subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for Il.secondo.Tragico.Fantozzi

Afrikaans

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic Download

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bengali

Bosnian

Bulgarian Download

Catalan

Cebuano

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English

Esperanto

Estonian

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek Download

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Khmer

Korean

Kurdish (Kurmanji)

Kyrgyz

Lao

Latin

Latvian

Lithuanian

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Nepali

Norwegian

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese

Punjabi

Romanian

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Sesotho

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhala

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Telugu

Thai

Turkish

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Odia (Oriya)

Kinyarwanda

Turkmen

Tatar

Uyghur

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,074 Subtitles downloaded from www.SubtitleDB.org 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.SubtitleDB.org today 3 00:00:54,301 --> 00:00:56,921 Hello, good evening! Good morning, Mrs... 4 00:00:57,091 --> 00:00:59,191 Duchess of Earl Margherita Semenzara! 5 00:00:59,511 --> 00:01:03,231 How did I know it was you? No, I did not know, you swore it was you... 6 00:01:03,491 --> 00:01:06,031 I recognized your noble voice. 7 00:01:06,121 --> 00:01:09,361 Do you want to talk to your Noble Lord Husband? 8 00:01:09,731 --> 00:01:13,851 He is in a session since yesterday evening in the Grand Council of the 10 absenthees. 9 00:01:14,021 --> 00:01:16,661 I have clear instructions not to interrupt them, 10 00:01:17,081 --> 00:01:19,651 But if you insist, Ah, you do not insist, you... 11 00:01:19,752 --> 00:01:21,354 ...command it. 12 00:01:21,511 --> 00:01:24,271 Then, just a moment, I'll put you in touch with the council. 13 00:01:24,711 --> 00:01:25,761 Just a moment... 14 00:01:25,911 --> 00:01:28,211 Hello, Council of the 10 absenthees. 15 00:01:28,431 --> 00:01:31,791 It's for our Count Semenzara, from his wife Lady Duchess... Duchess Conde... 16 00:01:31,972 --> 00:01:33,491 Wait - Wait a moment. 17 00:01:33,592 --> 00:01:36,313 Just a moment My Lady, Here is your husband. 18 00:01:40,241 --> 00:01:45,691 Ciao, I'm here, my jealous one! Did you think I was out partying with hookers? 19 00:01:46,241 --> 00:01:49,400 Semenzara does not do stupid things. Semenzara works even at night... 20 00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:51,236 to keep you and the family well. 21 00:01:51,391 --> 00:01:53,161 He is not scared of your controls. 22 00:01:53,211 --> 00:01:55,741 But now please,I need to go, must partecipate to a vote. 23 00:01:55,742 --> 00:01:56,844 Ciao, ciao... 24 00:01:59,242 --> 00:02:00,091 What did you say? 25 00:02:00,131 --> 00:02:04,511 Nothing, he spoke a bit faster because he needs to go voting. 26 00:02:05,401 --> 00:02:08,561 He said to sleep peacefully... 27 00:02:08,911 --> 00:02:13,831 That's good. Good night, good day, good bye Lady Duchess Cond... 28 00:02:36,933 --> 00:02:43,851 - Who's here!? - Fantozzi Ugo, accountant, Registration 7829/bis. Doing overtime. 29 00:02:43,886 --> 00:02:45,521 You could have warned me!? 30 00:02:46,293 --> 00:02:50,431 Sorry Mr. Nightguard, if I have frightened you. 31 00:02:57,793 --> 00:03:01,971 Thank you, good morning. Good night. Mr. Nightguard, see you soon. 32 00:03:08,831 --> 00:03:11,441 33 00:03:17,161 --> 00:03:18,391 Good morning, miss... 34 00:03:25,541 --> 00:03:29,341 No! Your colleague has already shot me upstairs! 35 00:03:29,651 --> 00:03:34,311 I promise, next time I'll do it with you. Good year, good bye! 36 00:03:46,671 --> 00:03:49,281 - We are waiting for you. - We are waiting for you. 37 00:03:51,928 --> 00:03:53,626 WE ARE WAITING FOR YOU 38 00:04:41,851 --> 00:04:43,181 Let me through! 39 00:04:45,409 --> 00:04:47,939 Please! They expect me home! 40 00:04:50,353 --> 00:04:52,272 On the chassis... The crystals, no! 41 00:04:52,273 --> 00:04:55,297 - Take this! - You miserable scoundrel! 42 00:04:55,298 --> 00:04:58,074 ...You think you own the road? 43 00:05:32,811 --> 00:05:37,344 How often should I say, I should... should... 44 00:05:37,745 --> 00:05:41,949 Go home because I've just finished to work!!! 45 00:06:30,921 --> 00:06:33,441 Here, accountant, Extremely urgent. 46 00:06:33,660 --> 00:06:36,457 Surveyor??. F 7. 47 00:06:36,882 --> 00:06:38,676 Damn, in the first turn!. 48 00:06:38,767 --> 00:06:41,151 - I stroke a cruiser. - Well!. 49 00:06:41,991 --> 00:06:44,471 - I'd start with n. 27 this morning - Good, and you? 50 00:06:45,041 --> 00:06:47,011 The series of 5 to 8, per 100,000 liras. 51 00:06:47,391 --> 00:06:48,401 Let's get on with it. 52 00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:56,699 For the selection of the employee that should accompany 53 00:06:56,700 --> 00:07:02,117 Our Mega Director Clamoroso Duke Conde Pier Carlo Ingeniero Semenzara... 54 00:07:02,271 --> 00:07:07,121 to play in Monte Carlo, there was a terrible draw... 55 00:07:07,171 --> 00:07:10,551 For which there was also the partecipation of the internal committee. 56 00:07:11,551 --> 00:07:16,761 The organizer of the ceremony, was the accountant Filini, of the Claims Office. 57 00:07:18,001 --> 00:07:19,351 Attention! 58 00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:27,771 - Let's proceed! - S�, your Excellence. 59 00:07:28,981 --> 00:07:30,111 Miss Silvani! 60 00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:32,17 Pardon me! 61 00:07:32,381 --> 00:07:34,471 Ms Silvani of Calboni! 62 00:07:34,801 --> 00:07:36,306 - Me? - S�. 63 00:07:36,341 --> 00:07:40,335 chosen to withdraw from the urn name chosen, Ms. Calboni... 64 00:07:40,336 --> 00:07:42,184 ex Miss Silvani. 65 00:07:42,261 --> 00:07:44,761 And ex great desperate love of Fantozzi. 66 00:07:44,941 --> 00:07:49,831 ...since she married, he dared not touch her even with his thoughts. 67 00:07:49,866 --> 00:07:52,781 - Excuse me if I turn my back ... - I blindfold... 68 00:07:53,031 --> 00:07:55,323 - Sorry. - Easy. 69 00:07:57,381 --> 00:07:58,561 - Do you see anything? - No! 70 00:08:01,241 --> 00:08:03,551 The occasion was thruly horrendous... 71 00:08:03,591 --> 00:08:06,911 3 days in Monte Carlo, to see Semenzara play. 72 00:08:07,361 --> 00:08:10,511 And if he suspected that his companion brought him good luck... 73 00:08:10,611 --> 00:08:12,601 Then your life would be settled... 74 00:08:16,292 --> 00:08:17,882 Sweet heart of Jesus, (prayer)... 75 00:08:20,915 --> 00:08:23,145 76 00:08:23,541 --> 00:08:24,514 Be quiet! 77 00:08:25,196 --> 00:08:26,220 Who's praying? 78 00:08:30,682 --> 00:08:31,532 Thanks. 79 00:08:45,071 --> 00:08:48,781 Registration 7829/bis. 80 00:08:53,891 --> 00:08:58,501 Fantozzi remained in a state of apparent death, for more than four hours. 81 00:08:59,101 --> 00:09:02,731 - Congratulations Fantozzi! - Well done, fatty! 82 00:09:02,733 --> 00:09:04,596 To Fantozzi! 83 00:09:04,661 --> 00:09:08,477 Hip, hip, hip, hurra! Hip, hip, hip, hurra! 84 00:09:10,701 --> 00:09:12,071 Again congratulations! 85 00:09:12,181 --> 00:09:15,107 Thank you, please drink. Drink to my health... 86 00:09:15,108 --> 00:09:16,602 At least say thanks to me. 87 00:09:16,923 --> 00:09:17,614 For what? 88 00:09:18,423 --> 00:09:21,311 It was my wife's doing. 89 00:09:21,381 --> 00:09:24,201 Let's say I have been your fortune goddess, Fantozzi. 90 00:09:24,721 --> 00:09:27,852 I must thank you. Would you like a drink? 91 00:09:27,891 --> 00:09:32,629 No thanks. But do me a favour. Come. 92 00:09:32,982 --> 00:09:34,163 S�, where? 93 00:09:35,381 --> 00:09:37,180 Such luck! It's disgusting! 94 00:09:37,215 --> 00:09:39,315 - He's been kissed by luck... - I hate him! 95 00:09:40,151 --> 00:09:42,913 Here, take these! 96 00:09:43,111 --> 00:09:44,781 Do you want me to exchange them? 97 00:09:45,211 --> 00:09:48,691 No, Fantozzi. You must play them at the roulette. 98 00:09:49,791 --> 00:09:50,711 For me. 99 00:09:51,791 --> 00:09:55,121 But, is your husband ok with this? Does he know? 100 00:09:55,211 --> 00:09:57,951 But we are a modern couple, We are open minded. 101 00:09:59,371 --> 00:10:00,741 Play it on the 27, Fantozzi. 102 00:10:01,411 --> 00:10:02,751 S�. 103 00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:04,341 ...When you feel it's the right moment. 104 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:09,471 27, it's my age. 105 00:10:12,131 --> 00:10:17,063 Oh, to think I would have played at the most the 14... Or even 4. 106 00:10:18,351 --> 00:10:19,941 Goodbye Pina! Ciao Mari�ngela! 107 00:10:20,101 --> 00:10:22,391 Ah, here is the tra... tra... train... 108 00:10:23,421 --> 00:10:29,731 Well, we have to admit, we are slightly early. 109 00:10:29,891 --> 00:10:32,921 the train to Montecarlo departed at 23:37. 110 00:10:33,281 --> 00:10:36,601 Fantozzi arrived at the station at 4:12 in the afternoon. 111 00:10:36,841 --> 00:10:38,271 7 hours earlier! 112 00:10:38,291 --> 00:10:40,211 With him, Ms. Pina, and Mariangela. 113 00:10:40,601 --> 00:10:42,831 To see his triumphal departure. 114 00:10:45,861 --> 00:10:47,961 There he is! The Duke Conde! 115 00:10:49,026 --> 00:10:50,746 Good morning, Master! 116 00:10:50,821 --> 00:10:53,721 Make way for the Duke Conde! 117 00:10:55,051 --> 00:10:56,801 Make way for Conde Semenzara! 118 00:10:57,411 --> 00:11:01,431 Sir Duke Conde, if you allow me the honour of introducing you my...! 119 00:11:02,591 --> 00:11:05,841 Who are those loosers? Who do you want to introduce me to!? 120 00:11:06,351 --> 00:11:12,321 Nobody. I wanted to present my apologies for having slighly touched you with my elbow... 121 00:11:12,651 --> 00:11:14,501 So you do not have any relation with those witches? 122 00:11:15,071 --> 00:11:17,921 No, never seen them in my life, don't know them at all! 123 00:11:18,431 --> 00:11:20,481 - Then don't look at them! - No, I don't! 124 00:11:20,482 --> 00:11:22,313 - And touch yourself, by Judas! - Yes, I touch myself! 125 00:11:23,941 --> 00:11:25,621 I hope they will not get on our train. 126 00:11:25,821 --> 00:11:27,231 No, I don't think so... 127 00:11:31,771 --> 00:11:34,151 I believe they are going away, 128 00:11:34,906 --> 00:11:36,408 yes, they are going away. 129 00:11:38,251 --> 00:11:40,281 Gone now. 130 00:11:40,881 --> 00:11:43,142 - That's better! - That's better! 131 00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:46,511 Pardon me, I just take my suitcase, 132 00:11:47,391 --> 00:11:49,991 Even a purple suitcase, that brings bad luck! 133 00:11:52,221 --> 00:11:54,411 By the way, You have no luggage? 134 00:11:55,071 --> 00:11:57,321 No, no luggage. 135 00:11:58,271 --> 00:11:59,471 Not even a briefcase? 136 00:12:00,041 --> 00:12:03,021 ...I have a nice one back home, 137 00:12:03,441 --> 00:12:05,471 but I do not bring it to the station, 138 00:12:06,191 --> 00:12:07,351 because... they'd steal it... 139 00:12:07,911 --> 00:12:11,771 But i have everything on me: 5 shirts, 12 pairs of pants... 140 00:12:11,806 --> 00:12:12,921 and 16 pairs of socks. 141 00:12:14,531 --> 00:12:15,191 There's the train! 142 00:12:15,361 --> 00:12:16,841 Let me, Duke Conde! 143 00:12:18,481 --> 00:12:19,991 Stay still! Just a moment! 144 00:12:21,231 --> 00:12:23,871 - What's the meaning of this? - quiet with those hands! 145 00:12:25,301 --> 00:12:26,601 The Duke Conde is mine! 146 00:12:27,881 --> 00:12:29,031 All taken! 147 00:12:30,021 --> 00:12:32,441 Taken, taken taken... 148 00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:36,021 It's all busy!. I took the whole compartment! 149 00:12:36,531 --> 00:12:38,951 But... young man, Have you ever booked a sleeping cabin? 150 00:12:42,991 --> 00:12:45,041 No sorry... 151 00:12:45,521 --> 00:12:47,751 These are booked. I booked cabin n.18. 152 00:12:47,961 --> 00:12:49,211 18? 153 00:12:50,431 --> 00:12:51,761 Sir Count... 154 00:12:52,231 --> 00:12:54,511 Come then, Count. N. 18? 155 00:12:54,771 --> 00:12:56,401 Come, I'm at your service... 156 00:12:57,051 --> 00:12:58,111 Let's clean it... 157 00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,051 What the hell are you doing? 158 00:13:00,601 --> 00:13:03,171 Here, I think, it's your... 159 00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:04,481 ...bid�. 160 00:13:05,111 --> 00:13:05,841 What? 161 00:13:05,931 --> 00:13:06,931 What is this? 162 00:13:10,711 --> 00:13:12,312 - Ddi you get hurt? - It's nothing... 163 00:13:12,371 --> 00:13:14,931 Only lost functionality of the first two phalanges. 164 00:13:15,111 --> 00:13:18,681 Pinkie and ring finger. Sorry, I'll just get my hand back. 165 00:13:20,781 --> 00:13:27,211 Oh, here is also your glass, to drink during the night... 166 00:13:29,371 --> 00:13:32,881 Oh, of course. This is for your noble needs. 167 00:13:33,241 --> 00:13:35,131 Can I Undress you, Conde Duque Lord? 168 00:13:35,381 --> 00:13:37,201 No, no, no! Go to your cabin. 169 00:13:37,271 --> 00:13:40,281 I don't have a cabin... To avoid being a weight on the company, 170 00:13:40,751 --> 00:13:41,541 I took a 2nd class ticket... 171 00:13:41,941 --> 00:13:43,941 As you know, 3rd class has been abolished. 172 00:13:44,376 --> 00:13:46,441 If it's allowed, I'd prefer to sleep on the floor... 173 00:13:46,471 --> 00:13:47,721 Curled up next to your bed... 174 00:13:47,722 --> 00:13:49,441 Not allowed, not allowed! 175 00:13:50,831 --> 00:13:52,631 Well, then if you consent it, I will retire to my compartment. 176 00:13:56,051 --> 00:13:59,401 - Clear. - Go to 2a. you'll see, it will be very comfortable. 177 00:13:59,403 --> 00:14:00,405 Good night. 178 00:14:07,581 --> 00:14:10,111 Tickets please... 179 00:14:16,211 --> 00:14:18,081 I hope you're in good shape, young man. 180 00:14:18,181 --> 00:14:20,811 Cause I've been awake all night in that bloody bed. 181 00:14:20,837 --> 00:14:23,881 - I was right above the wheels! - Oh, I was rather comfy. 182 00:14:23,921 --> 00:14:25,371 - Good evening. - Good evening dear. 183 00:14:25,721 --> 00:14:29,311 The Duke, like all people possessed by the demon of game... 184 00:14:29,351 --> 00:14:33,121 was very superstitious and used extravagant rituals. 185 00:14:33,171 --> 00:14:35,791 Do, re, mi, Good Luck comes here. 186 00:14:35,851 --> 00:14:38,711 Re, mi, fa, Good luck comes this side. 187 00:14:38,781 --> 00:14:41,401 Si, do, re, Good luck does not go there. 188 00:14:44,781 --> 00:14:45,791 Pardon me... 189 00:14:46,631 --> 00:14:47,801 Chips! 190 00:14:52,201 --> 00:14:55,561 One moment, not a bet... 191 00:14:58,691 --> 00:14:59,961 Here you go, Duke!. Mr Conde Duke. 192 00:15:01,591 --> 00:15:02,631 Sit down. 193 00:15:05,491 --> 00:15:09,291 Sorry, Mr Conde Duke, Actually I have no chair. 194 00:15:09,591 --> 00:15:11,301 - Sit anyway! - Anyway... 195 00:15:12,901 --> 00:15:14,151 Done. 196 00:15:14,311 --> 00:15:15,491 And touch my ass! 197 00:15:16,491 --> 00:15:18,671 But, How do I do that...? 198 00:15:18,821 --> 00:15:21,152 Put your hand under! Just do it! 199 00:15:46,974 --> 00:15:48,427 Nine! 200 00:15:49,351 --> 00:15:50,391 What's happening? 201 00:15:50,791 --> 00:15:52,761 My foot was under yours, Sir Duke Conde. 202 00:15:52,931 --> 00:15:55,801 Put back immediatly your foot under mine. Do not interrupt the fluid. 203 00:15:56,131 --> 00:15:57,961 everything must stay as when I won. 204 00:15:58,391 --> 00:15:59,931 - And keep it on with my ass. - I keep on... 205 00:16:00,251 --> 00:16:01,781 ...touching your ass... - A million? 206 00:16:02,471 --> 00:16:03,511 A million. 207 00:16:13,258 --> 00:16:15,059 Eight! 208 00:16:17,951 --> 00:16:20,721 A horrible sufference, but short... 209 00:16:20,831 --> 00:16:24,121 Because in the span of two hands, Semenzara lost everything ...... 210 00:16:24,181 --> 00:16:27,010 and went under of 22 kilos of chips. 211 00:16:34,131 --> 00:16:35,991 And stop touching my ass!! 212 00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:51,286 But, at about 3 am, the Conde Duke had a stroke of luck 213 00:16:51,287 --> 00:16:53,562 ...and won a clamorous prize. 214 00:16:56,267 --> 00:16:57,811 What were you doing just then? 215 00:16:58,481 --> 00:17:01,071 Me? I allowed myself to drink few drops of mineral sparkling water. 216 00:17:01,591 --> 00:17:03,961 Bravo, bravo! Keep doing that! 217 00:17:04,091 --> 00:17:08,241 Valet, bring immediately 25 bottles of mineral water, 218 00:17:08,242 --> 00:17:09,244 ...Of the same brand! 219 00:17:09,391 --> 00:17:11,921 It was the terrible "Acqua Berthier", 220 00:17:11,991 --> 00:17:14,021 The gassiest on the planet... 221 00:17:15,441 --> 00:17:16,681 Nine! 222 00:17:18,271 --> 00:17:19,681 Drink, drink! 223 00:17:20,251 --> 00:17:21,071 Sorry... 224 00:17:31,591 --> 00:17:36,771 - What is your rank in the company?. - Me? Twelfth. The lowest. 225 00:17:37,051 --> 00:17:38,661 I upgrade you at the 11�. 226 00:17:39,091 --> 00:17:42,951 ...With my own personal desk, and fake leather chair? 227 00:17:43,061 --> 00:17:44,871 S�, s�. But keep drinking! 228 00:17:46,641 --> 00:17:50,641 In 2 hours Fantozzi drunk 4 boxes of "Berthier"... 229 00:17:50,871 --> 00:17:53,541 Equivalent to 3 cubic meters of compressed gas. 230 00:17:54,111 --> 00:17:57,121 Therefore it had to be anchored like a balloon.. 231 00:18:07,511 --> 00:18:08,961 No, no. Give me back the chair. 232 00:18:10,041 --> 00:18:12,541 - Give me the chair. - Quiet, quiet. 233 00:18:14,721 --> 00:18:16,871 It may fall on someone's head. 234 00:18:17,991 --> 00:18:19,791 This is the casino's chair. Go now. 235 00:18:20,871 --> 00:18:22,838 On the bright side, during those 2 hours... 236 00:18:22,839 --> 00:18:26,273 He climbed with mad speed all the Company's hierarchical steps. 237 00:18:26,341 --> 00:18:27,691 even 3 by 3... 238 00:18:28,181 --> 00:18:29,466 Employee of 7th rank: 239 00:18:29,601 --> 00:18:32,381 mahogany desk, and artificial leather armchair, 240 00:18:32,841 --> 00:18:35,366 phone, ficus plant, symbol of power. 241 00:18:35,461 --> 00:18:39,332 Fifth rank: opaline lamp, flat glass,, 242 00:18:39,333 --> 00:18:42,680 Painting "naif" from Yugoslavia on the wall, 2 ficus. 243 00:18:42,871 --> 00:18:44,151 First rank: 244 00:18:44,401 --> 00:18:47,702 4 ficus, 3 phones, dictaphone, 245 00:18:47,703 --> 00:18:50,732 six "naif" paintings, rug on the floor. 246 00:18:50,751 --> 00:18:53,241 He had come to the threshold of leadership 247 00:18:53,351 --> 00:18:55,941 ie greenhouse of ficus, 248 00:18:56,211 --> 00:18:58,151 and armchair in human skin, 249 00:18:58,401 --> 00:19:02,581 when fortune turned away ruinously from Semenzara 250 00:19:25,061 --> 00:19:27,151 You ruined me, idiot! 251 00:19:27,321 --> 00:19:28,981 Retire! Vanish. 252 00:19:29,151 --> 00:19:32,901 Idiot, king of the idiots! 253 00:20:00,051 --> 00:20:00,996 Hei, hei, hei! Drop that ashtray! 254 00:20:01,031 --> 00:20:03,841 It belongs to the Casino! where are you going, give it back! 255 00:20:29,361 --> 00:20:30,461 Forgive me... 256 00:20:38,923 --> 00:20:41,959 "play them at Roulette when inspiration will come " 257 00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,844 "Twenty-seven, as my age." 258 00:20:46,031 --> 00:20:49,381 "Dad, did you get me a gift this time?" 259 00:20:52,851 --> 00:20:56,831 - No more! - Wait, I bet here! I put 20,000 to 27! 260 00:21:15,528 --> 00:21:17,417 27, red and odd! 261 00:21:17,418 --> 00:21:19,329 Here, it's me! 262 00:21:20,330 --> 00:21:21,381 - Sorry ... - To whom does this belong? 263 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:23,141 It's mine. 264 00:21:26,521 --> 00:21:27,281 Yes of course. 265 00:21:27,561 --> 00:21:32,061 Of course it belongs to the Duke Conde. 266 00:21:32,091 --> 00:21:36,611 I would never dare to play, even less, to win. 267 00:21:36,741 --> 00:21:38,381 268 00:21:38,461 --> 00:21:41,731 Excuse me, How much is the winning? 269 00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,961 - 700 thousand liras. - Ah, good! 270 00:21:46,808 --> 00:21:48,702 With that blood money 271 00:21:48,703 --> 00:21:51,700 Semenzara paid the bill of his suite at the Grand Hotel. 272 00:21:51,906 --> 00:21:56,056 With the remaining amount, 2 whores, and a bed cabin for the way back on the train. 273 00:21:56,857 --> 00:22:00,167 Fantozzi instead, had to find a different solution with his own means. 274 00:22:08,371 --> 00:22:10,461 Ughino, Look how you've become. 275 00:22:10,771 --> 00:22:12,451 All stuck... 276 00:22:15,001 --> 00:22:16,821 Can't even speak... 277 00:22:17,841 --> 00:22:20,971 Now I will heal you with grandma's flaxseeds... 278 00:22:21,241 --> 00:22:22,551 279 00:22:23,581 --> 00:22:26,351 - Are you happy? - No, no! - I'll go to the kitchen and back... 280 00:22:32,531 --> 00:22:34,321 Here is a lukewarm one. 281 00:22:34,411 --> 00:22:37,081 Then I'll bring you another hotter. 282 00:22:39,171 --> 00:22:43,171 At that temperature, Fantozzi always fell in a mystical ecstasy... 283 00:22:59,531 --> 00:23:05,611 This time he saw the archangel Gabriel which announced his upcoming motherhood. 284 00:23:26,701 --> 00:23:28,441 Opening of the hunting season. 285 00:23:29,231 --> 00:23:31,351 This year, again dragged by the implacable Filini ... 286 00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:34,131 always possessed by ideas of new and tragic initiatives... 287 00:23:34,232 --> 00:23:35,234 Fantozzi also 288 00:23:35,331 --> 00:23:36,621 decided to partecipate 289 00:23:37,041 --> 00:23:38,961 Filini's equipment: 290 00:23:38,971 --> 00:23:42,140 Sherlock Holmes hat, with Robin Hood style feather, 291 00:23:42,641 --> 00:23:47,231 An Argentine poncho that belonged to a rich aunt, tennis shoes with galoshes over 292 00:23:47,371 --> 00:23:48,411 Topografic maps... 293 00:23:48,431 --> 00:23:50,711 And a Calabrian bandit's trombone. 294 00:23:51,261 --> 00:23:52,361 Fantozzi: 295 00:23:52,801 --> 00:23:55,777 white hat, sailor style, of his daughter Mari�ngela ... 296 00:23:55,800 --> 00:24:00,080 Painfully normal jacket, tight at the waist by a gigantic cartridge belt, 297 00:24:00,081 --> 00:24:03,160 ...machine gun, a 2nd World War residue, 298 00:24:03,161 --> 00:24:06,831 sling, viper bite serum, 299 00:24:06,832 --> 00:24:10,731 canary in a cage, and hunting stray cat... 300 00:24:10,732 --> 00:24:13,311 who immediately fled at the beginning of the operation... 301 00:24:14,501 --> 00:24:15,541 How wonderful!! 302 00:24:17,041 --> 00:24:18,491 This is a paradise on Earth! 303 00:24:19,201 --> 00:24:19,971 Breath! 304 00:24:20,741 --> 00:24:21,831 Too bad, mr. Accountant! 305 00:24:22,171 --> 00:24:22,981 What? 306 00:24:23,041 --> 00:24:25,481 That you could not bring your Albertuccia. 307 00:24:25,561 --> 00:24:26,196 ...Albertuccia? 308 00:24:26,231 --> 00:24:28,481 I mean, Albertina, the baboon! 309 00:24:28,581 --> 00:24:30,071 Your daughter... 310 00:24:30,341 --> 00:24:33,500 - Ah, Mariangela! - Of Course. 311 00:24:33,501 --> 00:24:34,641 She surely would have had fun... 312 00:24:34,642 --> 00:24:36,001 Jumping from tree to tree. 313 00:24:36,321 --> 00:24:37,256 What do you mean, from tree to tree? 314 00:24:37,291 --> 00:24:38,751 No, I meant, from meadow to meadow! 315 00:24:38,761 --> 00:24:40,671 But here we are really out of the world, Where are we? 316 00:24:40,841 --> 00:24:43,467 We are exactly in this place, Can you see it? 317 00:24:43,668 --> 00:24:46,301 - Your feather... - Do you see it? 318 00:24:46,691 --> 00:24:50,191 Actually I do not see anything, Your feather is piercing my eye... 319 00:24:50,371 --> 00:24:52,301 here is a famous hill, 320 00:24:52,741 --> 00:24:55,841 practically no man has even been there. 321 00:24:55,861 --> 00:24:58,181 It is a place that nobody knows! 322 00:25:00,021 --> 00:25:05,031 < 620 hunters in 14 square meters. 323 00:25:31,221 --> 00:25:33,681 It's mine! Whatever it is, is mine. 324 00:25:33,716 --> 00:25:36,141 325 00:25:36,481 --> 00:25:39,801 It was Margheriti, knight of the Instituto Case Popolari. 326 00:25:40,161 --> 00:25:43,411 Ex regional champion of bird whistling imitation. 327 00:25:43,571 --> 00:25:44,971 It's mine, I said! 328 00:25:49,231 --> 00:25:51,931 After 6 minutes, Industrial consultant Carletti... 329 00:25:51,941 --> 00:25:55,261 Called "the hare" because of a congenital malformation to the upper lip... 330 00:25:55,691 --> 00:25:59,751 felt unconfortably observed... 331 00:26:00,552 --> 00:26:03,054 - There! - Let's get him! 332 00:26:08,891 --> 00:26:12,481 But you... You're not a man! You are a hyena! 333 00:26:13,661 --> 00:26:15,981 Yes, that's right, He is a hyena! 334 00:26:16,881 --> 00:26:18,551 And a very good specimen! 335 00:26:31,441 --> 00:26:35,031 Let's not get confused! Let's split in groups. 336 00:26:35,151 --> 00:26:37,881 Now, married guys to the hill, and singles to the valley. 337 00:26:38,251 --> 00:26:40,211 Yeah! Let's go! 338 00:26:43,331 --> 00:26:44,471 Is there a photographer?? 339 00:26:56,931 --> 00:26:58,151 Watch those hands!! 340 00:26:58,651 --> 00:27:00,451 Sorry, but the shotgun is mine! Where is your slingshot? 341 00:27:01,061 --> 00:27:02,031 Didn't you bring your slingshot? 342 00:27:02,131 --> 00:27:05,541 But you still did not shoot, we are the only ones who did not yet shoot today. 343 00:27:06,011 --> 00:27:07,131 What happened? 344 00:27:07,866 --> 00:27:08,941 What happened? 345 00:27:08,951 --> 00:27:10,046 Good morning, sir. 346 00:27:10,081 --> 00:27:12,700 It's that, we can't, eh... shoot. 347 00:27:13,101 --> 00:27:13,900 Let me see... 348 00:27:13,961 --> 00:27:15,021 - Do you know about it? - Some. 349 00:27:15,122 --> 00:27:18,606 - Let's see what's the problem. - But of course, it's not loaded! 350 00:27:22,431 --> 00:27:26,861 Look, Accountant, have you, by any chance, touched the trigger? 351 00:27:27,101 --> 00:27:28,321 I can't remember... 352 00:27:28,431 --> 00:27:32,241 Sorry, do you mind if I leave this here and I take yours instead? 353 00:27:33,531 --> 00:27:35,231 Well, see you soon and good hunting. 354 00:27:35,931 --> 00:27:38,011 See you. And watch out, huh. 355 00:27:38,681 --> 00:27:42,601 The ones with money came with armored vehicles, complete with personal guards. 356 00:27:43,961 --> 00:27:45,961 Bravo! Good shot Marquis! 357 00:27:52,031 --> 00:27:55,061 A megalomaniac rented a bomber! 358 00:28:07,761 --> 00:28:12,170 For a perfect slingshot strike, aim, 359 00:28:12,171 --> 00:28:15,950 keep the target in the middle of the fork, 360 00:28:15,951 --> 00:28:19,679 pull the elastic with strenght, until it comes to your ear, 361 00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:21,651 then let go... 362 00:28:31,761 --> 00:28:36,151 The poorest ones, counterattacked with the not less effective strategies of guerrilla. 363 00:28:45,881 --> 00:28:48,431 Help me! Help me, please! 364 00:28:52,311 --> 00:28:54,141 Attack! 365 00:28:58,751 --> 00:29:02,571 I now got hold of a good gun myself, Did you see? 366 00:29:02,961 --> 00:29:04,221 Look how nice! 367 00:29:04,821 --> 00:29:09,081 Enough slingshot! Now I can also shoot! 368 00:29:13,241 --> 00:29:14,921 Accountant, are you hurt? 369 00:29:15,851 --> 00:29:19,221 Absolutely... Only very ... ever so slightly ... 370 00:29:19,791 --> 00:29:21,171 I think I need a urologist... 371 00:29:26,801 --> 00:29:31,371 Look, for 2 left ears I can give you the index of the right hand... 372 00:29:32,191 --> 00:29:33,931 ...Of a lawyer. - With nail? 373 00:29:34,001 --> 00:29:37,881 - Yes, it's complete. Look how nice. - two ears... 374 00:29:38,911 --> 00:29:41,111 - Got a light, please? - Good morning. 375 00:29:41,281 --> 00:29:42,331 Good morning. How is it? 376 00:29:42,821 --> 00:29:44,781 My stomach burns. 377 00:29:47,821 --> 00:29:50,501 - I must be a bit nervous ... - What can we do ... 378 00:29:51,941 --> 00:29:54,681 Sometimes it's the nerves... 379 00:29:54,811 --> 00:29:56,581 Hey Accountant, Where's your gun? 380 00:29:57,481 --> 00:29:59,101 Mine? I always keep it... 381 00:30:01,901 --> 00:30:03,931 Come on! Be a man! 382 00:30:19,341 --> 00:30:21,061 C'mon Accountant, shoot now! 383 00:30:25,411 --> 00:30:28,701 He got it in the sleeve! A granade in the sleeve! Run! 384 00:30:42,671 --> 00:30:44,491 Go! 385 00:30:45,141 --> 00:30:48,061 Did you find it, Accountant? 386 00:30:48,381 --> 00:30:50,271 How do you feel? 387 00:30:50,991 --> 00:30:52,031 - Great! - Good. 388 00:31:02,311 --> 00:31:04,281 Hostilities ceased at sunset. 389 00:31:04,871 --> 00:31:08,845 They all returned home with their prey and trophies ... 390 00:31:08,846 --> 00:31:11,891 just in time to see the results of football. 391 00:31:12,581 --> 00:31:14,971 Next Sunday we'll be back and teach them a lesson. 392 00:31:15,211 --> 00:31:18,971 We can't, there's the trip to Genoa, for the baptism of the new starship Enterprise. 393 00:31:19,351 --> 00:31:22,001 - You can not miss. - I have an appointment with my brother ... 394 00:31:22,291 --> 00:31:25,641 We added it to the list! He owes me 5000 lira. 395 00:31:44,081 --> 00:31:48,381 Godmother of the baptism, the ineffable Countess Serbelloni Mazzanti Viendalmare ... 396 00:31:48,951 --> 00:31:50,831 great shareholder of the Company. 397 00:32:11,661 --> 00:32:13,531 Here, Countess! Your turn! 398 00:32:15,871 --> 00:32:19,941 From 32 meters distance la Serbelloni Mazzanti Viendalmare starts... 399 00:32:25,581 --> 00:32:27,871 Master of ceremony! Can I throw it? 400 00:32:28,431 --> 00:32:29,851 Throw it, Contessa, throw it! 401 00:32:42,981 --> 00:32:44,521 - Here, Contessa. - Another bottle? 402 00:32:44,671 --> 00:32:45,691 Yes, please. 403 00:32:47,571 --> 00:32:51,641 This time from 46 meters distance, la Serbelloni Mazzanti Viendalmare starts... 404 00:32:55,031 --> 00:32:58,311 Emcee! Can I re-throw it? 405 00:32:58,421 --> 00:33:00,701 Retry, Contessa! But aim more to the centre. 406 00:33:10,281 --> 00:33:15,291 Fantozzi decided to wait in the water till the end of the ceremony. 407 00:33:18,641 --> 00:33:22,351 Emcee! Can I retry again? 408 00:33:22,491 --> 00:33:25,991 Re-retry Contessa! But more to the right! 409 00:33:27,551 --> 00:33:28,971 They followed in order... 410 00:33:29,641 --> 00:33:31,101 Mayor with tricolor sash... 411 00:33:32,721 --> 00:33:34,171 Minister of Merchant Marine... 412 00:33:36,511 --> 00:33:40,751 Baroness Filiguelli Bonchamp, 102, lifetime company mascot... 413 00:33:40,755 --> 00:33:45,441 All authorities were quietly thrown aside. 414 00:33:48,571 --> 00:33:53,091 When the reserve of champagne terminated, it was decided to change the ritual of the ceremony. 415 00:33:55,471 --> 00:33:59,461 Cut of a metal wire that would trigger ... 416 00:33:59,471 --> 00:34:00,871 the mechanism of the baptism. 417 00:34:01,051 --> 00:34:05,861 Re-starts from 76 meters away la Serbelloni Mazzanti Viendalmare... 418 00:34:06,751 --> 00:34:08,301 419 00:34:09,311 --> 00:34:13,011 I cut, in the name of God! 420 00:34:14,181 --> 00:34:17,211 full Archbishop's littlefinger with pastoral ring! 421 00:34:17,631 --> 00:34:20,041 Damn sow, daughter of a great ...! 422 00:34:28,631 --> 00:34:35,211 The ship was christened at nightfall once appeased the cardinal's homicidal rage. 423 00:34:37,381 --> 00:34:41,763 At night the festivities continued with a big party at the house on the hill, 424 00:34:41,764 --> 00:34:44,345 belonging to Counts Serbelloni Mazzanti Viendalmare. 425 00:34:44,541 --> 00:34:47,554 Who, besides inviting the usual and powerful princes, 426 00:34:47,555 --> 00:34:50,105 extended the invitation the rest of the employees, 427 00:34:50,106 --> 00:34:54,643 even the most humble, given the upcoming union agreements. 428 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:58,774 This is a real Brandeburg dog, Archduchess, look. 429 00:34:58,851 --> 00:35:01,231 But he scares me a bit. 430 00:35:03,951 --> 00:35:08,931 Fantozzi and Filini arrived with two terrible fracs they hired. 431 00:35:09,032 --> 00:35:13,801 Filini looked like a mutilated... Fantozzi was virtually in bermudas! 432 00:35:17,831 --> 00:35:19,651 What's that? A calf? 433 00:35:19,754 --> 00:35:21,621 No, no, no! It's a horse! 434 00:35:22,222 --> 00:35:25,072 - I think it's a... puppy. - A dog...? 435 00:35:25,273 --> 00:35:27,845 A big puppy. a 2 tons puppy. 436 00:35:29,671 --> 00:35:33,793 - He's looking at us. He has a human stare. - Yes? 437 00:35:34,021 --> 00:35:35,201 You see? He purrs... 438 00:35:36,581 --> 00:35:37,681 Pardon... 439 00:35:38,501 --> 00:35:41,306 Sorry Doctor, but we our invitation cards. 440 00:35:41,341 --> 00:35:44,551 If you're kind enough to move that leg, we'd go to the party. Thank you. 441 00:35:56,441 --> 00:35:59,470 Filini and Fantozzi, What happened to them, I did not see them around. 442 00:35:59,771 --> 00:36:01,321 Maybe they were not invited. 443 00:36:01,422 --> 00:36:03,690 You're wrong, we invited everybody. 444 00:36:03,691 --> 00:36:08,134 - Yes? - Even the errand boys, everyone. 445 00:36:08,135 --> 00:36:09,699 - Well, well. - Why, is someone missing? 446 00:36:09,700 --> 00:36:14,238 Two rude ones, Countess. Two they think it's chic to be late. 447 00:36:14,339 --> 00:36:17,231 - But do not worry, countess. - Yes, I worry ... 448 00:36:17,532 --> 00:36:21,041 There are two beloved employees whose whereabouts are unknown! 449 00:36:21,331 --> 00:36:23,251 - Help us! - Horrible dog, help! 450 00:36:23,861 --> 00:36:27,631 - Help! - Contessa, help! 451 00:36:28,901 --> 00:36:30,481 What are you doing, watch out! 452 00:36:30,861 --> 00:36:32,671 A human stare, wasn't it? 453 00:36:33,091 --> 00:36:34,861 Purring, wasn't it? 454 00:36:36,271 --> 00:36:37,561 I admit that I was wrong. 455 00:36:37,701 --> 00:36:38,611 Quiet, "Fido"! 456 00:36:39,321 --> 00:36:40,771 Try with "Fufi"! 457 00:36:41,061 --> 00:36:42,071 Quiet, "Fufi"! 458 00:36:42,781 --> 00:36:43,861 Try "Bobi"! 459 00:36:43,862 --> 00:36:44,811 Quiet "Bobi"! 460 00:36:46,731 --> 00:36:47,324 Friedman! 461 00:36:47,525 --> 00:36:49,381 Friedman is not a dog's name! 462 00:36:49,801 --> 00:36:51,041 How on earth is called? 463 00:36:51,231 --> 00:36:54,401 His name was Ivan the Terrible the thirty-second. 464 00:36:54,502 --> 00:36:57,071 Direct descendant of Ivan the terrible the first. 465 00:36:57,072 --> 00:36:58,931 Who belonged to Czar Nicholas I. 466 00:36:59,041 --> 00:37:01,844 Legendary champion of hunting of Russian peasants in the steppes ... 467 00:37:01,845 --> 00:37:07,011 and executed as an enemy of the people, in the October Revolution in the Red Square. 468 00:37:07,331 --> 00:37:09,646 Now come on. Here we are coming! Slowly, carefully ... 469 00:37:09,647 --> 00:37:12,431 - Do not fret, dear ... - Here we are! 470 00:37:13,951 --> 00:37:16,761 - No, I'll bring the stairs. - Do not make efforts, please. 471 00:37:20,401 --> 00:37:22,061 I'm sorry, employee! 472 00:37:24,081 --> 00:37:26,291 Forgive me employee! Are you hurt? 473 00:37:26,771 --> 00:37:30,431 It's nothing. Only a complicated skull fracture. 474 00:37:31,341 --> 00:37:34,021 To make up for the unfortunate accident... 475 00:37:34,222 --> 00:37:37,338 Counts Serbelonni, with an astute patronal move... 476 00:37:37,439 --> 00:37:40,645 invited Fantozzi and Filini to the table of honour. 477 00:37:40,746 --> 00:37:42,219 - Bring it there. - Employee! 478 00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:44,049 - Fantozzi. - Employee! 479 00:37:44,541 --> 00:37:47,936 Allow me to introduce some of our friends: 480 00:37:48,837 --> 00:37:52,271 Excellency, His Eminence Vetanza. 481 00:37:52,781 --> 00:37:55,525 - Do�a Mi�az de Coral... - Sorry... 482 00:37:55,626 --> 00:37:57,361 my hand is slightly sweatty. 483 00:37:57,363 --> 00:38:01,101 General of Aviation Ernesto Maria Lampioni. 484 00:38:02,140 --> 00:38:04,641 Young Marchesa Giava delle Corte. 485 00:38:07,251 --> 00:38:09,961 You know the rules, Fantozzi ...! 486 00:38:09,981 --> 00:38:13,530 You do know how to behave in high society, don't you? 487 00:38:13,571 --> 00:38:15,921 What you must do and must not do... 488 00:38:16,411 --> 00:38:19,313 - yes, yes! - We'll see! 489 00:38:19,314 --> 00:38:22,501 Why, "we'll see"? My hand was only a bit sweatty, sorry. 490 00:38:37,991 --> 00:38:39,971 - Your shoes. - Thanks, should be exquisi ... 491 00:38:43,121 --> 00:38:46,321 The cocker had taken them, the puppy... 492 00:39:13,591 --> 00:39:17,951 Employee! Do you knows our Ambassador in Germany? 493 00:39:18,781 --> 00:39:22,691 Count Otto von Liujbert Steigner. 494 00:39:22,981 --> 00:39:24,551 Heil Hitler! Forgive me... 495 00:39:24,771 --> 00:39:26,421 Just call me Otto (Eight). 496 00:39:26,422 --> 00:39:27,438 No, no, at least Nine... 497 00:39:28,039 --> 00:39:29,937 - Ten! - Eleven! - Twelve! 498 00:39:30,138 --> 00:39:31,730 Fantozzi won. 499 00:39:31,831 --> 00:39:32,651 �Thirtynine, take this! 500 00:39:40,122 --> 00:39:43,430 How good! Exquisit! 501 00:39:48,671 --> 00:39:54,671 The glasses: 5 in a line on his right and another 5 in line on his left. 502 00:39:54,972 --> 00:39:56,697 What would you drink? 503 00:39:56,898 --> 00:39:58,223 Aren't you thirsty? 504 00:39:58,425 --> 00:40:01,190 My saliva levels are down to zero... 505 00:40:01,191 --> 00:40:02,171 then drink! 506 00:40:09,731 --> 00:40:10,571 What are you doing? 507 00:40:11,921 --> 00:40:13,761 I read... I read my hand... 508 00:40:14,061 --> 00:40:17,001 See? The line of luck ... 509 00:40:25,241 --> 00:40:26,306 What day is today? 510 00:40:26,507 --> 00:40:30,422 - Sunday! - Sunday! - They said the same thing at the same time! 511 00:40:30,457 --> 00:40:32,453 Let's do "flic-flac", Give me your little finger! 512 00:40:33,755 --> 00:40:36,620 Ring finger... Middle... 513 00:40:42,101 --> 00:40:45,791 The Thrush, the most difficult thing in nature! 514 00:41:21,229 --> 00:41:22,335 Cheers! 515 00:41:37,791 --> 00:41:40,501 - Have you finished it? - Yes, I ate it. 516 00:41:47,621 --> 00:41:48,896 How am I doing? 517 00:41:48,931 --> 00:41:50,301 bad, by God! 518 00:42:02,401 --> 00:42:06,111 At the end, he took a drastic decision, he swallowed it whole. 519 00:42:19,518 --> 00:42:21,054 So good! 520 00:42:25,761 --> 00:42:30,973 Fantozzi's colors: red, Pompeian red, orange lobster, 521 00:42:31,574 --> 00:42:35,891 violet, dull purple, dark blue, 522 00:42:36,521 --> 00:42:40,281 at dark blue, Fantozzi entered a cardio respiratory arrest. 523 00:42:44,611 --> 00:42:47,701 Rice from the oven with cherry tomatoes garniture. 524 00:42:48,001 --> 00:42:51,184 The tomatoes have this tragic feature: 525 00:42:51,485 --> 00:42:56,551 outside: cold, inside ... Fireball at 18,000 degrees! 526 00:42:56,731 --> 00:42:59,841 I'm going to get this one! 527 00:43:09,301 --> 00:43:10,851 You're not going to spit it here, I hope? 528 00:43:11,161 --> 00:43:12,321 No, no... 529 00:43:15,821 --> 00:43:19,861 You will not spit here? You're not going to do that, Fantozzi! Get out! 530 00:43:24,131 --> 00:43:26,214 Fantozzi! Maybe you know ... 531 00:43:26,415 --> 00:43:29,341 What was the name of that temp with that boiled fish face? 532 00:44:19,151 --> 00:44:20, Little tomatoes... 533 00:44:24,521 --> 00:44:25,681 - Fantozzi! - S�? 534 00:44:25,741 --> 00:44:27,401 Open your mouth and close your eyes. 535 00:44:35,250 --> 00:44:38,036 - Fantozzi! 536 00:44:40,471 --> 00:44:43,821 he had falled right into the arms of Iv�n the terrible... 537 00:44:44,131 --> 00:44:47,019 who after dragging him to the darkest corner of the park, 538 00:44:47,020 --> 00:44:51,862 began to dig a sinister looking grave, 1.30 for 2. 539 00:45:32,461 --> 00:45:33,491 And go, then! 540 00:45:37,591 --> 00:45:40,511 It was not the lights of a car that wanted to pass, 541 00:45:53,561 --> 00:45:56,026 The beast kept him besieged for a week, 542 00:45:56,327 --> 00:45:59,956 that was obviously counted as vacation. 543 00:46:01,741 --> 00:46:04,961 Ugo? Is it hot enough? 544 00:46:07,921 --> 00:46:11,023 An injustice that Fantozzi could not stand ... 545 00:46:11,024 --> 00:46:13,166 so that for the first time in his life, 546 00:46:13,167 --> 00:46:16,005 He faked being sick, and stayed home. 547 00:46:20,060 --> 00:46:21,021 The control! 548 00:46:25,894 --> 00:46:29,001 Wait. Do not open! Do not open! 549 00:46:40,961 --> 00:46:44,231 It wasn't the doctor, it was Mr. Bonetti from the 7th floor! 550 00:46:45,451 --> 00:46:47,011 What happened to the Virgin Mary? 551 00:46:49,971 --> 00:46:52,755 Bonetti? And what the hell did he want, 552 00:46:52,756 --> 00:46:54,805 Bonetti from the 7th floor? To give me a heart attack? 553 00:46:55,061 --> 00:46:58,384 No. He has to leave unexpectedly with his family ... 554 00:46:58,485 --> 00:47:01,001 What do I care about this? 555 00:47:01,191 --> 00:47:04,991 He had three free tickets for the American Circus ... 556 00:47:05,281 --> 00:47:07,741 he kindly gave them to us. 557 00:47:08,391 --> 00:47:09,151 Free... 558 00:47:09,941 --> 00:47:11,893 He could not sleep all night 559 00:47:12,194 --> 00:47:13,511 The risk was insane! 560 00:47:13,912 --> 00:47:16,214 If you were discovered you would risk at least... 561 00:47:16,215 --> 00:47:18,215 a public whipping in the cantine. 562 00:47:18,431 --> 00:47:22,881 But it was the first time in his life that Fantozzi had free tickets. 563 00:47:23,571 --> 00:47:25,446 - What happens? - I've decided. 564 00:47:25,747 --> 00:47:27,775 - We'll go. - Where? - To the circus. 565 00:47:28,861 --> 00:47:30,541 - We'll be careful... - Oh, My God... 566 00:47:30,621 --> 00:47:31,411 ...But we will go. 567 00:47:46,031 --> 00:47:47,441 - Ugo, is that you? - S�. 568 00:47:49,431 --> 00:47:50,437 - It's dad! 569 00:47:50,738 --> 00:47:51,961 Put the scarf back! 570 00:47:52,591 --> 00:47:54,271 Let's go. 571 00:48:25,501 --> 00:48:28,441 The tickets! Oh God! 572 00:48:29,821 --> 00:48:31,531 Oh, here they are! That's better! 573 00:48:31,611 --> 00:48:32,761 Come, Mari�ngela. 574 00:48:36,468 --> 00:48:40,930 And now, ladies and gentlemen, our intelligent chimps! 575 00:48:42,571 --> 00:48:44,021 Don't make me pull you, dear... 576 00:48:44,331 --> 00:48:46,611 Dad, I'm here! 577 00:48:48,821 --> 00:48:55,500 Hello, miss. You see... Ah, it's because you have the same dress... 578 00:48:55,510 --> 00:48:57,849 It was a misunderstanding. keep up the good work. 579 00:48:58,550 --> 00:48:59,871 "Come on, darling". 580 00:49:02,001 --> 00:49:03,791 Come, Chita... Eh, Mariangela. 581 00:49:07,991 --> 00:49:10,501 Did you see Pina, how cute was that monkey? 582 00:49:11,311 --> 00:49:14,762 You seem Mariangela, that monkeys are superior animals... 583 00:49:14,765 --> 00:49:20,970 excuse me... Aren't you the one who was supposed to be in bed, sick? 584 00:49:21,201 --> 00:49:23,781 Me? No, you're making a mistake! 585 00:49:24,581 --> 00:49:27,881 And now comes into play... 586 00:49:27,916 --> 00:49:30,400 the great Hungarian artist! 587 00:49:30,672 --> 00:49:32,977 - Take this! - What are you doing here? 588 00:49:33,980 --> 00:49:34,984 Take this! 589 00:49:46,341 --> 00:49:47,431 Go get it immediately! 590 00:49:49,321 --> 00:49:50,431 591 00:49:50,971 --> 00:49:52,980 Look at this clown! 592 00:49:53,638 --> 00:49:55,701 Take this, why not? 593 00:49:56,802 --> 00:50:00,397 Gentlemen, our Bronco "Wild Horse". 594 00:50:30,801 --> 00:50:33,001 Greetings, thank you very much! 595 00:50:43,281 --> 00:50:46,011 Accountant Ugo Fantozzi, 7829/bis tuition ... 596 00:50:46,401 --> 00:50:50,781 Consider my situation. Hold me tight! 597 00:50:55,621 --> 00:50:56,821 - Ugo! - Pap�! 598 00:50:57,441 --> 00:51:00,621 So you are Accountat Fantozzi! 599 00:51:00,861 --> 00:51:03,801 - No, I insist! 600 00:51:04,451 --> 00:51:05,541 it's not me! 601 00:51:12,671 --> 00:51:16,241 And now ladies and gentlemen, the most sensational number! 602 00:51:17,471 --> 00:51:20,561 Mr. Superflight. The bullet man! 603 00:51:23,931 --> 00:51:25,291 Stop! Quiet everybody! 604 00:51:25,961 --> 00:51:28,151 Accountant Fantozzi! 605 00:51:28,671 --> 00:51:30,211 Come out! 606 00:51:31,991 --> 00:51:37,341 I know you're in there! Come out I tell you! 607 00:51:39,241 --> 00:51:39,921 Oh, is that so? 608 00:51:40,122 --> 00:51:41,171 Then I'll take care of you! 609 00:51:52,471 --> 00:51:56,171 He was found a few days later in the province of Agrigento ... 610 00:51:56,331 --> 00:51:58,141 by the Archangel Michael. 611 00:52:00,821 --> 00:52:04,766 The divine messenger, reminded him that he was 9 months, 612 00:52:04,831 --> 00:52:08,661 and recommended to delve into the delivery room. 613 00:52:09,551 --> 00:52:12,791 Sorry Doctor, Hadn't we agreed in Bethlehem? 614 00:52:14,396 --> 00:52:16,453 Well, if you say so. Okay. 615 00:52:42,741 --> 00:52:46,460 "Battleship KOTIOMKIN" 616 00:52:50,831 --> 00:52:53,831 Many years ago, Fantozzi was hired by the company ... 617 00:52:54,211 --> 00:52:57,381 with the position of "Sponge for stamps." 618 00:53:02,361 --> 00:53:05,521 He succeeded because, in the aptitude test ... 619 00:53:05,891 --> 00:53:08,305 following the advice of a corrupt chief porter, 620 00:53:08,607 --> 00:53:13,251 responding to two strange questions from the chairman of the committee 621 00:53:18,821 --> 00:53:20,821 Do you like the German Expressionist film? 622 00:53:22,271 --> 00:53:23,611 It is the love of my life. 623 00:53:23,891 --> 00:53:26,731 And I want to remind here the great teachers: Murnau ... 624 00:53:26,981 --> 00:53:28,271 and Robert Wiene, 625 00:53:28,371 --> 00:53:32,743 from whom we cannot forget "Das kabinett... 626 00:53:32,744 --> 00:53:35,031 des Doktor Caligarisss". 627 00:53:35,391 --> 00:53:36,941 Caligari! 628 00:53:38,851 --> 00:53:41,971 Who is David Yourrrrrgryft? 629 00:53:46,600 --> 00:53:47,681 I did not hear... 630 00:53:48,282 --> 00:53:52,755 - Gryft! - Griffith! the father of American cinema! 631 00:53:52,756 --> 00:53:55,451 - Yes, him! - I adore him, he is like a father to me. 632 00:53:55,821 --> 00:53:59,220 Well, young man. You are one of us! 633 00:54:02,691 --> 00:54:05,911 The powerful Professor Maria Ricardelli Guidobaldo, 634 00:54:06,071 --> 00:54:08,801 was a fanatic worshiper of art cinema. 635 00:54:09,301 --> 00:54:13,121 Once a week he would force his employees and their families... 636 00:54:13,551 --> 00:54:16,181 to terrifying visions of cinema classics. 637 00:54:16,671 --> 00:54:19,730 In 20 years Fantozzi had to watch, again and again, 638 00:54:19,801 --> 00:54:23,624 "Dies Irae", from Carl Theodor Dreyer. Six hours. 639 00:54:23,930 --> 00:54:27,101 "Men of Aran," Flaherty. Nine parts. 640 00:54:27,401 --> 00:54:30,170 But above all, the most classic of classics ... 641 00:54:30,173 --> 00:54:33,432 ..."Battleship Kotiomkin"!. 18 rolls. 642 00:54:33,854 --> 00:54:39,031 Of which Professor Ricardelli, possessed a rare personal copy. 643 00:54:39,971 --> 00:54:41,681 Excuse me. What do they show tonight? 644 00:54:41,891 --> 00:54:44,661 - "Battleship Kotiomkin". - "Battle... ". 645 00:54:46,251 --> 00:54:49,561 - Go, go! 646 00:54:49,562 --> 00:54:50,564 - Battleship... "! - Ughino... Be brave. 647 00:56:23,531 --> 00:56:25,111 Excuse me... 648 00:56:26,581 --> 00:56:30,523 - �Ugo! Wake up! - I caught you, "Fantocci"! You sleep! 649 00:56:30,524 --> 00:56:33,812 �No Professor, It was a sudden spell of sickness! 650 00:56:33,921 --> 00:56:35,981 No madam. He sleeps like a piece of shit. 651 00:56:36,651 --> 00:56:39,986 - Wake up!. - It's already 7:00? Alarm clock! 652 00:56:39,987 --> 00:56:42,239 - Coffee, newspaper, bus! - Ugo! 653 00:56:42,551 --> 00:56:44,681 Good morning, Professor. Has the film already ended? 654 00:56:44,701 --> 00:56:47,282 - No, but you'd like that, you piece of shit? - No, no, no. 655 00:56:47,284 --> 00:56:48,891 There are still 3 parts. 656 00:56:48,926 --> 00:56:50,651 Great! 3 parts... 657 00:56:50,671 --> 00:56:52,191 And you will see them on your knees. 658 00:56:52,381 --> 00:56:54,101 Kneeling is better ... 659 00:56:54,102 --> 00:56:59,601 - On your knees ... - Not here. Come, follow me! 660 00:57:02,271 --> 00:57:05,401 It's a piece of shit. That's the right word ... 661 00:57:07,391 --> 00:57:08,641 Here!On the chickpeas! 662 00:57:09,431 --> 00:57:11,471 Let's see if you sleep well here. 663 00:57:11,861 --> 00:57:15,261 For more than 20 years suffered Fantozzi horrible public humiliation... 664 00:57:15,551 --> 00:57:17,291 during and after the screenings, 665 00:57:17,711 --> 00:57:20,801 when Ricardelli would open a discussion about the film. 666 00:57:22,031 --> 00:57:26,171 And now, as always, I invite you to express your aesthetic judgment. 667 00:57:26,941 --> 00:57:28,261 It's a great film! 668 00:57:29,300 --> 00:57:31,311 - I demand a word in! - You ... 669 00:57:31,581 --> 00:57:33,938 - Is a masterpiece. - The eye of the mother, 670 00:57:33,939 --> 00:57:36,754 - ... the stroller with the baby! - You, Filini ... 671 00:57:37,101 --> 00:57:40,331 When I see the detail of the boots, I fall into ecstasy. 672 00:57:40,511 --> 00:57:41,391 Say. 673 00:57:41,501 --> 00:57:45,881 Tonight the analog montage moved me completely! 674 00:57:46,971 --> 00:57:49,301 The boots of the soldiers and above all, the stroller! 675 00:57:49,661 --> 00:57:51,811 Yes, it's true. Say. 676 00:57:52,151 --> 00:57:56,124 The poor baby stroller that rushes down the stairs. 677 00:57:56,125 --> 00:57:58,521 Professor, couldn't we watch it again from the beginning? 678 00:57:59,101 --> 00:58:00,981 I wish, dear friend. But it's late. 679 00:58:04,011 --> 00:58:07,203 And you, "Fantocci"! Do you open your mouth only to yawn? 680 00:58:07,804 --> 00:58:08,880 �No tiene nada que decir? 681 00:58:09,111 --> 00:58:10,251 ...Nothing to say? 682 00:58:11,561 --> 00:58:15,941 My husband, the Accountant Fantozzi, is awestruck. 683 00:58:16,161 --> 00:58:19,741 No ma'am "Fantocci" Your husband is a piece of shit. 684 00:58:20,001 --> 00:58:21,301 Is it true or not? 685 00:58:29,261 --> 00:58:33,251 On Saturday the 18th, at 20:25 pm, Live from Wembley stadium, 686 00:58:33,471 --> 00:58:36,421 England-Italy, qualification for the World Cup. 687 00:58:36,961 --> 00:58:39,511 Fantozzi had a wonderful program! 688 00:58:39,701 --> 00:58:44,351 Socks, underwear, flannel robe, table watching television ... 689 00:58:44,352 --> 00:58:46,687 his favourite, omelette with onions, 690 00:58:46,688 --> 00:58:49,575 large beer cold, demoniac breath ... 691 00:58:49,576 --> 00:58:51,035 and free burping! 692 00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:55,744 "We are now connecting to Wembley to broadcast on Eurovision "... 693 00:58:55,745 --> 00:58:58,092 "the live broadcast of the match" ... 694 00:58:58,093 --> 00:59:00,991 "Italy-England, valid for the World Cup. " 695 00:59:03,500 --> 00:59:08,791 Ugo, look, Doesn't she look as an angel? 696 00:59:09,941 --> 00:59:13,625 Yeah, fine. Look, don't boter me, I don't want to hear a fly. 697 00:59:13,626 --> 00:59:15,741 Pina, pepper, pepper! 698 00:59:16,341 --> 00:59:19,291 And, Pina, don't forget to disconnect... 699 00:59:19,541 --> 00:59:25,540 "In a moment we'll switch to Wembley to broadcast on Eurovision "... 700 00:59:25,541 --> 00:59:28,321 "Italia-Inghilterra, valid for the world cup". 701 00:59:31,751 --> 00:59:33,491 Oh, it's you Accountant Filini! 702 00:59:33,492 --> 00:59:36,461 Aha, Filini! I'm already in the trenches! 703 00:59:36,462 --> 00:59:40,970 I bet we win, 10 coffees to 1. Italy, Italy! 704 00:59:40,981 --> 00:59:41,911 Did you hear? 705 00:59:43,931 --> 00:59:44,941 What? 706 00:59:46,341 --> 00:59:49,976 Fine, Accountant. We obey. 707 00:59:50,011 --> 00:59:52,871 "Dear viewers, we are at Wembley ... " 708 00:59:52,901 --> 00:59:54,756 Italia, Italia! 709 00:59:54,757 --> 00:59:58,176 "Teams are placed in the field to sing the national anthems. " 710 01:00:01,691 --> 01:00:06,061 Ugo! I think you can not watch the game tonight. 711 01:00:06,096 --> 01:00:07,181 What!? 712 01:00:07,451 --> 01:00:09,011 - We gotta get out ... - What... 713 01:00:09,401 --> 01:00:10,851 Professor Ricardelli. 714 01:00:10,981 --> 01:00:11,441 No! 715 01:00:11,501 --> 01:00:17,561 Filini to me we have to go immediately to see a Checoslovak film. 716 01:00:18,471 --> 01:00:20,241 But with German subtitles! 717 01:00:20,341 --> 01:00:22,511 - No! - Ugo! - Dad... 718 01:00:23,151 --> 01:00:24,521 Ughino, don't be like that! 719 01:00:25,711 --> 01:00:30,213 "We reached the big time. Italy-England are played in this historic match"... 720 01:00:30,214 --> 01:00:32,528 "qualification for the finals World Cup. " 721 01:00:33,161 --> 01:00:36,161 "Inquiry of timers. The referee blows" ... 722 01:00:36,196 --> 01:00:36,981 The match has begun! 723 01:00:39,121 --> 01:00:44,476 "Capelli Pass to Purici. To Antonioni. Tunnel to the English defender ". 724 01:00:44,477 --> 01:00:47,246 - "Another tunnel. heel for Roccia". - Ugo, we are running late. 725 01:00:48,175 --> 01:00:51,179 "Center, miracolous intervention of the English porter. 726 01:00:51,684 --> 01:00:54,759 "Take from the bottom. Controls Benetti Purici happens to the left ". 727 01:00:55,160 --> 01:00:58,392 "Formidable cannon of Purici that clears the crossbar. " 728 01:00:58,393 --> 01:01:03,015 "The ball is controlled by Bellugi. Bellugi for Capello now as right wing. 729 01:01:03,016 --> 01:01:06,815 "Elude the McKinley center trying to stop it. 730 01:01:06,817 --> 01:01:09,899 "Shoots, nape of English, Capello quill again neck, "... ... 731 01:01:09,900 --> 01:01:13,228 "terrible confusion, nose, neck, shin, neck, ear "... 732 01:01:13,229 --> 01:01:15,210 "enters Purici, Almost goes off target ". 733 01:01:16,211 --> 01:01:19,966 "Sorry for the excitement, friends who are facing the screen "... 734 01:01:20,112 --> 01:01:24,240 "but I haven't seen such a good start of the Azzurri since 170 years. 735 01:01:24,241 --> 01:01:28,771 "The ball is by Tardelli, speeding. McKinley eludes stop trying "... 736 01:01:30,172 --> 01:01:33,790 "Shoot. Nape of McKinley, Savoldi leg, nose of Antognoni ". 737 01:01:33,791 --> 01:01:37,287 "Nape of English goalkeeper, nose McKinley, Benetti leg, neck "... 738 01:01:43,341 --> 01:01:45,781 - Adjust it!! - There you go! 739 01:01:46,251 --> 01:01:48,341 - Ughino, calm down please... - I couldn't hear... 740 01:01:58,651 --> 01:01:59,558 "Fabulous strike!"... 741 01:01:59,559 --> 01:02:01,459 �Pole!Pole! 742 01:02:05,281 --> 01:02:08,161 - Ugo where are you going? - Will you come back, dad? 743 01:02:08,262 --> 01:02:11,042 "The Azzurri tear in again. They approach the English area. " 744 01:02:11,043 --> 01:02:15,514 "Azzurri attack. Antognoni jump almost hangs on the back to McKinley. " 745 01:02:17,281 --> 01:02:18,771 Excuse me. Who hit the pole? 746 01:02:20,210 --> 01:02:21,321 "strike from McKinley," 747 01:02:21,631 --> 01:02:24,450 "Terrible fall of the English goalkeeper". 748 01:02:25,151 --> 01:02:27,756 "The 120,000 spectators at Wembley and you, the lucky million "... " 749 01:02:27,757 --> 01:02:30,610 "that nothing could tear away from the front of the screen "... 750 01:02:31,011 --> 01:02:34,990 "may notice that tonight's Italy dwarfs the memory "... 751 01:02:34,991 --> 01:02:38,341 "of that legendary extra time of Italy, Germany, Mexico " 752 01:02:45,901 --> 01:02:47,291 Nothing? 753 01:02:49,331 --> 01:02:50,031 The tie? 754 01:02:54,691 --> 01:02:58,416 Pocket ... Perfect! 755 01:03:00,281 --> 01:03:02,251 Okay, go ahead! 756 01:03:03,181 --> 01:03:04,211 The mouth ... 757 01:03:06,941 --> 01:03:09,121 Pregnant? 9 inches? ... Congratulations. 758 01:03:09,481 --> 01:03:10,731 Did you see? What an embarassment. 759 01:03:35,461 --> 01:03:39,691 With great sadness I must inform you that by an oversight ... 760 01:03:40,461 --> 01:03:43,701 the copy of the Czechoslovak film did not arrive on time. 761 01:03:44,561 --> 01:03:46,891 Therefore we cannot make the projection. 762 01:03:47,051 --> 01:03:48,571 Let's go! 763 01:03:49,621 --> 01:03:50,911 Where are you going? Everybody freeze! 764 01:03:54,631 --> 01:04:00,511 Instead, there will be a screening of the Masterpiece of Serghei M. Einstein ... 765 01:04:00,941 --> 01:04:02,521 ... "Battleship Kotiomkin". 766 01:04:20,181 --> 01:04:24,891 Tonight I feel a more vibrant tension, they are more active, they exchange comments. 767 01:04:24,951 --> 01:04:26,741 yes, they partecipate more, Professor. 768 01:04:28,371 --> 01:04:31,398 they were not exchanging comments. In the darkness of the room... 769 01:04:31,399 --> 01:04:33,703 were running uncontrollable and implausible rumors. 770 01:04:34,031 --> 01:04:37,001 It was said that Italy won 20-0 ... 771 01:04:37,451 --> 01:04:41,301 and goalkeeper Zoff had made a header from a corner. 772 01:04:52,224 --> 01:04:54,137 Twentyone! 773 01:05:17,531 --> 01:05:20,671 Well, we opened our usual debate. 774 01:05:21,541 --> 01:05:22,661 Who want to speak? 775 01:05:24,511 --> 01:05:27,321 Filini? Calboni? 776 01:05:31,441 --> 01:05:34,811 Excuse me! Can I say something? 777 01:05:35,311 --> 01:05:36,991 Ah, our piece of shit! 778 01:05:37,471 --> 01:05:40,081 Come Fantocci! Please come. 779 01:05:40,421 --> 01:05:42,686 Finally you have an opinion. 780 01:05:43,221 --> 01:05:47,931 Who knows what deep aesthetic judgment you must have matured over the years? 781 01:05:48,534 --> 01:05:50,237 Talk, talk. 782 01:05:50,940 --> 01:05:51,742 Well? 783 01:05:52,431 --> 01:05:56,241 For me, "Battleship Kotiomkin" ... 784 01:05:57,781 --> 01:05:59,391 ...It's fucking shit! 785 01:06:13,041 --> 01:06:15,681 Ninety-two minutes of applause! 786 01:06:19,191 --> 01:06:21,731 Got it? Piece of shit! 787 01:06:34,781 --> 01:06:37,481 Burn! There you have soldiers' boots! 788 01:06:39,161 --> 01:06:41,298 The first thing was to destroy forever ... 789 01:06:41,299 --> 01:06:44,281 The damn personal copy of the damn "Battleship Kotiomkin." 790 01:06:45,401 --> 01:06:48,121 On the chickpeas! 791 01:06:51,361 --> 01:06:54,431 - Look! - Your "eye of the mother"! 792 01:06:54,634 --> 01:06:56,537 The baby stroller! 793 01:06:58,091 --> 01:06:59,951 There is your analog montage! 794 01:07:00,581 --> 01:07:01,921 �"Halt"! Just a moment! 795 01:07:02,331 --> 01:07:04,481 Now, the screenings! 796 01:07:08,041 --> 01:07:11,060 Guidobaldo Mar�a Riccardelli was forced to watch for 2 days... 797 01:07:11,061 --> 01:07:14,733 and 2 nights non stop, to see continuously rotating... 798 01:07:15,034 --> 01:07:19,091 "Giovannona long legs", "The Esorciccio" y "police are pissed off". 799 01:07:24,561 --> 01:07:26,531 - Want some coffee? - How about some coffee? 800 01:07:29,471 --> 01:07:31,011 Come on, right! Piece of shit. 801 01:07:31,381 --> 01:07:32,711 - Ughino, a coffee? - No, no. 802 01:07:33,711 --> 01:07:35,271 Bravo, my hero Fantozzi! 803 01:07:35,311 --> 01:07:39,989 Until the dawn of the third day, the police got pissed off for real. 804 01:07:43,691 --> 01:07:46,181 There's no escape! You are surrounded! 805 01:07:46,991 --> 01:07:47,931 Never! 806 01:07:49,731 --> 01:07:51,371 - Never! 807 01:07:52,851 --> 01:07:56,253 �Fantozzi, I am the Director of Directors! 808 01:07:56,254 --> 01:08:00,362 I advise you to release immediately the hostage... 809 01:08:00,363 --> 01:08:01,351 And to surrender unconditionally! 810 01:08:01,641 --> 01:08:03,861 We'll never surrender, did you hear me? 811 01:08:04,461 --> 01:08:06,431 Never! Bah, maybe... 812 01:08:07,601 --> 01:08:08,501 Stop it! 813 01:08:10,031 --> 01:08:12,231 To partly compensate Professor Ricardelli... 814 01:08:12,551 --> 01:08:16,066 of the irreparable loss of his beautiful film ... 815 01:08:16,067 --> 01:08:19,363 The mutineers were sentenced a horrendous punishment, 816 01:08:19,364 --> 01:08:20,745 worth of a Dantean circle of hell. 817 01:08:21,446 --> 01:08:25,990 They had to recreate atleast the main sequence of the masterpiece destroyed, 818 01:08:26,231 --> 01:08:30,461 every saturday afternoon, until they reached retirement ... 819 01:08:31,721 --> 01:08:32,971 We can begin! 820 01:08:47,971 --> 01:08:48,971 Die, Filini! 821 01:08:51,696 --> 01:08:53,720 - Bastards! - We will take revenge! 822 01:08:54,151 --> 01:08:55,291 Down boy! 823 01:08:58,761 --> 01:08:59,891 mother's eye! 824 01:09:11,751 --> 01:09:12,741 Soldiers open fire! 825 01:09:13,621 --> 01:09:15,124 Murderers! 826 01:09:15,125 --> 01:09:16,759 Now, the stroller! 827 01:09:16,851 --> 01:09:18,901 - Please, go slow... - S�, Accountant. 828 01:09:18,902 --> 01:09:20,551 Today it's already the 4th time! 829 01:09:26,550 --> 01:09:28,602 Oh, mam�! �Oh, mam�! Oh God! 830 01:09:35,721 --> 01:09:36,871 Bravo, "Fantocci"! 831 01:09:37,561 --> 01:09:40,641 You are so nicely chubby, Like an infant. 832 01:09:40,901 --> 01:09:43,411 Don't worry, nobody will take away this role from you. 833 01:09:43,921 --> 01:09:46,191 You have the "fisique du role". 834 01:09:46,451 --> 01:09:48,221 Now do another take. 835 01:09:48,651 --> 01:09:50,621 - Another?. - Yes, yes, another. 836 01:09:53,441 --> 01:09:54,711 - We do another one? - Yes.. 837 01:09:54,841 --> 01:09:56,971 Good, have you seen the analog montage? 838 01:09:57,051 --> 01:09:58,751 Almost better than the Master's one! 839 01:10:00,141 --> 01:10:02,701 Let's start again! Get back in your position! 840 01:10:17,901 --> 01:10:20,791 - Ugo! - Bye, Dad! 841 01:10:22,411 --> 01:10:26,060 A sad morning, Mrs. Pina and Mari�ngela, left ... 842 01:10:26,061 --> 01:10:30,025 to attend the funeral of a distant second cousin in Pescara. 843 01:10:31,641 --> 01:10:35,111 They left Fantozzi alone with his pain. 844 01:10:39,861 --> 01:10:42,549 After centuries of everyday family bondage ... 845 01:10:42,550 --> 01:10:46,160 He was free. And with a free house ... 846 01:10:46,367 --> 01:10:48,301 Calboni took advantage situation. 847 01:10:48,303 --> 01:10:51,334 and involved him in a shady affair... 848 01:10:51,371 --> 01:10:54,311 With that face, I bet you need to tell me something. 849 01:10:54,411 --> 01:10:57,734 Something unpleasant, but you lack the courage, right? 850 01:10:58,021 --> 01:10:59,681 - No... - S�. 851 01:11:00,181 --> 01:11:03,157 Could it be that the Engineer Masella Cominetti ... 852 01:11:03,158 --> 01:11:04,735 wants the balance for tomorrow morning ... 853 01:11:04,736 --> 01:11:08,459 and that you, me and Filini ... 854 01:11:08,460 --> 01:11:11,422 Must work all night at your house? 855 01:11:11,423 --> 01:11:13,631 - S�? - S�. 856 01:11:14,331 --> 01:11:16,381 I'm sorry. Just tonight, 857 01:11:16,382 --> 01:11:18,401 that I had invited my wife out for dinner ... 858 01:11:19,211 --> 01:11:21,291 Dont worry about it, maybe I can come too... 859 01:11:21,361 --> 01:11:22,811 To give you company. 860 01:11:22,891 --> 01:11:23,621 -Why Not? _Not! 861 01:11:26,191 --> 01:11:27,271 Oh, nevermind then. 862 01:11:27,611 --> 01:11:29,781 - Can I sit he... - No, it's busy. 863 01:11:31,541 --> 01:11:33,401 - and here? - No, also busy. 864 01:11:35,221 --> 01:11:39,535 - All busy... - Move on, go. further down there is plenty of room. 865 01:11:39,536 --> 01:11:41,851 Then I'll leave, ma'am ... Bon appetit ... 866 01:11:42,011 --> 01:11:43,011 Bye, Fantozzi. 867 01:11:50,611 --> 01:11:53,341 Then Vivi, what shall we do, are you busy?. Oh, Ok. 868 01:11:54,001 --> 01:11:57,138 The appointment was at 21:30 at the phone booth 869 01:11:57,139 --> 01:11:58,241 of Garibaldi Avenue. 870 01:11:58,641 --> 01:12:01,621 here Calboni made 126 phone calls... 871 01:12:01,711 --> 01:12:04,180 to an equal number of unknown people, 872 01:12:04,181 --> 01:12:06,781 describing them to us as actresses and models. 873 01:12:07,871 --> 01:12:10,851 Hi, Zizi. Oh, did you recognize me? 874 01:12:11,041 --> 01:12:13,671 Si, s�. I am with 2 friends. 875 01:12:15,221 --> 01:12:17,441 Let's say middle-aged. 876 01:12:17,681 --> 01:12:21,071 ne short and fat. The other is thin, but shortsighted. 877 01:12:21,351 --> 01:12:23,861 Double lenses. Type owl, do you know? 878 01:12:24,801 --> 01:12:27,031 What Ah, I see. 879 01:12:27,681 --> 01:12:30,751 All right. Ciao, Zizi! 880 01:12:31,521 --> 01:12:32,851 She's also is busy? 881 01:12:32,961 --> 01:12:35,381 No, they're all free... 882 01:12:35,481 --> 01:12:37,391 But when I start describing you, they make excuses. 883 01:12:37,611 --> 01:12:39,351 But if you, describes so ... 884 01:12:39,551 --> 01:12:41,021 "Owl type," he says!! 885 01:12:41,161 --> 01:12:43,321 But I cannot compromise my reputation! 886 01:12:43,356 --> 01:12:45,071 I cannot sell a dead. 887 01:12:45,431 --> 01:12:48,751 Calboni sorry, could you not be at least lighter with the next one? 888 01:12:48,752 --> 01:12:51,721 ...What next one? - What next, the last one was Zizi. 889 01:12:52,741 --> 01:12:56,241 - How, Zizi? - Watch out, disgraces can happen. 890 01:12:58,451 --> 01:12:59,201 Well? 891 01:13:03,271 --> 01:13:05,201 I finished my ones. And yours!? 892 01:13:05,251 --> 01:13:06,951 No, no, no, sorry... 893 01:13:08,401 --> 01:13:11,443 - El Contable Fantozzi was... - Oh God... 894 01:13:12,444 --> 01:13:14,351 - What's happening "puccettone? - "Lost...! I've lost them! 895 01:13:14,401 --> 01:13:18,031 Oh God! I've lost them! 896 01:13:18,432 --> 01:13:19,534 My savings... 897 01:13:20,641 --> 01:13:23,274 So we said: Accountant fantozzi put in the place, 898 01:13:23,275 --> 01:13:26,470 I brought the alcohol, the rest was up to you. 899 01:13:26,841 --> 01:13:29,191 Ok, just a moment. Let's see... 900 01:13:29,841 --> 01:13:32,451 Oh, what an idiot! Why did I not think about it earlier? 901 01:13:33,301 --> 01:13:35,241 - What? - The "Hippopotamus"! 902 01:13:35,621 --> 01:13:38,501 is it a girl who's... 903 01:13:39,091 --> 01:13:40,141 No, it's a club! 904 01:13:40,371 --> 01:13:44,731 it's full of nice lonely ladies, who go there looking for company... 905 01:13:44,831 --> 01:13:46,281 Let's go! Taxi! 906 01:13:46,321 --> 01:13:48,516 - Which are the first three? - Why three? 907 01:13:48,518 --> 01:13:50,828 One each, no? You live only once! 908 01:13:50,829 --> 01:13:51,754 Taxi! 909 01:13:57,771 --> 01:13:58,591 Hi, babe! 910 01:14:01,371 --> 01:14:03,121 bab... sorry, miss. 911 01:14:03,981 --> 01:14:06,091 - Is the action started? - we are the first in. 912 01:14:06,791 --> 01:14:11,171 She meant they were the first clients in 3 months. 913 01:14:12,091 --> 01:14:14,651 - People is coming! - C'mon girls, get ready! 914 01:14:25,631 --> 01:14:27,841 They are all high class, girls from the high bourgeoise. 915 01:14:27,981 --> 01:14:30,181 - Ah! - There's also some big name around. 916 01:14:30,241 --> 01:14:31,201 No, don't know them. 917 01:14:31,290 --> 01:14:34,351 But they are incognito. Club's rule. 918 01:14:34,741 --> 01:14:36,631 Here, no names, only telephone numbers. 919 01:14:37,731 --> 01:14:38,881 - Got it? - You choose and call ... 920 01:14:39,221 --> 01:14:40,431 A "drink", gentlemen? 921 01:14:42,071 --> 01:14:43,301 Do you want to drink? 922 01:14:44,891 --> 01:14:46,661 We brought a bottle... 923 01:14:48,161 --> 01:14:51,531 Don't be stupid! You bring the bottles from home? 924 01:14:52,161 --> 01:14:54,211 we'll take 3 "scotch", please. 925 01:14:55,401 --> 01:14:56,440 What do we drink, Calboni? 926 01:14:56,441 --> 01:14:57,444 Three "scotch". 927 01:14:57,645 --> 01:14:58,681 I meanwhile ... 928 01:14:58,781 --> 01:14:59,821 "Scotch"... 929 01:15:02,601 --> 01:15:03,241 Yes? 930 01:15:03,661 --> 01:15:07,481 Lady Ten, Will you grant an appointment, say ... 931 01:15:07,482 --> 01:15:11,481 on the dancefloor, say in 5 seconds? 932 01:15:11,511 --> 01:15:13,011 - Ok. - see you soon. 933 01:15:14,721 --> 01:15:17,491 You see? C'mon, try it yourselves. 934 01:15:19,901 --> 01:15:23,851 Thank you, Countess. Thank you, dear. So beautiful! 935 01:15:24,471 --> 01:15:26,471 So? Will you choose. 936 01:15:26,541 --> 01:15:27,911 - Me? - S�. 937 01:15:29,341 --> 01:15:33,001 Filini, n.3 is looking at us... 938 01:15:33,381 --> 01:15:36,071 N. 12! N. 7! 939 01:15:37,141 --> 01:15:38,311 N. 1 too! 940 01:15:39,871 --> 01:15:40,801 And n. 5! 941 01:15:41,501 --> 01:15:44,371 Accountant, they are all watching us. 942 01:15:44,511 --> 01:15:46,431 Accountant, say a number. 943 01:15:46,571 --> 01:15:47,806 - Me. - S�. 944 01:15:48,041 --> 01:15:49,770 Ah, ah, ah... 180! 945 01:15:49,971 --> 01:15:52,481 Too much, they're only 12! 946 01:15:54,531 --> 01:15:56,881 Eh, I like n.5... 947 01:15:57,051 --> 01:15:59,494 Damn, I like n. 5 too! 948 01:15:59,495 --> 01:16:01,931 - You can have her! - No, no, no, she's yours. 949 01:16:01,932 --> 01:16:04,111 No please! Go on. 950 01:16:07,600 --> 01:16:09,551 - Stay calm. - I've got sweatty hands. 951 01:16:09,911 --> 01:16:12,781 Here! I make the number. 952 01:16:15,211 --> 01:16:17,901 - Hello! - Hello, Who's there? 953 01:16:18,001 --> 01:16:20,456 - It's Olga, darling. - Oh, it's not the Cometti's house? 954 01:16:21,021 --> 01:16:22,941 Sorry, wrong number. 955 01:16:23,081 --> 01:16:25,381 - Your turn. - wrong number... 956 01:16:25,941 --> 01:16:27,131 You try now. 957 01:16:27,221 --> 01:16:28,651 Did you call me, darling? 958 01:16:29,531 --> 01:16:31,481 - Good morning. You called Mrs.?. - I truly ... 959 01:16:31,531 --> 01:16:35,161 So why did you call me? Do you mind if I sit? 960 01:16:35,721 --> 01:16:38,061 - Of course... - Do you mind if my friend also come? 961 01:16:39,931 --> 01:16:43,554 - Do you mind if I order champagne? - Waiter, take away this stuff. 962 01:16:43,555 --> 01:16:45,500 Out, out! Gar�on, champagne! 963 01:16:47,241 --> 01:16:49,022 They did everything one can do... 964 01:16:49,023 --> 01:16:50,886 To be robbed in a nightclub. 965 01:16:51,451 --> 01:16:54,277 Two boxes of Dom Perignon made with bicarbonate. 966 01:16:55,271 --> 01:16:56,611 What a good drink! 967 01:16:57,100 --> 01:16:59,014 Midnight flambe'dinner. 968 01:17:00,171 --> 01:17:01,261 I adore flames. 969 01:17:02,961 --> 01:17:04,875 Photos souvenir of the evening. 970 01:17:05,176 --> 01:17:07,411 Calboni ordered 40 copies. 971 01:17:08,561 --> 01:17:12,311 Enormous stuffed toys, as a present for the ladies. 972 01:17:14,301 --> 01:17:16,981 Gypsy Violins on the dancefloor. 973 01:17:17,800 --> 01:17:18,800 Miss, if only ... 974 01:17:19,900 --> 01:17:21,000 I had the chance ... 975 01:17:23,100 --> 01:17:24,300 To find... 976 01:17:25,700 --> 01:17:28,943 A person that can understand me, I could do anything... 977 01:17:29,781 --> 01:17:33,271 - how is it going with yours? - She's a bit tall... 978 01:17:33,941 --> 01:17:36,921 Better. I think they are ready to come by you. 979 01:17:36,922 --> 01:17:38,541 Do you think so? 980 01:17:40,191 --> 01:17:42,961 Bravo! Bravo! Thank you guys! 981 01:17:43,221 --> 01:17:44,861 Good night, let's go. 982 01:17:47,041 --> 01:17:48,601 - The bill, sir... - S�. 983 01:17:51,511 --> 01:17:52,901 Good, put everything on my account... 984 01:17:53,901 --> 01:17:54,641 What account? 985 01:17:55,981 --> 01:17:56,961 Well, send it to my place... 986 01:17:57,501 --> 01:17:58,691 What place? 987 01:17:59,911 --> 01:18:01,782 They will settle for now. We'll calculate later the shares. 988 01:18:01,783 --> 01:18:04,201 - In the meantime I talk to the girls. - Are you going to settle this? 989 01:18:05,871 --> 01:18:06,931 Ah, sorry. 990 01:18:15,981 --> 01:18:17,251 Excuse me... 991 01:18:22,038 --> 01:18:24,411 �649 thousand liras... 992 01:18:25,231 --> 01:18:27,431 Plus 18% service cost. 993 01:18:28,730 --> 01:18:31,581 Four years of sacrifices. 994 01:18:36,391 --> 01:18:41,491 In addition, finally Calboni dropped the mask about the "ladies". 995 01:18:42,831 --> 01:18:46,341 I arranged for 50,000 liras per girl. A good deal, right? 996 01:18:47,471 --> 01:18:49,251 Do you want money? 997 01:18:49,321 --> 01:18:52,161 Why? How much is left in the Box? 998 01:18:52,821 --> 01:18:55,761 With Filini's 8000 liras we have... 999 01:18:56,191 --> 01:18:59,641 - 52000 liras. - Damn! It's enough only for mine. 1000 01:18:59,751 --> 01:19:01,861 pok, give them here. my one wants her money in advance. 1001 01:19:03,881 --> 01:19:06,211 Sorry about that, they are 2 trashy good for nothing. 1002 01:19:06,391 --> 01:19:08,101 C'mon,Let's go. Taxi! 1003 01:19:08,681 --> 01:19:11,161 How do you call a taxi here? Taxi! 1004 01:19:11,661 --> 01:19:13,521 this time he ordered 9 taxi 1005 01:19:14,081 --> 01:19:16,511 In average, 2 and 1/4 per person. 1006 01:19:29,141 --> 01:19:30,580 - Calboni! - Settle the bill please, 1007 01:19:30,581 --> 01:19:33,340 ...We'll settle ourselves later. - But how? I haven't got anything... 1008 01:19:33,381 --> 01:19:34,971 Who's going to settle here? Calboni! 1009 01:19:35,121 --> 01:19:38,871 - I do not have a ... - Who is going to pay here? 1010 01:19:38,931 --> 01:19:40,211 Wait a minute. 1011 01:19:40,712 --> 01:19:41,651 Filini! 1012 01:19:41,671 --> 01:19:42,951 Say, Accountant! 1013 01:19:44,004 --> 01:19:46,434 - Please fix the bill! - Me? 1014 01:19:46,464 --> 01:19:50,164 - yeah, we'll settle between ourselves later. - What do I do? 1015 01:19:50,174 --> 01:19:53,200 Accountant Fantozzi, don't leave me like this! 1016 01:19:53,201 --> 01:19:56,104 Filini spent the rest of the night in first aid ... 1017 01:19:56,259 --> 01:19:58,766 At Our Immaculate Lady Hospital. 1018 01:20:05,084 --> 01:20:08,564 Fantozzi instead spent the night in the foyer of his home. 1019 01:20:18,254 --> 01:20:21,534 It's 7:00!. Pina, coffee, the newspaper, the mail! 1020 01:20:22,374 --> 01:20:24,524 Good morning, Ms. Silvani of Calboni ... 1021 01:20:24,724 --> 01:20:27,114 - What brings you h... - Where is my husband? 1022 01:20:31,344 --> 01:20:32,654 I haven't understood the question. 1023 01:20:32,684 --> 01:20:34,464 Where's that pig? 1024 01:20:34,844 --> 01:20:36,664 - Surveyor Calboni? - Exactly. 1025 01:20:37,344 --> 01:20:42,294 Surveyor Calboni has... taken a detour and went away. 1026 01:20:43,014 --> 01:20:46,164 How good And what were you doing lying here like a watchdog? 1027 01:20:46,594 --> 01:20:49,804 Oh, every Saturday it's my turn... 1028 01:20:49,984 --> 01:20:54,444 - Here in the condo, lots are drawn ... - Do not be a clown, Fantozzi! 1029 01:20:54,884 --> 01:20:56,554 You know very well he is with a woman! 1030 01:20:56,904 --> 01:21:01,104 And you are covering him! you pimp, scoundrel! 1031 01:21:01,264 --> 01:21:02,644 1032 01:21:02,874 --> 01:21:07,625 "Fantocci", don't be a clown, open this door! 1033 01:21:08,104 --> 01:21:09,764 ...I don't have the keys. 1034 01:21:10,354 --> 01:21:11,364 How, is this not your place? 1035 01:21:11,514 --> 01:21:15,224 This? No, this... eh... I... 1036 01:21:16,100 --> 01:21:18,404 He locked himself in. 1037 01:21:21,744 --> 01:21:23,684 - Pig! - You're a pig, Calboni! 1038 01:21:23,964 --> 01:21:26,694 You made her cry! Open! 1039 01:21:27,274 --> 01:21:28,834 ...made her cry. Pig! 1040 01:21:30,475 --> 01:21:31,954 - "Fantocci"... - Fantozzi... 1041 01:21:32,584 --> 01:21:33,704 - "Fantocci"... - "Fantocci"... 1042 01:21:33,884 --> 01:21:38,574 "Fantocci", be a man, and break that door down. 1043 01:21:40,984 --> 01:21:42,184 I break it down... 1044 01:21:46,304 --> 01:21:49,544 It did not work. I try again. 1045 01:21:52,404 --> 01:21:54,404 - What are you doing? - The door is new. 1046 01:21:54,624 --> 01:21:57,114 Push it properly. Let's go over there. 1047 01:21:57,294 --> 01:21:58,494 - Give it a good push. - S�. 1048 01:21:59,834 --> 01:22:03,621 Take career as a gazelle. Well, well. Attack as a battering ram. 1049 01:22:03,654 --> 01:22:04,734 Like this... 1050 01:22:07,654 --> 01:22:08,514 Banzai! 1051 01:22:09,664 --> 01:22:10,934 Yeah, I'm coming... 1052 01:22:18,374 --> 01:22:22,144 He had fallen squarely on bus n. 77 from 5:26 am... 1053 01:22:22,774 --> 01:22:25,864 Which brought him back home at 6:13, 1054 01:22:26,214 --> 01:22:29,444 after a tour of the city. 1055 01:22:38,524 --> 01:22:39,524 Pig! 1056 01:22:40,924 --> 01:22:42,234 Ah, it's you Fantozzi? 1057 01:22:42,754 --> 01:22:44,234 I thought that pig had come back. 1058 01:22:44,954 --> 01:22:47,204 Also, you come in like that, without warning... 1059 01:22:47,244 --> 01:22:49,204 Forgive me, I did not want to frighten you. 1060 01:22:49,764 --> 01:22:52,034 Why do you make that face? I did not kill you. 1061 01:22:52,114 --> 01:22:53,104 It was very light. 1062 01:22:53,174 --> 01:22:56,744 Yes, that's because it was a vase of "blown" glass from Murano, my wife's, very valuable. 1063 01:22:57,054 --> 01:22:59,464 But don't worry, we have 2 of them. 1064 01:22:59,854 --> 01:23:00,984 Ms Silvani de Calboni. 1065 01:23:01,394 --> 01:23:03,454 Don't call me like this, I don't want to hear his name! 1066 01:23:03,544 --> 01:23:05,169 I will not do that again, 1067 01:23:05,204 --> 01:23:07,104 But this is the last... 1068 01:23:07,294 --> 01:23:09,964 it's better I put it somewhere safe. Sorry, ms. 1069 01:23:12,754 --> 01:23:14,464 Fortunately it's safe... 1070 01:23:19,264 --> 01:23:20,494 So now can I call you again... 1071 01:23:20,914 --> 01:23:23,624 Miss Silvani... 1072 01:23:23,914 --> 01:23:24,784 like the good old times? 1073 01:23:25,294 --> 01:23:26,454 - Do you know what he did? - No. 1074 01:23:26,474 --> 01:23:28,804 Do you know? Not only he cheated on me. 1075 01:23:28,964 --> 01:23:30,654 But he fled like a coward, 1076 01:23:30,674 --> 01:23:32,004 And he left me there with that energumena. 1077 01:23:32,254 --> 01:23:33,394 Do you know what she did? 1078 01:23:33,684 --> 01:23:35,754 She broke the umbrella on my head! 1079 01:23:36,154 --> 01:23:38,504 I know, it was my wife's umbrella. The only. 1080 01:23:39,374 --> 01:23:41,344 But this has been the drop that broke the vase. 1081 01:23:41,434 --> 01:23:44,104 There are no more vases! Oh, I thought... 1082 01:23:44,184 --> 01:23:47,234 that you had a modern marriage, and happy. 1083 01:23:48,164 --> 01:23:49,644 It has been the biggest mistake of my life. 1084 01:23:51,844 --> 01:23:52,884 A tragedy! 1085 01:23:53,664 --> 01:23:55,484 - A fiasco! - Miss! 1086 01:23:56,490 --> 01:23:57,792 Miss! 1087 01:23:58,804 --> 01:23:59,754 what are you doing? 1088 01:24:01,184 --> 01:24:02,604 I... was kissing the hand. 1089 01:24:04,054 --> 01:24:06,557 Fortunately I' m still young, and beautiful, 1090 01:24:06,558 --> 01:24:07,624 to build my life again. 1091 01:24:07,704 --> 01:24:09,304 You are very beautiful. 1092 01:24:09,354 --> 01:24:11,684 Enough! You know what I' ll do? 1093 01:24:11,685 --> 01:24:14,344 - No. - I' m going to sleep at the hotel! 1094 01:24:14,424 --> 01:24:15,814 - Bravo! - You know what else? 1095 01:24:16,154 --> 01:24:19,434 I' ll leave my job, get my liquidation. And I will run away with the first one passing by. 1096 01:24:19,594 --> 01:24:21,264 what...Why...? 1097 01:24:21,334 --> 01:24:22,314 What are you saying? 1098 01:24:22,494 --> 01:24:24,254 Why with the first one passing by? 1099 01:24:25,114 --> 01:24:25,674 Miss... 1100 01:24:27,064 --> 01:24:28,794 I' m also tired of this life. 1101 01:24:29,354 --> 01:24:31,234 I can also take my liquidation. 1102 01:24:31,415 --> 01:24:34,224 I' m also young and pleasant enough... 1103 01:24:37,844 --> 01:24:40,234 Miss, I need only a word from you. 1104 01:24:40,584 --> 01:24:42,234 not even that, 1105 01:24:42,394 --> 01:24:44,144 because silence meas consent. 1106 01:24:44,434 --> 01:24:46,654 Miss, let me hug you! 1107 01:24:51,734 --> 01:24:55,574 This time was n. 102 that goes around the hills. 1108 01:24:55,664 --> 01:24:59,116 So Fantozzi had all the time to make a list... 1109 01:24:59,117 --> 01:25:01,790 of all possible solutions for their new life. 1110 01:25:02,196 --> 01:25:05,319 ""Croupier" in Casablanca, drummer in Harlem, 1111 01:25:05,320 --> 01:25:10,212 hippie in Nepal. At the end, he left the choice... 1112 01:25:10,504 --> 01:25:11,634 To his companion. 1113 01:25:12,394 --> 01:25:14,034 - let' s go to Capri. - What for? 1114 01:25:14,494 --> 01:25:15,654 As a honeymoon. 1115 01:25:16,924 --> 01:25:18,144 Then we'll see. 1116 01:25:20,314 --> 01:25:22,934 Accountant, what are you doing! Get a move! 1117 01:25:23,684 --> 01:25:26,456 It was the last card of his life. 1118 01:25:26,724 --> 01:25:31,010 Fantozzi, marked it with indifference. As always. 1119 01:25:40,814 --> 01:25:44,125 With the same style, trying not to show ... 1120 01:25:44,126 --> 01:25:48,314 Any emotion, he had the last meal with his family. 1121 01:26:01,224 --> 01:26:02,424 Well... 1122 01:26:04,224 --> 01:26:06,634 I' m going... 1123 01:26:06,724 --> 01:26:08,154 To buy cigarettes... 1124 01:26:12,924 --> 01:26:14,134 S�, Ugo. 1125 01:26:14,384 --> 01:26:15,754 No, don' t... 1126 01:26:20,054 --> 01:26:23,034 - Ill be back, Straight away. - S�. 1127 01:26:27,554 --> 01:26:29,424 Cigarettes? But dad does not smoke! 1128 01:26:31,204 --> 01:26:33,254 he has decided to try. 1129 01:26:33,734 --> 01:26:34,904 Hopefully he' ll stop soon... 1130 01:26:49,844 --> 01:26:52,554 Miss, imagine that in eleven hours ... 1131 01:26:52,955 --> 01:26:54,734 11 hours and 40 minutes, at the most, 1132 01:26:55,144 --> 01:26:56,784 We' ll be in Naples. 1133 01:26:57,714 --> 01:27:00,774 When I went there on honeymoon, It took only an hour and twenty ... 1134 01:27:01,274 --> 01:27:03,654 In a Mercedes Spider 2800. 1135 01:27:04,104 --> 01:27:07,014 Because Calboni is what will be, but knows a lot about cars. 1136 01:27:07,714 --> 01:27:10,344 Why, with Calboni went Honeymoon ... 1137 01:27:10,774 --> 01:27:11,594 In Capri? 1138 01:27:12,594 --> 01:27:13,984 Why? Where it' s good to go on honeymoon? 1139 01:27:16,854 --> 01:27:19,333 I don' t know... We could have gone to Venice! 1140 01:27:19,964 --> 01:27:21,924 Venice is so obvious... 1141 01:27:22,374 --> 01:27:25,144 It does not matter... what matters is... 1142 01:27:25,284 --> 01:27:27,114 To break with one' s past. 1143 01:27:27,134 --> 01:27:29,694 No, the important thing is arrive in time to last ferry. 1144 01:27:31,744 --> 01:27:33,584 Hurry, Fantozzi! 1145 01:27:33,684 --> 01:27:34,884 Be quick! 1146 01:27:35,264 --> 01:27:37,454 move the wheel! 1147 01:27:38,474 --> 01:27:39,884 faster! 1148 01:27:41,034 --> 01:27:42,774 Brake! Brake! 1149 01:27:43,614 --> 01:27:44,414 Brake! 1150 01:27:51,244 --> 01:27:52,984 Calboni is what will be, 1151 01:27:53,084 --> 01:27:55,094 but the day I came here with him, The day was superb! 1152 01:27:55,294 --> 01:27:56,854 The heat was like in Africa! 1153 01:27:57,964 --> 01:27:59,844 Ok, But Miss... 1154 01:28:00,464 --> 01:28:02,484 that was in July... 1155 01:28:03,244 --> 01:28:05,194 Today it' s the 20th of December. 1156 01:28:07,754 --> 01:28:10,624 I bet Calbonidid not even suffer dizziness... 1157 01:28:11,004 --> 01:28:13,484 You can say what you want about Calboni ... 1158 01:28:13,754 --> 01:28:15,634 but he endure sea as a battleship. 1159 01:28:18,514 --> 01:28:20,194 Don't tell me you' re going to throw up?! 1160 01:28:20,464 --> 01:28:21,554 No, no, no! I... 1161 01:28:21,934 --> 01:28:23,774 I am an aircraft carrier. An aircraft carrier! 1162 01:28:24,124 --> 01:28:25,304 An aircraft carrier! 1163 01:28:28,064 --> 01:28:28,874 Excuse me. 1164 01:28:32,644 --> 01:28:35,134 Man overboard! Man overboard! 1165 01:28:45,014 --> 01:28:46,354 To overcome Calboni, 1166 01:28:46,614 --> 01:28:49,774 Fantozzi chose the most luxurious hotel in Capri. 1167 01:28:50,374 --> 01:28:53,074 Also because, it was the only one open during winter. 1168 01:28:55,984 --> 01:28:57,924 - The bags, please. - Who is it? 1169 01:28:58,344 --> 01:28:59,864 - The bags! - Take these hands ... 1170 01:29:00,264 --> 01:29:02,444 Scoundrel! Bastard! 1171 01:29:02,646 --> 01:29:05,150 - Thief! - Give me back my stuff! 1172 01:29:09,254 --> 01:29:10,879 Excuse sorry ... 1173 01:29:10,914 --> 01:29:12,464 How violent you become with subordinates, Fantozzi. 1174 01:29:12,934 --> 01:29:15,574 i go to sit down, You go to the reception. 1175 01:29:15,944 --> 01:29:16,854 At your service, ma'am. 1176 01:29:21,494 --> 01:29:23,244 Good morning, sorry ... 1177 01:29:23,744 --> 01:29:26,844 Do you happen to have a Single Room for two? 1178 01:29:27,704 --> 01:29:29,054 We only have apartments sir. 1179 01:29:31,534 --> 01:29:32,814 How much? 1180 01:29:33,264 --> 01:29:34,834 - 60000. - Not more? 1181 01:29:34,934 --> 01:29:36,804 Fantozzi thought he meant 60000 per month. 1182 01:29:37,884 --> 01:29:39,304 We are in low season, sir. 1183 01:29:39,964 --> 01:29:42,964 The suite with sea view costs 80,000, sir. 1184 01:29:44,384 --> 01:29:46,904 Sir, if you want something special, we have the royal suite... 1185 01:29:46,914 --> 01:29:47,684 100 thousand. 1186 01:29:48,104 --> 01:29:50,314 - I take it! It' s mine! - Very well. 1187 01:29:50,554 --> 01:29:51,784 Do not give it away. 1188 01:29:52,084 --> 01:29:54,414 1189 01:29:55,054 --> 01:29:58,304 Now I give you my documents... Passport... 1190 01:29:58,754 --> 01:30:00,504 Of Ms... of Miss. 1191 01:30:00,814 --> 01:30:03,124 1192 01:30:03,344 --> 01:30:06,744 - I pay now. - Please afterward. After. 1193 01:30:06,794 --> 01:30:08,504 - Accompany him. - Payment after? 1194 01:30:08,574 --> 01:30:10,394 - Please. - Thanks. 1195 01:30:11,564 --> 01:30:13,514 - No problem. - Is the key? 1196 01:30:14,454 --> 01:30:18,124 An apartment like this per 100000, is worthy of the "Arabian Nights". 1197 01:30:18,604 --> 01:30:20,084 No big deal. 1198 01:30:20,364 --> 01:30:22,594 - This is the bedroom. - Not bad. 1199 01:30:23,154 --> 01:30:24,984 - With 2 bathrooms. - Of course. 1200 01:30:26,464 --> 01:30:28,574 It' s almost vulgar... 1201 01:30:34,004 --> 01:30:35,194 What happens? 1202 01:30:35,874 --> 01:30:37,254 - La llave en el pie... - Bien. 1203 01:30:37,404 --> 01:30:39,837 - The key in the foot ... - Well. 1204 01:30:39,838 --> 01:30:41,874 For dinner would you like the salon, or do you prefer to have it served here? 1205 01:30:42,264 --> 01:30:45,284 Here, with candlelight! An intimate dinner in the bedroom. 1206 01:30:45,734 --> 01:30:47,704 No, look, for me neither here or downstairs .. 1207 01:30:47,739 --> 01:30:49,734 I could not eat a caper tonight. 1208 01:30:50,164 --> 01:30:53,024 My only dream is to be inside this bed. 1209 01:30:53,744 --> 01:30:55,234 In the bed? No capers, 1210 01:30:55,235 --> 01:30:58,280 I don' t want them either! Go away! 1211 01:30:59,154 --> 01:31:00,589 Miss... 1212 01:31:02,824 --> 01:31:05,274 Ugo Fantozzi, What got into your head? 1213 01:31:05,504 --> 01:31:07,474 - What? - Calboni was who he was... 1214 01:31:07,914 --> 01:31:09,640 but to be gentle, on the first night... 1215 01:31:09,641 --> 01:31:11,954 he slept in a different room. Do you want to do less than him? 1216 01:31:12,044 --> 01:31:13,624 S�. I meant, no! 1217 01:31:13,704 --> 01:31:15,774 - Then go to sleep in a different room - S�. 1218 01:31:16,214 --> 01:31:18,074 - Go, understood? - S�. 1219 01:31:19,064 --> 01:31:21,534 - Good night. 1220 01:31:30,074 --> 01:31:32,674 - What do you want now? - ... My hand! 1221 01:31:32,774 --> 01:31:35,914 - What? - I left my hand... 1222 01:31:36,344 --> 01:31:37,454 In the room! 1223 01:31:38,434 --> 01:31:39,770 But I can leave it there tonight... 1224 01:31:39,771 --> 01:31:42,594 No, take it back. 1225 01:31:42,684 --> 01:31:44,344 And do not bother me anymore! 1226 01:31:45,534 --> 01:31:50,204 First day, in the morning. Tragic "shopping" to find the... 1227 01:31:50,664 --> 01:31:54,364 Caprese fisherman clogs, that looked very good on Calboni. 1228 01:31:55,284 --> 01:31:56,974 I love them! 1229 01:31:57,284 --> 01:31:59,364 You look unsure. Can you walk with them? 1230 01:31:59,614 --> 01:32:02,964 S�, s�, Miss, I can walk quite well. 1231 01:32:04,474 --> 01:32:06,384 Nearly as... 1232 01:32:06,574 --> 01:32:08,234 Fucking hell! 1233 01:32:39,603 --> 01:32:41,607 How are you doing? 1234 01:32:42,554 --> 01:32:44,764 Well! Very well! 1235 01:32:59,204 --> 01:33:00,264 Fantozzi! 1236 01:33:00,904 --> 01:33:03,044 Why not enter between the Strait cliffs? 1237 01:33:03,194 --> 01:33:04,594 Always did that! 1238 01:33:37,364 --> 01:33:38,504 Is this yours? 1239 01:33:39,104 --> 01:33:41,304 Yes, bring it to the Royal suite. 1240 01:33:48,174 --> 01:33:51,014 What? Where am I? 1241 01:33:53,144 --> 01:33:54,934 Oh, in the bedroom!. 1242 01:33:55,374 --> 01:33:56,764 - Miss! - yes! 1243 01:33:57,074 --> 01:33:58,504 - Where are you? - Here. 1244 01:33:58,874 --> 01:33:59,839 How are you doing? 1245 01:33:59,874 --> 01:34:01,224 Painting my lips. 1246 01:34:01,264 --> 01:34:02,404 Pin in the lips? 1247 01:34:02,494 --> 01:34:04,594 No, Fantozzi. Painting my lips. 1248 01:34:06,974 --> 01:34:08,404 Miss... 1249 01:34:08,564 --> 01:34:10,714 But I slept... Good morning... 1250 01:34:11,454 --> 01:34:14,584 In the bedroom? 1251 01:34:14,754 --> 01:34:16,354 - S�, s�. - How come? 1252 01:34:16,574 --> 01:34:17,864 S�, Fantozzi. 1253 01:34:19,074 --> 01:34:20,584 - What? - Everything. 1254 01:34:21,004 --> 01:34:24,264 - What!? - We did everything, Fantozzi. 1255 01:34:24,714 --> 01:34:25,934 miss... 1256 01:34:26,024 --> 01:34:28,344 I feel like angels singing. 1257 01:34:29,664 --> 01:34:32,004 always a poet, Fantozzi. 1258 01:34:34,174 --> 01:34:35,909 But Miss, I... 1259 01:34:35,944 --> 01:34:38,804 Do not remember anything... 1260 01:34:39,254 --> 01:34:40,424 That' s better, Fantozzi. 1261 01:34:41,184 --> 01:34:44,264 C'mon.was what he was... 1262 01:34:44,644 --> 01:34:46,074 But at this time he was in the pool. 1263 01:34:46,764 --> 01:34:48,119 Let' s go. 1264 01:34:48,854 --> 01:34:50,184 At the pool then. 1265 01:34:56,194 --> 01:34:58,704 Miss, now a bath, in memory of Calboni! 1266 01:34:59,394 --> 01:35:01,264 Waiter apologize, How's the pool's water? 1267 01:35:01,504 --> 01:35:02,394 What water!? 1268 01:35:09,074 --> 01:35:11,004 �Fantozzi! What do you do? 1269 01:35:11,274 --> 01:35:18,034 Come, Miss, do not be afraid. It's low, I feel the bottom. 1270 01:35:18,844 --> 01:35:22,054 Towards evening, Fantozzi attempted a desperate revenge. 1271 01:35:22,584 --> 01:35:24,204 I hear the sea! 1272 01:35:25,424 --> 01:35:27,164 You hear it and I'm there, 1273 01:35:27,364 --> 01:35:29,424 Because a dive like this... 1274 01:35:29,514 --> 01:35:32,194 Acapulco style, I' m sure Calboni did not do it. 1275 01:35:32,984 --> 01:35:35,424 Is it not too high for you? 1276 01:35:38,094 --> 01:35:40,470 Don' t worry Miss. There' s a boat down there... 1277 01:35:40,471 --> 01:35:42,304 Waiting in case... Here I go! 1278 01:35:43,694 --> 01:35:44,994 Virgin of the divers... 1279 01:36:04,064 --> 01:36:05,834 I see you've had a beautiful day ... 1280 01:36:19,034 --> 01:36:20,724 But this is my clothes. 1281 01:36:21,424 --> 01:36:24,224 And these shoes? 1282 01:36:24,704 --> 01:36:27,374 Sorry whose are those shoes? 1283 01:36:27,594 --> 01:36:31,104 Husband of Mrs... he came to spend the holidays with her. 1284 01:36:31,684 --> 01:36:33,014 they are already celebrating. 1285 01:36:33,734 --> 01:36:35,745 Already.. celebrating... 1286 01:36:35,816 --> 01:36:38,217 How long did it take for you to come! 1287 01:36:38,518 --> 01:36:41,314 Ya no aguantaba m�s. Chin-chin, my love. 1288 01:36:41,834 --> 01:36:44,381 Si, si, chin-chin, chin-chin. But swear... 1289 01:36:44,382 --> 01:36:46,344 That cockroach never touched you. 1290 01:36:46,794 --> 01:36:48,604 But of course I swear! 1291 01:36:49,254 --> 01:36:52,364 He believes I did let him. He fell for it like an idiot. 1292 01:36:52,694 --> 01:36:53,944 I pity him. 1293 01:37:03,394 --> 01:37:06,594 "Repairing the bottom of the pool, Mayor Penon arrangement ... 1294 01:37:06,654 --> 01:37:08,134 Compensation... 1295 01:37:09,044 --> 01:37:11,824 damages to the premises of the square by destruction of relics ... 1296 01:37:11,974 --> 01:37:14,594 four orderlies services, one recovery room ... 1297 01:37:14,954 --> 01:37:16,904 almost new boat completely destroyed ... 1298 01:37:16,954 --> 01:37:20,718 Accommodation of Ms and mr Calbony till Epiphany. 1299 01:37:21,824 --> 01:37:23,424 Will you pay cash? 1300 01:37:26,874 --> 01:37:28,049 promissory notes! 1301 01:37:28,084 --> 01:37:32,364 They were akilo and 250 grams, to be paid in 3 months. 1302 01:37:33,794 --> 01:37:36,584 Fantozzi signed them with icy indifference. 1303 01:37:37,004 --> 01:37:40,264 As he had already decided to kill himself... 1304 01:37:40,274 --> 01:37:42,064 Jumping from Thiberius cliff. 1305 01:37:47,569 --> 01:37:50,626 1306 01:38:01,604 --> 01:38:04,734 He had been fished by a fishing boat from Torre Anunziata... 1307 01:38:05,384 --> 01:38:08,082 re-sold him to "Findus" and offered for sale... 1308 01:38:08,083 --> 01:38:09,674 As frozen bass . 1309 01:38:14,184 --> 01:38:15,514 Merry Christmas, ma'am. What do you want? 1310 01:38:15,574 --> 01:38:19,264 - Merry Christmas. I want that. - That one? 1311 01:38:19,774 --> 01:38:20,744 Two good slices? 1312 01:38:20,884 --> 01:38:23,124 �No, no, no! I want it whole. 1313 01:38:23,626 --> 01:38:25,029 All of it! 1314 01:38:25,994 --> 01:38:27,034 How much is by Kg? 1315 01:38:45,364 --> 01:38:46,504 Ugo... 1316 01:38:47,394 --> 01:38:48,564 You' ll see, everything will get better. 1317 01:38:50,154 --> 01:38:52,384 Also at the Office. 1318 01:38:53,284 --> 01:38:54,474 And if not, it does not matter. 1319 01:38:55,154 --> 01:38:56,384 The only thing that matters, is that you love us. 1320 01:38:58,984 --> 01:39:00,054 Do you love us? 1321 01:39:00,794 --> 01:39:02,004 Do you love us, dad? 1322 01:39:07,674 --> 01:39:09,034 Ok, at the end... 1323 01:39:09,694 --> 01:39:10,884 Who cares! 1324 01:39:13,144 --> 01:39:14,024 Oh God! 1325 01:39:14,714 --> 01:39:15,974 Ugo, are you hurt? 1326 01:39:18,214 --> 01:39:19,734 Ugo, My love. 1327 01:39:27,134 --> 01:39:28,904 - Buon natale! 1328 01:39:38,954 --> 01:39:41,854 Hello? Yes, it' s me. Who' s there? 1329 01:39:43,824 --> 01:39:44,474 Who? 1330 01:39:45,804 --> 01:39:47,124 Is this a joke? 1331 01:39:47,544 --> 01:39:48,414 It wasn't. 1332 01:39:48,624 --> 01:39:52,494 It was really the Mega Galactic President himself. 1333 01:39:52,904 --> 01:39:55,094 Dear Fantozzi, First of all, Happy Christmas. 1334 01:39:55,534 --> 01:39:58,064 I have before me your request for readmission and his file. 1335 01:39:58,844 --> 01:40:01,850 Sorry if I disturb the privacy of your home on this holy night ... 1336 01:40:01,851 --> 01:40:05,205 but I spend here in my office, because for me work ... 1337 01:40:05,207 --> 01:40:06,214 is a prayer. 1338 01:40:06,715 --> 01:40:08,494 I need to talk to you for a moment. 1339 01:40:08,924 --> 01:40:10,464 Sit down and listen. 1340 01:40:32,294 --> 01:40:34,024 So, dear fantozzi, do you accept? 1341 01:40:35,912 --> 01:40:38,544 Fantozzi, are you here? 1342 01:40:39,034 --> 01:40:41,564 - I' ll accept anything! - But how? 1343 01:40:41,654 --> 01:40:43,574 You haven't even heard what I said. 1344 01:40:44,044 --> 01:40:45,434 I accept anything! 1345 01:40:45,514 --> 01:40:47,734 I surrender unconditionally! 1346 01:40:49,474 --> 01:40:52,924 Then come, Fantozzi dear... 1347 01:40:53,774 --> 01:40:55,644 What? Are you afraid? 1348 01:40:56,054 --> 01:40:57,614 But we love you so much. 1349 01:40:57,914 --> 01:41:00,334 That' s why I am afraid... 1350 01:41:00,954 --> 01:41:03,664 Let' s go! 1351 01:41:03,954 --> 01:41:06,164 Let's kill the fat calf! 1352 01:41:06,234 --> 01:41:07,154 Me? 1353 01:41:07,584 --> 01:41:10,714 No, you are the prodigal son. 1354 01:41:11,224 --> 01:41:15,054 the lost sheep who came back to our corral. 1355 01:41:16,064 --> 01:41:18,864 We say, welcome back. 1356 01:41:19,104 --> 01:41:20,934 thanks, will, you take me back? 1357 01:41:20,984 --> 01:41:21,924 Of course! 1358 01:41:22,314 --> 01:41:24,104 My old position? 1359 01:41:24,844 --> 01:41:27,444 No, we cannot do that. 1360 01:41:28,214 --> 01:41:30,634 But we'll give you something else. 1361 01:41:31,074 --> 01:41:32,584 - Meaning? - That is, 1362 01:41:32,704 --> 01:41:34,284 Apart from our forgiveness... 1363 01:41:34,484 --> 01:41:38,554 we offer you the purifying joy of earning your position. 1364 01:41:39,334 --> 01:41:45,109 You' ll start from the lower step, 1365 01:41:45,354 --> 01:41:48,685 we take you back as lightning rod... 1366 01:41:48,686 --> 01:41:51,409 ...lightning. 1367 01:41:52,574 --> 01:41:55,084 Fantozzi! Fantozzi! 1368 01:41:55,594 --> 01:41:57,494 I wish you a good work! 1369 01:41:57,634 --> 01:41:59,184 Dear Accountant! 1370 01:41:59,904 --> 01:42:02,394 And I recommend: Don' t be sad. 1371 01:42:03,014 --> 01:42:06,704 Laugh!. Laugh! Work is bliss. 1372 01:42:06,805 --> 01:42:09,010 Work is happiness! 1373 01:42:10,364 --> 01:42:12,784 That's it. So! 1374 01:42:15,496 --> 01:42:17,496 Let's go to work then! 1375 01:42:19,914 --> 01:42:23,209 Bravo! Good luck, Fantozzi! 1376 01:42:24,000 --> 01:42:27,099 1377 01:42:28,305 --> 01:42:34,657 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.SubtitleDB.org 105784