All language subtitles for Adele.One.Night.Only.2021.1080p.WEB.H264-BIGDOC

Good evening, everyone.
I'm Oprah Winfrey.

Welcome to a spectacular
night here at

the Griffith Observatory
in Los Angeles.

Tonight you have
a front-row seat

to a very special one-night-
only concert with Adele.

She's singing all the songs
I know you want to hear,

and new songs we've all
been waiting six years for.

And throughout the night,

you'll see my conversation
with Adele was so much fun.

She's as real, as down to earth
as we all believe she is.

But right now it is
my great delight to introduce

the 15-time
Grammy-winning icon, Adele!

-Hello. Okay.
-Hello. Okay. Hi.

-This is so good.
-Oh. Yes.

-Hello.
-Hi.

No. Hi. We can't even

-say hello anymore.
-Hi. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't really say hello
anymore. That's why.

-You don't?
-Not really.

'Cause it's like a joke.

Okay, well, hi, Adele.

-Hiya.
-Hiya.

Welcome to my rose garden.

- It's lovely,
it's beautiful.
- Well,

thank you
for coming to join me here.

It feels very British.

- Does it?
- Yes.

Well, actually because yes,

-and because
my tea house is here.
-Yes.

Everybody, we just met.

-Mm-hmm.
-And the concert tonight
is a celebration

of your biggest hits
and the debut of the new songs

-from 30.
-Yes.

-And you start with "Hello."
-Yes. Well, I think

I'm always going to have
to start with "Hello."

I think it'd be weird if it was,
like, halfway through a set.

You know? So yeah,
I'm starting with it.

Okay, so that music video
has been viewed nearly

-3 billion times.
-3 billion?

-3 billion times!
-Oh, I didn't know that.

-Billion, that's insane.
-Yeah.

That song means so much to
people all around the world.

It does, yeah.

So, what does it represent
to you?

Well, the show is the
first time that I'll, you know,

that I'm singing it
from where I am now.

-Yes.
-Which I think is great.

Um, the song to me
was the beginning of me

trying to find myself
and I haven't figured out yet

what it was that I had
to do for that.

But when I wrote it,
it was a real ode to, like,

little me, older me.

Like, all of these things,
like, you know, so,

it's just a song about, like,

I'm still here.

You know, sort of like, "Hi,
I'm still here. I still exist,

like, you know,
in every aspect of my life."

Well, it feels like that on 30,

you have literally opened up
your soul in a way that

even though we have
heard your pain before,

it feels like pain was almost
like a muse for you for this.

I read something you said--
you said,

"I was singing things
I didn't even realize

-I was feeling or thinking."
-Mm-hmm.

So, is that how
the music comes to you?

-Is that a part of your process?
-Yeah.

Is the music as catharsis?

Yeah, it definitely
channels from somewhere else.

You know, when I'm singing
and when I'm writing, like...

And I was kind of aware
of that on the other albums,

but this one, you know,
a lot more

I-I felt it because everything
was happening in real time.

I was writing my album,
you know, while I was

-going through everything.
-Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

But I don't think as a person
I have what my singing has.

-What do you mean?
-I just think there's-there's

something I'm pulling from
somewhere else.

I don't, I don't have some--
you know, something else

from underneath.
I don't know what it is.

It's coming up through me
but it's not...

I don't know how I access it.
It's wild 'cause

I don't think I'm that deep
in real life.

-So it's...
-But then you listen
to the music

-and you think deep, right?
-Yeah. Yeah,

you know,
or I'll just be like,

"I am making progress,"
or like, just...

It's-it's a revelation
to me, the songs.

Well, I read something
that you said--

you said, "I'm not shy
or embarrassed

to be falling apart."

That's one of the reasons why
you feel people are so connected

to your music and I wondered,
what gives you...

the-the freedom actually
and the courage to be able to

fall apart and expose yourself
in a world and a culture now

-that is a "gotcha" culture...
-Yeah, absolutely.

...that if you make the wrong
move, you say the wrong thing...

-Yeah.
-...somebody's got some,
you know, wisecrack about it.

I think the reason
I'm so brave to do it, you know,

in my career so far was because,
again, music helped me

in any situations
and I would like to do,

you know, the same for people

that feel so alone when
they're feeling something.

Mm-hmm.

To be reminded that
they're not alone.

And in terms of now,
you know, there were moments

when I was writing the record or

I would listen back to something
and be like,

"That might be a bit
too private.

"That might be a bit too,
you know,

too about myself and stuff
to put out,"

but nothing is as scary as what
I've been through

over the last two, three years
behind closed doors.

So I'm not frightened about...

about what people may or
might not do now, you know.

Hi, guys.

How posh is this?

Also, get you, Lizzo.

You think you can
outshine me, babes?

I love that,
I love that poncho coat.

Oh, yeah. Nice.

Um, hi, everyone.

Thank you so much
for coming tonight.

Welcome to "One Night Only"
with me.

Although most of you I know,
and you have

too many nights with me, really.

Um, but I wanted to feel safe

in my first little
comeback thing.

Hang on, I got dry mouth.

So I wanted to do a mixture
of people that I know and love.

People that I've met
a few times,

and some of you I don't know
at all. But hi.

And I'm gonna do some
old ones for you.

I'm gonna do some
new ones for you.

So I haven't sung this.
This is a new song.

I haven't sung this song yet
for anyone.

Um, not in real life.

I'm myself.

Not gonna lie.

Um, so I could use your help
if any of you know it.

This is "Easy on Me."

Thank you.

You lost a hundred pounds
in two years.

And then you said it wasn't
even really about the weight.

-No.
-So what was it about?

So here's the thing.

You write about it in
song after song.

You start with, you know,

"Easy on Me"
that-that's been released.

Can you just give us
an idea of what happened

with this all-consuming--

it feels like
an all-consuming pain

and I'm like,
"What the hell happened?"

I've been obsessed with
the nuclear family

my whole life because
I never came from one.

You know, it's in all these
movies and all these books,

like, you know, and you grow up
reading them like that's what

-it should be, like, you know.
-Right.

And... I just
from a very young age,

just, you know, promised myself
that when I had kids

that we'd stay together,
we would be that united family

-and...
-Ah...

And I tried for a really,
really long time

and then, um,

I was just so disappointed
for my son.

I was so disappointed
for myself.

And I was just,
I thought I was going to

be the one that, you know,

stopped doing those bloody
patterns all the time.

So, do you call this--
is this the divorce album?

I think I'm divorcing myself
on it.

-Yeah?
-Yeah.

How does one do that?

So, it's lonely, you know.

I spent a lot of time on my own,

really sitting in my feelings
and not keeping myself busy.

I used to always--
if a feeling came up,

I'd distract myself
or I'd call a friend,

and be like,
"Do you wanna go out?

-What do you wanna do?"
-Yeah.

Put a movie on or whatever.
I would just sit with it.

-I would just eat it myself.
-Yeah, no, absolutely,

but I would just, I would just

whenever I noticed
how I was feeling, I would

sit down and I would sit in it.

Um, I stopped drinking.

That's one great way of,
um, of really sort of getting

to know yourself is being,
you know,

just drinking water
and being sober as anything.

But you've had a fascinating
relationship with alcohol.

-Mm-hmm. Yeah.
-I read where you said that

alcohol really fascinated you.

Yeah. Yeah, very much.

Yeah, 'cause it took
my dad from me.

-Yeah.
-Yeah, and then you stopped.

Well, when I was going through
everything a couple years ago

when I was going through
my divorce, yes.

Um, not at the beginning.
At first I-- whew, no.

I think I probably kept
the alcohol industry alive.

But you know, after--
once I realized that I had

a lot of work to do on myself,

yeah, I stopped drinking and I

started working out lots
and stuff like that

to keep me sort of centered.

Was there a moment
when you knew?

Or was it a series of things
that you said,

"Can't do this anymore"?

With my-my journey or in...?

With the divorce from Simon.
Like,

because I-I, you know,

over the years I've interviewed
so many people who stayed,

were miserable, were miserable,

and years before they
actually made the move...

-Yeah.
-...had started
thinking about it,

so I'm wondering, was there
a single moment or was...

I do remember one of my friends,

we were all-- we were
answering these questions

-in this very bougie magazine.
-Mm-hmm.

And it was,

it was something like,
"What's something that

no one would ever know
about you?"

And I just said it in front of
three of my friends.

I was like,
"I'm really not happy.

"I'm not, I'm not living.

I'm just plodding along."

And I remember there was a lyric

that I wrote that
I put on a song on-on 25,

which was, "I want to live
and not just survive."

-Mm-hmm.
-And, um,

you know, I've definitely
felt like that,

but it was when I, when
I admitted to my own friends,

who thought I was really happy,

that actually I'm really
unhappy, and they all gasped.

Like, you know, I feel like it

was sort of from there
that I was like,

"What am I doing?
What am I doing it for?"

You know?
But I think it was just,

by us getting married,
us having our wedding,

and I-- you know, I take
marriage very seriously.

-Like, it obviously
seems like...
-Yeah, 'cause you have

-all that stuff from the past.
-Yeah, and it seems
like I don't,

you know, now-- like, you know,
almost like I disrespected it

by-by getting married,
and then, you know,

divorced so quickly
and stuff like that.

But I think...

Are embarrassed because it
was so quickly?

I'm just embarrassed that
I didn't make my marriage work.

-Okay.
-You know?

So now that you have perspective

and you've opened up your soul

and shared it with the world
here on 30,

why do you think

is the real reason Simon came
into your life?

I think Simon probably saved
my life, to be honest with you.

He came at such a moment,

where the stability that
him and Angelo have given me,

no one else would ever have
been able to give me,

like, especially at that time
in my life-- I was so young

and I just, I think I would have
got a bit lost in all of it.

Like, you know,
and I think I probably,

I could have easily gone down
some dodgy paths,

like, you know?

And sort of self-destructed
from-from

sort of like being so
overwhelmed by all of it.

And he-he came in
and was stable.

The most stable person I've ever

had in my life up
until that point.

Even-- you know, even now
I trust him with my life.

-Really?
-Oh, my gosh, like beyond.

Like, yeah, I feel like...

Yeah, him and Angelo,
like, they were

angels sent to me,
that's how I feel.

-So, came into your life...
-Mm-hmm.

...at the right season
and for the right reasons.

-To save you.
-Yes, absolutely, yeah.

And in that moment when
Angelo said to you,

"Why don't
you love Daddy anymore?"

Yeah, that was really hard
as well, and trying to explain

to, like, a six-year-old
at the time, obviously,

um, that I do love him,
I'm just not in love with him.

Makes absolutely no sense
to a six-year-old.

Like, you know?

So there were so many answers
I just

couldn't give him
'cause there aren't any really.

Like, you know,
that he would understand,

but he sees
that I still love his dad.

-Like, you know...
-'Cause you live across
the street from each other.

We live across the street from
each other. Like, we, like,

we're away together sometimes,
like, you know, and, um, and...

Yeah, like, me and Simon also
chat away without Angelo.

Like, Angelo, you know,
could be at school and...

So you're still friends?

-Oh, yes.
-It's all...

-100%. Yeah, yeah.
-100%.

I respect him more than anyone.

How does he feel about...

this album and the story
of the two of you

-coming through your music?
-Yeah.

I mean, we don't sit around
and talk about it

like, "How you feeling?"
Like, you know,

"Easy on Me" is at 40 million
streams, how are you feeling?

Like... we don't talk about it.

But, um, he knows I'm,
you know, he knows

what kind of artist I am, like,

and, you know, that I got to--

I have to dig deep
and tell my stories.

This next one is
a golden oldie, I would say.

And, um, yeah,
it's the first time

I've sung it
in public since, um,

since everything went down.
All right.

You ready? Ready, Eric?

Coming up, Adele
organizes a special surprise.

I need every single person
to be really bloody quiet.

All right?

Thank you very much.

You know, um...

this is the first time--
I got to perch like this

since I can't sit
in this mermaid dress.

I feel like my whole campaign
so far with my outfits

is a bit Death Becomes Her.

Sometimes I'm Hel
and sometimes I'm Mad, you know.

Anyway, this is the first time
that my son

has ever seen me perform.

And I got really--

Oh, and he dressed up for me.

It was-- I'm not gonna cry.
Anyway, it's too...

it's too soon to cry and I don't
want anyone to come fix my face.

But, um, it's the absolute
honor of my life, baby,

to have you here tonight.

And you look so beautiful,
and so handsome and smart.

So many women, Adele,

are going to be liberated,
I think,

by listening to you
because so many

women specifically
choose to stay on

in relationships when

they know it's not working,
and they do it for the kids.

And I've read where you said you
weren't miserablemiserable,

-but you also knew you
weren't happy.
-Yeah.

And so, you wanted to bring
a happy version

-of yourself to your son.
-Mm-hmm.

-Yes.
-Which I think is about

the best gift anybody
can give to their children.

I think, I think
it's the same as,

you know, the same drive
as staying in a relationship

even though you're not happy
and you do it for the kids,

I think it's as loving

as doing that for the kids
by leaving

and-and, you know,
finding your own happiness

so that they really know
who you are.

But I'm still not fully over it,

of me choosing to dismantle
my child's life

-for my own...
-Mm-hmm.

...makes me very uncomfortable.

You still feel guilt?

I don't feel guilt,
I just feel...

somewhat selfish sometimes,
but, like, I-I know that

I'm-I'm nearing my goal
of, like,

finding my happiness,
like, you know.

And it's been--
no one ever makes me

do anything I don't want
and it was just like--

but I was really
ignoring myself.

-Yeah.
-For a long time,
which was wild to me

when I realized it;
and I knew

that as an adult,
Angelo would be livid

-with me for doing that.
-Mm-hmm.

I knew that when
he became an adult,

that he'd be furious at me
and I didn't want that, either.

But it was, it was,
it was hard work.

So, this whole album
is dedicated to him.

Yes. Yeah, and the whole album

is not about him, it's about me.

And I just wanted for him
to hear me

talking mad-- madly deeply,

about who I am and how I feel,
like, you know.

And I don't know if I'd ever be
able to have that conversation

with him in real life,
so therefore he can go

and listen to it.

Well, everything on the album
is certainly a starter

for a great conversation.

So, does Angelo know that
you are Adele?

No, apart from the other day,

he watched
the "Easy on Me" video--

like countdown
to when it premiered.

-Yeah.
-Wherever, whatever.
I didn't watch that.

And, um, he was like,
"There was, like,

150,000 people waiting,"
and, like, blah-blah-blah.

And he was like,
"You had all these likes."

And then he read
the comments and then...

he was like,
"People really like you."

Like, so he's-he's starting...

-Starting to get it?
-...to get it a little bit,

-but not really.
-Didn't you take him

to a Taylor Swift concert
and he was like...

He loved it.

He couldn't believe that
all those people were in there?

Yeah, because he used to come
to my stadium shows

for my rehearsals
and it would be empty.

He was like, "So many people
come to her shows."

But I'd make him leave
before they all arrive.

It was so cute and so funny;
he loved it, yeah.

-He's never seen you
perform live?
-No.

-No, this will be
his first time.
-Wow.

-Yeah.
-Yes. Do you
want more children?

I'm-I'm definitely open to it.

I would like more children.
It wouldn't be the end

of the world
if I don't have them,

'cause I have Angelo,
but yeah, I think so.

Every mother and father has
a dream for their children.

And even when you have a big,
accessed life as you do,

and can give your children
any dreams that

-they can imagine...
-Yeah.

...actually I think

it's more challenging
to raise children

who are kind
and have their own ambition...

-Yeah. Absolutely.
-...when they have you.

So, what is the dream
you hold for him?

Just to be a good person,
be a good and happy person.

That's it.
I don't expect anything of him.

I don't care what his career is,
as long as he's passionate about

whatever it is that he does
and that he's happy.

So now this is the big surprise
and I'm very, very excited.

I hope we can pull it off.

So, tonight we've arranged...

I'm a bit nervous in case
it doesn't go well.

It's also a bit ironic
that I'm-- that I'm

letting this happen tonight.
We've arranged a surprise

for a lovely guy called Quentin,

who reached out to a, now,
fake show asking for some help,

so... whew,
make me all nervous.

Quentin has been
with his girlfriend Ashley

for seven years.

Seven years is, like,
normally like, you know,

you either say yes or you say no
to, like, life together.

Seven-year itch.

She's a chef--
she's a vegan chef.

She's always at work,
but tonight Quentin told Ashley

that they were having
a date night and so

we're going to make
that date night really,

really memorable.
So now, earlier today

Ashley and Quentin
were picked up in a car.

And they came to this park,
to Griffith Park,

and at the bottom of the hill
down there they've been

having a beautiful picnic
pretty much all day.

Quentin told Ashley that he's
planned a small surprise to

celebrate the fact that she just
got her first big catering job.

Also, I love a surprise.

Also love dress-up.
Right, so she--

blindfolded her--
bit kinky but you know--

and he's given her
noise-canceling headphones

so that she can't hear what
we've been doing up here,

this concert tonight.

And even though
they're in the area,

she has absolutely no idea
where she is

or where she's going, so...

I need every single person
to be really bloody quiet.

All right?

Let's turn the lights down.
If you, if you

make a noise,
I'm going to kill you.

Turn the lights down.

Turn the lights down.

What are we doing, Quentin?

- All right, listen.
- Okay.

Take the blindfold off, okay?

When you squeeze my hand?

-Yes.
-Am I on grass?

-Shh.
-Oh, shoot.

Quentin...

Take it off? Take it off?

-Oh...
-Babe, look at me.

Look at me, look at me,
look at me, look at me.

-Look at me.
-Oh, my God.

Look at me.

Listen.

-First of all... Listen.
-What are you doing?

Listen, I want to
say thank you, okay?

What are you doing?

I want to thank you
for being so patient

-with me.
-Oh, Quentin Brunson...

Listen, thank you
for being patient with me.

Um...

-You're crazy, man.
-I am extremely proud of you.

And, I mean, every day
you blow my mind.

Oh, my God.
Where are we?

There's absolutely nothing
that you cannot do.

And I just know
that you're going to be

an amazing mother
to our kids one day.

And, um...

-And I love you.
-Is this real?

I love you. I love you.

I love you.
And I will continue to love you

forever. Ashley...

Am I awake?

-Who are these people?
-This is real. This is real.

-Oh, my God.
-Ashley.

-All right.
-It's been...

Thank God you didn't let me eat.
I would have thrown up.

This has been
a long time coming.

Oh, my God, I've been
your girlfriend for so long.

Well, babe...

-Oh, my God.
-Will-- Okay.

Oh, my God.

Will you marry me,
little Ashley?

-In real life?
-In real life.

-Yeah.
-Yes?

Oy, oy!

Hello, Ashley. Hi.

Hi, Quentin. You all right?

Go sit front row. Go...
go sit down and enjoy the show.

Am I alive?

Thank God she said yes,
'cause I didn't know

who I was going to have to
sing this song to next,

you or him.

Oh, my God, look at her--

she's so in shock.

Ha ha!

Oh, that was lovely--
a little cry.

Okay...

All right, here we go.
This is for you two.

She's cryin' her eyes out.

Congratulations.

How do you start dating again?

I mean, you can't go on
a dating app. Do you, like...

-No.
-...take advice from friends

or somebody says,
"Oh, I know somebody"?

Let's go to the question
everybody wants to know.

-Oh.
-One of the questions

certainly is this whole
weight thing.

-Mm-hmm.
-And you lost

-a hundred pounds in two years.
-Around that, yeah.

-Around that?
A hundred pounds in two years.
-Around, yeah.

And then you said it wasn't
even really about the weight.

-No.
-So what was it about?

It was about my anxiety mainly.

I had the most terrifying
anxiety attacks

after I left my marriage.

They'd paralyze me completely

and made me so confused
because I wouldn't be

able to have any control
over my body.

But I knew that I-I was aware
of it all happening.

It was like I was still
very much there

while my whole body was just,
like, on another planet

it felt like, you know?

And I've always
worked out a bit.

You know, a couple times
a week for my back.

-Not very hard. But you know.
-Uh-huh.

'Cause I've had a bad back
since I was a teenager.

And I started to notice
A] how much I trusted

my trainer and his,
like, presence

when I was feeling so lost,
but also that I didn't have

any anxiety when I was
with him at the gym.

So then I-I picked it up
every day and then

I had nothing else to do,
and I think

it was just, it became my time.

Me having a plan every day
when I had no plans.

I had no idea what each day
was going to bring

for me but me knowing that,

okay, at 9:00 a.m.,
I'm gonna go to the gym.

Okay, great. Well,
that gives me some discipline.

Okay, 1:00 p.m. I'm going
to go for a hike.

You know, having these
sort of pins in my day

-helped me keep myself together.
-So you weren't even

starting out
trying to lose weight?

No, not at all.

I wasn't bothered
about that at all but...

in that process of having, you
know, lost all of that weight,

I definitely
really contributed towards

me getting my mind right,
you know.

-It did.
-And giving me the-- absolutely.

It sharpened everything.

Without a shadow of a doubt.

Like, it gave me real purpose.

Interesting, because you know,
I-I've been through this a few

times myself and I remember
the first time I dropped,

you know, a lot of weight--
I think it was like 67 pounds--

people were really upset
and had stuff to say.

And it actually in many ways
felt like I had abandoned them

-or something.
-Mm-hmm. Yeah.

And lots of people
are talking about your weight

and all in your business
about it.

-Yeah.
-And I want to know,

what is the experience
of losing this

been like for you and also
people's reaction to it?

I'm not shocked or even
fazed by it because

my body has been objectified
my entire career.

I'm either too big,
I'm either too small.

Like, you know, I'm either
hot or I'm either not--

like, whatever.
I never looked up to anyone

because of their body.

You know, I never admired
anyone because they had

the same hair color as me
or the same style as me.

-Or, you know, whatever, so...
-Or were the same weight as you.

Never. Never, ever, ever.

And when you were heavier,
you were fine.

I was and I was
body positive then

and I'm body positive now.

But it's not my job to
validate how people feel

-about their bodies.
-Whoo.

And I feel bad that, you know,
it's made anyone feel

horrible about themselves,
but I--

that's not my job
and I-I can't...

I'm trying to sort
my own life out.

You know, I can't...

I can't add another worry and
another thing to try and nail.

-I can't, like, you know?
-Okay.

-And...
-I got that, I love that.

-Yeah.
-I love that. I love that.

And, you know, my-my weight
might fluctuate

now that I can't work out as
much and I'm on set all day.

You know, I mean, I'm eating.

But I don't care if
I put on weight.

I don't care if I lose it again.
Like, it's not about that.

As long as, like,
my muscle memory doesn't go

for when I'm lifting my weights,
which is,

like my favorite place to be.

-Lifting weights? Okay.
-I love it.

-I love it. I love it.
-What's the highest
weight you can press now?

Well, at the moment,
my back's been bad,

but last summer when
I was at my--

I was at my peak
of being able to like--

I felt like I could
have been in the Olympics.

I remember saying to my trainers
all the time, "I'm gonna get,

I'm gonna get an Olympic
gold medal next."

I was like, you know.

It was-- we were getting to,
like, on a deadlift,

we were getting up to,
like, 160, 170.

Yeah, I love it.

But it started out
at ten pounds.

It started at ten pounds when
I first started lifting.

I am... Wow.

Oh, no, I'm--
I'm an athlete.

I'm actually an athlete.
Like, I'm not even boasting.

Even the proportions of my body.

I should have been an athlete,
if only at school

hadn't discovered boys
and someone had told me

to go and do a bit more P.E.

Wow. 160, wow.

Yeah. I love it.

But I have to eat
quite a lot of food

to lift the weights I lift.

-So you eat?
-I eat.

-Oh, yeah.
-What you want to eat?

-I had Chinese last night.
-Okay.

Yeah, we found the best
McDonald's recently.

It's piping hot every time.

No, I do. I love it.
I just, I'm not--

I ain't got much
of a sweet tooth though.

Yeah, I don't either.
Yeah, yeah.

I'd rather a sandwich.

Deadlifting 160, this girl.

-Yeah.
-She's an athlete.

I'm also a very good boxer.

I've got a left hook that
could kill you.

- Really?
- Oh, yeah.

-Yeah, I'm a very good boxer.
-I'd be scared.

Another new song on
the album is titled "Hold On."

The lyrics to this song
are so brutally honest.

Sounds like you were
in the dark,

-dark, dark hours there.
-Mm-hmm. Yeah.

"I swear to God," you say,

"I'm such a mess.

"The harder that I try,
I regress.

"I am my own worst enemy.

"Right now I truly hate
being me.

"Every day feels like the road
I'm on might just open up

"and swallow me whole.

"How do I feel so mighty small
when I'm struggling

to feel at all?"

-Mm.
-Girl, you can write.

Oh! Thank you.

-You can write.
-Thank you.

So what was going on there?
What was happening?

How did you keep the faith when
you were at your lowest point?

-What were you holding on to?
-My friends.

The question is,
what were you holding on to?

Um, my-my friends
always would say,

"hold on" when I would feel like

how I'm-- you know,
the lyrics in the verse.

-Mm-hmm.
-But it was just exhausting,

trying to... to-to,
like, keep going with it.

It's a process, you know;
the process

of-of a divorce;
the process of, you know,

being a single parent;
the process of not

seeing your child
every single day

wasn't really a plan that I had

when I, you know, when I,
when I became a mum;

um, the process of arriving for
yourself every single day,

turning up for yourself
every single day

and still running a home,
running a business.

Like, it's-it's, you know,
so many people

know what I'm talking about
and it can--

you know,
I feel like that as well.

I-I juggle those things as well.

And it just-- I felt like
not doing it anymore,

and also trying to, like,

move forward, like...

but, like, with intention,

not just trying to get out of it
for no reason.

It made my feet hurt, walking
through all of that concrete.

I never, I never questioned
whether I'd made a bad decision.

I never ever did,
which I'm very grateful for,

that I never asked myself
those questions.

But it was just like maybe it
would have been better

had I just kept my mouth shut,
you know, and carried on.

-Mm.
-You know, just in terms

of hurting two people
that I love

the most in the world, you know.

Whew.

Thank you.

I heard you. Thanks.

Coming up next...

All the therapy
you've done, you know

that certainly at this stage

that you end up,
until you can get it right--

this is what I say to
all my girls in school--

that whatever the biggest
wound of your life is

from your parents, that you
end up choosing relationships

to try to heal those wounds.

-Yeah.
-So what do you think
the deep wound

from the past,
from you as a little girl

growing up,
you're trying to heal as you

reach for your relationships
as an adult woman?

My dad's absolute lack
of presence and effort with me.

But you know, as I got older,

I definitely understood
that it was the alcohol.

It wasn't a choice that he was
necessarily making in himself

that he didn't want to
step up for me.

But when you're little,
you don't know that.

-Especially when he's like,
"I'm drinking juice."
-Yes.

So I'm like,
"Well, I drink juice."

Like, you know, you don't know
the sort of effects of it.

But yeah, like,
when someone that you

love so much, and the more
that you feel like

they don't love you,
you love them even more...

Like, I was definitely always
trying to fill that void.

But at the same time, I would
expect it to hurt at some point.

So I would hurt them first.

You know,
not in a malicious way.

It wasn't malicious,
it was just like I had

absolutely zero expectations
of anybody.

Because I never-- I learned not
to have them from my dad.

Because you'd been let down
so many times.

Yeah, so by having, you know,
zero expectations,

I wouldn't
arrive for them either.

Like, you know,
and I would feed off this energy

so they'd be like,
well, why would I, like...

like, make-- go beyond
and make that effort with you

when A] you don't seem
to want me to;

and B] you're not doing it.
Like, you know?

Um, so it was definitely...
definitely that.

And then during the-the,
you know,

the sort of the last two,
three years of my life,

my dad got really sick.

And it was interesting
that that...

happened during-- after,
just after having left

my marriage when I had already
made the conscious decision

to get to know myself
and figure some things out.

And... not-not-not
that long ago,

it was, um, back in April.

When he-- when my dad died

and we had our peace together,
I felt that...

that huge gaping hole fill,
like, you know?

-Really?
-Just, we-we-we forgave
each other.

'Cause, you know,
I said hurtful things.

I did-- I did nothing as bad
as what he did though,

to be honest with you.
Like, you know, if you add it

all up throughout my whole life.

But I definitely, like,
snapped in the press

and stuff like that at him,

which definitely hurt
his feelings, of course.

Um, but we
found our peace together.

And then...

You played the album for him.

Played the album too,
on Zoom, yeah. Yeah.

Was that healing
for both of you?

-Yeah.
-What did you learn from that?

When we met up
and when I heard he was ill,

um, I went to go
and see him in Wales,

and I wanted to play him
"To Be Loved."

My main goal in life is
to be loved and love,

you know, and so I wanted
to play it to my dad

being like, "You're the reason
I haven't done that yet."

'Cause he definitely was
the reason.

He was the reason I haven't
fully accessed what it is

to be, like, in a loving, loving
relationship with somebody.

-Like, 360, like, you know.
-Mm-hmm.

And he couldn't.

He was like, "I've only ever
heard 'Hometown Glory.'"

So I'm like, what? That's
the first song I ever wrote

when I was, like, 16.

And he was like, "It's
too painful," like, you know.

-He's never heard anything other
than "Hometown..."
-He would never listen.

He would switch it off
and he never ever

played any of my other music,
he said.

So I forced him to listen

and it's like we both cried
and stuff like that,

and then, um, so that--
him sort of really

understanding my child wound
through my song

was amazing for me.

And again, I think he
could listen to me sing it

but not say it. Yeah,
we're very similar like that.

And then when I played him
the album,

it was just, by then
he'd listened to all of 19,

all of 21,all of 25,
and my mum was helping to look

after him
towards the end as well.

And his favorites were
all of my favorites,

you know, which I thought
was amazing and...

he wished that he'd done
what I had been doing.

For myself, you know?
Like, the journey.

-Working on himself. Yeah.
The journey.
-Yeah. He wished he'd done it.

-Yeah.
-Yeah. And he was proud of me
for doing it, so it was,

it was very, very healing.
But when he died,

it was just, it was,
it literally, it was...

it was like the wound closed up.

And I've been so open, you know.

Didn't your therapist
at one point

say you need to sit with
a seven-year-old Adele?

-Yeah.
-And when you did that, sat with

the seven-year-old Adele...

-Yeah.
-What did you find?

Um...

A very sad little girl.

Mm.

No! You're trying
to make me cry.

No, I'm not. No, I'm not.

No, yeah, it was.
It was.

She was sad but also,
you know,

she was willing, willing.

-Willing to get out and run.
-Look at what she did.

-Look at what she did.
-I said I wouldn't
stay in there.

-Yeah.
-I said that when I was little.

-Look at what she did.
-I was like,

"I'm not staying here. This is
not what-- this life is--

"I'm in the wrong place.
I've been sent-- I've been,

you know,
sent to the wrong place."

I said I wasn't staying there
and I-I left.

Yeah, that's the thing is
to look back on who you were

and what you've come through
and all of that is what

-allowed this to be sitting
in this chair right now.
-Yeah!

And then you learn to appreciate
all the things that you did

-have to go through.
-Yeah.

'Cause it's a part of it.
You might not have gotten to

where you are, you know.
And I'm sure I've got many

more mountains to climb,

that will come my way,
and I'm sure I'll have

another little, like, you know,
like swerve, you know,

swerve out of the way
for something

and stuff like that, but...

I feel like I'll get better
at it every time

-something comes up.
-Every time.

You can dance if you want.

Here we go!

Oh, thank you. Well done.
Look at that,

standing up. Thank you.

That's my only fast one,
you see.

So I know the urge--
it really kicks in when...

when a fast song comes on
with me.

You better dance while you can.

So how do
you start dating again?

I mean, you can't go on
a dating app. Do you, like...

-No.
-...take advice from friends
or somebody says,

"Oh, I know somebody"?

Like, how did you meet
Rich Paul?

I met him at a birthday party.
We were on the dance floor.

And I met him and then a
couple of-- couple years later,

we went out for dinner, which
he says was a business meeting.

I'm like,
a business meeting about what?

We wouldn't be having a meeting
about business.

And then it was just
the first time

we'd hung out only on our own,

and not with other friends
and stuff like that.

So that was a very natural way.

I think that's how people
would normally meet each other

-is, like, in real life.
-Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. What was it about him
that drew you to him?

I mean, we all know
he's the super agent.

-And he's...
-Yeah, he's just hilarious.

-He's also hilarious?
-Oh, he's so funny.

-Okay.
-No, he's hilarious.

-Yeah, and very smart.
-Okay.

You know, he's very, very smart.

It's quite... quite incredible
watching him do what he does.

And just the easiness of it.
It's just, it's...

-been very smooth.
-He's making it easy on you.

He's making it easy on me.
I'm blushing.

He's right up there.

Okay, so this relationship
with super agent Rich Paul...

I can't say his name without
saying "super agent" Rich Paul.

This relationship is the
first time you've actually...

Loved myself
and been open to loving

and being loved
by someone else. Yeah.

So Rich is getting
a different Adele

than everybody else has gotten.

Y-Yeah, but I mean,
by arriving and turning up.

-Yeah.
-You know, maybe I'm
getting a different version

of him and who knows?
It's just, it's just timing.

-Mm-hmm.
-It's just timing,
but it'll be interesting to see

what my reaction is like
in general to anything that

hurts me now that I feel
so secure in myself.

-Yeah.
-And I'm talking outside
of romance as well.

Like, I'm just talking about
any scenario.

-Yeah.
-It'll be interesting to see

how close I let it come to me.

So...

Do you think you'll be able to
write from a happy space?

Well, I hope so.

-I hope so, you know.
-Mm-hmm.

But the music will change?

Like...

Like, "Love Is," like, you know,
the last song on the album?

-"Love is a Game."
-Yeah, it's about love.

Here's some of the lyrics.

"Love is a game
for fools to play

"and I ain't fooling.
What a cruel thing

to self-inflict that pain."

And I wanted to know,
are you, Adele,

getting better at this game
of love?

Yeah, I think so because
I don't, I don't, um,

I don't treat it
like a game anymore.

You know, that thing of like,
you're gonna hurt me

so I'm gonna hurt you first.
I certainly,

I'm not like that anymore.

You know, one of the things
I think is so valuable

in knowing how to move forward
in your life

is having clarity on what
it is you really want.

Mm-hmm.

-And when you...
-And what you like.

Yes, and what you like,
but mostly

knowing in the spirit and soul
of yourself

what is it you really want

because that's how
you start to--

-drawing that to yourself.
-Yeah.

And do you know what that is,
ultimately?

What do you really want?

-Peace of mind.
-Just peace of mind?

-Just peace of mind.
-Okay.

Um, and stability, but I can--

I don't have to expect someone
else to give me stability.

I can also be stable for myself.

Be a solid house that doesn't
blow over in a storm.

Mm-hmm. Well, the best thing you
said here in this interview,

as far as I'm concerned, is that

now you're in a relationship
where, for the first time,

-your love for yourself
comes first.
-Yeah.

And all great things come
after that. I know that.

A quote I heard as well
while on my journey was:

"If you're not feeling
everything,

you're missing everything."

That sort of gave me permission.

Mm-hmm.

To really do that
during the process.

-Yeah. Yeah.
-You know? And not be upset.

This has been great. Thanks
for coming to the rose garden.

I can't believe we just
had a chat.

-It's wild.
-We had a little chat.

Thanks for letting me come
to the concert.

Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited.

-It's gonna be so great.
-I hope you like it. Yeah.

And I wish you all the things
your heart desires.

-Oh, thanks. You, too.
-That's my prayer for you.

-Thank you.
-All the things
your heart desires.

And still good music
from a happy space.

- Yeah, for sure.
- Okay?

-Thank you very much.
-Well done.

All right. So the biggest
lesson I learned

in sorting this out is that
you can't control

bloody anything,
so just go with it.

Just sit with it. Have a laugh
and enjoy all of it.

Thank you for coming tonight.

Give it up for my band.
Give it up

for the beautiful orchestra.

Give it up for yourselves.
All the crew.

Here's to real music.
Here's to live music.

Here's to real artistry as well,
all right.

Thank you for coming. Thank you
for sticking with me.

Especially everyone
that knows me

because I bet it was hard
to hang on sometimes.

Thank you.