All language subtitles for An.Astrological.Guide.For.Broken.Hearts.S01E01.ITALIAN.WEBRip.x264-ION10

A NETFLIX SERIES

[upbeat music]

[woman] There are days
when you feel it in your bones.

You know that nothing
is gonna go your way.

[alarm beeping]

Those are the days
that should start as late as possible.

[sighs]

[phone buzzing]

♪ We stand in long lines
Waitin' for a ticket ♪

♪ To see paradise
For just one minute ♪

♪ I thought I saw you walk away ♪

♪ I thought I knew you well ♪

♪ Stay on your good side
Say what you wanna hear ♪

♪ Bend over backwards
And shut up until I disappear ♪

♪ You'd never change for anyone ♪

♪ God, I'm so envious ♪

♪ And I give my love
But it's not enough ♪

♪ Now this feels like a waste of time ♪

♪ Then you fall from a height
Oh, we both could die ♪

♪ Oh, what did you have in mind? ♪

♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, oh… ♪

[sighs]

♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, oh ♪

♪ Now I'm holdin' a flatline
To make you feel alive… ♪

[woman] Oh, fuck.

[man] Do you like it?

[light chuckle] It's, uh, beautiful.

We're having a baby.

[man laughs]

I know, I know. It wasn't really planned.

It's pretty big news.

It's so weird, huh?

I'm gonna be a dad.

So then…

the ring.

Do you like it?

Mm-hmm.

-Thanks.
-[indistinct dialogue]

[man] Here I am.

-[woman 2] Hey!
-[laughter]

[indistinct dialogue]

[man] Sweetheart, we spent
a beautiful six months together.

-Cristina…
-[Cristina gasps]

…will you marry me?

[people cheering and whooping]

[Cristina] Yes, yes!

-[cork pops]
-[woman] Whoo!

[cheerful electronic music]

ARIES

Paola?

Do you even listen to me when I'm talking?

-I said he's going to have a baby!
-[softly] Where are you, Alice?

[Alice] When he was with me,
he wasn't ready.

Just five years, four months, twelve days,
and he wasn't ready!

[Paola] You have to stay calm.

And then some pretty young thing
shows up and poof!

Now he's ready!

I know how this must hurt, but…

You should've seen his face
when he told me, Paola.

[man mumbles in]

His eyes sparkled.

Honey, you're torturing yourself.
What's the point?

Why did he have to go
and get another girl pregnant?

Why does he even have to marry her?

And me?

Are you super drunk?

[Alice] Why are you whispering, Paola?

I can't hear a word you're saying.

You gotta shout, like in the old days.

Shout with me, Paola.

Fuck Carlo and Cristina!

Hey! Why the hell are you yelling?

-[Alice] Oh God.
-[Paola] Alice?

Oh, sorry.

-[man grunts]
-[Paola] Everything okay?

[baby crying]

There, there. I'll go. I'll go.

Sandro just woke up.
I'll call you tomorrow.

-[Alice] Here you go.
-[man] Something fell.

[Paola] But you get in a taxi
and go home. Got that?

[Alice] Here.

-[Paola] Alice?
-Good night!

[Paola] You got that?

[man on TV] We need to be realistic.

[woman on TV]
I would never want to hurt you,

but I am so tired.
I keep disappointing you.

[Alice blows nose]

-[man] Your memory won't come back.
-[woman crying] I'm so, so sorry!

-[man] The truth is I'm still a stranger.
-[woman] Gosh, no! It doesn't matter.

-[phone chimes]
-Disasters and weddings, sooner or later,

become funny stories.

CRISTINA
75 LIKES

[woman] Franco…

[man] How can you look
at the girl you love

and convince yourself it's time to leave?

[Alice] Why are we raised
on romantic comedies

if those stories
never happen in real life?

In those films, two people
like me and Carlo, for instance,

who've been together for a long time,

who may have had their ups and downs…

They still, in the end,
always get a happy ending.

CONGRATULATIONS, I'M PISSED
IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!

In the movies,

the heroine never ends up celebrating
some other girl's happy ending.

CONGRATULATIONS, I'M PISSED
SENT

[thunder rumbles]

[woman on radio] Now back to the studio
for the morning news at 8:30 a.m.

IMPORTANT MEETING!!! 9.30 AM

Oh God, no!

[thunder rumbles]

["Come Alive" by Ruckus Roboticus plays]

[Alice] Wait!

Shit! Ugh…

Hey!

No! No, wait! Wait!

Stop, stop! Stop.

To the Dock Studios.

Thanks.

[tires screech]

♪ That's my reward for working hard ♪

♪ I get dollas and credit cards
When I'm on the mic ♪

Thanks.

-Alice! [chuckles]
-[Alice] Oh!

-[Cristina] You disappeared last night.
-Yeah. I'm sorry.

-Something came up.
-You missed the best part.

-It's beautiful!
-[both chuckle]

However, I messaged you about it.

Of course.

Yeah, I saw. Thanks.

[chuckles]

So happy for you both!

Excuse me, though.

It's very late and I better get going.

-We got that meeting.
-Alice?

Yes?

You have something on your skirt.

[Alice] Oh, shit. The newspaper.

Okay, okay. [chuckles]

[tense music]

-[man] Good morning.
-Good morning.

DRESSING ROOMS
STUDIO B

Are you new?

It's been a while
since I was new, frankly. [chuckles]

Have a nice day.

[knocks on door]

[man] They're both cute.

But if you're gonna be on camera,
I would switch the jacket.

Nope, nope. Not going on camera.

[man] Ah.

Since you seem to be choosing a skirt
from the dressing room,

I presumed it was work related.

Yes, because I've worked here a long time.

Unlike you.

You'll excuse me, sir.

I have a lot to do.

-[man 2] Alice?
-[knocks on door]

Jesus Christ.
We're about to start the meeting in ten.

Calm down, I'm here.

Go down to the cafe
and get us decent coffee and pastries.

Only the good stuff.

-And napkins too.
-All finished.

And did you get a chance
to check on the room?

-You know how Bodrato is about that.
-I'll do it now.

Act fast.

[fast-paced music]

-Hey.
-[Alice] Oh, shit.

Hey.

You wandered off last night.

You do realize that you missed

the most important night
of my life, right?

Um… So sorry. There was an emergency.
Forgive me.

-An emergency?
-Yeah.

My mom, yeah.

She wasn't feeling well,
and I had to split. I'm sorry.

Oh God. I'm sorry. Will she be alright?

-Should I call her?
-No. She's better now. Thanks.

-Are you sure?
-Yes.

-She'd appreciate it.
-Sure. But she's better. Thanks.

[woman] Morning.

Morning, Loredana.

-[Loredana] Hi.
-[Alice] Hello.

[man] Good morning.

Don't mind me.

Please, carry on.

Hello, my love. [laughs]

[Cristina] Morning. Thanks, sweetheart.

-Good morning, guys!
-Good morning.

-Hi, good morning.
-Good morning.

-Good morning.
-[man] Please.

Here we are, folks. So…

You all know that I have always considered

Dora TV as some sort of family.

And family should share with each other.

The bad news and the good news.

Today we have both.

The good news
is that our family is growing,

as my marvelous assistant, Cristina,

will soon give birth to a little Carlo.

-[Carlo] Thanks.
-[man 3] I told you I had good news!

-[man 1] Congratulations.
-[Alice] If that was the good news…

-[Loredana] That's wonderful!
-[Cristina] That's right.

-[Carlo] Thank you.
-[man 3] Let's keep it down.

[clears throat]

The bad news is that Channel 8 will not

renew our contract for Wake Up, Torino,

unfortunately for us.

-[Carlo] Are you serious?
-Oh, no.

And once we're all done shooting
this last season,

we close.

No!

[man 3] However,

there is some very good news.

I have managed to secure us a slot
for a new kind of program.

What program, though?

I don't know because you will find us one.

But we won't be alone.

Everyone meet out talented
new creative director,

Davide Sardi.

-Davide, welcome.
-Good morning.

[man 3] He will be the one
evaluating your commitment,

your skills.

And it will be with his help
that I'll choose the best course of action

for the future of Dora TV.

Alright. Off to work!

[telephone ringing]

[Alice] Hired or fired?

Here you are.

The main character
of Dora TV's latest show.

Ten years of experience.

A degree in Media & Communication.

A film school graduate.

And all this for what?

[man 4] Watch out for germs.

-Sorry?
-[man 4 scoffs]

I'm just saying.

Public restrooms aren't really
the best place to be seeking comfort.

Um, well…

Compared to my last 24 hours,

germs seem
like a pretty appealing alternative.

Your day that shitty?

[Alice] Um…

Shitty isn't the half of it.

You are a Libra.

Right?

[Alice] Nailed it.

Yep, Libra it is.

How did you guess?

Intuition.

Plus, lots of studying.

[Alice] However,

I don't believe in all those things.

To me, astrology is bullshit.

Not for those who understand it.

[Alice] Well,

in that case,

they're saying this year my sign

is the luckiest in all the zodiac.

And yet,
I'm here totally heartbroken instead.

And I could be out of work too.

I'd love a convo
with the inventor of astrology.

Because, while everybody's out
living their best life, I'm here.

Hello. Tio.

Tio?

It's my stage name.
Abbreviation for Tiziano.

Among other things, I'm an actor
filming right here at the studio.

-You?
-Um…

Alice Bassi.

I'm assistant to the producer
at Dora TV, right next door.

Well, Alice Bassi…

You know, most people
won't believe in astrology but will…

[clicks tongue]
…still read their horoscope.

Like you, it seems.

Hold on.

The stars never tell you that you
shouldn't use the ladies' bathroom?

Those old distinctions, Alice? [scoffs]

It's just that the world is more fluid
like this.

And anyways,

you're in the men's restroom, silly.

[door closes]

[scoffs]

[Carlo] Hey! There you are. [chuckles]

Were you in the men's room?

Of course not! Don't be ridiculous.

Anyway…

Davide Sardi.

Who the hell is this guy?

[sighs]

Hey, listen. Uh…

What did that text mean?
The one that you sent to Cristina?

How's that, Carlo?

Well, I don't know.
She's paranoid now. Uh…

Well, don't worry.
We're gonna have brunch,

so you two can talk.

A brunch?

-Us three?
-[Tio] Alice?

Alice, excuse me.

Will you be much longer?

Sorry, it's just…

We have a brunch together
to talk about our work.

You understand.

-Mm.
-[Carlo] Yes, of course.

-Catch you later. Goodbye.
-[Carlo] Another time.

CONGRATULATIONS, I'M PISSED

I can't get anything right!

Yeah, obviously. You're a Libra.

Hold on. I told Cristina
I'm pissed about her marriage,

and you're saying the stars are to blame?

Listen. So…

All you wrote was "I'm pissed." Hm?

That could mean all kinds of stuff.

-Thanks.
-Thanks.

For example,

"Pissed that I missed the big moment."

Not to mention,

at the moment, the stars
don't have a favorable disposition

towards Libras.

Saturn's in retrograde the entire month,

the Sun just entered Aries
a couple days ago,

and all Libras are getting
into tricky situations,

tricky in the sense of both emotionally,
because of Venus,

and professionally as well.

-Meaning I'm not getting it right.
-Come on!

It's a little… Little phase, okay?

Yeah, but what you call "a phase,"

I call "the worst two years of my life."

That's because of Saturn's return.

Saturn is the planet
of absolute difficulty,

of discipline, of conflict.

But the good news is
that it's now moved onto Scorpio.

And because it a slow planet,

its orbit isn't going to be in Libra
for like…

thirty years.

Wish it had moved into Aquarius.

Was the Aquarius that guy from earlier
who was cornering you into brunch?

Yeah.

Carlo.

He's my ex.

Well…

So, Aquarius is the sign
of liberty and spontaneity.

It's a bit difficult
to get them to grow roots. Hm?

You…

would prefer a Leo. Mm?

Dominant,

but able to protect
and care for his partner.

Or maybe an adventurous Sagittarius?

-A Scorpio?
-No. Mm-mm.

Don't want a Scorpio, alright?

'Cause he has Saturn in opposition.
He can manage that alone.

We could talk about Scorpio another year,

when that hot potato gets passed
to another sign.

-Where are you going?
-It's late, I gotta go.

-Ah… Okay. You don't want that?
-Put it on my tab.

[salsa music]

Let me get this straight.

I'm telling you that I might lose my job,
that I won't be able to pay my rent,

and you tell me
I don't have my bedroom any longer?

Honey, your papa and I were not aware.

[Alice] Alright, Mom, but now you are. So?

It's too late now,
'cause we removed the furniture

and the things from your room,

and it's the ideal size
for my painting and sculpture studio.

And, at the absolute worst case,
there's the guest room.

[Alice] Unbelievable.

Hey, listen. Are you going
to come get this stuff soon?

Because papa has packed it away
for you already.

All my stuff too?

Oh, but the news with Carlo I just heard--
He's expecting a baby and getting married.

How fantastic!

How did you hear that?

[mother] He called me earlier.

I'm not sure why,
but he was worried about my health.

Anyway, he's a sweetheart.
He's always been a sweetheart.

[Alice] Sorry, Mom, you're breaking up.
I'm gonna go, okay?

-[mother] Alice?
-Bye.

At the end of days like today,

just two things can save you
from ending it all:

plenty of spritz

and Paola to drink it with.

Anywho, somewhere I read

that Scorpios in bed
are totally incredible.

Yes, but this guy Tio…

Do we really gotta talk
about a guy who calls himself Tio?

[laughs] Forget the name.

So, the thing is, he says that Carlo,

as a total Aquarius,

is tipically dispersive
in his relationships, you know?

But Cristina's having his child.
And Carlo is marrying her.

And here we are,
gossiping about astrology.

But the past is the past. It's over.

Suits me.

Then tell me, how do you plan
on dealing with this new work situation?

It could be a great opportunity.
You know that, right?

Because you've not looked
into the hangman's eager eyes yet.

No, for real, Alice.
You've been working at this job for years.

You can do it with your eyes shut

and you're worth more
than what Enrico is giving you.

Nevertheless, everything I know
I owe to Enrico.

Sure, fine.
All I'm saying is, you're a grown girl.

It's time to ditch the nest and fly.

And also this thing with Carlo…

-I said that's enough about that.
-[Paola] Alice.

You've used this excuse of a friendship
for two years.

To avoid turning the page.

Well, I…

And now it's your time
to take flight, girl!

[laughs]

Time to get fabulous and fierce!

Alice, let the world know
who you really are.

["Wildcat" by Electrocute
playing over stereo]

♪ All my girls gonna sing it loud
We go na na na na na na na ♪

♪ There's no one that could stop us now
We go na na na na na na na  ♪

♪ Get a little crazy wildcat ♪

♪ Don't you know
There's nothing wrong with that? ♪

♪ All my girls gonna sing it loud
We go na na na… ♪

Hey! Hi!

-How's it going, Paola?
-Fine, and you?

Fine, fine.

Hi, I'm Luca.

Hi, Alice!

He works with me at the newspaper.
Luca is a colleague!

Yes, a colleague who is really surprised

to see miss mamma bird
finally out partying a little.

I'm glad.

I'm the one leading her astray.

You've done well. Bravo!

We shouldn't ever neglect our friends.

I did everything for my girlfriend.

[Alice] Damn it. Whatever.

And then, finally, bam!
She decided to leave me. Why?

Because she needed some space. Whatever.

-[Paola] Oh, yeah!
-Reminds me of a girl I know.

So now I'm reconnecting with some friends
I lost along the way.

Over there.

What else can I say?
It was a pleasure meeting you.

I'd like to see you again soon.

Bye.

-Bye, Paola.
-Ciao!

Oh, he is cute!

Yes, but…

Do we know his sign yet?

[Paola laughs]

["You Love It" by Electrocute
playing over radio]

[humming]

♪ This is no confessional
You need a professional ♪

♪ Better call the doctor ♪

-[whoops]
-♪ Before I go crazy ♪

♪ If you want to play some
Kick it like a bass drum ♪

♪ Call me on the phone
And baby I'll show you something ♪

[singing along] ♪ You love it, you love it
You love it, yeah ♪

♪ You love it, you love it
You love it, yeah ♪

♪ Love it, or leave it
Or love it like that ♪

♪ You love it, you love it
You love it, yeah ♪

-[tires screech]
-[Alice whoops and laughs]

♪ This is no confessional
You need a professional ♪

♪ Better call the doctor
Before I go crazy ♪

♪ If you want to play some
Kick it like a bass drum ♪

♪ Call me on the phone
And baby I'll show you something ♪

♪ You love it, you love it
You love it, yeah ♪

♪ Love it, you love it
You love it, yeah ♪

-[music stops]
-[phone chimes]

[Tio] Morning, my skeptical little Libra!
Here's your horoscope of the day.

You're energetic and gutsy,

but you'll be put to the test
by possible clashes

-with people who…
-[phone beeps]

It's dangerous
to get distracted while driving.

Um… Yes.

Good morning.

You have a really nice voice, Miss Bassi.

Perhaps it's your new career calling you.

[man 2] I hope you're joking.

What do you mean, the studio isn't ready?
Where's Alice?

-I'm here!
-Where were you?

It seems as if no one knows
that we have two episodes to shoot

and now we're running 45 minutes late!

Enrico, you never mentioned two episodes.

Of course I did!
Tomorrow, Marlin is in Rome!

Okay, give me five minutes.

[upbeat music plays]

Follow me.

Let's go.

-[Alice] Good morning!
-Good morning, love.

-Good morning, dearest.
-Morning.

-Morning!
-Hello. Morning.

-Morning.
-Well…

Everybody here's panicking.
Just letting you know.

I know, Carlo. Enrico didn't tell me
we're filming the two episodes...

-Excuse me?
-Yes?

-May I have some coffee?
-Sure. On my way.

Thanks.

Can I get some water?
There's something wrong with the machine.

Yeah, just a second. Ah, Sergio.

Let's shake some sense in this machine.

-Thanks.
-One, two, three…

[both grunt]

-[Sergio] Alice?
-Yes.

[Sergio] Come on, now.

[chuckles]

[bottle thuds]

-[man] Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.

WAKE UP, TORINO

Wake up, Torino!

Good morning, friends,
and welcome to Wake Up, Torino!

A big kiss from your Marlin.

[blows kisses]

-[Carlo] Slide to camera one.
-[operator] Mm-hmm.

Exactly.

[Marlin] I introduce you
to our first guest of today.

There he is, I can feel him moving!

It's our own Paulo!

Paulo?

That's "Paùlo"?

"Paolo."

What's this guy's name? Sorry.
Isn't it Paolo?

Paolo.

[Paolo laughs] Exactly.

This Paolo, believe it or not,

he has now become
internationally famous, or--

Am I correct? Internationally?
Would you agree?

Because he's the biggest
and most important

collector of LPs on planet Earth! [laughs]

Can you cut to Marlin's close-up one sec?

-Good. Stay on them.
-[Marlin] Remember LPs?

Those incredible circular objects

that spin around and just crackle
on top of the gramophone?

"Gramophone"? What is she saying?

-[Carlo] Well…
-Why? Oh, no!

Stop!

[buzzer rings]

Did they say "stop"?

-Because they stopped.
-[woman] Stop rolling?

Sorry, but why did you stop rolling?

And then we ask ourselves
why the network is shutting us down.

Because you're ignorant, that's why!

While we're at it,
I'll touch up your make-up.

Touch-up, yeah. No circles, okay?

A little, a little.

[man 2] I gotta go
and give her a piece of my mind.

-What?
-[Alice] Calm down.

-What's gotten into you, Enrico?
-[Enrico sighs]

Please… [sighs]

Okay. Give me one minute.
I'll sort it all out.

-[Carlo] Well done. Okay.
-Coming.

Your mike, Claretti.
You leaned in a bit too much.

Hi!

-There you are, sweetie. This is Alice.
-[Alice] My dearest Marlin.

-Hi, darling.
-This blouse is great.

-I said, "Well, blue…"
-[Alice] Nice! Listen…

Um, the line with the gramophones--

Brilliant, no?
It sprang into my mind the other day.

Then I said, "the gramophone…"

-Yes, it's a really great image.
-Yeah?

But unfortunately, LPs actually
were never for gramophones.

They weren't?

No.

-Are you certain?
-[Alice] Mm-hmm.

[Marlin] That's weird.

From the top, okay?

-Yeah, sure.
-[Alice] Let's go.

-Good.
-Remember to always start with camera two.

-I'll cut the gramophone?
-Yes, please. Are you comfortable?

Evidently. [chuckles]

Let's keep rolling!

Okay.

-You're ready, Claretti?
-Mm-hmm. [chuckles]

[alarm rings]

Wake up, Torino!

[sighs]

Not halfway done with the day yet.

Okay.

Ah. Don't worry, Carlo.
I've sorted it all out.

[gasps]

Well done.

[softly] Thank you.

[inhales, exhales]

[Tio] Morning, my skeptical little Libra!

Here's your horoscope of the day.

You're energetic and gutsy,

but you'll be put to the test
by possible clashes

with people
who have different ideas then you.

In matters of the heart:

beware.

There's the possibility
of a super tempestuous romance today.

Kisses! Tio.

[serene music]

-[Tio] Hello?
-Tio?

-[Tio] Hi.
-Hi! Where are you?

In my dressing room.

Can I speak to you a sec?

Hola, guapisima.

I am Marcus

Alvarez de la Rosa,

cousin to Fernando Prandi,

also an ex of his girlfriend,

with whom I once was in a love

explosion.

How'd you get the scar?

Oh, gee. The scar…

Olé!

Muchas gracias.

Give me five minutes.

I'll take this fluffy poodle
to the groomer's. Join you downstairs.

[laughs]

It's unbelievable, Tio.

You guessed almost every detail
of my whole day.

Like, there was…

You guessed the mood,

and the tensions at work...

and you've worked this out
from the position of the planets?

That's astrology.

[groans] Oh God.

Oh, excuse me.

[groans, exhales]

Oh God. [sighs]

[sigh of relief] Phew!

Why "almost"?

-What did I miss?
-[Alice] Well…

The super tempestuous romance, you know?

Not even a hint of this romance.

I mean… Okay, some patience.

Day's not over quite yet.

[phone chimes]

Hi, it's Luca. Paola's friend.

We met last night.

Um, I was wondering if you'd like
to grab a drink with me one evening.

Mm!

-How did you know everything?
-Mm-hmm!

Madame, at your service.

What sign is
this tempestuous little romance?

Aries.

I believe it's Aries.

Aries.

So simple, so masculine.

A man that can always admire
certain events,

like, for example,

the discovery of fire

or the invention of the wheel.

But, genetically speaking,

bad at getting
all the little nuances, like…

say, basic hygiene or gallantry.

He thumps on his chest
when someone threatens something

he believes is his territory.

Meaning, basically, Tarzan

certainly was a perfect Aries.

So, if you'd rather not date

a man who forages for berries
or swings from a three,

or you don't wanna walk him three times
a day so that he can do his business,

then it is best to move on.

In your opinion,
is a super tempestuous romance possible

between an Aries man

and a little Libra woman?

Let's talk about it, okay?

So,

first of all,

you gotta tell me if you, like...

Um, do you know
the Australopithecus vulgaris?

The first metamorphosis of human beings,
you know?

-The first stage...
-[laughs]

[Tio] That's it, because with Aries...

[continues indistinctly]

["Easy" by Lakota & Evelinn Trouble]

♪ The sadness
And the beauty of the things ♪

♪ I raise my eyes slowly ♪

♪ Give you chance to get to know me ♪

♪ I'm gonna stay here in the moment ♪

♪ Before it’s over let me know ♪