All language subtitles for Def Comedy Jam s04e06.eng

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt-PT Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,441 --> 00:00:09,051 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 2 00:00:09,096 --> 00:00:12,136 KID CAPRI: It's the Russell Simmons' Def Comedy Jam. 3 00:00:35,209 --> 00:00:41,389 Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for my main man, Mr. Joe Torry. 4 00:00:42,694 --> 00:00:44,744 That's it! 5 00:00:44,783 --> 00:00:47,703 Shit! Y'all came up for laughs, let me hear you say, "Hell, yeah!" 6 00:00:47,743 --> 00:00:50,313 AUDIENCE: Hell, yeah!All right, then. 7 00:00:50,354 --> 00:00:52,184 Kid, we gonna rock this motherfucker? 8 00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:53,436 Indeed, brother man. 9 00:00:53,488 --> 00:00:55,228 Give Kid a round of applause. 10 00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:56,582 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 11 00:01:00,712 --> 00:01:03,502 Baddest DJ in the goddamn land. 12 00:01:03,541 --> 00:01:06,501 Just mixin' and doin' all the shit with your fingers, man. 13 00:01:06,544 --> 00:01:07,724 You are truly blessed. 14 00:01:08,938 --> 00:01:10,368 Fuck, I used to do that shit. 15 00:01:10,418 --> 00:01:12,198 I broke my finger doin' that shit one time. 16 00:01:12,246 --> 00:01:15,076 Cheap-ass goddamn turntable. 17 00:01:15,118 --> 00:01:17,768 Shit, we gonna have fun in this motherfucker. 18 00:01:17,816 --> 00:01:19,726 Fun, as I'm happy and shit. 19 00:01:19,775 --> 00:01:21,905 Happy as a motherfucker 'cause I just got my own shit back. 20 00:01:21,951 --> 00:01:23,471 My own crib, you know what I'm sayin'? 21 00:01:23,518 --> 00:01:26,168 I kicked my little brother out the motherfucker. 22 00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:28,176 'Cause everybody know they got an old, worthless-ass relative 23 00:01:28,218 --> 00:01:30,348 they don't like to fuck with. 24 00:01:30,394 --> 00:01:32,054 And this motherfucker be wearin' my shit, you know what I'm saying? 25 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,832 When I'm out of town? 26 00:01:33,876 --> 00:01:35,046 Stay on the road a lot and then try to clean my shit 27 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,265 and put it back in the closet 28 00:01:37,271 --> 00:01:39,711 before I get back. 29 00:01:39,751 --> 00:01:42,451 But he's stupid 'cause he's left-handed and put my shit back, you know, this way. 30 00:01:42,493 --> 00:01:44,503 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 31 00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:47,409 And I'm like, "Motherfucker, you ain't foolin' me!" 32 00:01:47,455 --> 00:01:49,145 That's why there ain't nothin'... 33 00:01:49,196 --> 00:01:50,586 When you got your own shit, there ain't nothin' like it now, 34 00:01:50,632 --> 00:01:52,162 so you can do what the fuck you want to. 35 00:01:52,199 --> 00:01:53,679 Am I bullshittin'? When you got your own shit... 36 00:01:53,722 --> 00:01:54,722 [AUDIENCE APPLAUDING] 37 00:01:55,898 --> 00:01:59,078 ...can't nobody tell you shit. 38 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:00,859 You can do anything you want to. 39 00:02:00,903 --> 00:02:02,693 You can thump a book on the motherfuckin' wall, pow! 40 00:02:02,731 --> 00:02:04,521 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 41 00:02:04,559 --> 00:02:06,739 Walkin' around naked. Use the hot water, cold water, 42 00:02:06,778 --> 00:02:09,038 play the radio, any-fuckin'-thing you want to. 43 00:02:09,085 --> 00:02:11,305 You ain't gotta worry about nobody telling you shit 'cause it's your crib. 44 00:02:11,348 --> 00:02:13,048 Walkin' around just butt-naked. 45 00:02:13,089 --> 00:02:14,919 Ain't gotta worry about nobody arguin' with your ass, 46 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:16,920 'cause you're arguin' with your damn self. 47 00:02:16,962 --> 00:02:18,402 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 48 00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:19,922 Be like, "Joe, who ate up all the damn food? 49 00:02:19,965 --> 00:02:21,395 "You did, you stupid motherfucker." 50 00:02:21,445 --> 00:02:23,225 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 51 00:02:23,273 --> 00:02:25,233 Ain't gotta worry about nobody beggin' you for no goddamn money. 52 00:02:25,275 --> 00:02:27,355 You can beg from your damn self. 53 00:02:27,408 --> 00:02:29,978 I do it all the time. I'd be like, "Joe, loan me five dollars." 54 00:02:32,674 --> 00:02:33,944 And there you go. 55 00:02:33,979 --> 00:02:36,419 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING AND APPLAUDING] 56 00:02:36,460 --> 00:02:40,030 You gotta worry about paying myself back. Shit! 57 00:02:40,072 --> 00:02:42,602 And they... I know everybody here, because I had my class reunion, 58 00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:44,560 like, you know, last year and shit. 59 00:02:44,599 --> 00:02:46,249 You know what I'm sayin'? You know, 10-year class reunion? 60 00:02:46,296 --> 00:02:48,256 Go to your class reunion. 61 00:02:48,298 --> 00:02:49,558 Go to your goddamn class reunion. 62 00:02:49,604 --> 00:02:51,134 You never even go to that shit, 63 00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:53,911 so you know how it'll be 10 years later. 64 00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:55,216 I went to my class reunion, it was fucked up. 65 00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:56,262 Half of the people ain't even come. 66 00:02:56,306 --> 00:02:58,476 I'm like, "Ain't this a bitch?" 67 00:02:58,526 --> 00:03:00,046 They up there talkin' about, "We don't know it was the class reunion." 68 00:03:01,006 --> 00:03:03,046 Fuckin' 10 years. 69 00:03:03,095 --> 00:03:05,785 '83, '93. What the fuck? You can't count this shit? 70 00:03:05,837 --> 00:03:07,537 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 71 00:03:07,578 --> 00:03:09,578 Then they come up with this shit, "We ain't had the money." 72 00:03:09,624 --> 00:03:10,934 Fuck you ain't had the money. 73 00:03:10,973 --> 00:03:13,283 It costs $50, y'all. $50. 74 00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:15,413 Fifty goddamn dollars took care of the whole weekend. 75 00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:17,984 The shit... Party on Friday night. 76 00:03:18,023 --> 00:03:19,723 Gettin' to know a motherfucker. 77 00:03:19,764 --> 00:03:22,644 The banquet dance, dinner, all you can do. Shit, Saturday 78 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:25,070 and then the picnic Sunday. $50. 79 00:03:25,814 --> 00:03:26,994 Ten years... 80 00:03:29,426 --> 00:03:30,986 ...and you ain't got $50. 81 00:03:31,036 --> 00:03:32,296 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 82 00:03:32,342 --> 00:03:34,302 That's five dollars a goddamn year. 83 00:03:35,954 --> 00:03:37,484 What the fuck is you doin'? 84 00:03:37,521 --> 00:03:40,001 Some motherfuckers still stay at home with Mama. 85 00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:41,175 And I could see if Mama was sick, 86 00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:42,311 but Mama's sick of your ass. 87 00:03:42,352 --> 00:03:43,572 Get the fuck out the house. 88 00:03:45,312 --> 00:03:47,142 Goddamn! 89 00:03:47,183 --> 00:03:48,793 This shit is a motherfuckin' trip. 90 00:03:48,837 --> 00:03:50,527 Goddamn, what the fuck is goin' on right here? 91 00:03:50,578 --> 00:03:52,228 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 92 00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:55,495 Goddamn. What the fuck? Is y'all in a gang or somethin'? 93 00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:57,239 What's that? The Buffalo Gang? What's on it? 94 00:03:58,629 --> 00:03:59,889 Wassup? Is that real shit? 95 00:03:59,935 --> 00:04:01,455 MAN: Yeah. 96 00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:03,332 Shit, give me a shout-out. What's your name, man? 97 00:04:03,373 --> 00:04:04,643 I want to give y'all a shout if y'all cool. What's that? 98 00:04:04,679 --> 00:04:05,719 That's Bud, I'm Tangy. 99 00:04:05,767 --> 00:04:06,987 JOE: That's Bud and Tangy. 100 00:04:07,029 --> 00:04:08,469 I'm Tangy. I'm Tangy.You Tangy? 101 00:04:08,509 --> 00:04:09,899 Tangy.MAN: I'm Buttwheat. 102 00:04:09,945 --> 00:04:11,025 You Buckwheat? 103 00:04:11,076 --> 00:04:12,556 Buttwheat.JOE: Buttwheat. 104 00:04:13,296 --> 00:04:14,426 Buttwheat. 105 00:04:14,471 --> 00:04:15,691 Buttwheat. 106 00:04:15,733 --> 00:04:17,083 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 107 00:04:17,648 --> 00:04:18,998 Tawolata. 108 00:04:20,347 --> 00:04:21,517 I ain't... What? 109 00:04:21,565 --> 00:04:22,605 They told us we was goin' to eat. 110 00:04:22,653 --> 00:04:24,183 You was gonna eat?Yeah. 111 00:04:24,220 --> 00:04:25,440 What the fuck you gonna eat? Us? 112 00:04:25,482 --> 00:04:26,832 [AUDIENCE APPLAUDING AND LAUGHING] 113 00:04:29,225 --> 00:04:31,835 Where the fuck you get some food at a comedy show from? 114 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:33,710 When you gonna eat? Motherfucker, you know you got a pizza 115 00:04:33,751 --> 00:04:36,281 in your back pocket right now. 116 00:04:36,319 --> 00:04:38,929 I help... I help your ass out after the show, all right? 117 00:04:38,974 --> 00:04:40,324 Don't you get tired of eating, man? 118 00:04:40,367 --> 00:04:42,237 Not today.Not today? You either. 119 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,542 Who's this motherfucker? That bodyguard? 120 00:04:43,587 --> 00:04:45,367 That's my bodyguard. Baby Face Buggs. 121 00:04:45,415 --> 00:04:47,585 [JOE LAUGHS] 122 00:04:47,635 --> 00:04:49,845 Motherfucker ain't got no goddamn baby face. It's like an old ass man. 123 00:04:49,898 --> 00:04:51,808 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 124 00:04:51,856 --> 00:04:53,156 Some baby face. Y'all do anything for attention, won't you? 125 00:04:54,511 --> 00:04:56,341 Goddamn! 126 00:04:56,383 --> 00:04:58,473 Y'all got a bench back there in that row or just seats and shit? 127 00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:04,653 Y'all motherfuckers fuckin' them chairs up, man. 128 00:05:06,349 --> 00:05:10,309 Gonna charge y'all a weight fee in this motherfucker. 129 00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:13,103 Calm down, man, don't fuck up the cameras and shit, man, all right? 130 00:05:13,835 --> 00:05:14,965 Goddamn! 131 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:17,843 Chup, chup, chup, chup, chup, chup. 132 00:05:17,882 --> 00:05:19,882 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 133 00:05:19,928 --> 00:05:22,758 Y'all in my crowd and y'all my posse tonight, all right? 134 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,370 All right now, man. Yeah, I don't want y'all to participate, 135 00:05:24,411 --> 00:05:26,331 'cause I do some shit, 136 00:05:26,369 --> 00:05:28,019 you know, before I start the show. Some different shit now. 137 00:05:28,850 --> 00:05:30,720 Y'all gotta be with me. 138 00:05:30,765 --> 00:05:32,235 If they get out of line, y'all help me, all right? Y'all fuck 'em up. 139 00:05:33,028 --> 00:05:34,418 Here we go. 140 00:05:34,464 --> 00:05:38,994 Are y'all ready for the next comedian? 141 00:05:39,034 --> 00:05:41,384 ALL: Yeah. Is he funny? 142 00:05:41,428 --> 00:05:43,948 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 143 00:05:43,995 --> 00:05:46,775 Hell, yeah! Back to do it again, from Detroit, 144 00:05:46,824 --> 00:05:48,484 give it up for Tommy Chunn! 145 00:05:51,655 --> 00:05:52,865 [CHEERING] 146 00:05:58,488 --> 00:06:00,358 Yeah! Keep it goin'! Wassup? 147 00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:03,541 Y'all all right?AUDIENCE: Yeah! 148 00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:05,580 Yeah, you know this. 149 00:06:05,626 --> 00:06:07,886 Hell, man. That's great, man. 150 00:06:07,932 --> 00:06:10,152 I'm glad to be here, y'all. I like being a comedian in the '90s, you know? 151 00:06:10,195 --> 00:06:12,365 You know why? 'Cause I work for myself. 152 00:06:12,415 --> 00:06:14,805 'Cause I hate workin' for other people 'cause I'm an entrepreneur, you know. 153 00:06:14,852 --> 00:06:17,162 'Cause we work for other people that have crazy rules. 154 00:06:17,202 --> 00:06:20,162 They got this one rule called "two weeks' notice." Y'all heard of that shit? 155 00:06:20,205 --> 00:06:22,335 That's some bullshit, ain't it? 156 00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,912 'Cause if you quit the job, you obviously don't give a fuck no more. 157 00:06:24,949 --> 00:06:26,649 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 158 00:06:26,690 --> 00:06:28,210 It's like, "Yeah, this time I quit. 159 00:06:28,257 --> 00:06:29,817 "No, no, no. I ain't comin' in." 160 00:06:29,867 --> 00:06:31,777 "Well, you know you owe us that two weeks' notice?" 161 00:06:31,826 --> 00:06:33,736 "Well, how about you notice I'm not at that motherfucker... 162 00:06:33,784 --> 00:06:35,054 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 163 00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:37,270 "...for two weeks?" 164 00:06:37,309 --> 00:06:39,489 "I don't think he's coming in. 165 00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:40,749 "He's not here yet. 166 00:06:43,533 --> 00:06:45,673 "It's already Wednesday. Where is the guy? 167 00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:49,625 "Where is he?" 168 00:06:53,195 --> 00:06:54,975 And I like comedy 'cause when you're a comedian, you know, 169 00:06:55,023 --> 00:06:57,073 you meet fine ladies, you know? 170 00:06:57,112 --> 00:06:58,902 'Cause women like you when you funny. You know what I'm sayin'? 171 00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,990 You know, 'cause you ain't gotta be that good lookin', 172 00:07:01,029 --> 00:07:02,419 and you don't. 173 00:07:02,465 --> 00:07:04,815 [AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING] 174 00:07:04,859 --> 00:07:07,119 No, no, no. You ain't gotta have a lot of money, you know, just be funny, right. 175 00:07:07,165 --> 00:07:09,905 Shit, I keep the women laughin' from the club all the way to my house. 176 00:07:09,951 --> 00:07:12,131 They be like, "Tommy, you so crazy! 177 00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:13,690 "You so funny. 178 00:07:13,737 --> 00:07:15,437 [LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY] 179 00:07:18,350 --> 00:07:20,350 "You funny... 180 00:07:20,396 --> 00:07:21,436 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 181 00:07:22,877 --> 00:07:25,917 "Write some new shit. Do an ad lib. 182 00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:29,227 "Hit a punchline. You gonna be big one day. 183 00:07:29,274 --> 00:07:30,584 "Shit, you big now. 184 00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:34,670 "Do some shit. 185 00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:38,459 "Ad lib." 186 00:07:40,285 --> 00:07:41,895 'Cause I had a woman say some shit to me one time 187 00:07:41,939 --> 00:07:43,329 I never heard in my whole life, y'all. 188 00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:45,155 She made me feel like a little kid, man. 189 00:07:45,203 --> 00:07:46,733 We was throwin' down, right? 190 00:07:46,770 --> 00:07:48,820 I had my rhythm goin' and you know how you, 191 00:07:48,859 --> 00:07:51,339 when you fuckin', you gotta have your mood music, you know what I'm sayin'? 192 00:07:51,383 --> 00:07:54,083 You know you gotta have your... I had on some old Marvin Gaye, 193 00:07:54,125 --> 00:07:55,865 some Otis Redding, threw on some Jodeci, fuck it. 194 00:07:55,910 --> 00:07:58,700 I even put on some Garth Brooks, yo. 195 00:07:58,739 --> 00:08:00,179 'Cause how do you fuck to country music? 196 00:08:00,218 --> 00:08:01,478 What's the rhythm on that? You be like... 197 00:08:02,786 --> 00:08:04,396 [IMITATING COUNTRY MUSIC] 198 00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:09,446 I just started square-dancing on the pussy. 199 00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:10,489 I'm like... [IMITATING COUNTRY MUSIC] 200 00:08:11,665 --> 00:08:13,575 [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE] 201 00:08:27,115 --> 00:08:29,155 I'm puttin' the achy-breaky on that motherfucker. 202 00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:34,250 So check it out. 203 00:08:34,296 --> 00:08:36,686 So I'm throwin' down, you know, I'm workin' it. 204 00:08:36,733 --> 00:08:38,473 And she says some shit to me I never heard in my life. 205 00:08:38,518 --> 00:08:40,958 She said, "Go ahead, Tommy. That's right. 206 00:08:40,998 --> 00:08:43,868 "Wash the dishes, cut the grass, rake the leaves, 207 00:08:43,914 --> 00:08:46,354 "clean the whole damn house!" 208 00:08:46,395 --> 00:08:49,525 Next thing I knew I was outside naked with a bucket and a squeegee. 209 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,010 I'm cuttin' the grass. 210 00:08:53,750 --> 00:08:55,840 Trimmin' the hedges and shit, 211 00:08:55,883 --> 00:08:57,583 tuck-pointin' the bricks on the house. 212 00:08:57,624 --> 00:09:00,504 She goin', "No, fool! Back in the house! Back in the house!" 213 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,630 So I jumped back on, you know I did. 214 00:09:02,672 --> 00:09:05,112 Now she started cryin'. Do you ever have them start cryin'? 215 00:09:05,153 --> 00:09:06,683 Probably not. 216 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:08,110 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 217 00:09:08,156 --> 00:09:09,156 But that's all right. 218 00:09:10,898 --> 00:09:14,468 I said, "What's wrong?" She's like, [SOBBING] "No, no, no." 219 00:09:14,510 --> 00:09:16,600 I said, "What's wrong? Am I hurtin' you?" 220 00:09:16,643 --> 00:09:17,993 She said, "No, it's not that you're hurtin' me, 221 00:09:18,035 --> 00:09:20,295 "it's just that you're fucking me. 222 00:09:20,342 --> 00:09:22,872 "Don't fuck me. Make love to me." 223 00:09:23,693 --> 00:09:25,223 I said, "Huh?" 224 00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:27,310 [PANTING] 225 00:09:27,349 --> 00:09:28,789 I said, "Make love. Okay, make love." So I start doin' circles. 226 00:09:28,829 --> 00:09:30,829 I said, "Is this love? 227 00:09:30,874 --> 00:09:35,014 "Is that love?" She said, "No." I said, "Is that love? 228 00:09:35,052 --> 00:09:37,012 "Is that love? That ain't love?" I said, "Fuck it. 229 00:09:39,187 --> 00:09:40,707 "Is that love? Is that love?" 230 00:09:40,754 --> 00:09:43,504 She said, "No." I said, "Damn it. Is that love? 231 00:09:43,539 --> 00:09:44,669 "That ain't love?" I said, "Fuck. 232 00:09:46,063 --> 00:09:47,463 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 233 00:09:49,806 --> 00:09:51,196 "That ain't love?" I said, "Damn it." 234 00:09:54,898 --> 00:09:57,028 [AUDIENCE SCREAMING]And she said, "That's love." 235 00:09:57,074 --> 00:09:58,644 Thank you very much. I'm Tommy Chunn. 236 00:09:58,685 --> 00:10:00,295 Peace out! 237 00:10:01,165 --> 00:10:02,505 [CHEERING] 238 00:10:08,999 --> 00:10:10,479 Tommy Chunn in the house! 239 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,001 Tommy Chunn in the house! 240 00:10:14,526 --> 00:10:16,526 Pass that back to them motherfuckers, man! 241 00:10:16,572 --> 00:10:17,572 [CROWD LAUGHING] 242 00:10:18,574 --> 00:10:19,664 Pass that shit back! 243 00:10:23,057 --> 00:10:25,147 I got some good shit. 244 00:10:25,189 --> 00:10:28,719 Them fruit is gonna wash all that fat out, y'all, all right? 245 00:10:30,673 --> 00:10:32,763 Fuck 'em. Y'all with me now. 246 00:10:35,765 --> 00:10:37,585 Motherfucker, take the peel off. Don't eat the whole banana. 247 00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:38,677 Goddamn! 248 00:10:38,725 --> 00:10:40,065 [INDISTINCT TALKING] 249 00:10:43,555 --> 00:10:44,555 Goddamn! 250 00:10:48,430 --> 00:10:49,430 Where the sausage? 251 00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:53,999 He want to know where the sausage at. 252 00:10:54,044 --> 00:10:55,444 Pull one of your fingers off. 253 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:56,480 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 254 00:11:01,269 --> 00:11:03,749 [INDISTINCT TALKING] 255 00:11:03,793 --> 00:11:05,143 Don't talk with your mouth full, now. 256 00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:08,929 Want some water? Okay. Comin' on the way. 257 00:11:08,972 --> 00:11:10,022 Got some water comin' on the way. 258 00:11:10,060 --> 00:11:11,540 BUTTWHEAT: Juice.Juice? 259 00:11:11,583 --> 00:11:12,933 Yeah.JOE: Diet juice? 260 00:11:12,976 --> 00:11:14,936 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 261 00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:16,498 What about a glass of SlimFast? 262 00:11:16,545 --> 00:11:18,285 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 263 00:11:18,329 --> 00:11:19,589 Couple of diet cherries? 264 00:11:19,635 --> 00:11:21,375 [INDISTINCT] 265 00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:23,119 Okay, okay, okay. Got you covered. Got you covered. 266 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:25,290 [ROLLS TONGUE] Got you covered. 267 00:11:25,336 --> 00:11:27,116 Y'all still with me. 268 00:11:27,164 --> 00:11:29,214 This guy is originally from Chicago, Illinois, 269 00:11:29,253 --> 00:11:30,953 but he now lives in Atlanta, Georgia. 270 00:11:30,994 --> 00:11:32,914 Give it up for Don "DC" Curry! 271 00:11:35,999 --> 00:11:36,999 [CHEERING] 272 00:11:42,527 --> 00:11:44,137 What's happenin', y'all? 273 00:11:44,181 --> 00:11:45,971 I'm 35 and I'm regular. 274 00:11:46,009 --> 00:11:48,009 I talk about regular stuff. 275 00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:50,095 I'm from the regular days. 276 00:11:50,144 --> 00:11:52,764 Back when your mama had all of your living room furniture 277 00:11:52,799 --> 00:11:55,279 covered with that hard-ass plastic. 278 00:11:55,323 --> 00:11:58,073 You sit down, it be pokin' you in the thigh and snaggin' 279 00:11:58,108 --> 00:11:59,808 your polyester bell bottoms. 280 00:11:59,849 --> 00:12:02,499 Back in the days of shag carpet about this tall, 281 00:12:02,547 --> 00:12:04,107 you had to step over in it. 282 00:12:04,158 --> 00:12:06,808 Patent leather loafers and knitted armrests. 283 00:12:06,856 --> 00:12:08,726 Crushed velvet curtains. 284 00:12:08,771 --> 00:12:11,121 Back in the days when your mama had a dining room table 285 00:12:11,165 --> 00:12:14,205 weigh about 5,000 damn pounds. 286 00:12:14,255 --> 00:12:16,685 She was determined wasn't nobody gonna scratch it or nothing, 287 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:19,086 had it covered up with eight or nine covers, 288 00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:21,439 a sheet of plastic cover, 289 00:12:21,479 --> 00:12:25,529 four or five table cloths and that country-ass lace cover on the top of that? 290 00:12:25,570 --> 00:12:28,140 Oh, the fan used to try to blow the lace cover off, 291 00:12:28,182 --> 00:12:31,322 but that big-ass punch bowl used to hold it down. 292 00:12:31,359 --> 00:12:35,449 That punch bowl with about 200 little cups going around the edge of it. 293 00:12:35,493 --> 00:12:38,583 Back in the days when you had carpet on the walls. 294 00:12:38,627 --> 00:12:40,497 Big wooden fork and spoons. 295 00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:42,072 I thought we had it goin' on. 296 00:12:42,109 --> 00:12:43,239 [APPLAUSE] 297 00:12:43,284 --> 00:12:44,684 I didn't know we was poor. 298 00:12:45,677 --> 00:12:47,587 Mama camouflaged it. 299 00:12:47,636 --> 00:12:49,856 Hell, I thought it was artwork hanging all over the house. 300 00:12:49,899 --> 00:12:53,509 I was grown before I realized it wasn't nothing but some souvenir plates. 301 00:12:53,555 --> 00:12:54,945 Mama done went to flea markets 302 00:12:54,991 --> 00:12:56,821 and bought plates other folks didn't want. 303 00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:58,043 Still had writings on them, 304 00:12:58,081 --> 00:12:59,821 "See Spain. See Italy." 305 00:12:59,866 --> 00:13:02,516 We ain't been outside the state line. 306 00:13:02,564 --> 00:13:05,184 Had a china closet like middle class folk 307 00:13:05,219 --> 00:13:07,219 and never could afford no china. 308 00:13:07,264 --> 00:13:10,924 China closet just full of stolen salt and pepper shakers. 309 00:13:10,964 --> 00:13:13,794 Wherever we happen to go, Mama steal a salt and pepper shaker. 310 00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:15,526 Just drop 'em in her purse. 311 00:13:15,577 --> 00:13:18,057 They still had little names on them, "the Waffle House," 312 00:13:18,101 --> 00:13:19,891 "the Pancake House," 313 00:13:19,929 --> 00:13:22,319 "Macedonia Baptist Church." She didn't give a damn. 314 00:13:22,366 --> 00:13:23,846 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 315 00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:26,110 The Jones family reunion. Our name was Curry. 316 00:13:27,458 --> 00:13:29,328 Here's the thing that matters, 317 00:13:29,373 --> 00:13:31,253 these raggedy cars on the highway. 318 00:13:31,288 --> 00:13:34,288 Oh, you can't hardly go nowhere on the highway now. 319 00:13:34,335 --> 00:13:35,985 You ever been on the highway just ridin', 320 00:13:36,032 --> 00:13:38,772 here come a raggedy car behind you with one headlight? 321 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:42,868 You think it's a motorcycle until it get up on the side of you. 322 00:13:42,909 --> 00:13:47,349 Be runnin' about 100 miles an hour with the car shaken, he tremblin'. 323 00:13:47,391 --> 00:13:49,521 Then he pull over in front of you and slow down. 324 00:13:49,567 --> 00:13:52,567 Oh, I'd like to just set his ass on fire. 325 00:13:52,614 --> 00:13:54,054 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 326 00:13:54,094 --> 00:13:57,144 Usually a Cadillac, about a '68, '69 model, 327 00:13:57,184 --> 00:14:00,274 be smokin' like he's sellin' barbecue? 328 00:14:00,317 --> 00:14:03,577 He be leanin' one way, the car be leanin' the other way. 329 00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:06,145 Be a photo Cadillac with three tinted windows? 330 00:14:07,150 --> 00:14:09,460 Three hubcaps missing. 331 00:14:09,500 --> 00:14:13,030 A rear spare tire on the back of the trunk with a hubcap on it. 332 00:14:13,069 --> 00:14:15,029 Windshield wipers just screechin' like hell 333 00:14:15,071 --> 00:14:17,121 'cause there ain't no rubber on the blade? 334 00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:20,820 A coat hanger in the hole where the antenna ought to damn be? 335 00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:23,820 Big dirty baby shoes danglin' from the mirror. 336 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:26,953 Big country fur dice glued to the dashboard. 337 00:14:26,996 --> 00:14:29,736 Raggedy-ass vinyl top hanging off just wavin' at you. 338 00:14:29,781 --> 00:14:31,871 [BLOWS] 339 00:14:31,914 --> 00:14:35,664 Be a pair of drawers in the gas tank where the gas cap ought to be? 340 00:14:35,700 --> 00:14:41,490 Then there's a cardboard sign in the back window talkin' about stolen tags. Right. 341 00:14:41,532 --> 00:14:44,622 You know ain't nobody stole nothin' off this piece of shit. 342 00:14:44,666 --> 00:14:45,926 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 343 00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:48,282 If they did, they just stole it back. 344 00:14:48,322 --> 00:14:52,502 Every time I go through a drive-through I get behind that raggedy car. 345 00:14:52,543 --> 00:14:54,813 Two or three cars in front of him. 346 00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:57,370 He'll turn his car off trying to save gas 347 00:14:57,418 --> 00:14:59,588 'cause of the line moving too slow. 348 00:14:59,637 --> 00:15:02,377 Ten seconds later, the line move and he can't get that 349 00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:04,213 raggedy car cranked. 350 00:15:04,251 --> 00:15:06,991 Folks behind me blowin'. I can't damn move. 351 00:15:07,036 --> 00:15:09,996 He'll ask me do I have some jumper cables. 352 00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:11,869 "You got the raggedy-ass car! 353 00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:14,261 "Think I just ride around to give you a jump?" 354 00:15:14,304 --> 00:15:15,924 I said, "Jump in between these cars. 355 00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:18,128 "Let me smash your silly ass!" 356 00:15:18,178 --> 00:15:20,218 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 357 00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:21,747 If you got a raggedy car... 358 00:15:23,052 --> 00:15:24,362 I'm Don Curry, y'all people. 359 00:15:25,315 --> 00:15:26,575 [AUDIENCE CHEERING] 360 00:15:27,752 --> 00:15:28,752 [MUSIC PLAYING] 361 00:15:55,476 --> 00:15:56,476 [ALL CHEERING] 362 00:15:59,654 --> 00:16:03,094 Right on, motherfuckers. "DC" Don Curry, y'all. Give it up for him, now. 363 00:16:04,964 --> 00:16:05,974 Hell, yeah! 364 00:16:09,011 --> 00:16:11,141 All right! So are y'all ready? 365 00:16:12,710 --> 00:16:15,410 And it's a she, so y'all gotta say "she" now. 366 00:16:15,452 --> 00:16:19,802 Are y'all ready for the next comedienne? 367 00:16:19,848 --> 00:16:22,198 AUDIENCE: Yeah! Is she funny? 368 00:16:24,244 --> 00:16:27,164 From Houston, Texas, sexy as hell, Montanna Taylor. 369 00:16:33,427 --> 00:16:35,597 Wassup, New York? 370 00:16:35,646 --> 00:16:38,206 Damn it, I came a long way. You gotta be louder than that. 371 00:16:38,258 --> 00:16:39,478 Wassup, New York? 372 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:42,090 AUDIENCE: Wassup?All right! 373 00:16:42,131 --> 00:16:43,961 Ladies, the men always come out here 374 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,873 and say, "Let's give it up for the ladies." So, ladies, 375 00:16:45,917 --> 00:16:47,477 let's give it up for the men in the house. 376 00:16:47,528 --> 00:16:49,008 [AUDIENCE APPLAUDING] 377 00:16:49,051 --> 00:16:51,231 Joe Torry and Kid Capri, give it up for 'em! 378 00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:54,490 See, 'cause I'm lookin' for me a man, 379 00:16:54,535 --> 00:16:56,965 'cause before I left Texas, my boyfriend broke up with me 380 00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,966 and it took him two weeks to do it. 381 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:01,018 Not that he didn't have the courage, 382 00:17:01,063 --> 00:17:03,413 it's just that he stutters and it took him two weeks to do it. 383 00:17:03,457 --> 00:17:04,677 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 384 00:17:04,719 --> 00:17:08,289 He said, "I found me [STUTTERING] 385 00:17:08,331 --> 00:17:12,811 "another girlfriend and she look... She look better than you." 386 00:17:12,857 --> 00:17:15,817 And he wasn't lying. I saw him at a party and his girl was gorgeous. 387 00:17:15,860 --> 00:17:19,170 I said, "Damn. What she see in his stutterin' ass?" 388 00:17:19,212 --> 00:17:21,082 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 389 00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:23,087 I said, "Oh, well, you two have a nice time." 390 00:17:23,129 --> 00:17:25,039 I said, "Miss, it was nice meetin' you. What was your name?" 391 00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:27,127 She said, [STUTTERING] "Mmm..." 392 00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:28,736 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 393 00:17:31,441 --> 00:17:33,401 Single woman. I still live with my grandmother 394 00:17:33,443 --> 00:17:35,143 'cause I don't make enough money to live on my own, 395 00:17:35,184 --> 00:17:37,364 but every time I save up enough money to move, 396 00:17:37,404 --> 00:17:40,104 she try to scare me talkin' about if somebody break in on me, 397 00:17:40,146 --> 00:17:41,966 she ain't goin' to be there to protect me. 398 00:17:42,017 --> 00:17:43,887 Please. My grandmother is 87, 399 00:17:44,715 --> 00:17:46,235 to the second power. 400 00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:48,022 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 401 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:49,627 If somebody broke in on me now, 402 00:17:49,677 --> 00:17:51,417 I can just see her tryin' to rescue me. 403 00:17:51,461 --> 00:17:53,941 I'd be like, "Grandma, help! Somebody chokin' me!" 404 00:17:53,985 --> 00:17:57,285 "Okay, baby. Mama comin'. Hmm. 405 00:17:57,337 --> 00:18:02,387 "Let me get the gun. Lord, ain't no bullets in this gun. Mmm-hmm. 406 00:18:02,429 --> 00:18:07,479 "Okay, I'm coming. You leave my grandbaby alone 'for I... 407 00:18:07,521 --> 00:18:09,701 "Lord, I still got on my night clothes. 408 00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:12,310 "Can't let the man see me like this." 409 00:18:12,352 --> 00:18:13,532 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 410 00:18:16,007 --> 00:18:17,177 Where my single ladies at? 411 00:18:17,226 --> 00:18:18,786 [CHEERING AND APPLAUSE] 412 00:18:21,970 --> 00:18:22,970 Oh, that's all? 413 00:18:24,407 --> 00:18:26,447 All the rest of you cows got men? 414 00:18:27,932 --> 00:18:29,502 Where they at? 415 00:18:29,543 --> 00:18:31,243 I tell you where they at. They at home like this, 416 00:18:31,284 --> 00:18:32,684 "Oh, she went to the Def Jam,baby. 417 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,370 "We got plenty of time, shit." 418 00:18:34,417 --> 00:18:35,507 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 419 00:18:40,423 --> 00:18:43,433 But, single ladies, don't you hate the guys that ask you for sex 420 00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:46,170 just because they do nice things for you? Doesn't that piss you off? 421 00:18:46,212 --> 00:18:48,522 WOMEN: Yeah!You know, the type of guys, 422 00:18:48,562 --> 00:18:51,352 "Huh. If I come over there and help you move your furniture, 423 00:18:51,391 --> 00:18:52,481 "what you gonna give me? 424 00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,093 "If I come over there and fix your VCR, 425 00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:57,305 "what you gonna give me?" 426 00:18:58,267 --> 00:19:00,437 Men, don't do that. 427 00:19:00,487 --> 00:19:02,007 Don't ask a woman for sex just because you do something nice for her. 428 00:19:02,053 --> 00:19:04,753 We not gonna give it to you, right, ladies? 429 00:19:04,795 --> 00:19:06,925 But we might give you a coochie coupon. 430 00:19:06,971 --> 00:19:07,971 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 431 00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,760 You don't believe me? Go up to your girl in the mornin' and say, 432 00:19:15,806 --> 00:19:18,106 "Hey, babe. I went ahead and paid your rent for you. Don't worry about it." 433 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:19,937 Shoot. Coochie coupon. 434 00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:20,994 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 435 00:19:24,467 --> 00:19:27,207 Ain't no expiration date on it. 436 00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:30,473 I had a man so good to me, I gave his ass a coochie credit card. 437 00:19:30,517 --> 00:19:32,687 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 438 00:19:32,736 --> 00:19:35,256 But I had to take it back though 'cause his ass was married. 439 00:19:35,304 --> 00:19:37,224 That's another thing, them married men sneak up on you. 440 00:19:37,263 --> 00:19:38,443 I met his ass in a nightclub. 441 00:19:38,481 --> 00:19:39,961 That's why I don't go no more, 442 00:19:40,004 --> 00:19:41,664 because I think they have the concept mixed up. 443 00:19:41,702 --> 00:19:43,622 Instead of stamping your hand, 444 00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:45,790 I think they should stamp men's foreheads so single ladies would know 445 00:19:45,836 --> 00:19:47,446 what the hell was going on. 446 00:19:47,490 --> 00:19:49,360 I'm serious. They could stamp married. 447 00:19:51,407 --> 00:19:52,627 Cheap. 448 00:19:52,669 --> 00:19:53,669 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 449 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:00,718 Gay like a motherfucker. 450 00:20:04,855 --> 00:20:07,115 Montanna Taylor. You guys have been great. Thank you. 451 00:20:15,997 --> 00:20:17,217 Montanna Taylor, y'all. 452 00:20:19,435 --> 00:20:20,775 [CHUCKLES] 453 00:20:20,828 --> 00:20:22,658 Only on Def Jam. 454 00:20:22,699 --> 00:20:24,479 So, here we go. 455 00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:27,527 We gonna crank this motherfucker up another notch. 456 00:20:27,574 --> 00:20:29,794 Y'all ready? Y'all ready? This guy coming to the stage, 457 00:20:29,837 --> 00:20:33,187 he was, like, on the tour, on the Def Jamtour that we did on the road. 458 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:35,322 Fuckin' the houses up. I'm tellin' y'all. 459 00:20:35,364 --> 00:20:37,634 Please give it up. Back for, like, the third time, 460 00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:40,721 from Detroit, "Downtown" Tony Brown. 461 00:20:41,544 --> 00:20:42,894 [CHEERING] 462 00:20:49,465 --> 00:20:50,505 Shoot. 463 00:20:51,206 --> 00:20:52,896 How y'all doin'? 464 00:20:52,947 --> 00:20:55,037 All right. Good lookin' audience. 465 00:20:55,079 --> 00:20:57,779 And I gotta tell you, I'm glad to be here in New York, 466 00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:00,081 but it's colder than a motherfucker though. 467 00:21:00,128 --> 00:21:01,828 God damn it. I'm so tired of cold weather, 468 00:21:01,869 --> 00:21:03,649 I don't know what to do. 469 00:21:03,697 --> 00:21:05,307 See, white folks love cold weather. 470 00:21:05,351 --> 00:21:08,881 That's why there's such shit as skiing and ice skatin'. 471 00:21:08,919 --> 00:21:10,309 Had it been up to a black man, 472 00:21:10,356 --> 00:21:13,006 wouldn't be no such thing as skiing. 473 00:21:13,054 --> 00:21:17,234 Could you imagine him trying to convince some old brothers to try that shit out? 474 00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:19,366 "Hey, man, you know what you can do? 475 00:21:19,408 --> 00:21:23,238 "You... You could put some woods on your feet 476 00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:26,552 "and then you can slide on down that hill." 477 00:21:26,589 --> 00:21:28,719 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 478 00:21:28,765 --> 00:21:32,115 They'd have been like, "Motherfucker, it's colder than a motherfucker. 479 00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:33,860 "Get that shit off your feet and let's go." 480 00:21:35,946 --> 00:21:38,946 Never would have happened. Never would have fuckin' happened. 481 00:21:38,993 --> 00:21:41,043 Boy, I tell ya, life's a bitch. 482 00:21:41,082 --> 00:21:43,132 And I'm lookin' at the news. 483 00:21:43,171 --> 00:21:45,301 That lady, they say she was crazy so they gonna put her in the crazy house. 484 00:21:45,347 --> 00:21:47,997 You know the one. Lorena Bobbitt. 485 00:21:48,045 --> 00:21:49,995 See, I hope this shit don't catch on. See? 486 00:21:50,047 --> 00:21:52,267 'Cause I know there's some ladies in here now 487 00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:54,011 with a motherfuckin' knife on them. 488 00:21:54,051 --> 00:21:57,051 See? And we don't need this pressure. 489 00:21:57,098 --> 00:21:58,358 God damn it. Ain't that a bitch, man? 490 00:21:58,404 --> 00:22:00,584 Wake up in the mornin', go to the bathroom, 491 00:22:00,623 --> 00:22:02,763 he ain't got a damn thing. 492 00:22:02,799 --> 00:22:04,149 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 493 00:22:04,192 --> 00:22:06,332 He peein' all on the ceiling and shit. 494 00:22:06,368 --> 00:22:08,498 [WHIZZING] 495 00:22:08,544 --> 00:22:11,374 He lookin' under the bed. "Oh, Lord. Where my thing at? 496 00:22:11,417 --> 00:22:14,287 "Where... Where my thing at? Oh, Jesus." 497 00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:16,163 This heifer out in the street speedin'... 498 00:22:16,204 --> 00:22:18,214 [IMITATES ENGINE REVVING] 499 00:22:18,249 --> 00:22:19,379 ...and throwin' it out the window. 500 00:22:19,425 --> 00:22:20,375 Whoa! 501 00:22:21,470 --> 00:22:24,040 Didn't give a damn where it hit. 502 00:22:24,081 --> 00:22:27,261 Motherfucker roll right in the gravels and shit. 503 00:22:27,302 --> 00:22:30,482 But can you imagine the police when they got that call? 504 00:22:30,523 --> 00:22:32,443 You know, they ridin', you know, 505 00:22:32,481 --> 00:22:35,441 nerves fucked up worryin' about a shootout, shit like that. 506 00:22:35,484 --> 00:22:37,664 All of a sudden, they come over the radio, 507 00:22:37,704 --> 00:22:41,104 "Car one eleven, we want you to proceed down on the freeway. 508 00:22:42,230 --> 00:22:43,670 "See if you can locate a dick." 509 00:22:43,710 --> 00:22:45,970 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 510 00:22:46,016 --> 00:22:48,756 "Motherfucker say what? What he say? 511 00:22:48,802 --> 00:22:51,022 "Check that, man. Ask him what he said." 512 00:22:51,065 --> 00:22:54,845 "Uh, this is car one eleven. Sir, can you repeat that?" 513 00:22:54,895 --> 00:22:57,765 "I said, uh, to proceed down on the freeway 514 00:22:57,811 --> 00:22:59,681 "and see if you can locate a dick." 515 00:23:01,597 --> 00:23:03,117 "Oh, a dick. Okay. 516 00:23:03,164 --> 00:23:05,824 "Uh, sir, is that a big dick or a little dick? 517 00:23:05,862 --> 00:23:07,212 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 518 00:23:08,474 --> 00:23:10,654 "All right. All right. Over and out." 519 00:23:10,693 --> 00:23:13,483 Then they get down there, man, they madder than a motherfucker. 520 00:23:13,522 --> 00:23:16,832 "Ain't this a bitch?" They kickin' leaves and shit. 521 00:23:16,873 --> 00:23:19,183 "Fuck a goddamn dick. How the fuck we gonna... 522 00:23:19,223 --> 00:23:20,793 "What the fuck is happenin' to us? 523 00:23:20,834 --> 00:23:22,754 "Oh, shit! There it is. There it is. 524 00:23:22,792 --> 00:23:24,532 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 525 00:23:24,577 --> 00:23:25,707 "Go on, pick it up, Fred." 526 00:23:27,536 --> 00:23:29,406 "You in charge, ain't you? 527 00:23:29,451 --> 00:23:31,191 "Well, pick it up, God damn it." 528 00:23:31,235 --> 00:23:32,845 "All right. Fuck it then. I'll pick it up. Shit. 529 00:23:32,889 --> 00:23:35,369 "Give me that potato chip bag. Fuck it. 530 00:23:35,414 --> 00:23:36,634 "Give me that, God damn it. 531 00:23:36,676 --> 00:23:38,366 "I'll get that motherfucker, shit. 532 00:23:38,417 --> 00:23:39,677 "Son of a bitch. You know I ain't fuck... 533 00:23:39,722 --> 00:23:41,292 "Ah!" 534 00:23:41,332 --> 00:23:43,602 "Don't play! I'll shoot you, motherfucker. 535 00:23:43,639 --> 00:23:45,119 "Don't put that motherfucker on me." 536 00:23:46,337 --> 00:23:47,987 That shit wild. 537 00:23:49,515 --> 00:23:51,425 Ain't that a bitch? 538 00:23:51,473 --> 00:23:54,693 You know, I think it's only right now, you know, just to even shit up, 539 00:23:54,737 --> 00:23:56,867 that some fella somewhere, you know, 540 00:23:56,913 --> 00:24:00,223 go on and cut off one of them titties or something. 541 00:24:00,264 --> 00:24:02,624 You know, that's just to make shit even, you know. 542 00:24:02,658 --> 00:24:06,528 Show 'em out in the streets, wingin' it. Whoo, whoo, whoo. Whoo, whoo, whoo. 543 00:24:06,575 --> 00:24:09,265 Soon as some people get close, throw it in a tree. Whoo! 544 00:24:10,187 --> 00:24:12,407 Go get it, God damn it! 545 00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:16,461 Ain't that a bitch? And speakin' of titties, 546 00:24:16,498 --> 00:24:19,018 you know, there's a lot of phony titties out here. 547 00:24:19,066 --> 00:24:22,456 As we speak, there's some phony titties in the room. 548 00:24:24,288 --> 00:24:25,858 You think I'm bullshittin'? 549 00:24:25,899 --> 00:24:30,079 Dow Chemical was makin' titties by the truckloads. 550 00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:32,380 You heard what I said, by the truckloads! 551 00:24:32,427 --> 00:24:33,817 Titties every-motherfuckin'-where. 552 00:24:33,863 --> 00:24:36,003 Whole factory full of titties. 553 00:24:36,039 --> 00:24:39,219 But see, they hadn't tested the titties properly, 554 00:24:39,260 --> 00:24:41,870 so therefore a lot of titties was explodin'. 555 00:24:41,915 --> 00:24:43,435 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 556 00:24:43,482 --> 00:24:46,352 You heard what I said. Leakin', shit like that. 557 00:24:46,397 --> 00:24:48,047 Oh, ain't that a bitch? 558 00:24:48,095 --> 00:24:50,305 You never know what you got till you bite down on it. 559 00:24:50,358 --> 00:24:51,398 Oh! 560 00:24:51,446 --> 00:24:52,576 [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 561 00:24:54,275 --> 00:24:56,665 Yep. You know what I'm sayin'. Ain't that a bitch? 562 00:24:56,712 --> 00:24:58,452 You fuckin' around there and get too rough with your woman 563 00:24:58,497 --> 00:24:59,587 and tear both of them off. 564 00:24:59,628 --> 00:25:02,938 Just... Whoo-whoo. 565 00:25:02,979 --> 00:25:04,499 "I didn't mean to do that, baby." 566 00:25:04,546 --> 00:25:07,106 She cryin', "Motherfucker... Oh! 567 00:25:07,157 --> 00:25:09,507 "Give me my goddamn titties." 568 00:25:09,551 --> 00:25:12,211 Oh, y'all been great, folks. Thank you very much. 569 00:25:12,249 --> 00:25:13,689 [INDISTINCT TALKING] 570 00:25:15,165 --> 00:25:16,515 [CHEERING] 571 00:25:22,651 --> 00:25:23,911 Tony "Titty" Brown. 572 00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:28,960 Cut a titty off. 573 00:25:29,005 --> 00:25:32,435 So, thank y'all for comin' out and kickin' it with us again. 574 00:25:32,487 --> 00:25:34,357 Me, the Kid and everybody. 575 00:25:34,402 --> 00:25:38,012 The man who pay the bills, head nigga in charge, 576 00:25:38,058 --> 00:25:40,018 Russell Simmons. You gotta say something different, man. 577 00:25:40,060 --> 00:25:41,630 Come on, please? 578 00:25:41,670 --> 00:25:43,370 Something different. 579 00:25:43,411 --> 00:25:45,111 Thank y'all for comin' out. God bless you. Good night. 580 00:25:47,633 --> 00:25:49,463 [AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING] 581 00:25:49,513 --> 00:25:54,063 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 45160

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.