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1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,040
This programme
contains strong language
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Just wait there, love.
3
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Yes, come on.
4
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Not you. Not safe for you.
5
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Can I go now?
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Back! Get back!
7
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Go back! Go back! Right back!
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Hey, Timothy. I just wanted to
see your cute little face.
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Hey, Mom. Is everything OK?
10
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No, you broke-ass son of a bitch.
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You maxed out the account again.
12
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Your sugar mommy cannot keep
bailing you out.
13
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I think, in this instance,
it's just "mommy".
14
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Are you eating properly?
15
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Mom, I think we both know
I can't eat properly.
16
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You've got to eat, honey.
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Jesus, you'll lose about 1,000
calories just trying to sit still.
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Could you sit still? You're rocking
and rolling all over the place.
19
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OK, Mom. Is there anything else?
20
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Yeah. Just get your shit together.
Eat, wear your shoes.
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I got shoes.
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You did?
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If anything, they just make it
harder to walk.
24
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Is that where the money's gone?
On that gag?
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SHE LAUGHS
26
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Oh, Timmy, you're a piece of work!
27
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Oh... Right.
28
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Tuna...
29
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..pasta...
30
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..Cheerios...
31
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..and...
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..Tangfastics.
33
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Right, is there anything that you
want?
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Can I get some bread, some cheese?
35
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I'll put Doritos.
36
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They're sort of bread and cheese.
37
00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:29,400
Right. That'll do for now.
38
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:32,880
You probably can't carry
any more anyway.
39
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Oh, and, Tim, hurry up,
because I am starvin'.
40
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Fuck it.
41
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Is this food free?
42
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Yes. You no wait.
43
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Please, come to front.
44
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Oh...
45
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..shit!
46
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Allahu akbar.
47
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Er...
48
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Hakuna matata.
49
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Finally!
50
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Oh, you're not Tim.
51
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No, I'm Idris.
52
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Well, you're not an Idris either.
53
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Right, so why are you here?
54
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I've just got some job applications
for Tim to look over.
55
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Oh, your mum told you
to get out the house?
56
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No.
57
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Right, so, is Tim not in?
Maybe I'll just wait inside.
58
00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:31,440
Oh... No. He'll be hours.
59
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Hang on, you were clearly
just expecting him there.
60
00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:36,720
All right, Miss fucking Marple.
61
00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:41,920
But I'll warn you - I am very
comfortable with a silence.
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00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:43,680
SHE SIGHS
63
00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:53,800
Marhabaan. You all right?
64
00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:54,840
Yes, not too bad.
65
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Marhabaan.
66
00:05:05,280 --> 00:05:06,720
Sorry, my Arabic isn't great.
67
00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:08,080
Do you understand English?
68
00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:10,320
Oh, yeah.
69
00:05:10,320 --> 00:05:13,280
Or...a little. Little.
70
00:05:13,280 --> 00:05:15,920
My speech comes and goes.
71
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That's OK.
72
00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:20,520
Hi, I'm Benedict, campaign director
here at Refugee Effort.
73
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What can I call you, my friend?
74
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Mohammed...
75
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..Ali.
76
00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:28,320
Can I call you Ali?
77
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Yeah! Yeah.
78
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It's so nice to meet anyone that's
been displaced from their home
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for whatever reason.
80
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:37,120
You're always welcome here.
81
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I should go.
82
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:40,600
Sorry. Don't go.
83
00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:44,160
I'd really like to know a bit
more about your particular story.
84
00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:48,280
Maybe I could get you
some more food.
85
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:53,920
Could I get another
whole dinner to go?
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DRAMATIC MUSIC ON TV
87
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So...are you well?
88
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MUSIC STOPS
89
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Have you heard of simulation theory?
90
00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:11,960
Yes! Erm...
91
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,160
No.
92
00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:16,520
Well, it theorises that our entire
consciousness exists
93
00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:18,320
in a computer simulation.
94
00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:20,440
We're all just streams of code.
95
00:06:20,440 --> 00:06:23,680
Therefore, there's no actual
pain or pleasure.
96
00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:26,040
It's artificial.
97
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It's not real.
98
00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:32,640
You cannot suffer, as actions
have no material consequence.
99
00:06:34,080 --> 00:06:35,600
You see, if I do this...
100
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..it's not me doing it.
101
00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:41,440
It's the code. That's not real pain.
102
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It's just pixels.
103
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Hittin' pixels.
104
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,520
Sorry, and this is what you believe,
is it?
105
00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:49,560
No.
106
00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:51,640
SHE SIGHS
107
00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:53,120
Where the fuck is Tim?
108
00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:56,120
So, let me get this straight -
109
00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:59,440
North African Junior
Skateboarding Champion.
110
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Captured by Isis, escape.
111
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:04,880
Captured again, escape again.
112
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Brother killed, sister killed,
parents killed.
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Captured again.
114
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Tortured.
115
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Cerebral palsy.
116
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Escaped.
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Sea. Raft. swim.
118
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Britain?
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Yes.
120
00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:24,720
Can you get cerebral palsy
from torture?
121
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Yes.
122
00:07:26,160 --> 00:07:28,960
No, I just want to know as much
detail about this as possible.
123
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PHONE CHIMES
124
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I should go. Yeah, of course.
125
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Just before you do, though,
126
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I want to get a quick photo
for the magazine.
127
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It's such a great story.
People are going to love this.
128
00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:44,040
What else was I supposed to do,
Idris?!
129
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Give me one more sensible option.
130
00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:50,320
Maybe not taking the food out of the
mouths of starving refugees, Tim.
131
00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:54,680
You know, some of 'em were quite
fat.
132
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I don't even understand
why you were there.
133
00:07:56,920 --> 00:07:59,520
I don't understand why you're here.
134
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:03,040
Well, I was just hanging out,
just chatting with Ruth.
135
00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:05,520
She, er... She really is a
formidable intellect.
136
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This is fuckin' delicious!
137
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HE SNIGGERS
138
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Anyway, it might help with the
whole visa sitch.
139
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How? I'm a refugee now.
140
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They can't kick me out.
141
00:08:18,680 --> 00:08:21,320
Tim, they're not going to buy the
fact that you're an
142
00:08:21,320 --> 00:08:25,400
international junior skateboarding
champion...called Mohammed Ali.
143
00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:30,240
Ah, Ali after the Parkinson's -
144
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float like a butterfly,
shake like a shitting dog.
145
00:08:34,240 --> 00:08:38,320
Tim, you know this could actually
cost you a visa on a moral level?
146
00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:40,360
Shouldn't we be trying to help
Refugee Effort?
147
00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:41,920
What would you do about it, Barney?
148
00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,920
You just bang on without ever
actually lifting a finger.
149
00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:46,320
You're like Gary Lineker.
150
00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:48,280
I am NOT like Gary Lineker!
151
00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:51,680
OK, let me break a confidentiality,
152
00:08:51,680 --> 00:08:53,840
just to prove a point.
153
00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,240
There was a man. His name is Adnan.
154
00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:59,920
He was an architect
from Al-Safira in Syria.
155
00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:03,200
He came home one day to find
his house had been destroyed.
156
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:05,600
His young family killed.
157
00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:07,240
For real, Tim.
158
00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:10,840
He fled Assad and Isis
on a raft made of pallets.
159
00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:14,040
Came all the way to Britain to try
and rebuild his life here.
160
00:09:14,040 --> 00:09:19,280
He came to me, asked if I could help
him, and I did help him.
161
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:23,200
I got him an interview
at Bella Pasta.
162
00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:24,840
TIM SNIGGERS
163
00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:27,160
I mean, I don't think he actually
went for it.
164
00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,600
He told me to shove it up my arse
165
00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:32,000
and I've not seen him since, but the
point is I didn't just stand back
166
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,920
and do nothing, Ruth.
167
00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:34,960
PHONE VIBRATES
168
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:38,320
Oh, it's Benedict.
169
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,800
Ali, hi. In the hour since we put
the story up on the website,
170
00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:46,160
it's had such a great response.
Everyone's so moved.
171
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:50,600
I was wondering if we could actually
do a follow-up film,
172
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:53,480
and obviously we'd be able to help
you out with asylum applications,
173
00:09:53,480 --> 00:09:55,080
grants, food.
174
00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:57,800
What would be really good is if we
could actually come and see
175
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,040
where you live.
176
00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:00,720
You want to come here?
177
00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:02,760
Like, they could deliver this shit!
178
00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:04,120
Ask him to bring pudding.
179
00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:06,960
Ask him.
180
00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:09,000
Could you bring some pudding?
181
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:10,600
Er... Yeah, sure.
182
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:12,240
So, how about tomorrow?
183
00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:14,040
Yeah, around two?
184
00:10:14,040 --> 00:10:15,160
That's perfect.
185
00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:21,520
Gimpy! What the fuck?!
You're pretending you're Syrian?!
186
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:22,960
That's just hilarious!
187
00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:24,480
SHE LAUGHS
188
00:10:24,480 --> 00:10:28,960
You persuaded some people that you
could survive a war zone?
189
00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:32,680
Honey, you could barely
survive a womb,
190
00:10:32,680 --> 00:10:35,960
and that's like the easiest
place to survive.
191
00:10:35,960 --> 00:10:38,920
I love you, you fuckin' maniac.
192
00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:41,760
I'll come visit you in Guantanamo!
193
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:46,240
Love you!
194
00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:47,560
Thanks so much for this, Ali.
195
00:10:47,560 --> 00:10:49,840
I just thought a more familiar
environment would make
196
00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:52,040
for a more relaxed interview,
and the people coming
197
00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:54,840
onto our website, they want to see
what conditions for refugees
198
00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:56,960
are really like.
We can get you some help, you know.
199
00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:59,280
Someone to come round and do a
basic clean at least.
200
00:10:59,280 --> 00:11:00,680
Oh, yeah, that'd be great.
201
00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:02,600
Ah.
202
00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,000
These must be your cohabitants.
203
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,040
Hi, I'm Ben.
204
00:11:07,440 --> 00:11:08,480
And?
205
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:12,200
Oh, you're British.
206
00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:15,640
Sometimes we can be refugees
in our own country.
207
00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:18,400
Sometimes...
208
00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:20,800
..the things that we're running
away from are not drugs...
209
00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:23,480
If I appear in one frame
of your film,
210
00:11:23,480 --> 00:11:26,080
I will smash all of
your fucking toys.
211
00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:32,680
Hi, I'm Ben. Hi. Idris.
212
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:36,960
Ben, I do admire everything
you're doing.
213
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:38,360
You're British, too?
214
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:39,800
Yes, I'm...
215
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,160
The thing is, Ben...
216
00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:42,400
We're lovers.
217
00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:44,560
Yeah, we're lovers.
218
00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:46,480
Yeah, we're lovers. OK.
219
00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:49,280
Wow. This is perfect.
What a beautiful story.
220
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:51,600
It's got everything.
How did you meet?
221
00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:57,880
Idris has a heart the size
of a disabled toilet.
222
00:11:57,880 --> 00:12:00,200
He loves refugees,
223
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:02,800
don't you, Idris?
224
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:04,280
Erm...
225
00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:05,840
Yeah, but, erm...
226
00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:13,720
He calls me his little Piglet
and he's my grumpy old Eeyore!
227
00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,680
Ooh! A little kiss, there.
228
00:12:16,680 --> 00:12:18,600
Great. Let's get set up.
229
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:22,360
Sorry, so, can we just make it look
a bit more sub-poverty in there?
230
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:23,600
Action.
231
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:27,000
None more so than with this
remarkable man, Ali,
232
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:31,480
who fled Syria, despite suffering
from quite a severe disability.
233
00:12:32,760 --> 00:12:34,280
Let's go again.
234
00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:41,760
None more so than this remarkable
man, Ali, who fled Syria,
235
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:44,920
despite suffering from
quite a severe disability.
236
00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:47,360
Here he is with his partner,
Idris Allah.
237
00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:48,880
Hi.
238
00:12:48,880 --> 00:12:52,400
What can you tell us now
about this remarkable story?
239
00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:53,840
Well, Ben...
240
00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:00,800
..I come from a town called
Al-Safira,
241
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,560
where I worked as an architect.
242
00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:04,720
Are you kidding?
243
00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:12,560
But when I got to Britain,
no-one helped me at all.
244
00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:17,920
I was sent to one
employment agency...
245
00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:21,960
..but the guy there was so bad...
246
00:13:21,960 --> 00:13:26,320
Well... ..so bad, like, bottom of
the barrel...
247
00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:27,800
Scum. Scum.
248
00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:30,360
..I just thought about
killing myself.
249
00:13:30,360 --> 00:13:32,040
Course you did. Ben, this is...
250
00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:34,760
And am I right in thinking that your
main passion
251
00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:36,640
isn't actually architecture?
252
00:13:36,640 --> 00:13:38,240
Isn't it?
253
00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:39,760
No.
254
00:13:39,760 --> 00:13:42,320
Ali used to be a
champion skateboarder.
255
00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:46,000
That was until the torture
and the treatment from Isis
256
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:48,680
changed his life forever.
257
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:51,320
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
258
00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:54,520
And then I think if you just say
you can't wait to get on board.
259
00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,680
What? I just that'd be quite
poignant, you know,
260
00:13:56,680 --> 00:14:00,040
with the skateboarding
thing and all this.
261
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:02,560
I can't wait to get on board.
262
00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:03,760
Great.
263
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:06,440
Perfect. Let's cut there, then.
That's really good.
264
00:14:06,440 --> 00:14:07,480
Oh, she's back.
265
00:14:09,680 --> 00:14:12,200
What else was I supposed to do,
Idris?
266
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:16,240
Give me one more sensible option.
Just one.
267
00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:18,600
Well, I don't understand
why we had to be lovers.
268
00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:22,000
Why can't we just be friends?
No-one would believe that.
269
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,440
Barney, you're somewhere
between a hanger-on
270
00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:26,400
and a groupie at best.
271
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:28,400
Why do you hate gay people?
272
00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:31,280
What? I don't hate gay people.
273
00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:33,240
I love the LGBTQ community.
274
00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,600
Oh, yeah? What does the Q stand for?
275
00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:37,880
Er...
276
00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:41,280
Well, I don't know, but
I celebrate diversity.
277
00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:43,520
My best friend growing up was gay.
278
00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:45,720
OK. I'm calling it out.
279
00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:47,480
Who? Gary Flowerdew.
280
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,200
What?! That was his name!
281
00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:50,880
Look, he's in my phone.
282
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:53,320
I helped him through some
tough times, growing up.
283
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,560
Back in Wales,
he was the only gay in the...
284
00:14:55,560 --> 00:14:56,960
Come on, that's true!
285
00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:58,400
Oh, OK, yeah, sure.
286
00:14:58,400 --> 00:14:59,440
It's loaded.
287
00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:04,600
You guys.
288
00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,480
Welcome to The Ali Show.
289
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:10,120
Hi, I'm Benedict Armstrong Jones,
290
00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:13,240
campaign director
here at Refugee Effort.
291
00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:16,400
I've been helping refugees
for over three years now and I think
292
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:18,560
it's fair to say they love me.
293
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:23,680
I can identify the place value
of each digit...
294
00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:27,800
Without my help, they wouldn't be
able to read or write,
295
00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:29,920
and I insist on providing
traditional meals
296
00:15:29,920 --> 00:15:31,440
to remind them of home.
297
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:33,240
Not too spicy? Thank you.
298
00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:37,120
Now I'm going to introduce
you to someone very special.
299
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:40,040
Ali from Al-Safira, who fled Syria,
300
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:43,760
despite suffering from
quite a severe disability.
301
00:15:43,760 --> 00:15:46,720
Every kid dreams of being
a skateboard champion
302
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:50,040
and, growing up in Syria,
Ali was no different,
303
00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:54,800
but after Isis took over his village
and cerebral palsy his body,
304
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:57,880
Ali could no longer do the
thing he so loved,
305
00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:00,160
until I, Benedict Armstrong Jones,
306
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:03,400
found him starving and hungry at
Refugee Effort.
307
00:16:03,400 --> 00:16:06,920
Now, with my help, Ali has turned
his life around and he...
308
00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:09,720
Can't wait to get on board.
309
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:12,040
Yes, I'm Benedict Armstrong Jones.
310
00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:16,240
And if you want to help my fight
against injustice, donate £5
311
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:21,680
by texting Get On Board to 34765.
312
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,680
I mean, I know it's for a
good cause,
313
00:16:23,680 --> 00:16:25,880
but it seemed to be just a film
about him.
314
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,920
Do you think this will
piss off Immigration?
315
00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:30,280
I don't like this.
316
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:32,040
I don't like it one bit.
317
00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:35,400
I agree with Barney,
and that is a horrible feeling.
318
00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:38,680
I think this prick
is exploiting you.
319
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:56,600
Er, Ben? We need to talk.
320
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,880
Hey, guys. Listen, the response has
been amazing.
321
00:16:59,880 --> 00:17:03,040
We've already raised £60,000
for the refugee appeal
322
00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:04,760
and the comments have been
astonishing,
323
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:07,840
so many positive things
said about me... Us. You.
324
00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:10,440
Now, I've actually been calling
you to talk about the next stage
325
00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:11,760
of the campaign.
326
00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,720
I have this incredible...
327
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:16,880
No, actually, I'm going to
let that be a surprise.
328
00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,400
Did you say 60,000 for the refugees?
329
00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:24,360
No, I'm sorry, but this man
is not called Ali.
330
00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:25,400
He's called Tim.
331
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:28,240
And he's not from Syria.
332
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:29,440
You're not a refugee?
333
00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:32,480
Well, I am, but I'm from America
334
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:35,800
and I'm not...I'm not running away
from Isis,
335
00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:39,200
I'm running away from my mother.
336
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:40,440
But it's still oppression.
337
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:43,440
Why does this shit always
happen to me?
338
00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:46,600
And I suppose the whole
disabled thing...
339
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:48,040
Jesus!
340
00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:50,760
Oh, no. That part's true.
341
00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:52,560
I was going to be on
fucking Newsnight.
342
00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:54,480
Well, it's not all about you, is it,
mate?
343
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,560
You don't care about people,
you just care about yourself.
344
00:17:57,560 --> 00:18:00,760
Look at Sir fucking Ponce-alot
on his high fucking horse.
345
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:03,000
I've raised 60 grand for charity.
What have you done?
346
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,920
Whatever I do, I do it from pure
motives.
347
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:07,080
What, you and your lying,
freeloading boyfriend?
348
00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:09,560
Yeah. No. No, that was a lie as
well.
349
00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:10,840
Not that it matters.
350
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,640
You're just exploiting Tim.
351
00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:15,520
Is this liberal trash talk turning
you on?
352
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,040
By the time I'm finished with you,
353
00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:18,880
you'll have more than
a bleeding heart.
354
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:21,360
I'll write a letter to The Guardian.
OK, shut the fuck up.
355
00:18:21,360 --> 00:18:25,240
Look, Barney, you want loads of
money for refugees, right? Yep.
356
00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:29,120
Benedickhead, you want to make up
for not getting into film school.
357
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:32,240
Well, me and Tim,
we want more free shit.
358
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:33,920
So there. We can all win.
359
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:37,320
Right, what's your next big film
surprise?
360
00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:40,760
Next door, I've got a room full of
people from Al-Safira.
361
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:42,680
I wanted to film an
emotional reunion.
362
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,400
Look, I'm sorry, but you're going to
363
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:46,360
have to pretend for a little bit
longer.
364
00:18:46,360 --> 00:18:47,720
And if you don't,
365
00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,400
I'll tell the police that you
defrauded the charity.
366
00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:02,800
THEY GREET HIM
367
00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,840
Al Jazeera!
368
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:09,760
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk
369
00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:11,920
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk
370
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:14,160
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk
371
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:19,080
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk
372
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:21,240
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk
373
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:23,240
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk
374
00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:28,400
Upon arriving to the melting pot
375
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:31,000
Officer gets me naturalised
376
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:33,000
Immigrant, immigrant,
immigrant punk...
377
00:19:33,050 --> 00:19:37,600
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