All language subtitles for Warning.2021.BRRip.XviD.AC3-EVO

Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull

Ground control to David.

Please provide a status update
on the meters.

Um, I don't know
what the fuck I'm looking at?

You know, I'm just
a maintenance technician, right?

For the entire galaxy.

You are categorized
as low-level maintenance crew.

And when am I gonna get a...
an android up here?

Are you feeling lonely?

I'm alone.
I'm not lonely.

Anyway, robots are
awful company.

I just... I don't like
these spacewalks.

An android companion
is not an approved expense.

Um, can you really
put a value on human life?

You were registered
at a cost of $500,000.

The android costs
$40 million.

Please get us
those readings STAT.

Humans on Earth
are not handling

the recent surge
in thunderstorms well.

Yeah, I got your readings
right here all right.

- Warning!
- Mayday. Mayday, mayday!

Warning! Warning!
Warning! Warning!

Ground control,
what the hell just happened?

- Warning!
- Hey!

Warning!

Ground control, can you hear me?
Hello!

Hello!

Christ!

A lot of them are
strays, or turned in by owners

who can't take care
of them anymore.

I need one that has some
wine knowledge and won't spill.

My mom's
a bit particular.

What about these two?

This one is Charlie.

He's a fully operational
companion robot.

He served as an excellent end
of life caretaker for elders.

- He's great.
- Hm.

- Is his outfit changeable?
- Yeah, sure, yeah.

Do you want to get to know
Charlie in the meeting zone?

Hm, okay, yeah.

I'm super easygoing.

Comfortable
with any conversation topic.

You can't shock me, hm?

I can say "one more beer"
in over 48 languages.

Take me on holiday.

You're in
for a real treat.

Can he clean pools?

Actually, Charlie is a
little sensitive with water.

Oh, come on, Brian, I bet
you're no mermaid either.

I am great at doing
the dead-man float.

Am I right?

Uh, no. Can I please
meet the other one?

Let's take this outside.

So, so, you like wine?

Uh, my mom does.

Okay, listen to this.

What did the grape say when
it was being stepped on?

- Uh, I don't know?
- Nothing.

He just let out
a little wine.

Huh? Am I right?

Am I right?

- What did she say about me, huh?
- It's a hard pass, Charlie.

It was the dead-man float
shtick, huh?

A little too dark, wasn't I?

I don't think
she's your type of crowd.

You weren't made
for young ones like that.

I'm like a fine wine...

- complex but very, very fruity.
- Yeah.

That should be
plenty enough walking.

Okay,
it's bedtime, Charlie.

I need to go
get some rest.

Okay.

Close your eyes, Charlie.

He can cook.
He makes amazing desserts.

He's great
at small household tasks.

No, no, he can't fix
electrical equipment.

He's an older model,
he will fry.

But he's amazing.

No, I understand.

We'll call you
if we get one of those.

Yeah.

I see here you said
to not call, my bad.

Have a nice even...

Asshole.

Eva, engage thrusters.

- Thrusters damaged.
- Eva, engage thrusters.

- Thrusters damaged.
- Eva?

Ground control,
talk to me.

Connection stream
interrupted.

Connection stream interrupted.

Repeat that, please.

- Repeat.
- Lost connection with com center.

What do I do?
What's the protocol?

Lost-lost-lost...
Lost connection...

Lost connection
with com center.

- Sorry, repeat. Repeat...
- Lost connection with com center.

- Lost connection with com center.
- Fuck.

Good morning, Claire.

Can I please have my daily
inspirational quote?

Of course, Claire.
Today's inspiration is...

"The best preparation
for tomorrow

is doing your best today."

I like that.

Thank you, God.

Claire,
I'm changing the music.

This is not conducive
to spiritual growth.

Okay, thank you.

You're welcome.

Hi, my name is Chad.
I'm 24 years old,

I love sports...

Hi, I'm Lauren,

and my best qualities
are not on the outside.

Sinners.

I keep having bad thoughts.

And what are they, Clair?

I feel envious of Sarah,
and so I keep fantasizing

about her husband
cheating on her

and then she has to come home
and she goes crazy.

Envy is the art of counting another's
blessings instead of your own.

What are
my blessings, God?

Um, my love for you,
and your wallpaper.

Claire, I heard that.

Uh, heard what?

You hit a car.

No, I didn't.

Lying. One sin recorded.

How many sins
have I committed this month?

You are at nine
venial sins this month.

At ten sins, you will be
charged $25.99 per venial sin.

Can I just remove
the last sin?

To remove the most recent sin,
here are your options:

One, take responsibility.

End of options.

Okay.

Thanks, God.

You're welcome, Claire.

New update available.

New features...
future foresight,

communication with up to seven deceased
relatives and wireless compatibility.

To update overnight,
say "yes" at the tone.

Yes.

So, Brian, you gonna
buy me dinner first,

or we just gonna get right to it?

Charlie, tell me, what do you
know about sex? Huh?

It's the motion of the ocean
that matters the most.

Am I right?

Yeah, you're right.

Are we doing
a full body scan again?

- We did one last week.
- Yeah, just one more.

Is it because of my highbrow
sense of humor

that's upsetting people?

Everyone's getting checked
again before the holidays.

Right. The holidays.

You spending them
with someone special?

No, not really.

You know, you should
just spend them here.

I'm great company.

Yeah, you're right.
That does sound nice, actually.

Would it be too much trouble
to dress up as Santa Claus?

Whatever you want,
Charlie.

- Let me help you.
- Oh, come on, Brian.

I never had Santa
as a child.

- You never were a child.
- Oh, good point.

Am I doing something wrong,
Brian?

You're doing
everything wrong.

Don't hold back.

I'm serious, though.

I've been in this place
for two months to the day.

I've never met anybody that was
here past the two-month mark.

You know, it would be nice

if somebody young
took me home that got me.

You know, like you.

You can do
much better than me.

Better?

I don't wanna seem
needy, Brian.

But we get along great.
You're my friend.

Trust me,
you can do better.

You're my friend,
though, right?

Of course, Charlie,
I'm your friend.

Good.

Okay, lie down.

We have this new machine.

So lie down.

And you need
to close your eyes.

Okay.

Can you play some music?

Sure.

Can you turn it up a bit?
I love that song.

Sure, buddy.

God?

God?

God!

Wake up.

Fuck, fuck, fuck,
fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

God?

God 2.0 customer service.

Please hold for the next
available operator.

Oh!

God 2.0 customer service.

This phone call
may be recorded.

Please state your name
and product serial number.

Hi, my name is Claire Larry,

and how do I find
the serial number?

Can you request it from God?

I can't.
He's not there.

Oh, did you
recently do the update?

- Yeah.
- Ooh, well, that's not good.

- Why, what does that mean?
- Well, we've been having

some technical issues
with that since the storm.

I'm afraid I can't help you
over the phone, Clark.

Um, my name's Claire.
And my last name is Larry.

Oh, okay, Larry.
I think the easiest way

is to make an appointment
with the Holy Genius Bar.

What took you so long
to ask me out?

Mm, I don't know.

Just thought you
wouldn't be into it.

I never said I was.

Hey, baby.

Say hi to the camera.

Hi.

What?
What should I do?

Um, whatever
your heart desires.

- Um, smoke rings.
- Oh, you can do smoke rings?

- Mm-hmm.
- Prove it.

Sick smoke rings, Anna.

They say perfect circles
don't exist,

- but you just proved them wrong, baby.
- Fuck.

By the way, totally worth
you looking a little gross.

I look gross.
Do I look gross?

- You're so beautiful.
- You're the worst.

Okay, stop.

Fuck.

You're still here.

Stop staring at me.

What the hell?

Come on.

- Hello?
- Hey, you on your way?

Yeah, I'm on my way,
you creep.

Suffocating me already.
Jesus.

- You know that's why you love me.
- Wait, wait, do you have wine?

Yes, I got a bottle
of red right here.

- Okay, I'll see you in five.
- Okay, bye.

God...

if you can hear me...
right now...

I'd, uh...

I really, uh...

I don't know.
Shit.

Okay, all right,
I'm sorry, sorry, sorry.

Let me start again.

God?!

I-I never asked you
for anything.

Uh...

I've never even
spoken to you.

Huh. I always figured

the universe would,
you know,

lead me to wherever
I needed to be.

But, uh, I don't think
this is the right way.

Recalculating route.

Insert new destination.

Not now, Eva.
Jesus!

All right, well,
what's going on?

I mean, what am I...

What are we doing here, huh?

What-what's the lesson here?

What, that I'm selfish?
I already knew that.

I mean, like, what,
do I look like father material?

I mean, there's people
down there fucking.

They're fucking and they're murdering
each other, and you're coming after me?

You better get your
priorities straight, buster.

I mean, if you think
I deserve this...

well, maybe you should
have made me better.

I mean, this might
actually be your fault.

I mean, as far
as fathers go,

you're not very good either!

Either.

Shit.

I look gross?

Do I look gross?

Is it bad?

You look beautiful.

- Sorry, it comes out every once in a while.
- That was not a goat.

That wasn't a goat?
What was it then?

That was a sheep.

Oh, you really know
your farm animals.

Um, okay, what does a goat sound like?

Do it for me.

Ba-ha-ha.

That's a donkey,
that is not a goat at all.

- By the way, I just want to say...
- What?

I'm sorry
for getting you a burger.

- Why are you sorry for...
- Well, I should have gotten you hay.

Hey.

Hey, what's going on?

Come here.

This thing...
he follows me.

- Hey, it's okay.
- I see it all the time.

It's gonna be okay.

I have an appointment.

Yeah, I know.

- So?
- Mm...

Okay, so here's
the problem.

Never update without
doing a manual restart.

Oh, no, that's not true.
He just said,

"Say yes at the tone,"
and then he died.

Did you hold down the button
till God shut down and restarted?

- No.
- Okay then.

Oh, I see you pay for the cloud monthly

so at least you have a backup
of your good deeds and sins.

Can you see my sins?

You want me to?

Okay, so moving on.

You back up every day, right?

Yeah, no, no,
I don't, sometimes, maybe.

Okay, what's going to happen is we can
offer you a discount on a new system.

How long have you been
with your current God?

- Four years.
- Wow.

Okay, you're supposed to renew
your faith every 18 months.

- No, you're not.
- Yeah.

I'm surprised he stayed
with you this long.

Just give me
a new model then.

He'll be shipped to you
by tomorrow.

How am I gonna pray?

You'll have to do it
manually.

God...

are you there?

Hello?

God?

This is so stupid.

Where are your parents?

God... Oh, shit.

God 2.0 customer service.

This phone call
may be recorded.

So, I've been
trying to pray manually

and, uh, nobody's answering.

So, I feel... kind of stupid,

and I was just wondering
if maybe...

you could talk back to me
while I do it?

Ma'am, we do not provide
spiritual responses

to God 2.0 customers
over the phone.

I can sign you up for an
automated hotline service

for just a $199 per mont.

No, no, uh,
of course you don't.

That's... Just...
I actually was asking

just if you could
maybe do just quick response,

like, um,
just an inspirational quote,

you know, "Best preparation
for tomorrow is..."

Or something about today
or just getting through.

Uh, no.

I'm sorry, ma'am.

Is there anything else
I can help you with?

Hello?

Hello, ma'am?

Buenos días, Larry.

- Oh, God.
- ¿Inglés?

- Sí, sí, inglés.
- Good morning, Larry!

Congratulations for choosing God 2.0!
New and improved!

Wireless, waterproof,
non-flammable and simply indestructible.

Made exclusively
from recycled bots,

God 2.0 is saving you
and the planet.

Larry, come on down
to Mattress Deluxe

where we have thousands of
mattresses at wholesale prices!

Jesus fucking Christ.

You used the Lord's name in vain.
One sin recorded.

You having trouble
gaining muscle mass?

- No.
- Of course you do!

Trainers are going out of
business because of protein water.

Make it stop.
Uh, stop ads, please.

To stop advertisements,
sign up for Premium God 2.0.

To roll your eyes at God is a sign of contempt.

One sin recorded.

- Can you see me?
- Yes, I see everything.

The new God 2.0 is equipped
with visual sensor technology.

- Shit.
- Swearing. One sin recorded.

Turn off.

The new God 2.0
has an eternal battery life,

and cannot be powered down.

Forever in your presence.

Making you
a better person, always.

No, no, no, no, no!

You know, I haven't been
back to this area since I was a kid.

There was a slight incident.

There was some fireworks
and a friend's robot.

What happened?

I might have blown it up.

And I was never invited back,
you know,

so I'm feeling
the pressure.

Okay, probably best not to
mention that at dinner tonight.

No, you don't think
they'd like that?

- Probably not.
- Probably not.

I thought it'd make me a bit
dangerous, but whatever.

I get it. I get it.

But I'm serious,
I'm really nervous.

You know, I've never been
with someone of your kind.

What, someone so privileged,
and so self-loathing?

- Yeah, all my favorite parts about you.
- Hmm.

I was actually
having some doubts

- about you and I.
- Hey! That's mean.

I think it's a little odd

that you would use my childhood
sippy cup as an ashtray.

You... The childhood
sippy cup is odd.

- Who gave you the sippy cup?
- My mom.

It's exactly for that reason

I find the sippy cup
a little bit weird.

- It's sentimental.
- Do you not think that that's a reminder

of what it was like to attach
to the last...

I'm going to say it,
nipple-like thing in your life?

No, seriously.
Seriously.

Is she... is she going
to hate me?

Yeah.

- Really?
- Hm.

- Is she really mean?
- Yeah.

Well, I'm really great.

So I'm going
to make this amazing.

She's going to love me.
Watch this.

So strange.
What a strange... house

Oh, is that...
is that...

Do you have a dog?
Is that...?

- No.
- Do you think that's something on my shoe?

- Look... Do you think that's dog poo?
- No, you look fine.

I cannot go into your house
smelling like dog shit.

- Yeah.
- That's just a no-go.

This is so embarrassing.
Are you sure?

- Yeah, you're fine.
- Oh, I smell like poo.

Ooh! The door opened.

- Where's your mom?
- Hello, darling!

Come on in.

Your father and sister
are in the game room.

Oh, God.

- If you wanna watch the master.
- That's what I rolled.

See how it goes.

Take a nap,
he takes forever.

Yeah, thank you.

Watch, guys. Watch, guys.

- Yeah!
- No!

Oh, I'm so pumped.

- Wow.
- So gonna pl... I'm killing on this.

Looks like you built
a water park instead, Dad.

Don't tell your mother.

Ron, I think
that's enough now.

We should never have
installed a home optics system.

Word of advice.
Keep the home optic stuff to the bedroom,

- you don't need it for the whole house.
- Eww, Dad. Stop.

No, most accidents
happen in the bedroom.

So, you finally admit
that Olivia is an accident?

You're an accident, Liam.

Except you happened
in the living room.

- Wait, where?
- Ay, ay, ay.

Right, your go.

No cheating
like your sister.

- Yes!
- Watch and weep.

Well, apparently mission
control lost contact with him.

You'd think they'd
just get robots to do it by now.

Why would anybody
go up there?

Sometimes you
just need some space.

Oh, I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.

Nina, let him do it.
That's what he's programmed for.

We just adopted him
a couple of days ago.

We only rescue.
It's the best thing to do.

Why don't they rescue
the space guy?

The news said that rescue
mission is impossible.

I wonder
what he's thinking about.

Floating up there,
all by himself.

Probably... nothing.

I think that that's
the best part,

you can just shut off
the old computer.

So you wouldn't be
thinking about me then, Ron?

Well, of course, hon.

By "nothing", I meant
nothing else but you.

- Good save.
- Thanks.

No, I'm not buying it, Liam.

I can't even
float alone through space

without her telling me
what to do.

You know,
I think there's, uh,

something poetic about floating
through space like that.

Why?

Well, 'cause you know
how it's gonna end.

What's poetic about dying?

Everything.

It's so primitive to think

that the only way
a life has meaning

is if you know
it's going to end.

Um, not really, Mom.

I mean, not everyone is blessed
with the luxury of eternal life.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Should we be ashamed
of how blessed we are?

No, I just don't think

that we should rub it in
our guest's face.

Oh.

I apologize, Nina.

I didn't mean to make you
feel uncomfortable.

Oh...
Don't worry, I'm...

I'm not uncomfortable
at all.

I actually like being mortal.

See, not everyone
is dying not to die.

Sure. But I would assume
that given the choice,

anyone with a sane mind
would choose to go on living.

Well, I didn't have a choice.

I wasn't born in the
same tier group you were,

so I didn't get to choose.

But I'm okay with that.

But don't you feel like you're
missing out on so much time?

Well, I mean, time
just becomes more precious.

There we go
with the primitive thinking.

What's your issue?

We, as a family,

of course we're
really excited about Nina.

She's really lovely.

- But, we do have some...
- Concerns.

- Concerns, yes.
- We have some concerns.

All right, I mean,
I'd love to hear them.

None? Nothing?

Mom and Dad think you dating
a mortal is a waste of time.

I never said it
in those words.

Look, Nina, I-I think
you're very lovely.

But we have to be
realistic here.

Well, I mean,

please, do tell us your
ultra-modern take on this, uh...

It's a big sacrifice

to waste time on something
that's going to end.

And especially when that end
is so heartbreaking.

No offense, Nina.

Oh, none taken.

She's going to get sick,
and then she will die.

Do you really need to be
around there for that, Liam?

Yeah.

I love this woman,

so I want to spend
all the time I can with her.

Don't you see
what you're doing, Nina?

- Hold on.
- I'm not doing anything.

You're dragging him
down with you.

Why can't you find someone
of your own kind?

You know, uh...

I wasn't planning
on telling you guys today.

But...

I've decided to die naturally
with Nina.

Excuse me?

I'm turning it off.

I don't think so.

- What?
- I don't wanna live forever without you.

That's crazy talk.

Why, just spend time
with her then.

- Don't kill yourself over it.
- I'm not killing myself.

Look, have your fun now,

and then, when she dies,
do a memory reset.

Delete her.

That is so cold.

I'm a romantic too.

You've got so much more time and
accomplishments ahead of you.

So I can what? Hmm?
Make more money?

Then what?
Get another hobby?

Learn another language
I'm never gonna use?

When you can do
anything you want tomorrow,

today doesn't really matter.

I made my decision.

You know
you can't reverse this.

- Once you switch it off...
- Mm.

...you'll be just like them,
like her.

You'll age,
you'll get sick and then...

Liam, you know, I'd never
ask you to do this for me.

It's my choice.

I'm not gonna
let this happen.

Absolutely no way.

Well, you know, I think it's
about time I went for a cigarette.

Oh, great!
She smokes as well!

As if her life
wasn't short enough.

Okay, okay.

Hello?

Anna, it's Ben.

You're closer
than 50 yards.

- Leave or I'm calling the cops again.
- I just... I just wanna talk.

Okay, I was trying to figure out
why you left that night and...

- I left because...
- I know, okay?

- You're that thing...
- I realized I fucked up.

I've been telling you to stop
coming here for months now.

Please, Anna.

I'm coming down.

Ben, something is
really wrong with you.

I know, I-I miss you.

You stalked me using that
creepy virtual program.

You did this.

It was you,
in that fucking thing the whole time.

No, Anna, no,
I-I didn't know.

Okay, this is so fucked.
It's ruining my life too, you know.

I wish I could
block you on it.

No...

No.

No, you don't mean that.

Ben, stop living
in my past.

I don't wanna
see you again.

- Anna, it's our past.
- Ben, I'm telling you...

- Anna, please.
- Ben!

Oh, fuck.

Eva,
how much air do I got left?

You have six days,
11 hours and 34 minutes left.

I'm losing my fucking mind.

Eva, can I talk to you?

David, I am detecting
a change in body temperature.

Ah... okay.

I should probably tell you
right now, um, I got a kid.

My ex, she barely lets me
see her anyway, so...

Can I be honest with you?

I-I didn't even want her.

I thought it would...
ruin everything, or...

Not like I had
anything, but...

that's the point,
you know?

I like being alone.

Or at least I-I used to.

You know how this kid
looks at me?

Like I am everything.

The thing I wanted the least
wants me the most.

I don't deserve that.

Nah, she's better off
without me.

You know what?
I deserve this.

Hey, God, you're right.

This makes perfect sense now.

David, please repeat
your request.

Memory storage almost full.
Deleting old files.

Life support system unaffected.

A spokesperson
for NASA says that the satellite

likely suffered damage
to its guidance control system

during a standard inspection
and repairs operation.

...performing routine
maintenance on the satellite

was set to return to Earth
immediately.

Where are my cigarettes?

I don't know, Mom.

Where are you going, huh?

I told you.

I'm spending the weekend
at Deb's house.

Why do you always
leave me alone?

No, I don't.

Your father left me.
Now, you're leaving me.

Everyone leaves me.

It's only
for the weekend, Mom.

Fine, go.

You don't give a shit
about your mama.

No, that's not true.

Leave me
like a lonely dog.

I don't want you here.

Go.

- Hey!
- What's up?

Nothing,
it's my mom again.

Welcome.
Unlocked.

Hm.

Hello.

Uh, hi,
I was wondering, uh...

Yes, yes, hi.

Um, I saw, uh, the shampoo and
the conditioner in the bathroom,

and, uh, I was
just wondering maybe...

there was any body lotion
available?

Just text my mom back
if she texts me, okay?

- And what if she calls?
- Don't pick up.

How much are you
making on this?

Enough to pay for my own
place for six months.

- Are you fucking serious?
- Yeah.

What do you think
he's gonna do?

I don't think he's gonna have
a quiet night at home.

He told me to shave my pussy
and bring party dresses.

What if he does something
messed up with you?

I don't think
he's a psycho.

Oh, fuck.

Fuck. Oh, fuck.

Oh... Oh, for fuck's sake.

No.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

You people are gonna live
forever.

Smoking is not gonna kill you.
Jesus!

Liam?

Liam?!

What the...?

Liam?

Liam?

Liam?

Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.

Liam? Liam?

What?
Liam?

Dora! Dora! Dora, stop!

Liam! Liam, no! No!

Stop!
Dora, stop!

Liam.

Can I help you?

Liam, Liam.

I've been looking for you.

I've been looking for you.

Hi, I'm Liam.

Liam,
show this young lady out, please.

Can I help you?

Good bye, Nina.

- Magda?
- Yes.

Come in.

I've prepared him now,
he's ready to go.

Strip down, please.

Take off your clothes.
I need to prep you.

You are basically
just going to sleep

while his mind
takes over your body.

He will be fully in control
of your motor functions.

Um...

Uh, what if he does
something very stupid

and I get hurt?

What if I die?

If you die, he dies.

That would be unlikely.

But remember,
you signed all paperwork.

So if he did something
to hurt you...

it would cost him
a lot of money.

We've never had any cases

that things go
horribly wrong.

You're just basically
taking a nap

and waking up
a little richer.

Okay.
Do it.

Hey.

Hey!

It's done.

I smell so good.

Hello. Hi!

You will wake up
in 48 hours.

Wait, are you not
taking my body somewhere?

You are your own
responsibility.

You are not authorized.

Hi.

Um, I can't seem
to get into my room.

- And what room are you in?
- Three-five-three.

All right, let me check.

It looks like there is
only one person on the room.

- Pawel...
- Pawel Novac.

It's my dad...
I guess.

You guess?

It's my dad.

Okay, look,
I'm not supposed to let anyone in

who's not on the list.

But you don't look like
you're going to kill anyone.

If you need anything,
just let me know.

Thanks.

Hmm, no.

Definitely no.

All right.

Mm.

Mm-hmm.

- Hi.
- Hello.

It's weird
weather, huh?

Yeah.

Your, uh, daddy's out late.

- What's happening?
- What do you mean?

I don't know, parties?

It's late. You know,
everything's closing up.

Can I have a cigarette?

Though I do know
of a party.

It's an after-hours type thing.
You don't need ID.

But you don't really look
like the type of person

- that might enjoy it.
- No, I wanna go.

I'll tell you what,
I get off in half an hour.

Why don't I take you?

And I've never felt...

more alive my entire life.

And I don't mean that
in a good way.

Eva, new voice memo.

Voice recording initiated.

So this next part's
not for you.

It's for my daughter.

Emma...

Emma...

I've made sure that, uh,

all the stars
are shining for you...

every night,
when you look up into the sky.

I'm the space janitor, see,

for the entire galaxy, so...

That's what I do.

Whenever you see
a star twinkling...

that would me
just changing a bulb.

I love you forever.

- Eva, stop recording.
- David, please repeat.

Eva?

David, please repeat.

Oh, God, no.

Don't leave me.
Please don't leave me.

Do you believe
in God?

No.

Me neither.

I do believe
in goat people.

Goat peeps.

Stay tuned
for late breaking news.

And now following up

on the new strain
of the coronavirus

that has been discovered
in the US Virgin Islands.

This is the third resurgence and mutation
of this virus since the COVID-19 pandemic.

The WHO has officially
registered it as COVID-28.

The public is being warned
not to panic,

as the CDC states
the strain is not expected

to rise to the levels anywhere
close to the 2020 pandemic.

Citizens have, however,

begun prepping for
another year of lockdown.

There are reports of rioting and looting,

and some governors have started
enacting serious measures

by shutting down
state borders.

This, combined with recent
outages in electricity...

You shy?

Hey. You found
my little flower girl.

Oh, you know her?

- Yeah.
- She's with me now.

What?

Lara, you're
fucking teasing me now.

Oh, don't be a dick,
Vincent.

I'm just dancing.
I'm trying to have fun, you know.

Oh, shit.

Can you get us a room?

We're sold out, but, uh,
Magda has a room.

- Uh...
- Come on.

Come on, hurry up!
You don't have to hide a dead body.

Just a minute.

- Mm.
- Mm.

Uh-oh.

- Ooh...
- Oh, wow, you're a dirty girl, huh.

- Hey! Don't! No, no!
- Hey, Lara,

yours is bigger, no?

It's my dad's.

Your dad's?

Your dad's
a little pervert, huh?

You should invite him
to the party.

Sounds like a real gentleman, you know?

And what are you hiding
in your closet, Vincent?

- Nothing.
- Oh, really?

Come on, so you have
a bag of dildos.

Come on, have some fun.
Fun, fun!

Come on.

Take some of this.

Uh-uh, uh-uh.
Don't give her K, asshole.

What? It's not K.

I wanna try it.
Fuck it.

See? That's the spirit.

Here. Here.

Here.

Oh, ho, ho, hey...

Hey, leave her.

She likes girls.

So do I.

I want... water.

Please.

Fuck!

- Bitch!
- No, no...

See what you
made me fucking do.

What the fuck?

Just get out!

You're fucking 17?

Okay.

Okay. Okay.

Okay. It's gonna be okay.

Yeah, yeah.
It's gonna be okay.

Oh, my God.

Warning! Warning!

This is a national
emergency broadcast.

This is not a test.

I repeat, this is not a test.

We urge all citizens...

This is not a test.
I repeat, this is not a test.

Hey, you gotta pay for that!

Give me one!
I need to talk to God.

Hey, it's not genuine,
I painted him last night.

Good luck with your thoughts
and prayers, man.

Are you okay?

Where are your parents?

What's your name,
sweetie?

- Emma.
- Let's go sit, okay?

So this is how it ends.

They say every end
is a new beginning,

but that ain't true.

People just say that
'cause they wanna feel better.

It's easier to live in an
illusion than it is in reality.

What is this thing
called "love" anyway?

Did I ever give enough of it?

Does anyone?

I thought everything
made sense,

but none of this does now.

I thought I was in control.

But I'm not.

How the hell am I
the last man alive?

How the hell
has that happened?

Emma.

Recording interrupted.

David, you have
run out of storage space.

Last saved recording.

Whenever you see
a star twinkling...

that would be me
just changing a bulb.

I love you forever.

I love you forever.

I love you for...

I love you, too.

David, this is God.

I know you think I didn't,
but I did hear your prayers.

I'm sorry, it's been
pretty hectic around here.

But I'm here for you now.

My child, how may I help you?

Are you fucking kidding me?

Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull