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>> Bibs! Dawg!
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Hurry up with the eggs.
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>> How many times I gotta tell
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ya I ain't no cook, I ain't
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no caddy, and I ain't no pimp.
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I ain't washed my hands neither.
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>> TASHA: Malik! Malik!
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What the hell is goin' on with
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this damn house?
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The damn topiary is lookin'
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a hot-ass mess, especially
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the one shaped after me.
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Hell, my hair ain't been that
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nappy since the '70s.
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>> Mom, you ain't worn your hair
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since the '70s.
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>> Boy, where the hell is your
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gardener?
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Mr. Hadashida had
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a topiary expo.
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>> Mm-hm.
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>> Something about some bushes,
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bonsais and something else.
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>> Baby, I told you to go
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Mexican.
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Hell, they love work.
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>> BOTH: [laughing]
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>> What can I do you for, Mom?
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>> All right, J.J. Abrams--
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his son is having bar mitzvah.
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Malik, they just want you to
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throw the football around
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just for a little bit,
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all right?
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Come on.
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Look, technically it is not
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a birthday, all right, it's
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a Jewish right to passage, okay?
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It's $100,000 and then,
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you know, all you gotta do is
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say yay or nay.
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>> I'm in.
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>> Really?
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>> Yeah.
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>> What's goin' on with you?
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>> Mom, there ain't nothin'
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goin' on with me.
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>> Malik--
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>> I just don't want to block
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all the hard work you've been
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doing, that's all.
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>> Good. Good. All right.
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And you know what?
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You need to stop lettin'
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these employees run you.
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Hell, they work for you, baby.
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>> That's right.
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>> All right?
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>> All right?
>> ♪
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>> ♪
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>> [cell phone ringing]
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>> Hello?
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Hey.
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Are you almost home?
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Wait. What? Huh?
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Baby, say that again.
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>> I said I got the Verizon
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endorsement.
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Can you hear me now?
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>> Oh! Oh, my God!
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>> DERWIN: [laughing]
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Wait, Derwin, how did this
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happen?
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>> Yeah!
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>> I thought the Verizon deal
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thing went away with Tasha.
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>> It did, but Irv hooked it
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back up.
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>> Well, how did Irv hook
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it back up?
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>> Easy!
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He's my manager now.
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>> So you re-signed with Irv?
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>> Hm-hm, yep, right after you
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let Tasha go.
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So we're all good. Dallas.
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>> Dallas?
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>> Mm-hm, it's back on TV.
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Just like me and Irv are back.
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>> Stop with all the sayings
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and stop not letting me in on
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all of your decisions.
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>> What you talkin' about?
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Hold on a second.
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You wanted in on that?
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Yeah, Mel, my bad.
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I didn't think it was that deep.
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Koi pond.
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>> Wait, because a pond
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isn't deep?
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Stop it!
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Look, Derwin, whatever happened
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to, Melanie, you are the C.E.O.
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of this family.
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If I am, indeed, the C.E.O.
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of Davis Inc., don't you think
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I should know little things like
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who's managing you?
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Oh! Oh!
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And what about the truth thing,
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Derwin?
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You didn't do the truth thing
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about Irv.
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>> Okay, fine, so you want
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the truth?
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You want the full Nicholson-
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Cruise?
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>> Yes, I can handle the truth,
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Derwin.
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>> Okay, you are C.E.O. of
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this family, but Irv's C.E.O.
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of his business.
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>> Well, I was C.E.O. of
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the business when I had to fire
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Tasha for you.
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>> Well, the point is, Irv is
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a professional.
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>> Who dumped you.
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>> So what, Melanie.
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Irv dumped me.
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But he dumped me because he's
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a winner and I wasn't winning,
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but now I am.
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Matter of fact, I'm so winning,
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I'm Charlie Sheenin' it and if
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Irv starts losing, we will dump
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his ass like we did Tasha.
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>> Well, so much for loyalty.
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>> Hey, baby, the only one
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I gotta be loyal to is you
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and D.J. and maybe grandmama--
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and kinda Janay.
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>> What, Janay?
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>> Ow! Yeah.
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You know what?
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You know what, Mel,
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you're right--screw Janay.
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She ain't part of this legacy.
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Matter of fact, when the story
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of Derwin "Ding Dong" Davis
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is told, she will be a mere
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footnote.
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>> I'm talking about my role
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in this legacy.
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>> You talkin' about bein'
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my manager now?
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>> Maybe.
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If Tasha can do it,
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a monkey can do it.
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And I can say that because
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I am Black.
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[snapping fingers]
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>> You're about as qualified
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to be Black...
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[snapping fingers]
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as you are my manager.
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>> I know what you think
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I'm qualified to do.
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>> [giggling]
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>> And maybe I won't do it
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any more.
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>> Hm, wait a minute.
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>> Mm-hm.
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>> Could you possibly be talkin'
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about, girl...
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You cannot possibly be talkin'
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about negotiating with your
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vajayjay 'cause you know that
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would be wrong.
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You know how I get when I--
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>> Sometimes a woman has to
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play hardball.
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>> Fine!
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Okay, since you feel that
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strongly about it, perhaps
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I'll let you oversee Irv.
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>> What do you mean oversee him?
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Like be the boss of him?
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>> Yes.
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You're the boss of him, just
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like you're the boss of me.
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>> Okay.
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Congratulations.
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You just got yourself one barely
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used vajayjay.
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>> Girl, please, barely?
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>> Girl, please, barely?
>> What?
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>> What?
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>> Do you know why I called
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you in here, Doug?
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You messed up.
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Oh, you messed up real big.
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I know you saw the topiary
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out front, didn't you?
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>> You mean the one of the fat
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lady with the Afro?
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>> That's supposed to be
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my mama.
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Damn you, Doug!
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Mr. Hadashida quit.
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Why didn't you pay him?
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>> Because you have no money.
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>> I have no money? I--
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Doug, I have no money?
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What do you call that, Doug, hm?
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>> That's chump change compared
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to what you owe.
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Yeah, you signed an $80 million
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contract, but the government
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gets half of that, so you're
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down to forty.
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Then you go and build
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a $40 million house.
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>> Okay, I get it.
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Bibs is just gonna have to
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keep cookin' and I'ma just have
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to trim my own damn hedges.
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How about that?
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>> We're gonna have to do
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a little bit more than that,
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Malik.
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>> Doug, didn't I just tell you
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I'ma trim my own damn bushes?
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>> I'm putting you on a budget--
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$25,000.
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>> A day?
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>> A month.
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>> I'll kill you, Doug!
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Can't put gas in one of
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my babies, let alone two!
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>> Okay, and speaking of
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your babies...
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your babies...
>> N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
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>> N-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!
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>> Irv, you're late.
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>> I'm always late.
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It's how I do.
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Oh, this is, uh, Lola.
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>> Hi.
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>> You look nice.
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Very, uh, C.E.O.y.
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>> Well, I am the C.E.O. of--
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>> So you've gotta dress
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the part.
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Walks like a pig,
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smells like a pig.
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I get it. Take a seat.
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>> So, we are really excited
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about Derwin and Verizon
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and I was thinking, since it
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opens up so many opportunities--
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>> [coughing loudly]
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>> ...we should...
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>> [coughing continues]
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>> ...talk about...
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>> Do you have any water?
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>> Do you have any water?
>> Uh, sure.
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>> Uh, sure.
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Here you go.
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>> Without lemon.
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>> Oh.
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So, I was saying that--
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>> Know what?
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Maybe a little lemon.
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>> Um, about the other
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opportunities, I think--
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>> Oh, do you have any snacks?
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>> Happy?!
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>> You know what?
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I would be happier with some
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spicy tuna.
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>> Derwin should do
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Jimmy Fallon.
284
00:06:52,172 --> 00:06:53,482
>> I am listening.
285
00:06:53,482 --> 00:06:54,762
>> Okay, well, Fallon's numbers
286
00:06:54,758 --> 00:06:56,068
are growing and he really gets
287
00:06:56,068 --> 00:06:57,308
Derwin's demographic.
288
00:06:57,310 --> 00:06:58,070
>> Brilliant.
289
00:06:58,068 --> 00:06:58,858
Lola, call Letterman's people
290
00:06:58,862 --> 00:07:00,242
and book Derwin.
291
00:07:00,241 --> 00:07:01,171
>> You mean Fallon.
292
00:07:01,172 --> 00:07:02,002
>> I mean Letterman.
293
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:02,790
Derwin already has Fallon's
294
00:07:02,793 --> 00:07:03,553
audience.
295
00:07:03,551 --> 00:07:04,451
Now let's get Letterman.
296
00:07:04,448 --> 00:07:06,278
Oh, yes, great idea, kiddo.
297
00:07:06,275 --> 00:07:07,545
>> [cell phone ringing]
298
00:07:07,551 --> 00:07:08,241
>> But it was your idea.
299
00:07:08,241 --> 00:07:09,621
>> Oh, no, but you planted
300
00:07:09,620 --> 00:07:10,380
the seed, you little
301
00:07:10,379 --> 00:07:11,479
seed-planter, you.
302
00:07:11,482 --> 00:07:12,452
>> [cell phone ringing]
303
00:07:12,448 --> 00:07:13,968
>> Hello?
304
00:07:13,965 --> 00:07:14,825
Oh.
305
00:07:14,827 --> 00:07:16,207
It's Tasha Mack calling again
306
00:07:16,206 --> 00:07:18,136
It's Tasha Mack calling again
regarding the Verizon deal.
307
00:07:18,137 --> 00:07:21,167
regarding the Verizon deal.
308
00:07:21,172 --> 00:07:23,312
>> You can pry it from my cold,
309
00:07:23,310 --> 00:07:26,210
dead hands.
310
00:07:26,206 --> 00:07:27,166
Mm-hm.
311
00:07:27,172 --> 00:07:28,002
Mm-hm.
312
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:29,280
Mmmm.
313
00:07:29,275 --> 00:07:30,095
All right.
314
00:07:30,103 --> 00:07:32,833
Kisses.
315
00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:34,307
>> So why is Tasha calling
316
00:07:34,310 --> 00:07:35,170
about that?
317
00:07:35,172 --> 00:07:36,072
>> Oh, that's no biggie.
318
00:07:36,068 --> 00:07:36,998
A little something about her
319
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,000
initiating the deal and wanting
320
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,000
to sue me and Derwin.
321
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:40,000
Oh, yes, and she wants to stick
322
00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,000
her foot in my ass, blah,
323
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:41,930
blah, blah, ass, ass, blah,
324
00:07:41,931 --> 00:07:42,721
ass, ass, blah.
325
00:07:42,724 --> 00:07:43,834
>> And when were you gonna
326
00:07:43,827 --> 00:07:44,827
tell me about this?
327
00:07:44,827 --> 00:07:46,307
>> Melanie, sweetie, gorgeous,
328
00:07:46,310 --> 00:07:48,930
you are C.E.O., okay?
329
00:07:48,931 --> 00:07:50,031
You don't have time for petty
330
00:07:50,034 --> 00:07:51,414
hooligans like Tasha Mack.
331
00:07:51,413 --> 00:07:52,413
Now you stick with your
332
00:07:52,413 --> 00:07:53,523
C.E.O.'ing and your big ideas
333
00:07:53,517 --> 00:07:55,207
and I'll sweat the small stuff.
334
00:07:55,206 --> 00:07:56,446
Oh, look at this, Tasha took
335
00:07:56,448 --> 00:07:57,278
up all your time.
336
00:07:57,275 --> 00:07:58,305
Damn you, Tasha.
337
00:07:58,310 --> 00:07:59,280
Now, save your list and...
338
00:07:59,275 --> 00:08:00,335
[snapping fingers]
339
00:08:00,344 --> 00:08:01,214
we'll touch base later.
340
00:08:01,206 --> 00:08:03,136
we'll touch base later.
Lola, come!
341
00:08:03,137 --> 00:08:05,137
Lola, come!
342
00:08:05,137 --> 00:08:07,207
Lola, come!
>> Thank you.
343
00:08:07,206 --> 00:08:09,686
>> Thank you.
344
00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:11,999
>> No, no remorse when
345
00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,100
strippin' a Black man
346
00:08:13,103 --> 00:08:14,243
of his kids.
347
00:08:14,241 --> 00:08:16,171
It's "Roots" all over again.
348
00:08:16,172 --> 00:08:17,072
>> They're just cars.
349
00:08:17,068 --> 00:08:17,998
>> They're just what? What?
350
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:19,210
What do you love, Doug?
351
00:08:19,206 --> 00:08:20,616
>> I love my partner.
352
00:08:20,620 --> 00:08:21,550
I love the two boys we adopted
353
00:08:21,551 --> 00:08:22,831
from Cambodia.
354
00:08:22,827 --> 00:08:24,097
I love the Winter Olympics.
355
00:08:24,103 --> 00:08:26,483
>> Shut up. Ah, this guy.
356
00:08:26,482 --> 00:08:27,592
>> How much is that shirt?
357
00:08:27,586 --> 00:08:28,376
Four hundred?
358
00:08:28,379 --> 00:08:29,209
>> It's two seasons old.
359
00:08:29,206 --> 00:08:29,996
>> Are you still wearing
360
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:30,790
cashmere underwear?
361
00:08:30,793 --> 00:08:31,693
>> I bought it last month.
362
00:08:31,689 --> 00:08:32,339
>> Cashmere underwear?
363
00:08:32,344 --> 00:08:33,384
>> Dude.
364
00:08:33,379 --> 00:08:34,099
>> Hey.
365
00:08:34,102 --> 00:08:34,902
>> What's goin' on, Doug?
366
00:08:34,895 --> 00:08:35,655
>> Hey.
367
00:08:35,655 --> 00:08:36,375
>> So where'd they take your
368
00:08:36,379 --> 00:08:37,029
rides, Malik?
369
00:08:37,034 --> 00:08:37,864
>> Aw, dawg, you know, I had to
370
00:08:37,861 --> 00:08:38,521
get rid of 'em.
371
00:08:38,517 --> 00:08:39,277
They don't match my eyes.
372
00:08:39,275 --> 00:08:39,995
You know me.
373
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,310
>> Yeah, a solid reason.
374
00:08:41,309 --> 00:08:42,239
Doug, if that Google stock keeps
375
00:08:42,241 --> 00:08:43,411
climbin' the way you said it
376
00:08:43,413 --> 00:08:44,283
would, I'm gonna have $5 mil in
377
00:08:44,275 --> 00:08:45,655
trust by the next fiscal year.
378
00:08:45,655 --> 00:08:46,515
>> It's gonna happen.
379
00:08:46,517 --> 00:08:47,517
>> Do I have Google?
380
00:08:47,517 --> 00:08:48,407
>> You opted for a Crocodile
381
00:08:48,413 --> 00:08:49,763
Rolex.
382
00:08:49,758 --> 00:08:51,688
Hey, happy birthday, Tee Tee.
383
00:08:51,689 --> 00:08:52,549
>> Oh, hey, man.
384
00:08:52,551 --> 00:08:53,721
Thanks for rememberin'.
385
00:08:53,724 --> 00:08:54,624
>> Yeah, is that your present?
386
00:08:54,620 --> 00:08:55,900
>> Yeah, yeah, you like it?
387
00:08:55,896 --> 00:08:56,966
Um, I just thought I'd treat
388
00:08:56,965 --> 00:08:57,715
myself.
389
00:08:57,724 --> 00:08:58,594
You like it, Malik?
390
00:08:58,586 --> 00:08:59,276
>> What, your sweatshirt
391
00:08:59,275 --> 00:09:00,235
or your car?
392
00:09:00,241 --> 00:09:00,971
>> Ah.
393
00:09:00,965 --> 00:09:01,685
Hey, come on, I'll give y'all
394
00:09:01,689 --> 00:09:02,209
a ride.
395
00:09:02,206 --> 00:09:03,066
>> Nah, I'll pass. I'm good.
396
00:09:03,068 --> 00:09:03,788
>> I'll go.
397
00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:04,663
>> All right, cool, come on.
398
00:09:04,655 --> 00:09:05,685
Oh, Malik, you got me for
399
00:09:05,689 --> 00:09:07,139
my birthday, though, right?
400
00:09:07,137 --> 00:09:08,337
>> It's your birthday, dawg.
401
00:09:08,344 --> 00:09:09,764
Come on, you know I got you.
402
00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:10,478
>> 'Cause you know I'm trying
403
00:09:10,482 --> 00:09:11,242
to do it big.
404
00:09:11,241 --> 00:09:12,211
>> Tee Tee, don't I always
405
00:09:12,206 --> 00:09:12,966
pay, huh?
406
00:09:12,965 --> 00:09:14,235
You know I got you--
407
00:09:14,241 --> 00:09:14,901
>> Malik.
408
00:09:14,896 --> 00:09:15,716
>> I'll snap your neck.
409
00:09:15,724 --> 00:09:16,834
Control it.
410
00:09:16,827 --> 00:09:17,657
You two lovebirds go ahead, man.
411
00:09:17,655 --> 00:09:18,585
Y'all have fun.
412
00:09:18,586 --> 00:09:19,616
>> TEE TEE: All right, don't
413
00:09:19,620 --> 00:09:20,340
let me down.
414
00:09:20,344 --> 00:09:21,144
>> It's all good, man.
415
00:09:21,137 --> 00:09:22,337
>> It's all good, man.
I'ma be here.
416
00:09:22,344 --> 00:09:24,694
I'ma be here.
417
00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:26,789
>> You're late. Disrespectful.
418
00:09:26,793 --> 00:09:28,663
>> You're early. Desperate.
419
00:09:28,655 --> 00:09:29,445
>> You know, the only thing
420
00:09:29,448 --> 00:09:30,378
desperate is your punk-ass
421
00:09:30,379 --> 00:09:31,519
attempt to steal my money.
422
00:09:31,517 --> 00:09:32,997
>> Your money, ha!
423
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:33,760
Look, everyone can put
424
00:09:33,758 --> 00:09:35,028
the condom on, darlin',
425
00:09:35,034 --> 00:09:35,834
but not everyone can get
426
00:09:35,827 --> 00:09:36,997
the pants off.
427
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:37,860
>> Okay, wait, let me get
428
00:09:37,862 --> 00:09:38,622
this right.
429
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:39,590
So, you finish before you get
430
00:09:39,586 --> 00:09:40,756
your pants off?
431
00:09:40,758 --> 00:09:42,308
>> [exaggerated laughter]
432
00:09:42,310 --> 00:09:45,030
Ah, Tasha, I've missed you.
433
00:09:45,034 --> 00:09:48,004
>> Oh, you always do, don't you?
434
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:48,720
>> Shall we get this party
435
00:09:48,724 --> 00:09:49,454
started?
436
00:09:49,448 --> 00:09:50,068
>> TASHA: Okay.
437
00:09:50,068 --> 00:09:50,928
>> IRV: Absolutely.
438
00:09:50,931 --> 00:09:53,411
>> Not so fast.
439
00:09:53,413 --> 00:09:54,763
>> And who are you?
440
00:09:54,758 --> 00:09:56,478
>> Dr. Melanie Barnett-Davis,
441
00:09:56,482 --> 00:09:57,862
C.E.O. of Derwin Davis
442
00:09:57,862 --> 00:09:59,522
Enterprises.
443
00:09:59,517 --> 00:10:00,617
>> [exaggerated sigh]
444
00:10:00,620 --> 00:10:01,930
What are you doing here?
445
00:10:01,931 --> 00:10:02,721
I told you not to worry
446
00:10:02,724 --> 00:10:03,554
about this.
447
00:10:03,551 --> 00:10:04,311
>> Yeah, and I told you I wanted
448
00:10:04,310 --> 00:10:05,310
to be in the loop on everything,
449
00:10:05,310 --> 00:10:06,660
but obviously you didn't take
450
00:10:06,655 --> 00:10:07,855
me very seriously.
451
00:10:07,862 --> 00:10:10,592
I am very serious, Mr. Smiff.
452
00:10:10,586 --> 00:10:11,516
>> You should really let me
453
00:10:11,517 --> 00:10:12,407
handle this.
454
00:10:12,413 --> 00:10:13,173
[whispering]
455
00:10:13,172 --> 00:10:13,972
She will bury you.
456
00:10:13,965 --> 00:10:15,095
>> Oh, pshaw.
457
00:10:15,103 --> 00:10:16,103
Look, Tasha and I, we may have
458
00:10:16,103 --> 00:10:17,003
our differences, but we are both
459
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,280
adults.
460
00:10:18,275 --> 00:10:19,545
We can handle this in a civil
461
00:10:19,551 --> 00:10:22,001
manner, right, Tasha?
462
00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,170
>> Oh, we can be as civil as
463
00:10:23,172 --> 00:10:24,592
a lesbian weddin'.
464
00:10:24,586 --> 00:10:25,996
a lesbian weddin'.
Long as I get my paper.
465
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:29,340
Long as I get my paper.
466
00:10:29,344 --> 00:10:30,764
>> Look, Tasha, we know that you
467
00:10:30,758 --> 00:10:32,378
weren't really responsible for
468
00:10:32,379 --> 00:10:33,719
the endorsements.
469
00:10:33,724 --> 00:10:35,074
You may have started our
470
00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,448
relationship with Verizon,
471
00:10:36,448 --> 00:10:38,168
but it was Irv who got the money
472
00:10:38,172 --> 00:10:39,072
on the barrel.
473
00:10:39,068 --> 00:10:40,098
>> Right, so what I--
474
00:10:40,103 --> 00:10:41,343
>> But I am prepared to offer
475
00:10:41,344 --> 00:10:42,284
you what I think is more than
476
00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:43,025
a generous deduction fee for
477
00:10:43,034 --> 00:10:47,934
making initial contact.
478
00:10:47,931 --> 00:10:52,861
This number is non-negotiable.
479
00:10:52,862 --> 00:10:54,382
This number is non-negotiable.
>> [quiet chuckle]
480
00:10:54,379 --> 00:11:08,069
>> [quiet chuckle]
481
00:11:08,068 --> 00:11:11,688
This some good stuff.
482
00:11:11,689 --> 00:11:12,999
And that's what this is--
483
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,000
some bull.
484
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:15,930
I got some numbers, too,
485
00:11:15,931 --> 00:11:18,071
little girl.
486
00:11:18,068 --> 00:11:19,998
Now this first set of numbers
487
00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,310
are calls that I made to
488
00:11:21,310 --> 00:11:23,140
Verizon's C.E.O. office.
489
00:11:23,137 --> 00:11:24,477
Note that I called them over
490
00:11:24,482 --> 00:11:26,522
100 times bartering this deal.
491
00:11:26,517 --> 00:11:27,657
>> Yeah, but that doesn't mean
492
00:11:27,655 --> 00:11:28,715
they took your calls or even
493
00:11:28,724 --> 00:11:29,864
called you back.
494
00:11:29,862 --> 00:11:31,002
>> The second set of numbers
495
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,170
I have are incoming calls
496
00:11:32,172 --> 00:11:34,622
from Verizon's C.E.O. to me.
497
00:11:34,620 --> 00:11:36,280
Oh, and before you start
498
00:11:36,275 --> 00:11:37,275
hypothesizing on what was said,
499
00:11:37,275 --> 00:11:38,655
I also have the transcripts
500
00:11:38,655 --> 00:11:40,135
of our conversations which
501
00:11:40,137 --> 00:11:42,167
explicitly spell out the setting
502
00:11:42,172 --> 00:11:43,172
of how the endorsement deal
503
00:11:43,172 --> 00:11:46,002
was done.
504
00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:49,000
And this last number is yours
505
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,000
and a text message that reads,
506
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:51,830
and I quote:
507
00:11:51,827 --> 00:11:53,067
"Great job on the Verizon
508
00:11:53,068 --> 00:11:53,998
"deal, girl.
509
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,830
"You are my hero.
510
00:11:55,827 --> 00:11:59,997
XOXOXO M.B.-D."
511
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,030
Which either stands for
512
00:12:01,034 --> 00:12:02,174
Melanie Barnett-Davis
513
00:12:02,172 --> 00:12:03,792
or Might Have Been a Doctor
514
00:12:03,793 --> 00:12:06,623
or Mega bougie--
515
00:12:06,620 --> 00:12:08,340
>> Respond.
516
00:12:08,344 --> 00:12:09,314
>> [silently] Hello.
517
00:12:09,310 --> 00:12:10,000
>> [clapping hands]
518
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:11,930
I'm out.
519
00:12:11,931 --> 00:12:16,001
>> MELANIE: [laughing]
520
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:17,860
Um, look, Tasha, I know we,
521
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,552
you know, uh, haven't been
522
00:12:19,551 --> 00:12:20,591
on the best of terms lately.
523
00:12:20,586 --> 00:12:21,786
But in the name of our
524
00:12:21,793 --> 00:12:24,523
friendship and our history,
525
00:12:24,517 --> 00:12:26,307
I think we can come to
526
00:12:26,310 --> 00:12:27,930
an amicable con...con...
527
00:12:27,931 --> 00:12:30,481
conclusion here, right?
528
00:12:30,482 --> 00:12:31,902
Right?
529
00:12:31,896 --> 00:12:33,756
Right?
530
00:12:33,758 --> 00:12:35,448
What do you think?
531
00:12:35,448 --> 00:12:36,858
>> Do you have a verdict or do
532
00:12:36,862 --> 00:12:38,032
I need to set something else in
533
00:12:38,034 --> 00:12:39,974
here on fire?
534
00:12:39,965 --> 00:12:41,275
>> Ms. Mack is hereby ordered
535
00:12:41,275 --> 00:12:43,405
to receive her original 10%
536
00:12:43,413 --> 00:12:44,973
of all earnings derived from
537
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:45,995
the collaboration between
538
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,210
Verizon and Derwin Davis
539
00:12:47,206 --> 00:12:48,616
Enterprises.
540
00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:49,590
>> TASHA: Ah!
541
00:12:49,586 --> 00:12:50,656
>> In perpetuity.
542
00:12:50,655 --> 00:12:53,785
>> Mm!
543
00:12:53,793 --> 00:12:56,003
Well, it looks like my job
544
00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:58,170
here is done.
545
00:12:58,172 --> 00:13:00,762
Irv, always a pleasure.
546
00:13:00,758 --> 00:13:01,788
>> IRV: Mmm.
547
00:13:01,793 --> 00:13:03,593
>> Little girl, why don't you go
548
00:13:03,586 --> 00:13:05,996
home and cook your man some
549
00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:07,970
chicken and maybe have you
550
00:13:07,965 --> 00:13:08,995
a baby.
551
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:10,720
But, oh, wait, I forgot.
552
00:13:10,724 --> 00:13:12,414
You can't do neither one.
553
00:13:12,413 --> 00:13:13,833
[laughing]
554
00:13:13,827 --> 00:13:16,067
[laughing]
Don't come for me.
555
00:13:16,068 --> 00:13:19,588
Don't come for me.
556
00:13:19,586 --> 00:13:20,446
>> MALIK: What the hell?
557
00:13:20,448 --> 00:13:21,448
Since when a bottle of Cristal
558
00:13:21,448 --> 00:13:22,758
cost $900?
559
00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:23,588
>> I don't know why you don't
560
00:13:23,586 --> 00:13:24,336
just tell Tee Tee your money
561
00:13:24,344 --> 00:13:25,174
tight.
562
00:13:25,172 --> 00:13:26,072
>> Ha!
563
00:13:26,068 --> 00:13:26,928
Please, first rule of ballers'
564
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,001
etiquette--he who has the most
565
00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:29,140
money pays.
566
00:13:29,137 --> 00:13:30,167
>> Not any more.
567
00:13:30,172 --> 00:13:30,972
>> Nero, please.
568
00:13:30,965 --> 00:13:31,785
Even as broke as I am,
569
00:13:31,793 --> 00:13:32,623
I can still buy and sell
570
00:13:32,620 --> 00:13:33,590
Tee Tee.
571
00:13:33,586 --> 00:13:34,826
Hell, I have bought and sold
572
00:13:34,827 --> 00:13:36,207
Tee Tee.
573
00:13:36,206 --> 00:13:38,476
Got my baller's rep to protect.
574
00:13:38,482 --> 00:13:41,412
Oh, the birthday boy. Ah!
575
00:13:41,413 --> 00:13:42,143
>> Bibs.
576
00:13:42,137 --> 00:13:42,997
>> Yourself.
577
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:43,720
>> You got dressed up for
578
00:13:43,724 --> 00:13:44,524
this one, huh?
579
00:13:44,517 --> 00:13:45,167
>> I'm trying, you know.
580
00:13:45,172 --> 00:13:45,902
>> Little birdie told us it
581
00:13:45,896 --> 00:13:46,546
was your birthday.
582
00:13:46,551 --> 00:13:47,311
>> Did the little birdie tell
583
00:13:47,310 --> 00:13:48,030
you I'm a raging alcoholic,
584
00:13:48,034 --> 00:13:48,904
huh?
585
00:13:48,896 --> 00:13:49,716
Get that poison outta my face
586
00:13:49,724 --> 00:13:50,594
and off my bill.
587
00:13:50,586 --> 00:13:51,616
>> I'm sorry, Mr. Wright,
588
00:13:51,620 --> 00:13:52,550
it's compliments of the house,
589
00:13:52,551 --> 00:13:53,691
but I'd be happy to take
590
00:13:53,689 --> 00:13:54,379
it back.
591
00:13:54,379 --> 00:13:55,239
>> Oh, oh, no, no, no, no.
592
00:13:55,241 --> 00:13:56,721
I just...'cause I'm a drunk
593
00:13:56,724 --> 00:13:57,934
don't mean my boys can't drink.
594
00:13:57,931 --> 00:13:59,101
>> TEE TEE: [laughing]
595
00:13:59,103 --> 00:14:00,213
Free champagne.
596
00:14:00,206 --> 00:14:00,996
>> I was just about to order
597
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:02,760
a bottle of that, y'all.
598
00:14:02,758 --> 00:14:03,588
>> TEE TEE: Well done.
599
00:14:03,586 --> 00:14:04,276
>> Yep.
600
00:14:04,275 --> 00:14:05,275
Hey, you know what?
601
00:14:05,275 --> 00:14:06,065
Here you go, brother.
602
00:14:06,068 --> 00:14:09,238
Make a toast to my dawg, my boy.
603
00:14:09,241 --> 00:14:10,341
It's your birthday, man.
604
00:14:10,344 --> 00:14:11,904
Thank you for always havin'
605
00:14:11,896 --> 00:14:13,096
a brother's bizzack, man.
606
00:14:13,103 --> 00:14:14,863
>> Yo, is that Estelle?
607
00:14:14,862 --> 00:14:16,102
>> Estelle? The singer Estelle?
608
00:14:16,103 --> 00:14:17,523
Oh, she can't see me.
609
00:14:17,517 --> 00:14:19,207
>> Uh-uh-uh, I see you, Malik.
610
00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:20,306
Uh-uh, and I'm never leavin'
611
00:14:20,310 --> 00:14:21,620
you concert tickets again, okay?
612
00:14:21,620 --> 00:14:22,480
>> Girl, come--hey!
613
00:14:22,482 --> 00:14:23,312
You ain't get that bouquet of
614
00:14:23,310 --> 00:14:24,100
diamonds I sent you for
615
00:14:24,103 --> 00:14:25,313
an apology, huh?
616
00:14:25,310 --> 00:14:27,900
[laughing]
617
00:14:27,896 --> 00:14:28,656
Damn, she's seen me.
618
00:14:28,655 --> 00:14:29,475
>> So what?
619
00:14:29,482 --> 00:14:30,482
>> What do you mean so?
620
00:14:30,482 --> 00:14:31,452
The second rule in ballers'
621
00:14:31,448 --> 00:14:32,518
etiquette is if a female
622
00:14:32,517 --> 00:14:33,617
celebrity comes into
623
00:14:33,620 --> 00:14:34,690
a restaurant you're already in,
624
00:14:34,689 --> 00:14:35,619
you've gotta send her a bottle
625
00:14:35,620 --> 00:14:36,520
of something.
626
00:14:36,517 --> 00:14:37,447
>> So, can I get a bottle of
627
00:14:37,448 --> 00:14:38,408
Estelle's favorite champagne
628
00:14:38,413 --> 00:14:39,313
sent to--
629
00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:40,720
>> Whoa, whoa, whoa, Tee Tee.
630
00:14:40,724 --> 00:14:41,594
What you doin', dawg?
631
00:14:41,586 --> 00:14:42,546
>> I'm just sending a bottle
632
00:14:42,551 --> 00:14:43,381
to your girl Estelle like
633
00:14:43,379 --> 00:14:44,309
I always do.
634
00:14:44,310 --> 00:14:45,140
>> I mean what you doin', man?
635
00:14:45,137 --> 00:14:46,687
It's your birthday, man.
636
00:14:46,689 --> 00:14:47,619
Get over here, man.
637
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:48,790
We're focusin' on you.
638
00:14:48,793 --> 00:14:49,723
>> Hey, hey, come on.
639
00:14:49,724 --> 00:14:50,694
Hello. Shawn.
640
00:14:50,689 --> 00:14:51,829
>> What the hell are you doin'?
641
00:14:51,827 --> 00:14:52,717
>> Dude, I got you.
642
00:14:52,724 --> 00:14:53,624
Shawn got that M.B.A. and just
643
00:14:53,620 --> 00:14:54,790
won that championship money.
644
00:14:54,793 --> 00:14:55,693
He's gonna have to pay.
645
00:14:55,689 --> 00:14:57,029
Ballers' etiquette, son.
646
00:14:57,034 --> 00:14:58,724
>> Dumb ass, we aren't in
647
00:14:58,724 --> 00:15:00,214
Dallas, we're in San Diego.
648
00:15:00,206 --> 00:15:01,546
It's my town.
649
00:15:01,551 --> 00:15:02,661
I've got baller's home court
650
00:15:02,655 --> 00:15:03,925
disadvantage.
651
00:15:03,931 --> 00:15:04,661
Now they're gonna expect me to
652
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:05,655
pay for all this stuff.
653
00:15:05,655 --> 00:15:06,515
Hey, hey, hey!
654
00:15:06,517 --> 00:15:07,897
>> What's up?
655
00:15:07,896 --> 00:15:08,786
>> How you doin', boss?
656
00:15:08,793 --> 00:15:09,763
>> Hey, Malik.
657
00:15:09,758 --> 00:15:10,718
How you doin', son?
658
00:15:10,724 --> 00:15:12,244
>> I'm good.
659
00:15:12,241 --> 00:15:14,721
>> Malik, who's she look like?
660
00:15:14,724 --> 00:15:16,414
Huh?
661
00:15:16,413 --> 00:15:18,143
>> I don't know, Tee Tee.
662
00:15:18,137 --> 00:15:19,617
>> Thanks for comin' out.
663
00:15:19,620 --> 00:15:22,240
>> Ooh. Derwin.
664
00:15:22,241 --> 00:15:24,001
Oh!
665
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:24,900
Derwin?
666
00:15:24,896 --> 00:15:26,586
>> What happened today?
667
00:15:26,586 --> 00:15:27,376
'Cause now it seems like I've
668
00:15:27,379 --> 00:15:29,719
gotta pay Tasha and Irv.
669
00:15:29,724 --> 00:15:30,694
Melanie, I thought I told you
670
00:15:30,689 --> 00:15:32,899
not to get involved.
671
00:15:32,896 --> 00:15:34,096
>> No, you didn't.
672
00:15:34,103 --> 00:15:36,933
You told me to supervise Irv.
673
00:15:36,931 --> 00:15:38,661
>> Nicholson-Cruise, Mel.
674
00:15:38,655 --> 00:15:40,065
>> The truth, Derwin.
675
00:15:40,068 --> 00:15:41,448
Just say it.
676
00:15:41,448 --> 00:15:42,378
>> I already told you.
677
00:15:42,379 --> 00:15:43,479
>> The truth. Just say it.
678
00:15:43,482 --> 00:15:44,592
>> Okay, you were never
679
00:15:44,586 --> 00:15:46,656
the boss of Irv, all right?
680
00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:47,855
He was just humoring you
681
00:15:47,862 --> 00:15:49,002
for me.
682
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:49,830
Melanie, he was running
683
00:15:49,827 --> 00:15:51,167
everything by me for me.
684
00:15:51,172 --> 00:15:53,692
>> Are you serious?
685
00:15:53,689 --> 00:15:55,029
Derwin, why would you do that?
686
00:15:55,034 --> 00:15:56,244
Why would you lie?
687
00:15:56,241 --> 00:15:58,971
>> Because, Melanie, you can't
688
00:15:58,965 --> 00:16:00,685
handle the truth, and I tried
689
00:16:00,689 --> 00:16:02,099
to tell you.
690
00:16:02,103 --> 00:16:03,623
Listen, you're not the C.E.O.,
691
00:16:03,620 --> 00:16:04,410
okay?
692
00:16:04,413 --> 00:16:05,663
You're not the President.
693
00:16:05,655 --> 00:16:06,825
You're not the Vice-President.
694
00:16:06,827 --> 00:16:07,617
You're not the Manager.
695
00:16:07,620 --> 00:16:08,900
You're just my wife.
696
00:16:08,896 --> 00:16:10,616
Be that, please.
697
00:16:10,620 --> 00:16:13,480
>> Oh, okay. I get it.
698
00:16:13,482 --> 00:16:15,002
You just want me to shut up,
699
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,100
not have any opinions,
700
00:16:16,103 --> 00:16:18,033
and spread my legs for you
701
00:16:18,034 --> 00:16:19,454
whenever you want it.
702
00:16:19,448 --> 00:16:21,068
>> I mean, is that so bad?
703
00:16:21,068 --> 00:16:22,098
Why can't you just sit back
704
00:16:22,103 --> 00:16:23,523
and let me take care of you?
705
00:16:23,517 --> 00:16:24,447
>> Derwin, I didn't sign
706
00:16:24,448 --> 00:16:25,408
up for this.
707
00:16:25,413 --> 00:16:26,243
>> [frustrated sigh]
708
00:16:26,241 --> 00:16:27,311
>> Look, I didn't give up my
709
00:16:27,310 --> 00:16:28,410
relationship with Tasha or my
710
00:16:28,413 --> 00:16:30,453
career to sit on the sidelines.
711
00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:31,548
>> Whoa, I didn't tell you to
712
00:16:31,551 --> 00:16:32,691
give up your career, Melanie.
713
00:16:32,689 --> 00:16:33,999
That was your choice.
714
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:34,790
>> Why do you think I did
715
00:16:34,793 --> 00:16:35,793
it, Derwin?
716
00:16:35,793 --> 00:16:36,593
>> I don't know.
717
00:16:36,586 --> 00:16:37,656
I thought maybe you...
718
00:16:37,655 --> 00:16:38,615
mighta got tired of all
719
00:16:38,620 --> 00:16:39,900
the hours studying and all
720
00:16:39,896 --> 00:16:40,786
that working.
721
00:16:40,793 --> 00:16:41,593
I thought you might want to just
722
00:16:41,586 --> 00:16:42,476
kick back.
723
00:16:42,482 --> 00:16:44,002
>> Kick back? Kick back?
724
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:45,070
Is that what you think
725
00:16:45,068 --> 00:16:46,208
I do for you?
726
00:16:46,206 --> 00:16:47,896
Derwin, I am 50% of this legacy
727
00:16:47,896 --> 00:16:49,096
and you wouldn't be
728
00:16:49,103 --> 00:16:50,453
Derwin "Boom" Davis if it
729
00:16:50,448 --> 00:16:51,408
weren't for me.
730
00:16:51,413 --> 00:16:52,693
>> Hey, hold up.
731
00:16:52,689 --> 00:16:54,409
Hold up, okay?
732
00:16:54,413 --> 00:16:55,483
You may be in the skybox
733
00:16:55,482 --> 00:16:56,552
cheering me on, Melanie,
734
00:16:56,551 --> 00:16:58,481
but these hands right here,
735
00:16:58,482 --> 00:16:59,382
they catch those balls
736
00:16:59,379 --> 00:17:01,169
on Sunday.
737
00:17:01,172 --> 00:17:04,032
Right here.
738
00:17:04,034 --> 00:17:06,314
>> Hm.
739
00:17:06,310 --> 00:17:07,660
Well, thank you for letting me
740
00:17:07,655 --> 00:17:09,855
Well, thank you for letting me
know where I stand.
741
00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:12,212
know where I stand.
742
00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:13,165
>> Hey, let's get a toast
743
00:17:13,172 --> 00:17:13,932
over here.
744
00:17:13,931 --> 00:17:15,241
A toast!
745
00:17:15,241 --> 00:17:16,591
>> TEE TEE: A drink to my best
746
00:17:16,586 --> 00:17:18,166
friend Malik.
747
00:17:18,172 --> 00:17:20,832
>> ALL: [cheering]
748
00:17:20,827 --> 00:17:22,027
>> To Malik!
749
00:17:22,034 --> 00:17:25,004
>> To Malik!
>> [club music]
750
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:34,240
>> [club music]
751
00:17:34,241 --> 00:17:36,621
>> [club music]
>> Honey, I'm sorry.
752
00:17:36,620 --> 00:17:41,100
>> Honey, I'm sorry.
753
00:17:41,103 --> 00:17:42,723
Oh, come on, Melanie.
754
00:17:42,724 --> 00:17:45,794
I said I was sorry.
755
00:17:45,793 --> 00:17:47,283
>> I'm sorry.
756
00:17:47,275 --> 00:17:49,995
Is this what you want?
757
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,690
Or is this better?
758
00:17:53,689 --> 00:17:54,589
>> No, Melanie, that's not
759
00:17:54,586 --> 00:17:55,686
better and that's not what
760
00:17:55,689 --> 00:17:57,239
better and that's not what
I want.
761
00:17:57,241 --> 00:18:00,591
I want.
762
00:18:00,586 --> 00:18:01,826
Okay, truth is, I don't know if
763
00:18:01,827 --> 00:18:03,277
I'd be here without you.
764
00:18:03,275 --> 00:18:04,275
But I know I don't wanna be
765
00:18:04,275 --> 00:18:06,785
here without you.
766
00:18:06,793 --> 00:18:07,763
Melanie, honey, the thing
767
00:18:07,758 --> 00:18:09,378
is I love you past the moon.
768
00:18:09,379 --> 00:18:10,309
And I know sometimes I do some
769
00:18:10,310 --> 00:18:15,480
stupid stuff, but I love you,
770
00:18:15,482 --> 00:18:17,592
and I mean it.
771
00:18:17,586 --> 00:18:19,826
and I mean it.
Now you let me cuddle you.
772
00:18:19,827 --> 00:18:30,067
Now you let me cuddle you.
773
00:18:30,068 --> 00:18:30,928
>> ♪ 'Cause I just wanna
774
00:18:30,931 --> 00:18:31,831
♪ Love you, baby
775
00:18:31,827 --> 00:18:32,787
>> It's all right.
776
00:18:32,793 --> 00:18:33,663
>> ♪ I don't wanna
777
00:18:33,655 --> 00:18:34,995
♪ Waste no time
778
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:35,900
♪ Wanna be
779
00:18:35,896 --> 00:18:36,896
♪ Your only one, baby
780
00:18:36,896 --> 00:18:39,786
♪ Please don't break my heart
781
00:18:39,793 --> 00:18:41,213
♪ Tailor-made black linen
782
00:18:41,206 --> 00:18:42,966
♪ Tinted Escalade
783
00:18:42,965 --> 00:18:44,305
♪ With a made man in it
784
00:18:44,310 --> 00:18:45,410
♪ Rose gold shades
785
00:18:45,413 --> 00:18:46,593
♪ With the rozay lenses
786
00:18:46,586 --> 00:18:47,686
♪ Pink champagne
787
00:18:47,689 --> 00:18:49,479
♪ And the flow's so endless
788
00:18:49,482 --> 00:18:51,142
>> Do you have to be every
789
00:18:51,137 --> 00:18:52,757
stereotype, Malik?
790
00:18:52,758 --> 00:18:53,688
>> ♪ Ain't no secrets
791
00:18:53,689 --> 00:18:54,859
♪ I'ma eat that for breakfast
792
00:18:54,862 --> 00:18:55,902
♪ Keep her close to me
793
00:18:55,896 --> 00:18:56,756
♪ Like lyrics
794
00:18:56,758 --> 00:18:57,718
♪ She spoke to me
795
00:18:57,724 --> 00:18:58,594
♪ In the middle of the winter
796
00:18:58,586 --> 00:18:59,656
♪ So I'ma let her close to me
797
00:18:59,655 --> 00:19:02,405
♪ All these stars out
798
00:19:02,413 --> 00:19:03,763
♪ And these people
799
00:19:03,758 --> 00:19:05,068
♪ Know my name
800
00:19:05,068 --> 00:19:06,618
♪ Know my name
♪ I can be so pretentious
801
00:19:06,620 --> 00:19:16,620
♪ I can be so pretentious
802
00:19:16,620 --> 00:19:31,590
♪ I can be so pretentious
>> ♪
803
00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:36,190
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