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www.titlovi.com
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TIM:
Time is a funny thing.
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- When I was a kid...
- YOUNG TIM: One.
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- The days lasted forever.
- Two.
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- Hide, hide, hide!
- Three.
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- TIM: But the years...
- Wait! Over here.
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- Well, they went by so fast.
- Four.
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- Five. Six.
- Tim, no peeking.
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TED SR.:
Yeah, no peeking.
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- TIM: Before you know it...
- Seven.
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- You're all grown-up.
- Eight.
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- It even happened to me.
- Nine.
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Nine and a half. Ten!
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Ready or not, here I come.
(grunts)
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My name's Tim, and this...
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00:01:27,796 --> 00:01:29,756
well, this is
the rest of my story.
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- (roars playfully)
- Run for your lives!
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(laughing):
No fair, Dad. You peeked.
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00:01:33,176 --> 00:01:34,928
(laughter, squealing)
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-They call me a stay-at-homedad, which means...-Let's go!
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I hardly get to stay at home.
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Buckle up, Templetons.
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Ready?
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00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,437
- Set.
- Go!
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(engine roars, tires squeal)
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TIM:
Now, some might say
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00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:50,610
I still have
an overactive imagination,
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00:01:50,652 --> 00:01:54,072
but being a dad is
the coolest job in the world.
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Bunch of cool jobs, really.
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(laughing)
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Sometimes I'm a race car driver.
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CAROL:
Whoo! Daddy-o Andretti!
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00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:02,664
TABITHA:
Yay, Templetons!
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00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:04,308
TIM (Southern accent):
Well, and then sometimes
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00:02:04,332 --> 00:02:05,875
I'm the best darn cook
in the county
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00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:07,168
and I deal out every meal.
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00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:09,421
- Come on, Pa, hit me.
- (burps)
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- (chuckles) Tina.
- (Tina laughs)
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Whew, doggie!
And the house wins again.
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- (thunder crashes)
- CAROL: Yay! -TABITHA: Woo-hoo!
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00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:17,929
TIM (spooky voice): Or a
surgeon, if need be. (chuckles)
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- Spork.
- Spork.
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- Spatula.
- Spatula.
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Give my creature life!
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- (growling)
- (Carol and Tabitha gasp)
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She's alive!
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TIM: We have our ups,
and we have our downs.
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- (whimpers)
- No, no, no. Look. Look.
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- Lamb Lamb's okay. See?
- Yay!
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TIM:
But we always stick together.
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00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:38,658
- My wife, Carol.
- It's a miracle!
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TIM: She's the
breadwinner of the family.
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-(applause) -Thank you.
You know what they say:
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00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:44,247
- "It's all about the dough."
- (laughter)
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And I couldn't have done it
without my husband.
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He really rose to the occasion.
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- It's the yeast I can do.
- (cheering) -Yeah, Mama!
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00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:52,213
TIM:
She brings home the bacon, too,
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00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:54,424
while I keep an eye
on our new baby, Tina.
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00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:56,426
(chuckles):
But sometimes, feels like
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00:02:56,468 --> 00:02:58,386
she's keeping an eye on me.
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00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:00,013
- And Tabitha...
- Thank you!
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00:03:00,055 --> 00:03:02,182
Our little second-grader
who just got accepted
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00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:03,826
- into the best school in town.
- (laughter)
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00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:05,143
Yay, Tabitha!
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00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,644
TIM:
We're so proud.
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00:03:06,686 --> 00:03:08,331
I still keep in touch
with the old gang, too.
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00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,856
Believe it or not,
Jimbo is mayor now.
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00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:11,625
- BOTH: Cookie!
- Of course, his wife, Staci,
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00:03:11,649 --> 00:03:13,443
is the real brains
behind the operation.
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00:03:13,485 --> 00:03:15,320
- MAN: Yo, Jimbo!
- Now, the Triplets...
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- ♪ Busted... ♪
- ♪ Busted... ♪
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- ♪ Busted. ♪
- (sirens wailing)
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TIM: Yeah,
they haven't changed much.
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00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:21,910
And as for my baby brother, Ted,
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00:03:21,951 --> 00:03:24,037
well, he grew up
to be the boss, all right.
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00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:26,623
-He's so busy we hardly seehim anymore.-(toy squeaking)
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- (phone rings)
- But, hey, he always remembers
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00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,919
to send inappropriately
lavish gifts
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00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:32,712
- on special occasions.
- (Tabitha squeals)
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00:03:32,754 --> 00:03:35,548
- OMG! Uncle Ted is the best!
- (neighing)
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- (clatters)
- (Tim gasps)
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(sighs)
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00:03:38,927 --> 00:03:40,345
TIM:
All in all,
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00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:42,263
my life is pretty perfect.
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00:03:42,305 --> 00:03:43,616
(insects trilling,
birds chirping)
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00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,850
But all that
was about to change.
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(yelps, gasps)
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00:03:47,936 --> 00:03:49,145
Good heavens.
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00:03:49,187 --> 00:03:51,314
I'll save you!
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00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,316
- Ha!
- (Tina screams, laughs)
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Thanks, babe.
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00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:56,319
Stay calm, Tabitha.
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00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:57,779
I'm coming for you.
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00:03:57,821 --> 00:04:01,783
I'm gonna save you
from the bubbling lava!
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00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:03,410
Dad, what are you doing?
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00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:05,829
Ew, gross. It went everywhere.
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00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:08,415
Come on, this is
the candy volcano of doom!
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00:04:08,456 --> 00:04:10,625
You used to love it.
(mimics explosion)
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00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,752
But I'm trying
to do my homework,
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00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,254
or I'm doomed.
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00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:16,006
Oh.
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00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:18,216
Because if there's
one thing I've learned,
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00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:19,926
you're only a kid once.
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Once you grow up,
you can never go back.
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(babbling)
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Ee...!
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(grunts)
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(gasps) Oh, no.
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00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:38,737
Good night, Dr. Hawking.
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00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:46,828
Carbon, boron, beryllium,
lithium, helium, hydrogen.
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Nailed it.
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Boom shakalaka.
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(laughs)
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"Carry the four."
(chuckles) Gosh.
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- TIM: Hey there, Tabitha.
- (Carol whoops, Tina laughs)
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It's The Good Night Show.
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00:04:59,674 --> 00:05:02,552
Live from your bedroom,
starring Dad and Mom.
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00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:05,305
- And special guest, baby Tina.
- (laughing)
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00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:07,474
Good night, little Tina. Mwah!
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00:05:07,515 --> 00:05:09,267
Come back here, you.
(chuckles)
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00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:10,852
- Good night, Mom.
- Mwah!
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Good night, sweetheart.
Mama's gonna kiss you.
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- Mama gonna kiss you.
- (Tim clears throat)
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♪ Good night song ♪
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- ♪ With your dad... ♪
- What?
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00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,333
What? It's time for
your good-night song.
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00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,028
Oh, no, thanks.
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00:05:20,070 --> 00:05:22,405
I'm listening to white noise!
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Helps me fall asleep!
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(mimicking white noise)
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00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:28,370
Hey, what would you say
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to me helping you rehearse
for the holiday pageant?
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00:05:31,373 --> 00:05:32,791
- (gasps)
- Yes! Right?
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00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,668
I can come to school with you,
and you can get
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00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:36,354
all your friends together,
and we can rehearse together,
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00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:38,338
go get some ice cream after.
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00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:40,423
- My treat.
- No! You can't do that.
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00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,467
Um, liability issues.
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It's this whole thing.
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00:05:44,386 --> 00:05:46,680
Oh. Right, right.
(chuckles)
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Right.
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00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:50,558
Whoa. How about your favorite
bedtime story?
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You know, the one about...
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00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,562
Uncle Ted was
a magical talking baby.
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00:05:54,604 --> 00:05:56,606
There was a rocket
full of puppies,
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- and you saved the world.
- (shushing)
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00:05:58,650 --> 00:06:00,026
It was a good story, wasn't it?
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00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:04,072
Well, it didn't really make
a lot of sense.
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00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,865
The jokes were good, right?
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00:06:05,907 --> 00:06:07,325
Mm.
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00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,369
- Okay. Um...
- Dad.
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00:06:09,411 --> 00:06:10,662
(yawns)
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My schedule is brutal tomorrow.
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00:06:13,081 --> 00:06:16,042
(grunting): Yeah. My schedule's
pretty brutal, too.
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Oh, don't forget Lamb Lamb.
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Good night, Lamb Lamb.
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(kisses)
Good night, Uncle Ted.
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00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:24,634
I hope to grow up and be
a success, just like you.
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00:06:24,676 --> 00:06:26,928
Maybe we'll see you soon.
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Good night, Tabitha.
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00:06:33,977 --> 00:06:36,938
Don't you think
I'm a little old for that now?
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00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:39,607
Uh, okay.
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00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:42,152
I think it's time
we both grow up.
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00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:45,530
I look forward to greeting you
at the breakfast table.
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Sweet dreams.
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00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:11,723
Hmm.
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00:07:13,016 --> 00:07:15,101
♪ ♪
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00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,443
Where has the time gone?
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WIZZIE:
How should I know? (grunts)
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00:07:25,945 --> 00:07:28,698
- Wait, wait. I see light.
- (toy train tooting)
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00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:31,659
You, oh, out of my way.
(yells)
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(gasps) At long last.
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The sweet breath of freedom.
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Wizzie?
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You there, what century is this?
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00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:41,795
(shudders)
Unhand me, vile ogre!
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00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:43,380
No, no, no, no.
Wizzie, it's me.
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00:07:43,421 --> 00:07:44,923
- It's Tim.
- (gasps)
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00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,883
Is it really you?
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00:07:46,925 --> 00:07:48,551
Come closer.
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00:07:48,593 --> 00:07:50,512
Let me see your face.
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00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,305
Closer.
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00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:54,391
Closer still.
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00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:56,226
Oh, Timothy.
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00:07:56,267 --> 00:07:57,477
It is you.
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00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,187
Hey! What was that for?
188
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:01,398
You cast me into
eternal darkness
189
00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:04,317
and wreaked havoc
on my circadian rhythms.
190
00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:05,652
I'm sorry, Wizzie.
191
00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:07,320
Hey, but you look great, though.
192
00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:09,531
Except for the arm, you mean.
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00:08:09,572 --> 00:08:10,824
(chuckles)
I didn't even notice.
194
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:12,259
- You thought it.
- I mean, I noticed it,
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00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:13,886
'cause I... you obviously
don't have an arm. I-I...
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00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:15,787
You would never treat
Lamb Lamb this way.
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00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:18,581
Well, I... I gave her
to my daughter, Tabitha.
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00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:20,375
You have produced
an heir, Timothy?
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00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:21,710
Two, actually.
200
00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,253
Two? Let the bells ring!
201
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:24,629
(bells jingling, alarms blaring)
202
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,297
- No, no, no. Wizzie, stop.
- Yes! Yes!
203
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,192
- Wizzie, shh! Quiet, quiet.
- It's a time for celebration!
204
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:30,176
No, no, no. It's not
the time for celebration.
205
00:08:30,218 --> 00:08:31,904
- Wizzie, shh. Be quiet.
- What? What is it?
206
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,805
- What is it, Tim?
- I don't know.
207
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:35,647
- (alarms stop)
- I guess I'm just not feeling
208
00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,767
very celebratory right now.
209
00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:39,686
Oh?
210
00:08:39,728 --> 00:08:41,521
Tabitha. (sighs)
211
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:45,692
Man, Wizzie,
she's growing up so fast.
212
00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:47,736
It's like she doesn't even
need me anymore.
213
00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:51,322
Yes, first, they start
spending less time with you.
214
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:52,782
TIM:
Mm.
215
00:08:52,824 --> 00:08:54,993
Then they stop coming
to you for advice.
216
00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:55,994
Exactly.
217
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,121
Soon, they take you for granted.
218
00:08:58,163 --> 00:08:59,539
I guess.
219
00:08:59,581 --> 00:09:01,499
- Then break your arm.
- What?
220
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,084
Then stuff you into a box!
221
00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:05,045
Okay. Wizzie, you're...
you're not helping.
222
00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:06,338
(Wizzie scoffs)
223
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:07,714
Okay, I'm just... I'm afraid
224
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:09,799
Tabitha and I are growing apart,
225
00:09:09,841 --> 00:09:12,886
like... like I did
with my brother.
226
00:09:12,927 --> 00:09:14,596
Oh.
227
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:17,682
I thought we had
all the time in the world.
228
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,393
But you can't
turn back time, can you?
229
00:09:20,435 --> 00:09:23,021
How dare you question my power!
230
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:26,441
- Turn back. Turn back.
- Oh, here we go.
231
00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:29,069
- Oh, great wheel of li...
- Wait. (shushes)
232
00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:30,904
- (Wizzie snoring)
- Did you hear that?
233
00:09:30,945 --> 00:09:33,907
(gasps)
Never abuse the snooze button!
234
00:09:33,948 --> 00:09:36,010
(shushes) It sounds like it's
coming from the baby's room.
235
00:09:36,034 --> 00:09:37,994
What is it?
A creature of the night?
236
00:09:38,036 --> 00:09:41,081
Witches? Is it the baying
of the hounds of hell?
237
00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:42,415
Wizzie!
238
00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:43,583
Don't go, Tim!
239
00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:45,168
I can turn back time...
240
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:48,755
To the golden years,
when it was just you and me.
241
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:50,423
My good arm.
242
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:52,175
Don't open the door.
243
00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:54,094
(fading in distance):
Remember last time!
244
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:56,638
(muffled voice
speaking indistinctly)
245
00:09:57,806 --> 00:09:59,808
AUTOMATED VOICE: If you would
like to make a call,
246
00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:01,309
please hang up and try again.
247
00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:05,480
If you need help, hang up
and then dial your operator.
248
00:10:05,522 --> 00:10:07,273
Thank you.
249
00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:08,441
(whispers):
Hello?
250
00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:10,026
If you would like
to make a call,
251
00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:12,696
- please hang up and try again.
- Ah. Just my phone.
252
00:10:12,737 --> 00:10:14,823
Get it together, man.
253
00:10:14,864 --> 00:10:17,158
Oh, Tina, you little klepto...
254
00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,244
Nighty night.
255
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:20,453
Maniac!
256
00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,956
(rapid babbling)
257
00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:24,124
Whoa!
258
00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:26,876
Hi, Daddy.
259
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:28,962
T-Tabitha? Is that you?
260
00:10:29,004 --> 00:10:30,213
(laughing)
261
00:10:30,255 --> 00:10:31,631
(gasps)
262
00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,675
(laughing):
You should've seen your face.
263
00:10:33,717 --> 00:10:35,552
Oh, it's priceless.
264
00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:37,053
You're... You... You-you...
265
00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:39,472
(mock gasping)
266
00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:40,974
You-you can talk?
267
00:10:41,016 --> 00:10:43,143
Yep.
I'm in the family business.
268
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,812
(whispers):
It's a clip-on tie. (shushes)
269
00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:48,106
You see, Daddy,
BabyCorp is more of what I...
270
00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:49,774
Oops.
271
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,152
Daddy, Daddy, come in.
Can you hear me?
272
00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:53,793
- Daddy, do you read me?
- (Tim groaning)
273
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:55,488
Daddy, how many fingers
am I holding up?
274
00:10:55,530 --> 00:10:56,698
Thursday?
275
00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:58,009
I should've given you a warning.
276
00:10:58,033 --> 00:10:59,534
I forgot you were an old man.
277
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:01,036
(yells, spits)
278
00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,037
Wait, wait.
279
00:11:02,078 --> 00:11:03,913
- You're from BabyCorp?
- Yes.
280
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:05,915
BabyCorp is more of what I call
281
00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:07,751
- a side hustle for me.
- Uh-huh.
282
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:09,836
The point is I'm all in
on the Templetons.
283
00:11:09,878 --> 00:11:11,338
- Go, Templetons!
- Oh! Okay.
284
00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:13,173
You guys really know
how to baby a baby.
285
00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:14,775
- I mean, it's incredible.
- Oh, oh. (chuckles)
286
00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:16,343
Not that's it's all five-star.
287
00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:18,362
-I have to say, you got
a lot of issues. -Sure. Yeah.
288
00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:19,554
We'll talk about that later.
289
00:11:19,596 --> 00:11:20,972
Oh, my gosh.
I can't believe this.
290
00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:23,141
Hey, want to go scare
the crap out of Mom?
291
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:25,101
- Daddy, please stay focused.
- (chuckles) Oh.
292
00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:26,644
(grunts)
Right, right, right.
293
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:28,355
There's a crisis at BabyCorp.
294
00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:29,481
What is it this time?
295
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,523
(gasps) Kittens?
296
00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:32,650
No. This time, it's even worse.
297
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:33,902
- Worse than kittens?
- Yes.
298
00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,695
That's why I volunteered for
299
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:37,572
- this supersecret assignment.
- TOY: Mommy.
300
00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:39,508
Ooh, I want to help.
What-what do you want me to do?
301
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,034
That's the spirit, Daddy.
302
00:11:41,076 --> 00:11:43,870
- You are exactly who I need.
- Yes!
303
00:11:43,912 --> 00:11:45,663
To get Uncle Ted.
304
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,374
No. What?
305
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:48,875
What-What's with the face?
306
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:51,378
Daddy, BabyCorp can't wait
any longer.
307
00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:52,671
All the pressure's on me, Pop.
308
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:54,881
When I volunteered for this gig,
309
00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:56,800
I thought it would be easy.
310
00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,385
But you two never
see each other.
311
00:11:58,426 --> 00:11:59,969
It's so sad.
312
00:12:00,011 --> 00:12:02,180
It's like, "F-minus.
See me after class."
313
00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:03,390
(gargles)
314
00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:04,724
Sad? Uh, yeah, maybe.
315
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:05,934
A little. I don't know.
316
00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,352
Did you forget to call him?
317
00:12:07,394 --> 00:12:09,270
I noticed you can be
a little absentminded.
318
00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:10,647
Sorry, what?
319
00:12:10,689 --> 00:12:12,399
It's just that you tend
to procrastinate.
320
00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:14,585
-You have to get him here for
the holidays. -(line ringing)
321
00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:15,878
- No, I'm not...
- (ringing stops)
322
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,296
No, I'm not
gonna call him right now.
323
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:18,756
- Daddy, can't never could.
- No. -(line ringing)
324
00:12:18,780 --> 00:12:20,132
Did you two have
a fight or something?
325
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:21,908
- No.
- But you're mad at him?
326
00:12:21,950 --> 00:12:24,202
- Stop that. It's complicated.
- (ringing stops)
327
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:26,347
-Why? Do you need help using
your phone? -(line ringing)
328
00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:28,099
-No, I don't need help
using my... -(ringing stops)
329
00:12:28,123 --> 00:12:29,642
- Okay. What's the problem?
- (sighs) -(line ringing)
330
00:12:29,666 --> 00:12:31,126
What's the issue?
Talk to me.
331
00:12:31,167 --> 00:12:32,877
- There's no point, okay?
- (ringing stops)
332
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,921
I call him. I invite him.
He never shows up.
333
00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:36,923
He's always got a work meeting
or a business trip
334
00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:38,591
or a conference call.
335
00:12:38,633 --> 00:12:40,468
All he cares about is work.
336
00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:44,431
But after a while, you...
you just stop trying.
337
00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:46,641
- He's still your brother.
- (line ringing)
338
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:48,935
You were partners.
339
00:12:48,977 --> 00:12:50,705
-Yeah, I guess sometimes
you just... -(ringing stops)
340
00:12:50,729 --> 00:12:54,816
you grow up and grow apart.
341
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:57,902
- (line ringing)
- (gasps)
342
00:12:57,944 --> 00:12:59,571
Daddy, don't say no.
343
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:00,989
What if everybody said no?
344
00:13:01,031 --> 00:13:02,157
Nothing would happen.
345
00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:03,575
Nothing would get
off the ground.
346
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:04,909
You got to wake up every day
347
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:06,703
and you got to say,
"Yes, yes, yes!"
348
00:13:06,745 --> 00:13:10,123
Surprise me. Say yes.
349
00:13:10,165 --> 00:13:11,291
(sighs)
350
00:13:11,332 --> 00:13:12,167
(ringing stops)
351
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:14,794
This is really disappointing.
352
00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:17,088
- And now I'm getting mad!
- It's late.
353
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,174
We can work on this
tomorrow, okay?
354
00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:20,884
- (grunts)
- (toy squeaks)
355
00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:23,803
Oh. Whoopsie.
Your little horsey fell off.
356
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:26,348
Another day won't hurt, right?
357
00:13:27,349 --> 00:13:28,850
Good night, sweetie.
358
00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:30,602
- (door closes)
- (scoffs)
359
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:33,188
(tape rewinding)
360
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:34,647
TIM (recorded):
Good night, sweetie.
361
00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:36,483
- Horsey fell off.
- (rewinding)
362
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:38,151
Tabitha?
363
00:13:41,363 --> 00:13:43,406
♪ ♪
364
00:13:50,872 --> 00:13:52,999
(low rumbling, objects rattling)
365
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:56,503
Huh?
366
00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:58,380
(gasps, squeals)
367
00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,437
♪ ♪
368
00:14:25,824 --> 00:14:27,409
Uh, don't worry. I got it.
369
00:14:27,450 --> 00:14:29,303
- (Tim yells, groans)
- Where is she? Where is she?
370
00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:31,055
- Where's who? What?
- I came as fast as I could.
371
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,580
- Ted?
- I canceled all my meetings.
372
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,558
What are you doing here?
(grunts) Why are you yelling?
373
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:35,792
- Where's Tabitha?
- Tabitha?
374
00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:37,210
- Where is she, Tim?
- CAROL: Ted.
375
00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:38,896
Uncle Ted, you're here!
You're really here.
376
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,463
-Which arm is it?
Left or right? -Huh?
377
00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:42,382
- Is it your fibula? Talk to me.
- Whoa.
378
00:14:42,424 --> 00:14:44,050
- Good dilation. Open up.
- (groans)
379
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:45,987
- Say, "Ah." Are you okay?
- Wh-What are you doing?
380
00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:47,262
- You look okay.
- Whoa.
381
00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,055
Don't worry.
I'm fine, Uncle Ted.
382
00:14:49,097 --> 00:14:51,391
- That's my girl.
- Woo-hoo.
383
00:14:51,433 --> 00:14:53,018
Uh, wh-what brings you
into town?
384
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:54,394
Well, Tabitha fell off her pony.
385
00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:56,229
- She did?
- She did?
386
00:14:56,271 --> 00:14:57,230
I did?
387
00:14:57,272 --> 00:14:59,399
- Tim left me a voice mail.
- He did?
388
00:14:59,441 --> 00:15:00,942
- I did?
- You did.
389
00:15:00,984 --> 00:15:02,878
TIM (cobbled from recording):
Hello. This is your brother.
390
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:04,571
Help. Tabitha fell off horsey.
391
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:05,822
Good night, sweetie.
392
00:15:05,864 --> 00:15:07,490
Well, that was unsettling.
393
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:11,077
I swear I didn't
leave that message.
394
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:14,164
- (coos)
- On... purpose.
395
00:15:14,205 --> 00:15:15,290
I...
396
00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:16,291
Butt-dialed?
397
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:17,792
(chuckles)
With my butt.
398
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:19,169
While I was talking in my sleep.
399
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,754
I do that sometimes.
400
00:15:20,795 --> 00:15:22,380
You sleep-butt-dialed me?
401
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:25,467
- With my butt.
- (Carol chuckling)
402
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:28,887
I knew there must be a
perfectly logical explanation.
403
00:15:28,928 --> 00:15:30,680
(chuckles)
And there it is.
404
00:15:30,722 --> 00:15:32,616
-TED: Hmm. -All that matters
is that you're here.
405
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:34,809
- TABITHA: Woo-hoo! Yay!
- (Tina squeals)
406
00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:36,287
- Absolutely. Uh, for now.
- (Tina giggling)
407
00:15:36,311 --> 00:15:38,271
Uncle Ted, please stay
for Christmas. Please.
408
00:15:38,313 --> 00:15:40,940
Sorry, sweetie. I can't
do Christmas on the 25th.
409
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,193
But, Uncle Ted,
I missed you so much.
410
00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:44,944
(echoing):
I missed you so much.
411
00:15:44,986 --> 00:15:46,613
- I missed you so much.
- Mm... wah!
412
00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,591
TABITHA: Don't you think
I'm a little old for that now?
413
00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:50,301
(echoing): Don't you think
I'm a little old for that now?
414
00:15:50,325 --> 00:15:51,969
Don't you think
I'm a little old for that now?
415
00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:53,995
(chuckles) Can I talk to you
in the kitchen?
416
00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:56,373
Alone.
417
00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:00,377
- TED: The baby, Tim?
- (shushes)
418
00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:03,046
She's been sent from up there.
419
00:16:03,088 --> 00:16:05,715
- Upstairs?
- That's right. BabyCorp.
420
00:16:05,757 --> 00:16:09,260
So you're saying the voice mail
was some kind of call for help.
421
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:11,262
Yes! No.
422
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:14,182
She comes from a secret
corporation run by babies.
423
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:18,144
Tim, I'm gonna give you
the name of a doctor.
424
00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:21,981
Roy Federman. Just tell him
I sent you, okay?
425
00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:23,233
(hushed):
What are they saying?
426
00:16:23,274 --> 00:16:24,734
We should give them
some privacy.
427
00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,027
- Here you go.
- Ooh. Thanks.
428
00:16:26,069 --> 00:16:27,362
TIM:
I'm not crazy!
429
00:16:27,404 --> 00:16:29,114
You just don't remember.
Tell him, Tina.
430
00:16:29,155 --> 00:16:30,466
- He... I...
- TED: She can't talk, Tim.
431
00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,158
- TIM: Stop interrupting.
- (Tina groans)
432
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,511
TED: Interrupting what?
I don't hear anything.
433
00:16:33,535 --> 00:16:35,662
Except your obnoxious voice.
You hear that.
434
00:16:35,704 --> 00:16:37,831
I have a beautiful voice.
435
00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,249
- (groans)
- TIM: Fine.
436
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:41,130
I can prove that
everything I'm saying is real.
437
00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,502
- TED: Oh, yeah?
- TIM: Yeah!
438
00:16:42,544 --> 00:16:43,503
Suck it, Ted.
439
00:16:43,545 --> 00:16:44,546
I beg your pardon?
440
00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:45,672
You, suck.
441
00:16:45,714 --> 00:16:47,132
No, no, Tim. You suck.
442
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:48,526
CAROL: Time to go buy
a Christmas tree.
443
00:16:48,550 --> 00:16:50,218
But we already have
a Christmas tree.
444
00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:52,429
- No, we don't. No, we don't.
- Yes, we do. Yes, we do.
445
00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:54,031
Suck it, suck it, suck it,
suck it, suck it, suck it.
446
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:55,574
- Get that pacie out of my face!
- Excuse me.
447
00:16:55,598 --> 00:16:58,685
I hate to interrupt,
but may I make a suggestion?
448
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,061
Why don't you both suck it?
449
00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:02,022
- Ha! (whoops)
- (grunts)
450
00:17:02,063 --> 00:17:03,815
(grunting)
451
00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:05,817
- She can talk.
- A lot.
452
00:17:05,859 --> 00:17:06,985
(whoops)
453
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:08,611
Buckle up, boys.
454
00:17:08,653 --> 00:17:10,238
(sucking rapidly)
455
00:17:11,072 --> 00:17:12,532
(all screaming)
456
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:14,868
- TINA: Baby on board!
- (Tim whooping)
457
00:17:14,909 --> 00:17:17,078
- That's what I'm talking about!
- (laughs) Woo-hoo!
458
00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:19,497
(screaming)
459
00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:22,042
(sighs)
460
00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:24,586
♪ ♪
461
00:17:31,885 --> 00:17:33,595
TIM:
Yeah! Woo-hoo!
462
00:17:34,763 --> 00:17:36,056
(both grunt)
463
00:17:36,097 --> 00:17:37,724
(yelps)
464
00:17:37,766 --> 00:17:39,768
- Wow.
- (Tina laughs)
465
00:17:39,809 --> 00:17:41,394
(gasps)
466
00:17:41,436 --> 00:17:42,729
I'm home.
467
00:17:42,771 --> 00:17:44,022
TIM:
Yeah. See?
468
00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:45,482
It's all real.
469
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:46,566
TED:
Whoa.
470
00:17:46,608 --> 00:17:48,735
Is that me?
471
00:17:48,777 --> 00:17:51,488
TINA: If you're fishing for
a compliment, you caught one!
472
00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:53,907
You are a legend in this joint.
473
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,408
A statue?
474
00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,952
Well, I did single-handedly
save the company.
475
00:17:57,994 --> 00:17:59,496
Double-handedly.
476
00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:00,931
(chuckling):
Right? We were partners.
477
00:18:00,955 --> 00:18:02,040
Really?
478
00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:03,750
I don't see your statue.
479
00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:05,377
I still love you, Daddy.
480
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,379
TIM:
They got the head size right.
481
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:08,672
(ding)
482
00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:10,924
TED: Take it from me,
you have to be aggressive
483
00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:12,217
if you want to get ahead.
484
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:13,927
Climb that corporate ladder
485
00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:16,596
-until you're the last baby
standing at the top. -TIM: Wow.
486
00:18:16,638 --> 00:18:19,557
Actually, I prioritize
a good work-life balance
487
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:23,103
and a positive environment
where my ideas are valued.
488
00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:25,271
(laughing)
489
00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:26,648
Oh, you're serious.
490
00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:28,525
You're funny, Uncle Ted.
491
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:30,777
I wonder why they didn't
mention that in your file.
492
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:31,945
My file?
493
00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:33,488
- You saw my file?
- (Tim sighs)
494
00:18:33,530 --> 00:18:34,781
- Yep.
- What does it say?
495
00:18:34,823 --> 00:18:36,116
It says a lot.
496
00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:38,535
- This is the Crisis Center.
- Whoa. Wow.
497
00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:41,037
This is where we monitor
all threats
498
00:18:41,079 --> 00:18:43,039
to babies around the world.
499
00:18:43,081 --> 00:18:44,332
And Hawaii.
500
00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:46,126
This is so cool.
This is so cool.
501
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:48,128
(roaring):
I'm Godzilla.
502
00:18:48,169 --> 00:18:49,689
"Oh, run for your lives!
Run for your lives!"
503
00:18:49,713 --> 00:18:52,048
- Why did we bring him?
- Daddy, get down from there.
504
00:18:52,090 --> 00:18:54,801
-Aw. -We can play on it later
when no one is looking.
505
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:56,511
- What's the crisis?
- Yeah.
506
00:18:56,553 --> 00:18:58,138
Here we go.
What's the crisis, sweetie?
507
00:18:58,179 --> 00:18:59,556
Rusty, roll it.
508
00:18:59,597 --> 00:19:01,474
(snores, whines)
509
00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:03,476
He's new.
510
00:19:03,518 --> 00:19:07,313
DR. ARMSTRONG (over speakers):
Just imagine, baby surgeons.
511
00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,649
- (buzzer sounds) -Uh-oh.
- (babies giggling)
512
00:19:09,691 --> 00:19:11,985
Or baby astronauts.
513
00:19:12,027 --> 00:19:15,155
(singsongy):
Floaty, floaty, float.
514
00:19:15,196 --> 00:19:18,491
Yes, babies are gonna
run the world one day.
515
00:19:18,533 --> 00:19:21,745
And that day is coming
sooner than you think.
516
00:19:21,786 --> 00:19:24,748
Hello. My name is
Dr. Erwin Armstrong,
517
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:27,334
founder of The Acorn Center
for Advanced Childhood.
518
00:19:27,375 --> 00:19:29,295
Wait a minute, that's...
that's Tabitha's school.
519
00:19:29,336 --> 00:19:31,671
Here at the center,
we believe babies
520
00:19:31,713 --> 00:19:34,299
are the ultimate
learning machines.
521
00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:36,259
Isn't that right, little Nathan?
522
00:19:36,301 --> 00:19:38,428
- Yeah!
- (chuckles): Okay.
523
00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:40,013
They should use
their precious time
524
00:19:40,055 --> 00:19:42,474
to develop faster, push harder.
525
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:43,909
- Hmm. -(Tim scoffs)
- Parents, they have the best
526
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:46,853
intentions, of course,
but they're not experts.
527
00:19:46,895 --> 00:19:50,982
After all, the only thing
holding your child back is...
528
00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:52,776
- you.
- KIDS: You!
529
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:55,487
This explains why Tabitha's
been pulling away from me.
530
00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:57,408
- It's the school.
- ARMSTRONG: Everybody, wave.
531
00:19:57,447 --> 00:19:58,990
- Bye, Mommy.
- KIDS: Bye, Mommy!
532
00:19:59,032 --> 00:20:00,241
- Bye, Daddy.
- Bye, Daddy!
533
00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,869
(singsongy):
Sayonara.
534
00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:04,954
Now, in the past six months,
535
00:20:04,996 --> 00:20:07,957
these schools have been
popping up all over the world.
536
00:20:07,999 --> 00:20:09,209
Uh, so what's the problem?
537
00:20:09,250 --> 00:20:10,877
The school is the problem.
538
00:20:10,919 --> 00:20:12,337
Yeah. School is evil.
539
00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:14,547
No, Daddy,
not all schools are evil.
540
00:20:14,589 --> 00:20:16,675
- It's just this one, okay?
- Okay.
541
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,802
If Armstrong's philosophy
keeps spreading,
542
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,970
it could be
the end of childhood.
543
00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:22,430
No.
544
00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:24,766
Childhood was the worst
three years of my life.
545
00:20:24,808 --> 00:20:26,351
That's so sad.
546
00:20:26,393 --> 00:20:28,228
You probably just
didn't do it right.
547
00:20:28,269 --> 00:20:29,521
- Huh?
- Aw.
548
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,773
But luckily, you get a do-over.
549
00:20:31,815 --> 00:20:33,983
A second chance.
550
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:38,655
BabyCorp has developed
a new super-duper baby formula
551
00:20:38,697 --> 00:20:41,574
-that can turn a grown-up
back into a baby. -(baby coos)
552
00:20:41,616 --> 00:20:43,910
We have it in cherry, grape,
orange and lime.
553
00:20:43,952 --> 00:20:45,704
- For real?
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
554
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,682
- You want me to be a baby?
- Hey, it's what you do best.
555
00:20:47,706 --> 00:20:49,791
So you can infiltrate
the school and find out
556
00:20:49,833 --> 00:20:52,502
what Dr. Armstrong
is really up to.
557
00:20:52,544 --> 00:20:55,088
BabyCorp will
take care of the rest.
558
00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:56,923
(whoops)
559
00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:58,591
(Tim gasps, laughs)
560
00:20:58,633 --> 00:21:00,593
It's the perfect disguise.
561
00:21:00,635 --> 00:21:03,555
And it only lasts
48 teensy-weensy hours.
562
00:21:03,596 --> 00:21:05,348
Oh, I am in on the mission.
563
00:21:05,390 --> 00:21:06,516
- Sorry, Pops.
- Ow.
564
00:21:06,558 --> 00:21:08,393
- It's not your mission.
- Aw.
565
00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:10,437
"Warning:
may cause drooling, babbling,
566
00:21:10,478 --> 00:21:12,272
"emotional outbursts,
fits of laughter,
567
00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:16,276
loss of bowel control,
chubby thighs"?
568
00:21:16,317 --> 00:21:19,112
I think some guys at my gym
take this stuff.
569
00:21:19,154 --> 00:21:20,238
(screams)
570
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,032
My texting hand!
571
00:21:22,073 --> 00:21:24,367
-Even though it is your
daughter's school. -(screaming)
572
00:21:24,409 --> 00:21:25,869
Doesn't seem fair, does it?
573
00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:27,370
Daddy, no. Please stop.
574
00:21:27,412 --> 00:21:28,788
(glugs) Whoa!
575
00:21:28,830 --> 00:21:30,498
(babbling rapidly)
576
00:21:30,540 --> 00:21:32,417
What? It actually works.
577
00:21:32,459 --> 00:21:33,626
(Ted straining)
578
00:21:33,668 --> 00:21:35,462
- TED: It's mine!
- (yells)
579
00:21:35,503 --> 00:21:37,297
-I'm better with
this kind of thing! -Oh!
580
00:21:37,339 --> 00:21:38,840
(glugs, screams)
581
00:21:38,882 --> 00:21:41,134
And what kind of thing is that,
Flock of Seagulls?
582
00:21:41,176 --> 00:21:42,969
- (both grunting)
- (record scratches)
583
00:21:43,011 --> 00:21:45,263
("The Time Warp" from RockyHorror Picture Show playing)
584
00:21:45,305 --> 00:21:46,806
- Everything!
- Gotcha!
585
00:21:46,848 --> 00:21:49,642
You might feel very emotional,
have some mood swings.
586
00:21:49,684 --> 00:21:50,935
- (glugging)
- (Ted yells)
587
00:21:50,977 --> 00:21:52,187
Oh! (babbles)
588
00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:53,730
Hey! (screams)
589
00:21:53,772 --> 00:21:56,024
Ouch.
There's the awkward stage.
590
00:21:56,066 --> 00:21:57,650
Now, the tea's hot, Connie.
591
00:21:57,692 --> 00:21:59,652
You always have to be
the hero, don't you?
592
00:21:59,694 --> 00:22:01,571
What's that supposed to mean?
(grunts)
593
00:22:01,613 --> 00:22:03,823
Never see him...
(frightened whimpering)
594
00:22:03,865 --> 00:22:05,825
All of a sudden,
he shows up with a pony.
595
00:22:05,867 --> 00:22:09,079
(screams) You're just jealous,
helmet head.
596
00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:10,497
She's my daughter!
597
00:22:10,538 --> 00:22:12,165
She's my niece. (screams)
598
00:22:12,207 --> 00:22:14,167
- (grunts)
- Do you want cream or sugar?
599
00:22:14,209 --> 00:22:15,710
(both yelling)
600
00:22:15,752 --> 00:22:17,712
I was always the successful one.
601
00:22:17,754 --> 00:22:20,340
Mommy says no running
in the house.
602
00:22:20,382 --> 00:22:21,591
(slurps) Mm.
603
00:22:21,633 --> 00:22:23,843
Hand over the bottle, mullet.
604
00:22:23,885 --> 00:22:25,637
(grunting)
605
00:22:25,679 --> 00:22:28,014
- (screams)
- You can't hug money, you know.
606
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:29,307
(glugs, babbles)
607
00:22:29,349 --> 00:22:30,725
(grunts)
608
00:22:31,685 --> 00:22:34,145
But you can, Tim. You can.
609
00:22:34,187 --> 00:22:37,148
(both yelling)
610
00:22:37,190 --> 00:22:39,067
Men. Am I right?
611
00:22:39,109 --> 00:22:42,112
(both yelling, grunting)
612
00:22:42,153 --> 00:22:44,030
(glugging)
613
00:22:44,072 --> 00:22:46,116
(slow-motion yelling)
614
00:22:46,157 --> 00:22:48,243
(screams, grunts)
615
00:22:48,284 --> 00:22:49,953
It's not personal.
616
00:22:49,994 --> 00:22:51,788
It's business, Leslie.
617
00:22:51,830 --> 00:22:52,872
(grunts)
618
00:22:52,914 --> 00:22:54,916
Well, it's personal
to me, Lindsey.
619
00:22:54,958 --> 00:22:57,585
(both scream)
620
00:22:57,627 --> 00:23:01,006
(both whimpering)
621
00:23:01,047 --> 00:23:02,882
Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
Ow, ow, ow!
622
00:23:02,924 --> 00:23:04,759
I'm sorry, Connie.
I have to cut this short.
623
00:23:04,801 --> 00:23:06,886
Tomorrow, we'll talk
about your problems.
624
00:23:06,928 --> 00:23:09,639
Okay, time-out!
This has gone far enough!
625
00:23:09,681 --> 00:23:11,224
TABITHA:
Hey. We're home.
626
00:23:11,266 --> 00:23:12,767
(grunts)
And we got another tree.
627
00:23:12,809 --> 00:23:14,019
A real one.
628
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,061
(all gasp)
629
00:23:15,103 --> 00:23:16,479
Um, upstairs now.
630
00:23:16,521 --> 00:23:17,897
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
631
00:23:17,939 --> 00:23:19,375
- (both grunting)
- CAROL: Push it. No, no, pull.
632
00:23:19,399 --> 00:23:20,501
- Go, go, go, go, go.
- Push it up.
633
00:23:20,525 --> 00:23:22,068
- (grunts, whoops)
- Pull. No, okay.
634
00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:24,154
- To the right.
- How come I have the heavy end?
635
00:23:24,195 --> 00:23:26,072
CAROL: Because you're young
and strong, honey.
636
00:23:26,114 --> 00:23:27,449
Little bit more.
637
00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:28,616
- Me first!
- (grunts)
638
00:23:28,658 --> 00:23:29,909
- CAROL: Come on.
- Get off.
639
00:23:29,951 --> 00:23:31,745
- Tim? Ted?
- Mom.
640
00:23:31,786 --> 00:23:33,121
Get the cord. Get the cord.
641
00:23:33,163 --> 00:23:34,432
Get the cord,
get the cord, get the cord!
642
00:23:34,456 --> 00:23:36,124
You just can't disappear.
643
00:23:36,166 --> 00:23:37,459
You need a cover story.
644
00:23:37,500 --> 00:23:38,960
- TED: Ow!
- Oh, right.
645
00:23:39,002 --> 00:23:40,086
My soft spot.
646
00:23:40,128 --> 00:23:41,254
CAROL:
Where are you guys?
647
00:23:41,296 --> 00:23:42,481
Uh, uh, tell her you're packing.
648
00:23:42,505 --> 00:23:45,300
We're upstairs, uh, packing.
649
00:23:45,342 --> 00:23:46,777
- Packing? For what?
- (Tabitha yells)
650
00:23:46,801 --> 00:23:48,521
Ooh. You're going on
a brother bonding trip.
651
00:23:48,553 --> 00:23:51,097
-We're going on
a brother bonding trip. -Ow!
652
00:23:51,139 --> 00:23:52,724
Now?
653
00:23:52,766 --> 00:23:54,410
But, Tim, your parents
are coming tomorrow.
654
00:23:54,434 --> 00:23:56,102
They can help out.
655
00:23:56,144 --> 00:23:57,979
Yeah, they could help out.
656
00:23:58,021 --> 00:24:00,899
What... No, you can't leave me
alone with your parents.
657
00:24:00,940 --> 00:24:02,567
- (Tina yells, laughs)
- Oh, Tina!
658
00:24:02,609 --> 00:24:05,236
(grunts)
What are you doing?
659
00:24:05,278 --> 00:24:06,738
(both grunting)
660
00:24:06,780 --> 00:24:08,948
All right, you know what?
You're going to baby jail.
661
00:24:08,990 --> 00:24:10,801
-Oh, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no! -Tabitha!
662
00:24:10,825 --> 00:24:12,303
- CAROL: Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
- TABITHA: A little help here.
663
00:24:12,327 --> 00:24:13,763
CAROL:
Honey, hold it up. Hold it up.
664
00:24:13,787 --> 00:24:15,467
(deep voice):
This is Ted Templeton, a man.
665
00:24:15,497 --> 00:24:17,183
You can go ahead and take off.
I have urgent family business.
666
00:24:17,207 --> 00:24:19,376
- CAROL: To the right, honey.
- Yes, I have a family.
667
00:24:19,417 --> 00:24:21,294
- Tim, I'm coming up there.
- (Tina gasps)
668
00:24:21,336 --> 00:24:23,254
Yeah, we need to talk.
669
00:24:23,296 --> 00:24:24,923
TABITHA:
Hey, Mom?
670
00:24:24,964 --> 00:24:26,132
Oh! Tina!
671
00:24:26,174 --> 00:24:27,550
(squeals, laughs)
672
00:24:27,592 --> 00:24:29,594
Put that down.
Put that down. Put that down.
673
00:24:29,636 --> 00:24:30,988
- Put that down. Put that down.
- Tina!
674
00:24:31,012 --> 00:24:33,807
- Put that down! Get back here!
- (laughing)
675
00:24:33,848 --> 00:24:36,309
Tina, stop! (grunting)
676
00:24:36,351 --> 00:24:38,436
CAROL:
What has gotten into you?
677
00:24:38,478 --> 00:24:40,146
- Time for us to go!
- (grunts)
678
00:24:40,188 --> 00:24:41,648
- What? Now?
- TED: Yeah.
679
00:24:41,690 --> 00:24:44,526
- My helicopter's double-parked.
- Bye!
680
00:24:44,567 --> 00:24:46,695
-Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
So soon? -Oh, no.
681
00:24:46,736 --> 00:24:48,822
- (both scream)
- (wind whistling)
682
00:24:48,863 --> 00:24:51,700
- (helicopter whirring)
- (panting)
683
00:24:53,118 --> 00:24:54,869
What... Did they really
just leave?
684
00:24:54,911 --> 00:24:55,995
Yep.
685
00:24:56,037 --> 00:24:57,872
- Hide!
- (Ted and Tim whimpering)
686
00:24:57,914 --> 00:25:00,917
(groans)
I got to lose this baby fat.
687
00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:02,544
(Carol sighs)
688
00:25:02,585 --> 00:25:04,671
Tina! What is your problem?
689
00:25:04,713 --> 00:25:06,840
(Tina laughing)
690
00:25:06,881 --> 00:25:08,925
♪ ♪
691
00:25:10,677 --> 00:25:12,429
CAROL: Now, you're gonna
wake up tomorrow
692
00:25:12,470 --> 00:25:14,055
and be good, Tina.
693
00:25:14,097 --> 00:25:15,390
No more devil baby.
694
00:25:15,432 --> 00:25:16,683
Deal?
695
00:25:16,725 --> 00:25:19,019
- (coos)
- Okay.
696
00:25:21,146 --> 00:25:23,064
(both gasping for air)
697
00:25:23,106 --> 00:25:24,232
(both scream)
698
00:25:24,274 --> 00:25:25,483
Ew.
699
00:25:25,525 --> 00:25:26,943
(both scream)
700
00:25:26,985 --> 00:25:29,195
-(chiming) -Thanks so much
for coming in, ladies.
701
00:25:29,237 --> 00:25:30,530
Would you like some fruit?
702
00:25:30,572 --> 00:25:31,573
Mm. Ow!
703
00:25:31,614 --> 00:25:32,574
What was... Hey!
704
00:25:32,615 --> 00:25:34,159
Uh, can we get on with this?
705
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:36,369
(grunts, groans)
706
00:25:36,411 --> 00:25:38,038
I miss my teeth.
707
00:25:38,079 --> 00:25:40,081
I've decided who's going
on the mission.
708
00:25:40,123 --> 00:25:41,332
Thank you. I accept.
709
00:25:41,374 --> 00:25:42,417
Both of you.
710
00:25:42,459 --> 00:25:43,960
- Yes!
- No.
711
00:25:44,002 --> 00:25:45,730
BabyCorp wants to get
the team back together, huh?
712
00:25:45,754 --> 00:25:46,838
(laughs):
No.
713
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,214
They think that's
a terrible idea.
714
00:25:48,256 --> 00:25:49,382
Of course they do.
715
00:25:49,424 --> 00:25:51,217
Well, I'm the boss, applesauce.
716
00:25:51,259 --> 00:25:54,220
And I think you two are better
together than you are apart.
717
00:25:54,262 --> 00:25:57,515
Well, I work alone...
Or at least not with him.
718
00:25:57,557 --> 00:25:59,559
Hey. There's no "I" in "team."
719
00:25:59,601 --> 00:26:01,561
Actually, there's no "U"
in "team," either,
720
00:26:01,603 --> 00:26:03,772
- but there is an "M-E."
- T-E-A-M...
721
00:26:03,813 --> 00:26:05,732
But teamwork doesn't seem work.
722
00:26:05,774 --> 00:26:08,109
Ah. If you want something
done right, do it yourself.
723
00:26:08,151 --> 00:26:10,653
- We're all in it together.
- Every man for himself.
724
00:26:10,695 --> 00:26:12,405
One is the loneliest number.
725
00:26:12,447 --> 00:26:14,282
- The ayes have it.
- We the people!
726
00:26:14,324 --> 00:26:16,159
Aha!
727
00:26:17,452 --> 00:26:18,745
Oh. So sorry.
728
00:26:18,787 --> 00:26:20,163
(whispers):
Okay. Good night.
729
00:26:20,205 --> 00:26:21,581
Whew.
730
00:26:21,623 --> 00:26:23,726
Guess we'll just have to
melt down your big old statue
731
00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:25,585
and turn it into
participation trophies.
732
00:26:25,627 --> 00:26:27,420
Please, no,
don't hurt my statue.
733
00:26:27,462 --> 00:26:30,507
Now, we have secret intel
734
00:26:30,548 --> 00:26:35,637
that Dr. Armstrong leaves his
office every morning at 11:15.
735
00:26:35,679 --> 00:26:37,138
You need to sneak in there,
736
00:26:37,180 --> 00:26:39,391
plant these
surveillance devices,
737
00:26:39,432 --> 00:26:41,434
and report back to me.
738
00:26:41,476 --> 00:26:42,560
Oh, man, this is so cool.
739
00:26:42,602 --> 00:26:43,746
(echoing over speaker):
Testing.
740
00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:45,105
♪ Strangers in the night... ♪
741
00:26:45,146 --> 00:26:47,607
Now, I've arranged
for a school bus
742
00:26:47,649 --> 00:26:49,943
to be here at 8:00 a.m. sharp!
743
00:26:49,984 --> 00:26:51,587
- Thank you, Connie.
- CONNIE: Nighty night.
744
00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:53,071
Do not be late.
745
00:26:53,113 --> 00:26:54,322
Got it.
746
00:26:54,364 --> 00:26:56,282
Easy-breezy, taco-peasy, boys.
747
00:26:56,324 --> 00:26:58,159
Let's get some sleep!
748
00:26:58,201 --> 00:27:00,120
(snoring)
749
00:27:04,290 --> 00:27:06,334
(coos softly)
750
00:27:08,461 --> 00:27:10,714
♪ ♪
751
00:27:20,015 --> 00:27:22,183
CAROL:
Hey, what's the matter?
752
00:27:23,685 --> 00:27:24,936
TABITHA:
It's nothing.
753
00:27:24,978 --> 00:27:26,312
CAROL:
Oh, sweetie, don't worry.
754
00:27:26,354 --> 00:27:27,647
I'm sure your dad will be back
755
00:27:27,689 --> 00:27:29,315
in time to see you
in the pageant.
756
00:27:29,357 --> 00:27:30,692
TABITHA:
That's okay.
757
00:27:30,734 --> 00:27:32,086
CAROL: What?
Don't you want him to come?
758
00:27:32,110 --> 00:27:34,654
- TABITHA: I guess.
- CAROL: Of course you do.
759
00:27:34,696 --> 00:27:36,614
Now, go back to sleep.
760
00:27:36,656 --> 00:27:38,033
TABITHA:
Good night, Mom.
761
00:27:38,074 --> 00:27:40,368
CAROL:
Good night, sweetie.
762
00:27:47,876 --> 00:27:49,919
(coos softly)
763
00:27:53,465 --> 00:27:55,717
♪ ♪
764
00:27:59,721 --> 00:28:01,181
CAROL:
Don't you want him to come?
765
00:28:01,222 --> 00:28:03,099
- TABITHA: I guess.
- (gasping)
766
00:28:03,141 --> 00:28:04,392
(screams)
767
00:28:04,434 --> 00:28:06,770
Don't you think I'm
a little old for that now?
768
00:28:06,811 --> 00:28:09,522
I think it's time
we both grow up.
769
00:28:09,564 --> 00:28:11,107
- (grunts)
- (thunder crashes)
770
00:28:11,149 --> 00:28:12,901
(gavel slamming)
771
00:28:14,069 --> 00:28:16,613
The trial of
Timothy Leslie Templeton
772
00:28:16,654 --> 00:28:18,031
is now in session.
773
00:28:18,073 --> 00:28:19,407
- Ha! Leslie.
- (laughter)
774
00:28:19,449 --> 00:28:21,534
Trial? Wait, what...
what are the charges?
775
00:28:21,576 --> 00:28:22,869
Fraud.
776
00:28:22,911 --> 00:28:25,538
Claiming to be
the world's best dad.
777
00:28:25,580 --> 00:28:26,998
- But I never said...
- Exhibit A.
778
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,209
- Oh, come on. That was a gift.
- (gallery gasping)
779
00:28:29,250 --> 00:28:32,253
I suggest you let
your attorney do the talking.
780
00:28:32,295 --> 00:28:34,422
(gasps) Oh, no.
781
00:28:34,464 --> 00:28:36,966
Back in my day, you had to
earn one of these babies.
782
00:28:37,008 --> 00:28:38,277
- Dad, what? I did not...
- (gallery gasping)
783
00:28:38,301 --> 00:28:41,054
His best friend was
an alarm clock.
784
00:28:41,096 --> 00:28:41,846
Mom.
785
00:28:41,888 --> 00:28:44,516
(groans) He broke my arm.
786
00:28:44,557 --> 00:28:46,059
No, I didn't!
It was my brother.
787
00:28:46,101 --> 00:28:47,227
Objection, Your Honor.
788
00:28:47,268 --> 00:28:48,687
Sustained.
789
00:28:48,728 --> 00:28:50,313
We the jury find
the defendant...
790
00:28:50,355 --> 00:28:51,815
ALL:
A failure!
791
00:28:51,856 --> 00:28:53,608
Tabitha, will you please
help me out?
792
00:28:53,650 --> 00:28:54,984
Whoa!
793
00:28:55,026 --> 00:28:57,404
Dad, the homework,
it's just too much.
794
00:28:57,445 --> 00:28:58,571
- Whoa!
- Tabitha!
795
00:28:58,613 --> 00:28:59,781
- Time's up.
- (alarm ringing)
796
00:28:59,823 --> 00:29:02,367
- Wait. No!
- Save me, Daddy! Save me!
797
00:29:02,409 --> 00:29:04,619
(screaming)
798
00:29:04,661 --> 00:29:06,204
(yells, gasps)
799
00:29:06,246 --> 00:29:07,747
(sighs)
800
00:29:07,789 --> 00:29:10,750
- Oh, man. That was crazy.
- (snoring)
801
00:29:10,792 --> 00:29:12,627
(both yelling)
802
00:29:12,669 --> 00:29:14,188
- We overslept! We overslept?
- (gasping)
803
00:29:14,212 --> 00:29:15,898
- We overslept.
- Wake up, little halflings!
804
00:29:15,922 --> 00:29:18,049
- Wake up! What year is it?
- (alarm ringing)
805
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:20,844
Oh, no.
806
00:29:20,885 --> 00:29:22,595
This is bad. No.
807
00:29:22,637 --> 00:29:24,264
No! No.
808
00:29:24,305 --> 00:29:25,598
(yells) Get up.
809
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:26,933
Get up. We got to go.
810
00:29:26,975 --> 00:29:28,810
Come on.
We're gonna be late for... Oh!
811
00:29:28,852 --> 00:29:30,103
I'm gonna email it to you.
812
00:29:30,145 --> 00:29:31,604
(grunts) What's going on?
813
00:29:31,646 --> 00:29:33,898
Ah, I forgot to set Wizzie
for daylight savings!
814
00:29:33,940 --> 00:29:36,943
- What?!
- Daylight can't be saved, Tim.
815
00:29:36,985 --> 00:29:39,237
Oh, I got to get the plant
and the bug we got to plant.
816
00:29:39,279 --> 00:29:41,132
- Grab whatever. We got to go.
- Don't panic. Do not panic.
817
00:29:41,156 --> 00:29:42,657
- Ow. (groans)
- Godspeed, boys.
818
00:29:42,699 --> 00:29:43,783
Let's roll.
819
00:29:43,825 --> 00:29:46,286
Whoa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa-oa...!
820
00:29:46,327 --> 00:29:48,413
(grunting)
821
00:29:49,748 --> 00:29:51,082
- (Tim screams)
- Upsies.
822
00:29:51,124 --> 00:29:53,543
- I need upsies...!
- Oh!
823
00:29:53,585 --> 00:29:54,961
- (Ted yells)
- TIM: Get dressed.
824
00:29:55,003 --> 00:29:57,714
(both grunting and groaning)
825
00:29:57,756 --> 00:29:59,341
What have you done to me?!
826
00:29:59,382 --> 00:30:01,301
No, really?
What, are we going sailing?
827
00:30:01,343 --> 00:30:03,470
Oh, no.
No, no, it's leaving.
828
00:30:03,511 --> 00:30:04,804
(both yell)
829
00:30:04,846 --> 00:30:06,723
(grunts, whimpers)
830
00:30:06,765 --> 00:30:08,141
Wait, no, no. Stop!
831
00:30:08,183 --> 00:30:10,310
Stop, stop, stop. Come back!
832
00:30:10,352 --> 00:30:11,478
Ahoy!
833
00:30:11,519 --> 00:30:12,812
Come back!
834
00:30:12,854 --> 00:30:14,564
(panting)
835
00:30:14,606 --> 00:30:16,024
Great, matey.
836
00:30:16,066 --> 00:30:17,609
What are we gonna do now?
837
00:30:18,777 --> 00:30:21,237
(whistling)
838
00:30:21,279 --> 00:30:23,365
♪ ♪
839
00:30:26,534 --> 00:30:28,578
(neighing)
840
00:30:33,541 --> 00:30:35,919
(slow-motion):
Oh, no!
841
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:37,921
(continues whistling)
842
00:30:38,713 --> 00:30:39,673
(whinnies)
843
00:30:39,714 --> 00:30:42,342
Precious, my noble steed.
844
00:30:42,384 --> 00:30:45,512
We must not be late
for our first day of school.
845
00:30:47,806 --> 00:30:49,641
Oh, gross.
846
00:30:49,683 --> 00:30:51,351
- Huh?
- (Tim screaming)
847
00:30:51,393 --> 00:30:53,687
Tallyho, Precious!
848
00:30:53,728 --> 00:30:56,022
(Tim continues screaming)
849
00:30:58,233 --> 00:30:59,818
This pony hates me. Oh!
850
00:30:59,859 --> 00:31:01,277
It's not that
she hates you, Tim.
851
00:31:01,319 --> 00:31:02,862
She just doesn't respect you.
852
00:31:02,904 --> 00:31:05,323
(Tim screams, whimpers)
853
00:31:05,365 --> 00:31:07,367
(horns honking)
854
00:31:07,409 --> 00:31:08,743
Go left! Go left!
855
00:31:08,785 --> 00:31:10,704
I'm gonna go
where navigation says.
856
00:31:10,745 --> 00:31:11,913
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Turn left.
857
00:31:11,955 --> 00:31:13,289
Thank you, navigation.
858
00:31:13,331 --> 00:31:14,934
- TIM: Whoa!
- AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn right.
859
00:31:14,958 --> 00:31:16,584
- (people screaming)
- TIM: Sorry.
860
00:31:16,626 --> 00:31:19,004
AUTOMATED VOICE: Turn left.
Proceed on the current route.
861
00:31:20,422 --> 00:31:22,090
TED:
Yeehaw!
862
00:31:22,132 --> 00:31:23,800
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
863
00:31:23,842 --> 00:31:25,635
Hold on to your holster.
864
00:31:25,677 --> 00:31:26,928
- Hyah!
- (yells)
865
00:31:26,970 --> 00:31:28,763
(cell phone buzzing)
866
00:31:28,805 --> 00:31:30,765
(grunts)
Oh, no. It's Carol!
867
00:31:30,807 --> 00:31:31,891
Don't answer it.
868
00:31:31,933 --> 00:31:33,059
- Hi.
- CAROL: Oh, Tim.
869
00:31:33,101 --> 00:31:34,310
How's your bonding trip?
870
00:31:34,352 --> 00:31:36,062
Uh... Whoa!
871
00:31:36,104 --> 00:31:37,397
Whoa. Slow down.
872
00:31:37,439 --> 00:31:40,191
How... is... your...
873
00:31:40,233 --> 00:31:42,110
- bonding trip?
- Aah! Whoa.
874
00:31:42,902 --> 00:31:44,738
(screams) You're here!
875
00:31:44,779 --> 00:31:46,698
- Oh, no.
- TIM: I mean, um,
876
00:31:46,740 --> 00:31:48,074
I wish you were here.
877
00:31:48,116 --> 00:31:49,325
Oh, we miss you, too.
878
00:31:49,367 --> 00:31:50,410
Don't we, girls?
879
00:31:50,452 --> 00:31:51,870
We're, uh...
880
00:31:51,911 --> 00:31:53,413
We're, uh, rebooting
our relationship
881
00:31:53,455 --> 00:31:55,498
and, uh, restoring the
closeness that we once felt.
882
00:31:55,540 --> 00:31:57,917
- That's so great.
- We've got to go. (chuckles)
883
00:31:57,959 --> 00:31:59,127
CAROL:
Where are you?
884
00:31:59,169 --> 00:32:00,587
- Uh, a hockey game.
- Hey!
885
00:32:00,628 --> 00:32:02,172
He shoots, he scores!
886
00:32:02,213 --> 00:32:03,465
He scores! He scores!
887
00:32:03,506 --> 00:32:05,091
Ladies and gentlemen, he scores!
888
00:32:05,133 --> 00:32:06,676
- ♪ Busted... ♪
- ♪ Busted... ♪
889
00:32:06,718 --> 00:32:07,844
- ♪ Busted. ♪
- (sirens wail)
890
00:32:07,886 --> 00:32:09,679
Is that the police?
891
00:32:10,764 --> 00:32:12,098
Uh, no, not the police.
892
00:32:12,140 --> 00:32:13,933
It's, uh...
it's a hockey alarm.
893
00:32:13,975 --> 00:32:15,143
Faster, Tim.
894
00:32:15,185 --> 00:32:16,895
I ain't going back to the clink!
895
00:32:16,936 --> 00:32:18,355
Now, I just wanted to remind you
896
00:32:18,396 --> 00:32:20,190
that Tabitha's pageant
is tomorrow night.
897
00:32:20,231 --> 00:32:22,025
You have to be there.
898
00:32:22,067 --> 00:32:25,779
Uh, I will be there
in one shape or another.
899
00:32:25,820 --> 00:32:26,946
(Ted grunts)
900
00:32:26,988 --> 00:32:29,115
- You promise?
- I promise.
901
00:32:29,157 --> 00:32:30,533
And what about Ted?
902
00:32:30,575 --> 00:32:31,951
Happy holidays, coppers.
903
00:32:31,993 --> 00:32:34,913
You're never gonna
take me alive, see?
904
00:32:34,954 --> 00:32:36,206
Uh, he's busy.
905
00:32:36,247 --> 00:32:37,957
What are you doing?
It's the cops.
906
00:32:37,999 --> 00:32:39,459
- (Ted laughs)
- Sorry, Officers.
907
00:32:39,501 --> 00:32:41,378
TED: Santa's got something
for everybody.
908
00:32:41,419 --> 00:32:42,462
TIM:
Sorry.
909
00:32:42,504 --> 00:32:44,589
♪ ♪
910
00:32:48,009 --> 00:32:49,153
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
911
00:32:49,177 --> 00:32:50,637
(Tim screams, Ted laughs)
912
00:32:50,679 --> 00:32:52,305
Oh, my God! It's so real!
913
00:32:52,347 --> 00:32:54,307
It's so real! It's so real!
914
00:32:54,349 --> 00:32:55,934
(Tim screaming over phone)
915
00:32:55,975 --> 00:32:57,769
- Tim?
- (Tabitha speaks Mandarin)
916
00:32:57,811 --> 00:32:58,937
(people screaming)
917
00:32:58,978 --> 00:32:59,896
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
918
00:32:59,938 --> 00:33:01,064
TIM:
Left! Left! Left!
919
00:33:01,106 --> 00:33:02,357
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
920
00:33:02,399 --> 00:33:03,709
TIM: Right, right,
right, right, right!
921
00:33:03,733 --> 00:33:05,110
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Recalculating.
922
00:33:05,151 --> 00:33:06,986
And now the moment
we've all waited for!
923
00:33:07,028 --> 00:33:09,364
(people screaming)
924
00:33:11,741 --> 00:33:13,052
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Proceed on the current route.
925
00:33:13,076 --> 00:33:14,202
- (screams)
- See, Tim?
926
00:33:14,244 --> 00:33:15,704
- (blowing)
- Always trust... Holy...
927
00:33:15,745 --> 00:33:17,122
- (Tim screaming)
- CAROL: Tim?
928
00:33:17,163 --> 00:33:18,415
TIM:
Uh, Carol?
929
00:33:18,456 --> 00:33:20,125
You're breaking up.
I'm losing you.
930
00:33:20,166 --> 00:33:21,584
No, honey, I can hear you fine.
931
00:33:21,626 --> 00:33:23,837
-See you at the pageant.
Got to go. Bye. -Okay.
932
00:33:23,878 --> 00:33:24,963
(yells)
933
00:33:25,005 --> 00:33:27,757
- (screams) Whoa!
- Sorry.
934
00:33:27,799 --> 00:33:29,175
(yells)
935
00:33:29,217 --> 00:33:30,260
(Jimbo whimpering)
936
00:33:30,301 --> 00:33:32,262
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
937
00:33:32,303 --> 00:33:34,681
- (screams)
- It's too real! It's too real!
938
00:33:34,723 --> 00:33:37,183
- (clamoring)
- (siren wailing)
939
00:33:37,225 --> 00:33:40,812
(screaming)
940
00:33:40,854 --> 00:33:43,898
TED:
Tallyho, Precious!
941
00:33:43,940 --> 00:33:45,191
(gasps)
942
00:33:46,151 --> 00:33:48,653
No, no, no, tally...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
943
00:33:48,695 --> 00:33:50,071
(whimpers)
944
00:33:51,197 --> 00:33:53,700
- (grunts)
- (tires screeching)
945
00:33:53,742 --> 00:33:54,868
- (grunts) Tina!
- Tina!
946
00:33:54,909 --> 00:33:56,053
- (Tim screaming)
- TED: Whoa!
947
00:33:56,077 --> 00:33:57,412
(laughs)
948
00:33:57,454 --> 00:33:59,539
- (screaming)
- TED: Woo-hoo!
949
00:33:59,581 --> 00:34:01,791
Whoa! (laughs)
950
00:34:01,833 --> 00:34:03,877
(Tim panting)
951
00:34:03,918 --> 00:34:05,670
- JIMBO: Tree!
- (siren whoops)
952
00:34:05,712 --> 00:34:07,690
AUTOMATED VOICE: You've arrived
at your destination.
953
00:34:07,714 --> 00:34:10,091
- And with a minute to spare.
- (distant explosion)
954
00:34:10,133 --> 00:34:12,844
Oh. Huh.
955
00:34:12,886 --> 00:34:14,012
I'll send them a check.
956
00:34:14,054 --> 00:34:15,138
(both chuckling)
957
00:34:15,180 --> 00:34:16,431
Oh, that was fun.
958
00:34:16,473 --> 00:34:17,891
You did it.
959
00:34:17,932 --> 00:34:19,225
We did it.
960
00:34:19,267 --> 00:34:20,977
I guess we did.
961
00:34:21,019 --> 00:34:22,812
I was talking about
me and Precious.
962
00:34:22,854 --> 00:34:24,814
- Oh.
- Isn't that right, baby?
963
00:34:24,856 --> 00:34:26,024
Yeah. Right.
964
00:34:26,066 --> 00:34:27,817
- Get down!
- (yells)
965
00:34:29,819 --> 00:34:32,113
♪ ♪
966
00:34:33,782 --> 00:34:35,825
(kids chattering)
967
00:34:42,457 --> 00:34:45,043
Whoa.
This place even looks evil.
968
00:34:45,085 --> 00:34:47,003
TED:
It's just a school.
969
00:34:47,045 --> 00:34:48,755
You're overreacting.
970
00:34:48,797 --> 00:34:50,006
And so is BabyCorp.
971
00:34:50,048 --> 00:34:51,299
No, I'm telling you,
972
00:34:51,341 --> 00:34:53,218
this school is stressing
Tabitha out.
973
00:34:53,259 --> 00:34:54,969
Tabitha can handle it.
974
00:34:55,011 --> 00:34:57,097
She's a real chip
off the old block.
975
00:34:57,138 --> 00:34:59,099
- Wait, who's the block?
- I'm the block.
976
00:34:59,140 --> 00:35:00,934
Well, you can't be the block.
I'm the block.
977
00:35:00,975 --> 00:35:02,435
Then start acting like a block.
978
00:35:02,477 --> 00:35:04,270
Wh-What does that mean?
I'm the block.
979
00:35:04,312 --> 00:35:06,165
- I've always been the block.
- Yeah. Not even close.
980
00:35:06,189 --> 00:35:07,607
TIM:
All I do is block.
981
00:35:07,649 --> 00:35:09,192
I wake up in the morning,
I block.
982
00:35:09,234 --> 00:35:11,069
- (kids grunting)
- I go to sleep, blocking.
983
00:35:11,111 --> 00:35:13,446
- I'm the block.
- Tim, enough.
984
00:35:14,406 --> 00:35:16,050
- I'm the block.
- No, you're not! Stop it!
985
00:35:16,074 --> 00:35:17,325
- Shh.
- (whistle blows)
986
00:35:17,367 --> 00:35:18,702
(chuckles) Sweet.
987
00:35:18,743 --> 00:35:20,161
Suckers.
988
00:35:20,203 --> 00:35:22,139
-AUTOMATED VOICE: Children only
beyond this point. -Hey.
989
00:35:22,163 --> 00:35:25,208
No crying is permitted
in the separation zone.
990
00:35:25,250 --> 00:35:26,793
Okay, looks like
we got to split up.
991
00:35:26,835 --> 00:35:28,253
Good. I could use a break.
992
00:35:28,294 --> 00:35:30,380
- TABITHA: Bye, Mom.
- All right, bye, honey.
993
00:35:30,422 --> 00:35:31,965
(gasps, yells)
There's Tabitha.
994
00:35:32,007 --> 00:35:34,342
- I'll see you after school.
- Okay.
995
00:35:34,384 --> 00:35:36,428
(window squeaking)
996
00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:39,139
TED:
Apparently, there's no "A"
997
00:35:39,180 --> 00:35:41,349
in "teamwork," either.
998
00:35:41,391 --> 00:35:42,851
All right, let's boogie.
999
00:35:42,892 --> 00:35:44,686
(grunts) Not so fast.
1000
00:35:44,728 --> 00:35:47,230
I'm blue. You're yellow.
1001
00:35:47,272 --> 00:35:49,858
(laughing): You're over there
in the choo-choo.
1002
00:35:49,899 --> 00:35:51,484
(raucous laughter)
1003
00:35:51,526 --> 00:35:53,945
Aw. It's full of babies.
1004
00:35:53,987 --> 00:35:55,363
Is it? I didn't notice.
1005
00:35:55,405 --> 00:35:57,824
(laughing):
Just kidding. It's hilarious.
1006
00:35:57,866 --> 00:35:59,451
Uh, wait. Your tie's crooked.
1007
00:35:59,492 --> 00:36:00,910
- (fingers snap)
- Okay, Tim, focus.
1008
00:36:00,952 --> 00:36:03,663
We'll meet outside
Armstrong's office at 11:15.
1009
00:36:03,705 --> 00:36:05,665
We'll sneak in,
and we'll plant the bugs.
1010
00:36:05,707 --> 00:36:06,833
Are you focused?
1011
00:36:06,875 --> 00:36:08,043
Hey, what the...
1012
00:36:08,084 --> 00:36:10,086
- Oh, I am focused, all right.
- No, no.
1013
00:36:10,128 --> 00:36:11,421
I'm not yellow. I'm blue.
1014
00:36:11,463 --> 00:36:13,506
11:30. Stick to the plan.
1015
00:36:13,548 --> 00:36:14,549
11:15.
1016
00:36:14,591 --> 00:36:16,551
15. Got it.
The block is focused.
1017
00:36:16,593 --> 00:36:19,387
- I'm blue! Aah! I'm blue.
- (babies laughing)
1018
00:36:20,347 --> 00:36:22,349
Don't you understand?
I'm blue!
1019
00:36:22,390 --> 00:36:24,351
ARMSTRONG (over speakers):
Welcome, children.
1020
00:36:24,392 --> 00:36:25,727
Willkommen.
1021
00:36:25,769 --> 00:36:27,187
Bienvenue.
1022
00:36:27,228 --> 00:36:28,355
Annyeonghaseyo.
1023
00:36:28,396 --> 00:36:30,231
And buenos días.
1024
00:36:30,273 --> 00:36:34,194
Thank you for choosing
to be excellent.
1025
00:36:34,235 --> 00:36:35,755
- Please don't touch me.
- (babies laughing)
1026
00:36:35,779 --> 00:36:38,114
This is some ridiculous mistake.
1027
00:36:38,156 --> 00:36:39,616
I'm blue! I'm blue!
1028
00:36:39,657 --> 00:36:41,368
♪ The wheels on the bus
go pi R-squared ♪
1029
00:36:41,409 --> 00:36:43,703
- ♪ Circumference all around. ♪
- Yes.
1030
00:36:46,915 --> 00:36:48,208
TIM:
Hello.
1031
00:36:48,249 --> 00:36:50,001
Uh, hello.
1032
00:36:50,043 --> 00:36:51,711
Nice plant.
1033
00:36:51,753 --> 00:36:54,214
This is
my emotional support plant.
1034
00:36:54,255 --> 00:36:56,049
Hi. I-I'm new here.
1035
00:36:56,091 --> 00:37:00,261
Said nihonium to the other
elements in the periodic table.
1036
00:37:00,303 --> 00:37:02,180
- Ooh.
- (laughter)
1037
00:37:02,222 --> 00:37:03,723
Okay.
1038
00:37:03,765 --> 00:37:05,392
Can't sit here.
1039
00:37:05,433 --> 00:37:07,227
Or here. Or there.
1040
00:37:07,268 --> 00:37:08,728
(yells)
1041
00:37:08,770 --> 00:37:12,524
Seating position is
determined by class rank.
1042
00:37:12,565 --> 00:37:14,651
We can't possibly
include your data,
1043
00:37:14,693 --> 00:37:17,070
given that the rigor
of your previous school
1044
00:37:17,112 --> 00:37:18,988
is an unknown variable.
1045
00:37:19,030 --> 00:37:20,240
- STUDENTS: Ooh.
- (laughs)
1046
00:37:20,281 --> 00:37:21,866
- Sick burn, Nathan.
- (grunts)
1047
00:37:21,908 --> 00:37:23,118
- (groans)
- Ow.
1048
00:37:23,159 --> 00:37:24,244
Here.
1049
00:37:24,285 --> 00:37:26,413
- You can take my seat.
- (sighs)
1050
00:37:26,454 --> 00:37:28,873
I'm so proud of you.
1051
00:37:28,915 --> 00:37:30,875
I mean... thanks.
1052
00:37:30,917 --> 00:37:32,377
Okay...
1053
00:37:32,419 --> 00:37:33,920
(school bell rings)
1054
00:37:33,962 --> 00:37:35,255
ARMSTRONG:
Good morning.
1055
00:37:35,296 --> 00:37:36,691
STUDENTS:
Good morning, Dr. Armstrong!
1056
00:37:36,715 --> 00:37:39,050
(chuckles)
Very warm welcome. Thank you.
1057
00:37:39,092 --> 00:37:40,385
Huh?
1058
00:37:40,427 --> 00:37:42,429
As you can see,
we've got a new colleague
1059
00:37:42,470 --> 00:37:44,222
joining us today.
1060
00:37:44,264 --> 00:37:45,724
- Ooh.
- Hello.
1061
00:37:45,765 --> 00:37:47,535
New colleague, why don't you
introduce yourself.
1062
00:37:47,559 --> 00:37:50,603
Uh, my name's Ti... um, Marcos.
1063
00:37:50,645 --> 00:37:53,023
- Hmm.
- Marcos Lightspeed.
1064
00:37:53,064 --> 00:37:55,608
Marcos Lightspeed.
1065
00:37:55,650 --> 00:37:58,194
Yeah. Colorful, characterful,
and I like it.
1066
00:37:58,236 --> 00:37:59,821
- In any case...
- (gasps)
1067
00:37:59,863 --> 00:38:02,449
- welcome, Marcos,
to Blue Unit. -(gasps)
1068
00:38:02,490 --> 00:38:04,242
Our most advanced class.
1069
00:38:04,284 --> 00:38:07,078
Ooh, this is rarefied air
1070
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:08,413
- we're breathing.
- (groans)
1071
00:38:08,455 --> 00:38:10,331
Here at The Acorn Center,
we believe
1072
00:38:10,373 --> 00:38:12,417
that all competition is...
1073
00:38:12,459 --> 00:38:14,961
STUDENTS:
Healthy competition.
1074
00:38:15,003 --> 00:38:17,422
(babies yelling, laughing)
1075
00:38:17,464 --> 00:38:19,841
(noisemakers blaring)
1076
00:38:23,511 --> 00:38:26,890
I'm trapped
in the dum-dum holding tank.
1077
00:38:26,931 --> 00:38:30,268
(gasps)
I'm having a panic attack.
1078
00:38:30,310 --> 00:38:32,687
There must be a way out of here.
1079
00:38:35,690 --> 00:38:37,817
Something doesn't smell right.
1080
00:38:37,859 --> 00:38:39,944
(sniffs) Blueberry.
1081
00:38:39,986 --> 00:38:41,696
(laughing)
1082
00:38:41,738 --> 00:38:43,907
(whispers):
I have to get out of here.
1083
00:38:43,948 --> 00:38:45,158
Hi.
1084
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:46,659
Don't look at me.
1085
00:38:46,701 --> 00:38:48,661
- Okay.
- (baby laughing)
1086
00:38:48,703 --> 00:38:50,955
And our first subject
today is...
1087
00:38:50,997 --> 00:38:53,083
No fractions, no fractions,
no fractions. Whoa!
1088
00:38:54,084 --> 00:38:55,835
Particle physics.
1089
00:38:55,877 --> 00:38:57,003
Yes! What?
1090
00:38:57,045 --> 00:38:58,129
Yes! (laughs)
1091
00:38:58,171 --> 00:38:59,631
Who knows which scientist
1092
00:38:59,673 --> 00:39:01,883
first theorized
that the universe has a limit
1093
00:39:01,925 --> 00:39:04,594
beyond which
the laws of physics break down?
1094
00:39:04,636 --> 00:39:06,179
(students clamoring)
1095
00:39:06,221 --> 00:39:07,931
Wow. Everybody seems to know.
1096
00:39:07,972 --> 00:39:11,434
- (sighs, gasps)
- Señor Lightspeed.
1097
00:39:11,476 --> 00:39:14,979
Um, Dr. Flam... baisley?
1098
00:39:15,021 --> 00:39:17,857
- (buzzer sounds)
- Oh, that's the wrong answer.
1099
00:39:17,899 --> 00:39:20,694
His brain sure doesn't move
at light speed.
1100
00:39:20,735 --> 00:39:21,861
(laughter)
1101
00:39:21,903 --> 00:39:23,488
- ARMSTRONG: Uh, okay.
- I know, right?
1102
00:39:23,530 --> 00:39:25,365
- Anybody else?
- Right here.
1103
00:39:25,407 --> 00:39:26,783
- Max Planck.
- (bell dings)
1104
00:39:26,825 --> 00:39:28,284
ARMSTRONG:
That's correct.
1105
00:39:28,326 --> 00:39:29,703
Tabitha has set the bar.
1106
00:39:29,744 --> 00:39:31,413
First one on the board.
Ding, ding, ding.
1107
00:39:31,454 --> 00:39:33,540
Way to go, Tabitha.
1108
00:39:33,581 --> 00:39:36,042
You're going down, Templeton.
1109
00:39:36,084 --> 00:39:37,502
Bring it on, Nathan.
1110
00:39:37,544 --> 00:39:38,712
Yeah, Tabitha. Get him.
1111
00:39:38,753 --> 00:39:41,256
ARMSTRONG:
Next subject.
1112
00:39:41,297 --> 00:39:42,882
Ancient Greek.
1113
00:39:42,924 --> 00:39:45,719
- STUDENTS: Opa!
- Oprah! (chuckles)
1114
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:47,887
- (laughter, babbling)
- Attention.
1115
00:39:47,929 --> 00:39:49,764
Attention, everyone.
1116
00:39:49,806 --> 00:39:52,475
Who wants to play Shawshank?
1117
00:39:52,517 --> 00:39:53,977
- No!
- BABIES: Huh?
1118
00:39:54,811 --> 00:39:57,981
Who wants to go outside
and play?
1119
00:39:58,023 --> 00:40:01,109
- (cheering)
- Does that sound fun? Good.
1120
00:40:01,151 --> 00:40:03,069
Now, anybody have any ideas?
1121
00:40:03,111 --> 00:40:04,404
- BABY: No!
- Come on, people.
1122
00:40:04,446 --> 00:40:05,548
Think, think, think,
think, think.
1123
00:40:05,572 --> 00:40:06,799
We need to think
outside the box.
1124
00:40:06,823 --> 00:40:08,259
- Oh, oh, oh! Me, me! Oh!
- You, Bo-Peep.
1125
00:40:08,283 --> 00:40:11,327
We can build a hot-air balloon
1126
00:40:11,369 --> 00:40:13,288
out of Popsicle sticks
and bubble gum!
1127
00:40:13,329 --> 00:40:14,622
(laughing)
1128
00:40:14,664 --> 00:40:16,332
And how would it fly?
1129
00:40:16,374 --> 00:40:18,251
- Pixie dust!
- (laughing, cheering)
1130
00:40:18,293 --> 00:40:19,794
Get back in the box, Bo-Peep.
1131
00:40:19,836 --> 00:40:22,088
- All the way in?
- All the way in.
1132
00:40:22,130 --> 00:40:24,299
-Yay! -Ooh. Uh, can we get
in the box, too?
1133
00:40:24,341 --> 00:40:26,343
- Can we? Can we?
- BABY: Glue.
1134
00:40:26,384 --> 00:40:28,303
I like glue.
1135
00:40:28,345 --> 00:40:29,512
Who doesn't?
1136
00:40:29,554 --> 00:40:30,972
But we're trying
to brainstorm here.
1137
00:40:31,014 --> 00:40:32,265
Glue's good.
1138
00:40:32,307 --> 00:40:33,975
(laughing wildly)
1139
00:40:34,017 --> 00:40:36,770
-Think, think, think, think,
think, think... -(groans)
1140
00:40:36,811 --> 00:40:39,939
think, think, think, think,
think, think, think, think!
1141
00:40:39,981 --> 00:40:41,441
Bingo.
1142
00:40:41,483 --> 00:40:42,776
Next subject.
1143
00:40:42,817 --> 00:40:45,445
X is equal
to the derivative of...
1144
00:40:45,487 --> 00:40:46,738
- NATHAN: Ooh, me!
- Itself.
1145
00:40:46,780 --> 00:40:48,406
ARMSTRONG:
Kudos for Tabitha.
1146
00:40:48,448 --> 00:40:49,908
Wow. You knew that?
1147
00:40:49,949 --> 00:40:53,244
The world's leading producer
of bauxite is...
1148
00:40:53,286 --> 00:40:54,746
- NATHAN: Oh!
- Australia.
1149
00:40:54,788 --> 00:40:56,140
ARMSTRONG: Once again,
Tabitha's on the board.
1150
00:40:56,164 --> 00:40:58,375
- Very good. -Yes, Tabitha!
- (applause)
1151
00:40:58,416 --> 00:41:00,001
We got 15 minutes, people.
1152
00:41:00,043 --> 00:41:02,170
The difference
in "try" and "triumph"
1153
00:41:02,212 --> 00:41:03,963
is just a little oomph.
1154
00:41:04,005 --> 00:41:07,092
- BABIES: Oomph!
- Go big or go home.
1155
00:41:07,133 --> 00:41:08,718
Okay. Going home.
1156
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:10,512
- Let's pick up the pace.
- No!
1157
00:41:10,553 --> 00:41:13,556
Hand downs, Norma Rae.
This is my time.
1158
00:41:13,598 --> 00:41:15,725
To be, or not to be?
Tabitha.
1159
00:41:15,767 --> 00:41:17,327
- To be. -That's correct.
- (bell dings)
1160
00:41:17,352 --> 00:41:21,314
Can anyone tell me
the horsepower of a 302 engine?
1161
00:41:21,356 --> 00:41:23,149
- Uh, seven?
- (buzzer sounds)
1162
00:41:23,191 --> 00:41:24,901
- ARMSTRONG: Oh, boy.
- Weak sauce, Nathan.
1163
00:41:24,943 --> 00:41:26,486
- That was weak.
- (groans)
1164
00:41:26,528 --> 00:41:27,755
Tabitha, do you have
an idea about that?
1165
00:41:27,779 --> 00:41:30,323
300 horsepower
with a four-barrel carb.
1166
00:41:30,365 --> 00:41:31,634
- (bell dings) -TIM: Wow.
- (groans)
1167
00:41:31,658 --> 00:41:33,493
- Her dad must be a genius.
- (applause)
1168
00:41:33,535 --> 00:41:36,037
On my signal, unleash heck.
1169
00:41:36,830 --> 00:41:38,957
- Fire!
- (babies grunt)
1170
00:41:39,958 --> 00:41:42,544
- (babies cheering)
- Yes!
1171
00:41:43,795 --> 00:41:45,880
- I found a cure!
- (cheering)
1172
00:41:45,922 --> 00:41:47,674
- (bell dings)
- Yes! Yes! She did it!
1173
00:41:47,716 --> 00:41:48,883
She did it.
1174
00:41:48,925 --> 00:41:50,510
- (students gasp)
- (buzzers sounding)
1175
00:41:50,552 --> 00:41:52,178
STUDENTS:
Marcos!
1176
00:41:52,220 --> 00:41:54,472
I did it. I did it.
1177
00:41:54,514 --> 00:41:56,349
(babies cheering)
1178
00:41:56,391 --> 00:42:00,270
Remember, your size doesn't
determine your strength.
1179
00:42:01,813 --> 00:42:04,190
Well, so far,
it's Tabitha number one
1180
00:42:04,232 --> 00:42:05,692
and everybody else last.
1181
00:42:05,734 --> 00:42:08,361
- (cheering, applause)
- (groans, sobs)
1182
00:42:08,403 --> 00:42:10,989
♪ ♪
1183
00:42:15,243 --> 00:42:16,411
Psst. Hey, Tabitha.
1184
00:42:16,453 --> 00:42:17,662
You're really...
1185
00:42:17,704 --> 00:42:20,290
- A geek. I know.
- No.
1186
00:42:20,331 --> 00:42:22,208
You're amazing.
1187
00:42:22,250 --> 00:42:24,544
Oh. Thanks, Marcos.
1188
00:42:24,586 --> 00:42:28,048
You'll be singing
a different tune at rehearsal.
1189
00:42:28,089 --> 00:42:30,133
The wrong tune.
1190
00:42:30,175 --> 00:42:31,343
(both laughing)
1191
00:42:31,384 --> 00:42:32,635
You're so funny.
1192
00:42:32,677 --> 00:42:34,346
Hilarious!
1193
00:42:36,931 --> 00:42:39,392
And yeah, Templeton,
don't be late.
1194
00:42:39,434 --> 00:42:41,102
- (laughs)
- (gasps) Late.
1195
00:42:41,144 --> 00:42:43,229
- I'm late.
- ARMSTRONG: Next subject.
1196
00:42:43,271 --> 00:42:44,439
Yes!
1197
00:42:44,481 --> 00:42:46,399
(straining):
Just a little further.
1198
00:42:46,441 --> 00:42:49,527
(babies giggling, babbling)
1199
00:42:49,569 --> 00:42:50,737
Glue!
1200
00:42:50,779 --> 00:42:52,572
(yells, screams)
1201
00:42:52,614 --> 00:42:53,758
- TIM: Excuse me.
- (engine revving)
1202
00:42:53,782 --> 00:42:55,033
Yes, Marcos.
1203
00:42:55,075 --> 00:42:57,869
Can I have a hall pass?
I have to go.
1204
00:42:57,911 --> 00:43:00,413
ARMSTRONG:
Voilà. Feel free.
1205
00:43:00,455 --> 00:43:02,082
(scoffs) Now what?
1206
00:43:02,123 --> 00:43:03,875
- (grunts) Now what?
- (babies crying)
1207
00:43:03,917 --> 00:43:05,502
Glue!
1208
00:43:05,543 --> 00:43:07,379
Glue is bad!
1209
00:43:07,420 --> 00:43:09,089
(whimpering)
1210
00:43:09,130 --> 00:43:10,256
Glue.
1211
00:43:10,298 --> 00:43:12,717
(gasps)
Glue is good.
1212
00:43:12,759 --> 00:43:16,096
How to get to
the principal's office.
1213
00:43:16,137 --> 00:43:17,597
Of course.
1214
00:43:17,639 --> 00:43:20,517
You get sent
to the principal's office.
1215
00:43:20,558 --> 00:43:22,686
("It's Tricky" by Run-D.M.C.
playing)
1216
00:43:22,727 --> 00:43:25,021
- Booyah!
- (students gasp)
1217
00:43:25,063 --> 00:43:28,066
♪ I think it's very vital
to rock a rhyme... ♪
1218
00:43:28,108 --> 00:43:30,110
♪ Here we go, it's tricky
to rock a rhyme ♪
1219
00:43:30,151 --> 00:43:34,030
♪ To rock a rhyme that's right
on time, it's tricky ♪
1220
00:43:34,072 --> 00:43:36,366
♪ It's tricky, tricky,
tricky, tricky ♪
1221
00:43:36,408 --> 00:43:38,076
♪ It's tricky to rock a rhyme ♪
1222
00:43:38,118 --> 00:43:40,620
♪ To rock a rhyme that's right
on time, it's tricky... ♪
1223
00:43:40,662 --> 00:43:42,455
What's up, y'all?
1224
00:43:42,497 --> 00:43:44,541
School is...
1225
00:43:44,582 --> 00:43:46,084
- stupid.
- (students gasp)
1226
00:43:46,126 --> 00:43:48,837
(staticky): Listen, you know,
I acknowledge your anger.
1227
00:43:48,878 --> 00:43:51,631
It's, uh, very, uh, feisty,
but please sit down.
1228
00:43:51,673 --> 00:43:54,342
- Okay. Uh, no.
- (students gasp)
1229
00:43:54,384 --> 00:43:57,137
Sitting is... stupid!
1230
00:43:57,178 --> 00:43:59,639
- He's such a bad boy.
- STUDENTS: Ooh.
1231
00:43:59,681 --> 00:44:01,891
(speaking indistinctly
through static)
1232
00:44:01,933 --> 00:44:03,852
♪ It's tricky to rock a rhyme ♪
1233
00:44:03,893 --> 00:44:06,479
♪ To rock a rhyme that's right
on time, it's tricky ♪
1234
00:44:06,521 --> 00:44:08,982
- ♪ How is it, D? ♪
- ♪ It's tricky, tricky... ♪
1235
00:44:09,024 --> 00:44:12,235
All right. I'm afraid you can't
disrupt class any longer.
1236
00:44:12,277 --> 00:44:16,031
Oh, no. Are we gonna have
a talk in your office?
1237
00:44:16,072 --> 00:44:17,657
No.
1238
00:44:17,699 --> 00:44:19,844
- You are gonna have a time-out.
- STUDENTS (gasping): The Box?
1239
00:44:19,868 --> 00:44:21,828
- He's going in the Box.
- (murmuring)
1240
00:44:21,870 --> 00:44:24,330
No, the Box makes you crazy.
1241
00:44:24,372 --> 00:44:25,832
The Box?
1242
00:44:25,874 --> 00:44:29,502
♪ Sail away,
sail away, sail away ♪
1243
00:44:29,544 --> 00:44:32,339
(groans)
♪ Sail away, sail away ♪
1244
00:44:32,380 --> 00:44:33,798
- ♪ Sail away... ♪
- (grunts)
1245
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:36,051
- ARMSTRONG: Sayonara, Marcos.
- (gasps)
1246
00:44:36,092 --> 00:44:38,636
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Your time-out begins now.
1247
00:44:38,678 --> 00:44:40,013
Relax.
1248
00:44:40,055 --> 00:44:42,182
- Wait!
- (music stops)
1249
00:44:42,223 --> 00:44:44,559
(child crying)
1250
00:44:44,601 --> 00:44:46,269
ROBOT VOICE:
Don't cry.
1251
00:44:46,311 --> 00:44:48,188
There, there. All better.
1252
00:44:48,229 --> 00:44:50,523
(Ted grunting)
1253
00:44:50,565 --> 00:44:51,691
(muffled grunting)
1254
00:44:51,733 --> 00:44:53,735
(yells, mumbles)
1255
00:44:53,777 --> 00:44:56,863
(grunting, spitting)
1256
00:44:57,697 --> 00:45:00,283
(sighs)
It's like they always say:
1257
00:45:00,325 --> 00:45:02,160
If you want something
done right,
1258
00:45:02,202 --> 00:45:04,871
you have to do it
without your brother!
1259
00:45:05,747 --> 00:45:08,833
We meet again, doorknob.
1260
00:45:10,377 --> 00:45:12,212
(grunting)
1261
00:45:12,253 --> 00:45:13,880
(door creaking)
1262
00:45:14,673 --> 00:45:16,341
ARMSTRONG:
Hello.
1263
00:45:16,383 --> 00:45:17,842
Welcome, welcome.
1264
00:45:17,884 --> 00:45:19,761
Please come in. Entrez vous?
1265
00:45:19,803 --> 00:45:21,221
You're here.
1266
00:45:21,262 --> 00:45:22,764
Oh, yes. I...
1267
00:45:22,806 --> 00:45:24,974
I was expecting you.
1268
00:45:25,809 --> 00:45:27,894
I... (grunts, yells)
1269
00:45:27,936 --> 00:45:28,895
(button beeps)
1270
00:45:28,937 --> 00:45:31,231
I expected that you
1271
00:45:31,272 --> 00:45:34,317
would be expecting me, so there.
1272
00:45:34,359 --> 00:45:37,862
Oh, and, uh, by the way,
I know why you're here,
1273
00:45:37,904 --> 00:45:39,906
- so, uh... so there.
- (button beeps)
1274
00:45:39,948 --> 00:45:42,742
(chuckles) You do?
1275
00:45:42,784 --> 00:45:45,036
- Mm-hmm. Yes, I do.
- (button beeps)
1276
00:45:45,078 --> 00:45:46,746
- (whirring)
- Have a seat, please.
1277
00:45:46,788 --> 00:45:48,164
(grunts) Thank you.
1278
00:45:48,206 --> 00:45:49,874
- You know what you are?
- Mm?
1279
00:45:49,916 --> 00:45:54,254
You are, if I may,
extremely intelligent.
1280
00:45:54,295 --> 00:45:55,755
Go on. (grunts)
1281
00:45:55,797 --> 00:45:57,400
Uh, as a matter of fact,
I've been observing you.
1282
00:45:57,424 --> 00:45:58,550
(button beeps)
1283
00:45:58,591 --> 00:46:00,510
Spends time wisely. Check.
1284
00:46:00,552 --> 00:46:03,179
Makes good use of
classroom materials. Check.
1285
00:46:03,221 --> 00:46:05,765
Keeps hands to self. Check.
1286
00:46:05,807 --> 00:46:07,308
Hey, forget
"works well with others."
1287
00:46:07,350 --> 00:46:10,437
You make others
work well for you.
1288
00:46:10,478 --> 00:46:13,857
That's literally the title
of the book I'm working on.
1289
00:46:13,898 --> 00:46:16,109
No kidding.
You had no business
1290
00:46:16,151 --> 00:46:18,236
being in Yellow Level, did you?
1291
00:46:18,278 --> 00:46:20,613
- It was sabotage.
- Sabotage. Exactly.
1292
00:46:20,655 --> 00:46:23,199
Jealousy, fear. Hey, I faced
the same obstacles.
1293
00:46:23,241 --> 00:46:26,828
In fact, you know,
you remind me a lot of myself
1294
00:46:26,870 --> 00:46:29,289
when I was your age,
1295
00:46:29,330 --> 00:46:32,125
which is now.
1296
00:46:32,167 --> 00:46:33,585
(grunts)
1297
00:46:35,545 --> 00:46:36,629
What?
1298
00:46:36,671 --> 00:46:37,964
(laughs)
1299
00:46:38,006 --> 00:46:41,301
Surprise, surprise.
1300
00:46:41,343 --> 00:46:43,803
What the frittata?
1301
00:46:43,845 --> 00:46:44,929
Well put.
1302
00:46:44,971 --> 00:46:47,390
He's a ba... You're a baby.
1303
00:46:47,432 --> 00:46:49,976
I repeat, you're a baby.
1304
00:46:50,018 --> 00:46:52,479
So surprised,
you said it twice. (chuckles)
1305
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:53,980
(laughs)
1306
00:46:54,022 --> 00:46:57,484
Unfortunately, people are, uh,
not ready for a...
1307
00:46:57,525 --> 00:46:59,736
a baby in a position of power.
1308
00:46:59,778 --> 00:47:01,279
Yet.
1309
00:47:01,321 --> 00:47:03,990
Remind me to get the number
of your muttonchop guy.
1310
00:47:04,032 --> 00:47:06,826
You know, I could use
somebody like you.
1311
00:47:06,868 --> 00:47:10,789
With a superior intelligence
like my own.
1312
00:47:10,830 --> 00:47:13,500
- Uh... really?
- Mmm.
1313
00:47:13,541 --> 00:47:14,918
Somebody who can, uh...
1314
00:47:14,959 --> 00:47:17,087
Mmm. (crunching)
1315
00:47:17,128 --> 00:47:18,505
- Mmm. Yeah.
- (gasps)
1316
00:47:18,546 --> 00:47:21,257
Truly comprehend
what I'm trying to accomplish.
1317
00:47:21,299 --> 00:47:24,010
- Well, you're looking at him.
- Bingo.
1318
00:47:24,052 --> 00:47:26,221
Mmm. We have a secret level.
1319
00:47:26,262 --> 00:47:27,889
Mmm.
For very special babies.
1320
00:47:27,931 --> 00:47:29,391
Mmm. The best of the best.
1321
00:47:29,432 --> 00:47:30,642
Ah. The elite.
1322
00:47:30,684 --> 00:47:31,685
Beyond blue?
1323
00:47:31,726 --> 00:47:33,728
Oh, yeah. Way beyond.
1324
00:47:33,770 --> 00:47:35,730
Way beyond. Ooh.
1325
00:47:35,772 --> 00:47:37,857
Mmm. There's a meeting today...
1326
00:47:37,899 --> 00:47:39,609
(slurps)
after school.
1327
00:47:39,651 --> 00:47:41,152
Babies only.
1328
00:47:41,194 --> 00:47:44,030
We may be small, but we're
about to teach grown-ups
1329
00:47:44,072 --> 00:47:46,408
a big lesson.
1330
00:47:47,784 --> 00:47:49,703
Mmm. Lolly?
1331
00:47:49,744 --> 00:47:51,037
- Okay.
- (school bell ringing)
1332
00:47:51,079 --> 00:47:52,580
Oh. Time for recess.
1333
00:47:52,622 --> 00:47:54,082
- Bye-bye.
- (button beeps)
1334
00:47:54,791 --> 00:47:56,835
(singsongy):
Sayonara...
1335
00:47:56,876 --> 00:47:58,420
(groans)
1336
00:47:59,462 --> 00:48:01,214
(grunts)
1337
00:48:01,256 --> 00:48:03,466
Well, I think that went well.
1338
00:48:04,592 --> 00:48:06,392
- TED (recorded): You're a baby.
- TINA: What?
1339
00:48:06,428 --> 00:48:08,430
- I repeat, you're a baby.
- (scoffs)
1340
00:48:08,471 --> 00:48:10,640
Is he talking to me?
He better not be talking to me,
1341
00:48:10,682 --> 00:48:12,142
because I'll... Armstrong?
1342
00:48:12,183 --> 00:48:13,893
(chuckles)
You're right, Connie.
1343
00:48:13,935 --> 00:48:15,437
He's talking about Armstrong.
1344
00:48:15,478 --> 00:48:17,248
-I don't know what has
gotten into her. -(gasps)
1345
00:48:17,272 --> 00:48:20,900
-But she's acting strange,
Dr. Federman. -(laughing)
1346
00:48:20,942 --> 00:48:23,153
Isn't it a bit early
for terrible twos?
1347
00:48:23,194 --> 00:48:25,030
Is there terrible ones?
Is that a thing?
1348
00:48:25,071 --> 00:48:26,573
Oh, piano-playing bunny,
you slay me.
1349
00:48:26,614 --> 00:48:28,158
Okey dokey.
1350
00:48:28,199 --> 00:48:32,495
We need some eyes on the prize,
visual confirmation here.
1351
00:48:32,537 --> 00:48:33,788
(snoring)
1352
00:48:33,830 --> 00:48:36,041
Oh, Daddy.
1353
00:48:36,082 --> 00:48:38,126
If I were there,
I'd pinch you so hard.
1354
00:48:38,168 --> 00:48:40,003
(sleepily):
♪ Sail away, sail away... ♪
1355
00:48:40,045 --> 00:48:41,838
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Your time-out has concluded.
1356
00:48:41,880 --> 00:48:43,757
Sail away! What time is it?
1357
00:48:43,798 --> 00:48:45,467
AUTOMATED VOICE:
It is time for recess.
1358
00:48:45,508 --> 00:48:47,510
I'm late, I'm late,
I'm late, I'm late. Come on.
1359
00:48:47,552 --> 00:48:49,512
(chuckling):
He'll understand, right?
1360
00:48:49,554 --> 00:48:51,348
(gasps) Okay.
Where is he? Where is he?
1361
00:48:51,389 --> 00:48:54,726
- Where is he? Uh...
- (kids chattering, whooping)
1362
00:48:54,768 --> 00:48:56,686
- Oomph! Yeah, baby!
- (cheering)
1363
00:48:56,728 --> 00:48:58,271
No, not my bows.
1364
00:48:58,313 --> 00:49:01,649
-But they're not your bows...
anymore. -(sobbing)
1365
00:49:01,691 --> 00:49:04,652
Yep, where there's crying,
there's my brother.
1366
00:49:06,279 --> 00:49:09,449
(playing "May" from
The Shawshank Redemption)
1367
00:49:09,491 --> 00:49:11,659
BABY (whispers):
Psst. Here you go.
1368
00:49:11,701 --> 00:49:13,244
BABY 2:
Cool.
1369
00:49:13,995 --> 00:49:16,331
(grunting):
Glue. Glue. Glue.
1370
00:49:19,250 --> 00:49:21,002
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, blue.
- Whoa!
1371
00:49:21,044 --> 00:49:22,796
Where do you think
youse going? You lost?
1372
00:49:22,837 --> 00:49:23,797
Could you let me through,
please?
1373
00:49:23,838 --> 00:49:25,256
No!
1374
00:49:25,298 --> 00:49:27,967
So, what, did you flunk
coloring class, kid?
1375
00:49:28,009 --> 00:49:29,594
- (laughter)
- Really, guy?
1376
00:49:30,553 --> 00:49:32,305
Mmm, cherry.
1377
00:49:32,347 --> 00:49:33,306
Go on.
1378
00:49:33,348 --> 00:49:34,700
- Blues on the other side.
- (groans)
1379
00:49:34,724 --> 00:49:36,017
TED:
Let him through.
1380
00:49:36,059 --> 00:49:37,143
Okay, he's cool.
1381
00:49:37,185 --> 00:49:38,561
TIM:
See? I'm cool.
1382
00:49:38,603 --> 00:49:39,813
I'm cool.
1383
00:49:39,854 --> 00:49:41,648
You failed me, Tim.
1384
00:49:41,690 --> 00:49:43,108
I was desperate.
1385
00:49:43,149 --> 00:49:45,819
I crawled.
I did things with glue
1386
00:49:45,860 --> 00:49:48,238
that I'm not proud of,
but I made it.
1387
00:49:48,279 --> 00:49:50,198
I made it all the way
to Armstrong's office,
1388
00:49:50,240 --> 00:49:52,200
and then where's Tim?
1389
00:49:52,242 --> 00:49:53,410
- I know. I...
- Where's Tim?
1390
00:49:53,451 --> 00:49:55,161
- I tried to...
- Where's Tim?!
1391
00:49:55,203 --> 00:49:57,038
- I was in the Box, okay?
- (babies gasping)
1392
00:49:57,080 --> 00:49:58,289
- TED: The Box?
- The Box?
1393
00:49:58,331 --> 00:49:59,165
Glue.
1394
00:49:59,207 --> 00:50:00,709
Yeah, that's right.
1395
00:50:00,750 --> 00:50:01,960
(whispers):
The Box.
1396
00:50:02,002 --> 00:50:03,336
Show a little respect.
1397
00:50:03,378 --> 00:50:06,256
See, Tim, this is why
I work alone.
1398
00:50:06,297 --> 00:50:08,842
- (sighs)
- I'll succeed in the mission.
1399
00:50:08,883 --> 00:50:10,385
You can take the pony home.
1400
00:50:10,427 --> 00:50:12,762
The only thing
you're ever gonna succeed at
1401
00:50:12,804 --> 00:50:13,805
is being alone.
1402
00:50:13,847 --> 00:50:15,015
- Fine.
- Fine!
1403
00:50:15,056 --> 00:50:16,516
Fine!
1404
00:50:16,558 --> 00:50:18,018
I like ponies.
1405
00:50:18,059 --> 00:50:20,395
Aah! Thank you for sharing.
1406
00:50:20,437 --> 00:50:22,731
(piano playing gentle tune)
1407
00:50:25,567 --> 00:50:27,420
- (Nathan groans in frustration)
- (piano plays discordant notes)
1408
00:50:27,444 --> 00:50:29,029
NATHAN:
You are blowing it, Templeton!
1409
00:50:29,070 --> 00:50:30,196
MEGHAN:
Yeah, Templeton.
1410
00:50:30,238 --> 00:50:31,614
TABITHA:
I'm trying.
1411
00:50:31,656 --> 00:50:34,284
NATHAN: Ugh! You always
come in a beat late.
1412
00:50:34,325 --> 00:50:36,786
I'm sorry, Nathan.
I'm doing my best.
1413
00:50:36,828 --> 00:50:40,707
Your best is going to keep me
out of going to Juilliard.
1414
00:50:40,749 --> 00:50:42,667
- Yeah, Templeton.
- It's one, two, three
1415
00:50:42,709 --> 00:50:45,086
- and one, two, three.
- MEGHAN: One, two, three.
1416
00:50:45,128 --> 00:50:46,605
NATHAN and MEGHAN:
And one, two, three
1417
00:50:46,629 --> 00:50:49,382
and one, two, three
and one, two, three.
1418
00:50:49,424 --> 00:50:52,719
- And one, two...
- Oh, come on!
1419
00:50:52,761 --> 00:50:54,054
Are you kidding me?
1420
00:50:54,095 --> 00:50:55,722
I just can't do it
right now, okay?
1421
00:50:55,764 --> 00:50:57,182
I can't. I just can't.
1422
00:50:57,223 --> 00:50:59,351
- I'll do it tomorrow.
- MEGHAN: Seriously?
1423
00:50:59,392 --> 00:51:01,227
- (school bell rings)
- (kids cheering)
1424
00:51:01,269 --> 00:51:03,480
NATHAN: All right,
all right, all right.
1425
00:51:03,521 --> 00:51:05,899
See you at the pageant tomorrow.
1426
00:51:05,940 --> 00:51:07,859
Beat it!
1427
00:51:12,489 --> 00:51:15,658
MEGHAN: Oh, Nathan,
Nathan, let me do it.
1428
00:51:15,700 --> 00:51:17,035
Let me do it, Nathan.
1429
00:51:17,077 --> 00:51:18,578
I want to sing the song.
1430
00:51:18,620 --> 00:51:19,913
No.
1431
00:51:19,954 --> 00:51:21,873
I want to see her fail.
1432
00:51:21,915 --> 00:51:23,583
Oh.
1433
00:51:23,625 --> 00:51:25,210
Pure genius.
1434
00:51:25,251 --> 00:51:27,420
- (laughing)
- (plays ominous chords)
1435
00:51:27,462 --> 00:51:29,089
NATHAN:
I can't wait.
1436
00:51:29,130 --> 00:51:30,650
- We'll see about that.
- (school bell ringing)
1437
00:51:30,674 --> 00:51:32,592
ARMSTRONG (over speaker):
Goodbye, children.
1438
00:51:32,634 --> 00:51:33,760
Sayonara.
1439
00:51:33,802 --> 00:51:35,095
Auf Wiedersehen.
1440
00:51:35,136 --> 00:51:36,262
Adieu.
1441
00:51:36,304 --> 00:51:38,223
Adios, niños.
1442
00:51:38,264 --> 00:51:39,766
(students chattering)
1443
00:51:39,808 --> 00:51:41,267
- (sighs)
- (horse neighs)
1444
00:51:41,309 --> 00:51:42,894
(Tim gasps)
1445
00:51:42,936 --> 00:51:44,270
Oh, come on.
1446
00:51:45,146 --> 00:51:46,356
(yells)
1447
00:51:47,482 --> 00:51:48,858
(yelps)
1448
00:51:48,900 --> 00:51:51,277
Oh, my gosh.
1449
00:51:51,319 --> 00:51:54,739
- Stop what you're doing.
- (chatter stops)
1450
00:51:54,781 --> 00:51:56,116
I see a baby pony.
1451
00:51:56,157 --> 00:51:57,951
- (screaming)
- (excited chatter)
1452
00:51:57,992 --> 00:51:59,494
I like ponies.
1453
00:51:59,536 --> 00:52:00,787
STUDENT:
Oh, over there!
1454
00:52:00,829 --> 00:52:01,955
- Yes!
- (laughter)
1455
00:52:01,996 --> 00:52:04,124
It's so cute!
1456
00:52:04,165 --> 00:52:05,917
(excited chatter)
1457
00:52:05,959 --> 00:52:08,336
(horn honks)
1458
00:52:12,215 --> 00:52:14,009
That's it? No hello?
1459
00:52:14,050 --> 00:52:16,052
- Not even a "Hi, Mom"?
- What?
1460
00:52:16,094 --> 00:52:17,929
- Hi, Tabitha!
- (gasps)
1461
00:52:17,971 --> 00:52:19,848
- Oh. Hi.
- (Tina coughs)
1462
00:52:20,640 --> 00:52:22,225
What?
You never told me you had
1463
00:52:22,267 --> 00:52:24,102
an older sister who could drive.
1464
00:52:24,144 --> 00:52:25,603
Uh, that's my mom.
1465
00:52:25,645 --> 00:52:27,355
Tabitha, don't interrupt.
(chuckles)
1466
00:52:27,397 --> 00:52:29,441
-Yeah, I'm a new friend
of Tabitha's... -Hey, stop.
1467
00:52:29,482 --> 00:52:31,484
- (mumbling)
- Oh, really?
1468
00:52:31,526 --> 00:52:33,319
I-I mean, we just met.
1469
00:52:33,361 --> 00:52:34,380
Well, what's your name,
new friend?
1470
00:52:34,404 --> 00:52:36,448
Stop. You're embarrassing me.
1471
00:52:36,489 --> 00:52:38,783
- Marcos. Marcos Lightspeed.
- (horse neighs)
1472
00:52:38,825 --> 00:52:40,160
(babbles, grunts)
1473
00:52:40,201 --> 00:52:41,536
- Ow!
- CAROL: Tina!
1474
00:52:41,578 --> 00:52:42,996
- What is with you?
- (Tim chuckles)
1475
00:52:43,038 --> 00:52:44,456
Cute kid.
1476
00:52:44,497 --> 00:52:46,416
Well, I better get going
if I'm gonna walk those
1477
00:52:46,458 --> 00:52:49,002
three and a half miles home...
1478
00:52:49,044 --> 00:52:50,378
in the snow...
1479
00:52:50,420 --> 00:52:52,005
without a jacket.
1480
00:52:52,047 --> 00:52:53,840
Three and a half miles?
1481
00:52:53,882 --> 00:52:56,676
Three and a half, six...
Somewhere in there. (chuckles)
1482
00:52:56,718 --> 00:52:59,054
Yeah, well, that TV dinner
is not gonna microwave itself.
1483
00:52:59,095 --> 00:53:00,472
TV dinner?
1484
00:53:00,513 --> 00:53:02,849
Yeah, I'm a latchkey kid,
so I eat whatever I want.
1485
00:53:02,891 --> 00:53:04,893
- Cartoons are my babysitter.
- (tires screech)
1486
00:53:04,934 --> 00:53:06,102
- No.
- Oh, yeah.
1487
00:53:06,144 --> 00:53:08,104
(scoffs)
1488
00:53:08,146 --> 00:53:11,399
♪ Strangers in the night ♪
1489
00:53:11,441 --> 00:53:13,902
♪ Exchanging glances ♪
1490
00:53:13,943 --> 00:53:15,195
♪ Lovers... ♪
1491
00:53:15,236 --> 00:53:16,696
What is this?
1492
00:53:16,738 --> 00:53:19,032
Some kind of prank?
1493
00:53:19,074 --> 00:53:20,367
Children can be so cruel.
1494
00:53:20,408 --> 00:53:21,826
- Hello.
- (electronic chime)
1495
00:53:21,868 --> 00:53:24,662
(screaming)
1496
00:53:24,704 --> 00:53:26,373
(grunts)
1497
00:53:28,833 --> 00:53:30,335
(retches)
1498
00:53:30,377 --> 00:53:32,629
- (grunts)
- (babies yelling, laughing)
1499
00:53:33,838 --> 00:53:35,215
(grunts)
1500
00:53:35,256 --> 00:53:36,800
(retches)
1501
00:53:36,841 --> 00:53:40,929
Whoa. This is exactly like
Bill Gates' rec room...
1502
00:53:40,970 --> 00:53:43,431
but a little smaller.
1503
00:53:44,182 --> 00:53:46,267
(grunting)
1504
00:53:47,227 --> 00:53:49,479
- (straining)
- (scraping)
1505
00:53:52,315 --> 00:53:55,068
What is all this?
1506
00:53:55,110 --> 00:53:57,362
Research and development?
1507
00:53:58,697 --> 00:54:00,907
Product testing?
1508
00:54:02,534 --> 00:54:06,996
Huh. Something tells me
this isn't day care.
1509
00:54:08,039 --> 00:54:10,917
Boy, could I use
a spy camera right about now.
1510
00:54:10,959 --> 00:54:14,462
♪ Sail away, sail away,
sail away. ♪
1511
00:54:15,255 --> 00:54:17,007
Anyway...
1512
00:54:18,675 --> 00:54:21,094
- (gasps)
- (muffled babbling)
1513
00:54:21,136 --> 00:54:22,679
TED:
Aw.
1514
00:54:22,721 --> 00:54:25,765
Now, aren't you a cutie
in that little karate outfit.
1515
00:54:25,807 --> 00:54:27,100
(baby grunts)
1516
00:54:27,142 --> 00:54:28,351
Huh.
1517
00:54:28,393 --> 00:54:30,520
(all whooping, grunting)
1518
00:54:30,562 --> 00:54:33,273
Is this some kind
of a ninja boy band?
1519
00:54:33,314 --> 00:54:34,482
(screams)
1520
00:54:34,524 --> 00:54:37,110
- Whoa...!
- (babies whooping)
1521
00:54:37,152 --> 00:54:39,112
Whoa!
1522
00:54:39,154 --> 00:54:40,947
Oh. Whoa, whoa.
1523
00:54:40,989 --> 00:54:42,866
(all grunting, whooping)
1524
00:54:42,907 --> 00:54:45,118
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh!
1525
00:54:45,160 --> 00:54:46,119
(screams)
1526
00:54:46,161 --> 00:54:47,620
Whoa. (yells)
1527
00:54:47,662 --> 00:54:48,621
I give up.
1528
00:54:48,663 --> 00:54:52,375
Cobra Kai! Cobra Kai!
1529
00:54:52,417 --> 00:54:55,420
(all grunting rapidly)
1530
00:54:55,462 --> 00:54:57,297
TED:
Sayonara, baby!
1531
00:54:57,339 --> 00:54:59,341
- Hey, there you are.
- Oh, hello! (coughs)
1532
00:54:59,382 --> 00:55:00,675
Thank you. (sighs)
1533
00:55:00,717 --> 00:55:02,469
I see that you've angered
my baby ninjas.
1534
00:55:02,510 --> 00:55:03,904
- Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
- (baby laughs, grunts)
1535
00:55:03,928 --> 00:55:05,656
- Shoo. Shoo. (chuckles)
- (sneezes, babbles)
1536
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:07,849
What maniacal underground
fortress doesn't have ninjas?
1537
00:55:07,891 --> 00:55:09,491
- Am I right? (grunts)
- Impressive, huh?
1538
00:55:09,517 --> 00:55:10,810
Pretty impressive.
1539
00:55:10,852 --> 00:55:12,312
What do you think?
What do you think?
1540
00:55:12,354 --> 00:55:13,456
TED:
I know tuition is pretty steep,
1541
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:15,565
but how do you afford all this?
1542
00:55:15,607 --> 00:55:17,525
ARMSTRONG:
Oh, that's a good question.
1543
00:55:17,567 --> 00:55:20,111
- I taught babies to code.
- No.
1544
00:55:20,153 --> 00:55:22,131
ARMSTRONG: Yes. And you know
what they say about having
1545
00:55:22,155 --> 00:55:24,324
an infinite amount of monkeys
banging on typewriters?
1546
00:55:24,366 --> 00:55:26,201
They will eventually
write Shakespeare?
1547
00:55:26,242 --> 00:55:28,370
A-plus.
Oh, boy, you are smart.
1548
00:55:28,411 --> 00:55:32,290
Or the most popular apps
that money can buy.
1549
00:55:32,332 --> 00:55:34,376
Apps. They're writing apps.
1550
00:55:34,417 --> 00:55:36,002
- Cat Chat.
- (cat meows)
1551
00:55:36,044 --> 00:55:37,337
Palm Doodle.
1552
00:55:37,379 --> 00:55:39,005
Ooh, Find My Nose.
1553
00:55:39,047 --> 00:55:40,423
- (Ted gasps)
- Stock Crush.
1554
00:55:40,465 --> 00:55:42,026
- You did Stock Crush?
- (cash register dings)
1555
00:55:42,050 --> 00:55:43,677
I love Stock Crush.
1556
00:55:43,718 --> 00:55:46,596
All us. But my next app...
1557
00:55:46,638 --> 00:55:49,349
ooh, it's gonna change
the world.
1558
00:55:49,391 --> 00:55:50,433
Forever.
1559
00:55:50,475 --> 00:55:51,768
So why bother with a school?
1560
00:55:51,810 --> 00:55:54,312
You could go public
and make millions.
1561
00:55:54,354 --> 00:55:56,064
Oh. (laughs)
1562
00:55:56,106 --> 00:55:58,441
- Billions.
- Billions.
1563
00:55:58,483 --> 00:56:01,528
Yeah, but some things are
more important than money.
1564
00:56:01,569 --> 00:56:03,196
Please don't say "love."
1565
00:56:03,238 --> 00:56:05,407
Mmm. Power.
1566
00:56:05,448 --> 00:56:07,617
That's more like it.
1567
00:56:08,576 --> 00:56:10,453
TIM:
Wow. This is so amazing.
1568
00:56:10,495 --> 00:56:13,206
First, the ride, and now
a-a full sit-down dinner.
1569
00:56:13,248 --> 00:56:14,916
Wow. What a palace.
1570
00:56:14,958 --> 00:56:17,335
- I mean, you have electricity?
- Well, yeah.
1571
00:56:17,377 --> 00:56:19,504
Man, you guys
are beyond generous.
1572
00:56:19,546 --> 00:56:21,548
You're welcome anytime.
1573
00:56:21,589 --> 00:56:23,192
- (groans)
- CAROL: Tabitha, would you mind
1574
00:56:23,216 --> 00:56:24,843
- setting the table?
- Okay, Mom.
1575
00:56:24,884 --> 00:56:27,095
Really? You're just gonna
throw that right there, huh?
1576
00:56:27,137 --> 00:56:28,263
(gasps)
1577
00:56:28,304 --> 00:56:30,890
Psst. Psst. Daddy.
1578
00:56:30,932 --> 00:56:32,767
- Shh! It's Marcos.
- What are you doing here?
1579
00:56:32,809 --> 00:56:34,352
- Where's Uncle Ted?
- What?
1580
00:56:34,394 --> 00:56:35,413
He kicked me off the mission.
1581
00:56:35,437 --> 00:56:36,354
He can't do that.
1582
00:56:36,396 --> 00:56:37,397
Only I can do that.
1583
00:56:37,439 --> 00:56:38,606
You're back on the mission.
1584
00:56:38,648 --> 00:56:40,066
No need.
I have my own mission now.
1585
00:56:40,108 --> 00:56:42,360
What? What could be more
important than my mission?
1586
00:56:42,402 --> 00:56:44,571
Got to go. Lightspeed out.
1587
00:56:45,780 --> 00:56:47,240
This is so great.
(chuckles)
1588
00:56:47,282 --> 00:56:48,825
Well, I hope you're hungry.
1589
00:56:48,867 --> 00:56:50,553
Been so long since I've
used silverware. (chuckles)
1590
00:56:50,577 --> 00:56:53,038
So, how'd you like
your first day?
1591
00:56:53,079 --> 00:56:54,414
Kind of intense.
1592
00:56:54,456 --> 00:56:56,416
(chuckles):
Yeah. You'll get used to it.
1593
00:56:56,458 --> 00:56:57,959
- Even that Nathan kid?
- Nathan.
1594
00:56:58,001 --> 00:57:00,211
- Ugh. He's a mess.
- (chuckles): Yeah.
1595
00:57:00,253 --> 00:57:02,422
- He is such a square.
- A square?
1596
00:57:02,464 --> 00:57:04,424
Uh, yeah, you know, like a dork.
1597
00:57:04,466 --> 00:57:06,343
Dweeb. Nerdlet.
A real poindexter.
1598
00:57:06,384 --> 00:57:07,886
Lame-o. Dorkus to the max.
1599
00:57:07,927 --> 00:57:09,721
(chuckles)
They used to call me.
1600
00:57:09,763 --> 00:57:12,223
- (chuckles) You're weird.
- I am?
1601
00:57:12,265 --> 00:57:14,267
Yeah, but in a good way.
1602
00:57:14,309 --> 00:57:15,769
(both chuckle)
1603
00:57:15,810 --> 00:57:18,355
So, why is the pageant
stressing you out so much?
1604
00:57:18,396 --> 00:57:20,482
(groans)
I have to sing.
1605
00:57:20,523 --> 00:57:22,692
- So what?
- I don't know.
1606
00:57:22,734 --> 00:57:25,070
My whole family is
going to be there,
1607
00:57:25,111 --> 00:57:27,238
including my dad.
1608
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:28,782
Oh.
1609
00:57:28,823 --> 00:57:30,200
Right.
1610
00:57:30,241 --> 00:57:32,285
You're embarrassed of him?
1611
00:57:32,327 --> 00:57:34,371
No. No, it's not that.
1612
00:57:34,412 --> 00:57:35,914
(Tim sighs heavily)
1613
00:57:35,955 --> 00:57:37,725
It's just, he's really good
at this kind of thing...
1614
00:57:37,749 --> 00:57:41,503
Being creative
and using your imagination...
1615
00:57:41,544 --> 00:57:43,546
But it's hard for me.
1616
00:57:43,588 --> 00:57:45,799
I just want him
to be proud of me.
1617
00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:47,133
You know?
1618
00:57:47,175 --> 00:57:49,135
(coos)
1619
00:57:49,177 --> 00:57:50,136
Really?
1620
00:57:50,178 --> 00:57:52,847
Well, yeah.
1621
00:57:53,807 --> 00:57:55,975
Um, who are
these extra plates for?
1622
00:57:56,017 --> 00:57:57,811
- (doorbell rings)
- (whispers): Mom and Dad.
1623
00:57:57,852 --> 00:57:59,729
Hey, hey!
The key still works!
1624
00:57:59,771 --> 00:58:01,290
You guys should really
change the locks.
1625
00:58:01,314 --> 00:58:02,857
- Oh, you made it.
- Look who's here!
1626
00:58:02,899 --> 00:58:03,650
Mom and Dad.
1627
00:58:03,692 --> 00:58:04,818
TABITHA:
Grandma! Grandpa!
1628
00:58:04,859 --> 00:58:06,611
- TED SR.: There she is.
- (gasps)
1629
00:58:06,653 --> 00:58:08,130
-Come here, my little
tabby cat. -Yay! You're here!
1630
00:58:08,154 --> 00:58:10,216
- Look at how big you are.
- You're almost a teenager.
1631
00:58:10,240 --> 00:58:11,616
Can you vote yet?
1632
00:58:11,658 --> 00:58:12,885
TABITHA: Ten and a half
more years, Grandma.
1633
00:58:12,909 --> 00:58:14,136
Daddy, they're gonna
recognize you.
1634
00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:15,286
No, no. It's fine.
1635
00:58:15,328 --> 00:58:17,205
I've got the glasses. See?
1636
00:58:17,247 --> 00:58:18,683
- TED SR. and TABITHA: Selfie!
- How do you do it again?
1637
00:58:18,707 --> 00:58:19,958
Bring out the baby.
1638
00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:21,560
- Hide!
- Where are you hiding that baby?
1639
00:58:21,584 --> 00:58:22,961
No. Just be cool. Be cool.
1640
00:58:23,003 --> 00:58:24,522
- JANICE: There she is.
- TED SR.: Hello.
1641
00:58:24,546 --> 00:58:25,773
TED SR.:
Hey, who's the new guy?
1642
00:58:25,797 --> 00:58:27,674
- That's Marcos.
- I gotcha.
1643
00:58:27,716 --> 00:58:30,927
(babies clamoring)
1644
00:58:30,969 --> 00:58:33,263
Attention, babies. Bienvenue.
1645
00:58:33,304 --> 00:58:35,015
Willkommen.
1646
00:58:35,056 --> 00:58:36,391
Dobro pozhalovat'.
1647
00:58:36,433 --> 00:58:39,144
- And namaste.
- (clamoring continues)
1648
00:58:39,185 --> 00:58:41,104
Uh, babies.
1649
00:58:41,146 --> 00:58:42,439
Hey, hey.
1650
00:58:42,480 --> 00:58:43,916
- No more screen time.
- (clamoring stops)
1651
00:58:43,940 --> 00:58:46,276
- (whimpering)
- ARMSTRONG: Listen.
1652
00:58:46,317 --> 00:58:49,571
Believe it or not,
I used to be just like you.
1653
00:58:49,612 --> 00:58:52,198
- (cooing)
- Yes. I even had parents.
1654
00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:55,618
Mine were child psychologists
1655
00:58:55,660 --> 00:58:58,121
who made me part
of an experiment.
1656
00:58:58,163 --> 00:58:59,372
Really?
1657
00:58:59,414 --> 00:59:02,042
They exposed me to 10,000 hours
1658
00:59:02,083 --> 00:59:05,628
-of Mozart, language lessons
and public radio. -Huh. Wow.
1659
00:59:05,670 --> 00:59:07,422
I hate public radio.
1660
00:59:07,464 --> 00:59:10,967
It was at that point I realized
I was smarter than my parents.
1661
00:59:11,009 --> 00:59:14,971
And with my first step,
I ran away from home.
1662
00:59:15,013 --> 00:59:17,223
- (babies moan sadly)
- Why?
1663
00:59:17,265 --> 00:59:19,059
They pushed me around.
1664
00:59:19,100 --> 00:59:21,227
I got told what to do
all the time.
1665
00:59:21,269 --> 00:59:22,395
(crying)
1666
00:59:22,437 --> 00:59:25,440
But a single word
changed my life.
1667
00:59:25,482 --> 00:59:27,067
"No." Say it.
1668
00:59:27,108 --> 00:59:28,401
ALL:
No!
1669
00:59:28,443 --> 00:59:30,403
- Take a nap.
- Nyet!
1670
00:59:30,445 --> 00:59:32,322
- Put on your coat.
- Nein!
1671
00:59:32,364 --> 00:59:34,699
- Eat your vegetables.
- Nahii!
1672
00:59:34,741 --> 00:59:36,993
Are you gonna let grown-ups
push you around?
1673
00:59:37,035 --> 00:59:39,371
No, no! No, no, no!
No, no! No, no, no!
1674
00:59:39,412 --> 00:59:40,747
- Are you?
- Good God, no.
1675
00:59:40,789 --> 00:59:42,082
That's right.
1676
00:59:42,123 --> 00:59:45,085
Why do parents get to be
in charge, anyway?
1677
00:59:45,126 --> 00:59:47,504
They had their chance,
and what did we get?
1678
00:59:47,545 --> 00:59:51,675
Pollution, politics, wars.
1679
00:59:51,716 --> 00:59:54,052
BABIES:
Ooh.
1680
00:59:54,094 --> 00:59:56,096
Not "ooh." "Boo."
1681
00:59:56,137 --> 00:59:57,722
ALL:
Boo!
1682
00:59:57,764 --> 01:00:01,101
The only thing holding us back
is them,
1683
01:00:01,142 --> 01:00:02,769
but not anymore.
1684
01:00:02,811 --> 01:00:06,690
The moment that we've worked
so hard for is almost here.
1685
01:00:06,731 --> 01:00:07,857
- B-Day.
- (babies cheering)
1686
01:00:07,899 --> 01:00:09,109
- B-Day?
- B-Day.
1687
01:00:09,150 --> 01:00:11,236
- I'm this many.
- I'm this many.
1688
01:00:11,277 --> 01:00:13,613
No, no, it's not...
it's not your birthday.
1689
01:00:13,655 --> 01:00:16,491
It's the beginning
of the baby revolution.
1690
01:00:16,533 --> 01:00:18,326
- Yay, yay.
- (babies cheering)
1691
01:00:18,368 --> 01:00:20,995
And there'll be cake.
Cake for everybody.
1692
01:00:21,037 --> 01:00:23,790
BABIES (chanting): Cake! Cake!
Cake! Cake! Cake! Cake!
1693
01:00:23,832 --> 01:00:25,417
- No more rules.
- (chanting continues)
1694
01:00:25,458 --> 01:00:27,293
Oh là là!
1695
01:00:27,335 --> 01:00:29,045
No more parents.
1696
01:00:29,087 --> 01:00:30,296
Uh-oh.
1697
01:00:30,338 --> 01:00:31,464
Pew, pew, pew, pew!
1698
01:00:31,506 --> 01:00:33,967
Sayonara, Mama and Papa!
1699
01:00:34,009 --> 01:00:36,011
- Oh, this is bad.
- (chuckles)
1700
01:00:36,052 --> 01:00:37,929
All right, pep rally's over.
1701
01:00:37,971 --> 01:00:40,348
Your-your parents
are gonna pick you up.
1702
01:00:40,390 --> 01:00:41,433
(crying)
1703
01:00:41,474 --> 01:00:42,976
This is my life's work.
1704
01:00:43,018 --> 01:00:45,937
Oh, yes, 17 long months.
1705
01:00:45,979 --> 01:00:48,565
To... no more parents.
(laughs)
1706
01:00:48,606 --> 01:00:50,233
Mmm. (gargles, slurps)
1707
01:00:50,275 --> 01:00:52,694
Cheers to the revolution.
1708
01:00:53,653 --> 01:00:55,363
- No. Nope. Nope.
- (Tabitha chuckles)
1709
01:00:55,405 --> 01:00:57,245
- No. Oh, that's a keeper.
- TABITHA: Oh, Tina.
1710
01:00:57,282 --> 01:00:59,367
Oh, it's so cute.
What's the app called?
1711
01:00:59,409 --> 01:01:00,827
- It's called QT Snap.
- Oh.
1712
01:01:00,869 --> 01:01:02,805
- Show me how to download that.
- Everyone has it.
1713
01:01:02,829 --> 01:01:04,831
So, Marcos... Lightspeed?
1714
01:01:04,873 --> 01:01:06,458
- Is that what you said?
- Mm-hmm.
1715
01:01:06,499 --> 01:01:08,293
Sounds like a cartoon name.
1716
01:01:08,335 --> 01:01:09,502
(laughing)
1717
01:01:09,544 --> 01:01:11,338
- It really does.
- (laughs awkwardly)
1718
01:01:11,379 --> 01:01:14,299
Well, my parents,
they're a little wacky, so...
1719
01:01:14,341 --> 01:01:15,925
(slurping)
1720
01:01:15,967 --> 01:01:18,678
Huh. It's like I know you
from somewhere.
1721
01:01:18,720 --> 01:01:20,055
I don't think so.
1722
01:01:20,096 --> 01:01:21,723
- That is a keeper, too.
- Hey. Hey.
1723
01:01:21,765 --> 01:01:23,767
- Doesn't he look familiar?
- I don't think I do.
1724
01:01:23,808 --> 01:01:25,226
Yeah, he looks just like Tim.
1725
01:01:25,268 --> 01:01:26,853
Yeah. You look like Tim.
1726
01:01:26,895 --> 01:01:29,064
- (coughs)
- Hmm? -Huh?
1727
01:01:29,105 --> 01:01:30,607
Except Tim didn't wear glasses.
1728
01:01:30,648 --> 01:01:32,776
Oh, that's right.
(scoffs)
1729
01:01:32,817 --> 01:01:35,278
Huh. Well, how about that.
1730
01:01:35,320 --> 01:01:37,864
- (Tina sighs)
- Hey, where is Tim, anyway?
1731
01:01:37,906 --> 01:01:39,699
Tim and Ted are on a trip.
1732
01:01:39,741 --> 01:01:41,910
- TED SR. and JANICE: Together?
- They're bonding.
1733
01:01:41,951 --> 01:01:43,995
- Well, that's about time.
- Yeah.
1734
01:01:44,037 --> 01:01:46,206
I just hope Tim's back
in time for the pageant.
1735
01:01:46,247 --> 01:01:47,725
- (Janice scoffs)
- (Ted Sr. chuckles)
1736
01:01:47,749 --> 01:01:50,669
Uh, why...
why wouldn't he be there?
1737
01:01:50,710 --> 01:01:52,712
- (laughs) Tim Time.
- Tim Time.
1738
01:01:52,754 --> 01:01:53,773
- JANICE: Oh. (chuckles)
- (Carol laughs)
1739
01:01:53,797 --> 01:01:54,881
What's-what's Tim Time?
1740
01:01:54,923 --> 01:01:56,383
- Go ahead.
- Okay.
1741
01:01:56,424 --> 01:02:00,345
Well, Marcos, Tim Time
is like a black hole
1742
01:02:00,387 --> 01:02:04,808
where things like reality
and being on time get lost.
1743
01:02:04,849 --> 01:02:06,267
- (Tabitha laughs)
- Oh.
1744
01:02:06,309 --> 01:02:09,062
Tabitha's father has
a very active imagination.
1745
01:02:09,104 --> 01:02:10,814
Which is a good thing.
1746
01:02:10,855 --> 01:02:12,541
Yeah, that's a...
I'd say that's a good thing.
1747
01:02:12,565 --> 01:02:15,902
Oh, remember when he said our
boss was trying to kidnap us?
1748
01:02:15,944 --> 01:02:17,445
- He did?
- (laughter)
1749
01:02:17,487 --> 01:02:20,031
TED SR.: Or that his baby
brother could walk and talk
1750
01:02:20,073 --> 01:02:21,700
but only when
we weren't looking.
1751
01:02:21,741 --> 01:02:23,034
(laughter)
1752
01:02:23,076 --> 01:02:24,953
("William Tell Overture"
playing)
1753
01:02:24,994 --> 01:02:27,831
(chuckling):
Wow. Turn around.
1754
01:02:29,374 --> 01:02:31,042
TABITHA:
That's so Dad.
1755
01:02:31,084 --> 01:02:33,753
You know, Ted was
quite a handful himself.
1756
01:02:33,795 --> 01:02:36,089
- Oh, he could be very...
- TED SR.: Uptight.
1757
01:02:36,131 --> 01:02:37,882
JANICE:
Mm. Yes. High-strung.
1758
01:02:37,924 --> 01:02:40,301
Oh. Remember the time
he sued us?
1759
01:02:40,343 --> 01:02:43,054
- (laughter)
- JANICE: Teenagers. Ugh.
1760
01:02:43,096 --> 01:02:45,306
He really looked up
to his big brother, though.
1761
01:02:45,348 --> 01:02:47,475
- BOTH: He did?
- JANICE: Oh, yeah.
1762
01:02:47,517 --> 01:02:49,310
He wouldn't leave him alone.
1763
01:02:49,352 --> 01:02:50,937
Everything Tim did,
Teddy wanted to do.
1764
01:02:50,979 --> 01:02:52,480
- TABITHA: Really?
- Yeah.
1765
01:02:52,522 --> 01:02:54,607
- Tagalong Teddy, we called him.
- (Tabitha chuckles)
1766
01:02:54,649 --> 01:02:56,776
- JANICE: Well, not to his face.
- TED SR.: No, no.
1767
01:02:56,818 --> 01:02:59,029
Not to his face.
He was very litigious.
1768
01:02:59,070 --> 01:03:01,281
But you know what?
Your dad didn't mind.
1769
01:03:01,322 --> 01:03:03,324
He was so proud
of his little brother.
1770
01:03:03,366 --> 01:03:05,160
- Oh, yeah.
- He loved showing him off.
1771
01:03:05,201 --> 01:03:07,871
TED SR.: Those guys did
everything together.
1772
01:03:07,912 --> 01:03:09,956
JANICE:
They were best friends.
1773
01:03:09,998 --> 01:03:11,708
- Just like you and me.
- (Tina giggling)
1774
01:03:11,750 --> 01:03:13,460
Right, Tina?
1775
01:03:13,501 --> 01:03:14,794
Best friends forever.
1776
01:03:14,836 --> 01:03:16,147
- Tickle monster!
- (Carol chuckles)
1777
01:03:16,171 --> 01:03:18,298
CAROL:
That's so sweet.
1778
01:03:26,014 --> 01:03:27,474
TABITHA:
And this is my closet.
1779
01:03:27,515 --> 01:03:29,309
- TIM: Oh, cool closet.
- And this is my bed.
1780
01:03:29,351 --> 01:03:31,269
- And this is my fish.
- (tapping)
1781
01:03:31,311 --> 01:03:35,023
-Hey, want to see something
really, really cool? -Sure.
1782
01:03:36,024 --> 01:03:37,984
I made this vocalizer
for Dr. Hawking.
1783
01:03:38,026 --> 01:03:39,778
Hey, my old...
1784
01:03:39,819 --> 01:03:41,738
- What did you do?!
- Check this out.
1785
01:03:41,780 --> 01:03:43,907
Say hello, Dr. Hawking.
1786
01:03:44,824 --> 01:03:46,826
ROBOTIC VOICE:
Hell-l-l-l-l...
1787
01:03:46,868 --> 01:03:50,497
(grunts)
Um, he has performance anxiety.
1788
01:03:50,538 --> 01:03:51,915
Mm-hmm. Yep.
1789
01:03:51,956 --> 01:03:53,583
Oh, this is Lamb Lamb.
1790
01:03:53,625 --> 01:03:55,126
Hey, Lamb Lamb.
1791
01:03:55,168 --> 01:03:57,837
That's my galaxy model
right up there on my shelf.
1792
01:03:57,879 --> 01:04:00,048
My scientist of the week award.
1793
01:04:00,090 --> 01:04:01,925
- Wow.
- My geode rock collection.
1794
01:04:01,966 --> 01:04:03,510
And my telescope.
1795
01:04:03,551 --> 01:04:04,678
Sweet.
1796
01:04:04,719 --> 01:04:07,013
- Hey, cool guitar.
- Yeah.
1797
01:04:07,055 --> 01:04:08,056
That's my dad's.
1798
01:04:08,098 --> 01:04:09,933
Cool dad. (grunts)
1799
01:04:09,974 --> 01:04:11,226
Are you okay?
1800
01:04:11,267 --> 01:04:13,520
Yeah, I'm a lot taller
in my mind.
1801
01:04:13,561 --> 01:04:16,731
Hey, if you want,
I can help you with your song.
1802
01:04:16,773 --> 01:04:19,025
No, you can't.
1803
01:04:19,067 --> 01:04:20,694
- Your ears will bleed.
- Oh, please.
1804
01:04:20,735 --> 01:04:22,362
It'll be fun.
1805
01:04:22,404 --> 01:04:24,948
How about this one?
It's a classic.
1806
01:04:24,989 --> 01:04:27,033
(sighs)
Do we have to?
1807
01:04:27,075 --> 01:04:29,369
Come on. Let's try.
1808
01:04:30,370 --> 01:04:32,122
Okay.
1809
01:04:33,164 --> 01:04:34,749
It's not gonna be good, though.
1810
01:04:34,791 --> 01:04:35,917
No judgment.
1811
01:04:35,959 --> 01:04:37,460
We're just having fun.
1812
01:04:37,502 --> 01:04:39,587
(playing gentle melody)
1813
01:04:42,424 --> 01:04:46,469
(off-key):
♪ There's no place like home ♪
1814
01:04:46,511 --> 01:04:48,638
♪ For the holidays ♪
1815
01:04:48,680 --> 01:04:50,598
ROBOTIC VOICE:
Please stop.
1816
01:04:50,640 --> 01:04:54,227
- No, stop. Aah...!
- ♪ 'Cause no matter ♪
1817
01:04:54,269 --> 01:04:56,896
♪ How far away you roam... ♪
1818
01:04:56,938 --> 01:04:58,314
(stops playing)
1819
01:04:58,356 --> 01:05:00,066
Good... try.
1820
01:05:00,108 --> 01:05:02,736
Ugh! I just get so nervous.
1821
01:05:02,777 --> 01:05:04,738
(chuckles):
That's okay.
1822
01:05:04,779 --> 01:05:07,240
Listen, all you got to do
1823
01:05:07,282 --> 01:05:10,243
is imagine that
you're inside the song.
1824
01:05:10,285 --> 01:05:14,080
Everything in the lyrics
is actually happening to you.
1825
01:05:14,122 --> 01:05:17,250
And you can see the notes.
1826
01:05:17,292 --> 01:05:20,211
(playing "If You Want
to Sing Out, Sing Out")
1827
01:05:22,130 --> 01:05:25,800
TIM: ♪ Well, if you want
to sing out, sing out ♪
1828
01:05:25,842 --> 01:05:29,387
♪ And if you want
to be free, be free ♪
1829
01:05:29,429 --> 01:05:32,766
-Wow. Whoa! -♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
1830
01:05:32,807 --> 01:05:35,435
- ♪ You know that there are ♪
- Whoa. Marcos, wait up.
1831
01:05:35,477 --> 01:05:37,187
- Come on.
- (grunts)
1832
01:05:37,228 --> 01:05:39,457
-♪ And if you want to sing
high, sing high ♪ -(whimpering)
1833
01:05:39,481 --> 01:05:41,441
- That's a little too high.
- ♪ And if you want ♪
1834
01:05:41,483 --> 01:05:43,443
- ♪ To sing low, sing low ♪
- Whoa.
1835
01:05:43,485 --> 01:05:45,111
I got you.
1836
01:05:45,153 --> 01:05:47,364
-♪ 'Cause there's a million
ways to go ♪ -(gasps)
1837
01:05:47,405 --> 01:05:49,115
♪ You know that there are ♪
1838
01:05:49,157 --> 01:05:50,533
OMG, that's a lot.
1839
01:05:50,575 --> 01:05:51,659
(screams)
1840
01:05:51,701 --> 01:05:54,496
♪ Uh-huh, it's easy ♪
1841
01:05:54,537 --> 01:05:56,998
- ♪ Uh-huh ♪
- (screams, laughs)
1842
01:05:57,040 --> 01:05:59,626
♪ You only need to try ♪
1843
01:05:59,668 --> 01:06:01,419
(screams, laughs)
1844
01:06:01,461 --> 01:06:03,338
(yelling)
1845
01:06:03,380 --> 01:06:05,548
♪ You can sing what you want ♪
1846
01:06:05,590 --> 01:06:07,175
Whoo! Yeah, this is fun!
1847
01:06:07,217 --> 01:06:10,387
- ♪ The opportunity's yours ♪
- (whooping)
1848
01:06:10,428 --> 01:06:13,473
♪ And if you do it your way ♪
1849
01:06:13,515 --> 01:06:14,808
Whoa.
1850
01:06:14,849 --> 01:06:17,143
♪ You can do it today ♪
1851
01:06:17,185 --> 01:06:20,021
Marcos, wait. Where are you?
1852
01:06:20,063 --> 01:06:21,648
Come on. You can do it.
1853
01:06:21,690 --> 01:06:24,526
- I can't. I can't.
- (audience cheering)
1854
01:06:24,567 --> 01:06:27,153
♪ ♪
1855
01:06:27,195 --> 01:06:28,321
(gasps softly)
1856
01:06:28,363 --> 01:06:30,156
(audience murmuring quietly)
1857
01:06:30,198 --> 01:06:32,450
(panting nervously)
1858
01:06:33,702 --> 01:06:36,996
- Now go for it.
- (audience chattering)
1859
01:06:37,038 --> 01:06:38,832
- ♪ Ah-ah-ah ♪
- (chatter stops)
1860
01:06:38,873 --> 01:06:41,084
♪ ♪
1861
01:06:41,126 --> 01:06:43,628
Whoa. (chuckles)
1862
01:06:46,381 --> 01:06:47,549
Hey.
1863
01:06:47,590 --> 01:06:49,634
♪ It's easy ♪
1864
01:06:49,676 --> 01:06:51,052
♪ Ah-ah-ah ♪
1865
01:06:51,094 --> 01:06:54,681
♪ You only need to try ♪
1866
01:06:54,723 --> 01:06:56,433
TABITHA:
All right. My turn.
1867
01:06:56,474 --> 01:06:58,393
TIM:
Here we go. It's all you.
1868
01:06:58,435 --> 01:07:01,354
♪ Well, if I want
to sing out, sing out ♪
1869
01:07:01,396 --> 01:07:03,064
- ♪ Sing out ♪
- Yes, let it out.
1870
01:07:03,106 --> 01:07:04,983
♪ And if I want
to be free, be free ♪
1871
01:07:05,025 --> 01:07:06,359
♪ Be free ♪
1872
01:07:06,401 --> 01:07:08,570
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
1873
01:07:08,611 --> 01:07:10,947
♪ I know that there are,
I know that there are ♪
1874
01:07:10,989 --> 01:07:13,408
- ♪ I know that there are ♪
- ♪ You know that there are ♪
1875
01:07:13,450 --> 01:07:16,369
- ♪ I know that there are... ♪
- ♪ You know that there are... ♪
1876
01:07:16,411 --> 01:07:19,956
- ♪ I know that there are ♪
- ♪ You know that there are ♪
1877
01:07:19,998 --> 01:07:24,085
♪ I know that there are. ♪
1878
01:07:27,756 --> 01:07:30,133
Wow. That was so great.
1879
01:07:30,175 --> 01:07:31,676
No, you were so great.
1880
01:07:31,718 --> 01:07:32,844
Thanks, Marcos.
1881
01:07:32,886 --> 01:07:34,262
- (camera clicks)
- What?
1882
01:07:34,304 --> 01:07:35,740
- Oh, that's a keeper.
- Oh, they can see us.
1883
01:07:35,764 --> 01:07:36,931
- They can see us.
- Aw.
1884
01:07:36,973 --> 01:07:38,224
Guys, come on.
1885
01:07:38,266 --> 01:07:40,393
Stop. No, do it. Do it.
1886
01:07:40,435 --> 01:07:42,354
(chuckling):
Oh, no.
1887
01:07:42,395 --> 01:07:44,647
Parents, right? (chuckles)
1888
01:07:44,689 --> 01:07:46,900
- Bye, Templeton family!
- CAROL: Bye-bye.
1889
01:07:46,941 --> 01:07:48,568
- Bye, Marcos.
- Lightspeed.
1890
01:07:48,610 --> 01:07:49,611
Weird kid.
1891
01:07:49,652 --> 01:07:51,321
JANICE:
Yeah, I don't like him.
1892
01:07:51,363 --> 01:07:53,698
(guitar playing softly)
1893
01:07:53,740 --> 01:07:56,326
♪ Catch my eye ♪
1894
01:07:57,118 --> 01:07:59,788
♪ Take my hand ♪
1895
01:08:00,622 --> 01:08:02,290
♪ This bond is tighter than we ♪
1896
01:08:02,332 --> 01:08:04,000
You go get 'em, Tabitha.
1897
01:08:04,042 --> 01:08:06,169
♪ Ever planned ♪
1898
01:08:06,211 --> 01:08:09,047
♪ Give me courage ♪
1899
01:08:09,089 --> 01:08:10,674
♪ So I can land... ♪
1900
01:08:10,715 --> 01:08:12,276
TINA: Pick up, pick up,
pick up, pick up,
1901
01:08:12,300 --> 01:08:13,778
pick up, pick up,
pick up, pick up, pick up,
1902
01:08:13,802 --> 01:08:15,929
pick up, pick up, pick up,
pick up. Choo-choo!
1903
01:08:15,970 --> 01:08:18,264
Don't they understand
it's the fate of the world?
1904
01:08:18,306 --> 01:08:20,350
I've been on hold forever!
1905
01:08:20,392 --> 01:08:22,435
CHILD: All operators
are currently napping.
1906
01:08:22,477 --> 01:08:24,979
I've been on hold so long
I got a tooth growing in.
1907
01:08:25,021 --> 01:08:27,440
Back in my day, we wrote memos.
1908
01:08:27,482 --> 01:08:29,067
That's cute and old-timey.
1909
01:08:29,109 --> 01:08:30,402
(scoffs)
1910
01:08:30,443 --> 01:08:32,445
TED:
I weep for the future.
1911
01:08:32,487 --> 01:08:34,948
Do you want to talk about your
feelings now while I'm on hold?
1912
01:08:34,989 --> 01:08:36,116
I can give you 20 minutes.
1913
01:08:36,157 --> 01:08:37,409
No.
1914
01:08:37,450 --> 01:08:39,035
Let's get to the nut,
the nugget.
1915
01:08:39,077 --> 01:08:40,537
What are you afraid of?
1916
01:08:40,578 --> 01:08:42,997
Sharks, getting shot
in the head with an arrow,
1917
01:08:43,039 --> 01:08:44,416
and... the IRS.
1918
01:08:44,457 --> 01:08:45,959
- That's it.
- There you go.
1919
01:08:46,001 --> 01:08:47,460
Was that so hard?
Baby steps.
1920
01:08:47,502 --> 01:08:49,462
Now, what about being lonely?
1921
01:08:49,504 --> 01:08:51,339
- I'm not lonely.
- Mm-hmm.
1922
01:08:51,381 --> 01:08:53,800
I'm just... alone.
1923
01:08:53,842 --> 01:08:55,301
There's a difference.
1924
01:08:55,343 --> 01:08:56,988
-I think it's time
you read your file. -(gasps)
1925
01:08:57,012 --> 01:08:58,596
- Ah-ah-ah-ah.
- Just give me.
1926
01:08:58,638 --> 01:09:00,015
Whoa. This is it?
1927
01:09:00,056 --> 01:09:02,517
It's so thin.
1928
01:09:02,559 --> 01:09:04,394
YOUNG TIM:
Dear Boss Baby,
1929
01:09:04,436 --> 01:09:06,021
I promise you this:
1930
01:09:06,062 --> 01:09:08,732
Every morning when
you wake up, I will be there.
1931
01:09:08,773 --> 01:09:11,484
Every night at dinner,
I will be there.
1932
01:09:11,526 --> 01:09:13,903
Every birthday party,
every Christmas morning,
1933
01:09:13,945 --> 01:09:15,405
I will be there.
1934
01:09:15,447 --> 01:09:18,825
Year after year after year.
1935
01:09:18,867 --> 01:09:23,788
And you and I
will always be brothers.
1936
01:09:23,830 --> 01:09:25,707
Always.
1937
01:09:25,749 --> 01:09:28,501
Makes me want to make
a sad face.
1938
01:09:28,543 --> 01:09:30,754
(toy train whistle blows)
1939
01:09:33,256 --> 01:09:35,508
We were just kids.
1940
01:09:35,550 --> 01:09:38,094
We didn't know anything
about the real world.
1941
01:09:38,136 --> 01:09:40,638
And eventually,
you have to grow up.
1942
01:09:40,680 --> 01:09:42,891
Just because you grow up,
it doesn't mean
1943
01:09:42,932 --> 01:09:44,434
you have to grow apart.
1944
01:09:44,476 --> 01:09:47,103
I don't know.
Maybe it's already too late.
1945
01:09:47,145 --> 01:09:49,105
TIM (grunting):
Hey.
1946
01:09:49,147 --> 01:09:50,357
Sorry I'm late.
1947
01:09:50,398 --> 01:09:51,941
TINA:
Daddy!
1948
01:09:51,983 --> 01:09:53,151
Daddy, Daddy.
1949
01:09:53,193 --> 01:09:54,402
What's going on?
1950
01:09:54,444 --> 01:09:55,904
Uncle Ted really misses you.
1951
01:09:55,945 --> 01:09:58,281
- Isn't that nice?
- (toy train whistle blows)
1952
01:10:01,076 --> 01:10:03,870
So, hey, uh, what you doing?
1953
01:10:03,912 --> 01:10:05,330
Oh, I was, uh...
1954
01:10:05,372 --> 01:10:08,583
I don't know,
I was just working on this.
1955
01:10:08,625 --> 01:10:10,418
(gasps)
1956
01:10:12,837 --> 01:10:15,632
Look, I'm sorry about
what I said at recess.
1957
01:10:15,674 --> 01:10:18,259
What happens on the playground
stays on the playground.
1958
01:10:18,301 --> 01:10:20,178
I was just worried
about Tabitha, you know?
1959
01:10:20,220 --> 01:10:21,554
She's your daughter. I get it.
1960
01:10:21,596 --> 01:10:23,264
This whole time,
I was thinking about
1961
01:10:23,306 --> 01:10:25,642
what I wanted
and not what she needed.
1962
01:10:25,684 --> 01:10:27,828
I think I finally got this
parenting thing figured out.
1963
01:10:27,852 --> 01:10:28,978
Gold star for you, Daddy.
1964
01:10:29,020 --> 01:10:30,665
- Keep it up, Pops.
- Yeah, well, about that.
1965
01:10:30,689 --> 01:10:33,775
Armstrong wants to get rid
of parents somehow.
1966
01:10:33,817 --> 01:10:36,111
-Sorry, what? -He's planning
a baby revolution.
1967
01:10:36,152 --> 01:10:37,654
Ugh, come on.
1968
01:10:37,696 --> 01:10:39,906
Just when I got good
at this whole parenting thing.
1969
01:10:39,948 --> 01:10:41,408
We got to stop him.
1970
01:10:41,449 --> 01:10:42,992
- Not we.
- You?
1971
01:10:43,034 --> 01:10:44,369
Neither one of us.
1972
01:10:44,411 --> 01:10:46,037
-BabyCorp is taking it
from here. -Ah.
1973
01:10:46,079 --> 01:10:48,224
So, what, they're gonna send in
the Baby SEALS or something?
1974
01:10:48,248 --> 01:10:49,749
- Looks like it.
- So you'll, um...
1975
01:10:49,791 --> 01:10:52,127
you'll be headed back
to your office.
1976
01:10:52,168 --> 01:10:54,421
TED: Uh, yeah.
Well, keep in touch, Tim.
1977
01:10:54,462 --> 01:10:56,256
Hello? BabyCorp?
1978
01:10:56,297 --> 01:10:58,258
Thank goodness, BabyCorp.
Well, BabyCo...
1979
01:10:58,299 --> 01:11:00,510
(stammering):
Wha-What? What are you saying,
1980
01:11:00,552 --> 01:11:02,512
there's not enough evidence,
BabyCorp? I...
1981
01:11:02,554 --> 01:11:04,347
-Uh-oh. -So you're not
gonna do anything?
1982
01:11:04,389 --> 01:11:05,765
But, BabyCorp, I...
1983
01:11:05,807 --> 01:11:07,475
Ugh. Well, then
we'll take care of it.
1984
01:11:07,517 --> 01:11:09,269
You know what, BabyCorp?
1985
01:11:09,310 --> 01:11:10,687
I quit!
1986
01:11:10,729 --> 01:11:12,814
What a bunch of
diaper sniffers. (grunts)
1987
01:11:12,856 --> 01:11:14,566
(whistle blows,
train powers down)
1988
01:11:14,607 --> 01:11:16,776
Looks like we have to stop
Armstrong ourselves.
1989
01:11:16,818 --> 01:11:19,362
We're going rogue.
I like it.
1990
01:11:19,404 --> 01:11:21,031
- So the mission's back on?
- Yeah.
1991
01:11:21,072 --> 01:11:23,825
If you two can put up with
each other a little longer.
1992
01:11:23,867 --> 01:11:27,120
I suppose I can live with that.
Tim?
1993
01:11:27,162 --> 01:11:28,121
I think that's doable.
1994
01:11:28,163 --> 01:11:29,122
Yay!
1995
01:11:29,164 --> 01:11:30,582
Forced together again.
1996
01:11:30,623 --> 01:11:33,376
WIZZIE:
It's 8:45 p.m.
1997
01:11:33,418 --> 01:11:35,462
TED:
Okay. Our clock is ticking.
1998
01:11:35,503 --> 01:11:38,590
We have to stop Armstrong
before the formula wears off.
1999
01:11:38,631 --> 01:11:42,010
Working as a team,
we will strike at the pageant.
2000
01:11:42,052 --> 01:11:43,303
Go, Tina.
2001
01:11:43,345 --> 01:11:45,638
Now, this top secret document...
2002
01:11:45,680 --> 01:11:47,140
Sweetie, it's the program.
2003
01:11:47,182 --> 01:11:49,476
This top secret program reveals
2004
01:11:49,517 --> 01:11:52,479
that Armstrong is scheduled
to address the audience,
2005
01:11:52,520 --> 01:11:55,565
which he will do right here
at the very end.
2006
01:11:55,607 --> 01:11:58,193
We need someone backstage.
Tim, that's you.
2007
01:11:58,234 --> 01:12:00,862
How am I gonna get backstage
if I'm not in the pageant?
2008
01:12:00,904 --> 01:12:02,739
TED: My people will
take care of that.
2009
01:12:02,781 --> 01:12:03,573
(toy squeaks)
2010
01:12:03,615 --> 01:12:04,991
- Ah!
- Thank you.
2011
01:12:05,033 --> 01:12:06,159
- (chuckles)
- Thank you.
2012
01:12:06,201 --> 01:12:07,243
- No!
- Great.
2013
01:12:07,285 --> 01:12:09,329
- And... go.
- (laughing)
2014
01:12:09,371 --> 01:12:10,789
Glue.
2015
01:12:10,830 --> 01:12:12,665
(screams)
2016
01:12:12,707 --> 01:12:15,001
ROBOT VOICE:
There, there. All better.
2017
01:12:15,043 --> 01:12:16,628
Awesome.
2018
01:12:16,670 --> 01:12:20,090
Now, I'll be your eyes
and your ears in the audience.
2019
01:12:20,131 --> 01:12:22,008
I can't let Mommy see me talk,
2020
01:12:22,050 --> 01:12:23,927
or she's gonna start
squealing and hugging me,
2021
01:12:23,968 --> 01:12:25,679
but these little doodads
will let you
2022
01:12:25,720 --> 01:12:27,514
understand my baby talk.
2023
01:12:27,555 --> 01:12:29,182
It's called a GAGA device.
2024
01:12:29,224 --> 01:12:30,558
- Aw, that's cute.
- Check it out.
2025
01:12:30,600 --> 01:12:31,851
(speaks gibberish)
2026
01:12:31,893 --> 01:12:33,120
(over GAGA):
Can you hear me, Daddy?
2027
01:12:33,144 --> 01:12:34,354
Also cute.
2028
01:12:34,396 --> 01:12:36,439
Meanwhile,
with my new purple status,
2029
01:12:36,481 --> 01:12:38,483
I can stay close to Armstrong.
2030
01:12:38,525 --> 01:12:40,527
Um, that's-that's an eyebrow.
2031
01:12:40,568 --> 01:12:42,529
- Oh. Sorry.
- Uh, no, that's, uh...
2032
01:12:42,570 --> 01:12:44,280
TED:
When the moment is right,
2033
01:12:44,322 --> 01:12:45,907
I'll implant a device.
2034
01:12:45,949 --> 01:12:47,409
- Got it.
- Got what?
2035
01:12:47,450 --> 01:12:48,618
I mean, you've got this.
2036
01:12:48,660 --> 01:12:50,662
Go get 'em, tiger.
(chuckles)
2037
01:12:50,704 --> 01:12:52,622
- Oh, thank you, parents.
- (applause)
2038
01:12:52,664 --> 01:12:54,040
Thank you. There's the...
2039
01:12:54,082 --> 01:12:56,042
There's the old enthusiasm
I like to see.
2040
01:12:56,084 --> 01:12:58,420
TINA: This will
allow me to control his suit.
2041
01:12:58,461 --> 01:13:01,881
I can make Muttonchops
do whatever I want.
2042
01:13:01,923 --> 01:13:03,758
(babbling)
2043
01:13:03,800 --> 01:13:06,177
TINA:
I can make him dance.
2044
01:13:06,219 --> 01:13:07,887
I can make him prance.
2045
01:13:07,929 --> 01:13:09,740
- Hey, no, no, no, no.
- Including exposing himself
2046
01:13:09,764 --> 01:13:11,558
- to the audience.
- (audience gasps)
2047
01:13:11,599 --> 01:13:14,352
-(screams) -Every parentwill pull out their phone.
2048
01:13:14,394 --> 01:13:16,730
Don't look at me.
Don't look at me!
2049
01:13:16,771 --> 01:13:19,357
The photos will spread
like a diaper rash.
2050
01:13:19,399 --> 01:13:21,234
Cut to our pizza party.
2051
01:13:21,276 --> 01:13:23,194
Boom! Bam! Poo! Poof!
2052
01:13:23,236 --> 01:13:24,404
Questions?
2053
01:13:24,446 --> 01:13:25,631
After Tabitha sings
her solo, right?
2054
01:13:25,655 --> 01:13:27,115
After Tabitha sings.
2055
01:13:27,157 --> 01:13:30,785
Now we just sit back, relax
and enjoy the show.
2056
01:13:32,037 --> 01:13:33,580
(fanfare playing)
2057
01:13:33,621 --> 01:13:36,082
ARMSTRONG: Welcome, parents,
to our holiday pageant.
2058
01:13:36,124 --> 01:13:39,586
Remember, flash photography
in the auditorium
2059
01:13:39,627 --> 01:13:42,255
is absolutely okay.
2060
01:13:42,297 --> 01:13:45,050
Take a picture. Show your kids
that you love 'em.
2061
01:13:45,091 --> 01:13:46,593
Yippee!
2062
01:13:46,634 --> 01:13:47,969
Come on, Tim.
2063
01:13:48,011 --> 01:13:50,263
- You promised you'd be here.
- (man groans)
2064
01:13:50,305 --> 01:13:51,765
Oh, sorry. This seat is taken.
2065
01:13:51,806 --> 01:13:53,725
- Yep. Sorry.
- Oh, no. (mutters)
2066
01:13:53,767 --> 01:13:55,977
- So sorry. I... Sorry.
- (man grunts, mutters)
2067
01:13:56,019 --> 01:13:58,104
- Sorry! I am so sorry.
- (speaking gibberish)
2068
01:13:58,146 --> 01:14:00,440
(over GAGA): Uncle Teddy,
are you in position?
2069
01:14:00,482 --> 01:14:01,816
The baby's in the cradle.
2070
01:14:01,858 --> 01:14:04,486
- The baby's in the cradle.
- Mmm. (slurping)
2071
01:14:04,527 --> 01:14:06,112
(speaking gibberish)
2072
01:14:06,154 --> 01:14:08,114
(over GAGA):
Papa Bear, can you read me?
2073
01:14:08,156 --> 01:14:09,741
The flake has landed.
2074
01:14:09,783 --> 01:14:11,826
Places! Places, everybody!
2075
01:14:11,868 --> 01:14:13,220
- Here we go. Here we go.
- Oh, my gosh.
2076
01:14:13,244 --> 01:14:15,139
- It's starting. It's starting.
- (sighs) Finally.
2077
01:14:15,163 --> 01:14:16,706
It's starting. It's starting.
2078
01:14:16,748 --> 01:14:17,999
Yay!
2079
01:14:18,041 --> 01:14:20,126
- You're a big pageant guy, huh?
- No, no, no.
2080
01:14:20,168 --> 01:14:22,671
I'm not talking about the show.
I'm talking about B-Day.
2081
01:14:23,505 --> 01:14:24,881
B-Day?
2082
01:14:24,923 --> 01:14:27,258
Oh, yeah. It's already
in the parents' phones.
2083
01:14:27,300 --> 01:14:29,010
(coughs)
2084
01:14:29,052 --> 01:14:30,804
I taught babies to code.
2085
01:14:30,845 --> 01:14:33,515
TED:
Apps. They're writing apps.
2086
01:14:33,556 --> 01:14:35,725
But my next app...
2087
01:14:35,767 --> 01:14:39,312
ooh, it's gonna change
the world forever.
2088
01:14:39,354 --> 01:14:43,983
QT Snap is the app that's going
to change the world forever?
2089
01:14:44,025 --> 01:14:46,986
Forever starts today.
(chuckles)
2090
01:14:47,028 --> 01:14:49,030
Uh, cool. (gasps)
2091
01:14:49,072 --> 01:14:51,449
(audience gasping)
2092
01:14:51,491 --> 01:14:54,119
♪ ♪
2093
01:14:54,160 --> 01:14:55,662
AUDIENCE:
Aw.
2094
01:14:55,704 --> 01:14:57,223
- KIDS: ♪ It's wintertime ♪
- (Tim mumbling)
2095
01:14:57,247 --> 01:14:58,832
♪ It's the best time of year ♪
2096
01:14:58,873 --> 01:15:00,750
♪ But due to ice caps melting ♪
2097
01:15:00,792 --> 01:15:02,836
♪ Global warming's here ♪
2098
01:15:02,877 --> 01:15:04,671
♪ It feels like summer ♪
2099
01:15:04,713 --> 01:15:06,673
♪ The snow has disappeared ♪
2100
01:15:06,715 --> 01:15:08,341
♪ It's all our parents' fault ♪
2101
01:15:08,383 --> 01:15:11,261
- ♪ So we're all doomed ♪
- TIM: ♪ All, uh... ♪
2102
01:15:11,302 --> 01:15:12,721
♪ Doomed. ♪
2103
01:15:12,762 --> 01:15:14,347
This is kind of dark.
2104
01:15:14,389 --> 01:15:15,700
Did the kids just say
we're doomed?
2105
01:15:15,724 --> 01:15:17,684
What the heck are we watching?
2106
01:15:17,726 --> 01:15:19,769
- (camera clicks)
- (yelps)
2107
01:15:19,811 --> 01:15:21,521
Their brains are
turning to mush.
2108
01:15:21,563 --> 01:15:23,064
Months of hypnotic research
embedded
2109
01:15:23,106 --> 01:15:25,900
in the most user-friendly
photo app ever made.
2110
01:15:25,942 --> 01:15:27,527
Ooh.
2111
01:15:27,569 --> 01:15:29,612
Now all we need to do
is sit back, relax
2112
01:15:29,654 --> 01:15:31,364
and enjoy the show.
2113
01:15:31,406 --> 01:15:32,741
- WOMAN: Hey!
- Right.
2114
01:15:32,782 --> 01:15:34,909
(chuckles) I'll be right back.
We're, uh...
2115
01:15:34,951 --> 01:15:36,578
- WOMAN: Hey!
- Out of Dundle Floofers.
2116
01:15:36,619 --> 01:15:37,954
- (chuckles)
- Mmm.
2117
01:15:37,996 --> 01:15:39,539
(chuckling)
2118
01:15:39,581 --> 01:15:41,041
KIDS:
Diwali!
2119
01:15:41,082 --> 01:15:42,917
(traditional Hindu music
playing)
2120
01:15:42,959 --> 01:15:44,544
Las Posadas!
2121
01:15:44,586 --> 01:15:46,880
(mariachi music playing)
2122
01:15:46,921 --> 01:15:49,049
- Agnostic!
- (music stops)
2123
01:15:50,258 --> 01:15:52,594
- And Hanukkah!
- (screams)
2124
01:15:52,635 --> 01:15:53,928
Your son is so talented.
2125
01:15:53,970 --> 01:15:56,222
- Oh, so is yours.
- Liars.
2126
01:15:56,264 --> 01:15:58,725
Tina, come in.
B-Day is happening now.
2127
01:15:58,767 --> 01:16:00,268
It's all in the phones.
2128
01:16:00,310 --> 01:16:03,271
Armstrong is using an app
to brainwash the parents.
2129
01:16:03,313 --> 01:16:05,315
- (gasps)
- (over GAGA): Gasp.
2130
01:16:05,357 --> 01:16:07,567
- TED: We have to stop the show.
- (speaking gibberish)
2131
01:16:07,609 --> 01:16:09,170
(over GAGA):
Okay, okay. Uh, there's a...
2132
01:16:09,194 --> 01:16:11,696
there's a big old
no-touchy switch backstage.
2133
01:16:11,738 --> 01:16:13,073
(speaking gibberish)
2134
01:16:13,114 --> 01:16:14,759
(over GAGA): Daddy,
we have to pull the plug.
2135
01:16:14,783 --> 01:16:16,993
Daddy, come in.
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,
2136
01:16:17,035 --> 01:16:18,429
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy.
2137
01:16:18,453 --> 01:16:20,372
Ugh. He's not responding.
2138
01:16:20,413 --> 01:16:21,706
(panting):
Of course not.
2139
01:16:21,748 --> 01:16:23,875
- I'll do it myself.
- Stop!
2140
01:16:23,917 --> 01:16:26,753
- (grunts)
- Theater kids only.
2141
01:16:26,795 --> 01:16:29,089
Oh, come on, nativity!
2142
01:16:29,130 --> 01:16:30,465
Look holier!
2143
01:16:30,507 --> 01:16:31,925
(angelic choir vocalizing)
2144
01:16:31,966 --> 01:16:33,510
(gasps)
2145
01:16:33,551 --> 01:16:35,929
TIM:
Hey, Tabitha.
2146
01:16:35,970 --> 01:16:37,847
(chuckling):
Don't you worry, okay?
2147
01:16:37,889 --> 01:16:39,766
You're gonna be great.
2148
01:16:39,808 --> 01:16:42,060
Thanks, Marcos.
And thanks for all your help.
2149
01:16:42,102 --> 01:16:43,186
Anytime.
2150
01:16:43,228 --> 01:16:45,271
I feel like you really
understand me.
2151
01:16:45,313 --> 01:16:46,940
I'm so excited.
2152
01:16:46,981 --> 01:16:50,735
I can't wait to see the look
on my dad's face when I sing.
2153
01:16:51,695 --> 01:16:53,613
MEGHAN:
Hey! You're on, Templeton!
2154
01:16:53,655 --> 01:16:54,948
Wish me luck.
2155
01:16:54,989 --> 01:16:56,366
MEGHAN:
And break a leg.
2156
01:16:56,408 --> 01:16:57,909
Or two, for that matter.
(laughs)
2157
01:16:57,951 --> 01:17:01,538
KIDS:
♪ We're in this together ♪
2158
01:17:01,579 --> 01:17:04,124
♪ We live in harmony... ♪
2159
01:17:04,165 --> 01:17:05,375
TED:
Psst.
2160
01:17:06,334 --> 01:17:07,460
Tim!
2161
01:17:07,502 --> 01:17:08,712
Is that the baby Jesus?
2162
01:17:08,753 --> 01:17:10,005
(gasps)
2163
01:17:10,046 --> 01:17:11,256
(screams)
2164
01:17:11,297 --> 01:17:12,966
(laughing)
2165
01:17:13,008 --> 01:17:14,217
♪ ♪
2166
01:17:14,259 --> 01:17:17,804
♪ We have to shut down
the pageant. ♪
2167
01:17:17,846 --> 01:17:19,723
- Yeah!
- What? No. Why?
2168
01:17:19,764 --> 01:17:22,142
Armstrong's turning
the parents into zombies
2169
01:17:22,183 --> 01:17:23,852
so they'll do whatever he wants.
2170
01:17:23,893 --> 01:17:25,979
What? What are you doing? No!
2171
01:17:26,021 --> 01:17:27,397
- (grunts)
- (chair crashes)
2172
01:17:27,439 --> 01:17:28,773
Tabitha's on next.
2173
01:17:28,815 --> 01:17:30,775
TED: You'd risk
the future of the world
2174
01:17:30,817 --> 01:17:32,819
- to see your daughter sing?
- Yes!
2175
01:17:32,861 --> 01:17:34,922
- I have to be there for her.
- Look who's worried about
2176
01:17:34,946 --> 01:17:36,531
showing up for things
all of a sudden.
2177
01:17:36,573 --> 01:17:38,158
What's that supposed to mean?
2178
01:17:38,199 --> 01:17:39,826
You didn't even come
to my graduation.
2179
01:17:39,868 --> 01:17:41,286
Ow! Which one?
2180
01:17:41,327 --> 01:17:43,747
Business school, law school.
None of them.
2181
01:17:43,788 --> 01:17:45,498
You didn't even come
to my wedding.
2182
01:17:45,540 --> 01:17:47,250
- Which one?
- I only had one!
2183
01:17:47,292 --> 01:17:48,918
We had a deal, Tim.
2184
01:17:48,960 --> 01:17:50,837
You promised
you'd be there always.
2185
01:17:50,879 --> 01:17:52,422
Whoa. Where did you...
2186
01:17:52,464 --> 01:17:55,050
- Breach of contract!
- (grunts)
2187
01:17:55,884 --> 01:17:57,677
(ninja babies whooping)
2188
01:17:57,719 --> 01:17:58,845
Whoa.
2189
01:17:58,887 --> 01:18:00,180
- Whoa!
- Whoa!
2190
01:18:00,221 --> 01:18:02,599
ARMSTRONG:
How do you do there, fellas?
2191
01:18:02,640 --> 01:18:05,560
(chuckles)
Nothing's gonna ruin my B-Day.
2192
01:18:05,602 --> 01:18:08,146
Not even you.
2193
01:18:08,188 --> 01:18:10,023
- Oh, busted.
- Yeah, it was obvious
2194
01:18:10,065 --> 01:18:11,649
from the very, very beginning
2195
01:18:11,691 --> 01:18:14,319
that you two were
working together.
2196
01:18:14,361 --> 01:18:15,737
What gave us away?
2197
01:18:15,779 --> 01:18:18,031
Well, I'd say the bickering,
2198
01:18:18,073 --> 01:18:19,866
the, uh, petty disputes,
2199
01:18:19,908 --> 01:18:21,534
the jealousy.
2200
01:18:21,576 --> 01:18:24,704
You know, you two are brothers
in every single way.
2201
01:18:24,746 --> 01:18:26,414
(hums a tune)
2202
01:18:26,456 --> 01:18:28,708
- Off to the Box they go.
- (ninja babies yelling)
2203
01:18:28,750 --> 01:18:30,752
What? No.
Not the Box. Not now.
2204
01:18:30,794 --> 01:18:32,379
Please.
2205
01:18:32,420 --> 01:18:34,398
Aw, it's just... it's too bad
that you're never gonna
2206
01:18:34,422 --> 01:18:36,549
have a chance to reboot
your relationship and...
2207
01:18:36,591 --> 01:18:38,510
- No!
- And restore the closeness
2208
01:18:38,551 --> 01:18:39,886
that you once felt.
2209
01:18:39,928 --> 01:18:41,554
- Sorry about that.
- No.
2210
01:18:41,596 --> 01:18:43,807
- No, no, no, no. No!
- Adios, Marcos.
2211
01:18:43,848 --> 01:18:46,893
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪
2212
01:18:46,935 --> 01:18:48,770
CAROL:
Oh, look, look. There she is.
2213
01:18:48,812 --> 01:18:49,938
There's our little angel.
2214
01:18:49,979 --> 01:18:51,856
- Oh! Tabby's in the tree.
- Ah! Oh!
2215
01:18:53,358 --> 01:18:55,568
♪ Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪
2216
01:18:55,610 --> 01:18:57,362
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh... ♪
2217
01:18:57,404 --> 01:19:00,699
(ninja babies
speaking gibberish, laughing)
2218
01:19:00,740 --> 01:19:02,409
(yells)
2219
01:19:02,450 --> 01:19:04,786
You had one job to do.
2220
01:19:04,828 --> 01:19:06,788
One job.
2221
01:19:06,830 --> 01:19:08,790
- Oh, no.
- The fountain.
2222
01:19:08,832 --> 01:19:10,458
It's flooding the room.
2223
01:19:10,500 --> 01:19:11,835
This isn't a time-out.
2224
01:19:11,876 --> 01:19:13,253
It's game over.
2225
01:19:13,294 --> 01:19:15,338
♪ Ooh-ooh ♪
2226
01:19:15,380 --> 01:19:17,674
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
2227
01:19:17,716 --> 01:19:20,468
(panting)
2228
01:19:23,054 --> 01:19:24,431
MEGHAN:
Psst.
2229
01:19:24,472 --> 01:19:28,059
It's one, two, three
and one, two, three.
2230
01:19:28,101 --> 01:19:30,311
- (gasps, pants)
- (piano playing)
2231
01:19:39,446 --> 01:19:41,948
♪ Catch my eye ♪
2232
01:19:41,990 --> 01:19:45,118
♪ Take my hand ♪
2233
01:19:45,160 --> 01:19:50,457
♪ This bond is tighter
than we ever planned ♪
2234
01:19:50,498 --> 01:19:52,834
♪ Give me courage ♪
2235
01:19:52,876 --> 01:19:55,295
♪ So I can land ♪
2236
01:19:55,337 --> 01:19:58,840
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2237
01:19:58,882 --> 01:20:02,927
♪ So together we stand ♪
2238
01:20:03,887 --> 01:20:06,848
♪ Laugh and cry with me ♪
2239
01:20:06,890 --> 01:20:09,517
♪ Fly that high with me ♪
2240
01:20:09,559 --> 01:20:11,686
-♪ See the sunset
and the sunrise ♪ -(gasping)
2241
01:20:11,728 --> 01:20:14,356
-♪ The world looks so good
through our eyes ♪ -Wow.
2242
01:20:14,397 --> 01:20:19,361
♪ Like the moon
and stars at night ♪
2243
01:20:20,987 --> 01:20:23,031
You're right. I blew it.
2244
01:20:23,073 --> 01:20:25,158
I ruined the mission.
(sighs)
2245
01:20:25,200 --> 01:20:27,077
And I'm a terrible father.
2246
01:20:27,118 --> 01:20:30,080
Hey, you did sort of
ruin the mission.
2247
01:20:30,121 --> 01:20:31,706
But you're a great dad.
2248
01:20:31,748 --> 01:20:33,166
No, I'm not.
2249
01:20:33,208 --> 01:20:34,793
I could never do your job.
2250
01:20:34,834 --> 01:20:36,378
I mean, you work
around the clock,
2251
01:20:36,419 --> 01:20:38,088
you can't even quit
if you wanted to,
2252
01:20:38,129 --> 01:20:39,714
and you don't even get paid.
2253
01:20:39,756 --> 01:20:42,092
Frankly, I don't see
how that's legal.
2254
01:20:42,133 --> 01:20:44,260
I was always jealous of you.
2255
01:20:44,302 --> 01:20:46,721
I wanted to be successful,
too, you know.
2256
01:20:46,763 --> 01:20:48,056
Sure, Tim.
2257
01:20:48,098 --> 01:20:50,433
I made a lot of money...
2258
01:20:50,475 --> 01:20:52,560
but you made a family.
2259
01:20:53,645 --> 01:20:55,689
The truth is...
2260
01:20:55,730 --> 01:20:57,649
it's lonely at the top.
2261
01:21:00,985 --> 01:21:03,697
♪ Reach with me ♪
2262
01:21:03,738 --> 01:21:07,033
♪ See the sky ♪
2263
01:21:07,075 --> 01:21:11,788
♪ I'll always be here
for the rest of your life ♪
2264
01:21:11,830 --> 01:21:14,791
♪ Sail that ocean ♪
2265
01:21:14,833 --> 01:21:17,210
♪ Find that sand ♪
2266
01:21:17,252 --> 01:21:20,797
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2267
01:21:20,839 --> 01:21:24,843
♪ So together we stand ♪
2268
01:21:24,884 --> 01:21:27,095
(kids vocalizing)
2269
01:21:30,265 --> 01:21:34,185
You know, I'm... I'm sorry we
don't see each other anymore.
2270
01:21:34,227 --> 01:21:36,229
A very wise person once told me,
2271
01:21:36,271 --> 01:21:38,064
just because you grow up
2272
01:21:38,106 --> 01:21:40,066
doesn't mean
you have to grow apart.
2273
01:21:40,108 --> 01:21:41,609
- Was it Tina?
- Oh, yeah.
2274
01:21:41,651 --> 01:21:44,571
(laughing): Oh, it is crazy
how smart she is.
2275
01:21:44,612 --> 01:21:46,823
It's like she looks
right into your soul.
2276
01:21:46,865 --> 01:21:49,743
I'm sorry that I missed
your graduations.
2277
01:21:49,784 --> 01:21:52,454
I'm sorry I missed
your one wedding.
2278
01:21:52,495 --> 01:21:55,749
BOTH: I'm sorry
I wasn't there for you.
2279
01:21:55,790 --> 01:21:58,668
♪ Side by side ♪
2280
01:21:58,710 --> 01:22:01,338
♪ Hand in hand ♪
2281
01:22:01,379 --> 01:22:06,217
♪ We speak a language
no one else can understand ♪
2282
01:22:06,259 --> 01:22:09,179
- ♪ Hear those cheers ♪
- (cameras clicking)
2283
01:22:09,220 --> 01:22:11,473
♪ Strike up the band ♪
2284
01:22:11,514 --> 01:22:15,977
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2285
01:22:16,019 --> 01:22:23,193
♪ So together we stand. ♪
2286
01:22:25,862 --> 01:22:27,030
(chuckles)
2287
01:22:27,072 --> 01:22:29,115
(panting)
2288
01:22:32,744 --> 01:22:34,746
(pants, whimpers)
2289
01:22:34,788 --> 01:22:37,165
(one person clapping)
2290
01:22:38,875 --> 01:22:41,503
(hyperventilating)
2291
01:22:41,544 --> 01:22:43,797
(crying)
2292
01:22:43,838 --> 01:22:45,840
Oh, Tabitha.
2293
01:22:45,882 --> 01:22:47,300
(gasps) Gramps?
2294
01:22:47,342 --> 01:22:49,010
Nana? Mom?
2295
01:22:49,052 --> 01:22:50,178
Oh, no!
2296
01:22:50,220 --> 01:22:52,097
- (grunts)
- Oh, my gosh, Tabitha.
2297
01:22:52,138 --> 01:22:53,973
You did such a great job.
2298
01:22:54,015 --> 01:22:57,227
Well, that's just
horribly rude of you all.
2299
01:22:57,268 --> 01:22:58,561
Come on, everybody.
2300
01:22:58,603 --> 01:23:02,440
Uh, how about
a standing ovation?
2301
01:23:02,482 --> 01:23:05,402
- (laughs) Very good.
- (Tina gasps)
2302
01:23:05,443 --> 01:23:07,028
They're zombies!
2303
01:23:07,070 --> 01:23:08,738
We did it!
2304
01:23:08,780 --> 01:23:12,659
- The baby revolution has begun.
- (babies cheering, laughing)
2305
01:23:12,701 --> 01:23:14,994
No more need for costumes.
2306
01:23:15,036 --> 01:23:16,913
(yells, laughs)
2307
01:23:16,955 --> 01:23:19,124
Who wants cake?
2308
01:23:20,041 --> 01:23:21,501
Oh, my gosh.
2309
01:23:21,543 --> 01:23:24,087
ARMSTRONG:
Happy B-Day, everybody.
2310
01:23:24,129 --> 01:23:26,131
Daddy, Uncle Ted.
2311
01:23:26,172 --> 01:23:27,716
Come in. Where are you?
2312
01:23:27,757 --> 01:23:30,051
(crying)
2313
01:23:31,678 --> 01:23:33,680
♪ ♪
2314
01:23:33,722 --> 01:23:36,016
(door opens, closes)
2315
01:23:36,057 --> 01:23:38,059
(sniffles)
2316
01:23:38,101 --> 01:23:40,061
TINA:
Here you go, sis.
2317
01:23:40,103 --> 01:23:42,605
Now, I already used this,
so I know it's safe.
2318
01:23:42,647 --> 01:23:44,399
Thanks.
2319
01:23:45,775 --> 01:23:48,319
Wait. Are you t-talking?
2320
01:23:48,361 --> 01:23:50,321
(chuckling): I know.
It's pretty weird, isn't it?
2321
01:23:50,363 --> 01:23:52,574
(screams)
Oh, my gosh, you're talking!
2322
01:23:52,615 --> 01:23:54,034
It's an emergency.
2323
01:23:54,075 --> 01:23:56,369
I'm on a supersecret mission
from BabyCorp.
2324
01:23:56,411 --> 01:23:57,370
(gasps)
2325
01:23:57,412 --> 01:23:59,789
You mean Dad's stories are true?
2326
01:23:59,831 --> 01:24:01,708
That's what the suit says.
2327
01:24:01,750 --> 01:24:02,917
How do I look?
2328
01:24:02,959 --> 01:24:04,336
No way!
2329
01:24:04,377 --> 01:24:06,379
Now, I can't get ahold
of Dad or Uncle Ted,
2330
01:24:06,421 --> 01:24:08,298
so I need your help, big sis.
2331
01:24:08,340 --> 01:24:09,924
Wait, wait.
Dad's here?
2332
01:24:09,966 --> 01:24:11,426
They've been here
the whole time.
2333
01:24:11,468 --> 01:24:13,386
-Where? -I don't have
much time to explain,
2334
01:24:13,428 --> 01:24:15,764
but Dr. Armstrong is a baby.
2335
01:24:15,805 --> 01:24:17,724
A very bad, bad baby.
2336
01:24:17,766 --> 01:24:21,603
Soon, the world is
gonna be our playground.
2337
01:24:21,644 --> 01:24:24,064
-Whee! (grunts) -("Push It"
by Salt-N-Pepa playing)
2338
01:24:24,105 --> 01:24:25,440
(laughs)
2339
01:24:25,482 --> 01:24:27,817
Now we can make parents
do whatever we want.
2340
01:24:27,859 --> 01:24:29,944
Awesome! Yeah!
2341
01:24:29,986 --> 01:24:32,906
No more rules.
2342
01:24:32,947 --> 01:24:35,617
Sayonara, Mama and Papa.
2343
01:24:35,658 --> 01:24:36,951
Yeah.
2344
01:24:36,993 --> 01:24:38,078
(babies laughing)
2345
01:24:38,119 --> 01:24:39,412
- Mom?
- Dad?
2346
01:24:39,454 --> 01:24:40,413
Grandpa?
2347
01:24:40,455 --> 01:24:42,123
Whoa. Are you kidding me?
2348
01:24:42,165 --> 01:24:44,250
We need to shut it down
before it goes global.
2349
01:24:44,292 --> 01:24:46,419
- ARMSTRONG: Yeah. (laughs)
- What are we gonna do?
2350
01:24:46,461 --> 01:24:48,672
Okay, we need to find
the big whatchamacallit
2351
01:24:48,713 --> 01:24:50,298
that controls
the parents' phones.
2352
01:24:50,340 --> 01:24:51,841
- The server.
- Yes. Yes.
2353
01:24:51,883 --> 01:24:54,010
Is there a big one
of those whatsits at school?
2354
01:24:54,052 --> 01:24:55,595
Uh, let's see.
2355
01:24:55,637 --> 01:24:58,765
Well, servers get really hot,
so you need air ducts.
2356
01:24:58,807 --> 01:25:00,100
TINA:
Now you're thinking!
2357
01:25:00,141 --> 01:25:02,310
TABITHA:
Which intersect at the acorn!
2358
01:25:02,352 --> 01:25:04,646
- A-plus!
- Come on.
2359
01:25:04,688 --> 01:25:06,106
- This way.
- (gasps)
2360
01:25:06,147 --> 01:25:08,358
Opportunity knocks.
2361
01:25:08,400 --> 01:25:10,944
First, we need to make
a quick pit stop.
2362
01:25:10,985 --> 01:25:14,280
AUTOMATED VOICE (distorted):
Your time has concluded.
2363
01:25:14,322 --> 01:25:16,449
- (both panting)
- It looks like this is it, Tim.
2364
01:25:16,491 --> 01:25:18,785
Well, hey, at least we have
2365
01:25:18,827 --> 01:25:22,455
these last final
precious moments together.
2366
01:25:23,665 --> 01:25:25,875
Precious. Precious!
2367
01:25:25,917 --> 01:25:28,336
(whistling)
2368
01:25:29,129 --> 01:25:30,880
- ♪ ♪
- (whinnies)
2369
01:25:32,090 --> 01:25:35,135
- Oh, right. Precious. Precious!
- (continues whistling)
2370
01:25:35,176 --> 01:25:37,303
♪ ♪
2371
01:25:38,555 --> 01:25:40,682
- (Ted continues whistling)
- (Tim sputtering)
2372
01:25:44,019 --> 01:25:46,438
(whistling and sputtering
continue)
2373
01:25:47,939 --> 01:25:50,191
(banging on glass)
2374
01:25:55,739 --> 01:25:57,157
(both gasping)
2375
01:25:57,198 --> 01:25:58,783
(grunts)
2376
01:25:59,743 --> 01:26:00,910
(coughing)
2377
01:26:00,952 --> 01:26:01,911
(whinnies)
2378
01:26:01,953 --> 01:26:03,997
That's my girl.
2379
01:26:04,039 --> 01:26:05,165
Thank you.
2380
01:26:05,206 --> 01:26:07,167
(sputters, spits)
2381
01:26:07,208 --> 01:26:08,418
(gasps) Tina?
2382
01:26:08,460 --> 01:26:09,836
Tina, Tina, come in.
It's Daddy.
2383
01:26:09,878 --> 01:26:12,213
Daddy! Listen, we have
to shut down the server.
2384
01:26:12,255 --> 01:26:14,007
- It's in the acorn.
- Whoa.
2385
01:26:14,049 --> 01:26:15,675
This is so weird.
2386
01:26:15,717 --> 01:26:16,968
I call shotgun.
2387
01:26:17,010 --> 01:26:18,053
Quick, to the acorn!
2388
01:26:18,094 --> 01:26:19,637
- TED: Hyah!
- (neighing)
2389
01:26:20,805 --> 01:26:22,349
BOTH:
Yeehaw!
2390
01:26:22,390 --> 01:26:24,184
Hold on to your chaps, pal.
2391
01:26:24,225 --> 01:26:25,286
- (ninja baby shouts)
- Whoa!
2392
01:26:25,310 --> 01:26:27,562
(all whooping)
2393
01:26:30,899 --> 01:26:32,901
- (screams)
- Oh, no!
2394
01:26:33,902 --> 01:26:36,029
Glue! (laughs)
2395
01:26:36,071 --> 01:26:38,531
Yah! Pixie dust! Aha.
2396
01:26:38,573 --> 01:26:39,949
- Yeah, baby. -Yes.
- (whinnies)
2397
01:26:39,991 --> 01:26:42,285
(babbling)
2398
01:26:42,327 --> 01:26:43,912
(eerie chuckling)
2399
01:26:43,953 --> 01:26:45,830
(shouts)
2400
01:26:45,872 --> 01:26:47,791
(eerie chuckling)
2401
01:26:47,832 --> 01:26:49,209
Wha...?
2402
01:26:49,250 --> 01:26:51,419
CREEPY GIRL:
Where'd I go?
2403
01:26:52,253 --> 01:26:54,547
- Whoa!
- I like your pajamas.
2404
01:26:54,589 --> 01:26:55,423
(screams)
2405
01:26:55,465 --> 01:26:58,718
(ninja babies crying)
2406
01:26:58,760 --> 01:27:00,428
Where are you going?
2407
01:27:00,470 --> 01:27:01,888
- Hyah!
- (whooping)
2408
01:27:01,930 --> 01:27:03,765
- Glue.
- TED: I'm proud to be a yellow.
2409
01:27:03,807 --> 01:27:05,058
I like your pony.
2410
01:27:05,100 --> 01:27:06,101
(both scream)
2411
01:27:06,142 --> 01:27:07,394
Thank you.
2412
01:27:07,435 --> 01:27:09,396
- (crying)
- ARMSTRONG (over radio): What?
2413
01:27:09,437 --> 01:27:12,315
Ah, ah, ah. No, no, no.
2414
01:27:14,025 --> 01:27:16,111
(whirring)
2415
01:27:16,152 --> 01:27:19,364
Now let's crack that big nut.
(grunts)
2416
01:27:20,240 --> 01:27:22,534
Oh, no.
It's about to go worldwide.
2417
01:27:22,575 --> 01:27:24,786
How are we gonna get up there?
2418
01:27:25,787 --> 01:27:27,497
- Really?
- ARMSTRONG: Well, you got grit.
2419
01:27:27,539 --> 01:27:29,124
I'll give you that.
2420
01:27:29,165 --> 01:27:31,167
Gumption, even. Very admirable.
2421
01:27:31,209 --> 01:27:33,336
And yet, uh, annoying.
2422
01:27:33,378 --> 01:27:35,588
Quite annoying. Yeah.
2423
01:27:35,630 --> 01:27:38,174
I'm gonna have to,
you know, uh, stop you.
2424
01:27:38,216 --> 01:27:39,426
Glue me, glue me, glue me.
2425
01:27:39,467 --> 01:27:40,969
Precious, sic him.
2426
01:27:41,011 --> 01:27:42,303
You're too little and too late.
2427
01:27:42,345 --> 01:27:44,431
- (clang)
- Ah, ba-bad dog.
2428
01:27:44,472 --> 01:27:47,767
- Pets aren't allowed in school.
- Aah! Precious!
2429
01:27:49,269 --> 01:27:50,937
And you, my pudgy protégé.
2430
01:27:50,979 --> 01:27:52,272
Go, go, go, go! Move! Move!
2431
01:27:52,313 --> 01:27:54,274
- I offered you the world.
- (both yell)
2432
01:27:54,315 --> 01:27:55,751
- We could have been partners.
- (groaning)
2433
01:27:55,775 --> 01:27:57,610
I've got something better
than a partner.
2434
01:27:57,652 --> 01:27:59,696
- I have a brother.
- Yeah!
2435
01:27:59,738 --> 01:28:01,906
- (grunts) Let go.
- No, you let go.
2436
01:28:01,948 --> 01:28:04,117
Wow. Point taken.
2437
01:28:04,159 --> 01:28:05,827
What? What's going on?
2438
01:28:06,995 --> 01:28:09,205
(yelling)
2439
01:28:09,247 --> 01:28:10,457
Hey, that's my leisure suit.
2440
01:28:10,498 --> 01:28:11,875
It looks better on her.
2441
01:28:11,916 --> 01:28:13,376
Hands up, diapers down.
2442
01:28:13,418 --> 01:28:14,794
Things are about to get weird.
2443
01:28:14,836 --> 01:28:16,504
- Yeah, that's my girls!
- (Ted laughs)
2444
01:28:16,546 --> 01:28:18,465
- That's really Dad?
- Yep.
2445
01:28:18,506 --> 01:28:20,675
I said a lot of stuff
to that kid.
2446
01:28:20,717 --> 01:28:22,469
Well, quite the family reunion.
2447
01:28:22,510 --> 01:28:23,928
Uh, the more the merrier.
2448
01:28:23,970 --> 01:28:26,097
- I say let's call your parents.
- TIM: Oh, no.
2449
01:28:26,139 --> 01:28:27,474
(zombielike murmuring)
2450
01:28:27,515 --> 01:28:29,309
- Uh-oh.
- Okay.
2451
01:28:29,351 --> 01:28:31,644
Mommy and Daddy,
let's hug 'em... to death.
2452
01:28:31,686 --> 01:28:33,563
Oh, don't worry about us.
Get to the server.
2453
01:28:33,605 --> 01:28:35,482
- Go, Tina, go!
- (whoops)
2454
01:28:35,523 --> 01:28:38,526
- (Armstrong stammering)
- (Tina grunts, yells)
2455
01:28:38,568 --> 01:28:40,362
- Hey!
- You got this, Tina.
2456
01:28:40,403 --> 01:28:41,738
Get down from there.
2457
01:28:41,780 --> 01:28:43,490
TED:
Go for his lollies!
2458
01:28:43,531 --> 01:28:45,825
Never touch another man's pony.
2459
01:28:45,867 --> 01:28:46,910
(all grunt)
2460
01:28:46,951 --> 01:28:49,287
Here. Stick around.
Stick around.
2461
01:28:49,329 --> 01:28:51,706
Uh, Tim, what do we do now?!
2462
01:28:51,748 --> 01:28:53,667
Don't move.
Maybe they won't see us.
2463
01:28:53,708 --> 01:28:55,335
TED:
They see us, Tim. They see us.
2464
01:28:55,377 --> 01:28:56,711
TIM:
Did you move? I didn't move.
2465
01:28:56,753 --> 01:28:58,171
- TED: Really, Tim?
- (grunting)
2466
01:28:58,213 --> 01:29:00,006
Oh. Hey, that's a little
too high now.
2467
01:29:00,048 --> 01:29:02,842
Don't look down.
Look straight ahead, okay?
2468
01:29:02,884 --> 01:29:04,719
(grunts, whimpers)
2469
01:29:04,761 --> 01:29:06,388
- (buzzer sounds)
- It's locked.
2470
01:29:06,429 --> 01:29:08,181
Can I give you a hand?
2471
01:29:08,223 --> 01:29:09,492
Of course,
I mean that facetiously,
2472
01:29:09,516 --> 01:29:12,185
because the hand acts as a...
as a key.
2473
01:29:12,227 --> 01:29:13,520
No, no. No, no, no.
2474
01:29:13,561 --> 01:29:15,230
- Hey, hey. No, no, no, no.
- Thanks, sis.
2475
01:29:15,271 --> 01:29:17,524
(grunts)
Stay away from my server.
2476
01:29:17,565 --> 01:29:19,025
- (yells)
- (grunts)
2477
01:29:19,067 --> 01:29:20,544
- Shut it down, Tabitha.
- What are you doing?
2478
01:29:20,568 --> 01:29:22,445
What are you doing?
No, no, no! No!
2479
01:29:22,487 --> 01:29:24,197
Don't do that.
2480
01:29:24,239 --> 01:29:25,573
- Oh, no!
- (zombielike grunting)
2481
01:29:25,615 --> 01:29:27,200
- Hugs.
- Hug Grandpa.
2482
01:29:27,242 --> 01:29:28,785
It's Night ofthe Living Boomers.
2483
01:29:28,827 --> 01:29:31,871
- Dad, stop! (screams)
- ADULTS: Hugs.
2484
01:29:31,913 --> 01:29:32,956
(yells)
2485
01:29:32,997 --> 01:29:34,374
(grunts, gasps)
2486
01:29:34,416 --> 01:29:36,543
(groans) Back.
Back, you little monsters.
2487
01:29:36,584 --> 01:29:38,962
- You back off, candy pants.
- (yells, grunts)
2488
01:29:39,004 --> 01:29:40,130
(screams)
2489
01:29:40,171 --> 01:29:42,215
Ha! Got your nose.
2490
01:29:42,257 --> 01:29:43,591
(grunting)
2491
01:29:43,633 --> 01:29:46,052
Oh, right in the breadbasket!
2492
01:29:46,094 --> 01:29:48,221
(both grunting rapidly)
2493
01:29:48,263 --> 01:29:50,932
(both babbling)
2494
01:29:53,518 --> 01:29:54,769
- Ow!
- Ha!
2495
01:29:54,811 --> 01:29:56,247
- Knocked his block off.
- Ah, poopy.
2496
01:29:56,271 --> 01:29:58,064
Tina, I think I got it. Yes!
2497
01:29:58,106 --> 01:30:00,233
Don't hit that button.
Don't hit that button. Aah!
2498
01:30:00,275 --> 01:30:02,068
Ow! Ooh!
2499
01:30:02,110 --> 01:30:04,779
- And... enter.
- ARMSTRONG: No, no! Stop it!
2500
01:30:04,821 --> 01:30:06,823
- (screams)
- Cut it out. (mutters)
2501
01:30:06,865 --> 01:30:09,617
- Look what you made me do.
- (gasps) The fire alarm.
2502
01:30:09,659 --> 01:30:11,411
- ARMSTRONG: Darn it.
- TABITHA: Dad!
2503
01:30:11,453 --> 01:30:13,788
Uncle Ted!
Pull the fire alarm!
2504
01:30:13,830 --> 01:30:15,430
- The girls need help.
- TED: No kissies!
2505
01:30:15,457 --> 01:30:17,709
The girls need us. (grunts)
2506
01:30:17,751 --> 01:30:20,545
- (alarm ringing)
- (grunts) Time's up, halflings.
2507
01:30:20,587 --> 01:30:23,590
(sputters)
Great galloping gargoyles!
2508
01:30:23,631 --> 01:30:27,093
- (Ted screaming)
- WIZZIE: What? What?
2509
01:30:27,135 --> 01:30:29,346
Tim! Get to the fire alarm!
2510
01:30:29,387 --> 01:30:30,805
I'll hold them back.
2511
01:30:30,847 --> 01:30:33,099
TED:
Make it rain, baby.
2512
01:30:33,141 --> 01:30:34,434
TIM:
I'm on it.
2513
01:30:34,476 --> 01:30:35,894
What's the matter?
2514
01:30:35,935 --> 01:30:37,496
(voice cracks): You can't
handle the awkward phase?
2515
01:30:37,520 --> 01:30:38,605
(whimpering)
2516
01:30:38,646 --> 01:30:40,982
Go, Marcos... uh, Dad. Go!
2517
01:30:41,024 --> 01:30:42,484
- (gasps)
- I'm back!
2518
01:30:42,525 --> 01:30:43,985
- Here we go.
- Come on.
2519
01:30:44,027 --> 01:30:46,112
How about another round,
you tough guy? Come on!
2520
01:30:46,154 --> 01:30:47,530
Ow. Stop it.
2521
01:30:47,572 --> 01:30:48,948
I still got these.
(grunting)
2522
01:30:48,990 --> 01:30:50,617
TABITHA:
You put my sister down.
2523
01:30:50,658 --> 01:30:53,828
B-Day will happen,
whether you like it or not.
2524
01:30:53,870 --> 01:30:56,122
- You shall not pass!
- (zombielike murmuring)
2525
01:30:56,164 --> 01:30:58,041
Uh, you shall not pass.
2526
01:30:58,083 --> 01:30:59,751
No! Stop passing.
2527
01:30:59,793 --> 01:31:01,461
- (grunts)
- (fire alarm ringing)
2528
01:31:01,503 --> 01:31:02,712
Yeah, Dad!
2529
01:31:02,754 --> 01:31:04,172
Way to go! (whoops)
2530
01:31:04,214 --> 01:31:06,299
- (alarm stops)
- (Tabitha gasps)
2531
01:31:06,341 --> 01:31:07,884
TABITHA:
That's it?
2532
01:31:07,926 --> 01:31:10,178
That's right. Why? What?
The school's expensive.
2533
01:31:10,220 --> 01:31:13,306
- I had to cut costs someplace.
- (both grunt)
2534
01:31:13,348 --> 01:31:14,474
Oh, no. It's not working.
2535
01:31:14,516 --> 01:31:15,642
Did you pull it right?
2536
01:31:15,684 --> 01:31:16,976
How else you gonna pull it?
2537
01:31:17,018 --> 01:31:19,020
ARMSTRONG (laughs):
You'll see I'm right.
2538
01:31:19,062 --> 01:31:20,647
I'll show everybody.
2539
01:31:20,689 --> 01:31:23,817
The age of parents is over.
2540
01:31:23,858 --> 01:31:26,277
(babies cooing, murmuring)
2541
01:31:28,697 --> 01:31:31,157
ARMSTRONG:
Yay, yay, yay. (sighs)
2542
01:31:31,199 --> 01:31:33,827
How about you watch me
have a little toast?
2543
01:31:33,868 --> 01:31:37,122
To the baby revolution
and to me.
2544
01:31:37,163 --> 01:31:38,581
(gasps)
2545
01:31:40,709 --> 01:31:42,627
-It's time for the
candy volcano... -Mmm, mmm.
2546
01:31:42,669 --> 01:31:44,509
- Oh, that's good.
- TABITHA and TINA: Of doom!
2547
01:31:44,546 --> 01:31:46,506
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
2548
01:31:46,548 --> 01:31:48,008
No, no, no! No!
2549
01:31:48,049 --> 01:31:50,510
(yells)
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
2550
01:31:50,552 --> 01:31:52,178
- No, no, no.
- Boom shakalaka?
2551
01:31:52,220 --> 01:31:53,847
- Boom!
- Don't do that!
2552
01:31:53,888 --> 01:31:56,141
- (crackling, sizzling)
- (screaming)
2553
01:31:56,182 --> 01:31:58,435
(both grunt)
2554
01:31:58,476 --> 01:32:00,729
- Whoa!
- (screaming)
2555
01:32:00,770 --> 01:32:02,355
- (grunts)
- TINA: Oh, no!
2556
01:32:02,397 --> 01:32:03,857
- Tabitha!
- (Armstrong grunting)
2557
01:32:03,898 --> 01:32:04,858
(grunts)
2558
01:32:04,899 --> 01:32:06,735
No! Someone help me, please!
2559
01:32:06,776 --> 01:32:08,695
Tabitha, hang on!
2560
01:32:08,737 --> 01:32:11,031
Ted, I need upsies... now.
2561
01:32:11,072 --> 01:32:12,782
(both grunt)
2562
01:32:12,824 --> 01:32:15,785
- (yelps, grunts)
- (Tabitha screaming)
2563
01:32:17,537 --> 01:32:19,205
Dad, help me!
2564
01:32:19,247 --> 01:32:20,331
Look at you.
2565
01:32:20,373 --> 01:32:22,208
You're smart. You're strong.
2566
01:32:22,250 --> 01:32:23,543
You don't need parents.
2567
01:32:23,585 --> 01:32:25,587
What can they possibly
offer you?
2568
01:32:25,628 --> 01:32:28,048
- How about unconditional love?
- (gasps, yells)
2569
01:32:28,089 --> 01:32:29,799
- That's what.
- No, no, no. No.
2570
01:32:29,841 --> 01:32:32,010
- Sayonara.
- No, no, no. No. (screams)
2571
01:32:33,595 --> 01:32:36,222
- (grunts)
- (Armstrong screams, whimpers)
2572
01:32:36,264 --> 01:32:37,599
TIM:
Tabitha!
2573
01:32:37,640 --> 01:32:39,392
(strained grunting)
2574
01:32:39,434 --> 01:32:41,353
(yells)
2575
01:32:41,394 --> 01:32:43,021
- I'm gonna fall!
- Tabitha!
2576
01:32:43,063 --> 01:32:44,230
Hang on!
2577
01:32:44,272 --> 01:32:45,607
(screams)
2578
01:32:45,648 --> 01:32:47,942
I got you. I got you.
2579
01:32:47,984 --> 01:32:49,778
(both sigh)
2580
01:32:49,819 --> 01:32:52,030
I got you, Tabitha.
2581
01:32:52,072 --> 01:32:54,657
(panting)
2582
01:32:54,699 --> 01:32:56,618
I got you.
2583
01:32:56,659 --> 01:32:59,162
That's my big brother.
2584
01:32:59,954 --> 01:33:02,957
Thanks, Marcos Lightspeed.
2585
01:33:05,001 --> 01:33:06,628
Mwah.
2586
01:33:07,462 --> 01:33:09,464
I thought we both
had to grow up.
2587
01:33:09,506 --> 01:33:11,925
Well, let's not
grow up too fast.
2588
01:33:11,966 --> 01:33:13,426
(sighs)
2589
01:33:13,468 --> 01:33:14,844
I love you, Dad.
2590
01:33:14,886 --> 01:33:16,763
I love you, Tabitha Templeton.
2591
01:33:16,805 --> 01:33:18,973
Aw. You see that?
2592
01:33:19,015 --> 01:33:21,267
And you wanted
to take it all away.
2593
01:33:21,309 --> 01:33:22,769
- Where you going?
- Home.
2594
01:33:22,811 --> 01:33:25,647
You know, Doc,
childhood doesn't last forever,
2595
01:33:25,689 --> 01:33:27,524
but family sure does.
2596
01:33:27,565 --> 01:33:29,275
Uncle Ted! Heads up!
2597
01:33:29,317 --> 01:33:31,069
- (screams, grunts)
- Woo-hoo!
2598
01:33:31,111 --> 01:33:33,446
We win! Get ready
to order some pizzas.
2599
01:33:33,488 --> 01:33:35,740
(Ted chuckling)
2600
01:33:37,659 --> 01:33:39,953
♪ ♪
2601
01:33:42,706 --> 01:33:44,290
(babies gasping)
2602
01:33:44,332 --> 01:33:45,917
(cheering)
2603
01:33:45,959 --> 01:33:47,043
Woo-hoo!
2604
01:33:47,085 --> 01:33:49,212
- (squeals)
- Cool! (laughs)
2605
01:33:50,338 --> 01:33:52,507
- (gasps)
- (murmuring)
2606
01:33:52,549 --> 01:33:54,551
(Wizzie laughing)
2607
01:33:54,592 --> 01:33:57,012
Huzzah! (laughs)
2608
01:33:57,053 --> 01:33:59,097
Huzzah!
2609
01:34:01,349 --> 01:34:03,601
- (sighs, grunts)
- (applause)
2610
01:34:03,643 --> 01:34:05,895
(cheering)
2611
01:34:08,189 --> 01:34:09,566
Oh, sweet.
2612
01:34:09,607 --> 01:34:11,651
He who findeth keepeth.
2613
01:34:11,693 --> 01:34:13,153
(clears throat)
2614
01:34:13,194 --> 01:34:14,237
(kids cheering)
2615
01:34:14,279 --> 01:34:17,699
Mommy, Daddy,
I missed you so much.
2616
01:34:17,741 --> 01:34:20,118
Ooh, ooh, ooh. Yay!
2617
01:34:20,160 --> 01:34:21,327
Junior!
2618
01:34:21,369 --> 01:34:23,121
- Glue!
- (Jimbo yelps)
2619
01:34:23,163 --> 01:34:25,248
So soft.
2620
01:34:25,290 --> 01:34:26,708
Where are we going?
2621
01:34:26,750 --> 01:34:28,001
Not bad, Templetons.
2622
01:34:28,043 --> 01:34:29,753
Woo-hoo! Yay, Templetons.
2623
01:34:29,794 --> 01:34:31,254
Yeah, mission accomplished.
2624
01:34:31,296 --> 01:34:34,424
And as a bonus,
we stopped Armstrong, too.
2625
01:34:34,466 --> 01:34:35,967
- Huh?
- What?
2626
01:34:36,009 --> 01:34:38,845
My real mission was
getting you two back together.
2627
01:34:38,887 --> 01:34:41,681
- A-plus! See me after class.
- (Tabitha chuckles)
2628
01:34:41,723 --> 01:34:43,433
Wait, so you never
actually quit?
2629
01:34:43,475 --> 01:34:44,684
- Nope.
- Huh.
2630
01:34:44,726 --> 01:34:45,852
Well played.
2631
01:34:45,894 --> 01:34:47,187
I don't like to mix the two,
2632
01:34:47,228 --> 01:34:48,730
but I will say
it was never business.
2633
01:34:48,772 --> 01:34:50,273
It was always personal.
2634
01:34:50,315 --> 01:34:51,649
You know what, kid?
2635
01:34:51,691 --> 01:34:53,943
You're the best boss I ever had.
2636
01:34:53,985 --> 01:34:55,570
- Thank you, chief.
- (Tabitha chuckles)
2637
01:34:55,612 --> 01:34:57,197
CAROL:
Tim! You actually made it.
2638
01:34:57,238 --> 01:34:59,407
- Yeah.
- I mean, I knew you'd make it.
2639
01:34:59,449 --> 01:35:01,076
- Teddy.
- Teddy, you're here.
2640
01:35:01,117 --> 01:35:03,244
- And look what you're wearing.
- Uh...
2641
01:35:03,286 --> 01:35:05,205
Sweetheart, I cried.
2642
01:35:05,246 --> 01:35:06,373
Then I went blank.
2643
01:35:06,414 --> 01:35:08,166
Oh, come on.
Every-Everyone get together.
2644
01:35:08,208 --> 01:35:10,043
This... We got to get this.
Here we go.
2645
01:35:10,085 --> 01:35:11,711
- Dad, no! -No!
- What?
2646
01:35:11,753 --> 01:35:13,213
(camera clicks)
2647
01:35:13,254 --> 01:35:14,339
(guitar playing)
2648
01:35:14,381 --> 01:35:15,632
TABITHA:
♪ We know that ♪
2649
01:35:15,674 --> 01:35:17,509
♪ Divided we'll fall ♪
2650
01:35:17,550 --> 01:35:22,931
♪ So together we stand ♪
2651
01:35:24,933 --> 01:35:27,727
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2652
01:35:27,769 --> 01:35:29,437
(camera clicks)
2653
01:35:29,479 --> 01:35:35,235
♪ So together we stand. ♪
2654
01:35:35,276 --> 01:35:37,112
- Yay, Tabitha!
- That was beautiful!
2655
01:35:37,153 --> 01:35:39,114
- The crowd goes wild!
- (Tina laughing)
2656
01:35:39,155 --> 01:35:41,408
(chuckles)
Thank you. Thank you.
2657
01:35:41,449 --> 01:35:42,742
- (whinnies)
- Aah!
2658
01:35:42,784 --> 01:35:44,411
Aw, hey, Precious.
2659
01:35:44,452 --> 01:35:45,787
(chuckles) You're amazing.
2660
01:35:45,829 --> 01:35:47,664
Oh, I wish Teddy
could have been here.
2661
01:35:47,706 --> 01:35:49,749
Yeah, I know. Me, too.
2662
01:35:49,791 --> 01:35:51,584
- (doorbell rings)
- (gasps)
2663
01:35:51,626 --> 01:35:53,461
- Hmm.
- (squealing)
2664
01:35:55,630 --> 01:35:57,257
Hey, I was just...
2665
01:36:03,930 --> 01:36:05,890
TED:
Merry Christmas, Tim.
2666
01:36:05,932 --> 01:36:08,101
I'm sorry I couldn't
be there with you,
2667
01:36:08,143 --> 01:36:10,437
but please enjoy this
2668
01:36:10,478 --> 01:36:13,148
inappropriately lavish gift
instead.
2669
01:36:18,820 --> 01:36:22,115
You've given me
the greatest gift of all.
2670
01:36:22,157 --> 01:36:23,825
- You.
- (chuckles)
2671
01:36:23,867 --> 01:36:27,287
Love, the best brother
in the world.
2672
01:36:27,328 --> 01:36:29,622
P.S. Duck.
2673
01:36:29,664 --> 01:36:31,458
(shouts)
2674
01:36:31,499 --> 01:36:34,127
(groaning, spitting)
2675
01:36:34,169 --> 01:36:35,462
In your face, Leslie!
2676
01:36:35,503 --> 01:36:37,255
(chuckling):
Hey. Oh, it is on, Lindsey!
2677
01:36:37,297 --> 01:36:39,758
-No. No, no, no, no. Don't,
don't, don't. -Come here!
2678
01:36:39,799 --> 01:36:40,967
I'm younger than you.
2679
01:36:41,009 --> 01:36:42,385
You're a bigger target.
2680
01:36:42,427 --> 01:36:43,988
- (laughs) I got you so good!
- (Ted grunts)
2681
01:36:44,012 --> 01:36:45,472
- (laughing)
- TED: No, you didn't.
2682
01:36:45,513 --> 01:36:46,806
Aah! You missed me!
2683
01:36:46,848 --> 01:36:48,475
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
2684
01:36:48,516 --> 01:36:49,893
- Ambush.
- Exactly.
2685
01:36:49,934 --> 01:36:51,353
- TIM: Ow!
- TED: Sneak attack!
2686
01:36:51,394 --> 01:36:53,480
Oh, isn't it great
to see them fighting again?
2687
01:36:53,521 --> 01:36:54,814
(sighs) Finally.
2688
01:36:54,856 --> 01:36:56,483
(toy phone ringing)
2689
01:36:57,817 --> 01:36:59,527
Shouldn't you pick up?
2690
01:36:59,569 --> 01:37:01,488
Nah, we got some
family business.
2691
01:37:01,529 --> 01:37:03,031
Woo-hoo! Yeah!
2692
01:37:03,073 --> 01:37:05,200
- (Carol gasps)
- (ringing continues)
2693
01:37:07,786 --> 01:37:10,372
CHILD (on phone): Tina, we have
another assignment for you.
2694
01:37:10,413 --> 01:37:12,123
(gasps, whispers):
I'm listening.
2695
01:37:12,165 --> 01:37:14,167
JANICE:
Grandma's coming in hot!
2696
01:37:14,209 --> 01:37:16,753
- You want some of Grandpa?
- Everyone, get Tagalong Teddy!
2697
01:37:16,795 --> 01:37:18,505
- TIM: It's true.
- Gotcha!
2698
01:37:18,546 --> 01:37:20,215
You can't stop time.
2699
01:37:20,256 --> 01:37:22,592
But every once in a while,
you get a second chance.
2700
01:37:22,634 --> 01:37:24,403
- TABITHA: I'm gonna get you!
- (Precious neighs)
2701
01:37:24,427 --> 01:37:26,072
TIM: So, even though
you're only a kid once...
2702
01:37:26,096 --> 01:37:27,889
well, unless you get
to be a kid twice,
2703
01:37:27,931 --> 01:37:30,141
which is really weird,
to be honest,
2704
01:37:30,183 --> 01:37:33,144
but the point is
you have to grow up sometime.
2705
01:37:33,186 --> 01:37:35,397
- (Wizzie laughing)
- (camera clicks)
2706
01:37:35,438 --> 01:37:38,149
And you should always
be nice to your brother.
2707
01:37:38,191 --> 01:37:40,235
TINA: Ah,
that was really sweet, Daddy.
2708
01:37:40,276 --> 01:37:42,112
That'll be great for my report.
2709
01:37:42,153 --> 01:37:44,322
TIM:
Okay, so... so that's it, then.
2710
01:37:44,364 --> 01:37:47,075
TINA: Well, actually,
there's one more little thing.
2711
01:37:48,702 --> 01:37:50,954
♪ ♪
2712
01:37:59,879 --> 01:38:01,464
(door opens)
2713
01:38:02,590 --> 01:38:04,634
Mama? Papa?
2714
01:38:04,676 --> 01:38:05,969
DAD:
Wha...
2715
01:38:06,011 --> 01:38:09,097
- (gasps) Oh, my son.
- (mom gasping)
2716
01:38:09,139 --> 01:38:11,558
- (dad sobbing)
- (mom laughing)
2717
01:38:11,599 --> 01:38:13,685
MOM:
You came home.
2718
01:38:13,727 --> 01:38:15,729
TIM:
Oh, yeah. Right.
2719
01:38:15,770 --> 01:38:17,564
TINA:
Okay, Pops. Now.
2720
01:38:17,605 --> 01:38:19,858
TIM:
The end.
2721
01:38:19,899 --> 01:38:23,111
("Together We Stand" playing)
2722
01:38:31,911 --> 01:38:34,164
(children's chorus vocalizing)
2723
01:39:03,985 --> 01:39:06,196
♪ ♪
2724
01:39:15,663 --> 01:39:18,458
TABITHA:
♪ Catch my eye ♪
2725
01:39:18,500 --> 01:39:21,252
♪ Take my hand ♪
2726
01:39:21,294 --> 01:39:26,633
♪ This bond is tighter
than we ever planned ♪
2727
01:39:26,675 --> 01:39:29,052
♪ Give me courage ♪
2728
01:39:29,094 --> 01:39:31,429
♪ So I can land ♪
2729
01:39:31,471 --> 01:39:35,016
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2730
01:39:35,058 --> 01:39:39,104
♪ So together we stand ♪
2731
01:39:40,188 --> 01:39:42,774
♪ Climb with me ♪
2732
01:39:42,816 --> 01:39:45,819
♪ Share my dreams ♪
2733
01:39:45,860 --> 01:39:47,612
♪ Tomorrow's brighter ♪
2734
01:39:47,654 --> 01:39:50,907
♪ Than it's ever been ♪
2735
01:39:50,949 --> 01:39:53,660
♪ Fear no danger ♪
2736
01:39:53,702 --> 01:39:56,037
♪ Make big plans ♪
2737
01:39:56,079 --> 01:39:59,708
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2738
01:39:59,749 --> 01:40:04,629
♪ So together we stand ♪
2739
01:40:04,671 --> 01:40:07,799
♪ Laugh and cry with me ♪
2740
01:40:07,841 --> 01:40:10,051
♪ Fly that high with me ♪
2741
01:40:10,093 --> 01:40:13,013
♪ See the sunset
and the sunrise ♪
2742
01:40:13,054 --> 01:40:15,724
♪ The world looks so good
through our eyes ♪
2743
01:40:15,765 --> 01:40:17,600
♪ Like the moon ♪
2744
01:40:17,642 --> 01:40:19,811
♪ And stars at night ♪
2745
01:40:21,062 --> 01:40:23,815
♪ Rest your head ♪
2746
01:40:23,857 --> 01:40:26,526
♪ Tell me your thoughts ♪
2747
01:40:26,568 --> 01:40:29,779
♪ Everything I have
and call mine ♪
2748
01:40:29,821 --> 01:40:31,948
♪ Is all yours ♪
2749
01:40:31,990 --> 01:40:34,743
♪ Sail that ocean ♪
2750
01:40:34,784 --> 01:40:37,203
♪ Find that sand ♪
2751
01:40:37,245 --> 01:40:40,707
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2752
01:40:40,749 --> 01:40:45,045
♪ So together we stand ♪
2753
01:40:45,086 --> 01:40:47,339
(children's chorus vocalizing)
2754
01:41:04,731 --> 01:41:07,275
♪ Reach with me ♪
2755
01:41:07,317 --> 01:41:10,362
♪ See the sky ♪
2756
01:41:10,403 --> 01:41:15,575
♪ I'll always be here
for the rest of your life ♪
2757
01:41:15,617 --> 01:41:18,286
♪ Side by side ♪
2758
01:41:18,328 --> 01:41:20,914
♪ Hand in hand ♪
2759
01:41:20,955 --> 01:41:26,670
♪ We speak a language
no one else can understand ♪
2760
01:41:26,711 --> 01:41:29,172
♪ Hear those cheers ♪
2761
01:41:29,214 --> 01:41:31,633
♪ Strike up the band ♪
2762
01:41:31,675 --> 01:41:35,053
♪ We know that
divided we'll fall ♪
2763
01:41:35,095 --> 01:41:40,600
♪ So together we stand ♪
2764
01:41:42,310 --> 01:41:44,145
♪ We know that ♪
2765
01:41:44,187 --> 01:41:46,773
♪ Divided we'll fall ♪
2766
01:41:46,815 --> 01:41:53,988
♪ So together we stand. ♪
2767
01:41:54,030 --> 01:41:56,825
(song ends)
2768
01:41:59,825 --> 01:42:03,825
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