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Zulu
This programme contains violence, very strong language,
and scenes that some viewers may find distressing.
QUANE: All the children must suffer,
and all must play their part.
Perish or transcend.
Why me?
AULUS: Wait, stop, stop.
Are you pissing in my bath?
Nobody
pisses
in my bath.
♪ BAKER GURVITZ ARMY: HEARTS ON FIRE ♪
VERAN: May the gods speak!
The demon of Rome is here. (CROWD CHEERING)
♪ Miles of blaze In the evening sun... ♪
There'll come a day when I will call upon you.
You must be ready.
ANDRA: There remains one hope.
A maiden,
who, if she pleases the gods,
may save us.
Actually...
You will actually become a fish.
You mean the same way I actually
became a bird?
(SPLATS) Oh, shit.
♪ ..The battle has just begun ♪
AULUS: True battle
does not always unfold upon the field.
Sometimes, it's the one man you need to fear.
Brother...
You want the Druid, I want the maiden.
MAN: I will find her.
(SCREAMS)
(YELLS)
The prophecy, the whole story is about to come crashing down.
HARKA: Hello, little brother.
(SWORD SQUELCHING)
(GASPS)
This guy was going to kill you, right?
(DISTANT INDISTINCT CHATTER)
(CHILD LAUGHS)
AULUS: Oh, oh...
(AULUS LAUGHS)
Woah, watch your flank.
You watch your flank.
Come on, you call yourself a soldier.
(AULUS IMITATES SCREAM)
I am vanquished. (GRUNTS)
BOTH: LAUGH
When is the ceremony?
When I get back from Egypt.
Do you get new armour?
Yeah, and a helmet. And a bust in the Senate.
Will I be a general one day?
Well, that depends.
On what?
On whether you'll make it as a soldier.
I mean, can you march all day, can you sleep in a ditch,
live off spiders... Spiders?
And frogs. (LAUGHS)
General Aulus...
Mighty emperor.
When you travel to conquer distant lands,
I command you to take your son with you.
Come here. Come.
(KISSES)
Do you still miss her?
I want to show you something.
You see that star?
The tiny one, far away from all the others?
The yellow one?
Exactly.
That was your mother's favourite.
She called it her little light.
And she'd sing to it at night.
So, whenever it gets dark and you're lonely,
you look up into the sky,
and you find that star and you sing.
And she'll be listening.
Will you ever marry again?
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING) (DOGS BARKING)
You need to come with me.
Where are we going?
It's not far.
What is this place?
WHISPERS: A tunnel.
Which God does it honour?
The only God.
Dad?
I'm scared.
We'll meet again.
You go now.
(AIR BLOWING)
(KNIFE SQUELCHING)
- ♪ T. - REX: CHILDREN OF THE REVOLUTION ♪
♪ Yeah!
♪ Well, you can bump and grind
♪ It is good for your mind
♪ Well, you can twist and shout
♪ Let it all hang out
♪ But you won't fool the children of the revolution
♪ No, you won't fool the children of the revolution
♪ No way!
♪ Hey!
♪ Woah! ♪
People of Verulamium, on behalf of the emperor,
Aulus Plautius is this day honoured
for the capture and quelling, this past winter,
of the fortress of Isca.
(CROWD INDISTINCT IN BACKGROUND)
Hail the gods!
ALL: Hail the gods!
Hail the gods!
You know, I've been about, north, south, east, west,
never in all my time have I met a bigger bunch
of devious, lying, untrustworthy, ungovernable...
And don't get me started on those two twice-in-line,
pious, pompous, skinny-arsed brothers!
Don't know which one I'd sooner throttle.
And now, just when I get an inch with one of them,
he fuckin' dies!
And you know who this makes look like a prize twat, don't ya?
Me!
Why is the girl so important to you?
What did she do? It's not what she's done.
It's what she's going to do.
I don't understand.
(SIGHS)
Forgive me.
I know what Isca cost you personally.
I only did what I wanted to.
Your bidding.
Come here.
What's the matter?
What's that?
Aulus, what is it?
♪ DAVID GILMOUR: MURDER ♪
Hello, old friend.
♪ Some of them standing Some are waiting in line
♪ As if there was something that they thought they might find
♪ Taking some strength from the feelings that always were shared
♪ And in the background The eyes that just stared
♪ What was it brought you out here in the dark?
(GRUNTING)
♪ Was it your only way Of making your mark?
♪ Did you get rid of all the voices in your head?
♪ Do you now miss them and the things that they said? ♪
(DRUMMING AND CHANTING)
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!
Not now, love. Daddy's having runes carved into his head.
WOMAN: Behold! ALL: CHEERING.
Oh, thank you.
I look forward to one day finding out
what they may possibly mean.
Phelan is no more.
From this day forward, you shall be known by your novice name.
From now on, you are...
Quant.
Quant?
Quant.
Excellent.
(CROWD CHEERING)
If you ask me, and you didn't,
that's a mistake.
There's no way he's Druid material.
Then you won't like what I'm about to say.
Oh, no.
School him in the ways of the Earth.
No, no, no... The wind, the fire. Show patience,
forbearance, force when necessary... Sweet gods, no.
As you in turn were shown by me many, many moons ago.
I'm Veran's Arrow, the Guardian,
mentor to the Chosen One.
Really?
And how did that go?
It's Veran's will.
Do the Veran's will, Veran's Arrow.
Not a moment to lose.
Qua...
(SIGHS)
(SCOFFS)
Morning, princess.
That's close enough.
How's the child? Make it through the winter?
It's tough out there in the cold, especially for royalty.
What do you want?
Rome will meet with the Veran, alone.
Tell Rome to go fuck himself.
(LAUGHS)
Ah, princess.
It's priceless.
One minute she's sat on her arse in a castle,
two winters on, she knows the mind of the Veran.
Why should I trust you when Veran doesn't?
Because unlike you, I actually know him.
Think I'm stupid, witch?
Easy, princess.
You call me that once more.
Where's the meeting?
The first full moon,
less than two days' time.
Well, I can hardly wait.
ANIA: The witch spoke of the Chosen One.
What did she say?
Rome would stop at nothing to get her.
But, if we give her up, there would be peace.
There is no peace but through her.
And Rome knows that.
That's why he wants her so badly.
How did Rome know of her?
Druids are not the only ones with the prophecy.
And what if it's a trap?
Who says it isn't? Hya!
(GUARDS STOMP)
I'll be back in three days.
Aye, General.
Make sure no one comes in and out of the villa while I'm gone.
You can manage that, can't you? Of course.
No, I'm serious. I want you to keep an eye out. Come, let's go.
Hya. Hya.
Hya.
(HORSE NEIGHS)
That's amazing.
Ten thousand years old and you never look a day older.
Oh, is that new?
The, uh, scar?
Now, don't get me wrong, I like it, you know. Adds something.
Makes you look rugged.
Well...
I don't wanna keep you, so I'll get right down to it.
It seems to me I've got you over a barrel.
And not just over a barrel,
but, tied to it, frock up, pants down.
And I don't have to tell you, a man of the world,
what happens next.
Fourteen moons ago, I came to bargain.
And you told me the gods don't deal.
And I thought to myself, you know what,
I'm gonna have to teach that skinny cunt a lesson.
So, with your Cantii queen, your witch
and your mysterious if slightly irritating brother,
I walked into your gods' house and I blew it to kingdom come.
And the best part is,
I didn't even have to get out of bed to do it.
Listen, Hallam.
Oh, do you mind if I call you Hallam?
(CHUCKLING) From the western hills.
Son of a shepherd.
You know, when I found out you weren't 10,000 years old,
you could have knocked me over with a feather.
Just plain Hallam.
Last in a long line of poor fools
who call themselves the Veran.
We both know why you're here, Rome.
Forty moons and you still haven't found her.
How is that playing with your master?
How patient is he, Rome?
I've come to make you an offer.
What offer?
Your time is over.
I mean, you know it, I know it, your gods know it.
We know which way the wind is blowing.
It doesn't have to be like that.
I can make it stop.
What's the offer, Rome?
A sanctuary.
All the lands from the black mountains to the southern plains.
And Isca with it.
Your lake of tears, all returned.
Place where you and you guards can thrive and prosper.
Unbothered by us.
Just like the old days.
In exchange for what?
The girl.
(SCOFFS)
Now, I know what you're thinking.
What with your prophecy and all, but things change.
I know you can go back
and square this with the Druids and the tribes.
Come on.
I mean, we've helped each other out before.
When you chopped up that king for me, huh?
What's his name?
You would not be here if you were not afraid.
The Chosen One was weak once,
but with every moon, she gets stronger.
And your master grows more and more restless.
More angered by your failure.
Do not presume to know my master's mind.
Oh, I know your master better than you think.
Have you never asked yourself why I let you in to the Underworld?
It's because you don't enter the Underworld.
The Underworld enters you.
You know I never thought I'd say this, but I miss your brother.
(DOVES COO)
You think you understand this game, Rome?
Think again!
(BONES CLACKING)
Morning. Morning.
Sorry, I don't know your name.
Quant. (SCOFFING)
Quant? I think that's how you say it.
(SCOFFS) Alright.
Well, I'm, uh... I'm here to, uh...
I was chosen by Veran to mentor the Chosen One
and I'm going to be teaching you some stuff.
So, you're my mentor?
No, no, no. Not your mentor. More of a...
A what?
You know...
I genuinely don't.
Sorry, I'm not being clever, I just don't have the first
idea about being a Druid. Let's jump in, shall we?
I mean, I know they killed both my parents.
And stopped me being king.
And were key players in my sister's murder,
but, apart from that, they're a complete mystery.
So, let's get started.
See this?
This is frog moss. Yeah.
This...
Paper weed. WHISPERS: Paper weed.
That patch over there... thistle spear.
Uh-huh.
I want you to put this on,
and go off and fill it with these.
This moss, this weed, and that blue herb.
OK, thistle spears.
Yeah, got it!
Aw, it smells nice.
(SNIFFS)
It's poisonous.
Swallow that, you'll shit both lungs.
(GULPS WATER, SPITS)
So (PHELAN SPITTING, GROANING)
Frog moss, paper weed
thistle spear. Yeah.
See you later.
Under this oak, yeah?
Beech?
Sycamore? Never.
Not once did I imagine the price of failure will be this high.
(HORSES GALLOPING)
Where's the General?
Gone for a walk.
Where?
Didn't say.
You don't like him, do you?
No soldier likes his general.
But you despise him.
He killed your sister.
Destroyed your home.
Winter turns to spring, you're still here.
And you have a theory about that.
Do.
Either you're made of stone, or you're planning something.
Come on, take your pick. I don't have to.
But whatever it is, he already knows about it.
What about you?
The Romans destroyed your home.
Murdered your friends and family.
And yet here you are...
(PEN THUDS)
We're in the same boat, you and I.
You have no idea what you're talking about.
I saw you
let that man in here the other day.
I saw him leave with the General's sword.
And what are you gonna do about it?
Perhaps we can help each other.
(HORSES NICKERING)
(DOGS BARKING)
(DOOR CLOSES)
What's your plan?
I'm gonna kill the General.
And you're gonna help me. His master is strong.
If you mean Lokka, I'm not afraid of him.
Many gods, one god, what's the difference?
You walk a dangerous path.
These marks on your face,
which god did they honour?
Do you even remember his name?
I've seen so much blood.
All caused by phantoms.
You want to be free, Vitus, really free?
Then help me.
How?
What's the name of your god?
The one who protects you, the one who knew you as a child?
I do not know him.
Your new god can't protect you now, you know that.
What's his name?
Her name is Sekhmet. And what's your name?
VITUS: (ECHOING) My name is (INDISTINCT).
(AIR WHOOSHING)
(INCENSE BURNER CLATTERING, CHANTS ECHOING)
(SHELLS CLATTERING)
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
(RUSTLING)
(MAN YELLS)
(DOGS BARKING)
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING CONTINUES)
(HORSE NEIGHS)
Oh, no.
(HORSES NICKER)
(LEAVES RUSTLING)
Thistle spear.
Frog moss.
Hello. Hello, hello, hello.
(SIGHS)
(SOFTLY) Boy, look at that.
Look at that, look at that.
(EXHALES) Oh. Hello.
Here's one.
What if the Romans win, hmm?
What if they wipe us out and there's no one left to worship our gods?
What do they do then? They can't die. They're gods.
So, do they just sit around,
watching the Roman gods get on with it?
What happens when, one day, the Roman gods die or get pushed aside,
and there's a whole bunch of new gods?
Which begs the question,
were there gods before our gods,
who our gods pushed aside?
Here's my point. I'm worried that, somewhere,
there are all these old gods,
just sitting around,
doing absolutely nothing.
You don't worship anything.
But you're here.
Just like I am.
(SIGHS) What's gonna happen?
(DOOR RATTLES)
When did they get here? This morning.
(GIGGLING)
HEMPLE: Let's drink.
(CHUCKLE ECHOING)
Eat.
(LAUGHS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTERING AND GIGGLING)
So, how was your journey?
What's that?
That? Oh, it commemorates a recent victory.
Victory? Yes.
The capture of a crucial stronghold in the west.
BLAINE: A crucial stronghold in the west.
Blaine.
It's been a while.
I have indeed been here quite a while.
But don't worry. We've not forgotten you.
Well, help yourself to wine. Hmm.
What happened to the finger? Oh, erm...
I shut it in a door.
(WINCES)
(SNIFFING) (OWL HOOTS)
I want to be alone.
With my husband.
Come along. Let's leave these two to catch up.
(FOOTSTEPS RECEDING)
You look well. You look fat.
The spoilt boy who spent the summer drinking buttermilk.
Yes, well, I've missed you too.
Lokka is angry.
You were sent to do his will... (GASPS)
And you failed.
Well, first of all, my darling, who says I've failed?
Then where is she?
It's not that simple.
You were sent here for one reason.
Now everything we have worked for,
everything we've achieved is about to be destroyed.
Do you know what he'll do to you? To us?
So, is that why you're here? To give me a telling off?
It's not my wrath you should fear.
I came here to do his will and I'm doing it.
These Druids are not like the others we've faced.
And their powers run deep. Their gods are old.
They're in the soil, the rivers, the blood.
So? So, it takes time.
We don't have time.
Perhaps Lokka still loves you.
But for how long?
You let me worry about that.
(BOTTLE THUDS)
Don't forget who it was
chose you to serve him.
How could I?
(LAUGHING)
What are you doing?
Hey. Having supper.
Where are they? Where's what?
The frog moss. The paper weed!
The thistle spear!
I couldn't find any. What do you mean?
The whole forest is stiff with the fuckers!
Yeah, but I couldn't find any.
Found something else, though, look.
Two days ago, I met with the Druid.
Now, he's a stubborn one,
but I know he's about to cooperate.
Oh. Why is that?
I've hit him where it hurts.
Ooh. Place called Isca.
It's their most sacred spot and I've captured it.
You said yourself, their gods are in the soil, the rivers,
so, how can capturing one stronghold hurt them?
Well, like most things, dear, you're missing the fine detail.
Fuck the fine detail. Lokka wants results.
I chose you because you're fast,
strong.
Are you still strong,
or just a fat puppy?
Well, you try me.
(SNIFFS)
(CONTINUES SNIFFING)
Well, well,
what have we here?
(THUNDER RUMBLES, WATER TRICKLES)
BLAINE: What's your name?
I'm Praefectus Vitus Validus.
I had a dream about a man like you.
(THUNDER RUMBLES IN DISTANCE)
He turned into a snake.
Do not touch me again.
She's a queen of lands west of here,
and she's been a valuable asset.
She knows magic. Oh, she thinks she does.
Is she a good fuck? (CHUCKLES)
You know, my love, if I didn't know you better,
I'd say you were a tad jealous.
I've seen you fuck a dog, Aulis.
What is
this?
Oh, that, it's, erm...
It's a sword. One of the children were playing with it outside.
Ooh. (CHUCKLES)
Doesn't look like a sword.
What else could it possibly be?
By the way, where is your bumcha?
The Praefectus?
Lucius? He's gone.
Gone? Yes.
He was injured in the landing so we shipped him home.
And miss all the fun?
Where's your sword?
It's, erm.
(BANGING) out.
Getting polished.
(SCRAPING) Polished?
Yes. And engraved. (CHUCKLES)
(SNAPPING)
(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
We found this
stuck in a stump.
Recognize it? It's a sword.
Has your name on it.
Oh, yes, and they've spelt it right. That's nice, isn't it?
It's lovely and shiny. You can see your face in it.
Send for her.
(WOLF HOWLING)
(AIR WHOOSHING)
It's been some time since I looked into these eyes.
These eyes look older.
The things they've seen have changed them.
Just as the things ahead will change them further.
When I look into your eyes, I can see everything.
Your fear.
Your terror.
Your weakness.
I also see some wisdom.
But you're not yet wise.
There's much still to learn.
Your name's Hallum.
You were born in the Western Hills.
You were taken from your home by the Druids.
You were too young to know what was going on.
Before you knew it, you'd forgotten who Hallum was
and you were lost.
And they shaped you.
Trained and forced you to turn into something else,
something that you never were.
They told you it was meant to be.
And you felt like you didn't have a choice.
It was written.
But you knew you were lost.
And you knew you would stay lost until you found a way out.
'Cause you didn't choose this.
You didn't choose any of this.
(CRACKLING)
Ah, Hemple.
This is Queen Amena of the Cantii.
Queen Amena, this is Hemple...
My wife.
I'm honoured to meet you.
So, tell me.
How do you like my husband's cock?
Oh, don't worry, my dear.
When a soldier is far from home,
for years, in this case,
he is won't to take a whore to end his lusting.
To release tension.
Keeps him focused.
Makes a change from wanking into a sock.
Isn't that right, darling?
My husband says he trusts you.
Is he right to?
Before you answer, you must know that
my reason for being here
is not to catch up with old hubby here. No, no, no, no, no.
I'm here on very, very important business.
So, what we need to know,
when it really comes down to it,
is who is a friend
and who is a snake?
(SNIFFS)
"I've seen so much blood.
"All caused by phantoms."
"You want be free, Vitus, really free?"
"Then help me."
(GIGGLES)
Tonight, my fellow travellers and I will hold a feast.
To celebrate this wonderous reunion with our fated General.
Come. (GIGGLES)
You say you came here to find the truth.
I think there's another reason.
Tell me, child, why did you really come here?
These past months, I've seen things,
done things I never thought I would.
Many times I've been lost.
Afraid.
But the thing I was most afraid of, it wasn't fire,
or water, or even death.
It was love.
When I found it, that's when I truly changed.
Because, for the first time, I felt like me.
Before the sun set, it was gone.
And I miss it.
I miss being me. I just
want to be me.
So, that's her, eh?
That's her.
She didn't look that pleased to see you.
What's your point? Hey, look,
I know that she's been through a lot.
A significant amount of it is your fault.
Yeah.
When I killed that boy, I was absolutely convinced
that I was doing the right thing.
And then I discovered I was wrong.
But, and here is the part... I thought she was annoying
if I hadn't... ..she wouldn't be here now.
Exactly. Exactly. She'd be lost.
But she came back. Congratulations.
Hey. Don't thank me.
Man who did that was called Phelan. Good.
Or Rolf. Listen...
Quant, if it's all the same with you,
I'll get through this next bit
without your profound insights.
I mean, I've got this.
I know what's going on.
Suit yourself.
(SPLASHING)
Evening, Abdul.
(VITUS GRUNTING)
Oh! (CLATTERING)
(GRUNTS)
(COUGHS)
(INHALES SHARPLY)
Have you never wanted to escape?
Escape to where?
What is my name?
It's written... here.
Tell me my name or I cannot go on.
You're not ready to know.
Tell me...
If I'm to trust you.
Aulus Plautius.
ALL: Aulus Plautius.
Marriage
is a long, hard journey.
And sometimes, we lose the path.
Weakness beckons.
Veils are drawn.
And, so, this day, we will renew the vows we made.
And the sacrament we shared that day.
As we shed ourselves of the veils,
the fears,
the weaknesses.
Your name...
Let us feast.
(FIRE SIZZLES)
Your name is...
Fuck the gods. (GRUNTS)
(GROANS AND CHOKES)
My name is Cait.
(PANTING)
Shall I be Mother?
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