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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:34,480 Here we are then. I knew it as soon as I saw it on the map. 2 00:00:34,480 --> 00:00:37,680 The ideal beginners' slope for hang-gliding. 3 00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:41,000 Down there? You mean I've got to run down there? 4 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:42,840 Well, of course down there. 5 00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:46,240 What kind of a hang-gliding enthusiast runs uphill? 6 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:49,940 I'm going to start on the flat. 7 00:00:49,940 --> 00:00:52,520 It's a picturesque place for an accident. 8 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:55,780 Aye, my flaming accident. 9 00:00:55,780 --> 00:00:58,080 Will you listen a minute? 10 00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:01,360 I didn't select this place just off the top of my head. 11 00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:04,980 No, more like out of your... Ah, ah, ah! 12 00:01:04,980 --> 00:01:08,340 After very careful scrutiny of the map I selected this place 13 00:01:08,340 --> 00:01:10,820 for the launching site for several good reasons. 14 00:01:10,820 --> 00:01:14,260 And I am rejecting it for several good reasons. 15 00:01:14,260 --> 00:01:19,200 Couldn't he start with something smaller, like just a broken leg? 16 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,000 We've got a gentle slope here. 17 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,800 If he fails to take off, he can't break his neck. 18 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:26,640 Oh, I see. 19 00:01:26,640 --> 00:01:29,560 It's only if I take off I'm going to break my neck. 20 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:32,860 You're not going to break your neck. 21 00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:35,500 It's all been calculated to the final detail. 22 00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:37,740 I shouldn't let him use words like "final". 23 00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:42,480 Oh, I'm fed up with this hang-gliding. 24 00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:45,000 What do you mean you're fed up with hang-gliding? 25 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,360 You've not started yet. 26 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:50,820 Look, you'll be all right. You can't bang into anything round here. 27 00:01:50,820 --> 00:01:55,200 And if you do get airborne, look at all the space you've got. 28 00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:56,520 Not right up there. 29 00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:58,760 I mean, you're not going that far. 30 00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:00,600 And why aren't you going that far? 31 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:03,720 Because I'm going to sit here on my fanny and not move. 32 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:07,160 I will have a safety line on you. 33 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,900 If you start to go too high, 34 00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:12,640 we'll be able to pull you down again. 35 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:15,940 How high is too high? 36 00:02:15,940 --> 00:02:20,640 You name it. 5 ft 8. 37 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:25,780 You can't back out now, not after Wally spent his time making your flying machine. 38 00:02:25,780 --> 00:02:29,840 He can always convert it into another pigeon coop. 39 00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:34,000 And what happens if I get flying and land up in the reservoir? 40 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,360 That is the beauty of my whole plan. 41 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:38,640 Oh, aye? 42 00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:41,400 The final safety factor. There it is again. 43 00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:43,120 That word, "final". 44 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:46,040 We don't like that word, "final". Scrub that word, "final". 45 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:49,140 All right, your ultimate safety factor. 46 00:02:49,140 --> 00:02:52,960 If you get airborne and something goes wrong, then, bingo! Bingo? 47 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:55,000 What does he mean, bingo? 48 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:58,180 Clickety click, 66, I'm in a fix. 49 00:02:58,180 --> 00:03:02,840 No, I mean you'll land nice and gently in the water instead of having a nasty crunch. 50 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:06,960 What he means is, that instead of a nasty crunch you're going to drown 51 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:13,220 He's not going to drown. 52 00:03:13,220 --> 00:03:17,560 Sid and Wally will be standing by in the rescue boat. 53 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:20,960 You see? Comprehensive safety planning. 54 00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:22,900 Who's driving? 55 00:03:22,900 --> 00:03:24,420 Does it matter? 56 00:03:24,420 --> 00:03:26,100 It does if it's Sid. 57 00:03:26,100 --> 00:03:28,440 Have you seen him driving his chip van? 58 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:31,240 Batter all over the pavement. 59 00:03:31,240 --> 00:03:33,300 Don't worry about petty details. 60 00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:35,480 The first thing we have to do is try and transform 61 00:03:35,480 --> 00:03:38,800 some of this bone idle flab into serviceable working muscle. 62 00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:42,760 Give over, Wally's building me hang-glider. 63 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:44,780 I don't have to flap me arms. 64 00:03:44,780 --> 00:03:49,940 You can't go leaping up into the wild blue yonder without a bit of preliminary exercise. 65 00:03:52,740 --> 00:03:54,920 He's power-mad. 66 00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:57,300 I'm proud of you, kid. 67 00:03:57,300 --> 00:04:00,280 The first solo flight across the reservoir. 68 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:03,660 The first solo flight over Sid and Wally. 69 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:09,260 If only Nora could see me now. 70 00:04:09,260 --> 00:04:12,420 With those holes in your trousers, she probably has. 71 00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:19,940 Ho ho ho. 72 00:04:21,760 --> 00:04:23,020 Well, there we are then. 73 00:04:23,020 --> 00:04:26,740 Apparatus for the development of sound shoulder muscles. 74 00:04:26,740 --> 00:04:29,760 Or to give it its less technical title, a bit of rope and a ladder. 75 00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:31,820 Now, up you get. 76 00:04:31,820 --> 00:04:34,560 Where? Where? Where do you think? Grab hold of the ladder. 77 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:36,100 That's too high for me to reach. 78 00:04:36,100 --> 00:04:39,300 Well, jump, you idle shower, let yourself dangle from it. 79 00:04:39,300 --> 00:04:43,160 Wow, this flying business is more difficult than you think. 80 00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:45,000 I can do it, Norm, I can do it. 81 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,280 I used to do a lot of this at school. 82 00:04:47,280 --> 00:04:52,660 It's true, I remember. He was one of the all-time great danglers. 83 00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:56,200 It was algebra you used to fall down at a lot. 84 00:04:56,200 --> 00:05:00,460 That really used to get on my nipple. 85 00:05:00,460 --> 00:05:04,120 "Find out what X equals." How could you? 86 00:05:04,120 --> 00:05:06,320 It were always something flamin' different. 87 00:05:07,340 --> 00:05:10,120 Get on with it. Right. 88 00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:16,260 Why do people always do that? What? 89 00:05:16,260 --> 00:05:18,480 Hoist up their trousers and spit on their hands. 90 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:22,560 You think they should spit on their trousers and hoist up their hands? 91 00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:24,140 It's a dirty habit. 92 00:05:24,140 --> 00:05:29,880 Oh no, Foggy. Now, my dirtiest habit... We do not want to know. 93 00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:32,480 All right then, here we go. 94 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,680 Geronimo! 95 00:05:38,820 --> 00:05:41,240 Right, what's next? 96 00:05:41,240 --> 00:05:42,880 What a pathetic effort. 97 00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:46,860 I can see we are in for the aeronautical event of the year(! It's his back. 98 00:05:46,860 --> 00:05:50,960 It's a lifetime spent frittering away his substance on Woodbines and curious women. 99 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:54,220 Aye, my life's not been wasted. Can we give him a lift up? 100 00:05:54,220 --> 00:05:57,320 Well, I don't like handling him unnecessarily. 101 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:01,940 That's because I'm scruffy, ain't it? Only on the surface. 102 00:06:01,940 --> 00:06:04,460 The trouble is you've got to lift him by the surface. 103 00:06:04,460 --> 00:06:08,440 It's all go, this hang-gliding, ain't it? 104 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:11,180 Right. 105 00:06:11,180 --> 00:06:13,320 Whatever you do, don't look for a handle. 106 00:06:21,900 --> 00:06:24,880 It's his back. Ah, well, back to the drawing board. 107 00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:31,220 No, if a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing... Well... 108 00:06:31,220 --> 00:06:34,560 That's what I always say, Norm, always put off till tomorrow 109 00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:36,600 if you've got lumbered with it today. 110 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:41,000 Right. 111 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,720 Up! 112 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:46,440 Up, up, up, up! 113 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:48,100 Up, up! 114 00:06:48,100 --> 00:06:50,340 Ah... Oh... 115 00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,540 By heck, it's high up here. 116 00:06:58,540 --> 00:07:00,460 Spoken like a true astronaut. 117 00:07:00,460 --> 00:07:04,780 A child of our time. His mother was frightened by a rag-and-bone man. 118 00:07:04,780 --> 00:07:07,740 The result you can see there dangling before your very eyes. 119 00:07:07,740 --> 00:07:11,560 Hey, it sounds as if Wally's arrived with the flying machine. 120 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:12,980 Don't leave me! Don't leave me! 121 00:07:12,980 --> 00:07:16,120 Oh, just let go, you'll land on your feet. Where? 122 00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:18,960 X marks the spot. 123 00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:20,920 Norm! I know what X equals. 124 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:22,400 What? Help! 125 00:07:26,920 --> 00:07:28,480 How do, Sid? How do, Wally? 126 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:29,820 How do? 127 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:33,080 Tha've made it, Wally? 128 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,520 Aye. 129 00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:37,720 Does tha' think it'll fly? 130 00:07:37,720 --> 00:07:40,020 Like a bird. 131 00:07:40,020 --> 00:07:44,040 When he says like a bird, he means like a bird. 132 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:56,520 Clever, isn't it? Well, it's different, Wally. 133 00:07:56,520 --> 00:07:58,680 I like the colour. 134 00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:00,640 It looks like a rotten pigeon. 135 00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:03,440 It's what I know best, is pigeons. 136 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:05,400 And pigeons fly, don't they? 137 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:09,580 Oh aye, there's nobody flies sweeter than a pigeon. 138 00:08:09,580 --> 00:08:11,780 There you are, you see. What did I tell you? 139 00:08:11,780 --> 00:08:15,700 I'm not going up in that. 140 00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:19,400 Hey, are we going to take this off my van roof or aren't we? 141 00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:22,260 Oh, yes, of course we are. 142 00:08:22,260 --> 00:08:24,960 Don't worry about the pilot, he doesn't really mean it. 143 00:08:24,960 --> 00:08:29,960 It's the excitement. You know how temperamental these pigeon fanciers are. 144 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:31,960 Pigeon. 145 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:35,980 The only advice I can give is keep your head down 146 00:08:35,980 --> 00:08:40,960 and before you come in to land, circle around the loft three times 147 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:44,100 to see if there's any cats about. 148 00:08:44,100 --> 00:08:49,440 They're only joking, because we're all green with envy that it's you that's going up and not us. 149 00:08:49,440 --> 00:08:51,680 Ah yes, sure. I wish it was me. 150 00:08:51,680 --> 00:08:53,620 Pigeon. 151 00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:57,469 Why didn't he made one to look like a ferret? 152 00:09:04,366 --> 00:09:07,826 Let me ask you a non-technical question, Foggy. 153 00:09:07,826 --> 00:09:11,026 Don't blind me with science, or that very enthusiastic, 154 00:09:11,026 --> 00:09:14,646 persuasive talk known outside political circles as crap. 155 00:09:16,206 --> 00:09:19,566 In your opinion, honestly now, 156 00:09:19,566 --> 00:09:24,006 will there be any danger? No, there'll be no danger whatsoever. 157 00:09:24,006 --> 00:09:25,846 I mean, how can we be in any danger? 158 00:09:25,846 --> 00:09:28,266 He's going up. 159 00:09:28,266 --> 00:09:30,686 Where's he gone? Where is he? Are you coming, then? 160 00:09:30,686 --> 00:09:33,286 I'm coming, I'm coming. 161 00:09:33,286 --> 00:09:37,846 What I meant, Foggy, is, is there going to be any danger for him? 162 00:09:37,846 --> 00:09:39,846 Oh, for him. 163 00:09:39,846 --> 00:09:41,846 No, I shouldn't think so. 164 00:09:41,846 --> 00:09:43,486 Well, that's a relief. 165 00:09:43,486 --> 00:09:45,386 You can't wipe out his sort. 166 00:09:45,386 --> 00:09:49,726 One thing there's never a shortage of is unemployed scruffy little twollops. 167 00:09:49,726 --> 00:09:55,586 Bear in mind, however high he goes, I will be down here supervising all the safety precautions. 168 00:09:55,586 --> 00:09:58,186 How high do you think he'll go? 169 00:09:58,186 --> 00:10:02,246 Well, quite frankly, I think we'll be lucky if we can get him above 50 feet. 170 00:10:02,246 --> 00:10:05,206 50 feet! 171 00:10:05,206 --> 00:10:08,206 How lucky can you get? 172 00:10:08,206 --> 00:10:11,726 Come on, if you're coming. I'm coming, I'm coming. 173 00:10:27,166 --> 00:10:29,546 Where've you been? 174 00:10:29,546 --> 00:10:34,926 Listen, big mouth, this is not the easiest thing to take a leak in. 175 00:10:44,326 --> 00:10:49,026 Do you think I'll be all right? Of course you'll be all right, we've got you this helmet, haven't we? 176 00:10:49,026 --> 00:10:51,166 Built to British standards. 177 00:10:51,166 --> 00:10:53,846 Made to withstand enormous impacts. 178 00:10:56,166 --> 00:10:58,406 What enormous impacts? 179 00:10:58,406 --> 00:11:03,906 Well, it's a figure of speech to make you realise how safe you are inside that helmet. 180 00:11:03,906 --> 00:11:09,286 Ah, yes, but there's only a little bit of me inside that helmet. What about all the other bits? 181 00:11:09,286 --> 00:11:13,906 Exactly, whatever happens you've got to take every care to land on your head. 182 00:11:16,766 --> 00:11:19,886 Look, we're going to swing you a bit 183 00:11:19,886 --> 00:11:22,546 to you get used to the flying position. 184 00:11:22,546 --> 00:11:25,446 Now just spread your wings out, will you? 185 00:11:25,446 --> 00:11:28,106 HE LAUGHS 186 00:11:28,106 --> 00:11:31,566 The doodlebug is alive and well and living near Holmfirth. 187 00:11:46,326 --> 00:11:48,686 So, where are we off to now, then? 188 00:11:48,686 --> 00:11:52,566 Well, to find a suitable tree to swing you from 189 00:11:52,566 --> 00:11:56,786 so you can get accustomed to the feeling of flying. 190 00:11:56,786 --> 00:11:59,106 Somewhere where there's a bit more room. 191 00:11:59,106 --> 00:12:02,666 There wasn't really room enough in the barn to swing you properly. 192 00:12:02,666 --> 00:12:04,246 That was the trouble. 193 00:12:04,246 --> 00:12:08,466 The trouble was you don't know how to tie knots. Rubbish. 194 00:12:08,466 --> 00:12:12,906 That's what I said, you're supposed to type a reef knot and you've been tying rubbish. 195 00:12:12,906 --> 00:12:15,566 The Dewhurst knot is an unshakeable knot. 196 00:12:24,966 --> 00:12:27,206 (So the rabbit came out of the hole...) 197 00:13:19,806 --> 00:13:23,586 Right, I think I've got the hang of it now. You can let me down. 198 00:13:27,986 --> 00:13:30,966 I said, I've got the hang of it now. 199 00:13:30,966 --> 00:13:33,226 You lay on the back in the grass, 200 00:13:33,226 --> 00:13:35,826 you squint up into the sky, 201 00:13:35,826 --> 00:13:37,846 and it's full of mystery. 202 00:13:37,846 --> 00:13:42,986 And you can't help wondering if you got any creepy-crawlies in your hair. 203 00:13:42,986 --> 00:13:45,386 Creepy-crawlies? 204 00:13:45,386 --> 00:13:47,326 You don't get much in that line here. 205 00:13:47,326 --> 00:13:50,166 You have to go abroad to get the real monsters. 206 00:13:50,166 --> 00:13:52,866 I say, I'm ready for down now. 207 00:13:52,866 --> 00:13:55,966 I've seen spiders as big as Shetland ponies. 208 00:13:57,886 --> 00:14:02,286 If they trod on you, you'd be limping for a week, never mind the bite. 209 00:14:02,286 --> 00:14:03,786 They used to bite then? 210 00:14:03,786 --> 00:14:06,306 I thought from the size you're describing, 211 00:14:06,306 --> 00:14:08,546 maybe they used to crush you to death. 212 00:14:08,546 --> 00:14:11,466 My old woman can't stand spiders. 213 00:14:11,466 --> 00:14:15,466 And heavy drinkers. No, she can't stand heavy drinkers. 214 00:14:15,466 --> 00:14:17,566 The world's full of prejudice. 215 00:14:19,146 --> 00:14:21,966 Right, I've got the hang of it now. 216 00:14:21,966 --> 00:14:24,466 I'm ready for down. 217 00:14:24,466 --> 00:14:26,946 Was her father a heavy drinker? 218 00:14:26,946 --> 00:14:28,946 He used to play the accordion. 219 00:14:28,946 --> 00:14:31,746 There's no excuse for that. 220 00:14:31,746 --> 00:14:34,866 I once went down to inspect this sentry in the jungle 221 00:14:34,866 --> 00:14:37,186 and the spider had got him. 222 00:14:37,186 --> 00:14:39,626 Tha's never been near a jungle. 223 00:14:39,626 --> 00:14:41,546 I'm ready for down now. 224 00:14:41,546 --> 00:14:43,506 And underneath that this poor sentry... 225 00:14:43,506 --> 00:14:45,726 Never mind the rotten sentry! 226 00:14:45,726 --> 00:14:47,806 ..was this fragment of his paybook... 227 00:14:47,806 --> 00:14:53,686 Get me down! ..and one twisted round of 303 ammunition. 228 00:14:53,686 --> 00:14:54,766 Oh...! 229 00:14:54,766 --> 00:14:57,186 Get me down! 230 00:15:06,186 --> 00:15:08,746 Get me down! I'm not a flaming yo-yo. 231 00:15:08,746 --> 00:15:12,546 I want to be up there flying, not dangling about like this. 232 00:15:12,546 --> 00:15:18,026 You rotten lot. I know you're there. 233 00:15:18,026 --> 00:15:22,126 It's no use hiding. Or keeping quiet. 234 00:15:22,126 --> 00:15:24,286 It is me biggie. 235 00:15:24,286 --> 00:15:28,046 I am going to fly, I tell you. I am going to fly. I'm going to fly. 236 00:15:28,046 --> 00:15:29,026 I'm going to fly! 237 00:15:30,946 --> 00:15:33,526 And fly. And fly! 238 00:15:34,886 --> 00:15:37,186 What's the matter with you lot? 239 00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:40,386 Haven't you seen anybody flying before? 240 00:15:51,366 --> 00:15:55,306 Oh, I'm looking for a short fellah with a guilty expression. 241 00:15:55,306 --> 00:15:57,546 The one you married? That's him. 242 00:15:57,546 --> 00:16:00,926 He's not been in. I'll kill him when I find him. 243 00:16:00,926 --> 00:16:04,206 If you can find mine while you're at it, we'll make it a double event. 244 00:16:04,206 --> 00:16:06,546 Has your has gone as well? 245 00:16:06,546 --> 00:16:08,586 He got clean away when I was on the phone. 246 00:16:08,586 --> 00:16:10,826 Ooh, they're evil! 247 00:16:10,826 --> 00:16:12,726 Really low down evil. 248 00:16:12,726 --> 00:16:15,846 How come you let yours slip his leash? 249 00:16:15,846 --> 00:16:19,146 I've always thought of you as a model of advanced husband training. 250 00:16:19,146 --> 00:16:22,366 Well, he's usually more obedient. 251 00:16:22,366 --> 00:16:25,826 They gain your confidence, and then the next minute they've gone. 252 00:16:25,826 --> 00:16:29,186 You know where they've gone? They're heading for the hills. 253 00:16:29,186 --> 00:16:33,866 Oh no, he wouldn't leave me permanently, not my Wally. 254 00:16:33,866 --> 00:16:35,746 He's too dependent. 255 00:16:35,746 --> 00:16:37,646 Defenceless. 256 00:16:37,646 --> 00:16:39,806 Thick. 257 00:16:39,806 --> 00:16:42,086 I don't mean permanently. 258 00:16:42,086 --> 00:16:45,226 He knows a lifetime together means something. 259 00:16:45,226 --> 00:16:47,946 He knows it means I'd kill him. 260 00:16:47,946 --> 00:16:51,466 They'd gone to watch Compo Simmonite hang-gliding. 261 00:16:51,466 --> 00:16:53,126 Eh? Can you imagine? 262 00:16:53,126 --> 00:16:57,086 The birds will think the scarecrows have started coming up after them. 263 00:17:00,046 --> 00:17:02,126 Your Wally made him a kite thing. 264 00:17:02,126 --> 00:17:04,646 Well, the little swine. 265 00:17:04,646 --> 00:17:06,986 He's never got time to make me an ironing board. 266 00:17:06,986 --> 00:17:09,546 Well, it could be worse. 267 00:17:09,546 --> 00:17:11,646 At least they're not chasing after women. 268 00:17:11,646 --> 00:17:17,186 Oh no, he's never done that. He's not that way inclined, my Wally 269 00:17:17,186 --> 00:17:19,806 Oh, he has gained your confidence, hasn't he? 270 00:17:19,806 --> 00:17:22,746 He's never been wayward in terms of the flesh. 271 00:17:22,746 --> 00:17:24,326 Well, they don't have to be. 272 00:17:24,326 --> 00:17:27,906 I'm not suggesting your Wally is anything desperate in... 273 00:17:27,906 --> 00:17:32,086 Shall we say, close encounters of the most common kind. 274 00:17:32,086 --> 00:17:34,466 He's very well-balanced in that way. 275 00:17:34,466 --> 00:17:39,446 I've never found him excessively demanding. 276 00:17:39,446 --> 00:17:42,086 I can believe that. 277 00:17:42,086 --> 00:17:48,086 If you start as you mean to go on, you'll get no bother, I find. 278 00:17:48,086 --> 00:17:49,666 To tell you the truth, 279 00:17:49,666 --> 00:17:54,826 he could always be sidetracked with an inquiry regarding his pigeons. 280 00:17:54,826 --> 00:17:57,666 Yes, it's nice when they've got another hobby. 281 00:18:05,986 --> 00:18:10,006 Eh up! Make sure there's no lumps in it! 282 00:18:10,006 --> 00:18:12,126 There's no lumps in it. 283 00:18:12,126 --> 00:18:15,926 It will be like landing on a feather bed. 284 00:18:15,926 --> 00:18:21,266 Impressive, Foggy, how steady you are in the face of danger, to him. 285 00:18:21,266 --> 00:18:23,126 He's in no danger. 286 00:18:23,126 --> 00:18:25,106 It's a bit high up here. 287 00:18:25,106 --> 00:18:26,646 Oh, shut up. 288 00:18:26,646 --> 00:18:28,086 Eat your corn. 289 00:18:30,146 --> 00:18:32,886 I shall be looking after your safety every inch of the way. 290 00:18:34,566 --> 00:18:37,866 You think it's funny, don't you? Funny? 291 00:18:37,866 --> 00:18:39,426 Heavens, no. 292 00:18:41,026 --> 00:18:45,586 It will be a different tale when I've broken the Huddersfield altitude record. 293 00:18:45,586 --> 00:18:47,886 You'll not be laughing then. 294 00:18:47,886 --> 00:18:50,326 Have you really thought about this? 295 00:18:50,326 --> 00:18:55,726 Are you sure you want to go soaring up there, beyond the reach of social security? 296 00:18:55,726 --> 00:18:58,906 I'm going to fly, I tell you. 297 00:18:58,906 --> 00:19:01,066 I'm going to fly. 298 00:19:01,066 --> 00:19:02,946 Way up, kid! 299 00:19:02,946 --> 00:19:06,726 Way up into the wild blue yon... Ooh! 300 00:19:14,526 --> 00:19:18,826 Just sit on your perch a minute until I give you the signal. 301 00:19:18,826 --> 00:19:22,686 Crack a nut in your beak or something. 302 00:19:22,686 --> 00:19:28,226 Just try to remember that this is not a flight, it's just a jump from a barn roof. 303 00:19:28,226 --> 00:19:33,686 Listen, why don't we have a wander round and see if we can find a smaller barn? 304 00:19:33,686 --> 00:19:36,446 What he wants is a biggish dog kennel. 305 00:19:36,446 --> 00:19:39,266 Who do we know with a biggish dog kennel? 306 00:19:39,266 --> 00:19:42,126 You're not going to chicken out now, are you? 307 00:19:42,126 --> 00:19:45,286 Well, he's all dressed for it. 308 00:19:45,286 --> 00:19:48,306 I want to be a flyer, not a rotten jumper. 309 00:19:48,306 --> 00:19:51,766 But you've got to have the proper training. 310 00:19:51,766 --> 00:19:55,466 You don't think the Wright Brothers went up in the air straightaway, do you? 311 00:19:55,466 --> 00:19:58,346 They were jumping off barns all over America. 312 00:19:58,346 --> 00:20:01,546 They were? Certainly. 313 00:20:01,546 --> 00:20:03,206 People thought they were crazy. 314 00:20:03,206 --> 00:20:06,406 You know, thud, grunt, "Hello, it's the Wright Brothers." 315 00:20:06,406 --> 00:20:08,306 But it paid off in the end, didn't it? 316 00:20:08,306 --> 00:20:13,006 They had the most famous broken legs in America. 317 00:20:13,006 --> 00:20:14,666 Don't spoil it. 318 00:20:14,666 --> 00:20:16,706 I'm trying to psych him up to it. 319 00:20:16,706 --> 00:20:20,226 I never knew the Wright Brothers jumped off barns. 320 00:20:20,226 --> 00:20:22,366 What do you think he needs at the moment - 321 00:20:22,366 --> 00:20:25,866 the truth, or a bit of exaggeration to cheer him up? 322 00:20:25,866 --> 00:20:28,686 I think he needs the Wright Brothers. 323 00:20:28,686 --> 00:20:30,166 Right, I'll do it. 324 00:20:30,166 --> 00:20:33,426 I'm all cycled up. I'm ready then. 325 00:20:33,426 --> 00:20:35,826 That's my boy. 326 00:20:35,826 --> 00:20:37,286 Looking good. 327 00:20:39,506 --> 00:20:42,166 I'm feeling wa-hey! 328 00:20:42,166 --> 00:20:43,946 Well, stand clear, then! 329 00:20:43,946 --> 00:20:46,086 All clear. 330 00:20:46,086 --> 00:20:51,446 Now, when I shout "geronimo", you'll know I'm on me way. What's he say? 331 00:20:51,446 --> 00:20:55,486 He said it when he shouts "geranium", you'll know he's on his way. 332 00:20:55,486 --> 00:20:59,206 Geronimo. Sorry. 333 00:20:59,206 --> 00:21:01,906 Well, just get on with it. What's it matter what you shout? 334 00:21:01,906 --> 00:21:03,906 Are you joking? 335 00:21:03,906 --> 00:21:07,206 I'm going to look a right jessie shouting "geranium". 336 00:21:20,626 --> 00:21:22,406 Geronimo! 337 00:21:35,126 --> 00:21:36,846 You'll have to come up and get me. 338 00:21:45,006 --> 00:21:46,506 Well, there you are, you see. 339 00:21:46,506 --> 00:21:49,526 Nothing left to chance. Sid and Wally standing by in the rescue boat. 340 00:21:49,526 --> 00:21:52,866 And a right dozy pair in a boat, they are. 341 00:21:52,866 --> 00:21:57,526 Better than nothing. And you'll be attached to me by this lifeline. 342 00:21:57,526 --> 00:21:59,826 Have you tied a proper knot this time? 343 00:21:59,826 --> 00:22:01,866 Of course I've tied a proper knot. 344 00:22:01,866 --> 00:22:04,646 You'll be anchored to me at all times. 345 00:22:04,646 --> 00:22:07,266 I'll pull you down if you look like you're going too high. 346 00:22:07,266 --> 00:22:09,286 Is it all over? Can I open my eyes now? 347 00:22:10,866 --> 00:22:13,766 He hasn't started yet. Oh God. 348 00:22:13,766 --> 00:22:16,706 We're waiting for a ready signal from the boat. 349 00:22:16,706 --> 00:22:18,866 Go on then, somebody, give them a wave. 350 00:22:18,866 --> 00:22:22,126 I'm not letting go of this boat. 351 00:22:22,126 --> 00:22:23,926 Somebody's got to give them a wave. 352 00:22:26,726 --> 00:22:29,006 Don't start waving, you're going to have us over. 353 00:22:29,006 --> 00:22:32,106 If we're not going to wave, maybe one of us can give them a shout. 354 00:22:33,746 --> 00:22:37,686 Shout steady, then. 355 00:22:37,686 --> 00:22:39,646 Ready in the boat! 356 00:22:40,706 --> 00:22:42,606 Ready in the boat! 357 00:22:42,606 --> 00:22:44,906 They MUST be ready in the boat. 358 00:22:44,906 --> 00:22:47,466 Now, remember the Wright Brothers. 359 00:22:47,466 --> 00:22:49,966 Coincidentally, they're both dead. 360 00:22:49,966 --> 00:22:54,006 He'll be all right. It's not as though he's married. Who's going to miss him? 361 00:22:54,006 --> 00:22:55,986 Sid and Wally for a start. 362 00:22:55,986 --> 00:22:58,166 Are me trousers fast? 363 00:22:58,166 --> 00:23:00,106 Oh, stop worrying. 364 00:23:00,106 --> 00:23:02,446 I've seen to everything personally. 365 00:23:02,446 --> 00:23:07,946 I hope they're not too fast, it's going to be embarrassing if they get back here before he does. 366 00:23:07,946 --> 00:23:09,586 What are they doing now? 367 00:23:09,586 --> 00:23:11,326 I don't know. 368 00:23:11,326 --> 00:23:14,526 It looks as though somebody's just started his motor. 369 00:23:16,406 --> 00:23:18,406 Here, sit still. 370 00:23:18,406 --> 00:23:20,046 I am sitting still. 371 00:23:20,046 --> 00:23:22,886 Well, sit still stiller. 372 00:23:25,146 --> 00:23:26,766 Steady! 373 00:23:28,306 --> 00:23:29,486 Go! 374 00:23:47,506 --> 00:23:48,806 Oh no! 375 00:24:03,446 --> 00:24:04,946 Are you ready? 376 00:24:04,946 --> 00:24:06,486 Steady? 377 00:24:06,486 --> 00:24:08,546 Go! 378 00:24:21,806 --> 00:24:22,886 Not too fast! 379 00:24:31,666 --> 00:24:34,086 Well done! 380 00:25:03,266 --> 00:25:06,026 Just look at that, they've gone home. 381 00:25:06,026 --> 00:25:08,306 Charming. We could have been drowned. 382 00:25:08,306 --> 00:25:09,846 We are drowned. 383 00:25:09,846 --> 00:25:12,266 What am I going to tell my old lass? 384 00:25:12,266 --> 00:25:15,426 There's nobody who can tell your lass anything. 385 00:25:15,426 --> 00:25:20,546 Give her her due, she was very gentle with me on my wedding night. 386 00:25:22,026 --> 00:25:24,286 I bet they're in the pub already, having a pint. 387 00:25:24,286 --> 00:25:29,346 All right, so they weren't going to stop and rescue us, but they could have at least waved us goodbye. 388 00:25:31,126 --> 00:25:33,726 I don't like this way. 389 00:25:33,726 --> 00:25:38,166 Well, you'll be all right. This time you'll have enough forward speed. 390 00:25:40,486 --> 00:25:44,546 Drive to that wall as fast as you can. 391 00:25:44,546 --> 00:25:48,126 When it brakes, you will continue straight on over the wall. 392 00:25:49,946 --> 00:25:55,506 Geranium! Geronimo. Sorry. 393 00:25:55,506 --> 00:25:57,586 Come on, let's get on with it. 394 00:25:57,586 --> 00:25:59,126 Go, go, go. 395 00:25:59,126 --> 00:26:01,126 IGNITION GRINDS 396 00:26:18,626 --> 00:26:20,726 Oh, you're looking fine. 397 00:26:45,826 --> 00:26:48,446 You flaming lunatic! 398 00:26:48,446 --> 00:26:51,666 What are you two doing walking on the runway?! 399 00:26:51,666 --> 00:26:54,586 Get your wing out of my ribs! 400 00:26:54,586 --> 00:26:57,186 Just get your wing out of my ribs! 401 00:26:57,186 --> 00:26:59,366 At least his trousers stayed up this time. 402 00:26:59,366 --> 00:27:02,186 That's the first time I've ever seen him from underneath. 403 00:27:02,186 --> 00:27:05,586 It's not natural. From that angle, it could be anybody. 404 00:27:05,586 --> 00:27:07,166 Even a southerner. 405 00:27:11,006 --> 00:27:14,066 You rotten lot. You knew it wouldn't work. 406 00:27:14,066 --> 00:27:16,346 It took the Wright Brothers years. 407 00:27:16,346 --> 00:27:18,986 Now, listen, I've got an idea... 408 00:27:18,986 --> 00:27:20,926 Hmph! 409 00:28:01,606 --> 00:28:05,506 Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd 410 00:28:05,556 --> 00:28:10,106 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32425

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