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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:57,740 Oh, it's going to be one of them days, is it? What do you want? 2 00:00:57,740 --> 00:01:02,440 Happy Birthday! It's not me birthday. It could be. 3 00:01:05,740 --> 00:01:09,400 Don't go away. I've got a proposition. 4 00:01:12,140 --> 00:01:15,360 I don't want your propositions. 5 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:20,360 Just listen! That's all I'm asking. Take the flowers. I don't want them. 6 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:24,820 I can't accept gifts from strange men. Take one flower... 7 00:01:24,820 --> 00:01:29,600 and I'll bring the rest tomorrow night when it's quiet and cosy. Oh! 8 00:01:30,420 --> 00:01:33,260 Come on, my little Tweety Pie! 9 00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:35,960 Tha knows I'm not the marrying kind 10 00:01:35,960 --> 00:01:40,560 but I might consider something with visiting privileges. 11 00:01:55,100 --> 00:02:00,160 You don't miss the army, do you? I don't suppose it misses me. 12 00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:05,200 Then, you were only in for the war. It seemed long enough at the time. 13 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:09,420 I don't know how I managed to tear myself away(!) 14 00:02:09,420 --> 00:02:12,480 I stayed on as a regular but... 15 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:16,440 it was never the same after the war finished. 16 00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:20,940 No, you miss the excitement and the challenge. 17 00:02:20,940 --> 00:02:25,600 It's the little things you miss - the comradeship and... 18 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:29,820 and brewing tea up in your little slit trench. 19 00:02:29,820 --> 00:02:32,880 The cough of a dying sentry. 20 00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:57,900 I suppose the time has come for me to face it. 21 00:02:57,900 --> 00:03:01,100 You're going to get new trousers? 22 00:03:01,100 --> 00:03:04,500 I'm not going to get new trousers. 23 00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:07,280 I hardly call that facing it. 24 00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:10,640 That's the trouble with your trousers. 25 00:03:10,640 --> 00:03:15,760 Any minute you expect to be facing it! It's more serious than trousers. 26 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:19,280 There's not much more serious than your trousers. 27 00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,880 It's Nora Batty. 28 00:03:23,020 --> 00:03:25,760 Yes, well, that IS serious. 29 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:29,060 I'm getting nowhere with Nora Batty. 30 00:03:29,060 --> 00:03:32,480 Well, that must be a relief. 31 00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:36,440 I've half a mind to try and forget her...completely. 32 00:03:37,440 --> 00:03:41,160 You mean like her husband used to do? 33 00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:44,880 Well, she's not the only attractive bird. 34 00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:50,280 Trouble is, she's the only one living next door. 35 00:03:51,300 --> 00:03:54,720 It must be terrible when the mind goes. 36 00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:57,320 Well, I expect he's used to it. 37 00:03:58,540 --> 00:04:03,680 I've a good mind to go back to my first love. What? Social security? 38 00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:07,440 Audrey Mottershaw! 39 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:12,260 But that was at school! So? Well, have you seen her since school? 40 00:04:12,260 --> 00:04:17,040 Well, tha knows how things are! Tha drifts apart. 41 00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:20,720 That's some drift. 42 00:04:27,840 --> 00:04:30,900 You've kept it all this time. 43 00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:36,380 You're just an old sweetie, aren't you? I am, Norm. 44 00:04:36,380 --> 00:04:41,940 Are we talking about BIG Audrey Mottershaw? GBH in a gymslip. 45 00:04:41,940 --> 00:04:44,540 We had this big thing going. 46 00:04:44,540 --> 00:04:49,360 Yes, she used to beat you up. Couldn't keep her hands off me. 47 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:51,720 She were lovely. 48 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:54,100 She was horrible. 49 00:04:54,100 --> 00:04:58,620 Aye, well, all right, but I mean she were nearly lovely. 50 00:04:58,620 --> 00:05:01,380 Well, which one's her? 51 00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:09,080 That one. 52 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:14,060 That's Billy Cinders. 53 00:05:14,060 --> 00:05:15,800 Never! 54 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:22,160 Just imagine! All these years you've been in love with Billy Cinders! 55 00:05:27,880 --> 00:05:35,500 How do you propose to find her? I mean, you don't know where she lives or what she looks like. 56 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:40,640 I know what she looks like. Oh, no, you know what she used to look like. 57 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:45,740 I'd recognise her anywhere. She'll be kneeling on somebody's chest. 58 00:05:45,740 --> 00:05:50,080 Yes, she was very mature, even at school, wasn't she? 59 00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,800 Didn't her voice break before ours? 60 00:05:54,700 --> 00:05:59,180 Serve thee right if I end up with Audrey Mottershaw! 61 00:05:59,180 --> 00:06:01,940 Or even Billy Cinders! 62 00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:10,900 Mottershaw? Audrey Mottershaw? 63 00:06:10,900 --> 00:06:13,560 She were in tha class at school. 64 00:06:13,560 --> 00:06:17,760 Did she always have a mucky neck? No, that was him. 65 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:20,400 A girl with a mucky neck! 66 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:23,480 No, that was Ruby Milburn. 67 00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:27,920 How do you remember Ruby Milburn so well? 68 00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:31,980 She had a crush on me. 69 00:06:31,980 --> 00:06:36,000 It's true! She used to walk him home. Didn't she? 70 00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:39,300 Only as far as Arnold Street. 71 00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:45,440 Lord, the things you miss when you're a milk monitor. 72 00:06:46,820 --> 00:06:48,920 Norman Clegg! 73 00:06:48,920 --> 00:06:51,480 The way she fancied thee... 74 00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:55,900 and tha never went any further with her than Arnold Street. 75 00:06:55,900 --> 00:06:59,580 Never mind me. What about Audrey Mottershaw? 76 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:05,020 Ooh! Yeah, that's her. 77 00:07:05,020 --> 00:07:09,060 Ooh, I remember now! Big Audrey...Mottershaw! 78 00:07:09,060 --> 00:07:13,100 Where do they live? I know where they used to live. 79 00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:15,620 But they pulled it down. Oh. 80 00:07:15,620 --> 00:07:19,040 Well, that's her! That's Audrey Mottershaw! 81 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,760 SHE probably pulled it down! 82 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:31,760 Fancy pulling her house down. How do I find out where she lives now? 83 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:36,280 You probably won't. It's too long ago. I'm going to try. 84 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:39,120 You're a little demon, aren't you? 85 00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:44,300 She may not even live round here any more. I'm going to find her. 86 00:07:44,300 --> 00:07:48,140 You are! You're just an old romantic. 87 00:07:48,140 --> 00:07:51,580 I'm getting nowhere with Nora Batty, Norm. 88 00:07:51,580 --> 00:07:56,420 And I've got to do summat about my love life before I'm past me peak. 89 00:07:56,420 --> 00:08:00,580 Judging by those trousers, you've a peak or two left. 90 00:08:00,580 --> 00:08:06,140 Couldn't you advertise in Wrestlers Weekly or Rugby News? 91 00:08:08,700 --> 00:08:13,100 Even if you find her, she may not remember you. Rubbish! 92 00:08:13,100 --> 00:08:17,520 Ah, well, if she thinks of rubbish she might remember you. 93 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:20,440 I'm going to find her, Norman. 94 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,420 I'm going to find Audrey Mottershaw. 95 00:08:24,700 --> 00:08:28,360 A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. 96 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:33,720 She's probably not even called Mottershaw any more. 97 00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:36,220 Not a Mottershaw? 98 00:08:36,220 --> 00:08:41,060 Of course not. She'll have changed her name if she got married. Listen. 99 00:08:41,060 --> 00:08:45,860 If she knelt on his chest, her husband could be called Mottershaw. 100 00:08:45,860 --> 00:08:50,240 No, no. She'll have a different name entirely. 101 00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:56,820 Like what? How should I know? I'm just trying to tell you, it won't be easy. 102 00:08:56,820 --> 00:09:00,220 Somebody must know if she got married. 103 00:09:00,220 --> 00:09:06,700 Yes, well, who do we know that takes a keen interest in who marries who, 104 00:09:06,700 --> 00:09:11,800 who nearly married who or might've married who, except they got lucky? 105 00:09:12,860 --> 00:09:15,360 Nora Batty. 106 00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:22,640 The Yorkshire Encyclopaedia Of Wedlock, Courtship And Whispers And Rumours. 107 00:09:22,640 --> 00:09:25,020 Just a minute! 108 00:09:25,020 --> 00:09:29,460 I can't ask Nora Batty to help me find another woman. 109 00:09:29,460 --> 00:09:33,920 On second thoughts, though - that'd serve her right. 110 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:39,460 She might be delighted. Hmm, she might even smile. Give over! 111 00:09:39,460 --> 00:09:44,840 I'm breaking her heart. Comes a time when a man has to be rock hard. 112 00:09:50,462 --> 00:09:54,322 Are you sure you want to disturb Nora Batty? 113 00:09:54,322 --> 00:09:59,742 Wouldn't it be wiser to drop her a postcard? I've got a good reason! 114 00:09:59,742 --> 00:10:04,762 Hmm. And I've got a good reason for staying well out of your way. 115 00:10:04,762 --> 00:10:07,162 She can't bite thee. 116 00:10:07,162 --> 00:10:10,602 Ah! Ruby Milburn did. 117 00:10:12,582 --> 00:10:15,482 When? Where did she bite thee? 118 00:10:15,482 --> 00:10:18,342 Behind the bicycle shed. 119 00:10:18,342 --> 00:10:23,022 She claimed she had healing teeth. She could cure warts. 120 00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:26,442 A sort of pioneer of acupuncture? 121 00:10:26,442 --> 00:10:29,442 Entirely self-taught. 122 00:10:29,442 --> 00:10:31,942 He's lying. 123 00:10:31,942 --> 00:10:35,042 Go and ring Nora's bell. 124 00:10:41,762 --> 00:10:44,262 I don't know what the fuss is about. 125 00:10:44,262 --> 00:10:46,582 Now, get away! 126 00:10:46,582 --> 00:10:49,262 That's what all the fuss is about. 127 00:10:49,262 --> 00:10:54,542 It's a deadly brush. Powerful as the bite of Ruby Milburn. 128 00:10:54,542 --> 00:11:01,882 She always does that the first time, but the second time she knows tha's serious and tha's not messing about. 129 00:11:04,002 --> 00:11:06,462 Keep away! 130 00:11:06,462 --> 00:11:11,922 The THIRD time she knows tha's serious and tha's not messing about. 131 00:11:17,242 --> 00:11:19,642 Well, what do you want? 132 00:11:22,922 --> 00:11:25,622 Well? Speak up! 133 00:11:25,622 --> 00:11:29,002 Listen! Who married Audrey Mottershaw? 134 00:11:29,002 --> 00:11:32,082 Mottershaw? Mottershaw? 135 00:11:32,082 --> 00:11:36,002 She was in your class. Did she have a mucky neck? 136 00:11:36,002 --> 00:11:38,402 No, that was Ruby Milburn. 137 00:11:41,002 --> 00:11:43,242 That's the one! 138 00:11:43,242 --> 00:11:48,102 She was related to 'im who came by with firewood. They were cousins. 139 00:11:48,102 --> 00:11:54,762 He 'ad family in 'Uddersfield. He kept chickens. He had a lad with impetigo. 140 00:11:54,762 --> 00:11:59,802 He used to paint 'im purple and he turned out brightest of the lot! 141 00:11:59,802 --> 00:12:03,402 Now...who married Audrey Mottershaw? 142 00:12:05,022 --> 00:12:08,522 It was a Duffield from Headley Terrace! 143 00:12:08,522 --> 00:12:11,222 Tha's a good lass, Nora! 144 00:12:11,222 --> 00:12:15,702 Where's Headley Terrace? Oh, they pulled it down. 145 00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:22,642 There she goes again! Everywhere Audrey Mottershaw goes, she pulls it down. 146 00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:28,782 At least she didn't have a mucky neck. Fancy being bitten by a mucky neck. 147 00:12:28,782 --> 00:12:31,562 She swore it wasn't contagious. 148 00:12:42,082 --> 00:12:43,862 Congratulations! 149 00:12:43,862 --> 00:12:47,222 Congratulations! You with the dog! 150 00:12:47,222 --> 00:12:51,222 Excuse me? Congratulations. You're a winner. 151 00:12:51,222 --> 00:12:53,542 A winner? 152 00:12:53,542 --> 00:12:56,582 Yes. Come inside. Get your gift. 153 00:12:56,582 --> 00:13:00,022 Why me? You're the hundredth person. 154 00:13:00,022 --> 00:13:03,462 Every hundredth person who passes by wins a gift. 155 00:13:03,462 --> 00:13:08,302 How can you afford that? Oh, everybody asks that. 156 00:13:08,302 --> 00:13:13,382 Let's say it gives me pleasure and it's worth it for the advertising. 157 00:13:13,382 --> 00:13:17,442 There's no advertising like word of mouth. 158 00:13:17,442 --> 00:13:20,782 What size gift? Come inside - have a look. 159 00:13:20,782 --> 00:13:24,242 What about the dog? Oh, bring the dog! 160 00:13:26,082 --> 00:13:30,042 We're an equal opportunities establishment. 161 00:13:35,662 --> 00:13:39,482 There's eight Duffields. Write 'em down. 162 00:13:39,482 --> 00:13:42,102 What do you think I'm doing? 163 00:13:42,102 --> 00:13:45,582 Eight Duffields. She must be one of them. 164 00:13:45,582 --> 00:13:52,422 Maybe you'll find one you like better. I've got me mind set on an Audrey. 165 00:13:52,422 --> 00:13:58,242 Ah! What are we looking at? Hello, Eli. Is it interesting? Dead boring. 166 00:13:58,242 --> 00:14:01,702 Well, there we are then. Eight Duffields. 167 00:14:01,702 --> 00:14:06,922 Did tha write them all down? Calm yourself, I wrote them all down. 168 00:14:14,682 --> 00:14:20,742 I wonder if she's changed. It's to be hoped she's stopped kneeling on people. 169 00:14:20,742 --> 00:14:26,082 I hope you're going to change before we go looking for her. I am. 170 00:14:26,082 --> 00:14:28,662 I'm going to smarten myself up. 171 00:14:28,662 --> 00:14:35,662 She'll not recognise you if you smarten yourself up. I don't care. You have to make an effort. 172 00:14:35,662 --> 00:14:40,622 "You're a winner"! The wife'll go mad when she knows what it cost! 173 00:14:40,622 --> 00:14:44,322 The old witch even sold something to the dog! 174 00:14:59,510 --> 00:15:02,010 Come on, that man! 175 00:15:02,010 --> 00:15:04,410 I'm coming! 176 00:15:05,430 --> 00:15:08,610 HE CLOMPS DOWN THE STAIRS 177 00:15:14,430 --> 00:15:17,650 Oh! Ta-tee-ta-ta... 178 00:15:17,650 --> 00:15:20,090 Ta-ta-ta-tee... 179 00:15:20,090 --> 00:15:24,290 Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-tee. 180 00:15:25,730 --> 00:15:28,730 It's Yves St La Ferret. 181 00:15:28,730 --> 00:15:33,810 You look ridiculous. The lapels aren't bad. I like the lapels. 182 00:15:33,810 --> 00:15:36,670 It is the best of my wardrobe. 183 00:15:36,670 --> 00:15:41,330 I don't know. Oh, we'll find you something. Well, Clegg will. 184 00:15:47,190 --> 00:15:51,250 I can't wear Cleggy's old suit! It's old-fashioned. 185 00:15:51,250 --> 00:15:57,070 Oh, it's true. It was old-fashioned when I got it. I like old-fashioned. 186 00:15:57,070 --> 00:15:59,670 It's smarter than what you've got. 187 00:15:59,670 --> 00:16:03,430 I can't go courting feeling old-fashioned. 188 00:16:03,430 --> 00:16:06,090 This is a big moment for me. 189 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:11,090 I've got to make a big first impression. You usually do. 190 00:16:15,330 --> 00:16:19,150 Howard's about your size. Howard's a midget. 191 00:16:19,150 --> 00:16:21,470 He's a big midget! 192 00:16:24,930 --> 00:16:27,450 What do you lot want? 193 00:16:27,450 --> 00:16:30,870 It's funny you should say that, Howard... 194 00:16:34,990 --> 00:16:37,410 What chest is he? 195 00:16:37,410 --> 00:16:41,470 Never mind going technical. Find him an old suit. 196 00:16:41,470 --> 00:16:45,250 When he says old suit he means SMART suit. 197 00:16:46,950 --> 00:16:51,570 You're getting very finicky about whose suit you borrow. 198 00:16:51,570 --> 00:16:54,430 It could be a big day for me, Norm. 199 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,790 For me and Audrey both. 200 00:16:56,790 --> 00:16:59,170 Let's not get maudlin. 201 00:17:00,230 --> 00:17:04,790 There's only an old one I used to wear in me wilder days. 202 00:17:06,050 --> 00:17:09,430 You had WILDER days, Howard? 203 00:17:09,430 --> 00:17:13,530 You know what it's like to be young and fashionable. 204 00:17:13,530 --> 00:17:18,230 Fashionable sounds right, Howard. We'll settle for that one, Howard. 205 00:17:20,450 --> 00:17:23,670 Fashionable? Fashionable sounds good. 206 00:17:24,690 --> 00:17:27,170 Just be careful with it. 207 00:17:28,210 --> 00:17:30,830 We'll take care of it, Howard. 208 00:17:30,830 --> 00:17:34,810 It'll be under my personal supervision. 209 00:17:42,450 --> 00:17:44,930 I like the style. 210 00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:48,950 I'm glad something suits. He's very picky. 211 00:17:48,950 --> 00:17:53,370 You feel rejected when somebody turns down your suit. 212 00:17:53,370 --> 00:17:56,070 Especially somebody like him. 213 00:17:56,070 --> 00:18:00,590 Don't knock it. If anyone needs to get more dressy, it's him. 214 00:18:00,590 --> 00:18:03,270 It's a bit tight. 215 00:18:03,270 --> 00:18:06,310 Well, don't fasten the buttons. 216 00:18:06,310 --> 00:18:11,610 That's reckless advice. I hope he meant the jacket, not the trousers. 217 00:18:13,510 --> 00:18:19,210 Don't fasten the buttons if it's the jacket we're talking about. 218 00:18:25,650 --> 00:18:31,270 Ho-ho-ho! You really were WILD in those days, Howard. 219 00:18:31,270 --> 00:18:34,050 DRUM ROLL 220 00:18:40,650 --> 00:18:43,490 It's the old Bo Do-diddly-bo-bo. 221 00:18:43,490 --> 00:18:46,330 I like the style, kid. 222 00:18:46,330 --> 00:18:49,110 Yeah, fits like a glove. 223 00:18:49,110 --> 00:18:51,930 Pity it doesn't fit like a suit. 224 00:18:51,930 --> 00:18:54,990 Ye gods! Did I ever look like that? 225 00:18:54,990 --> 00:18:58,610 It's a bit of class, is this - ba-da-ba-dooby. 226 00:18:58,610 --> 00:19:01,650 Boo, boo, bip, ba, boo-ba-dee 227 00:19:01,650 --> 00:19:04,550 Boo, boo-de-le, boo, be-boo-dee 228 00:19:04,550 --> 00:19:06,150 Boo, boo... 229 00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:13,250 When did you go through a period like this? I thought everybody did. 230 00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:17,570 Not everybody, Howard. 231 00:19:20,850 --> 00:19:24,330 A touch of the old Bo Diddley... 232 00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:27,890 Mind me velvet collar! 233 00:19:37,690 --> 00:19:40,690 That'll be number 12. 234 00:19:43,390 --> 00:19:45,990 Mind Howard's velvet collar! 235 00:19:45,990 --> 00:19:51,190 To tell the truth, I'm hot under the collar myself - now it's close. 236 00:19:52,450 --> 00:19:54,930 My Audrey could be behind that door. 237 00:19:55,970 --> 00:20:00,110 Well, go and find out. I will! I will! 238 00:20:00,110 --> 00:20:03,090 I'm going! I'm going. 239 00:20:19,230 --> 00:20:21,990 Now what? It's not the place. 240 00:20:21,990 --> 00:20:25,470 I got a gut feeling. You're chickening out! 241 00:20:25,470 --> 00:20:29,110 You'll get used to chickening out. I did. 242 00:20:29,110 --> 00:20:34,370 I can't go barging up to the front door like the rent man 243 00:20:34,370 --> 00:20:37,110 just in case Audrey's there. 244 00:20:37,110 --> 00:20:39,790 It's why you came. It's not fair. 245 00:20:39,790 --> 00:20:44,350 Presenting myself after all these years without warning. 246 00:20:44,350 --> 00:20:48,570 I don't want to damage her emotion-er-rally. 247 00:20:49,810 --> 00:20:51,870 Ye gods! 248 00:20:51,870 --> 00:20:54,410 He wants someone to go for him. 249 00:20:54,410 --> 00:20:57,830 You want me to see if Audrey lives there! 250 00:20:57,830 --> 00:21:01,810 I knew tha were a good lad... sometimes. 251 00:21:01,810 --> 00:21:04,250 All right, stay here... 252 00:21:04,250 --> 00:21:07,250 and mind Howard's velvet collar. 253 00:21:30,470 --> 00:21:32,830 A-hem! Er... 254 00:21:32,830 --> 00:21:36,190 I'm looking for the lady of the house. 255 00:21:46,970 --> 00:21:49,890 That's not my Audrey! 256 00:22:20,610 --> 00:22:25,170 What's he dressed up for? He's heading for romance. 257 00:22:28,410 --> 00:22:34,650 He looks a bit shook up. Well, er... He's heading FROM romance. 258 00:22:34,650 --> 00:22:37,670 Everything suddenly went black. 259 00:22:37,670 --> 00:22:40,230 With lace trimmings. 260 00:22:40,230 --> 00:22:44,850 Now, look Wesley, we want a lift to that address. 261 00:22:46,610 --> 00:22:49,010 It's miles away! 262 00:22:49,010 --> 00:22:53,110 That is why we want the lift. The answer's no! 263 00:22:53,110 --> 00:22:56,530 Hang on, Wesley. It's the last on the list. 264 00:22:56,530 --> 00:23:00,650 We're looking for Audrey Duffield, nee Mottershaw. 265 00:23:00,650 --> 00:23:04,690 Audrey Mottershaw? Didn't she have a mucky neck? 266 00:23:04,690 --> 00:23:10,350 No, that was Ruby Milburn. She were HIS bird. She had the mucky neck. 267 00:23:10,350 --> 00:23:12,790 Only at the back. 268 00:23:12,790 --> 00:23:14,910 Mottershaw? 269 00:23:14,910 --> 00:23:19,430 Didn't she used to kneel on your chest? That's the one, yeah. 270 00:23:19,430 --> 00:23:21,970 Showed us all how to shave. 271 00:23:21,970 --> 00:23:28,150 What's he want to see her for? Because... Well, we think he's going insane. 272 00:23:28,150 --> 00:23:31,230 I'm getting nowhere with Nora Batty. 273 00:23:31,230 --> 00:23:34,650 At least she doesn't kneel on your chest. 274 00:23:34,650 --> 00:23:36,930 Isn't life wonderful, hmm? 275 00:23:36,930 --> 00:23:39,790 Even Nora Batty has her good points. 276 00:23:39,790 --> 00:23:42,570 I'll get the Landrover! 277 00:23:50,730 --> 00:23:54,090 She was always heavy with her pastry. 278 00:23:54,090 --> 00:23:57,450 That lodger got too much attention. 279 00:23:57,450 --> 00:24:00,030 I never knew that! 280 00:24:00,030 --> 00:24:04,870 I should have known. When you neglect pastry, it's a bad sign. 281 00:24:04,870 --> 00:24:09,170 Look where you're going, Mother! No good comes of it. 282 00:24:09,170 --> 00:24:12,590 When passion's spent, there's always pastry. 283 00:24:12,590 --> 00:24:17,390 What's the point of doing good pastry? They go off, anyway! 284 00:24:17,390 --> 00:24:22,730 They come back for decent pastry. MINE never went off! 285 00:24:22,730 --> 00:24:27,110 Ah, no! He had certain advantages for not going off. 286 00:24:27,110 --> 00:24:29,770 You'd have killed him! Mother! 287 00:24:37,990 --> 00:24:40,530 Does tha think she'll recognise me? 288 00:24:40,530 --> 00:24:45,170 No chance. I can't recognise you. Don't get too excited. 289 00:24:45,170 --> 00:24:49,010 You've no room for getting too excited. 290 00:24:49,010 --> 00:24:52,870 I mean, it may not be her when we get there. 291 00:24:52,870 --> 00:24:55,830 It's the last Duffield. 292 00:25:07,490 --> 00:25:10,210 What are you doing with this lot? 293 00:25:10,210 --> 00:25:14,590 I'm dropping some stuff off for Auntie Wainwright. 294 00:25:14,590 --> 00:25:19,490 Where do you think you're going? YOU ride in the back. 295 00:25:19,490 --> 00:25:24,450 Why can't I ride in the front? It's all greasy and oily in there. 296 00:25:27,550 --> 00:25:30,310 You see how he looks after you. 297 00:25:47,450 --> 00:25:51,750 The next right, Mother. Are you sure? The next right! 298 00:25:58,790 --> 00:26:02,750 I meant the next ROAD on the right, Mother! 299 00:26:02,750 --> 00:26:04,970 Now she tells me! 300 00:26:12,550 --> 00:26:15,190 I've had enough of this. 301 00:26:15,190 --> 00:26:17,470 I'm getting inside. 302 00:26:25,370 --> 00:26:29,610 Why is there never a man when you want one? 303 00:26:29,610 --> 00:26:32,910 It's so rarely you need one. 304 00:26:32,910 --> 00:26:37,650 We don't need a man. We just need a bit more shove. 305 00:26:37,650 --> 00:26:42,690 I never thought of you as needing a bit more shove. 306 00:26:42,690 --> 00:26:45,570 Is it in the right gear, Mother? 307 00:26:45,570 --> 00:26:51,210 Don't ask me technical questions - you'll have to ask your father! 308 00:27:09,550 --> 00:27:12,030 Ooh! Ow! Argh! 309 00:27:13,190 --> 00:27:16,430 BANGING AND THUMPING Help! Help! 310 00:27:18,670 --> 00:27:21,030 Help! 311 00:27:21,030 --> 00:27:23,730 Let me out! Open the door! 312 00:27:31,050 --> 00:27:33,530 Oh! Oh dear! 313 00:27:34,890 --> 00:27:37,990 Where the hell am I? 314 00:27:39,470 --> 00:27:41,970 Look at the state I'm in! 315 00:27:41,970 --> 00:27:46,990 Listen. Don't worry how you look. It's the wrong Duffield. 316 00:27:46,990 --> 00:27:52,630 What? I've just been told. Audrey Mottershaw that was went to Canada. 317 00:27:52,630 --> 00:27:59,530 Who says? She went to Canada. If you'd asked me I could have told you she'd gone to Canada. 318 00:27:59,530 --> 00:28:05,330 Now she tells me! What WAS he doing in a wardrobe?! 319 00:28:05,330 --> 00:28:09,930 Is he all right? She cares! She cares! 320 00:28:11,390 --> 00:28:13,970 Tha better take care of me, kid. 321 00:28:13,970 --> 00:28:17,450 Tha nearly lost me to Audrey Mottershaw. 322 00:28:53,890 --> 00:28:58,190 Subtitles by BBC - 1995 323 00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:02,790 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 26269

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