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1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,340
[Theme music]
2
00:00:11,052 --> 00:00:17,482
(Singing) Love,
exciting and new.
3
00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:19,059
Come aboard.
4
00:00:22,772 --> 00:00:26,152
We're expecting you.
5
00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:34,494
And love, life's
sweetest reward.
6
00:00:34,576 --> 00:00:35,536
Let it flow.
7
00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:40,374
It floats back to you.
8
00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:50,930
Love boat, soon we'll
be making another run.
9
00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:58,769
The love boat promises
something for everyone.
10
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:03,400
Set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance.
11
00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:13,987
And love won't hurt anymore.
12
00:01:14,073 --> 00:01:22,463
It's an open smile
on a friendly shore.
13
00:01:22,540 --> 00:01:24,210
It's love.
14
00:01:27,837 --> 00:01:28,337
Welcome aboard.
15
00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:30,171
It's love.
16
00:02:24,602 --> 00:02:26,232
Hello.
17
00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:27,402
Welcome aboard.
18
00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,900
Yes, you go through the
lobby and up the stairs.
19
00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:32,824
Hello.
20
00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:33,572
Hi.
21
00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:34,903
Welcome aboard.
22
00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,818
Hello.
23
00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:39,367
I'm Brian Mallory.
24
00:02:39,450 --> 00:02:41,080
Oh, welcome
aboard, Mr. Mallory.
25
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,371
It's a pleasure to have such a
distinguished writer with us.
26
00:02:43,454 --> 00:02:44,914
We have a lot of your
books in the library.
27
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,128
Yes, I should think so.
28
00:02:47,208 --> 00:02:49,748
You certainly picked
the right cruise.
29
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:52,916
Two weeks, the Panama
canal, the exotic Caribbean.
30
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:54,716
I read the brochure.
31
00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:56,429
And this is my wife, Janet.
32
00:02:56,509 --> 00:02:57,509
Captain stubing: How do you do?
33
00:02:57,594 --> 00:02:58,514
I'm captain stubing.
34
00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,385
This is yeoman purser
Smith, Dr. Bricker.
35
00:03:00,471 --> 00:03:01,431
Pleasure.
36
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:02,684
If there's anything you need--
37
00:03:02,765 --> 00:03:05,435
all arrivals board through
this entrance, don't they?
38
00:03:05,518 --> 00:03:06,228
That's right.
39
00:03:06,311 --> 00:03:06,351
You expecting someone--
40
00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:14,400
Pretty lady.
41
00:03:14,485 --> 00:03:17,445
He's a strange bird.
42
00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:18,240
Loved her.
43
00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:19,033
Hated him.
44
00:03:20,658 --> 00:03:22,948
Oh my gosh.
45
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,156
I don't believe it.
46
00:03:24,245 --> 00:03:24,825
Julie.
47
00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:25,833
Hey, Julie is that you?
48
00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:28,634
Roger, Roger markham.
49
00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:30,628
Hello.
50
00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:31,960
How are you?
51
00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:35,415
Oh, this is my fiance,
maude Victor, Julie McCoy.
52
00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:36,166
Pleasure to meet you.
53
00:03:36,257 --> 00:03:37,427
How do you do?
54
00:03:37,508 --> 00:03:38,678
We went to college together.
55
00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:39,640
Oh.
56
00:03:39,719 --> 00:03:41,179
I had no idea you worked here.
57
00:03:41,262 --> 00:03:42,812
How long have you
been doing this?
58
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,849
Hey, look, did you see
anybody from the old gang?
59
00:03:44,933 --> 00:03:45,683
Roger, Roger, I would
love to talk with you,
60
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:49,147
but I'm kind of busy.
61
00:03:49,228 --> 00:03:50,768
I'd love to get
together with you later.
62
00:03:50,855 --> 00:03:51,895
I bet you would.
63
00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:57,491
Hi.
64
00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:58,400
How are you?
65
00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:01,568
Can you tell me
where the [inaudible]??
66
00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:02,578
Mr. Peter Andrews.
67
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,869
Oh, that's a pretty
girl he's traveling with.
68
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:10,166
He's traveling alone, Janet.
69
00:04:10,249 --> 00:04:13,799
Do try to curb your
schoolgirl imagination.
70
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:24,506
Hi.
71
00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:25,517
Hello.
72
00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:26,518
I'm marcia rand.
- Oh, well, hello.
73
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:27,639
Yes.
74
00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:28,685
You're on the promenade
deck, cabin 343.
75
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:30,518
Thanks.
76
00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,903
This the Dave
Porter, same address.
77
00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:34,271
Well, hello.
78
00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:36,187
I'm Julie McCoy,
your cruise director.
79
00:04:36,275 --> 00:04:37,185
Hi.
80
00:04:37,276 --> 00:04:38,696
I won these in some
sort of a contest.
81
00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:41,488
Really?
82
00:04:41,572 --> 00:04:43,162
Is there a place to
work out on the ship?
83
00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:43,871
Yeah.
84
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:44,990
Oh, come on.
85
00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:46,786
You're not gonna
have time for that.
86
00:04:46,869 --> 00:04:51,209
You just knock on the cabin
when the two weeks are over.
87
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:56,800
Oh, there's marcia rand,
present with whomever.
88
00:04:56,879 --> 00:05:00,839
He's unimportant.
89
00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:02,215
Mr. Marvin Jones.
90
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:07,893
Our group is now complete.
91
00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:10,944
And we'll be at sea before they
learn that their free cruise
92
00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:14,479
does have a price.
93
00:05:14,564 --> 00:05:15,904
Hello, merrill.
94
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,902
Charlie, I didn't
expect to see
95
00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:19,284
you back vacationing so soon.
96
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,400
Well, it's not
exactly a vacation.
97
00:05:21,487 --> 00:05:24,027
I have a sales meeting in
Puerto Rico to get ready for,
98
00:05:24,115 --> 00:05:26,985
plus an important mission to
accomplish while I'm on board.
99
00:05:27,076 --> 00:05:28,366
- Well, it sounds intriguing.
- Sir.
100
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:29,123
Yes?
101
00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:30,583
Time to boogie.
102
00:05:30,663 --> 00:05:31,663
Duty calls.
103
00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:33,208
We'll talk later.
104
00:05:33,291 --> 00:05:36,461
Oh, gopher, try to find out
what is important mission is
105
00:05:36,544 --> 00:05:37,924
and see if she has a friend.
106
00:05:41,549 --> 00:05:41,879
He's is quite a man.
107
00:05:41,966 --> 00:05:43,586
The best.
108
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:45,296
Couldn't get along without him.
109
00:05:45,386 --> 00:05:46,756
You may have to.
110
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:49,216
If I have my way, this
Caribbean cruise will be
111
00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:51,057
captain stubing's last voyage.
112
00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:45,857
Sent for me, Mr. Mallory?
113
00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:47,487
Two things.
114
00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:51,243
In the future, would you
please instruct the bartender
115
00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:55,327
to use freshly ground nutmeg
when I order a ramos fizz?
116
00:06:55,414 --> 00:06:56,964
And secondly, would
you be so kind
117
00:06:57,041 --> 00:06:59,501
as to deliver one box to each
of the persons on that list?
118
00:06:59,585 --> 00:07:02,665
I'll see you in my cabin
when you're through.
119
00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:03,795
Which goes to who?
120
00:07:03,881 --> 00:07:07,681
To whom does each go?
121
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:08,390
But no matter.
122
00:07:08,469 --> 00:07:10,679
They're identical.
123
00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:13,983
And remember, not a word
as to from whom they came.
124
00:07:14,058 --> 00:07:15,018
Yes, sir.
125
00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:18,311
Remember, freshly
ground nutmeg.
126
00:07:32,076 --> 00:07:33,996
You have any papaya
juice or protein powder.
127
00:07:34,078 --> 00:07:35,288
Afraid not.
128
00:07:35,371 --> 00:07:36,911
Close as I could come
is grapefruit juice
129
00:07:36,998 --> 00:07:37,788
in a dirty glass.
130
00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:45,209
Give me a glass of milk, skim.
131
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:51,720
Lemme guess, struggling
young medical student?
132
00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:53,434
Yeah, close.
133
00:07:53,514 --> 00:07:55,894
Struggling previously
young lawyer.
134
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:58,135
Oh, then, why
the medical books?
135
00:07:58,227 --> 00:08:00,227
I'm donating a kidney
to my brother next month
136
00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,943
and I was kind of reading
up on this procedure.
137
00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:02,903
Hey.
138
00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:03,232
That's really something.
139
00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:04,396
Yeah.
140
00:08:04,483 --> 00:08:05,903
Sure sounds saintly, doesn't it?
141
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:07,775
But I got to admit, at times, I
get kind of chicken, you know?
142
00:08:07,862 --> 00:08:11,452
The closer it gets, the more I
get attached to little George
143
00:08:11,532 --> 00:08:12,662
here.
144
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:16,082
You're actually going to
give away part of your body?
145
00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:18,162
Well, I'll still
have the back up.
146
00:08:18,247 --> 00:08:21,287
But won't that leave a scar?
147
00:08:21,375 --> 00:08:24,745
I guess so, unless
they put in a zipper.
148
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:27,507
He's going to be
scarred for life.
149
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:30,590
How's he's gonna look when
he wears a bathing suit?
150
00:08:30,676 --> 00:08:31,426
Beautiful.
151
00:08:34,805 --> 00:08:35,055
Oh, hey, Mr. Andrews.
152
00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,519
Yeah?
153
00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:38,099
I got something for you.
154
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:38,984
Who is this from?
155
00:08:39,060 --> 00:08:40,020
I can't say.
156
00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:41,022
Yeah?
157
00:08:41,103 --> 00:08:43,153
Hm.
158
00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:43,981
Gopher: Wow.
159
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:49,574
What's this?
160
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:53,954
Your cruise ticket and
this coin are my gifts.
161
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:55,663
An even more generous
prize awaits.
162
00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:58,703
Come alone to the terrace
room, midnight tonight.
163
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,172
That's weird.
164
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:03,920
I think it's kind of neat.
165
00:09:04,001 --> 00:09:05,591
Thanks.
166
00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:05,710
Intriguing.
167
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:12,677
Hey, you.
168
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:13,800
What was in that
box you gave him?
169
00:09:13,886 --> 00:09:15,006
Was it pills?
170
00:09:15,096 --> 00:09:16,426
Well, ma'am, that's
personal business.
171
00:09:16,514 --> 00:09:17,274
I mean, if it doesn't
directly concern you,
172
00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:19,228
I don't see everything--
173
00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:20,938
everything about
that man concerns me.
174
00:09:21,018 --> 00:09:23,648
Now, I want you to report
to me on everything he does,
175
00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:24,689
everything.
176
00:09:24,772 --> 00:09:26,232
Well, you don't have
to give me money, ma'am.
177
00:09:26,315 --> 00:09:28,815
Money is no object.
178
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:33,991
$1.27, I can see that.
179
00:09:34,073 --> 00:09:34,953
I'll do what I can.
180
00:09:35,032 --> 00:09:35,742
Thank you.
181
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,091
Watch it.
182
00:09:46,168 --> 00:09:48,088
You're standing in my sun.
183
00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:50,670
Oh, it's you.
184
00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:52,836
Hey, you big old hunk.
185
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:55,755
What do you say you
and I go downstairs
186
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:58,885
in our little old cabin
and change for dinner?
187
00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:00,773
But dinner isn't for
another three hours.
188
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:03,480
Oh, why must we wait for the
last minute for these things.
189
00:10:09,942 --> 00:10:11,152
Oh, Ms. Rand, i'm
glad I found you.
190
00:10:11,235 --> 00:10:12,025
I have something for you.
191
00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:13,781
For me?
192
00:10:13,863 --> 00:10:15,913
Mhm.
193
00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:16,700
Look at this.
194
00:10:16,782 --> 00:10:19,042
It's a coin.
195
00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:20,368
I think this is sold gold.
196
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:21,373
It is.
197
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:22,334
Hey, what do you
mean giving my girl--
198
00:10:22,413 --> 00:10:23,333
hey, look, don't look at me.
199
00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:25,634
I'm not even into bronze.
200
00:10:28,961 --> 00:10:30,671
It's from whoever gave
us the cruise tickets.
201
00:10:30,755 --> 00:10:33,005
And it says he's gonna--
202
00:10:33,090 --> 00:10:34,090
there's a meeting tonight.
203
00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:37,845
Upper lounge, midnight.
204
00:10:37,928 --> 00:10:40,468
So this whole trip is
just to meet another guy?
205
00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:41,216
No.
206
00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:41,847
No.
207
00:10:41,932 --> 00:10:43,932
It's nothing like that.
208
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,228
Come on, tiger.
209
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:48,021
What do you say you and I go
down to our little old cabin?
210
00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:50,975
Well, why don't you go down to
your little old cabin with him?
211
00:10:55,446 --> 00:10:57,276
Mr. Jones, sir.
212
00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:58,315
This is for you.
213
00:10:58,407 --> 00:10:59,407
Oh, thank you very much.
214
00:10:59,492 --> 00:10:59,992
Not at all.
215
00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:02,746
Thank you very much.
216
00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:03,618
Oh, boy.
217
00:11:03,704 --> 00:11:04,964
This is lovely.
218
00:11:05,039 --> 00:11:06,499
There's a-- there's a note.
219
00:11:06,582 --> 00:11:07,542
Oh.
220
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:08,825
Yeah.
221
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:10,288
So that's it?
222
00:11:10,378 --> 00:11:12,918
I didn't win this trip.
223
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:14,125
It's a gift.
224
00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:16,795
Obviously from an admirer,
some wealthy woman.
225
00:11:16,884 --> 00:11:17,764
Well, not quite--
226
00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:18,933
probably somebody
at the bookstore where
227
00:11:19,011 --> 00:11:21,811
I work and admired me
from afar and arranged
228
00:11:21,889 --> 00:11:25,179
for this rendezvous,
lusting for my body.
229
00:11:25,267 --> 00:11:26,477
Right.
230
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:30,190
But my heart will not be
a bird in a gilded cage.
231
00:11:30,272 --> 00:11:32,732
I won't sell my heart
for a rich woman's gold.
232
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,409
Off to the Caribbean
on a banana boat.
233
00:11:55,714 --> 00:11:58,014
You know, Charlie, you
really are something.
234
00:11:58,092 --> 00:12:00,392
You haven't stopped working
since you came on board.
235
00:12:00,469 --> 00:12:04,099
Yeah, well that's the price of
running a successful business.
236
00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:06,771
How do you get any
time to enjoy it?
237
00:12:06,851 --> 00:12:10,401
You know, Charlie, you
got a big organization.
238
00:12:10,479 --> 00:12:12,479
Why don't you get someone
to help you with the load?
239
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,685
It's not that simple.
240
00:12:14,775 --> 00:12:19,155
The kind of man I need is
very difficult to find.
241
00:12:19,238 --> 00:12:23,198
And then, if I find him,
how do I interest him?
242
00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:24,994
Just give him what he wants.
243
00:12:25,077 --> 00:12:26,697
All right.
244
00:12:26,787 --> 00:12:28,657
What do you want?
245
00:12:28,747 --> 00:12:30,327
Me?
246
00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:32,666
You're kidding, Charlie.
247
00:12:32,751 --> 00:12:33,591
Look, I'm a sailor.
248
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:35,049
I don't know anything
about business.
249
00:12:35,129 --> 00:12:37,839
I can teach you everything
there is to know in six months.
250
00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:39,093
Grab it, merrill.
251
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,585
Why, it's a good management
job with an unlimited future.
252
00:12:41,677 --> 00:12:43,007
You're wasting yourself here.
253
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:43,465
No.
254
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:45,264
Not a waste.
255
00:12:45,347 --> 00:12:45,717
I like it.
256
00:12:45,806 --> 00:12:47,346
It is a waste.
257
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,313
I mean, worrying about
who's sitting at what table,
258
00:12:49,393 --> 00:12:51,103
whether Mrs. Smith's
mattresses is lumpy or not.
259
00:12:51,187 --> 00:12:52,017
Come on.
260
00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:53,274
That's beneath you.
261
00:12:53,355 --> 00:12:56,025
Captain, Dr. Bricker's
waiting for us in your office.
262
00:12:56,108 --> 00:12:56,688
Oh, thank you.
263
00:12:56,775 --> 00:12:57,985
Look, I'm sorry, Charlie.
264
00:12:58,068 --> 00:12:59,318
I got a staff meeting.
265
00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:00,533
I know what your salary is.
266
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:03,743
I'll triple your pay.
267
00:13:03,824 --> 00:13:04,874
You're joking.
268
00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:06,290
Plus stock options.
269
00:13:06,368 --> 00:13:07,368
Come on.
270
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:08,873
In five years, you
and Vicki will be
271
00:13:08,954 --> 00:13:10,044
set for the rest of your lives.
272
00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:14,882
Think it over.
273
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:16,210
New York is an exciting city.
274
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:17,085
You and Vicki'll love it.
275
00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:19,881
Here.
276
00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:22,715
You look over our annual report.
277
00:13:22,801 --> 00:13:24,551
I think you'll find
it very interesting.
278
00:13:34,104 --> 00:13:36,154
Charlie comes on pretty
strong, doesn't he?
279
00:13:36,232 --> 00:13:37,112
Yeah.
280
00:13:37,191 --> 00:13:38,401
Sounds tempting.
281
00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:41,364
Are you considering it?
282
00:13:41,445 --> 00:13:42,235
No.
283
00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:43,951
I don't think so, Isaac.
284
00:13:44,031 --> 00:13:45,491
Then, would you put
in a good word for me?
285
00:13:49,119 --> 00:13:50,539
After we go through
the Panama canal,
286
00:13:50,621 --> 00:13:52,081
our first island is Aruba.
287
00:13:52,164 --> 00:13:54,254
It's Dutch, has fantastic
beaches and casinos.
288
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:55,963
That's great.
289
00:13:56,043 --> 00:13:57,093
On palm beach.
290
00:13:57,169 --> 00:13:58,549
See--
291
00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:00,589
well, well, well, you two
certainly spend a lot of time
292
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:01,673
together, don't you?
293
00:14:01,757 --> 00:14:03,587
Oh, we've only been
here a couple of minutes.
294
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,136
Yes, but you were waiting to
greet him when we got on board.
295
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:06,929
Waiting?
296
00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:08,432
I didn't even know
he was coming.
297
00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:09,644
Yeah, besides, that's her job.
298
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:10,393
She's a greeter.
299
00:14:10,474 --> 00:14:11,394
She greets everyone.
300
00:14:11,475 --> 00:14:14,395
Oh, but not the way
she greeted you, Roger.
301
00:14:14,478 --> 00:14:19,278
I saw the way you looked at
his, yearning, burning, longing.
302
00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:20,728
Roger: What yearning, burning?
303
00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,778
It was just a handshake.
304
00:14:22,861 --> 00:14:23,951
To you perhaps, Roger.
305
00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,699
But-- but a woman
can see these things
306
00:14:25,781 --> 00:14:27,451
for what they really are.
- Maude.
307
00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:28,833
You know, obviously,
she was waiting
308
00:14:28,909 --> 00:14:31,619
to renew the torrid romance
that you tow shared in college.
309
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:34,464
Honey, I think this is
just your imagination.
310
00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,210
Julie's not interested in me.
311
00:14:36,292 --> 00:14:36,792
Oh, really?
312
00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:39,955
Not in the slightest.
313
00:14:40,045 --> 00:14:41,835
If I hadn't shown
up now, Ms. McCoy,
314
00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:43,842
how long would it have
taken you before you
315
00:14:43,924 --> 00:14:45,514
invited Roger to your cabin?
316
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:46,803
About 100 years.
317
00:14:46,885 --> 00:14:47,595
I'll bet.
318
00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:48,388
Maude.
319
00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:49,310
Roger.
320
00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:51,808
Look it, Ms. McCoy,
this man is mine.
321
00:14:51,890 --> 00:14:53,930
So if you will please
stay away from--
322
00:14:54,018 --> 00:14:54,728
Roger: Maude.
323
00:14:54,810 --> 00:14:55,640
Roger, let's go.
324
00:15:01,275 --> 00:15:02,475
Ok, Isaac.
325
00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:04,148
We'll pick up a new
supply of rum in San Juan.
326
00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:05,896
That should last til we
get back to Los Angeles.
327
00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:06,238
No problem, sir.
328
00:15:06,322 --> 00:15:08,122
Next?
329
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:09,988
And about the
antibiotics, if we run out,
330
00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:11,445
we can pick up some
on one of the islands.
331
00:15:11,535 --> 00:15:12,235
Good.
332
00:15:16,332 --> 00:15:18,002
Captain.
333
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:18,793
Captain.
334
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:20,836
Captain.
335
00:15:20,919 --> 00:15:21,999
Captain, sir, i'd--
336
00:15:22,087 --> 00:15:24,507
I'd like to make a complaint
about your Ms. McCoy.
337
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,180
Captain stubing: Well, what
seems to be the problem?
338
00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:29,178
Well, she's trying to steal
my fiancee away from me.
339
00:15:29,261 --> 00:15:31,721
She's a-- a vamp.
340
00:15:31,805 --> 00:15:34,515
She was pawing and clawing
him right in the lobby.
341
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:36,690
Sir, she must be disciplined.
342
00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:40,729
Oh, very serious,
especially at sea.
343
00:15:40,814 --> 00:15:45,364
I think the minimum sentence
for vamping is flogging.
344
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:50,574
I forget, captain, does that
call for 10 or 20 lashes?
345
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,198
Lashes?
346
00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:53,164
Oh, no, no, no, no.
347
00:15:53,243 --> 00:15:55,203
That's not exactly
what I had in mind.
348
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:56,407
Well, that's
very decent of you.
349
00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:59,037
But girls like that
must be taught a lesson.
350
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:00,834
Yes, but
nonetheless, captain, I
351
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:03,498
think that a stern
reprimand would be enough.
352
00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:04,707
I'll have a word
with Ms. McCoy.
353
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:05,457
Ok.
354
00:16:05,547 --> 00:16:06,717
Thank you, captain.
You too.
355
00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:07,509
Thank you.
356
00:16:07,591 --> 00:16:08,131
[Inaudible]
357
00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:16,732
Vamping?
358
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:19,229
That's the craziest
thing I ever.
359
00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:20,901
I mean, Julie would
never try to steal a man,
360
00:16:20,979 --> 00:16:27,029
much less climb all over
and claw and paw him.
361
00:16:27,111 --> 00:16:27,901
Would she?
362
00:16:27,986 --> 00:16:28,736
No.
363
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:29,571
But it's not hopeless.
364
00:16:29,655 --> 00:16:30,985
She's still young
enough to learn.
365
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:43,711
Brian, what are you up to?
366
00:16:43,794 --> 00:16:45,674
Why all the mystery?
367
00:16:45,754 --> 00:16:48,224
Years ago, as my secretary,
you had the good sense
368
00:16:48,298 --> 00:16:49,588
not to question me.
369
00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:52,215
May I suggest you continue
this admirable quality?
370
00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:58,097
[Knocking]
371
00:17:05,190 --> 00:17:06,610
Hello.
372
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:08,442
Boxes are all
delivered, Mr. Mallory.
373
00:17:08,527 --> 00:17:11,107
Except for this one
to Mr. Burl Smith.
374
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:11,816
Right.
375
00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:13,445
Burl Smith.
376
00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:15,492
That's me.
377
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:16,736
Precisely.
378
00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:28,052
Why me?
379
00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:49,989
Well, have any idea what
this mysterious meeting
380
00:17:50,068 --> 00:17:50,688
is all about?
- No.
381
00:17:50,778 --> 00:17:52,698
I guess we're in the same boat--
382
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:53,490
ship.
383
00:17:53,572 --> 00:17:54,282
Whatever.
384
00:17:58,285 --> 00:17:59,405
She sent for you too?
385
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:01,365
And me.
386
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:03,535
She wants three guys?
387
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:04,714
She didn't send for you.
388
00:18:04,792 --> 00:18:05,502
He did.
389
00:18:05,584 --> 00:18:08,134
A he?
390
00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:11,422
Well, give Romeo back his gold.
391
00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:13,337
That broad-minded I ain't.
392
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:14,005
Marvin, sit down.
393
00:18:14,092 --> 00:18:15,432
It's not like that at all.
394
00:18:20,390 --> 00:18:22,020
Wow.
395
00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:23,810
All of you too, huh?
396
00:18:23,894 --> 00:18:25,314
Well, I hope this meeting
works, because this
397
00:18:25,395 --> 00:18:30,145
is getting me a divorce fellas
and I'm not ever married.
398
00:18:30,234 --> 00:18:32,114
Brian: Good evening.
399
00:18:32,194 --> 00:18:33,364
I'm Brian Mallory.
400
00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:34,065
The author?
401
00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:35,074
Brian: The same.
402
00:18:35,155 --> 00:18:36,445
This is my wife Janet.
403
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:36,912
Do you write too?
404
00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:37,700
Well, once i--
405
00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,333
another time, Janet.
406
00:18:43,330 --> 00:18:46,540
Now, I shall be brief.
407
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:48,165
I need your help
in an urgent quest
408
00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:51,512
for a missing man, my
nephew and only living
409
00:18:51,588 --> 00:18:54,468
relative, Mr. Thomas Mallory.
410
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:58,720
But you ask why would I
want you to find my nephew?
411
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:00,604
Well, it's quite simple really.
412
00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:02,351
I wouldn't recognize him.
413
00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:05,192
I haven't seen the boy
since he was an infant.
414
00:19:05,269 --> 00:19:06,139
But all of you have.
415
00:19:11,358 --> 00:19:14,398
Ah, so you're beginning
to understand.
416
00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:16,026
Tom Mallory.
417
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:16,743
Oh, yeah.
418
00:19:16,822 --> 00:19:18,032
I remember him.
419
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:19,195
He used to come to my
bookstore all the time,
420
00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:22,333
aisles 12, comparative religion.
421
00:19:22,411 --> 00:19:23,081
Yeah.
422
00:19:23,161 --> 00:19:24,501
I don't think I've ever met--
423
00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:26,670
you helped him settle
an insurance claim.
424
00:19:26,748 --> 00:19:28,458
Tom Mallory.
425
00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:33,208
Oh, I did help him
settle that claim.
426
00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:35,757
He smashed up his ankle
real bad in an accident.
427
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:38,301
Tom Mallory, wait.
428
00:19:38,385 --> 00:19:40,755
He lived in the same
apartment building I live in.
429
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:41,466
I used to meet him
in the laundry room.
430
00:19:41,555 --> 00:19:43,345
No.
431
00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:45,182
He moved out a few
months ago though.
432
00:19:45,267 --> 00:19:47,727
Six months ago to be exact.
433
00:19:47,811 --> 00:19:50,111
As a matter of fact, he
left to go on a cruise
434
00:19:50,188 --> 00:19:51,438
aboard this very ship.
435
00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:53,283
And I played chess with him.
436
00:19:53,358 --> 00:19:55,318
He was limping on
that bad ankle.
437
00:19:55,402 --> 00:19:57,322
Seemed to enjoy the cruise.
438
00:19:57,404 --> 00:19:58,784
Took his mind off the limp.
439
00:19:58,864 --> 00:20:01,164
But he never came back.
440
00:20:01,241 --> 00:20:03,161
You think he just got
off at one of these islands
441
00:20:03,243 --> 00:20:03,953
and just stayed there?
442
00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:05,326
Possibly.
443
00:20:05,412 --> 00:20:07,752
Yeah, but Mr. Mallory,
after all this time,
444
00:20:07,831 --> 00:20:09,921
I mean, that's a long
shot looking for him now.
445
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,880
But it's the only one I have.
446
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:14,420
And it's very important
that I find my nephew.
447
00:20:14,504 --> 00:20:17,304
Wouldn't a private
eye be better?
448
00:20:17,382 --> 00:20:18,262
Now, that would be
a worthless exercise.
449
00:20:18,342 --> 00:20:20,722
I mean, without a
proper description,
450
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:22,762
he couldn't possibly help.
451
00:20:22,846 --> 00:20:24,466
But see, you all know Tom.
452
00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:25,926
You know some of his traits.
453
00:20:26,016 --> 00:20:29,646
And most importantly, the
only photographs of him
454
00:20:29,728 --> 00:20:31,358
are in your memories.
455
00:20:31,438 --> 00:20:34,228
Well, it could be worth a try.
456
00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:37,946
Believe me, I shall
be deeply appreciative.
457
00:20:38,028 --> 00:20:42,118
If the four of you can bring
me and my nephew together,
458
00:20:42,199 --> 00:20:58,799
I am prepared to
pay you $100,000.
459
00:20:58,882 --> 00:21:03,802
$25,000 a piece?
460
00:21:03,887 --> 00:21:04,967
Trying to remember
exactly what Tom looks
461
00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:08,975
like so I'll be
able to spot him.
462
00:21:09,059 --> 00:21:10,389
You know, everybody
has something
463
00:21:10,477 --> 00:21:12,647
distinctive about him.
464
00:21:12,729 --> 00:21:14,519
Now, what does Tom have?
465
00:21:14,606 --> 00:21:15,976
An uncle with 100 grand.
466
00:21:24,282 --> 00:21:25,202
May I serve you?
467
00:21:25,283 --> 00:21:26,373
Janet?
468
00:21:26,451 --> 00:21:27,081
No thank you.
469
00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:28,160
A Brandy please.
470
00:21:31,957 --> 00:21:33,997
You seem upset.
471
00:21:34,084 --> 00:21:37,884
Why are you so insulting to
me in front of other people?
472
00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:41,053
You make it so easy.
473
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:44,553
You've become so
rude and so unkind.
474
00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:47,426
You're nicer to your
dog than you are to me.
475
00:21:47,514 --> 00:21:49,394
Well, at least she listens
and does what she's told.
476
00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:55,055
Did you come up with anything?
477
00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:56,397
No.
478
00:21:56,481 --> 00:21:57,231
Now, help me.
479
00:21:57,315 --> 00:21:58,025
Think.
480
00:21:58,108 --> 00:21:59,228
Try to remember Tom.
481
00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:03,239
It's been so long ago.
482
00:22:03,321 --> 00:22:05,241
I'd have to check
the picture again.
483
00:22:05,323 --> 00:22:07,243
Boy, it'd sure help if I
had a photo to remind me,
484
00:22:07,325 --> 00:22:08,865
but there weren't any pictures.
Picture.
485
00:22:08,952 --> 00:22:09,752
What?
What picture?
486
00:22:09,828 --> 00:22:10,868
Yeah.
487
00:22:10,954 --> 00:22:12,504
The one of you and
him playing chess.
488
00:22:12,581 --> 00:22:14,081
Remember, I was trying
out my new camera.
489
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:15,376
You made that dumb face.
490
00:22:15,459 --> 00:22:16,839
Where is that picture?
491
00:22:16,918 --> 00:22:18,918
I put it on the
cruise bulletin board.
492
00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:19,924
Or was it in the lounge?
493
00:22:20,005 --> 00:22:21,965
Wait.
Wait a minute.
494
00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:23,129
Now, where is it?
Think.
495
00:22:23,216 --> 00:22:23,966
Try to remember.
496
00:22:26,636 --> 00:22:29,466
I really don't know why
I stay with you, Brian.
497
00:22:29,556 --> 00:22:34,266
Well, if you're not
happy, you can always leave.
498
00:22:34,352 --> 00:22:35,102
I beg your pardon?
499
00:22:37,856 --> 00:22:38,356
I said you can always leave.
500
00:22:44,196 --> 00:22:46,656
I see.
501
00:22:46,740 --> 00:22:46,990
All right.
502
00:22:47,074 --> 00:22:49,914
I will.
503
00:22:49,993 --> 00:22:51,373
I always do what I'm told.
504
00:23:00,420 --> 00:23:01,300
I did put it on the
crew bulletin board.
505
00:23:01,379 --> 00:23:03,969
I remember, because
I wanted everyone
506
00:23:04,049 --> 00:23:05,129
to see that dumb face you made.
507
00:23:05,217 --> 00:23:06,927
And it's still there, right?
508
00:23:07,010 --> 00:23:08,300
Last time I looked.
509
00:23:08,386 --> 00:23:09,256
Down in the corner with
the red thumbtacks.
510
00:23:09,346 --> 00:23:11,596
Boy, you sure
looked ridiculous.
511
00:23:11,681 --> 00:23:13,231
Hey, Mr. Mallory, guess what?
512
00:23:13,308 --> 00:23:19,688
I just-- could we get
the picture, please?
513
00:23:19,773 --> 00:23:21,483
Good.
514
00:23:21,566 --> 00:23:30,406
Idea
515
00:23:30,492 --> 00:23:33,252
I understand the
cruise is sold out.
516
00:23:33,328 --> 00:23:37,368
The only place to
sleep is on deck.
517
00:23:37,457 --> 00:23:39,167
It can get awfully
cold up there.
518
00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:44,211
Not nearly as cold
as it is down here.
519
00:23:44,297 --> 00:23:47,837
You can't be serious.
520
00:23:47,926 --> 00:23:48,836
Well, if you expect me
to beg you to stay--
521
00:23:48,927 --> 00:23:51,007
I don't.
522
00:23:51,096 --> 00:23:51,806
I don't.
523
00:23:59,271 --> 00:24:01,981
If there's one
thing I've learned,
524
00:24:02,065 --> 00:24:04,525
it's never to expect
anything from Brian Mallory.
525
00:24:12,993 --> 00:24:13,743
Let's see.
526
00:24:29,009 --> 00:24:30,589
What is it?
527
00:24:30,677 --> 00:24:33,677
It's a red thumbtack.
528
00:24:33,763 --> 00:24:36,393
The picture was here.
529
00:24:36,474 --> 00:24:37,814
And it was taken.
530
00:24:45,734 --> 00:24:47,244
Little late to be
running away from home.
531
00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:55,408
As a doctor, i'd
say that sniffle
532
00:24:55,493 --> 00:25:00,003
is definitely not cold related.
533
00:25:00,081 --> 00:25:01,581
You want to talk about it?
534
00:25:01,666 --> 00:25:02,376
No.
535
00:25:05,754 --> 00:25:09,014
Excuse me, Mrs.
Mallory, can I help?
536
00:25:13,094 --> 00:25:14,434
I don't know what to do?
537
00:25:18,433 --> 00:25:21,103
Do you think you might be able
to find me an empty cabin?
538
00:25:21,186 --> 00:25:22,266
No.
539
00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:24,274
These Caribbean cruises
are always sold out.
540
00:25:27,859 --> 00:25:30,029
Well, I certainly
feel like a fool.
541
00:25:30,111 --> 00:25:32,451
I can't go back.
542
00:25:32,530 --> 00:25:33,240
I won't.
543
00:25:38,203 --> 00:25:40,123
Would you like to
stay in my cabin?
544
00:25:42,499 --> 00:25:45,709
I know this is the
love boat, doctor, but--
545
00:25:45,794 --> 00:25:46,544
oh, no.
546
00:25:46,628 --> 00:25:47,298
No.
547
00:25:47,379 --> 00:25:48,759
I-- I'll move to the infirmary.
548
00:25:48,838 --> 00:25:49,758
It's empty.
549
00:25:49,839 --> 00:25:51,299
Nobody's had a chance
to get seasick yet.
550
00:25:51,383 --> 00:25:54,143
Well, why don't I stay there?
551
00:25:54,219 --> 00:25:58,519
I'm sorry, but passengers have
to have a good medical reason.
552
00:25:58,598 --> 00:26:02,728
Don't I have an
in with the doctor?
553
00:26:02,811 --> 00:26:02,851
Ok.
554
00:26:06,231 --> 00:26:10,031
There's just one thing.
555
00:26:10,110 --> 00:26:11,610
I'd be very grateful
if you wouldn't
556
00:26:11,695 --> 00:26:12,815
mention this to anyone.
557
00:26:12,904 --> 00:26:14,864
Whatever we've said will
remain strictly confidential.
558
00:26:14,948 --> 00:26:17,238
Thank you.
559
00:26:17,325 --> 00:26:18,155
I'll check you
into the infirmary
560
00:26:18,243 --> 00:26:23,083
as a case of slightly
running mascara.
561
00:26:23,164 --> 00:26:24,334
[Bell]
562
00:26:24,416 --> 00:26:25,126
Come on.
563
00:26:37,762 --> 00:26:43,312
Honey, I was waiting
for you up at the pool.
564
00:26:43,393 --> 00:26:45,023
I'm not in the mood.
565
00:26:45,103 --> 00:26:46,813
No?
566
00:26:46,896 --> 00:26:48,606
So just what are
you in the mood for?
567
00:26:48,690 --> 00:26:51,650
You, know I don't know
what you want from me.
568
00:26:51,735 --> 00:26:53,855
You think I'm some
sort of a robot.
569
00:26:53,945 --> 00:26:54,735
A robot?
570
00:26:54,821 --> 00:26:56,701
You didn't get
back here last night
571
00:26:56,781 --> 00:26:58,121
til after 1:00 in the morning.
572
00:26:58,199 --> 00:27:00,119
And then, you refused
to discuss it.
573
00:27:00,201 --> 00:27:02,871
Now, suddenly you expect
me to be all lovey dovey.
574
00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:05,424
- Dave--
- I'm flesh and blood, you know?
575
00:27:05,498 --> 00:27:07,538
I have feelings.
576
00:27:07,625 --> 00:27:13,505
I can't just turn my emotions
off and on like a faucet.
577
00:27:13,590 --> 00:27:15,300
Well, about last night,
I just didn't think
578
00:27:15,383 --> 00:27:15,973
we were supposed to discuss it.
579
00:27:16,051 --> 00:27:17,721
Oh, yeah.
580
00:27:17,802 --> 00:27:18,182
Sure.
581
00:27:18,261 --> 00:27:19,801
All right.
582
00:27:19,888 --> 00:27:20,808
I'll tell you.
583
00:27:20,889 --> 00:27:23,599
Listen, well, there were
four of us that met.
584
00:27:23,683 --> 00:27:26,643
Brian Mallory, the
writer and his wife.
585
00:27:26,728 --> 00:27:29,518
Come on.
586
00:27:29,606 --> 00:27:31,396
Brian Mallory wants
us to find his nephew,
587
00:27:31,483 --> 00:27:33,863
who is somewhere
on these islands
588
00:27:33,943 --> 00:27:35,203
that we're about to visit.
589
00:27:35,278 --> 00:27:37,608
That's why he sent
us the tickets.
590
00:27:37,697 --> 00:27:38,617
That's all there is to it?
591
00:27:38,698 --> 00:27:38,738
That's all there is to it.
592
00:27:44,913 --> 00:27:47,253
Why don't you and I
take a little siesta?
593
00:27:47,332 --> 00:27:49,462
Well, I'm not very tired.
594
00:27:49,542 --> 00:27:50,292
You will be.
595
00:28:10,730 --> 00:28:11,900
Oh, hello, sweetheart.
596
00:28:11,981 --> 00:28:12,481
Got time to play
some ping pong?
597
00:28:12,565 --> 00:28:15,065
I'm afraid not, honey.
598
00:28:15,151 --> 00:28:16,571
Maybe you can find
somebody else.
599
00:28:16,653 --> 00:28:19,323
I tried, but there's not
many kids on this trip.
600
00:28:19,406 --> 00:28:20,986
Well, maybe a little later.
601
00:28:21,074 --> 00:28:22,284
Ok.
602
00:28:22,367 --> 00:28:22,987
Bye.
603
00:28:23,076 --> 00:28:23,786
Goodbye.
604
00:28:26,663 --> 00:28:28,003
[Inaudible]
605
00:28:30,208 --> 00:28:31,248
I got a little problem.
606
00:28:31,334 --> 00:28:31,794
Naturally.
607
00:28:31,876 --> 00:28:33,376
Nothing serious.
608
00:28:33,461 --> 00:28:34,501
A passenger tripped on the
carpet in the lower lobby.
609
00:28:34,587 --> 00:28:36,207
Now, she's making
noises about suing.
610
00:28:36,297 --> 00:28:38,507
Was she hurt?
611
00:28:38,591 --> 00:28:39,681
Sprain at worse.
612
00:28:39,759 --> 00:28:41,299
I think she just wanted
a little attention.
613
00:28:41,386 --> 00:28:42,426
- One of those.
- One of those.
614
00:28:42,512 --> 00:28:43,812
Captain stubing: Well,
invite her to my table.
615
00:28:43,888 --> 00:28:44,468
I already did.
616
00:28:44,556 --> 00:28:45,516
Her name is Ms. Lottie.
617
00:28:45,598 --> 00:28:46,928
And I'll split the time
with her so you won't
618
00:28:47,016 --> 00:28:48,306
be stuck with her all night.
619
00:28:48,393 --> 00:28:49,063
Doc.
620
00:28:49,144 --> 00:28:50,484
Yeah?
621
00:28:50,562 --> 00:28:53,312
This Ms. Lottie is lovely,
young, and adorable right?
622
00:28:53,398 --> 00:28:54,648
Sorry.
623
00:28:54,732 --> 00:28:58,282
None of the above or I would've
invited her to my table.
624
00:28:58,361 --> 00:29:00,861
Captain stubing, I understand
you're looking for me, sir.
625
00:29:00,947 --> 00:29:02,277
Oh, yes, yes.
626
00:29:02,365 --> 00:29:04,115
A passenger complained
that you were
627
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:07,450
trying to steal her fiance.
628
00:29:07,537 --> 00:29:10,997
Sir, that is a guy that I
knew very slightly in college.
629
00:29:11,082 --> 00:29:11,462
And it's really nothing.
- Yes.
630
00:29:11,541 --> 00:29:13,331
Nevertheless.
631
00:29:13,418 --> 00:29:15,498
I don't want you to see him
for the rest of the cruise.
632
00:29:15,587 --> 00:29:19,167
Otherwise, the penalty for
vamping on the high seas
633
00:29:19,257 --> 00:29:20,507
is 20 lashes.
634
00:29:20,592 --> 00:29:22,222
Oh, sir, if you catch me
with either one of them,
635
00:29:22,302 --> 00:29:25,142
I deserve it.
636
00:29:25,221 --> 00:29:26,011
Captain.
637
00:29:26,097 --> 00:29:27,517
Now what?
638
00:29:27,599 --> 00:29:28,679
Oh, hello, Charlie.
639
00:29:28,766 --> 00:29:31,846
Have you read our
company report yet?
640
00:29:31,936 --> 00:29:32,556
No.
641
00:29:32,645 --> 00:29:33,225
Not yet.
642
00:29:33,313 --> 00:29:34,983
Well, don't put it off.
643
00:29:35,064 --> 00:29:36,274
I think you'll
see exactly what I
644
00:29:36,357 --> 00:29:39,277
meant when I said that's the
job that you should be in.
645
00:30:08,765 --> 00:30:11,845
You know, I haven't
ordered for myself in years.
646
00:30:11,935 --> 00:30:14,685
Well, then, it's
a celebration.
647
00:30:14,771 --> 00:30:17,981
What would you like?
648
00:30:18,066 --> 00:30:19,026
I don't know.
649
00:30:19,108 --> 00:30:22,948
I'll have whatever
you're having.
650
00:30:23,029 --> 00:30:24,819
Whoever would believe it?
651
00:30:24,906 --> 00:30:28,326
Little old me at
the captain's table.
652
00:30:28,409 --> 00:30:29,659
But I'm telling you
right now, captain,
653
00:30:29,744 --> 00:30:32,214
I'm not calling
this trip complete
654
00:30:32,288 --> 00:30:33,078
until you dance with me.
655
00:30:33,164 --> 00:30:36,504
Yes, I would be
honored, Ms. Lottie.
656
00:30:36,584 --> 00:30:39,094
But what about your ankle?
657
00:30:39,170 --> 00:30:39,550
My what?
658
00:30:39,629 --> 00:30:41,709
Oh, my ankle.
659
00:30:41,798 --> 00:30:43,468
I'll manage.
660
00:30:43,550 --> 00:30:47,600
But I won't be able
to run very fast.
661
00:30:47,679 --> 00:30:50,219
Oh, those epaulets
are just adorable.
662
00:30:50,306 --> 00:30:52,266
They're so shiny.
663
00:30:52,350 --> 00:30:55,350
Oh, and you're the only
one who has four stripes.
664
00:30:55,436 --> 00:30:56,266
Yes.
665
00:30:56,354 --> 00:30:57,114
I'm the captain.
666
00:30:59,357 --> 00:31:00,067
Uh oh.
667
00:31:05,822 --> 00:31:07,122
I got to go.
668
00:31:07,198 --> 00:31:08,778
A medical emergency.
669
00:31:08,866 --> 00:31:09,906
Worse.
670
00:31:09,993 --> 00:31:13,413
The ships afloat, but the
captain's sinking fast.
671
00:31:13,496 --> 00:31:14,996
May I see you later?
672
00:31:18,376 --> 00:31:20,376
I don't think I
have a lot of choice.
673
00:31:20,461 --> 00:31:21,211
You are my landlord.
674
00:31:29,137 --> 00:31:30,557
What a delicious dinner.
675
00:31:30,638 --> 00:31:31,928
- Thank you.
- Excuse me.
676
00:31:32,015 --> 00:31:32,805
I think I'll turn it.
677
00:31:32,890 --> 00:31:33,850
Goodnight, everyone.
678
00:31:33,933 --> 00:31:34,813
Goodnight sweetheart.
679
00:31:34,892 --> 00:31:35,642
Goodnight, darling.
680
00:31:35,727 --> 00:31:36,387
Goodnight.
681
00:31:36,477 --> 00:31:37,187
Night night.
682
00:31:37,270 --> 00:31:37,600
Goodnight.
683
00:31:37,687 --> 00:31:39,267
Bye bye.
684
00:31:39,355 --> 00:31:40,315
What a charming child.
685
00:31:40,398 --> 00:31:41,318
Thank you.
686
00:31:41,399 --> 00:31:43,529
I just love children.
687
00:31:43,610 --> 00:31:45,490
Do you have a family,
Mr. Dillingham?
688
00:31:45,570 --> 00:31:46,490
Oh, no.
No.
689
00:31:46,571 --> 00:31:46,991
I don't.
690
00:31:47,071 --> 00:31:48,571
I'm not married.
691
00:31:48,656 --> 00:31:52,286
Well, a bachelor.
692
00:31:52,368 --> 00:31:53,788
Hello.
693
00:31:53,870 --> 00:31:55,540
Would you like to take a little
walk on deck, Ms. Lottie?
694
00:31:55,622 --> 00:31:57,122
Oh, I don't know.
695
00:31:57,206 --> 00:31:59,496
I thought I'd just sit here
and have a nice little talk
696
00:31:59,584 --> 00:32:01,674
with Mr. Bach--
697
00:32:01,753 --> 00:32:03,423
Mr. Dillingham.
698
00:32:03,504 --> 00:32:04,594
Charlie: That's all right.
699
00:32:04,672 --> 00:32:06,512
I-- I wouldn't want to keep
you from the moonlight.
700
00:32:06,591 --> 00:32:08,431
You wouldn't?
701
00:32:08,509 --> 00:32:10,009
Well, all right,
a little walk.
702
00:32:10,094 --> 00:32:10,684
But no hanky-panky.
703
00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:13,472
Neither hanky nor panky.
704
00:32:13,556 --> 00:32:14,556
I promise you.
705
00:32:14,641 --> 00:32:17,941
Then, why on
earth are we going?
706
00:32:18,019 --> 00:32:21,189
Now, remember, captain,
save me a dance.
707
00:32:21,272 --> 00:32:22,862
I will.
708
00:32:22,940 --> 00:32:34,490
And I'll see you later Mr. D.
709
00:32:34,577 --> 00:32:36,037
Oh, Mr. Andrews.
710
00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:36,790
How are the kidneys?
711
00:32:36,871 --> 00:32:37,621
Just great, Isaac.
712
00:32:40,458 --> 00:32:41,458
Excuse me.
713
00:32:41,542 --> 00:32:44,592
Did I just hear you asking
how his kidneys work?
714
00:32:44,671 --> 00:32:45,551
Yeah.
715
00:32:45,630 --> 00:32:47,670
What did he say?
716
00:32:47,757 --> 00:32:50,887
He said that they were great.
717
00:32:50,968 --> 00:32:52,218
You sure?
718
00:32:52,303 --> 00:32:54,393
Yeah.
719
00:32:54,472 --> 00:32:55,222
Both of them?
720
00:32:55,306 --> 00:32:57,306
Mhm.
721
00:32:57,392 --> 00:32:58,102
Thanks.
722
00:33:03,022 --> 00:33:05,022
You get a lot of Ms. Lotties
here, don't you merrill?
723
00:33:05,108 --> 00:33:06,568
Don't say it, Charlie.
724
00:33:06,651 --> 00:33:09,571
You know, here,
you're a den mother,
725
00:33:09,654 --> 00:33:13,534
a glorified baby sitter
for 600 children.
726
00:33:13,616 --> 00:33:16,156
This is no challenge to
a man of your ability.
727
00:33:16,244 --> 00:33:18,204
Oh, it's not so bad, Charlie.
728
00:33:18,287 --> 00:33:19,577
It's like second
nature to me now.
729
00:33:19,664 --> 00:33:20,964
I've been doing it
for so many years.
730
00:33:21,040 --> 00:33:21,920
That's right.
731
00:33:21,999 --> 00:33:23,329
That's why now it's
time for a change.
732
00:33:23,418 --> 00:33:25,748
And I haven't even
mentioned the money aspect.
733
00:33:25,837 --> 00:33:27,917
I mean, you want to give
Vicki every opportunity.
734
00:33:28,005 --> 00:33:29,665
Did you ever stop
to think of how much
735
00:33:29,757 --> 00:33:32,717
a college education costs today?
736
00:33:32,802 --> 00:33:36,812
Three, four thousand a year,
maybe $20,000 to graduate.
737
00:33:36,889 --> 00:33:37,519
No.
738
00:33:37,598 --> 00:33:39,098
You're off by half.
739
00:33:39,183 --> 00:33:40,943
And by the time Vicki's
ready, it's gonna be a lot
740
00:33:41,018 --> 00:33:43,558
more, maybe $40,000, $50,000.
741
00:33:43,646 --> 00:33:45,936
Will you be ready for that?
742
00:33:46,023 --> 00:33:47,193
$50,000?
743
00:33:47,275 --> 00:33:52,105
Merrill, for your own
good, for Vicki's good,
744
00:33:52,196 --> 00:33:53,486
you can't afford
to turn me down.
745
00:34:42,371 --> 00:34:46,001
You know, that's the first
time I've danced it 12 years.
746
00:34:46,083 --> 00:34:50,003
Well, I guarantee you won't
have to wait that long again.
747
00:34:50,087 --> 00:34:51,667
I think you
ought to specialize
748
00:34:51,756 --> 00:34:53,416
in curing runny mascara cases.
749
00:34:57,595 --> 00:34:59,675
Oh, it's been a wonderful day.
750
00:34:59,764 --> 00:35:01,684
You've been wonderful.
751
00:35:18,032 --> 00:35:22,162
Do you think we could
go a bit slowly?
752
00:35:22,245 --> 00:35:23,785
This is kind of new for me.
753
00:35:27,125 --> 00:35:28,375
There's something
I want you to know.
754
00:35:30,962 --> 00:35:32,672
I think you're very special.
755
00:35:32,755 --> 00:35:36,375
Thank you.
756
00:35:36,467 --> 00:35:40,597
I haven't felt special
for a very long time.
757
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:41,720
We're gonna change all that.
758
00:35:41,806 --> 00:35:45,016
It may take a while.
759
00:35:45,101 --> 00:35:48,481
Us wonderful people
are always patient.
760
00:35:57,655 --> 00:35:59,025
Don't be too patient.
761
00:36:17,133 --> 00:36:18,433
Captain stubing
(Radio): Well, this
762
00:36:18,509 --> 00:36:23,259
is mb island Princess calling
Panama canal control center.
763
00:36:23,347 --> 00:36:25,887
Request permission to
enter miraflores lock.
764
00:36:25,975 --> 00:36:27,265
Miraflores lock
controller (radio):
765
00:36:27,351 --> 00:36:30,441
This is miraflores lock control
center to mb island Princess.
766
00:36:30,521 --> 00:36:32,151
Permission granted.
767
00:36:32,231 --> 00:36:34,441
Standby to take pilot
crew aboard to receive
768
00:36:34,525 --> 00:36:35,815
lines from locomotives.
769
00:36:35,902 --> 00:36:37,242
Enter left lock.
770
00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:43,280
Captain stubing (radio):
Roger from mb island Princess.
771
00:36:43,367 --> 00:36:44,197
Entering left lock.
772
00:36:44,285 --> 00:36:45,365
Miraflores lock
controller (radio):
773
00:36:45,453 --> 00:36:47,713
Miraflores control
confirming left locked gate,
774
00:36:47,788 --> 00:36:49,578
now be opened to receive you.
775
00:36:54,253 --> 00:36:56,633
Gopher (intercom):
Attention all passengers.
776
00:36:56,714 --> 00:36:58,844
This is assistant
purser burl Smith.
777
00:36:58,925 --> 00:37:01,425
And we now begin our 50-mile
passage through the Panama
778
00:37:01,510 --> 00:37:02,430
canal into the Atlantic ocean.
779
00:37:02,511 --> 00:37:05,101
The ship will proceed
under its own power,
780
00:37:05,181 --> 00:37:07,311
with steel cables from
those six locomotives
781
00:37:07,391 --> 00:37:09,231
keeping us centered while
going through the locks.
782
00:37:09,310 --> 00:37:10,480
We hope you enjoy your
trip through the Panama
783
00:37:10,561 --> 00:37:14,821
canal, one of the true
wonders of the modern world.
784
00:37:14,899 --> 00:37:18,609
When it was completed in
1914, this incredible path
785
00:37:18,694 --> 00:37:21,864
between the seas
represented the largest,
786
00:37:21,948 --> 00:37:24,448
costliest creation
ever before attempted
787
00:37:24,533 --> 00:37:25,703
in the history of man.
788
00:37:25,785 --> 00:37:30,115
The canal cost over
$40 million a mile
789
00:37:30,206 --> 00:37:32,996
and took a half century to
complete, during which time
790
00:37:33,084 --> 00:37:36,504
50,000 workers removed enough
earth to fill a freight
791
00:37:36,587 --> 00:37:39,837
train 100,000 miles long.
792
00:37:39,924 --> 00:37:41,434
It changed global
politics forever.
793
00:37:41,509 --> 00:37:45,299
In it's building, a new
nation, Panama, was born.
794
00:37:45,388 --> 00:37:47,388
And the United States
was established
795
00:37:47,473 --> 00:37:49,233
as a true world power.
796
00:37:49,308 --> 00:37:53,058
Over 52 million gallons of water
are required to raise and lower
797
00:37:53,145 --> 00:37:55,895
our ship through the six locks,
three at each end of the canal.
798
00:37:55,982 --> 00:37:59,362
The water enters the lock
through pipes 18-feet wide
799
00:37:59,443 --> 00:38:01,403
after the gate is
closed behind us.
800
00:38:01,487 --> 00:38:06,117
It will cost the island Princess
a total fee of almost $20,000
801
00:38:06,200 --> 00:38:07,580
to use the canal.
802
00:38:07,660 --> 00:38:09,410
But it saves more than
10 times that amount
803
00:38:09,495 --> 00:38:14,705
in fuel alone plus 8,000
miles of stormy sailing.
804
00:38:14,792 --> 00:38:15,332
Oh, I got back up.
805
00:38:15,418 --> 00:38:16,708
Just a second.
Oh!
806
00:38:16,794 --> 00:38:17,884
- Geez!
- Excuse me.
807
00:38:17,962 --> 00:38:18,592
Are you ok?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
808
00:38:18,671 --> 00:38:19,171
- Sorry.
- Are you all right?
809
00:38:19,255 --> 00:38:21,045
Yeah.
I'm fine.
810
00:38:21,132 --> 00:38:22,222
- Watch what you're doing.
- It was an accident.
811
00:38:22,299 --> 00:38:23,429
- You sure you're ok?
- Yeah.
812
00:38:23,509 --> 00:38:24,339
Look, let's have it.
813
00:38:24,427 --> 00:38:25,007
Now, you've been
breathing down my neck
814
00:38:25,094 --> 00:38:27,394
ever since I got on board.
815
00:38:27,471 --> 00:38:28,641
Who are you?
816
00:38:28,723 --> 00:38:30,063
I'm Sharon Patrick.
817
00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:32,061
I'm engaged to your
brother, you know, the one
818
00:38:32,143 --> 00:38:32,943
who's getting your kidney?
819
00:38:33,019 --> 00:38:34,189
Yeah.
820
00:38:34,270 --> 00:38:35,310
I know who he is, but
he didn't say anything
821
00:38:35,396 --> 00:38:36,356
to me about getting married--
822
00:38:36,439 --> 00:38:37,649
well, he wanted
to kind of keep
823
00:38:37,732 --> 00:38:39,442
the engagement quiet until
after the operation was over.
824
00:38:39,525 --> 00:38:43,565
Anyway, he sort of suggester
I come along to keep an--
825
00:38:43,654 --> 00:38:46,954
make sure I didn't
Welsh on the deal?
826
00:38:47,033 --> 00:38:49,453
Just like good old Blake.
827
00:38:49,535 --> 00:38:50,905
Look, I know you
two aren't very close,
828
00:38:50,995 --> 00:38:53,205
but Blake is really
a wonderful person.
829
00:38:53,289 --> 00:38:56,079
So you're here to
babysit my kidneys.
830
00:38:56,167 --> 00:38:57,917
No, just the left one.
831
00:38:58,002 --> 00:38:59,252
Well, you're got
nothing to worry about.
832
00:38:59,336 --> 00:39:00,246
George is just fine.
833
00:39:00,337 --> 00:39:01,957
And he'll make it to
the church on time.
834
00:39:02,048 --> 00:39:02,838
George?
835
00:39:02,923 --> 00:39:04,053
Yeah.
836
00:39:04,133 --> 00:39:05,263
That's what I named
my kidney, the loaner.
837
00:39:05,342 --> 00:39:07,602
That's a nice name.
838
00:39:07,678 --> 00:39:08,428
I have an uncle George.
839
00:39:08,512 --> 00:39:10,682
He's a wholesale
jeweler in tustin.
840
00:39:10,765 --> 00:39:11,635
Well, I didn't
name it after him.
841
00:39:11,724 --> 00:39:14,194
All my giblets are
completely fictional.
842
00:39:14,268 --> 00:39:16,938
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna toast the big ditch
843
00:39:17,021 --> 00:39:18,771
with a ice cold beer.
844
00:39:18,856 --> 00:39:19,856
Wait a minute.
845
00:39:19,940 --> 00:39:21,030
Wouldn't you rather
have some fruit?
846
00:39:21,108 --> 00:39:22,108
I think a banana
would be real good.
847
00:39:22,193 --> 00:39:24,993
My dear, you
cannot toast a wonder
848
00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:27,281
of the world with a banana.
849
00:39:27,364 --> 00:39:28,624
But you mustn't drink.
850
00:39:28,699 --> 00:39:29,529
Blake doesn't like beer.
851
00:39:29,617 --> 00:39:30,237
He doesn't?
852
00:39:30,326 --> 00:39:31,236
Well, George does.
853
00:39:31,327 --> 00:39:32,867
And you might as well
know something else.
854
00:39:32,953 --> 00:39:34,293
He also likes double martinis.
855
00:39:34,371 --> 00:39:36,081
So you just might have to
put up with the hiccups
856
00:39:36,165 --> 00:39:37,955
on your wedding night.
857
00:39:38,042 --> 00:39:39,092
I'm going with you.
858
00:39:39,168 --> 00:39:39,788
I have a right.
859
00:39:39,877 --> 00:39:40,667
I am engaged to part of you.
860
00:39:40,753 --> 00:39:42,463
Captain stubing
(Radio): Water entering
861
00:39:42,546 --> 00:39:44,296
the three locks on the
pacific end of the canal
862
00:39:44,381 --> 00:39:47,131
has now raised our ship
85 feet above sea level
863
00:39:47,218 --> 00:39:49,468
and bring us to gatun lake.
864
00:39:49,553 --> 00:39:51,643
Most people think of the
canal as only a long ditch
865
00:39:51,722 --> 00:39:54,772
and are surprised to discover
that the 24 mile center
866
00:39:54,850 --> 00:39:56,690
section is actually a
giant freshwater lake,
867
00:39:56,769 --> 00:39:59,359
one of the largest man made
bodies of water in the world.
868
00:39:59,438 --> 00:40:01,398
On the portside, right
now, we are passing
869
00:40:01,482 --> 00:40:04,992
a Russian freighter,
one of the 15,000 ships
870
00:40:05,069 --> 00:40:07,449
which use the canal every year.
871
00:40:07,530 --> 00:40:10,660
This continuing commerce is a
memorial to the 25,000 workers
872
00:40:10,741 --> 00:40:14,451
who lost their lives to make
the big ditch a reality.
873
00:40:20,084 --> 00:40:21,094
I wish I could enjoy it more.
874
00:40:21,168 --> 00:40:23,088
But I got to get back to work.
875
00:40:23,170 --> 00:40:23,880
Ok.
876
00:40:51,949 --> 00:40:54,289
[Knocking]
877
00:40:55,911 --> 00:40:56,621
Come in.
878
00:41:01,667 --> 00:41:05,587
I just came to get
the rest of my things.
879
00:41:05,671 --> 00:41:06,421
Help yourself.
880
00:41:10,926 --> 00:41:12,426
Would I be too
inquisitive if I were
881
00:41:12,511 --> 00:41:12,551
to ask where you're staying?
882
00:41:19,810 --> 00:41:22,060
Or shall I just hazard a
guess as to who's quarters
883
00:41:22,146 --> 00:41:22,856
you're sharing.
884
00:41:26,650 --> 00:41:30,780
I didn't think it mattered.
885
00:41:30,779 --> 00:41:33,449
I didn't think anything about
me mattered to you, Brian.
886
00:41:33,532 --> 00:41:35,782
Well, let's just say that
it offends me, you know?
887
00:41:35,868 --> 00:41:38,368
Well, good.
888
00:41:38,454 --> 00:41:40,464
That gives me an
added incentive.
889
00:41:40,539 --> 00:41:44,999
Janet, you are behaving
like a common tart.
890
00:42:16,033 --> 00:42:18,373
[Knocking]
891
00:42:36,303 --> 00:42:38,513
What's wrong?
892
00:42:38,597 --> 00:42:38,637
Hold me, Adam.
893
00:42:43,060 --> 00:42:43,770
What happened?
894
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:55,110
Please, I want to be with you.
895
00:42:55,197 --> 00:42:56,527
Janet, what happened?
896
00:43:01,078 --> 00:43:02,448
No questions.
897
00:43:07,001 --> 00:43:07,711
Brian.
898
00:43:16,176 --> 00:43:17,176
Make love to me.
899
00:43:20,306 --> 00:43:22,306
I thought you wanted me.
900
00:43:22,391 --> 00:43:23,891
I do, but not like this.
901
00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:26,647
You're here for
the wrong reason.
902
00:43:32,443 --> 00:43:37,283
Yes, I want you, but
for me, not because you
903
00:43:37,364 --> 00:43:39,074
want to hurt your husband.
904
00:43:42,328 --> 00:43:43,038
Yes.
905
00:43:56,717 --> 00:43:59,467
Here's where we
usually go, you guys,
906
00:43:59,553 --> 00:44:01,893
following the coast along
here and then up this way,
907
00:44:01,972 --> 00:44:02,772
until we put in--
908
00:44:02,848 --> 00:44:03,968
sorry if I've kept
you all waiting.
909
00:44:06,852 --> 00:44:08,562
Excuse me.
910
00:44:08,645 --> 00:44:10,395
Well, tomorrow,
our first island,
911
00:44:10,481 --> 00:44:13,611
Aruba, the town of oranjestad.
912
00:44:13,692 --> 00:44:16,072
Fortunately, the annual
street festival is scheduled.
913
00:44:16,153 --> 00:44:17,653
Everyone will attend.
914
00:44:17,738 --> 00:44:19,908
So if Tom is on the island,
chances are he'll be there.
915
00:44:19,990 --> 00:44:23,240
Will you and Mrs.
Mallory go with us?
916
00:44:23,327 --> 00:44:23,987
I'll be there.
917
00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:25,198
Goodnight.
918
00:44:25,287 --> 00:44:26,617
Night.
919
00:44:26,705 --> 00:44:28,785
Aruba, I got a
feeling he's there.
920
00:44:28,874 --> 00:44:29,964
Guess we'll know tomorrow.
921
00:44:30,042 --> 00:44:31,382
Well, the search begins.
922
00:44:43,722 --> 00:44:46,932
[Music playing]
923
00:44:46,982 --> 00:44:51,532
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