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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,140 --> 00:00:06,175 (gentle melody plays) 2 00:00:27,769 --> 00:00:32,769 Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull 3 00:00:33,404 --> 00:00:35,638 ♪ ♪ 4 00:00:37,006 --> 00:00:39,442 EVAN: Dear Evan Hansen... 5 00:00:51,087 --> 00:00:54,391 ...today is going to be an amazing day, 6 00:00:54,490 --> 00:00:56,526 and here's why. 7 00:00:59,529 --> 00:01:04,067 Because today, all you have to do is just be yourself. 8 00:01:05,702 --> 00:01:08,471 But also confident. That's-that's important. 9 00:01:08,571 --> 00:01:10,273 And interesting. Easy to talk to. 10 00:01:10,374 --> 00:01:12,108 Approachable. But mostly just be yourself. 11 00:01:12,208 --> 00:01:13,843 You know, that's number one, obviously. Be yourself. 12 00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:15,778 But, like, a confident version of yourself, 13 00:01:15,878 --> 00:01:18,014 like, approachable and interesting 14 00:01:18,114 --> 00:01:19,716 and not weird or anxious or depressed. 15 00:01:19,816 --> 00:01:21,284 But you're not weird or anxious or depressed. 16 00:01:21,385 --> 00:01:22,986 I don't even know why you're bringing it up. 17 00:01:23,086 --> 00:01:24,321 You can't be scared to talk to other people. 18 00:01:24,421 --> 00:01:25,788 You said that you'd be better. 19 00:01:25,888 --> 00:01:26,756 You said this year would be different. 20 00:01:26,856 --> 00:01:27,890 You're overthinking it. 21 00:01:27,991 --> 00:01:29,360 Do you like having no friends? 22 00:01:29,460 --> 00:01:30,994 All you have to do is just be yourself. 23 00:01:31,094 --> 00:01:33,896 ♪ I've learned to slam on the brake ♪ 24 00:01:33,997 --> 00:01:37,600 ♪ Before I even turn the key ♪ 25 00:01:37,700 --> 00:01:40,670 ♪ Before I make the mistake ♪ 26 00:01:40,770 --> 00:01:43,973 ♪ Before I lead with the worst of me ♪ 27 00:01:44,073 --> 00:01:47,176 ♪ Give them no reason to stare ♪ 28 00:01:47,276 --> 00:01:50,780 ♪ No slipping up if you slip away ♪ 29 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:54,050 ♪ So I got nothing to share ♪ 30 00:01:54,150 --> 00:01:57,220 ♪ No, I got nothing to say ♪ 31 00:01:57,321 --> 00:01:59,622 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun ♪ 32 00:01:59,722 --> 00:02:02,658 ♪ If you keep getting burned ♪ 33 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:08,698 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun because you've learned ♪ 34 00:02:08,798 --> 00:02:12,602 ♪ Because you've learned ♪ 35 00:02:12,702 --> 00:02:15,104 ♪ On the outside always looking in ♪ 36 00:02:15,204 --> 00:02:18,308 ♪ Will I ever be more than I've always been? ♪ 37 00:02:18,409 --> 00:02:22,011 ♪ 'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass ♪ 38 00:02:22,111 --> 00:02:24,781 ♪ I'm waving through a window ♪ 39 00:02:24,881 --> 00:02:28,051 ♪ Oh, I try to speak, but nobody can hear ♪ 40 00:02:28,151 --> 00:02:32,288 ♪ So I wait around for an answer to appear ♪ 41 00:02:32,389 --> 00:02:35,426 ♪ While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass ♪ 42 00:02:35,526 --> 00:02:38,194 ♪ I'm waving through a window ♪ 43 00:02:38,294 --> 00:02:39,862 ♪ Oh ♪ 44 00:02:40,663 --> 00:02:42,865 ♪ Can anybody see? ♪ 45 00:02:42,965 --> 00:02:47,703 ♪ Is anybody waving back at me? ♪ 46 00:02:47,804 --> 00:02:50,340 ♪ ♪ 47 00:02:56,179 --> 00:02:57,914 (sighs) 48 00:02:58,014 --> 00:02:59,715 So you just didn't eat last night? 49 00:02:59,816 --> 00:03:01,584 I wasn't hungry. 50 00:03:01,684 --> 00:03:03,119 You're a senior in high school. 51 00:03:03,219 --> 00:03:04,754 You need to be able to order dinner for yourself. 52 00:03:04,854 --> 00:03:06,022 You can do it all online. 53 00:03:06,122 --> 00:03:07,890 You don't have to talk to anybody. 54 00:03:07,990 --> 00:03:09,560 Okay, well, that's not, that's not true, actually, though, 55 00:03:09,692 --> 00:03:11,328 because, um, the credit card's expired, so you have to meet 56 00:03:11,428 --> 00:03:13,296 the delivery person at the door, you know? 57 00:03:13,397 --> 00:03:14,697 You have to pay them with cash at the door. 58 00:03:14,797 --> 00:03:16,032 You have to greet them. 59 00:03:16,132 --> 00:03:17,534 You know, you have to figure out the right, 60 00:03:17,633 --> 00:03:19,602 the right, um... the-the proper greeting. 61 00:03:19,702 --> 00:03:20,937 Okay. 62 00:03:22,038 --> 00:03:24,140 This is what you're supposed to be working on, sweetheart, 63 00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:25,476 with Dr. Sherman. 64 00:03:25,576 --> 00:03:27,877 Have you been doing those letters he wants you to do? 65 00:03:27,977 --> 00:03:29,313 "Dear Evan Hansen." 66 00:03:29,413 --> 00:03:32,715 I mean, I've definitely... I-I've been trying to. 67 00:03:32,815 --> 00:03:33,850 Those letters are important, honey. 68 00:03:33,950 --> 00:03:35,352 You have to keep working. 69 00:03:35,452 --> 00:03:38,054 We can't go back to where you were last year, right? 70 00:03:38,154 --> 00:03:39,889 Um, you have an appointment this afternoon. 71 00:03:39,989 --> 00:03:41,325 I'm working till 6:00, 72 00:03:41,425 --> 00:03:44,060 so you're gonna have to take the bus. 73 00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:45,496 Hey. 74 00:03:45,596 --> 00:03:46,929 I thought you could go around 75 00:03:47,029 --> 00:03:49,566 and ask all the other kids to sign your cast. 76 00:03:49,665 --> 00:03:51,167 Perfect icebreaker, right? 77 00:03:53,002 --> 00:03:55,705 - What happened to your shirt? - There was a stain on it. 78 00:03:55,805 --> 00:03:57,707 - Wha... But it's brand-new. - Yes, I know. 79 00:03:57,807 --> 00:03:59,842 I was... I'm so mad. 80 00:03:59,942 --> 00:04:02,446 ♪ We start with stars in our eyes ♪ 81 00:04:03,413 --> 00:04:06,682 ♪ We start believing that we belong ♪ 82 00:04:06,782 --> 00:04:09,886 ♪ But every sun doesn't rise ♪ 83 00:04:09,986 --> 00:04:13,222 ♪ And no one tells you where you went wrong ♪ 84 00:04:13,323 --> 00:04:15,858 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun ♪ 85 00:04:15,958 --> 00:04:18,194 ♪ If you keep getting burned ♪ 86 00:04:19,762 --> 00:04:23,933 ♪ Step out, step out of the sun because you've learned ♪ 87 00:04:24,033 --> 00:04:26,235 ♪ Because you've learned ♪ 88 00:04:26,336 --> 00:04:29,105 ♪ On the outside always looking in ♪ 89 00:04:29,205 --> 00:04:31,941 ♪ Will I ever be more than I've always been? ♪ 90 00:04:32,041 --> 00:04:36,078 ♪ 'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass ♪ 91 00:04:36,179 --> 00:04:38,315 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 92 00:04:38,415 --> 00:04:42,185 ♪ Oh, I try to speak, but nobody can hear ♪ 93 00:04:42,285 --> 00:04:45,288 ♪ So I wait around for an answer to appear ♪ 94 00:04:45,389 --> 00:04:49,192 ♪ While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass ♪ 95 00:04:49,292 --> 00:04:51,628 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 96 00:04:51,727 --> 00:04:53,262 ♪ Oh ♪ 97 00:04:54,063 --> 00:04:56,400 ♪ Can anybody see? ♪ 98 00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:58,801 ♪ Is anybody waving? ♪ 99 00:04:58,901 --> 00:05:00,102 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 100 00:05:00,203 --> 00:05:02,171 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 101 00:05:02,271 --> 00:05:05,241 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 102 00:05:05,342 --> 00:05:06,876 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 103 00:05:06,976 --> 00:05:08,579 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 104 00:05:08,679 --> 00:05:11,948 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 105 00:05:12,048 --> 00:05:13,650 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 106 00:05:13,749 --> 00:05:15,284 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 107 00:05:15,385 --> 00:05:18,154 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 108 00:05:18,254 --> 00:05:20,189 ♪ When you're falling in a forest ♪ 109 00:05:20,289 --> 00:05:22,024 ♪ And there's nobody around ♪ 110 00:05:22,124 --> 00:05:25,329 ♪ Do you ever really crash or even make a sound? ♪ 111 00:05:25,429 --> 00:05:28,332 ♪ Did I even make a sound? Did I even make a sound? ♪ 112 00:05:28,432 --> 00:05:29,899 ♪ It's like I never made a sound ♪ 113 00:05:29,999 --> 00:05:33,035 ♪ Will I ever make a sound? ♪ 114 00:05:33,135 --> 00:05:35,572 ♪ On the outside always looking in ♪ 115 00:05:35,672 --> 00:05:38,975 ♪ Will I ever be more than I've always been? ♪ 116 00:05:39,075 --> 00:05:42,646 ♪ 'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass ♪ 117 00:05:42,745 --> 00:05:44,514 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 118 00:05:44,615 --> 00:05:48,452 ♪ Oh, I try to speak, but nobody can hear ♪ 119 00:05:48,552 --> 00:05:51,954 ♪ So I wait around for an answer to appear ♪ 120 00:05:52,054 --> 00:05:55,992 ♪ While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass ♪ 121 00:05:56,092 --> 00:05:58,395 ♪ Waving through a window ♪ 122 00:05:58,495 --> 00:05:59,996 ♪ Oh ♪ 123 00:06:00,863 --> 00:06:03,099 ♪ Can anybody see? ♪ 124 00:06:03,199 --> 00:06:08,771 ♪ Is anybody waving back at me? ♪ 125 00:06:08,871 --> 00:06:12,108 ♪ Is anybody waving? ♪ 126 00:06:12,208 --> 00:06:15,646 ♪ Waving, waving ♪ 127 00:06:15,746 --> 00:06:17,913 ♪ Whoa... ♪ 128 00:06:18,014 --> 00:06:23,687 ♪ Whoa. ♪ 129 00:06:23,786 --> 00:06:25,355 - (song ends) - ♪ Let's go, Bobcats, let's go... ♪ 130 00:06:25,455 --> 00:06:27,557 - (marching band playing) - (students chattering) 131 00:06:27,658 --> 00:06:28,958 JARED: Evan. 132 00:06:30,394 --> 00:06:31,495 What? 133 00:06:31,595 --> 00:06:32,862 It's Zoe Murphy 134 00:06:32,962 --> 00:06:35,432 in that hot band shirt you love so much. 135 00:06:35,532 --> 00:06:36,999 Can you just... Can you please stop? 136 00:06:37,099 --> 00:06:38,568 Well, hey, maybe she's into you, too. 137 00:06:38,669 --> 00:06:40,169 Maybe you should talk to her, tell her how you feel. 138 00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:42,238 I've tried talking to her. 139 00:06:42,339 --> 00:06:43,607 Really? 140 00:06:43,707 --> 00:06:45,875 Yes. Yeah, I... 141 00:06:45,975 --> 00:06:47,377 I stayed afterwards, um, last year 142 00:06:47,477 --> 00:06:49,211 after the spring jazz band concert, 143 00:06:49,313 --> 00:06:50,714 but, um, I didn't go up to her 144 00:06:50,813 --> 00:06:52,716 because I was worried that my hands were sweaty. 145 00:06:52,815 --> 00:06:54,384 Which they weren't even, they weren't even that sweaty. 146 00:06:54,484 --> 00:06:55,985 I just... I was worried that they were sweaty, 147 00:06:56,085 --> 00:06:57,487 and sometimes worrying that they're sweaty 148 00:06:57,587 --> 00:06:59,188 makes them sweaty, so I just went to the bathroom 149 00:06:59,288 --> 00:07:00,757 and I put 'em under, like, the hand dryer thing, 150 00:07:00,856 --> 00:07:02,224 but then they were still sweaty. 151 00:07:02,326 --> 00:07:04,894 They were just, um... They were just also warm. 152 00:07:06,396 --> 00:07:08,030 I was kidding. 153 00:07:08,130 --> 00:07:09,666 You obviously should not talk to her. 154 00:07:09,766 --> 00:07:11,267 You are a literal disaster. 155 00:07:12,636 --> 00:07:15,905 - (marching band song ends) - (students cheering) 156 00:07:19,041 --> 00:07:20,976 Go, Bobcats! 157 00:07:21,077 --> 00:07:23,347 (cheering) 158 00:07:26,650 --> 00:07:28,552 Go, Bobcats. 159 00:07:28,652 --> 00:07:29,619 So awesome. 160 00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:31,421 So awesome, everyone. 161 00:07:31,521 --> 00:07:32,723 Phenomenal, really. 162 00:07:32,823 --> 00:07:35,291 You know what's not phenomenal? 163 00:07:35,392 --> 00:07:36,426 Deforestation. 164 00:07:36,526 --> 00:07:38,861 So, what happened to your arm exactly? 165 00:07:38,961 --> 00:07:41,598 Um, I was climbing a tree, and I fell. 166 00:07:41,698 --> 00:07:43,032 It was stupid. 167 00:07:43,132 --> 00:07:45,301 You fell out of a tree? What are you, five? 168 00:07:45,402 --> 00:07:47,036 Well, um... 169 00:07:47,136 --> 00:07:48,739 So, actually, I-I worked this summer 170 00:07:48,839 --> 00:07:51,874 as an apprentice park ranger at Ellison State Park. 171 00:07:51,974 --> 00:07:53,844 (Jared sighs) 172 00:07:53,943 --> 00:07:56,078 It's a funny story, though, because... 173 00:07:56,178 --> 00:07:58,013 there was, like, this solid ten minutes after I fell 174 00:07:58,114 --> 00:07:59,616 where I just lay there on the ground, 175 00:07:59,716 --> 00:08:02,051 um, waiting for someone to come get me, you know? 176 00:08:02,151 --> 00:08:03,620 I was like, "Any second now." You know? 177 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:05,154 I just kept... I, like... I was saying to myself, 178 00:08:05,254 --> 00:08:06,889 "Any second now. Here they come." So... 179 00:08:06,989 --> 00:08:08,325 Did they? 180 00:08:08,425 --> 00:08:09,359 No, nobody came. 181 00:08:09,459 --> 00:08:12,396 That's the, um... That's what's funny. 182 00:08:12,496 --> 00:08:13,663 That's not funny. 183 00:08:13,764 --> 00:08:15,064 Model U.N.... 184 00:08:15,164 --> 00:08:17,601 Well, anyways, um, how was... Did you, um... 185 00:08:17,701 --> 00:08:18,968 How was camp? 186 00:08:19,068 --> 00:08:22,539 Well, I put on 13 pounds of pure muscle. 187 00:08:22,639 --> 00:08:25,375 Also, I hooked up with this Brazilian dude 188 00:08:25,475 --> 00:08:28,545 who is literally a supermodel. 189 00:08:29,546 --> 00:08:31,515 So, yeah, hope that answers your question. 190 00:08:31,615 --> 00:08:35,852 So let's have Mother Nature's back so that she'll have ours. 191 00:08:35,951 --> 00:08:38,254 (students cheering) 192 00:08:43,894 --> 00:08:45,629 Yeah! Yeah! 193 00:08:45,729 --> 00:08:48,130 All right, thank you, Alana. Very inspirational. 194 00:08:48,230 --> 00:08:49,999 All right, so let's have a great year, 195 00:08:50,099 --> 00:08:52,234 and, uh, go, Bobcats! 196 00:08:52,335 --> 00:08:54,970 - (students cheering) - (marching band playing) 197 00:09:01,977 --> 00:09:04,915 Hey, um... 198 00:09:05,014 --> 00:09:06,349 would you want to sign my cast? 199 00:09:06,450 --> 00:09:08,083 Uh, you could, you could be the first. 200 00:09:08,184 --> 00:09:10,019 Why would I do that? 201 00:09:10,821 --> 00:09:13,989 Well, I just... I thought, um, because we're friends and... 202 00:09:14,089 --> 00:09:15,559 We're family friends, Evan. 203 00:09:15,659 --> 00:09:17,092 That's an entirely different thing. 204 00:09:17,193 --> 00:09:18,728 Please respect that. 205 00:09:20,262 --> 00:09:22,599 (marching band song ends) 206 00:09:22,699 --> 00:09:24,734 (students chattering) 207 00:09:27,236 --> 00:09:30,005 (excited chatter, cheering nearby) 208 00:09:30,105 --> 00:09:31,775 Connor, I'm loving this manicure. 209 00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:34,377 - Very school shooter chic. - You're such an idiot. 210 00:09:34,478 --> 00:09:35,812 LEILA: That is so not... 211 00:09:36,913 --> 00:09:39,114 STUDENTS: ♪ Here we go, Bobcats, here we go. ♪ 212 00:09:39,215 --> 00:09:41,283 (students clap) 213 00:09:44,053 --> 00:09:45,856 (chuckles softly) 214 00:09:45,956 --> 00:09:48,023 You think that's funny? 215 00:09:48,123 --> 00:09:50,527 What? No. Not-not at all. 216 00:09:52,329 --> 00:09:54,230 Then stop laughing! 217 00:09:54,331 --> 00:09:56,232 (chatter stops) 218 00:09:56,333 --> 00:09:58,668 (breath trembling) 219 00:10:04,774 --> 00:10:06,343 ZOE: Hey. 220 00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:11,481 I'm sorry about my brother. 221 00:10:11,581 --> 00:10:13,383 He's a psycho. 222 00:10:14,918 --> 00:10:17,019 Evan, right? 223 00:10:17,821 --> 00:10:18,922 (softly): Evan? 224 00:10:19,689 --> 00:10:23,058 That-That's your, that's your name? 225 00:10:23,158 --> 00:10:24,728 Y-Yeah, it is. It is. Sorry. 226 00:10:24,828 --> 00:10:26,763 It's Evan. It's Evan. I'm sorry. 227 00:10:26,863 --> 00:10:28,498 Why are you sorry? 228 00:10:28,598 --> 00:10:31,300 'Cause you s-s... you said Evan, and then I said it, you know? 229 00:10:31,401 --> 00:10:33,503 I just repeated it, which is, um... 230 00:10:33,603 --> 00:10:36,506 That's just really annoying when people do that, so... 231 00:10:38,475 --> 00:10:39,809 I'm Zoe. 232 00:10:47,350 --> 00:10:50,353 Sorry. I should... I think... Sorry. 233 00:10:57,159 --> 00:10:59,362 ♪ ♪ 234 00:11:09,372 --> 00:11:11,007 EVAN: Dear Evan Hansen, 235 00:11:11,106 --> 00:11:14,377 turns out this wasn't an amazing day after all. 236 00:11:15,177 --> 00:11:18,280 This isn't gonna be an amazing week or an amazing year 237 00:11:18,381 --> 00:11:20,784 because why would it be? 238 00:11:24,955 --> 00:11:26,957 Oh, I know. Because there's Zoe. 239 00:11:27,057 --> 00:11:31,595 Who I don't even know and who doesn't know me, but... 240 00:11:33,530 --> 00:11:35,999 Maybe if I did, maybe if I could just talk to her, 241 00:11:36,098 --> 00:11:38,501 maybe things would be better. 242 00:11:40,235 --> 00:11:41,771 Or... 243 00:11:42,872 --> 00:11:45,308 ...maybe nothing would be different at all. 244 00:11:47,276 --> 00:11:49,779 I wish everything was different. 245 00:11:49,879 --> 00:11:51,414 I wish I was different. 246 00:11:51,514 --> 00:11:53,049 I wish I was part of something. 247 00:11:53,148 --> 00:11:57,554 I wish that anything I said mattered to anyone. 248 00:11:58,688 --> 00:12:01,791 But it doesn't, and it never did. 249 00:12:03,593 --> 00:12:05,662 And it never will. 250 00:12:07,764 --> 00:12:13,168 I mean, face it, would anyone even notice if I just... 251 00:12:13,268 --> 00:12:15,338 disappeared tomorrow? 252 00:12:15,438 --> 00:12:19,109 Sincerely, your best and most dearest friend, 253 00:12:19,208 --> 00:12:20,844 Me. 254 00:12:28,084 --> 00:12:29,419 CONNOR: Hey. 255 00:12:29,519 --> 00:12:31,321 What happened to your arm? 256 00:12:34,324 --> 00:12:35,725 Um... 257 00:12:36,860 --> 00:12:38,828 I was climbing a tree, and I fell. 258 00:12:38,928 --> 00:12:40,930 You fell out of a tree? 259 00:12:41,031 --> 00:12:43,133 (laughs) 260 00:12:43,232 --> 00:12:45,702 That's the saddest thing I've ever heard. 261 00:12:47,269 --> 00:12:48,838 I know. 262 00:12:56,278 --> 00:12:59,816 S-Sorry, um, I think I accidentally printed something. 263 00:12:59,916 --> 00:13:01,885 Yeah, we're all waiting. 264 00:13:03,285 --> 00:13:05,388 Um, no one signed your cast. 265 00:13:06,389 --> 00:13:07,824 No, I-I know. 266 00:13:07,924 --> 00:13:09,125 I'll sign it. 267 00:13:09,926 --> 00:13:11,528 Oh, you don't... you really don't have to... 268 00:13:11,628 --> 00:13:12,996 Do you have a Sharpie? 269 00:13:13,096 --> 00:13:15,799 Oh, um, I don't. Shoot. 270 00:13:15,899 --> 00:13:17,634 Oh, here's one. 271 00:13:20,036 --> 00:13:21,571 Nice. 272 00:13:36,086 --> 00:13:38,688 Wow, that's great. 273 00:13:38,788 --> 00:13:41,891 Now we can both pretend we have friends. 274 00:13:47,964 --> 00:13:49,766 Uh, "Dear Evan Hansen." Here you go. 275 00:13:49,866 --> 00:13:51,534 Y-Yeah, that's mine. That's mine. 276 00:13:51,634 --> 00:13:54,003 - I'll... I can take it, sorry. - "Because there's Zoe..." 277 00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:56,439 Is this about my sister? 278 00:13:56,539 --> 00:13:59,274 What? No, no. Who's-who's your sister? 279 00:13:59,375 --> 00:14:02,011 - You wanted me to find this? - What? 280 00:14:02,112 --> 00:14:05,215 You saw I was here, so you started writing this 281 00:14:05,315 --> 00:14:06,583 - and you started talking to me. - No. 282 00:14:06,683 --> 00:14:07,817 No, you started talking to me. 283 00:14:07,917 --> 00:14:09,352 So that I would read some creepy shit 284 00:14:09,452 --> 00:14:11,154 about my sister and freak out, right? 285 00:14:11,253 --> 00:14:13,089 - Why would I do that? - So then you can tell everyone 286 00:14:13,189 --> 00:14:15,257 that I'm crazy. Right? 287 00:14:15,358 --> 00:14:18,328 - Right?! - Gentlemen! - (shushes) 288 00:14:19,496 --> 00:14:21,263 EVAN: No, I really... 289 00:14:21,364 --> 00:14:23,867 Look, I really need that back, so can... 290 00:14:23,967 --> 00:14:26,035 Look, can you please just give it back? 291 00:14:32,575 --> 00:14:34,644 Just-just please don't show it to anyone. 292 00:14:34,744 --> 00:14:35,912 Connor! 293 00:14:38,815 --> 00:14:39,949 (coughs) 294 00:14:40,049 --> 00:14:41,551 (panting) 295 00:14:41,651 --> 00:14:42,852 (coughs) 296 00:14:42,952 --> 00:14:44,854 (panting) 297 00:14:44,954 --> 00:14:47,257 ♪ ♪ 298 00:14:47,357 --> 00:14:49,092 Come on. 299 00:14:49,192 --> 00:14:50,493 (groans) 300 00:14:50,593 --> 00:14:52,929 Shit, shit. 301 00:14:53,029 --> 00:14:54,097 (blows) 302 00:14:54,197 --> 00:14:56,432 (panting) 303 00:14:58,835 --> 00:15:01,805 ♪ ♪ 304 00:15:08,378 --> 00:15:10,613 (panting slows) 305 00:15:22,525 --> 00:15:24,527 ♪ ♪ 306 00:15:28,164 --> 00:15:29,833 (phone vibrates) 307 00:15:29,933 --> 00:15:31,034 Hi. 308 00:15:31,134 --> 00:15:32,836 HEIDI (over speaker): Hi, honey. I'm so sorry. 309 00:15:32,936 --> 00:15:34,470 Erica called in at the last minute with a stomach bug, 310 00:15:34,571 --> 00:15:36,840 and there's only one other nurse on tonight, 311 00:15:36,940 --> 00:15:38,942 so I-I volunteered to take her shift. 312 00:15:39,042 --> 00:15:40,710 I hope you weren't waiting for me to eat. 313 00:15:40,810 --> 00:15:43,446 - No, I already ate. - Um, it's just they, uh, 314 00:15:43,546 --> 00:15:45,215 they announced more budget cuts this morning, 315 00:15:45,316 --> 00:15:46,482 so anything I can do to show 316 00:15:46,583 --> 00:15:47,684 that I'm a team player, you know? 317 00:15:47,784 --> 00:15:49,719 - How was your day? - Fine. 318 00:15:49,819 --> 00:15:51,187 It was, it was pretty good. 319 00:15:51,287 --> 00:15:54,057 Yeah? You know, I-I texted with Meera this morning, 320 00:15:54,157 --> 00:15:55,658 and she said that Jared was 321 00:15:55,758 --> 00:15:57,961 really looking forward to seeing you and reconnecting. 322 00:15:58,061 --> 00:15:59,429 I thought that was nice. 323 00:15:59,529 --> 00:16:01,798 Yeah, he's so nice. 324 00:16:01,898 --> 00:16:03,566 - HEIDI: How was Dr. Sherman? - Pretty good. 325 00:16:03,666 --> 00:16:05,668 Any change to your meds? 326 00:16:07,103 --> 00:16:08,538 EVAN: Um, no. 327 00:16:08,638 --> 00:16:10,974 Oh, God, here he comes. Um, all right, I-I-I... 328 00:16:11,074 --> 00:16:12,343 All right, love you. Bye. 329 00:16:12,442 --> 00:16:14,844 - (line beeps) - Okay, I love you... 330 00:16:14,944 --> 00:16:16,446 too. 331 00:16:19,048 --> 00:16:20,817 JARED: A letter to yourself. I mean, what is that, 332 00:16:20,917 --> 00:16:22,619 like some kind of sex thing? 333 00:16:22,719 --> 00:16:24,254 No. No, it's not a sex thing. 334 00:16:24,355 --> 00:16:25,989 It's... It was an assignment from my therapist. 335 00:16:26,089 --> 00:16:27,891 Ew. Why-why are you telling me this? 336 00:16:27,991 --> 00:16:29,392 Well, I didn't know who else to tell. 337 00:16:29,492 --> 00:16:31,494 You're my only f... family friend. 338 00:16:31,594 --> 00:16:32,862 Oh, that's sad. 339 00:16:32,962 --> 00:16:34,697 Look, Connor isn't here again today. 340 00:16:34,797 --> 00:16:36,333 That's-that's three days in a row. 341 00:16:36,432 --> 00:16:38,434 And h-he hasn't done anything with it yet, you know, 342 00:16:38,534 --> 00:16:39,669 like put it online or whatever, 343 00:16:39,769 --> 00:16:41,271 because I've-I've been checking. 344 00:16:41,372 --> 00:16:44,107 So, you know, maybe he just... maybe he forgot, right? 345 00:16:44,207 --> 00:16:46,009 Right. Right. 346 00:16:46,109 --> 00:16:47,243 Or maybe he didn't, 347 00:16:47,344 --> 00:16:48,912 because he's definitely gonna put it online. 348 00:16:49,012 --> 00:16:50,980 Dude, Connor Murphy is batshit. 349 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:53,082 Don't you remember when he threw a printer at Mrs. G 350 00:16:53,182 --> 00:16:55,718 in the second grade because he couldn't be line leader? 351 00:16:55,818 --> 00:16:57,453 Like, he was seven. 352 00:16:57,553 --> 00:16:59,622 Just imagine what he's capable of now. 353 00:16:59,722 --> 00:17:01,557 WOMAN (over P.A.): Evan Hansen, please report 354 00:17:01,658 --> 00:17:03,026 to Mr. Howard's office. 355 00:17:03,126 --> 00:17:04,961 Oh, damn. 356 00:17:10,334 --> 00:17:12,502 Evan. 357 00:17:15,406 --> 00:17:18,875 Connor Murphy's mother and stepfather are here to see you. 358 00:17:18,975 --> 00:17:20,877 They want to speak in private. 359 00:17:43,266 --> 00:17:45,034 Hi. 360 00:17:46,936 --> 00:17:48,037 Hello. 361 00:17:49,806 --> 00:17:51,574 Why don't you go ahead, honey. 362 00:17:51,674 --> 00:17:53,509 I'm going as fast as I can. 363 00:17:53,609 --> 00:17:56,779 Well, that's not what I said, is it? 364 00:17:59,416 --> 00:18:01,150 This is... 365 00:18:02,952 --> 00:18:06,122 Connor wanted you to have this. 366 00:18:19,168 --> 00:18:21,637 LARRY: Yeah, we didn't know you were friends. 367 00:18:21,738 --> 00:18:23,072 Oh, well, we didn't think 368 00:18:23,172 --> 00:18:25,975 Connor had any friends, frankly, and... 369 00:18:26,075 --> 00:18:28,778 and then we see this note, and it seems to suggest 370 00:18:28,878 --> 00:18:31,348 pretty clearly that you and Connor were, uh... 371 00:18:31,448 --> 00:18:33,950 Or at least for Connor... 372 00:18:34,050 --> 00:18:36,052 "Dear Evan Hansen." He addressed it to you. 373 00:18:36,152 --> 00:18:38,054 He wrote it to you. 374 00:18:38,154 --> 00:18:41,057 These are the words that he wanted to share with you. 375 00:18:43,860 --> 00:18:46,796 His last words. 376 00:18:48,765 --> 00:18:51,167 Connor took his own life. 377 00:18:55,339 --> 00:18:56,739 (whispers): He what? 378 00:18:57,540 --> 00:18:59,809 This is all we found with him. 379 00:18:59,909 --> 00:19:03,179 He had it folded up in his pocket. 380 00:19:07,550 --> 00:19:09,786 But this is... 381 00:19:09,886 --> 00:19:11,888 I'm sorry, Connor didn't... He... (sighs) 382 00:19:11,988 --> 00:19:13,189 He didn't write this. 383 00:19:13,289 --> 00:19:15,691 Connor didn't, Connor didn't write this. 384 00:19:15,792 --> 00:19:17,960 What-what does that mean? 385 00:19:18,061 --> 00:19:19,629 Well, he's obviously in shock. 386 00:19:19,729 --> 00:19:21,798 - I mean, if Connor didn't write this... - EVAN: I'm so sorry. 387 00:19:21,898 --> 00:19:23,766 Can I just... I should probably go, please. 388 00:19:23,866 --> 00:19:25,201 No, you don't understand. This is all that we have. 389 00:19:25,301 --> 00:19:28,137 This is the only thing that we have left. 390 00:19:28,237 --> 00:19:30,840 - LARRY: Cynthia, listen to me. - No. No. Don't-don't go. 391 00:19:30,940 --> 00:19:32,642 Okay, then you take it. Please take it, okay? 392 00:19:32,742 --> 00:19:33,676 CYNTHIA: No. No, don't go. 393 00:19:33,776 --> 00:19:36,279 Don't. Please stay. Please. 394 00:19:41,851 --> 00:19:44,854 His best and most dearest friend. 395 00:19:46,622 --> 00:19:48,291 ♪ ♪ 396 00:19:48,392 --> 00:19:50,827 - (phones chiming) - (students murmuring) 397 00:19:53,696 --> 00:19:55,932 (phones continue chiming) 398 00:19:58,569 --> 00:20:01,104 That's-that's Connor. 399 00:20:01,204 --> 00:20:02,271 Connor Murphy. 400 00:20:02,372 --> 00:20:04,240 (murmuring continues) 401 00:20:04,341 --> 00:20:05,842 - Holy shit. - (school bell ringing) 402 00:20:05,942 --> 00:20:07,344 They invited me for dinner. 403 00:20:07,444 --> 00:20:09,346 They want to know more stuff about Connor and me, 404 00:20:09,446 --> 00:20:11,448 about our... friendship. 405 00:20:11,548 --> 00:20:13,216 - A-And you said yes? - I froze. 406 00:20:13,317 --> 00:20:16,185 Well... what are you gonna tell them? 407 00:20:16,285 --> 00:20:17,554 I mean, the truth. 408 00:20:17,653 --> 00:20:19,021 I-I don't know, man. 409 00:20:19,122 --> 00:20:20,524 I mean, are you really gonna tell these people 410 00:20:20,623 --> 00:20:22,158 that the only thing they have left of their son 411 00:20:22,258 --> 00:20:24,595 is a sex letter that you wrote to yourself? 412 00:20:24,727 --> 00:20:25,828 ALANA: Hey. 413 00:20:25,928 --> 00:20:28,332 I'm so sorry. 414 00:20:28,432 --> 00:20:30,266 What the hell was that? 415 00:20:30,367 --> 00:20:32,668 I don't know. 416 00:20:32,768 --> 00:20:34,505 Oh, my God, they were so sad, his parents. 417 00:20:34,605 --> 00:20:38,074 I mean, his-his mom was just... 418 00:20:39,208 --> 00:20:41,744 I've never seen anyone so sad before. 419 00:20:42,513 --> 00:20:44,747 ♪ ♪ 420 00:20:47,850 --> 00:20:48,918 (camera clicks) 421 00:20:49,018 --> 00:20:51,254 I have to tell them. 422 00:20:53,256 --> 00:20:55,291 (birds chirping) 423 00:20:59,929 --> 00:21:02,031 (doorbell rings) 424 00:21:08,237 --> 00:21:09,439 You're early. 425 00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:12,842 Oh. S-Sorry. 426 00:21:15,211 --> 00:21:17,246 ♪ ♪ 427 00:21:24,655 --> 00:21:26,390 Sit. (chuckles) 428 00:21:31,395 --> 00:21:33,430 I hope you're hungry. 429 00:21:46,943 --> 00:21:48,911 (clears throat) 430 00:21:49,946 --> 00:21:51,448 CYNTHIA: So... 431 00:21:52,949 --> 00:21:54,418 ...you and Connor. 432 00:21:54,518 --> 00:21:57,019 You probably spent a lot of time together, I bet. 433 00:21:58,921 --> 00:22:01,491 So, um, not... 434 00:22:01,592 --> 00:22:03,259 (sighs) not really, actually. 435 00:22:03,360 --> 00:22:06,463 - Uh, the thing is that I... - We looked through his phone. 436 00:22:07,564 --> 00:22:10,266 His texts, emails. 437 00:22:10,367 --> 00:22:11,801 We didn't find anything from you. 438 00:22:11,901 --> 00:22:13,069 Yeah, no, I know. 439 00:22:13,169 --> 00:22:14,471 - I know. - He set up different accounts, 440 00:22:14,571 --> 00:22:16,105 ones we couldn't find. 441 00:22:16,205 --> 00:22:17,840 He knew you read his emails. 442 00:22:17,940 --> 00:22:20,109 Well, somebody had to be the bad guy. 443 00:22:20,209 --> 00:22:22,646 CYNTHIA: Well, if you did have any 444 00:22:22,745 --> 00:22:25,948 emails or conversations between the two of you, 445 00:22:26,048 --> 00:22:28,951 we'd love to see anything. 446 00:22:29,051 --> 00:22:31,020 - Well... - Yeah, it's-it's weird. 447 00:22:31,120 --> 00:22:33,122 Th-The only time I saw you two together was 448 00:22:33,222 --> 00:22:35,925 when he was screaming in your face at school last week. 449 00:22:36,025 --> 00:22:37,361 He was screaming at you? 450 00:22:37,461 --> 00:22:38,528 Yeah, yeah, um... 451 00:22:38,629 --> 00:22:40,397 Well, that wasn't very nice. (chuckles) 452 00:22:40,497 --> 00:22:43,899 Well, Connor wasn't very nice, so that actually makes sense. 453 00:22:46,302 --> 00:22:48,572 I think that everybody at this table can agree 454 00:22:48,672 --> 00:22:50,773 that Connor was, um... 455 00:22:51,874 --> 00:22:54,076 ...a complicated person. 456 00:22:54,176 --> 00:22:56,245 No, he was a bad person. 457 00:22:56,346 --> 00:22:59,215 - Zoe, please. - Don't pretend like you don't agree with me. 458 00:22:59,316 --> 00:23:01,851 CYNTHIA: You refuse to remember any of the good things. 459 00:23:01,951 --> 00:23:05,121 Because there were no good things. 460 00:23:05,221 --> 00:23:07,923 What-what were the good things? 461 00:23:08,024 --> 00:23:09,526 I'm not having this conversation 462 00:23:09,626 --> 00:23:12,763 - in front of our guest. - No, tell us the good things. 463 00:23:12,862 --> 00:23:14,364 What were the good things? 464 00:23:14,464 --> 00:23:16,466 - Family day at Sunny Glen? - LARRY: Zoe! 465 00:23:16,566 --> 00:23:17,833 This is not the time. 466 00:23:17,933 --> 00:23:19,436 Who knew rehab could be so much fun? 467 00:23:19,536 --> 00:23:21,003 There were good things. 468 00:23:21,672 --> 00:23:24,541 I'm not the only one. 469 00:23:24,641 --> 00:23:26,042 You remember, right? 470 00:23:29,812 --> 00:23:30,813 Right. 471 00:23:30,913 --> 00:23:32,148 Of course. 472 00:23:32,248 --> 00:23:33,883 Yes, of course there were good things. 473 00:23:33,983 --> 00:23:36,753 Tell us something. 474 00:23:36,852 --> 00:23:38,220 Please, Evan. 475 00:23:41,957 --> 00:23:43,859 Right, um... 476 00:23:43,959 --> 00:23:46,028 S... Uh, Connor and I... 477 00:23:47,263 --> 00:23:49,865 (chuckles): Uh, I d... I don't know, um... 478 00:23:51,702 --> 00:23:53,269 We had a really great... 479 00:23:53,370 --> 00:23:56,506 we had a really great time together, um... 480 00:23:56,606 --> 00:23:58,207 this one day recently. 481 00:23:58,308 --> 00:24:02,446 That's something good, um, that I remember. 482 00:24:02,546 --> 00:24:03,846 That day. 483 00:24:03,946 --> 00:24:05,615 Um... 484 00:24:05,716 --> 00:24:08,117 Yeah, that awesome day at the... 485 00:24:08,884 --> 00:24:10,953 ...um, trees. 486 00:24:12,823 --> 00:24:14,691 - Trees? - Never mind, never mind. 487 00:24:14,791 --> 00:24:17,561 I'm sorry, I don't, I don't... I shouldn't have said anything, 488 00:24:17,661 --> 00:24:19,363 and I-I knew it was stupid, so I'm sorry... 489 00:24:19,463 --> 00:24:21,063 You don't mean the orchard, do you? 490 00:24:24,133 --> 00:24:26,603 - He took you to the apple orchard? - (chuckles softly) 491 00:24:26,703 --> 00:24:28,672 - When? - Uh, once. 492 00:24:28,772 --> 00:24:30,005 Just-just once. That once. 493 00:24:30,106 --> 00:24:32,509 I thought that place closed years ago. 494 00:24:32,609 --> 00:24:34,544 Well, the hiking trails are still open though, aren't they? 495 00:24:34,644 --> 00:24:37,213 We used to go to the orchard all of the time. 496 00:24:37,314 --> 00:24:39,081 We'd do picnics there. 497 00:24:39,181 --> 00:24:40,916 Do you remember that, Zoe? 498 00:24:41,016 --> 00:24:42,452 Yeah, I do. 499 00:24:42,552 --> 00:24:45,087 And you and Connor would fly that little toy plane 500 00:24:45,187 --> 00:24:47,424 (laughs): until you crashed it into the creek. 501 00:24:48,924 --> 00:24:50,327 That was an emergency landing. 502 00:24:50,427 --> 00:24:53,497 I can't believe that he took you there. 503 00:24:53,597 --> 00:24:55,297 I bet you had fun. 504 00:24:55,399 --> 00:24:58,535 I bet the two of you... I... 505 00:24:58,635 --> 00:25:00,570 I bet that was fun. 506 00:25:01,571 --> 00:25:03,807 Yeah. 507 00:25:03,906 --> 00:25:05,709 We did. We did. 508 00:25:05,809 --> 00:25:06,710 The whole day. 509 00:25:06,810 --> 00:25:09,713 Uh, it-it was just... 510 00:25:09,813 --> 00:25:12,181 ♪ ♪ 511 00:25:12,281 --> 00:25:14,351 ♪ End of May or early June ♪ 512 00:25:14,451 --> 00:25:19,356 ♪ This picture-perfect afternoon we share ♪ 513 00:25:20,590 --> 00:25:23,527 What was the name of that ice cream place that we loved? 514 00:25:23,627 --> 00:25:24,661 Gifford's? 515 00:25:25,862 --> 00:25:26,897 A La Mode. 516 00:25:26,996 --> 00:25:28,565 CYNTHIA: That's it. A La Mode. 517 00:25:28,665 --> 00:25:30,933 And they had this homemade hot fudge. 518 00:25:31,033 --> 00:25:34,303 ♪ Drive the winding country road ♪ 519 00:25:34,404 --> 00:25:36,972 ♪ Grab a scoop at A La Mode ♪ 520 00:25:37,072 --> 00:25:38,508 ♪ And then we're there ♪ 521 00:25:38,608 --> 00:25:41,445 And we'd sit in that meadow by the pine trees, 522 00:25:41,545 --> 00:25:44,581 and you and your brother would look for four-leaf clovers. 523 00:25:44,681 --> 00:25:47,350 ♪ An open field that's framed with trees ♪ 524 00:25:47,451 --> 00:25:50,420 ♪ We pick a spot and... ♪ 525 00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:53,323 ♪ Shoot the breeze like buddies do ♪ 526 00:25:53,423 --> 00:25:56,493 ♪ Uh, quoting songs by our favorite bands ♪ 527 00:25:56,593 --> 00:25:59,329 ♪ Telling jokes no one understands ♪ 528 00:25:59,429 --> 00:26:02,031 (chuckles): ♪ Except us two ♪ 529 00:26:02,131 --> 00:26:07,069 ♪ And we talk and take in the view ♪ 530 00:26:09,171 --> 00:26:13,677 ♪ All we see is sky for forever ♪ 531 00:26:13,777 --> 00:26:19,549 ♪ We let the world pass by for forever ♪ 532 00:26:19,649 --> 00:26:25,522 ♪ Feels like we could go on for forever this way ♪ 533 00:26:27,056 --> 00:26:30,694 ♪ Two friends on a perfect day ♪ 534 00:26:32,729 --> 00:26:35,465 I'd completely forgotten about that place. 535 00:26:35,565 --> 00:26:38,869 Well, I guess Connor didn't, did he? 536 00:26:39,703 --> 00:26:42,339 ♪ We walk a while and talk about ♪ 537 00:26:42,439 --> 00:26:46,643 ♪ The things we'll do when we get out of school ♪ 538 00:26:46,743 --> 00:26:49,479 ♪ Um... (clears throat) bike the Appalachian Trail ♪ 539 00:26:49,579 --> 00:26:52,214 ♪ Or write a book or learn to sail ♪ 540 00:26:52,315 --> 00:26:54,518 ♪ Wouldn't that be cool? ♪ 541 00:26:54,618 --> 00:26:57,086 ♪ There's nothing that we can't discuss ♪ 542 00:26:57,186 --> 00:26:59,990 ♪ Like girls we wish would notice us ♪ 543 00:27:00,089 --> 00:27:02,057 ♪ But never do ♪ 544 00:27:02,157 --> 00:27:04,494 ♪ He looks around and says to me ♪ 545 00:27:04,594 --> 00:27:06,997 ♪ "There's nowhere else I'd rather be" ♪ 546 00:27:07,096 --> 00:27:08,565 ♪ And I say, "Me, too" ♪ 547 00:27:08,665 --> 00:27:13,370 ♪ And we talk and take in the view ♪ 548 00:27:14,471 --> 00:27:19,141 ♪ We just talk and take in the view ♪ 549 00:27:20,209 --> 00:27:23,647 ♪ All we see is sky for forever ♪ 550 00:27:23,747 --> 00:27:29,686 ♪ We let the world pass by for forever ♪ 551 00:27:29,786 --> 00:27:35,992 ♪ Feels like we could go on for forever this way ♪ 552 00:27:36,091 --> 00:27:40,195 ♪ This way ♪ 553 00:27:40,296 --> 00:27:45,167 ♪ All we see is light for forever ♪ 554 00:27:45,267 --> 00:27:50,006 ♪ 'Cause the sun shines bright for forever ♪ 555 00:27:50,105 --> 00:27:56,880 ♪ Like we'll be all right for forever this way ♪ 556 00:27:56,980 --> 00:28:02,284 ♪ Two friends on a perfect day ♪ 557 00:28:02,385 --> 00:28:04,253 ♪ And there he goes ♪ 558 00:28:04,354 --> 00:28:06,990 ♪ Racing toward the tallest tree ♪ 559 00:28:07,089 --> 00:28:09,258 ♪ From far across a yellow field ♪ 560 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:12,127 ♪ I hear him calling, "Follow me" ♪ 561 00:28:12,227 --> 00:28:13,797 ♪ There we go ♪ 562 00:28:13,897 --> 00:28:17,099 ♪ Wondering how the world might look from up so high ♪ 563 00:28:17,199 --> 00:28:19,636 ♪ One foot after the other ♪ 564 00:28:19,736 --> 00:28:22,038 ♪ One branch then to another ♪ 565 00:28:22,137 --> 00:28:24,139 ♪ I climb higher and higher ♪ 566 00:28:24,239 --> 00:28:27,209 ♪ I climb till the entire sun ♪ 567 00:28:27,310 --> 00:28:33,550 ♪ Shines on my face ♪ 568 00:28:35,585 --> 00:28:41,391 ♪ And I suddenly feel the branch give way ♪ 569 00:28:45,227 --> 00:28:47,296 ♪ I'm on the ground ♪ 570 00:28:48,865 --> 00:28:50,900 ♪ My arm goes numb ♪ 571 00:28:53,135 --> 00:28:54,904 ♪ I look around ♪ 572 00:28:55,005 --> 00:28:57,841 ♪ And I see him come to get me ♪ 573 00:29:00,010 --> 00:29:02,545 He's come to get me. 574 00:29:04,581 --> 00:29:07,450 ♪ And everything's okay ♪ 575 00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:14,891 ♪ All we see is sky for forever ♪ 576 00:29:14,991 --> 00:29:20,530 ♪ We let the world pass by for forever ♪ 577 00:29:21,765 --> 00:29:28,270 ♪ Buddy, you and I for forever this way ♪ 578 00:29:28,371 --> 00:29:31,441 ♪ This way ♪ 579 00:29:31,541 --> 00:29:37,113 ♪ All we see is light ♪ 580 00:29:37,212 --> 00:29:41,718 ♪ 'Cause the sun burns bright ♪ 581 00:29:41,818 --> 00:29:46,089 ♪ We could be all right for forever ♪ 582 00:29:46,188 --> 00:29:51,226 ♪ This way ♪ 583 00:29:51,327 --> 00:29:53,730 ♪ Two friends ♪ 584 00:29:55,498 --> 00:29:57,333 ♪ True friends ♪ 585 00:29:57,434 --> 00:30:00,603 ♪ On a perfect ♪ 586 00:30:01,771 --> 00:30:07,677 ♪ Day. ♪ 587 00:30:08,945 --> 00:30:11,414 Thank you, Evan. 588 00:30:11,514 --> 00:30:14,651 Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. 589 00:30:14,751 --> 00:30:16,720 (song ends) 590 00:30:17,921 --> 00:30:19,689 I mean, they think you were lovers. 591 00:30:19,789 --> 00:30:21,691 - You realize that, right? - Oh, my God. 592 00:30:21,791 --> 00:30:23,326 I thought you were gonna tell them the truth. 593 00:30:23,426 --> 00:30:24,861 I-I-I tried, but then I just... 594 00:30:24,961 --> 00:30:26,563 I got nervous and I started talking. 595 00:30:26,663 --> 00:30:28,164 And then once I started, I just... 596 00:30:28,263 --> 00:30:30,066 Couldn't stop. 597 00:30:30,166 --> 00:30:31,568 They didn't want me to stop. 598 00:30:31,668 --> 00:30:33,570 What else did you say to them? 599 00:30:33,670 --> 00:30:35,705 Uh, his mom thinks that we wrote emails to each other. 600 00:30:35,805 --> 00:30:36,940 Oh, perfect. 601 00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:39,109 Sh-She thinks he had, like, secret accounts. 602 00:30:39,209 --> 00:30:40,877 Ha, yes. Secret email accounts. 603 00:30:40,977 --> 00:30:42,912 - That's what all the cool kids are doing. - (whistle blows) 604 00:30:43,012 --> 00:30:44,347 Hansen! Kalwani! 605 00:30:44,447 --> 00:30:45,582 Pick it up! 606 00:30:45,682 --> 00:30:47,817 - No, thank you. - What was that? 607 00:30:47,917 --> 00:30:51,054 I said thank you for the encouragement! 608 00:30:51,154 --> 00:30:52,155 Fascist. 609 00:30:52,254 --> 00:30:53,857 She wants to see the emails. 610 00:30:53,957 --> 00:30:56,326 And now you want me to make a bunch of fake emails for you. 611 00:30:56,426 --> 00:30:57,827 - Classic. - You know how to do that? 612 00:30:57,927 --> 00:31:00,330 - It's simple coding. - But you failed coding. 613 00:31:00,430 --> 00:31:02,297 If you consider a D-minus failing. 614 00:31:02,398 --> 00:31:03,700 Just so we're clear, 615 00:31:03,800 --> 00:31:05,168 I charge a minimum of two grand per email, 616 00:31:05,267 --> 00:31:06,336 and that is a floor, not a ceiling. 617 00:31:06,436 --> 00:31:08,104 - $2,000? - 500. 618 00:31:08,204 --> 00:31:09,372 I didn't even ask for your help. 619 00:31:09,472 --> 00:31:10,807 250, bottom line. Take it or leave it. 620 00:31:10,907 --> 00:31:12,509 I could probably give you 20 bucks. 621 00:31:12,609 --> 00:31:14,644 Fine, but I'm not gonna act like I'm happy about it. 622 00:31:14,744 --> 00:31:16,613 ♪ ♪ 623 00:31:16,713 --> 00:31:18,348 ♪ Dear Evan Hansen ♪ 624 00:31:18,448 --> 00:31:21,584 ♪ We've been way too out of touch ♪ 625 00:31:21,684 --> 00:31:23,153 ♪ Things have been crazy ♪ 626 00:31:23,253 --> 00:31:26,356 ♪ And it sucks that we don't talk that much ♪ 627 00:31:26,456 --> 00:31:31,227 ♪ But I should tell you that I think of you each night ♪ 628 00:31:31,327 --> 00:31:35,431 ♪ I rub my nipples and start moaning with delight ♪ 629 00:31:35,532 --> 00:31:36,699 Why would you write that? 630 00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:38,168 I'm just trying to make it erotic. 631 00:31:38,268 --> 00:31:39,435 Look, if you can't take this seriously, then... 632 00:31:39,536 --> 00:31:40,703 Ugh, calm yourself, honey. 633 00:31:40,804 --> 00:31:42,205 I just want to get this over with. 634 00:31:42,304 --> 00:31:44,073 ♪ I gotta tell you ♪ 635 00:31:44,174 --> 00:31:46,576 ♪ Life without you has been hard ♪ 636 00:31:46,676 --> 00:31:47,744 - "Hard"? - ♪ Has been bad ♪ 637 00:31:47,844 --> 00:31:49,212 - "Bad"? - Has been rough. 638 00:31:49,312 --> 00:31:50,580 - Kinky. - Please stop. 639 00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:52,582 ♪ And I miss talking about life ♪ 640 00:31:52,682 --> 00:31:54,117 ♪ And other stuff ♪ 641 00:31:54,217 --> 00:31:56,052 - Very specific. - Shut up. 642 00:31:56,152 --> 00:31:58,388 - ♪ I like my parents ♪ - Who says that? 643 00:31:58,488 --> 00:32:00,356 ♪ I love my parents ♪ 644 00:32:00,456 --> 00:32:02,792 ♪ But each day's another fight ♪ 645 00:32:03,593 --> 00:32:05,395 ♪ If I stop smoking drugs ♪ 646 00:32:05,495 --> 00:32:08,064 ♪ Then everything might be all right ♪ 647 00:32:08,164 --> 00:32:09,365 "Smoking drugs"? 648 00:32:09,465 --> 00:32:10,867 Just fix it! 649 00:32:10,967 --> 00:32:13,436 - ♪ If I stop smoking crack ♪ - "Crack"? 650 00:32:13,536 --> 00:32:15,371 ♪ If I stop smoking pot ♪ 651 00:32:15,471 --> 00:32:18,374 ♪ Then everything might be all right ♪ 652 00:32:18,474 --> 00:32:20,610 ♪ I'll take your advice ♪ 653 00:32:20,710 --> 00:32:23,513 - ♪ I'll try to be more nice ♪ - (chuckles) 654 00:32:23,613 --> 00:32:24,914 ♪ I'll turn it around ♪ 655 00:32:25,014 --> 00:32:28,251 ♪ Wait and see ♪ 656 00:32:28,351 --> 00:32:33,056 ♪ 'Cause all that it takes is a little reinvention ♪ 657 00:32:33,156 --> 00:32:37,861 ♪ It's easy to change if you give it your attention ♪ 658 00:32:37,961 --> 00:32:40,430 ♪ All you got to do is just believe ♪ 659 00:32:40,530 --> 00:32:43,233 ♪ You can be who you want to be ♪ 660 00:32:43,334 --> 00:32:45,535 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 661 00:32:45,635 --> 00:32:46,970 Are we done? 662 00:32:47,070 --> 00:32:48,638 Well, I mean, I can't just show them one email. 663 00:32:48,738 --> 00:32:50,640 I want to show that I was, like, a good friend. 664 00:32:50,740 --> 00:32:52,942 That I was trying to help him, you know? 665 00:32:53,042 --> 00:32:54,410 Oh, my God. 666 00:32:54,510 --> 00:32:56,512 ♪ Dear Connor Murphy ♪ 667 00:32:56,613 --> 00:33:00,049 ♪ Yes, I also miss our talks ♪ 668 00:33:00,149 --> 00:33:01,584 ♪ Stop doing drugs ♪ 669 00:33:01,684 --> 00:33:04,321 ♪ Just try to take deep breaths and go on walks ♪ 670 00:33:04,420 --> 00:33:06,422 - No. - ♪ I'm sending pictures ♪ 671 00:33:06,522 --> 00:33:08,424 ♪ Of the most amazing trees ♪ 672 00:33:08,524 --> 00:33:09,759 No. 673 00:33:09,859 --> 00:33:11,427 ♪ You'll be obsessed with ♪ 674 00:33:11,527 --> 00:33:14,297 - ♪ All my forest expertise ♪ - What? 675 00:33:14,397 --> 00:33:17,267 ♪ Dude, I'm proud of you ♪ 676 00:33:17,368 --> 00:33:20,069 ♪ Just keep pushing through ♪ 677 00:33:20,169 --> 00:33:22,238 ♪ You're turning around, I can see ♪ 678 00:33:22,339 --> 00:33:24,107 ♪ Just wait and see ♪ 679 00:33:24,207 --> 00:33:29,445 ♪ 'Cause all that it takes is a little reinvention ♪ 680 00:33:29,545 --> 00:33:34,385 ♪ It's easy to change if you give it your attention ♪ 681 00:33:34,484 --> 00:33:36,886 ♪ All you got to do is just believe ♪ 682 00:33:36,986 --> 00:33:39,622 ♪ You can be who you want to be ♪ 683 00:33:39,722 --> 00:33:41,524 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 684 00:33:41,624 --> 00:33:42,692 ♪ My sister's hot ♪ 685 00:33:42,792 --> 00:33:44,460 - What the hell? - My bad. 686 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:45,962 ♪ Dear Evan Hansen ♪ 687 00:33:46,062 --> 00:33:49,599 ♪ Thanks for every note you send ♪ 688 00:33:49,699 --> 00:33:50,967 ♪ Dear Connor Murphy ♪ 689 00:33:51,067 --> 00:33:54,371 ♪ I'm just glad to be your friend ♪ 690 00:33:54,470 --> 00:33:56,773 ♪ Our friendship goes beyond ♪ 691 00:33:56,873 --> 00:33:59,310 ♪ Your average kind of bond ♪ 692 00:33:59,410 --> 00:34:01,611 ♪ But not because they're gay ♪ 693 00:34:01,711 --> 00:34:03,212 ♪ No, not because... ♪ 694 00:34:03,314 --> 00:34:04,580 ♪ Well, anyway ♪ 695 00:34:04,681 --> 00:34:06,783 ♪ You're getting better every day ♪ 696 00:34:06,883 --> 00:34:09,018 ♪ I'm getting better every day ♪ 697 00:34:09,118 --> 00:34:10,520 - ♪ Keep ♪ - ♪ Getting ♪ 698 00:34:10,620 --> 00:34:11,322 - ♪ Better ♪ - ♪ Every ♪ 699 00:34:11,422 --> 00:34:12,423 ♪ Day ♪ 700 00:34:12,522 --> 00:34:14,023 ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey ♪ 701 00:34:14,123 --> 00:34:18,995 ♪ 'Cause all that it takes is a little reinvention ♪ 702 00:34:19,095 --> 00:34:23,833 ♪ It's easy to change if you give it your attention ♪ 703 00:34:23,933 --> 00:34:26,502 ♪ All you got to do is just believe ♪ 704 00:34:26,602 --> 00:34:29,205 ♪ You can be who you want to be ♪ 705 00:34:29,305 --> 00:34:31,274 ♪ Sincerely ♪ 706 00:34:31,375 --> 00:34:34,177 ♪ Miss you dearly ♪ 707 00:34:34,277 --> 00:34:36,846 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 708 00:34:37,613 --> 00:34:39,215 ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 709 00:34:39,983 --> 00:34:43,486 (harmonizing): ♪ Sincerely, Me ♪ 710 00:34:43,586 --> 00:34:45,254 ♪ Sincerely, Me. ♪ 711 00:34:45,356 --> 00:34:47,190 (song ends) 712 00:34:48,992 --> 00:34:51,661 I can't remember the last time that I heard him laugh, 713 00:34:51,761 --> 00:34:53,696 but the two of them, if you read these... 714 00:34:53,796 --> 00:34:55,598 I think if you could take ten minutes 715 00:34:55,698 --> 00:34:57,500 and actually read these emails... 716 00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:59,702 I'm looking at them right now. 717 00:34:59,802 --> 00:35:01,838 (sportscast playing on TV) 718 00:35:01,938 --> 00:35:04,540 Zoe. Look what Evan sent us. 719 00:35:04,640 --> 00:35:07,076 They're emails from your brother. 720 00:35:07,176 --> 00:35:08,312 I printed them out. 721 00:35:08,412 --> 00:35:10,580 Oh. Take that, trees. 722 00:35:10,680 --> 00:35:12,181 - How was school? - Terrific. 723 00:35:12,281 --> 00:35:14,351 All of a sudden, people I've never met 724 00:35:14,451 --> 00:35:15,818 want to be my best friend. 725 00:35:15,918 --> 00:35:18,654 I'm the dead kid's sister, didn't you know? 726 00:35:19,456 --> 00:35:20,690 I'm sure they mean well. 727 00:35:20,790 --> 00:35:23,026 I'm sure they don't. 728 00:35:24,660 --> 00:35:26,796 (footsteps ascending stairs) 729 00:35:26,896 --> 00:35:28,631 (door closes upstairs) 730 00:35:29,532 --> 00:35:31,368 She needs time. 731 00:35:32,201 --> 00:35:35,071 No, Larry, she needs her parents. 732 00:35:35,171 --> 00:35:37,273 Enjoy the game. 733 00:35:38,041 --> 00:35:40,143 - (playing gentle music) - (knock on door) 734 00:35:43,146 --> 00:35:44,515 (knock on door) 735 00:35:44,614 --> 00:35:46,082 Can I come in? 736 00:35:49,185 --> 00:35:50,421 Oh. 737 00:35:50,521 --> 00:35:53,089 You don't have to stop playing. 738 00:35:54,090 --> 00:35:55,992 How was band? 739 00:35:58,495 --> 00:36:01,498 You know, he-he talks about you playing guitar, 740 00:36:01,597 --> 00:36:05,402 in one of his emails, at the spring concert last year. 741 00:36:05,502 --> 00:36:07,270 Really? 742 00:36:07,371 --> 00:36:08,304 (softly): Yeah. 743 00:36:08,405 --> 00:36:11,974 Does he, does he talk about 744 00:36:12,075 --> 00:36:14,243 when he disappeared for two days? 745 00:36:14,344 --> 00:36:17,314 But then he called me and asked me to come pick him up. 746 00:36:17,414 --> 00:36:18,681 He wanted to come home, 747 00:36:18,781 --> 00:36:20,216 but he wasn't ready to talk to you yet, 748 00:36:20,317 --> 00:36:23,454 so I took the bus all the way downtown to get him, 749 00:36:23,554 --> 00:36:26,155 and guess what. 750 00:36:28,958 --> 00:36:31,828 All he really wanted was money. 751 00:36:34,331 --> 00:36:38,734 And I gave it to him because I was 12. 752 00:36:41,270 --> 00:36:43,272 He was struggling. 753 00:36:45,375 --> 00:36:47,810 How about the time he tried to punch through my door, 754 00:36:47,910 --> 00:36:49,313 screaming at the top of his lungs, 755 00:36:49,413 --> 00:36:52,416 saying he was gonna kill me for no reason? 756 00:36:52,516 --> 00:36:54,784 Is that email in there? 757 00:36:56,219 --> 00:36:58,688 We're all grieving in our own way. 758 00:37:05,462 --> 00:37:09,399 You might consider reading these when you're ready. 759 00:37:10,700 --> 00:37:13,069 They might help more than you think. 760 00:37:19,443 --> 00:37:21,677 ♪ ♪ 761 00:37:30,253 --> 00:37:33,490 ♪ Why should I play this game of pretend? ♪ 762 00:37:34,657 --> 00:37:39,295 ♪ Remembering through a secondhand sorrow ♪ 763 00:37:39,396 --> 00:37:43,299 ♪ Such a great son and wonderful friend ♪ 764 00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:47,904 ♪ Oh, don't the tears just pour ♪ 765 00:37:48,771 --> 00:37:52,175 ♪ I could curl up and hide in my room ♪ 766 00:37:53,276 --> 00:37:57,813 ♪ Here in my bed still sobbing tomorrow ♪ 767 00:37:57,914 --> 00:38:01,918 ♪ I could give in to all of the gloom ♪ 768 00:38:02,018 --> 00:38:06,923 ♪ But tell me, tell me what for ♪ 769 00:38:07,023 --> 00:38:09,992 ♪ Why should I have a heavy heart? ♪ 770 00:38:10,092 --> 00:38:12,962 ♪ Why should I start to break in pieces? ♪ 771 00:38:13,062 --> 00:38:17,334 ♪ Why should I go and fall apart for you? ♪ 772 00:38:19,135 --> 00:38:24,575 ♪ Why should I play the grieving girl ♪ 773 00:38:24,675 --> 00:38:27,444 ♪ And lie ♪ 774 00:38:27,544 --> 00:38:32,382 ♪ Saying that I miss you and that my world ♪ 775 00:38:32,482 --> 00:38:37,954 ♪ Has gone dark without your light? ♪ 776 00:38:39,556 --> 00:38:42,792 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 777 00:38:44,461 --> 00:38:45,696 ♪ Tonight ♪ 778 00:38:45,795 --> 00:38:48,030 ♪ ♪ 779 00:38:53,570 --> 00:38:57,039 ♪ We gave you the world, you threw it away ♪ 780 00:38:58,274 --> 00:39:02,745 ♪ Leaving these broken pieces behind you ♪ 781 00:39:02,845 --> 00:39:06,916 ♪ Everything wasted, nothing to say ♪ 782 00:39:07,016 --> 00:39:09,852 ♪ So I can sing no requiem ♪ 783 00:39:09,952 --> 00:39:14,257 ♪ I hear your voice and feel you near ♪ 784 00:39:14,358 --> 00:39:19,128 ♪ Within these words I finally find you ♪ 785 00:39:19,228 --> 00:39:23,533 ♪ And now that I know that you are still here ♪ 786 00:39:23,634 --> 00:39:26,769 ♪ I will sing no requiem tonight ♪ 787 00:39:26,869 --> 00:39:29,573 ♪ Why should I have a heavy heart? ♪ 788 00:39:29,673 --> 00:39:32,476 ♪ Why should I say I'll keep you with me? ♪ 789 00:39:32,576 --> 00:39:38,281 ♪ Why should I go and fall apart for you? ♪ 790 00:39:38,382 --> 00:39:41,117 - ♪ Why ♪ - (Larry and Cynthia harmonizing) 791 00:39:41,217 --> 00:39:43,420 ♪ Should I play the grieving girl ♪ 792 00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:46,523 ♪ And lie ♪ 793 00:39:46,623 --> 00:39:49,258 ♪ Saying that I miss you and that ♪ 794 00:39:49,359 --> 00:39:53,162 LARRY and ZOE: ♪ My world has gone dark without your light? ♪ 795 00:39:53,262 --> 00:39:57,734 CYNTHIA: ♪ I can see your light ♪ 796 00:39:57,833 --> 00:40:01,338 ZOE: ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 797 00:40:01,438 --> 00:40:03,205 ♪ Tonight ♪ 798 00:40:03,307 --> 00:40:05,841 ♪ 'Cause when the villains fall ♪ 799 00:40:05,941 --> 00:40:08,545 ♪ The kingdoms never weep ♪ 800 00:40:08,645 --> 00:40:13,317 ♪ No one lights a candle to remember ♪ 801 00:40:13,417 --> 00:40:16,520 ♪ No, no one mourns at all ♪ 802 00:40:16,620 --> 00:40:19,656 - ♪ When they lay them down to sleep ♪ - (engine revving) 803 00:40:19,756 --> 00:40:26,630 ♪ So don't tell me that I didn't have it right ♪ 804 00:40:26,730 --> 00:40:31,635 ♪ Don't tell me that it wasn't black and white ♪ 805 00:40:31,735 --> 00:40:34,203 ♪ After all you put me through ♪ 806 00:40:34,303 --> 00:40:37,441 ♪ Don't say it wasn't true ♪ 807 00:40:37,541 --> 00:40:41,243 ♪ That you were not the monster ♪ 808 00:40:41,345 --> 00:40:43,846 - (tires squeal) - (music stops) 809 00:40:49,919 --> 00:40:52,154 - ♪ That I knew ♪ - (music resumes) 810 00:40:55,157 --> 00:40:58,260 ♪ 'Cause I ♪ 811 00:40:58,362 --> 00:41:03,600 ♪ Cannot play the grieving girl and lie ♪ 812 00:41:03,700 --> 00:41:08,805 ♪ Saying that I miss you and that my world ♪ 813 00:41:08,904 --> 00:41:11,140 ♪ Has gone dark ♪ 814 00:41:15,244 --> 00:41:19,148 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 815 00:41:20,049 --> 00:41:23,919 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 816 00:41:24,821 --> 00:41:28,023 ♪ I will sing no requiem ♪ 817 00:41:29,959 --> 00:41:31,428 ♪ Tonight ♪ 818 00:41:31,528 --> 00:41:33,996 LARRY and CYNTHIA: ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 819 00:41:34,096 --> 00:41:36,265 ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 820 00:41:36,366 --> 00:41:38,835 ZOE: ♪ Oh, oh ♪ 821 00:41:38,934 --> 00:41:44,006 ALL (harmonizing): ♪ Oh, oh. ♪ 822 00:41:44,106 --> 00:41:45,776 (song ends) 823 00:41:45,876 --> 00:41:47,778 HEIDI: They did a whole thing about them on NPR yesterday, 824 00:41:47,878 --> 00:41:49,111 these-these essay contests. 825 00:41:49,211 --> 00:41:50,514 And if you win, 826 00:41:50,614 --> 00:41:52,114 it doesn't count against any financial aid. 827 00:41:52,214 --> 00:41:57,052 You know, so $5,000 here or $3,000 there. 828 00:41:57,153 --> 00:41:59,255 It adds up, and we're gonna need 829 00:41:59,356 --> 00:42:01,491 all the help we can get with college. 830 00:42:01,591 --> 00:42:04,861 I mean, unless your stepmother has some trust fund for you 831 00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:07,296 that I don't know about with all those fabulous tips 832 00:42:07,397 --> 00:42:08,865 - she made cocktail waitressing. - Huh. 833 00:42:08,964 --> 00:42:10,867 - Right? (chuckles) - (chuckles) 834 00:42:10,966 --> 00:42:12,469 Mm. 835 00:42:14,738 --> 00:42:15,938 (clears throat) 836 00:42:16,038 --> 00:42:17,407 (sniffs) 837 00:42:17,507 --> 00:42:18,708 I got a... 838 00:42:18,809 --> 00:42:21,578 I got an email from your school yesterday, 839 00:42:21,678 --> 00:42:25,682 um, about that boy that-that killed himself. 840 00:42:25,782 --> 00:42:26,949 Connor Murphy? 841 00:42:27,049 --> 00:42:28,718 Yeah. 842 00:42:28,819 --> 00:42:30,353 I didn't really know him, so... 843 00:42:30,454 --> 00:42:35,090 You know, if you ever want to talk about anything... 844 00:42:35,191 --> 00:42:37,092 You know, I mean, I mean, I know that lately 845 00:42:37,193 --> 00:42:38,495 it feels like I'm-I'm always working. 846 00:42:38,595 --> 00:42:40,363 - It's fine. - But I'm-I'm-I'm here, 847 00:42:40,464 --> 00:42:42,998 and if I... If I'm not here, I'm just a phone call away 848 00:42:43,098 --> 00:42:44,734 or an email or a text, you know, whatever. 849 00:42:44,835 --> 00:42:46,302 I know. 850 00:42:47,102 --> 00:42:49,940 It says "Connor" on your cast. 851 00:42:50,039 --> 00:42:52,107 Oh. 852 00:42:52,208 --> 00:42:53,610 No, no, yeah. Um... 853 00:42:53,710 --> 00:42:55,978 - You said you didn't know him. - Sorry, I didn't. 854 00:42:56,078 --> 00:42:57,781 Um... 855 00:42:57,881 --> 00:43:00,550 It's in memory, so, like... 856 00:43:00,650 --> 00:43:02,853 Y-You know, kids are, like, um... 857 00:43:02,953 --> 00:43:04,688 they're writing his name on-on... 858 00:43:04,788 --> 00:43:07,657 lockers and stuff like that. 859 00:43:07,757 --> 00:43:09,225 (sighs): Oh. 860 00:43:10,961 --> 00:43:13,028 Um... 861 00:43:15,164 --> 00:43:18,267 That's lovely. You know, in memory. 862 00:43:18,368 --> 00:43:19,769 (softly): Hmm. 863 00:43:22,506 --> 00:43:23,305 Hey. 864 00:43:23,406 --> 00:43:25,274 Tuesday. What are you doing? 865 00:43:26,376 --> 00:43:28,945 When's the last time we did Taco Tuesday? 866 00:43:29,044 --> 00:43:30,680 That'd be great. 867 00:43:30,780 --> 00:43:32,716 Really? 868 00:43:32,816 --> 00:43:34,216 (chuckles): Yeah. 869 00:43:34,317 --> 00:43:36,218 ALANA: So the memorial's really just an opportunity 870 00:43:36,319 --> 00:43:38,120 for all of us to come together as a community 871 00:43:38,220 --> 00:43:41,625 and to remember Connor and celebrate who he was. 872 00:43:42,592 --> 00:43:44,059 Would you want to speak or perform? 873 00:43:44,159 --> 00:43:45,962 I didn't really know him. I'm sorry. 874 00:43:46,061 --> 00:43:48,197 - That's okay. - Bye. 875 00:44:00,310 --> 00:44:01,578 Want a wristband? 876 00:44:01,678 --> 00:44:03,980 Oh, yes. Yeah. Okay. 877 00:44:04,079 --> 00:44:05,448 Thank you. 878 00:44:08,250 --> 00:44:10,085 You were friends with him, right? 879 00:44:11,421 --> 00:44:13,323 I saw him sign your cast in the library, 880 00:44:13,423 --> 00:44:15,992 and you started arguing about something. 881 00:44:16,860 --> 00:44:19,563 - Were you friends with him? - We weren't close. 882 00:44:19,663 --> 00:44:22,365 We presented together o-on Huck Finn in the tenth grade, 883 00:44:22,465 --> 00:44:25,301 but he probably didn't tell you that. (chuckles) 884 00:44:25,402 --> 00:44:27,169 Um, no, no, I didn't know. 885 00:44:27,269 --> 00:44:29,339 I always really liked him. 886 00:44:29,439 --> 00:44:31,041 It seemed like he didn't really care 887 00:44:31,140 --> 00:44:33,009 what anyone else thought, and... 888 00:44:33,108 --> 00:44:34,911 (chuckles): I thought that was pretty remarkable. 889 00:44:35,011 --> 00:44:36,846 (chuckles) 890 00:44:38,715 --> 00:44:41,116 Well, I'm putting together a memorial for him 891 00:44:41,216 --> 00:44:43,285 at school on Friday. 892 00:44:43,386 --> 00:44:44,821 If you wanted to do something... 893 00:44:44,921 --> 00:44:47,256 Oh. Um... 894 00:44:47,357 --> 00:44:49,459 Sorry, I-I... 895 00:44:49,559 --> 00:44:53,128 I-I probably w-would rather not, if that's okay. 896 00:44:53,228 --> 00:44:54,263 Yeah, sure. 897 00:44:54,364 --> 00:44:56,800 If you change your mind... 898 00:44:56,900 --> 00:44:58,068 just text me. 899 00:44:58,167 --> 00:44:59,569 (chuckles softly) 900 00:45:02,038 --> 00:45:04,173 EVAN (chuckles): Okay. 901 00:45:09,211 --> 00:45:10,714 (door closes) 902 00:45:10,814 --> 00:45:12,214 Mom. 903 00:45:19,288 --> 00:45:21,524 ♪ ♪ 904 00:45:39,776 --> 00:45:41,811 ♪ ♪ 905 00:45:50,387 --> 00:45:52,455 My mom realized we were out of ice cream, 906 00:45:52,555 --> 00:45:54,624 so they went to go get more. 907 00:45:55,425 --> 00:45:57,327 Did you park in the driveway? 908 00:45:57,427 --> 00:45:59,763 'Cause if you park on the street, they'll ticket you. 909 00:45:59,863 --> 00:46:01,731 The people in this neighborhood are monsters. 910 00:46:01,831 --> 00:46:03,867 Um, no, I didn't, I didn't, um... 911 00:46:03,967 --> 00:46:06,069 I took the bus. My mom needed the car for work. 912 00:46:06,168 --> 00:46:08,138 - What about your dad? - My dad. 913 00:46:08,237 --> 00:46:10,840 Um, he lives in Colorado, so... 914 00:46:10,940 --> 00:46:13,175 He left when I was seven. 915 00:46:14,077 --> 00:46:15,612 (sighs) 916 00:46:15,712 --> 00:46:17,279 That sucks. 917 00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:21,785 Mine died when I was one, so... 918 00:46:21,885 --> 00:46:23,086 I sort of win. 919 00:46:23,185 --> 00:46:24,087 (chuckles softly) 920 00:46:24,186 --> 00:46:26,122 - Sorry. - Thanks. 921 00:46:26,221 --> 00:46:27,657 It's fine. 922 00:46:27,757 --> 00:46:30,894 I-I don't even really remember him, to be honest. 923 00:46:30,994 --> 00:46:33,797 Connor did, though, a little. 924 00:46:33,897 --> 00:46:35,765 That's terrible. 925 00:46:35,865 --> 00:46:37,199 (sighs) Yeah. 926 00:46:37,299 --> 00:46:41,203 And then Larry showed up, fixed everything. 927 00:46:42,372 --> 00:46:44,541 For a while, at least. 928 00:46:44,641 --> 00:46:46,009 Yeah. 929 00:46:46,109 --> 00:46:48,745 Most people, with Connor, they just would've been like, 930 00:46:48,845 --> 00:46:53,583 "See ya," but he's the only dad we ever really knew, so... 931 00:46:54,918 --> 00:46:57,087 Wow, your mom... I didn't, I didn't realize. 932 00:46:57,187 --> 00:46:58,555 Yeah, well. 933 00:46:58,655 --> 00:47:01,057 She's in total denial now. 934 00:47:01,157 --> 00:47:02,459 So is Larry. 935 00:47:02,559 --> 00:47:04,094 I mean, he didn't even cry at the funeral. 936 00:47:04,194 --> 00:47:05,462 I'm sorry. 937 00:47:06,429 --> 00:47:08,998 (singsongy): Not as sorry as you're gonna be. 938 00:47:10,734 --> 00:47:12,702 - Oh, is-is that the... - Mm-hmm. 939 00:47:12,802 --> 00:47:16,206 Gluten-free apple pie? You bet. 940 00:47:16,305 --> 00:47:17,874 It-it looks... 941 00:47:19,409 --> 00:47:21,177 - Inedible? - (chuckles) 942 00:47:21,276 --> 00:47:22,846 It is. 943 00:47:23,713 --> 00:47:26,616 Just be glad we get to have real ice cream. 944 00:47:26,716 --> 00:47:28,618 My mom was Buddhist last year, 945 00:47:28,718 --> 00:47:30,420 so we couldn't have any animal products. 946 00:47:30,520 --> 00:47:32,889 She was B... um, Buddhist last year but not this year? 947 00:47:32,989 --> 00:47:35,358 Yep. That's sort of what she does. 948 00:47:35,458 --> 00:47:37,227 She gets into a lot of different things. 949 00:47:37,327 --> 00:47:40,430 - Mm. - For a while, it was Pilates. 950 00:47:40,530 --> 00:47:42,297 The Secret. 951 00:47:42,398 --> 00:47:44,200 Buddhism. Et cetera. 952 00:47:44,299 --> 00:47:46,536 It's cool that she's interested in so much different stuff. 953 00:47:46,636 --> 00:47:47,871 Yeah, she's not, though. 954 00:47:47,971 --> 00:47:50,073 That's just what happens when you're rich 955 00:47:50,173 --> 00:47:51,141 and you don't have a job. 956 00:47:51,241 --> 00:47:52,342 You get a little crazy. 957 00:47:52,442 --> 00:47:53,610 (chuckles) Well, my mom always says 958 00:47:53,710 --> 00:47:55,211 it's better to be rich than poor, so... 959 00:47:55,311 --> 00:47:56,880 Yeah, well, your mom's probably never been rich, then. 960 00:47:56,980 --> 00:47:58,848 Yeah, you've probably never been poor. 961 00:48:00,917 --> 00:48:02,318 Oh, my God, I can't believe I just said that. 962 00:48:02,418 --> 00:48:03,653 I'm so sorry. 963 00:48:03,753 --> 00:48:05,722 (laughing): Wow. I didn't realize 964 00:48:05,822 --> 00:48:08,224 you were capable of saying something that wasn't nice. 965 00:48:08,324 --> 00:48:09,859 I'm n... I'm not. I'm really sorry. 966 00:48:09,959 --> 00:48:12,428 You really don't have to keep saying that. 967 00:48:12,529 --> 00:48:14,430 (softly): Okay. 968 00:48:14,531 --> 00:48:16,599 You want to say it again. 969 00:48:16,699 --> 00:48:18,134 Yeah, very much so, I do. 970 00:48:18,234 --> 00:48:19,803 (laughs) 971 00:48:25,141 --> 00:48:27,710 Why did he write that... 972 00:48:27,811 --> 00:48:29,012 in his note? 973 00:48:29,112 --> 00:48:31,047 "Because there's Zoe. 974 00:48:31,147 --> 00:48:34,818 And I don't even know her, but if I could just talk to her..." 975 00:48:37,320 --> 00:48:39,422 Honestly, I really don't know. 976 00:48:39,522 --> 00:48:42,125 What does any of that even mean? I mean... 977 00:48:42,225 --> 00:48:44,360 We weren't close at all. 978 00:48:44,460 --> 00:48:46,729 Not since we were kids. 979 00:48:46,830 --> 00:48:48,832 He never noticed anything about me. 980 00:48:48,932 --> 00:48:51,434 That's not true. That's not true. 981 00:48:51,534 --> 00:48:53,803 He-he-he noticed a lot of things about you. 982 00:48:53,903 --> 00:48:55,605 Like what things? 983 00:49:02,178 --> 00:49:03,746 (sighs) 984 00:49:05,515 --> 00:49:06,783 Right. 985 00:49:06,883 --> 00:49:07,784 No, no, no. 986 00:49:07,884 --> 00:49:09,886 That's, um... 987 00:49:09,986 --> 00:49:11,054 Well... 988 00:49:11,154 --> 00:49:12,956 Okay, w... Okay. 989 00:49:13,056 --> 00:49:15,091 Here's something. Um... 990 00:49:15,191 --> 00:49:18,828 Whenever you have, uh, a solo in-in jazz band, 991 00:49:18,928 --> 00:49:21,030 you just... (sighs) you close your e... 992 00:49:21,130 --> 00:49:22,599 you probably don't even know you're doing this, 993 00:49:22,699 --> 00:49:25,101 but you close your eyes, um, and you get, like... 994 00:49:25,201 --> 00:49:26,870 I don't know, it's like a half smile, 995 00:49:26,970 --> 00:49:28,671 like you just heard the funniest thing in the world, 996 00:49:28,771 --> 00:49:30,206 but it's a secret and you can't tell anyone about it. 997 00:49:30,306 --> 00:49:31,841 But then... 998 00:49:31,941 --> 00:49:33,843 uh, the way that you smile, it's sort of like you are... 999 00:49:33,943 --> 00:49:36,679 you're letting us in on the secret, too. 1000 00:49:36,779 --> 00:49:38,514 - Um... - ♪ ♪ 1001 00:49:38,615 --> 00:49:40,783 ♪ He said ♪ 1002 00:49:40,884 --> 00:49:42,685 ♪ There's nothing like your smile ♪ 1003 00:49:42,785 --> 00:49:46,856 ♪ Sort of subtle and perfect and real ♪ 1004 00:49:47,924 --> 00:49:52,962 ♪ He said you never knew how wonderful ♪ 1005 00:49:53,062 --> 00:49:57,100 ♪ That smile could make someone feel ♪ 1006 00:49:58,501 --> 00:50:02,305 ♪ And he knew whenever you get bored ♪ 1007 00:50:02,405 --> 00:50:07,210 ♪ You scribble stars on the cuffs of your jeans ♪ 1008 00:50:08,444 --> 00:50:12,849 ♪ And he noticed that you still fill out the quizzes ♪ 1009 00:50:12,949 --> 00:50:15,752 ♪ That they put in those teen magazines ♪ 1010 00:50:15,852 --> 00:50:17,720 I-I do that ironically. 1011 00:50:17,820 --> 00:50:22,992 ♪ But he kept it all inside his head ♪ 1012 00:50:23,092 --> 00:50:27,730 ♪ What he saw he left unsaid ♪ 1013 00:50:27,830 --> 00:50:30,533 ♪ And though he wanted to ♪ 1014 00:50:30,633 --> 00:50:32,235 ♪ He couldn't talk to you ♪ 1015 00:50:32,336 --> 00:50:35,738 ♪ He couldn't find a way ♪ 1016 00:50:37,341 --> 00:50:41,844 ♪ But he would always say ♪ 1017 00:50:41,945 --> 00:50:45,581 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1018 00:50:45,682 --> 00:50:47,650 ♪ Tell her everything I see ♪ 1019 00:50:47,750 --> 00:50:50,421 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1020 00:50:50,520 --> 00:50:53,623 ♪ How she's everything to me ♪ 1021 00:50:53,723 --> 00:50:58,561 ♪ But we're a million worlds apart ♪ 1022 00:50:59,696 --> 00:51:03,833 ♪ And I don't know how I would even start ♪ 1023 00:51:03,933 --> 00:51:08,104 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1024 00:51:08,905 --> 00:51:14,510 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1025 00:51:15,778 --> 00:51:18,247 Did he say anything else? 1026 00:51:18,349 --> 00:51:19,682 About you? 1027 00:51:19,782 --> 00:51:21,184 N-Never mind. I don't even care, all right? 1028 00:51:21,284 --> 00:51:22,752 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. He said so many things. 1029 00:51:22,852 --> 00:51:24,153 I'm trying to... I'm just... 1030 00:51:24,253 --> 00:51:26,089 I'm trying to remember the best ones, so... 1031 00:51:26,189 --> 00:51:27,290 Um... 1032 00:51:27,391 --> 00:51:31,227 ♪ He thought it looked pretty cool ♪ 1033 00:51:31,328 --> 00:51:34,831 ♪ When you put indigo streaks in your hair ♪ 1034 00:51:34,931 --> 00:51:37,000 - No fucking way. - (laughs) 1035 00:51:37,100 --> 00:51:40,803 ♪ And he wondered how you learned to dance ♪ 1036 00:51:40,903 --> 00:51:46,709 ♪ Like all the rest of the world isn't there ♪ 1037 00:51:46,809 --> 00:51:51,748 ♪ But he kept it all inside his head ♪ 1038 00:51:51,848 --> 00:51:56,519 ♪ What he saw he left unsaid ♪ 1039 00:51:56,619 --> 00:51:59,555 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1040 00:51:59,655 --> 00:52:01,492 ♪ Tell her everything I see ♪ 1041 00:52:01,591 --> 00:52:04,027 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1042 00:52:04,127 --> 00:52:06,397 ♪ How she's everything to me ♪ 1043 00:52:06,497 --> 00:52:11,968 (harmonizing): ♪ But we're a million worlds apart ♪ 1044 00:52:13,736 --> 00:52:17,740 ♪ And I don't know how I would even start ♪ 1045 00:52:17,840 --> 00:52:22,111 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1046 00:52:22,912 --> 00:52:25,114 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1047 00:52:25,214 --> 00:52:30,387 ♪ But what do you do when there's this great divide? ♪ 1048 00:52:30,487 --> 00:52:35,091 ♪ He just seemed so far away ♪ 1049 00:52:35,191 --> 00:52:39,295 ♪ And what do you do when the distance is too wide? ♪ 1050 00:52:39,396 --> 00:52:40,696 ♪ It's like I don't know anything ♪ 1051 00:52:40,797 --> 00:52:42,865 ♪ How do you say ♪ 1052 00:52:42,965 --> 00:52:47,136 ♪ I love you? ♪ 1053 00:52:47,904 --> 00:52:51,841 ♪ I love you ♪ 1054 00:52:52,608 --> 00:52:57,314 ♪ I love you ♪ 1055 00:52:58,315 --> 00:53:02,718 ♪ I love you ♪ 1056 00:53:05,788 --> 00:53:13,162 ♪ But we're a million worlds apart ♪ 1057 00:53:14,931 --> 00:53:18,701 ♪ And I don't know how I would even start ♪ 1058 00:53:20,404 --> 00:53:26,275 ♪ If I could tell her ♪ 1059 00:53:26,376 --> 00:53:30,780 ♪ If I could. ♪ 1060 00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:33,116 (song ends) 1061 00:53:35,586 --> 00:53:37,787 - (door opens) - CYNTHIA: Hello. 1062 00:53:37,887 --> 00:53:39,722 - EVAN: Oh, sorry. - ZOE: Uh... 1063 00:53:39,822 --> 00:53:41,991 - (door closes) - Oh, you beat us. 1064 00:53:42,091 --> 00:53:43,659 Um, Zoe, can you help serve? 1065 00:53:43,759 --> 00:53:45,294 - ZOE: Yeah. - Larry, get the plates. 1066 00:53:45,395 --> 00:53:46,729 Can I do anything? 1067 00:53:46,829 --> 00:53:48,097 No, no, no. You're the guest. You sit down. 1068 00:53:48,197 --> 00:53:50,266 We asked if they had any soy ice cream, 1069 00:53:50,367 --> 00:53:54,605 but the guy at the store said there was just no "whey," so... 1070 00:53:54,704 --> 00:53:56,105 When are you gonna give up that joke? 1071 00:53:56,205 --> 00:53:57,907 LARRY: I think never, actually. 1072 00:53:58,007 --> 00:53:59,275 CYNTHIA: You don't have to laugh at that. Please don't. 1073 00:53:59,376 --> 00:54:00,611 - (Evan chuckles) - Oh. 1074 00:54:00,710 --> 00:54:03,146 I'm sorry, but there's no way 1075 00:54:03,246 --> 00:54:05,616 (laughs): you'd ever be able to tell in a million years 1076 00:54:05,715 --> 00:54:06,883 that this was gluten-free. 1077 00:54:06,983 --> 00:54:08,784 Mom, come on. Look at it. 1078 00:54:08,885 --> 00:54:11,622 A million years is, uh... that's a lot of years. 1079 00:54:11,721 --> 00:54:14,290 Do you see what I have to deal with? 1080 00:54:15,359 --> 00:54:16,460 I'm glad you're here. 1081 00:54:16,560 --> 00:54:18,794 ♪ ♪ 1082 00:54:28,405 --> 00:54:30,440 (sighs) 1083 00:54:34,677 --> 00:54:36,078 (phone chimes) 1084 00:54:43,353 --> 00:54:44,854 (sighs softly) 1085 00:54:44,954 --> 00:54:46,923 EVAN: "The Connor Project." 1086 00:54:47,023 --> 00:54:48,824 So, it's a student group dedicated to 1087 00:54:48,925 --> 00:54:52,128 mental health awareness, outreach and education. 1088 00:54:53,029 --> 00:54:55,432 Uh, great. This is... it's great. 1089 00:54:57,166 --> 00:54:58,768 You know the Murphys, right? 1090 00:54:58,868 --> 00:55:01,003 - Mm-hmm. - I was wondering if 1091 00:55:01,103 --> 00:55:02,872 you would reach out to them and get their blessing. 1092 00:55:02,972 --> 00:55:05,908 Oh, well, I don't... I-I don't, I don't, um... 1093 00:55:06,008 --> 00:55:07,678 You want to help the Murphys? 1094 00:55:07,777 --> 00:55:10,813 And all the other people who might need it, 1095 00:55:10,913 --> 00:55:12,349 like people like Connor. 1096 00:55:12,449 --> 00:55:14,351 Or... 1097 00:55:14,451 --> 00:55:15,818 people like us. 1098 00:55:15,918 --> 00:55:18,020 "People like us"? 1099 00:55:19,656 --> 00:55:22,593 Yes, right, because we have so much in common. 1100 00:55:22,693 --> 00:55:23,960 (chuckles): What? 1101 00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:26,363 Well, you're, like, the president 1102 00:55:26,463 --> 00:55:28,264 of a m-million different groups at school, 1103 00:55:28,365 --> 00:55:30,467 and you're, like, part of every single activity. 1104 00:55:30,567 --> 00:55:33,836 And you're, you know, and I'm... 1105 00:55:33,936 --> 00:55:35,972 um, I am not. 1106 00:55:36,939 --> 00:55:38,508 What do you take? 1107 00:55:42,412 --> 00:55:44,615 Okay, I'll go first. 1108 00:55:44,715 --> 00:55:46,916 I'm on Lexapro, ten milligrams. 1109 00:55:49,151 --> 00:55:50,520 Oh. 1110 00:55:52,021 --> 00:55:55,525 Well, I'm-I'm on Zoloft. 1111 00:55:55,626 --> 00:55:57,361 Uh, and Wellbutrin. 1112 00:55:59,396 --> 00:56:01,230 And, um... 1113 00:56:01,331 --> 00:56:03,132 Ativan as needed. 1114 00:56:03,899 --> 00:56:07,036 Depression? Anxiety? 1115 00:56:08,372 --> 00:56:09,772 Yeah. 1116 00:56:10,540 --> 00:56:12,775 Yeah, me, too. 1117 00:56:14,611 --> 00:56:16,546 Some days, it's just like, um... 1118 00:56:17,913 --> 00:56:19,650 It's like, um... 1119 00:56:19,750 --> 00:56:20,717 Impossible? 1120 00:56:20,816 --> 00:56:23,353 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1121 00:56:24,887 --> 00:56:27,557 You know, you don't really act like a... 1122 00:56:28,725 --> 00:56:30,293 ...depressed sort of person. 1123 00:56:30,394 --> 00:56:34,498 I'm just good at staying anonymous. 1124 00:56:36,700 --> 00:56:38,100 Same as you. 1125 00:56:40,570 --> 00:56:43,873 There are a lot of people who feel like us. 1126 00:56:43,973 --> 00:56:45,875 ♪ ♪ 1127 00:56:45,975 --> 00:56:48,545 People that you wouldn't think. 1128 00:56:52,081 --> 00:56:53,983 ♪ You ever look at all the people ♪ 1129 00:56:54,083 --> 00:56:58,020 ♪ Who seem to know exactly how to be? ♪ 1130 00:57:00,791 --> 00:57:04,695 ♪ You think, "They don't need piles of prescriptions ♪ 1131 00:57:04,795 --> 00:57:06,463 ♪ To function naturally" ♪ 1132 00:57:08,598 --> 00:57:11,834 ♪ Well, look again and you might catch it ♪ 1133 00:57:11,934 --> 00:57:14,303 ♪ Just stay a minute more ♪ 1134 00:57:15,572 --> 00:57:19,909 ♪ There's this little moment after the sunny smile ♪ 1135 00:57:20,009 --> 00:57:24,280 ♪ As their eyes fall to the floor ♪ 1136 00:57:24,381 --> 00:57:27,484 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 1137 00:57:27,584 --> 00:57:33,022 ♪ Who never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 1138 00:57:33,956 --> 00:57:37,159 ♪ All of those anonymous ones ♪ 1139 00:57:37,259 --> 00:57:42,164 ♪ Who never name that quiet pain they bury ♪ 1140 00:57:43,400 --> 00:57:46,202 ♪ So they keep on keeping secrets ♪ 1141 00:57:46,302 --> 00:57:49,004 ♪ That they think they have to hide ♪ 1142 00:57:49,105 --> 00:57:51,006 ♪ But what if everybody's secret ♪ 1143 00:57:51,107 --> 00:57:53,275 ♪ Is they have that secret side? ♪ 1144 00:57:53,377 --> 00:57:57,514 ♪ And to know they're somehow not alone ♪ 1145 00:57:57,614 --> 00:58:01,016 ♪ Well, that's all they're hoping for ♪ 1146 00:58:01,117 --> 00:58:03,620 ♪ What if they ♪ 1147 00:58:03,720 --> 00:58:06,556 ♪ Didn't have to stay ♪ 1148 00:58:07,691 --> 00:58:09,626 ♪ Anonymous anymore? ♪ 1149 00:58:10,594 --> 00:58:12,629 ♪ ♪ 1150 00:58:16,666 --> 00:58:20,337 ♪ Spot the girl who stays in motion ♪ 1151 00:58:20,437 --> 00:58:23,640 ♪ She spins so fast so she won't fall ♪ 1152 00:58:23,740 --> 00:58:26,843 ♪ She's built a wall with her achievements ♪ 1153 00:58:26,942 --> 00:58:28,645 ♪ To keep out the question ♪ 1154 00:58:28,745 --> 00:58:33,149 ♪ Without it, is she worth anything at all? ♪ 1155 00:58:33,249 --> 00:58:36,952 ♪ So nobody can know ♪ 1156 00:58:37,788 --> 00:58:42,091 ♪ Just what the cracks might show ♪ 1157 00:58:42,191 --> 00:58:48,365 ♪ How deep and dark they go ♪ 1158 00:58:48,465 --> 00:58:51,535 ♪ There are those anonymous ones ♪ 1159 00:58:51,635 --> 00:58:55,971 ♪ Stuck inside the perfect frame they're faking ♪ 1160 00:58:57,374 --> 00:59:00,276 ♪ All of us anonymous ones ♪ 1161 00:59:00,377 --> 00:59:05,415 ♪ Who pick themselves apart till they start breaking ♪ 1162 00:59:06,383 --> 00:59:08,885 ♪ And we keep on keeping secrets ♪ 1163 00:59:08,984 --> 00:59:11,053 ♪ That we think we have to hide ♪ 1164 00:59:11,153 --> 00:59:13,457 ♪ But what we really need is somebody ♪ 1165 00:59:13,557 --> 00:59:15,525 ♪ To see that secret side ♪ 1166 00:59:15,625 --> 00:59:19,195 ♪ And to know we're somehow not alone ♪ 1167 00:59:19,295 --> 00:59:22,097 ♪ Is all we're hoping for ♪ 1168 00:59:22,198 --> 00:59:26,302 ♪ And then we wouldn't have to be ♪ 1169 00:59:26,403 --> 00:59:28,505 ♪ Anonymous anymore ♪ 1170 00:59:29,673 --> 00:59:32,274 ♪ ♪ 1171 00:59:34,744 --> 00:59:36,847 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1172 00:59:36,947 --> 00:59:39,483 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1173 00:59:39,583 --> 00:59:41,818 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1174 00:59:41,918 --> 00:59:44,421 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1175 00:59:44,521 --> 00:59:47,256 ♪ The anonymous one ♪ 1176 00:59:47,357 --> 00:59:50,025 ♪ Noticed by none ♪ 1177 00:59:51,862 --> 00:59:53,530 Go, Bobcats! 1178 00:59:53,630 --> 00:59:57,266 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1179 00:59:57,367 --> 01:00:00,871 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy. ♪ 1180 01:00:00,971 --> 01:00:02,539 (song ends) 1181 01:00:06,610 --> 01:00:08,645 ♪ ♪ 1182 01:00:20,289 --> 01:00:21,725 CYNTHIA: "The Connor Project"? 1183 01:00:21,825 --> 01:00:23,192 Yeah, so it's a student group 1184 01:00:23,292 --> 01:00:26,329 dedicated to keeping Connor's memory alive. 1185 01:00:26,429 --> 01:00:28,798 Um, making sure people that need help, 1186 01:00:28,899 --> 01:00:30,333 they have somewhere they can go. 1187 01:00:30,433 --> 01:00:33,670 I didn't realize Connor meant this much to people. 1188 01:00:33,770 --> 01:00:35,939 Well, it's all... I mean, it was all Alana's idea. 1189 01:00:36,038 --> 01:00:37,106 She thought of the whole thing. 1190 01:00:37,206 --> 01:00:38,475 That's the young woman 1191 01:00:38,575 --> 01:00:40,777 who organized the memorial tomorrow. 1192 01:00:40,877 --> 01:00:43,212 - Mm-hmm. - Well, she seems like... 1193 01:00:43,313 --> 01:00:45,147 - quite a force. - Yeah. 1194 01:00:45,247 --> 01:00:47,450 Um, anyways, um... 1195 01:00:47,551 --> 01:00:49,319 we just wanted to do something. 1196 01:00:49,419 --> 01:00:52,422 It's-it's r-really cool. 1197 01:00:56,793 --> 01:00:59,094 There's something I want to show you. 1198 01:00:59,896 --> 01:01:01,163 Sure. 1199 01:01:03,198 --> 01:01:05,267 CYNTHIA: Oh, here we go. 1200 01:01:06,536 --> 01:01:08,638 It's a bit of a mess, I know. 1201 01:01:08,738 --> 01:01:13,777 We still haven't decided what to do with, um, everything. 1202 01:01:16,111 --> 01:01:19,482 Oh, um... he used to write songs. 1203 01:01:19,583 --> 01:01:21,183 Or at least he told us he did. 1204 01:01:21,283 --> 01:01:23,520 He refused to play for us, so who knows? 1205 01:01:24,854 --> 01:01:27,824 He never played any for you? 1206 01:01:28,825 --> 01:01:30,327 No, he di... he didn't. 1207 01:01:30,427 --> 01:01:32,662 He... No. I'm sorry. 1208 01:01:35,732 --> 01:01:36,833 CYNTHIA: Um... 1209 01:01:36,933 --> 01:01:39,168 (clothes hangers sliding) 1210 01:01:47,344 --> 01:01:49,278 Here it is. 1211 01:01:50,814 --> 01:01:53,083 It's a... (laughs) 1212 01:01:53,182 --> 01:01:56,151 When Connor entered seventh grade, 1213 01:01:56,251 --> 01:01:58,488 all of my girlfriends said, 1214 01:01:58,588 --> 01:02:00,457 "Here it comes, Bar Mitzvah season. 1215 01:02:00,557 --> 01:02:04,427 He's gonna have a different party every Saturday." 1216 01:02:04,527 --> 01:02:06,563 And Larry was so excited to take him shopping. 1217 01:02:06,663 --> 01:02:08,365 He dragged him to Brooks Brothers, 1218 01:02:08,465 --> 01:02:11,568 and they picked out a suit, some shirts and this tie. 1219 01:02:11,668 --> 01:02:16,339 He looked... just like his dad. 1220 01:02:21,411 --> 01:02:24,179 He never got invited to a single party. 1221 01:02:29,352 --> 01:02:33,188 He was such a sweet boy underneath it all. 1222 01:02:34,658 --> 01:02:37,827 Everything just hurt too much. 1223 01:02:40,664 --> 01:02:44,266 I thought that, uh, you could wear this to the memorial. 1224 01:02:44,367 --> 01:02:46,235 For your speech. 1225 01:02:48,071 --> 01:02:50,707 Oh, I'm not... I-I... 1226 01:02:50,807 --> 01:02:52,876 I wasn't... I'm-I'm not speaking. 1227 01:02:52,976 --> 01:02:54,411 Why not? 1228 01:02:54,511 --> 01:02:58,247 Well, I... I just don't think, um... 1229 01:03:00,249 --> 01:03:02,485 I mean, most people think that I'm... 1230 01:03:03,353 --> 01:03:04,621 ...not that cool of a person, 1231 01:03:04,721 --> 01:03:07,691 so nobody wants to hear from me. 1232 01:03:10,259 --> 01:03:12,495 Well, if... 1233 01:03:12,595 --> 01:03:15,799 that's what most people think... 1234 01:03:16,766 --> 01:03:19,335 ...it sounds like most people don't know you very well. 1235 01:03:19,436 --> 01:03:21,337 (Evan chuckles) 1236 01:03:21,438 --> 01:03:23,406 They didn't know Connor either. 1237 01:03:24,441 --> 01:03:26,710 They never bothered. 1238 01:03:26,810 --> 01:03:28,378 Hmm. 1239 01:03:30,847 --> 01:03:33,282 You can tell them what they missed. 1240 01:03:40,523 --> 01:03:42,492 You're so handsome. 1241 01:03:43,258 --> 01:03:45,495 ♪ ♪ 1242 01:03:56,305 --> 01:03:59,209 (crowd chattering) 1243 01:03:59,309 --> 01:04:01,211 (chatter continues) 1244 01:04:01,311 --> 01:04:03,546 ♪ ♪ 1245 01:04:10,453 --> 01:04:12,388 (breath trembles) 1246 01:04:15,391 --> 01:04:17,327 (sighs heavily) 1247 01:04:18,828 --> 01:04:22,264 I'm so glad you changed your mind. 1248 01:04:27,070 --> 01:04:29,304 (chatter quiets) 1249 01:04:32,575 --> 01:04:37,180 Today is a day of remembrance and reflection. 1250 01:04:37,279 --> 01:04:39,048 It sucks he isn't here to see this. 1251 01:04:39,149 --> 01:04:41,283 The first person we'll hear from this morning 1252 01:04:41,384 --> 01:04:43,686 is Evan Hansen. 1253 01:04:48,324 --> 01:04:50,326 (person coughing) 1254 01:04:56,533 --> 01:04:59,402 (breath trembles) 1255 01:05:01,303 --> 01:05:03,540 - Uh, good morning, s... - (feedback squeals loudly) 1256 01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:06,309 - (crowd murmuring) - STUDENT: Holy shit. 1257 01:05:08,378 --> 01:05:09,913 Sorry. 1258 01:05:10,013 --> 01:05:11,748 (clears throat) Sorry. 1259 01:05:13,917 --> 01:05:17,187 (sighs) Good morning, students and faculty. 1260 01:05:17,287 --> 01:05:20,757 I would like to say a few words to you today... 1261 01:05:20,857 --> 01:05:22,559 (breathes deeply) 1262 01:05:22,659 --> 01:05:24,460 ...about my friend... 1263 01:05:25,829 --> 01:05:29,265 (voice cracking): ...my best friend, Connor Murphy. 1264 01:05:29,365 --> 01:05:30,466 Holy shit. 1265 01:05:30,567 --> 01:05:32,001 (Evan breathes deeply) 1266 01:05:32,101 --> 01:05:33,970 I would like to tell you about the day that Connor and I 1267 01:05:34,070 --> 01:05:37,574 went hiking behind the old Autumn Smile Apple Orchard. 1268 01:05:37,674 --> 01:05:40,109 We found a huge oak tree. 1269 01:05:40,210 --> 01:05:42,245 Connor said that he wondered what the world would look like 1270 01:05:42,345 --> 01:05:46,583 from all the way up there, so we decided to find out. 1271 01:05:47,550 --> 01:05:49,452 (breathes deeply) 1272 01:05:49,552 --> 01:05:51,754 We started climbing slowly. (sniffles) 1273 01:05:51,855 --> 01:05:53,723 And then, when I finally looked back, 1274 01:05:53,823 --> 01:05:55,658 we were already 30 feet off the ground. 1275 01:05:55,758 --> 01:05:57,994 Um, Connor just looked at me... 1276 01:05:59,662 --> 01:06:02,165 ...and smiled that way he always did. 1277 01:06:02,265 --> 01:06:04,567 Um, and then... 1278 01:06:11,608 --> 01:06:13,409 (Evan breathes deeply) 1279 01:06:13,509 --> 01:06:15,078 Um... 1280 01:06:16,179 --> 01:06:17,513 Sorry. Then I fell. 1281 01:06:17,614 --> 01:06:19,682 I-I lay there on the ground and... 1282 01:06:19,782 --> 01:06:23,219 Good morning, students and f-f... faculty. 1283 01:06:23,320 --> 01:06:25,322 (crowd murmuring) 1284 01:06:25,421 --> 01:06:27,624 Sorry, that... (chuckles) 1285 01:06:27,724 --> 01:06:29,125 Sorry, that's the wrong... 1286 01:06:30,126 --> 01:06:31,227 (feedback squeals loudly) 1287 01:06:31,328 --> 01:06:33,563 (crowd murmuring, laughing) 1288 01:06:51,748 --> 01:06:53,983 (murmuring quiets) 1289 01:06:57,720 --> 01:06:59,956 (breath trembling) 1290 01:07:12,268 --> 01:07:14,504 ♪ ♪ 1291 01:07:19,575 --> 01:07:21,511 (sighs) 1292 01:07:26,950 --> 01:07:31,721 ♪ Have you ever felt like nobody was there? ♪ 1293 01:07:33,623 --> 01:07:40,096 ♪ Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere? ♪ 1294 01:07:41,064 --> 01:07:45,101 ♪ Have you ever felt like you could disappear? ♪ 1295 01:07:46,836 --> 01:07:48,738 ♪ Like you could fall ♪ 1296 01:07:49,806 --> 01:07:52,108 ♪ And no one would hear ♪ 1297 01:07:54,610 --> 01:07:57,914 But, see, the thing is, when I looked up, Connor was there. 1298 01:08:00,016 --> 01:08:02,218 That's the gift he gave me. 1299 01:08:03,019 --> 01:08:05,054 To show me th-that I wasn't alone. 1300 01:08:05,154 --> 01:08:06,323 Um, nobody is. 1301 01:08:06,423 --> 01:08:09,592 That's-that's the gift that he gave all of us. 1302 01:08:09,692 --> 01:08:11,928 I just wish... 1303 01:08:13,696 --> 01:08:15,631 I wish we could've given that to him. 1304 01:08:18,435 --> 01:08:19,669 So... 1305 01:08:19,769 --> 01:08:24,140 ♪ Let that lonely feeling wash away ♪ 1306 01:08:25,476 --> 01:08:31,214 ♪ Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay ♪ 1307 01:08:31,315 --> 01:08:36,753 ♪ 'Cause when you don't feel strong enough to stand ♪ 1308 01:08:36,853 --> 01:08:42,759 ♪ You can reach, reach out your hand ♪ 1309 01:08:43,860 --> 01:08:49,198 ♪ And, oh, someone will come running ♪ 1310 01:08:49,298 --> 01:08:55,204 ♪ And I know they'll take you home ♪ 1311 01:08:57,840 --> 01:09:00,943 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1312 01:09:01,044 --> 01:09:04,180 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 1313 01:09:04,280 --> 01:09:08,385 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 1314 01:09:08,485 --> 01:09:10,920 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1315 01:09:11,020 --> 01:09:13,457 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 1316 01:09:13,556 --> 01:09:16,893 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 1317 01:09:16,993 --> 01:09:19,929 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 1318 01:09:20,930 --> 01:09:25,868 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1319 01:09:26,636 --> 01:09:31,174 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1320 01:09:31,941 --> 01:09:36,712 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1321 01:09:37,481 --> 01:09:42,218 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1322 01:09:42,985 --> 01:09:45,288 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1323 01:09:45,389 --> 01:09:47,023 ♪ ♪ 1324 01:09:47,123 --> 01:09:48,925 (sighs) 1325 01:09:56,032 --> 01:09:57,633 ALANA: Have you seen this? 1326 01:09:57,733 --> 01:09:59,068 JARED: People started sharing it, 1327 01:09:59,168 --> 01:10:00,903 and now, I mean, it's everywhere. 1328 01:10:01,003 --> 01:10:02,705 This morning, it only had, like, 30 views. 1329 01:10:02,805 --> 01:10:04,408 Well, how many does it have now? 1330 01:10:04,508 --> 01:10:06,609 723. 1331 01:10:06,709 --> 01:10:09,679 2,326 views. 1332 01:10:09,779 --> 01:10:12,148 14,359. 1333 01:10:12,248 --> 01:10:15,319 I don't understand what happened. 1334 01:10:15,419 --> 01:10:16,986 You did. 1335 01:10:18,654 --> 01:10:22,291 ♪ There's a place where we don't have to feel unknown ♪ 1336 01:10:22,392 --> 01:10:23,427 Oh, my God. 1337 01:10:23,527 --> 01:10:24,827 Everybody needs to see this. 1338 01:10:24,927 --> 01:10:26,829 ♪ And every time that you call out ♪ 1339 01:10:26,929 --> 01:10:28,865 ♪ You're a little less alone ♪ 1340 01:10:28,965 --> 01:10:30,800 - I can't stop watching this video. - ...17 years old. 1341 01:10:30,900 --> 01:10:32,969 ♪ If you only say the word ♪ 1342 01:10:33,069 --> 01:10:34,637 - Take five minutes. - It'll make your day. 1343 01:10:34,737 --> 01:10:40,511 ♪ From across the silence, your voice is heard ♪ 1344 01:10:40,611 --> 01:10:41,777 ♪ Oh ♪ 1345 01:10:41,878 --> 01:10:43,212 PERSON: Share it with the people you love. 1346 01:10:43,313 --> 01:10:45,482 - GIRL: Repost. - The world needs to hear this. 1347 01:10:45,582 --> 01:10:46,983 Beautiful tribute. 1348 01:10:47,083 --> 01:10:49,085 I know someone who really needed to hear this today. 1349 01:10:49,185 --> 01:10:51,821 So thank you, Evan Hansen, for doing what you're doing. 1350 01:10:51,921 --> 01:10:54,824 I never met you, Connor, but coming on here, 1351 01:10:54,924 --> 01:10:56,125 reading everyone's posts... 1352 01:10:56,225 --> 01:10:58,161 Evan is exactly right. We are not alone. 1353 01:10:58,261 --> 01:10:59,596 We are not alone. 1354 01:10:59,695 --> 01:11:00,763 None of us. 1355 01:11:00,863 --> 01:11:01,898 None of us are alone. 1356 01:11:01,998 --> 01:11:03,567 - Like. - Forward. - Especially now, 1357 01:11:03,699 --> 01:11:04,967 with everything you hear on the news. 1358 01:11:05,067 --> 01:11:06,503 - Like. - Share. - Repost. - Forward. 1359 01:11:06,603 --> 01:11:07,904 Thank you, Evan Hansen, 1360 01:11:08,004 --> 01:11:09,406 for giving us a space to remember Connor. 1361 01:11:09,506 --> 01:11:11,073 - Thanks to Evan. - To be together. 1362 01:11:11,174 --> 01:11:12,041 - Thanks for helping my mom. - Thank you for helping my mom. 1363 01:11:12,141 --> 01:11:13,443 Thank you, Evan Hansen. 1364 01:11:13,544 --> 01:11:14,710 - ♪ To take you home... ♪ - Vermont. - Tampa. 1365 01:11:14,810 --> 01:11:16,078 - Sacramento. - Michigan. 1366 01:11:16,179 --> 01:11:17,246 - ♪ Someone will come... ♪ - Just reach out. 1367 01:11:17,347 --> 01:11:18,415 Thank you, Evan. 1368 01:11:18,515 --> 01:11:19,749 This is about community and friendship. 1369 01:11:19,849 --> 01:11:20,716 - Thank you, Evan. - Thank you. 1370 01:11:20,816 --> 01:11:21,751 (voices overlapping) 1371 01:11:21,851 --> 01:11:23,252 Thank you, Evan Hansen. 1372 01:11:23,353 --> 01:11:26,456 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1373 01:11:26,557 --> 01:11:29,825 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 1374 01:11:29,926 --> 01:11:32,862 ♪ When you're broken on the ground ♪ 1375 01:11:32,962 --> 01:11:35,097 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1376 01:11:35,198 --> 01:11:37,401 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 1377 01:11:37,501 --> 01:11:40,803 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 1378 01:11:40,903 --> 01:11:43,873 ♪ If you only look around ♪ 1379 01:11:43,973 --> 01:11:49,413 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 1380 01:11:49,513 --> 01:11:50,947 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1381 01:11:51,047 --> 01:11:56,152 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 1382 01:11:56,252 --> 01:12:01,057 ♪ Out of the shadows, the morning is breaking ♪ 1383 01:12:01,157 --> 01:12:04,528 ♪ And all is new ♪ 1384 01:12:04,628 --> 01:12:07,230 ♪ All is new ♪ 1385 01:12:07,331 --> 01:12:10,400 ♪ It's filling up the empty ♪ 1386 01:12:10,500 --> 01:12:12,902 ♪ And suddenly I see ♪ 1387 01:12:13,002 --> 01:12:14,937 ♪ That all is new ♪ 1388 01:12:15,037 --> 01:12:18,074 ♪ All is new ♪ 1389 01:12:18,174 --> 01:12:22,912 ♪ You are not alone, you are not alone ♪ 1390 01:12:23,012 --> 01:12:26,115 ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1391 01:12:26,215 --> 01:12:30,454 ♪ You are not alone, you are not alone ♪ 1392 01:12:30,554 --> 01:12:32,623 - ♪ You are not alone ♪ - ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1393 01:12:32,723 --> 01:12:33,889 ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1394 01:12:33,990 --> 01:12:35,592 ♪ You are not ♪ 1395 01:12:35,692 --> 01:12:40,062 - ♪ You are not alone ♪ - ♪ You are not alone ♪ 1396 01:12:40,162 --> 01:12:42,865 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1397 01:12:42,965 --> 01:12:45,968 ♪ When you need someone to carry you ♪ 1398 01:12:46,068 --> 01:12:48,871 ♪ When you're broken on the ground ♪ 1399 01:12:48,971 --> 01:12:51,173 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1400 01:12:51,274 --> 01:12:53,543 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 1401 01:12:53,644 --> 01:12:56,812 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 1402 01:12:56,912 --> 01:13:00,016 ♪ If you only look around ♪ 1403 01:13:00,116 --> 01:13:02,184 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1404 01:13:02,285 --> 01:13:05,988 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 1405 01:13:06,088 --> 01:13:07,491 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1406 01:13:07,591 --> 01:13:10,627 ♪ When you need someone to carry you ♪ 1407 01:13:10,727 --> 01:13:15,432 ♪ You will be found ♪ 1408 01:13:16,198 --> 01:13:20,303 ♪ You will be found. ♪ 1409 01:13:20,404 --> 01:13:21,505 (song ends) 1410 01:13:24,273 --> 01:13:25,442 ♪ ♪ 1411 01:13:25,542 --> 01:13:26,677 (sniffles) 1412 01:13:26,777 --> 01:13:28,578 (chuckles, sniffles) 1413 01:13:29,546 --> 01:13:30,813 Hey. 1414 01:13:30,913 --> 01:13:32,848 What's wrong? 1415 01:13:34,950 --> 01:13:37,521 Everything you said in your speech. 1416 01:13:37,621 --> 01:13:40,089 Everything you've done. 1417 01:13:40,189 --> 01:13:42,858 You don't know how much... 1418 01:13:42,958 --> 01:13:45,762 you've given all of us. 1419 01:13:45,861 --> 01:13:47,196 My family. 1420 01:13:47,296 --> 01:13:48,831 Me. 1421 01:13:48,931 --> 01:13:50,567 No. 1422 01:13:50,667 --> 01:13:52,168 No, I... 1423 01:13:52,268 --> 01:13:55,304 You've given me my brother back. 1424 01:14:03,413 --> 01:14:04,980 (exhales sharply) 1425 01:14:06,416 --> 01:14:08,452 ♪ ♪ 1426 01:14:15,692 --> 01:14:17,494 (cast saw buzzing) 1427 01:14:28,372 --> 01:14:30,407 ♪ ♪ 1428 01:14:33,677 --> 01:14:35,579 (sighs) 1429 01:14:43,820 --> 01:14:45,988 ALANA: Welcome to the first official meeting 1430 01:14:46,088 --> 01:14:47,791 of The Connor Project. 1431 01:14:47,890 --> 01:14:50,660 (cheering) 1432 01:14:52,061 --> 01:14:53,597 Right? 1433 01:14:54,331 --> 01:14:58,167 Um, now, as you all know from Evan's speech, 1434 01:14:58,267 --> 01:15:00,871 uh, Connor's favorite place in the entire world 1435 01:15:00,970 --> 01:15:02,873 was the Autumn Smile Apple Orchard. 1436 01:15:02,972 --> 01:15:05,542 I am beyond excited to announce that, 1437 01:15:05,642 --> 01:15:07,910 in addition to our support groups, we will be launching 1438 01:15:08,010 --> 01:15:13,182 a Kickstarter campaign to raise $100,000 to reopen and redesign 1439 01:15:13,282 --> 01:15:16,453 Autumn Smile as the Connor Murphy Memorial Orchard. 1440 01:15:16,553 --> 01:15:18,822 (applause) 1441 01:15:18,921 --> 01:15:22,793 Um, so to explain what we're going to be asking of you, 1442 01:15:22,893 --> 01:15:24,193 I'm gonna turn things over 1443 01:15:24,293 --> 01:15:27,531 to our director of global communications. 1444 01:15:27,631 --> 01:15:29,231 Thanks, Alana. 1445 01:15:29,332 --> 01:15:30,600 So great. 1446 01:15:30,700 --> 01:15:32,935 Our new website is now live. 1447 01:15:33,035 --> 01:15:34,871 If you have not yet read 1448 01:15:34,970 --> 01:15:37,774 the emails between Evan and Connor... 1449 01:15:37,874 --> 01:15:41,010 oh, you're gonna want to grab some tissues. 1450 01:15:42,011 --> 01:15:44,314 (vomiting) 1451 01:15:44,414 --> 01:15:48,785 LARRY: I swear, I've got a Cal Ripken here somewhere. 1452 01:15:48,885 --> 01:15:51,187 Look at that, hmm? 1453 01:15:51,987 --> 01:15:54,023 The entire '96 team. 1454 01:15:54,123 --> 01:15:55,425 There's three Hall of Famers on there. 1455 01:15:55,525 --> 01:15:57,092 - Wow. - You get the right people, 1456 01:15:57,193 --> 01:15:59,496 baseball fans, uh, you could raise 1457 01:15:59,596 --> 01:16:01,898 at least a few hundred bucks for the orchard, 1458 01:16:01,997 --> 01:16:03,533 maybe a couple thousand. 1459 01:16:03,633 --> 01:16:05,335 Yeah, but... 1460 01:16:05,435 --> 01:16:08,805 I mean, you should, you should probably keep all this stuff. 1461 01:16:08,905 --> 01:16:12,141 Oh, uh, it's just gonna sit here gathering dust. 1462 01:16:15,044 --> 01:16:17,046 Uh, stiff as a board, isn't it? 1463 01:16:17,146 --> 01:16:18,981 Yeah. 1464 01:16:19,081 --> 01:16:20,350 Well, it's never been used. 1465 01:16:20,450 --> 01:16:21,751 Connor... 1466 01:16:22,919 --> 01:16:24,921 ...he loved baseball. 1467 01:16:25,020 --> 01:16:27,256 When he was little. 1468 01:16:27,357 --> 01:16:29,392 First time I met him, uh... 1469 01:16:29,493 --> 01:16:31,595 Cynthia wasn't sure how the kids would react, all right? 1470 01:16:31,695 --> 01:16:32,863 She was terrified. 1471 01:16:32,963 --> 01:16:35,799 And I was terrified. 1472 01:16:35,899 --> 01:16:37,801 I mean... 1473 01:16:37,901 --> 01:16:39,636 five minutes in... 1474 01:16:41,404 --> 01:16:45,408 (voice breaking): Connor's, like, pulling my arm, uh... 1475 01:16:46,343 --> 01:16:48,778 "Come on, let's go play catch." 1476 01:16:50,413 --> 01:16:52,147 He... 1477 01:16:53,583 --> 01:16:54,885 (Larry sighs) 1478 01:16:55,685 --> 01:16:58,254 I bought that... I don't know... two years ago. 1479 01:16:58,355 --> 01:17:01,658 I thought, you know, maybe we could... 1480 01:17:08,264 --> 01:17:09,432 So stupid. 1481 01:17:09,533 --> 01:17:13,370 He was really lucky to have a step... 1482 01:17:15,438 --> 01:17:17,541 ...to have a dad like you. 1483 01:17:19,275 --> 01:17:23,112 Your dad must feel pretty lucky to... 1484 01:17:24,146 --> 01:17:26,115 ...have a son like you. 1485 01:17:28,852 --> 01:17:30,720 Yeah, he does. 1486 01:17:30,820 --> 01:17:33,023 (sighs softly) 1487 01:17:33,122 --> 01:17:35,358 ♪ ♪ 1488 01:17:37,894 --> 01:17:39,796 (camera clicks) 1489 01:17:47,904 --> 01:17:50,272 ♪ ♪ 1490 01:17:51,474 --> 01:17:53,075 (text message chirps) 1491 01:18:04,888 --> 01:18:06,323 (phone chimes) 1492 01:18:06,423 --> 01:18:09,426 You know, I-I saw the strangest thing 1493 01:18:09,526 --> 01:18:11,695 - on-on Facebook yesterday. - Really? 1494 01:18:11,795 --> 01:18:16,700 Um, somebody had a video of you doing a speech. 1495 01:18:17,500 --> 01:18:21,871 About that boy, Connor Murphy. 1496 01:18:21,972 --> 01:18:25,809 How the two of you climbed a tree together 1497 01:18:25,909 --> 01:18:27,677 at an orchard. 1498 01:18:29,244 --> 01:18:31,781 You told me that you didn't know him, but in the speech, 1499 01:18:31,881 --> 01:18:33,850 you said that he was your best friend. 1500 01:18:33,950 --> 01:18:35,250 Right, well... 1501 01:18:36,251 --> 01:18:37,821 ...'cause that wasn't true. 1502 01:18:37,921 --> 01:18:39,322 Um... 1503 01:18:42,124 --> 01:18:43,727 When I said I didn't know him. 1504 01:18:43,827 --> 01:18:45,260 Mm. 1505 01:18:45,362 --> 01:18:48,798 I thought that you broke your arm at-at work. 1506 01:18:48,898 --> 01:18:51,300 Okay, well, who do you think drove me to urgent care 1507 01:18:51,401 --> 01:18:53,003 and-and waited there with me? 1508 01:18:53,103 --> 01:18:54,704 You were at work. You remember? 1509 01:18:54,804 --> 01:18:56,205 I couldn't even... You didn't, you didn't answer your phone. 1510 01:18:56,305 --> 01:18:57,974 You-you told me that your boss took you. 1511 01:18:58,074 --> 01:18:59,476 Well, so I lied, obviously. 1512 01:18:59,576 --> 01:19:01,978 So when were you planning on telling me any of this? 1513 01:19:02,078 --> 01:19:03,913 When would I tell you exactly? When are you even here? 1514 01:19:04,014 --> 01:19:06,483 - I'm here now. - Okay. 1515 01:19:07,550 --> 01:19:10,553 You know, I-I-I talked to Dr. Sherman, and he told me 1516 01:19:10,654 --> 01:19:12,154 - you've been skipping appointments. - I missed one. 1517 01:19:12,254 --> 01:19:14,424 You know those aren't free. 1518 01:19:19,796 --> 01:19:21,931 Sorry. I'm sorry. 1519 01:19:22,932 --> 01:19:25,200 I'm... 1520 01:19:25,300 --> 01:19:26,636 (sighs) 1521 01:19:26,736 --> 01:19:29,706 I'm so happy you had a friend, sweetheart. 1522 01:19:31,107 --> 01:19:32,842 I'm sorry he's gone. 1523 01:19:32,942 --> 01:19:34,844 I just wish I'd known. 1524 01:19:38,648 --> 01:19:40,884 That speech you gave, it... 1525 01:19:43,353 --> 01:19:45,755 I don't even know what to say. I'm... 1526 01:19:47,090 --> 01:19:48,958 I'm proud of you. 1527 01:19:51,895 --> 01:19:53,163 Thanks. 1528 01:19:53,262 --> 01:19:55,498 (crickets chirping) 1529 01:19:56,366 --> 01:19:58,601 (doorbell rings) 1530 01:20:07,242 --> 01:20:08,678 (sighs) 1531 01:20:08,778 --> 01:20:09,813 Hi. 1532 01:20:11,481 --> 01:20:13,383 This is a cool surprise. 1533 01:20:13,483 --> 01:20:15,284 (door closes) 1534 01:20:15,385 --> 01:20:17,219 Um... 1535 01:20:17,320 --> 01:20:19,322 Can I get you anything or...? 1536 01:20:19,422 --> 01:20:21,157 Just water. 1537 01:20:21,958 --> 01:20:24,728 - Just water? You're sure? - Yeah. That's perfect. 1538 01:20:25,729 --> 01:20:26,796 Coming up. 1539 01:20:27,797 --> 01:20:29,766 (glass clinks) 1540 01:20:29,866 --> 01:20:31,134 (water running) 1541 01:20:31,233 --> 01:20:32,335 ZOE: Where's your mom? 1542 01:20:32,435 --> 01:20:35,205 She works late on Fridays. 1543 01:20:35,304 --> 01:20:37,440 Oh. I wanted to meet her. 1544 01:20:37,540 --> 01:20:40,310 Yeah, that would've been great. 1545 01:20:43,847 --> 01:20:45,014 What's this? 1546 01:20:45,115 --> 01:20:46,716 Oh, it's just my mom is obsessed 1547 01:20:46,816 --> 01:20:48,818 with these college scholarship essay contests. 1548 01:20:48,918 --> 01:20:51,187 I mean, I'd-I'd-I'd have to win probably, like, all of them 1549 01:20:51,286 --> 01:20:55,290 to actually pay for college, so... 1550 01:20:56,626 --> 01:20:58,828 Your parents, they-they can't...? 1551 01:20:58,928 --> 01:21:00,897 Uh, not really. 1552 01:21:02,297 --> 01:21:03,700 I'm sorry. 1553 01:21:12,375 --> 01:21:14,677 Is your room upstairs? 1554 01:21:19,149 --> 01:21:20,917 Yeah. It's, um... 1555 01:21:23,386 --> 01:21:24,788 (sighs) Yeah. 1556 01:21:32,061 --> 01:21:34,864 Yeah, so it's, like, a pretty standard sort of room, I guess. 1557 01:21:34,964 --> 01:21:36,199 So... 1558 01:21:36,298 --> 01:21:37,934 Hey. Oh, um... 1559 01:21:38,034 --> 01:21:39,803 actually, I meant to tell you this before. 1560 01:21:39,903 --> 01:21:42,705 Um, so Alana and I had a really good... 1561 01:21:43,840 --> 01:21:46,509 Um, we had a really good meeting this morning, 1562 01:21:46,609 --> 01:21:48,611 and I think that... y-you probably noticed, 1563 01:21:48,711 --> 01:21:51,281 um, that, uh, you know, a lot of people were giving, 1564 01:21:51,381 --> 01:21:54,083 uh, during that first week, which is definitely great, 1565 01:21:54,184 --> 01:21:56,653 but, um, it sort of slowed down a bit, obviously. 1566 01:21:56,753 --> 01:21:57,954 But Alana and I are really confident 1567 01:21:58,054 --> 01:21:59,489 that it's gonna pick right back up. 1568 01:21:59,589 --> 01:22:01,991 I think it's just a m... a matter of... 1569 01:22:02,792 --> 01:22:05,461 Can I talk to you about something? 1570 01:22:08,965 --> 01:22:10,533 Yes. 1571 01:22:14,604 --> 01:22:16,372 (sighs) Uh... 1572 01:22:16,472 --> 01:22:18,775 The Connor Project is... awesome. 1573 01:22:18,875 --> 01:22:21,878 It's-it's really, really cool. 1574 01:22:21,978 --> 01:22:23,179 Oh. 1575 01:22:24,113 --> 01:22:26,583 - Thank you. - It's just that, my whole life, 1576 01:22:26,683 --> 01:22:28,284 everything has been about him. 1577 01:22:28,384 --> 01:22:31,988 And maybe the two of us... 1578 01:22:33,156 --> 01:22:35,959 ...maybe we don't have to talk about my brother all the time. 1579 01:22:36,059 --> 01:22:38,228 Maybe we can... 1580 01:22:38,329 --> 01:22:41,831 talk about other things. 1581 01:22:49,906 --> 01:22:51,207 I like you. 1582 01:22:51,307 --> 01:22:53,376 (Zoe chuckles softly) 1583 01:22:53,476 --> 01:22:57,380 And it's not because you were friends with my brother 1584 01:22:57,480 --> 01:22:59,382 or because of The Connor Project. 1585 01:22:59,482 --> 01:23:02,151 ♪ ♪ 1586 01:23:02,252 --> 01:23:04,721 I like you 'cause... 1587 01:23:04,821 --> 01:23:06,723 (chuckles): you. 1588 01:23:06,823 --> 01:23:11,427 ♪ I don't need you to sell me on reasons to want you ♪ 1589 01:23:13,496 --> 01:23:17,967 ♪ I don't need you to search for the proof that I should ♪ 1590 01:23:20,570 --> 01:23:24,040 ♪ You don't have to convince me ♪ 1591 01:23:24,140 --> 01:23:27,977 ♪ You don't have to be scared you're not enough ♪ 1592 01:23:28,077 --> 01:23:30,980 ♪ 'Cause what we've got going ♪ 1593 01:23:31,080 --> 01:23:33,449 (chuckles): ♪ Is good ♪ 1594 01:23:34,250 --> 01:23:38,922 ♪ I don't need more reminders of all that's been broken ♪ 1595 01:23:41,057 --> 01:23:46,062 ♪ I don't need you to fix what I'd rather forget ♪ 1596 01:23:47,630 --> 01:23:51,200 ♪ Clear the slate and start over ♪ 1597 01:23:51,301 --> 01:23:55,872 ♪ Try to quiet the noises in your head ♪ 1598 01:23:55,972 --> 01:23:59,208 ♪ We can't compete with all that ♪ 1599 01:24:01,678 --> 01:24:03,746 ♪ So what if it's us? ♪ 1600 01:24:03,846 --> 01:24:08,419 ♪ What if it's us and only us ♪ 1601 01:24:08,518 --> 01:24:13,656 ♪ And what came before won't count anymore or matter? ♪ 1602 01:24:13,756 --> 01:24:15,858 ♪ Can we try that? ♪ 1603 01:24:15,959 --> 01:24:19,162 ♪ What if it's you, what if it's me ♪ 1604 01:24:19,262 --> 01:24:23,132 ♪ And what if that's all that we need it to be ♪ 1605 01:24:23,232 --> 01:24:26,903 ♪ And the rest of the world falls away? ♪ 1606 01:24:27,837 --> 01:24:28,972 ♪ What do you say? ♪ 1607 01:24:29,072 --> 01:24:30,807 ♪ I never thought there'd be ♪ 1608 01:24:30,907 --> 01:24:33,943 ♪ Someone like you who would want me ♪ 1609 01:24:34,043 --> 01:24:35,011 Well... 1610 01:24:35,111 --> 01:24:38,415 ♪ So I give you 10,000 reasons ♪ 1611 01:24:38,514 --> 01:24:40,750 ♪ To not let me go ♪ 1612 01:24:42,852 --> 01:24:46,889 ♪ But if you really see me ♪ 1613 01:24:46,990 --> 01:24:51,160 ♪ If you like me for me and nothing else ♪ 1614 01:24:51,260 --> 01:24:53,029 ♪ Well, that's all that I've wanted ♪ 1615 01:24:53,129 --> 01:24:57,401 ♪ For longer than you could possibly know ♪ 1616 01:24:57,500 --> 01:24:59,403 ♪ So it can be us ♪ 1617 01:24:59,535 --> 01:25:04,207 ♪ It can be us and only us ♪ 1618 01:25:04,307 --> 01:25:09,480 ♪ And what came before won't count anymore or matter ♪ 1619 01:25:09,579 --> 01:25:11,247 ♪ We can try that ♪ 1620 01:25:11,348 --> 01:25:15,051 (harmonizing): ♪ It's not so impossible ♪ 1621 01:25:15,151 --> 01:25:17,920 ♪ Nobody else but the two of us here ♪ 1622 01:25:18,021 --> 01:25:21,891 ♪ 'Cause you're saying it's possible ♪ 1623 01:25:21,991 --> 01:25:25,396 ♪ We can just watch the whole world disappear ♪ 1624 01:25:25,496 --> 01:25:30,700 ♪ Till you're the only one ♪ 1625 01:25:30,800 --> 01:25:37,740 ♪ I still know how to see ♪ 1626 01:25:40,877 --> 01:25:42,578 EVAN: ♪ It's just you and me ♪ 1627 01:25:42,678 --> 01:25:44,914 ZOE: ♪ It'll be us ♪ 1628 01:25:45,014 --> 01:25:49,919 ♪ It'll be us and only us ♪ 1629 01:25:50,019 --> 01:25:54,690 ♪ And what came before won't count anymore ♪ 1630 01:25:54,791 --> 01:25:57,394 (harmonizing): ♪ We can try that ♪ 1631 01:25:57,494 --> 01:26:00,897 ♪ You and me ♪ 1632 01:26:00,997 --> 01:26:04,133 ♪ That's all that we need it to be ♪ 1633 01:26:04,233 --> 01:26:07,770 ♪ And the rest of the world falls away ♪ 1634 01:26:07,870 --> 01:26:14,077 ♪ And the rest of the world falls away ♪ 1635 01:26:15,878 --> 01:26:18,781 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1636 01:26:19,715 --> 01:26:22,919 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1637 01:26:28,758 --> 01:26:30,993 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1638 01:26:32,061 --> 01:26:35,064 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1639 01:26:35,865 --> 01:26:38,868 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1640 01:26:39,802 --> 01:26:42,905 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1641 01:26:50,481 --> 01:26:51,814 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1642 01:26:51,914 --> 01:26:53,916 All right, let's just start without him. 1643 01:26:54,016 --> 01:26:57,687 ♪ The world falls away ♪ 1644 01:26:57,787 --> 01:27:03,860 ♪ And it's only us. ♪ 1645 01:27:12,135 --> 01:27:14,237 (song ends) 1646 01:27:14,338 --> 01:27:15,738 (crickets chirping) 1647 01:27:15,838 --> 01:27:17,673 (car alarm honks twice) 1648 01:27:18,641 --> 01:27:19,942 (both laughing) 1649 01:27:20,042 --> 01:27:20,743 No. 1650 01:27:20,843 --> 01:27:22,044 I'm famous for doing that. 1651 01:27:22,145 --> 01:27:23,347 CYNTHIA: I've been told that many times. 1652 01:27:23,447 --> 01:27:24,348 HEIDI: Mm-hmm. 1653 01:27:24,448 --> 01:27:25,349 Hi, honey. 1654 01:27:25,449 --> 01:27:26,716 CYNTHIA: Come join us. 1655 01:27:26,816 --> 01:27:29,218 - I just put dinner in the oven. - Hi. 1656 01:27:30,253 --> 01:27:31,254 (laughs) 1657 01:27:31,355 --> 01:27:32,788 She made me swear to keep it a surprise. 1658 01:27:32,889 --> 01:27:34,290 - I'm surprised. - (laughs) 1659 01:27:34,391 --> 01:27:35,526 Hi. 1660 01:27:35,626 --> 01:27:37,226 It's so nice to finally meet you. 1661 01:27:37,327 --> 01:27:38,694 - Oh, hi. - Hi. 1662 01:27:38,794 --> 01:27:40,430 Yeah, uh, great. 1663 01:27:40,531 --> 01:27:42,432 - It's great. - (chuckles) 1664 01:27:42,533 --> 01:27:44,167 Come on, Evan. Sit. 1665 01:27:45,968 --> 01:27:47,904 I-I thought that you were working tonight. 1666 01:27:48,004 --> 01:27:50,072 HEIDI: Cynthia called and invited me for dinner, 1667 01:27:50,173 --> 01:27:51,974 so, you know, I'm playing hooky. 1668 01:27:52,074 --> 01:27:54,177 We were just discussing how sneaky you and Connor were. 1669 01:27:54,277 --> 01:27:56,879 HEIDI: I had no idea that he and Connor were even friends. 1670 01:27:56,979 --> 01:27:58,281 LARRY: Oh, we were the same. 1671 01:27:58,382 --> 01:27:59,916 CYNTHIA: You know, boys love their secrets. 1672 01:28:00,016 --> 01:28:01,918 Something smells good. What's for dinner? 1673 01:28:02,018 --> 01:28:03,786 Oh, it's chicken Milanese, your favorite. 1674 01:28:03,886 --> 01:28:05,755 Oh, actually his favorite is 1675 01:28:05,855 --> 01:28:07,256 my great-grandmother's black beans. 1676 01:28:07,357 --> 01:28:08,224 Really? 1677 01:28:08,325 --> 01:28:09,692 CYNTHIA: Well, he's the only one 1678 01:28:09,792 --> 01:28:10,927 that appreciates my cooking, so... 1679 01:28:11,027 --> 01:28:12,563 - That's not true. - Uh, another drop? 1680 01:28:12,663 --> 01:28:14,665 Oh, no, no. I'm-I'm fine. Thank you. 1681 01:28:14,764 --> 01:28:17,033 Oh, um, fascinating story about the wine. 1682 01:28:17,133 --> 01:28:19,603 It's from a vineyard in Napa, 1683 01:28:19,735 --> 01:28:22,872 and the entire growing process from start to finish, 1684 01:28:22,972 --> 01:28:24,807 100% sustainable. 1685 01:28:24,907 --> 01:28:26,175 Is that right? 1686 01:28:26,275 --> 01:28:28,744 Not to mention, it tastes good, too. 1687 01:28:28,844 --> 01:28:29,946 - Mm-hmm. It does. - Mm. 1688 01:28:30,046 --> 01:28:32,248 You know, I-I didn't realize, uh... 1689 01:28:32,349 --> 01:28:33,749 Cynthia and Larry were telling me 1690 01:28:33,849 --> 01:28:35,284 that you spend so much time here. 1691 01:28:35,385 --> 01:28:37,119 Yeah, I... you've been working a lot, so... 1692 01:28:37,220 --> 01:28:39,356 Why did I think you were at Jared's? 1693 01:28:39,456 --> 01:28:40,756 I-I don't know. 1694 01:28:40,856 --> 01:28:42,124 ZOE: Evan was showing me 1695 01:28:42,225 --> 01:28:45,529 all of those scholarship contests that you found. 1696 01:28:45,629 --> 01:28:46,663 It's really impressive. 1697 01:28:46,762 --> 01:28:49,499 Well, Evan is a great writer. 1698 01:28:49,600 --> 01:28:51,000 CYNTHIA: Well, that does not 1699 01:28:51,100 --> 01:28:52,636 surprise me at all. 1700 01:28:53,437 --> 01:28:55,938 His English teacher last year told me that he wrote 1701 01:28:56,038 --> 01:28:58,508 one of the best papers she'd ever read on Sulu. 1702 01:28:58,609 --> 01:28:59,576 Is that right? 1703 01:28:59,676 --> 01:29:01,877 - It's Sula. - What? 1704 01:29:01,978 --> 01:29:03,279 You said "Sulu." It's Sula. 1705 01:29:03,380 --> 01:29:05,549 LARRY: Yeah, I believe Sulu's 1706 01:29:05,649 --> 01:29:07,484 a character on Star Trek. 1707 01:29:07,584 --> 01:29:09,885 (laughter) 1708 01:29:10,987 --> 01:29:12,489 My mistake. 1709 01:29:14,056 --> 01:29:17,427 So, speaking of scholarships... 1710 01:29:18,395 --> 01:29:19,496 Oh, right, uh... 1711 01:29:19,596 --> 01:29:21,931 Yeah, well, I guess... (clears throat) 1712 01:29:22,031 --> 01:29:25,435 now's as good a time as any. 1713 01:29:25,535 --> 01:29:27,604 Uh... 1714 01:29:27,704 --> 01:29:30,072 Cynthia, do you want to...? 1715 01:29:30,172 --> 01:29:30,873 Hmm. 1716 01:29:30,973 --> 01:29:32,743 Well, um... 1717 01:29:32,842 --> 01:29:36,446 Zoe happened to mention that Evan was having some difficulty 1718 01:29:36,546 --> 01:29:40,283 in terms of the financial burden of college. 1719 01:29:40,384 --> 01:29:43,819 And Larry and I started thinking, 1720 01:29:43,919 --> 01:29:45,489 and we've been fortunate enough 1721 01:29:45,589 --> 01:29:48,157 to set some money aside for Connor. 1722 01:29:51,595 --> 01:29:53,095 Um, I'm good. 1723 01:29:53,195 --> 01:29:54,731 - I'm okay. - Yeah. 1724 01:29:54,830 --> 01:29:57,300 Heidi, with your blessing, we would like to give Evan 1725 01:29:57,401 --> 01:29:59,101 the money that we set aside for our son 1726 01:29:59,201 --> 01:30:03,340 so he can fulfill his dreams. 1727 01:30:08,878 --> 01:30:11,415 Thank you so much... 1728 01:30:11,515 --> 01:30:13,015 but we're gonna be fine. 1729 01:30:13,115 --> 01:30:15,552 I don't have a lot of money, but I-I do have some. 1730 01:30:15,652 --> 01:30:17,053 Oh. 1731 01:30:17,153 --> 01:30:18,622 No, no, no, no, no. I didn't mean to intimate... 1732 01:30:18,722 --> 01:30:21,223 No, no, I understand, but, um, we do have money, 1733 01:30:21,325 --> 01:30:24,894 so I'm sorry you were under the impression that we didn't. 1734 01:30:24,994 --> 01:30:27,096 And whatever money we don't have, 1735 01:30:27,196 --> 01:30:30,099 Evan will either make up for with a job 1736 01:30:30,199 --> 01:30:31,635 or he'll get a scholarship. 1737 01:30:31,735 --> 01:30:34,771 I don't want my son to get the idea that it's okay 1738 01:30:34,870 --> 01:30:36,205 to rely on other people for favors. 1739 01:30:36,305 --> 01:30:38,140 - Well, it's not a favor. - No. 1740 01:30:38,240 --> 01:30:40,377 But as his mother, I need to set that example. 1741 01:30:40,477 --> 01:30:42,612 You can't expect things from strangers. 1742 01:30:42,713 --> 01:30:44,581 Oh, we're not strangers. 1743 01:30:44,681 --> 01:30:47,083 No, of course not. 1744 01:30:47,883 --> 01:30:49,985 But you're not family either. 1745 01:30:57,461 --> 01:30:58,861 Mom, just hold on. 1746 01:30:58,961 --> 01:31:00,530 No, I think I better get to work, 1747 01:31:00,630 --> 01:31:02,366 see if I can grab a shift now that I know 1748 01:31:02,466 --> 01:31:04,401 how concerned you are about our finances. 1749 01:31:04,501 --> 01:31:05,935 Mom, will you please come back inside? 1750 01:31:06,035 --> 01:31:07,970 Oh, my God. Are you kidding me? 1751 01:31:08,070 --> 01:31:10,172 Will you just come back inside, please? 1752 01:31:10,272 --> 01:31:12,409 They think you're their son, these people. 1753 01:31:13,242 --> 01:31:14,243 They're not "these people." 1754 01:31:14,344 --> 01:31:15,812 They don't really know you. 1755 01:31:15,911 --> 01:31:17,647 Well, they like me. They like me. 1756 01:31:17,748 --> 01:31:19,549 I know that that's very hard for you to believe, 1757 01:31:19,649 --> 01:31:20,950 that they don't think I'm... 1758 01:31:21,050 --> 01:31:22,319 you know, that there's something wrong with me, 1759 01:31:22,419 --> 01:31:23,886 that I need to be, like, fixed, like you do. 1760 01:31:23,986 --> 01:31:25,622 - When have I ever said that? - Oh, my God. 1761 01:31:25,722 --> 01:31:27,089 Mom, I-I have to go to therapy, right? 1762 01:31:27,189 --> 01:31:28,392 I have to take drugs. I have to... 1763 01:31:28,492 --> 01:31:30,126 There's-there's nothing wrong with that. 1764 01:31:30,226 --> 01:31:31,361 There-There's nothing wrong with needing help, honey. 1765 01:31:31,461 --> 01:31:32,629 Just stop. I know that there is, 1766 01:31:32,729 --> 01:31:34,096 and I know that I'm a burden, 1767 01:31:34,196 --> 01:31:35,499 that I'm the worst thing that ever happened to you, 1768 01:31:35,599 --> 01:31:36,733 and I just... well, I just ruined your life, okay?! 1769 01:31:36,833 --> 01:31:39,569 No. You are the best thing. 1770 01:31:39,669 --> 01:31:42,238 You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. 1771 01:31:43,440 --> 01:31:45,609 I'm sorry I can't give you anything more than that. 1772 01:31:46,976 --> 01:31:49,278 It's not my fault if other people can. 1773 01:31:56,353 --> 01:31:57,487 I'll see you at home. 1774 01:31:57,587 --> 01:31:59,856 (footsteps) 1775 01:31:59,955 --> 01:32:02,124 (car door opens, closes) 1776 01:32:02,224 --> 01:32:04,327 (engine starts) 1777 01:32:08,931 --> 01:32:10,333 (breathlessly): Hi. 1778 01:32:10,434 --> 01:32:12,001 I'm so sorry. I meant to be there yesterday. 1779 01:32:12,101 --> 01:32:15,639 Okay, well, we have two days left, and we're $25,000 short. 1780 01:32:15,739 --> 01:32:17,641 Yeah, I just... Everything... 1781 01:32:17,741 --> 01:32:19,141 You're right. I know. I'm sorry. 1782 01:32:19,241 --> 01:32:21,110 Things have been really busy, so... 1783 01:32:23,179 --> 01:32:24,748 I've been wondering something. 1784 01:32:24,848 --> 01:32:26,650 Mm-hmm? 1785 01:32:27,451 --> 01:32:29,453 Were you ever actually friends with him? 1786 01:32:31,086 --> 01:32:32,522 What are you talking about? 1787 01:32:32,622 --> 01:32:35,224 Well, the thing about the emails, it's just that, 1788 01:32:35,325 --> 01:32:37,193 like, you and Connor keep talking about 1789 01:32:37,293 --> 01:32:38,961 climbing this tree together in June. 1790 01:32:39,061 --> 01:32:40,029 Mm-hmm? 1791 01:32:40,129 --> 01:32:42,499 We were in school in June. 1792 01:32:43,299 --> 01:32:45,635 You didn't have a cast until September. 1793 01:32:45,735 --> 01:32:47,303 Well, uh, you know what? 1794 01:32:47,404 --> 01:32:49,171 We probably just wrote down the wrong date or something. 1795 01:32:49,271 --> 01:32:52,609 It's not just the emails, Evan. 1796 01:32:52,709 --> 01:32:55,177 You've missed, like, three meetings in a row. 1797 01:32:55,277 --> 01:32:57,112 If I were his best friend, 1798 01:32:57,213 --> 01:32:58,748 I would be doing everything I could to make sure 1799 01:32:58,849 --> 01:33:00,650 his dream of rebuilding the orchard came true. 1800 01:33:00,750 --> 01:33:02,251 Okay. 1801 01:33:02,352 --> 01:33:04,053 Look, it's terrible that people aren't giving 1802 01:33:04,153 --> 01:33:05,655 as much money as we hoped they would. 1803 01:33:05,755 --> 01:33:08,157 It is, but-but it's not like it's him. 1804 01:33:08,257 --> 01:33:09,459 You know what I mean? 1805 01:33:09,559 --> 01:33:11,695 It's-it's just... it's an orchard, Alana. 1806 01:33:11,795 --> 01:33:14,498 ♪ ♪ 1807 01:33:15,532 --> 01:33:18,735 We have people watching us, 1808 01:33:18,835 --> 01:33:20,804 hoping... 1809 01:33:20,904 --> 01:33:24,073 praying that we can prove Connor wrong. 1810 01:33:24,173 --> 01:33:27,310 And if the orchard is just an empty promise, 1811 01:33:27,410 --> 01:33:30,647 all of those people will know that Connor was right. 1812 01:33:32,181 --> 01:33:33,750 That no one cares. 1813 01:33:36,586 --> 01:33:38,788 (whispers): Did you lie to me? 1814 01:33:43,025 --> 01:33:45,294 Did I lie to all these people? 1815 01:33:51,835 --> 01:33:53,703 Just go to your email. 1816 01:33:53,803 --> 01:33:55,005 Another email? 1817 01:33:55,104 --> 01:33:57,072 It's not... 1818 01:33:57,172 --> 01:33:59,409 it's not another email. 1819 01:34:07,149 --> 01:34:09,452 "Dear Evan Hansen..." 1820 01:34:11,220 --> 01:34:13,456 If we weren't friends, then he wouldn't... 1821 01:34:15,257 --> 01:34:17,827 ...he wouldn't have written his note to me. 1822 01:34:20,664 --> 01:34:23,466 Look, only his family have seen this, okay? 1823 01:34:23,567 --> 01:34:27,470 You can't, you can't show it to anybody else, okay? 1824 01:34:27,571 --> 01:34:29,439 Alana. 1825 01:34:29,539 --> 01:34:30,774 Okay. 1826 01:34:30,874 --> 01:34:33,108 (school bell ringing) 1827 01:34:40,317 --> 01:34:42,251 He wasn't right. 1828 01:34:43,353 --> 01:34:45,355 You know that, don't you? 1829 01:35:01,972 --> 01:35:03,673 (Alana sniffles) 1830 01:35:05,075 --> 01:35:07,711 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1831 01:35:07,811 --> 01:35:10,447 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1832 01:35:10,547 --> 01:35:13,316 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1833 01:35:13,416 --> 01:35:15,885 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1834 01:35:15,986 --> 01:35:18,755 ♪ The anonymous one ♪ 1835 01:35:18,855 --> 01:35:20,857 ♪ Noticed by none ♪ 1836 01:35:20,957 --> 01:35:23,493 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 1837 01:35:23,593 --> 01:35:27,129 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1838 01:35:27,897 --> 01:35:30,265 ♪ ♪ 1839 01:35:30,367 --> 01:35:33,168 ♪ The parts we can't tell ♪ 1840 01:35:33,268 --> 01:35:35,572 ♪ We carry them well ♪ 1841 01:35:35,672 --> 01:35:40,209 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1842 01:35:40,310 --> 01:35:42,545 ♪ The parts we can't tell ♪ 1843 01:35:42,646 --> 01:35:44,714 ♪ We carry them well ♪ 1844 01:35:44,814 --> 01:35:51,688 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 1845 01:35:55,224 --> 01:35:57,460 ♪ ♪ 1846 01:36:02,264 --> 01:36:05,035 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 1847 01:36:05,135 --> 01:36:09,539 ♪ Who might just need this moment to remind them ♪ 1848 01:36:11,341 --> 01:36:14,878 ♪ That there are more anonymous ones ♪ 1849 01:36:14,978 --> 01:36:19,649 ♪ They're out there if you take the time to find them ♪ 1850 01:36:27,090 --> 01:36:32,696 ♪ Just to know we're somehow not alone ♪ 1851 01:36:32,796 --> 01:36:39,569 ♪ Isn't that all we're ever really looking for? ♪ 1852 01:36:44,074 --> 01:36:45,675 ♪ ♪ 1853 01:36:52,916 --> 01:36:53,983 (sighs softly) 1854 01:37:02,092 --> 01:37:04,694 ♪ Maybe we ♪ 1855 01:37:04,794 --> 01:37:07,630 ♪ We don't have to be ♪ 1856 01:37:11,000 --> 01:37:13,503 - ♪ Anonymous anymore. ♪ - (song ends) 1857 01:37:19,008 --> 01:37:20,343 ♪ ♪ 1858 01:37:20,443 --> 01:37:22,011 (computer alert chimes) 1859 01:37:27,817 --> 01:37:30,553 (alerts chiming) 1860 01:37:33,255 --> 01:37:34,824 (chiming continues) 1861 01:37:36,426 --> 01:37:38,661 (phone vibrating) 1862 01:37:40,563 --> 01:37:42,098 (phone clicks) 1863 01:37:42,198 --> 01:37:45,034 ♪ ♪ 1864 01:37:49,072 --> 01:37:50,907 - (lively chatter) - GIRL: Can you imagine? 1865 01:37:51,007 --> 01:37:52,776 (phones chiming) 1866 01:37:52,876 --> 01:37:55,378 - (chatter continues) - (girl laughs) 1867 01:37:55,478 --> 01:37:57,714 (phones chiming) 1868 01:38:01,084 --> 01:38:03,219 (message alerts chirping) 1869 01:38:03,319 --> 01:38:05,588 (chatter quiets) 1870 01:38:08,825 --> 01:38:10,660 Wh-What's wrong? 1871 01:38:10,760 --> 01:38:12,462 ♪ ♪ 1872 01:38:16,199 --> 01:38:18,101 - Yep. - (busy chatter) 1873 01:38:18,201 --> 01:38:19,769 (scanner beeping) 1874 01:38:24,207 --> 01:38:25,675 (phone chimes) 1875 01:38:31,214 --> 01:38:33,550 ♪ ♪ 1876 01:38:47,463 --> 01:38:49,699 (phone vibrating) 1877 01:38:51,734 --> 01:38:52,769 Hi. 1878 01:38:52,869 --> 01:38:54,637 Alana, you have to take it down, okay? 1879 01:38:54,737 --> 01:38:56,139 They've been through enough. 1880 01:38:56,239 --> 01:38:58,174 I took it down already, Evan, but it-it doesn't matter 1881 01:38:58,274 --> 01:38:59,676 because it's everywhere. 1882 01:39:04,914 --> 01:39:07,517 ♪ ♪ 1883 01:39:07,617 --> 01:39:08,651 Zoe, it's me. 1884 01:39:08,751 --> 01:39:10,053 Please call me back, okay? 1885 01:39:10,153 --> 01:39:11,621 I'm worried about you. 1886 01:39:11,721 --> 01:39:13,423 They have pictures of us now. 1887 01:39:13,523 --> 01:39:14,757 Just put it away. 1888 01:39:14,858 --> 01:39:16,726 "His parents act like they are bereft, 1889 01:39:16,826 --> 01:39:19,495 but where were they when their son was actually alive?" 1890 01:39:19,596 --> 01:39:21,831 Please stop reading them. 1891 01:39:24,000 --> 01:39:26,369 - Hey. Is Zoe here? - She went home. 1892 01:39:26,469 --> 01:39:28,404 (sighs) 1893 01:39:28,504 --> 01:39:31,507 ♪ ♪ 1894 01:39:36,279 --> 01:39:39,549 (Larry and Cynthia arguing faintly in distance) 1895 01:39:42,585 --> 01:39:43,720 Things really aren't good here. 1896 01:39:43,820 --> 01:39:46,289 I know. I just... I had to come. 1897 01:39:47,223 --> 01:39:49,292 CYNTHIA: Where did they even... How did they get Connor's note? 1898 01:39:49,392 --> 01:39:50,693 LARRY: I don't know. 1899 01:39:50,793 --> 01:39:52,295 CYNTHIA: Like, did they hack our computers? 1900 01:39:52,395 --> 01:39:54,264 They hacked our emails? Did... These people are adults. 1901 01:39:54,365 --> 01:39:55,732 Did you see their pictures? 1902 01:39:55,832 --> 01:39:56,933 - These people are adults. - (ringtone playing) 1903 01:39:57,033 --> 01:39:58,635 LARRY: Look, maybe let it ring. 1904 01:39:58,735 --> 01:40:00,904 ZOE: I'm sick of hiding. Hello? 1905 01:40:01,004 --> 01:40:02,505 Yeah, have-have fun with your miserable life. 1906 01:40:02,605 --> 01:40:04,341 LARRY: What did they say? What's the number? 1907 01:40:04,440 --> 01:40:05,608 It's blocked. 1908 01:40:05,708 --> 01:40:07,043 It doesn't... No, it doesn't matter. 1909 01:40:07,143 --> 01:40:08,845 CYNTHIA: That's it. I'm calling the police. 1910 01:40:08,945 --> 01:40:10,079 LARRY: No, look, right now, maybe the best thing to do 1911 01:40:10,179 --> 01:40:11,781 is to just stay calm, all right? 1912 01:40:11,881 --> 01:40:13,616 - And sit... - CYNTHIA: That's always your solution, isn't it? 1913 01:40:13,716 --> 01:40:14,951 Wait and see. Let's just wait and see, right, Larry? 1914 01:40:15,051 --> 01:40:16,286 LARRY: What are the police going to do? 1915 01:40:16,387 --> 01:40:17,553 It's the Internet. Wh... 1916 01:40:17,654 --> 01:40:19,055 Are they gonna arrest the Internet? 1917 01:40:19,155 --> 01:40:20,357 CYNTHIA: I had to beg you, every step of the way, 1918 01:40:20,456 --> 01:40:21,424 for-for therapy, for-for rehab. 1919 01:40:21,524 --> 01:40:23,026 LARRY: What? N-No, no. 1920 01:40:23,126 --> 01:40:24,861 You went lurching from one miracle cure to the next... 1921 01:40:24,961 --> 01:40:26,629 CYNTHIA: Oh, you're... Really? 1922 01:40:26,729 --> 01:40:28,598 LARRY: ...because all he needed was another $20,000 1923 01:40:28,698 --> 01:40:29,666 weekend yoga retreat. 1924 01:40:29,766 --> 01:40:31,067 What was your alternative, 1925 01:40:31,167 --> 01:40:32,635 other than picking apart everything that I did? 1926 01:40:32,735 --> 01:40:34,704 LARRY: How about putting him on 1927 01:40:34,804 --> 01:40:36,472 one program and sticking to it? 1928 01:40:36,572 --> 01:40:38,207 CYNTHIA: Remember what he said 1929 01:40:38,308 --> 01:40:40,276 the first time that Connor tried to kill himself? 1930 01:40:40,377 --> 01:40:41,945 - That he's just looking for attention. - For Christ's sake. 1931 01:40:42,045 --> 01:40:43,646 CYNTHIA: He just wants attention! 1932 01:40:43,746 --> 01:40:45,416 LARRY: I'm not gonna sit here and defend myself! 1933 01:40:45,515 --> 01:40:46,783 CYNTHIA: You couldn't understand him. 1934 01:40:46,883 --> 01:40:50,053 You never understood him because he wasn't yours! 1935 01:40:50,153 --> 01:40:51,988 Mom, what the hell? 1936 01:40:52,088 --> 01:40:53,856 I raised him from the time he was three years old. 1937 01:40:53,957 --> 01:40:55,558 He was getting better, and you refused to see it. Ask Evan. 1938 01:40:55,658 --> 01:40:57,527 Tell them, Evan. 1939 01:40:57,627 --> 01:40:59,162 Evan did everything that he could. 1940 01:40:59,262 --> 01:41:02,098 Evan? Evan was in denial of what was happening. 1941 01:41:02,198 --> 01:41:03,933 ZOE: Do not bring him into this. 1942 01:41:04,033 --> 01:41:05,301 CYNTHIA: Read the note, Larry. 1943 01:41:05,402 --> 01:41:06,803 Read what he said. 1944 01:41:06,903 --> 01:41:09,038 "I just wish that everything was different." 1945 01:41:09,138 --> 01:41:10,773 LARRY: I tried. 1946 01:41:10,873 --> 01:41:12,409 - But he was my son! - He wanted to be better! - ZOE: Please. 1947 01:41:12,508 --> 01:41:13,609 LARRY: I-I tried everything! 1948 01:41:13,710 --> 01:41:15,144 ZOE: Stop it! Just please stop! 1949 01:41:15,244 --> 01:41:17,680 - Please stop fighting! - He was trying to be better! 1950 01:41:17,780 --> 01:41:18,681 He was trying! 1951 01:41:18,781 --> 01:41:20,317 And he was failing. 1952 01:41:20,417 --> 01:41:22,719 We failed him. 1953 01:41:23,553 --> 01:41:25,088 No, you didn't. No, you didn't. 1954 01:41:25,188 --> 01:41:26,489 You didn't fail him. 1955 01:41:28,459 --> 01:41:29,859 Read the note. 1956 01:41:31,527 --> 01:41:33,262 (voice breaking): He didn't write it. 1957 01:41:39,102 --> 01:41:40,136 I wrote it. 1958 01:41:40,236 --> 01:41:43,940 You didn't write Connor's suicide note. 1959 01:41:44,707 --> 01:41:48,312 Um, it was an assignment from my therapist. 1960 01:41:48,412 --> 01:41:50,347 Write a letter to yourself, um, a pep talk. 1961 01:41:50,447 --> 01:41:52,582 "Evan Hansen, Dear Evan Hansen, today's gonna be a good day. 1962 01:41:52,682 --> 01:41:54,150 - Here's why." - I-I don't, I don't think that... 1963 01:41:54,250 --> 01:41:55,985 I was supposed to bring it to my appointment with me, 1964 01:41:56,085 --> 01:41:58,355 but Connor took it, and then I guess he must have had it 1965 01:41:58,455 --> 01:42:00,556 with him, um... 1966 01:42:02,493 --> 01:42:04,994 ...when you found him, so... 1967 01:42:09,632 --> 01:42:11,200 What are you saying? 1968 01:42:12,802 --> 01:42:14,438 We weren't friends. 1969 01:42:14,570 --> 01:42:16,039 No. 1970 01:42:16,139 --> 01:42:17,240 No, no, no, no. 1971 01:42:17,341 --> 01:42:20,009 ♪ I never meant to make it such a mess ♪ 1972 01:42:20,109 --> 01:42:21,744 (sniffles) 1973 01:42:21,844 --> 01:42:24,647 ♪ I never thought that it would go this far ♪ 1974 01:42:24,747 --> 01:42:27,050 There were emails. You showed us emails. 1975 01:42:27,150 --> 01:42:31,287 ♪ So I just stand here sorry ♪ 1976 01:42:31,388 --> 01:42:34,190 ♪ Searching for something to say ♪ 1977 01:42:34,290 --> 01:42:35,359 Mm. 1978 01:42:35,459 --> 01:42:36,759 ♪ Something to say ♪ 1979 01:42:36,859 --> 01:42:39,295 Y-Y-You knew about the orchard. 1980 01:42:39,396 --> 01:42:41,465 He-he took you to the orchard. 1981 01:42:41,564 --> 01:42:43,099 That's where you broke your arm. 1982 01:42:43,199 --> 01:42:46,836 I broke my arm in Ellison Park, um, by myself. 1983 01:42:46,936 --> 01:42:49,639 But that day at the orchard... 1984 01:42:51,040 --> 01:42:53,176 You and Connor at the orchard. 1985 01:42:53,276 --> 01:42:55,312 ♪ ♪ 1986 01:42:57,414 --> 01:42:59,649 ♪ Words fail ♪ 1987 01:43:00,517 --> 01:43:02,752 ♪ Words fail ♪ 1988 01:43:03,920 --> 01:43:06,856 ♪ There's nothing I can say ♪ 1989 01:43:06,956 --> 01:43:08,325 Oh, God. 1990 01:43:10,093 --> 01:43:12,628 But you said that you guys would talk about me. 1991 01:43:12,728 --> 01:43:14,630 He would... 1992 01:43:14,730 --> 01:43:16,099 How could you do this? 1993 01:43:16,199 --> 01:43:19,035 ♪ I guess I thought I could be part of this ♪ 1994 01:43:20,169 --> 01:43:23,272 ♪ I never had this kind of thing before ♪ 1995 01:43:24,408 --> 01:43:27,478 ♪ I never had that perfect girl ♪ 1996 01:43:27,578 --> 01:43:33,082 ♪ Who somehow could see the good part of me ♪ 1997 01:43:34,283 --> 01:43:37,053 ♪ I never had the dad who stuck it out ♪ 1998 01:43:38,254 --> 01:43:42,091 ♪ No corny jokes or baseball gloves ♪ 1999 01:43:42,191 --> 01:43:44,495 ♪ No mom who just was there ♪ 2000 01:43:44,595 --> 01:43:50,099 ♪ 'Cause mom was all that she had to be ♪ 2001 01:43:50,199 --> 01:43:54,270 ♪ That's not a worthy explanation ♪ 2002 01:43:54,371 --> 01:43:57,240 ♪ I know there is none ♪ 2003 01:43:57,341 --> 01:43:58,975 (sobbing) 2004 01:43:59,075 --> 01:44:04,881 ♪ Nothing can make sense of all these things I've done ♪ 2005 01:44:06,649 --> 01:44:11,220 ♪ Words fail, words fail ♪ 2006 01:44:11,321 --> 01:44:14,690 ♪ There's nothing I can say ♪ 2007 01:44:14,790 --> 01:44:18,562 ♪ Except sometimes you see everything you wanted ♪ 2008 01:44:18,661 --> 01:44:20,531 ♪ And sometimes ♪ 2009 01:44:20,631 --> 01:44:23,099 (sobbing): ♪ You see everything you wish you had ♪ 2010 01:44:23,199 --> 01:44:28,372 ♪ And it's right there, right there, right there ♪ 2011 01:44:28,472 --> 01:44:30,840 ♪ In front of you ♪ 2012 01:44:35,345 --> 01:44:38,848 ♪ And you want to believe it's true ♪ 2013 01:44:44,687 --> 01:44:47,857 ♪ So you make it true ♪ 2014 01:44:51,227 --> 01:44:54,964 ♪ And you think maybe ♪ 2015 01:44:55,064 --> 01:45:00,836 ♪ Everybody wants it ♪ 2016 01:45:03,340 --> 01:45:05,074 ♪ And needs it ♪ 2017 01:45:06,809 --> 01:45:10,414 ♪ A little bit, too. ♪ 2018 01:45:10,514 --> 01:45:12,748 (song ends) 2019 01:45:26,862 --> 01:45:28,264 LARRY: Zoe. 2020 01:45:30,833 --> 01:45:32,502 ♪ ♪ 2021 01:45:37,273 --> 01:45:40,344 I think it's time for you to go. 2022 01:45:52,656 --> 01:45:55,958 (door opens, closes) 2023 01:45:58,794 --> 01:46:01,030 ♪ ♪ 2024 01:46:12,476 --> 01:46:13,610 Go away, Evan. 2025 01:46:13,710 --> 01:46:15,044 It isn't fair, okay? 2026 01:46:15,144 --> 01:46:16,580 You can't, you can't let people 2027 01:46:16,680 --> 01:46:18,715 just blame you and your parents. 2028 01:46:18,814 --> 01:46:19,982 They need to know it was me, okay? 2029 01:46:20,082 --> 01:46:21,250 I'm the one people should hate. 2030 01:46:21,351 --> 01:46:23,919 Yeah, well, we're not telling anyone. 2031 01:46:24,020 --> 01:46:25,589 Well, that's... I... 2032 01:46:25,689 --> 01:46:28,592 You can't... You have to. 2033 01:46:28,692 --> 01:46:30,727 It's not my decision. 2034 01:46:30,826 --> 01:46:32,295 It's my mom's. 2035 01:46:32,396 --> 01:46:33,963 She doesn't want to ruin your life. 2036 01:46:34,063 --> 01:46:36,566 She's afraid you'll do something stupid. 2037 01:46:36,667 --> 01:46:38,635 Like hurt yourself. 2038 01:46:38,735 --> 01:46:40,136 (sniffles) 2039 01:46:42,539 --> 01:46:45,375 She said they already lost one son. 2040 01:46:49,713 --> 01:46:52,081 (sobbing): Can you just... 2041 01:46:52,181 --> 01:46:54,685 leave my family alone, okay? 2042 01:46:54,785 --> 01:46:57,019 ♪ ♪ 2043 01:47:16,573 --> 01:47:18,608 ♪ ♪ 2044 01:47:22,144 --> 01:47:26,483 ♪ This was just a sad invention ♪ 2045 01:47:27,784 --> 01:47:30,554 ♪ It wasn't real, I know ♪ 2046 01:47:32,188 --> 01:47:34,290 ♪ But we were happy ♪ 2047 01:47:35,858 --> 01:47:39,396 ♪ I guess I couldn't let that go ♪ 2048 01:47:41,230 --> 01:47:44,233 ♪ I guess I couldn't give that up ♪ 2049 01:47:45,502 --> 01:47:48,237 ♪ I guess I wanted to believe ♪ 2050 01:47:48,338 --> 01:47:50,973 ♪ 'Cause if I just believe ♪ (sniffles) 2051 01:47:51,073 --> 01:47:53,876 ♪ Then I don't have to see ♪ 2052 01:47:53,976 --> 01:47:56,380 ♪ What's really there ♪ 2053 01:47:58,080 --> 01:47:59,783 ♪ No, I'd rather pretend ♪ 2054 01:47:59,882 --> 01:48:03,119 ♪ I'm something better than these broken parts ♪ 2055 01:48:03,219 --> 01:48:06,055 ♪ Pretend I'm something other than ♪ 2056 01:48:06,155 --> 01:48:08,090 ♪ This mess that I am ♪ 2057 01:48:08,190 --> 01:48:11,026 ♪ 'Cause then I don't have to look at it ♪ 2058 01:48:11,127 --> 01:48:13,330 ♪ And no one gets to look at it ♪ 2059 01:48:13,430 --> 01:48:18,300 ♪ No, no one can really see ♪ 2060 01:48:18,402 --> 01:48:22,506 ♪ 'Cause I've learned to slam on the brake ♪ 2061 01:48:22,606 --> 01:48:27,143 ♪ Before I even turn the key ♪ 2062 01:48:27,243 --> 01:48:31,448 ♪ Before I make the mistake ♪ 2063 01:48:31,548 --> 01:48:35,318 ♪ Before I lead with the worst of me ♪ 2064 01:48:35,419 --> 01:48:37,687 ♪ I never let them see ♪ 2065 01:48:37,788 --> 01:48:46,396 ♪ The worst of me ♪ 2066 01:48:51,535 --> 01:48:53,936 ♪ ♪ 2067 01:48:54,036 --> 01:48:55,839 (sobs) 2068 01:48:55,938 --> 01:48:57,674 ♪ 'Cause what if everyone saw? ♪ 2069 01:48:57,774 --> 01:49:00,377 (sobbing) 2070 01:49:01,878 --> 01:49:04,481 ♪ What if everyone knew? ♪ 2071 01:49:06,383 --> 01:49:09,084 ♪ Would they like what they saw? ♪ 2072 01:49:11,020 --> 01:49:14,223 ♪ Or would they hate it, too? ♪ 2073 01:49:25,201 --> 01:49:29,639 ♪ Will I just keep on running away ♪ 2074 01:49:29,739 --> 01:49:33,743 ♪ From what's true? ♪ 2075 01:49:36,780 --> 01:49:42,352 ♪ All I ever do is run ♪ 2076 01:49:45,422 --> 01:49:50,192 ♪ So how do I step in ♪ 2077 01:49:54,531 --> 01:50:03,005 ♪ Step into the sun? ♪ 2078 01:50:04,306 --> 01:50:10,981 ♪ Step into the sun. ♪ 2079 01:50:11,080 --> 01:50:13,282 ♪ ♪ 2080 01:50:26,061 --> 01:50:28,297 (song ends) 2081 01:50:42,879 --> 01:50:44,280 (lock clicks) 2082 01:50:45,515 --> 01:50:47,116 (calling out): Evan? 2083 01:50:47,884 --> 01:50:49,586 Evan? 2084 01:50:58,093 --> 01:50:59,496 Evan? 2085 01:51:16,078 --> 01:51:17,647 Oh, honey. 2086 01:51:23,320 --> 01:51:25,422 "Dear Evan Hansen..." 2087 01:51:27,324 --> 01:51:29,726 You wrote this? Connor's note? 2088 01:51:32,261 --> 01:51:33,162 (sighs softly) 2089 01:51:33,262 --> 01:51:34,798 I didn't know. 2090 01:51:34,898 --> 01:51:36,366 No one did. 2091 01:51:36,466 --> 01:51:38,568 No, honey, that's... 2092 01:51:39,903 --> 01:51:42,137 ...that's not what I meant. 2093 01:51:43,640 --> 01:51:45,875 I didn't know that you were... 2094 01:51:46,810 --> 01:51:49,178 ...that you were hurting like that. 2095 01:51:49,278 --> 01:51:51,681 That you felt... 2096 01:51:51,781 --> 01:51:53,516 I didn't know. 2097 01:51:55,919 --> 01:51:57,654 I lied. 2098 01:52:01,424 --> 01:52:03,827 I lied about so many things. 2099 01:52:06,363 --> 01:52:08,598 Not just Connor. Um... 2100 01:52:10,900 --> 01:52:12,469 (sighs) 2101 01:52:13,235 --> 01:52:15,639 So, last summer, um... 2102 01:52:18,273 --> 01:52:19,843 ...I just... 2103 01:52:22,277 --> 01:52:25,147 ...I just felt so alone. Um... 2104 01:52:28,018 --> 01:52:29,586 You can tell me. 2105 01:52:32,722 --> 01:52:34,457 The tree. 2106 01:52:37,292 --> 01:52:39,496 I didn't fall. 2107 01:52:42,565 --> 01:52:43,767 I let go. 2108 01:52:47,737 --> 01:52:50,340 - Oh, Evan. - Do you hate me now? 2109 01:52:52,442 --> 01:52:55,845 (voice breaking): You should. You should. 2110 01:52:55,945 --> 01:53:00,650 If you knew who I am, just how just broken I am. 2111 01:53:01,451 --> 01:53:03,553 I already know you. 2112 01:53:04,954 --> 01:53:06,356 And I love you. 2113 01:53:12,194 --> 01:53:14,431 I can promise you that... 2114 01:53:16,766 --> 01:53:18,134 ...someday... 2115 01:53:19,069 --> 01:53:22,772 ...all of this is gonna feel like a very long time ago. 2116 01:53:26,876 --> 01:53:28,778 Ah. (sighs) 2117 01:53:30,146 --> 01:53:32,382 Your dad, um... (sniffles) 2118 01:53:34,984 --> 01:53:37,654 Do you remember when he drove by to get his things? 2119 01:53:37,754 --> 01:53:39,789 ♪ ♪ 2120 01:53:42,892 --> 01:53:45,829 It was a few weeks after he moved out. 2121 01:53:47,397 --> 01:53:49,632 Temporarily, we said. 2122 01:53:50,734 --> 01:53:53,570 ♪ It was a February day ♪ 2123 01:53:54,938 --> 01:54:00,343 ♪ When your dad came by before going away ♪ 2124 01:54:01,444 --> 01:54:04,914 ♪ A U-Haul truck in the driveway ♪ 2125 01:54:06,449 --> 01:54:11,554 ♪ The day it was suddenly real ♪ 2126 01:54:12,722 --> 01:54:15,859 ♪ I told you not to come outside ♪ 2127 01:54:16,760 --> 01:54:22,398 ♪ But you saw that truck, and you smiled so wide ♪ 2128 01:54:22,499 --> 01:54:23,833 (sniffles) 2129 01:54:23,933 --> 01:54:28,705 ♪ A real live truck in your driveway ♪ 2130 01:54:29,539 --> 01:54:33,743 ♪ We let you sit behind the wheel ♪ 2131 01:54:36,312 --> 01:54:41,283 ♪ Goodbye, goodbye ♪ 2132 01:54:42,085 --> 01:54:45,588 ♪ Now it's just me ♪ 2133 01:54:45,688 --> 01:54:48,858 ♪ And my little guy ♪ 2134 01:54:50,927 --> 01:54:55,698 ♪ And the house felt so big ♪ 2135 01:54:57,500 --> 01:55:02,639 ♪ And I felt so small ♪ 2136 01:55:03,673 --> 01:55:08,478 ♪ The house felt so big ♪ 2137 01:55:09,679 --> 01:55:14,551 ♪ And I felt so small ♪ 2138 01:55:16,219 --> 01:55:19,489 ♪ That night, I tucked you into bed ♪ 2139 01:55:20,590 --> 01:55:25,962 ♪ I will never forget how you sat up and said ♪ 2140 01:55:26,062 --> 01:55:30,533 ♪ "Is there another truck coming to our driveway? ♪ 2141 01:55:31,568 --> 01:55:37,373 ♪ A truck that will take Mommy away?" ♪ 2142 01:55:38,842 --> 01:55:44,414 ♪ And the house felt so big ♪ 2143 01:55:45,215 --> 01:55:50,820 ♪ And I felt so small ♪ 2144 01:55:51,654 --> 01:55:56,860 ♪ The house felt so big ♪ 2145 01:55:56,960 --> 01:55:59,729 ♪ And I ♪ 2146 01:55:59,829 --> 01:56:03,633 ♪ And I knew there would be ♪ 2147 01:56:03,733 --> 01:56:06,603 ♪ Moments that I'd miss ♪ 2148 01:56:06,703 --> 01:56:10,073 ♪ And I knew there would be ♪ 2149 01:56:10,173 --> 01:56:12,508 ♪ Space I couldn't fill ♪ 2150 01:56:12,609 --> 01:56:15,912 ♪ And I knew I'd come up short ♪ 2151 01:56:16,012 --> 01:56:20,516 ♪ A million different ways ♪ 2152 01:56:20,617 --> 01:56:23,419 ♪ And I did ♪ 2153 01:56:25,121 --> 01:56:28,925 ♪ And I do ♪ 2154 01:56:30,361 --> 01:56:32,962 ♪ And I will ♪ 2155 01:56:34,931 --> 01:56:37,867 ♪ But like that February day ♪ 2156 01:56:39,370 --> 01:56:41,437 ♪ I will take your hand ♪ 2157 01:56:41,537 --> 01:56:44,941 ♪ Squeeze it tightly and say ♪ 2158 01:56:45,041 --> 01:56:48,845 ♪ "There's not another truck in the driveway ♪ 2159 01:56:50,046 --> 01:56:52,649 ♪ "Your mom isn't going anywhere ♪ 2160 01:56:52,749 --> 01:56:55,585 ♪ "Your mom is staying right here ♪ 2161 01:56:55,685 --> 01:56:58,187 ♪ "Your mom isn't going anywhere ♪ 2162 01:56:58,288 --> 01:57:01,891 ♪ Your mom is staying right here" ♪ 2163 01:57:02,659 --> 01:57:04,928 ♪ No matter what ♪ 2164 01:57:07,196 --> 01:57:11,734 ♪ I'll be here ♪ 2165 01:57:12,535 --> 01:57:17,774 ♪ When it all feels so big ♪ 2166 01:57:18,775 --> 01:57:23,947 ♪ Till it all feels so small ♪ 2167 01:57:24,747 --> 01:57:29,652 ♪ When it all feels so big ♪ 2168 01:57:30,720 --> 01:57:33,990 ♪ Till it all feels ♪ 2169 01:57:34,090 --> 01:57:40,496 ♪ So small ♪ 2170 01:57:42,632 --> 01:57:49,238 ♪ Till it all feels so small. ♪ 2171 01:57:49,340 --> 01:57:50,506 (kisses, sniffles) 2172 01:57:50,606 --> 01:57:51,874 Oh. 2173 01:57:51,975 --> 01:57:53,176 (sniffles) 2174 01:57:55,211 --> 01:57:57,480 (smacks lips, sighs) 2175 01:57:57,580 --> 01:58:00,216 It's gonna get better, I promise. 2176 01:58:01,184 --> 01:58:03,219 (song ends) 2177 01:58:14,697 --> 01:58:17,100 I was never friends with Connor Murphy. 2178 01:58:18,469 --> 01:58:20,903 I lied, 2179 01:58:21,004 --> 01:58:22,505 repeatedly, 2180 01:58:22,605 --> 01:58:25,442 to his family, 2181 01:58:25,541 --> 01:58:28,111 to Alana, 2182 01:58:28,211 --> 01:58:30,113 to all of you. 2183 01:58:31,614 --> 01:58:33,249 I'm not asking for your forgiveness. 2184 01:58:33,350 --> 01:58:34,351 I don't deserve it. 2185 01:58:34,451 --> 01:58:37,086 But, um, please... 2186 01:58:38,389 --> 01:58:41,157 Connor's family doesn't deserve your hatred. 2187 01:58:42,692 --> 01:58:44,260 I do. 2188 01:58:46,529 --> 01:58:48,097 I'm sorry. 2189 01:59:08,352 --> 01:59:09,919 (sighs softly) 2190 01:59:33,643 --> 01:59:36,646 (guitar playing gentle melody) 2191 01:59:52,695 --> 01:59:54,931 ♪ ♪ 2192 02:00:00,636 --> 02:00:03,306 CONNOR: ♪ Spent so many seasons ♪ 2193 02:00:03,407 --> 02:00:06,577 ♪ Lost inside my mind ♪ 2194 02:00:06,676 --> 02:00:11,147 ♪ Lost inside my mind ♪ 2195 02:00:12,682 --> 02:00:14,851 ♪ Like a message in a bottle ♪ 2196 02:00:14,951 --> 02:00:17,620 ♪ I thought nobody would find ♪ 2197 02:00:17,720 --> 02:00:22,291 - ♪ That nobody would find ♪ - (computer chiming) 2198 02:00:23,893 --> 02:00:27,029 ♪ I've been drifting, I've been dreaming ♪ 2199 02:00:27,130 --> 02:00:29,966 ♪ I would land upon the shore ♪ 2200 02:00:30,066 --> 02:00:33,504 ♪ To a haven, to a harbor ♪ 2201 02:00:33,604 --> 02:00:38,141 ♪ That felt so far before ♪ 2202 02:00:39,443 --> 02:00:42,312 ♪ Well, today ♪ 2203 02:00:42,412 --> 02:00:45,349 ♪ Today ♪ 2204 02:00:45,449 --> 02:00:47,783 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2205 02:00:47,884 --> 02:00:51,388 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2206 02:00:51,488 --> 02:00:57,628 ♪ For today, today ♪ 2207 02:00:57,727 --> 02:01:00,062 ♪ Today ♪ 2208 02:01:01,964 --> 02:01:06,969 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2209 02:01:09,939 --> 02:01:12,108 ♪ How long these days of darkness ♪ 2210 02:01:12,208 --> 02:01:15,646 ♪ At the bottom of a well ♪ 2211 02:01:15,745 --> 02:01:20,249 ♪ That old, familiar well ♪ 2212 02:01:21,951 --> 02:01:25,489 ♪ Sitting heavy with these secrets ♪ 2213 02:01:25,589 --> 02:01:27,857 ♪ With nobody to tell ♪ 2214 02:01:27,957 --> 02:01:31,827 ♪ Nobody to tell ♪ 2215 02:01:32,629 --> 02:01:34,864 - Okay, your turn. Come on. - ♪ High above ♪ 2216 02:01:34,964 --> 02:01:36,600 ♪ A streak of sunlight ♪ 2217 02:01:36,699 --> 02:01:39,235 ♪ And a wall too tall to climb ♪ 2218 02:01:39,336 --> 02:01:43,139 ♪ All the reaching, all the wanting ♪ 2219 02:01:43,239 --> 02:01:46,742 ♪ Just to tumble every time ♪ 2220 02:01:46,842 --> 02:01:47,910 - I think we got it. - (laughs) 2221 02:01:48,010 --> 02:01:49,680 - (laughs) - All right. 2222 02:01:49,779 --> 02:01:52,715 ♪ But today ♪ 2223 02:01:52,815 --> 02:01:55,419 ♪ Today ♪ 2224 02:01:55,519 --> 02:01:57,720 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2225 02:01:57,820 --> 02:02:01,358 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2226 02:02:01,458 --> 02:02:07,730 ♪ For today, today ♪ 2227 02:02:07,830 --> 02:02:10,299 ♪ Today ♪ 2228 02:02:12,969 --> 02:02:16,172 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2229 02:02:16,973 --> 02:02:19,175 ♪ ♪ 2230 02:02:25,248 --> 02:02:31,754 ♪ And the days carry on ♪ 2231 02:02:31,854 --> 02:02:33,724 ♪ The clouds come rolling in ♪ 2232 02:02:33,823 --> 02:02:37,093 ♪ And then they're gone ♪ 2233 02:02:37,193 --> 02:02:44,100 ♪ As the days keep coming on ♪ 2234 02:02:44,200 --> 02:02:48,804 ♪ The midnight sky turns to dawn ♪ 2235 02:02:51,708 --> 02:02:53,943 (song pauses) 2236 02:02:58,749 --> 02:03:04,755 (over speakers): ♪ Today, today ♪ 2237 02:03:04,854 --> 02:03:07,223 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2238 02:03:07,324 --> 02:03:11,294 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2239 02:03:11,395 --> 02:03:17,501 ♪ Today, today ♪ 2240 02:03:17,601 --> 02:03:19,802 ♪ What felt so far away ♪ 2241 02:03:19,902 --> 02:03:24,206 ♪ Feels a little closer ♪ 2242 02:03:24,307 --> 02:03:30,212 ♪ For today, today ♪ 2243 02:03:30,314 --> 02:03:33,215 ♪ Today ♪ 2244 02:03:35,719 --> 02:03:38,789 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2245 02:03:38,888 --> 02:03:41,325 ♪ A little closer ♪ 2246 02:03:41,425 --> 02:03:44,960 ♪ It feels a little closer ♪ 2247 02:03:45,061 --> 02:03:48,365 ♪ A little closer ♪ 2248 02:03:50,933 --> 02:03:55,071 ♪ It feels a little closer. ♪ 2249 02:03:55,171 --> 02:03:57,407 (guitar continues gentle melody) 2250 02:04:11,722 --> 02:04:13,623 (song ends) 2251 02:04:13,724 --> 02:04:15,958 (birds chirping) 2252 02:04:36,946 --> 02:04:39,816 You must start school pretty soon. 2253 02:04:39,915 --> 02:04:42,017 Two more weeks. 2254 02:04:43,820 --> 02:04:46,122 When do you leave for college? 2255 02:04:46,222 --> 02:04:50,827 Um, actually I decided to take a year off, so... 2256 02:04:50,926 --> 02:04:52,696 Uh, just try to save some money. 2257 02:04:52,796 --> 02:04:54,464 Get a job. 2258 02:04:54,564 --> 02:04:57,967 Uh... take some time. 2259 02:04:58,067 --> 02:05:00,337 So, I'm taking classes at the community college. 2260 02:05:00,437 --> 02:05:03,540 I'll have credits to transfer in the fall, so... 2261 02:05:04,608 --> 02:05:05,675 That's smart. 2262 02:05:05,776 --> 02:05:07,677 (chuckles): Yeah. We'll see. 2263 02:05:10,045 --> 02:05:11,180 (Zoe sighs) 2264 02:05:11,280 --> 02:05:13,617 I always picture you and Connor here. 2265 02:05:14,917 --> 02:05:16,653 Even though... 2266 02:05:18,321 --> 02:05:20,424 This is my first time. 2267 02:05:21,825 --> 02:05:23,560 It's nice. 2268 02:05:24,828 --> 02:05:26,530 Peaceful. 2269 02:05:27,531 --> 02:05:30,500 My parents come here all the time. 2270 02:05:30,600 --> 02:05:33,969 We do picnics, like, every weekend. 2271 02:05:34,069 --> 02:05:37,006 Lots of gluten-free sandwiches. 2272 02:05:37,106 --> 02:05:38,408 (chuckles) 2273 02:05:40,644 --> 02:05:43,078 It's helped them a lot, actually. 2274 02:05:44,213 --> 02:05:45,615 Having this. 2275 02:05:51,655 --> 02:05:53,390 What I did... 2276 02:05:55,090 --> 02:05:57,026 ...I can't even... 2277 02:06:00,963 --> 02:06:04,300 It's the worst thing anyone can do. 2278 02:06:09,906 --> 02:06:11,273 (sighs) 2279 02:06:11,374 --> 02:06:13,577 I wish we could have met now. 2280 02:06:15,378 --> 02:06:17,246 Today. 2281 02:06:17,347 --> 02:06:19,316 For the first time. 2282 02:06:20,082 --> 02:06:22,586 Me, too. 2283 02:06:26,890 --> 02:06:27,958 I should probably... 2284 02:06:28,057 --> 02:06:29,559 Yeah. Yeah, of course. 2285 02:06:29,659 --> 02:06:31,561 Of course. 2286 02:06:33,930 --> 02:06:35,665 Hey, can I just... 2287 02:06:36,700 --> 02:06:38,735 Can I just ask you... 2288 02:06:40,437 --> 02:06:42,372 Why did you want to meet here? 2289 02:06:45,140 --> 02:06:46,710 (sighs) 2290 02:06:48,411 --> 02:06:51,180 I wanted to be sure that you saw this. 2291 02:06:55,385 --> 02:06:58,153 He really loved it here. 2292 02:07:09,900 --> 02:07:12,134 ♪ ♪ 2293 02:07:13,737 --> 02:07:16,071 EVAN: Dear Evan Hansen... 2294 02:07:17,206 --> 02:07:20,844 ...today is gonna be a good day, and here's why. 2295 02:07:21,845 --> 02:07:25,882 Because today, no matter what else, 2296 02:07:25,982 --> 02:07:28,351 today at least you're you. 2297 02:07:28,451 --> 02:07:30,020 No hiding, no lying. 2298 02:07:30,119 --> 02:07:32,087 And that's... 2299 02:07:32,187 --> 02:07:33,557 that's enough. 2300 02:07:33,657 --> 02:07:36,793 So no matter how hard it gets, 2301 02:07:36,893 --> 02:07:40,830 even if it feels... impossible, 2302 02:07:40,931 --> 02:07:42,832 this time you'll know. 2303 02:07:43,967 --> 02:07:46,135 Don't let go. 2304 02:07:46,235 --> 02:07:49,806 Just hold on and keep going. 2305 02:07:51,641 --> 02:07:53,043 Just keep going. 2306 02:07:53,142 --> 02:07:55,378 ♪ ♪ 2307 02:07:57,781 --> 02:08:06,756 ♪ Today, today ♪ 2308 02:08:06,856 --> 02:08:08,425 ♪ Today ♪ 2309 02:08:12,161 --> 02:08:19,134 ♪ It feels a little closer. ♪ 2310 02:08:21,905 --> 02:08:24,139 ♪ ♪ 2311 02:08:46,161 --> 02:08:48,398 (music fades) 2312 02:08:52,068 --> 02:08:55,505 ("You Will Be Found" by Sam Smith and Summer Walker plays) 2313 02:09:06,049 --> 02:09:10,620 ♪ Have you ever felt like nobody was there? ♪ 2314 02:09:12,122 --> 02:09:18,028 ♪ Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere? ♪ 2315 02:09:18,128 --> 02:09:22,932 ♪ Have you ever felt like you could disappear? ♪ 2316 02:09:24,067 --> 02:09:26,603 ♪ Like you could fall ♪ 2317 02:09:26,703 --> 02:09:29,406 ♪ And no one would hear? ♪ 2318 02:09:30,507 --> 02:09:34,811 ♪ Well, let that lonely feeling wash away ♪ 2319 02:09:36,780 --> 02:09:42,217 ♪ Maybe there's a reason to believe you'll be okay ♪ 2320 02:09:42,318 --> 02:09:47,357 ♪ 'Cause when you don't feel strong enough to stand ♪ 2321 02:09:48,458 --> 02:09:50,593 ♪ You can reach ♪ 2322 02:09:50,694 --> 02:09:54,030 ♪ Reach out your hand ♪ 2323 02:09:54,130 --> 02:10:00,003 ♪ And, oh, someone will come running ♪ 2324 02:10:00,103 --> 02:10:07,377 ♪ And I know they'll take you home ♪ 2325 02:10:07,477 --> 02:10:10,380 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 2326 02:10:10,480 --> 02:10:13,516 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 2327 02:10:13,616 --> 02:10:17,087 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 2328 02:10:17,187 --> 02:10:19,556 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2329 02:10:19,656 --> 02:10:22,125 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 2330 02:10:22,224 --> 02:10:25,695 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 2331 02:10:25,795 --> 02:10:29,065 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 2332 02:10:29,165 --> 02:10:34,471 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2333 02:10:35,237 --> 02:10:40,343 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2334 02:10:42,212 --> 02:10:47,217 ♪ There's a place where we don't have to feel unknown ♪ 2335 02:10:47,317 --> 02:10:48,718 (choir vocalizing) 2336 02:10:48,818 --> 02:10:51,387 ♪ And every time you call out ♪ 2337 02:10:51,488 --> 02:10:54,791 ♪ You're a little less alone ♪ 2338 02:10:54,891 --> 02:10:59,529 ♪ Oh, if you only say the word ♪ 2339 02:10:59,629 --> 02:11:03,733 ♪ Oh, from across the silence ♪ 2340 02:11:03,833 --> 02:11:08,805 ♪ Your voice is heard ♪ 2341 02:11:08,905 --> 02:11:11,875 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 2342 02:11:11,975 --> 02:11:15,011 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 2343 02:11:15,111 --> 02:11:18,581 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 2344 02:11:18,681 --> 02:11:21,017 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2345 02:11:21,117 --> 02:11:23,653 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 2346 02:11:23,753 --> 02:11:27,357 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 2347 02:11:27,457 --> 02:11:30,660 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 2348 02:11:30,760 --> 02:11:33,696 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2349 02:11:33,797 --> 02:11:42,639 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 2350 02:11:42,739 --> 02:11:45,708 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2351 02:11:45,809 --> 02:11:53,383 ♪ You will be found, you will be found ♪ 2352 02:11:53,483 --> 02:11:56,252 (choir vocalizing) 2353 02:11:56,352 --> 02:11:58,822 ♪ Out of the shadows ♪ 2354 02:11:58,922 --> 02:12:01,558 ♪ The morning is breaking ♪ 2355 02:12:01,658 --> 02:12:07,997 ♪ And all is new and all is new ♪ 2356 02:12:08,097 --> 02:12:11,167 ♪ It's filling up the empty ♪ 2357 02:12:11,267 --> 02:12:13,469 ♪ And suddenly I see ♪ 2358 02:12:13,570 --> 02:12:16,739 ♪ That all is new ♪ 2359 02:12:16,840 --> 02:12:20,944 ♪ All is new ♪ 2360 02:12:21,044 --> 02:12:24,147 ♪ Even when the dark comes crashing through ♪ 2361 02:12:24,247 --> 02:12:27,517 ♪ When you need a friend to carry you ♪ 2362 02:12:27,617 --> 02:12:31,221 ♪ And when you're broken on the ground ♪ 2363 02:12:31,322 --> 02:12:33,756 ♪ You will be found ♪ 2364 02:12:33,857 --> 02:12:36,693 ♪ So let the sun come streaming in ♪ 2365 02:12:36,793 --> 02:12:40,363 ♪ 'Cause you'll reach up and you'll rise again ♪ 2366 02:12:40,463 --> 02:12:43,800 ♪ Lift your head and look around ♪ 2367 02:12:43,900 --> 02:12:49,372 ♪ You will be found. ♪ 2368 02:12:52,976 --> 02:12:55,011 (song ends) 2369 02:12:56,212 --> 02:12:59,649 ("The Anonymous Ones" by SZA playing) 2370 02:13:06,089 --> 02:13:08,091 ♪ Ever look at all the people ♪ 2371 02:13:08,191 --> 02:13:11,261 ♪ Seem to know exactly how to be? ♪ 2372 02:13:11,362 --> 02:13:14,898 ♪ How to be, how to be now, how to be ♪ 2373 02:13:14,998 --> 02:13:18,768 ♪ You think, they don't need piles of prescriptions ♪ 2374 02:13:18,868 --> 02:13:21,437 ♪ To function naturally ♪ 2375 02:13:21,537 --> 02:13:25,174 ♪ Functioning natural ♪ 2376 02:13:25,275 --> 02:13:28,611 ♪ Take a look and you might just catch it ♪ 2377 02:13:28,711 --> 02:13:30,546 ♪ Stay a minute more ♪ 2378 02:13:30,647 --> 02:13:33,950 ♪ Minute more, minute more now, minute more ♪ 2379 02:13:34,050 --> 02:13:38,221 ♪ There's a little moment after the sunny smile ♪ 2380 02:13:38,322 --> 02:13:40,189 ♪ Their eyes fall to the floor ♪ 2381 02:13:40,290 --> 02:13:43,493 ♪ To the floor, to the floor now, to the floor ♪ 2382 02:13:43,593 --> 02:13:46,863 ♪ The truth starts peeking through ♪ 2383 02:13:46,963 --> 02:13:48,332 ♪ Peeking through ♪ 2384 02:13:48,431 --> 02:13:52,869 ♪ They're a lot like me and you ♪ 2385 02:13:52,969 --> 02:13:58,141 ♪ They can fake a smile, too ♪ 2386 02:14:00,743 --> 02:14:03,112 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 2387 02:14:03,212 --> 02:14:06,649 ♪ Never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 2388 02:14:06,749 --> 02:14:09,852 ♪ They carry, they carry, they carry ♪ 2389 02:14:09,953 --> 02:14:12,922 ♪ All those anonymous ones ♪ 2390 02:14:13,022 --> 02:14:16,192 ♪ Never name the quiet pain they bury ♪ 2391 02:14:16,292 --> 02:14:20,163 ♪ They bury, they bury, they bury ♪ 2392 02:14:20,263 --> 02:14:24,267 ♪ Keep on keeping secrets that they think they have to hide ♪ 2393 02:14:24,368 --> 02:14:29,105 ♪ What if everybody's secret is they have that secret side? ♪ 2394 02:14:29,205 --> 02:14:33,476 ♪ And to know, to know we're not alone ♪ 2395 02:14:33,576 --> 02:14:36,179 ♪ Is all we're hoping for ♪ 2396 02:14:37,146 --> 02:14:39,515 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous ♪ 2397 02:14:39,615 --> 02:14:41,918 ♪ Why you gotta be anonymous? ♪ 2398 02:14:42,018 --> 02:14:45,621 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous anymore ♪ 2399 02:14:53,196 --> 02:14:56,733 ♪ Anymore ♪ 2400 02:15:03,706 --> 02:15:05,975 ♪ Spot the girl who stays in motion ♪ 2401 02:15:06,075 --> 02:15:09,313 ♪ Spins so fast so she won't fall ♪ 2402 02:15:09,413 --> 02:15:13,182 ♪ World spins so fast, spins so fast ♪ 2403 02:15:13,282 --> 02:15:15,618 ♪ She's built a wall of her achievements ♪ 2404 02:15:15,718 --> 02:15:17,253 ♪ Keep out the question ♪ 2405 02:15:17,354 --> 02:15:22,025 ♪ Without it, is she worth anything at all? ♪ 2406 02:15:22,125 --> 02:15:26,629 ♪ And truth starts peeking through ♪ 2407 02:15:26,729 --> 02:15:31,502 ♪ They're a lot like me and you ♪ 2408 02:15:31,601 --> 02:15:36,773 ♪ They can fake a smile, too ♪ 2409 02:15:39,476 --> 02:15:41,778 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 2410 02:15:41,878 --> 02:15:45,048 ♪ Never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 2411 02:15:45,148 --> 02:15:48,419 ♪ They carry, they carry, they carry ♪ 2412 02:15:48,519 --> 02:15:51,355 ♪ All those anonymous ones ♪ 2413 02:15:51,455 --> 02:15:54,525 ♪ Never name the quiet pain they bury ♪ 2414 02:15:54,624 --> 02:15:58,728 ♪ They bury, they bury, they bury ♪ 2415 02:15:58,828 --> 02:16:01,064 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous ♪ 2416 02:16:01,164 --> 02:16:03,699 ♪ Why you gotta be anonymous? ♪ 2417 02:16:03,800 --> 02:16:05,568 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous anymore ♪ 2418 02:16:05,668 --> 02:16:08,071 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 2419 02:16:08,171 --> 02:16:10,374 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 2420 02:16:10,474 --> 02:16:12,909 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 2421 02:16:13,009 --> 02:16:15,178 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 2422 02:16:15,278 --> 02:16:17,481 ♪ The parts we can't tell, we carry them well ♪ 2423 02:16:17,580 --> 02:16:22,519 ♪ But that doesn't mean they're not heavy ♪ 2424 02:16:22,618 --> 02:16:24,887 ♪ Heavy ♪ 2425 02:16:24,987 --> 02:16:27,357 ♪ The anonymous ones ♪ 2426 02:16:27,458 --> 02:16:30,860 ♪ Never let you see the ache they carry ♪ 2427 02:16:30,960 --> 02:16:34,030 ♪ They carry, they carry, they carry ♪ 2428 02:16:34,130 --> 02:16:37,066 ♪ All the anonymous ones ♪ 2429 02:16:37,166 --> 02:16:42,605 ♪ Never name the quiet pain they bury ♪ 2430 02:16:44,341 --> 02:16:48,545 ♪ Keep on keeping secrets that they think they have to hide ♪ 2431 02:16:48,644 --> 02:16:53,249 ♪ What if everybody's secret is they have that secret side? ♪ 2432 02:16:53,350 --> 02:16:57,454 ♪ And to know, to know we're not alone ♪ 2433 02:16:57,554 --> 02:17:01,090 ♪ Is all we're hoping for ♪ 2434 02:17:01,190 --> 02:17:03,594 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous ♪ 2435 02:17:03,693 --> 02:17:06,028 ♪ Why you gotta be anonymous? ♪ 2436 02:17:06,129 --> 02:17:10,166 ♪ I don't wanna be anonymous anymore. ♪ 2437 02:17:10,266 --> 02:17:12,301 (song ends) 2438 02:17:12,375 --> 02:17:15,180 Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull 176520