never get his open casket.
381
00:16:34,020 --> 00:16:35,650
Why don't you just flip the lid?
382
00:16:35,710 --> 00:16:37,280
Eh, don't you touch him.
383
00:16:37,320 --> 00:16:39,150
Don't you touch him.
384
00:16:39,190 --> 00:16:41,910
Shoot, knowing you,
you're liable to drop him.
385
00:16:42,020 --> 00:16:45,090
No!
386
00:16:45,130 --> 00:16:47,310
Oh.
387
00:16:47,390 --> 00:16:50,610
Boy, you don't see that every day.
388
00:16:51,570 --> 00:16:53,330
Maybe I can find a broom,
389
00:16:53,370 --> 00:16:55,990
we could sweep him into
a little zip-it bag.
390
00:16:56,070 --> 00:16:57,670
The-the Dag zip-it?
391
00:16:57,910 --> 00:16:59,870
They put the zip-it a thunda snug.
392
00:16:59,950 --> 00:17:01,590
He's talking gibberish.
393
00:17:01,630 --> 00:17:03,620
I-Is he having a stroke?
394
00:17:03,630 --> 00:17:06,510
He might be. I say it's
best we all just walk away.
395
00:17:06,550 --> 00:17:09,180
We aren't getting the Jerry
pieces back in the bottle.
396
00:17:09,220 --> 00:17:11,120
Get... Bring-bring... get-get the glue
397
00:17:11,150 --> 00:17:14,370
with-with the thing on
it, man. Oh, Lord.
398
00:17:22,370 --> 00:17:25,510
Okay, Jerry, I'm gonna rent a cannon,
399
00:17:25,540 --> 00:17:28,460
then we'll tuck you inside,
then I'm gonna blast you
400
00:17:28,470 --> 00:17:31,110
right upside that woman's head.
401
00:17:32,190 --> 00:17:35,250
You know, Hank, I think
it's time to let it go.
402
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:37,350
You know, when I was in the Navy,
403
00:17:37,390 --> 00:17:39,090
I had a little saying:
404
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:42,870
"When the sea gets choppy,
don't go on the boat."
405
00:17:43,630 --> 00:17:45,390
Of course, the sea is always choppy,
406
00:17:45,430 --> 00:17:47,030
so I got a dishonorable discharge
407
00:17:47,050 --> 00:17:48,560
for dereliction of duties.
408
00:17:48,890 --> 00:17:52,130
I had a whole different
saying about the Navy.
409
00:17:56,510 --> 00:18:00,050
But now's not the time or the place.
410
00:18:01,050 --> 00:18:03,810
Now, Hank, my point is that
411
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,950
I don't think you're mad at that woman.
412
00:18:06,980 --> 00:18:09,550
And I don't think you're
mad about Jerry's party.
413
00:18:09,870 --> 00:18:11,250
I think you're scared.
414
00:18:11,290 --> 00:18:13,290
We all are.
415
00:18:13,530 --> 00:18:17,090
'Cause one day it's gonna
be about our crappy party
416
00:18:17,130 --> 00:18:19,830
and who gets to sit in our seat.
417
00:18:19,860 --> 00:18:23,500
And just like that... we're forgotten.
418
00:18:23,530 --> 00:18:25,390
You know, Charlie,
419
00:18:25,410 --> 00:18:27,630
that's the most lucid thing
I've ever heard you say.
420
00:18:27,650 --> 00:18:28,650
Thank you.
421
00:18:28,670 --> 00:18:31,990
And you are 100% incorrect!
422
00:18:32,890 --> 00:18:35,940
You guys remember when I lost my
wife to the big man upstairs?
423
00:18:36,050 --> 00:18:37,910
I thought your wife left you.
424
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:40,780
She did... for the
retired football player
425
00:18:40,790 --> 00:18:43,050
who lived in the penthouse.
426
00:18:43,090 --> 00:18:46,210
See, that's when I moved in
here and I met you guys.
427
00:18:46,990 --> 00:18:49,920
I tell you what, Jerry,
even at my lowest,
428
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:52,360
he showed me that life
could still be fun.
429
00:18:53,150 --> 00:18:56,030
And if I'm scared, maybe I'm just scared
430
00:18:56,060 --> 00:18:58,900
that it's not gonna be any
fun around here anymore,
431
00:18:58,930 --> 00:19:00,230
now that Jerry's gone.
432
00:19:00,450 --> 00:19:03,970
Well, maybe we don't
need Jerry to have fun.
433
00:19:04,250 --> 00:19:06,810
Hell, we had one heck of
a day with that woman.
434
00:19:09,270 --> 00:19:12,540
Jerry never got us arrested.
435
00:19:13,190 --> 00:19:16,080
Yeah, he never stole a
car, and that was fun.
436
00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:19,390
Yeah, but that woman, she
just gets under my skin.
437
00:19:19,420 --> 00:19:22,090
Well, Jerry got under everybody's skin.
438
00:19:22,670 --> 00:19:25,290
He used to replace my beta blockers
439
00:19:25,330 --> 00:19:26,910
with boner pills.
440
00:19:28,530 --> 00:19:29,960
It was a joke.
441
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,160
Not to my poor little pecker.
442
00:19:33,150 --> 00:19:35,040
Okay. Okay, Sid.
443
00:19:36,540 --> 00:19:38,830
What the hell is that?
444
00:19:45,370 --> 00:19:48,130
_
445
00:19:49,970 --> 00:19:51,950
Oh, I'm sorry, you guys
can't come in here.
446
00:19:51,970 --> 00:19:53,370
You have to be invited.
447
00:19:54,370 --> 00:19:55,920
I'm just kidding.
448
00:19:55,950 --> 00:19:58,410
Surprise. Here's your party.
449
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,690
This was you? You did this?
450
00:20:00,860 --> 00:20:02,410
You're welcome.
451
00:20:02,630 --> 00:20:04,610
How? What did you tell Allison?
452
00:20:04,630 --> 00:20:06,770
Well, I said, "Please let me throw
453
00:20:06,790 --> 00:20:08,200
"this party for the boys.
454
00:20:08,230 --> 00:20:11,380
"I mean, I'm here all alone and
nobody likes me very much.
455
00:20:11,410 --> 00:20:13,690
Please."
456
00:20:13,810 --> 00:20:15,510
- And that worked?
- No.
457
00:20:15,540 --> 00:20:18,130
So I slipped her a sleeping
pill and knocked the bitch out.
458
00:20:19,410 --> 00:20:20,820
See?
459
00:20:20,830 --> 00:20:23,480
She's way more fun than Jerry.
460
00:20:23,550 --> 00:20:25,980
You know, I talked everything
over with the guys,
461
00:20:26,020 --> 00:20:27,350
and despite their objections,
462
00:20:27,390 --> 00:20:28,870
I think you should take Jerry's seat.
463
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:31,620
- Well, I accept.
- On a probationary basis.
464
00:20:31,630 --> 00:20:32,866
Just as long as you know, I'm still
465
00:20:32,890 --> 00:20:34,306
gonna be calling the shots around here.
466
00:20:34,330 --> 00:20:36,060
Well, we'll-we'll see about that.
467
00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:38,030
What-what do you mean by
"we'll see about that"?
468
00:20:38,060 --> 00:20:40,400
- Never mind.
- What? No, I changed my mind.
469
00:20:40,410 --> 00:20:41,410
- We shouldn't be doing this.
- Ah.
470
00:20:41,420 --> 00:20:42,746
You know, I think I
might take your chair.
471
00:20:42,770 --> 00:20:44,010
I believe it has a better view.
472
00:20:44,070 --> 00:20:45,700
N-N-N-N-N-No. Nah. Uh-uh.
473
00:20:47,410 --> 00:20:49,510
She can't put the, put-put
the, put the thing
474
00:20:49,540 --> 00:20:50,550
on the, on the moova.
475
00:20:55,570 --> 00:20:57,210
So there I am,
476
00:20:57,250 --> 00:20:59,720
halftime at the Super Bowl
operating camera five,
477
00:20:59,750 --> 00:21:01,640
and I... and over my headset I hear,
478
00:21:01,650 --> 00:21:02,970
"Cut to Janet Jackson."
479
00:21:06,390 --> 00:21:08,270
Excuse me, Ms. Walsh?
480
00:21:08,330 --> 00:21:10,260
Oh, you can call me Jerry.
481
00:21:10,290 --> 00:21:12,730
I hate to bother you, but your
credit card has been declined.
482
00:21:12,750 --> 00:21:14,690
Oh, no, there must be some mistake.
483
00:21:14,710 --> 00:21:16,330
I've tried it several times.
484
00:21:16,370 --> 00:21:18,230
All right. Well, hold your horses.
485
00:21:18,270 --> 00:21:20,070
I'll get you a different c-card.
486
00:21:20,110 --> 00:21:21,900
I'm gonna go, uh, get my...
487
00:21:21,940 --> 00:21:23,770
I'm gonna... Run!
488
00:21:27,650 --> 00:21:30,450
Sir? Oh!
489
00:21:30,590 --> 00:21:31,590
That's pretty good.
490
00:21:31,591 --> 00:21:36,590
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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