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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:47,515 --> 00:02:49,930 Mrs Marbury? 'Ya 2 00:02:54,825 --> 00:02:56,621 Mr Cust. 3 00:03:03,876 --> 00:03:07,090 Rent is two and six a week, you pay up front and a week in hand. 4 00:03:08,365 --> 00:03:11,129 Some parcels got delivered for you. We took them up. 5 00:03:11,155 --> 00:03:13,850 I trust you're not going to be expecting that service 6 00:03:13,876 --> 00:03:15,621 regularly, carrying parcels. 7 00:03:15,646 --> 00:03:17,570 What do you think I am, a pack horse? 8 00:03:17,596 --> 00:03:19,411 You should have left them for me to carry. 9 00:03:19,436 --> 00:03:21,490 And have brown paper items littering my vestibule? 10 00:03:21,515 --> 00:03:22,980 This is no post office. 11 00:03:24,515 --> 00:03:27,850 I'm very sorry to inconvenience you, Mrs Marbury. 12 00:03:27,876 --> 00:03:30,340 The front door is bolted at ten o'clock sharp. 13 00:03:30,365 --> 00:03:32,730 I don't hold with none of my gentlemen out carousing 14 00:03:32,756 --> 00:03:35,521 half the night. I don't hold with no topers and sots neither. 15 00:03:35,545 --> 00:03:39,009 Nor no bad language, profanities and blasphemies and the like. 16 00:03:39,034 --> 00:03:41,570 What I do hold with is old-fashioned manners. 17 00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:44,371 You mind your Ps and Qs and we'll get along nicely. 18 00:03:47,836 --> 00:03:49,811 The privy is in the yard. 19 00:03:49,836 --> 00:03:52,901 I prefer my gentlemen to not be cavalier in their use 20 00:03:52,925 --> 00:03:55,540 of the lavatory paper. It blocks up the pipes, 21 00:03:55,566 --> 00:03:58,450 and then who's got to get in there with a stick and break it up? 22 00:03:59,876 --> 00:04:01,340 Me, that's who. 23 00:04:06,086 --> 00:04:07,730 Are you just passing through 24 00:04:07,756 --> 00:04:11,308 or do you expect to be a long-term resident? 25 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:12,750 That all depends. 26 00:04:14,437 --> 00:04:16,481 On what? 27 00:04:16,507 --> 00:04:18,721 The success of my enterprise. 28 00:04:29,225 --> 00:04:30,922 Bed bugs? 29 00:04:30,947 --> 00:04:34,891 I run a clean house, Mr Cust. A very clean house. No foreigns. 30 00:04:34,917 --> 00:04:37,411 Not like some round here - take in all sorts, 31 00:04:37,437 --> 00:04:39,692 don't know whose air you're breathing. 32 00:04:52,997 --> 00:04:56,161 Mr Treadgold. One of my long-term residents. 33 00:04:56,187 --> 00:04:59,281 Got a bad back. My daughter Lily is helping him. 34 00:04:59,307 --> 00:05:02,161 Very skilled she is, with gentlemen what have aches. 35 00:05:07,637 --> 00:05:09,362 A shilling for ordinary. 36 00:05:09,387 --> 00:05:11,130 You book through me. You pay me. 37 00:05:13,826 --> 00:05:16,161 She knows her stuff, won't give you no argument. 38 00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:20,971 I'll let you get unpacked. 39 00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,771 I followed you the other day. 40 00:06:19,105 --> 00:06:21,201 You looked old and tired. 41 00:06:24,156 --> 00:06:26,641 You walk as if your feet hurt. 42 00:06:31,947 --> 00:06:34,442 I was rather concerned for you. 43 00:06:41,387 --> 00:06:43,562 I stood so close behind you. 44 00:06:45,826 --> 00:06:48,281 Could you feel my breath on your neck, Hercule? 45 00:07:00,466 --> 00:07:02,612 Plenty will say that it is vanity. 46 00:07:03,947 --> 00:07:06,692 "That puffed up, pompous peacock Poirot," they'll say. 47 00:07:08,797 --> 00:07:11,442 And they'll laugh at you behind your back, 48 00:07:11,466 --> 00:07:13,692 but I'm not laughing 49 00:07:14,906 --> 00:07:16,411 because it's not vanity. 50 00:07:19,947 --> 00:07:22,521 I think you're trying to roll back the time to when you were 51 00:07:22,547 --> 00:07:25,331 a famous detective. 52 00:07:25,355 --> 00:07:29,641 When you were celebrated, when you were wanted 53 00:07:32,997 --> 00:07:34,521 when you were loved. 54 00:07:42,026 --> 00:07:44,851 I have never been loved, 55 00:07:44,877 --> 00:07:46,331 but I will be feared. 56 00:07:49,026 --> 00:07:51,442 I will be a faceless beast, 57 00:07:51,466 --> 00:07:54,572 leading lambs to the slaughter. 58 00:08:12,797 --> 00:08:16,362 I need to speak to Inspector Japp on a matter of urgency. 59 00:08:16,387 --> 00:08:18,771 I know the way. He's not here. 60 00:08:18,797 --> 00:08:20,721 Where is he? 61 00:08:20,747 --> 00:08:22,880 Hoeing his cabbages, most like. 62 00:08:22,906 --> 00:08:24,880 Just a regular civilian now. 63 00:08:24,906 --> 00:08:29,331 He retired? Mm-hm. Who took over from him? 64 00:08:29,355 --> 00:08:31,971 That'll be young Inspector Crome, sir. 65 00:08:31,997 --> 00:08:34,572 Then I'll speak to him. He's out on a case at the moment. 66 00:08:36,105 --> 00:08:39,331 Take a seat with the other members of the public, if you'd be so good. 67 00:09:06,626 --> 00:09:08,130 Inspector Crome, sir. 68 00:09:10,746 --> 00:09:12,692 Hercule Poirot. 69 00:09:38,466 --> 00:09:43,682 I will be a faceless beast leading lambs to the slaughter. 70 00:09:44,187 --> 00:09:46,522 Inspector Japp- 71 00:09:46,547 --> 00:09:49,851 "I'm going to do something for both of us, Hercule. 72 00:09:49,876 --> 00:09:53,052 "I'm getting my ducks in a row, as they say. 73 00:09:53,076 --> 00:09:54,772 "I'll let you know when I'm ready. 74 00:09:54,797 --> 00:09:59,412 "Until then, chin-chin. ABC." 75 00:09:59,437 --> 00:10:03,621 Every letter from ABC has a different postmark. 76 00:10:03,647 --> 00:10:07,522 I keep the envelopes. They're different from the others. 77 00:10:07,547 --> 00:10:10,412 What others? THE others. 78 00:10:10,437 --> 00:10:15,652 A small selection, presented solely for comparison of tone and intent. 79 00:10:20,076 --> 00:10:23,880 "You're not better than us. Piss off, Froggy." 80 00:10:23,905 --> 00:10:29,101 19 years I've lived here, and still people think I'm French. 81 00:10:29,397 --> 00:10:31,522 Are they all like this? Mm. 82 00:10:33,235 --> 00:10:36,932 You should have said you were retiring. 83 00:10:36,956 --> 00:10:39,162 I would have raised a glass to you. 84 00:10:39,187 --> 00:10:44,380 Ah, didn't want to make a big song and dance. Just did it quietly. 85 00:10:47,317 --> 00:10:52,292 Japp, why wouldn't Inspector Crome see me? 86 00:10:52,317 --> 00:10:55,802 Well, you know what young men are like. Want to make their name. 87 00:10:55,826 --> 00:10:58,880 He's a good lad, though. Just give him time. 88 00:10:58,905 --> 00:11:01,010 Why do you keep these? 89 00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:04,010 You should chuck them in the bin where they belong. 90 00:11:04,035 --> 00:11:06,052 They come every day, Japp- 91 00:11:07,677 --> 00:11:12,292 The letters from ABC are polite, sympathetic, 92 00:11:12,317 --> 00:11:14,130 almost friendly. 93 00:11:14,155 --> 00:11:16,572 They scare me the most. 94 00:11:16,596 --> 00:11:19,412 And there is something wrong about them. 95 00:11:19,437 --> 00:11:23,211 I cannot put my finger on what is wrong about them. 96 00:11:23,235 --> 00:11:26,880 Something wrong with them? Everything's wrong with them! 97 00:11:26,905 --> 00:11:30,491 "I will be a faceless beast." This bloke's off his crust! 98 00:11:33,365 --> 00:11:34,961 You're out of sorts. 99 00:11:36,397 --> 00:11:38,932 Too much on your own. 100 00:11:38,956 --> 00:11:42,772 Now, if you were busy, you'd see these for what they are - 101 00:11:42,797 --> 00:11:44,652 nasty, cruel people, 102 00:11:44,677 --> 00:11:47,292 and some mad bloke playing a vicious game with you, 103 00:11:47,317 --> 00:11:49,412 and you'd chuck the whole sorry lot of them. 104 00:11:58,235 --> 00:12:00,412 I've baked a ham. 105 00:12:00,437 --> 00:12:02,130 Got some spuds. 106 00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:04,062 Nice red cabbage. 107 00:12:04,086 --> 00:12:06,062 Come and have supper. 108 00:12:06,086 --> 00:12:08,601 Jam roly-poly with custard for pudding. 109 00:12:08,626 --> 00:12:11,932 Quelle horreur! English food. Come on. 110 00:12:11,956 --> 00:12:14,062 We'll set the world to rights. 111 00:12:14,086 --> 00:12:16,341 Even got some brandy left over from Christmas. 112 00:12:18,365 --> 00:12:21,572 I could use the company too, if I'm honest. 113 00:12:21,596 --> 00:12:24,451 If it is a favour to you, then I accept. 114 00:12:24,476 --> 00:12:25,880 Smashing. 115 00:12:25,905 --> 00:12:28,851 But first, I'm burning these. 116 00:12:28,876 --> 00:12:32,211 Every last single one of them. 117 00:12:32,235 --> 00:12:33,241 Japp 118 00:12:34,596 --> 00:12:36,091 thank you, my friend. 119 00:12:38,267 --> 00:12:40,731 Close the shed for me and we'll head straight off. 120 00:13:05,235 --> 00:13:06,652 Japp? 121 00:13:08,155 --> 00:13:11,172 Japp? Japp? 122 00:15:17,756 --> 00:15:19,572 Good morning to you, madam. 123 00:15:19,596 --> 00:15:22,221 Do I have the privilege of addressing Mrs Alice Asher? 124 00:15:22,245 --> 00:15:25,652 Yes, but don't waste your breath on the patter, sunshine. 125 00:15:25,677 --> 00:15:29,861 I'm not buying anything and I've a sandwich waiting, so on your way. 126 00:15:29,886 --> 00:15:33,010 You don't know what I'm selling yet, Mrs Asher. 127 00:16:17,447 --> 00:16:21,251 The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. 128 00:16:21,277 --> 00:16:22,731 Blessed be the Lord. 129 00:16:24,636 --> 00:16:29,062 Man that is born of woman hath but a short time to live 130 00:17:07,477 --> 00:17:11,781 Inspector Crome! Do not make me chase you through a graveyard! 131 00:17:11,807 --> 00:17:13,811 It's beneath both our dignities! 132 00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:20,090 Mr Poirot. I need you to speak to your colleagues in Andover. 133 00:17:20,115 --> 00:17:21,652 About what? 134 00:17:21,676 --> 00:17:22,891 Murder. 135 00:17:33,396 --> 00:17:35,422 This was Japp's office. 136 00:17:35,447 --> 00:17:37,090 It was. 137 00:17:38,996 --> 00:17:43,811 You still do those murder parties, in the big houses? 138 00:17:43,836 --> 00:17:46,332 Like when you were a celebrity? 139 00:17:46,356 --> 00:17:47,662 Odd thing to do - 140 00:17:47,686 --> 00:17:50,612 rich people pretending to be murdered. 141 00:17:50,636 --> 00:17:52,010 Grisly. 142 00:17:52,036 --> 00:17:53,891 There's no longer the demand. 143 00:17:55,246 --> 00:17:56,731 Mr Poirot 144 00:17:57,967 --> 00:17:59,692 you appear to be melting. 145 00:18:06,886 --> 00:18:08,612 Must have been jolly though, 146 00:18:08,636 --> 00:18:10,891 cavorting with the gentry. 147 00:18:10,915 --> 00:18:13,051 The bright young things. 148 00:18:13,076 --> 00:18:14,301 The aristos. 149 00:18:15,356 --> 00:18:17,332 Playing at death. 150 00:18:17,356 --> 00:18:19,781 Fun while it lasted. 151 00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:23,891 Inspector Crome, have I caused you some offence? 152 00:18:23,915 --> 00:18:29,112 Do you mean me personally, or me collectively, as in the force? 153 00:18:29,527 --> 00:18:31,172 Both. 154 00:18:31,196 --> 00:18:34,141 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 155 00:18:34,165 --> 00:18:37,501 You're the great detective, the solver of impenetrable clues. 156 00:18:37,527 --> 00:18:39,731 You work it out. 157 00:18:39,757 --> 00:18:41,332 Yelland. 158 00:18:41,356 --> 00:18:44,731 So I've spoken in depth to our colleagues at Andover, sir, 159 00:18:44,757 --> 00:18:46,891 and received details of all crimes committed 160 00:18:46,915 --> 00:18:49,141 on the 31st of March, 1933, to wit: 161 00:18:49,165 --> 00:18:52,612 a dog running off with some laundry, a bicycle thrown in a river, 162 00:18:52,636 --> 00:18:55,781 an altercation involving a set of dentures. Dentures? 163 00:18:55,807 --> 00:18:59,971 Yes, sir, the miscreant being one Herbert "Humpy" Morris, who 164 00:18:59,996 --> 00:19:04,332 requested that a passing lady give him a smile to which she responded 165 00:19:04,356 --> 00:19:08,382 with some choice Anglo-Saxon, whereupon Morris threw his dentures 166 00:19:08,406 --> 00:19:12,811 at her, the lady stamped on them and it all turned into quite the to-do. 167 00:19:12,836 --> 00:19:16,332 What else? The usual run of drunk and disorderlies and breaches of 168 00:19:16,356 --> 00:19:19,862 the peace, punch-ups, soliciting and a boy broke the window of 169 00:19:19,886 --> 00:19:23,382 Asher's tobacconists but Mrs Asher didn't answer the door 170 00:19:23,406 --> 00:19:26,811 so the constable concluded she was in the public house, 171 00:19:26,836 --> 00:19:29,811 as she was often wont to be, taped some cardboard over 172 00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:33,692 the window and let the young lad off with a clip round the lug-hole. 173 00:19:33,717 --> 00:19:36,090 No murders. No, sir. 174 00:19:36,115 --> 00:19:38,090 No corpse in the library. 175 00:19:38,115 --> 00:19:42,251 No silver candlestick rammed in some heiress' eye socket. 176 00:19:42,277 --> 00:19:45,172 No twitching guts in the conservatory. 177 00:19:47,197 --> 00:19:48,662 No, sir. 178 00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:51,971 Well, there we are then. 179 00:19:53,967 --> 00:19:55,741 I hope that puts your mind at rest. 180 00:19:57,717 --> 00:20:00,382 You know what day it is today, don't you? 181 00:20:00,406 --> 00:20:02,051 The first of April. 182 00:20:02,076 --> 00:20:03,582 Fools' Day. 183 00:20:04,886 --> 00:20:07,020 I think you've just been taken. 184 00:20:12,125 --> 00:20:12,172 Your time and effort in this matter are appreciated. 185 00:20:12,196 --> 00:20:15,662 Your time and effort in this matter are appreciated. 186 00:20:19,125 --> 00:20:21,662 Why's his chin all grey? 187 00:20:21,686 --> 00:20:22,862 Don't ask. 188 00:21:01,996 --> 00:21:04,221 Je vous salue, Marie, pleine de grace. 189 00:21:04,246 --> 00:21:06,461 Le Seigneur est avec vous. 190 00:21:06,487 --> 00:21:09,051 Vous etes benie entre toutes les femmes 191 00:21:09,076 --> 00:21:11,942 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 192 00:21:26,905 --> 00:21:30,090 Je vous salue, Marie, pleine de grace. 193 00:21:30,115 --> 00:21:33,451 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 194 00:21:34,786 --> 00:21:36,371 What offence? 195 00:21:41,955 --> 00:21:44,290 Je vous salue, Marie, pleine de grace. 196 00:21:44,316 --> 00:21:45,490 Le Seigneur est avec vous. 197 00:21:45,516 --> 00:21:47,520 Breaches of the peace, punch-ups, 198 00:21:47,546 --> 00:21:51,240 soliciting, and a boy broke the window of Asher's tobacconists, 199 00:21:51,266 --> 00:21:54,371 but Mrs Asher didn't answer the door so the constable concluded she was 200 00:21:54,395 --> 00:21:56,760 in the public house. 201 00:21:56,786 --> 00:21:58,451 Why is his chin all grey? 202 00:21:58,476 --> 00:22:00,681 Don't ask. 203 00:22:00,705 --> 00:22:03,780 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 204 00:22:03,806 --> 00:22:06,530 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 205 00:22:06,556 --> 00:22:08,171 The window of Asher's tobacconists. 206 00:22:08,195 --> 00:22:10,810 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 207 00:22:10,836 --> 00:22:13,371 What offence do you think you might have caused, Mr Poirot? 208 00:22:18,596 --> 00:22:19,760 Assassin! 209 00:22:21,596 --> 00:22:23,681 Assassin. 210 00:22:37,875 --> 00:22:41,371 "I hope you're as excited as I am, Hercule. 211 00:22:41,395 --> 00:22:44,760 "I hope you're ready too. 212 00:22:44,786 --> 00:22:48,090 "31st March 213 00:22:48,115 --> 00:22:51,730 "Chin-chin. ABC." 214 00:22:53,476 --> 00:22:55,141 ABC. 215 00:23:00,875 --> 00:23:03,451 The usual run of drunk and disorderlies 216 00:23:03,476 --> 00:23:05,810 and breaches of the peace, punch-ups, soliciting 217 00:23:05,836 --> 00:23:08,570 and a boy broke the window of Asher's tobacconists. 218 00:23:08,596 --> 00:23:11,651 And Mrs Asher didn't answer the door. 219 00:23:25,625 --> 00:23:27,250 New tickets, please. 220 00:23:27,276 --> 00:23:29,121 New tickets. 221 00:23:29,145 --> 00:23:30,891 Thank you, sir. 222 00:23:33,195 --> 00:23:34,651 Sir. Merci. 223 00:23:47,786 --> 00:23:49,611 New tickets, please. 224 00:23:49,635 --> 00:23:50,760 Thank you, madam. 225 00:24:49,955 --> 00:24:51,290 Mrs Asher? 226 00:24:56,355 --> 00:24:58,330 Madame? 227 00:26:03,715 --> 00:26:06,121 I will find this person, madame. 228 00:26:07,395 --> 00:26:09,250 I will find them. 229 00:26:12,715 --> 00:26:14,480 I give you my solemn word. 230 00:27:23,277 --> 00:27:26,332 ♪ Like the tick, tick, tock of the stately clock 231 00:27:26,356 --> 00:27:29,662 ♪ As it stands against the wall 232 00:27:29,686 --> 00:27:33,531 ♪ Like the drip, drip, drip of the raindrops 233 00:27:33,557 --> 00:27:37,770 ♪ When the summer shower is through 234 00:27:37,796 --> 00:27:41,731 ♪ So a voice within me keeps repeating 235 00:27:41,757 --> 00:27:45,132 ♪ You, you, you 236 00:27:45,156 --> 00:27:50,391 ♪ Night and day, you are the one 237 00:27:51,865 --> 00:27:57,090 ♪ Only you beneath the moon or under the sun 238 00:27:58,246 --> 00:28:02,172 ♪ Whether near to me or far ♪ 239 00:28:02,196 --> 00:28:05,662 Shut up, Lily! I can't hear myself bloody think! 240 00:28:26,915 --> 00:28:29,491 You murdering sack of shit bastard. 241 00:28:31,436 --> 00:28:32,582 Come on, then! 242 00:28:32,606 --> 00:28:34,612 Get in here! 243 00:28:34,636 --> 00:28:35,612 That's it. 244 00:28:40,436 --> 00:28:41,811 Get in! 245 00:28:45,197 --> 00:28:48,770 Going to the rope for this, you know that? 246 00:28:48,796 --> 00:28:50,811 Going to crack your neck. 247 00:28:50,836 --> 00:28:52,301 It wasn't me. 248 00:28:52,326 --> 00:28:54,891 Balls. It isn't him. 249 00:28:56,246 --> 00:28:58,971 Use your eyes, Detective Bunce. 250 00:28:58,996 --> 00:29:02,770 Alice Asher's neighbour said he was always threatening his wife, 251 00:29:02,796 --> 00:29:06,221 that he said he was going to cut her throat, 252 00:29:06,246 --> 00:29:08,612 then he was going to cut her head clean off 253 00:29:08,636 --> 00:29:11,851 and he practically did cut her head clean off. 254 00:29:11,875 --> 00:29:14,382 Her head? Her head was cut off? 255 00:29:14,406 --> 00:29:15,862 Like you don't know. 256 00:29:15,886 --> 00:29:19,971 To inflict such a mortal wound with a weapon inadequate to the task 257 00:29:19,996 --> 00:29:22,251 requires great strength. 258 00:29:22,277 --> 00:29:24,692 Monsieur Asher is a dipsomaniac. 259 00:29:24,717 --> 00:29:26,811 He has delirium tremens. 260 00:29:26,836 --> 00:29:29,971 He could not strike a match, let alone wield a knife. 261 00:29:29,996 --> 00:29:33,692 And where is the blood? He's not washed his hands. 262 00:29:33,717 --> 00:29:37,382 There would be blood ingrained in the beds of his fingernails, 263 00:29:37,406 --> 00:29:40,051 the skin of his knuckles, his wrists, 264 00:29:40,076 --> 00:29:44,221 the cuffs of his shirt. There would be blood everywhere. 265 00:29:44,246 --> 00:29:46,531 It isn't him. 266 00:29:46,557 --> 00:29:50,172 He bought some gloves and then he chucked them after. 267 00:29:50,197 --> 00:29:55,412 Mon dieu, Detective Bunce, you are no student of human frailty. 268 00:29:55,915 --> 00:29:59,662 Any money he has, he spends on his demon. 269 00:29:59,686 --> 00:30:01,582 On alcohol. 270 00:30:01,606 --> 00:30:03,382 He would not buy gloves. 271 00:30:03,406 --> 00:30:06,172 And the cash register was undisturbed. 272 00:30:06,196 --> 00:30:08,942 If money were the motive, he would have taken it. 273 00:30:13,196 --> 00:30:16,971 You reckon you know it all, don't you? Hm? 274 00:30:16,996 --> 00:30:19,891 Well, you don't. 275 00:30:19,915 --> 00:30:21,491 Case closed. 276 00:31:13,757 --> 00:31:16,571 If Mum knew what you were really like, Betty. 277 00:31:18,676 --> 00:31:20,840 If Donald knew. 278 00:31:20,865 --> 00:31:22,402 He'll find out. 279 00:31:22,426 --> 00:31:25,652 But not before I get bored of him. Because he is boring, Megan. 280 00:31:25,676 --> 00:31:29,481 The only thing interesting about him is his pay packet. 281 00:31:29,507 --> 00:31:31,481 He is so boring. 282 00:31:31,507 --> 00:31:33,531 It's like talking to a plate. 283 00:31:33,557 --> 00:31:35,652 How did you put up with him? 284 00:31:35,676 --> 00:31:36,811 I loved him. 285 00:31:38,757 --> 00:31:43,481 All I had to do was click my fingers and he came running. 286 00:31:43,507 --> 00:31:45,961 Threw you over like you were nothing. 287 00:31:45,986 --> 00:31:48,602 I did you a favour there, Megan. 288 00:31:48,626 --> 00:31:52,602 One day you'll see that and maybe then you'll stop being 289 00:31:52,626 --> 00:31:55,811 such a sour, joyless, vinegar tits. 290 00:31:55,836 --> 00:31:58,531 Anyway 291 00:31:58,557 --> 00:32:00,652 sweet dreams. 292 00:33:07,277 --> 00:33:12,090 "Hello, Hercule. What did you think of Mrs Asher? 293 00:33:12,115 --> 00:33:14,561 "She made a terrible mess." 294 00:33:14,586 --> 00:33:18,760 "You know what's next, don't you? 295 00:33:18,786 --> 00:33:20,652 "B" 296 00:33:20,676 --> 00:33:23,760 "But which B? And when?" 297 00:33:25,146 --> 00:33:26,251 "Chin-chin." 298 00:33:29,676 --> 00:33:31,731 “A- 299 00:33:31,757 --> 00:33:34,122 B- 300 00:33:34,146 --> 00:33:35,201 C" 301 00:33:50,356 --> 00:33:53,372 I should see the other chap, eh? 302 00:33:53,396 --> 00:33:55,201 Were you fighting over a girl? 303 00:33:55,227 --> 00:33:57,090 No. 304 00:33:57,115 --> 00:33:58,682 Oh, that's a shame. 305 00:33:58,707 --> 00:34:01,402 Girls love being fought over. 306 00:34:01,426 --> 00:34:04,010 Makes us feel all wanted and desirable. 307 00:34:05,865 --> 00:34:08,331 What you got in there? 308 00:34:08,356 --> 00:34:10,121 Family silver? 309 00:34:11,916 --> 00:34:13,612 I'm in sales. 310 00:34:13,637 --> 00:34:14,971 I travel 311 00:34:14,996 --> 00:34:16,202 with what I sell. 312 00:34:16,226 --> 00:34:19,291 It's polite to use a girl's name, you know. 313 00:34:21,706 --> 00:34:23,481 Betty. 314 00:34:23,507 --> 00:34:25,402 Now we're friends. 315 00:34:25,427 --> 00:34:27,452 What do you sell, then? 316 00:34:36,786 --> 00:34:41,840 Miss Barnard, table nine is waiting. Just coming, Mrs Welk. 317 00:34:41,996 --> 00:34:45,331 Oh, I'm definitely keeping these. 318 00:34:45,356 --> 00:34:47,090 They're lovely. 319 00:34:47,115 --> 00:34:49,041 And very reasonably priced. 320 00:34:52,197 --> 00:34:54,251 I mean, if you're too busy now to get your purse, 321 00:34:54,277 --> 00:34:56,532 I can come back when you've finished your shift? 322 00:34:56,556 --> 00:34:59,612 Oh, no, I don't pay for things. 323 00:34:59,637 --> 00:35:01,481 Men give them to me. 324 00:35:01,507 --> 00:35:05,561 I can't. This is my livelihood. 325 00:35:05,586 --> 00:35:07,891 You're a virgin, aren't you? 326 00:35:09,036 --> 00:35:10,371 What? 327 00:35:10,396 --> 00:35:14,052 You should be grateful that anything you've touched is now touching me. 328 00:35:15,836 --> 00:35:20,172 This is the closest you're ever going to get to my legs. 329 00:35:20,197 --> 00:35:23,251 Now slither off and play with yourself thinking about that. 330 00:36:14,257 --> 00:36:16,871 And that's how you play backgammon. 331 00:36:30,697 --> 00:36:32,231 Not your night. 332 00:36:35,487 --> 00:36:37,351 You're breaking my heart. 333 00:37:09,416 --> 00:37:11,791 Thank you. 334 00:37:11,817 --> 00:37:13,791 Get your sweaty hands off me. 335 00:37:13,817 --> 00:37:15,722 You owe me for the stockings. 336 00:37:20,697 --> 00:37:23,751 Debt paid. Virgin. 337 00:37:40,056 --> 00:37:43,951 Donald. You're coming home with me. Let go, you dozy bastard. 338 00:37:43,976 --> 00:37:47,472 You stay here, we're through - I won't marry you. 339 00:37:49,056 --> 00:37:51,751 Oh, my broken heart. 340 00:37:51,775 --> 00:37:55,472 I have a chap in here who's got more about him than you'll ever have. 341 00:37:55,496 --> 00:37:57,621 So off you trot and stop getting on my nerves. 342 00:38:04,536 --> 00:38:06,311 Don't run after him, Megan. 343 00:38:07,496 --> 00:38:09,391 Have some bloody dignity. 344 00:38:39,387 --> 00:38:42,672 "You know what's next, don't you? 345 00:38:42,697 --> 00:38:44,512 “B. 346 00:38:44,536 --> 00:38:47,311 "But which B?" 347 00:40:18,106 --> 00:40:20,081 Who is she? 348 00:40:20,106 --> 00:40:21,621 Elizabeth Barnard. 349 00:40:21,646 --> 00:40:23,592 Known as Betty. 350 00:40:23,617 --> 00:40:25,951 She works down at the Ginger Cat Cafe. 351 00:42:04,106 --> 00:42:05,951 My darling. 352 00:42:05,976 --> 00:42:09,242 My special darling baby! 353 00:42:09,266 --> 00:42:12,951 Who? Who would do something like this? 354 00:42:12,976 --> 00:42:14,362 Who? 355 00:42:18,016 --> 00:42:19,751 I've just been told. 356 00:42:19,775 --> 00:42:21,442 It can't be true. 357 00:42:21,467 --> 00:42:26,661 Someone took our girl from us, Donald. Our perfect angel! 358 00:42:29,416 --> 00:42:31,112 What are we going to do without her? 359 00:42:33,186 --> 00:42:35,192 I'll make some tea. 360 00:42:41,905 --> 00:42:44,880 I thought you might require some assistance. 361 00:42:47,655 --> 00:42:49,911 "Our special darling. 362 00:42:49,936 --> 00:42:51,472 "Our perfect angel." 363 00:42:51,496 --> 00:42:54,192 Betty wasn't either of those things. My sister was a slut. 364 00:42:54,217 --> 00:42:56,960 Mademoiselle, your sister is dead. 365 00:42:56,985 --> 00:42:59,112 She was still a slut. 366 00:42:59,137 --> 00:43:01,081 I can make the tea by myself. 367 00:43:17,547 --> 00:43:19,992 Do you want your walk? Mm? 368 00:43:20,016 --> 00:43:23,161 Do you? Oh, very well. 369 00:43:24,936 --> 00:43:26,521 I've finished my work. 370 00:43:26,547 --> 00:43:28,521 Would you mind if I joined you, Sir Carmichael? 371 00:43:28,547 --> 00:43:31,521 Not at all, but it is quite wild out there. 372 00:43:31,547 --> 00:43:33,552 Well, I could use the fresh air. 373 00:43:33,577 --> 00:43:35,681 And wild weather is exhilarating. 374 00:43:35,706 --> 00:43:39,472 Ha! Well, in that case, we'd love your company. 375 00:43:39,496 --> 00:43:42,322 Come on, Wilbur. Come on. 376 00:43:42,347 --> 00:43:44,032 Come on. 377 00:43:44,056 --> 00:43:45,112 Franklin? 378 00:43:49,856 --> 00:43:51,472 Go with them. 379 00:43:55,217 --> 00:43:58,192 You're the best brother-in-law a girl could have. 380 00:43:58,217 --> 00:44:01,192 Darling, I'm the only brother-in-law you have. 381 00:44:22,856 --> 00:44:28,112 ♪ I think of you, night and day 382 00:44:29,467 --> 00:44:32,112 ♪ Day and night ♪ 383 00:44:33,467 --> 00:44:36,041 You're Mr Cust. 384 00:44:36,067 --> 00:44:37,161 Yes. 385 00:44:38,626 --> 00:44:40,552 Is there something you want? 386 00:44:44,347 --> 00:44:47,041 Is your mother in? She's out. 387 00:44:47,067 --> 00:44:49,630 One of her meetings. She'll be ages 388 00:44:49,655 --> 00:44:52,601 and be rat-arsed when she gets in. 389 00:44:52,626 --> 00:44:53,722 I see. 390 00:44:57,067 --> 00:44:58,351 Did you want to book? 391 00:45:01,775 --> 00:45:04,112 Cos if you did, you could book direct with me. 392 00:45:04,137 --> 00:45:05,831 Then I could keep the money. 393 00:45:05,856 --> 00:45:07,911 It could be just our arrangement. 394 00:45:14,547 --> 00:45:17,161 She tell you what it was? 395 00:45:17,186 --> 00:45:18,552 Shilling for ordinary. 396 00:45:19,655 --> 00:45:21,831 This isn't ordinary. 397 00:45:21,856 --> 00:45:23,681 It never is, Mr Cust. 398 00:45:23,706 --> 00:45:25,351 It never is. 399 00:46:01,577 --> 00:46:04,041 I see what you're doing! Whore! 400 00:46:04,067 --> 00:46:06,242 For God's sake! I see what you are! Capstick! 401 00:46:06,266 --> 00:46:09,601 She's the secretary, she's staff. 402 00:46:09,626 --> 00:46:11,960 She's trying to take you away from me, Car. 403 00:46:11,985 --> 00:46:14,442 Come on, my darling. Come on, let's get you to bed. 404 00:46:14,467 --> 00:46:19,681 She can't wait for me to be dead. 405 00:46:29,757 --> 00:46:32,402 Sorry, Thora. She doesn't mean any of it. 406 00:46:32,427 --> 00:46:33,880 It's not really her speaking. 407 00:46:44,186 --> 00:46:45,322 Thank you, Lily. 408 00:46:45,347 --> 00:46:47,161 Mr Cust. 409 00:47:06,186 --> 00:47:08,351 Yes, Mr Treadgold. 410 00:48:25,777 --> 00:48:28,831 Warrant to search and seize evidence pertaining to crime, 411 00:48:28,856 --> 00:48:31,472 evidence which you have withheld from the proper authorities. 412 00:48:31,498 --> 00:48:36,693 When I tried to tell you about it, you told me it was April Fools' Day. 413 00:48:36,976 --> 00:48:40,443 Please listen to me, Inspector Crome. 414 00:48:40,467 --> 00:48:43,163 A copy of the ABC railway guide 415 00:48:43,188 --> 00:48:48,362 was left beside the bodies of both dead women. Do you know why? 416 00:48:48,856 --> 00:48:52,952 It is the killer telling us "les regles du jeu" 417 00:48:52,976 --> 00:48:54,913 the rules of the game. 418 00:48:54,938 --> 00:48:56,952 Every railway line, 419 00:48:56,976 --> 00:49:02,112 any station, in the country, all letters of the alphabet. 420 00:49:02,257 --> 00:49:05,393 That is private! Warrant. 421 00:49:13,137 --> 00:49:16,523 "Dear Monsieur Poirot, my wife and I think 422 00:49:16,547 --> 00:49:18,342 "you're really rather marvellous." 423 00:49:20,137 --> 00:49:22,831 Old fan letters. Sweet. 424 00:49:24,297 --> 00:49:26,472 Pack the lot. You don't need them. 425 00:49:26,498 --> 00:49:28,443 He knows you, 426 00:49:28,467 --> 00:49:29,702 the killer 427 00:49:31,726 --> 00:49:33,672 so we'll be going through everything. 428 00:49:33,697 --> 00:49:35,983 Nothing's private any more. 429 00:49:36,007 --> 00:49:38,313 This was on the mat. 430 00:49:38,338 --> 00:49:39,632 I'll read it to you. 431 00:49:41,827 --> 00:49:43,831 What is the postmark? 432 00:49:45,338 --> 00:49:47,952 Cricklewood. 433 00:49:47,976 --> 00:49:50,163 "Hello, Hercule." 434 00:49:50,188 --> 00:49:52,751 "Betty was a pretty girl, wasn't she? 435 00:49:52,777 --> 00:49:54,063 "There was a moment 436 00:49:54,088 --> 00:49:57,831 "when she realised that death was waiting with open arms. 437 00:49:57,856 --> 00:50:00,163 "She surrendered to me 438 00:50:00,188 --> 00:50:04,163 "and I leaned over her and inhaled her last breath 439 00:50:06,217 --> 00:50:10,393 "..drew it into my mouth and it tasted so sweet. 440 00:50:10,418 --> 00:50:12,992 "I felt my blood sing with its sweetness. 441 00:50:14,577 --> 00:50:16,393 "But I'm tired, Hercule, 442 00:50:16,418 --> 00:50:20,163 "so we'll have a little rest and we'll pick up where we left off. 443 00:50:22,418 --> 00:50:23,992 "Chin-chin." 444 00:50:33,856 --> 00:50:36,913 Telephone the doctor now. I'm not here for domestic duties. 445 00:50:36,938 --> 00:50:39,952 You telephone the doctor or get one of the maids to do it. 446 00:50:39,976 --> 00:50:42,353 I am carrying a bowl of her ladyship's blood that she's 447 00:50:42,378 --> 00:50:45,672 just coughed up and the maids are changing her blood-soaked sheets 448 00:50:45,697 --> 00:50:48,913 so get off your skinny arse and telephone the doctor. Now. 449 00:51:12,777 --> 00:51:14,913 Thora, tell him to hurry. 450 00:51:14,938 --> 00:51:16,802 She's in a lot of pain. 451 00:51:16,827 --> 00:51:18,603 Of course. 452 00:51:48,097 --> 00:51:51,193 I'll send a constable morning and evening to collect your post. 453 00:51:51,217 --> 00:51:53,961 And don't make any more day trips to crime scenes. 454 00:51:53,987 --> 00:51:56,242 You will not catch ABC without me. 455 00:51:56,268 --> 00:51:57,523 Yes, I will. 456 00:51:58,807 --> 00:52:02,353 My friend Inspector Japp had the grace and wit 457 00:52:02,378 --> 00:52:06,193 to know the limitations of his intellect. 458 00:52:06,217 --> 00:52:08,831 I wish you had one ounce of his humility. 459 00:52:10,268 --> 00:52:13,193 Your friend, Japp, who you deceived, who you lied to for years. 460 00:52:13,217 --> 00:52:14,552 I never lied. 461 00:52:14,577 --> 00:52:17,523 You told him you were a policeman in Belgium before the war, 462 00:52:17,547 --> 00:52:19,523 a detective, but you weren't. 463 00:52:19,547 --> 00:52:22,992 Questions were asked about you, high up in the food chain. 464 00:52:23,018 --> 00:52:26,632 Questions about me? Why? I have served this country. 465 00:52:26,657 --> 00:52:30,603 People don't like it when the force are made to look like half-wits 466 00:52:30,628 --> 00:52:32,193 by a foreigner. 467 00:52:32,217 --> 00:52:35,603 It's out of step with the public mood so questions were asked. 468 00:52:35,628 --> 00:52:37,913 Japp swore that you were genuine. 469 00:52:37,938 --> 00:52:40,603 That was him, loyal as a dog. 470 00:52:41,907 --> 00:52:45,913 But you were looked into and there's no record of you. 471 00:52:45,938 --> 00:52:50,032 You are lucky you never lived through an invasion. 472 00:52:50,057 --> 00:52:52,711 Things are burnt. Buildings. People. 473 00:52:52,737 --> 00:52:54,603 Records turned to ash. 474 00:52:54,628 --> 00:52:57,552 No-one had ever heard your name. 475 00:52:59,068 --> 00:53:01,193 No Hercule Poirot registered 476 00:53:01,217 --> 00:53:04,322 anywhere in the Belgian police before 1914. 477 00:53:04,347 --> 00:53:07,242 Japp staked his reputation, his whole career on you 478 00:53:07,268 --> 00:53:08,793 and that was him over. 479 00:53:08,818 --> 00:53:12,432 His funeral should have been packed, a guard of honour, 480 00:53:12,458 --> 00:53:16,353 but all he got was a handful of old timers and you and me. 481 00:53:16,378 --> 00:53:21,393 He didn't die of a heart attack. I reckon he just broke. 482 00:53:21,418 --> 00:53:24,072 And that's down to you and your lying. 483 00:53:24,097 --> 00:53:25,523 He told me none of this. 484 00:53:25,547 --> 00:53:27,523 Inspector Crome, 485 00:53:27,547 --> 00:53:30,043 I gave my word to the dead. 486 00:53:30,068 --> 00:53:33,882 I cannot abandon them. I must not. 487 00:53:35,657 --> 00:53:37,913 Your word is worthless. 488 00:53:39,378 --> 00:53:42,163 You're not who you say you are. 489 00:53:42,188 --> 00:53:43,632 Who the hell are you? 490 00:54:00,137 --> 00:54:01,793 Ils arrivent! 491 00:54:03,938 --> 00:54:05,273 Ils arrivent! 36346

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