Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:25,338 --> 00:00:27,072
You got something on your mind?
2
00:00:27,072 --> 00:00:28,081
It's Joe.
3
00:00:28,081 --> 00:00:29,866
Tonight's our six-month anniversary,
4
00:00:29,866 --> 00:00:31,787
but we can't celebrate until next week
5
00:00:31,787 --> 00:00:33,489
because he's flying to Las Vegas
6
00:00:33,489 --> 00:00:34,537
with his buddies.
7
00:00:34,537 --> 00:00:35,954
Oh, Vegas, huh?
8
00:00:35,954 --> 00:00:36,648
Great!
9
00:00:36,648 --> 00:00:37,684
Well, tell him not to miss the show
10
00:00:37,684 --> 00:00:39,057
at the Diamond Lounge:
11
00:00:39,057 --> 00:00:42,393
a Topless History of the World!
12
00:00:42,393 --> 00:00:44,025
If they've still got the same Bathsheeba
13
00:00:44,025 --> 00:00:46,217
he's in for a real treat!
14
00:00:46,217 --> 00:00:46,735
Oh yes,
15
00:00:46,735 --> 00:00:49,483
that's just where I want Joe
spending our anniversary,
16
00:00:49,483 --> 00:00:51,577
some smutty show in Vegas!
17
00:00:51,577 --> 00:00:54,945
No, it's very tasteful and
historically accurate.
18
00:00:54,945 --> 00:00:56,835
Except at the end, where Eleanor Roosevelt
19
00:00:56,835 --> 00:01:05,010
and Eva Braun settle World War Two
by wrestling in pudding.
20
00:01:05,010 --> 00:01:05,951
Hello, Dr. Crane.
21
00:01:05,951 --> 00:01:06,704
Daphne.
22
00:01:06,704 --> 00:01:07,225
Oh, Niles.
23
00:01:07,225 --> 00:01:08,354
To what do we owe this pleasure?
24
00:01:08,354 --> 00:01:11,326
To an unscrupulous art dealer
who's trying to rob me blind.
25
00:01:11,326 --> 00:01:13,069
Last night, I was at a gallery opening, and
26
00:01:13,069 --> 00:01:15,251
Niles, is this going to be a long story?
27
00:01:15,251 --> 00:01:16,079
Moderately.
28
00:01:16,079 --> 00:01:19,174
Walk-and-talk.
29
00:01:19,174 --> 00:01:20,845
Anyway, I was at this opening,
in conversation,
30
00:01:20,845 --> 00:01:24,139
when I made a rather emphatic
point about pointillism,
31
00:01:24,139 --> 00:01:26,116
when I lost the grip on my canap and found that
32
00:01:26,116 --> 00:01:27,403
it became airborne!
33
00:01:27,403 --> 00:01:30,243
Well, the next thing I know
I'm being confronted by
34
00:01:30,243 --> 00:01:31,973
an irate gallery owner who's demanding
35
00:01:31,973 --> 00:01:35,326
I reimburse him for the damage
to one of his paintings!
36
00:01:35,326 --> 00:01:37,204
How he could notice a fleck of foie gras on a
37
00:01:37,204 --> 00:01:40,782
Jackson Pollock is beyond me.
38
00:01:40,782 --> 00:01:41,495
He's getting an estimate,
39
00:01:41,495 --> 00:01:42,423
and just to protect myself,
40
00:01:42,423 --> 00:01:44,924
I seem to recall you knowing a
trustworthy art restorer?
41
00:01:44,924 --> 00:01:46,365
Oh yes, I do, actually.
42
00:01:46,365 --> 00:01:47,701
Saved my life last year when Eddie
43
00:01:47,701 --> 00:01:50,192
licked my Liechtenstein!
44
00:01:50,192 --> 00:01:50,965
I'll get you his card.
45
00:01:50,965 --> 00:01:53,424
Oh, thank you.
46
00:01:53,424 --> 00:01:54,333
You free for lunch today?
47
00:01:54,333 --> 00:01:55,680
Oh, sadly, no.
48
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:58,008
The radio station is subjecting my program
49
00:01:58,008 --> 00:02:02,149
to something they call a
"focus group" this afternoon.
50
00:02:02,149 --> 00:02:02,915
Dinner, perhaps?
51
00:02:02,915 --> 00:02:03,919
Oh, perfect.
52
00:02:03,919 --> 00:02:05,662
And what exactly is a focus group?
53
00:02:05,662 --> 00:02:09,071
Well, they actually drag a pack
of people off the street and
54
00:02:09,071 --> 00:02:10,023
make them listen to my program,
55
00:02:10,023 --> 00:02:12,054
and then dutifully record
their opinions about it.
56
00:02:12,054 --> 00:02:12,959
How demeaning!
57
00:02:12,959 --> 00:02:14,076
Oh, absolutely.
58
00:02:14,076 --> 00:02:15,575
Can you imagine Sigmund Freud being dragged
59
00:02:15,575 --> 00:02:17,908
into a roomful of Viennese
laymen to hear remarks like,
60
00:02:17,908 --> 00:02:21,524
"hate that Oedipal thing, but,
oh, love the penis envy!"
61
00:02:21,524 --> 00:02:23,598
I mean, really!
62
00:02:23,598 --> 00:02:25,007
The worst thing is that they may change
63
00:02:25,007 --> 00:02:28,619
my show in deference to the
opinion of Joe Six-Pack!
64
00:02:28,619 --> 00:02:29,596
You're worrying too much.
65
00:02:29,596 --> 00:02:31,799
I was on a focus group once.
66
00:02:31,799 --> 00:02:38,045
That sound you hear is a nail
being hammered into my coffin.
67
00:02:38,045 --> 00:02:39,945
They were trying out a new frozen snack.
68
00:02:39,945 --> 00:02:46,781
It was a meatball with the cheese
injected right in the middle.
69
00:02:46,781 --> 00:02:53,835
Just as nature intended.
70
00:02:53,835 --> 00:02:56,182
Dr. Niles Crane. Ah.
71
00:02:56,182 --> 00:02:58,988
So, you have the estimate?
72
00:02:58,988 --> 00:03:00,421
What?
73
00:03:00,421 --> 00:03:07,437
Four thousand dollars, to remove
a miniscule gobbet of duck liver?!
74
00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:10,724
I could do the same thing with a
Q-tip and some club seltzer!
75
00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:12,774
Oh well, you may very well
say "pay up or else,"
76
00:03:12,774 --> 00:03:15,428
but I have something to say to you?
77
00:03:15,428 --> 00:03:18,527
Yeah, well at least I wasn't
fooling around with the babysitter!
78
00:03:18,527 --> 00:03:19,240
Shut up!
79
00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,776
No, you shut up!
80
00:03:20,776 --> 00:03:23,292
Oh please, I have enough aggravation
without having to listen
81
00:03:23,292 --> 00:03:24,974
to a stupid talk show!
82
00:03:24,974 --> 00:03:27,308
I swear, the only life forms
lower than the people
83
00:03:27,308 --> 00:03:30,586
who appear on those shows are
the ones who watch them!
84
00:03:30,586 --> 00:03:31,659
Like me?
85
00:03:31,659 --> 00:03:32,634
What?
86
00:03:32,634 --> 00:03:34,236
Oh no, I didn't realize?
87
00:03:34,236 --> 00:03:36,805
No, no, no, that's quite all right.
88
00:03:36,805 --> 00:03:38,862
Although I do find it interesting that
89
00:03:38,862 --> 00:03:41,411
I get criticized for listening
to people's problems,
90
00:03:41,411 --> 00:03:44,141
when all you do is get rich from it.
91
00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:45,550
Surely, Daphne, even you can see
the difference between cheap
92
00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:48,399
sensationalism and the practice of psychiatry.
93
00:03:48,399 --> 00:03:50,508
Oh, "even me?"
94
00:03:50,508 --> 00:03:52,796
As in, "even feeble-minded Daphne?!"
95
00:03:52,796 --> 00:03:54,812
Well, I'll tell you what I can
tell the difference between:
96
00:03:54,812 --> 00:03:57,837
a true gentleman and a condescending prig!
97
00:03:57,837 --> 00:04:00,659
I... am NOT!
98
00:04:00,659 --> 00:04:04,244
He said priggishly.
99
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:06,381
Forgive me if I'm not as down to earth
100
00:04:06,381 --> 00:04:10,300
as you and your tattooed, muu-muu wearing brethren!
101
00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:11,685
You pompous twit!
102
00:04:11,685 --> 00:04:12,715
Couch zombie!
103
00:04:12,715 --> 00:04:13,659
Snob!
104
00:04:13,659 --> 00:04:14,290
Brat!
105
00:04:14,290 --> 00:04:15,042
Oh, shut up!
106
00:04:15,042 --> 00:04:16,841
No, YOU shut up!
107
00:04:16,841 --> 00:04:22,002
I'm glad we turned off the TV.
108
00:04:22,002 --> 00:04:25,012
Oh, Dr. Crane, I'm so sorry!
109
00:04:25,012 --> 00:04:26,467
I'm just so upset at Joe!
110
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:27,779
I didn't mean a word of it!
111
00:04:27,779 --> 00:04:28,603
Daphne, I apologize?
112
00:04:28,603 --> 00:04:30,961
Oh no, it was my fault?
113
00:04:30,961 --> 00:04:31,779
I called you a couch zombie?
114
00:04:31,779 --> 00:04:34,141
No, please?
115
00:04:34,141 --> 00:04:34,940
Friends?
116
00:04:34,940 --> 00:04:42,995
Oh, of course.
117
00:04:42,995 --> 00:04:44,800
Niles, what was that all about?
118
00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:45,594
I'm not sure.
119
00:04:45,594 --> 00:04:52,500
But, oh, mama, it was glorious!
120
00:04:52,500 --> 00:04:55,946
Blood-pounding, sarcastic zingers flying!
121
00:04:55,946 --> 00:04:58,259
Are you saying you that enjoyed
fighting with Daphne?
122
00:04:58,259 --> 00:05:00,237
Every exhilarating moment!
123
00:05:00,237 --> 00:05:01,949
It was pure, unbridled passion!
124
00:05:01,949 --> 00:05:09,172
I think I still have some of her
spittle on my forehead!
125
00:05:09,172 --> 00:05:12,060
Oh, why did Dad ever tell us
not to fight with girls?
126
00:05:12,060 --> 00:05:14,292
It's wonderful!
127
00:05:14,292 --> 00:05:15,654
The friction between us?
128
00:05:15,654 --> 00:05:17,489
Niles, is this going to be a long description?
129
00:05:17,489 --> 00:05:18,281
Very!
130
00:05:18,281 --> 00:05:20,654
Walk-and-talk.
131
00:05:28,101 --> 00:05:30,153
By showering a reluctant girlfriend with gifts,
132
00:05:30,153 --> 00:05:33,425
Billy, you're applying a band-aid
to a gaping wound.
133
00:05:33,425 --> 00:05:34,371
My advice is to find someone
134
00:05:34,371 --> 00:05:35,800
who will return your worthy affection,
135
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:41,137
or your wallet, as well as your
bed, will be empty.
136
00:05:41,137 --> 00:05:42,210
I see we're out of time.
137
00:05:42,210 --> 00:05:43,251
Thank you for listening.
138
00:05:43,251 --> 00:05:48,020
This is Dr. Frasier Crane, wishing
you all good mental health.
139
00:05:48,020 --> 00:05:51,545
OK, let's talk about Dr. Crane's show.
140
00:05:51,545 --> 00:05:53,650
Oh, I know you've been eyeing this two-way mirror,
141
00:05:53,650 --> 00:05:56,131
but the other people behind
there are data consultants,
142
00:05:56,131 --> 00:05:57,849
so please speak freely.
143
00:05:57,849 --> 00:06:00,340
There's no one involved with the
show whose feelings could be hurt.
144
00:06:00,340 --> 00:06:03,771
If anybody says anything bad
about me, I'll kill myself!
145
00:06:03,771 --> 00:06:04,931
Now, Roz, relax.
146
00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:06,072
We do a perfectly good show.
147
00:06:06,072 --> 00:06:07,864
We're not going to change it one iota.
148
00:06:07,864 --> 00:06:10,730
Only a fool would listen to the
opinion of every Tom, Dick, and Harry.
149
00:06:10,730 --> 00:06:12,548
I liked everything about it.
150
00:06:12,548 --> 00:06:15,539
On the other hand, it's good
to keep an open mind.
151
00:06:15,539 --> 00:06:16,771
I like that Roz.
152
00:06:16,771 --> 00:06:19,161
I think her voice is really sexy,
153
00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:21,804
especially that throaty laugh of hers.
154
00:06:21,804 --> 00:06:23,255
Wow, that's nice.
155
00:06:23,255 --> 00:06:25,359
I didn't know I had a throaty laugh.
156
00:06:25,359 --> 00:06:26,115
You do.
157
00:06:26,115 --> 00:06:27,715
I've noticed it too.
158
00:06:27,715 --> 00:06:35,192
Really? Oh, you.
159
00:06:35,192 --> 00:06:38,183
The stuff he says really seems
to make a lot of sense.
160
00:06:38,183 --> 00:06:39,602
Yeah, it's funny.
161
00:06:39,602 --> 00:06:41,024
I mean, he takes his callers seriously,
162
00:06:41,024 --> 00:06:42,794
but he can kid around with them too.
163
00:06:42,794 --> 00:06:44,481
Yeah, I listen to a lot of radio,
164
00:06:44,481 --> 00:06:48,306
and I think this is a great show.
165
00:06:48,306 --> 00:06:53,110
Well, I just don't know how much
more of this I can listen to!
166
00:06:53,110 --> 00:06:55,486
Manu, I notice you've been quiet.
167
00:06:55,486 --> 00:06:57,049
Uh, do you have something to say?
168
00:06:57,049 --> 00:07:00,585
Me? No.
169
00:07:00,585 --> 00:07:03,878
We'd like to hear your opinion of the program.
170
00:07:03,878 --> 00:07:06,526
Well, it... I don't know.
171
00:07:06,526 --> 00:07:14,408
Something about... I don't like it.
172
00:07:14,408 --> 00:07:19,521
Well, who is this cheeky nonconformist?
173
00:07:19,521 --> 00:07:22,514
Well, let's see, his name is Manu Habib, married,
174
00:07:22,514 --> 00:07:25,296
no children, owns his own newsstand.
175
00:07:25,296 --> 00:07:29,865
Wow, that is so weird, to hear
someone's whole life summed up like that.
176
00:07:29,865 --> 00:07:38,495
"Roz Doyle, Radio Producer, single."
177
00:07:38,495 --> 00:07:40,926
Well, getting back to your thoughts, Manu,
178
00:07:40,926 --> 00:07:43,533
you said there was something about
the program you didn't like.
179
00:07:43,533 --> 00:07:47,713
Can you be more specific.
180
00:07:47,713 --> 00:07:51,703
I don't like him.
181
00:07:51,703 --> 00:07:53,168
Why?
182
00:07:53,168 --> 00:07:54,015
I don't know.
183
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:56,205
I just don't like him.
184
00:07:56,205 --> 00:07:56,792
Oh, I do.
185
00:07:56,792 --> 00:07:58,102
I'm gonna start listening to him all the time.
186
00:07:58,102 --> 00:08:01,998
It's a great show.
187
00:08:01,998 --> 00:08:04,381
My God, Frasier, this is a love-fest!
188
00:08:04,381 --> 00:08:06,330
I can't believe we were even worried about it.
189
00:08:06,330 --> 00:08:10,467
"I just don't like him." Hmm...
190
00:08:10,467 --> 00:08:11,612
Well, looks like our coffee's here.
191
00:08:11,612 --> 00:08:14,742
Why don't we take a quick break, OK?
192
00:08:14,742 --> 00:08:15,666
Hey, sports fans!
193
00:08:15,666 --> 00:08:16,741
How's it going in here?
194
00:08:16,741 --> 00:08:18,726
Bulldog, I thought they were
testing your show across the hall?
195
00:08:18,726 --> 00:08:19,941
Oh, yeah, they are.
196
00:08:19,941 --> 00:08:22,306
But after ten minutes it's
just the same-old, same-old.
197
00:08:22,306 --> 00:08:25,287
Guys love me, chicks pretend not to.
198
00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:29,875
Whoa, your group's even uglier than mine!
199
00:08:29,875 --> 00:08:30,940
Would you knock it off?
200
00:08:30,940 --> 00:08:32,084
These people happen to like us.
201
00:08:32,084 --> 00:08:32,950
Oh, will you guys lighten up?
202
00:08:32,950 --> 00:08:34,830
You got to get in the spirit of things.
203
00:08:34,830 --> 00:08:35,875
Hey, hey!
204
00:08:35,875 --> 00:08:40,454
This is great, I live for a moment like this.
205
00:08:40,454 --> 00:08:41,340
That's right, that's right,
206
00:08:41,340 --> 00:08:43,178
go for it, right there, right there.
207
00:08:43,178 --> 00:08:44,637
Bulldog?
208
00:08:44,637 --> 00:08:46,594
As long as you're in there
you might as well go after the
209
00:08:46,594 --> 00:08:48,436
Huevos Rancheros you had for breakfast!
210
00:08:48,436 --> 00:08:49,652
Oh, stop it!
211
00:08:49,652 --> 00:08:51,659
Hey, ten bucks says he eats what he finds.
212
00:08:51,659 --> 00:08:52,531
Oh, that's disgusting!
213
00:08:52,531 --> 00:08:55,931
Come on, come on, come on, come o
214
00:08:55,931 --> 00:08:58,226
BINGO!
215
00:08:58,226 --> 00:09:03,024
Do I know these people or what?!
216
00:09:05,325 --> 00:09:05,833
Hi, Niles.
217
00:09:05,833 --> 00:09:07,178
Hey, Dad.
218
00:09:07,178 --> 00:09:09,217
May I assume from your dress windbreaker that
219
00:09:09,217 --> 00:09:11,988
you'll be joining us for dinner?
220
00:09:11,988 --> 00:09:14,546
Yep, but I'm making a pitch
that we eat at the Timber Mill.
221
00:09:14,546 --> 00:09:16,995
I got a coupon from there that expires tomorrow.
222
00:09:16,995 --> 00:09:21,740
Oh. If I dine there tonight, so may I.
223
00:09:21,740 --> 00:09:23,484
Hello, Dr. Crane.
224
00:09:23,484 --> 00:09:28,224
Oh, there's the British bobcat!
225
00:09:28,224 --> 00:09:29,498
Now, look, she's still a little bit over
226
00:09:29,498 --> 00:09:31,058
the edge about this Joe thing.
227
00:09:31,058 --> 00:09:32,507
So you better watch your step or you're gonna
228
00:09:32,507 --> 00:09:34,452
have a repeat of this morning.
229
00:09:34,452 --> 00:09:37,996
We wouldn't want that, would we?
230
00:09:37,996 --> 00:09:40,649
Chips, Daphne? Was that wise?
231
00:09:40,649 --> 00:09:41,656
What do you mean?
232
00:09:41,656 --> 00:09:46,791
You know what they say,
"many chips make for chunky hips."
233
00:09:46,791 --> 00:09:52,604
Waddle, waddle, waddle!
234
00:09:52,604 --> 00:09:53,937
Have you lost your mind?!
235
00:09:53,937 --> 00:09:57,089
Oh, no, no, I'm glad if I put on a few pounds.
236
00:09:57,089 --> 00:10:01,408
Now maybe Joe will stop
nagging me to plump up!
237
00:10:01,408 --> 00:10:03,783
Hey, Fras, how was the focus group?
238
00:10:03,783 --> 00:10:05,321
Fine, I guess.
239
00:10:05,321 --> 00:10:08,207
Oh, well, you said yourself
they didn't mean anything.
240
00:10:08,207 --> 00:10:09,481
Yes, well, it's one thing to say that.
241
00:10:09,481 --> 00:10:13,570
It's another to sit there
being personally attacked!
242
00:10:13,570 --> 00:10:15,327
One man actually said,
243
00:10:15,327 --> 00:10:18,550
"I just don't like him."
244
00:10:18,550 --> 00:10:30,511
Only one?
245
00:10:30,511 --> 00:10:33,089
I'm sure someone must have said something nice.
246
00:10:33,089 --> 00:10:35,985
Well, all the other eleven had
nothing but high praise.
247
00:10:35,985 --> 00:10:37,344
Eleven out of twelve liked you?
248
00:10:37,344 --> 00:10:38,560
You should be thrilled!
249
00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:41,050
F..DR didn't have that kind of approval rating.
250
00:10:41,050 --> 00:10:42,959
Yes, or Churchill for that matter.
251
00:10:42,959 --> 00:10:50,327
Churchill that cigar-chomping
gin blossom with a face attached!
252
00:10:50,327 --> 00:10:51,623
You're right about that.
253
00:10:51,623 --> 00:10:58,192
There's a kiss hello to put you off your tea.
254
00:10:58,192 --> 00:11:00,217
I wish I was able to talk to
this man and ask him what it is
255
00:11:00,217 --> 00:11:01,921
about me that he doesn't like.
256
00:11:01,921 --> 00:11:03,625
But, I-I can't, you see, he was told that
257
00:11:03,625 --> 00:11:05,656
his comments would be kept confidential.
258
00:11:05,656 --> 00:11:06,480
Just forget it.
259
00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:07,640
Come on, let's go out to dinner.
260
00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:08,297
I'm buying.
261
00:11:08,297 --> 00:11:10,161
Well, what is it he doesn't like about me?
262
00:11:10,161 --> 00:11:12,481
My voice, my manner, do I intimidate him?
263
00:11:12,481 --> 00:11:13,232
I don't know!
264
00:11:13,232 --> 00:11:14,239
What is it about you?
265
00:11:14,239 --> 00:11:15,769
Everybody has to love you!
266
00:11:15,769 --> 00:11:17,559
Just like when you were in
that play in high school.
267
00:11:17,559 --> 00:11:19,265
You get standing ovations every night,
268
00:11:19,265 --> 00:11:20,831
all your friends say you're great,
269
00:11:20,831 --> 00:11:23,040
you got one lousy review in the school paper
270
00:11:23,040 --> 00:11:24,641
and you sulked for a week.
271
00:11:24,641 --> 00:11:26,650
Well, you know, Dad, I'd like to
think I've matured a bit since then.
272
00:11:26,650 --> 00:11:27,809
But, you know, you would have sulked too,
273
00:11:27,809 --> 00:11:28,696
if you'd read in the paper,
274
00:11:28,696 --> 00:11:31,354
"Mr. Crane's attempts to gyrate
his hips as Conrad,
275
00:11:31,354 --> 00:11:33,848
the teen idol in 'Bye-Bye, Birdie,'
made this reviewer say,
276
00:11:33,848 --> 00:11:40,758
'Bye-bye, breakfast!'"
277
00:11:40,758 --> 00:11:49,735
That review was a mash note
compared to my first draft.
278
00:11:49,735 --> 00:11:51,912
I know just what you're going through.
279
00:11:51,912 --> 00:11:54,391
I once won a dance competition hands down,
280
00:11:54,391 --> 00:11:57,146
but instead of celebrating I spent the whole night
281
00:11:57,146 --> 00:11:59,712
fretting over my one bad score.
282
00:11:59,712 --> 00:12:01,017
Silly-head!
283
00:12:01,017 --> 00:12:04,866
Idiot.
284
00:12:04,866 --> 00:12:08,695
Oh, I've stepped in it now!
285
00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:10,033
Listen here, Dr. Crane?
286
00:12:10,033 --> 00:12:11,297
Yeah, Daphne?
287
00:12:11,297 --> 00:12:14,296
All right now, Daphne, just a moment!
288
00:12:14,296 --> 00:12:16,402
Just try to remember what you're
like when you're arguing with Joe.
289
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:17,285
Consider Niles's situation.
290
00:12:17,285 --> 00:12:18,381
He's separated.
291
00:12:18,381 --> 00:12:20,662
You can't imagine the emotional see-saw he's on.
292
00:12:20,662 --> 00:12:22,374
Not to mention the fact that he may be unaware that
293
00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:25,735
he's acting like a complete jackass!
294
00:12:25,735 --> 00:12:27,321
Of course, you're right.
295
00:12:27,321 --> 00:12:29,591
I'm sorry, I should be more sensitive.
296
00:12:29,591 --> 00:12:41,628
From now on, nothing you say
can make me cross with you.
297
00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:44,158
I suppose I had that coming.
298
00:12:44,158 --> 00:12:46,710
Though I think "jackass" was a tad over the line.
299
00:12:46,710 --> 00:12:51,501
Well, just consider it payback for
the headline, "Crane's 'Birdie' Lays An Egg!"
300
00:12:51,501 --> 00:12:53,205
All right, now, Fras, you got to let it go.
301
00:12:53,205 --> 00:12:54,504
You know, no matter who you are,
302
00:12:54,504 --> 00:12:57,893
no matter what you do, you can't please everyone.
303
00:12:57,893 --> 00:13:02,245
I suppose my negative baggage is
just a pound or two over the weight limit.
304
00:13:02,245 --> 00:13:05,193
O.K., good, come on, let's go have dinner.
305
00:13:05,193 --> 00:13:06,296
This is good!
306
00:13:06,296 --> 00:13:07,062
This is healthy!
307
00:13:07,062 --> 00:13:10,977
I'm letting go!
308
00:13:17,095 --> 00:13:21,102
There he is.
309
00:13:21,102 --> 00:13:24,478
The man who... doesn't like me.
310
00:13:24,478 --> 00:13:28,241
I knew we should have taken two cars.
311
00:13:34,324 --> 00:13:36,829
What the hell is the matter with you?
312
00:13:36,829 --> 00:13:37,478
I'm sorry, Dad.
313
00:13:37,478 --> 00:13:39,768
It's just that "I just don't like him,"
314
00:13:39,768 --> 00:13:42,763
it's not specific enough.
315
00:13:42,763 --> 00:13:43,852
Why doesn't he like me?
316
00:13:43,852 --> 00:13:45,390
What difference does it make?
317
00:13:45,390 --> 00:13:47,526
Well, if his point was valid,
I would do something about it.
318
00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:49,878
If it's not, well, then I could dismiss it.
319
00:13:49,878 --> 00:13:51,171
Fine, go talk to him.
320
00:13:51,171 --> 00:13:51,974
I can't.
321
00:13:51,974 --> 00:13:55,310
He's not supposed to know I was
part of the focus group.
322
00:13:55,310 --> 00:13:58,454
You, Dad! You could go talk to him for me.
323
00:13:58,454 --> 00:14:00,222
Oh, for crying out loud?
324
00:14:00,222 --> 00:14:04,132
Look, if we're going to be here for
a while, could we at least lock the doors?
325
00:14:04,132 --> 00:14:06,413
Relax, Niles, the neighborhood's O.K.
326
00:14:06,413 --> 00:14:08,414
The docks are two blocks from here!
327
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:09,438
So's the Ritz-Carleton.
328
00:14:09,438 --> 00:14:14,084
Exactly! We're caught halfway between heaven and hell.
329
00:14:14,084 --> 00:14:15,821
All I want is more information.
330
00:14:15,821 --> 00:14:18,334
Dad, please? Please go talk to him for me?
331
00:14:18,334 --> 00:14:20,766
All right, if I get an answer
for you, can we go to dinner?
332
00:14:20,766 --> 00:14:21,841
O.K., fine.
333
00:14:21,841 --> 00:14:23,464
Oh, but wait, wait, wait!
334
00:14:23,464 --> 00:14:25,173
Now you can't just walk up there and ask him.
335
00:14:25,173 --> 00:14:27,024
He'll know that I sent you.
336
00:14:27,024 --> 00:14:30,385
Got to find some artful way of
introducing the subject.
337
00:14:30,385 --> 00:14:33,432
Can we at least hide Dad's handicapped sign?
338
00:14:33,432 --> 00:14:36,115
It sends a clear signal that we're
incapable of fighting back!
339
00:14:36,115 --> 00:14:39,149
So do your suspenders.
340
00:14:39,149 --> 00:14:40,190
All right, I've got it, I've got it.
341
00:14:40,190 --> 00:14:42,078
You're a business man in town from Chicago.
342
00:14:42,078 --> 00:14:43,235
No, no, it's too obvious.
343
00:14:43,235 --> 00:14:44,843
Uh, from Cleveland.
344
00:14:44,843 --> 00:14:46,332
No would ever pretend to be from Cleveland.
345
00:14:46,332 --> 00:14:47,524
Fine, then we eat.
346
00:14:47,524 --> 00:14:49,349
Wait, wait, we're not through yet!
347
00:14:49,349 --> 00:14:52,004
Yes, you've had a bad sales month,
and you're a little depressed.
348
00:14:52,004 --> 00:14:54,347
You happen to see an add for my
show on the side of a bus,
349
00:14:54,347 --> 00:14:57,133
and you were wondering if I'm
as intelligent as I look.
350
00:14:57,133 --> 00:14:57,746
What?
351
00:14:57,746 --> 00:14:59,341
Oh, just word it your own way.
352
00:14:59,341 --> 00:15:01,428
Are we clear on this now?
353
00:15:01,428 --> 00:15:02,274
All right, I got it.
354
00:15:02,274 --> 00:15:06,179
Businessman, Cleveland, depressed, then eat!
355
00:15:06,179 --> 00:15:08,044
Yes, Dad, eat!
356
00:15:08,044 --> 00:15:12,678
Honestly, sometimes you can get
so obsessed about things!
357
00:15:12,678 --> 00:15:17,106
Oh, God, it's raining!
358
00:15:20,301 --> 00:15:21,155
Hi, I'm Marty Crane.
359
00:15:21,155 --> 00:15:22,732
My son's Dr. Frasier Crane.
360
00:15:22,732 --> 00:15:24,586
He's across the street in that BMW.
361
00:15:24,586 --> 00:15:26,876
No, don't look!
362
00:15:26,876 --> 00:15:28,094
Oh, my God.
363
00:15:28,094 --> 00:15:29,565
He was behind the mirror.
364
00:15:29,565 --> 00:15:30,451
Look, don't worry about it.
365
00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:31,492
He's not mad at you.
366
00:15:31,492 --> 00:15:33,426
He just want to know why you don't like him.
367
00:15:33,426 --> 00:15:35,335
But I do like him.
368
00:15:35,335 --> 00:15:35,873
No, you don't.
369
00:15:35,873 --> 00:15:37,489
Oh, yes, I do!
370
00:15:37,489 --> 00:15:39,206
No, he heard what you said.
371
00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:40,493
They lied to me.
372
00:15:40,493 --> 00:15:46,305
They lied about.. They lied about the
mirror, they lied about the free gift.
373
00:15:46,305 --> 00:15:51,430
If that's a tod back, what the hell is
funny pack
374
00:15:51,430 --> 00:15:56,504
Look, I just need you to be more specific
What don't you like him about.
375
00:15:56,504 --> 00:15:57,476
I can't do this.
376
00:15:57,476 --> 00:16:01,171
I don't like to say bad things
about people, and you are his father?
377
00:16:01,171 --> 00:16:02,422
No, you'd be doing me a favor!
378
00:16:02,422 --> 00:16:04,110
Just answer this one question,
379
00:16:04,110 --> 00:16:06,655
and we'll all get out of your life forever.
380
00:16:06,655 --> 00:16:07,714
you're promising?
381
00:16:07,714 --> 00:16:10,017
Absolutely.
382
00:16:10,017 --> 00:16:11,869
All right.
383
00:16:11,869 --> 00:16:13,986
I-I don't know your son well.
384
00:16:13,986 --> 00:16:21,357
But, uh, I guess I find him, uh,
just a little bit... annoying.
385
00:16:21,357 --> 00:16:22,279
Yeah?
386
00:16:22,279 --> 00:16:24,106
Annoying.
387
00:16:24,106 --> 00:16:25,216
O.K. You did good.
388
00:16:25,216 --> 00:16:26,361
Thanks.
389
00:16:26,361 --> 00:16:29,796
Please tell your son I'm sorry
that he annoys me so much.
390
00:16:29,796 --> 00:16:33,469
Will do.
391
00:16:33,469 --> 00:16:36,007
Not yet... not yet... not yet.
392
00:16:36,007 --> 00:16:43,336
OK, unlock!
393
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:46,334
And lock!
394
00:16:46,334 --> 00:16:47,304
Mission accomplished.
395
00:16:47,304 --> 00:16:47,910
Good.
396
00:16:47,910 --> 00:16:48,632
Did he believe my story?
397
00:16:48,632 --> 00:16:50,271
Oh, yeah, I had him going pretty good.
398
00:16:50,271 --> 00:16:53,042
That Cleveland thing really sold it.
399
00:16:53,042 --> 00:16:54,511
Well, we better go eat now, huh?
400
00:16:54,511 --> 00:16:55,351
Before he sees us again.
401
00:16:55,351 --> 00:16:57,009
Right.
402
00:16:57,009 --> 00:16:59,344
So, uh, Dad, what doesn't he like about me?
403
00:16:59,344 --> 00:17:01,408
He said you annoy him.
404
00:17:01,408 --> 00:17:03,528
Yes, how so?
405
00:17:03,528 --> 00:17:04,696
Well, I didn't ask him.
406
00:17:04,696 --> 00:17:06,601
What do you mean you didn't ask him?
407
00:17:06,601 --> 00:17:07,608
Oh, geez!
408
00:17:07,608 --> 00:17:10,117
I'm sorry, Dad, but I have no idea
what "he's annoying" means!
409
00:17:10,117 --> 00:17:13,997
Well, it's clear enough to me!
410
00:17:13,997 --> 00:17:19,754
Frasier, not to appear unsympathetic but
I had my i'm dangerous space on so long
it's starting to hurt.
411
00:17:19,754 --> 00:17:21,975
oh, what is about me he couldn't find
so annoying.
412
00:17:21,975 --> 00:17:27,117
well, he mentioned something about
not letting old man to eat!
413
00:17:27,117 --> 00:17:30,775
I'm just going to have to do this myself!
414
00:17:30,775 --> 00:17:31,254
Here.
415
00:17:31,254 --> 00:17:33,929
Thank you.
416
00:17:33,929 --> 00:17:34,749
Who're you calling?
417
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:35,584
No one.
418
00:17:35,584 --> 00:17:37,976
I just pressed 911, and I'm keeping
my finger poised
419
00:17:37,976 --> 00:17:40,418
over the Send button in case there's
trouble with those hooligans.
420
00:17:40,418 --> 00:17:44,147
Oh, the UPS men or the little girls
playing in the puddle?
421
00:17:46,942 --> 00:17:47,493
Hello.
422
00:17:47,493 --> 00:17:49,390
Hello.
423
00:17:49,390 --> 00:17:50,463
I can help you?
424
00:17:50,463 --> 00:17:57,029
Uh, yes, yes, you were recently
speaking with a salesman from Cleveland.
425
00:17:57,029 --> 00:17:58,440
I don't think so.
426
00:17:58,440 --> 00:17:59,958
It was just five minutes ago.
427
00:17:59,958 --> 00:18:03,031
He left you and went over to that
car waiting right over there.
428
00:18:03,031 --> 00:18:05,557
You see?
429
00:18:05,557 --> 00:18:06,373
Oh, God, no.
430
00:18:06,373 --> 00:18:07,704
You're him, it's you.
431
00:18:07,704 --> 00:18:08,565
Yes, yes, it is.
432
00:18:08,565 --> 00:18:10,382
I'm so sorry, I really don't mean to bother you
433
00:18:10,382 --> 00:18:13,100
but I would like to talk to you for a minute.
434
00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:14,232
I like your show.
435
00:18:14,232 --> 00:18:15,078
Oh, no.
436
00:18:15,078 --> 00:18:18,991
I like your show, and I like you.
437
00:18:18,991 --> 00:18:19,772
That man was my father
438
00:18:19,772 --> 00:18:21,862
I like your father!
439
00:18:21,862 --> 00:18:23,271
Oh, that's very nice of you,
but you see, you told him that,
440
00:18:23,271 --> 00:18:25,115
uh, you find me annoying.
441
00:18:25,115 --> 00:18:26,861
Yes, yes, you did, and that's all right.
442
00:18:26,861 --> 00:18:28,460
I don't mind constructive criticism.
443
00:18:28,460 --> 00:18:30,495
It's just that I wish you could
be a bit more specific.
444
00:18:30,495 --> 00:18:32,879
What exactly is it about me that
you find so annoying?
445
00:18:32,879 --> 00:18:33,718
You're not annoying.
446
00:18:33,718 --> 00:18:35,757
Yes, I am!
447
00:18:35,757 --> 00:18:36,902
Would I be here if I wasn't?
448
00:18:36,902 --> 00:18:38,810
Well, I have enjoyed talking to you very much,
449
00:18:38,810 --> 00:18:40,335
but it's time for my break.
450
00:18:40,335 --> 00:18:44,597
Oh, no, no, please!
451
00:18:44,597 --> 00:18:46,891
I'm so sorry.
452
00:18:46,891 --> 00:18:48,767
I am a sticky mess.
453
00:18:48,767 --> 00:18:50,151
Let me help you with that.
454
00:18:50,151 --> 00:18:52,966
No, no, no, no, it's fine, good.
455
00:18:52,966 --> 00:18:54,117
Manu?
456
00:18:54,117 --> 00:18:57,915
Drive safe.
457
00:18:57,915 --> 00:18:59,068
Oh, dear God!
458
00:18:59,068 --> 00:19:00,174
I'm so sorry!
459
00:19:00,174 --> 00:19:01,804
Are you all right?
460
00:19:01,804 --> 00:19:03,675
Let me look at it, let me look at it?
461
00:19:03,675 --> 00:19:04,365
No, no!
462
00:19:04,365 --> 00:19:04,934
Look, I am a doctor.
463
00:19:04,934 --> 00:19:06,628
No, no, I just go to the restaurant to put ice on it.
464
00:19:06,628 --> 00:19:10,207
Right, you know, I'll hold down the fort here!
465
00:19:10,207 --> 00:19:13,771
Glad to be of help!
466
00:19:13,771 --> 00:19:15,909
He's crushed the gentleman's hand, and now
467
00:19:15,909 --> 00:19:19,604
he appears to be commandeering his newsstand.
468
00:19:19,604 --> 00:19:23,860
Uh-huh.
469
00:19:23,860 --> 00:19:24,773
Oh, good lord.
470
00:19:24,773 --> 00:19:29,010
Smoking in the worst places!
471
00:19:29,010 --> 00:19:29,820
How much for the paper?
472
00:19:29,820 --> 00:19:32,812
Ah, yes, uh, well, that would be
473
00:19:32,812 --> 00:19:35,614
oh, fifty cents.
474
00:19:35,614 --> 00:19:37,086
Thank you so much. There we are.
475
00:19:37,086 --> 00:19:40,260
Scuse me, are you Dr. Crane from the radio?
476
00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:41,371
Why, yes, I am.
477
00:19:41,371 --> 00:19:43,555
Oh, I just never miss your show!
478
00:19:43,555 --> 00:19:44,485
I love you!
479
00:19:44,485 --> 00:19:46,099
I guess you get tired of hearing that.
480
00:19:46,099 --> 00:19:50,022
Oh, occupational hazard.
481
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:51,077
Oh, would you mind?
482
00:19:51,077 --> 00:19:53,260
Oh, I wouldn't mind at all.
483
00:19:53,260 --> 00:19:54,013
To Amanda.
484
00:19:54,013 --> 00:19:57,269
Amanda, it's a pleasure.
485
00:19:57,269 --> 00:19:59,356
What are you doing here, anyway?
486
00:19:59,356 --> 00:20:02,871
Oh, oh, well you see, let me explain, you see.
487
00:20:02,871 --> 00:20:08,106
The, uh, radio station conducted
a little audio survey today,
488
00:20:08,106 --> 00:20:10,732
and although the response was favorable
489
00:20:10,732 --> 00:20:12,659
from eleven out of twelve of the participants?
490
00:20:12,659 --> 00:20:13,417
Is that smoking?
491
00:20:13,417 --> 00:20:15,524
Well, some people might consider it smoking,
492
00:20:15,524 --> 00:20:16,755
but you see, for me?
493
00:20:16,755 --> 00:20:18,265
FIRE!
494
00:20:18,265 --> 00:20:20,934
Oh, my God!
495
00:20:28,707 --> 00:20:33,101
oh my god
Frasier set his newsstand on fire.
496
00:20:33,101 --> 00:20:37,928
Mmm-hmm.
497
00:20:54,396 --> 00:21:02,131
Uh, may I?
498
00:21:02,131 --> 00:21:03,700
Look, I know there's nothing
499
00:21:03,700 --> 00:21:05,541
I can say right now that would
make you feel any better,
500
00:21:05,541 --> 00:21:12,601
but rest assured, I will be financially
responsible for everything.
501
00:21:12,601 --> 00:21:18,033
All this because you had to know
why I do not like you.
502
00:21:18,033 --> 00:21:20,902
Well, you were kind of vague.
503
00:21:20,902 --> 00:21:22,490
You want to know why?
504
00:21:22,490 --> 00:21:24,074
I'll tell you why.
505
00:21:24,074 --> 00:21:28,404
I think you are a smarty-pants.
506
00:21:28,404 --> 00:21:30,435
I was too polite to say that before.
507
00:21:30,435 --> 00:21:35,508
But then you spied on me, you stalked
me, you badgered me, you poured
508
00:21:35,508 --> 00:21:39,178
Yoo-Hoo down my Dockers, you
crunched my hand, and then, as
509
00:21:39,178 --> 00:21:43,370
if all that was not enough, you
burned down my newsstand,
510
00:21:43,370 --> 00:21:51,050
my livelihood, a gift to me from my
beloved uncle, may he rest in peace!
511
00:21:51,050 --> 00:22:03,930
Was that so hard?
512
00:22:03,930 --> 00:22:06,192
Special Guest Star TONY SHALHOUB as Manu
37244
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
