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1
00:00:06,439 --> 00:00:09,239
Kirby: Left foot, pink!
2
00:00:09,309 --> 00:00:14,249
Ohhh, yes... nice form.
3
00:00:16,349 --> 00:00:19,249
Right hand, purple.
4
00:00:20,920 --> 00:00:22,200
So, what happened to your buddy?
5
00:00:22,255 --> 00:00:24,355
I thought you were
gonna set me up!
6
00:00:24,424 --> 00:00:26,664
Oh, don't worry, Tina.
7
00:00:26,726 --> 00:00:29,526
Stanley is very
psyched to meet you.
8
00:00:29,596 --> 00:00:33,226
He just went to
get some take-out.
9
00:00:33,299 --> 00:00:34,899
What are you doing
in Arliss' office?
10
00:00:34,968 --> 00:00:38,198
Oh! My! God!
11
00:00:44,143 --> 00:00:45,753
Arliss: For most of us,
12
00:00:45,812 --> 00:00:47,412
the dream of becoming a champion
13
00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,350
remains a fantasy.
14
00:00:50,416 --> 00:00:52,216
But for a special few,
15
00:00:52,285 --> 00:00:54,815
it is very much a reality.
16
00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:55,918
We cheer them.
17
00:00:55,989 --> 00:00:57,519
We live through them.
18
00:00:57,590 --> 00:01:00,690
Athletes are our last warriors.
19
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:04,230
My job is to make
their dreams come true.
20
00:01:05,999 --> 00:01:07,769
My name is Arliss Michaels.
21
00:01:07,834 --> 00:01:11,074
I represent athletes.
These are my stories.
22
00:01:11,137 --> 00:01:14,637
♪ Don't know what it is
that makes me love you so ♪
23
00:01:14,707 --> 00:01:17,837
♪ I only know I never
wanna let you go ♪
24
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:21,921
♪ 'Cause you started
something oh, can't you see ♪
25
00:01:21,981 --> 00:01:25,391
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
26
00:01:25,451 --> 00:01:28,721
♪ It happens to be true ♪
27
00:01:28,788 --> 00:01:32,628
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
28
00:01:32,692 --> 00:01:36,432
♪ I just wanna be
beside you everywhere ♪
29
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:39,766
♪ As long as we're
together, honey, I don't care ♪
30
00:01:39,832 --> 00:01:43,472
♪ 'Cause you started
something oh, can't you see ♪
31
00:01:43,536 --> 00:01:47,366
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
32
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,780
♪ No matter what you do ♪
33
00:01:50,843 --> 00:01:53,653
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
34
00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:56,881
(cheering)
35
00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:05,460
Arliss: In today's society,
36
00:02:05,525 --> 00:02:07,455
celebrities are exulted
like never before.
37
00:02:07,527 --> 00:02:09,757
Rock stars, movie
idols, athletes,
38
00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:12,069
they are loved.
39
00:02:12,131 --> 00:02:14,031
However, even
with the adulation,
40
00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:16,870
often they feel the need
to reach new heights,
41
00:02:16,936 --> 00:02:18,336
blaze new trails.
42
00:02:18,404 --> 00:02:20,714
That's why I give them
such great respect.
43
00:02:20,773 --> 00:02:22,883
Is he singing about the
dog or the truck this time?
44
00:02:22,942 --> 00:02:25,882
Both, the dog just got
run over by the truck.
45
00:02:25,945 --> 00:02:29,875
Oh, dear God, I hate
this country cornpone shit.
46
00:02:29,949 --> 00:02:31,949
Why did I agree to come?
47
00:02:32,018 --> 00:02:33,648
Scott Erickson invited you.
48
00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:36,120
Meanwhile, he's not here
right now, so I am gonna...
49
00:02:36,189 --> 00:02:37,089
Hey, Arliss.
50
00:02:37,156 --> 00:02:39,726
Hey-hey! Scott Erickson!
51
00:02:39,792 --> 00:02:41,662
How's Baltimore's
maestro of the mound?
52
00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:44,058
Enjoying the show?
Cooter McCoy's one of the
53
00:02:44,130 --> 00:02:45,670
hottest artists in
America today.
54
00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:47,572
Well, I can see why.
55
00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:50,104
I mean, his songs have
so much... Uh, so much...
56
00:02:50,169 --> 00:02:51,039
Repetition!
57
00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:52,374
Ahh, yes siree, Bob,
58
00:02:52,438 --> 00:02:54,468
I love country music!
59
00:02:54,540 --> 00:02:56,510
Lucky for you he
gives four-hour shows.
60
00:02:56,576 --> 00:02:57,906
Heyyyyyy!
61
00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:05,990
This one's about the dog.
62
00:03:06,052 --> 00:03:09,392
Truck.
63
00:03:09,455 --> 00:03:11,025
Hey, Coop, great show.
Thanks for the tickets.
64
00:03:11,057 --> 00:03:12,357
My pleasure.
65
00:03:12,425 --> 00:03:14,055
This is Rita Wu
and Arliss Michaels.
66
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,297
How's the Springsteen
of Minnesota?
67
00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:19,332
It's a pleasure to meet
you, Mr. Michaels. C'mon in.
68
00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:21,279
Actually, I gotta go. We're
playing in Seattle tomorrow.
69
00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:22,670
Can you give me a lift?
70
00:03:22,735 --> 00:03:24,235
We're going
straight to the airport.
71
00:03:24,303 --> 00:03:25,143
I have mileage. Let's go.
72
00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:27,874
Uh... R... R... R... Rita...
73
00:03:27,940 --> 00:03:30,110
Have a seat, take a load off.
74
00:03:33,079 --> 00:03:34,459
I want you to hear
something, Arliss.
75
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,280
Great!
76
00:03:38,985 --> 00:03:41,785
♪ I wanna die
with my cleats on ♪
77
00:03:41,854 --> 00:03:45,464
♪ Wanna four-wheel to
that ballpark in the sky ♪
78
00:03:47,527 --> 00:03:53,267
♪ My dog will be howling
when I slide home ♪
79
00:03:53,332 --> 00:03:57,272
♪ I only hope God's
got a wide strike-zone ♪
80
00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:03,805
♪ 'Cause I wanna
die with my cleats on ♪
81
00:04:06,245 --> 00:04:07,975
Your fans will love it.
82
00:04:08,047 --> 00:04:09,147
I sure hope so.
83
00:04:09,215 --> 00:04:11,745
Those fans took a
crooner from St. Paul
84
00:04:11,818 --> 00:04:14,488
and basically made all
his dreams come true.
85
00:04:15,688 --> 00:04:18,488
Well... all but one.
86
00:04:18,558 --> 00:04:19,998
As a matter of fact,
that's the reason
87
00:04:20,026 --> 00:04:21,426
I had Scott bring
you here tonight.
88
00:04:21,494 --> 00:04:23,134
You asked him to bring me?
89
00:04:23,196 --> 00:04:26,126
Yep. See, I was hopin'
that you might help me
90
00:04:26,199 --> 00:04:28,969
make my ultimate
dream come true.
91
00:04:29,035 --> 00:04:30,865
Me?
92
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,867
You.
93
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,109
Baseball?
94
00:04:34,173 --> 00:04:35,683
As in the major leagues? Uh-huh.
95
00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,512
As in Major League baseball?
96
00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:38,907
The Cooter will
play for nothing.
97
00:04:38,978 --> 00:04:40,088
He says it's been
a lifelong dream
98
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:41,653
to play for Minnesota.
99
00:04:41,714 --> 00:04:43,234
It's been lifelong dream
of mine to get rich.
100
00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:44,419
Does that mean I get a raise?
101
00:04:44,484 --> 00:04:45,834
I don't get it,
what's in it for you?
102
00:04:45,852 --> 00:04:48,522
Cooter will sing three
songs after every game.
103
00:04:48,588 --> 00:04:53,188
That means a mini-concert
on TV 162 times a year.
104
00:04:53,259 --> 00:04:55,959
That means we can
renegotiate the cable deal!
105
00:04:56,028 --> 00:04:57,028
We, meaning?
106
00:04:57,096 --> 00:04:58,556
Meaning your old
pea pickin' friend,
107
00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:00,831
cousin Arliss
Michaels. (laughing)
108
00:05:00,900 --> 00:05:01,800
Rita!
109
00:05:01,868 --> 00:05:03,198
Huh?
110
00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:04,709
Call Remy Olsen, see
if he can see me today.
111
00:05:04,737 --> 00:05:06,567
♪ I wanna die
with my cleats on ♪
112
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:09,479
Rita, I need the number
for your chiropractor.
113
00:05:09,542 --> 00:05:11,942
Oh, man, I'm bent outta shape.
114
00:05:12,011 --> 00:05:13,181
You're not bent out of shape.
115
00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:14,876
You're just bent.
116
00:05:14,947 --> 00:05:16,377
How could you believe
117
00:05:16,449 --> 00:05:20,319
that I would find someone
like Tina attractive?
118
00:05:20,386 --> 00:05:21,556
You told me she was cum laude.
119
00:05:21,587 --> 00:05:23,887
No, I told you she comes loudly!
120
00:05:23,956 --> 00:05:26,286
What in my personality
would lead you to believe
121
00:05:26,359 --> 00:05:28,489
that I would date a porn star?
122
00:05:28,561 --> 00:05:30,231
Hey, you never know
what kind of woman's
123
00:05:30,296 --> 00:05:31,996
gonna fall for what type of guy.
124
00:05:32,064 --> 00:05:34,404
Kissinger got
pussy, for God sakes!
125
00:05:34,467 --> 00:05:37,437
Ah... I know this sounds
like a foreign concept to you,
126
00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:40,873
but I care more for
intelligence than cup size!
127
00:05:40,940 --> 00:05:42,070
No more blind dates!
128
00:05:42,141 --> 00:05:44,641
Oh, um... here's the number.
129
00:05:44,710 --> 00:05:46,380
I wonder if he can
get me in this morning?
130
00:05:46,445 --> 00:05:47,445
Oh, no you don't,
131
00:05:47,513 --> 00:05:48,793
you're supposed to pick up Hail.
132
00:05:48,815 --> 00:05:51,915
Oh, shit, why do I
always get the sociopaths?
133
00:05:51,984 --> 00:05:53,154
That sociopath happens to be
134
00:05:53,219 --> 00:05:54,889
the number one
heavyweight contender.
135
00:05:54,954 --> 00:05:56,324
Oh, I need an adjustment.
136
00:05:56,389 --> 00:05:57,819
And forget about
the chiropractors.
137
00:05:57,890 --> 00:05:58,960
They're all quacks.
138
00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:00,855
They do more harm than good.
139
00:06:00,927 --> 00:06:03,757
Hmm, an intelligent
person you can talk to.
140
00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:05,630
I know just the woman.
141
00:06:05,698 --> 00:06:07,678
What part of "no more blind
dates" didn't you understand?
142
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,980
The part when you said that
you wanted an intelligent woman.
143
00:06:10,002 --> 00:06:11,572
Or was that just talk? Hm?
144
00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:12,467
Well...
145
00:06:12,538 --> 00:06:14,608
Hm? I'll call her for you.
146
00:06:14,674 --> 00:06:17,244
Hey, what time am I supposed
to pick up Hail, anyway?
147
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:20,550
Oh, he should be getting
out right about... now!
148
00:06:27,587 --> 00:06:29,917
Hail.
149
00:06:29,989 --> 00:06:32,159
Okay, silver jewelry.
150
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,085
You got one Rolex.
151
00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:36,630
One set of keys for
a Mercedes Benz.
152
00:06:36,696 --> 00:06:40,396
And one envelope
containing $15,000,
153
00:06:40,466 --> 00:06:42,166
in cash.
154
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,835
I had two pieces
of Double Bubble.
155
00:06:46,539 --> 00:06:48,109
I don't know what
you're talking about.
156
00:06:49,208 --> 00:06:50,608
Hail, Hail, Hail,
you just got out,
157
00:06:50,676 --> 00:06:52,506
come on, it's only
gum, it's only gum.
158
00:06:54,180 --> 00:06:56,120
You're lucky my agent's here.
159
00:06:57,216 --> 00:06:59,946
So, what, you the new
babysitter this time?
160
00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:01,889
Well, I'm the sitter, but, uh,
161
00:07:01,954 --> 00:07:03,624
these are the babes.
162
00:07:03,689 --> 00:07:06,629
Oh, my God, Hailstorm
Foster, I can't believe it!
163
00:07:06,692 --> 00:07:10,032
Should've brought
one for yourself, Kirby.
164
00:07:11,797 --> 00:07:13,127
Hmm?
165
00:07:15,735 --> 00:07:18,795
♪ I wanna die
with my cleats on ♪
166
00:07:18,871 --> 00:07:22,811
♪ wanna four-wheel to
that ballpark in the sky ♪
167
00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:25,275
Remy, your team
finished 30th in attendance
168
00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:26,584
for the fifth straight year.
169
00:07:26,646 --> 00:07:28,046
It's just a matter of time
170
00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:29,754
before you have
to sell the team.
171
00:07:29,815 --> 00:07:31,945
However, this man's
gonna help save baseball
172
00:07:32,018 --> 00:07:33,018
in Minnesota.
173
00:07:33,085 --> 00:07:34,585
No offense, Arliss,
174
00:07:34,654 --> 00:07:36,524
but he's got no
baseball experience.
175
00:07:36,589 --> 00:07:37,989
Neither does half your team.
176
00:07:38,057 --> 00:07:40,157
But they don't
have 15 million fans.
177
00:07:40,226 --> 00:07:44,026
Remy, think, if just 20%
of Cooter's 15 million fans
178
00:07:44,096 --> 00:07:45,666
attend one game a season,
179
00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:48,401
That's three million
a year in attendance.
180
00:07:48,467 --> 00:07:49,697
Keep going.
181
00:07:49,769 --> 00:07:51,109
Plus, those who
can't get to the games
182
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:52,737
can watch it on TV,
183
00:07:52,805 --> 00:07:55,205
which brings us to a
Yankee-size cable deal.
184
00:07:55,274 --> 00:07:58,544
Suddenly, you're a have
instead of a have-not.
185
00:07:58,611 --> 00:08:01,011
Ahh, I don't know.
186
00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:03,280
Mr. Olsen, I'm a
proud Minnesotan.
187
00:08:03,349 --> 00:08:08,849
I mean, I grew up rooting for
Carew, and Killebrew, and Hrbek.
188
00:08:08,921 --> 00:08:10,961
Mudcat Grant! Zoilo Versalles!
189
00:08:11,023 --> 00:08:13,493
I would be so
happy if my singing
190
00:08:13,559 --> 00:08:15,259
could somehow help
you keep your ball club
191
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:18,198
in our great state.
192
00:08:18,264 --> 00:08:20,834
You really think
we can pull this off?
193
00:08:20,900 --> 00:08:22,540
I'm sure of it.
194
00:08:22,601 --> 00:08:25,771
I mean, the media
is gonna love it.
195
00:08:25,838 --> 00:08:28,068
Doesn't anyone care about
the purity of the game anymore?
196
00:08:28,140 --> 00:08:29,880
I mean, this is just
another cheap gimmick
197
00:08:29,942 --> 00:08:31,612
like the wild card,
198
00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:33,447
and Charlie Finley's
orange baseballs.
199
00:08:33,512 --> 00:08:35,222
Why? Why? If Cooter can
keep the team in Minnesota,
200
00:08:35,247 --> 00:08:36,477
why is it a bad idea?
201
00:08:36,549 --> 00:08:37,849
Because it's a travesty, Arliss.
202
00:08:37,917 --> 00:08:38,987
You know as well as I do,
203
00:08:39,051 --> 00:08:40,431
this guy can't hit
big league pitching!
204
00:08:40,453 --> 00:08:42,463
Neither could Bob Uecker,
and he's a household name!
205
00:08:42,488 --> 00:08:43,728
Yeah, fine, look,
let me tell you,
206
00:08:43,756 --> 00:08:45,596
no matter what you do,
and I don't care what you do,
207
00:08:45,624 --> 00:08:47,674
but no matter what, the
commissioner is not gonna stand for it.
208
00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:51,503
Yeah? Well, I got
friends in high places.
209
00:08:51,564 --> 00:08:54,204
Arliss, if the commissioner
gives you any grief over this,
210
00:08:54,266 --> 00:08:56,136
I got three words for him...
211
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,702
anti-trust legislation.
212
00:08:57,770 --> 00:08:59,710
Way to go, let's keep
that team in Minnesota.
213
00:08:59,772 --> 00:09:00,572
Absolutely.
214
00:09:00,639 --> 00:09:01,839
You betcha.
215
00:09:01,907 --> 00:09:03,777
(French accent) Bonjour,
welcome to McMarceuas.
216
00:09:03,843 --> 00:09:05,313
What is your pleasure?
217
00:09:05,378 --> 00:09:07,148
Uh, yeah, three Marceau
burgers with cheese
218
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,613
and, uh, one double Marceau.
219
00:09:08,681 --> 00:09:10,321
Yeah and hold the mime sauce.
220
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:12,493
Sorry, Monsieur,
no special orders.
221
00:09:12,551 --> 00:09:13,291
What?
222
00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:14,752
If the chef does it for you,
223
00:09:14,820 --> 00:09:16,720
he must do it for everybody.
224
00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:18,219
That would be anarchy, no?
225
00:09:18,290 --> 00:09:19,870
Man, you make a lot of
fuckin' noise for a mime!
226
00:09:19,892 --> 00:09:21,642
I oughta wipe that
goddamn smile off your face!
227
00:09:21,660 --> 00:09:23,800
Sticks and stones,
sticks and stones...
228
00:09:23,863 --> 00:09:25,233
Thank you.
229
00:09:25,297 --> 00:09:26,497
And it's Americans who smell!
230
00:09:27,633 --> 00:09:30,803
What? Are you
saying that your clients
231
00:09:30,870 --> 00:09:31,910
don't have a responsibility
232
00:09:31,937 --> 00:09:34,067
to set a good
example off the field?
233
00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:35,470
Correct.
234
00:09:35,541 --> 00:09:37,121
They're not role
models, they're athletes.
235
00:09:37,143 --> 00:09:39,013
They're stars, they're...
they're celebrities.
236
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:41,548
I mean, kids watch
everything they do.
237
00:09:41,614 --> 00:09:43,284
And you know, in
the black community,
238
00:09:43,349 --> 00:09:45,149
that is especially important.
239
00:09:45,217 --> 00:09:46,627
Oh, so black athletes
have to be more careful
240
00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:48,592
than any others?
Isn't that racist?
241
00:09:48,654 --> 00:09:51,064
Rac...? You're the ones
who create the problem.
242
00:09:51,123 --> 00:09:53,233
You encourage
their self-centered,
243
00:09:53,292 --> 00:09:56,262
egotistical, immature,
materialistic behavior.
244
00:09:56,328 --> 00:09:59,668
Wha... enough about
me, what about you?
245
00:09:59,732 --> 00:10:01,832
What do you... what do you do?
246
00:10:01,901 --> 00:10:03,041
I'm a chiropractor.
247
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:05,042
(laughs) Of course you are.
248
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:07,944
(laughs) Let me guess,
249
00:10:08,007 --> 00:10:09,147
you think we're
all quacks, right?
250
00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:11,035
No, no, no, no, no
I wouldn't say that.
251
00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:12,010
Oh.
252
00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:13,378
I was thinking it.
253
00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:15,606
What? You know what?
254
00:10:15,681 --> 00:10:17,921
This is not working
out, all right?
255
00:10:17,983 --> 00:10:19,253
Yeah. You're right.
256
00:10:19,318 --> 00:10:20,518
I'm gonna go get the check.
257
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:21,316
Great.
258
00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:22,957
(bone snaps) Oh! Aah!
259
00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:23,892
What is it?
260
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:24,986
Nothing.
261
00:10:25,057 --> 00:10:26,127
Is it your back?
262
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:27,292
Slow... easy, that's it.
263
00:10:27,359 --> 00:10:30,829
(cracking noises) Aahh... aah!
264
00:10:30,896 --> 00:10:33,066
Okay, slowly, slowly.
265
00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:34,632
Uh-huh.
266
00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:36,140
I can tell you
spend a lot of time
267
00:10:36,202 --> 00:10:37,502
in front of your computer.
268
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:39,210
How would you know?
269
00:10:39,872 --> 00:10:40,712
Your spine,
270
00:10:40,773 --> 00:10:41,613
(cracking noise) Aah!
271
00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:42,584
Your clothes,
272
00:10:42,641 --> 00:10:43,381
Ooh-ho!
273
00:10:43,442 --> 00:10:44,682
You. (cracking noise)
274
00:10:44,743 --> 00:10:46,713
You know, I have a
special chair that I use
275
00:10:46,779 --> 00:10:48,709
with my computer
to protect my back.
276
00:10:48,781 --> 00:10:50,791
I should probably just get
rid of my computer... ohh!
277
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:53,486
I know, I can lose
days on the internet.
278
00:10:53,552 --> 00:10:56,892
Everything takes so damn
long to download... ohh!
279
00:10:56,956 --> 00:10:58,686
(laughs) No kidding.
280
00:10:58,757 --> 00:11:02,287
I just switched to a 56k modem,
281
00:11:02,361 --> 00:11:04,861
And let me tell
you, it is no better.
282
00:11:04,930 --> 00:11:07,000
What I need is an ISDN line.
283
00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:07,966
(cracking noise)
284
00:11:08,033 --> 00:11:09,173
Ohhh...
285
00:11:09,235 --> 00:11:10,895
Am I sounding like
a computer geek?
286
00:11:10,970 --> 00:11:13,210
Not from where I'm lying.
287
00:11:16,976 --> 00:11:18,536
Minnesota is on board
288
00:11:18,611 --> 00:11:20,711
as long as Cooter
sings after every game.
289
00:11:20,779 --> 00:11:22,519
Governor Ventura is
handling the League,
290
00:11:22,581 --> 00:11:24,751
and I am meeting
with George Norton
291
00:11:24,817 --> 00:11:25,817
of Midwest Sportsnet
292
00:11:25,851 --> 00:11:28,121
to discuss the
cable renegotiation.
293
00:11:29,121 --> 00:11:30,421
You ever notice how,
294
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:32,089
a couple of days
after it rains in L.A.,
295
00:11:32,158 --> 00:11:36,958
the air seems
almost... breathable?
296
00:11:37,029 --> 00:11:42,329
Yeah, yeah, I was... I was thinking
about that, uh, just, uh, yesterday.
297
00:11:43,636 --> 00:11:45,736
Makes you wonder
how so many people
298
00:11:45,804 --> 00:11:47,514
can hate the rain.
299
00:11:49,074 --> 00:11:50,414
Huh!
300
00:11:55,147 --> 00:11:56,047
Ooh... ohh...
301
00:11:56,115 --> 00:11:58,545
What now? Naked Battleship?
302
00:11:58,617 --> 00:12:02,087
Two words, Hailstorm Foster.
303
00:12:02,154 --> 00:12:04,094
How many laws did
he break this time?
304
00:12:04,156 --> 00:12:06,156
Ohh, none so far.
305
00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:08,025
But only because I stopped him
306
00:12:08,093 --> 00:12:10,003
from beating up a prison guard
307
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:12,132
and a drive-through mime.
308
00:12:12,198 --> 00:12:14,068
You know, Arliss
should just drop him.
309
00:12:14,133 --> 00:12:15,533
Oh, it's not gonna happen.
310
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:17,801
His comeback fight
on pay-per-view
311
00:12:17,870 --> 00:12:19,640
is gonna be huge.
312
00:12:19,705 --> 00:12:21,765
It's gonna bring in
how much, Stanley?
313
00:12:21,840 --> 00:12:26,850
Hmm? Oh, I don't know,
I'm thinking, uh... lots.
314
00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:28,853
♪ La, la, la ♪
315
00:12:28,914 --> 00:12:30,184
Hold it!
316
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,620
You did it, didn't you?
317
00:12:32,685 --> 00:12:36,285
We had a lovely
evening, end of story.
318
00:12:36,355 --> 00:12:38,155
Oh, you gotta love those chicks
319
00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:40,364
you can talk to, huh, Stanley?
320
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:43,396
Come on, 'fess
up, you nailed her.
321
00:12:43,462 --> 00:12:45,702
No, I did not nail
her, you Neanderthal,
322
00:12:45,764 --> 00:12:48,734
I'm simply waiting until
the moment is right.
323
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:51,872
♪ Ya da dee... ♪
324
00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:58,137
The moment is now,
carpe diem, seize the babe!
325
00:12:58,210 --> 00:12:59,610
So, if Cooter can play baseball,
326
00:12:59,678 --> 00:13:00,978
can you get me a record deal?
327
00:13:01,046 --> 00:13:02,276
Can you sing? Oh, yeah.
328
00:13:02,348 --> 00:13:05,178
♪ Take me out to the ball game ♪
329
00:13:05,251 --> 00:13:07,151
♪ Take me out to the crowd ♪
330
00:13:07,219 --> 00:13:09,049
♪ Buy me some peanuts
and crackerjacks... ♪
331
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:10,521
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
look at the time.
332
00:13:10,589 --> 00:13:12,689
It's time for BP. Go
have a good one.
333
00:13:15,694 --> 00:13:17,464
Very impressive.
334
00:13:18,597 --> 00:13:20,527
It takes four out of
six to win the game,
335
00:13:20,599 --> 00:13:23,899
Or should we just be
daring and say five?
336
00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:28,839
Ha... uh-uh, don't hold
back, I want the whole six.
337
00:13:28,907 --> 00:13:30,837
Well, whatever you want.
338
00:13:30,909 --> 00:13:31,779
Arts and Literature.
339
00:13:31,844 --> 00:13:34,854
Who was William
Shakespeare's wife?
340
00:13:34,913 --> 00:13:36,153
Gwyneth Paltrow!
341
00:13:36,215 --> 00:13:39,715
(laughing) I'm just
kidding, Ann Hathaway.
342
00:13:41,020 --> 00:13:43,020
Am I right?
343
00:13:43,088 --> 00:13:44,918
Stanley, c'mon, am I right?
344
00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:45,820
No.
345
00:13:45,891 --> 00:13:46,891
Oh.
346
00:13:46,959 --> 00:13:48,089
You're perfect.
347
00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:57,643
I've been waiting for this
moment for a long time.
348
00:13:59,938 --> 00:14:00,938
Here.
349
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:04,136
You're so sweet, what is it?
350
00:14:04,209 --> 00:14:05,779
It's a new ISDN modem!
351
00:14:05,844 --> 00:14:07,984
You never have to wait
for the internet again!
352
00:14:08,047 --> 00:14:10,077
Stanley.
353
00:14:17,423 --> 00:14:19,463
(chanting) Cooter! Cooter!
354
00:14:21,827 --> 00:14:22,857
What a turn-out.
355
00:14:22,928 --> 00:14:23,938
I haven't seen this many fans
356
00:14:23,962 --> 00:14:25,332
since Beanie Baby Night!
357
00:14:25,397 --> 00:14:26,437
George, Cooter and company
358
00:14:26,498 --> 00:14:28,038
are gonna turn your
little cable network
359
00:14:28,067 --> 00:14:30,097
into a superstation, 25 million.
360
00:14:30,169 --> 00:14:32,299
Cooter, Cooter!
361
00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:33,711
Arliss, this isn't
a major market.
362
00:14:33,772 --> 00:14:35,542
There are more lakes
than people in Minnesota.
363
00:14:35,607 --> 00:14:37,577
George, Cooter
puts asses in seats
364
00:14:37,643 --> 00:14:39,313
and asses in front
of your TV sets.
365
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:41,578
Renegotiate now or get
ready for a bidding war.
366
00:14:42,514 --> 00:14:43,824
Stee-rike!
367
00:14:43,882 --> 00:14:45,852
Wow, that was fast!
368
00:14:46,552 --> 00:14:48,222
Nice pitch!
369
00:14:49,021 --> 00:14:50,021
25 million.
370
00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:53,189
It's a passing
fad, it's a gimmick!
371
00:14:53,258 --> 00:14:54,758
He can't hit!
372
00:14:55,661 --> 00:14:58,601
(cheering)
373
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,966
♪ I sat down on that bar stool ♪
374
00:15:03,035 --> 00:15:05,995
♪ Johnny said that
she'd been here ♪
375
00:15:06,071 --> 00:15:07,841
♪ She left a little message ♪
376
00:15:07,906 --> 00:15:09,506
27 million.
377
00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:11,705
♪ In case I should appear ♪
378
00:15:13,045 --> 00:15:15,975
♪ A broken down car ♪
379
00:15:16,048 --> 00:15:18,448
♪ And I used to sweep out ♪
380
00:15:18,517 --> 00:15:22,217
♪ This dirty old bar ♪
381
00:15:22,287 --> 00:15:24,957
♪ Till one day a stranger ♪
382
00:15:25,023 --> 00:15:28,663
♪ Turned my life around ♪
383
00:15:28,727 --> 00:15:31,897
♪ If you heed this secret ♪
384
00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:34,734
♪ I'm tellin' you now ♪
385
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:38,500
♪ You'll get your wife
back, your dog back ♪
386
00:15:38,570 --> 00:15:40,910
♪ And turn up your luck ♪
387
00:15:40,973 --> 00:15:47,353
♪ Yeah, you might even
pick up a new pickup truck ♪
388
00:15:47,413 --> 00:15:51,353
♪ You'll get happy and sober ♪
389
00:15:51,417 --> 00:15:55,217
♪ I know it sounds strange ♪
390
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:59,187
♪ Play a country
song backwards ♪
391
00:15:59,258 --> 00:16:03,298
♪ And your whole
life will change ♪
392
00:16:05,964 --> 00:16:08,104
(chanting) Cooter, Cooter!
393
00:16:10,502 --> 00:16:12,172
30 million.
394
00:16:12,237 --> 00:16:14,067
Call me Monday.
395
00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:16,437
Well, obviously to get a hit
396
00:16:16,508 --> 00:16:18,518
my first time at bat, in my
first major league game,
397
00:16:18,544 --> 00:16:21,154
I mean, it's the
thrill of a lifetime.
398
00:16:21,213 --> 00:16:24,153
Thanks a lot,
guys, appreciate it.
399
00:16:24,883 --> 00:16:26,923
Oh, my God, oh, my God!
400
00:16:26,985 --> 00:16:28,445
Is that Cooter Cobb?
401
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,290
Ha-ha! The Picasso
of pinch hitters!
402
00:16:30,355 --> 00:16:31,885
Fastball down the middle,
403
00:16:31,957 --> 00:16:33,167
and a frozen
rope to right field.
404
00:16:33,192 --> 00:16:34,492
That was one helluva knock!
405
00:16:35,561 --> 00:16:36,901
I sucked.
406
00:16:36,962 --> 00:16:38,012
What are you talking about?
407
00:16:38,030 --> 00:16:39,260
You had a clean base hit!
408
00:16:39,331 --> 00:16:40,611
No, I'm talkin'
about after the game.
409
00:16:40,632 --> 00:16:42,472
Singing for the fans, I sucked.
410
00:16:42,534 --> 00:16:44,374
Oh, I think you're
being hard on yourself.
411
00:16:44,436 --> 00:16:46,136
Your mind was probably
still on the game.
412
00:16:46,205 --> 00:16:48,565
Exactly, my mind
was still on the game.
413
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:50,840
It made me realize, you
can't serve two masters.
414
00:16:50,909 --> 00:16:52,439
So, what are you saying?
415
00:16:52,511 --> 00:16:54,781
I'm gonna quit singing.
416
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:56,277
You're not gonna sing?
417
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:58,128
I'm done singing till
after the season's over.
418
00:16:58,150 --> 00:16:59,590
But you have to sing!
419
00:16:59,651 --> 00:17:01,751
Think of your fans. I
mean, think of the deal.
420
00:17:01,820 --> 00:17:03,860
No more concerts,
no more autographs.
421
00:17:03,922 --> 00:17:06,362
I'm gonna focus on taking
my team to a pennant.
422
00:17:06,425 --> 00:17:07,965
Cooter, Cooter,
Cooter, Cooter, Coot...!
423
00:17:07,993 --> 00:17:10,033
Arliss: The love affair
between today's celebrity
424
00:17:10,095 --> 00:17:12,395
and their fans is eternal.
425
00:17:12,464 --> 00:17:14,134
Arliss, what are
you trying to pull?
426
00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:16,469
He has a contractual
obligation to sing.
427
00:17:16,535 --> 00:17:18,695
He doesn't sing,
he doesn't play.
428
00:17:18,770 --> 00:17:21,240
I understand that, but you're
not gonna cut your biggest draw!
429
00:17:21,306 --> 00:17:23,136
Besides, he's
battin' a thousand!
430
00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:33,920
Shouldn't you be in
training for the fight?
431
00:17:33,986 --> 00:17:35,786
I mean, it's only a month away.
432
00:17:35,854 --> 00:17:37,594
Oh, you want me to train?
433
00:17:37,656 --> 00:17:40,356
Let me see, where can
I find a weight room?
434
00:17:40,425 --> 00:17:42,055
Try prison, motherfucker!
435
00:17:42,127 --> 00:17:44,057
I'm in shape!
436
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:49,840
Hey, Rita.
437
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:50,702
Chantelle!
438
00:17:50,769 --> 00:17:51,769
Is Stanley here?
439
00:17:51,803 --> 00:17:53,413
Oh, he's in with
Arliss right now,
440
00:17:53,472 --> 00:17:54,872
and it might be a little while.
441
00:17:54,940 --> 00:17:57,710
Which means... spill it.
442
00:17:57,776 --> 00:18:02,176
(laughs) Well... he's
such a gentleman.
443
00:18:02,247 --> 00:18:03,477
Did you get some?
444
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:04,819
(laughs) No.
445
00:18:04,883 --> 00:18:07,023
I mean we just...
We haven't even...
446
00:18:08,153 --> 00:18:10,263
I'm all ears, baby.
447
00:18:10,322 --> 00:18:11,702
I'm getting fucked
here, too, you know!
448
00:18:11,723 --> 00:18:13,493
I'm losing the commission
on a cable deal.
449
00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:15,289
Arliss, if you don't fix this,
450
00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:16,460
you'll go down in history
451
00:18:16,528 --> 00:18:18,198
as the guy who
put the final nail
452
00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,103
in the coffin of
Minnesota baseball.
453
00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:21,395
Me? If it wasn't for me...
454
00:18:21,466 --> 00:18:23,066
You have to change
Cooter's mind,
455
00:18:23,135 --> 00:18:25,595
or we're giving him
his outright release.
456
00:18:25,671 --> 00:18:26,671
Remy, listen...
457
00:18:26,738 --> 00:18:27,608
(woman screams)
458
00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:28,613
Hail, that kind of behavior
459
00:18:28,674 --> 00:18:29,844
is completely inappropriate.
460
00:18:29,908 --> 00:18:30,988
I realize that you're a client,
461
00:18:31,009 --> 00:18:32,049
but who do you think you are?
462
00:18:32,077 --> 00:18:33,317
You can't go around fondling...
463
00:18:33,345 --> 00:18:35,205
I can't leave you
alone for a second?
464
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:36,110
What did you do?
465
00:18:36,181 --> 00:18:37,451
He groped her.
466
00:18:37,516 --> 00:18:38,546
You punk!
467
00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:40,317
Who the fuck you
callin' a punk, bitch?
468
00:18:40,385 --> 00:18:41,845
Oh, I'm calling you a punk!
469
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,360
Whoa, whoa, whoa, Hail,
man, great to see you!
470
00:18:44,423 --> 00:18:45,673
You don't remember?
You got a contract.
471
00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:47,531
You can't fight for
another 28 days.
472
00:18:47,593 --> 00:18:49,043
Uh, Stanley, could I
see you in my office?
473
00:18:49,061 --> 00:18:50,601
Not now, Arliss! Yes, yes, now.
474
00:18:50,662 --> 00:18:53,102
Yeah, Stanley, move,
while you still can.
475
00:18:55,767 --> 00:18:57,997
You'd better leave.
We'll talk later.
476
00:18:58,070 --> 00:18:59,340
Okay.
477
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:03,838
(kicks door)
478
00:19:03,909 --> 00:19:04,909
Good to see you, Hail.
479
00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:12,349
Are you outta your fuckin' mind?
480
00:19:12,417 --> 00:19:14,587
Arliss, I want you to drop
Hail as a client, today.
481
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:16,463
Drop Hail? I oughta drop you!
482
00:19:16,521 --> 00:19:18,521
If you ask me to choose
between your girlfriend
483
00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:20,860
and my client, you
might not like my answer.
484
00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:21,926
Arliss!
485
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,100
You know, you
might wanna thank me
486
00:19:23,128 --> 00:19:24,128
for savin' your life.
487
00:19:24,162 --> 00:19:25,242
You know, he coulda killed you!
488
00:19:25,263 --> 00:19:28,103
Arliss... you don't understand.
489
00:19:28,967 --> 00:19:30,137
I'm in love.
490
00:19:30,202 --> 00:19:32,472
No, no, no, no, no, you're not.
491
00:19:32,537 --> 00:19:33,647
You probably caught something.
492
00:19:33,672 --> 00:19:35,212
You'll be over it in 24 hours.
493
00:19:35,273 --> 00:19:38,013
In 24 hours, I expect
to be engaged.
494
00:19:38,076 --> 00:19:39,606
Stanley, think, think, think.
495
00:19:39,678 --> 00:19:42,608
Emotions have no cash value.
496
00:19:53,458 --> 00:19:55,258
Coming...
497
00:19:55,327 --> 00:19:56,597
(gasps) Stanley!
498
00:19:56,662 --> 00:19:57,962
Oh. Hi.
499
00:19:58,030 --> 00:19:59,260
Hi. Hi.
500
00:19:59,331 --> 00:20:00,801
Hi. Look, uh, I am so sorry
501
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:02,826
about what happened
today at the office,
502
00:20:02,901 --> 00:20:04,471
what a pig! Huh?
503
00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:05,996
Hey, Chantelle,
you got any cereal?
504
00:20:06,071 --> 00:20:08,641
Somethin' sugar coat-ted...?
505
00:20:11,910 --> 00:20:13,650
Hey, Stanley.
506
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,080
I'll leave you two
lovebirds alone, um,
507
00:20:17,149 --> 00:20:19,419
I'll be in the kitchen.
508
00:20:19,951 --> 00:20:21,351
Stanley...
509
00:20:21,420 --> 00:20:23,160
No, no, no, no, don't,
uh... don't say anything,
510
00:20:23,188 --> 00:20:26,258
it's all right. Besides...
you're not fucking a celebrity,
511
00:20:26,324 --> 00:20:28,194
you're fucking a role model.
512
00:20:35,167 --> 00:20:37,467
He can't even spell ISDN!
513
00:20:39,538 --> 00:20:41,738
(cheering)
514
00:20:41,807 --> 00:20:44,477
Arliss, is he gonna sing
after the game or not?
515
00:20:44,543 --> 00:20:45,813
Who knows?
516
00:20:45,877 --> 00:20:47,787
Let's hope he strikes out
and comes to his senses.
517
00:20:47,813 --> 00:20:49,193
Come on, Cooter,
come on, take 'em deep!
518
00:20:49,214 --> 00:20:50,354
Good luck, Cooter.
519
00:20:52,517 --> 00:20:54,717
Arliss: When a celebrity,
while remaining humble,
520
00:20:54,786 --> 00:20:56,346
explores new boundaries,
521
00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:59,261
everyone is supportive.
522
00:20:59,324 --> 00:21:00,464
Spectators: Hey! Hey! Oh!
523
00:21:00,525 --> 00:21:02,985
Whoo... Shin music, huh?
524
00:21:03,061 --> 00:21:04,661
Welcome to the big leagues.
525
00:21:04,730 --> 00:21:07,500
Booooo!
526
00:21:07,566 --> 00:21:09,966
If he does that
again, it's his ass!
527
00:21:10,035 --> 00:21:13,335
Arliss: A celebrity's presence
signals a welcome gesture
528
00:21:13,405 --> 00:21:15,865
of love from all those
who surround him.
529
00:21:20,846 --> 00:21:24,316
Being a celebrity means
people want to embrace you.
530
00:21:24,382 --> 00:21:26,852
Arliss, I think he's taking
this a little bit too seriously.
531
00:21:26,918 --> 00:21:28,248
I've noticed.
532
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:30,620
At times, everyone
wants a piece of you.
533
00:21:30,689 --> 00:21:33,729
This may allow for some
unconventional behavior.
534
00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:35,642
Female reporter: Boxing
heavyweight Hailstorm Foster
535
00:21:35,660 --> 00:21:38,560
is back in jail again after a
violent incident at a fast food...
536
00:21:38,630 --> 00:21:40,900
Arliss: We take
a vicarious thrill
537
00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,006
watching their every move.
538
00:21:42,033 --> 00:21:43,603
Ehh, you tell him, clown.
539
00:21:47,105 --> 00:21:49,205
Ahh! Nice, nice.
540
00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:50,875
(bone snaps)
541
00:21:50,942 --> 00:21:52,712
Ow!
542
00:21:52,778 --> 00:21:54,078
Hey, watch his strummin' hand.
543
00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:55,476
Save that strummin' hand!
544
00:21:58,083 --> 00:21:59,123
You see him?
545
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:03,690
Arliss...
546
00:22:03,755 --> 00:22:06,725
♪ I wanna die
with my cleats on ♪
547
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:09,732
♪ Wanna four-wheel to
that ball park in the sky ♪
548
00:22:09,795 --> 00:22:14,265
Arliss: Unfortunately, for
some, celebrity is short-lived.
549
00:22:14,332 --> 00:22:15,672
Man: There's no pulse!
550
00:22:15,734 --> 00:22:18,874
While for others, it's
a lifetime commitment.
551
00:22:18,937 --> 00:22:22,137
Do you take this man to be
your lawfully wedded husband?
552
00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:26,240
I do.
553
00:22:26,311 --> 00:22:27,351
By the power vested in me,
554
00:22:27,412 --> 00:22:29,712
I now pronounce
you man and wife.
555
00:22:29,781 --> 00:22:30,861
Arliss: The
illuminance of celebrity
556
00:22:30,882 --> 00:22:32,682
can take you over the rainbow
557
00:22:32,751 --> 00:22:35,721
to the land of Oz.
558
00:22:35,787 --> 00:22:40,457
♪ I only hope God's
got a wide strike zone ♪
559
00:22:41,693 --> 00:22:46,903
♪ Cause I wanna die
with my cleats on ♪
560
00:22:46,965 --> 00:22:52,435
♪ Yes, I wanna die
with my cleats on ♪
561
00:22:53,471 --> 00:22:54,971
(applause and cheering)
562
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,280
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen,
563
00:22:56,308 --> 00:22:58,008
from Hootie and the Blowfish,
564
00:22:58,076 --> 00:23:00,576
Mr. Darius Rucker.
565
00:23:01,746 --> 00:23:03,616
It is my great honor
to present this special
566
00:23:03,682 --> 00:23:06,182
posthumous award
for Best New Song
567
00:23:06,251 --> 00:23:07,751
to Cooter McCoy.
568
00:23:07,819 --> 00:23:09,959
Even though his life
was cut tragically short,
569
00:23:10,021 --> 00:23:11,071
I'm sure wherever he is today,
570
00:23:11,089 --> 00:23:13,059
Cooter's smilin' right now.
571
00:23:13,124 --> 00:23:14,464
Accepting the
award on his behalf,
572
00:23:14,526 --> 00:23:16,556
is his lifelong
agent and friend,
573
00:23:16,628 --> 00:23:17,798
Arliss Michaels.
574
00:23:17,863 --> 00:23:19,803
(applause)
575
00:23:23,034 --> 00:23:24,874
Darius.
576
00:23:24,936 --> 00:23:26,966
Thank you, members
of the Academy.
577
00:23:27,038 --> 00:23:30,638
Cooter, here's to the
only Grammy award winner
578
00:23:30,709 --> 00:23:34,179
with a one-thousand
lifetime batting average!
579
00:23:34,246 --> 00:23:35,746
Yee-hahhhh!
580
00:23:35,814 --> 00:23:37,854
My name is Arliss Michaels.
581
00:23:37,916 --> 00:23:39,986
I represent athletes.
582
00:23:40,051 --> 00:23:42,991
These are my stories.
583
00:23:43,054 --> 00:23:44,524
Y'all take care now, hear?
584
00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:49,999
♪ I sat down on that bar stool ♪
585
00:23:50,061 --> 00:23:53,371
♪ Johnny said that
she'd been here ♪
586
00:23:53,431 --> 00:23:55,971
♪ She left a little message ♪
587
00:23:56,034 --> 00:23:57,404
Uh, right hand, purple.
588
00:23:57,469 --> 00:23:59,699
♪ In case I should appear ♪
589
00:23:59,771 --> 00:24:02,611
♪ He said that she
meant business ♪
590
00:24:02,674 --> 00:24:05,544
♪ Then he took a somber tone ♪
591
00:24:05,610 --> 00:24:09,310
♪ He leaned across
the bar and whispered ♪
592
00:24:09,381 --> 00:24:12,051
♪ Boy, you'd best get home ♪
593
00:24:12,117 --> 00:24:16,687
♪ A fool and his
honey are soon parted ♪
594
00:24:18,456 --> 00:24:20,626
♪ The girl you
take for granted ♪
595
00:24:20,692 --> 00:24:24,132
♪ Is gonna leave
you brokenhearted ♪
596
00:24:24,195 --> 00:24:27,565
♪ She's the best
thing you got going ♪
597
00:24:27,632 --> 00:24:30,642
♪ So get your motor started ♪
598
00:24:30,702 --> 00:24:35,712
♪ A fool and his
honey are soon parted ♪
599
00:24:39,678 --> 00:24:42,678
♪ I'd signed up for karaoke ♪
600
00:24:42,747 --> 00:24:46,047
♪ Didn't want to lose my place ♪
601
00:24:46,117 --> 00:24:49,017
♪ Got one eye on ESPN ♪
602
00:24:49,087 --> 00:24:52,287
♪ And a twenty
ridin' on that race ♪
603
00:24:52,357 --> 00:24:55,127
♪ Jukebox stuffed
with quarters ♪
604
00:24:55,193 --> 00:24:58,603
♪ Enough to rock till 3 AM ♪
605
00:24:58,663 --> 00:25:01,903
♪ But I can kiss
it all goodbye ♪
606
00:25:01,967 --> 00:25:04,737
♪ If I'm still here by then ♪
607
00:25:04,803 --> 00:25:09,573
♪ A fool and his
honey are soon parted ♪
608
00:25:11,009 --> 00:25:13,709
♪ The girl you
take for granted ♪
609
00:25:13,778 --> 00:25:16,918
♪ Is gonna leave
you brokenhearted ♪
610
00:25:16,982 --> 00:25:18,752
♪ She's the best thing... ♪
611
00:25:18,802 --> 00:25:23,352
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