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1
00:00:01,958 --> 00:00:03,658
[Thinking] Yes,
it's come to this.
2
00:00:03,742 --> 00:00:06,442
I'm joining the masses
and starting a blog.
3
00:00:06,528 --> 00:00:09,098
The last 6 weeks
have been challenging.
4
00:00:09,183 --> 00:00:11,493
My little sister,
who's usually perfect,
5
00:00:11,576 --> 00:00:13,876
seems to be just
as lost as I am,
6
00:00:13,970 --> 00:00:16,710
which ironically brings
balance to the universe.
7
00:00:16,799 --> 00:00:19,409
And it's not like my personal
life was soaring before,
8
00:00:19,497 --> 00:00:22,807
but now it seems to be going
down like a brick parachute.
9
00:00:22,892 --> 00:00:23,892
[Laughter]
10
00:00:26,983 --> 00:00:29,423
Hey, Dee Dee. I see
you've been shopping again.
11
00:00:29,507 --> 00:00:31,247
What's in the bags today?
12
00:00:31,335 --> 00:00:34,425
Shoes, jeans, jewelry,
the usual. You?
13
00:00:34,512 --> 00:00:37,522
Candy wrappers, junk mail,
last night's dinner, the usual.
14
00:00:37,602 --> 00:00:38,602
[Laughter]
15
00:00:40,301 --> 00:00:43,091
Oh, it looks like we're
getting another new neighbor.
16
00:00:43,173 --> 00:00:45,613
Dad didn't mention it. But
why should we be surprised?
17
00:00:45,697 --> 00:00:46,867
First it was my mom,
18
00:00:46,959 --> 00:00:48,829
now it's probably
just another kook.
19
00:00:48,918 --> 00:00:51,488
Well, this kook just spent
30 minutes folding the stuff
20
00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:53,183
left in the dryer
by kook junior.
21
00:00:53,270 --> 00:00:54,400
[Laughter]
22
00:00:54,489 --> 00:00:55,659
Thanks, ma.
23
00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:57,321
And buy some new socks.
24
00:00:57,405 --> 00:00:59,405
Looks like you've been
sliding on sidewalks in 'em.
25
00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:00,580
[Laughter]
26
00:01:02,584 --> 00:01:03,934
- Hi, ladies.
- Hi.
27
00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:06,240
I'm Lorenzo. I'm just
moving in upstairs.
28
00:01:06,327 --> 00:01:08,157
We're Mona and Dee Dee.
29
00:01:08,242 --> 00:01:09,852
She's Mona. I'm Dee Dee.
30
00:01:09,939 --> 00:01:10,939
[Laughter]
31
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:14,422
We live up there and down here.
32
00:01:14,509 --> 00:01:16,599
I live up there. She
lives down here.
33
00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:18,685
[Laughter]
34
00:01:18,774 --> 00:01:21,084
Mona, Dee Dee, up
there, down here. I got it.
35
00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:22,998
[Laughter]
36
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,823
You know, it's a
relief to meet you two.
37
00:01:24,910 --> 00:01:27,220
I was worried I'd end up
next door to some nosy woman
38
00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:28,764
who likes to troll
the halls in her robe.
39
00:01:28,784 --> 00:01:31,134
[Laughter]
40
00:01:31,221 --> 00:01:33,661
- Yay for us!
- Mona: Yay for you.
41
00:01:33,745 --> 00:01:35,655
Won't be long before
he's knocking on your door.
42
00:01:35,747 --> 00:01:36,917
You get to come home
43
00:01:37,009 --> 00:01:38,489
to the smell of a man's Cologne,
44
00:01:38,576 --> 00:01:40,616
and I get to inhale
Jean Nate and kitty litter.
45
00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:41,929
[Laughter]
46
00:01:42,014 --> 00:01:43,234
Phyllis: I heard that!
47
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:44,320
[Laughter]
48
00:01:46,454 --> 00:01:48,204
[Introductory theme song]
49
00:01:48,282 --> 00:01:53,422
♪ through this
journey of discovery ♪
50
00:01:53,504 --> 00:01:57,814
♪ you're finding
you I'm finding me ♪
51
00:01:57,900 --> 00:02:00,950
♪ now that I have
someone special ♪
52
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:03,173
♪ who brings out the joy ♪
53
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:04,913
♪ brings out the
joy inside of me ♪
54
00:02:04,994 --> 00:02:07,614
♪ inside of me ♪
55
00:02:07,692 --> 00:02:09,612
♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪
56
00:02:09,694 --> 00:02:12,264
♪ all we need is lovin', yeah ♪
57
00:02:12,349 --> 00:02:15,349
♪ that's the way I
feel it should be ♪
58
00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:17,219
♪ you and me ♪
59
00:02:17,311 --> 00:02:20,311
[Off-key] ♪ me ♪
60
00:02:20,401 --> 00:02:22,011
Ooh. [Ironic laughter]
61
00:02:23,578 --> 00:02:25,058
[Introductory musical note]
62
00:02:26,711 --> 00:02:30,631
Greetings and salutations,
well-compensated v.P. Of a&r.
63
00:02:30,715 --> 00:02:31,975
[Laughter]
64
00:02:33,805 --> 00:02:36,585
I'm overseeing the
official interoffice collection
65
00:02:36,678 --> 00:02:39,378
for receptionist
appreciation day.
66
00:02:39,463 --> 00:02:41,293
[Laughter]
67
00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:42,378
Big bills are welcomed.
68
00:02:44,207 --> 00:02:45,687
I'm not giving you money, Adam.
69
00:02:45,774 --> 00:02:47,384
Then how do you
plan to appreciate me?
70
00:02:47,471 --> 00:02:49,231
By not telling everyone
there's no such thing
71
00:02:49,299 --> 00:02:50,649
as receptionist
appreciation day.
72
00:02:50,735 --> 00:02:52,385
[Laughter]
73
00:02:52,476 --> 00:02:54,696
Hey, Mona. What do you
think this outfit says about me?
74
00:02:54,783 --> 00:02:56,833
That you're conservative
and intellectual
75
00:02:56,915 --> 00:02:58,735
and pretty much
everything you're not.
76
00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:00,350
Then I'm off to a good start.
77
00:03:00,441 --> 00:03:02,701
I just read this really
inspirational book.
78
00:03:02,791 --> 00:03:04,841
Gumbo for the
African American soul.
79
00:03:04,923 --> 00:03:05,923
[Laughter]
80
00:03:07,578 --> 00:03:09,058
It made me realize
81
00:03:09,145 --> 00:03:11,095
I need to start taking
my life more seriously.
82
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:14,321
So, I'm working on a wardrobe
that reflects my new image.
83
00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:17,461
- [Both] You read a book?
- [Laughter]
84
00:03:17,545 --> 00:03:20,325
See? It's that image
I'm trying to change.
85
00:03:20,417 --> 00:03:23,197
This is the new Spencer.
The Spencer who reads.
86
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:24,730
[Mona laughs]
87
00:03:24,813 --> 00:03:26,683
And who'll be showing
his appreciation in cash?
88
00:03:26,771 --> 00:03:28,601
Adam, there's no such holiday.
89
00:03:28,686 --> 00:03:31,776
All right, you got me.
But it is my birthday.
90
00:03:31,863 --> 00:03:33,003
I'll go get my wallet.
91
00:03:33,082 --> 00:03:34,872
[Laughter]
92
00:03:34,953 --> 00:03:36,933
Lucky for me, there's a
little of the old Spencer left.
93
00:03:36,955 --> 00:03:38,085
[Laughter]
94
00:03:39,654 --> 00:03:41,004
Hi, sis, you busy?
95
00:03:41,090 --> 00:03:43,610
I need a second
opinion on this fabric.
96
00:03:43,701 --> 00:03:45,751
I'm doing some redecorating.
97
00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:47,364
I like that one.
98
00:03:47,444 --> 00:03:49,194
Dee Dee: Really?
99
00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:51,802
Because I was leaning toward
the pastel. It says freshness.
100
00:03:51,883 --> 00:03:53,543
Ok, then go with that one.
101
00:03:53,624 --> 00:03:57,284
Really? Because the earth
tones evoke a warmer feeling
102
00:03:57,367 --> 00:03:58,757
that says, "welcome."
103
00:03:58,847 --> 00:04:00,107
Ok, then go with both.
104
00:04:00,196 --> 00:04:01,846
It'll say, "welcome
to my freshness."
105
00:04:01,937 --> 00:04:02,937
[Laughter]
106
00:04:04,331 --> 00:04:07,031
You really aren't
good at this, are you?
107
00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:09,246
Hey, you know, I could
redecorate your office.
108
00:04:09,336 --> 00:04:11,336
Which, by the way, is
neither welcome or fresh.
109
00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:14,690
You know, Dee Dee,
ever since you graduated
110
00:04:14,776 --> 00:04:16,556
and took the bar,
111
00:04:16,647 --> 00:04:18,147
you've been filling your days
with a lot of frivolous stuff.
112
00:04:18,170 --> 00:04:20,480
I mean, shopping and decorating.
113
00:04:20,564 --> 00:04:22,174
What happened to your drive?
114
00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:25,482
Look, every law firm in town
has a copy of my résumé.
115
00:04:25,569 --> 00:04:26,959
They know where to find me.
116
00:04:27,049 --> 00:04:28,789
Plus, I'm tired of
all the rejection.
117
00:04:28,877 --> 00:04:31,097
Rejection is a part of life.
118
00:04:31,183 --> 00:04:32,663
Actually, according
to my mother,
119
00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:33,750
it's the cornerstone.
120
00:04:33,838 --> 00:04:35,488
[Laughter]
121
00:04:35,579 --> 00:04:37,889
Opportunities are not
gonna magically just appear
122
00:04:37,973 --> 00:04:39,323
because you're Dee Dee.
123
00:04:39,409 --> 00:04:41,019
You need to get off your butt
124
00:04:41,106 --> 00:04:43,456
and actually do something
productive with your life.
125
00:04:44,588 --> 00:04:46,068
Thank you, Mona.
126
00:04:46,155 --> 00:04:48,325
I really needed to hear that.
127
00:04:48,418 --> 00:04:50,638
Maybe not in such a
harsh and judgmental way,
128
00:04:50,725 --> 00:04:52,635
but you do have to
work in this drab office,
129
00:04:52,727 --> 00:04:54,137
and I can see how that
would make you hostile.
130
00:04:54,163 --> 00:04:55,163
[Laughter]
131
00:04:55,251 --> 00:04:56,471
[Introductory musical note]
132
00:04:57,949 --> 00:05:00,079
How does a grown
man get this far in life
133
00:05:00,169 --> 00:05:01,819
not knowing how to tie a tie?
134
00:05:01,910 --> 00:05:03,910
The same way a grown
woman gets this far
135
00:05:03,999 --> 00:05:05,479
not knowing how to
cook a decent meal.
136
00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:07,216
[Laughter]
137
00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:08,477
- [Chokes]
- Oh, I'm sorry.
138
00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:10,139
Was that too tight?
139
00:05:10,222 --> 00:05:11,702
Hey, I brought some dinner.
140
00:05:11,789 --> 00:05:13,489
Nice suit, Spence.
141
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:15,274
You going to court
or did somebody die?
142
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:17,268
[Laughter]
143
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:19,100
I'm trying out a more
professional look.
144
00:05:19,188 --> 00:05:20,538
And my mom's trying out
145
00:05:20,624 --> 00:05:22,344
the crazy relative
locked in the attic look.
146
00:05:22,365 --> 00:05:23,795
[Laughter]
147
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:26,148
Do you even wear
clothes anymore?
148
00:05:26,238 --> 00:05:28,278
I don't need to get dressed
to walk across the hall.
149
00:05:28,371 --> 00:05:30,241
- Yes, you do.
- [Knock on the door]
150
00:05:31,722 --> 00:05:32,942
[Mona scoffs]
151
00:05:34,203 --> 00:05:36,643
Hey, Lorenzo. You all moved in?
152
00:05:36,727 --> 00:05:38,287
Yeah, yeah. I'm pretty tired.
153
00:05:38,381 --> 00:05:39,711
But I can't lay
down till I figure out
154
00:05:39,730 --> 00:05:41,120
which box has my sheets in.
155
00:05:41,210 --> 00:05:43,170
[Both chuckle]
156
00:05:43,255 --> 00:05:44,255
[Laughter]
157
00:05:45,562 --> 00:05:47,172
Do you happen to
have any baking soda?
158
00:05:47,259 --> 00:05:49,129
Top cabinet, second
shelf, right corner.
159
00:05:49,218 --> 00:05:50,788
I guess that's yes. Come on in.
160
00:05:50,872 --> 00:05:52,832
This is my mom Phyllis.
And that's Spencer.
161
00:05:52,917 --> 00:05:54,287
- He's not her boyfriend.
- I'm not her boyfriend.
162
00:05:54,310 --> 00:05:55,880
[Laughter]
163
00:05:55,964 --> 00:05:58,754
- Thanks for clearing that up.
- Mona loves baking soda.
164
00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:01,666
She uses it for toothpaste,
deodorant, upset stomach, gas...
165
00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:04,022
It does everything but
keep my mom quiet.
166
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:06,712
- [Lorenzo laughs]
- So, Lorenzo, is it?
167
00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:08,411
What brings you to the building?
168
00:06:08,498 --> 00:06:10,148
Well, I wanted to
be closer to work.
169
00:06:10,239 --> 00:06:11,589
I'm a pastry chef at citrine.
170
00:06:11,675 --> 00:06:12,715
[Both] Ooh.
171
00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:14,157
[Laughter]
172
00:06:14,243 --> 00:06:16,253
Nobody loves
pastry like my Mona.
173
00:06:16,332 --> 00:06:18,902
Girl's a pastry-eating
fool. [Laughs]
174
00:06:18,987 --> 00:06:20,417
Are you married?
175
00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:22,900
[Fake laugh] If you need
anything else, stop by.
176
00:06:22,991 --> 00:06:24,251
Just not when she's here.
177
00:06:24,340 --> 00:06:25,910
Which is pretty
much all the time,
178
00:06:25,994 --> 00:06:27,214
so I guess this is goodbye.
179
00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:28,649
[Laughter]
180
00:06:28,736 --> 00:06:30,346
Mona, didn't you
see that brother
181
00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:32,173
was sending you
signals? [Scoffs]
182
00:06:32,261 --> 00:06:34,921
I bet he's still in the hallway
figuring out his next move.
183
00:06:35,003 --> 00:06:38,013
Oh, puh-lease. He is
not still in the hallway.
184
00:06:38,093 --> 00:06:39,183
Hey!
185
00:06:39,268 --> 00:06:40,398
[Laughter]
186
00:06:40,487 --> 00:06:42,047
What are you doing?
187
00:06:42,140 --> 00:06:43,360
Figuring out my next move.
188
00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:45,226
[Laughter]
189
00:06:45,317 --> 00:06:46,747
I really wanted to ask you out.
190
00:06:46,841 --> 00:06:48,541
She'll be there.
191
00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:49,835
[Introductory musical note]
192
00:06:51,498 --> 00:06:52,628
Hello, Phyllis.
193
00:06:52,716 --> 00:06:54,756
Charles, big Dee Dee.
194
00:06:56,024 --> 00:06:58,774
Phyllis: When did the
dog join the circus?
195
00:06:58,853 --> 00:07:00,903
I see she's surrounded
by a giraffe and a midget.
196
00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:02,195
[Laughter]
197
00:07:02,291 --> 00:07:03,951
And the bearded lady makes four.
198
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,905
Coco happens to be wearing
the latest in canine couture.
199
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:09,862
Some of us provide
more for our pets
200
00:07:09,951 --> 00:07:12,431
than scraps of tuna and
toys made from old pantyhose.
201
00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:14,259
[Laughter]
202
00:07:14,346 --> 00:07:16,606
Charles, here's a list of
the upgrades I'll be needing
203
00:07:16,697 --> 00:07:18,087
for my apartment.
204
00:07:18,176 --> 00:07:19,676
What does she want,
a larger shower door?
205
00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:20,960
Just soap down the sides
206
00:07:21,049 --> 00:07:22,439
and you'll slip
right on through.
207
00:07:23,486 --> 00:07:25,356
I'll replace the
ceiling fan. That's it.
208
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:28,575
Fine. Why waste money
raising your property value
209
00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:31,485
when you can spend it
on bling for your beast?
210
00:07:31,581 --> 00:07:32,761
And your dog.
211
00:07:32,843 --> 00:07:33,843
[Laughter]
212
00:07:36,281 --> 00:07:38,551
I don't know why you
rented to that woman.
213
00:07:38,632 --> 00:07:40,552
Well, she's the mother
of my oldest child...
214
00:07:40,634 --> 00:07:42,814
- That's wearing thin, Charles.
- [Laughter]
215
00:07:42,897 --> 00:07:44,377
Phyllis is one of
the few tenants
216
00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:45,684
that actually pays rent.
217
00:07:45,769 --> 00:07:47,159
Let's not forget Lorenzo.
218
00:07:47,249 --> 00:07:48,639
When my colorist told me
219
00:07:48,729 --> 00:07:50,769
that her handsome
godson was looking to move,
220
00:07:50,861 --> 00:07:52,471
I just knew he would be perfect
221
00:07:52,559 --> 00:07:54,209
for the apartment
across from Dee Dee.
222
00:07:54,299 --> 00:07:56,299
When they see each
other, sparks are gonna fly.
223
00:07:58,303 --> 00:07:59,703
Thank you for dinner.
224
00:07:59,783 --> 00:08:00,783
[Mona chuckles]
225
00:08:02,351 --> 00:08:05,091
As usual, your manipulation
is working magnificently.
226
00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:07,050
[Laughter]
227
00:08:07,138 --> 00:08:08,878
[Mona laughs]
228
00:08:08,966 --> 00:08:10,486
Mona, you have the best laugh.
229
00:08:10,577 --> 00:08:12,927
Except when I snort.
Which I do, a lot.
230
00:08:13,014 --> 00:08:14,544
I'm sure I'd like that, too.
231
00:08:14,624 --> 00:08:16,384
Oh, no, it really bothers
people. You'll see.
232
00:08:16,452 --> 00:08:17,762
[Laugther]
233
00:08:17,845 --> 00:08:19,365
I really had a
good time tonight.
234
00:08:19,455 --> 00:08:20,455
Me, too.
235
00:08:23,764 --> 00:08:25,684
[Laughs and snorts] Oh!
236
00:08:25,766 --> 00:08:27,506
[Laughter]
237
00:08:27,594 --> 00:08:28,594
Good night.
238
00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:33,341
Not so fast, pastry man!
239
00:08:33,425 --> 00:08:34,855
[Laughter]
240
00:08:34,949 --> 00:08:36,819
Now, didn't I tell you
not to talk to the women
241
00:08:36,907 --> 00:08:38,187
at the bottom of
the steps, didn't I?
242
00:08:38,213 --> 00:08:39,823
[Laugther]
243
00:08:39,910 --> 00:08:41,300
Pardon me?
244
00:08:41,390 --> 00:08:43,700
Just walk away, young
man. Just walk away.
245
00:08:43,784 --> 00:08:45,744
[Laughter]
246
00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:47,439
Thank you all for
coming over to see
247
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,217
my newly decorated apartment,
248
00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:51,051
and to hear my big announcement.
249
00:08:51,139 --> 00:08:53,009
We're all very excited.
250
00:08:53,097 --> 00:08:55,007
Coco even wore big
announcement booties.
251
00:08:55,099 --> 00:08:56,839
[Laughter]
252
00:08:56,927 --> 00:08:58,357
$86 a paw.
253
00:08:58,450 --> 00:09:00,410
[Laughter]
254
00:09:00,496 --> 00:09:03,056
So, the other day I went to
Mona for decorating advice.
255
00:09:03,151 --> 00:09:04,411
[Big Dee Dee laughs]
256
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:05,500
[Laughter]
257
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,896
I know, but she did point out
258
00:09:08,983 --> 00:09:10,993
that I needed to
get my life on track.
259
00:09:11,072 --> 00:09:12,992
Yep. That's what I told her.
260
00:09:13,074 --> 00:09:15,954
That's why I've decided
to go back to school.
261
00:09:16,033 --> 00:09:17,863
For a doctorate in philosophy.
262
00:09:19,689 --> 00:09:21,289
I didn't say nothing
about no philosophy.
263
00:09:21,343 --> 00:09:22,613
[Laugther]
264
00:09:22,692 --> 00:09:25,042
And it's only a
two-year program.
265
00:09:25,129 --> 00:09:27,609
Unless I do an emphasis
in early German skeptics,
266
00:09:27,697 --> 00:09:28,867
then it's three.
267
00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:30,829
If I do a year of
research abroad
268
00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,918
and take two to
complete my dissertation,
269
00:09:33,007 --> 00:09:35,047
I'll be finished in
six years, eight Max.
270
00:09:35,139 --> 00:09:36,939
And why are you looking
at me like that, daddy?
271
00:09:36,967 --> 00:09:37,967
[Laughter]
272
00:09:39,274 --> 00:09:40,454
Take a blink, dear.
273
00:09:40,536 --> 00:09:41,536
[Laughter]
274
00:09:42,799 --> 00:09:45,019
How do you intend to
pay for all this education?
275
00:09:45,106 --> 00:09:46,536
And try coming up with an answer
276
00:09:46,629 --> 00:09:48,069
that doesn't include my name.
277
00:09:48,152 --> 00:09:49,552
- But, daddy...
- Heard my name.
278
00:09:49,632 --> 00:09:51,902
[Laughter]
279
00:09:51,982 --> 00:09:54,162
Well, it's not like we
don't have the money.
280
00:09:54,245 --> 00:09:55,955
Correction. Your mother
and I have the money.
281
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:57,766
And I think by
giving you everything,
282
00:09:57,858 --> 00:10:00,298
we've made your
life a little too easy.
283
00:10:00,382 --> 00:10:03,302
Some call it
easy. I call it love.
284
00:10:03,385 --> 00:10:04,385
I love you, daddy.
285
00:10:04,473 --> 00:10:05,613
[Laughter]
286
00:10:06,954 --> 00:10:09,304
Sweetheart, you
have a law degree.
287
00:10:09,391 --> 00:10:11,131
Going back to school
is just another way
288
00:10:11,219 --> 00:10:12,589
for you to hide
from the real world.
289
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:13,872
- It's got to end.
- It will.
290
00:10:13,961 --> 00:10:15,791
In six years, eight Max.
291
00:10:15,876 --> 00:10:16,876
[Laughter]
292
00:10:17,965 --> 00:10:19,655
I think that idea's dead, sis.
293
00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:21,619
[Laughter]
294
00:10:21,708 --> 00:10:23,878
Dee Dee, I'm doing this
because you need to become
295
00:10:23,971 --> 00:10:25,451
a responsible,
independent adult.
296
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:26,887
And it's gotta start now.
297
00:10:26,974 --> 00:10:29,324
Congratulations.
You're on your own.
298
00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:30,981
I'm sorry. I don't understand.
299
00:10:31,065 --> 00:10:32,885
[Laughter]
300
00:10:32,980 --> 00:10:35,720
Charles, you can't be serious.
Even coco has an allowance.
301
00:10:37,288 --> 00:10:39,458
I'll show you how serious
I am. I have kept a tally
302
00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:41,421
of your expenses
since you turned 21.
303
00:10:41,510 --> 00:10:43,790
I thought you were just keeping
track of your gas mileage.
304
00:10:43,817 --> 00:10:45,647
I'm clocking all expenses, Dee.
305
00:10:45,732 --> 00:10:47,652
- I'll be quiet now.
- [Laughter]
306
00:10:49,126 --> 00:10:51,386
Baby girl, the Thorne line
of credit extended to you
307
00:10:51,476 --> 00:10:53,736
is now due and payable.
308
00:10:53,827 --> 00:10:55,257
One day, you'll
thank me for this.
309
00:10:56,830 --> 00:10:58,440
I'm sorry. I don't understand.
310
00:10:58,527 --> 00:11:00,047
[Laughter]
311
00:11:00,137 --> 00:11:01,617
For god's sake, Charles.
312
00:11:01,704 --> 00:11:03,494
She's sorry and she
doesn't understand!
313
00:11:03,575 --> 00:11:04,745
[Introductory musical note]
314
00:11:06,970 --> 00:11:08,060
[Knock on door]
315
00:11:10,147 --> 00:11:12,717
Look at you, up and about.
316
00:11:12,802 --> 00:11:15,112
I'm so glad you're
not still in your closet
317
00:11:15,196 --> 00:11:17,326
clutching your shoes
for the third day straight.
318
00:11:17,415 --> 00:11:19,325
[Laughter]
319
00:11:19,417 --> 00:11:22,197
I was just saying
goodbye to my men.
320
00:11:22,290 --> 00:11:24,640
Charles David, Marc
Jacobs, Jimmy choo.
321
00:11:24,727 --> 00:11:25,727
[Laughter]
322
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:29,694
All going back
to the store today.
323
00:11:29,776 --> 00:11:32,466
This whole being on your
own concept isn't easy.
324
00:11:32,561 --> 00:11:33,871
I'm not like you,
325
00:11:33,954 --> 00:11:35,524
all flea-market-ish
and swap-meety.
326
00:11:35,607 --> 00:11:36,827
[Laughter]
327
00:11:36,913 --> 00:11:38,523
But I'm determined to do it.
328
00:11:38,610 --> 00:11:40,960
I even picked up
this great book.
329
00:11:42,571 --> 00:11:44,791
Oh, the modern
girl's guide to life.
330
00:11:44,878 --> 00:11:47,528
First Spencer, now you.
I gotta get me a book.
331
00:11:47,619 --> 00:11:48,879
[Laughter]
332
00:11:48,969 --> 00:11:50,879
It's got all kinds of savvy tips
333
00:11:50,971 --> 00:11:54,191
on home repair,
organization, finance.
334
00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:56,538
I've been balancing my
checkbook all morning.
335
00:11:56,628 --> 00:11:58,018
All morning?
336
00:11:58,108 --> 00:11:59,758
It ain't easy,
sister know-it-all.
337
00:11:59,849 --> 00:12:01,199
[Laughter]
338
00:12:01,285 --> 00:12:04,065
So, do you stop
when you hit zero?
339
00:12:04,158 --> 00:12:05,678
No. They stop you.
340
00:12:05,768 --> 00:12:06,768
[Laughter]
341
00:12:08,684 --> 00:12:09,734
Hey, beautiful.
342
00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:12,857
Oh, I thought Dee
Dee was behind me.
343
00:12:12,949 --> 00:12:14,559
No. I was talking to you.
344
00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,385
If we're still on
for dinner tonight,
345
00:12:17,475 --> 00:12:18,865
I thought maybe we'd check out
346
00:12:18,955 --> 00:12:20,735
that new Italian
place, panzanella.
347
00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:22,587
I don't know. I don't think
we've known each other
348
00:12:22,611 --> 00:12:24,791
long enough for you
to see me eat spaghetti.
349
00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:26,664
[Laughter]
350
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,566
Mona, I think I can handle it.
351
00:12:28,660 --> 00:12:30,880
Then I'll see you at 7:00.
352
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,927
But just know, there
might be splatter.
353
00:12:33,013 --> 00:12:34,063
Don't wear white.
354
00:12:34,144 --> 00:12:35,284
[Laughter]
355
00:12:35,363 --> 00:12:36,543
[Introductory musical note]
356
00:12:39,628 --> 00:12:41,368
Whoa, where are your bagpipes?
357
00:12:41,456 --> 00:12:42,496
[Laughter]
358
00:12:42,587 --> 00:12:44,457
Hey, before you judge,
359
00:12:44,546 --> 00:12:46,806
gq had a huge
article about this look.
360
00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:48,376
"Mad about plaid."
361
00:12:48,463 --> 00:12:49,993
[Laughter]
362
00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:51,513
You're reading way too much.
363
00:12:52,728 --> 00:12:54,118
It's not so bad.
364
00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:55,778
I'd keep the
blazer and the shirt,
365
00:12:55,862 --> 00:12:56,912
and lose the pants.
366
00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:58,653
[Laughter]
367
00:12:58,734 --> 00:13:00,174
- Too basic?
- No.
368
00:13:00,257 --> 00:13:01,367
I just want you to walk
around with no pants.
369
00:13:01,389 --> 00:13:03,219
- [Elevator dings]
- [Laughter]
370
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:05,354
I need coffee. I
would've bought my own,
371
00:13:05,436 --> 00:13:07,396
but I'm on a freaking
budget. Yeah, I said it.
372
00:13:08,744 --> 00:13:10,704
Hey, nice flowers, Adam.
Who sent them to you?
373
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,750
Someone named Lorenzo.
374
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:14,875
He said he really
enjoyed your date.
375
00:13:14,968 --> 00:13:16,328
What? I was gonna
bring them to you
376
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:17,470
when the water started to smell.
377
00:13:17,492 --> 00:13:18,752
[Laughter]
378
00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:20,501
So, Mona,
379
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:22,192
things between
you and pastry dude
380
00:13:22,279 --> 00:13:23,669
are really blow-up-tuating.
381
00:13:23,759 --> 00:13:25,669
I don't know if I'd
say blow-up-tuating.
382
00:13:25,761 --> 00:13:26,981
Or if anyone else should.
383
00:13:27,067 --> 00:13:28,547
[Laughter]
384
00:13:28,633 --> 00:13:31,643
See, I like Lorenzo,
but he's the kind of guy
385
00:13:31,723 --> 00:13:33,293
who could have any
woman be wanted.
386
00:13:33,377 --> 00:13:35,377
And he wants you.
387
00:13:35,466 --> 00:13:38,076
Mona, the man's had two
weeks to dump you, and he hasn't.
388
00:13:38,165 --> 00:13:39,165
Live the miracle.
389
00:13:39,209 --> 00:13:40,519
[Laughter]
390
00:13:40,602 --> 00:13:41,842
Adam: He did call
twice this morning.
391
00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:43,044
He called?
392
00:13:43,126 --> 00:13:44,606
I even wrote it down
the second time.
393
00:13:44,693 --> 00:13:46,263
- [Laughter]
- Here.
394
00:13:48,262 --> 00:13:50,702
Mona, you've been buried
behind your desk so long,
395
00:13:50,786 --> 00:13:52,266
you've lost the
ability to recognize
396
00:13:52,353 --> 00:13:53,883
when a guy's feeling you.
397
00:13:53,963 --> 00:13:55,773
I'm sorry, but that outfit
is clouding my ability
398
00:13:55,791 --> 00:13:56,971
to take you seriously.
399
00:13:57,053 --> 00:13:58,053
[Laughter]
400
00:14:01,144 --> 00:14:03,154
So, how'd your returns go?
401
00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:07,283
Not good. Apparently, if
you pay with a credit card,
402
00:14:07,368 --> 00:14:09,758
it's against store policy
to give you a cash refund.
403
00:14:10,806 --> 00:14:11,886
I'm telling you,
404
00:14:11,981 --> 00:14:13,771
going to the mall with no money
405
00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,773
was like being in a war zone.
406
00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,765
Sprinting past
my favorite stores,
407
00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:20,247
dodging my regular
salespeople to avoid explaining
408
00:14:20,337 --> 00:14:22,187
they haven't heard from
their number one customer
409
00:14:22,209 --> 00:14:23,689
because I've been
captured by poverty
410
00:14:23,775 --> 00:14:25,135
and left to die in
a moneyless pit.
411
00:14:25,212 --> 00:14:26,542
So lose my number
and stop calling me!
412
00:14:26,561 --> 00:14:27,951
[Laughter]
413
00:14:28,041 --> 00:14:29,171
They call you?
414
00:14:29,259 --> 00:14:30,739
[Laughter]
415
00:14:30,826 --> 00:14:33,386
Mona, I have bills that
I actually have to open
416
00:14:33,481 --> 00:14:35,741
and a bank account
that's about to hit negative.
417
00:14:35,831 --> 00:14:37,701
Dee Dee, there's an option
418
00:14:37,789 --> 00:14:39,569
you obviously
haven't considered.
419
00:14:39,661 --> 00:14:41,051
Get a job.
420
00:14:42,316 --> 00:14:44,536
I've been looking for
months. What else you got?
421
00:14:44,622 --> 00:14:47,762
No, no, no. Not a law job,
an anything to pay the bills
422
00:14:47,843 --> 00:14:49,673
until you're in
front of a jury job.
423
00:14:49,758 --> 00:14:52,588
I mean, remember the real world
daddy was opening the door to?
424
00:14:52,674 --> 00:14:54,284
Well, this is it.
425
00:14:54,371 --> 00:14:56,901
And I would've suggested
it sooner, but I didn't.
426
00:14:56,983 --> 00:14:58,033
[Laughter]
427
00:14:59,289 --> 00:15:01,729
Well, thanks for letting me
struggle these last few days.
428
00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:03,693
My pleasure.
429
00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:05,512
- No, really, it has been.
- [Laughter]
430
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:07,040
[Introductory musical note]
431
00:15:09,038 --> 00:15:10,468
Lorenzo, how did you get...
432
00:15:11,562 --> 00:15:16,092
Wow! Candles and flowers
and... Ooh, did you vacuum?
433
00:15:16,176 --> 00:15:17,306
[Laughter]
434
00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:18,404
No. That was me.
435
00:15:20,093 --> 00:15:21,443
You owe me a hoover bag.
436
00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:23,099
[Laughter]
437
00:15:23,183 --> 00:15:25,073
Now, I'll just take a
couple of these cream puffs
438
00:15:25,098 --> 00:15:27,538
and my hopes for a grandbaby,
and leave you two alone.
439
00:15:27,622 --> 00:15:29,232
[Laughter]
440
00:15:29,319 --> 00:15:31,099
Hope you don't mind.
Your mom let me in.
441
00:15:31,191 --> 00:15:33,281
No, no. What woman
doesn't want to come home
442
00:15:33,367 --> 00:15:35,237
to a little chocolate
and brown sugar?
443
00:15:35,325 --> 00:15:37,405
Now, you talking about
me or the pastries?
444
00:15:37,501 --> 00:15:38,551
Both.
445
00:15:38,633 --> 00:15:40,553
[Laughter]
446
00:15:40,635 --> 00:15:42,475
Well, here, try this. It
has crème fraîcheinside.
447
00:15:42,506 --> 00:15:44,026
- It makes me think of you.
- Why?
448
00:15:44,117 --> 00:15:45,677
Because I'm soft in the middle?
449
00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:49,120
Because you're a sweet,
unexpected surprise.
450
00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:50,429
[Mona groans]
451
00:15:50,514 --> 00:15:52,304
I have something
else I want to share.
452
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,166
Now, I'm not much of a poet,
453
00:15:54,257 --> 00:15:55,257
but I was inspired.
454
00:15:56,694 --> 00:15:58,314
[Lorenzo scoffs]
455
00:15:58,392 --> 00:16:00,792
"Before I ever knew her
name, I knew she'd come along.
456
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:05,274
And now that I have found
her, I can put a name to my song.
457
00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:06,835
So, pardon, if I
lose my thoughts,
458
00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:08,402
forgive me if I stare,
459
00:16:08,489 --> 00:16:11,359
this is the fantasy I
knew before, is now her,
460
00:16:11,448 --> 00:16:13,018
standing there."
461
00:16:13,102 --> 00:16:15,542
Oh, that's really beautiful.
462
00:16:15,626 --> 00:16:16,626
Who's it about?
463
00:16:16,671 --> 00:16:17,721
[Laughter]
464
00:16:19,674 --> 00:16:21,814
You can't be
serious? It's about you.
465
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:22,893
Oh, please.
466
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:25,552
I'm nobody's fantasy.
467
00:16:25,636 --> 00:16:28,196
Mona, you are always
selling yourself short.
468
00:16:28,291 --> 00:16:30,211
Just try to accept
what I say for once.
469
00:16:30,293 --> 00:16:32,123
Take a compliment, woman.
470
00:16:32,208 --> 00:16:34,078
[Laughter]
471
00:16:34,167 --> 00:16:36,647
It's just when you
put me and fantasy
472
00:16:36,734 --> 00:16:39,134
- in the same sentence...
- So you can't stop?
473
00:16:39,215 --> 00:16:40,825
I mean, I tell you
I love your skin,
474
00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:42,132
you point out a pimple.
475
00:16:42,218 --> 00:16:43,698
I say you've got great hair,
476
00:16:43,785 --> 00:16:45,605
you dare me to run
my fingers through it.
477
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:46,920
[Laughter]
478
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:50,046
Ok, maybe I have
a bit of a problem.
479
00:16:50,139 --> 00:16:51,839
Maybe you do.
480
00:16:51,923 --> 00:16:54,193
I'm sorry, but this is who I am.
481
00:16:56,232 --> 00:16:57,232
I'm sorry, too.
482
00:16:59,148 --> 00:17:01,108
Mona, I have tried
to get close to you.
483
00:17:02,630 --> 00:17:05,420
But after weeks of running
into a wall, I give up.
484
00:17:05,502 --> 00:17:07,772
I can't be with somebody
485
00:17:07,852 --> 00:17:09,992
who doesn't feel they deserve
someone to be with them.
486
00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:13,205
[Sighs]
487
00:17:17,253 --> 00:17:18,253
[Mona stutters]
488
00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:23,348
The souffle will be
ready in six minutes.
489
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,393
Just dust with powdered
sugar and serve.
490
00:17:25,479 --> 00:17:26,649
[Laughter]
491
00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:30,532
[Introductory musical note]
492
00:17:35,445 --> 00:17:36,615
Caught ya.
493
00:17:36,707 --> 00:17:39,537
Oh! Mom, what
are you doing here?
494
00:17:39,623 --> 00:17:41,763
Same as you. Shopping
behind your father's back.
495
00:17:41,843 --> 00:17:43,323
And don't worry.
496
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:45,240
This will be a secret
just between us girls.
497
00:17:45,325 --> 00:17:47,195
Now, let's get
someone to help us.
498
00:17:47,283 --> 00:17:48,283
Sure.
499
00:17:50,591 --> 00:17:51,591
May I help you?
500
00:17:51,635 --> 00:17:52,845
[Laughter]
501
00:17:52,941 --> 00:17:54,421
Excuse me?
502
00:17:54,508 --> 00:17:56,158
I am that someone.
503
00:17:56,249 --> 00:17:57,689
I'm sorry. I don't understand.
504
00:17:57,772 --> 00:17:58,772
[Laughter]
505
00:18:00,035 --> 00:18:03,075
Mom, I applied for a
job, and I work here now.
506
00:18:03,169 --> 00:18:05,039
Has it come to this?
507
00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:07,557
My daughter, a shoe pusher.
508
00:18:07,651 --> 00:18:09,001
[Laughter]
509
00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:11,868
[Crying] My baby. A
working-class Thorne.
510
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:14,140
Oh, I can't... take it!
511
00:18:14,223 --> 00:18:15,623
[Laughter]
512
00:18:15,703 --> 00:18:16,703
No, really. Take it.
513
00:18:18,488 --> 00:18:22,098
Mom, I appreciate
what you're trying to do,
514
00:18:22,188 --> 00:18:24,228
but I'm an adult.
515
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:26,020
And I'm gonna get
by without your money.
516
00:18:27,323 --> 00:18:31,283
[Sucks teeth] I'm proud
of you, sweetness. Oh. Oh.
517
00:18:31,371 --> 00:18:33,071
You do make
commission here, right?
518
00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:34,895
- Yep.
- Then I'm in the mood to shop.
519
00:18:34,983 --> 00:18:36,943
I'll take the dior
pumps, the Gucci mules,
520
00:18:37,028 --> 00:18:38,768
and the manolos in every color.
521
00:18:38,856 --> 00:18:41,466
And I'll need this
giuseppe zanotti in a six.
522
00:18:41,555 --> 00:18:43,115
You don't wear a size six.
523
00:18:43,209 --> 00:18:44,649
I know, but you do.
524
00:18:46,081 --> 00:18:50,001
Mom, I've really got
to do this on my own.
525
00:18:50,085 --> 00:18:52,385
Dear, the customer's
always right.
526
00:18:55,090 --> 00:18:56,310
[Introductory musical note]
527
00:18:59,747 --> 00:19:02,177
So, no date with
Lorenzo tonight?
528
00:19:02,271 --> 00:19:04,971
Oh. That didn't work out.
529
00:19:05,056 --> 00:19:06,876
But he was such a great guy!
530
00:19:06,971 --> 00:19:08,281
Handsome, charming...
531
00:19:08,364 --> 00:19:10,114
Yeah, yeah. Just
didn't work out, ok?
532
00:19:10,192 --> 00:19:11,192
[Laughter]
533
00:19:12,281 --> 00:19:15,281
Wow. How things have changed.
534
00:19:15,371 --> 00:19:17,461
It's a Saturday night,
and I'm dragging in
535
00:19:17,547 --> 00:19:19,507
from a minimum
wage job, and you...
536
00:19:21,856 --> 00:19:23,806
[Laughter]
537
00:19:23,901 --> 00:19:25,771
I guess things haven't
changed all that much.
538
00:19:25,860 --> 00:19:26,900
[Laughter]
539
00:19:30,038 --> 00:19:31,298
Good night, Mona.
540
00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:32,947
Night, Dee Dee.
541
00:19:33,041 --> 00:19:34,431
You can do this, you know.
542
00:19:35,565 --> 00:19:36,565
I know.
543
00:19:37,872 --> 00:19:39,092
[Soft music]
544
00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:44,314
[Thinking] I didn't have
the nerve to tell my sister
545
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:47,360
I assassinated yet
another relationship.
546
00:19:47,447 --> 00:19:49,057
James Baldwin said,
547
00:19:49,144 --> 00:19:51,194
"not everything we
face can be changed,
548
00:19:51,277 --> 00:19:53,927
but nothing can be
changed unless we face it."
549
00:19:54,018 --> 00:19:55,798
So I'm facing it.
550
00:19:55,890 --> 00:19:57,980
I am so scared of getting hurt
551
00:19:58,066 --> 00:20:01,456
that I drive away anybody
who tries to get too close.
552
00:20:01,548 --> 00:20:03,158
It's funny how life
pushes us to grow
553
00:20:03,245 --> 00:20:05,465
whether we're ready to or not.
554
00:20:05,552 --> 00:20:07,082
Today, it became clear
555
00:20:07,162 --> 00:20:08,862
that if we're defeated
in our own minds,
556
00:20:08,946 --> 00:20:10,426
we've already lost the battle.
557
00:20:10,513 --> 00:20:12,783
Well, I am not going
down without a fight!
558
00:20:12,863 --> 00:20:15,083
Can I really change? Can anyone?
559
00:20:16,389 --> 00:20:20,219
Eager to hear from you,
searching in San Francisco.
560
00:20:20,306 --> 00:20:21,386
[Soft music continues]
561
00:20:25,659 --> 00:20:27,399
[Introductory theme song]
562
00:20:27,449 --> 00:20:31,999
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