Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:32,900 --> 00:00:36,160
COMPO YAWNS
2
00:00:41,660 --> 00:00:46,200
And they think black holes are
only to be found in deep space!
3
00:00:47,460 --> 00:00:53,060
I must say, the concept of a hole
in space, confuses me enormously.
4
00:00:53,060 --> 00:00:56,980
But so did the instructions
on me electric blanket.
5
00:00:56,980 --> 00:01:01,740
And THAT works, so I suppose God
knows what He's doing.
6
00:01:01,740 --> 00:01:05,780
Electric blanket?
Yer great Jessie!
7
00:01:05,780 --> 00:01:09,880
Why didn't yer put a warm brick
in it, like everybody else?
8
00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:14,860
That's a good idea -
next time you open your mouth put a warm brick in it.
9
00:01:14,860 --> 00:01:19,040
I 'ad a ferret once, what could
carry eggs in its mouth.
10
00:01:20,020 --> 00:01:23,760
You've led a really useful life,
haven't you? Aye.
11
00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:26,620
'E bit the milkman.
12
00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:30,760
What bit the milkman?
The ferret what could carry eggs.
13
00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:35,400
Practically full-time
in the dairy business, wasn't it?
14
00:01:43,540 --> 00:01:47,320
I wonder what life's like
in Nora Batty's bedroom.
15
00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:04,660
Another hectic day in the struggle
for existence?
16
00:02:06,260 --> 00:02:09,460
If yer mean the dustbins,
I've seen to 'em.
17
00:02:09,460 --> 00:02:13,700
Is that it? Two flamin' dustbins,
and yer in for early retirement?
18
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:18,220
Why do yer only equate efficiency
with somebody runnin' up and down?
19
00:02:18,220 --> 00:02:21,780
That'll be the day, when I see
somebody runnin' up and down.
20
00:02:22,180 --> 00:02:26,740
No, I tell a lie - There was that
time when yer sat on me hotplate.
21
00:02:26,740 --> 00:02:28,840
Funny!
22
00:02:28,840 --> 00:02:31,000
Yes, I thought so.
23
00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:36,420
It was afterwards when I remembered
where yer brains were, I realised I might've shown more sympathy.
24
00:02:36,420 --> 00:02:39,440
Sympathy? When've you ever
shown me sympathy?
25
00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:45,000
You say that to me? Me, who's
nursed you all these years through thick and gettin' thicker?
26
00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:50,580
I'm the only veteran of the Second
World War who's never made love with the lights on.
27
00:02:50,580 --> 00:02:54,760
Yer should've married some little
idiot who was afraid of the dark.
28
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:57,220
Huh! NOW she tells me!
29
00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:07,460
'Ow's it goin' then, Sid?
30
00:03:07,580 --> 00:03:11,640
Better for seein' you - I thought I
was depressed 'till you walked in.
31
00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:18,880
It's our Nora, she can't do wi' me
'angin' about doin' nowt.
32
00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,060
I know.
33
00:03:20,060 --> 00:03:25,080
I've never seen anybody more bitter
against unemployment - for me.
34
00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:27,700
Packin' you off on
errands, is she? Aye.
35
00:03:27,700 --> 00:03:31,060
Knowin' Nora, separation can't be
all that bad.
36
00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:35,320
It's not leavin' 'er I mind -
it's me pigeons.
37
00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:40,320
She sends me out on errand,
it breaks me routine.
38
00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:46,960
She knows I like to talk to me
pigeons two hours a day.
39
00:03:47,580 --> 00:03:49,180
What about?
40
00:03:49,180 --> 00:03:52,200
Well, what do you talk
to 'em about?
41
00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:54,240
I'm askin'.
42
00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:56,480
OTHER pigeons!
43
00:03:56,980 --> 00:04:00,240
Yer gotta keep 'em aware
of competition.
44
00:04:01,420 --> 00:04:06,280
And now she's sendin' me off to
a furniture sale at auction rooms.
45
00:04:08,660 --> 00:04:10,880
Lettin' 'em out again before
they're cured.
46
00:04:12,340 --> 00:04:15,200
'Ow do, Wal?
'Ow do, Compo?
47
00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:16,820
'Ow do?
48
00:04:16,820 --> 00:04:20,600
That's the spirit, Wally -
look on the bright side!
49
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,620
She's sendin' me off to an auction.
50
00:04:23,620 --> 00:04:26,900
Why doesn't she just divorce you,
like anybody normal?
51
00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:35,080
That sly little Nora - I bet she's
'ouseworkin' up there, dust all round 'er wrinkled stockings.
52
00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:37,960
Hey, Wal...
53
00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,160
What's life like in your bedroom?
54
00:04:41,160 --> 00:04:43,800
I'd sooner be with me pigeons.
55
00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:49,060
Will you stop making an exhibition
of yourself and pay for three teas?
56
00:04:51,420 --> 00:04:53,360
I...I can't find me money.
57
00:04:54,280 --> 00:04:55,880
I've got 'oles in me linin'.
58
00:04:56,860 --> 00:04:59,240
It's 'oly linin's, I've got.
59
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:04,720
God, isn't it pathetic -
the length some people go to, to avoid paying for three teas.
60
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:06,260
Who's payin' then?
61
00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:09,800
Oh look, my shoelace is undone.
62
00:05:11,580 --> 00:05:15,660
Good job I spotted that - y'can
come a nasty cropper tripping over.
63
00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:18,160
Well, that's two down, one to go.
64
00:05:18,260 --> 00:05:20,860
It's easier to pay than go through
all that.
65
00:05:20,860 --> 00:05:23,880
Right, it's exhaustin'
goin' through my pockets.
66
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:25,900
Is that why you went
67
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:27,960
through other people's in school?
68
00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:30,640
Me? You and Chunky Wigglesworth.
69
00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:33,380
I remember Chunky Wigglesworth.
70
00:05:33,380 --> 00:05:39,280
I remember Chunky Wigglesworth -
He used to grab great chunks of yer trousers very carelessly.
71
00:05:39,580 --> 00:05:44,440
Remember him? He was famous for
sitting on people at playtime.
72
00:05:44,580 --> 00:05:47,740
Aye, 'ad to get married to that
lass of Postlewaite's.
73
00:05:47,740 --> 00:05:52,400
Well there it is you see - start
off by sitting on a few people...
74
00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:55,480
What's 'e doin' these days?
75
00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:57,500
'E's a dentist in Macclesfield.
76
00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:00,460
My God! I hope he's washed
his hands.
77
00:06:03,100 --> 00:06:06,280
Get your great boot off
my furniture!
78
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:08,200
Just adjusting me shoelace, madam.
79
00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:11,840
Yer stand there lettin' this lot
trample over the furniture.
80
00:06:11,840 --> 00:06:15,380
'E's not 'urtin' it.
And not improvin' it neither.
81
00:06:15,380 --> 00:06:18,540
I gotta get t'auction rooms.
Ta-ra, Wal.
82
00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:21,040
Get out!
83
00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:24,480
Go on, make people feel welcome.
84
00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:29,880
Oh, we know 'ow champion you are at
makin' folk welcome - when 'ave you ever been pleasant to a customer?
85
00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:31,640
I'm waitin' for one I like.
86
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:35,360
You're always rude.
87
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:37,400
Me? Yes, you.
88
00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:40,180
When do I not make people welcome?
89
00:06:40,180 --> 00:06:44,180
What happens every time our family
pays us a visit?
90
00:06:44,180 --> 00:06:46,860
Your family? I thought we were
talkin' about people.
91
00:06:46,860 --> 00:06:50,340
There you are - see what
the attitude is?
92
00:06:50,340 --> 00:06:51,920
They all know.
93
00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:54,700
They all try to be friendly.
94
00:06:54,700 --> 00:06:56,060
Can't stand Eddie.
95
00:06:56,060 --> 00:07:00,640
When 'e's 'ere, 'e does everything
possible to make you feel at 'ome.
96
00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:02,820
I AM AT 'OME! Cheeky beggar.
97
00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:04,980
Oh, y'know what I mean.
98
00:07:04,980 --> 00:07:09,620
Eddie's always cheerful, famous in
the family for bein' funny.
99
00:07:09,620 --> 00:07:13,680
So 'ow come 'is wife's gone grey?
I feel sorry for that little woman.
100
00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:16,100
Oh we know you feel sorry for her.
101
00:07:16,100 --> 00:07:20,340
I caught yer last Christmas feelin'
sorry with 'er in the cupboard!
102
00:07:20,340 --> 00:07:24,900
We were lookin' for roller skates,
I wanted to show 'er me old skates.
103
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:28,240
SMASHING
104
00:07:35,100 --> 00:07:39,780
Wait! Before we do anythin',
I gotta call at my place for summat.
105
00:07:39,780 --> 00:07:44,540
If we're going walking, let's go -
why call at your place?
106
00:07:44,540 --> 00:07:46,520
I need a clean 'andkerchief.
107
00:07:46,520 --> 00:07:52,160
Ever since I've known you, you've
needed a clean handkerchief. See? What did I tell thee!
108
00:07:52,460 --> 00:07:56,220
What's he up to? Well,
there's only one way to find out.
109
00:07:56,220 --> 00:08:01,680
You can't believe a word that
he says. There's one word he says that I tend to believe.
110
00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:07,600
There was no need for him to use
that word - I didn't intend to catch his shin with me stick.
111
00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:13,220
You expect anybody that scruffy to
be impervious to pain - it's clean people you expect to be sensitive.
112
00:08:13,220 --> 00:08:18,160
He's got a cheek complaining about
my use of the walking stick.
113
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:22,840
There's nobody more
capable on the stick than an ex-drill instructor.
114
00:08:23,980 --> 00:08:27,300
Oh! I beg your pardon!
It's the wasps, y'know.
115
00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:32,040
Sex maniac!
116
00:08:39,573 --> 00:08:41,053
Nearly ready!
117
00:08:41,653 --> 00:08:43,813
Nearly ready for what?
118
00:08:43,813 --> 00:08:45,133
Ta-da!
119
00:08:48,273 --> 00:08:50,713
Valentino lives!
120
00:08:51,453 --> 00:08:54,313
Aw! I only changed me jacket.
121
00:08:54,313 --> 00:08:57,733
I'm still trying to work out
what it is you've changed it for.
122
00:08:57,853 --> 00:09:00,773
It's a blazer.
123
00:09:00,933 --> 00:09:03,193
Does it light up in the dark?
124
00:09:03,193 --> 00:09:05,173
Not too flash, is it?
125
00:09:05,293 --> 00:09:08,253
Heavens no! Whatever gave you
that idea?
126
00:09:08,253 --> 00:09:11,253
I knew you'd start
bein' comical.
127
00:09:11,253 --> 00:09:12,993
If anyone's dressed
for comical.
128
00:09:13,113 --> 00:09:18,593
You're the one that's always
complainin' about me not gettin' dressed up.
129
00:09:18,693 --> 00:09:21,673
So, let that be a lesson to you.
130
00:09:22,533 --> 00:09:25,473
All right, all right -
I'll take it off.
131
00:09:30,873 --> 00:09:33,333
Oh there's no need, not for us.
132
00:09:33,333 --> 00:09:35,093
Sure? Well, yes...
133
00:09:35,093 --> 00:09:38,873
Well, I'm pretty certain
I'm sure.
134
00:09:38,873 --> 00:09:43,493
Couldn't y'just cover it up with
something? Like six feet of earth.
135
00:09:43,493 --> 00:09:46,053
I mean, like a raincoat.
136
00:09:46,053 --> 00:09:47,213
I ain't got one.
137
00:09:47,213 --> 00:09:48,413
He'll lend you his.
I'll lend you mine.
138
00:09:48,493 --> 00:09:50,933
You don't like it, do yer?
139
00:09:51,673 --> 00:09:53,853
Tell him.
You tell him.
140
00:09:53,853 --> 00:09:58,813
I'm askin' both of yer.
Well...er...it's different.
141
00:09:58,813 --> 00:10:02,053
Look me in the eye and tell me
the truth. The truth...?
142
00:10:02,053 --> 00:10:04,353
It's terrible.
143
00:10:04,353 --> 00:10:09,193
Well, not exactly terrible.
What then? Well...almost terrible.
144
00:10:09,193 --> 00:10:15,833
Well, if he had the right
trousers and if it fit him better round here... A gusset in the back?
145
00:10:18,733 --> 00:10:21,433
Stop maulin' me!
Better already.
146
00:10:21,433 --> 00:10:25,913
Just shorten the arms a bit
and you'd look...you'd look...
147
00:10:25,913 --> 00:10:27,793
terrible!
148
00:10:27,953 --> 00:10:32,453
I want to know what he's up to -
what's going on in that tiny mind?
149
00:10:32,453 --> 00:10:36,393
Whatever it is, it's covered with
solid brilliantine.
150
00:10:37,073 --> 00:10:39,873
Smells like a gipsy violinist.
151
00:10:39,993 --> 00:10:43,093
I just wanted to do meself
up a bit.
152
00:10:43,093 --> 00:10:48,153
You don't have to go mad - why not
start gently with yer trouser zip?
153
00:10:48,153 --> 00:10:52,753
It's done up.
I thought your zip had gone. It has, I'm usin' a safety pin!
154
00:10:54,033 --> 00:10:58,793
I think that's the bravest thing
I've ever heard. Thank you, Norman.
155
00:11:03,873 --> 00:11:06,433
But what's it all in aid of?
156
00:11:06,533 --> 00:11:10,373
I just want me photo took.
157
00:11:10,373 --> 00:11:13,653
Vain little thing!
You had it taken at school.
158
00:11:13,653 --> 00:11:18,573
This may be worth encouraging,
perhaps he wants a passport photo.
159
00:11:18,573 --> 00:11:22,453
Perhaps he'll apply for a passport
and leave us all for a while.
160
00:11:22,693 --> 00:11:25,973
What do I want a passport for?
I'm not going anywhere.
161
00:11:26,673 --> 00:11:28,513
You could at least think about it.
162
00:11:28,513 --> 00:11:33,893
You might like foreign travel -
you could go ferreting in Mongolia.
163
00:11:35,413 --> 00:11:37,133
But I'd 'ave to learn the language.
164
00:11:37,133 --> 00:11:40,833
Well, if you can't speak ferret
now, yer never will.
165
00:11:44,973 --> 00:11:46,733
What's he looking for?
166
00:11:46,733 --> 00:11:50,753
Oh..happiness, good fortune -
especially with his saftey pin.
167
00:11:50,753 --> 00:11:53,293
I'm lookin' for me camera.
168
00:11:53,293 --> 00:11:57,413
The trouble with you is, you don't
search in a methodical manner.
169
00:11:57,413 --> 00:12:00,573
I don't lose things
in a methodical manner.
170
00:12:00,713 --> 00:12:04,193
Wading in, scattering bits
everywhere, same as at meal times.
171
00:12:04,893 --> 00:12:07,993
I got a little Instamatic 'ere.
172
00:12:08,153 --> 00:12:13,453
Yes, well we know all about that -
but, at the moment, thank God, it's secure behind a saftey pin.
173
00:12:13,453 --> 00:12:16,153
'Ere it is, come on, let's go.
174
00:12:16,613 --> 00:12:18,853
Where to? Next door.
175
00:12:18,853 --> 00:12:22,133
Isn't that Nora Batty's?
That's right.
176
00:12:22,893 --> 00:12:26,713
Well you didn't think I wanted
me photo took in 'ere?
177
00:12:26,713 --> 00:12:30,753
I mean look at it!
It's disgraceful.
178
00:12:35,873 --> 00:12:40,553
I've always 'ad this terrible
desire to 'ave me photo took in Nora Batty's.
179
00:12:41,173 --> 00:12:43,853
Who's goin' to work the camera?
180
00:12:43,853 --> 00:12:49,473
You know I'd like to, but if it's
got more than two moving parts, I'll only get me finger fast.
181
00:12:49,473 --> 00:12:52,393
All yer gotta do is
press this 'ere.
182
00:12:52,393 --> 00:12:55,433
That's what they told me on me
wedding night.
183
00:12:56,013 --> 00:12:58,633
I never did get the hang of it.
184
00:13:00,033 --> 00:13:01,833
Oh, give it to me.
185
00:13:01,833 --> 00:13:05,333
We might only get one shot,
don't want no fluffin'.
186
00:13:05,333 --> 00:13:10,093
I can operate a simple camera!
I was trained on the Bren gun.
187
00:13:10,893 --> 00:13:13,693
That's a professional
trigger finger.
188
00:13:13,693 --> 00:13:16,573
Aye! An' 'ere's
two more to go with it!
189
00:13:21,773 --> 00:13:24,953
I'm standing here
talking to your wellie.
190
00:13:24,953 --> 00:13:28,113
And my advice is,
don't disturb Nora.
191
00:13:28,113 --> 00:13:30,193
She's all alone.
192
00:13:30,773 --> 00:13:33,713
She's been designed
that way.
193
00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:39,593
It'll make 'er day!
I bring a little colour into 'er life!
194
00:13:40,093 --> 00:13:41,853
Yer will in that blazer.
195
00:13:41,853 --> 00:13:43,873
Yer like an
overdressed zebra.
196
00:13:43,873 --> 00:13:45,073
Ooops!
197
00:13:48,173 --> 00:13:52,893
Hey up, Nora! It's only me, come to
put an end to your loneliness.
198
00:13:52,893 --> 00:13:54,433
This is romance
199
00:13:54,433 --> 00:13:56,213
knockin' on your door.
200
00:13:58,113 --> 00:14:02,253
Get away! I don't want no advances
from people in funny trousers.
201
00:14:02,253 --> 00:14:03,933
It's only me!
202
00:14:04,453 --> 00:14:07,453
Get off me steps!
203
00:14:09,333 --> 00:14:12,513
We're all right -
she's in a good mood.
204
00:14:13,113 --> 00:14:14,573
She's what?
205
00:14:14,573 --> 00:14:16,553
I can read 'er like a book.
206
00:14:18,393 --> 00:14:21,713
My God! It's not something
I'd want to read in bed.
207
00:14:21,833 --> 00:14:26,713
Don't stand down there you two,
come up 'ere - we'll all press the bell together.
208
00:14:28,573 --> 00:14:30,673
Who's he talking to?
209
00:14:30,893 --> 00:14:35,993
Can't be talking to us
d'you think? Who is he anyway? Never seen him before.
210
00:14:36,113 --> 00:14:39,353
I never get any 'elp
from you two.
211
00:14:39,733 --> 00:14:41,873
I'll be back, Nora.
212
00:14:43,153 --> 00:14:44,513
You're weird!
213
00:14:45,393 --> 00:14:49,393
Yer can't kid me! I know you've
got a lot of passion
214
00:14:49,393 --> 00:14:51,433
inside that pinny.
215
00:14:57,613 --> 00:15:02,073
By heck! She's like
Margaret Lockwood!
216
00:15:02,813 --> 00:15:07,753
It's just like 'avin' yer own
Wicked Lady livin' next door.
217
00:15:09,653 --> 00:15:11,353
Oh...sorry.
218
00:15:14,013 --> 00:15:16,273
You two weren't much 'elp.
219
00:15:17,513 --> 00:15:19,793
He's very steady under fire.
220
00:15:19,893 --> 00:15:22,453
I tell yer,
she's not in a bad mood.
221
00:15:22,453 --> 00:15:26,413
It looked like a bad
mood to me. For Nora, that's a good day!
222
00:15:26,413 --> 00:15:27,673
She came at you with a mop.
223
00:15:27,673 --> 00:15:29,953
Precisely.
Very precisely.
224
00:15:30,193 --> 00:15:35,353
Which I could soon teach you to
sidestep - it's one of the elementary moves in Basic Bayonet.
225
00:15:35,593 --> 00:15:39,073
I know 'ow to sidestep.
Then why didn't you?
226
00:15:41,613 --> 00:15:44,593
'Ave you never
'eard of sexual foreplay?
227
00:15:46,753 --> 00:15:53,433
You mean all that stuff
she was doing with the mop was a sort of courtship dance?
228
00:15:53,513 --> 00:15:55,713
Of course it is!
229
00:16:03,093 --> 00:16:08,593
Isn't nature wonderful? For all
the world you might've thought she was trying to flatten you.
230
00:16:09,873 --> 00:16:12,593
I know what she's doin'.
231
00:16:12,593 --> 00:16:16,713
Are you saying she's encouraging
you? 'Course she is, the darlin'.
232
00:16:16,713 --> 00:16:17,813
Rubbish!
233
00:16:17,813 --> 00:16:23,193
Listen, Noddy! When it comes to
ferrets and women, I know 'ow to 'andle them.
234
00:16:23,193 --> 00:16:29,913
I just hope you never get them
confused...the thought of Nora Batty let loose down a rabbit hole...
235
00:16:31,153 --> 00:16:35,373
Norm, listen, when she's usin'
'er mop, she's just playin'.
236
00:16:35,373 --> 00:16:38,973
It's just when I go too far,
she belts me with the yard brush.
237
00:16:39,293 --> 00:16:41,753
His love life is pure poetry.
238
00:16:41,853 --> 00:16:44,953
Why d'you bother?
Yer mean yer don't know?
239
00:16:44,953 --> 00:16:50,113
When you look at that woman, she
doesn't send your pulse racin'?
240
00:16:50,493 --> 00:16:51,913
Only for cover.
241
00:16:52,633 --> 00:16:56,173
She frightens me and I've tackled
the Goering Division.
242
00:16:57,113 --> 00:17:01,173
Yer should see 'er by moonlight,
comin' back from bingo.
243
00:17:01,993 --> 00:17:06,293
She always gets dolled up for
bingo, most women do.
244
00:17:06,293 --> 00:17:11,093
I'd be quite 'appy to be
the plaything for a bunch of bingo lovers.
245
00:17:12,813 --> 00:17:14,773
Watch that camera.
246
00:17:14,773 --> 00:17:20,113
I am watching the camera - good
God, man, I'm not a novice when it comes to precision instruments.
247
00:17:21,973 --> 00:17:24,493
Oh, you dozy great prong!
248
00:17:25,013 --> 00:17:26,473
Did you feel it?
249
00:17:27,073 --> 00:17:32,053
Did you feel that earth tremour?
It went right under my boots.
250
00:17:32,053 --> 00:17:34,713
A sort of quiver.
251
00:17:34,713 --> 00:17:39,313
It may be that I'm quicker to feel
these things than a civilian.
252
00:17:39,313 --> 00:17:43,513
I didn't just drop it -
no, it was decision time.
253
00:17:43,513 --> 00:17:47,373
I needed to have my hands free to
save you from the earthquake.
254
00:17:49,173 --> 00:17:50,913
What earthquake?
255
00:17:51,373 --> 00:17:54,153
Ah, fortunately, it didn't develop.
256
00:17:54,153 --> 00:17:57,893
Which sounds a fairly accurate
diagnosis of this camera.
257
00:17:58,973 --> 00:18:05,753
Oh give it to me, it'll be all
right...they always rattle a bit, it'll be all right.
258
00:18:05,753 --> 00:18:11,753
Very good for a camera - wallop!
A prawn bouncin' it on the floor.
259
00:18:12,193 --> 00:18:16,713
We'll find out by taking a photo.
No, I've already had one taken.
260
00:18:16,713 --> 00:18:20,173
There's not much film left.
Taken on me wedding day.
261
00:18:20,173 --> 00:18:25,733
We ought to try it, 'specially as
I took the trouble to drop it safely away from the earthquake.
262
00:18:25,733 --> 00:18:27,913
I'll try the camera.
263
00:18:27,913 --> 00:18:35,313
They photographed me with me wife
and then with the bridesmaids, the rest of the day was boring too.
264
00:18:37,573 --> 00:18:39,113
Where's he gone now?
265
00:18:39,673 --> 00:18:44,233
Where are you going now? Next door.
Why are you going there again?
266
00:18:44,233 --> 00:18:48,653
I'm goin' to 'ave me photo took -
in Nora's bedroom!
267
00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:50,773
I think he means it!
268
00:18:50,773 --> 00:18:54,033
I do mean it! But that's ridiculous!
269
00:18:54,033 --> 00:18:57,353
That's what they said about
climbin' Mount Everest.
270
00:18:57,353 --> 00:19:01,173
He's right y'know - it must be one
of the few unexplored places left.
271
00:19:01,173 --> 00:19:03,313
See, Norman understands.
272
00:19:03,313 --> 00:19:07,733
It's a sort of ambition, to 'ave
this photo to 'and round the pub.
273
00:19:08,953 --> 00:19:12,753
An' say, hey, that's me
in Nora's bedroom.
274
00:19:13,273 --> 00:19:18,333
But she'll never let you near!
I know it's not goin'to be easy.
275
00:19:18,333 --> 00:19:23,393
But I just want to be able
to crack this one spectacular achievement.
276
00:19:23,393 --> 00:19:28,213
It makes you proud to be English -
you'll stick a Union Jack on her?
277
00:19:28,993 --> 00:19:32,673
I know I've not done much with me
life - except enjoy it.
278
00:19:33,293 --> 00:19:40,313
I mean, when 'ave I ever got
down to something that makes people gasp and nudge each other?
279
00:19:41,353 --> 00:19:44,793
Well, there was her who used to
drive the dumper for McAlpines.
280
00:19:45,413 --> 00:19:47,233
Oh 'er!
281
00:19:47,233 --> 00:19:51,093
No...no, me mind's made up -
I'm goin' to 'ave me photo took.
282
00:19:51,093 --> 00:19:56,533
Then we shan't stand in your way.
No, no. Great! That's what friends are for. Right, definitely.
283
00:19:56,533 --> 00:19:58,673
'Course I shall need some 'elp.
284
00:20:00,353 --> 00:20:03,793
And I was g...COME BACK 'ERE!
Yer rotten devils!
285
00:20:06,513 --> 00:20:09,973
Norm, Norm!
'Ang on a minute!
286
00:20:09,973 --> 00:20:16,533
We don't wish to be rude, stranger
but... Personally, I've no objection to being rude.
287
00:20:16,533 --> 00:20:19,393
All we need is...
What's this "we"?
288
00:20:19,393 --> 00:20:22,333
..is to knock on Nora's door.
289
00:20:22,333 --> 00:20:27,513
That's a damn reckless thing to
suggest to anybody, knocking on Nora Batty's door.
290
00:20:28,153 --> 00:20:32,713
All we need is a reasonable story
for gettin' in the 'ouse.
291
00:20:32,713 --> 00:20:35,453
What kind of story will get us
into the house?
292
00:20:35,453 --> 00:20:40,953
Well, we know Wally isn't at 'ome,
so, we'll say we've come to see Wally.
293
00:20:40,953 --> 00:20:44,793
She'll say 'e's not in, so we'll
say, "Thank you, we'll wait."
294
00:20:48,333 --> 00:20:49,933
Get off me steps!
295
00:20:52,353 --> 00:20:55,093
You heard, she said,
"Get off me steps!"
296
00:20:55,093 --> 00:20:56,293
She always does.
297
00:20:56,373 --> 00:20:58,053
Take off yer dozy lot!
298
00:20:58,153 --> 00:21:02,433
No, I tell a lie - sometimes she
says, "Take off yer dozy lot!"
299
00:21:02,433 --> 00:21:03,933
Come on.
300
00:21:06,773 --> 00:21:09,233
Go on, ring the bell.
301
00:21:09,973 --> 00:21:11,793
He means you.
302
00:21:11,793 --> 00:21:15,333
Oh no, I saw him,
he was talking to you.
303
00:21:15,333 --> 00:21:17,353
Go on.
304
00:21:21,993 --> 00:21:24,993
I hate messing about with
anything electrical.
305
00:21:25,113 --> 00:21:28,873
Listen, I've got the 'ard bit -
I've gotta get into Nora's bedroom.
306
00:21:29,493 --> 00:21:32,653
True, compared to that risk,
307
00:21:32,653 --> 00:21:34,933
what can possibly happen to me?
308
00:21:39,233 --> 00:21:43,853
Get off me steps! Tormentin'
a respectable married woman!
309
00:21:43,853 --> 00:21:47,393
Urrgh! I see tha stockings
are wrinkled.
310
00:21:47,393 --> 00:21:51,973
There 'e goes again! Talkin' legs -
he's always talkin' legs!
311
00:21:52,053 --> 00:21:54,293
I think 'e's sick.
312
00:21:54,493 --> 00:22:00,153
I'm sick of them stockings -
that is no way to treat Margaret Lockwood's legs.
313
00:22:09,633 --> 00:22:14,153
Something always goes wrong
when I touch anything electrical.
314
00:22:14,153 --> 00:22:17,113
I wouldn't mind but I was raising
me cap at the time.
315
00:22:17,113 --> 00:22:20,613
You feel such a fool raising
yer cap to a yard brush.
316
00:22:21,413 --> 00:22:23,633
I 'ope this thing still works.
317
00:22:23,773 --> 00:22:28,793
It doesn't matter really, she's
not going to let you over her doorstep, let alone her bedroom.
318
00:22:29,493 --> 00:22:30,573
Whose bedroom?
319
00:22:30,573 --> 00:22:31,693
Nora Batty's.
320
00:22:33,293 --> 00:22:34,733
Whatever for?
321
00:22:34,733 --> 00:22:36,273
You might well ask!
322
00:22:36,273 --> 00:22:39,993
It's just a challenge.
You mean like the last war?
323
00:22:41,633 --> 00:22:44,553
Well, like some of the bad bits
of it anyway.
324
00:22:44,773 --> 00:22:47,333
It's just an ambition.
325
00:22:54,013 --> 00:22:55,593
What's up wi' you then?
326
00:22:55,593 --> 00:23:00,073
It's that bit o' furniture
I bought at the auction room.
327
00:23:00,913 --> 00:23:04,913
I tried to shift it on me own,
but I couldn't move it very far.
328
00:23:05,253 --> 00:23:06,493
How far?
329
00:23:06,493 --> 00:23:08,193
Just off me foot.
330
00:23:11,713 --> 00:23:16,633
What I really need is someone
to give me 'elp to carry it.
331
00:23:18,573 --> 00:23:20,833
Exactly what is this furniture?
332
00:23:21,773 --> 00:23:25,053
A wardrobe for our Nora's bedroom.
333
00:23:39,633 --> 00:23:43,493
And you don't mind smuggling him
into your wife's bedroom?
334
00:23:43,493 --> 00:23:49,573
What kind of world is it coming to
if a fella can't do a little favour for 'is mates?
335
00:23:49,573 --> 00:23:51,433
Very tolerant.
336
00:23:51,433 --> 00:23:58,413
'E's 'elpin' t'carry wardrobe.
Yes, but will be be able to carry it with him inside?
337
00:24:00,173 --> 00:24:02,473
'Course tha will.
338
00:24:03,553 --> 00:24:08,113
Three great hulkin' blokes
like...er...
339
00:24:08,113 --> 00:24:13,473
Well, two great hulkin' blokes
like...er - of course yer will!
340
00:24:15,553 --> 00:24:18,173
There's only one way to find out.
341
00:24:19,993 --> 00:24:22,893
Just remember which way up
tha's carryin' me.
342
00:24:22,973 --> 00:24:24,113
Just lie down.
343
00:24:24,213 --> 00:24:25,973
Make a noise like a coat hanger.
344
00:24:33,053 --> 00:24:38,813
Y'know, there's something very
satisfying about locking him in a dark, confined place.
345
00:24:39,133 --> 00:24:41,973
Why didn't we think of it before?
346
00:24:42,913 --> 00:24:47,853
Well, what about the danger of
not being able to breathe?
347
00:24:47,853 --> 00:24:50,693
Oh, are you worried about that?
348
00:24:50,693 --> 00:24:51,973
Aren't you?
349
00:24:51,973 --> 00:24:53,373
Not really.
350
00:24:53,373 --> 00:24:58,313
No, it might make us puff and pant
a bit, carrying him up the hill, but we'll still be able to breathe.
351
00:24:58,313 --> 00:25:00,613
I meant HIM!
352
00:25:01,493 --> 00:25:03,253
Oh, him.
353
00:25:03,253 --> 00:25:05,593
Think HE'LL be able to breathe?
354
00:25:05,593 --> 00:25:09,013
I don't doubt it,
he'll do anything for spite.
355
00:25:11,293 --> 00:25:13,453
Can yer breathe?
356
00:25:13,453 --> 00:25:15,393
'Course I can.
357
00:25:15,393 --> 00:25:18,653
Stop putting ideas in his head -
take your end.
358
00:25:23,313 --> 00:25:25,653
'E's goin' to be 'eavy.
359
00:25:29,733 --> 00:25:35,293
Yes, you're probably right...
I think a little lubrication is indicated.
360
00:25:39,773 --> 00:25:42,113
Right, ready when you are.
361
00:25:43,453 --> 00:25:45,733
Well, come on then!
362
00:25:46,933 --> 00:25:48,873
What's 'appenin'?
363
00:25:48,873 --> 00:25:52,253
What're yer doin' up there?
'Oldin' a meetin'?
364
00:25:52,253 --> 00:25:55,313
All together now!
365
00:25:58,293 --> 00:26:00,473
Come on!
366
00:26:02,173 --> 00:26:03,953
Where are yer?
367
00:26:06,953 --> 00:26:09,873
It's about time!
368
00:26:14,893 --> 00:26:16,593
Get in step!
369
00:26:17,873 --> 00:26:20,133
Yer gotta get
the rhythm!
370
00:26:20,133 --> 00:26:23,313
Oh, dear!
371
00:26:27,633 --> 00:26:30,633
Thanks for the lift, Albert.
Yer welcome.
372
00:26:48,193 --> 00:26:51,773
I tell yer, I'm pig sick
of bein' in 'ere.
373
00:26:57,653 --> 00:26:59,733
What are yer doin'?
374
00:26:59,733 --> 00:27:02,913
Careful! I'm all of a 'eap!
375
00:27:02,913 --> 00:27:06,193
I've even got me wellies
in me mouth.
376
00:27:06,193 --> 00:27:09,873
We're nearly there.
About time!
377
00:27:16,613 --> 00:27:18,653
Turn your end round.
378
00:27:40,833 --> 00:27:43,493
Y'don't think I'm 'avin' THAT
in me 'ouse do yer?
379
00:27:43,773 --> 00:27:44,953
But Nora!
380
00:27:45,693 --> 00:27:48,333
Take it back to the auction room!
381
00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:50,853
Can't we just put it inside?
382
00:27:50,853 --> 00:27:52,373
Not in my 'ouse!
383
00:27:52,733 --> 00:27:54,893
Stop pushin'!
384
00:27:54,893 --> 00:27:56,873
Take it down them stairs!
385
00:27:58,933 --> 00:28:00,333
Bloody 'ell!
386
00:28:01,533 --> 00:28:02,933
Who said that?
387
00:28:02,933 --> 00:28:05,373
I did.
I did. I did.
388
00:28:07,533 --> 00:28:10,293
Go on! Get out of it!
389
00:28:18,973 --> 00:28:21,853
Yer bloody great....
390
00:28:26,433 --> 00:28:28,793
I don't know what the world's
coming to.
391
00:28:28,793 --> 00:28:31,933
You never used to hear language
like that in a wardrobe.
392
00:28:32,053 --> 00:28:33,513
What did 'e say?
393
00:28:34,573 --> 00:28:38,653
I think he's trying to tell us
he's finished with photography.
394
00:28:51,253 --> 00:28:52,973
Come in.
395
00:28:52,973 --> 00:28:55,973
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
396
00:28:56,023 --> 00:29:00,573
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
32804
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
